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Hey David, what's going on?

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Oh, I'm in my car, I'm downtown Austin, pulled over on the side of the street, not because

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I'm getting pulled over, I am pulled over at my own will, and I am doing a very famous

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and very common husband thing, can you all guess what I'm doing?

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Honey do's?

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Honey do list?

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No, no honey do's, no, no, no, it's called honey wait, oh no, she's waiting on my wife.

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Well, you got a big shindig this, is it because...

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So this week's crazy guys, so this is, you know in college it's like the week of final

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exams and all that, they call it hell week, this is akin to a situation like that, although

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I'm not going to refer to it as hell week because it is a glorious celebration of marriage

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and uniting of vows, so it is a very familial, you know, all good thing.

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So anyway, but it does feel like there's a lot going on in terms of task lists and

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things and parties and events to try to execute, so it's all about execute, execute, execute

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this week, so this is what I'm doing right now, and then you find yourself in situations

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where it's like I've got a lot of things to do, but yet I'm sitting here in a car waiting

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because I should have a different hat on, I should have a chauffeur's hat on, I do this

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a lot where I'm driving around, dropping off and then I wait, come on, pick us up, and

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it's like, it's always this thing, no, don't worry about it, dad will do it, dad will come,

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dad will drive us, dad will go get things, dad will go do that, and so yeah, that's what

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I'm doing.

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So how are you guys?

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How are you guys doing?

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Doing good, yeah, just been a crazy, you know, it's a crazy week, not quite crazy as yours,

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but you know, working in R&D, it's kind of that way, and I'm in the middle of a transition,

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so but yeah, well it's good that you, I'm glad that you're stepping up as a dad, not

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many would, not many do.

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Oh yeah, so no, I don't want to, I don't want to, I'm just trying to honor you, I'm

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trying to honor you, I'm not appreciative, great job, yeah, no, I get, I actually have

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the honor of officiating the wedding, so my daughter, and that's kind of cool because

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this is my bonus daughter, and I don't really refer to her that way anymore, I mean, I really

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never have, but I mean, so technically she's my bonus daughter, but you know, we spent

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so many years ago, I met Jackie 18 years ago, when this little daughter was 5, 6 years old,

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I think she was turning 6, so I met her then, at that point in her life, and we spent the

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next 10 years or so from that period of time, really just blending our family a lot, that's

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most of, mostly what we did, and we were doing ministry, and all kinds of other type of,

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still what we would consider kind of like vocational, traditional sort of like type

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of ministry, that we were doing in our lives at the time, and we really wanted to transition,

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we wanted transformation, we were, you know, we longed for a different way to do things,

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but we didn't quite know what that looked like, and what that meant, so we just spent

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the time really blending our family, and I think that's really what God had us doing

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during that time, and in doing so, we really became very, very close-knit, to the point

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where like, you know, we can't really tell the difference between whose children, and

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that kind of thing, so it was just really cool, and I've come really close to my bonus

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daughter, and so my little nugget, she's getting married, and it's going to be really awesome,

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I get to officiate, while her bio father, and Jackie get to walk her down the aisle,

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so we all get to participate, it's kind of cool, and she doesn't have the greatest relationship

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with bio dad, bio dad's not it.

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terrible individual. I mean, he, he said, you know, he's a

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Christian, and he's a good man. He just relationally very

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challenged, just to put it that way. And so that's where it can

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create some some difficulty and some, and some possibly

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conflict in terms of just doing things like this. These are big

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things, you know, marriages and funerals. And that's usually

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where families like either come together or you know, who knows

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what could happen type thing. So we're just praying for the best

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in this situation. And so it's gonna be good. So I'm glad to

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see you guys on here. Who else do we have on here? Just the

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six of us. We got somebody else. Other people trying to see you

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the chat here. Let me see if I can get my phone.

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Yeah, it's just six. Yeah.

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Yeah, I just texted Paul Brandt looks like he's gonna join us

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text him the link.

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Oh, cool. Thanks for doing that. Appreciate it.

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Alright, I'm gonna kind of I'm gonna keep this like upright

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because I think it would be better for me to see the if, if

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I need to admit anybody or anything. So tonight, guys, um,

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want to just, again, open up discussion. We had some pretty

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good discussion last week. Carlos was going through some

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things. And that was really great. Really glad you shared

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with Carlos on that. Like the breakthrough. Carlos was having

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a major breakthrough last week. Carlos, you have an update for

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us like in 60 seconds or less, as far as difference between

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last week and this week.

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Um, yeah, you know, I so I had another kind of, I want to call

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him an episode. I had another episode earlier last week. But

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you know, kind of overall feeling good. Feeling more at

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ease and kind of processing a lot. And a lot of really cool

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like these.

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You feel what?

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I said also having a lot of really cool dreams. A lot of

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Yeah, a lot of good like relational dreams of

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when you use the word episode.

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Are you? That's not a negative connotation for you. Is it

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sometimes the word recently episode probably sounds negative,

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but maybe it's not.

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No, it's just a way to describe something that is abnormal for

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me, you know, so

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unusual. Got it. Because I would venture to say that what you're

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going through is definitely normal for the hard work

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process. And also very transformative. So if you want

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to, I just don't want you to characterize it as negative. But

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if that's if that's just a word that you're using, as far as

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this is not normal for me, I get it. That's cool.

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Yeah, that was the first thing that came to mind. So I got it.

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So yeah, everything's been good. Like I said, this week, just

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I mean, the last few days have been pretty, pretty good,

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normal. This morning, I was up at 6am. Jump jumping into week

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four. So going through my readings, and it was really

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cool. The Lord was definitely talking, there was a theme of

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forgiveness. Obviously, I started off at reading that at

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6am. You know, later on the day, the Lord was just talking to me

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about forgiveness about having other people kind of talk to me

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about forgiveness just randomly. So there was a common theme

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there. And so I just kind of walked out with the Lord. But

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yeah, so everything's great.

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Awesome. Sounds good. Well, I appreciate like I said, you

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know, sharing and being open and just with what God's doing in

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your life. And so sounds like sounds like getting some

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breakthrough. Guys, we've had some we've got some feedback,

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you know, in not only in the community, but there's there's

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been some recent activity around this sort of idea in the the

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women's community. And even just some local, local individuals

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that we know, like, that aren't necessarily part of our program,

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but that are that are that are just, you know, people that we

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know, in like, extended friends or friend groups and that kind

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of thing. And that is like, preparing for marriage out of

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and through singlehood. But really coming up against, like,

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unreadiness.

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Um, like obstacles, obstacles that may or may not be like realized, and just getting

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in the way, like, like, um, opportunities they're seeing things, um, but, you know,

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not finding, I don't know if it's, I don't want to put words into this, but I think like

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just not finding the ability to make the step or make the, make the headway into, um, into

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the, into the next step, I guess is what I could say, you know, and, um, so I want to

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open that up as a question tonight to you, um, you all are single looking for relationship,

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looking for, um, your marriage minded, let's put it that way.

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And so want to first answer the simple question of just, what do you think is in your way

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at this moment?

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And at this time, um, what do you think is stopping you or holding you back?

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Like very simply, like in one or two words, you know, what is the thing?

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And it may be, um, again, I don't want to put words in your mouth, so I don't want to,

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I don't want to seed this with ideas.

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I just want to sort of open that up and then maybe responding to a little bit of that with

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a little bit more deeper, like, why is that?

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Or why, you know, what's your situation, that kind of thing.

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So, um, there was something in the chat though, first of all, Mike, uh,

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My bad.

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I did.

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I'm so tired.

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I had an allergy shot and I meant to send that strictly to you and I didn't mean the

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main group.

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Um,

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Oh, maybe, maybe you did though.

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Oh no, I didn't.

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I screwed up.

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But, uh, just to the point of, I think what you're asking is, is what is keeping us from

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moving forward in relationship?

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Is that, would that sum up what you were kind of saying?

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Yeah.

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I mean, for me it's opportunity, um, but, um, but in the midst of it, like I'm at, like

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I'm in a transit, you know, I seem to go from a transition to transition, like, you know,

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I'm going to come in a completely different transition point, um, as of August and the

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Lord's calling me into something different, but, um,

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Transition, um, in terms of like career ministry,

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Um, like getting more, I've been discipling people for so long for decades, right.

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And in a couple of weeks, a couple of weeks, like three weeks ago or two weeks ago, um,

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the Lord's like, I, you need to get discipled to go deeper in what, what you're called to

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do.

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And it's not the easiest thing to get somebody to walk alongside you in it.

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What I need.

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So, uh, but next week there's a conference that I'm going to in Reading and I'm hoping

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that the Lord does things.

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But as far as, as far as ladies, it's like, you know, um, seems to me like I've made a

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lot of attempts.

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I'm just not finding one that aligned right.

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Um, with kids and otherwise, so I don't know if other, other guys had the same problem.

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Mine's opportunity.

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I can't, um, at this juncture, I can't do long distance, so it's gotta be local ish.

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Right.

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So, but I'm, I mean, I, um, I know, I know Chris and Rob, I know you guys fairly well

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in Joshua.

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You guys are all really great guys.

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I mean, whoever you get, whoever gets to marry you guys will be blessed.

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So anyways.

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Yeah.

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Okay.

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Anybody else?

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We can come back to, um, everyone's thing, but I just kind of want to get a, a broad

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response already.

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I'll, I'll, I'll add, I'll into one word, I'll say uncertainty.

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And I, uh, I also have, um, uh, I don't even know if you can't, I don't even know if it

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qualifies as a level right now.

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But I'm in a conversation with somebody long distance and, uh, I have no idea if I want

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to move or not.

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Um, and some days I'm like, it sounds super exciting and some days it sounds terrifying.

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So just being transparent, um, certainly would love to share more if the, if there's time

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tonight.

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Okay.

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Okay.

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Yeah.

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Um, let's just go around the room.

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I just want to make sure everybody has a chance to sort of like share, um, Chris, Josh, Carlos,

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if you want to just, um, respond to that.

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I am, uh, so two sentences, first sentence is I'm finishing a season in work in a house

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remodel project.

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And kind of realigning my heart in some areas.

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So, I'm finishing a season. The 2nd thing is.

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I'm backing out. I am.

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I still, yeah, so finishing a season.

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I, I, I've decided I can't really date long distance.

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And, you know, there are still some things that I'm questioning from the past.

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Okay, the past as well, but season wise.

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Is what you're looking at right now? Okay, Josh and Carlos.

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I'm just going to jump on there real quick. So, for me, it's just a matter of Jackie told me to just kind of set some time aside.

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For the hard work, so I kind of, so I kind of just, you know, and then.

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Obviously, what is going to look like afterwards? I'm still processing and leaning in with the Lord, but, you know, there might be.

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So, some potential with kind of where I'm at moving forward, so I'm not really in the zone as far as, like, hey, I want to I'm open to dating and going. It's really just been focusing on my hard work right now.

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Okay, yeah, doing some, some personal growth.

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Right now, which is short term very, very seasonal as well.

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Josh.

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Hey, that was the question the question is, is what is keeping you.

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From either pursuing or just being in relationship.

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From a marriage minded standpoint.

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Oh, a bunch of things.

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From finances to concern about mismatching ideologies to concerns around chemistry and compatibility age gaps, whether they have children or not.

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My age, you know, I'm fighting through some, you know, against some health issues and working through some debt and past exposure to liberal.

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Women makes me a bit more afraid of even considering anyone in America, but on the other hand, long distance, looking at Eastern side of the world isn't going to isn't any easier or different. It's got its own challenges.

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And then first Caribbean 727 also discourages me on that front or not discourages me like self esteem hit but more in the second half of that verse Paul is basically advising that to men who are released from their wife to not look for another person, not saying it like you're not disallowed from, you know, getting into another relationship, but basically

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The way that I took it was, I can no longer, I should not be an initiator or a hunter or anything like that. So I really just draws the attention back to I just need to be content being single and focus on God. I got deep into that in thought the other day.

220
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I won't go into detail about it, but I think there's some good spiritual wisdom behind Paul's advice in that

221
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Let me, let me ask, let me ask everybody this question.

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Like with a with a strong, strong affirmation.

223
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Everybody on this call.

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Soon, the other guys that show up. I would ask them the same question. I'm curious if on their on their the answer to this is

225
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Being married.

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And in Kingdom partnership.

227
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Relationship.

228
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The, you know, starting a family.

229
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Continuing into family, you know, if you want to look at it that way.

230
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Establishing yourself as such is that

231
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Prime objective of your life at this point.

232
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I'm gonna say no.

233
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Yes, like yes or no.

234
00:19:52.240 --> 00:19:52.840
It's not

235
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Josh, you said no, no, no.

236
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Been there, you know, the shine.

237
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Already rubbed off. It's a challenge. And I am for it. And I'm really motivated when I see what's going on in politics that yes, I want it. I still want to get married. Because if it's the only thing I can

238
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Want to get married and prime objective two different things.

239
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I'm just, I'm just asking, because I'm just curious.

240
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Ah, okay. Yeah, no, is the answer.

241
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Okay.

242
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Other guys not wrong affirmation for or against prime objective.

243
00:20:39.880 --> 00:20:45.360
No, on the prime objective, but it's a second check. It's number two.

244
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Okay.

245
00:20:51.760 --> 00:20:55.800
I would say, yeah, it would be my, it would be my primary right now.

246
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Chris, I, I said this to Jackie and, and, uh, like a follow up. I, I have never, I really can't think of serious situations where I have not taken an opportunity and missed an opportunity. I seem to consistently get ahead of God.

247
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And so I, I, I really appreciate the dormant mindset, because for some reason, in my family, it always seems to be that if you get ahead of God, you get a mess and you have to wait for God to open doors. So yes, like that is the, that is what is next in my life. In the last relationship that was open to me.

248
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My heart wasn't super like connected. And I was not ready to dump everything and move.

249
00:21:56.440 --> 00:21:57.440
Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

250
00:21:57.440 --> 00:22:04.400
If I was desperate to get married, I could be on that path right now. Did I make a mistake?

251
00:22:07.200 --> 00:22:11.200
You know, I, I told her anyway. Yeah.

252
00:22:11.240 --> 00:22:12.160
Yeah. No, I mean,

253
00:22:12.200 --> 00:22:20.480
it is a priority, but like, but life is a journey. So I appreciate the question.

254
00:22:22.200 --> 00:22:23.400
Yeah. Okay.

255
00:22:23.400 --> 00:22:25.120
So that's a yes or a no.

256
00:22:29.160 --> 00:22:36.520
I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna like, I'm not desperate to be married. If that's the, if that's the question.

257
00:22:36.720 --> 00:22:41.200
No, yeah, that's the thing. That's the thing. It's not really a desperation question.

258
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If there is, if you have a prime objective, a prime objective to me is not a desperate situation.

259
00:22:50.120 --> 00:22:59.880
I mean, it could be if you're in an emergency situation, I guess, like if you're stranded on an island and you're like, I'm desperate.

260
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And my prime objective is to get to safety or like food or shelter, like, like very, very desperate.

261
00:23:06.880 --> 00:23:15.520
And my prime objective is to get to safety or like food or shelter, like, like basic, like, you know, needs survival.

262
00:23:16.200 --> 00:23:22.640
But in terms of just like not surviving, other than that, it's not a desperation.

263
00:23:22.640 --> 00:23:29.920
It's just a question of like, what is your first and foremost prime objective right now in your life?

264
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Is it marriage?

265
00:23:34.120 --> 00:23:38.840
For all the right reasons, not just for like, oh, I just want to be with somebody, I'm lonely, whatever.

266
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Like, I understand what marriage would bring to my life. And I'm looking for the right person.

267
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And I am just I am ready, willing and able. I've done all the preparation, or there's a few things I'm doing right now that are preparation for like, what is the mindset?

268
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Is that is that your mindset? Like yes or no?

269
00:23:58.720 --> 00:24:04.640
Yes. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. More than one prime objective. Just to be clear.

270
00:24:04.760 --> 00:24:06.160
Yeah, I guess. Yeah.

271
00:24:06.240 --> 00:24:07.880
So then it so then it would be a yes.

272
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The facilitating of this conversation is, is not really meant to like, get either the right answer or like follow sort of the list of rules.

273
00:24:19.680 --> 00:24:42.320
I'm really just trying to get at that sort of like, what if marriage is not the prime objective, then what is, you know, because there's usually one main there's, I think, I think it's very obvious that in personal development, all the all the different disciplines

274
00:24:42.320 --> 00:25:00.080
really prove to us that there really only is one thing that we can really like focus in at a time, like the ability to what do they call it? multitask? It's not actually really multitask. It's just you going back and forth between one thing really, really fast.

275
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You know what I'm saying?

276
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And so it's kind of like, so just broaden that to the 30,000 foot view, which is kind

277
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of like the broader sort of like, what is what am I doing?

278
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Like really broadly with my life right now.

279
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This is what I'm doing.

280
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I am pursuing this, you know?

281
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Like if you were younger, and you were in college, and you're going to college in order

282
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to pursue a career because college led to the career, because you needed that, you

283
00:25:34.820 --> 00:25:36.820
know, certification or whatever.

284
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And you're doing that.

285
00:25:37.820 --> 00:25:41.100
But at the same time, you're also doing some developmental things.

286
00:25:41.100 --> 00:25:45.420
The overall prime objective is, I'm going after my career because I'm in college right

287
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now.

288
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So I'm preparing for this career that I expect to have after college.

289
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You know, it doesn't mean you don't do anything else.

290
00:25:54.940 --> 00:25:59.820
So you understand the logic of the question, I guess, is what I'm trying to say.

291
00:25:59.820 --> 00:26:01.780
Yeah, I'll put all complicated.

292
00:26:01.780 --> 00:26:06.660
When I was in grad school, I think I actually stayed because of the church I was part of.

293
00:26:06.660 --> 00:26:07.820
So it's interesting.

294
00:26:07.820 --> 00:26:10.820
I was in grad school because of the church.

295
00:26:10.820 --> 00:26:13.740
I think that was part of why God had me there.

296
00:26:13.740 --> 00:26:14.740
God directed me to stay.

297
00:26:14.740 --> 00:26:17.980
And I think that was part of why he had me stay there.

298
00:26:17.980 --> 00:26:24.380
So it was like, like, yes, there was a massive part of my life that was devoted to like preparation

299
00:26:24.820 --> 00:26:25.820
for a future career.

300
00:26:25.820 --> 00:26:32.500
But like, there was also like this, this like very important part that was part of my personal

301
00:26:32.500 --> 00:26:34.180
development.

302
00:26:34.180 --> 00:26:35.940
Let me ask you this.

303
00:26:35.940 --> 00:26:41.660
So God had you stay in grad school so that you get get personally developed at a church?

304
00:26:41.660 --> 00:26:43.820
Or he had you?

305
00:26:43.820 --> 00:26:48.700
He so wanted you in church as part of whatever that community was and whatever you're doing

306
00:26:48.700 --> 00:26:49.700
there.

307
00:26:49.700 --> 00:26:52.700
And oh, by the way, you stayed in grad school.

308
00:26:53.020 --> 00:26:55.700
Which would be it?

309
00:26:55.700 --> 00:26:59.020
I think it was it was both.

310
00:26:59.020 --> 00:27:03.060
They were they were both very significant.

311
00:27:03.060 --> 00:27:04.060
And I can I can see that.

312
00:27:04.060 --> 00:27:05.060
I mean, I understand.

313
00:27:05.060 --> 00:27:06.060
Yeah.

314
00:27:06.060 --> 00:27:07.060
I can.

315
00:27:07.060 --> 00:27:18.060
So I guess I you know, I yeah, I and so yeah, there's nothing it's not like I'm in school.

316
00:27:18.060 --> 00:27:22.340
I mean, but it's like I do I do work.

317
00:27:22.340 --> 00:27:27.860
You know, not a nine to five job like I don't I'm not paid by the hour.

318
00:27:27.860 --> 00:27:33.540
Yeah, no, you definitely have a career oriented like profession.

319
00:27:33.540 --> 00:27:38.980
You know, you are a professional, elite professional in what you do.

320
00:27:38.980 --> 00:27:39.980
And I got it.

321
00:27:39.980 --> 00:27:40.980
I understand.

322
00:27:40.980 --> 00:27:41.980
Yeah.

323
00:27:41.980 --> 00:27:46.740
And I got into, you know, some other projects that I just need to finish up.

324
00:27:46.740 --> 00:27:49.580
But I really I feel the challenge, David.

325
00:27:49.580 --> 00:27:50.860
And I really appreciate it.

326
00:27:50.860 --> 00:27:52.620
And I'm grappling with it.

327
00:27:52.620 --> 00:27:54.900
You know, I have been grappling with it.

328
00:27:54.900 --> 00:27:55.900
Rob.

329
00:27:55.900 --> 00:27:58.700
Yes or no?

330
00:27:58.700 --> 00:27:59.700
Yes.

331
00:27:59.700 --> 00:28:02.700
And I'm ready.

332
00:28:02.700 --> 00:28:04.100
And I think I'll be a great husband.

333
00:28:04.100 --> 00:28:05.100
Thank you, Mike.

334
00:28:05.100 --> 00:28:06.100
Anthony.

335
00:28:06.100 --> 00:28:07.100
Quoting Mike.

336
00:28:07.100 --> 00:28:08.100
Anthony.

337
00:28:08.100 --> 00:28:09.100
Ah, that's awesome.

338
00:28:09.100 --> 00:28:10.780
I can't see the chat.

339
00:28:10.780 --> 00:28:11.940
Was that something that was in the chat?

340
00:28:11.940 --> 00:28:12.940
I apologize.

341
00:28:12.940 --> 00:28:15.260
No, but he's always affirming me and others.

342
00:28:15.260 --> 00:28:16.260
Thank you, sir.

343
00:28:16.780 --> 00:28:17.780
I feel you.

344
00:28:17.780 --> 00:28:18.780
Yeah.

345
00:28:18.780 --> 00:28:19.780
Okay.

346
00:28:19.780 --> 00:28:26.100
So, yeah, I wanted to really get to that and get you guys to sort of like answer for yourself,

347
00:28:26.100 --> 00:28:28.900
you know, and affirm for yourself.

348
00:28:28.900 --> 00:28:30.240
This is what I'm about.

349
00:28:30.240 --> 00:28:32.060
This is what I'm doing.

350
00:28:32.060 --> 00:28:37.580
You know, because like, there's only a few things, guys, that really are holding you

351
00:28:37.580 --> 00:28:40.660
back from anything.

352
00:28:40.660 --> 00:28:44.900
And you know, I'm, I'm speaking to myself as far as like, I mean, I'm married.

353
00:28:44.900 --> 00:28:49.340
So that's not the particular thing right now.

354
00:28:49.340 --> 00:28:56.660
But I am entering into new seasons in my life all the time in my marriage, that God is leading

355
00:28:56.660 --> 00:29:02.100
me into and preparing me for, for which I have to say yes.

356
00:29:02.100 --> 00:29:10.000
And for which I have to, like change, either behavior, or change a mindset or have preparedness

357
00:29:10.000 --> 00:29:13.000
for whatever that next season is.

358
00:29:13.000 --> 00:29:16.680
And so there's definitely and it's, and it's challenging.

359
00:29:16.680 --> 00:29:20.240
You know, it's not just like, oh, you know, I'm married, I'm just going through my life

360
00:29:20.240 --> 00:29:21.240
doing my thing.

361
00:29:21.240 --> 00:29:23.680
You know, I really believe that.

362
00:29:23.680 --> 00:29:32.880
I believe that God is always inviting us to the next, to the next thing, the next level.

363
00:29:32.880 --> 00:29:37.400
And not in a way of like putting the carrot out there, you know, to like in a in a malicious

364
00:29:37.400 --> 00:29:40.280
way to like, oh, you'll never get there sort of thing.

365
00:29:40.280 --> 00:29:46.540
But I mean, just because we truly go, as scripture says, from glory to glory.

366
00:29:46.540 --> 00:29:54.040
And that may not necessarily be look like something that in this world would be accomplishment.

367
00:29:54.040 --> 00:29:59.840
Like when I say next level or the next thing, in a worldly sense, in a

368
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:09.080
secular sense, that sounds like doing more, leveling up, making more money, being more

369
00:30:09.080 --> 00:30:14.760
successful, whatever, you know, but obviously kingdom values are very different than that.

370
00:30:14.760 --> 00:30:26.160
So the thing that God may be asking you to do is he may be asking you to, um, to, um,

371
00:30:26.160 --> 00:30:33.840
give more of your life, your time and your attention to, in the service of ministry.

372
00:30:33.840 --> 00:30:43.800
And then that begs the question, you know, is, is your life of singleness per se, for

373
00:30:43.800 --> 00:30:50.000
the rest of your life, or even just for a small season, is that divine?

374
00:30:51.000 --> 00:30:53.720
I'm not questioning whether it is divine.

375
00:30:53.720 --> 00:31:01.120
I'm questioning, you know, is this a divine thing that God is definitely leading you into?

376
00:31:01.120 --> 00:31:07.200
In Mike's case and in Josh's case, I seem to hear a little bit of that, but I'm not,

377
00:31:07.200 --> 00:31:14.360
I guess I want you to ask for yourself, Hey, you know, am I being divinely led into the

378
00:31:14.360 --> 00:31:24.560
season of not making marriage, our priority, you know, and Mike, you kind of, you kind

379
00:31:24.560 --> 00:31:29.080
of indicated that that was possibly what was going on with you.

380
00:31:29.080 --> 00:31:32.360
I feel you want me to expound.

381
00:31:32.360 --> 00:31:33.360
I mean, yeah.

382
00:31:33.360 --> 00:31:34.360
For, for, for a minute.

383
00:31:34.360 --> 00:31:35.360
Yeah.

384
00:31:35.360 --> 00:31:36.360
Yeah.

385
00:31:36.360 --> 00:31:41.720
So, um, so, well, I mean, whatever, it's only six guys to, so like, um, you know, I have

386
00:31:41.720 --> 00:31:45.080
hit the ceiling as a prophet of what I can do.

387
00:31:45.080 --> 00:31:48.640
And so I've, um, one of the things is like a couple of weeks ago, I was on one of the

388
00:31:48.640 --> 00:31:51.960
calls and I was like, it's time to go into a different community where you can actually

389
00:31:51.960 --> 00:31:54.920
be around people who can help you get to where you need to go.

390
00:31:54.920 --> 00:31:59.000
Which made me sad because he's like, cause I am like Mary Poppins.

391
00:31:59.000 --> 00:32:01.000
He moves me into places for seasons.

392
00:32:01.000 --> 00:32:04.520
And then I, and I was surprised that was so soon, honestly.

393
00:32:04.520 --> 00:32:11.120
And so like, um, but then, but I don't think, I don't think the, they're both mutually exclusive,

394
00:32:11.120 --> 00:32:12.120
right?

395
00:32:12.120 --> 00:32:13.120
Like, you're right.

396
00:32:13.120 --> 00:32:16.200
Like, you know, like, so, um, I mean, I'm sad.

397
00:32:16.200 --> 00:32:19.840
I've been grieving like, honestly, right.

398
00:32:19.840 --> 00:32:23.880
It's not something I'm taking lightly and I love, you know, David and you and Jackie,

399
00:32:23.880 --> 00:32:26.440
I believe in what you do 120%, right.

400
00:32:26.440 --> 00:32:30.800
You know, or, but, um, but I also know that I was supposed to, and I actually feel like

401
00:32:30.800 --> 00:32:33.840
we're going to meet on the flip side of my next adventure.

402
00:32:33.840 --> 00:32:38.280
Um, because I think I know where I'm supposed to go, uh, this week we'll confirm, I'm hoping

403
00:32:38.280 --> 00:32:39.760
for confirmation.

404
00:32:39.760 --> 00:32:46.240
So I'm not, not looking, but I'm also walking into everything that I'm supposed to, that

405
00:32:46.240 --> 00:32:49.400
everything I know, even though I don't know what it is, I don't know if that makes sense.

406
00:32:49.400 --> 00:32:51.040
I know I'm supposed to pursue it.

407
00:32:51.040 --> 00:32:58.960
Let me, let me, let me process that for a second, because one of the ways, like it's,

408
00:32:58.960 --> 00:33:07.400
it's funny because in pursuing things, sometimes we can go get so caught up into, I guess,

409
00:33:07.400 --> 00:33:12.080
I want to, I don't want to over-spiritualize it, like saying the flesh and the spirit,

410
00:33:12.080 --> 00:33:21.760
but it is kind of technically, basically that it is your two natures worrying against.

411
00:33:21.760 --> 00:33:27.800
And I think all of us on this call know the difference between when God is sovereignly

412
00:33:27.800 --> 00:33:34.400
doing something like, like, I can't explain it, but I really feel in the depth of my spirit

413
00:33:34.400 --> 00:33:36.360
that God is doing something.

414
00:33:36.360 --> 00:33:37.560
He's leading me into something.

415
00:33:37.560 --> 00:33:39.240
He's speaking to me about this.

416
00:33:39.240 --> 00:33:43.720
I don't know how it all worked out, but I really feel the sovereignty on it.

417
00:33:43.720 --> 00:33:46.120
That's one thing.

418
00:33:46.120 --> 00:33:54.960
Another thing would be up in your head in terms of the flesh and trying to pursue something

419
00:33:55.280 --> 00:33:58.320
I want, I want to solve my singleness.

420
00:33:58.320 --> 00:34:02.720
I want to solve my loneliness, which, and I'm not talking about anybody in particular.

421
00:34:02.720 --> 00:34:04.840
I'm just talking about, this is the kind of things that happen.

422
00:34:04.840 --> 00:34:11.600
We find a lot of times with people working through this relational journey.

423
00:34:11.600 --> 00:34:18.480
And so some, in some ways, when somebody is up in their head, trying to make it all work,

424
00:34:18.480 --> 00:34:25.280
trying to connect all the dots, trying to like, like hustle the situation, right?

425
00:34:25.280 --> 00:34:32.000
One of the best things they can do is like, turn that off, like focus on something else

426
00:34:32.000 --> 00:34:36.960
and let it organically actually occur, right?

427
00:34:36.960 --> 00:34:45.560
Versus someone who is like, I feel very sovereign, you know, not versus actually, it's, it's

428
00:34:45.560 --> 00:34:50.560
kind of similar to what I kind of hear you saying, Mike, is that I don't know what God

429
00:34:50.560 --> 00:34:52.560
is doing, but I sovereignly feel something.

430
00:34:52.560 --> 00:34:56.239
I feel this very deeply that I'm, I'm moving.

431
00:34:56.239 --> 00:34:58.160
There's some transition here.

432
00:34:58.160 --> 00:35:00.000
There's this, there's.

433
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:08.000
season. And it may be that in doing that transition, as you're really feeling that sovereignty,

434
00:35:09.120 --> 00:35:14.800
that you, that God does something very profound in it that you weren't expecting.

435
00:35:15.840 --> 00:35:20.000
I could see that because that kind of stuff happens all the time with God. It's the way

436
00:35:20.000 --> 00:35:29.120
God works a lot. The person that is so up in their head that there's, there's seemingly confusion,

437
00:35:29.200 --> 00:35:38.160
there's seemingly, you know, aimlessness, no direction. That to me is a little bit more

438
00:35:38.160 --> 00:35:43.520
troublesome because it's like, man, we need to get to, we need to get to some foundation here.

439
00:35:43.520 --> 00:35:50.240
We need to get to some, some like, what is God saying? What is God doing? It is not,

440
00:35:51.120 --> 00:35:59.680
I, I believe this with all of my heart. It is not the Lord. It is not God's ideal for you,

441
00:35:59.680 --> 00:36:04.160
anyone for that matter, to be operating in any confusion.

442
00:36:06.800 --> 00:36:12.240
It doesn't mean that you won't be confused. I'm confused a lot. Sometimes I am like,

443
00:36:12.960 --> 00:36:18.320
I'm constantly asking, I'm like, Lord, what? I don't know what to do. I don't know how to solve

444
00:36:18.320 --> 00:36:22.000
this. I don't know how to, you know, I'm like really struggling with this because I can't do

445
00:36:22.000 --> 00:36:27.920
it in myself. And he's, you know, and so I just like, I need you. I really need you to help me

446
00:36:28.560 --> 00:36:33.920
solve this equation, solve this relational issue, like solve this piece of the, I need a piece of

447
00:36:33.920 --> 00:36:39.280
wisdom for this. And so that just becomes my prayer. That becomes my like calling out like,

448
00:36:39.280 --> 00:36:44.800
Lord, I really need, I, I got to have this. And Lord, if I'm asking the wrong thing,

449
00:36:44.800 --> 00:36:50.880
because I'm focused on this, because I think this is what I'm going for, like help me to get in the

450
00:36:50.880 --> 00:36:57.280
right frame of mind because maybe I'm missing something. So that becomes just my focused prayer

451
00:36:57.280 --> 00:37:04.960
when I'm doing that. And, and I'm, and I'm trusting in him in a way because I've known that he's been

452
00:37:04.960 --> 00:37:11.600
faithful before. I know that I'll get the answer. I know that I will come into the right level.

453
00:37:11.600 --> 00:37:16.800
And that's when things either start working out or have the light bulb situation go on,

454
00:37:16.800 --> 00:37:22.560
or have a profound moment. Something usually shifts after that. I've been really pressing

455
00:37:22.560 --> 00:37:29.440
in pursuing that from a very heartfelt place, not from a like, Oh, I'm going to figure this out.

456
00:37:29.440 --> 00:37:35.200
And I'm just going to like, wait. And I'm just going to like cross my arms and like, you know,

457
00:37:36.160 --> 00:37:39.200
I don't know, you know, be frustrated with it.

458
00:37:42.640 --> 00:37:48.160
Anyway, I don't know if that's, you know, really coloring like two sides of the,

459
00:37:48.160 --> 00:37:54.960
of the picture of the equation for you all. That's why I'm asking this question so sternly,

460
00:37:54.960 --> 00:38:00.800
because I want you all to come to this in yourself. Like, yeah, like David asked this

461
00:38:00.800 --> 00:38:06.880
question, but like, really, what am I doing? Like, is this is what I'm going after is like,

462
00:38:06.880 --> 00:38:12.880
what this is. So when you have a, when you articulate, yes, this is my focus,

463
00:38:13.600 --> 00:38:20.000
then sometimes behavior, the decisions, the things that you've been doing might need to

464
00:38:20.000 --> 00:38:24.320
change a little bit. You might need to make an adjustment. So it's like, Oh yeah, this is my

465
00:38:24.320 --> 00:38:29.920
prime objective. So I got a few adjustments I'm going to make here in order to continue on in

466
00:38:29.920 --> 00:38:36.880
that path type of thing. Yeah. So no, basically it's just seek first the kingdom and his

467
00:38:36.880 --> 00:38:40.880
righteousness and everything else will be added unto you. Right. And, you know, I mean, yeah,

468
00:38:40.880 --> 00:38:49.680
it is. And that, that, that is like, so overused, unfortunately it becomes very common, but yes,

469
00:38:49.680 --> 00:38:56.320
that is exactly the beauty of that statement is just that it's like, yeah, seek first, you know,

470
00:38:57.280 --> 00:39:02.720
and, and these things will reveal themselves. These things will come to you. Things will

471
00:39:02.720 --> 00:39:09.920
manifest before you and come sometimes out of like, even hiding like, whoa, that surprised me.

472
00:39:09.920 --> 00:39:14.640
I was expecting that, but I didn't expect it to come that way. And here it is. Praise God. Wow.

473
00:39:14.960 --> 00:39:24.240
That's amazing. You know? So any comments, any reactions to this?

474
00:39:27.440 --> 00:39:35.600
I have just some thoughts on it. You know, everything I've known you guys for the last

475
00:39:35.600 --> 00:39:41.040
couple of years, none about the program for the last couple of years and never really

476
00:39:41.840 --> 00:39:46.640
um, if you were to ask me back then, Hey, are you, uh, what's your goal? Or do you want to

477
00:39:46.640 --> 00:39:51.680
get married? I'm like, yeah, that's kind of where I want to lead, um, or where I want to end up.

478
00:39:52.320 --> 00:39:59.520
But it wasn't until a couple of weeks ago where the Lord really brought me in and like, I signed up.

479
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:08.640
to the program and I felt the Lord opened the door for me to take action to implement my belief

480
00:40:09.520 --> 00:40:15.680
of saying, yes, I actually want to get married, so what am I going to do? And it's not even me,

481
00:40:15.680 --> 00:40:22.720
literally the Lord's like, hey, I had a buddy of mine give me a dream interpretation

482
00:40:23.600 --> 00:40:27.920
and saying, hey, I think the Lord's going to invite you into a time of healing.

483
00:40:28.640 --> 00:40:35.120
Literally the week after that, some things happened and here I am, I started the program.

484
00:40:35.680 --> 00:40:41.360
So all that to say is two years ago would have been my response would have been like, yeah,

485
00:40:41.360 --> 00:40:47.760
but was it divinely orchestrated? Maybe the Lord had invited me, but it wasn't until this very last

486
00:40:47.760 --> 00:40:53.280
thing that, okay, I'm going to go, Lord, it's going to push me into action. And as I stepped

487
00:40:53.360 --> 00:40:59.120
into the last couple of weeks for myself, understanding and seeing like, oh, I actually

488
00:40:59.120 --> 00:41:04.320
really did have a lot of things that I needed to work on. So even of me praying like, Lord,

489
00:41:04.320 --> 00:41:09.360
I'd love to find a wife. I'd love to just have a good relationship. All those things are all great.

490
00:41:09.360 --> 00:41:14.800
However, there were things within my heart that needed to be healed that I could not see for

491
00:41:14.800 --> 00:41:22.960
myself or that I could not heal myself. And so when we talk about having a divine orchestrating

492
00:41:22.960 --> 00:41:28.640
of things happening, it's like, I can see over the last few weeks where the Lord opened the door.

493
00:41:28.640 --> 00:41:33.760
I, you know, I'm currently in grad school. I work full time. You know, I had just finished

494
00:41:33.760 --> 00:41:39.440
paying for a few classes over the summer and I was tight on money, you know, I was just like,

495
00:41:39.440 --> 00:41:44.160
Lord, I don't know. And if I wanted to do the program or not, finally I decided, okay,

496
00:41:44.160 --> 00:41:51.760
I'm going to do it. But I guess that to answer your question where, you know, it's multifaceted

497
00:41:51.760 --> 00:41:59.440
here, but yes, I feel like from my perspective, being invited into a divine process with the Holy

498
00:41:59.440 --> 00:42:06.000
Spirit to uncover some of the things so that my ultimate goal would be to one, honor my father,

499
00:42:06.000 --> 00:42:13.600
right. But also to be prepared to be able to take on, you know, being a husband and a father and

500
00:42:13.600 --> 00:42:19.360
things, you know, within that. So for me, that would be it. Hopefully that makes sense as far

501
00:42:19.360 --> 00:42:24.960
as taking action would be the other one for me. It's like, yeah, you know, I could have probably

502
00:42:24.960 --> 00:42:31.120
taken action a couple of years ago and, you know, the Lord is patient and faithful. But here I am,

503
00:42:31.120 --> 00:42:37.360
where it's like, okay, this is my primary objective. And the way that I related to that is,

504
00:42:37.360 --> 00:42:43.200
you know, being a fireman, like, you know, at a fire, you have a lot of different objectives going

505
00:42:43.200 --> 00:42:48.560
on, right. But there's usually when you have something, a primary objective, there is a plan

506
00:42:48.560 --> 00:42:54.240
in place for a strategic plan for you to be to go after what you need to go after. And I feel like

507
00:42:54.880 --> 00:42:59.360
that for me is this, right. So that's kind of where I felt like the Lord was kind of opening

508
00:42:59.360 --> 00:43:03.440
and directing and guiding me and what it looks like on the other side. It's, you know, yet to

509
00:43:03.440 --> 00:43:10.560
be seen, but knowing God, I'm sure it's going to be great. I'll tell you this, guys. You know,

510
00:43:10.560 --> 00:43:16.240
I'm not always, I'm really still kind of not. I'm not, I mean, Carlos just outlined, yeah,

511
00:43:16.240 --> 00:43:22.640
you know, like, going, like, really, really throwing out some, like, some words, like,

512
00:43:24.720 --> 00:43:29.600
I forget the actual phrases that you're using, but like, you know, basically making it sound

513
00:43:29.600 --> 00:43:36.160
like you got to set goals and make it happen. I've never been that kind of person. You know,

514
00:43:36.160 --> 00:43:42.320
I've always sort of like, oh, that's a type A person. I'm not type A. I'm not go getter. I'm

515
00:43:42.320 --> 00:43:48.480
not like a goal setter type thing. I'm not like, you know, achievement oriented. I have very low

516
00:43:48.480 --> 00:43:56.880
ambition. I'll just be honest with you in a lot of ways. I've been forced into ambition in my life

517
00:43:56.880 --> 00:44:04.640
in a lot of ways. And, and some of it, you know, is authentic. And some of it is like, you know,

518
00:44:04.640 --> 00:44:11.120
I feel like it was just God just prodding me. So I'm thankful for God, you know, sort of, you know,

519
00:44:13.040 --> 00:44:23.920
what's the word, like, really compelling you, you know, in positive, good ways to, and then

520
00:44:23.920 --> 00:44:31.840
sometimes people, they will prod you into those ways. And they may be agents of the Lord, you know,

521
00:44:31.840 --> 00:44:39.040
in that way. So I'll tell you that. So I'm not as familiar with the whole setting goals and

522
00:44:39.040 --> 00:44:44.960
achieving them and getting them out there. So that's why this question too, is very difficult

523
00:44:44.960 --> 00:44:49.840
for me. It's just like, what are you doing? Like, I was asked that a number of years ago

524
00:44:49.840 --> 00:44:57.120
with my career. I was in sales, I was in door to door. This was after I had come out of ministry,

525
00:44:58.000 --> 00:44:59.200
vocational ministry for

526
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:04.660
couple decades. And I was really trying to find myself. And so

527
00:45:04.660 --> 00:45:08.160
the only thing I could knew to do, that was easy enough for me

528
00:45:08.160 --> 00:45:12.040
to just get into and get the job because I was trying to figure

529
00:45:12.040 --> 00:45:15.300
out how to get my resume, you know, shifted over, I was just

530
00:45:15.300 --> 00:45:20.420
doing sales, I was doing door to door sales. And there was a man

531
00:45:20.420 --> 00:45:24.380
that was in there was a father of one of the teenagers that

532
00:45:24.560 --> 00:45:30.500
that was in my youth group a couple years prior to that. I

533
00:45:30.500 --> 00:45:35.520
knew him from church and he was just buzz. One of the dads, his

534
00:45:35.520 --> 00:45:39.080
name was buzz. And he was just one of the dads and he was a

535
00:45:39.080 --> 00:45:42.120
cool dad and I love buzz and buzz volunteered and he was a

536
00:45:42.120 --> 00:45:44.360
good parent. He was a cool parent, you know, and he

537
00:45:44.360 --> 00:45:46.320
understood what we were doing in youth ministry and all that

538
00:45:46.320 --> 00:45:51.620
kind of stuff. And years later, I not worked in vocational

539
00:45:51.620 --> 00:45:56.280
ministry. And so here I am trying to struggle to find my

540
00:45:56.280 --> 00:46:00.120
identity and who I really am in terms of just making an income.

541
00:46:00.920 --> 00:46:04.220
And he reached out to I think was my mom or my wife and he

542
00:46:04.220 --> 00:46:09.040
said, Hey, you know, I'd like to help David if I could. And so I

543
00:46:09.040 --> 00:46:13.480
went to his office one day, and he worked for Nationwide

544
00:46:13.480 --> 00:46:18.680
Insurance. Columbus, Ohio is the the international headquarters

545
00:46:18.680 --> 00:46:20.140
for Nationwide Insurance.

546
00:46:20.220 --> 00:46:23.740
Hey, real quick. And he Yeah, you're talking to Mr.

547
00:46:23.740 --> 00:46:27.340
Nationwide. I was in Columbus last week. Keep going. No way.

548
00:46:27.500 --> 00:46:29.940
Yeah, I'm a nationwider. Keep going. I'm on your I'm on your

549
00:46:29.940 --> 00:46:30.300
side.

550
00:46:31.060 --> 00:46:37.820
On your side. Cool. He is a he is a director. He was director

551
00:46:37.820 --> 00:46:42.020
of change management for a while and then he's he's a he's a he

552
00:46:42.020 --> 00:46:45.420
became a vice president. He became an actual What do you

553
00:46:45.420 --> 00:46:51.360
call it? A credited or recognized officer of the

554
00:46:51.360 --> 00:46:57.880
company. And this man does not have a college degree. But he's

555
00:46:57.880 --> 00:47:02.220
a recognized, he does not have a college degree, worked his way

556
00:47:02.220 --> 00:47:07.720
up through all of this. And he is a profound mentor. And it's

557
00:47:07.720 --> 00:47:11.680
one of his passions. And so I came to him. And I'm thinking,

558
00:47:11.680 --> 00:47:14.880
man, I'm gonna go meet with my friend buzz. And I sat down in

559
00:47:14.880 --> 00:47:20.740
his office. And he goes, Okay, so this is how this goes. And

560
00:47:20.740 --> 00:47:22.900
I'm sitting in this office. Now I'm a little intimidated

561
00:47:22.900 --> 00:47:26.060
because I'm not a corporate guy. But I'm sitting in this very

562
00:47:26.060 --> 00:47:32.620
tall building, corporate office, buzz Weckner. And buzz, he goes,

563
00:47:33.060 --> 00:47:36.700
Where's your resume? And I was like, Oh, yeah, I do have a copy

564
00:47:36.700 --> 00:47:40.020
of because he told me to bring one. And I handed him one page

565
00:47:40.020 --> 00:47:46.240
resume. And he read it in about 30 seconds. And he goes, this

566
00:47:46.240 --> 00:47:53.000
is terrible. What? What do you mean? He goes, this right here.

567
00:47:53.040 --> 00:47:57.720
This is horrible. He goes, What do you make a year? And I told

568
00:47:57.720 --> 00:48:04.800
him, he goes, you make what? That's, that's, that's a way

569
00:48:04.800 --> 00:48:08.240
under where you should be. He goes, my son is 20 something

570
00:48:08.240 --> 00:48:10.780
years old, and he almost is gonna, he's gonna he's a

571
00:48:10.780 --> 00:48:14.340
manager, he's also almost gonna make about twice that this next

572
00:48:14.340 --> 00:48:21.140
year. And I'm like, okay, I'm feeling like the worst. This is

573
00:48:21.140 --> 00:48:26.180
my friend buzz. I've not met executive director, Vice

574
00:48:26.180 --> 00:48:32.340
President buzz, nationwide insurance, who is like, the real

575
00:48:32.340 --> 00:48:37.340
deal. Right. And he literally read me my mail. He was just

576
00:48:37.340 --> 00:48:41.920
like, Oh, my God. He goes, he goes, I know you, because I know

577
00:48:41.920 --> 00:48:45.960
that you're better than this. He basically was like, what are you

578
00:48:45.960 --> 00:48:51.320
doing? Are you doing with your life? And I'm like, yeah,

579
00:48:51.360 --> 00:48:55.040
exactly. What am I doing with my life? I have no idea who I am.

580
00:48:55.240 --> 00:49:01.760
He goes, that's obvious. And he was direct with me. And it was

581
00:49:01.760 --> 00:49:04.160
the biggest wake one of the biggest wake up calls ever had

582
00:49:04.160 --> 00:49:11.420
my life. But it was such that like, within nine months, I was

583
00:49:11.420 --> 00:49:14.700
able to go back to him because of the just a few meetings I had

584
00:49:14.900 --> 00:49:18.680
and the few changes I made. I was able to go back to him and

585
00:49:18.700 --> 00:49:23.900
report to him that I had leveled up into a promotion that was

586
00:49:23.900 --> 00:49:27.540
equivalent to what it was that he was outlining the where the

587
00:49:27.540 --> 00:49:32.300
where I could be. The problem was, is that at the time when I

588
00:49:32.300 --> 00:49:37.240
first met with him, I did not know that I could be that until

589
00:49:37.240 --> 00:49:43.200
he told me in a roundabout way. What are you doing? You

590
00:49:43.200 --> 00:49:50.400
shouldn't be here. You should be here. I'm like, Whoa. And it was

591
00:49:50.400 --> 00:49:57.360
humbling. It was embarrassing. It was encouraging. And it was

592
00:49:57.360 --> 00:49:58.920
stripped down

593
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:08.000
But it was uplifting and it was scary and also peaceful and comforting at the same time.

594
00:50:08.000 --> 00:50:14.000
And so I was thankful for Buzz and I went back to him and I reported to him.

595
00:50:14.000 --> 00:50:17.000
I said, this is what happened, the promotion and all that and I told him the story.

596
00:50:17.000 --> 00:50:20.000
And he was like, oh my gosh, that's amazing.

597
00:50:20.000 --> 00:50:22.000
Like, I'm so proud of you.

598
00:50:22.000 --> 00:50:31.000
And it was just like almost a dad, a father figure telling me that, you know, yeah, you did it. I'm proud of you.

599
00:50:31.000 --> 00:50:44.000
So I guess I'm telling you that story because I feel like, I feel like, I feel like you can and you should have that relationship with God.

600
00:50:44.000 --> 00:50:49.000
I feel like, I feel like God wants to be that for you.

601
00:50:49.000 --> 00:50:56.000
I feel like others in your life want to be that for you, so let them be.

602
00:50:56.000 --> 00:51:10.000
I feel like that there is, there's a, there's power in somebody calling you higher and telling you that, you know what?

603
00:51:11.000 --> 00:51:18.000
I mean, obviously from our perspective, last year single, dealing with relationships, all that kind of stuff.

604
00:51:18.000 --> 00:51:24.000
We err on the side of, you should be pursuing marriage.

605
00:51:24.000 --> 00:51:34.000
And we differentiate between that, which is the prime objective, I think, for all human relationships.

606
00:51:35.000 --> 00:51:49.000
Except there are occasions where it's obviously very, very solidified in scripture that there are individuals that are called to an anointing, to an empowerment of singleness for a specific purpose.

607
00:51:49.000 --> 00:51:57.000
And it outlines, when it talks about that, it outlines pretty good what kind of like, what the attitude is.

608
00:51:57.000 --> 00:52:07.000
And so like when you see young single people, there's nobody on this call that's really like young, young, like as in like mid-20s type of thing, right?

609
00:52:07.000 --> 00:52:16.000
And when you see young people and they're just like, yeah, you know, I'm finding myself and doing my thing and all that kind of stuff.

610
00:52:16.000 --> 00:52:17.000
And I'm really pursuing that.

611
00:52:17.000 --> 00:52:18.000
And I'm like, I get that.

612
00:52:18.000 --> 00:52:20.000
I get that in this modern world.

613
00:52:20.000 --> 00:52:23.000
That probably wouldn't make it very good in an ancient world.

614
00:52:24.000 --> 00:52:31.000
But in the modern world, it's a little bit more understandable because this is so much that it takes even just to like go about this life.

615
00:52:31.000 --> 00:52:46.000
But when you see that, and you see that consistently then into the 30s, into the later on in life, and it's discouraging because it's like, no, eventually it becomes, you don't have an anointing to be single.

616
00:52:46.000 --> 00:52:57.000
You just don't want to step up into what it is that is, you know, finding that relationship and making that prime objective.

617
00:52:57.000 --> 00:53:05.000
Like, you know, there's obstacles in your way and you're allowing those obstacles to be there.

618
00:53:06.000 --> 00:53:16.000
He goes, you're allowing all this stuff and why you aren't where you're supposed to be, to be all the reasons and excuses and problems.

619
00:53:16.000 --> 00:53:19.000
And not that they weren't real.

620
00:53:19.000 --> 00:53:21.000
They were very real.

621
00:53:21.000 --> 00:53:33.000
They were things that I was allowing myself to get in my way for not being the kind of provider that I should have been for my family at the time.

622
00:53:34.000 --> 00:53:36.000
And I could have been.

623
00:53:36.000 --> 00:53:40.000
Because with that didn't come just an increase in income.

624
00:53:40.000 --> 00:53:46.000
It didn't just come, you know, just to say that I did it.

625
00:53:46.000 --> 00:53:53.000
With that came a level of responsibility and saying yes.

626
00:53:53.000 --> 00:53:58.000
And my family looking at me like, oh, that's not just some guy that's kind of losing.

627
00:53:58.000 --> 00:54:00.000
He's found himself.

628
00:54:00.000 --> 00:54:02.000
Like there's something that sparked.

629
00:54:02.000 --> 00:54:07.000
It made the difference in every area of my life, not just like my income.

630
00:54:07.000 --> 00:54:10.000
Or not just a thing on my resume.

631
00:54:10.000 --> 00:54:14.000
It makes a difference in the broad perspective of the whole thing.

632
00:54:14.000 --> 00:54:35.000
So like when I say, you know, we need good men to level up and accept the responsibility of pursuing all the right things in their life, including the prime objective of being in, you know, finding your spirit mate.

633
00:54:35.000 --> 00:54:39.000
I mean, that's that's an invitation.

634
00:54:40.000 --> 00:54:42.000
That is like, wow.

635
00:54:42.000 --> 00:54:44.000
I mean, that's like a powerful thing.

636
00:54:44.000 --> 00:55:00.000
And so I applaud you all for plodding away at this, for pursuing, for going forward in what it is that you're you're called to do.

637
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:02.160
Because I see you as guys showing up.

638
00:55:04.440 --> 00:55:09.360
I see you as guys feeling the weight of the calling of the

639
00:55:09.360 --> 00:55:13.320
Lord in this. There's no shame. There's no there's no dis on

640
00:55:13.320 --> 00:55:14.200
this call at all.

641
00:55:15.600 --> 00:55:19.480
The call that we're having tonight is just a call to try to

642
00:55:19.480 --> 00:55:24.880
clarify in your voice to say, this is what I'm doing.

643
00:55:26.000 --> 00:55:27.280
This is what I'm about.

644
00:55:28.200 --> 00:55:29.640
This is where I'm going.

645
00:55:30.840 --> 00:55:31.400
You know,

646
00:55:33.400 --> 00:55:38.240
and for you to reaffirm in yourself. Okay, yeah, I maybe

647
00:55:38.280 --> 00:55:40.960
there's some adjustments I can make maybe some things I'm doing

648
00:55:40.960 --> 00:55:43.240
or you know, I've been trying this, but I'm going to try this

649
00:55:43.240 --> 00:55:43.840
over here.

650
00:55:45.400 --> 00:55:50.960
Really looking for that profound weight that God is trying to

651
00:55:50.960 --> 00:55:52.080
invite you into.

652
00:55:53.080 --> 00:55:57.160
And I don't know, I don't know how that happens for you. I know

653
00:55:57.160 --> 00:56:00.320
how it happens for me in terms of, you know, when I just feel

654
00:56:00.640 --> 00:56:04.800
a call, whether it's just like the prayer, some people, they

655
00:56:04.800 --> 00:56:08.240
find it while they're just reading the word, sometimes

656
00:56:08.640 --> 00:56:11.840
people find it in nature, sometimes they find it in, you

657
00:56:11.840 --> 00:56:14.960
know, doing work. I don't know, it just there's all kinds of

658
00:56:14.960 --> 00:56:19.520
different ways to go about doing it. And, but I want to applaud

659
00:56:19.520 --> 00:56:24.520
I want to applaud and fan the flame of your pursuit tonight to

660
00:56:24.520 --> 00:56:31.560
find whatever that is, that's, that's calling you higher. You

661
00:56:31.560 --> 00:56:39.120
know, and continue to get the things out of your way. I'll

662
00:56:39.120 --> 00:56:43.960
tell you the top seven things that are basically keeping

663
00:56:43.960 --> 00:56:46.080
anyone back from feeling like they're not ready for

664
00:56:46.080 --> 00:56:49.280
relationships. So let me give you a list at least, you can

665
00:56:49.280 --> 00:56:51.400
write this down if you want to, or somebody can type it in the

666
00:56:51.400 --> 00:56:54.920
chat if they want to. So the first one is emotional

667
00:56:54.920 --> 00:57:00.360
readiness. You know, career lifestyle, you know, whether

668
00:57:00.360 --> 00:57:03.480
you're ready for marriage, you know, that's probably more of a

669
00:57:03.480 --> 00:57:11.200
younger man's thing. Possibly. Number one is emotional

670
00:57:11.200 --> 00:57:17.160
readiness. Number two is past experiences. So the pain

671
00:57:18.160 --> 00:57:24.600
typically of past experiences that have led you to feel a

672
00:57:24.600 --> 00:57:27.320
little like, I'm not really sure if I want to do that again.

673
00:57:28.800 --> 00:57:32.720
That kind of past experiences, unresolved issues, lingering

674
00:57:32.720 --> 00:57:37.040
fears, that kind of stuff. The third one is self awareness and

675
00:57:37.040 --> 00:57:45.880
personal growth. This is where you know, you're trying to

676
00:57:45.920 --> 00:57:49.400
understand your values, your priorities, what you are seeking

677
00:57:49.400 --> 00:57:53.280
in a partner, that kind of thing. And it can also be just

678
00:57:53.280 --> 00:57:56.760
like, you know, like, I would say Carlos right now is in a

679
00:57:56.760 --> 00:58:00.200
personal growth phase. Like he's having some breakthrough and

680
00:58:00.200 --> 00:58:03.160
some things he's like stepping up and going, okay, this is a

681
00:58:03.160 --> 00:58:05.440
really serious thing. I've always been kind of marriage

682
00:58:05.440 --> 00:58:08.680
minded, but I just realized in recent months that there's

683
00:58:08.680 --> 00:58:11.320
a level up to that. And I really had some profound

684
00:58:11.320 --> 00:58:14.440
breakthrough. And so now I'm having the season of hard work

685
00:58:14.440 --> 00:58:16.480
that I'm doing. You know, I'm saying that's a really good

686
00:58:16.480 --> 00:58:20.600
example of that. But that's not necessarily an obstacle. For

687
00:58:20.600 --> 00:58:24.800
him. That's just sort of a momentary season thing. Number

688
00:58:24.800 --> 00:58:33.200
four is the fear of change. Fear of change. I've known people

689
00:58:33.480 --> 00:58:36.680
that were said they're marriage minded. That's what they wanted

690
00:58:36.680 --> 00:58:40.560
to do. And they're pursuing for it. And they're getting they got

691
00:58:40.560 --> 00:58:42.680
in a relationship, they got engaged, and then they got

692
00:58:42.680 --> 00:58:47.920
married. And all of a sudden, they're like, complaining

693
00:58:47.960 --> 00:58:52.400
because like, well, where's my personal space? And where's my

694
00:58:52.400 --> 00:58:56.400
personal time? And where's all my thing? Like, Oh, basically,

695
00:58:56.400 --> 00:58:58.960
you didn't want to be married, just wanted you like your

696
00:58:59.320 --> 00:59:03.880
singleness. Literally, like I love, they love their

697
00:59:03.880 --> 00:59:06.640
singleness more than they really want to be married. And they

698
00:59:06.640 --> 00:59:12.360
didn't weren't honest enough to really tell themselves that.

699
00:59:12.800 --> 00:59:16.200
Or the other person before they got married, unfortunately. Now

700
00:59:16.200 --> 00:59:24.280
that person is divorced. Fear of change. Number five is pressure

701
00:59:24.280 --> 00:59:29.360
or expectations. This is where mounting societal or family

702
00:59:29.360 --> 00:59:36.000
issues or those kinds of things. And press on you to pressure you

703
00:59:36.000 --> 00:59:38.920
into something that you feel like you have to make happen

704
00:59:39.640 --> 00:59:44.280
rather than allowing it to organically happen. Number six

705
00:59:44.280 --> 00:59:49.240
is finding the right partner. Finding the right partner, the

706
00:59:49.240 --> 00:59:53.040
right person aligns with your values and goals, your life, I

707
00:59:53.040 --> 01:00:00.080
think that definitely can be a an honest, an honest reason.

708
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:03.000
that you're like, I just haven't found the right person yet.

709
01:00:03.000 --> 01:00:06.840
And I get that, but I think that can go both ways too.

710
01:00:06.840 --> 01:00:09.320
I think sometimes that can be an excuse to go,

711
01:00:12.040 --> 01:00:14.080
you know, like on a level of like,

712
01:00:14.080 --> 01:00:16.880
I'm afraid of commitment, a little avoidant attachment.

713
01:00:18.040 --> 01:00:18.880
It can be that as well.

714
01:00:18.880 --> 01:00:21.200
So it's like, oh, I haven't found the right person.

715
01:00:21.200 --> 01:00:22.040
Really?

716
01:00:22.040 --> 01:00:24.800
You had three people that were like the right person.

717
01:00:24.800 --> 01:00:29.800
Like seriously, you can't make one of those happen?

718
01:00:30.800 --> 01:00:31.680
You know, type thing.

719
01:00:31.680 --> 01:00:34.400
So it's kind of like finding the right person.

720
01:00:34.400 --> 01:00:37.800
It's like, that's not the thing.

721
01:00:37.800 --> 01:00:40.880
So you can't say that is the thing

722
01:00:40.880 --> 01:00:43.000
when you've got people lining up

723
01:00:43.000 --> 01:00:45.920
that are, you know, perfectly good candidates

724
01:00:45.920 --> 01:00:49.480
or you're unwilling to like, you know,

725
01:00:49.480 --> 01:00:52.160
pursue that type thing.

726
01:00:52.160 --> 01:00:56.200
And then the last one is timing.

727
01:00:56.200 --> 01:01:00.720
Timing, sometimes there are literally things going on

728
01:01:00.720 --> 01:01:03.840
in life, like back in the day, right?

729
01:01:03.840 --> 01:01:06.120
Like, oh, I'm going off to war.

730
01:01:06.120 --> 01:01:08.280
Yeah, that probably would be a difficult time

731
01:01:08.280 --> 01:01:09.600
to start relationship.

732
01:01:09.600 --> 01:01:11.600
You know, like, okay, I get it, right?

733
01:01:11.600 --> 01:01:13.240
Yeah, timing is up.

734
01:01:13.240 --> 01:01:14.800
Your timing's really bad right now.

735
01:01:14.800 --> 01:01:18.880
Like obviously, if you're in a critical health crisis,

736
01:01:18.880 --> 01:01:21.280
you know, and you're in a coma for like a month,

737
01:01:21.280 --> 01:01:24.240
you know, that could be a timing issue, right?

738
01:01:24.240 --> 01:01:26.560
So timing definitely could be a thing.

739
01:01:27.560 --> 01:01:29.600
Seasonal type things, I think,

740
01:01:29.600 --> 01:01:32.640
could be a thing that is happening.

741
01:01:32.640 --> 01:01:35.520
But then again, you know,

742
01:01:35.520 --> 01:01:37.360
can be an excuse maker as well.

743
01:01:38.440 --> 01:01:42.120
So I want to challenge each one of you

744
01:01:42.120 --> 01:01:45.000
to go through those seven things.

745
01:01:45.000 --> 01:01:47.760
Emotional readiness, past experiences,

746
01:01:47.760 --> 01:01:51.200
self-awareness, personal growth, fear of change,

747
01:01:52.200 --> 01:01:54.160
pressure and expectations,

748
01:01:55.480 --> 01:01:59.120
finding the right partner and timing.

749
01:02:00.320 --> 01:02:05.320
And I want you to see if there's any thing in your life

750
01:02:06.960 --> 01:02:10.880
that is coming up in those ways

751
01:02:10.880 --> 01:02:15.040
that are becoming roadblocks or preventers

752
01:02:15.040 --> 01:02:16.760
or things that are in your way

753
01:02:17.600 --> 01:02:22.600
of your preparedness or readiness for marriage.

754
01:02:23.840 --> 01:02:27.040
And then I want you to really assess, identify first,

755
01:02:27.960 --> 01:02:30.880
if anything on that list, what they are.

756
01:02:30.880 --> 01:02:34.920
And then I want you to really press into that thing

757
01:02:34.920 --> 01:02:37.600
and question everything about it.

758
01:02:39.520 --> 01:02:41.840
To start questioning it, like interrogate it.

759
01:02:43.400 --> 01:02:45.440
Like it's something that's opposing you.

760
01:02:46.760 --> 01:02:48.920
Because if something is truly opposing you

761
01:02:49.880 --> 01:02:51.960
and it's opposing you from the very thing

762
01:02:51.960 --> 01:02:55.000
that you either say is your prime objective

763
01:02:55.960 --> 01:03:00.960
or that you want or that you feel like is the best,

764
01:03:02.920 --> 01:03:07.920
then you should want to oppose the opposition, yes?

765
01:03:09.280 --> 01:03:11.120
You should want to question that.

766
01:03:11.120 --> 01:03:13.000
You should want to come against that.

767
01:03:14.120 --> 01:03:16.680
You know, we talk about in Christian culture a lot of times,

768
01:03:17.600 --> 01:03:18.440
you know, the opposing forces

769
01:03:18.440 --> 01:03:20.080
or something that's coming against you.

770
01:03:20.080 --> 01:03:22.240
Yeah, well, how about we come against that?

771
01:03:27.200 --> 01:03:29.000
You know, I've had that,

772
01:03:29.000 --> 01:03:31.600
and that's been a great spiritual lesson for me

773
01:03:31.600 --> 01:03:34.080
is to oppose the forces of darkness,

774
01:03:34.080 --> 01:03:37.600
to the power of love and the power of his word,

775
01:03:37.600 --> 01:03:40.160
the power of the blood of Jesus.

776
01:03:40.160 --> 01:03:42.880
The fact that it was not in a demonstrative way,

777
01:03:42.880 --> 01:03:46.000
not like an over, like, oh, I'm trying to build myself up

778
01:03:46.320 --> 01:03:49.200
and be like super superhero,

779
01:03:49.200 --> 01:03:52.280
like truly opposing the forces of darkness.

780
01:03:52.280 --> 01:03:53.680
You know, they can be all around me,

781
01:03:53.680 --> 01:03:55.400
but they don't have to affect me

782
01:03:56.880 --> 01:04:01.640
because I'm coming against that, you know?

783
01:04:01.640 --> 01:04:04.040
And you can take it spiritual warfare, whatever,

784
01:04:04.040 --> 01:04:05.720
or you can take it just like,

785
01:04:05.720 --> 01:04:08.280
no, I'm not really putting up with that.

786
01:04:08.280 --> 01:04:13.040
I don't want there to be such opposition to my life

787
01:04:13.040 --> 01:04:15.600
that I am being affected by it.

788
01:04:17.000 --> 01:04:19.840
You know, other than, you know,

789
01:04:19.840 --> 01:04:21.920
because I could do something about it.

790
01:04:21.920 --> 01:04:26.320
I can say, no, I can resist temptation.

791
01:04:26.320 --> 01:04:31.320
I can resist the forces that are trying to put me out

792
01:04:31.440 --> 01:04:34.800
of what, you know, what good God has for me.

793
01:04:36.640 --> 01:04:38.360
That can be very powerful, guys.

794
01:04:41.120 --> 01:04:42.400
So any questions on that?

795
01:04:43.400 --> 01:04:48.400
I want to stop pontificating tonight.

796
01:04:53.400 --> 01:04:56.200
Do you feel encouraged or challenged by any of this?

797
01:04:56.200 --> 01:04:57.760
Yeah, thank you, David.

798
01:04:57.760 --> 01:04:59.840
It goes along with what Jackie shared.

799
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:04.560
on Saturday morning, just a level of fight and prayer

800
01:05:04.560 --> 01:05:08.600
that I've been feeling that I need to step into.

801
01:05:08.600 --> 01:05:11.160
It's something that I've never really stepped into.

802
01:05:12.240 --> 01:05:13.200
So thank you.

803
01:05:15.960 --> 01:05:16.800
Yeah.

804
01:05:17.640 --> 01:05:19.200
Yeah.

805
01:05:19.200 --> 01:05:20.760
Go ahead, Mike, I'm sorry.

806
01:05:20.760 --> 01:05:22.880
No, you go first, sir, yeah.

807
01:05:22.880 --> 01:05:24.720
Well, I was just gonna say,

808
01:05:24.720 --> 01:05:29.720
one of the seven and the challenge fit my circumstance.

809
01:05:31.000 --> 01:05:32.920
That I find myself in.

810
01:05:32.920 --> 01:05:34.800
So yeah, it's challenge received.

811
01:05:34.800 --> 01:05:35.640
Thank you.

812
01:05:37.080 --> 01:05:37.920
Yeah.

813
01:05:39.400 --> 01:05:40.800
And just being, you know what?

814
01:05:40.800 --> 01:05:45.800
I mean, guys, it's not always a situation

815
01:05:51.240 --> 01:05:56.240
where we have to feel inferior either

816
01:05:56.800 --> 01:05:59.920
to what we're being challenged with

817
01:06:00.840 --> 01:06:02.960
or the circumstances, whatever.

818
01:06:02.960 --> 01:06:05.840
Most times, I just, I don't know how else to say it

819
01:06:05.840 --> 01:06:08.440
other than just being honest with God.

820
01:06:10.000 --> 01:06:12.280
And not honest, like in a confessional way,

821
01:06:12.280 --> 01:06:14.680
but just honest to say, okay, God,

822
01:06:14.680 --> 01:06:17.360
if this is really what we're doing,

823
01:06:17.360 --> 01:06:20.000
then this is what I'm needing to see.

824
01:06:20.000 --> 01:06:21.840
This is what I'm needing to understand.

825
01:06:21.840 --> 01:06:24.360
This is what I'm needing to have happen.

826
01:06:24.360 --> 01:06:25.520
This is what I'm needing.

827
01:06:25.520 --> 01:06:28.320
Like, I'm like, let's do this.

828
01:06:29.280 --> 01:06:32.640
Like, I'm on board, you know?

829
01:06:32.640 --> 01:06:33.760
But let's go.

830
01:06:34.640 --> 01:06:35.960
You know, that's kind of like a popular

831
01:06:35.960 --> 01:06:37.480
like success phrase right now.

832
01:06:37.480 --> 01:06:38.680
Let's go, you know?

833
01:06:38.680 --> 01:06:41.280
Like everybody does, like all the big success guys

834
01:06:41.280 --> 01:06:43.840
are let's do this, let's sell this, let's go,

835
01:06:43.840 --> 01:06:45.760
you know, doing all that.

836
01:06:45.760 --> 01:06:48.600
And so it's kind of like, you know,

837
01:06:48.600 --> 01:06:50.280
it's kind of like you doing that to God.

838
01:06:50.280 --> 01:06:52.240
Say, all right, God, I'm ready.

839
01:06:52.240 --> 01:06:53.560
Let's go, let's do this.

840
01:06:54.560 --> 01:06:55.720
Like, what are we doing?

841
01:06:55.720 --> 01:06:58.920
Like, how are we getting this done type thing?

842
01:06:58.920 --> 01:07:01.960
Because I want to truly step into this next season.

843
01:07:03.640 --> 01:07:04.480
Amen.

844
01:07:05.360 --> 01:07:10.360
So, I've got my wife calling me on the other phone.

845
01:07:10.840 --> 01:07:11.920
She's like, where are you?

846
01:07:11.920 --> 01:07:13.000
What are you doing?

847
01:07:13.000 --> 01:07:14.320
And I'm like, oh.

848
01:07:16.040 --> 01:07:19.240
Hey, thanks for buzzing us.

849
01:07:19.240 --> 01:07:20.600
Thanks for buzzing us.

850
01:07:22.800 --> 01:07:24.760
You know, I just, I'm going to miss you all,

851
01:07:24.760 --> 01:07:27.600
but thanks for laying it down

852
01:07:27.600 --> 01:07:30.120
and challenging us up.

853
01:07:32.120 --> 01:07:34.640
Mike, we're not, you're not going anywhere

854
01:07:34.640 --> 01:07:36.720
like that we don't, we can't know you.

855
01:07:36.720 --> 01:07:39.000
So we're going to run across.

856
01:07:39.000 --> 01:07:44.000
So I know you're moving on, but it's all right, brother.

857
01:07:45.040 --> 01:07:45.880
Yeah.

858
01:07:45.880 --> 01:07:46.720
We're connected.

859
01:07:46.720 --> 01:07:47.560
And I love you guys.

860
01:07:47.560 --> 01:07:48.640
And I wish you the best.

861
01:07:48.640 --> 01:07:49.480
I'll be praying for it.

862
01:07:49.480 --> 01:07:51.080
And Lord, may you bless.

863
01:07:51.080 --> 01:07:54.240
And just, yeah, may every man here

864
01:07:54.240 --> 01:07:56.000
that will listen to this in this group,

865
01:07:56.000 --> 01:07:57.920
flourish and find their bride.

866
01:07:57.920 --> 01:08:00.720
And maybe just bless the wedding this weekend

867
01:08:00.720 --> 01:08:02.160
and the officiation and everything

868
01:08:02.160 --> 01:08:04.760
would just go smoothly in your favor

869
01:08:04.760 --> 01:08:06.800
and fluidity would be all over it.

870
01:08:06.800 --> 01:08:10.640
And that Lord, that it would be a season of fun

871
01:08:10.640 --> 01:08:13.400
and that no more hang ups and hitches

872
01:08:13.400 --> 01:08:17.439
that it just full force forward in Jesus name.

873
01:08:17.439 --> 01:08:18.279
Amen.

874
01:08:18.600 --> 01:08:19.439
Amen.

875
01:08:20.680 --> 01:08:21.520
All right, guys.

876
01:08:21.520 --> 01:08:22.359
God bless.

877
01:08:22.359 --> 01:08:23.479
Have a great week.

878
01:08:23.479 --> 01:08:24.319
Talk to you soon.