WEBVTT

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All right, welcome everyone to Monday Night Live coaching session.

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This is for March 3rd.

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You guys, today's 3-3.

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You know, I love numbers.

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God always speaks to me through lots of different ways, and one of the ways that he speaks to

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me is through numbers.

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Can I tell you that I was traveling someplace?

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I was in my car, I was driving, and I saw, you know, I look at license plate numbers

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and just, you know, sometimes I'll notice a number and I'll be like, oh yeah, that's,

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you know, Esther 410, or that's this, or that's Esther 414, or that's, you know, Proverbs,

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you know, 1822.

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You know, I'll just see things that will remind me of the word of God, and, you know, I'll

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just grab a hold of that as, you know, the Lord is putting me into remembrance of his

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word.

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But I saw a number, and I kept seeing it.

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So that day I saw it on a license plate, and then later that day I saw it again on a different

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license plate, and I knew it wasn't a scripture in the Bible because there isn't any number

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that that's that big for a scripture, right?

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And so I was like, okay, yeah, that's, you know, something else, and I kept making a

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note in my mind that, hey, you know what, I should go look that up.

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I should research that.

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I should dig in a little bit deeper and see if that is indeed God talking to me or if

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it's just a coincidence, right?

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Is it a God wink?

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Is it God winking at me saying, hey, Jackie, pay attention, or is it just a coincidence?

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Because sometimes it's just a coincidence, you guys, but it doesn't mean that you can't

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take it as positivity, but it's not always just a divine moment or intersection with

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the Lord.

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So I put it kind of filed away to the back of my mind, and then I was at the airport

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and I was going to someplace, conference somewhere, and a girl in front of me in line on her backpack

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had that number again, and I was like, okay, this is probably not a coincidence.

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So I just Googled the number.

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I said, is there any meaning to this number, 8848, and you know what it is?

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It is the height of Mount Everest.

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It popped up immediately, and actually her bag, there's a ski brand that named itself

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after that number because Everest, right?

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There's like an outdoor brand, maybe not a ski brand, but an outdoor brand that named

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itself after that.

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And so I was like, okay, God's like, wow, that's the tippy, tippy top of Mount Everest.

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That's how high it is.

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So what's the message?

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Because I know this girl ain't climbing that mountain, all right?

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I'm not.

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Do you guys know that they actually mark the route to the top by like places where people

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have died?

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It's like, oh, there's yellow ski hat guy, and there's blue ski boots guy, and then there's

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like, oh, I'm sorry.

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If your marker's on the way to the top or people that have died trying, I'm probably

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not going to do it.

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But anyway, I just, you know, it's like, Lord, you know what?

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What's the message?

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And so you got to press in for the message.

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Even if you know God's winking at you, sometimes the message is not just self-explanatory.

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It doesn't have to be one faceted, it can be more than one facet.

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And so push in, press in, that's your invitation to come and seek.

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You know, the Bible says that it's God's what?

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It's his pleasure to hide things, and it's the pleasure of us kings to seek it out, right?

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We're kings, and we're priests.

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If you prefer gender appropriateness, then we're queens, and we're priestesses, I don't

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know.

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But you have to understand, God, while he does have a lot of respect for the divine

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masculine and feminine, he saw that Adam wasn't good without the counterpart.

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It wasn't a finished or complete creation without Eve.

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At the same time, being the bride of Christ, being the sons of God, a lot of that's very

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interchangeable in the word, right?

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God doesn't love the masculine more than he loves the feminine.

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And so if that's something that you've been believing, then guess what?

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This is your invitation to let go of that lie, because God absolutely loves the feminine.

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In fact, did you know that in the Bible, there's a word that describes you as a wife and as

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a partner?

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And it actually means warrior.

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It actually means coming kind of to the rescue in a way, and it's the word Eve.

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And it's used 21 times in the word of God and 19 of those times it's used for God coming

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as the rescue, okay, as the champion, as the warrior.

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And then twice it's used for us, for women.

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And so I think that that kind of shows you what God thinks of the feminine, right?

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We're strong, we're soft, but we're strong.

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We're gentle, we're humble, but we're also strong.

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We can be fierce if we need to be in the right ways.

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And so that is what your divine masculine counterpart that's out there somewhere is

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looking for.

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He's looking for that version of you.

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He's looking for someone who can partner with him, with his masculine, and you guys can

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change your lineage and legacy.

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So this is being recorded and I also taught this morning.

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So you can listen to that.

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It's going to be a completely different session this morning than it is tonight.

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I've been drinking this Ollipop.

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I don't know if this is good for you or not, you guys, but my kids got me on this.

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It's probably halfway good for you.

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Okay.

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Maybe halfway good.

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All right.

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So Bethany left me a lot of notes, but I'm going to go rogue and just do whatever Holy

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Spirit does.

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How about that?

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That's what I want to do tonight.

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And then she's got some great notes and she'll teach you that next week on Monday when she

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comes back around.

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So the very first thing that I want to do is I want to find out who you guys are.

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Like I see your names, but like what, what week of the heart work are you in?

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One, two, three, four, or five.

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Put that in the chat.

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Let me see who is here and where you are in the material.

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All right.

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We have week two.

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So Kathy's understanding her heart there in week two, finding out, hey, where does all

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this stuff come from?

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Week four and Denise and Sarah are both on.

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And so is Pat on week four, which is the forgiveness week.

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You guys give yourself a lot of grace and space for that week, right?

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You might not be able to get it done in a week and that's fine.

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You want to make sure that you are not mailing that in.

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Stephanie's also week two.

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That's the understanding the heart week.

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Liza is in week three.

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And so is Amanda.

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And that's the confession week, repentance and confession.

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That's a really good one.

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I think that the coaching Bethany was going to do tonight was more geared towards James

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516, which is confession.

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Laura Rio joy, both in the forgiveness week, just as in week two as well, Stacy's in week

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five.

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So she is completing her heart work.

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She's in the real you starting to take a look at what is the authentic her look like outside

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of all of this trauma.

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That's going to be great.

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Kathy's in week five as well.

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Jody's in week one.

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Welcome.

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Alina is in week one.

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That is the supernatural surrender week.

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Everything that you do in heart work is going to be based on you really giving God permission

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to be meddling around in those heart boxes.

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And so that permission slip is really important.

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If you have to revisit that every single day, yes, you are going to feel some fields to

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heal some fields.

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There's going to be some distractions and some disruptions.

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You guys, I don't warn you about what's going to happen when you start the heart work.

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I don't.

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That list didn't just come out of nowhere.

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It came out of what I've seen people go through and what I went through when I first started

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doing the heart work.

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I was the heart works first student.

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God gave me the heart work.

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He downloaded this information to me when I was a young believer and he has built on

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it over the years and I've been teaching it for a really long time to other people.

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But it set me free first and it was a process and it was layer upon layer upon layer.

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And I will tell you that the stuff that I've compiled in that what to expect video is stuff

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that really happens.

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It's the real deal.

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You can expect distractions and disruptions.

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You can expect to just be like, eh, this isn't going to change anything.

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I think I'm just going to give up.

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You can expect to be offended.

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You can expect anything and everything trying to keep you from moving forward with this

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and really digging in, really digging in.

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You can expect, you know, negative feelings.

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You can expect some positive feelings.

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You can expect the dreams.

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You can expect the visions.

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You can expect daydreams as far as like sitting around and imagining what your future can

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look like more than you ever have before.

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You can expect all of those things because that's what happens when people start to do

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the heart work.

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Have you ever like started working at a new job and they give you a handbook and it's

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full of rules about what you can and can't do at work?

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Well, those rules didn't just come out of nowhere.

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They came out of someone doing that at work.

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Okay.

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One time I had a handbook that said no evening wear a prom dress.

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at work like don't like under the dress code no prom dresses I was like what

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someone apparently probably more than one someone wore some kind of evening

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wear to work and that became a rule and so same thing with those those

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guidelines of heart work they're there for a reason all right so we have Lolita

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is in week three that's the confession week so is Karen Michelle's in week five

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Brenda's in week three Sarah's almost done with week three we have Sue in week

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two Karis is in week five just you guys know those of you that are about to

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graduate to phase two don't be in a hurry and make sure that you're really

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giving that week five everything because that is setting the stage for what's

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coming next and then you'll learn about boundaries in phase two so you can

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protect that real you guys it's not enough to really know how God created us

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and to get free from all this trauma response and these trauma identities

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it's also important that we have the tools to protect that real us and not

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just go right back to where we started from underneath all kinds of layers of

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people-pleasing and you know self-defense and preservation techniques

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we don't want to do that so it's important that we learn those boundaries

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and we think that we're valuable enough to really protect that authentic

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identity that God is revealing Sylvia's in week two Joanne one one three

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Jennifer's in one welcome all of you that are new supernatural surrender once

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again make sure that you are not mailing it in do not mail it in that's gonna be

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really important all right thank you for letting me know where you guys are

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all right so it seems like most of you a handful of you are in week one and two

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but most of you are a week three to five in this group right here all right so

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week one and two very important laying a foundation setting the stage giving

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surrender and permission don't forget to make your Jesus cares board everyone in

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here should have a Jesus cares board that is a supernatural activation

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whatever you put on there you are releasing prophetically to God and he

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knows it and you know it and you're gonna feel a lot less stressed out

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you're gonna really believe that you have given that to God and it is now his

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problem and not yours and guess what he doesn't have any problems all right if

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he needs your help with something he'll let you know in the meantime you're just

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releasing it okay now you can't release cleaning your house to the Lord okay

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you're single and you're the only breadwinner right now in your family so

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you can't release going to work to the Lord so but I put it on my Jesus cares

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board and you know I'm just gonna let him handle it I'm gonna sit here and in

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my jammies and do my thing no there are some things that you're gonna have to

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continue to do and you are going to trust the Lord that if that's something

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you really don't want to be doing that put that on your Jesus cares board say

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God I need a new job in fact I don't want a job I want an assignment I want a

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vocation I want a purpose put that on your Jesus cares board let him start

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taking care of that all right that's how you do that all right so for if

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you're in week one and two you should be making those all the rest of you should

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already have it be using it because if you work it it works right so I'm gonna

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just repeat what I said to the first session today there's a lot of

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distraction specifically offense comes in tries to get us and I don't mean like

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you get offended in this program but you just get offended in life right you

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just get into a place where you're offended you don't think anything's ever

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gonna change you get a bad attitude and then you stop trying to progress you

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kind of quit the things that are meant to help move you forward and I can tell

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you without exception I have failed at a hundred percent of the things that I

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have signed up for and not shown up for

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and God in his grace and mercy always brings that opportunity back around but

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you guys I pray over those things on my Jesus cares board and then opportunities

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show up to solve those problems don't they but a lot of times those

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opportunities and the people that are carrying those opportunities or those

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solutions they don't look like what we expect and so we might either ignore it

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or push it away be like yeah

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Oh, that can't be the, that can't be the solution.

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That's too easy, or that's too hard, or I don't like that person or

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whatever it is that comes along.

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And then if we get far enough past our own, you know, objections, if we get

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far enough to actually sign up, a lot of times, if we don't have

234
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immediate breakthrough, we quit.

235
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And we just say, oh, that doesn't work.

236
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Isn't that what we say?

237
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Your functional doctor says, hey, how's that supplement working?

238
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You're like, oh yeah, it didn't work for me.

239
00:15:33.280 --> 00:15:33.680
Oh, really?

240
00:15:33.680 --> 00:15:34.640
How long did you take it?

241
00:15:34.880 --> 00:15:35.920
Oh, two weeks.

242
00:15:36.840 --> 00:15:38.320
That's not how it works.

243
00:15:39.400 --> 00:15:40.840
You got to have consistency.

244
00:15:43.080 --> 00:15:44.320
You got to have discipline.

245
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Right?

246
00:15:47.680 --> 00:15:51.240
God leads us to water, but he cannot make us drink.

247
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He can't.

248
00:15:54.840 --> 00:15:57.800
I remember when I was a young believer, I was thrown into leadership

249
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before I had a lot of character.

250
00:16:00.240 --> 00:16:01.400
I think it's because I have a big mouth.

251
00:16:01.400 --> 00:16:03.240
They're like, she can talk, make her a leader.

252
00:16:03.800 --> 00:16:05.200
So I met Jesus.

253
00:16:05.240 --> 00:16:07.120
They immediately thrust me into leadership.

254
00:16:07.120 --> 00:16:08.160
I'm 22 years old.

255
00:16:08.160 --> 00:16:09.360
I don't know really a lot.

256
00:16:09.840 --> 00:16:10.240
Okay.

257
00:16:10.240 --> 00:16:13.240
But I'm willing to, you know, fake it until I make it, I guess.

258
00:16:13.640 --> 00:16:17.120
And I really, really wanted people to have breakthrough.

259
00:16:17.200 --> 00:16:19.720
Like I really wanted it so much.

260
00:16:20.040 --> 00:16:23.720
And a lot of times I wanted it more for people than they actually wanted it

261
00:16:23.720 --> 00:16:24.560
for themselves.

262
00:16:26.280 --> 00:16:30.920
And so I ended up becoming a social worker and you guys, I have a, I had a

263
00:16:30.920 --> 00:16:34.440
very overextended mercy gift and helper gift.

264
00:16:34.840 --> 00:16:35.520
And what does that mean?

265
00:16:35.520 --> 00:16:40.080
That means God gives us gifts, but if we don't have that gift in the right

266
00:16:40.080 --> 00:16:44.240
context of identity, like he's the source and we're just a resource, those

267
00:16:44.240 --> 00:16:48.400
gifts become overextended by our trauma personalities, and then they become

268
00:16:48.400 --> 00:16:49.080
weaknesses.

269
00:16:49.560 --> 00:16:51.720
A lot of you are amazing helpers.

270
00:16:51.840 --> 00:16:55.400
You have all kinds of wisdom and information to give, but you're also

271
00:16:55.400 --> 00:16:57.160
people pleasers because of trauma.

272
00:16:57.760 --> 00:17:02.520
If you have a helping gift and a people pleasing personality, that's going to

273
00:17:02.520 --> 00:17:04.079
burn you out and ruin your life.

274
00:17:05.040 --> 00:17:08.000
It's going to burn you out and ruin your life.

275
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And that's exactly what the opposing forces want, right?

276
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What better way to destroy you than by serving God?

277
00:17:17.920 --> 00:17:21.200
I'm going to tell you, if you have an orphan identity or you're just trying

278
00:17:21.200 --> 00:17:26.400
to get significance or earn your keep by your good works, the church model, the

279
00:17:26.400 --> 00:17:30.040
religious model loves orphans because they serve with no boundaries.

280
00:17:32.360 --> 00:17:34.800
Oh, sister Lolita, can you run this this week?

281
00:17:35.080 --> 00:17:36.280
Oh yeah, yeah, I can do it.

282
00:17:36.520 --> 00:17:36.840
Okay.

283
00:17:36.840 --> 00:17:38.120
What about this next week?

284
00:17:38.120 --> 00:17:38.960
Yeah, I can do it.

285
00:17:39.160 --> 00:17:41.080
Well, what about twice on Sunday?

286
00:17:41.080 --> 00:17:42.160
Oh yeah, I can do it.

287
00:17:42.600 --> 00:17:44.200
No, no, you can't.

288
00:17:44.960 --> 00:17:45.640
And you shouldn't.

289
00:17:48.240 --> 00:17:51.160
I'm just using, I'm just pulling people out of the crowd.

290
00:17:51.400 --> 00:17:51.720
Okay.

291
00:17:51.720 --> 00:17:53.600
But if the shoe fits, tie it up and wear it.

292
00:17:53.640 --> 00:17:56.360
Because the bottom line is, is God wants to get us free.

293
00:17:56.360 --> 00:18:00.000
He wants to understand that our gifts are beautiful, but they're not beautiful when

294
00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:02.920
they're overextended by trauma personalities and trauma identities.

295
00:18:03.120 --> 00:18:07.480
And that's why God wants to heal that so that we can start using those gifts again

296
00:18:07.520 --> 00:18:13.520
with, without, without it causing us hurt and pain.

297
00:18:13.800 --> 00:18:18.880
The gifts God has given you to serve the world and to bring attention and make him

298
00:18:18.880 --> 00:18:21.080
famous in the earth, because what does the Bible say?

299
00:18:21.080 --> 00:18:24.800
It says, and they'll see your good works and they'll glorify your father in heaven.

300
00:18:24.800 --> 00:18:25.240
Right?

301
00:18:27.640 --> 00:18:33.200
And so it's important that we understand that God wants you to just thrive with the

302
00:18:33.200 --> 00:18:34.280
things that he's given you.

303
00:18:34.880 --> 00:18:38.200
But if the things that he's given you, you're using incorrectly because of

304
00:18:38.680 --> 00:18:44.160
something like what I'm talking about, a people pleasing situation, um, then it's

305
00:18:44.160 --> 00:18:45.360
going to hurt you and not help you.

306
00:18:45.760 --> 00:18:51.320
So anyway, I'm helping people and you guys, I'm helping till it literally hurts,

307
00:18:51.720 --> 00:18:55.080
literally hurts me and hurts them.

308
00:18:56.240 --> 00:19:01.280
I'm enabling, I'm just the hot mess express, but my heart's in the right place.

309
00:19:02.120 --> 00:19:04.800
I don't know that I'm, I don't know that I'm overhelping.

310
00:19:05.160 --> 00:19:09.320
I'm just trying to be a good Christian because I don't have a lot of discipleship

311
00:19:09.320 --> 00:19:09.680
yet.

312
00:19:10.680 --> 00:19:15.640
And so God took me aside and here's the moral to this whole sidebar, this whole

313
00:19:15.640 --> 00:19:16.360
rabbit trail.

314
00:19:16.360 --> 00:19:17.560
Here's the moral to the story.

315
00:19:18.160 --> 00:19:23.280
God took me aside and he said, Hey Jackie, he said, you know, I've created you to be

316
00:19:23.280 --> 00:19:23.920
a teacher.

317
00:19:24.920 --> 00:19:27.400
He said, what's your responsibility as a teacher?

318
00:19:27.760 --> 00:19:30.680
I said to speak the truth in love.

319
00:19:31.480 --> 00:19:36.680
And he said, yes, he said, and then after you speak the truth in love, what is your

320
00:19:36.680 --> 00:19:37.640
responsibility?

321
00:19:38.560 --> 00:19:41.440
And then I said, you know, to help them receive it.

322
00:19:41.440 --> 00:19:46.400
He's like, no, that's not your responsibility.

323
00:19:47.000 --> 00:19:51.520
He said, let me give you a refresher on this.

324
00:19:51.680 --> 00:19:54.480
He said, your job is to release the truth.

325
00:19:55.000 --> 00:19:58.520
He said, and then after that, he said, your job is over.

326
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:01.840
And I said, oh, okay.

327
00:20:01.840 --> 00:20:04.680
And he said, because this is what you're doing.

328
00:20:04.680 --> 00:20:07.600
He said, you're leading them to water,

329
00:20:07.600 --> 00:20:10.520
but you're not letting them make the decision to drink.

330
00:20:10.520 --> 00:20:13.000
He said, your attitude is, well, you know,

331
00:20:13.000 --> 00:20:14.760
maybe I'll just push their head under a little

332
00:20:14.760 --> 00:20:17.360
and then they'll either drink or they'll drown.

333
00:20:17.360 --> 00:20:20.440
In love, that's what I'll do.

334
00:20:20.440 --> 00:20:23.480
And that's exactly what I was doing, you guys.

335
00:20:23.480 --> 00:20:27.160
I was continually helping and helping and helping

336
00:20:27.240 --> 00:20:30.280
and helping and helping until it hurt.

337
00:20:30.280 --> 00:20:31.640
Once again, it was hurting them

338
00:20:31.640 --> 00:20:34.240
because they were not learning how to go to God on their own

339
00:20:34.240 --> 00:20:36.440
and it was also hurting me because I was getting burnout.

340
00:20:36.440 --> 00:20:39.440
So I haven't, I don't know that I've ever told that story

341
00:20:39.440 --> 00:20:41.040
in all my years of coaching.

342
00:20:41.040 --> 00:20:44.480
And so that must be for someone here or someone in replay.

343
00:20:44.480 --> 00:20:47.280
And so once again, if that shoe fits,

344
00:20:47.280 --> 00:20:49.080
make sure that you're saying, ooh,

345
00:20:49.080 --> 00:20:50.320
and you're going to God and saying,

346
00:20:50.320 --> 00:20:52.160
hey, I don't want to do that anymore.

347
00:20:52.160 --> 00:20:55.040
My responsibility is to lead people to the truth.

348
00:20:55.040 --> 00:20:57.280
What they do with it is none of my business.

349
00:20:58.120 --> 00:21:00.400
That's where my responsibility ends.

350
00:21:00.400 --> 00:21:02.280
All right, cool.

351
00:21:02.280 --> 00:21:03.680
All right, so I saw some people say,

352
00:21:03.680 --> 00:21:05.600
hey, I was really hoping to confess tonight.

353
00:21:05.600 --> 00:21:06.800
And so we can do some of that.

354
00:21:06.800 --> 00:21:07.960
And you guys, we're going to take Q&A.

355
00:21:07.960 --> 00:21:09.480
You can ask questions about heart work,

356
00:21:09.480 --> 00:21:12.280
one, two, three, four, five, anything that you're stuck in.

357
00:21:12.280 --> 00:21:14.240
Remember, we're never stuck on the outside.

358
00:21:14.240 --> 00:21:16.720
We're only stuck on the inside, right?

359
00:21:16.720 --> 00:21:18.880
And so we can do any and all of that.

360
00:21:18.880 --> 00:21:20.680
Who wants to go first?

361
00:21:22.120 --> 00:21:24.440
Who wants any question, anything?

362
00:21:24.440 --> 00:21:25.880
This is just a coaching session.

363
00:21:25.880 --> 00:21:29.920
So I'll let you guys ask what you want.

364
00:21:36.160 --> 00:21:37.120
Go ahead, Sarah.

365
00:21:40.080 --> 00:21:40.960
Hi, Jackie.

366
00:21:40.960 --> 00:21:44.640
It's so nice to have you subbing here and have you with us.

367
00:21:44.640 --> 00:21:45.560
Yay, thank you.

368
00:21:45.560 --> 00:21:46.400
I love it.

369
00:21:46.400 --> 00:21:47.240
I'm glad to be here.

370
00:21:48.320 --> 00:21:50.320
So I have a question.

371
00:21:50.320 --> 00:21:55.320
I feel like I struggle with comparison

372
00:21:55.560 --> 00:21:59.080
and just feeling like I'm not good enough

373
00:21:59.080 --> 00:22:01.000
when let's say I'm interested in somebody.

374
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:03.000
And then all of a sudden all these thoughts

375
00:22:03.000 --> 00:22:05.240
start just coming to my mind,

376
00:22:05.240 --> 00:22:08.240
like, oh, that person over there is better for him.

377
00:22:08.240 --> 00:22:11.520
He should want to be with her or this person.

378
00:22:11.520 --> 00:22:13.200
And then I start feeling insecure

379
00:22:13.200 --> 00:22:18.200
and I start feeling just like I'm not good enough,

380
00:22:18.680 --> 00:22:19.680
like period, you know?

381
00:22:20.000 --> 00:22:22.480
And I'm sure I know in your book

382
00:22:22.480 --> 00:22:25.960
that you talk a lot about replacing those lies with truth

383
00:22:25.960 --> 00:22:26.800
and all of that.

384
00:22:26.800 --> 00:22:28.240
So maybe I'm not doing enough of it.

385
00:22:28.240 --> 00:22:32.480
And, but I just, you know, I really struggle with that

386
00:22:32.480 --> 00:22:34.960
with just feeling like when I start being interested

387
00:22:34.960 --> 00:22:37.120
in somebody, I just think, well,

388
00:22:37.120 --> 00:22:39.600
everybody else is better for him than me.

389
00:22:41.480 --> 00:22:42.920
Okay, and let me ask you a question.

390
00:22:42.920 --> 00:22:46.160
Are you actually, when you're saying everybody's better

391
00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:47.680
for this person than you,

392
00:22:47.680 --> 00:22:50.800
are you actually like thinking of specific people

393
00:22:50.800 --> 00:22:51.800
that you know?

394
00:22:53.440 --> 00:22:58.440
I think it's more just like, like, well, so maybe like,

395
00:22:58.760 --> 00:23:01.880
so I want to have a child and I'm in my early forties.

396
00:23:01.880 --> 00:23:03.720
And so I'm thinking, well, maybe he'd be better off

397
00:23:03.720 --> 00:23:05.840
with this other person who's younger,

398
00:23:05.840 --> 00:23:09.360
who could more easily probably give him a child

399
00:23:09.360 --> 00:23:13.480
or I'm thinking, well, he probably would connect better

400
00:23:13.480 --> 00:23:15.960
with this other person because of this thing, this,

401
00:23:15.960 --> 00:23:16.800
you know, maybe he can have-

402
00:23:17.200 --> 00:23:19.480
They're actual people that you're thinking of?

403
00:23:19.480 --> 00:23:20.400
Okay. Yeah.

404
00:23:20.400 --> 00:23:22.080
Other single people?

405
00:23:22.080 --> 00:23:23.440
Yes. Okay, okay.

406
00:23:23.440 --> 00:23:25.120
All right, so two things.

407
00:23:25.120 --> 00:23:26.080
First of all, you guys,

408
00:23:26.080 --> 00:23:28.760
when you actually get into a relationship with someone,

409
00:23:28.760 --> 00:23:30.400
a lot of people, believe it or not,

410
00:23:30.400 --> 00:23:33.760
they actually do what Sarah's talking about right now.

411
00:23:33.760 --> 00:23:37.760
You know, it's part of avoidant attachment,

412
00:23:37.760 --> 00:23:39.960
anxious avoidant, usually disordered attachment.

413
00:23:39.960 --> 00:23:42.080
You'll learn more about that in phase two

414
00:23:42.080 --> 00:23:44.040
and you'll find out, like, you'll take a quiz,

415
00:23:44.040 --> 00:23:45.720
you'll find out where you kind of fall

416
00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:48.280
in the whole spectrum of attachment style.

417
00:23:48.280 --> 00:23:51.680
But the bottom line is, is that that is just a way

418
00:23:51.680 --> 00:23:56.680
of not having to let someone in, right?

419
00:23:56.720 --> 00:23:59.640
Oh, if someone else is always better for this person,

420
00:23:59.640 --> 00:24:01.320
then I don't actually have to go deeper

421
00:24:01.320 --> 00:24:03.080
in relationship with them.

422
00:24:03.080 --> 00:24:05.880
I don't have to ever disappoint them, right?

423
00:24:05.880 --> 00:24:09.760
I don't ever have to, you know, have them, you know,

424
00:24:09.760 --> 00:24:12.480
wish that they had been with someone else besides me.

425
00:24:12.480 --> 00:24:14.440
These are the fears, right?

426
00:24:14.480 --> 00:24:16.960
That when they get in relationship with me,

427
00:24:16.960 --> 00:24:19.440
they're gonna wish that they had chosen someone else.

428
00:24:19.440 --> 00:24:21.200
And so, Sarah, it's important for you

429
00:24:21.200 --> 00:24:23.960
to really ask yourself, when was the first time

430
00:24:23.960 --> 00:24:26.880
that I really felt like, or saw,

431
00:24:26.880 --> 00:24:28.680
maybe it wasn't even just felt like,

432
00:24:28.680 --> 00:24:32.480
but actual, you know, experienced other people

433
00:24:32.480 --> 00:24:34.680
being chosen instead of you?

434
00:24:34.680 --> 00:24:36.720
Whether it was for kickball teams

435
00:24:36.720 --> 00:24:41.440
or whether it was for parts in plays or, you know, choir,

436
00:24:41.440 --> 00:24:42.880
or whether it was in your family

437
00:24:42.920 --> 00:24:45.280
where there was a sibling that was favored.

438
00:24:45.280 --> 00:24:48.560
You know, there's gotta be somewhere in your history

439
00:24:48.560 --> 00:24:52.200
where you got the idea that you were, you know,

440
00:24:52.200 --> 00:24:54.240
second, maybe even third best.

441
00:24:55.560 --> 00:24:56.400
Okay.

442
00:24:57.320 --> 00:24:58.760
You know?

443
00:24:58.760 --> 00:25:00.640
And definitely some things are coming.

444
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:09.340
to mine, but well, well, one in particular would have been in my junior year of high

445
00:25:09.340 --> 00:25:17.140
school when a boy I really liked asked me to the dance, the formal, and I was feeling

446
00:25:17.140 --> 00:25:20.260
very insecure about my hair and my dress and everything.

447
00:25:20.260 --> 00:25:27.240
I was feeling very secure, insecure about, and then the night of, it was like he picked

448
00:25:27.240 --> 00:25:31.640
me up and we went with two other friends and then he ditched me.

449
00:25:31.640 --> 00:25:37.080
He literally was like, left me to be with this other girl.

450
00:25:37.080 --> 00:25:42.840
And Sarah was not Tim's date anymore that night until the drive home.

451
00:25:42.840 --> 00:25:47.560
And it was so awkward and you could have like cut the tension with a knife in the car.

452
00:25:47.560 --> 00:25:48.560
And it was so hurtful.

453
00:25:48.560 --> 00:25:52.280
And I literally had to get saved like 20 times after that, cause I was so angry.

454
00:25:52.280 --> 00:25:55.000
We went to the same school, Christian school.

455
00:25:55.840 --> 00:25:56.840
It was very hard.

456
00:25:56.840 --> 00:26:01.360
Did you say anything to him on the way home about it?

457
00:26:01.360 --> 00:26:03.320
No, no.

458
00:26:03.320 --> 00:26:07.600
And I was probably very like, um, passive aggressive.

459
00:26:07.600 --> 00:26:14.320
Like then there on for the next year, it was, yeah, it was really hurtful and I didn't know

460
00:26:14.320 --> 00:26:18.600
how to, and I didn't, you know, actually end up dating that other girl.

461
00:26:18.600 --> 00:26:23.960
No, no, they were good friends, but they just were flirting, flirting that night.

462
00:26:24.480 --> 00:26:25.480
Terribly.

463
00:26:25.480 --> 00:26:26.480
Yeah.

464
00:26:26.480 --> 00:26:27.480
Got it.

465
00:26:27.480 --> 00:26:28.480
Okay.

466
00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:34.080
So that definitely, and here's something that I told the morning session, um, that when

467
00:26:34.080 --> 00:26:39.440
it comes to traumas, we can have real big traumas that are just obviously something

468
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:41.160
that really hurt us in life.

469
00:26:41.160 --> 00:26:46.040
Like your parent died when you were a kid or you were abused in some way.

470
00:26:46.040 --> 00:26:47.040
I get it.

471
00:26:47.040 --> 00:26:48.920
Your husband cheated on you, something like that.

472
00:26:48.920 --> 00:26:52.160
But then there are other things like what Sarah's talking about that a lot of people

473
00:26:52.160 --> 00:26:53.920
just be like, Oh, whatever.

474
00:26:53.920 --> 00:26:55.080
That's just part of growing up.

475
00:26:55.080 --> 00:26:57.280
No, it can be very traumatic.

476
00:26:57.280 --> 00:27:02.920
It can send a message that we actually internalize and it affects us the rest of our lives.

477
00:27:02.920 --> 00:27:03.920
Yeah.

478
00:27:03.920 --> 00:27:04.920
Yeah.

479
00:27:04.920 --> 00:27:07.400
And you're, by the way, you're lovely.

480
00:27:07.400 --> 00:27:08.800
So thank you.

481
00:27:08.800 --> 00:27:09.800
Yes.

482
00:27:09.800 --> 00:27:13.500
And so, and I'm sure that you were lovely when you were in high school as well.

483
00:27:13.500 --> 00:27:20.760
And so here's the thing about boys and the thing about men, because both men are boys

484
00:27:20.760 --> 00:27:21.760
inside.

485
00:27:22.360 --> 00:27:26.640
It's important that we remember this and they don't really change in this way, but men have

486
00:27:26.640 --> 00:27:34.360
a tendency to enjoy the company of women that are confident and also enjoy the company of

487
00:27:34.360 --> 00:27:38.280
women that make them feel good about themselves.

488
00:27:38.280 --> 00:27:39.580
Okay.

489
00:27:39.580 --> 00:27:43.600
And I'm not saying that we need to fake that with guys, but if we're the kind of women

490
00:27:43.600 --> 00:27:45.640
and I'm not, this is not directed towards Sarah.

491
00:27:45.640 --> 00:27:47.360
This is just a coaching moment.

492
00:27:47.360 --> 00:27:52.480
All of you should be on a dating sabbatical, but if you feel like you have a critical heart

493
00:27:52.480 --> 00:27:57.380
towards men, because you've really been done wrong, you're going to want to let God heal

494
00:27:57.380 --> 00:28:02.480
you of that here in phase one, because when you get into the dating phase, men can smell

495
00:28:02.480 --> 00:28:08.400
that a thousand miles away and you will not be popular with the boys.

496
00:28:08.400 --> 00:28:09.400
Okay.

497
00:28:09.400 --> 00:28:15.280
Because men have enough on their plate than to have a woman who's critical and unhappy

498
00:28:15.280 --> 00:28:17.240
and hard to please.

499
00:28:17.240 --> 00:28:18.240
Right.

500
00:28:18.240 --> 00:28:24.000
So, and I'm not saying that men are perfect or they're good or that we shouldn't, you

501
00:28:24.000 --> 00:28:28.200
know, help people to become better versions of themselves within relationship.

502
00:28:28.200 --> 00:28:33.240
You know, when we're, you know, really seriously exclusive and dating towards marriage, we

503
00:28:33.240 --> 00:28:41.480
can begin to lovingly bring some, you know, advice to some situations that maybe they're

504
00:28:41.480 --> 00:28:44.560
having in their lives because that's what a good woman does.

505
00:28:44.560 --> 00:28:45.560
They're full of wisdom.

506
00:28:45.560 --> 00:28:49.480
Did you know that wisdom is described as feminine in the Bible?

507
00:28:49.480 --> 00:28:52.560
And so it's important that we remember that and understand that we have a lot of wisdom

508
00:28:52.560 --> 00:28:55.880
that we're carrying, a lot of discernment, a lot of intuition.

509
00:28:55.880 --> 00:28:57.160
That's important stuff.

510
00:28:57.160 --> 00:29:02.600
But in the get to know you stages, if you have a hard heart, if you're bitter because

511
00:29:02.600 --> 00:29:07.480
of things that have happened, I have a private client right now who can't get a date to save

512
00:29:07.480 --> 00:29:08.480
her life.

513
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:12.880
And the reason why is because she secretly doesn't like men that much.

514
00:29:12.880 --> 00:29:13.880
Not that she likes women.

515
00:29:13.880 --> 00:29:15.560
It's not that kind of thing.

516
00:29:15.560 --> 00:29:19.560
But it's like she just doesn't think highly of the male species.

517
00:29:19.560 --> 00:29:20.560
She doesn't.

518
00:29:20.560 --> 00:29:22.080
And you know what happens then?

519
00:29:22.080 --> 00:29:25.900
It's like you're saying to yourself, okay, I think all men are pretty much the same and

520
00:29:25.900 --> 00:29:27.280
that's not a good thing.

521
00:29:27.280 --> 00:29:32.440
But I'm going to find the one man, the needle in the haystack that I can actually trust

522
00:29:32.440 --> 00:29:35.560
that actually I'm going to find the one good one that's out there.

523
00:29:35.560 --> 00:29:40.320
Well, you're not because what you believe about men is going to be a self-fulfilling

524
00:29:40.320 --> 00:29:42.080
prophecy.

525
00:29:42.080 --> 00:29:44.200
And so we got to make sure that we're unpacking that.

526
00:29:44.200 --> 00:29:46.080
So Sarah was unpacking that.

527
00:29:46.080 --> 00:29:47.080
She was really angry.

528
00:29:47.080 --> 00:29:50.720
You guys, anger is hurt and fear is bodyguard.

529
00:29:50.720 --> 00:29:54.920
When we're angry, we're usually just hurt or afraid.

530
00:29:54.920 --> 00:29:59.520
And so if you're ever angry about anything, make sure that you stop and say, and that

531
00:29:59.520 --> 00:30:00.040
includes friends.

532
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:03.120
Frustration, okay, all the aspects,

533
00:30:03.120 --> 00:30:07.000
all the spectrum of anger, all right?

534
00:30:07.000 --> 00:30:09.480
When that happens, make sure that you stop

535
00:30:09.480 --> 00:30:11.000
and use your heart work tools and you say,

536
00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:14.440
okay, I'm feeling a lot of anger right now,

537
00:30:14.440 --> 00:30:16.640
I'm feeling a lot of rage maybe even,

538
00:30:16.640 --> 00:30:18.900
I'm feeling a lot of frustration right now.

539
00:30:19.920 --> 00:30:24.800
What am I afraid of or what inside of me

540
00:30:24.800 --> 00:30:29.400
that is not healed is crying out right now?

541
00:30:29.440 --> 00:30:32.120
What is hurting, where am I hurt?

542
00:30:32.120 --> 00:30:34.680
Important that you do that and if you do that,

543
00:30:34.680 --> 00:30:36.580
anger will tell you its real name.

544
00:30:38.560 --> 00:30:41.480
You will find out that it's really just

545
00:30:41.480 --> 00:30:44.760
fear of abandonment or rejection or it's,

546
00:30:44.760 --> 00:30:46.640
you know, you're being triggered in this place

547
00:30:46.640 --> 00:30:49.400
that is not healed yet and this situation

548
00:30:49.400 --> 00:30:51.240
is bringing it back to the surface.

549
00:30:52.240 --> 00:30:55.400
You know, it's grief, it's all different types of things.

550
00:30:55.400 --> 00:30:56.320
Stacey, you're up.

551
00:30:57.000 --> 00:30:58.280
Hey, Jackie.

552
00:30:58.280 --> 00:31:03.280
Hi, so I had it on my heart for confession tonight

553
00:31:04.680 --> 00:31:07.600
so I'm glad you brought that up.

554
00:31:07.600 --> 00:31:11.880
So, one of the things that the Lord highlighted for me

555
00:31:11.880 --> 00:31:15.680
to confess was back in the day, like in my early 20s,

556
00:31:17.040 --> 00:31:19.600
I was out and about like at a bar

557
00:31:19.600 --> 00:31:24.080
and I had been drinking and I wasn't drinking

558
00:31:24.640 --> 00:31:27.680
and I have been drinking and I wasn't drunk by any means

559
00:31:27.680 --> 00:31:31.480
but, and I can't remember what actually happened

560
00:31:31.480 --> 00:31:33.920
but I got upset for some reason

561
00:31:33.920 --> 00:31:38.920
and then ended up leaving the bar and drove home

562
00:31:40.060 --> 00:31:45.060
and I, with my car, like ran into the mirror

563
00:31:50.080 --> 00:31:53.100
on somebody's car and kind of like broke off the mirror.

564
00:31:54.080 --> 00:31:55.160
Oh, no.

565
00:31:55.160 --> 00:31:57.760
Yeah, and I was so afraid of, you know,

566
00:31:57.760 --> 00:32:01.040
that I would like be caught and, you know,

567
00:32:01.040 --> 00:32:06.040
get admired like that, that I didn't like sob

568
00:32:06.720 --> 00:32:09.760
or like do anything and that's kind of, you know,

569
00:32:09.760 --> 00:32:10.840
haunted me ever since.

570
00:32:10.840 --> 00:32:14.720
So, I think the Lord just highlighted that for me

571
00:32:14.720 --> 00:32:18.640
to confess and kind of just get off my chest.

572
00:32:19.800 --> 00:32:22.920
So, I've never really told anyone that, so.

573
00:32:22.960 --> 00:32:24.120
Wow.

574
00:32:24.120 --> 00:32:26.800
All right, well, we feel very honored

575
00:32:26.800 --> 00:32:29.840
that you would trust us with that information

576
00:32:29.840 --> 00:32:32.920
and all of you that judged her for drinking and driving

577
00:32:32.920 --> 00:32:37.480
need to check your heart at the door and get God to,

578
00:32:38.320 --> 00:32:39.840
because listen, here's the thing,

579
00:32:39.840 --> 00:32:42.440
when other people confess, James 5.16 says

580
00:32:42.440 --> 00:32:45.600
confess your faults to one another and be healed,

581
00:32:45.600 --> 00:32:48.160
sometimes other people's confessions trigger us

582
00:32:49.000 --> 00:32:53.920
because we have a trauma that somehow is connected

583
00:32:53.920 --> 00:32:56.200
to their confession, even though it wasn't them,

584
00:32:56.200 --> 00:32:58.000
it was a similar situation.

585
00:32:58.000 --> 00:33:01.380
So, Stacey, when did you say this was?

586
00:33:01.380 --> 00:33:04.320
Like in my early 20s, probably shortly after I started.

587
00:33:04.320 --> 00:33:06.800
You literally have never told anyone?

588
00:33:06.800 --> 00:33:07.720
Uh-uh, no.

589
00:33:07.720 --> 00:33:09.040
Wow.

590
00:33:09.040 --> 00:33:09.880
Yeah.

591
00:33:09.880 --> 00:33:10.720
Thank you.

592
00:33:10.720 --> 00:33:11.540
Yeah.

593
00:33:11.540 --> 00:33:12.640
Thank you so much for telling us.

594
00:33:12.640 --> 00:33:14.200
How do you feel now?

595
00:33:14.200 --> 00:33:16.280
A lot better, yeah, yeah.

596
00:33:16.280 --> 00:33:18.640
It's good to just like get it off your chest

597
00:33:18.640 --> 00:33:21.120
and have it out there and then like, you know,

598
00:33:21.120 --> 00:33:24.320
like you don't have to worry about it anymore.

599
00:33:24.320 --> 00:33:26.520
Wow, yeah, it is good.

600
00:33:26.520 --> 00:33:29.360
Like I feel really bad, you know, it's like looking back,

601
00:33:29.360 --> 00:33:31.280
it's like, I wish I had stopped

602
00:33:31.280 --> 00:33:33.160
and like at least left a note and said,

603
00:33:33.160 --> 00:33:37.280
hey, like I did this, I'm sorry,

604
00:33:37.280 --> 00:33:41.080
but you know, hindsight is 20-20 and you can't.

605
00:33:42.840 --> 00:33:43.680
For those of you that are going through it.

606
00:33:43.680 --> 00:33:44.960
Can't go back and redo it, so.

607
00:33:44.960 --> 00:33:47.280
You know, you can't, you cannot and,

608
00:33:47.280 --> 00:33:51.520
but you know, it's great to not keep it in,

609
00:33:51.520 --> 00:33:52.520
but to let it out.

610
00:33:52.520 --> 00:33:55.080
When we keep it in, as I write in the heart work,

611
00:33:55.080 --> 00:33:58.120
that is when the enemy can really accuse us

612
00:33:58.120 --> 00:34:01.160
and attack us and condemn us.

613
00:34:01.160 --> 00:34:03.720
I don't know if I say this in a video in the heart work,

614
00:34:03.720 --> 00:34:06.240
I have not watched those heart work videos for years,

615
00:34:06.240 --> 00:34:10.620
you guys, but do I ever talk about double jeopardy in the,

616
00:34:10.620 --> 00:34:12.440
you know, cause I do a teaching about that,

617
00:34:12.440 --> 00:34:14.520
but I'm not sure if I really talk about

618
00:34:15.080 --> 00:34:17.880
how, you know, the enemy is an accuser,

619
00:34:17.880 --> 00:34:20.480
like a prosecutor in a courtroom,

620
00:34:20.480 --> 00:34:24.560
but if he's accusing us of a specific crime

621
00:34:24.560 --> 00:34:28.440
and we confess, all right,

622
00:34:28.440 --> 00:34:31.320
then, you know, we're acquitted obviously

623
00:34:31.320 --> 00:34:34.360
by the righteous judge and by our advocate Jesus

624
00:34:34.360 --> 00:34:36.440
who died for us and as us.

625
00:34:36.440 --> 00:34:38.760
The problem is, is that if what,

626
00:34:38.760 --> 00:34:42.440
if the details of what's happening are not accurate,

627
00:34:42.440 --> 00:34:43.800
like if we're holding back

628
00:34:44.679 --> 00:34:46.800
and we're only kind of telling partial truth

629
00:34:46.800 --> 00:34:50.440
because we're able to kind of confess part of it,

630
00:34:50.440 --> 00:34:52.480
like what if Stacy's true confession was,

631
00:34:52.480 --> 00:34:55.600
hey, I drove drunk and instead of breaking a mirror off,

632
00:34:55.600 --> 00:34:57.320
you know, like she hit someone.

633
00:34:57.320 --> 00:34:59.440
What if that was really the confession,

634
00:34:59.440 --> 00:35:00.280
but instead of-

635
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:04.880
telling us the whole thing she said yeah oh you know I drove drunk once and yeah

636
00:35:04.880 --> 00:35:08.920
you know it was really wrong like I had been drinking and I drove and you know

637
00:35:08.920 --> 00:35:13.920
and you know I caused you know I caused some damage but she didn't like she

638
00:35:13.920 --> 00:35:19.480
never really confessed right so what happens is is then the enemy has power

639
00:35:19.480 --> 00:35:26.400
over that partial confection to continue to torment you with well you you did

640
00:35:26.400 --> 00:35:32.080
this you didn't do that you did this okay but if we confess to the fullness

641
00:35:32.080 --> 00:35:36.320
of what we did we're still gonna be acquitted God's still gonna call us

642
00:35:36.320 --> 00:35:40.920
innocent because of Jesus dying for us and being our advocate but now the enemy

643
00:35:40.920 --> 00:35:46.280
doesn't have any ammunition I always said that I'd be a great politician

644
00:35:46.280 --> 00:35:50.520
because I put all my skeletons on parade you will not find any skeletons my

645
00:35:50.520 --> 00:35:54.840
closet because I believe in confession and so if anyone's gonna tell you

646
00:35:54.840 --> 00:35:59.960
anything bad about me it's gonna be me I'm gonna be the one that told you that

647
00:35:59.960 --> 00:36:04.600
I did it that I'm the guy right and so part of that double jeopardy and this is

648
00:36:04.600 --> 00:36:09.320
how I learned about that is that while talking about my very destructive

649
00:36:09.320 --> 00:36:13.960
childhood and a lot of you have heard me tell stories about my childhood you know

650
00:36:13.960 --> 00:36:19.640
all of my cousins every one of my cousins that I was in contact with were

651
00:36:19.640 --> 00:36:24.920
all you know involved in a very incestuous relationship with each other

652
00:36:24.920 --> 00:36:29.280
you know we had a lot of incest in our family and so it was very normal for me

653
00:36:29.280 --> 00:36:34.160
as a kid not only was I being sexually abused by my grandfather but to have

654
00:36:34.160 --> 00:36:38.720
incestuous relationships with my brother my only sibling and also with our

655
00:36:38.720 --> 00:36:43.280
cousins and all of us kind of together even though we were only you know

656
00:36:43.280 --> 00:36:48.960
probably eight nine ten eleven twelve years old like up through those years

657
00:36:48.960 --> 00:36:55.320
so one year a cousin came to visit our house and you know this was a cousin my

658
00:36:55.320 --> 00:37:00.600
mom had six siblings this was a first cousin and just like all my other

659
00:37:00.600 --> 00:37:04.400
cousins you know I had sexual contact with this cousin she was quite a bit

660
00:37:04.400 --> 00:37:08.920
younger than me though she was like five or six years younger and and when I say

661
00:37:08.920 --> 00:37:14.360
sexual content contact I just mean like you know sexual games and different

662
00:37:14.360 --> 00:37:19.160
things like you know the kids that are coming from incestuous families play the

663
00:37:19.160 --> 00:37:23.360
problem is is that when I met Jesus and grew up and I began to not just do

664
00:37:23.360 --> 00:37:27.600
heart work but I began to teach other people how to get free from trauma I

665
00:37:27.600 --> 00:37:32.640
would oftentimes tell the story of how you know basically I considered what

666
00:37:32.640 --> 00:37:35.920
happened with this cousin because she was so much younger all my other cousins

667
00:37:35.920 --> 00:37:40.520
were the same age as us like maybe one or two years difference this cousin

668
00:37:40.520 --> 00:37:45.240
because she was so much younger I considered this kind of like something

669
00:37:45.240 --> 00:37:51.320
that was really bad right and I would say oh you know and I was 12 years old

670
00:37:51.320 --> 00:37:55.520
you know I had the sexual contact with my cousin who was like eight years old

671
00:37:55.520 --> 00:37:59.720
at the time but you guys I wasn't 12 years old when it happened I was

672
00:37:59.720 --> 00:38:05.760
actually a teenager I was 13 years old and Holy Spirit brought this small part

673
00:38:05.760 --> 00:38:10.800
of the story to my to my attention and said hey Jackie you know you feel really

674
00:38:10.800 --> 00:38:14.560
ashamed of this and the reason why you feel ashamed of this is because you're

675
00:38:14.560 --> 00:38:18.600
not telling the truth and I was like well what's the truth and he was like

676
00:38:18.600 --> 00:38:22.920
you were not 12 years old he were you were a teenager you were 13 and while

677
00:38:22.920 --> 00:38:27.040
that doesn't make any difference to me this is God talking he said it obviously

678
00:38:27.040 --> 00:38:32.720
makes a big difference to you you obviously are able to receive

679
00:38:32.720 --> 00:38:37.560
forgiveness if you're 12 years old but for some reason you don't think that you

680
00:38:37.560 --> 00:38:42.800
can be forgiven if you were 13 years old when you did this you were a teenager

681
00:38:42.800 --> 00:38:48.200
right and so I realized that that was true and you guys when I confess to the

682
00:38:48.200 --> 00:38:54.120
real crime you know at I was 13 years old when I had the sexual contact you

683
00:38:54.120 --> 00:38:57.320
know she's just visiting for like a week so you know it didn't happen like for

684
00:38:57.320 --> 00:39:00.920
years it happened like you know during that visit like once or twice but the

685
00:39:00.920 --> 00:39:05.920
bottom line is is that I confess to being that much older than her and being

686
00:39:05.920 --> 00:39:12.000
a teenager not an adolescent and I got free from the shame of that and so some

687
00:39:12.000 --> 00:39:16.520
of you you might be holding back certain details from confession because you're

688
00:39:16.520 --> 00:39:20.980
like well I think people can handle it if I did this and they could forgive me

689
00:39:20.980 --> 00:39:27.920
and not think terribly of me but if they knew that I did this then maybe they

690
00:39:27.920 --> 00:39:32.880
wouldn't be able to and so then we just kind of empower the enemy to continue to

691
00:39:32.880 --> 00:39:36.360
bother us about this because we're not forgiving ourselves for the real details

692
00:39:36.360 --> 00:39:40.600
and we're also not confessing to the real details does that really make sense

693
00:39:40.600 --> 00:39:45.960
it's double jeopardy in the human courts someone cannot be tried for the same

694
00:39:45.960 --> 00:39:53.640
crime twice keyword same crime they cannot be tried for the same crime twice

695
00:39:53.640 --> 00:39:59.360
and so if you confess to the full thing the enemy has no power to prosecute you

696
00:39:59.360 --> 00:40:01.760
again

697
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:01.400
after you've been acquitted.

698
00:40:04.920 --> 00:40:08.800
So is anyone interested in confessing to the full,

699
00:40:08.800 --> 00:40:10.160
to the full situation?

700
00:40:10.160 --> 00:40:13.800
I saw one of you, I saw one of you post like,

701
00:40:13.800 --> 00:40:16.480
my confession would make all of you feel like angels.

702
00:40:16.480 --> 00:40:18.800
Well, now we're interested in hearing your confession,

703
00:40:18.800 --> 00:40:19.720
not to judge you,

704
00:40:19.720 --> 00:40:22.080
but to see if we truly feel like angels or not.

705
00:40:23.800 --> 00:40:26.880
Because some of us, you know,

706
00:40:26.880 --> 00:40:29.360
we came out of our mother's womb running for our lives

707
00:40:29.360 --> 00:40:31.160
and we've seen a lot of stuff, you know,

708
00:40:31.160 --> 00:40:34.000
we're like train wrecks and dumpster fires before Jesus

709
00:40:34.000 --> 00:40:37.560
and even after Jesus for a little while.

710
00:40:37.560 --> 00:40:39.000
So who's got what?

711
00:40:39.000 --> 00:40:40.320
Liza, go.

712
00:40:42.040 --> 00:40:42.960
Can I say it?

713
00:40:44.960 --> 00:40:45.800
Okay.

714
00:40:46.720 --> 00:40:48.320
I want to say, confess.

715
00:40:53.000 --> 00:40:57.680
I had the relationship with my stepfather.

716
00:40:57.680 --> 00:41:01.000
My stepfather sexually molested me.

717
00:41:02.960 --> 00:41:07.800
And my mother also probably knew it

718
00:41:07.800 --> 00:41:11.480
because she had a very bad childhood.

719
00:41:11.480 --> 00:41:15.880
She was raped by her own brother.

720
00:41:17.600 --> 00:41:19.200
The brother was different.

721
00:41:19.400 --> 00:41:22.400
Anyway, just I want to confess,

722
00:41:22.400 --> 00:41:26.280
I want to get rid of any skeleton in my life

723
00:41:26.280 --> 00:41:28.640
so I can move on to be God,

724
00:41:28.640 --> 00:41:30.920
create me to be the woman of God

725
00:41:33.320 --> 00:41:36.200
and set free, to serve him.

726
00:41:37.640 --> 00:41:38.480
Yeah.

727
00:41:38.480 --> 00:41:39.520
Is your name Kiki?

728
00:41:41.280 --> 00:41:42.120
Kiki.

729
00:41:42.120 --> 00:41:42.960
Can you say it again?

730
00:41:42.960 --> 00:41:44.280
Cause it's hard for me to hear.

731
00:41:44.280 --> 00:41:45.120
Kiki.

732
00:41:45.120 --> 00:41:45.960
Kiki.

733
00:41:45.960 --> 00:41:46.800
Kiki.

734
00:41:46.800 --> 00:41:47.640
Kiki.

735
00:41:47.760 --> 00:41:48.640
Can you say it again?

736
00:41:48.640 --> 00:41:51.400
Cause it's hard for me to sound things out.

737
00:41:51.400 --> 00:41:54.960
My nickname, Coco.

738
00:41:54.960 --> 00:41:55.800
Coco?

739
00:41:56.760 --> 00:41:57.600
Okay.

740
00:41:57.600 --> 00:42:01.560
So first of all, I'm so sorry that your stepfather,

741
00:42:01.560 --> 00:42:04.560
you know, sexually abused you.

742
00:42:04.560 --> 00:42:06.280
That's a horrible thing to experience.

743
00:42:06.280 --> 00:42:08.160
I also have a story like that.

744
00:42:08.160 --> 00:42:12.120
My grandfather who was my only father figure

745
00:42:12.120 --> 00:42:15.160
sexually abused me from the time I was like two years old

746
00:42:15.160 --> 00:42:17.120
till the time I was like 11.

747
00:42:17.200 --> 00:42:21.280
And so I'm sorry that you experienced that.

748
00:42:21.280 --> 00:42:25.480
And also like your story, my mother knew as well.

749
00:42:25.480 --> 00:42:29.040
And so, and just didn't want to deal with it.

750
00:42:29.960 --> 00:42:33.640
And so we, you know, first of all,

751
00:42:33.640 --> 00:42:35.800
we release you from the pain of that.

752
00:42:35.800 --> 00:42:38.880
And we believe that this confession is going to heal you

753
00:42:38.880 --> 00:42:42.440
cause the Bible says confess to one another and be healed.

754
00:42:42.440 --> 00:42:44.440
So any kind of residual hurt or pain

755
00:42:44.440 --> 00:42:46.280
that you're experiencing because of this,

756
00:42:46.280 --> 00:42:48.880
any kind of low self-esteem or self-hatred,

757
00:42:48.880 --> 00:42:51.720
any kind of unforgiveness or resentment,

758
00:42:51.720 --> 00:42:54.120
or even rage that you might feel against men,

759
00:42:54.120 --> 00:42:56.640
against your mother, against any family,

760
00:42:56.640 --> 00:42:59.640
we believe that you are released from that in Jesus name.

761
00:42:59.640 --> 00:43:02.200
According to your word, Lord, let it be done.

762
00:43:04.480 --> 00:43:05.720
Yes.

763
00:43:05.720 --> 00:43:10.200
So I was being really tormented actually

764
00:43:10.200 --> 00:43:12.960
because my situation is not,

765
00:43:12.960 --> 00:43:17.400
actually, do you mind just have one or two minutes?

766
00:43:17.400 --> 00:43:20.600
Because I had a relationship with him

767
00:43:20.600 --> 00:43:23.160
because I fell in love with him.

768
00:43:23.160 --> 00:43:25.880
Because at that time, my mom divorced

769
00:43:25.880 --> 00:43:29.720
and I was in my heart, actually, I need love.

770
00:43:29.720 --> 00:43:33.560
So he approached me, loved me and, you know, embraced me

771
00:43:33.560 --> 00:43:36.640
and took me up on his bed after my mother,

772
00:43:36.640 --> 00:43:39.000
every time she went to work.

773
00:43:39.000 --> 00:43:42.800
So at that time, I do need love from, you know,

774
00:43:42.800 --> 00:43:44.600
father, speaker, whatever.

775
00:43:44.600 --> 00:43:49.080
So my mom could not give me and my father can.

776
00:43:49.080 --> 00:43:52.560
So, and even though he did not totally rape me

777
00:43:52.560 --> 00:43:55.640
or totally go through that whole sex,

778
00:43:55.640 --> 00:43:57.320
he just, you know, anyway.

779
00:43:58.640 --> 00:43:59.840
So that's why I fell in love.

780
00:43:59.840 --> 00:44:00.840
That's why I was tormented

781
00:44:00.840 --> 00:44:04.360
because I could not be with my stepfather.

782
00:44:04.360 --> 00:44:08.080
So he did not belongs to me,

783
00:44:08.080 --> 00:44:09.320
but I fell in love.

784
00:44:09.320 --> 00:44:11.440
That's why I was so tormented in the night.

785
00:44:11.440 --> 00:44:15.120
I was just, I could not remember exactly.

786
00:44:15.120 --> 00:44:18.600
I was whole night, could not, just was tormented,

787
00:44:18.600 --> 00:44:19.720
tormented me.

788
00:44:19.720 --> 00:44:24.080
So that's why my mind went to the blank

789
00:44:24.080 --> 00:44:27.120
and, you know, sometimes went blank.

790
00:44:27.120 --> 00:44:29.640
That's why I'm still in the process of healing

791
00:44:29.640 --> 00:44:31.560
because of this.

792
00:44:31.560 --> 00:44:34.640
Actually, later on, when I came to America,

793
00:44:34.640 --> 00:44:39.200
this master, master, famous master pursued me.

794
00:44:39.200 --> 00:44:44.200
Actually, I found out he has wife in his own country,

795
00:44:44.560 --> 00:44:46.920
but he did not divorce her,

796
00:44:46.920 --> 00:44:49.840
but he cheated me onto his bed.

797
00:44:49.840 --> 00:44:52.440
Then I found out that he could not marry to me.

798
00:44:52.440 --> 00:44:57.000
So I had to, I had to deal with this kind of thing.

799
00:44:57.000 --> 00:45:00.080
I said, why is happening to me again, again, again?

800
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:07.440
I was so angry and so traumatized and then I had a first marriage and my ex-husband just

801
00:45:07.440 --> 00:45:13.280
pulled me down and spoke a lot of nigger was trying to pull me down and make me um you know

802
00:45:13.280 --> 00:45:21.120
inferior or inferior to him so he can has his control even though he he said he loved me he

803
00:45:21.120 --> 00:45:27.120
he was afraid to you know because I'm younger than him I'm so I was so beautiful I went to

804
00:45:27.920 --> 00:45:33.120
yeah well we don't have time to do a full coaching session right now with this but I believe that

805
00:45:33.120 --> 00:45:39.280
the Lord has brought you here to change your patterns with men you know and I want to tell

806
00:45:39.280 --> 00:45:44.720
you this that you know your first experience with a man your stepfather I know that you think that

807
00:45:44.720 --> 00:45:52.240
you were consensual in that experience and um and also that you fell in love with him and that is

808
00:45:52.240 --> 00:45:56.720
why that happened but honestly what happened is you were being groomed and you were and you were

809
00:45:56.720 --> 00:46:02.000
being abused and so God's going to bring you around to understanding that if you don't understand

810
00:46:02.000 --> 00:46:08.800
that now so that you can fully release yourself from this because once again being groomed a lot

811
00:46:08.800 --> 00:46:14.320
of times it's very um you know covert a lot of times we don't really know that it's happening

812
00:46:14.320 --> 00:46:18.240
and we think we're having these grown-up feelings for these grown-ups in our lives

813
00:46:18.240 --> 00:46:25.360
but honestly what's happening is they're playing upon the abandonment and the the hurt and the

814
00:46:25.360 --> 00:46:30.800
fatherlessness and all the different things that we have and taking advantage of us okay that's not

815
00:46:30.800 --> 00:46:34.640
what love looks like love doesn't look like anything that you've described and so we're

816
00:46:34.640 --> 00:46:39.440
praying for you Coco we believe that you're here because God wants to once again not have you

817
00:46:39.440 --> 00:46:44.000
attract this type of man a man that just wants to use you and abuse you but someone who really

818
00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:49.680
wants to love you and cherish you and respect you and honor you and protect you and so we believe

819
00:46:49.680 --> 00:46:54.720
that for you in Jesus name thank you so much for sharing your story we appreciate it Denise you're

820
00:46:54.720 --> 00:47:07.280
up I thought Liz Liza had her hand up first but I can go oh yeah no no Liza Liza is up um

821
00:47:07.280 --> 00:47:13.040
there are one-on-one coaching um spots yes there are if you want a one-on-one coaching

822
00:47:13.040 --> 00:47:19.840
session you can email admin at jackiedorman.com and you can you can ask about that and you guys

823
00:47:19.840 --> 00:47:24.080
you go ahead first you have some things missing from your resource page that should be there and

824
00:47:24.080 --> 00:47:28.560
so I'm going to find out where that stuff is and then you can go into the resource tab

825
00:47:28.560 --> 00:47:33.040
the one-on-one coaching link should be there for you to book a call if you want to get a

826
00:47:33.040 --> 00:47:41.520
one-on-one session Liza go ahead thank you Jackie and thank you Denise um I was I am in week three

827
00:47:41.520 --> 00:47:46.800
I've done I finished week three I went through the revealing for healing cycle multiple times

828
00:47:46.800 --> 00:47:55.280
um I I had trauma with my dad um and God healed it and he replaced it with his truth I've never

829
00:47:55.280 --> 00:48:01.600
dated so I'm 29 and I've never dated because I always put my career first and there was another

830
00:48:01.600 --> 00:48:12.240
reason because my brother when I was 16 um we didn't have like separate bedrooms so mom used

831
00:48:12.240 --> 00:48:16.560
to sleep in the middle and I would sleep on the other side and my brother would be on the other

832
00:48:16.560 --> 00:48:26.720
side of mom but as my mom would get up he would come and he would place his hand on my breast

833
00:48:27.520 --> 00:48:38.800
um and I was 15 but I could feel that and I I felt so bad about it um so I told my mom

834
00:48:38.800 --> 00:48:49.360
and mom didn't really accept it that brother did that um and she ignored it um but then from

835
00:48:49.360 --> 00:48:59.520
then onwards I was just never able to let anybody touch me um and I my spiritual mother says that I

836
00:48:59.520 --> 00:49:06.800
am a prodigy child um since I was very young like I was 10 years old and I was fifth in the world

837
00:49:06.800 --> 00:49:16.560
in math so that's how um I just focused myself in career and just never dated um and my dad also

838
00:49:16.560 --> 00:49:20.880
had lots of expectations on me so there was perfection that got here there was insecurities

839
00:49:20.880 --> 00:49:25.840
and there was just he had a lot that he wanted me to do and I did I became a chartered accountant

840
00:49:25.840 --> 00:49:33.440
in India and CPA in Canada uh but that's just one thing I just never dated and I'm not able to get

841
00:49:33.440 --> 00:49:38.080
past week three because I just feel like I have to go through that revealing for healing cycle

842
00:49:38.080 --> 00:49:44.080
over and over again and I just can't find any trauma in me other than this one thing apart

843
00:49:44.080 --> 00:49:50.720
from eating all the things from dad well just so you know that is a pretty big thing I mean

844
00:49:50.720 --> 00:49:57.920
you know um not trusting men is basically what that's turned into right and um and not so not

845
00:49:57.920 --> 00:49:59.920
being able to be vulnerable with men

846
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:03.920
And I'm not just talking about sexually I'm talking about at all, you know

847
00:50:03.920 --> 00:50:10.800
That's translated over into that and not only that but having like the mother in your life

848
00:50:11.360 --> 00:50:15.080
Okay, and a lot of times you guys this will get translated to Holy Spirit

849
00:50:15.080 --> 00:50:20.040
Like we don't trust the supernatural or spiritual things because we got mommy wounds, you know

850
00:50:20.040 --> 00:50:25.960
Oftentimes we'll talk about daddy wounds and a lot of us have daddy wounds fear. I'm sorry abandonment

851
00:50:26.640 --> 00:50:27.840
rejection

852
00:50:27.840 --> 00:50:29.840
abuse from a father figure

853
00:50:30.720 --> 00:50:37.280
But we don't really talk about mother wounds that often and so I want you to raise your hand if you had a mother

854
00:50:37.720 --> 00:50:39.560
that you know

855
00:50:39.560 --> 00:50:46.400
Said that you know when you came and tried to get her help or her protection whether it was with a sexual abuse situation

856
00:50:46.880 --> 00:50:51.840
Physical verbal doesn't matter. She either said she didn't believe you or she didn't do anything about it

857
00:50:52.320 --> 00:50:59.440
Let's see all the people that had mom just turn a blind eye when you needed her protection when you needed her help

858
00:51:00.120 --> 00:51:04.120
You know how many of you you feel like mom failed you?

859
00:51:04.880 --> 00:51:06.880
Wasn't there for you?

860
00:51:08.700 --> 00:51:14.480
Okay, all right, so let's talk about the moms that turn a blind eye to us

861
00:51:15.480 --> 00:51:21.200
Telling and so this, you know culture gets all their panties up in a wad when you know

862
00:51:21.200 --> 00:51:27.680
Some politician is about to get elected and all of a sudden some woman comes out of the woodwork from 30 years ago saying hey

863
00:51:27.680 --> 00:51:32.360
They did this to me and people are like, well, why didn't you say anything when it happened? This is why?

864
00:51:32.800 --> 00:51:38.200
This is why no one says anything because no one believes us. We act we get treated like criminals

865
00:51:38.600 --> 00:51:43.360
You know, I told my mom what my grandfather was doing and instead of her stopping him

866
00:51:43.360 --> 00:51:46.800
She said she didn't believe me and she sent me away to live in a girl's home

867
00:51:48.200 --> 00:51:49.840
That kind of stuff happens

868
00:51:49.840 --> 00:51:55.840
So, let me tell you one of the reasons why our mothers told us if they told you they didn't believe you

869
00:51:55.840 --> 00:51:57.840
Let me tell you one of the reasons why

870
00:51:58.040 --> 00:51:59.840
because belief

871
00:51:59.840 --> 00:52:01.840
requires action

872
00:52:04.240 --> 00:52:11.160
Belief requires action if they can just say oh, they're just a kid. They're making it up or they misinterpret it

873
00:52:11.160 --> 00:52:18.120
Maybe they're misunderstanding if they can somehow put it into the category of it's not true

874
00:52:18.640 --> 00:52:21.000
Then they don't have to do anything hard

875
00:52:21.640 --> 00:52:28.040
Like divorce that man that's sexually abusing you or take you away from the situation where this is happening

876
00:52:28.040 --> 00:52:30.880
And then in her case, it was her sibling

877
00:52:31.400 --> 00:52:37.040
Her mother's other child that's doing this. And so what am I gonna do?

878
00:52:37.040 --> 00:52:39.040
What child am I gonna pick right?

879
00:52:39.040 --> 00:52:45.600
And so instead of having those types of hard decisions to make people just say I don't believe it

880
00:52:45.800 --> 00:52:51.840
but deep down inside they really do and I will tell you all my mom's deathbed before she passed away at

881
00:52:51.960 --> 00:52:58.200
63 years old and went to heaven. We had a reckoning over this stuff from my childhood and

882
00:52:58.760 --> 00:53:00.760
She was able to ask me for forgiveness

883
00:53:01.600 --> 00:53:08.120
Which I freely gave her which I had already given her years before she had asked for it, okay

884
00:53:08.120 --> 00:53:10.280
And so we have to forgive

885
00:53:10.920 --> 00:53:13.080
Even though you might not be to the forgiveness week yet

886
00:53:13.480 --> 00:53:17.400
We're doing a little confession in here right now because that's where you guys wanted to go tonight

887
00:53:17.920 --> 00:53:24.640
But just remember that you don't want to just forgive stuff in one big lump. You want to list it out

888
00:53:25.160 --> 00:53:31.200
All the different things that the debts that that person owes you all the different things because the Bible says

889
00:53:31.520 --> 00:53:33.760
Forgive our debts as we forgive our debtors

890
00:53:33.760 --> 00:53:37.520
So treat it like a ledger like you're a CPA and it's a ledger

891
00:53:37.720 --> 00:53:42.560
Put down all the different debts that each person owes you and forgive them one by one

892
00:53:42.720 --> 00:53:48.960
And give Holy Spirit a chance to really speak into each of those situations. Okay. All right. Thank you Liza so much

893
00:53:49.200 --> 00:53:56.640
Yeah, if I can just say one more one last thing is it can we give him the benefit of doubt by saying that

894
00:53:56.640 --> 00:53:58.640
He is he is actually schizophrenic

895
00:53:58.800 --> 00:54:06.240
So does that give him a leeway in that in the case that he didn't know what he was doing?

896
00:54:06.240 --> 00:54:08.240
It was he schizophrenic then?

897
00:54:09.440 --> 00:54:15.000
We didn't know but he was but we didn't we didn't find out until he turned 16 or 17

898
00:54:15.600 --> 00:54:22.960
Okay, so just so you know, he probably was not schizophrenic but this is probably part of the reason why he is schizophrenic

899
00:54:24.280 --> 00:54:27.240
You know mental illness a lot of times because you know

900
00:54:27.240 --> 00:54:34.360
My brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia and he lives on my property and my other house because he's homeless and not able to take care

901
00:54:34.360 --> 00:54:39.440
Of himself, but I will say this I will say that I believe that mental illness

902
00:54:39.760 --> 00:54:42.880
Especially clinical mental illness a lot of it is caused

903
00:54:43.440 --> 00:54:48.440
By people who have had a lot of trauma and they haven't healed from it. So

904
00:54:49.280 --> 00:54:53.720
So yes, so here's the thing you're gonna forgive him. Mm-hmm

905
00:54:54.600 --> 00:54:59.880
You don't need to forgive him only if he didn't know what he was doing. He knew exactly

906
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:05.440
what he was doing. He was going through puberty and he had access to a real live flesh and blood

907
00:55:05.440 --> 00:55:09.680
girl in his own bed even though she was his sister and he wanted to feel your boo.

908
00:55:10.960 --> 00:55:17.600
Yeah. So you know it's we're not going to be like oh well he probably was just out of his mind

909
00:55:17.600 --> 00:55:24.160
because he's mentally ill. No, that's probably the most in alignment with a teenage boy thing

910
00:55:24.160 --> 00:55:30.400
he could have ever done. It's just wrong and it was you know sinful and hurtful and it's caused

911
00:55:30.400 --> 00:55:38.320
you a lot of trauma and so that mindless little pleasure thing that he did for his own jollies

912
00:55:38.320 --> 00:55:46.240
has caused you a lot of damage. Yes. And you got to forgive him and so that God can bring you to a

913
00:55:46.240 --> 00:55:52.160
place where you can trust men and trust contact with men because that's going to be very important.

914
00:55:52.880 --> 00:56:01.040
Thank you. And you're young so let's get that show on the road. Yes. Okay. Thank you. All right.

915
00:56:02.000 --> 00:56:08.240
Denise. No, I just I was the one who said I have confessions that'll make y'all feel like angels.

916
00:56:08.960 --> 00:56:15.520
So I wanted to say that I'm a recovered alcoholic. I just hit my three-year sober anniversary date.

917
00:56:16.080 --> 00:56:24.880
Yay! Congratulations. Thank you so much. But I drank every day for like over 23 years easily.

918
00:56:24.880 --> 00:56:31.760
Wow. And like there was a time so she was talking about driving somebody home when she'd had a

919
00:56:31.760 --> 00:56:37.760
couple she wasn't even drunk. So I can remember going out to a club getting so hammered that I

920
00:56:37.760 --> 00:56:43.520
not only drove myself home but I drove my girlfriend home that night. Didn't remember

921
00:56:43.520 --> 00:56:52.640
the ride to her house or how I got into my bed that night. So and that's just one of many 23 years

922
00:56:52.640 --> 00:56:58.640
of stories I could tell you. But God is so good and forgiving that even in all of that and I can't

923
00:56:58.640 --> 00:57:04.480
confess them all Jackie because I don't remember them all. Well that's probably not a bad thing.

924
00:57:05.040 --> 00:57:11.760
Right. I don't think it is either. Right. But I just I pray I saw a prayer line and I said Lord

925
00:57:11.760 --> 00:57:16.640
I need deliverance from this for the stronghold to be broken and then I want you to take the

926
00:57:16.640 --> 00:57:21.840
desire away because if you knew how much I desire just to get I love alcohol and the way it made me

927
00:57:21.840 --> 00:57:29.200
feel and I can tell you now after being three years sober that he answered that prayer within 24 hours

928
00:57:29.200 --> 00:57:35.360
and that stronghold got broken so that the craving is there like you know you always want to have a

929
00:57:35.360 --> 00:57:40.960
taste for a beer that might come around once in a while but that that strong desire I have to have

930
00:57:40.960 --> 00:57:47.200
it and I'll give up anything to get it gone. So do you did you come from a family of alcoholics?

931
00:57:47.840 --> 00:57:54.800
Yes it's strong on my mom's side and a little bit on my dad's side but it's it's a lot. Were you

932
00:57:54.800 --> 00:58:01.040
raised by an alcoholic parent one of your parents? No. Okay. No so like throughout by the time I was

933
00:58:01.040 --> 00:58:07.520
20 or 21 I had my first drink my mom would have champagne at weddings so it was never in the house

934
00:58:07.600 --> 00:58:14.240
they know I never grew up around it but in my mom's like aunts uncles grandma's brothers it's

935
00:58:14.240 --> 00:58:20.720
it runs rampant in the family so. Okay well we're so glad that that's no longer you know you're

936
00:58:20.720 --> 00:58:26.960
you know self-medicator of choice. Amen. And that you're dealing with all the things that caused you

937
00:58:26.960 --> 00:58:32.800
to you know go to that for medication. Absolutely. And you know you're forgiven of the things that

938
00:58:32.800 --> 00:58:38.880
you did under the influence of that because God loves you and Jesus died for you and as you right?

939
00:58:38.880 --> 00:58:43.280
Yeah yeah. And that's the funny thing you said like confessing to the whole thing to me is kind

940
00:58:43.280 --> 00:58:49.440
of like it's not a big deal because I feel like God already knows the whole truth anyway so if

941
00:58:49.440 --> 00:58:53.760
you're hiding a little piece and unconsciously it's understandable right but consciously if

942
00:58:53.760 --> 00:58:58.240
you're like well if if I just don't tell him this part he already knows. Well the thing is is that

943
00:58:58.240 --> 00:59:02.640
you're not actually hiding it from God because yes he already knows you're actually hiding it from

944
00:59:02.720 --> 00:59:08.800
people. Oh okay. Remember and so James 5 16 says confess your faults to one another and be healed

945
00:59:09.360 --> 00:59:17.040
but a lot of times pride and self-hatred will get in the way and we think oh wow you know I'll confess

946
00:59:17.040 --> 00:59:22.240
to this part but if I told them the whole story you know they would think I'm a terrible person.

947
00:59:22.240 --> 00:59:26.800
You know God can forgive me but people certainly can't and so that is why it's really important

948
00:59:26.800 --> 00:59:33.120
and that's why the enemy continues to torment us with details that we haven't fully disclosed and

949
00:59:33.120 --> 00:59:38.640
so it's very important that we do that. All right so Denise thank you so much we appreciate that and

950
00:59:38.640 --> 00:59:45.360
we're so proud of you. What week are you in? I'm in week four. Okay week four forgiveness week so

951
00:59:45.360 --> 00:59:50.080
lots of stuff and you can just forgive yourself for all the stuff you don't remember. Already

952
00:59:50.080 --> 00:59:55.520
done. Make that a line item. All right it's already done. Awesome okay and hey there might

953
00:59:55.520 --> 00:59:59.840
be other people that you need to ask to forgive you.

954
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:00.840
A lot of that.

955
01:00:00.840 --> 01:00:04.400
Like in AA, because I know AA does a lot of that.

956
01:00:04.400 --> 01:00:05.240
Okay.

957
01:00:05.240 --> 01:00:07.880
I've done a lot of, there's one that's on my heart,

958
01:00:07.880 --> 01:00:10.320
but it's in AA, they tell you

959
01:00:10.320 --> 01:00:12.080
if it's going to damage something

960
01:00:12.080 --> 01:00:14.880
to not go and ask for forgiveness.

961
01:00:14.880 --> 01:00:18.560
And this is, there was adultery involved,

962
01:00:18.560 --> 01:00:21.520
so it would potential to break up a marriage.

963
01:00:21.520 --> 01:00:24.320
So that's kind of when you have to just leave alone

964
01:00:24.320 --> 01:00:28.160
and not ruffle those feathers, I guess, if you could say.

965
01:00:29.000 --> 01:00:30.920
Right, yeah.

966
01:00:30.920 --> 01:00:35.720
I mean, prayerfully, I mean, if God wanted you

967
01:00:35.720 --> 01:00:39.720
to tell someone, did the wife know

968
01:00:39.720 --> 01:00:41.880
that you were cheating with her husband?

969
01:00:41.880 --> 01:00:43.520
She phoned out later.

970
01:00:43.520 --> 01:00:47.760
Okay, so because actually she knows,

971
01:00:48.800 --> 01:00:50.720
the Holy Spirit might put it on your heart

972
01:00:50.720 --> 01:00:53.040
to send a letter with no return address

973
01:00:53.040 --> 01:00:56.560
saying how sorry you were for what you did back then.

974
01:00:56.560 --> 01:00:59.840
I mean, it's one thing to like 20 years later say,

975
01:00:59.840 --> 01:01:02.160
oh, hey, by the way, your husband had an affair

976
01:01:02.160 --> 01:01:03.320
and they don't know about it,

977
01:01:03.320 --> 01:01:06.800
but it's a whole other thing for them to know

978
01:01:06.800 --> 01:01:08.080
and you know that they know

979
01:01:08.080 --> 01:01:09.960
and they know that you know that they know

980
01:01:09.960 --> 01:01:11.560
and you send them a letter saying,

981
01:01:11.560 --> 01:01:13.280
I'm so sorry that I did this.

982
01:01:13.280 --> 01:01:14.880
I hope that you can forgive me.

983
01:01:14.880 --> 01:01:17.560
Not expecting an answer and not even giving a place

984
01:01:17.560 --> 01:01:20.360
for there to be a conversation, you know?

985
01:01:20.360 --> 01:01:21.960
So just consider it.

986
01:01:21.960 --> 01:01:23.280
I'm not able to reach out on LinkedIn

987
01:01:23.280 --> 01:01:24.480
because I don't know their address.

988
01:01:24.480 --> 01:01:26.840
So I might, I think I might find her that way,

989
01:01:26.840 --> 01:01:27.920
but yeah, that's a great idea.

990
01:01:27.920 --> 01:01:29.080
I never thought of that.

991
01:01:29.080 --> 01:01:32.480
But just releasing, releasing that from yourself

992
01:01:32.480 --> 01:01:34.880
and asking for forgiveness without, like you said,

993
01:01:34.880 --> 01:01:37.840
without rehashing anything and getting into any kind

994
01:01:37.840 --> 01:01:40.160
of back and forth situation.

995
01:01:40.160 --> 01:01:41.360
Right, right.

996
01:01:41.360 --> 01:01:42.440
Yeah, okay.

997
01:01:42.440 --> 01:01:43.680
Lolita, what do you got?

998
01:01:46.480 --> 01:01:47.800
Hi, everyone.

999
01:01:49.400 --> 01:01:54.280
So I wanna confess because I had a daughter

1000
01:01:55.120 --> 01:02:00.120
when I was really young and I even asked her to forgive me,

1001
01:02:02.080 --> 01:02:04.760
but I rejected her when she was in the womb

1002
01:02:04.760 --> 01:02:07.280
because the father didn't want me.

1003
01:02:07.280 --> 01:02:10.160
And so now she feels so rejected.

1004
01:02:10.160 --> 01:02:15.160
She's like almost 40 and she has like bad relationships.

1005
01:02:17.800 --> 01:02:21.680
It's like, she just seems like she's doomed.

1006
01:02:21.680 --> 01:02:25.520
I mean, she's a pretty good person.

1007
01:02:27.400 --> 01:02:30.760
She has, you know, she works and she has a daughter,

1008
01:02:30.760 --> 01:02:33.520
but I don't know.

1009
01:02:33.520 --> 01:02:35.400
It's like, I want her to do well,

1010
01:02:35.400 --> 01:02:38.720
but if I say go left, she goes right.

1011
01:02:38.720 --> 01:02:41.280
And I don't know.

1012
01:02:41.280 --> 01:02:46.280
And I just blame myself that if I had been a better mother,

1013
01:02:47.920 --> 01:02:49.280
she wouldn't be that way.

1014
01:02:49.280 --> 01:02:54.200
And I got married, so I chose my ex-husband

1015
01:02:54.200 --> 01:02:56.120
and the children.

1016
01:02:56.120 --> 01:02:58.360
When you said you had to make that decision,

1017
01:02:58.360 --> 01:02:59.640
what you gonna do?

1018
01:02:59.640 --> 01:03:02.240
So she kind of suffered a little bit

1019
01:03:02.240 --> 01:03:04.800
because he really didn't accept her.

1020
01:03:04.800 --> 01:03:09.360
And then now I've been divorced for about 12 years.

1021
01:03:09.360 --> 01:03:12.040
It was abusive relationship and everything.

1022
01:03:12.040 --> 01:03:15.520
And I just can't seem to date.

1023
01:03:15.520 --> 01:03:17.960
It's like, I don't know if it's my energy.

1024
01:03:17.960 --> 01:03:19.680
I don't know what it is.

1025
01:03:19.680 --> 01:03:21.760
My daughter say, my youngest daughter say,

1026
01:03:21.760 --> 01:03:23.080
I'm scared of men.

1027
01:03:23.080 --> 01:03:24.320
That's what she tells me.

1028
01:03:25.560 --> 01:03:27.200
Well, she might be right.

1029
01:03:27.200 --> 01:03:28.400
Our kids do know us.

1030
01:03:28.400 --> 01:03:29.720
And so if that's true,

1031
01:03:29.720 --> 01:03:32.880
then that fear obviously is connected probably

1032
01:03:32.880 --> 01:03:34.560
to some unhealed trauma.

1033
01:03:34.560 --> 01:03:36.560
And so that is what we want Holy Spirit

1034
01:03:36.560 --> 01:03:37.640
to bring to the surface.

1035
01:03:37.640 --> 01:03:40.640
So just, you know, that's what your prayer looks like.

1036
01:03:40.640 --> 01:03:43.880
You know, I'm not able to date

1037
01:03:43.880 --> 01:03:46.160
and it doesn't have anything to do with my age.

1038
01:03:46.160 --> 01:03:47.760
It doesn't have anything to do with,

1039
01:03:48.560 --> 01:03:51.280
it has to do with something that I'm not aware of Lord.

1040
01:03:51.280 --> 01:03:53.800
And so I need you to make me aware of that.

1041
01:03:53.800 --> 01:03:56.360
You know, so-and-so says that I'm scared of men.

1042
01:03:56.360 --> 01:03:57.640
If there's any truth to that,

1043
01:03:57.640 --> 01:04:00.760
show me, you know, where that's coming from

1044
01:04:00.760 --> 01:04:03.160
and, you know, what needs to be healed still.

1045
01:04:05.200 --> 01:04:06.840
You guys, we can pray these prayers.

1046
01:04:06.840 --> 01:04:10.480
We can process with the Lord using the heartwork tools,

1047
01:04:10.480 --> 01:04:12.280
asking prophetic questions

1048
01:04:12.280 --> 01:04:15.080
and getting breakthrough answers.

1049
01:04:15.080 --> 01:04:17.800
Okay, it's really important that we do that.

1050
01:04:17.800 --> 01:04:20.640
Don't just accept any area of your life

1051
01:04:20.640 --> 01:04:22.160
that's not glistening with hope,

1052
01:04:22.160 --> 01:04:24.640
that's not the John 10, 10 experience

1053
01:04:24.640 --> 01:04:27.760
that Jesus said we could have of abundant overflowing life.

1054
01:04:27.760 --> 01:04:31.680
That area of your life is usually connected to lies.

1055
01:04:31.680 --> 01:04:33.560
Remember, it's not the trauma that's gonna keep you

1056
01:04:33.560 --> 01:04:34.680
from living abundant life.

1057
01:04:34.680 --> 01:04:38.280
It's the lies that you believe because of trauma

1058
01:04:38.280 --> 01:04:41.800
that are going to keep you from living abundant life.

1059
01:04:41.800 --> 01:04:44.800
All right, so we have to answer those questions.

1060
01:04:45.480 --> 01:04:47.600
We have to ask those questions and get those answers.

1061
01:04:47.600 --> 01:04:50.760
All right, we're really pretty much out of time.

1062
01:04:50.760 --> 01:04:52.200
It's like 10 after,

1063
01:04:52.200 --> 01:04:56.440
so I'm just going to let you guys go for tonight.

1064
01:04:56.440 --> 01:04:59.040
This is available in replay.

1065
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:08.560
let's just let's just do a little bit of a little bit of release of our moms

1066
01:05:08.560 --> 01:05:14.800
right now and this might be you towards your mom it could also be you towards

1067
01:05:14.800 --> 01:05:19.760
you're the mom you're the mom that needs release like Lolita just said she said

1068
01:05:19.760 --> 01:05:23.960
that I mistreated my daughter you know I wasn't I rejected her in the womb

1069
01:05:23.960 --> 01:05:28.720
because I felt rejected and remember if your mom's did hurt you or another woman

1070
01:05:28.720 --> 01:05:33.440
in your life hurts you so let's release the feminine wounds right now so sisters

1071
01:05:33.440 --> 01:05:40.200
pastors wives coaches teachers best friends any women in our life that have

1072
01:05:40.200 --> 01:05:43.640
failed us we're just gonna release them as a group right now do you guys want to

1073
01:05:43.640 --> 01:05:47.480
do that together and if you're the person you're the villain so to speak of

1074
01:05:47.480 --> 01:05:51.560
the story you're seeing yourself you see yourself as the villain God doesn't see

1075
01:05:51.560 --> 01:05:57.480
you as the villain okay broken people break people that's a true story but

1076
01:05:57.480 --> 01:06:02.040
healed people heal people that's also a true story and so we want to make sure

1077
01:06:02.040 --> 01:06:08.640
that we are not you know taking on those counterfeit identities of you know being

1078
01:06:08.640 --> 01:06:13.440
the victimizer being the perpetrator or the villain because we made those

1079
01:06:13.440 --> 01:06:20.960
decisions because we had a broken heart okay and so that goes also for the

1080
01:06:20.960 --> 01:06:26.480
people that have hurt us they are not their sin just like you are not your

1081
01:06:26.480 --> 01:06:31.360
pain their identity is not their sin just like your identity is not the pain

1082
01:06:31.360 --> 01:06:36.800
that their sin caused you right so let's release them to the Lord right now

1083
01:06:36.800 --> 01:06:43.880
father I just come before you and I come on behalf of all these women that have

1084
01:06:43.880 --> 01:06:49.000
hurt your daughters that are on this call even if they are one of those that

1085
01:06:49.000 --> 01:06:55.280
have hurt others Lord we're just asking for there to be released tonight and so

1086
01:06:55.280 --> 01:06:59.920
I'm asking you on behalf of those women that have hurt you will you forgive me

1087
01:06:59.920 --> 01:07:08.440
will you forgive me for abandoning you for lying about you for lying to you for

1088
01:07:08.440 --> 01:07:15.640
not trusting you for believing the worst about you for criticizing you judging

1089
01:07:15.640 --> 01:07:20.360
you for verbally abusing you for telling you that you're no good and that you'll

1090
01:07:20.360 --> 01:07:25.760
never amount to anything wishing that I never had you or never knew you telling

1091
01:07:25.760 --> 01:07:30.440
you that you've ruined my life somehow I was just in pain I was looking for

1092
01:07:30.440 --> 01:07:38.240
someone to blame and I blamed you will you forgive me will you forgive me will

1093
01:07:38.240 --> 01:07:44.680
you forgive me for choosing others over you for choosing men over you for

1094
01:07:44.680 --> 01:07:48.240
choosing your siblings thinking that they were better than you for comparing

1095
01:07:48.240 --> 01:07:52.600
you to them comparing you to your friends comparing you to my friends

1096
01:07:52.600 --> 01:07:58.640
children always saying that you could do better always thinking that you're not

1097
01:07:58.640 --> 01:08:03.640
enough and telling you that you're not good enough I felt like I wasn't good

1098
01:08:03.640 --> 01:08:10.320
enough I was projecting my own pain and my own worthlessness that I was feeling

1099
01:08:10.320 --> 01:08:18.000
onto you will you forgive me will you forgive me for abusing you verbally

1100
01:08:18.000 --> 01:08:24.479
mentally emotionally physically spiritually financially will you forgive

1101
01:08:24.479 --> 01:08:31.600
me for allowing you to be abused in those areas for turning a blind eye for

1102
01:08:31.600 --> 01:08:36.880
saying I didn't believe you for not helping you for not protecting you

1103
01:08:40.439 --> 01:08:49.040
for not understanding or caring about the pain that you were in for being too

1104
01:08:49.040 --> 01:08:55.520
busy too distracted for not treating you like you were important for never sitting

1105
01:08:55.520 --> 01:09:04.760
and listening to you for not wanting to know you deeper and better for being

1106
01:09:04.760 --> 01:09:10.439
selfish for being focused on my own happiness in my own life or being too

1107
01:09:10.439 --> 01:09:14.800
caught up in my own pain and my own trauma my own trouble to see your pain

1108
01:09:14.800 --> 01:09:21.279
and trauma and trouble will you forgive me

1109
01:09:22.120 --> 01:09:25.439
will you forgive me

1110
01:09:26.439 --> 01:09:36.240
can you forgive me I didn't want to hurt you I was hurting I didn't mean to let

1111
01:09:36.240 --> 01:09:43.000
you be abused that wasn't what I wanted but I didn't know how to stop it I was

1112
01:09:43.000 --> 01:09:48.960
scared I was confused I was selfish

1113
01:09:50.840 --> 01:09:54.120
can you forgive me

1114
01:09:55.440 --> 01:10:01.960
yes Lord just sit in that for a moment and anything that

1115
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:02.600
You didn't hear, but you need to hear.

1116
01:10:02.600 --> 01:10:04.280
Just go ahead and let God whisper that

1117
01:10:04.280 --> 01:10:08.800
to your heart right now on behalf of these women

1118
01:10:08.800 --> 01:10:10.860
that have hurt us in our lives.

1119
01:10:12.880 --> 01:10:14.300
Receive that.

1120
01:10:15.440 --> 01:10:17.560
Receive that apology right now

1121
01:10:17.560 --> 01:10:19.400
that yet they never gave you.

1122
01:10:19.400 --> 01:10:20.780
Receive it right now.

1123
01:10:21.700 --> 01:10:22.700
I'm sorry.

1124
01:10:24.240 --> 01:10:27.100
Sorry for stealing your husband or your boyfriend,

1125
01:10:27.100 --> 01:10:29.400
for talking about you behind your back,

1126
01:10:29.460 --> 01:10:32.740
for backstabbing you, for gossiping about you,

1127
01:10:32.740 --> 01:10:34.040
for judging you.

1128
01:10:36.860 --> 01:10:40.740
Forgive those bonus moms that your husband's remarried,

1129
01:10:40.740 --> 01:10:42.260
your former husband's remarried,

1130
01:10:42.260 --> 01:10:45.480
those stepmothers that turned your children against you

1131
01:10:45.480 --> 01:10:50.480
and tried to sabotage your relationship with others.

1132
01:10:54.040 --> 01:10:55.620
Forgive them right now.

1133
01:10:56.560 --> 01:10:59.360
Forgive the people that stole money from you

1134
01:10:59.360 --> 01:11:01.000
and took advantage of you.

1135
01:11:03.480 --> 01:11:06.040
The people that simply were supposed to be your best friend,

1136
01:11:06.040 --> 01:11:09.060
but they just weren't there for you in hard times.

1137
01:11:09.060 --> 01:11:10.320
You were always there for them,

1138
01:11:10.320 --> 01:11:11.960
but they just were not there for you.

1139
01:11:11.960 --> 01:11:14.580
They abandoned you emotionally and physically.

1140
01:11:19.980 --> 01:11:21.880
You are the giver and they're the taker.

1141
01:11:21.880 --> 01:11:23.020
Forgive them.

1142
01:11:26.600 --> 01:11:28.800
Lord, we just forgive right now.

1143
01:11:30.000 --> 01:11:31.500
We ask that you would just,

1144
01:11:32.960 --> 01:11:34.600
ooh, release.

1145
01:11:36.520 --> 01:11:41.520
Release healing right now over each and every heart

1146
01:11:41.600 --> 01:11:43.880
in all of these deep areas.

1147
01:11:46.520 --> 01:11:48.080
Speak to us, Lord.

1148
01:11:49.240 --> 01:11:51.160
What do we get in return, Lord?

1149
01:11:51.160 --> 01:11:54.680
As we release this trauma to you,

1150
01:11:55.760 --> 01:11:59.080
what will you give us in return?

1151
01:11:59.080 --> 01:12:00.380
Just ask God that right now.

1152
01:12:00.380 --> 01:12:03.540
As I release this person, as I cancel this debt,

1153
01:12:03.540 --> 01:12:07.320
as I receive this apology that was never given,

1154
01:12:07.320 --> 01:12:09.200
and I'm making space in my heart

1155
01:12:09.200 --> 01:12:12.080
where this hurt once lived,

1156
01:12:12.080 --> 01:12:14.720
what will you fill this space with, God?

1157
01:12:14.720 --> 01:12:18.060
What will you give me in exchange?

1158
01:12:26.480 --> 01:12:27.400
Yes, Jesus.

1159
01:12:28.400 --> 01:12:30.680
If anyone wants to put what they heard in the comments,

1160
01:12:30.680 --> 01:12:31.920
we would love to see that.

1161
01:12:31.920 --> 01:12:36.920
What can you have in exchange for this forgiveness?

1162
01:12:37.960 --> 01:12:39.520
What can you have in exchange?

1163
01:12:39.700 --> 01:12:44.700
What can you have in exchange for this forgiveness?

1164
01:12:45.060 --> 01:12:46.700
What can you have in exchange?

1165
01:13:00.340 --> 01:13:04.100
Is care, is acceptance, peace beyond all understanding,

1166
01:13:04.100 --> 01:13:06.060
peace and rest, peace?

1167
01:13:06.920 --> 01:13:11.920
Yes, freedom, healing, peace, love,

1168
01:13:14.840 --> 01:13:17.520
a deeper relationship with him, yes.

1169
01:13:19.920 --> 01:13:22.680
Peace, hope, joy, love, contentment.

1170
01:13:25.240 --> 01:13:27.140
I feel like someone is forgiving their mom,

1171
01:13:27.140 --> 01:13:29.760
forgiving them up for adoption, for abandoning them.

1172
01:13:29.760 --> 01:13:31.120
Right now, you're forgiving.

1173
01:13:31.120 --> 01:13:33.040
You're really releasing her.

1174
01:13:34.040 --> 01:13:37.740
I feel like someone else saw their mom,

1175
01:13:37.740 --> 01:13:38.940
it might be the same person.

1176
01:13:38.940 --> 01:13:41.260
After many years, you reunited with your mom

1177
01:13:41.260 --> 01:13:42.940
and it was such a disappointment

1178
01:13:43.940 --> 01:13:46.760
because she wasn't sorry for what she had done.

1179
01:13:49.820 --> 01:13:53.140
She had lots of problems with just attachment

1180
01:13:53.140 --> 01:13:54.620
and just being vulnerable,

1181
01:13:54.620 --> 01:13:56.380
and it was just a huge disappointment.

1182
01:13:56.380 --> 01:13:59.260
You thought it was gonna be really great and awesome,

1183
01:13:59.260 --> 01:14:01.660
and you wanted it for so long in your life,

1184
01:14:01.660 --> 01:14:02.820
and then when you finally got it,

1185
01:14:03.600 --> 01:14:04.720
it just was a train wreck.

1186
01:14:04.720 --> 01:14:06.400
Just release it.

1187
01:14:06.400 --> 01:14:08.840
Release it to the Lord and receive.

1188
01:14:08.840 --> 01:14:12.180
In exchange, receive mother figures in your life

1189
01:14:12.180 --> 01:14:15.280
that love you, that care for you, that support you,

1190
01:14:15.280 --> 01:14:17.640
that understand you, that are there for you

1191
01:14:17.640 --> 01:14:19.280
because God has that for you.

1192
01:14:19.280 --> 01:14:21.000
Doesn't have to be biological.

1193
01:14:22.240 --> 01:14:25.920
Joy, peace and joy, joy and peace, love in his presence,

1194
01:14:25.920 --> 01:14:27.600
all really great things.

1195
01:14:33.120 --> 01:14:36.120
Yes, Sharon, that could possibly be for you,

1196
01:14:36.120 --> 01:14:37.560
that first part of that word.

1197
01:14:39.120 --> 01:14:41.800
You guys, sometimes forgiveness has layers,

1198
01:14:41.800 --> 01:14:44.080
not sometimes, forgiveness always has layers.

1199
01:14:44.080 --> 01:14:45.600
It's not a feeling.

1200
01:14:45.600 --> 01:14:48.120
It's just a command from heaven that we forgive

1201
01:14:48.120 --> 01:14:49.600
so we can be forgiven.

1202
01:14:49.600 --> 01:14:53.120
But sometimes deeper levels of forgiveness

1203
01:14:53.120 --> 01:14:55.360
happen in the same area

1204
01:14:56.440 --> 01:14:58.800
where there's more forgiveness,

1205
01:14:58.800 --> 01:15:00.340
where there's more.

1206
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:06.880
closure with that forgiveness than ever before. Rebuilding your life, identities coming, joy,

1207
01:15:06.880 --> 01:15:15.200
peace, love, lightheartedness, yes, yes, yes. Being light of heart. All right, ladies,

1208
01:15:15.200 --> 01:15:21.920
this has been really great tonight. I hope that you have enjoyed it as well.

1209
01:15:21.920 --> 01:15:30.560
Some of you, your mothers or the women in your life are the root of why you don't trust men.

1210
01:15:31.280 --> 01:15:35.600
Men have really never done anything to you, but they hurt the women that came before you. And so

1211
01:15:35.600 --> 01:15:45.520
those women, their ideas of men have now been handed down to you. And so you have to let go

1212
01:15:45.520 --> 01:15:50.800
of that. You can't take up the offense for someone else, right? That's their offense.

1213
01:15:50.800 --> 01:15:56.880
They have to forgive those men. That is not your place to do that. So you need to release that

1214
01:15:58.000 --> 01:16:06.320
and all of the things that were handed down to you in the form of just family sayings and

1215
01:16:06.320 --> 01:16:13.360
conversations and overhearing conversations and being privy to the things that happened to a

1216
01:16:13.360 --> 01:16:21.680
woman in your life, a grandmother, a mother. And now you've let it harden your heart,

1217
01:16:22.480 --> 01:16:28.320
even though it didn't happen to you at all. Release that. Forgive them for jading you

1218
01:16:30.240 --> 01:16:35.840
and release it, okay? So that you can have a fresh slate, a clean slate

1219
01:16:36.560 --> 01:16:42.880
that God can write your love story on. It's going to be great. It's going to be wonderful.

1220
01:16:44.320 --> 01:16:44.800
Thank you.

1221
01:16:44.800 --> 01:16:48.640
All right. Bless you guys. Have a great night. See you soon. Bye-bye.