WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:09.420 All right, gentlemen, welcome to Men's Heart Check-In, March 10th, man, 2025. 2 00:00:09.420 --> 00:00:12.620 This year's going very, very fast. 3 00:00:12.620 --> 00:00:19.580 And we had some yucking up before we hit record on this session, which kind of led us into 4 00:00:19.580 --> 00:00:25.220 kind of what we're going to talk about tonight. 5 00:00:25.220 --> 00:00:27.260 I'll just, I guess I'll just throw it out. 6 00:00:27.260 --> 00:00:29.020 There's no good place to start in this. 7 00:00:29.020 --> 00:00:41.660 I freaking lost my shit today in front of my wife and kind of directed some of it at 8 00:00:41.660 --> 00:00:47.740 her inadvertently and didn't even know that I did. 9 00:00:47.740 --> 00:00:50.680 And it was not good. 10 00:00:50.680 --> 00:00:52.580 It was bad. 11 00:00:52.580 --> 00:00:59.220 And so I'm not even going to, I'm not even going to try to make it sound exceptional. 12 00:00:59.220 --> 00:01:01.540 Like, oh, there's an exception to it. 13 00:01:01.540 --> 00:01:11.180 I was doing a project, I was working and I was in the midst of something very, very difficult 14 00:01:11.180 --> 00:01:14.620 because I was like leaning over and I was trying to hold my body at the same time as 15 00:01:14.620 --> 00:01:16.780 doing this work. 16 00:01:16.780 --> 00:01:20.180 And she came around the corner in the room. 17 00:01:20.180 --> 00:01:24.060 I was in the apartment cause I was putting, fixing some things and she came around the 18 00:01:24.060 --> 00:01:28.520 corner and scared the living crap out of me. 19 00:01:28.520 --> 00:01:40.820 And then I like reacted and she was on the phone in video phone with somebody that we 20 00:01:40.820 --> 00:01:41.820 don't really know. 21 00:01:41.820 --> 00:01:49.260 I mean, it wasn't like it was like sort of a formal, she was like asking some, a doctor's 22 00:01:49.340 --> 00:01:51.180 office, something. 23 00:01:51.180 --> 00:01:59.540 And here I am literally like a crazed maniac idiot in the background, like screaming at 24 00:01:59.540 --> 00:02:01.800 her, like yelling at her. 25 00:02:01.800 --> 00:02:03.140 She said I screamed at her. 26 00:02:03.140 --> 00:02:04.140 I actually don't know. 27 00:02:04.140 --> 00:02:14.500 I thought I remembered what I said, which was I thought I said to her you scared the 28 00:02:14.500 --> 00:02:16.140 crap out of me. 29 00:02:16.140 --> 00:02:18.260 And I said that loudly. 30 00:02:18.260 --> 00:02:24.620 And then I thought I went back to work, but she said, I said, go away, get away, like 31 00:02:24.620 --> 00:02:25.620 whatever. 32 00:02:25.620 --> 00:02:28.100 I'm not really sure what I said. 33 00:02:28.100 --> 00:02:33.140 So I'm confessing this guys. 34 00:02:33.140 --> 00:02:44.580 And it's and it really hurt her because she has a history of that, like in her family. 35 00:02:44.580 --> 00:02:46.460 I didn't mean to do that. 36 00:02:46.460 --> 00:02:49.580 I apologized to her and repented to her. 37 00:02:49.580 --> 00:02:55.820 We've talked about it since then, but that's not at all what I had intended actually for 38 00:02:55.820 --> 00:02:57.140 today. 39 00:02:57.140 --> 00:03:02.780 We just got back from our trip yesterday and it was a glorious, just amazing trip, business 40 00:03:02.780 --> 00:03:08.860 trip, friends trip, spiritual trip, an exotic trip. 41 00:03:08.860 --> 00:03:09.860 And it was great. 42 00:03:09.860 --> 00:03:13.820 And it was like really relaxing and connecting and a bunch of stuff. 43 00:03:13.820 --> 00:03:21.140 And the day after this happens, I had intended to do this project. 44 00:03:21.140 --> 00:03:24.780 And for her to be like, Oh babe, that's so awesome. 45 00:03:24.780 --> 00:03:25.780 Look at you. 46 00:03:25.780 --> 00:03:26.780 You did the little thing. 47 00:03:26.780 --> 00:03:27.780 Honey, do thing. 48 00:03:27.780 --> 00:03:28.780 Not only that, you went the extra mile and you did the thing. 49 00:03:28.780 --> 00:03:30.920 And it's, you did such a great job. 50 00:03:30.920 --> 00:03:37.720 That was my intention today, but that's not how it turned out. 51 00:03:37.720 --> 00:03:40.820 And I'm like, what the crap just happened? 52 00:03:40.820 --> 00:03:45.460 I'm like, what, what is wrong with me? 53 00:03:45.460 --> 00:03:46.460 You know? 54 00:03:46.460 --> 00:03:49.620 And I could say a bunch of things like, well, I was startled. 55 00:03:49.620 --> 00:03:53.660 Well, I was really in a difficult position because I was working hard and I was straining. 56 00:03:53.660 --> 00:03:58.420 I was really struggling to do what I was doing and then, or I was interrupted in this and 57 00:03:58.420 --> 00:04:03.420 I really just needed to get this thing that I was like trying to like hurry myself up. 58 00:04:03.420 --> 00:04:08.460 I could have a whole bunch of different excuses and reasons and stuff, but I'm not going to 59 00:04:08.460 --> 00:04:11.940 bring any of that stuff up. 60 00:04:11.940 --> 00:04:12.940 And I didn't with her. 61 00:04:12.940 --> 00:04:17.140 I mean, I tried to, I'll tell you that, honey, you didn't understand. 62 00:04:17.140 --> 00:04:20.500 You don't understand. 63 00:04:20.500 --> 00:04:28.700 And then she got even more upset because I wasn't owning my shit. 64 00:04:28.700 --> 00:04:31.400 Like that's the thing that makes it worse. 65 00:04:31.400 --> 00:04:33.260 It's like one thing you did it. 66 00:04:33.260 --> 00:04:37.780 And then the next thing now I'm trying to make it sound better and it doesn't sound 67 00:04:37.780 --> 00:04:38.780 better. 68 00:04:38.780 --> 00:04:44.020 I mean, I can only imagine what that person on the other side of the phone call was thinking 69 00:04:44.020 --> 00:04:48.140 like, Oh my God, this woman is an abusive situation. 70 00:04:48.140 --> 00:04:51.940 Like, I mean, should we call the authorities? 71 00:04:51.940 --> 00:04:53.780 I mean like, what should we do? 72 00:04:53.780 --> 00:04:56.220 Like this is not good. 73 00:04:56.220 --> 00:04:59.980 And I know that you might be surprised like you. 74 00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:01.120 Really, this is how you are? 75 00:05:01.120 --> 00:05:04.360 Like, I don't know, I guess. 76 00:05:04.360 --> 00:05:07.920 There are some times I do kind of like get fired up. 77 00:05:07.920 --> 00:05:09.520 Sometimes I get fired up for the right things. 78 00:05:09.520 --> 00:05:11.320 I get a little righteous indignation. 79 00:05:12.280 --> 00:05:15.280 But sometimes I get frustrated just like any guy does. 80 00:05:18.140 --> 00:05:21.420 And sometimes we want to gloss that over, 81 00:05:21.420 --> 00:05:22.880 like, oh, I'm just a guy, I'm just a dude. 82 00:05:22.880 --> 00:05:25.800 You know, like we get frustrated sometimes. 83 00:05:25.800 --> 00:05:28.120 But I repented my text to her 84 00:05:28.200 --> 00:05:30.960 because sometimes, I don't know about you, 85 00:05:30.960 --> 00:05:34.680 but sometimes talking, like later on, 86 00:05:34.680 --> 00:05:37.200 after some time has passed, we can talk about some things. 87 00:05:37.200 --> 00:05:39.400 But in the moment, it's difficult 88 00:05:39.400 --> 00:05:41.200 to try to smooth that over or talk about it 89 00:05:41.200 --> 00:05:43.560 or even just level-headedly talk about it. 90 00:05:43.560 --> 00:05:45.200 You just gotta wait for some time to pass 91 00:05:45.200 --> 00:05:48.160 because there's just some sore moments. 92 00:05:48.160 --> 00:05:50.240 And my text to her, because I wanted to make sure 93 00:05:50.240 --> 00:05:55.240 that I apologized and was quick to repent 94 00:05:56.240 --> 00:06:00.240 and quick to apologize and not linger and hold that on 95 00:06:00.240 --> 00:06:05.240 till any time further, or God forbid, even tomorrow. 96 00:06:05.520 --> 00:06:07.560 That's why the scripture says, 97 00:06:07.560 --> 00:06:10.240 do not let the sun set on your wrath 98 00:06:10.240 --> 00:06:12.640 or however, like, don't let, however that's stated. 99 00:06:12.640 --> 00:06:16.600 I can't quote that scripture exactly correct right now. 100 00:06:16.600 --> 00:06:19.120 My text was, is I apologize 101 00:06:19.120 --> 00:06:23.440 for not exercising self-control and raging. 102 00:06:24.160 --> 00:06:27.040 I did not mean to say whatever I said. 103 00:06:27.040 --> 00:06:29.000 I'm sorry for yelling at you and being mean. 104 00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:32.000 That was certainly not what I wanted to happen today. 105 00:06:33.240 --> 00:06:34.600 I simply wanted to complete the task 106 00:06:34.600 --> 00:06:36.600 and have you be proud of me and happy. 107 00:06:36.600 --> 00:06:38.600 I did not meet that goal. 108 00:06:38.600 --> 00:06:40.960 Please forgive me from the bottom of my heart. 109 00:06:42.440 --> 00:06:47.440 So finally, I got around to not explaining myself away 110 00:06:47.600 --> 00:06:52.600 and just owning it and saying, it's me, I'm sorry. 111 00:06:52.680 --> 00:06:54.280 You walked into that, I could have made, 112 00:06:54.280 --> 00:06:56.800 I could have told her, well, you surprised me. 113 00:06:56.800 --> 00:07:01.080 Then all I can say, bottom line is, is I lost it. 114 00:07:02.640 --> 00:07:07.640 And now I'm going to have to, you know, reconnect. 115 00:07:09.400 --> 00:07:10.920 Whatever that looks like, whatever that means, 116 00:07:10.920 --> 00:07:15.520 whatever that, whatever that my responsibility is in that. 117 00:07:16.760 --> 00:07:20.880 And that's difficult. 118 00:07:20.880 --> 00:07:24.960 And it is not at all what I had intended for today. 119 00:07:24.960 --> 00:07:27.720 Cause I saw this day going way differently, 120 00:07:27.720 --> 00:07:32.000 not even just collecting, connecting, finishing a project, 121 00:07:32.000 --> 00:07:35.600 but even just like really having some great, you know, 122 00:07:35.600 --> 00:07:38.280 close time with my wife tonight and just like settling down. 123 00:07:38.280 --> 00:07:40.200 We just got back, we just traveled 124 00:07:40.200 --> 00:07:42.680 and just kind of getting ready for the rest of the week 125 00:07:42.680 --> 00:07:44.920 and just having a really great, great day. 126 00:07:46.080 --> 00:07:48.200 And so that's that. 127 00:07:49.200 --> 00:07:54.200 So I'm making that confession to you tonight. 128 00:07:55.080 --> 00:08:00.080 And so I appreciate your prayers and your inspiration. 129 00:08:01.560 --> 00:08:04.720 I don't, and the first thing I don't need is, 130 00:08:04.720 --> 00:08:06.440 it's okay, we all make mistakes. 131 00:08:06.440 --> 00:08:08.880 Nope, don't need that. 132 00:08:10.520 --> 00:08:12.160 We do all make mistakes, that is true, 133 00:08:12.160 --> 00:08:16.400 but that's not the kind of consolation, you know? 134 00:08:17.400 --> 00:08:20.920 Matter of fact, I don't really need any consolation. 135 00:08:20.920 --> 00:08:23.360 It's just, I just trying to confess to you, 136 00:08:23.360 --> 00:08:25.680 like in this environment, to you guys, 137 00:08:25.680 --> 00:08:27.760 to you guys that I know and be vulnerable 138 00:08:27.760 --> 00:08:31.160 and just, and transparent and say, yeah, that happened today. 139 00:08:31.160 --> 00:08:33.000 Cause I could have got on this call 140 00:08:33.000 --> 00:08:36.080 and I could have not mentioned any of that. 141 00:08:36.080 --> 00:08:37.799 And we could have just had our regular time 142 00:08:37.799 --> 00:08:39.200 and we could have just talked and we could have just 143 00:08:39.200 --> 00:08:40.520 yucked it up and had a great time. 144 00:08:40.520 --> 00:08:42.480 And we could have talked about really spiritual, 145 00:08:42.480 --> 00:08:45.000 like happy, heavenly things and all that. 146 00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:48.320 And then you guys would have had a fulfilling time 147 00:08:48.320 --> 00:08:49.760 and it would have been great. 148 00:08:49.760 --> 00:08:52.040 We would connected and we would have called it 149 00:08:52.040 --> 00:08:55.040 a men's heart check-in, but I didn't. 150 00:08:55.040 --> 00:08:58.320 I get on here and I just exposed myself. 151 00:08:58.320 --> 00:09:00.000 So that's what happened today. 152 00:09:02.400 --> 00:09:07.400 And so I actually have something that I'd like to get into. 153 00:09:11.160 --> 00:09:12.000 Can I say something? 154 00:09:12.000 --> 00:09:13.840 And let me just ask this question here. 155 00:09:15.000 --> 00:09:20.000 The, what is it that you're working through right now? 156 00:09:31.200 --> 00:09:33.040 Not necessarily in the context of like, 157 00:09:33.040 --> 00:09:35.360 what I'm like, I just messed up. 158 00:09:35.360 --> 00:09:36.640 I just, you know, had a bad day. 159 00:09:36.640 --> 00:09:37.920 I had a bad moment today. 160 00:09:37.920 --> 00:09:39.480 I really screwed up. 161 00:09:39.480 --> 00:09:42.880 Not that, but especially around the area of fear. 162 00:09:43.880 --> 00:09:46.360 David, could I needle you for a second? 163 00:09:46.360 --> 00:09:49.480 Just, could I needle you for a second? 164 00:09:49.480 --> 00:09:50.320 Sure. 165 00:09:51.840 --> 00:09:53.920 What would you do differently? 166 00:09:53.920 --> 00:09:56.040 Like, if you look back, like how, 167 00:09:56.040 --> 00:09:57.800 like you were scared in the moment. 168 00:09:58.960 --> 00:10:00.320 Did you feel you're at it? 169 00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:04.000 to going south during the day before that, you know? 170 00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:05.640 No. 171 00:10:05.640 --> 00:10:08.120 It was actually really surprising. 172 00:10:08.120 --> 00:10:09.800 OK. 173 00:10:09.800 --> 00:10:12.760 And it was very reactionary. 174 00:10:12.760 --> 00:10:17.320 I wish I would have exhibited. 175 00:10:17.320 --> 00:10:19.760 It was a stressful moment for me because of what 176 00:10:19.760 --> 00:10:22.920 I was doing in the moment. 177 00:10:22.920 --> 00:10:25.280 And the sort of, I was up on a ladder 178 00:10:25.280 --> 00:10:26.360 and I was doing something. 179 00:10:26.360 --> 00:10:27.960 You know when you're holding your body 180 00:10:28.080 --> 00:10:30.320 and you're trying to, you can't hold your body up 181 00:10:30.320 --> 00:10:32.680 with your hands and you're working on something, 182 00:10:32.680 --> 00:10:34.280 but you're leaning forward. 183 00:10:34.280 --> 00:10:37.640 So now you're using your core to actually hold yourself up. 184 00:10:37.640 --> 00:10:40.000 And you're not doing this very well. 185 00:10:40.000 --> 00:10:42.360 And you need a third hand. 186 00:10:42.360 --> 00:10:44.720 It was one of those tasks. 187 00:10:44.720 --> 00:10:47.520 And then I got freaked out because she 188 00:10:47.520 --> 00:10:50.720 came around the corner in that position. 189 00:10:50.720 --> 00:10:53.240 So it was totally reactionary. 190 00:10:53.240 --> 00:10:56.920 But I'm wondering why I had to take another step. 191 00:10:59.560 --> 00:11:00.320 And that's on me. 192 00:11:03.080 --> 00:11:09.840 And I'm not saying that I actually have an issue. 193 00:11:09.840 --> 00:11:11.000 Like I have an anger issue. 194 00:11:11.000 --> 00:11:12.160 Like I just had this thing. 195 00:11:12.160 --> 00:11:15.320 I mean, I just reacted. 196 00:11:15.320 --> 00:11:21.200 And then I did something to really harm my wife. 197 00:11:21.200 --> 00:11:22.720 So quite honestly, it doesn't really 198 00:11:22.720 --> 00:11:24.680 matter even what the intention was. 199 00:11:24.680 --> 00:11:26.760 Because I wasn't mad at her. 200 00:11:26.760 --> 00:11:29.120 I was just surprised. 201 00:11:29.120 --> 00:11:32.200 But yet it happened. 202 00:11:32.200 --> 00:11:35.680 So it's one of those situations where like it happened so fast, 203 00:11:35.680 --> 00:11:37.760 I don't even know. 204 00:11:37.760 --> 00:11:39.680 And it wasn't a ramp up from like, oh, I 205 00:11:39.680 --> 00:11:40.920 was really feeling frustrated. 206 00:11:40.920 --> 00:11:41.960 I got some bad news. 207 00:11:41.960 --> 00:11:43.400 And then I just took it out on her. 208 00:11:43.400 --> 00:11:46.160 And it wasn't anything like that. 209 00:11:46.160 --> 00:11:49.600 May I step in here for a moment, David? 210 00:11:49.600 --> 00:11:53.520 As a counselor, I recognize this all too well, 211 00:11:53.520 --> 00:11:55.480 especially being a cop as well, too. 212 00:11:55.480 --> 00:11:58.320 It's called the fight and flight syndrome. 213 00:11:58.320 --> 00:12:01.400 And you've got to remember that that part of the brain 214 00:12:01.400 --> 00:12:05.720 in which it was affected at that very moment, it's stimulated. 215 00:12:05.720 --> 00:12:07.640 And since it's stimulated, it takes time 216 00:12:07.640 --> 00:12:10.040 for it to run its course. 217 00:12:10.040 --> 00:12:14.680 That's why we tend to either make excuses about what after. 218 00:12:14.680 --> 00:12:16.200 But it is a real thing. 219 00:12:17.000 --> 00:12:20.480 And couples have to recognize that. 220 00:12:20.480 --> 00:12:22.680 I know how many times I've been caught off guard. 221 00:12:22.680 --> 00:12:25.320 And I just put my hands up and says, well, come bring it on. 222 00:12:25.320 --> 00:12:31.440 But because it makes you go into that realm. 223 00:12:31.440 --> 00:12:33.720 But the point again here as well, too, 224 00:12:33.720 --> 00:12:35.840 is we've got to recognize, number one, 225 00:12:35.840 --> 00:12:38.160 recognize what it did to ourselves, 226 00:12:38.160 --> 00:12:39.920 how we react to things like that. 227 00:12:39.920 --> 00:12:43.560 Some people will just run away. 228 00:12:43.560 --> 00:12:45.120 Other people will sit there and fight. 229 00:12:45.160 --> 00:12:48.160 David, it sounds like you're a fighter. 230 00:12:48.160 --> 00:12:50.920 And so when you're ready to fight something like that, 231 00:12:50.920 --> 00:12:54.480 your whole being is involved, including your mouth. 232 00:12:54.480 --> 00:12:56.640 It's not always what's in the heart. 233 00:12:56.640 --> 00:12:59.680 Because we'll try to evaluate this one to death. 234 00:12:59.680 --> 00:13:02.360 But we have to say it for what it was. 235 00:13:02.360 --> 00:13:03.720 You got scared. 236 00:13:03.720 --> 00:13:07.720 You went into the fight and flight situation. 237 00:13:07.720 --> 00:13:09.360 And what came out is what came out. 238 00:13:09.360 --> 00:13:11.560 We have to recognize that and accept 239 00:13:11.560 --> 00:13:15.600 that on both parties, husband and wife. 240 00:13:15.600 --> 00:13:18.560 And then after that, it's after that adrenaline 241 00:13:18.560 --> 00:13:20.720 has been withdrawn. 242 00:13:20.720 --> 00:13:24.120 And it does take some people, it takes hours, not just moments. 243 00:13:24.120 --> 00:13:25.480 That's the moment you would say, hold on. 244 00:13:25.480 --> 00:13:27.880 I just said something I shouldn't have said. 245 00:13:27.880 --> 00:13:30.080 I am sorry as best as I can right now. 246 00:13:30.080 --> 00:13:31.880 But can we talk about this later? 247 00:13:31.880 --> 00:13:36.080 Because I'm still on this adrenaline attack right now. 248 00:13:36.080 --> 00:13:37.080 It was made for us. 249 00:13:37.080 --> 00:13:39.080 God put it within us. 250 00:13:39.080 --> 00:13:41.440 And it's something that isn't always bad. 251 00:13:42.320 --> 00:13:46.240 It's just how do we deal with the whole thing after the fact? 252 00:13:46.240 --> 00:13:47.080 True. 253 00:13:47.080 --> 00:13:48.960 And that's where we're coming to. 254 00:13:48.960 --> 00:13:52.640 Can we get down on our, after the adrenaline has come in 255 00:13:52.640 --> 00:13:55.480 and we set a time with our spouse and say, listen, 256 00:13:55.480 --> 00:13:56.880 can we meet this time? 257 00:13:56.880 --> 00:13:58.880 I want to explain. 258 00:13:58.880 --> 00:14:00.640 I don't want to give excuses. 259 00:14:00.640 --> 00:14:02.560 Just want to explain. 260 00:14:02.560 --> 00:14:03.400 Yeah. 261 00:14:03.400 --> 00:14:04.560 And then when you begin to explain, 262 00:14:04.560 --> 00:14:05.520 you get down on one knee. 263 00:14:05.520 --> 00:14:08.760 You always get always under them, not above them. 264 00:14:08.800 --> 00:14:09.800 You always go to a knee. 265 00:14:09.800 --> 00:14:12.080 You got always lower than them 266 00:14:12.080 --> 00:14:14.640 because you never want to lord over a situation like this 267 00:14:14.640 --> 00:14:16.040 to anybody, including your children. 268 00:14:16.040 --> 00:14:17.000 This can be used for your children. 269 00:14:17.000 --> 00:14:19.200 Never lord it over when you're about to have 270 00:14:19.200 --> 00:14:21.120 to make an apology. 271 00:14:21.120 --> 00:14:21.960 Yeah. 272 00:14:21.960 --> 00:14:22.960 Because after it's been said, 273 00:14:22.960 --> 00:14:24.920 you got time to recollect your thoughts. 274 00:14:24.920 --> 00:14:26.800 You can, what you thought, what didn't, 275 00:14:26.800 --> 00:14:29.160 because it's not about, oh, I said this. 276 00:14:29.160 --> 00:14:30.000 No, you said this. 277 00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:32.600 No, but that, that is just a, that's just, 278 00:14:32.600 --> 00:14:33.560 that's a cockfight. 279 00:14:33.560 --> 00:14:35.400 That's all that is. 280 00:14:35.400 --> 00:14:36.240 Yeah. 281 00:14:36.560 --> 00:14:40.160 And in a marriage, we learn how to, 282 00:14:40.160 --> 00:14:42.560 how our partners react to certain things. 283 00:14:42.560 --> 00:14:44.720 We grow from that one. 284 00:14:44.720 --> 00:14:45.600 Yeah. 285 00:14:45.600 --> 00:14:46.440 And then we say- 286 00:14:46.440 --> 00:14:47.760 That's good. 287 00:14:47.760 --> 00:14:49.840 So we get together and we just say, 288 00:14:49.840 --> 00:14:52.760 listen, sweetheart, I'm ready to talk. 289 00:14:52.760 --> 00:14:55.760 To begin with, I'm going to sit at your feet 290 00:14:57.160 --> 00:15:00.160 to let you know that I'm not lording, I'm not me. 291 00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:06.920 excuses here but I just sincerely came back to apologize for what not only my 292 00:15:06.920 --> 00:15:12.280 reaction but what the words came out and hopefully you know me well enough to know 293 00:15:12.280 --> 00:15:18.360 that's not my heart that was a jerk reaction and I've come to good I'm so 294 00:15:18.360 --> 00:15:23.320 sorry that should never happen I can't say it's going to be correct in the 295 00:15:23.320 --> 00:15:28.160 future because you can't say that you don't know but you can say can you help 296 00:15:28.160 --> 00:15:34.280 me walk through this one can you forgive me and can we pray together and 297 00:15:34.280 --> 00:15:42.080 just to bring peace back into this hole yeah now that's good and a couple of 298 00:15:42.080 --> 00:15:50.280 things I like what you said there was sorry I'm just picking up something is 299 00:15:50.280 --> 00:15:57.240 to answer even Chris's question you know like I can't tell you what I would have 300 00:15:57.240 --> 00:16:00.200 done differently had to you know quite do it all over again or whatever like 301 00:16:00.200 --> 00:16:05.960 that's completely theoretic because it's not even possible right and and I don't 302 00:16:05.960 --> 00:16:10.400 even know that there is any better situation because it's like like Kenton 303 00:16:10.400 --> 00:16:15.080 said it just happened and it's actually what happens afterwards is actually more 304 00:16:15.080 --> 00:16:22.680 important than even what what did happen which leads me into another story I want 305 00:16:22.680 --> 00:16:25.760 to say and we don't have to be finished with this section because it just might 306 00:16:25.760 --> 00:16:29.080 be more questions comments or whatever like that on that and I I don't want to 307 00:16:29.080 --> 00:16:33.200 get back to that but I want to move forward because I want to get in 308 00:16:33.200 --> 00:16:41.880 discussion with you guys about this I just came from a mastermind retreat 309 00:16:41.880 --> 00:16:51.560 that's where I was in in in Cabo San Lucas and over the weekend and it was 310 00:16:51.560 --> 00:16:57.480 tremendous it was incredible but the mastermind group that I'm a part of we 311 00:16:57.480 --> 00:17:06.839 spent at least two years or more contending to be vulnerable and some of 312 00:17:06.839 --> 00:17:10.319 the things that Kenton was talking about with regard to like the relationship and 313 00:17:10.319 --> 00:17:16.720 the fact that it happened and analyzing you can analyze why you talk about this 314 00:17:16.720 --> 00:17:19.680 and you can make excuses and whatever or you can even just stick with the facts 315 00:17:19.760 --> 00:17:23.119 and whatever you can even argue about it you know this is which is what most 316 00:17:23.119 --> 00:17:26.319 people do and but you're right you got to come to it you got to come to a 317 00:17:26.319 --> 00:17:30.080 moment wherever that moment is it's level-headedness and you definitely need 318 00:17:30.080 --> 00:17:36.240 to have discussion that's level and equal and very fair you know in order to 319 00:17:36.240 --> 00:17:45.440 like work some of that stuff out and but the vulnerability that's required in 320 00:17:45.520 --> 00:17:51.880 order to have true relationship and of course marriage relationship being one 321 00:17:51.880 --> 00:17:58.840 of the ultimate if not the ultimate for a single individual I mean like you have 322 00:17:58.840 --> 00:18:02.160 lots of relationships in life but that one relationship is the ultimate right 323 00:18:02.160 --> 00:18:06.360 it's the most intimate it's the most connected and all that kind of stuff and 324 00:18:06.360 --> 00:18:13.340 but to even have that level of relationship in community in Christian 325 00:18:13.340 --> 00:18:21.180 fellowship is powerfully important and can be done and is missed greatly in the 326 00:18:21.180 --> 00:18:25.420 body of Christ in a lot of ways I mean I'm sure there's a lot of small groups 327 00:18:25.420 --> 00:18:28.340 that are great out there and they're doing really good work and all that kind 328 00:18:28.340 --> 00:18:34.020 of stuff but it doesn't serve a lot of the a lot of the body of Christ and in a 329 00:18:34.020 --> 00:18:40.860 way because people you know go to the church form and they don't go deeper in 330 00:18:40.860 --> 00:18:46.540 relationship why because a lot of reasons mainly fear for on on all 331 00:18:46.540 --> 00:18:49.340 different levels fear of this fear of that for objection fear of abandonment 332 00:18:49.340 --> 00:18:56.700 fear of vulnerability fear of you know whatever all the different things and in 333 00:18:56.700 --> 00:19:02.420 our mastermind it was really odd because this particular trip that we had we were 334 00:19:02.420 --> 00:19:08.940 inviting some new members in a different tier so they weren't necessarily the 335 00:19:08.940 --> 00:19:11.420 kind of group that we've been fellowshipping with for the last two and 336 00:19:11.420 --> 00:19:17.860 a half years or so and so they were just new to the group and we were having our 337 00:19:17.860 --> 00:19:21.980 third session this time and we were getting really vulnerable and 338 00:19:21.980 --> 00:19:25.220 transparent we were just going some deep and it wasn't like you know everybody 339 00:19:25.220 --> 00:19:28.860 was it wasn't like a big confession session it wasn't like that at all like 340 00:19:28.860 --> 00:19:33.660 we all know each other very well we all know each other very deeply you know so 341 00:19:33.660 --> 00:19:37.500 we all know our stuff it's not like you know we're you know there's a bunch of 342 00:19:37.500 --> 00:19:43.100 like weirdness going on right but we were definitely being just very 343 00:19:43.100 --> 00:19:49.260 vulnerable and you have to understand this room that I'm in in this mastermind 344 00:19:49.260 --> 00:19:57.700 these are not slouchy people these are not like these are a certain caliber of 345 00:19:57.700 --> 00:20:01.620 people that you know 346 00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:03.360 Sometimes you get in with a certain group, 347 00:20:03.360 --> 00:20:06.040 and this is the kind of groups where most of the time 348 00:20:06.040 --> 00:20:08.880 in these environments, people are trying to level up, 349 00:20:08.880 --> 00:20:11.520 trying to level up like B-Flex, you know, 350 00:20:11.520 --> 00:20:12.760 and do all this kind of stuff like, 351 00:20:12.760 --> 00:20:15.360 oh, I'm this, I'm that, blah, blah, blah. 352 00:20:15.360 --> 00:20:19.080 And that's not what we do at all in my mastermind. 353 00:20:20.640 --> 00:20:23.360 Matter of fact, vulnerability is where it's at. 354 00:20:23.360 --> 00:20:26.800 And that has created a level of connection 355 00:20:27.240 --> 00:20:31.260 that is, you know, very hard to, 356 00:20:33.120 --> 00:20:36.440 very hard to whittle down and destroy. 357 00:20:36.440 --> 00:20:38.000 And we have one of the new members 358 00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:41.880 after we're third sessions in, this is our last session, 359 00:20:41.880 --> 00:20:46.080 and somebody said, what did you learn this week? 360 00:20:46.080 --> 00:20:47.760 And this lady said, she goes, well, 361 00:20:47.760 --> 00:20:50.120 I learned that, you know, that my husband and I 362 00:20:50.120 --> 00:20:53.840 need to have some more connection, you know? 363 00:20:53.840 --> 00:20:56.160 And that was kind of, that's kind of a vulnerable statement. 364 00:20:56.200 --> 00:20:57.880 Now, in the context of our meeting, 365 00:20:57.880 --> 00:20:59.280 it's kind of not because we already 366 00:20:59.280 --> 00:21:00.280 have been talking about that. 367 00:21:00.280 --> 00:21:02.240 But sometimes if you're just talking about like that, 368 00:21:02.240 --> 00:21:03.560 just like in your church group, 369 00:21:03.560 --> 00:21:05.760 like somebody raised their hand and goes, 370 00:21:05.760 --> 00:21:09.300 hey, I need to have more connection with my husband. 371 00:21:09.300 --> 00:21:12.240 And you think of them as like really great, awesome people. 372 00:21:12.240 --> 00:21:14.880 Like that would be very awkward sometimes. 373 00:21:15.880 --> 00:21:19.620 You know what I'm trying to say in some circles? 374 00:21:19.620 --> 00:21:23.440 And then she prefaced it with, we love each other, 375 00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:25.440 we really do, we've been together for 20 years 376 00:21:25.440 --> 00:21:29.040 or more or whatever, but I just needed some more connection. 377 00:21:29.040 --> 00:21:32.160 And we stopped it right there with like, don't qualify it. 378 00:21:33.920 --> 00:21:35.840 Now hear what I'm saying. 379 00:21:35.840 --> 00:21:37.480 Don't qualify it. 380 00:21:37.480 --> 00:21:40.960 Don't qualify it by saying, oh, we're in love. 381 00:21:40.960 --> 00:21:42.400 We've been together for so many years. 382 00:21:42.400 --> 00:21:44.760 We've been like, don't qualify it, just say, 383 00:21:44.760 --> 00:21:47.720 I learned that my husband and I have some disconnecting 384 00:21:47.720 --> 00:21:49.080 and we need to connect more. 385 00:21:49.080 --> 00:21:53.200 That's like powerful because of the level of vulnerability. 386 00:21:53.200 --> 00:21:54.920 Instead of trying to qualify it, 387 00:21:54.920 --> 00:21:57.120 like, because nobody was trying to assume 388 00:21:57.120 --> 00:21:58.280 you don't love your husband. 389 00:21:58.280 --> 00:22:00.560 Nobody was trying to assume that you have like marriage problems 390 00:22:00.560 --> 00:22:02.400 so bad that you're ready to get divorced. 391 00:22:02.400 --> 00:22:04.280 Nobody was assuming that. 392 00:22:04.280 --> 00:22:06.640 So it doesn't need to be qualified, 393 00:22:06.640 --> 00:22:11.640 but the level of transparency and the level of vulnerability 394 00:22:13.600 --> 00:22:17.440 creates an opportunity for that lady 395 00:22:17.440 --> 00:22:19.880 and the rest of us to go deeper. 396 00:22:23.320 --> 00:22:24.680 And I know that's uncomfortable. 397 00:22:24.680 --> 00:22:29.520 I know that's hard to hear because we don't, 398 00:22:29.520 --> 00:22:32.560 we always want to, we have, it's just as people 399 00:22:32.560 --> 00:22:35.480 and especially as good people, church people, 400 00:22:35.480 --> 00:22:37.480 we always want to qualify things. 401 00:22:37.480 --> 00:22:40.760 You know, I'm this, but you know, I'm this over here. 402 00:22:40.760 --> 00:22:44.000 I'm okay, but you know, I just have this one little issue 403 00:22:44.000 --> 00:22:47.000 and that's not being completely transparent, 404 00:22:48.120 --> 00:22:49.400 completely vulnerable. 405 00:22:50.360 --> 00:22:53.840 That's kind of covering and that's kind of protecting. 406 00:22:53.840 --> 00:22:56.320 And that's kind of like, I'll show you this, 407 00:22:56.320 --> 00:22:58.960 but I'm like, I want you to know that I'm bigger over, 408 00:22:58.960 --> 00:23:00.520 you know what I'm saying? 409 00:23:00.520 --> 00:23:05.520 So that doesn't lend for there to be a depth 410 00:23:07.240 --> 00:23:12.240 of relationship that's necessary in this fellowship. 411 00:23:15.280 --> 00:23:17.480 That's why I started tonight with this, like, 412 00:23:17.680 --> 00:23:18.920 guys, I screwed up. 413 00:23:20.760 --> 00:23:22.880 Now, after I've told you all the facts, 414 00:23:22.880 --> 00:23:24.640 some of you may be thinking, well, I don't know, 415 00:23:24.640 --> 00:23:26.000 maybe it wasn't that bad. 416 00:23:26.000 --> 00:23:27.400 Maybe it was, you know, maybe it was, you know, 417 00:23:27.400 --> 00:23:30.960 considering all the, you consider all the variables, right? 418 00:23:30.960 --> 00:23:32.360 But I'm not trying to make excuses like that. 419 00:23:32.360 --> 00:23:33.720 I'm like, no, this is bad. 420 00:23:33.720 --> 00:23:35.360 It's not good. 421 00:23:35.360 --> 00:23:40.160 And I'm having to like fix this in my relationship. 422 00:23:41.840 --> 00:23:44.800 And so I'm taking it as it is, trying to be vulnerable 423 00:23:44.800 --> 00:23:46.240 and trying to be transparent. 424 00:23:47.640 --> 00:23:52.640 And so my question to you tonight, guys, is, 425 00:23:55.520 --> 00:23:59.480 what, there's a statement I heard over the weekend too. 426 00:24:00.760 --> 00:24:03.840 Oh, this is where the story was I was going. 427 00:24:05.200 --> 00:24:06.280 Here's the story. 428 00:24:07.440 --> 00:24:08.840 I told you about our mastermind. 429 00:24:08.840 --> 00:24:09.800 I told you we can be vulnerable. 430 00:24:09.800 --> 00:24:12.600 And then I told you about the lady who mentioned the thing. 431 00:24:12.600 --> 00:24:14.800 And then she got sort of corrected, like, 432 00:24:14.800 --> 00:24:17.960 hey, don't cover it, right? 433 00:24:19.040 --> 00:24:24.000 And then immediately after she said what she said, 434 00:24:24.000 --> 00:24:26.400 another guy, now you have to understand the context 435 00:24:26.400 --> 00:24:27.240 of what I'm saying. 436 00:24:27.240 --> 00:24:30.440 We have just had this incredible weekend, transparent. 437 00:24:30.440 --> 00:24:33.160 We're having, not only we're having like lots of like 438 00:24:33.160 --> 00:24:35.520 God encounters and supernatural times 439 00:24:35.520 --> 00:24:38.040 and worship moments and transparency, 440 00:24:38.040 --> 00:24:40.840 but we're having tons of fun as well. 441 00:24:40.840 --> 00:24:42.840 Like we are having a blast. 442 00:24:43.800 --> 00:24:47.680 Like, and it is amazing that this is just the mixture 443 00:24:47.680 --> 00:24:49.320 of all of that, right? 444 00:24:50.400 --> 00:24:54.360 And this one guy goes, he goes, yeah, 445 00:24:56.760 --> 00:25:00.080 can you, but if you're progressing in your relationship. 446 00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:06.720 with the Lord, doesn't that mean that you're progressing in the relationship with your 447 00:25:06.720 --> 00:25:12.440 husband and your wife, or husband or your wife? 448 00:25:12.440 --> 00:25:18.320 And he sort of make a statement and he was also asking a question and it was very curious 449 00:25:18.320 --> 00:25:23.640 because in the moment, after all of this like great time and transparency and everybody's 450 00:25:23.640 --> 00:25:29.520 like sharing and all that, he makes a statement that sounds, what? 451 00:25:29.520 --> 00:25:34.760 Does anybody reading in between the lines based on the same, he says, yeah, but Arch, 452 00:25:34.760 --> 00:25:40.720 if you're growing in the Lord, in your relationship with the Lord, you know, can you be out of 453 00:25:40.720 --> 00:25:43.720 balance with your wife? 454 00:25:43.720 --> 00:25:44.720 Can you be out of balance? 455 00:25:44.720 --> 00:25:45.720 You know, does anybody? 456 00:25:45.720 --> 00:25:46.720 Like inherent? 457 00:25:46.720 --> 00:25:47.720 Huh? 458 00:25:47.720 --> 00:25:53.480 Like, do you mean that he meant to say like you're inherently getting close to your wife 459 00:25:53.480 --> 00:25:55.520 if you're getting closer to God? 460 00:25:55.520 --> 00:25:56.520 Yes. 461 00:25:56.520 --> 00:25:57.520 Okay. 462 00:25:57.520 --> 00:25:58.520 Like those things are synonymous. 463 00:25:58.520 --> 00:26:01.240 Gotcha. 464 00:26:01.240 --> 00:26:05.320 Anybody reading between the lines on this and hearing anything like why that would be 465 00:26:05.320 --> 00:26:10.920 spiritual bypass kind of because it's the, you can be with God and still hurt somebody 466 00:26:10.920 --> 00:26:14.280 and still be wrong in horizontal relationship. 467 00:26:14.280 --> 00:26:16.800 It feels like a spiritual bypass. 468 00:26:16.800 --> 00:26:18.280 Okay. 469 00:26:18.280 --> 00:26:19.280 Anybody else? 470 00:26:19.280 --> 00:26:23.360 I guess that's what you see. 471 00:26:23.360 --> 00:26:29.640 Anybody see anything wrong with that statement? 472 00:26:29.640 --> 00:26:31.520 Say the statement again, David. 473 00:26:31.520 --> 00:26:35.200 Sound like he was saying she's full of shit, kind of, and kind of call her out a little 474 00:26:35.200 --> 00:26:36.200 bit, maybe. 475 00:26:36.200 --> 00:26:40.920 No, this is just one of our new, this is one of our, no, no, no, again, let me just create 476 00:26:40.920 --> 00:26:43.200 the context again. 477 00:26:43.200 --> 00:26:44.200 New participant. 478 00:26:44.200 --> 00:26:49.120 The lady, she says what she says about her husband and then tries to cover a little bit 479 00:26:49.120 --> 00:26:51.480 and then another new person. 480 00:26:51.480 --> 00:26:52.880 So this was not a leader. 481 00:26:53.400 --> 00:26:54.600 This was not a long time member. 482 00:26:54.600 --> 00:26:57.840 This was another new person that makes the statement. 483 00:26:57.840 --> 00:27:03.360 He says, but aren't, but it, but aren't you, but you know, I feel like I'm growing in Christ 484 00:27:03.360 --> 00:27:11.040 and I'm making connections, you know, like, and because of that, I can't be out of relationship 485 00:27:11.040 --> 00:27:12.040 with my wife. 486 00:27:12.040 --> 00:27:13.040 It's awfully assumptive. 487 00:27:13.040 --> 00:27:14.040 It's assumptive. 488 00:27:14.040 --> 00:27:15.040 Right. 489 00:27:15.040 --> 00:27:21.640 Because, I mean, if you're assuming that you get grow closer to Christ, if she's not doing 490 00:27:21.640 --> 00:27:26.400 the same thing, it doesn't, it doesn't predicate, predicate you coming closer together. 491 00:27:26.400 --> 00:27:34.520 It doesn't, it's, yeah, it's so, I mean, each person's got to be going up that same thread 492 00:27:34.520 --> 00:27:37.840 and walking together just because you're going closer to the Lord doesn't mean you're going 493 00:27:37.840 --> 00:27:38.840 closer to each other. 494 00:27:38.840 --> 00:27:41.880 I mean, you can actually be going farther apart. 495 00:27:41.880 --> 00:27:42.960 Could be. 496 00:27:42.960 --> 00:27:43.960 It sounds works-based. 497 00:27:43.960 --> 00:27:47.960 It sounds works-based. 498 00:27:47.960 --> 00:27:54.080 Here is, because you all weren't in the room, let me kind of just shed some more light on 499 00:27:54.080 --> 00:27:58.480 this because I want to make this point. 500 00:27:58.480 --> 00:28:05.880 One of our leaders got up at that moment and said, and said this after the man said that, 501 00:28:05.880 --> 00:28:11.080 and the statement was, now see the religious spirit wants to come in. 502 00:28:11.080 --> 00:28:15.520 Good one. 503 00:28:15.520 --> 00:28:21.520 The religious spirit wants to come in because what the man was saying, and I can share some 504 00:28:21.520 --> 00:28:23.080 other context, but I'm not going to do that. 505 00:28:23.080 --> 00:28:26.200 But what the man, you're going to have to take my word for this. 506 00:28:26.200 --> 00:28:32.860 What the man was saying was, is all of you all spent the last three days being vulnerable 507 00:28:32.860 --> 00:28:37.880 and you know, and willing to be just like laying it out there and being, you know, even 508 00:28:37.880 --> 00:28:42.120 corrected and even like brought up and challenged, you know, like not even correct, but just 509 00:28:42.120 --> 00:28:45.200 challenged, like, Hey, let me challenge what you're saying there, you know? 510 00:28:45.880 --> 00:28:49.120 And this guy doesn't even attempt to be vulnerable. 511 00:28:49.120 --> 00:28:53.320 He just puts it out there like I'm progressing with the Lord. 512 00:28:53.320 --> 00:28:57.440 And therefore my relationship with my wife is great and perfect and wonderful. 513 00:28:57.440 --> 00:29:03.720 And you all are, I don't know what you all are doing, but I'm just doing great. 514 00:29:03.720 --> 00:29:07.160 That's basically what was happening in that moment. 515 00:29:07.160 --> 00:29:13.920 And here is the religious spirit, not even attempting to be vulnerable, comes in and 516 00:29:13.920 --> 00:29:20.640 starts like, well, I don't know about you guys, but everything's fine with me. 517 00:29:20.640 --> 00:29:24.600 And we're like, bro, are you reading the room at all? 518 00:29:24.600 --> 00:29:25.680 Are you even here? 519 00:29:25.680 --> 00:29:28.280 Have you been here the last three days? 520 00:29:28.280 --> 00:29:30.000 Do you even know what you're talking about? 521 00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:36.320 And this guy, the background context of this guy has been like, he's well, he has tremendous 522 00:29:36.320 --> 00:29:37.320 businesses. 523 00:29:37.320 --> 00:29:42.960 He's got, it is technically his second marriage, which I'm not holding that against him. 524 00:29:43.560 --> 00:29:49.040 But he has all these things and he's been flexing all weekend. 525 00:29:49.040 --> 00:29:51.040 And we've just been kind of like, okay, bro, whatever. 526 00:29:51.040 --> 00:29:55.080 Like nobody's impressed. 527 00:29:55.080 --> 00:29:58.840 But then ends the conference with this statement and we're like. 528 00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:04.400 And then, guess what our reaction in our community was? 529 00:30:08.340 --> 00:30:11.700 Anybody wanna guess what our collective reaction 530 00:30:11.700 --> 00:30:14.980 after we've been not only vulnerable for the last three days 531 00:30:14.980 --> 00:30:16.780 but we've spent two and a half years 532 00:30:16.780 --> 00:30:19.760 trying to make authentic connections 533 00:30:19.760 --> 00:30:23.900 with each other in community, what was our reaction? 534 00:30:23.900 --> 00:30:27.940 You were in dismay about this religious dude. 535 00:30:27.940 --> 00:30:29.100 No. 536 00:30:29.100 --> 00:30:31.800 I feel like you, based on what I know of you so far, 537 00:30:31.800 --> 00:30:33.680 you would have extended an olive branch to him 538 00:30:33.680 --> 00:30:37.420 to invite him into a deeper level of vulnerability. 539 00:30:37.420 --> 00:30:38.260 Technically, yes. 540 00:30:38.260 --> 00:30:39.580 Okay, that did happen. 541 00:30:39.580 --> 00:30:40.580 What else? 542 00:30:40.580 --> 00:30:43.540 What was our initial feeling reaction? 543 00:30:43.540 --> 00:30:45.440 Bill, or did you feel lonely with him? 544 00:30:45.440 --> 00:30:47.660 Like you were, you know, didn't, 545 00:30:47.660 --> 00:30:49.260 you weren't really getting to know him. 546 00:30:49.260 --> 00:30:50.460 He was just- 547 00:30:50.460 --> 00:30:51.300 A little bit. 548 00:30:54.140 --> 00:30:56.460 Like forgiveness emotion? 549 00:30:56.460 --> 00:30:57.740 Okay, a little bit of that. 550 00:30:57.740 --> 00:31:01.020 But I'm looking for something extremely specific. 551 00:31:01.020 --> 00:31:02.440 Maybe a little dismay? 552 00:31:03.560 --> 00:31:04.400 Dismayed, yeah. 553 00:31:04.400 --> 00:31:05.980 I mean, a little bit, but not so much. 554 00:31:05.980 --> 00:31:06.900 And earlier. 555 00:31:08.300 --> 00:31:09.980 Not so much. 556 00:31:09.980 --> 00:31:13.580 I will tell you, our initial reaction, 557 00:31:13.580 --> 00:31:16.780 because our collectiveness as a group, 558 00:31:16.780 --> 00:31:18.780 because we had some new people with us, 559 00:31:18.780 --> 00:31:19.980 but our collection is, 560 00:31:19.980 --> 00:31:23.140 those of them have been journeying for a while, 561 00:31:23.140 --> 00:31:26.300 our immediate reaction in our hearts, 562 00:31:26.300 --> 00:31:28.100 that wasn't necessarily said until later 563 00:31:28.100 --> 00:31:31.060 and because of it kind of played out in context, 564 00:31:31.060 --> 00:31:34.980 but we shared about it sidebar after the fact. 565 00:31:34.980 --> 00:31:37.740 And we were like, hey, that guy, you know, 566 00:31:37.740 --> 00:31:41.660 I was really surprised at that statement. 567 00:31:41.660 --> 00:31:44.820 And then our reactions to each other were, 568 00:31:44.820 --> 00:31:47.820 man, I hope that guy gets some breakthrough. 569 00:31:49.180 --> 00:31:52.980 I hope that that guy can see what we're trying to do here 570 00:31:52.980 --> 00:31:54.680 as a community. 571 00:31:55.680 --> 00:31:59.480 And gets beyond, gets past that. 572 00:32:01.600 --> 00:32:03.960 We were seeing him not as someone, 573 00:32:03.960 --> 00:32:06.840 as he wanted to be seen, I'm accomplished. 574 00:32:06.840 --> 00:32:08.480 I have a great relationship with the Lord. 575 00:32:08.480 --> 00:32:10.200 I have no problems with my wife. 576 00:32:10.200 --> 00:32:11.880 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 577 00:32:11.880 --> 00:32:13.640 I've got three business offices. 578 00:32:13.640 --> 00:32:15.360 I live in Hawaii. 579 00:32:15.360 --> 00:32:18.440 We were not seeing that as like, oh man, you're great. 580 00:32:18.440 --> 00:32:20.480 Like we wanna know who you are. 581 00:32:20.480 --> 00:32:23.240 No, we had compassion. 582 00:32:24.880 --> 00:32:27.400 We had a moment of like, bro, 583 00:32:27.400 --> 00:32:29.400 if you could just be with us a little bit longer, 584 00:32:29.400 --> 00:32:32.560 if you could get past this little rebuke, 585 00:32:32.560 --> 00:32:34.040 because he got rebuked later 586 00:32:34.040 --> 00:32:35.120 and that was another thing. 587 00:32:35.120 --> 00:32:39.200 But anyway, we were like, 588 00:32:39.200 --> 00:32:42.080 man, we would love to see you have a breakthrough. 589 00:32:42.080 --> 00:32:44.960 We would love to see you come into the fellowship 590 00:32:44.960 --> 00:32:48.660 as we've been contending for for the last many years. 591 00:32:50.520 --> 00:32:52.960 And the reason I'm laying all this out guys 592 00:32:52.960 --> 00:32:57.280 is because this is true community. 593 00:32:57.280 --> 00:32:59.660 This is true relationship. 594 00:32:59.660 --> 00:33:03.720 This isn't just a bunch of people getting together 595 00:33:03.720 --> 00:33:05.520 and patting each other on the back 596 00:33:05.520 --> 00:33:07.400 or even in this, in like what we're trying to do 597 00:33:07.400 --> 00:33:09.000 in our group. 598 00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:10.560 We are building connections. 599 00:33:10.560 --> 00:33:12.960 We are building, like I feel like connected 600 00:33:12.960 --> 00:33:14.880 to each one of you, even though many of you 601 00:33:14.880 --> 00:33:16.900 have never met even in person. 602 00:33:16.900 --> 00:33:18.880 But I feel like I know you well enough. 603 00:33:18.880 --> 00:33:20.480 I feel like I know your heart. 604 00:33:20.480 --> 00:33:22.280 I feel like I know something about you. 605 00:33:22.280 --> 00:33:24.520 I feel like I know where you're going 606 00:33:24.520 --> 00:33:27.720 in the sense that like we're champions for each other. 607 00:33:28.600 --> 00:33:30.520 It's powerful. 608 00:33:30.520 --> 00:33:33.080 Imagine if we could actually be in person 609 00:33:33.080 --> 00:33:35.200 every Monday night or whatever like that. 610 00:33:35.200 --> 00:33:37.160 We can't because we just live all different things 611 00:33:37.160 --> 00:33:39.280 and maybe we should get together at some point 612 00:33:39.280 --> 00:33:41.160 and we probably will. 613 00:33:41.160 --> 00:33:43.840 But I guess what I'm trying to say is 614 00:33:45.240 --> 00:33:50.080 the level of contending for vulnerability in relationship 615 00:33:50.080 --> 00:33:51.640 is extremely important. 616 00:33:51.640 --> 00:33:53.280 It's powerful. 617 00:33:53.280 --> 00:33:54.960 It's life-changing. 618 00:33:54.960 --> 00:33:57.060 It's what people need and want. 619 00:33:58.160 --> 00:34:01.960 It's where the body of Christ should be. 620 00:34:03.600 --> 00:34:05.400 And we need to contend for it. 621 00:34:06.760 --> 00:34:09.880 We need to contend for each other within this group. 622 00:34:09.880 --> 00:34:13.560 And we need to contend for it in our own relationships. 623 00:34:13.560 --> 00:34:16.120 And we need to contend for it in our families 624 00:34:16.120 --> 00:34:17.760 and in our local communities. 625 00:34:18.600 --> 00:34:21.239 You know, to the chagrin of many other people 626 00:34:21.239 --> 00:34:23.880 because a lot of people don't like it 627 00:34:23.880 --> 00:34:25.040 and they won't like it. 628 00:34:26.960 --> 00:34:28.360 And like some people, 629 00:34:28.360 --> 00:34:31.040 like I feel like Abram's naturally kind of this kind of dude 630 00:34:31.040 --> 00:34:33.719 where it's like, hey, I'm just, I'm vulnerable. 631 00:34:33.719 --> 00:34:35.520 I'm just like, I'm kind of an open book type thing. 632 00:34:35.520 --> 00:34:37.440 Like, you know, and there's maybe some things 633 00:34:37.440 --> 00:34:40.159 that you might try to protect yourself a little bit. 634 00:34:40.159 --> 00:34:42.960 Abram like in some humor and some stuff like that, 635 00:34:42.960 --> 00:34:45.920 you know, which is true, admit it. 636 00:34:45.920 --> 00:34:47.239 But at the same time, I think like, 637 00:34:47.239 --> 00:34:48.960 you're one of those dudes that kind of almost like 638 00:34:48.960 --> 00:34:50.920 is naturally kind of like, you know, like whatever. 639 00:34:50.920 --> 00:34:53.800 Like, you know, he's his own, like cool. 640 00:34:53.800 --> 00:34:56.320 Like, you know, I can still connect 641 00:34:56.320 --> 00:34:59.320 or I can still have a conversation or have coffee, whatever. 642 00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:02.640 but we all have our hang-ups. 643 00:35:02.640 --> 00:35:05.880 So the question I wanna ask tonight, guys, 644 00:35:05.880 --> 00:35:10.880 is there was a statement that was made over the weekend too 645 00:35:12.320 --> 00:35:14.120 that, write this down, somebody write this in the chat, 646 00:35:14.120 --> 00:35:17.620 fear equals trust. 647 00:35:19.000 --> 00:35:23.380 Fear equals trust. 648 00:35:25.960 --> 00:35:29.640 Now immediately, some of you faith-filled, 649 00:35:29.640 --> 00:35:32.520 Bible-believing, Holy Ghost-filled Christians 650 00:35:32.520 --> 00:35:35.440 are gonna be like, no, that's not good. 651 00:35:35.440 --> 00:35:37.640 Fear's bad, fear's terrible. 652 00:35:37.640 --> 00:35:39.760 Fear, no, we cast out fear. 653 00:35:39.760 --> 00:35:44.320 We don't live by, you know, we live by faith. 654 00:35:44.320 --> 00:35:46.160 We don't live by fear. 655 00:35:46.160 --> 00:35:47.920 And I'm with you, I am there with you. 656 00:35:47.920 --> 00:35:49.640 I hate fear. 657 00:35:49.640 --> 00:35:53.300 I've been taught that fear is the enemy, and it is. 658 00:35:54.280 --> 00:35:56.360 And hate is not the opposite of love, 659 00:35:56.360 --> 00:35:58.360 but fear is the opposite of love. 660 00:35:59.800 --> 00:36:03.200 But when you think of statements like fearing the Lord 661 00:36:03.200 --> 00:36:05.800 is the beginning of wisdom, right? 662 00:36:05.800 --> 00:36:07.120 We understand that. 663 00:36:07.120 --> 00:36:10.080 And we can break that down eschatologically, 664 00:36:10.080 --> 00:36:11.960 and we can break that down theologically, 665 00:36:11.960 --> 00:36:14.160 and we can look at what the root word of the, 666 00:36:14.160 --> 00:36:15.560 what the word fear means there, 667 00:36:15.560 --> 00:36:17.400 but it's not the same as whatever in the elsewhere. 668 00:36:17.400 --> 00:36:19.740 We can talk about all that if we want to. 669 00:36:19.740 --> 00:36:21.640 But if you just kinda look at this and trying to just like, 670 00:36:21.640 --> 00:36:24.240 trying to just grab onto some like real truth here, 671 00:36:25.640 --> 00:36:28.160 whatever you fear, in other words, fear equals trust, 672 00:36:28.160 --> 00:36:33.120 whatever you fear is what you put your trust in. 673 00:36:35.160 --> 00:36:37.480 Whatever you're concerned about, 674 00:36:37.480 --> 00:36:39.640 whatever your fear and whatever you're like, 675 00:36:39.640 --> 00:36:43.200 ooh, like, hmm, whatever gets your attention 676 00:36:44.600 --> 00:36:47.320 is what you put your trust in. 677 00:36:49.040 --> 00:36:51.680 So then statements like fearing the Lord 678 00:36:51.680 --> 00:36:52.740 is the beginning of wisdom 679 00:36:52.740 --> 00:36:54.780 start to make a little bit more sense, 680 00:36:54.780 --> 00:36:57.320 because it's like, I fear the Lord. 681 00:36:57.320 --> 00:37:02.320 I fear what may happen in his presence. 682 00:37:03.600 --> 00:37:07.080 Everybody in scripture who met the Lord in person 683 00:37:08.160 --> 00:37:11.800 was pretty, you know, scared shitless, basically. 684 00:37:12.800 --> 00:37:14.040 They fell on their face. 685 00:37:15.100 --> 00:37:17.140 They hid themselves. 686 00:37:18.000 --> 00:37:21.140 Hello, these are all the scriptural stories, you know them. 687 00:37:21.140 --> 00:37:22.940 So don't act like, oh, well, if I met God, 688 00:37:22.940 --> 00:37:24.920 it would just be a one big like bro fest. 689 00:37:24.920 --> 00:37:28.420 We would be slapping, you know, high five, love you, daddy. 690 00:37:28.420 --> 00:37:32.800 No, I think you'd be pretty, pretty awestruck. 691 00:37:34.780 --> 00:37:38.600 And when you think about, when you fear equals trust, 692 00:37:38.600 --> 00:37:41.080 whatever you fear, whatever you're concerned about 693 00:37:41.080 --> 00:37:42.960 is what you put your trust in. 694 00:37:42.960 --> 00:37:44.280 And you start applying that, okay, 695 00:37:44.280 --> 00:37:48.320 so let's take it out of the realm of like meeting God. 696 00:37:48.320 --> 00:37:51.040 Let's talk about like, what are your greatest fears? 697 00:37:51.040 --> 00:37:52.220 What are the greatest things? 698 00:37:52.220 --> 00:37:53.160 What's the thing? 699 00:37:53.160 --> 00:37:55.880 If you were honest and could be transparent 700 00:37:55.880 --> 00:37:58.360 and not trying to cover anything, 701 00:37:58.360 --> 00:38:01.700 what is the thing that you fear the most? 702 00:38:02.960 --> 00:38:05.840 What is a couple of things that you fear? 703 00:38:05.840 --> 00:38:07.480 And so if you wanna put it in the chat, 704 00:38:07.480 --> 00:38:09.040 like if anybody wants to say like, 705 00:38:09.040 --> 00:38:10.700 what is it I really like, 706 00:38:10.700 --> 00:38:11.960 what is I'm really concerned about? 707 00:38:11.960 --> 00:38:14.940 What does I really fear like in relationships? 708 00:38:16.040 --> 00:38:18.040 What does it really fear like in my life? 709 00:38:18.040 --> 00:38:20.640 Like, what does I really worry about and fear about? 710 00:38:21.640 --> 00:38:22.800 Right? 711 00:38:22.800 --> 00:38:24.500 So start putting that in the chat. 712 00:38:30.640 --> 00:38:35.200 Another way to put this is whatever you're afraid of losing, 713 00:38:36.440 --> 00:38:38.200 that could be another fear. 714 00:38:38.200 --> 00:38:40.480 What is it you're afraid of losing? 715 00:38:43.040 --> 00:38:46.000 What is the thing that you're afraid of losing 716 00:38:46.000 --> 00:38:48.600 if you X, fill in the blank. 717 00:38:48.600 --> 00:38:50.380 If you do this, if you go here, 718 00:38:51.120 --> 00:38:52.900 if you are in a relationship. 719 00:38:55.040 --> 00:38:57.380 What if you get into a relationship and then, 720 00:39:00.220 --> 00:39:04.240 you know, some people are not getting in relationships 721 00:39:04.240 --> 00:39:06.840 with another person because of fear. 722 00:39:06.840 --> 00:39:07.680 Fear of what? 723 00:39:21.380 --> 00:39:25.540 Yeah, okay, so dying alone and unloved. 724 00:39:25.540 --> 00:39:26.480 Wow, powerful. 725 00:39:27.380 --> 00:39:29.100 Married for 10 years and ends. 726 00:39:30.100 --> 00:39:32.820 Oh, getting married for 10 years and then it ends 727 00:39:32.820 --> 00:39:36.100 and then the kids have to live out a suit. 728 00:39:36.100 --> 00:39:38.920 Yeah, a case like a court case. 729 00:39:38.920 --> 00:39:39.760 Okay. 730 00:39:41.780 --> 00:39:43.100 Marriage and the same thing happening 731 00:39:43.100 --> 00:39:44.020 like it happened before. 732 00:39:44.020 --> 00:39:45.860 Okay, yeah, fear of what happened before. 733 00:39:45.860 --> 00:39:48.180 It happened this way before, why can't it happen again? 734 00:39:48.180 --> 00:39:49.020 I'm fearful of that. 735 00:39:49.020 --> 00:39:49.840 Yeah, it's good. 736 00:39:50.320 --> 00:39:52.480 Why is financial destruction if married? 737 00:39:54.560 --> 00:39:57.720 Why is financial destruction synonymous with being married? 738 00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:08.020 here I'll speak up to that well well it's your comment yeah so the person I 739 00:40:08.020 --> 00:40:13.780 was married to before she's exactly the opposite of me I'm very analytical data 740 00:40:13.780 --> 00:40:18.580 is my thing you know stuff like that she on the other hand is anything but she's 741 00:40:18.580 --> 00:40:24.260 more the creative analog type so if it came to installing an app on the phone 742 00:40:24.260 --> 00:40:28.100 it was no-go if it came to using an app to help with 743 00:40:28.100 --> 00:40:34.660 finances nope for her reconciling finances is eyeballing statements so 744 00:40:34.660 --> 00:40:40.660 yeah it's that it's that kind of order and women are chaos and that's actually 745 00:40:40.660 --> 00:40:45.820 somewhat of the male and feminine yin-yang it actually kind of is that's 746 00:40:45.820 --> 00:40:51.100 there's some historical universal sort of things to that but it also is in a 747 00:40:51.100 --> 00:40:58.860 good way sometimes we need some chaos I'm afraid kids will never know Jesus 748 00:40:58.860 --> 00:41:07.180 Wow that's really interesting I'm afraid of being I'm just interesting coming 749 00:41:07.180 --> 00:41:12.020 from you Daniel as well I'm afraid of being constantly rejected after every 750 00:41:12.020 --> 00:41:15.860 first date and this pattern happens until I die okay if you're being left 751 00:41:15.860 --> 00:41:22.540 behind of anything being social hierarchy okay left behind and in 752 00:41:22.540 --> 00:41:26.540 society I get it in relationship sim for getting married looking back and 753 00:41:26.540 --> 00:41:31.700 thinking I knew I wasn't supposed to do this out fear yeah fear of regret made a 754 00:41:31.700 --> 00:41:38.700 bad decision made yeah scarring scaring away my future wife my past my rage and 755 00:41:38.700 --> 00:41:44.660 my injuries okay can't be future finances marrying the wrong woman being 756 00:41:44.660 --> 00:41:47.620 rejected what I fear is being left behind in anything yeah afraid of 757 00:41:47.620 --> 00:41:52.940 loneliness that's good anybody I didn't see this in here I could be wrong me I 758 00:41:52.940 --> 00:42:00.940 missed it over my fear is fear of abandonment you know my first wife left 759 00:42:00.940 --> 00:42:09.300 and you know I've told you that all this before that on paper it looked like it 760 00:42:09.300 --> 00:42:14.220 was all her fault and in the context of you know the church I was in and the 761 00:42:14.220 --> 00:42:17.420 community I was in all kind of stuff everybody looked at me like oh David you 762 00:42:17.420 --> 00:42:20.420 know poor David this happened to him blah blah blah his wife left and 763 00:42:20.420 --> 00:42:24.740 deconstructed all that kind of stuff but you know over the years I've owned the 764 00:42:24.740 --> 00:42:28.620 fact that it was a hundred percent my fault and 100% her fault it wasn't like 765 00:42:28.620 --> 00:42:34.220 I'm trying to say oh yeah I didn't I didn't accept that lie like oh yeah my 766 00:42:34.220 --> 00:42:37.620 wife did me dirty she left me blah blah blah I didn't get bitter and mad and 767 00:42:37.620 --> 00:42:42.500 retarded about it because and I don't mean retarded disparagingly I mean like 768 00:42:42.500 --> 00:42:46.980 I didn't slow me down to start to keep thinking that it was my wife's fault 769 00:42:46.980 --> 00:42:52.460 because that would not have served me well at all just blaming my wife for my 770 00:42:52.460 --> 00:42:58.060 divorce like that doesn't teach me anything doesn't learn me anything that 771 00:42:58.060 --> 00:43:02.180 doesn't help me in my future relationships that doesn't help my kids 772 00:43:02.180 --> 00:43:10.060 that doesn't help anything you know and then it certainly doesn't help me grow 773 00:43:10.100 --> 00:43:17.260 because I can't see my own weaknesses if I'm start just blame everybody so if 774 00:43:17.260 --> 00:43:20.420 you're in your life and most of the things that you're complaining about 775 00:43:20.420 --> 00:43:24.060 that are wrong in your life or as a result of somebody else or something 776 00:43:24.060 --> 00:43:31.420 else or some other reason other than at least half you if not more then you're 777 00:43:31.420 --> 00:43:38.940 looking at it wrong and if you feel that stinging it's supposed to and I mean 778 00:43:38.940 --> 00:43:47.140 that harsh you're looking at it wrong you're not seeing this correctly and the 779 00:43:47.140 --> 00:43:50.060 thing about it is it's not it's not meant for you to take that stick and 780 00:43:50.060 --> 00:43:53.860 then start beating you so you're not supposed to beat yourself up either you 781 00:43:53.860 --> 00:43:58.540 just supposed to own your shit and go yep that's right now how do I get out of 782 00:43:58.540 --> 00:44:04.340 this and there's a pattern there's enough information there's enough 783 00:44:04.340 --> 00:44:10.060 inspiration there's enough like umph there's enough like things that you can 784 00:44:10.060 --> 00:44:16.620 subject yourself to to get yourself out of this situation and into health that's 785 00:44:16.620 --> 00:44:21.140 what we're trying to do here we're not trying to like call things out for the 786 00:44:21.140 --> 00:44:24.820 sake of calling things out and making people feel like shit we're calling 787 00:44:24.820 --> 00:44:28.420 things out so that you can be aware of them so you could deal with them and so 788 00:44:28.420 --> 00:44:39.220 you can go and so you can be all that you can be that's what it's about that's 789 00:44:39.220 --> 00:44:44.740 powerful that's awesome that is life-infusing but I also understand 790 00:44:44.740 --> 00:44:50.180 being afraid of that because I too for so long was afraid of being real was 791 00:44:50.180 --> 00:44:55.780 afraid of being vulnerable as afraid of people knowing the truth but you can't 792 00:44:55.780 --> 00:44:58.620 be afraid of that 793 00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.520 You also can't be so truthful that you're just constantly beating yourself up for the past because that's 794 00:45:06.560 --> 00:45:08.320 Not good either 795 00:45:08.320 --> 00:45:10.240 That's not the point 796 00:45:10.240 --> 00:45:12.240 This is not Alcoholics Anonymous 797 00:45:13.120 --> 00:45:17.840 I know people have gotten really help a lot of Alcoholics Anonymous, but continuing to call yourself an addict 798 00:45:18.560 --> 00:45:22.160 After you literally have been made a new person in Christ 799 00:45:23.040 --> 00:45:25.040 it's just 800 00:45:25.840 --> 00:45:27.840 That doesn't work either 801 00:45:28.800 --> 00:45:35.280 I'm not saying hey, it hasn't helped people. I'm just saying that continue to call yourself an addict continue calling yourself 802 00:45:35.920 --> 00:45:37.920 You know a piece of crap 803 00:45:37.920 --> 00:45:42.000 Because you messed up because you screwed up because you're human for crying out loud 804 00:45:42.720 --> 00:45:44.720 Does not fix your problem either 805 00:45:46.560 --> 00:45:49.920 Moving forward in health and wholeness and wellness and strength 806 00:45:50.800 --> 00:45:54.160 and and allowing other people in a and and and 807 00:45:54.880 --> 00:45:56.320 and being 808 00:45:56.320 --> 00:45:57.760 um 809 00:45:57.840 --> 00:46:02.580 I say this word too much now vulnerable enough to to to be in a relationship 810 00:46:04.000 --> 00:46:06.720 Gives you the strength to move on 811 00:46:12.240 --> 00:46:19.280 So every single one of these things guys I want you to start thinking of um, you know, I was writing this, you know 812 00:46:20.880 --> 00:46:25.200 I I'm thinking of like single guys, but this is true with married people too. I mean, I mean 813 00:46:25.760 --> 00:46:27.760 You're afraid of losing your independence 814 00:46:28.880 --> 00:46:32.180 Are you afraid of losing your possessions? 815 00:46:33.840 --> 00:46:37.600 I'm i'm not kidding. You don't know you don't know these people but they're actually in our community 816 00:46:37.680 --> 00:46:40.640 but you don't really know them because you know, our community's just 817 00:46:41.920 --> 00:46:43.920 A bigger in a lot of ways, but anyway 818 00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:48.320 We had a couple that actually got married in our community and then they got divorced. Why? 819 00:46:48.960 --> 00:46:50.960 because of a cat 820 00:46:51.440 --> 00:46:56.100 She had a cat that she didn't want to get rid of and she wasn't necessarily the cleanest housekeeper 821 00:46:56.560 --> 00:47:00.880 And this guy was super tidy and he had more things so it made sense for her to move in with him 822 00:47:01.360 --> 00:47:03.360 But she brought her cat 823 00:47:03.360 --> 00:47:07.600 And he couldn't get over that because he tried to and he's like I will try to get over the cat 824 00:47:07.760 --> 00:47:12.960 But I can't go over the cat and she wouldn't let go of the cat. So they're now divorced because of a cat 825 00:47:17.360 --> 00:47:19.360 And you look at that like 826 00:47:19.760 --> 00:47:23.680 And you look at that like yeah, that's crazy that's funny that's weird it's real 827 00:47:26.880 --> 00:47:34.560 They would not get further in their relationship beyond a dumb cat 828 00:47:36.400 --> 00:47:38.400 Both ways 829 00:47:39.520 --> 00:47:42.720 And and they actually got married that's the thing it's like 830 00:47:43.360 --> 00:47:47.200 You guys knew this before you got married. Why did you actually get married? 831 00:47:48.000 --> 00:47:52.480 Like I know our program is like last year single we're trying to encourage marriage we're trying to get people together 832 00:47:52.720 --> 00:47:57.440 We're trying to like encourage them as best they can like it doesn't take much seriously. Just do your hard work 833 00:47:57.520 --> 00:47:59.520 It doesn't take that much and just get married 834 00:47:59.520 --> 00:48:01.520 Like we're trying to say that a lot of ways 835 00:48:01.920 --> 00:48:05.680 But you all knew this before you got married and you did it anyway 836 00:48:07.600 --> 00:48:10.640 And now it became such a problem that you're not married anymore 837 00:48:12.240 --> 00:48:14.720 Now I will say this they're not young people 838 00:48:15.600 --> 00:48:19.520 They're a little bit older so i'm maybe a little bit of benefited out like 839 00:48:21.120 --> 00:48:22.720 Sometimes it's just 840 00:48:22.720 --> 00:48:24.320 You know hard to 841 00:48:24.320 --> 00:48:25.840 change 842 00:48:25.840 --> 00:48:27.440 I don't I don't know 843 00:48:27.440 --> 00:48:33.440 and my heart breaks for them because it's like now it's just like whatever like all the stuff that you have to undo and all 844 00:48:33.440 --> 00:48:35.440 the things you have to go through and the 845 00:48:35.520 --> 00:48:37.760 The rigmarole and just like that's just like 846 00:48:38.640 --> 00:48:40.640 That's tough man. I hate that 847 00:48:41.520 --> 00:48:42.800 but 848 00:48:43.760 --> 00:48:47.280 So what i'm trying to say is like, you know, if you have fear of like losing out like 849 00:48:47.840 --> 00:48:49.360 Oh my god, my house is going to be different 850 00:48:49.360 --> 00:48:53.360 You know, I have to move into somewhere else or I have to like, you know, what if what if this happens? 851 00:48:53.360 --> 00:48:56.240 What if that happens like what's it's going to be like having to live with another person? 852 00:48:57.280 --> 00:48:59.280 um 853 00:48:59.760 --> 00:49:02.800 And the money thing the health thing those are all real issues 854 00:49:03.680 --> 00:49:05.680 You know when you're young they always say 855 00:49:05.920 --> 00:49:10.320 Well two is better than one because you know when you're young you don't have money and she doesn't have money 856 00:49:10.320 --> 00:49:14.320 But together you have a little bit more money because you know, at least you can kind of cobble things together 857 00:49:14.800 --> 00:49:16.320 And it's better together 858 00:49:16.320 --> 00:49:19.280 Sometimes that isn't the case necessarily when it's a little bit older 859 00:49:19.360 --> 00:49:23.440 You're all down the road and things have changed and you got some careers and then some things are a little bit like oh 860 00:49:23.440 --> 00:49:25.440 That's a little risky 861 00:49:25.440 --> 00:49:29.360 Get in relation to marriage relationship with somebody and I understand those are very real things 862 00:49:30.480 --> 00:49:32.640 But you have to be honest about those things 863 00:49:33.360 --> 00:49:37.440 And deal with them directly. There are there are answers to all of these things guys 864 00:49:38.400 --> 00:49:42.080 And some of them some of these things on this list that you're saying 865 00:49:42.880 --> 00:49:44.800 it's funny because 866 00:49:44.800 --> 00:49:47.600 It's just like it's a track record it happened before 867 00:49:48.240 --> 00:49:50.240 So what if it happens again? 868 00:49:50.720 --> 00:49:56.080 And you have to challenge that and go just because it happened before does not mean it happens again 869 00:49:57.120 --> 00:49:59.300 You're a different person. You're a better person 870 00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.540 you know better. 871 00:50:02.540 --> 00:50:04.300 That's the point where you start working on yourself. 872 00:50:04.300 --> 00:50:07.100 Like, how can I make sure in a healthy way, 873 00:50:07.100 --> 00:50:08.600 not beat myself up, 874 00:50:08.600 --> 00:50:11.200 but how can I make sure that this doesn't happen again? 875 00:50:11.200 --> 00:50:12.360 Can I be a better husband? 876 00:50:12.360 --> 00:50:13.780 Can I be a better person? 877 00:50:13.780 --> 00:50:15.780 If you were married before and you're concerned 878 00:50:15.780 --> 00:50:18.460 about all the things happening in your first marriage 879 00:50:18.460 --> 00:50:19.660 are gonna happen in your second marriage, 880 00:50:19.660 --> 00:50:21.940 I've dealt with that a lot. 881 00:50:21.940 --> 00:50:23.820 I've dealt with that a lot, 882 00:50:23.820 --> 00:50:26.100 but I've also worked through a lot of it too. 883 00:50:26.100 --> 00:50:30.160 And our marriage now is more healthy than it's ever been, 884 00:50:31.640 --> 00:50:36.320 you know, in spite of what happened today, seriously. 885 00:50:38.580 --> 00:50:40.120 And so there's hope. 886 00:50:48.280 --> 00:50:50.840 Let me say this as a way of encouragement. 887 00:50:50.840 --> 00:50:53.640 Does anybody know the story of Samson? 888 00:50:54.640 --> 00:50:55.480 I do. 889 00:50:55.480 --> 00:50:58.440 And Samson and his strength, 890 00:50:59.800 --> 00:51:02.120 and he was in the lap of Delilah, 891 00:51:03.040 --> 00:51:04.880 and he lost all of his strength, 892 00:51:04.880 --> 00:51:07.640 but then he got it back one last time. 893 00:51:07.640 --> 00:51:09.640 But there's a story previous to all that, 894 00:51:09.640 --> 00:51:11.480 like Sam, the well-known Samson, 895 00:51:11.480 --> 00:51:16.480 of Samson finding the honey in the lion. 896 00:51:18.440 --> 00:51:19.680 Anybody know that story? 897 00:51:19.760 --> 00:51:21.080 Mike, tell us a little bit about that story. 898 00:51:21.080 --> 00:51:23.800 Can you recap that just to say, 899 00:51:23.800 --> 00:51:25.000 you should go ahead and ask. 900 00:51:25.000 --> 00:51:26.920 Well, so he was cruising by, 901 00:51:26.920 --> 00:51:28.440 I think he was going to see a chick, 902 00:51:28.440 --> 00:51:30.000 but I don't remember what it was. 903 00:51:30.000 --> 00:51:30.840 It could have been. 904 00:51:30.840 --> 00:51:32.240 But then he saw that- 905 00:51:32.240 --> 00:51:33.760 Samson had that issue. 906 00:51:33.760 --> 00:51:38.280 Yeah, he had, there was bees that were in a lion's mouth. 907 00:51:38.280 --> 00:51:40.920 They made a nest in a lion's mouth. 908 00:51:40.920 --> 00:51:41.760 Yeah. 909 00:51:41.760 --> 00:51:42.600 And as an Azurite, 910 00:51:42.600 --> 00:51:44.760 he wasn't supposed to touch anything dead. 911 00:51:44.760 --> 00:51:47.680 So he went by it, and he found the honey, 912 00:51:47.920 --> 00:51:49.600 so he went by it, 913 00:51:49.600 --> 00:51:51.520 and then I think it was on the way back, 914 00:51:51.520 --> 00:51:53.320 he's like, yeah, I'm gonna get some honey, 915 00:51:53.320 --> 00:51:55.040 and that's, yeah. 916 00:51:55.040 --> 00:51:56.920 So he kind of blew it. 917 00:51:56.920 --> 00:51:59.240 He blew it in a lot of ways, but yeah. 918 00:51:59.240 --> 00:52:00.080 Yeah. 919 00:52:01.120 --> 00:52:04.120 Well, there's a little bit of an idea though in that, 920 00:52:04.120 --> 00:52:07.600 where in that story, 921 00:52:10.440 --> 00:52:15.440 sometimes God does bring a little bit of a sweetness 922 00:52:18.560 --> 00:52:21.040 in a previous battle that you've had. 923 00:52:23.360 --> 00:52:27.120 So it was, in one way, it was out of order 924 00:52:27.120 --> 00:52:31.440 because of the Old Testament context of the Nazarite vow, 925 00:52:31.440 --> 00:52:35.120 but at the same time, there was a certain provision in it 926 00:52:35.120 --> 00:52:37.360 that was sort of outside the law. 927 00:52:37.360 --> 00:52:39.560 And this is one of the things that David did. 928 00:52:39.560 --> 00:52:44.560 He found a way to be sort of like subvert the law 929 00:52:44.880 --> 00:52:46.680 and operate in kingdom. 930 00:52:47.000 --> 00:52:48.240 And he was rewarded for it 931 00:52:48.240 --> 00:52:50.920 because God saw him as a man after his own heart. 932 00:52:52.320 --> 00:52:55.880 And it's interesting because I'll go back to the man 933 00:52:55.880 --> 00:52:59.120 who asked the question about, can you progress? 934 00:52:59.120 --> 00:53:02.880 Like, isn't you progressing with the Lord, 935 00:53:02.880 --> 00:53:04.280 being in harmony with your wife? 936 00:53:04.280 --> 00:53:06.480 Doesn't it just automatically mean like, 937 00:53:06.480 --> 00:53:08.880 because like I'm progressing with the Lord, 938 00:53:08.880 --> 00:53:11.240 so therefore I don't have anything wrong with my wife. 939 00:53:11.240 --> 00:53:13.600 And the answer to that is, yes, you can. 940 00:53:13.600 --> 00:53:17.000 You can absolutely be progressing with the Lord 941 00:53:17.000 --> 00:53:19.800 in your relationship and progressing in greatness 942 00:53:19.800 --> 00:53:21.920 and in sweetness and sort of with the Lord 943 00:53:21.920 --> 00:53:24.120 and be out of fellowship with the one 944 00:53:24.120 --> 00:53:28.520 that you're intimate with, your wife being this person. 945 00:53:28.520 --> 00:53:30.600 Hello, King David. 946 00:53:33.080 --> 00:53:37.120 King David, we all know what King David did. 947 00:53:37.120 --> 00:53:38.120 Does anybody know? 948 00:53:40.120 --> 00:53:42.720 He looked down when he was not in battle 949 00:53:42.720 --> 00:53:43.840 and he should have been out of battle, 950 00:53:43.840 --> 00:53:44.960 wasn't where he was supposed to be, 951 00:53:44.960 --> 00:53:47.320 looked down, saw a naked woman, 952 00:53:47.320 --> 00:53:50.880 desired to have him, her as his wife, 953 00:53:50.880 --> 00:53:53.520 took her and in order to take her, 954 00:53:53.520 --> 00:53:55.640 also killed a man in the process. 955 00:53:57.400 --> 00:53:58.880 Like that's despicable. 956 00:53:59.920 --> 00:54:01.560 That's horrific. 957 00:54:01.560 --> 00:54:03.400 That's barbaric. 958 00:54:03.400 --> 00:54:08.400 That is like the most gangster thing that you can do. 959 00:54:10.280 --> 00:54:12.120 Literally just steal another man's wife 960 00:54:12.120 --> 00:54:15.200 and then kill him to get rid of the evidence 961 00:54:15.200 --> 00:54:16.440 and cover it up. 962 00:54:17.840 --> 00:54:20.400 And then when he was confronted about it, 963 00:54:20.400 --> 00:54:23.240 was so angry, he said, this man must die. 964 00:54:23.240 --> 00:54:26.520 And Nathan said, you are that man. 965 00:54:28.320 --> 00:54:29.160 Whoa. 966 00:54:30.560 --> 00:54:32.840 But in the record of scripture, 967 00:54:32.840 --> 00:54:35.080 at the time that David was anointed king, 968 00:54:35.960 --> 00:54:38.280 it says that the reason that David was anointed king 969 00:54:38.280 --> 00:54:41.840 was because he was found to be a man after God's own heart 970 00:54:42.680 --> 00:54:46.960 was replacing Saul because Saul had lost his anointing 971 00:54:46.960 --> 00:54:50.120 to be king anymore because of his disobedience. 972 00:54:50.120 --> 00:54:51.880 And you're like, well, David was disobedient. 973 00:54:51.880 --> 00:54:54.200 Like how does that work? 974 00:54:54.200 --> 00:54:55.760 And then in Acts, 975 00:54:57.240 --> 00:55:00.600 it states for the record in the New Testament, 976 00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:07.040 Testament after we already know see like the record of saying that Dave was a man after God's own heart was before we knew what? 977 00:55:07.040 --> 00:55:10.440 David in chronological order before we knew what David did what he did as 978 00:55:11.760 --> 00:55:16.360 King right you following what I'm saying, but in Acts as 979 00:55:17.400 --> 00:55:18.760 a way to 980 00:55:18.760 --> 00:55:20.760 Go back to the hallmarks of faith 981 00:55:21.280 --> 00:55:26.600 It repeats the words that says that God saw just like in 982 00:55:26.760 --> 00:55:29.140 In the days when God saw 983 00:55:29.800 --> 00:55:35.440 David was a man after God's own heart replacing Saul. It says that in Acts for the record 984 00:55:36.520 --> 00:55:39.460 After we already knew what David did 985 00:55:40.680 --> 00:55:44.340 So you can't tell me that you can't 986 00:55:45.120 --> 00:55:51.520 For be progressing in your relationship with the Lord and be dysfunctional in your human relationships 987 00:55:51.520 --> 00:55:53.520 You 988 00:55:55.120 --> 00:56:01.960 Can't be like, oh I'm all about Jesus. I'm all about good, but I just can't find I just can't seem to find harmony with other 989 00:56:01.960 --> 00:56:03.960 people 990 00:56:04.560 --> 00:56:09.000 Yeah, you can do that all day long bro and just be out of relationship 991 00:56:09.480 --> 00:56:13.200 The Bible even says if you love God, but yet hate your brother 992 00:56:14.440 --> 00:56:16.280 Truth is not in you 993 00:56:16.280 --> 00:56:18.280 Like whoa, what? 994 00:56:18.800 --> 00:56:20.080 Oh 995 00:56:20.080 --> 00:56:25.640 Me and Jesus we just got going on and there's so many so many believers like that 996 00:56:28.440 --> 00:56:34.280 And I'm just I'm challenging that in you if if that's if that's hitting a thing in you 997 00:56:35.000 --> 00:56:37.000 Because I want to encourage you that 998 00:56:38.840 --> 00:56:42.160 It's not like you have to like stop progressing in your relationship with the Lord 999 00:56:44.040 --> 00:56:45.960 But you 1000 00:56:45.960 --> 00:56:47.960 want to learn how to 1001 00:56:48.280 --> 00:56:50.280 come into 1002 00:56:50.480 --> 00:56:52.480 relationship with others and 1003 00:56:53.040 --> 00:56:58.080 You and you're doing that. I don't want to I don't want to just I don't want to disparage and say you're not doing that 1004 00:56:59.080 --> 00:57:03.000 You wouldn't be here on this call if you weren't doing that 1005 00:57:03.680 --> 00:57:05.120 You know I'm saying 1006 00:57:05.120 --> 00:57:12.440 You wouldn't be on this call if you weren't interested in trying to be more vulnerable more open more like I'm working on myself 1007 00:57:12.440 --> 00:57:16.000 I'm working on relationships. I'm working on like what do I have to do to get out of my way? 1008 00:57:16.000 --> 00:57:22.320 So I'm just I want to say that by way of encouragement not by way of like, you know, you're terrible. I 1009 00:57:23.560 --> 00:57:28.880 started this whole thing out by being vulnerable to show you that being vulnerable and 1010 00:57:29.800 --> 00:57:33.320 Being the missing the mark isn't the end of your journey 1011 00:57:35.240 --> 00:57:37.240 Just because of things that happened before 1012 00:57:37.880 --> 00:57:43.120 Just because things aren't working out right now. That doesn't mean that's the end of your journey 1013 00:57:43.880 --> 00:57:47.760 There's way more to reach out for than you for to hold on to 1014 00:57:48.600 --> 00:57:52.760 So let go today of what's in your hand 1015 00:57:53.280 --> 00:58:00.560 Let go of fear. Let go of regret. Let go of I suck let go of 1016 00:58:02.080 --> 00:58:07.400 You know, this isn't working out my life isn't what I thought it was going to be at this moment in time 1017 00:58:07.400 --> 00:58:10.560 I'm such-and-such age. I thought it was going to be much different 1018 00:58:10.560 --> 00:58:18.400 Let go of that and move on in your heart work in community in your relationship 1019 00:58:20.960 --> 00:58:28.600 And move forward move past every limiting belief move past every issue of fear and 1020 00:58:29.960 --> 00:58:31.960 Develop the fear of the Lord 1021 00:58:32.480 --> 00:58:38.560 Because whatever you're afraid of losing or whatever you're afraid of not working out is what you trust in 1022 00:58:38.560 --> 00:58:44.800 So at the very least put your trust in the Lord and all that he has for you 1023 00:58:47.120 --> 00:58:49.800 There was a time I was a worship leader for 20 years guys 1024 00:58:49.800 --> 00:58:55.800 there was a time where I didn't want to be close to the Lord because I was so hurt and 1025 00:58:57.360 --> 00:59:02.080 I was losing out the entire time because I wasn't willing to be 1026 00:59:02.600 --> 00:59:06.560 You know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know 1027 00:59:06.560 --> 00:59:13.200 to be you know worship for or develop in my heart connection with God and 1028 00:59:14.520 --> 00:59:20.320 I was missing out on all the advancements that God was trying. He was trying to speak to me 1029 00:59:20.320 --> 00:59:23.840 He's trying to be gracious to me. He was trying to lead me into and 1030 00:59:24.640 --> 00:59:26.640 I was faltering 1031 00:59:28.120 --> 00:59:32.440 During my second marriage because I'd already lost it all wasn't like oh, I'm gonna lose it all 1032 00:59:32.440 --> 00:59:37.360 No, I'd already lost it all. I already had the bankruptcy. I already had the cars repossessed 1033 00:59:37.360 --> 00:59:40.320 I already had the divorce on my record 1034 00:59:40.320 --> 00:59:41.440 I already had 1035 00:59:41.440 --> 00:59:47.560 persona non grata at the big church that I was at that my whole identity was wrapped in and lost all that and was 1036 00:59:47.640 --> 00:59:49.800 Relegated to the back pew to say get out of here 1037 00:59:50.800 --> 00:59:52.080 and 1038 00:59:52.080 --> 00:59:56.600 Then I was still faltering and flailing and 1039 00:59:57.440 --> 00:59:59.960 wondering who I was and not 1040 01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:06.000 falling on the rock before the rock falls on me? 1041 01:00:10.080 --> 01:00:16.640 I don't know. I mean a lot of this sounds very discouraging and I'm not 1042 01:00:16.640 --> 01:00:20.320 trying to be discouraging at all. I'm trying to be very inspirational to you. 1043 01:00:20.320 --> 01:00:24.800 I'm sorry this is coming off really awkward but I hope you're getting it. 1044 01:00:25.680 --> 01:00:34.400 I hope that you can feel inspired in some way to like you know like even in business when we 1045 01:00:34.400 --> 01:00:41.680 started being more successful it wasn't because I was so inspired because I was like oh man I can 1046 01:00:41.680 --> 01:00:47.520 really do this. No it was somebody that ticked me off and it was someone that did something great 1047 01:00:47.520 --> 01:00:56.160 and I went damn it ah if that guy can do it I can do it. That's what made me take my first move. 1048 01:01:01.600 --> 01:01:11.520 And so I don't know if that inspires you. It was you know I'm not really a type A 1049 01:01:11.520 --> 01:01:16.640 charismatic kind of a dude. I'm just not at all. So none of that really impresses me. Like some 1050 01:01:16.640 --> 01:01:22.400 guys like hey man I'm like you know like shucking and jiving to do all that. Get out of here. 1051 01:01:23.680 --> 01:01:30.880 That does not do anything for me normally but sometimes I see an individual and they have a 1052 01:01:30.880 --> 01:01:37.520 certain like like they did something and I'm like I know that guy's just like me. Dang it he did it. 1053 01:01:38.240 --> 01:01:43.440 Man I'm done with this. I'm tired of being a loser. I'm not going to do this anymore. I'm going to go 1054 01:01:43.440 --> 01:01:53.200 for it and I had a breakthrough you know and yeah I kind of call myself a loser. I shouldn't do that 1055 01:01:54.320 --> 01:01:59.440 but it was it was it was transformative in the moment and I don't really call myself a loser 1056 01:01:59.440 --> 01:02:05.440 you know over and over and over again. So it's not like anyway here I'm trying to cover that but 1057 01:02:06.400 --> 01:02:07.120 it is what it is. 1058 01:02:10.160 --> 01:02:16.720 I don't know maybe maybe we can get some reaction. I don't want to go long long but I just want to 1059 01:02:16.720 --> 01:02:23.440 like if you're getting anything from this at least just raise your hand and say yeah I've something's 1060 01:02:23.440 --> 01:02:29.760 something's clicking something is pricking me something's helping something's like I want to 1061 01:02:29.760 --> 01:02:37.200 make a difference on a couple hands. Can I share something David? Go ahead David. 1062 01:02:38.160 --> 01:02:44.000 So I kind of look at it more as like an observation like from a judge at like a martial 1063 01:02:44.000 --> 01:02:50.400 arts competition. You're not saying oh you did this wrong this wrong this wrong this wrong. It's like 1064 01:02:50.400 --> 01:02:55.440 hey you can move that way. Can you also move this way? Can you try moving this way? Can you do the 1065 01:02:55.440 --> 01:03:01.760 form backward? Can you do it sideways? Can you do it with a 45 pound bar in your hand? It's an 1066 01:03:01.760 --> 01:03:10.720 invitation to projecting yourself into other ways and other methods of still chasing after God and 1067 01:03:10.720 --> 01:03:19.360 still building that union with God and just working on yourself. So let me ask you David. 1068 01:03:19.360 --> 01:03:24.320 You're saying this in sort of that analogy which is great. I think it's a good analogy. Let's go 1069 01:03:24.320 --> 01:03:31.360 back to your thing scaring away my future wife of my past my rage and my injuries. So how are you 1070 01:03:31.360 --> 01:03:37.920 going to come against that out of partnership with that out of connection with that 1071 01:03:40.080 --> 01:03:43.600 with what you're talking about? I'm not challenging you. I'm just I'm helping you 1072 01:03:43.600 --> 01:03:47.680 to like let's build a bridge. No it was actually I was actually going to start with that and then 1073 01:03:47.680 --> 01:03:53.360 you asked this recent question but so actually this past week and I've been hiking and spending 1074 01:03:53.360 --> 01:03:58.720 time with God for the last few months and yeah kind of just made me aware of and you know what 1075 01:03:58.720 --> 01:04:03.280 that's important not because you're hiking and spending time with God. You know why that's 1076 01:04:03.280 --> 01:04:15.520 important? Because I observed that. I've observed that. You've shown up enough times that we have 1077 01:04:15.520 --> 01:04:22.720 seen that. I've seen you on the mountain. I've seen your prayer. I've seen you doing it. I didn't have 1078 01:04:22.800 --> 01:04:27.040 to be told that. You didn't have to be like oh well I'm doing this and I'm doing this with the 1079 01:04:27.040 --> 01:04:32.000 Lord and I'm like progressing like that. You didn't have to like boast about it. I've seen it. 1080 01:04:32.960 --> 01:04:39.360 That's powerful. That's a powerful testimony that I know that about you because I've seen it. 1081 01:04:40.960 --> 01:04:47.680 Not because you told me. Kudos. So go ahead. You've been doing that and that's been doing what? 1082 01:04:47.680 --> 01:04:52.480 So that created a conversation between God and I, Holy Spirit and I that 1083 01:04:54.560 --> 01:04:59.840 I don't have good boundaries and I'm kind of more aware of that now and it's almost like 1084 01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:04.200 Like, even when I filled out my spirit mate match profile, 1085 01:05:04.200 --> 01:05:06.280 even part of the fear was involved in that. 1086 01:05:06.280 --> 01:05:08.040 I was like, oh, if I don't select everyone 1087 01:05:08.040 --> 01:05:12.000 from like four foot three to six foot 10, 1088 01:05:12.000 --> 01:05:13.200 I'm never gonna meet anyone. 1089 01:05:13.200 --> 01:05:17.400 If I don't select liberal, neoconservative, 1090 01:05:17.400 --> 01:05:20.700 whatever, polka dot, I'm not gonna meet someone. 1091 01:05:21.960 --> 01:05:23.920 But even further than that, 1092 01:05:26.040 --> 01:05:28.160 like even when I've gone out on dates in the past, 1093 01:05:28.200 --> 01:05:30.320 I've invited someone out hiking. 1094 01:05:30.320 --> 01:05:32.880 I've invited someone out to an adventure 1095 01:05:32.880 --> 01:05:34.880 or a crazy fun experience, 1096 01:05:34.880 --> 01:05:39.880 not recognizing how much it put me in an area of weakness. 1097 01:05:42.400 --> 01:05:47.360 Not just for myself and my date, like physical wise, 1098 01:05:47.360 --> 01:05:51.880 but also like how much it opened me up 1099 01:05:51.880 --> 01:05:56.120 to like stick my foot in my mouth, so to say. 1100 01:05:56.120 --> 01:05:57.720 Okay, because what you're saying 1101 01:05:57.720 --> 01:06:01.360 is because an initial date, 1102 01:06:01.360 --> 01:06:06.360 you want to be more like closer to the vest 1103 01:06:07.120 --> 01:06:10.320 and not be so just out there, no boundaries, whatever. 1104 01:06:10.320 --> 01:06:11.760 So the context of the date 1105 01:06:11.760 --> 01:06:15.200 lent you to be like more free 1106 01:06:15.200 --> 01:06:16.880 than what it is that you probably 1107 01:06:16.880 --> 01:06:18.800 should have been on a first date. 1108 01:06:18.800 --> 01:06:19.640 Absolutely. 1109 01:06:19.640 --> 01:06:20.920 Okay, exactly. 1110 01:06:20.920 --> 01:06:23.160 And then sort of like, I have no boundaries, 1111 01:06:23.160 --> 01:06:24.600 so if I have no boundaries, 1112 01:06:24.600 --> 01:06:26.720 then I'm just gonna scare away my future wife 1113 01:06:26.720 --> 01:06:28.640 because I'm just gonna share too much. 1114 01:06:28.640 --> 01:06:30.200 I'm gonna be too vulnerable. 1115 01:06:30.200 --> 01:06:32.720 I'm gonna be like too open book, whatever. 1116 01:06:32.720 --> 01:06:33.560 Okay. 1117 01:06:33.560 --> 01:06:37.100 Yeah, as for some of the other stuff in my past, 1118 01:06:38.280 --> 01:06:41.920 super deep into sexual sin for a long time. 1119 01:06:43.480 --> 01:06:44.320 It's stuff that I can only- 1120 01:06:44.320 --> 01:06:46.720 That doesn't have to identify you going forward. 1121 01:06:46.720 --> 01:06:49.120 I know you know that, but I'm just saying like- 1122 01:06:49.120 --> 01:06:52.160 It's just the, it's like the polar opposite of, 1123 01:06:52.160 --> 01:06:54.720 not opposite, but like polar end of, 1124 01:06:54.720 --> 01:06:56.400 oh, hey, here's a lesson in pornography. 1125 01:06:56.400 --> 01:06:58.720 And then there's all this stuff in the past. 1126 01:06:58.720 --> 01:06:59.560 Even though it's the past, it's just- 1127 01:06:59.560 --> 01:07:01.960 I think you would agree with me to say that 1128 01:07:02.840 --> 01:07:05.440 one of the greatest ways that you come out of identity 1129 01:07:05.440 --> 01:07:07.800 with that is just not being that 1130 01:07:07.800 --> 01:07:10.480 and being what your true identity is. 1131 01:07:10.480 --> 01:07:13.680 Like, it's not so much trying to get away from something 1132 01:07:13.680 --> 01:07:16.840 that was your identity or maybe still is at some point, 1133 01:07:16.840 --> 01:07:19.560 like, oh yeah, I still do, whatever. 1134 01:07:19.560 --> 01:07:20.400 I know it's not. 1135 01:07:20.400 --> 01:07:22.720 The best way for you to go away from that 1136 01:07:22.720 --> 01:07:26.320 is to go toward what your true identity is. 1137 01:07:26.320 --> 01:07:28.720 And that's, it's important to say your true identity 1138 01:07:28.720 --> 01:07:31.280 instead of saying an alternate identity. 1139 01:07:31.280 --> 01:07:33.320 Like, I want a new identity. 1140 01:07:33.320 --> 01:07:35.480 Actually, I think, because I think that's what we talk about 1141 01:07:35.480 --> 01:07:37.480 a lot in this community, 1142 01:07:37.480 --> 01:07:39.400 is instead of like trying to replace you 1143 01:07:39.400 --> 01:07:41.120 with an alternate identity, 1144 01:07:41.120 --> 01:07:43.920 like, I don't want that anymore, I want this. 1145 01:07:43.920 --> 01:07:45.440 You know, because people can do that too. 1146 01:07:45.440 --> 01:07:47.840 They can easily go, I don't want to be a loser, 1147 01:07:47.840 --> 01:07:48.960 so I'm just going to be a winner. 1148 01:07:48.960 --> 01:07:51.680 And a winner means that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, 1149 01:07:51.680 --> 01:07:54.760 you know, and then it may be like coming in agreement 1150 01:07:54.760 --> 01:07:58.680 with an identity that is not you either. 1151 01:07:59.680 --> 01:08:01.720 And the best version of yourself 1152 01:08:01.720 --> 01:08:04.640 is your true identity in Christ. 1153 01:08:04.640 --> 01:08:07.880 And that is fun, that is exciting, 1154 01:08:07.880 --> 01:08:11.440 that is sincere, that is powerful, 1155 01:08:11.440 --> 01:08:14.880 that is devout, that is all those things. 1156 01:08:15.880 --> 01:08:19.279 Sorry, my hands, you know what I'm saying? 1157 01:08:19.279 --> 01:08:22.479 So you're moving to, like, your karate analogy, 1158 01:08:22.479 --> 01:08:24.479 or whatever, I'm sorry, I didn't say it right, karate, 1159 01:08:24.479 --> 01:08:25.960 whatever it was, your analogy of like, 1160 01:08:25.960 --> 01:08:28.439 you can do that move, but what if you can do this move? 1161 01:08:28.439 --> 01:08:31.680 It's like, I'm just changing one thing for another thing. 1162 01:08:32.520 --> 01:08:37.439 I'm changing my false identity for my true identity. 1163 01:08:37.439 --> 01:08:39.840 Yeah, it's still the same martial art as it's just, 1164 01:08:39.840 --> 01:08:42.439 hey, instead of only looking this way, 1165 01:08:42.600 --> 01:08:45.120 now you're able to look this way and that way. 1166 01:08:45.120 --> 01:08:47.240 Now you're actually progressing in this direction. 1167 01:08:47.240 --> 01:08:48.080 In other words- 1168 01:08:48.080 --> 01:08:49.040 You're still a martial artist, 1169 01:08:49.040 --> 01:08:49.880 you're still a Christian, you're still- 1170 01:08:49.880 --> 01:08:52.240 In other words, you're still David Van Royen, 1171 01:08:53.240 --> 01:08:56.680 you're just seeing life and doing life differently. 1172 01:08:56.680 --> 01:08:57.800 Absolutely. 1173 01:08:57.800 --> 01:08:59.319 I love it. 1174 01:08:59.319 --> 01:09:00.920 I love it. 1175 01:09:00.920 --> 01:09:02.880 And I can see, I can see the change in you. 1176 01:09:02.880 --> 01:09:04.800 I mean, I've not known you long, 1177 01:09:04.800 --> 01:09:07.000 but I mean, I can just see even just, you know, 1178 01:09:07.000 --> 01:09:08.680 hanging out on these calls. 1179 01:09:08.680 --> 01:09:10.840 This is like the lowest form of, like, connection. 1180 01:09:10.840 --> 01:09:13.040 Like, we're on freaking Zoom. 1181 01:09:13.040 --> 01:09:14.840 Oh, I am sitting on the ground. 1182 01:09:14.840 --> 01:09:17.040 We have a certain level of connection and power 1183 01:09:17.040 --> 01:09:18.279 that's happening here. 1184 01:09:18.279 --> 01:09:21.520 The best we can do, and God's getting glory in it 1185 01:09:21.520 --> 01:09:24.200 because people's lives are changing. 1186 01:09:25.319 --> 01:09:27.520 We're getting better for it. 1187 01:09:29.600 --> 01:09:30.439 Thank you. 1188 01:09:30.439 --> 01:09:31.520 Thank you, David, for sharing. 1189 01:09:31.520 --> 01:09:34.279 Thank you for being vulnerable. 1190 01:09:35.479 --> 01:09:36.319 Thank you. 1191 01:09:37.160 --> 01:09:38.160 Still getting breakthrough? 1192 01:09:39.520 --> 01:09:41.720 Mike Anthony, you got your hands raised? 1193 01:09:41.720 --> 01:09:43.720 Yeah, I just wanted to circle back 1194 01:09:43.720 --> 01:09:45.920 to something I thought was really important. 1195 01:09:47.000 --> 01:09:49.319 So, you know, we were talking about fight or flight 1196 01:09:49.319 --> 01:09:52.120 and stuff, and a lot of times when you're fight or flight, 1197 01:09:53.120 --> 01:09:54.360 you're amygdala's firing, 1198 01:09:54.360 --> 01:09:56.640 so your memory's not working. 1199 01:09:56.640 --> 01:09:58.640 So when somebody's not working, 1200 01:09:58.640 --> 01:10:00.680 you're not getting the same results. 1201 01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:04.000 he says, you said this, the odds are they're right. And you're I 1202 01:10:00.680 --> 01:10:03.680 And so, you know, I think that's a big part of it. 1203 01:10:04.000 --> 01:10:06.840 mean, like, a lot of times you're wrong. So like to die on 1204 01:10:06.840 --> 01:10:10.920 those to die on that hill, you weren't you weren't cognizant, 1205 01:10:10.940 --> 01:10:16.840 you weren't working. And so I've seen a lot of pain in that way 1206 01:10:16.860 --> 01:10:19.840 with in that whole thing. So I just want you guys say you guys, 1207 01:10:20.120 --> 01:10:24.000 you own what you own, you didn't you. If you're if you're locked 1208 01:10:24.000 --> 01:10:27.200 in warrior mode, you put you might have said a lot of things 1209 01:10:27.200 --> 01:10:30.480 that you don't remember. And I just, but the key is not when 1210 01:10:30.480 --> 01:10:35.440 you blow it, it's how you make up for it. How you repair what 1211 01:10:35.440 --> 01:10:40.080 you do. And I can't and I love that you said you get lower, you 1212 01:10:40.080 --> 01:10:45.000 go low. And like the and like, I mean, because I you know, like 1213 01:10:45.000 --> 01:10:47.040 I bought it so many, you know, one of the reasons why I'm 1214 01:10:47.040 --> 01:10:50.320 really good at giving advice is because I've blown it so bad in 1215 01:10:50.320 --> 01:10:54.480 so many ways that I've learned how to like redo it. And you 1216 01:10:54.480 --> 01:10:57.680 know, it's not it's not whether it's like, are you going to get 1217 01:10:57.680 --> 01:11:00.200 back up? And are you going to own it? And are you gonna get a 1218 01:11:00.200 --> 01:11:03.600 crush it? Right? Are you gonna crush your ownership of what's 1219 01:11:03.600 --> 01:11:09.480 going on? And are you gonna repair? So um, yeah, so I just 1220 01:11:09.480 --> 01:11:12.360 I just wanted I just wanted to address that. Because I see it a 1221 01:11:12.360 --> 01:11:18.880 lot. And when people are like, in triggered situations, right? 1222 01:11:18.880 --> 01:11:24.280 My best friends. Why put in your fear? I didn't put in my fear. I 1223 01:11:24.280 --> 01:11:27.520 was trying to think of what my fear is. Do it. I'm not gonna 1224 01:11:27.520 --> 01:11:29.440 I'm not gonna go into a conversation. I just want you to 1225 01:11:29.440 --> 01:11:32.640 do it just for Oh, no. So I just you know, I think my fear is 1226 01:11:32.640 --> 01:11:37.840 that God isn't good. And he's not gonna show up. Wow. Really? 1227 01:11:38.240 --> 01:11:44.040 Yeah. Coming from you. Yeah. Mr. Mr. prophetic, Mr. Voice of 1228 01:11:44.040 --> 01:11:48.800 God. See, doesn't think God's gonna show up. I'm, I'm sort of 1229 01:11:48.800 --> 01:11:52.240 like gesturing a little bit with that. Because I'm like, I'm not 1230 01:11:52.240 --> 01:11:55.680 challenging you at all. I'm like, Whoa, okay. You want a 1231 01:11:55.680 --> 01:11:58.880 straight up honest, you know, it's like, I know that you're 1232 01:11:58.880 --> 01:12:02.480 good. No lie to me, please. I know that it's here. I know it 1233 01:12:02.480 --> 01:12:06.360 here. Intellectually, intellectually, I know it all. I 1234 01:12:06.360 --> 01:12:09.480 mean, I see what's to come. Like, literally, I can see 1235 01:12:09.480 --> 01:12:15.560 pictures of what's to come up. But then I just, my life hasn't 1236 01:12:15.560 --> 01:12:18.760 changed in the last seven years, really. I mean, I've changed. 1237 01:12:19.200 --> 01:12:21.640 Right, you know, and I know that there's things that are about to 1238 01:12:21.640 --> 01:12:24.400 break through. Let me let me ask you, let me ask you this, 1239 01:12:24.440 --> 01:12:27.160 Mike. All right, even challenge, maybe even challenge a little 1240 01:12:27.160 --> 01:12:32.120 bit. What I hear you saying, I'll just reflect back to you. 1241 01:12:32.120 --> 01:12:38.120 And you tell me. All right. What I hear you saying. You said 1242 01:12:38.120 --> 01:12:41.440 this, a little phrase in the midst of a lot of things you 1243 01:12:41.440 --> 01:12:48.240 said, you said, my life hasn't changed in seven years. So life 1244 01:12:48.240 --> 01:12:52.560 hasn't changed in seven years. And then you're like, but I 1245 01:12:52.560 --> 01:12:59.000 have. No, so so I'm saying like, so wait a minute. Let me don't 1246 01:12:59.000 --> 01:13:01.280 explain it. Let me just tell you, let me just reflect back 1247 01:13:01.280 --> 01:13:09.160 to what I heard. Yeah. In that phrase. Because of what you said 1248 01:13:09.160 --> 01:13:13.160 your fear was. Yeah. Here's what I heard. And that some of you 1249 01:13:13.160 --> 01:13:14.840 some of you're shaking your head because I think you might have 1250 01:13:14.840 --> 01:13:20.800 heard it too, which was, I did my part. I did everything I was 1251 01:13:20.800 --> 01:13:27.040 supposed to do. But God has not done what he's supposed to do. 1252 01:13:28.960 --> 01:13:35.400 True or false? Is that a little bit of does that hurt? When I 1253 01:13:35.400 --> 01:13:38.760 say that it's more, I think it's no answer the question. Does 1254 01:13:38.760 --> 01:13:40.200 that hurt when I say that? 1255 01:13:40.920 --> 01:13:47.160 No, it doesn't hurt when you say that. I'm just tired. I got it. 1256 01:13:47.560 --> 01:13:49.600 Because I know, I know, eventually, he's gonna come 1257 01:13:49.600 --> 01:13:53.240 through. And it's not it's not the whole give to get both that 1258 01:13:53.240 --> 01:13:56.160 BS, right? You know, I mean, because I know he's, he's not 1259 01:13:56.160 --> 01:14:00.920 obligated to give me anything. Right? It's out of true, but it 1260 01:14:00.920 --> 01:14:06.920 is, but he is obligated to perform his word. And so in his 1261 01:14:06.920 --> 01:14:13.080 timing, which is the the one of my frustrations. Yeah, but I do 1262 01:14:13.080 --> 01:14:14.280 know that, you know, like, 1263 01:14:15.000 --> 01:14:17.320 here's the thing that I want to here's the thing when I am I 1264 01:14:17.320 --> 01:14:21.120 want to amplify Mike and I and I love you. Because I love your 1265 01:14:21.120 --> 01:14:25.440 heart. I love your knowledge. I love your gift set. I love you. 1266 01:14:26.480 --> 01:14:29.960 And I just want to I just want to amplify that for for everyone 1267 01:14:29.960 --> 01:14:35.560 else. Because I mean, even even Abram said he's Mike, Mike 1268 01:14:35.560 --> 01:14:40.160 bleeds, bleeds blood, like he's real, like he's real, dude. 1269 01:14:40.360 --> 01:14:43.640 Because the perception like from Abrams perception, maybe I'm 1270 01:14:43.640 --> 01:14:46.600 just assuming this because what you said there, he looks at Mike 1271 01:14:46.600 --> 01:14:49.640 is like, Mike's this man of faith. Mike's like this positive 1272 01:14:49.640 --> 01:14:52.520 dude, Mike's a man of prayer, man of prophecy, man of all 1273 01:14:52.520 --> 01:14:55.120 this concept, all these gifts set. And so it's like, he 1274 01:14:55.120 --> 01:14:58.400 doesn't have any issues. But like, he does, because you know, 1275 01:14:58.400 --> 01:15:00.320 we know that's not true. Because Mike's been 1276 01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:05.800 Vulnerable he's shared on this call before but I I want to amplify this that you know 1277 01:15:05.800 --> 01:15:10.240 A lot of people do feel that way Mike and I don't know. I'm not saying that this is you but this is kind 1278 01:15:10.240 --> 01:15:15.600 That's why I reflected back because I wanted you to to answer that to see if that was a reflection, but a lot of people 1279 01:15:16.160 --> 01:15:17.960 do 1280 01:15:17.960 --> 01:15:19.960 They actually blame God 1281 01:15:21.440 --> 01:15:23.440 Because their life's not going right 1282 01:15:24.440 --> 01:15:31.200 They don't want to be so hurt and disappointed again and again and again that they finally come to the point where like 1283 01:15:31.200 --> 01:15:33.200 It's not me. It's God 1284 01:15:34.360 --> 01:15:39.480 It's God's time. It's God's process. It's God being God and it's God just being and 1285 01:15:40.720 --> 01:15:43.400 That is that is not true 1286 01:15:46.480 --> 01:15:50.000 Well, and you got it always has to be it always has to be 1287 01:15:51.000 --> 01:15:53.000 Because God will answer that 1288 01:15:53.520 --> 01:15:56.120 Very clearly he did with Joe for instance 1289 01:15:56.800 --> 01:16:01.160 He's like, who do you think created the stars? You do you think put your life together? Who do you think gave you breath? 1290 01:16:03.360 --> 01:16:10.720 You know, and of course we're like, oh, yeah, no, you're right. Yes Lord, but at the same time 1291 01:16:12.320 --> 01:16:16.240 There's so many things that God is like 1292 01:16:16.240 --> 01:16:20.880 Not holding back from you not holding out on you 1293 01:16:22.400 --> 01:16:24.400 to the point like 1294 01:16:24.400 --> 01:16:27.280 We have to push ourselves. We do have to like 1295 01:16:27.920 --> 01:16:33.200 Pray into we do have to like where where can I come into agreement? 1296 01:16:33.920 --> 01:16:35.200 more 1297 01:16:35.200 --> 01:16:37.200 What how can I shift? 1298 01:16:37.760 --> 01:16:43.200 Not how can I do better? How can I you know, like how can I pick myself on my bootstraps? No, not like that 1299 01:16:43.280 --> 01:16:45.280 But how can I 1300 01:16:45.280 --> 01:16:47.280 How can I see? 1301 01:16:47.600 --> 01:16:54.560 the truth differently about who God is who I am and all that because what right now what's working for isn't working for me 1302 01:16:54.880 --> 01:16:57.680 What's happening isn't working for me. I'm exhausted 1303 01:16:58.560 --> 01:17:04.960 So Mike's prayer may be more like Lord. I need grace. I need a win. I need a uplift 1304 01:17:04.960 --> 01:17:07.520 I need like him pressing into that side of things 1305 01:17:08.240 --> 01:17:10.240 not necessarily like 1306 01:17:10.320 --> 01:17:12.320 Not necessarily like 1307 01:17:13.120 --> 01:17:15.360 Um, you know like 1308 01:17:17.520 --> 01:17:22.800 The the the like force of God but just like the the 1309 01:17:23.920 --> 01:17:25.680 Take it easy 1310 01:17:25.680 --> 01:17:29.120 Grace-filled God who wants to make the path straighter 1311 01:17:29.760 --> 01:17:34.240 Because he's weary and he's tired and the bible says don't be weary and well-doing 1312 01:17:34.800 --> 01:17:39.520 And we all would agree that mike's one of the guys is doing everything. He can while doing 1313 01:17:40.720 --> 01:17:45.200 We would all go. Hey is is mike doing good spiritually? We would all whether whether he is or not 1314 01:17:45.840 --> 01:17:48.240 We our perception is to say yeah, mike's one of the most 1315 01:17:49.040 --> 01:17:53.840 Strongest faith-filled guy dudes. I know we'll pray the you know paint off the walls if he has to 1316 01:17:54.640 --> 01:17:58.260 We'll speak the we speak the voice of the lord. That's our perception 1317 01:18:01.120 --> 01:18:04.880 Right well and even in that right like um 1318 01:18:06.000 --> 01:18:08.000 You know when you're called to something huge 1319 01:18:08.560 --> 01:18:11.520 Right, there's a huge the enemy comes just equally at you 1320 01:18:12.080 --> 01:18:15.760 Right like in some you know, and I just really I just know that the road i'm the road 1321 01:18:15.840 --> 01:18:19.600 I'm towing is not something that many people go and many people give up 1322 01:18:20.320 --> 01:18:24.080 And I can and I I do prophesy, you know, you know 1323 01:18:24.560 --> 01:18:29.040 Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and everything else will be added unto you, right? 1324 01:18:29.120 --> 01:18:32.320 You know, that's that is the thing. It's like lord. I'm just going to seek your your kingdom 1325 01:18:32.880 --> 01:18:36.160 And i'm going to let you work. I'm going to worry about your kingdom. You worry about mine 1326 01:18:37.120 --> 01:18:42.800 Absolutely, you know and I know that you're a warder of those who diligently seek him but that doesn't mean that um 1327 01:18:43.920 --> 01:18:46.240 I haven't been sleeping much because that's been attacked 1328 01:18:46.860 --> 01:18:49.840 Immensely. So, um, like so when i'm just weary 1329 01:18:50.480 --> 01:18:51.360 but 1330 01:18:51.360 --> 01:18:54.560 You know, it's co-laboring like lord. How do you want me to co-labor with you? 1331 01:18:55.520 --> 01:19:00.560 How can I collaborate to get through this and you got to realize that the enemy whatever he holds up 1332 01:19:01.440 --> 01:19:02.880 Gains interest 1333 01:19:02.880 --> 01:19:08.560 And I can't wait do you guys we're gonna have a party when that when that breaks open, dude 1334 01:19:08.560 --> 01:19:10.560 I'm, just you're gonna see you're gonna see 1335 01:19:10.720 --> 01:19:13.920 you'll hear me across the globe because i'll be like 1336 01:19:14.880 --> 01:19:17.840 Finally, yes, right, but like, you know, and so 1337 01:19:18.400 --> 01:19:22.400 Um, but we like yeah, don't give up and we're growing and um 1338 01:19:23.360 --> 01:19:26.960 Getting weary and that's that's one of my prayers this week is just been lord 1339 01:19:27.680 --> 01:19:28.960 I'm tired 1340 01:19:28.960 --> 01:19:32.400 Right. I'm tapped out. I don't want to be tapped out, right? 1341 01:19:33.120 --> 01:19:38.240 Um, and I just I just need an infusion and a win would be great a win would be amazing 1342 01:19:38.880 --> 01:19:43.600 Yeah, I agree. I'm gonna i'm gonna agree with that. Let's just let's just partner with that as we close out father god 1343 01:19:45.120 --> 01:19:50.000 I agree right now with every guy on this call every man on this call for a win 1344 01:19:50.720 --> 01:19:52.720 We need some wins lord 1345 01:19:52.800 --> 01:19:55.920 We really do we need some wins in this group some major 1346 01:19:56.560 --> 01:19:59.920 Major breakthrough wins and so father god, we just pray right 1347 01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:04.940 Now, Lord, for the wins, we pray right now, Lord, 1348 01:20:04.940 --> 01:20:06.900 for grace and mercy. 1349 01:20:06.900 --> 01:20:09.580 We pray now, Lord, for every man, 1350 01:20:09.580 --> 01:20:11.740 whatever they're focused in, whatever their issue, 1351 01:20:11.740 --> 01:20:13.180 whatever their obstacle is, 1352 01:20:13.180 --> 01:20:16.060 whatever the hurdle that's in their way right now 1353 01:20:16.060 --> 01:20:18.940 that they feel like they have to jump over, 1354 01:20:18.940 --> 01:20:23.180 Lord, let them be able to do it with ease and with grace 1355 01:20:23.180 --> 01:20:26.100 and with like a fluidity and just such a, 1356 01:20:26.100 --> 01:20:28.500 just not a problem. 1357 01:20:28.560 --> 01:20:32.260 Lord, so they can run the race they've been given. 1358 01:20:32.260 --> 01:20:35.180 And Father God, let there be wins. 1359 01:20:35.180 --> 01:20:36.580 I just pray and agree. 1360 01:20:36.580 --> 01:20:39.580 I add my faith to each man on this call 1361 01:20:39.580 --> 01:20:41.940 for wins, for breakthroughs, 1362 01:20:41.940 --> 01:20:44.460 significant wins and breakthroughs, 1363 01:20:44.460 --> 01:20:49.100 new jobs, new relationships, new meetings, 1364 01:20:49.100 --> 01:20:51.340 new breakthroughs in health, 1365 01:20:51.340 --> 01:20:55.260 new paradigm shifts, new ideas. 1366 01:20:55.260 --> 01:20:57.260 Somebody mentioned on here, a business, 1367 01:20:57.780 --> 01:20:59.020 they wanna start a business so bad 1368 01:20:59.020 --> 01:21:00.340 but they don't know what the idea is. 1369 01:21:00.340 --> 01:21:02.100 I pray for business ideas. 1370 01:21:02.100 --> 01:21:03.820 I pray for innovations. 1371 01:21:03.820 --> 01:21:06.100 I pray for there to be inventions, 1372 01:21:06.100 --> 01:21:10.780 that there to be just new paths, new streams of income. 1373 01:21:10.780 --> 01:21:14.620 I pray if it has to be a raven or a check in the mail 1374 01:21:14.620 --> 01:21:16.760 or a raven to bring bread like in the Old Testament, 1375 01:21:16.760 --> 01:21:18.640 that there would be checks in the mail 1376 01:21:18.640 --> 01:21:20.660 to even give it a jumpstart. 1377 01:21:20.660 --> 01:21:22.060 Like I know I had that in my life. 1378 01:21:22.060 --> 01:21:24.100 There was a one point in my life where I needed something 1379 01:21:24.140 --> 01:21:27.340 and I got a jumpstart because there was an infusion of cash 1380 01:21:27.340 --> 01:21:29.260 or there's an infusion of help 1381 01:21:29.260 --> 01:21:32.180 or an infusion of assistance or whatever it is. 1382 01:21:32.180 --> 01:21:36.660 I pray right now and I agree with every man on this call. 1383 01:21:36.660 --> 01:21:37.660 And they wouldn't be here 1384 01:21:37.660 --> 01:21:38.900 if they weren't believing for something. 1385 01:21:38.900 --> 01:21:39.740 They wouldn't be here 1386 01:21:39.740 --> 01:21:42.380 if they weren't extending their faith 1387 01:21:42.380 --> 01:21:44.560 for whatever they're believing breakthrough in. 1388 01:21:44.560 --> 01:21:47.700 So I just pray for them and I agree right now 1389 01:21:47.700 --> 01:21:52.700 for massive breakthrough in Jesus name, amen and amen. 1390 01:21:54.540 --> 01:21:55.380 Amen. 1391 01:21:55.380 --> 01:21:58.220 Lord, may you bring peace and connection 1392 01:21:58.220 --> 01:21:59.740 back to the dormant household. 1393 01:21:59.740 --> 01:22:00.580 Amen. 1394 01:22:02.140 --> 01:22:04.420 And actually that would be maybe even closer 1395 01:22:04.420 --> 01:22:05.940 than they were before, amen. 1396 01:22:06.900 --> 01:22:07.740 Hallelujah. 1397 01:22:08.780 --> 01:22:10.100 Guys, I love you. 1398 01:22:10.100 --> 01:22:11.180 God bless you. 1399 01:22:11.180 --> 01:22:12.860 Have a great week. 1400 01:22:12.860 --> 01:22:14.660 I'm gonna let you go because if you didn't notice, 1401 01:22:14.660 --> 01:22:16.260 that was my wife calling a few minutes ago 1402 01:22:16.260 --> 01:22:17.260 and she's like, what are you doing? 1403 01:22:17.260 --> 01:22:18.660 Where are you at? 1404 01:22:18.660 --> 01:22:19.980 I see you, I love you. 1405 01:22:19.980 --> 01:22:20.940 God bless. 1406 01:22:20.940 --> 01:22:21.780 God bless you.