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Hey Jess, how you doing? Hey Tom it's good I couldn't get my audio to connect

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is Ray was supposed to let me borrow his office. But guess

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what?

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Oh, congratulations on all your recent closings.

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Oh, thank you so much. Yeah, it's. It's an interesting

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market we're in right now.

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Yes.

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Hey, Leslie, how are you?

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Yeah.

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It was like post election, everyone had certainty, so they

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just started making offers like crazy. And then it's kind of

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been at a standstill. Because we have so much inventory here.

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It's it's crazy.

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But

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yeah, and then I noticed the rates went down. So that was

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great.

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Yeah, that'll definitely help. For sure. For sure. For sure.

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I like your hat, Leslie.

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Very nice. Very nice.

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So maybe we'll give it like one more minute.

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Yeah, I'm never the first one here. What's going on?

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Everyone's taken a day.

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Yeah.

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Well, I have to send my driveway and my sander took a day so I'm

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not happy.

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Oh, no.

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Yeah.

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Just a little over here to fix it.

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Guess what? We're past the 11th. And you're still here. So I

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guess everything's going well.

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Yeah, right. Nothing. It's been nothing since.

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Can we joke about that now? Is it too?

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I hope so. Okay, good.

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I'd like to say I made everything out of nothing. That

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would be great.

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Well, our prayers are working then. And that's, yeah, that's

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it matters.

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That's the whole thing.

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Hey, Lisa.

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Good day. How are you lovely lady?

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I'm great. I just love that. canvas behind you. What is that?

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Is that a blanket?

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It's it's, it's, it's a scarf I purchased in Cancun.

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That's so cool.

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One of the street vendors had it. I'm like, Oh, I gotta have

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it. And it works. Perfect. Thank you.

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That is so awesome.

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So today, you know, I was just really prompted to put it back

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on. Put this session back on, on you all that are attending.

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And have you walk through just to start some break some things

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that have shifted results wise in your life. And some things

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that are still a work in progress. So, Lisa, since you're

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big on my screen, maybe I'll start with you and very

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colorful, and very patriotic. I love it.

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Where do you see God showing up in your life? In a big way?

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Where have you seen a major shift? And where do you feel

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like he hasn't answered you yet?

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He's shown up in a big way while one Well, I won't go back 12

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months, I'm going to focus on right now.

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Over the last couple of weeks, I have. And I'll be honest,

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Jessica, it was when you it was, I think it was the last

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time we we got together, it started. Because you were so

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authentic and honest. And I just needed that slap in the head and

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go at least and it wasn't a slap in the head. It wasn't bad. It

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was a good slap.

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As to where I really am. And I've been a believer. For gosh,

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it's been 20 years. And yes, it's a roller coaster. And when

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we drop the ball, and forget that he's in charge, and that we

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can do all things through him with him, because he has given

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us the Holy Spirit in us. We've got that strength. So the Oh,

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woe is me pity party doesn't need to be. And just knowing

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that I knew it, but just having I guess having you be

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accountable, me be accountable and you speaking life into me

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is what you did. It was it was tough love. It hurt at first,

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but I'm so thankful for it.

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And by that happening, that experience, I have taken charge of my life and I'm doing

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lots of different things.

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I'm connecting with the Chamber of Commerce here.

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I was going to ask you, since our last meeting, how that's going with you getting out into

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the community and how you're feeling, where you see God placing people in your life strategically.

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Yes.

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When I started a new business and in addition, I'm focusing on a second business, I've got

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to focus on one or two things max.

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I was trying to do too many things at once and that's not humanly possible.

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And by putting a stake in the ground saying, okay, this is what I'm going to do.

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I'm still searching for help to start an LLC.

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I've gone to the Florida website, reached out to SCORE.

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They're not real quick.

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Did you reach out to Ray?

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No, I didn't.

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I probably ought to, huh?

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Yeah, you definitely should.

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Okay.

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So I'm like, oh, he's got, we get this mindset, he's got enough on his plate.

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No, he says he's there for us for a reason.

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Do it.

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So thank you for that.

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God told me to do it.

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And I'm like, oh, not now.

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So yes, I will reach out to him and I'm excited about it.

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So yeah, I've gone to storage facilities for my decluttering business and actually woke

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up three nights ago and God said, you need to spell your business like this because it's

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clutter free, made easy, Ray helped me with that and clutter free was already taken while

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God woke me up three days ago and said, put it with a K.

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Your last name starts with a K and so does the kingdom, start it with a K.

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I go to find the website, it's available.

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Boom.

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Love it.

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Oh my gosh, I love it.

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So it's clutter free with a K.

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And so that's good.

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Things that I'm working on are.

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Well, first, before we go there, let's just acknowledge you for following through with

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the instructions.

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I acknowledge you for that because being uncomfortable in your own skin, going to the chamber of

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commerce, really feeling settled in a place and feeling like a place that you can call

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at home.

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I know it was very uncomfortable.

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And so I acknowledge you for making those first steps.

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And with that, obviously some different things are showing up in your life and I just want

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to make sure you're acknowledging how incredible that is and where God is showing up to give

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you the name to now you have a, I hear the focus and clarity in your vision now that

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I didn't hear before.

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And so, and Ray does this for so many people as well.

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And that when we, when we free up one area of our life where we kind of close the door

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on one area of our life and know that we're on the right path, there are other ones open

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up, but we can't get to that other open door until that is closed or that is, or we've

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gone through the learning lesson that he wants us to go through.

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So I'm so excited for you.

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I hear the clarity.

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I know that this is your year for this.

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And also you love it, which is so awesome.

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Okay.

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So now let's shift into where you're working on things.

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I'm working at, and there's, there's a couple of things that I'm working on and ironically

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one is simplifying my life here because I'm, my dream is to live in an RV for short term.

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I love that.

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Scared to do it.

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I mean, I'm, I'm like freaking out going, no, it's not now.

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And I'm guys like, you said you wanted it.

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Let's do this.

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So I'm going through everything in this house that I've brought with me from Texas.

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And I think I'm going to close to sell, sell everything I own just because, I mean, I I'll

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need it till the end of November when my lease is up.

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But my goal is at the end of November to get in a, like they call it a class, be like

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a van style.

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That way I can drive anywhere.

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And so what is holding you, what, what is the conflict there or is it just an internal

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conflict that you're working through?

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That's an internal conflict because I've got some, Hmm, I'm going to get emotional.

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It's okay.

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I have some antiques that are my great grandmothers and, and it's that emotional attachment that

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if I get rid of them, I get rid of her.

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But I know that's not true.

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I know that's not true.

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And I've got to get past that, that grief of losing something that was, I mean, it smelled

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like her house still and I've had it for 20 years and it's just it reminds me of going to seeing her.

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Are these furniture pieces Lisa? Yes one's a secretary desk that's it's just ornate with

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mirrors and hand carved wood it's beautiful and I've got two um mission rocking chairs

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that are solid oak and I love wood so it's it's part of me's like I don't and like I could put

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them in storage I guess or maybe I don't want to put them in storage though well there's that

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there's a few ways to look at this um obviously logically we know what you know that that has

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nothing to do with where she is and you know that she would want you to follow your your dream of

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of doing this and obviously God is calling you to do that maybe to move around and meet people

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yes so a suggestion and something that that came to mind is what about taking a piece of the

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furniture maybe you know just carving a piece or having a handle of a drawer or something

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taking a piece of the furniture and keeping that close to you just for a subconscious and and um

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um just an emotional memory yeah and you say that and as you were speaking that it was

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I have a photo of my great-grandmother standing in front of her house and you can see the two

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rocking chairs on her porch beautiful so I don't really need a physical anything I've got the

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picture I can scan it and make it digital yeah technology today I want to point out something

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that um that we just this kind of exercise that we just went through because it's I think it's

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very valuable for everyone including myself on this call um you know I talk a lot about this in

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in our speeches at different events and things but giving giving yourself permission

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is one of the hardest things that we can do and so even sometimes God tells us it's up to you

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you know this is where I have free will for you it's up to you it's your choice either way is

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going to be okay sometimes we have that green light and it's so hard for us to give ourselves

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permission we look for permission from outside of ourselves in other people um you know from

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from other circumstances and so I just want to point out that you didn't need my suggestion

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to give yourself that permission you already had an idea of this photo and I'm sure you've

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thought about it before but the fact that I was on this call and and said it to you just

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reinforced okay I can move forward with this now and so it's really a call to arms to all

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of us to remember that we don't have to do that yeah thank you and and myself included I'm preaching

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to myself um we can step into this this space whenever we choose to when we feel it's right

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so thank you for that thank you for opening up that discussion um and thank you for helping me

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recognize that I don't need permission that's huge that is huge and it helps me keep and build

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upon the confidence I used to have I know I have it it's in me and let's take charge and just rock

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and roll rock and roll rock and roll rock and roll let's do this

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doesn't that feel good it's that frequency you the energy within us when we do when we when we

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get to that point that state of mind and it's it's all about energy at the root and it's yeah

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jump up and down dance whatever I'm excited thank you and yeah I don't need permission

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but I love you anyways well I love you too yes absolutely we can we can move forward with things

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and sometimes like I've mentioned before God slams the door in our face but at least at least

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we went for it you know we went for it and we found out oh that's not the right the right way

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or it is either way we don't we don't need to seek permission outside of him and um outside

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of ourselves so I appreciate you thank you Angela I don't know if you're on if you're

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available to talk or not but I just got nudged to ask you the same question of where

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have you seen God showing up in your life and

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Where do you feel like there's still things you need to work on?

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Thomas, I don't know how to make her bigger.

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Poor Lisa is just right there with her big line.

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Hey, hey everyone.

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Wow, it's been, I can't believe all the things that have happened just in the short period of time of the year.

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Just been really leaning in to listen to God like never before.

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And just, it's been exciting.

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So I've been in network marketing for 18 years at the top of one company.

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And the last couple of years I've taken a hit and not at the top.

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And just couldn't really get excited about it.

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And I just, you know, so along came on January 11th, pretty much this other opportunity with a totally different category of product that doesn't compete with, you know, what I'm doing with the other one.

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And I actually was invited to a small room with nine other scientists.

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And I begrudgingly went, invited by basically a pastor that I let stay at my Airbnb.

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So my Airbnb, I host pastors.

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And anyway, I went there and these products so blew my mind.

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I asked him if he would come and to church with me the next day because I knew my pastor needed to hear about them.

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And well, so I actually asked him if he was a man of God.

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I said, are you a man of faith?

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And he said, he said, kind of.

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And I said, well, would you go to church with me?

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Because my pastor needs to hear about these products.

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Anyway, he said, yes.

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I said, full disclosure.

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My church is four hours long.

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He went and he received.

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So this owner of the school.

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So you met through someone staying at your Airbnb, a pastor staying at your Airbnb.

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Yeah.

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So I always wanted to be the shoot of my woman.

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I don't know if you guys know what that means.

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But the shoot of my woman would has, you know, always had a room to house Elijah.

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And so and just just so I've hosted in house evangelists from all over the world in my home.

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And many, many times I've kicked people.

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I kick my kids out of the room and different things.

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And I just really wanted to have a heart to really give people in past and, you know, the ministry a respite and just appreciation from buying them new pajamas to just, you know, wanting to try to make them feel special.

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And so through this salon and spa that we purchased, I have this amazing Airbnb that we created called the blessing.

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And so now I can do it outside of my home.

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And so they were staying free there and they introduced us to a product that honestly I was kind of ticked off that they were telling me about another product because I have been in network marketing for 18 years and I don't want another product.

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If you get when putting down.

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Right. And when you get invited to those things, you know, you know what that.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Wine and dine you for no reason.

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Yeah.

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So basically this product is even helping people who are vaccine injured, which is a whole nother thing.

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So I knew my pastor had to hear about it.

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And so the chance of me actually getting this scientist to meet my pastor was zero to nil, if you know what I mean, on a Sunday.

257
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But I just felt the Holy Spirit say, ask him to church.

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So he said he would go to me with me to church.

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I said, full disclosure, my church is four hours.

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He said, that's fine.

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He answered the altar call.

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You guys.

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This guy of this global company answer the altar call.

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Okay, this is a very confidential information.

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And after church, I just felt like the Holy Spirit said, go, like, go talk to your pastor.

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And usually he disappears immediately.

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I mean, he's it's a it's a big church, you know, and.

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He spent eight hours with us.

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He's like, this is exactly what this is exactly the enzyme I've been looking for.

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And it's good for gardens.

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So he sent us out to his garden.

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He has a big garden that God told him to do.

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And anyway, long story short is since January 11, I have 40 people on my team.

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I have I'm planning a team meeting on the 15th of March with a totally different company.

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I totally kept it separate from my other network marketing company because, one, I'm not going

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after any of the people that are already on my team, and I'm so excited about this new

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product and I just couldn't get excited about my old company.

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So that's been amazing.

279
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I can't even tell you.

280
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It's just like I can't even believe I'm sitting right here where I'm at right now just because

281
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I could have told you, if somebody would have told me that this would have been the case,

282
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I would have told you that you're crazy.

283
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So that's been exciting and I'm excited about what the product is doing and just I have

284
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a new burst of energy of life around all that.

285
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Seems to be a common theme in here.

286
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Yeah.

287
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Can I just acknowledge too that you were, what if you weren't obedient and didn't go

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talk to the pastor on that Sunday?

289
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Oh, I just, I can't even imagine.

290
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You know, our pastor, he just, to spend eight hours with this man was a gift just in itself,

291
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you know, but I just, I honestly, I look back at it and I just think I can't believe that

292
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that happened.

293
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And so, yeah, so it's been super exciting that.

294
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And then we've got other really exciting things happening with, I don't know if you remember,

295
00:26:29.760 --> 00:26:34.800
I was seeking God for wisdom on what to do with the cleaning company in DC and God told

296
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me to do this contracting officer.

297
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So we're just putting the final numbers in on that bid and, you know, just continuing

298
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to pray.

299
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You know, God opened the door.

300
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I believe we're going to walk through it because that's just, that doesn't, that does not happen

301
00:26:50.620 --> 00:26:56.460
you guys for, you know, a contracting officer just to set aside something, a multimillion

302
00:26:56.460 --> 00:27:03.580
dollar deal for cleaning the, the army base in Fort Belvoir, Virginia.

303
00:27:03.580 --> 00:27:11.220
So and then we've got some other real estate things that are really exciting and also really

304
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crazy going on.

305
00:27:12.580 --> 00:27:17.820
I had a fight with one of my contractors, two of my contractors were fighting the other

306
00:27:17.820 --> 00:27:24.500
day and I felt the Holy Spirit just said, get in the middle, get in the middle of these

307
00:27:24.500 --> 00:27:27.500
two guys are about ready to like throw punches.

308
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And I just said, stop in Jesus name.

309
00:27:32.980 --> 00:27:39.500
And one, they never heard me speak loud and two, they just, they all, these three huge

310
00:27:39.500 --> 00:27:44.180
men just stopped and looked at me with these big eyes.

311
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And I just told one, I said, Eric, you go home.

312
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You know, these two guys, you finish the work.

313
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And I just said, I shared the gospel with them and it was wonderful.

314
00:27:57.140 --> 00:28:00.140
And they all thanked me for praying over them.

315
00:28:00.140 --> 00:28:04.300
And it's been a tiring couple of days, but God's been moving.

316
00:28:04.300 --> 00:28:10.380
And so yeah, just asking God for continued wisdom.

317
00:28:11.100 --> 00:28:23.260
And with that, my son was selected in Bible college to go with nine other men to Daytona

318
00:28:23.260 --> 00:28:24.260
right now.

319
00:28:24.260 --> 00:28:31.860
And they are with the Jerry Savelle Ministries to, you know, preach the gospel to all these,

320
00:28:31.860 --> 00:28:36.940
you know, motorcycle people, Harley-Davidson, it's a Harley-Davidson conference.

321
00:28:36.940 --> 00:28:44.900
So pray for my son, Joe, he's, you know, he's 19 and he's an old spirit, but you know,

322
00:28:44.900 --> 00:28:52.900
he put on dad's Harley hat and jacket, and it felt like he was David going to fight Goliath.

323
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And he said to me, he goes, mom, do I look like a Harley man?

324
00:28:56.740 --> 00:29:05.660
And he actually looked like a boy just in two big clothes, you know.

325
00:29:05.660 --> 00:29:08.740
And I said, you look like a Harley man.

326
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And anyway, he called me last night and he said, mom, I've never been so, I guess so

327
00:29:17.300 --> 00:29:22.260
disrespected, you know, because he's sharing gospel, obviously, and like he's never been

328
00:29:22.260 --> 00:29:25.540
so attacked in his life.

329
00:29:25.540 --> 00:29:28.340
And so I just am praying for him.

330
00:29:28.340 --> 00:29:32.740
So that's what I got to share.

331
00:29:32.740 --> 00:29:37.500
So God's moving and, you know, my husband's moving way too fast because he wants to buy

332
00:29:37.500 --> 00:29:41.660
a restaurant and we still have this medical building we're looking at purchasing.

333
00:29:41.660 --> 00:29:45.820
And I'm like, okay, God, I know you want us to fund the end time harvest, and I just want

334
00:29:45.820 --> 00:29:46.820
to be obedient.

335
00:29:46.820 --> 00:29:50.980
I want to be pliable in your hands, and I know we can do all things through Christ who

336
00:29:50.980 --> 00:29:51.980
strengthens us.

337
00:29:51.980 --> 00:29:57.380
So strengthen me, Lord, and, you know, amen.

338
00:29:57.380 --> 00:29:58.380
So.

339
00:29:58.380 --> 00:29:59.380
Absolutely.

340
00:29:59.380 --> 00:29:59.380


341
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:06.400
Well, we'll definitely pray for Joe and wow, is that going to accelerate him in his life?

342
00:30:06.400 --> 00:30:07.400
He's 19.

343
00:30:07.400 --> 00:30:08.400
Yeah.

344
00:30:08.400 --> 00:30:09.400
Yeah.

345
00:30:09.400 --> 00:30:10.400
He's a cool kid.

346
00:30:10.400 --> 00:30:13.800
He's going to run through brick walls.

347
00:30:13.800 --> 00:30:22.240
So, but you know that this is just ultimately, yeah, that's putting him through to really

348
00:30:22.240 --> 00:30:24.620
just sharpen him to have a warrior spirit.

349
00:30:24.620 --> 00:30:31.740
And that was something that I got by, I don't know if Ray, I'm sure Ray has shared the Brilliant

350
00:30:31.740 --> 00:30:38.700
app with you all with Graham Cook, but it's Brilliant Plus app.

351
00:30:38.700 --> 00:30:41.040
It's gotten me through some really hard times.

352
00:30:41.040 --> 00:30:43.420
It is absolutely incredible.

353
00:30:43.420 --> 00:30:50.140
And they do crafted prayers on there where he crafts a prayer, helps you to craft a prayer

354
00:30:50.140 --> 00:30:56.940
around a, an area of your life that is, you know, that is circumstantially struggling.

355
00:30:56.940 --> 00:31:04.860
And I did one around my children because I just felt like my daughter was just lacking

356
00:31:04.860 --> 00:31:05.860
joy.

357
00:31:05.860 --> 00:31:11.180
Like there was something attacking her or something, just, she was just lacking joy and the word

358
00:31:11.180 --> 00:31:12.460
that kept coming up.

359
00:31:12.460 --> 00:31:17.500
And I feel like it's the same word for your son is warrior, warrior spirit and praying

360
00:31:17.500 --> 00:31:23.420
through that and for that warrior spirit and, you know, death and life are in the power

361
00:31:23.420 --> 00:31:28.260
of the tongue that just kept coming to me and praying over their tongue, praying over

362
00:31:28.260 --> 00:31:31.660
their speech, praying over their proclamation.

363
00:31:31.660 --> 00:31:35.540
And in doing that, it literally changes everything.

364
00:31:35.540 --> 00:31:39.420
And I, I don't want to get political on here.

365
00:31:39.420 --> 00:31:40.420
Okay.

366
00:31:40.420 --> 00:31:46.340
I just want to share something that was a very, very important lesson from what you

367
00:31:46.340 --> 00:31:47.340
just said.

368
00:31:47.340 --> 00:31:55.620
And it brought it up to me, you know, watching the, um, state of the union last night and

369
00:31:55.620 --> 00:31:59.180
just listening to the way that Trump speaks.

370
00:31:59.180 --> 00:32:00.180
Okay.

371
00:32:00.180 --> 00:32:01.180
Which some people can't stand.

372
00:32:01.180 --> 00:32:03.980
I get that.

373
00:32:03.980 --> 00:32:08.460
But one of the things that we've been going through Ray and I with Graham cook is the

374
00:32:08.460 --> 00:32:13.300
power of proclamation and saying it out loud.

375
00:32:13.300 --> 00:32:18.900
And it hit me like a ton of bricks when I heard that state of the union last night,

376
00:32:18.900 --> 00:32:27.180
because to, to people who don't understand this, he's, he can sound very arrogant.

377
00:32:27.180 --> 00:32:29.340
I mean, we can all agree on that.

378
00:32:29.340 --> 00:32:37.300
He can sound arrogant and he can sound like, you know, nutty sometimes, but man, is there

379
00:32:37.300 --> 00:32:45.980
no one who proclaims what he wants and how amazing it is and going to be then Trump,

380
00:32:45.980 --> 00:32:52.260
his power of proclamation is incredible.

381
00:32:52.260 --> 00:32:57.940
And we can all learn from that power of proclamation in your life, whether you agree with him or

382
00:32:57.940 --> 00:33:05.660
not that proclamation he follows through on in a lot of ways.

383
00:33:05.660 --> 00:33:14.420
And he's got to be one of the most proclaiming humans on the planet that I've ever heard.

384
00:33:14.420 --> 00:33:16.260
And look at what he's accomplished.

385
00:33:16.260 --> 00:33:17.660
I mean, love him or hate him.

386
00:33:17.660 --> 00:33:22.540
He's the president of the United States proclamation.

387
00:33:22.540 --> 00:33:28.820
And I don't think anybody on here hates him, but I'm just, you know, it's, it's so powerful.

388
00:33:28.820 --> 00:33:33.980
So you, you just speak, you speak that life over everything that you want and look at

389
00:33:33.980 --> 00:33:37.540
what's happening in your life to who much is given, much is required.

390
00:33:37.540 --> 00:33:40.260
And because of your obedience and what you're following through on.

391
00:33:40.260 --> 00:33:47.020
And so I'll ask all of you where in the past, have you not been obedient?

392
00:33:47.020 --> 00:33:51.460
Because sometimes we can sit in our current circumstance and where we are and think, how

393
00:33:51.460 --> 00:33:53.740
in the world did we get here?

394
00:33:53.740 --> 00:34:00.700
But it, but through prayer and asking those questions, we can see exactly how we got here.

395
00:34:00.700 --> 00:34:05.700
And it's always through non-obedience whether, and we may not have recognized it at the time.

396
00:34:05.700 --> 00:34:10.219
It's not to point blame or guilt, and God doesn't want that for us at all.

397
00:34:10.219 --> 00:34:15.900
It's to show us, okay, moving forward, if you follow my path and you follow the obedience

398
00:34:15.900 --> 00:34:20.179
and where I've called you and you make these different decisions, your life will be accelerated

399
00:34:20.179 --> 00:34:21.980
and will look very, very different.

400
00:34:21.980 --> 00:34:27.500
And so I commend your obedience and it's inspiring and everything that you're doing, you can

401
00:34:27.500 --> 00:34:35.380
feel it in your energy and how you show up and just, you know, that nothing is too powerful

402
00:34:35.380 --> 00:34:41.340
for Christ and just speaking over that and speaking into that, that power of proclamation

403
00:34:41.340 --> 00:34:47.980
is real and it's important and it's important for our kids too.

404
00:34:47.980 --> 00:34:57.200
And I mentioned one thing, so myself and another gal in my community, we started a Bible study

405
00:34:57.200 --> 00:34:59.440
that meets every Tuesday.

406
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:03.080
and there's about 50 women, people are so hungry.

407
00:35:04.200 --> 00:35:06.640
But we were talking about Zachariah

408
00:35:06.640 --> 00:35:09.640
and how the angel came and said that,

409
00:35:09.640 --> 00:35:12.640
Elizabeth was gonna have a child

410
00:35:12.640 --> 00:35:15.620
and he was speaking doubt.

411
00:35:15.620 --> 00:35:19.440
And so, the interesting thing is,

412
00:35:19.440 --> 00:35:22.420
is that God muted Zachariah,

413
00:35:22.420 --> 00:35:24.340
not to really punish him,

414
00:35:24.340 --> 00:35:28.720
but really so he wouldn't speak against the plan of God.

415
00:35:28.760 --> 00:35:33.420
So think about God, our words are so important

416
00:35:33.420 --> 00:35:37.880
that God had to mute someone he was gonna use

417
00:35:37.880 --> 00:35:42.760
so he wouldn't speak against where God wanted him to go.

418
00:35:42.760 --> 00:35:44.840
And there's a scripture that says,

419
00:35:44.840 --> 00:35:47.920
"'God, stand guard over the door of my mouth.'"

420
00:35:47.920 --> 00:35:52.140
And that's a constant proclamation for me

421
00:35:52.140 --> 00:35:56.360
because I think some of the most powerful places we can be

422
00:35:56.360 --> 00:35:57.920
is sometimes in our silence.

423
00:35:57.920 --> 00:35:59.520
If we can't speak anything,

424
00:36:01.000 --> 00:36:03.580
that's going to propel where we wanna go.

425
00:36:04.640 --> 00:36:06.480
So, amen.

426
00:36:06.480 --> 00:36:07.600
Absolutely.

427
00:36:07.600 --> 00:36:11.120
And what power in that lesson, right?

428
00:36:11.120 --> 00:36:15.000
In that oftentimes, not sometimes,

429
00:36:15.000 --> 00:36:19.080
oftentimes when you proclaim with your mouth,

430
00:36:19.080 --> 00:36:22.320
what's the first thought or the first feeling that comes up

431
00:36:22.320 --> 00:36:24.940
when we proclaim something big with our mouth?

432
00:36:25.780 --> 00:36:27.340
I don't wanna disappoint.

433
00:36:28.220 --> 00:36:29.900
I don't wanna, I don't wanna,

434
00:36:29.900 --> 00:36:32.060
I don't know if I can do that.

435
00:36:32.060 --> 00:36:34.620
So following through with the thought

436
00:36:34.620 --> 00:36:38.900
and the feeling behind that proclamation is also huge

437
00:36:38.900 --> 00:36:43.900
and not caring what other people think about it,

438
00:36:44.840 --> 00:36:47.200
not caring how we sound,

439
00:36:47.200 --> 00:36:49.540
that we're proclaiming big things,

440
00:36:49.540 --> 00:36:54.540
that we're making big promises to ourselves and to others.

441
00:36:55.940 --> 00:36:58.500
Not caring about how other people think about that

442
00:36:58.500 --> 00:37:00.260
because the only one who matters is,

443
00:37:00.260 --> 00:37:03.180
the only judgment that matters is God's judgment.

444
00:37:03.180 --> 00:37:06.060
And I just, I love that.

445
00:37:06.060 --> 00:37:06.940
And I love that prayer.

446
00:37:06.940 --> 00:37:09.660
God, stand guard over the power of my mouth.

447
00:37:11.460 --> 00:37:12.300
Over the door of my,

448
00:37:12.300 --> 00:37:14.980
I think it's the door of my lips or whatever.

449
00:37:14.980 --> 00:37:16.860
But yeah, like stand there.

450
00:37:18.500 --> 00:37:20.720
And I know we talked about crafted prayer,

451
00:37:20.760 --> 00:37:25.760
but oh, for years I've had Jermaine Copeland's book

452
00:37:26.240 --> 00:37:31.240
called The Power of, no, Prayers That Avail Much.

453
00:37:31.240 --> 00:37:34.320
Oh, I think everybody should get that book.

454
00:37:34.320 --> 00:37:36.600
So it's, she's not related to the other Copelands.

455
00:37:36.600 --> 00:37:38.680
I know sometimes the Copelands can be,

456
00:37:38.680 --> 00:37:41.760
but her name's Jermaine Copeland.

457
00:37:41.760 --> 00:37:45.080
If you look on, you know, Amazon,

458
00:37:45.080 --> 00:37:48.320
it's called The Prayers That Avail Much.

459
00:37:48.400 --> 00:37:51.640
And basically it's maybe 200 crafted prayers

460
00:37:51.640 --> 00:37:56.640
over fear, financing, mental health, trouble with marriage.

461
00:37:57.360 --> 00:37:59.480
And then it just is a prayer.

462
00:37:59.480 --> 00:38:01.320
And then it tells you exactly

463
00:38:01.320 --> 00:38:03.160
where the scriptures come from.

464
00:38:03.160 --> 00:38:05.980
And so I've used that book for years.

465
00:38:05.980 --> 00:38:09.320
And I really feel like that book has been instrumental

466
00:38:09.320 --> 00:38:11.560
in even teaching me how to pray.

467
00:38:11.560 --> 00:38:13.480
Cause people are like, how do you know how to pray?

468
00:38:13.480 --> 00:38:15.400
And I'm like, well, I didn't know how to pray.

469
00:38:15.400 --> 00:38:17.000
I would just look up the topic

470
00:38:17.000 --> 00:38:20.080
I was having a challenge with and just, you know,

471
00:38:20.080 --> 00:38:22.440
God says we need to send it out

472
00:38:22.440 --> 00:38:24.680
because our words will not come back void,

473
00:38:24.680 --> 00:38:26.040
but they'll go out and accomplish

474
00:38:26.040 --> 00:38:30.560
all that they're meant to do, but only if we send them out.

475
00:38:30.560 --> 00:38:35.080
And so that is kind of a cheat sheet or cheat book

476
00:38:35.080 --> 00:38:40.080
for sending out prayers for children, marriage, addiction.

477
00:38:40.280 --> 00:38:42.920
So, yeah.

478
00:38:42.920 --> 00:38:44.120
I wrote that down.

479
00:38:44.120 --> 00:38:44.960
Awesome.

480
00:38:47.520 --> 00:38:50.520
And I need a constant reminder of how important that is.

481
00:38:52.040 --> 00:38:54.400
And I'll just say it, especially women, right?

482
00:38:54.400 --> 00:38:57.600
Because men are very straightforward to the point

483
00:38:57.600 --> 00:38:59.240
when women get together,

484
00:38:59.240 --> 00:39:01.320
it's very easy to go down the rabbit hole

485
00:39:01.320 --> 00:39:04.720
of proclaiming the wrong things with your mouth.

486
00:39:04.720 --> 00:39:09.040
So it's really important to guard that.

487
00:39:09.040 --> 00:39:10.760
Absolutely.

488
00:39:10.760 --> 00:39:15.760
And speak life over it, over your life.

489
00:39:15.880 --> 00:39:17.000
Thank you so much, Angela.

490
00:39:17.000 --> 00:39:18.840
That was great.

491
00:39:18.840 --> 00:39:19.680
My joy.

492
00:39:19.680 --> 00:39:22.080
And this is what the book looks like.

493
00:39:22.080 --> 00:39:22.920
Prayer Set Available.

494
00:39:22.920 --> 00:39:23.760
It's beautiful.

495
00:39:23.760 --> 00:39:24.880
It's a beautiful book.

496
00:39:24.880 --> 00:39:28.280
Yeah, it's leather bound copy on Amazon, 20 bucks,

497
00:39:28.280 --> 00:39:30.120
something like that.

498
00:39:30.120 --> 00:39:32.760
They have different versions I just found out, Angela.

499
00:39:32.760 --> 00:39:33.840
So I'm going to look into that.

500
00:39:33.840 --> 00:39:34.680
Thank you.

501
00:39:34.680 --> 00:39:35.840
Yeah, they're great.

502
00:39:36.600 --> 00:39:38.720
Leslie, are you still there?

503
00:39:40.720 --> 00:39:41.560
She's hiding.

504
00:39:44.200 --> 00:39:45.480
Yeah, I am hiding, but.

505
00:39:45.480 --> 00:39:46.320
Why?

506
00:39:46.320 --> 00:39:47.960
You look so great in your hat.

507
00:39:47.960 --> 00:39:52.960
Well, because it doesn't fix everything.

508
00:39:53.160 --> 00:39:54.880
Oh my gosh, you're beautiful.

509
00:39:54.880 --> 00:39:56.400
You're absolutely beautiful.

510
00:39:56.400 --> 00:39:57.240
I mean it, here.

511
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:03.960
I, I, um, I'm definitely on the struggle bus.

512
00:40:04.200 --> 00:40:10.160
I just had, uh, a healing retreat in Mexico that was great, but I feel like

513
00:40:10.160 --> 00:40:11.920
I had a hard landing when I came home.

514
00:40:11.960 --> 00:40:14.480
So I'm really struggling after that.

515
00:40:14.680 --> 00:40:17.800
Um, just trying to find my way.

516
00:40:21.160 --> 00:40:22.000
Do you want to share?

517
00:40:22.960 --> 00:40:24.320
I don't know what, I don't know.

518
00:40:25.160 --> 00:40:26.120
I don't know what's wrong.

519
00:40:26.120 --> 00:40:35.000
Um, we have a great group of women there that, um, again, it was intense and,

520
00:40:35.520 --> 00:40:43.120
uh, just more healing, more stuff coming out that you need to do to keep moving

521
00:40:43.120 --> 00:40:47.400
forward, you know, it's, this has been like, it's three chapters, so this time

522
00:40:47.400 --> 00:40:51.240
was chapter two and a lot of them aren't saying they're not going to go back for

523
00:40:51.240 --> 00:40:55.800
chapter three, but the way I felt when I got home, I don't know how I can not go

524
00:40:55.800 --> 00:41:05.360
back for chapter three to finish it because I'm still, I'm, I still feel, I

525
00:41:05.360 --> 00:41:06.280
don't even know what I feel.

526
00:41:06.280 --> 00:41:12.520
I feel stuck or I'm just unable to move forward properly, or I go forward and

527
00:41:12.520 --> 00:41:18.160
then I do that, you know, I just, I'm going to do it and then I freeze and then

528
00:41:18.160 --> 00:41:19.600
I'm going to do it and then I freeze.

529
00:41:19.600 --> 00:41:23.520
And I know part of it is my act because my act says I can't do it.

530
00:41:24.400 --> 00:41:25.560
And I fight that every day.

531
00:41:25.560 --> 00:41:30.280
And I, if that isn't one of the worst acts you could ever have, I don't know

532
00:41:30.280 --> 00:41:39.200
what is because everything you do or want to do, it comes, it just, it just

533
00:41:39.240 --> 00:41:43.800
sits on you and makes you, makes me feel like, oh, that's a great idea.

534
00:41:43.840 --> 00:41:44.560
No, I can't do it.

535
00:41:45.720 --> 00:41:48.760
And I'm, I'm really struggling with fighting that.

536
00:41:48.840 --> 00:41:53.960
And, you know, then I got sick too, and I came home from Mexico.

537
00:41:53.960 --> 00:41:54.720
So that didn't help.

538
00:41:55.640 --> 00:41:57.040
That kind of weighs everything down.

539
00:42:00.000 --> 00:42:02.800
Well, and I don't think I'm, I don't think I'm trying hard enough to be close

540
00:42:02.800 --> 00:42:05.760
to God because it's all new to me.

541
00:42:05.760 --> 00:42:07.160
And I, I, I.

542
00:42:09.720 --> 00:42:13.680
So what's coming to me is that you need to stop trying.

543
00:42:17.120 --> 00:42:18.200
Stop trying.

544
00:42:18.400 --> 00:42:18.720
What?

545
00:42:20.120 --> 00:42:21.200
Just stop trying.

546
00:42:22.200 --> 00:42:23.360
You're always trying.

547
00:42:25.400 --> 00:42:27.040
And I always feel like I'm failing.

548
00:42:27.960 --> 00:42:29.360
You're always trying.

549
00:42:31.520 --> 00:42:34.080
Always trying to do something different.

550
00:42:34.080 --> 00:42:38.400
Always trying to do more.

551
00:42:38.560 --> 00:42:44.400
Always trying to be more, always trying to get more out of others.

552
00:42:44.520 --> 00:42:45.080
Just.

553
00:42:49.400 --> 00:42:53.440
Just stop trying and just start allowing.

554
00:42:55.960 --> 00:42:56.320
Okay.

555
00:42:56.320 --> 00:42:57.000
That's a thought.

556
00:43:01.400 --> 00:43:05.600
I, I definitely want all of us.

557
00:43:05.920 --> 00:43:09.040
We don't have to do it on the call, but I definitely want all of us after

558
00:43:09.040 --> 00:43:13.760
the call to pray over Leslie, because I also think, you know, some of this

559
00:43:13.760 --> 00:43:15.440
could definitely be spiritual.

560
00:43:17.520 --> 00:43:19.440
I mean, everything is spiritual, right?

561
00:43:20.560 --> 00:43:27.640
But, um, you know, when we are constantly striving for a goal that we don't

562
00:43:27.640 --> 00:43:32.280
even know what that looks like, we just feel like we're not enough constantly.

563
00:43:33.720 --> 00:43:38.120
That is a black hole that will suck us in every time.

564
00:43:39.120 --> 00:43:42.800
And because you just got back from a healing retreat, some of these

565
00:43:42.800 --> 00:43:45.880
emotions are coming out and this is actually a good thing.

566
00:43:47.040 --> 00:43:48.440
You need to process them.

567
00:43:49.200 --> 00:43:50.680
Don't make yourself wrong.

568
00:43:50.920 --> 00:43:58.040
We're always making ourself wrong for this, uh, process them, get them out.

569
00:43:59.040 --> 00:44:06.040
And don't make it about, you know, why you're not good enough.

570
00:44:06.080 --> 00:44:11.800
Make it about how can I just allow what's happening to me to happen and,

571
00:44:11.880 --> 00:44:15.960
and get through with God by my side and see what he has next for me.

572
00:44:17.640 --> 00:44:20.800
And then be obedient when I, when I'm aware of it and I see it.

573
00:44:21.640 --> 00:44:23.240
Cause I know you, you could see it.

574
00:44:23.280 --> 00:44:25.960
I know you can, I know how intuitive you are.

575
00:44:26.520 --> 00:44:32.680
I know how, um, I know what a gift you have for helping other people.

576
00:44:32.760 --> 00:44:36.200
I can see it because of what you've been through and how you

577
00:44:36.200 --> 00:44:38.320
have that passion to help women.

578
00:44:39.200 --> 00:44:49.280
Um, I, I just really, really, really implore you to allow more in your life

579
00:44:50.080 --> 00:44:53.640
and stop trying as much in your life.

580
00:44:54.160 --> 00:44:56.200
And I really feel like that hits home for you.

581
00:44:57.160 --> 00:44:57.760
It does.

582
00:44:58.600 --> 00:44:59.080
It does.

583
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.760
But, you know, my background was being told I didn't never tried hard enough.

584
00:45:07.440 --> 00:45:11.520
So I guess I'm an over-trier because of that.

585
00:45:13.600 --> 00:45:18.000
And old thoughts are hard to get rid of. I'm working on it, but.

586
00:45:19.280 --> 00:45:22.080
The old man is very hard to get rid of. Yeah.

587
00:45:22.160 --> 00:45:28.480
And you can't be just like with what Lisa shared with

588
00:45:29.200 --> 00:45:32.560
feeling like she doesn't have a home or a community last time.

589
00:45:33.840 --> 00:45:40.000
It's very difficult for God to put you on a plan and a trajectory that goes quickly.

590
00:45:41.760 --> 00:45:43.840
If you're not going to allow him to do it.

591
00:45:43.840 --> 00:45:50.160
It. And that old man is extremely hard to get rid of.

592
00:45:50.160 --> 00:45:53.840
Ask me how I know, because you always want to do it your own way.

593
00:45:55.440 --> 00:45:59.840
Even when we know we shouldn't do it our own way, taking over and doing it our own way,

594
00:45:59.840 --> 00:46:05.840
thinking we're not doing enough is such a trap from the enemy. It's such a trap.

595
00:46:06.560 --> 00:46:10.560
So if you want to get on a financial plan, a business plan, a life plan,

596
00:46:10.560 --> 00:46:18.640
a weight loss plan, a spiritual plan. Yeah. It's hard to do when you just want to create

597
00:46:18.640 --> 00:46:22.960
the plan yourself and then back away from it because you know, it's not right anyway.

598
00:46:26.160 --> 00:46:28.960
Something in your spirit is saying to you, Leslie,

599
00:46:30.720 --> 00:46:35.760
I can't do this because this is not, this is in my own strength.

600
00:46:36.080 --> 00:46:40.240
I can't do this in my own strength. Maybe it's not the right plan.

601
00:46:40.880 --> 00:46:43.520
Maybe you just need to allow that plan to come forward.

602
00:46:46.640 --> 00:46:52.400
But don't make it. It's funny in the, in the network marketing sector that I'm in it,

603
00:46:52.400 --> 00:47:01.040
they tell you how to do everything and it doesn't align with, with how I help people. I, I just,

604
00:47:01.040 --> 00:47:06.800
I have to wait for the ideas to come and, and I put forth what comes out of my heart and you can't,

605
00:47:07.600 --> 00:47:12.400
you can't, it's not in a book. That's not in a book. It comes from here. It doesn't come from

606
00:47:12.400 --> 00:47:20.000
pages, you know? So I'm kind of going against the sell, sell, sell thing because I'm sharing.

607
00:47:20.000 --> 00:47:27.280
I'm not selling, I'm sharing. And it's really hard to be patient when you're sharing and telling

608
00:47:27.680 --> 00:47:32.960
yourself that down the road, it will result. Cause you know, we want it yesterday. We all want it

609
00:47:32.960 --> 00:47:38.960
yesterday. We just do. So I, I'm just, but I am going against the grain and I'm just,

610
00:47:40.000 --> 00:47:45.520
when the idea comes, then I make a post and it's from the heart and that's how I have to do it.

611
00:47:45.520 --> 00:47:52.480
It's the only way I know how, so. I'm not saying to keep, not keep showing up, by the way. No,

612
00:47:53.360 --> 00:48:03.360
no, no, I know. Yeah. I, I, I just think showing up in a different way and what you just described

613
00:48:03.360 --> 00:48:09.120
is not what, what you just described is not the emotions that I heard coming out from you

614
00:48:09.680 --> 00:48:19.600
five minutes ago. Okay. So what you just described sounds very like you're, you're in flow,

615
00:48:19.600 --> 00:48:23.680
like everything, you know, your, your actions are in flow. Everything is in flow,

616
00:48:24.320 --> 00:48:30.800
but five minutes ago, you said, you know, basically I start things and I don't finish,

617
00:48:30.800 --> 00:48:38.800
or I start this and I say, I can't do it. So I guess my question is, and I'm not making this

618
00:48:38.800 --> 00:48:45.520
wrong. This is all good. My question is where, why is that? Where is that conflict?

619
00:48:46.480 --> 00:48:52.240
I think consistency is drilled into our heads all the time. And if you don't have an idea all

620
00:48:52.240 --> 00:48:58.960
the time, you're not consistent. And I can't have, they come when they come, the ideas come when

621
00:48:58.960 --> 00:49:04.800
they come. So I'm beating myself up over lack of consistency that I really don't think I have

622
00:49:04.800 --> 00:49:12.080
control over because when it comes to me, I do it. And when, when I do it, I make it the best

623
00:49:12.080 --> 00:49:19.120
I make it the best that I can. So that has maximum impact to help people. You know,

624
00:49:19.120 --> 00:49:25.120
I don't want to go out there and do this half ass thing for lack of better words. Sorry.

625
00:49:25.120 --> 00:49:30.320
You know, just throw it out there. There's so much crap out there. I don't want it to be crap.

626
00:49:30.320 --> 00:49:37.040
I want it to be quality. So what you're really suffering from is guilt and shame.

627
00:49:38.000 --> 00:49:41.280
You're guilty and shame yourself constantly. Yeah. Yeah. That fits.

628
00:49:43.360 --> 00:49:49.520
And that's hard on you. That's hard on your body. Oh yeah. Yeah. That's so hard on you.

629
00:49:50.640 --> 00:49:53.520
And so Angela shared some prayers in the chat.

630
00:49:53.520 --> 00:49:59.840
Yeah. I see that. I'm going to, I'm going to take pictures of them. Are they from that book?

631
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:01.000
Do we know?

632
00:50:01.000 --> 00:50:02.000
Yes.

633
00:50:02.000 --> 00:50:03.000
She said from the book.

634
00:50:03.000 --> 00:50:04.000
Mm hmm.

635
00:50:04.000 --> 00:50:05.000
Yeah.

636
00:50:05.000 --> 00:50:06.000
Cause I wrote down that book too.

637
00:50:06.000 --> 00:50:09.200
I need all the help I can get around prayers.

638
00:50:09.200 --> 00:50:10.200
Well we all do.

639
00:50:10.200 --> 00:50:17.360
And so I just, I really want to stress how important it is to put, to clarify what, what

640
00:50:17.360 --> 00:50:19.440
is attacking you.

641
00:50:19.440 --> 00:50:22.680
I feel like it's the enemy.

642
00:50:22.680 --> 00:50:28.200
Well he's attacking you with guilt and shame to, to really dig into the right questions

643
00:50:28.200 --> 00:50:33.040
around what you're, what you're feeling or what any of us are feeling, asking those questions

644
00:50:33.040 --> 00:50:37.960
is very important because when we can pinpoint specifically, Lord, I cast out this guilt

645
00:50:37.960 --> 00:50:38.960
and shame.

646
00:50:38.960 --> 00:50:40.680
It is not from you.

647
00:50:40.680 --> 00:50:42.860
That is from the enemy.

648
00:50:42.860 --> 00:50:44.100
We have a target.

649
00:50:44.100 --> 00:50:48.280
We have something to cast out of ourselves versus Lord, I don't know why I'm feeling

650
00:50:48.280 --> 00:50:54.000
this way, but cast out, you know, the enemy specifically praying for guilt and shame to

651
00:50:54.000 --> 00:51:00.600
leave now in the name of Jesus, because it is not you okay.

652
00:51:00.600 --> 00:51:09.800
Filling you with the joy of the Holy spirit, filling you back up with peace, any fruit

653
00:51:09.800 --> 00:51:14.280
of the spirit that you feel you're called to be filled with in that moment.

654
00:51:14.280 --> 00:51:19.880
I think that's your prayer because from what, from, like I said, from what you shared at

655
00:51:19.880 --> 00:51:24.480
the beginning to like, this is, this is what I'm, I've been doing.

656
00:51:24.480 --> 00:51:27.440
I'm like, well, there's nothing wrong with what you've been doing.

657
00:51:27.440 --> 00:51:29.280
Where, where is this coming from?

658
00:51:29.280 --> 00:51:33.600
You know, it'd be one thing if you said, I'm not doing anything, I'm totally paralyzed.

659
00:51:33.600 --> 00:51:34.880
I'm not doing anything.

660
00:51:34.880 --> 00:51:35.880
Okay.

661
00:51:35.880 --> 00:51:39.880
Well, there's, there's ways out of that, but just not making yourself wrong.

662
00:51:39.880 --> 00:51:42.560
Just stop and stop.

663
00:51:42.560 --> 00:51:48.520
Stop making yourself wrong.

664
00:51:48.520 --> 00:51:51.200
And then see what plan comes through.

665
00:51:51.200 --> 00:51:54.320
Yeah.

666
00:51:54.320 --> 00:51:58.320
Because like you said, you know, we've talked about many plans on here, you know, financial

667
00:51:58.320 --> 00:52:04.440
plans and, and different ways to shift money, to pray, pray over your business.

668
00:52:04.440 --> 00:52:08.840
But if you have a step-by-step guide of how to do that, but it's not right for you and

669
00:52:08.840 --> 00:52:13.000
called for your life, you're not, it's not what you should do.

670
00:52:13.000 --> 00:52:14.000
Yeah.

671
00:52:14.000 --> 00:52:15.000
And it does.

672
00:52:15.000 --> 00:52:16.000
It just doesn't feel right.

673
00:52:16.000 --> 00:52:17.000
Yeah.

674
00:52:17.000 --> 00:52:23.360
And I have to do it the way, the way I'm all, I'm just going to say the way that I know

675
00:52:23.360 --> 00:52:30.040
to do it from my heart, what has helped to heal me and what I know so many other women

676
00:52:30.040 --> 00:52:32.600
out there need that they're just not getting.

677
00:52:32.600 --> 00:52:34.720
And a lot of it is because they can't afford it.

678
00:52:34.720 --> 00:52:41.360
So I'm giving it, I'm not, you know, the help that I give around healing from abuse is free

679
00:52:41.360 --> 00:52:46.200
because not everybody can afford $150 an hour, you know?

680
00:52:46.400 --> 00:52:54.280
So why wouldn't I share what I've learned that works just for the sake of sharing it?

681
00:52:54.280 --> 00:52:57.800
So it's not just about selling products.

682
00:52:57.800 --> 00:52:58.800
Absolutely.

683
00:52:58.800 --> 00:52:59.800
Yeah.

684
00:52:59.800 --> 00:53:07.760
Where, where have you seen God show up in a powerful way in your life recently?

685
00:53:07.760 --> 00:53:13.240
I think, Oh, I know you're going to love this at the retreat.

686
00:53:13.240 --> 00:53:16.440
I have to write this down because I think I almost forgot.

687
00:53:16.440 --> 00:53:26.440
At the retreat, we went through what they call, what do they call them?

688
00:53:26.440 --> 00:53:30.480
We give ourselves, no, jobs is not the right roles.

689
00:53:30.480 --> 00:53:35.160
We assume roles in order to survive what we're going through.

690
00:53:35.160 --> 00:53:42.400
And one of my roles was trophy partner, you had to be perfect all the time and, you know,

691
00:53:42.560 --> 00:53:43.560
always do the right thing.

692
00:53:43.560 --> 00:53:44.800
And I could never do it.

693
00:53:44.800 --> 00:53:48.960
So I don't even know why he kept trying to pound it into my head, but anyways.

694
00:53:48.960 --> 00:53:58.240
So we have to let go of these trope, these, the roles that we play and what scares you

695
00:53:58.240 --> 00:54:03.040
about letting go of those roles because they've been part of your life for however long they've

696
00:54:03.040 --> 00:54:04.040
been part of your life.

697
00:54:04.040 --> 00:54:06.320
And for my life, they were 32 years.

698
00:54:06.320 --> 00:54:10.040
There was a lot of them, people pleaser, all those things.

699
00:54:10.040 --> 00:54:17.480
So we had to write down on this piece of paper that we ended up burning in a barrel.

700
00:54:17.480 --> 00:54:20.880
So what makes you afraid?

701
00:54:20.880 --> 00:54:25.320
And I sat back and I knew what my answer was.

702
00:54:25.320 --> 00:54:31.000
And I was like, where did that come from?

703
00:54:31.000 --> 00:54:32.560
I can't do it.

704
00:54:32.560 --> 00:54:33.560
That's what my answer was.

705
00:54:33.560 --> 00:54:37.880
And I was like, what is going on here?

706
00:54:37.880 --> 00:54:41.400
Two worlds just collided this world.

707
00:54:41.400 --> 00:54:44.520
And that, yeah, like it came, I've got chills thinking about it now.

708
00:54:44.520 --> 00:54:46.200
It just came out of nowhere.

709
00:54:46.200 --> 00:54:48.320
I went and showed the psychologist there.

710
00:54:48.320 --> 00:54:51.320
I said, does this fit for me in your opinion?

711
00:54:51.320 --> 00:54:52.320
She goes, absolutely.

712
00:54:52.320 --> 00:54:55.360
I said, I can't even tell you where it came from.

713
00:54:55.360 --> 00:54:57.400
You won't believe me, but she's Christian.

714
00:54:57.400 --> 00:54:59.560
So we did talk about it afterwards.

715
00:54:59.560 --> 00:55:00.000
And she said.

716
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:07.040
Oh wow, that's just so she said write it down we're gonna burn it tonight and we did so

717
00:55:07.040 --> 00:55:12.940
I feel a little bit of freedom from it like I feel like I'm making gains but I guess I've

718
00:55:12.940 --> 00:55:21.260
been in this place for so long I just want to be free so bad and just get on with it

719
00:55:21.260 --> 00:55:26.380
that I just feel like I keep getting attacked and pushed back down and I don't want to anymore

720
00:55:26.380 --> 00:55:33.720
I want to get out and go and just gets it's just hard to have it not happen as fast as

721
00:55:33.720 --> 00:55:42.020
you need for it to to feel free I mean the clock's ticking man I'm 65 you know you look

722
00:55:42.020 --> 00:55:50.660
incredible let's just start there yeah I mean any for anybody transitioning into the new

723
00:55:50.660 --> 00:55:56.140
man is tough but for somebody who's been told by many people in their lives that they can't

724
00:55:56.140 --> 00:56:00.100
do it because of how powerful you are and they know it's not true to bring you down

725
00:56:00.100 --> 00:56:08.260
to where they want you to be your your body is physically addicted to I can't do it your

726
00:56:08.260 --> 00:56:17.180
mind is physically addicted to I can't do it so your spirit and your soul have to take

727
00:56:17.180 --> 00:56:25.980
over they have to start taking over and it's not going to be easy so it's not easy yeah

728
00:56:25.980 --> 00:56:32.780
I implore you to just stay strong and pray through it and pray that guilt and shame off

729
00:56:32.780 --> 00:56:40.340
of you and also pray the guilt and shame off of you that you feel when you are beating

730
00:56:40.340 --> 00:56:45.780
yourself up again or saying you can't do it yeah I thought I was doing a lot better with

731
00:56:45.780 --> 00:56:52.700
that but it comes it it comes back on you you know it's like a like the roller coaster

732
00:56:52.700 --> 00:56:56.100
like if you could have seen I can't believe I'm gonna say this but if you could have seen

733
00:56:56.100 --> 00:57:02.380
me just out in my garage bawling my eyes out over this stupid sander because I shouldn't

734
00:57:02.380 --> 00:57:08.260
even have to do this this is a man's job why why I just wanted to go sand my driveway and

735
00:57:08.260 --> 00:57:11.860
now the thing doesn't work and I don't know how to fix it and I'm just standing there

736
00:57:11.860 --> 00:57:19.460
crying and just saying God please just please why can't it just work when I need it to work

737
00:57:19.460 --> 00:57:26.020
I just I don't understand so I can't believe I just shared that but anyway so then I wasn't

738
00:57:26.020 --> 00:57:31.940
even gonna come on here because I've all been there by the way yeah I was there last week

739
00:57:31.940 --> 00:57:37.060
oh okay I'm gonna say good but I don't mean good that you were there good that I'm not

740
00:57:37.060 --> 00:57:42.500
alone because I feel crazy when that happens crazy and I just I wasn't even gonna come

741
00:57:42.500 --> 00:57:47.700
on here I thought no I can't I can't put this hat on because I'm such a mess and this hat

742
00:57:47.700 --> 00:57:53.420
brings me so much peace and okay you know what no you're gonna put this down you're

743
00:57:53.420 --> 00:58:00.740
gonna go on that zoom and pray for the best and I have to say I have no regret for being

744
00:58:00.740 --> 00:58:06.740
here it was the best thing I could have done for myself today yeah I I really appreciate

745
00:58:07.460 --> 00:58:13.940
everything I'm getting out of this and it really did lift me today I'm so grateful I'm so grateful

746
00:58:14.500 --> 00:58:22.260
and I'm not kidding you I I go through that at least once a month oh wow really because I think

747
00:58:22.260 --> 00:58:28.500
it's about once a month for me too oh my gosh I I think if we're all honest we all we all do

748
00:58:28.500 --> 00:58:35.860
I mean there are moments in my life where I just hate the world yeah yep for no reason

749
00:58:36.420 --> 00:58:44.340
for no reason yeah and that is a thousand percent a spiritual attack we are not crazy

750
00:58:44.340 --> 00:58:50.100
we are being attacked the enemy is so clever and the more that we realize that and the more that

751
00:58:50.100 --> 00:58:55.540
we acknowledge that the less time we spend thinking that it's something we're doing or

752
00:58:55.540 --> 00:59:00.900
something that we're messed up with or something we did wrong or that this you know worrying about

753
00:59:00.900 --> 00:59:06.820
the circumstance the more that we realize that the faster we come out of it and so it's just

754
00:59:06.820 --> 00:59:14.260
practice we're we're practicing that's what I'm gonna practice I'm well see now you just said

755
00:59:14.260 --> 00:59:20.340
don't try so hard I'm just gonna say I'm gonna practice a lot harder no no you can't practice

756
00:59:20.340 --> 00:59:31.140
harder you have to be pretty darn hard I am I am I'm exhausted most of the time yeah just sit back

757
00:59:31.140 --> 00:59:37.620
and and just practice when when the situation comes but it's not that when we all know this

758
00:59:37.620 --> 00:59:40.500
it's not that it's not going to come it's just you're going to get out of it quicker

759
00:59:42.740 --> 00:59:48.660
and that's that's life we just keep showing up you just keep showing up keep showing up keep

760
00:59:48.660 --> 00:59:55.220
showing up and eventually you wear the enemy out so hard that he leaves you alone for a little while

761
00:59:55.220 --> 00:59:59.860
and then you know later on he tries to creep on back but and by then you forgot

762
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:02.240
and it's him and you start blaming yourself again.

763
01:00:02.240 --> 01:00:03.580
Yeah.

764
01:00:03.580 --> 01:00:04.540
Right?

765
01:00:04.540 --> 01:00:06.560
That's the power of things like this.

766
01:00:06.560 --> 01:00:08.640
We've come to remind you.

767
01:00:08.640 --> 01:00:09.480
Yeah.

768
01:00:09.480 --> 01:00:11.800
I appreciate you all.

769
01:00:11.800 --> 01:00:13.420
I do so much.

770
01:00:14.480 --> 01:00:16.600
And where I'm supposed to be.

771
01:00:16.600 --> 01:00:18.200
Thank you for being vulnerable.

772
01:00:19.920 --> 01:00:21.400
It's just truth.

773
01:00:21.400 --> 01:00:22.840
Yeah.

774
01:00:22.840 --> 01:00:25.520
Sarah, I wanna make sure that we give you

775
01:00:25.520 --> 01:00:26.620
the time you deserve.

776
01:00:26.620 --> 01:00:29.840
So are you there?

777
01:00:29.920 --> 01:00:31.000
Are you still there?

778
01:00:35.320 --> 01:00:36.400
Hey, I'm here.

779
01:00:36.400 --> 01:00:41.400
Sorry, I've had a disgusting migraine half the day.

780
01:00:42.440 --> 01:00:43.840
So I'm a bit foggy.

781
01:00:43.840 --> 01:00:46.500
Trying to put up my camera.

782
01:00:48.800 --> 01:00:50.640
I don't know if I have much to share.

783
01:00:58.120 --> 01:00:59.040
I don't know.

784
01:00:59.080 --> 01:01:01.200
I kind of feel like Leslie at times,

785
01:01:01.200 --> 01:01:02.320
like just a mess.

786
01:01:02.320 --> 01:01:06.720
Like sometimes it's very obvious.

787
01:01:06.720 --> 01:01:08.640
And then other times I'm just like,

788
01:01:08.640 --> 01:01:09.920
okay, God, where are you?

789
01:01:12.880 --> 01:01:16.120
The last month has been,

790
01:01:19.560 --> 01:01:22.360
so my son had a lump on his neck

791
01:01:22.360 --> 01:01:25.060
that was stressing me out for a long time.

792
01:01:25.960 --> 01:01:27.600
And he figured that out.

793
01:01:27.600 --> 01:01:32.000
And then he was supposed to have surgery last Monday.

794
01:01:33.800 --> 01:01:36.800
So not two days ago, but the Monday before.

795
01:01:36.800 --> 01:01:41.800
And insurance wasn't going to cover it.

796
01:01:43.520 --> 01:01:46.080
They weren't getting ahold of them.

797
01:01:46.080 --> 01:01:48.920
And so surgery got canceled.

798
01:01:48.920 --> 01:01:50.760
Can only be done by one specialist

799
01:01:52.600 --> 01:01:54.800
because it's wrapped around his nerve

800
01:01:54.800 --> 01:01:57.920
that singles his brain to make him smile.

801
01:01:58.760 --> 01:02:03.760
So he's now doing surgery on this Monday.

802
01:02:03.880 --> 01:02:06.960
So that has been a huge stress for me.

803
01:02:09.000 --> 01:02:11.600
We have our second daughter getting married

804
01:02:11.600 --> 01:02:13.040
and they got married.

805
01:02:13.040 --> 01:02:14.640
They're getting married almost to the day,

806
01:02:14.640 --> 01:02:16.840
seven months apart from each other.

807
01:02:16.840 --> 01:02:18.600
So that has been a huge,

808
01:02:19.520 --> 01:02:24.520
just a lot of stuff that has to happen with the wedding.

809
01:02:25.280 --> 01:02:29.880
And she also just brought her first house a week ago.

810
01:02:29.880 --> 01:02:32.360
So that has been an added stress

811
01:02:32.360 --> 01:02:37.280
of the expectations of mom stopped to do everything

812
01:02:38.560 --> 01:02:42.560
because I always have stopped my whole life for my kids.

813
01:02:42.560 --> 01:02:45.000
And so that expectation is still there

814
01:02:45.000 --> 01:02:48.080
even though they're adults.

815
01:02:49.640 --> 01:02:51.440
I do still have one living at home.

816
01:02:51.440 --> 01:02:52.800
Well, two are living at home.

817
01:02:52.800 --> 01:02:55.280
The one that's getting married and the younger one,

818
01:02:55.280 --> 01:02:58.040
but the one that's getting married has a house.

819
01:02:58.040 --> 01:03:00.480
But she's living at home until her wedding night.

820
01:03:01.840 --> 01:03:03.520
But I mean, she's an adult.

821
01:03:03.520 --> 01:03:06.600
She's not under my locking key, right?

822
01:03:08.600 --> 01:03:10.600
But just, I feel like we've just had lots

823
01:03:10.600 --> 01:03:12.600
of like spiritual attacks.

824
01:03:12.600 --> 01:03:14.880
My son walked out to his car lot yesterday

825
01:03:15.760 --> 01:03:18.320
and there's a huge hole in the back of his window.

826
01:03:18.320 --> 01:03:22.760
And the whole back of the car is caving in.

827
01:03:24.920 --> 01:03:28.480
It's just been like one like catastrophe

828
01:03:28.480 --> 01:03:31.000
after the next, after the next.

829
01:03:31.000 --> 01:03:34.920
The last meeting we were on with you,

830
01:03:35.800 --> 01:03:39.240
I was here and 45 minutes into the meeting,

831
01:03:39.240 --> 01:03:41.560
maybe 40 minutes into the meeting,

832
01:03:41.560 --> 01:03:44.880
my soon-to-be son-in-law calls me in tears.

833
01:03:44.880 --> 01:03:46.240
I think I'm getting fired.

834
01:03:47.880 --> 01:03:50.320
Goes off for an emergency.

835
01:03:50.320 --> 01:03:53.720
I had two kids get in car accidents.

836
01:03:53.720 --> 01:03:55.200
I mean, this is all since January.

837
01:03:55.200 --> 01:04:00.200
It's just been literally one crazy thing

838
01:04:00.880 --> 01:04:02.840
after the next, after the next, after the next.

839
01:04:02.840 --> 01:04:07.640
Is it mainly, does it mainly have to do with your children?

840
01:04:09.040 --> 01:04:09.880
Yeah.

841
01:04:11.560 --> 01:04:16.560
I, there's been one thing that was, that's in me.

842
01:04:20.160 --> 01:04:23.800
I went to a, this is the year that I decided

843
01:04:23.800 --> 01:04:26.000
that I was going to stop procrastinating.

844
01:04:26.000 --> 01:04:27.680
And I was going to do all the things that I've said

845
01:04:27.680 --> 01:04:29.680
I've always, always, always going to do.

846
01:04:31.280 --> 01:04:36.280
So in January, I went to an appointment

847
01:04:37.120 --> 01:04:39.200
to change my last name for the first,

848
01:04:39.240 --> 01:04:42.080
I've been married 24 years and never changed my last name.

849
01:04:43.280 --> 01:04:47.800
And so in January, I went to an appointment

850
01:04:47.800 --> 01:04:50.040
that got pushed back, but we did it in February.

851
01:04:50.040 --> 01:04:51.480
My name was officially changed,

852
01:04:51.480 --> 01:04:53.120
got my new social security card.

853
01:04:53.120 --> 01:04:54.800
So check mark.

854
01:04:54.800 --> 01:04:57.280
So I decided that my thing in February

855
01:04:57.280 --> 01:04:59.000
that I was going to not procrastinate anymore

856
01:04:59.000 --> 01:05:00.400
was I was going to go get.

857
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:09.760
first mammogram. And of course it came back last, so I did it last Tuesday. And Tuesday at midnight,

858
01:05:09.760 --> 01:05:15.920
I'm checking my reports and there's something suspicious. So I have to go back for more

859
01:05:15.920 --> 01:05:27.520
testing. And so that's been really heavy the last week. I was supposed to go to a cardiologist's

860
01:05:27.520 --> 01:05:32.800
appointment this morning. I am fairly young and was diagnosed with AFib.

861
01:05:35.440 --> 01:05:39.840
And I woke up with a blazing migraine. Actually, I woke up to a tornado warning

862
01:05:39.840 --> 01:05:45.920
that then realized I had a migraine. And so I've, and I've, this is like the fourth or

863
01:05:45.920 --> 01:05:53.280
fifth migraine in the last few weeks. And I used to get them all the time and I stopped

864
01:05:53.920 --> 01:05:58.720
and now they're back again. So I don't want to say it's only my kids, but it has a lot to do with

865
01:06:00.880 --> 01:06:12.640
my kids. So the a lot of people think that the enemy attack circumstances,

866
01:06:14.480 --> 01:06:20.880
but the enemy actually attacks our heart. He's not interested in our circumstances. He wants our

867
01:06:20.880 --> 01:06:28.320
heart. He wants our soul. And so whatever is nearest and dear to your heart, when you're on

868
01:06:28.320 --> 01:06:35.920
the right path and you start going down the right path, that's where he wants to get a foothold

869
01:06:37.520 --> 01:06:43.920
and get, get in, get in your life. So I'm not surprised at all that many of these

870
01:06:44.560 --> 01:06:48.400
different things that have been happening are having to do with your kids.

871
01:06:50.000 --> 01:06:53.840
I mean, this is not a coincidence in any way, shape or form. This is a lot

872
01:06:54.560 --> 01:07:01.120
in a short period of time with your children. And of course that can manifest in you.

873
01:07:02.480 --> 01:07:08.240
So he's, yeah, I feel like I was making a breakthrough. This was probably three or four

874
01:07:08.880 --> 01:07:18.480
weeks ago. And I sent Ray a bunch of texts and I felt like, Oh gosh, I'm finally like,

875
01:07:18.480 --> 01:07:24.240
I felt like I was about to like hit a breakthrough. And he was like, do you have time to talk

876
01:07:24.880 --> 01:07:29.360
this morning? I was like, yeah, it was early in the morning. I was like, yep.

877
01:07:29.920 --> 01:07:36.240
Have time to talk, can talk. And I don't even remember which one of the many things that

878
01:07:36.240 --> 01:07:42.400
it's happened over the last three months that, that it was. But one of those things happened

879
01:07:42.400 --> 01:07:49.200
literally within probably 30 minutes of me saying, yes, I can talk. I never even saw his

880
01:07:49.200 --> 01:07:54.640
message that said, okay, what's your phone number? I never even got back to my phone

881
01:07:54.640 --> 01:08:00.560
for hours upon hours upon hours. And then the guilt of like, well, I never even answered him.

882
01:08:01.520 --> 01:08:09.600
Hmm. And so all of that, that I felt like I was on the breakthrough of just kind of

883
01:08:10.720 --> 01:08:19.520
squirreled away because I got wrapped up in the next catastrophe with the kids and then the next

884
01:08:19.520 --> 01:08:26.399
one and the next one. And I used, when they were younger, I used to tell my husband all the time,

885
01:08:26.399 --> 01:08:30.399
I always felt like I was putting out fires all day long. We were a homeschool family. So we were

886
01:08:30.479 --> 01:08:33.920
at home and I always just felt like I was putting out fires all day long. And there were days that

887
01:08:33.920 --> 01:08:38.880
she would come home and I'd say, I don't know what we accomplished today. I don't know if we

888
01:08:38.880 --> 01:08:45.200
accomplished any homeschooling today, or I don't know if we accomplished any housework or whatever

889
01:08:45.200 --> 01:08:49.359
it was that we were supposed to accomplish. And I just was putting out fires all day.

890
01:08:50.240 --> 01:08:57.600
And for some reason, I feel like I'm back in that, that rat race of like putting out fires

891
01:08:57.600 --> 01:09:02.560
constantly. And I didn't feel like I was there for several years. So it's.

892
01:09:03.439 --> 01:09:04.479
What was your mom like?

893
01:09:14.399 --> 01:09:16.800
She was a single, she was a single mom for a while.

894
01:09:19.200 --> 01:09:22.479
And she had really hard marriages. I,

895
01:09:23.040 --> 01:09:28.080
the first guy she was married to was abusive and she left. Married my dad, who was apparently

896
01:09:28.080 --> 01:09:38.080
abusive too. My dad died when he was 32. I was seven. So I don't know much about him other than

897
01:09:39.920 --> 01:09:46.319
in frustration with her, she will sometimes blurt out like something and I'll learn a little bit of

898
01:09:46.399 --> 01:09:51.279
like something and I'll learn a little bit of a tidbit of information.

899
01:09:54.000 --> 01:09:59.760
She showed a lot. She showed her love through buying stuff.

900
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:12.640
still does to this day. I won't say she was a bad mom, but she was never very

901
01:10:15.040 --> 01:10:21.520
open about talking about things, still isn't. If you bring up anything

902
01:10:21.520 --> 01:10:28.320
emotionally that you want to talk about, it gets shut down immediately.

903
01:10:38.320 --> 01:10:41.520
You know, I don't know, because now that I think about it,

904
01:10:44.400 --> 01:10:51.360
I'm very emotional to my kids. I'm the complete opposite. Like we're very, very close. We talk,

905
01:10:51.440 --> 01:11:02.720
all the time. My son is 25 and we're, we're super close and that's not probably the norm, but

906
01:11:08.480 --> 01:11:11.280
I don't know, maybe that, maybe that has something to do with that. I don't know.

907
01:11:11.280 --> 01:11:22.400
Kind of blessing that you're super close and that you went the opposite direction. So

908
01:11:26.880 --> 01:11:32.240
I give my time. I won't necessarily, where my mom gave her money all the time.

909
01:11:42.000 --> 01:11:48.480
My mom, I'm trying to think of the best way to frame this here, but I'll just say it. So my mom

910
01:11:49.120 --> 01:11:58.880
would she was a great mom at times. She was crazy at other times, literally, you know, now as,

911
01:11:58.880 --> 01:12:06.400
as a mom and as a woman, you know, I wonder at times if she was just going through menopause or,

912
01:12:07.280 --> 01:12:10.080
you know, everyone around her thought she was going crazy or what, but, you know,

913
01:12:10.080 --> 01:12:12.560
tried to kill herself, a lot of things. I think, you know, my story,

914
01:12:14.480 --> 01:12:24.320
bipolar diagnosed with bipolarity and, and all kinds of stuff. And so that created in me,

915
01:12:25.520 --> 01:12:35.920
this craving to be a victim. And I didn't recognize it, but my children would do things

916
01:12:36.480 --> 01:12:41.040
and I would just be like, I can't believe they're doing this to me. I'm so sweet to them. I'm so

917
01:12:41.040 --> 01:12:46.960
loving how, why, why, why are they doing this to me? Why, why is this happening to me? Why,

918
01:12:46.960 --> 01:12:55.440
why is this happening to me? Because I crave so much the love of a normal family. I craved so much

919
01:12:56.000 --> 01:13:01.680
to feel that love that I never got from my family. And I never got, I felt I got from my mom,

920
01:13:01.680 --> 01:13:08.640
from my kids that I turned myself into a victim in every circumstance.

921
01:13:10.560 --> 01:13:14.400
And what you're going through right now is extremely challenging. And so I'm not

922
01:13:15.280 --> 01:13:21.680
looking to guilt you or chastise you. I'm sharing with you my experience of when I recognize that

923
01:13:22.880 --> 01:13:29.440
my walk in life with the family that I was gifted and the things that I went through,

924
01:13:30.000 --> 01:13:41.280
both amazing and not good. My walk in life has gotten a lot simpler and a lot easier when I

925
01:13:41.280 --> 01:13:50.080
abolished the guilt around what I was doing as a mom. And when I walked in a victor mentality

926
01:13:50.080 --> 01:13:59.200
versus the victim mentality and when circumstances arise that are literally an attack on our most

927
01:13:59.200 --> 01:14:09.840
precious asset of our heart, that is when the practice ensues of really stepping into that

928
01:14:09.840 --> 01:14:20.480
victor mentality and mindset and not allowing it to penetrate each and every moment of our day.

929
01:14:21.440 --> 01:14:31.760
Because Sarah, I bet you that you were on the verge of doing something incredible. I don't know

930
01:14:31.760 --> 01:14:37.840
what that is, but I bet you that you were on the verge earlier this year of doing something

931
01:14:37.840 --> 01:14:45.200
incredible or having something incredible show up in your life. And this is all a distraction

932
01:14:45.200 --> 01:14:57.200
to keep you a victim. And I have to practice this every day. I have to practice stepping out of that

933
01:14:57.200 --> 01:14:59.840
because I crave that so much.

934
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:05.000
from how my mom was as a mom, I felt victimized.

935
01:15:05.320 --> 01:15:09.100
I felt like nobody heard me and I felt out of control.

936
01:15:10.440 --> 01:15:13.840
And the one way I can control people's feelings

937
01:15:13.840 --> 01:15:16.560
and emotions around me, including my kids,

938
01:15:16.560 --> 01:15:19.640
was by stepping into that space.

939
01:15:20.720 --> 01:15:22.980
And also it avoids the disappointment

940
01:15:22.980 --> 01:15:24.760
and not getting that love back.

941
01:15:24.760 --> 01:15:29.440
And so as there's a lot of challenging things happening

942
01:15:29.480 --> 01:15:32.240
in your life right now, and the circumstances are tough,

943
01:15:34.160 --> 01:15:37.400
it is so important for you right now

944
01:15:37.400 --> 01:15:42.400
to step into claiming the victory over your family.

945
01:15:42.920 --> 01:15:46.120
And I know that you know that as a Christian

946
01:15:46.120 --> 01:15:48.080
and you know that as a woman,

947
01:15:49.340 --> 01:15:52.360
and the enemy is keeping your emotional state high,

948
01:15:53.720 --> 01:15:55.640
he's keeping your stress high,

949
01:15:55.640 --> 01:15:58.760
he's keeping your brain foggy

950
01:16:00.120 --> 01:16:02.880
so that you don't step into that place.

951
01:16:05.040 --> 01:16:09.340
The victim, people look at, say, don't be a victim,

952
01:16:09.340 --> 01:16:10.760
don't be a victim, but don't be a victim.

953
01:16:10.760 --> 01:16:13.320
But do they really know how hard that is?

954
01:16:18.080 --> 01:16:20.440
If they really knew how hard it was,

955
01:16:20.440 --> 01:16:22.900
they would run to the Bible every time.

956
01:16:22.900 --> 01:16:25.520
And Angela has given some amazing scriptures

957
01:16:26.360 --> 01:16:27.560
in here to run to.

958
01:16:27.560 --> 01:16:32.560
It is hard to not be a victim, hard, hard, hard.

959
01:16:35.320 --> 01:16:40.320
So my encouragement would be to really try

960
01:16:42.000 --> 01:16:44.720
to embrace the victor mentality

961
01:16:44.720 --> 01:16:46.680
because it's gonna go against everything

962
01:16:46.680 --> 01:16:50.040
in your nature right now.

963
01:16:50.040 --> 01:16:52.080
And the only reason I know is because

964
01:16:52.080 --> 01:16:54.820
I've been in that situation,

965
01:16:55.220 --> 01:16:57.380
maybe not the health situation,

966
01:16:57.380 --> 01:17:01.380
but I've definitely had health struggles with our children,

967
01:17:01.380 --> 01:17:04.940
which obviously for any mom is way worse

968
01:17:04.940 --> 01:17:07.460
than even what we're going through, right?

969
01:17:07.460 --> 01:17:10.340
Definitely had health struggles with the kids.

970
01:17:10.340 --> 01:17:15.340
So stepping into that victor mentality is so key.

971
01:17:16.100 --> 01:17:21.100
And speaking that life into your circumstance,

972
01:17:21.460 --> 01:17:25.220
your kids, your health, speaking that over you

973
01:17:27.060 --> 01:17:29.620
and your family is going to be more important now

974
01:17:29.620 --> 01:17:30.900
than it ever was.

975
01:17:32.660 --> 01:17:36.820
And I can guarantee you, I can guarantee you

976
01:17:36.820 --> 01:17:40.120
that if you do that, things are gonna start changing

977
01:17:40.120 --> 01:17:43.340
and you're gonna step into some really amazing things

978
01:17:43.340 --> 01:17:47.060
because I can see how big this distraction is.

979
01:17:47.060 --> 01:17:50.260
And it is big, which means that there's a huge call

980
01:17:50.300 --> 01:17:51.140
on your life.

981
01:17:53.740 --> 01:17:57.460
You need to start proclaiming just really, really,

982
01:17:57.460 --> 01:17:59.460
every time you remember it.

983
01:17:59.460 --> 01:18:02.180
And there's gonna be times where you fail at it

984
01:18:02.180 --> 01:18:03.020
and that's okay.

985
01:18:03.020 --> 01:18:04.260
We all do.

986
01:18:04.260 --> 01:18:09.020
I definitely get into feeling just defeated.

987
01:18:10.260 --> 01:18:11.660
There's gonna be those times,

988
01:18:11.660 --> 01:18:14.500
but it is so important to proclaim over yourself

989
01:18:16.220 --> 01:18:18.180
every single outcome that you know

990
01:18:18.180 --> 01:18:20.180
that God has promised you.

991
01:18:21.060 --> 01:18:23.580
And that's what you need to do right now.

992
01:18:27.180 --> 01:18:28.020
Okay.

993
01:18:32.140 --> 01:18:35.580
I'm just gonna have to figure out how to get

994
01:18:35.580 --> 01:18:38.460
to that point of victory.

995
01:18:39.980 --> 01:18:44.300
There's definitely, yeah, definitely has me foggy

996
01:18:44.300 --> 01:18:46.180
and exhausted and...

997
01:18:47.180 --> 01:18:50.540
And you're tired, understandably so.

998
01:18:51.420 --> 01:18:53.780
But I'm not gonna speak to that

999
01:18:53.780 --> 01:18:55.220
because that's not gonna serve you

1000
01:18:55.220 --> 01:18:57.380
and that's not who you truly are

1001
01:18:57.380 --> 01:18:59.020
and that's not gonna serve you.

1002
01:18:59.020 --> 01:19:00.500
So it starts with your mouth

1003
01:19:01.700 --> 01:19:03.380
and it starts with what comes out of your mouth

1004
01:19:03.380 --> 01:19:05.580
just like we started this call.

1005
01:19:05.580 --> 01:19:07.940
And so once we get off this call,

1006
01:19:07.940 --> 01:19:12.940
I wanna pray for Joe, Leslie, I wanna pray over you

1007
01:19:13.300 --> 01:19:15.060
because you're clearly being attacked

1008
01:19:15.060 --> 01:19:16.740
and your heart is being attacked

1009
01:19:18.500 --> 01:19:21.060
and you start speaking with your mouth,

1010
01:19:21.060 --> 01:19:23.420
even if you're exhausted and don't believe it,

1011
01:19:23.420 --> 01:19:25.580
it starts with your mouth.

1012
01:19:28.460 --> 01:19:31.260
Okay, I'm gonna take some of these prayer things down

1013
01:19:31.260 --> 01:19:33.620
that Angela put in here too.

1014
01:19:35.300 --> 01:19:36.860
And I'm not coming down on you,

1015
01:19:36.860 --> 01:19:39.540
I'm just telling you from experience.

1016
01:19:40.540 --> 01:19:42.540
Yeah, it's just been very,

1017
01:19:50.980 --> 01:19:52.380
like even just questioning,

1018
01:19:52.380 --> 01:19:54.220
like, did I do the right thing?

1019
01:19:54.220 --> 01:19:57.940
Like financially, this is a huge,

1020
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:05.280
um, financial thing for us. Um,

1021
01:20:09.360 --> 01:20:15.280
In the time when you should be celebrating your, the marriage of, of your daughter, right? Is it

1022
01:20:15.280 --> 01:20:21.520
your daughter? Yeah. The marriage to two marriages. Yeah. We just had one in September and we're

1023
01:20:21.520 --> 01:20:27.440
having another one in April. Think about that. That's such a beautiful thing that they found

1024
01:20:28.400 --> 01:20:33.280
life partners, right? Isn't that a beautiful thing? And the time that you should be celebrating

1025
01:20:33.280 --> 01:20:40.560
one of the happiest times of life, you're distracted with all this craziness going on

1026
01:20:40.560 --> 01:20:54.160
around you. Why start asking why we ask God the right questions. We get answers.

1027
01:20:54.160 --> 01:20:58.480
This is the time where you should be celebrating.

1028
01:21:01.760 --> 01:21:05.680
Why is he attacking you financially right now? Because he knows

1029
01:21:05.680 --> 01:21:08.720
that that's going to stress you out. It's going to bring you to your knees.

1030
01:21:13.200 --> 01:21:17.120
You are, he has created us to be so much more powerful

1031
01:21:18.000 --> 01:21:25.600
than we ever, ever can imagine because we've been so programmed to think that we can't make

1032
01:21:25.600 --> 01:21:32.880
a difference in this physical reality that we see around us. We have been so programmed to think

1033
01:21:32.880 --> 01:21:40.240
that we are not perfectly made and not God's creation. We have been so conditioned, even as

1034
01:21:41.200 --> 01:21:45.360
Christians. And some of you have been Christians way longer than me,

1035
01:21:47.280 --> 01:21:51.840
but even as Christians, we are still so conditioned to that old way of being.

1036
01:21:52.720 --> 01:21:56.480
We don't believe that if we speak over ourselves, we speak life,

1037
01:21:56.480 --> 01:21:59.200
some of those scriptures, we have a tough time believing.

1038
01:21:59.200 --> 01:22:03.120
It's true.

1039
01:22:06.400 --> 01:22:12.400
Because even in the things that I think that I should be sharing, I don't feel like I'm

1040
01:22:14.000 --> 01:22:22.880
good enough to share them for whatever reason. And I feel like God's place them on my heart.

1041
01:22:22.880 --> 01:22:28.720
I've had confirmation from other people. That's what I should be speaking on,

1042
01:22:28.720 --> 01:22:35.280
but it's still, as I do it, I'm like, am I even good enough to press send on this

1043
01:22:35.280 --> 01:22:42.240
social media posts or press send on this email? Or like, am I, am I the right person?

1044
01:22:42.800 --> 01:22:46.560
And you don't speak it. And then Ray one day said,

1045
01:22:47.840 --> 01:22:54.160
you're always two steps ahead of somebody else. So even if you're not fully in that spot yet,

1046
01:22:54.160 --> 01:22:59.120
like you're still two steps ahead of somebody else that's behind you that can learn from you.

1047
01:22:59.680 --> 01:23:03.040
And then, you know, somebody else may be two steps ahead of you and then you're learning from them.

1048
01:23:04.080 --> 01:23:13.040
And, and I believe that, but for, and, and I feel like I'm on that brink of like

1049
01:23:14.240 --> 01:23:18.880
opening a lot of doors, but they're not, like, I can't figure out how to get them

1050
01:23:19.520 --> 01:23:26.160
open, but maybe it's just that I've been so preoccupied with all the noise around me.

1051
01:23:26.800 --> 01:23:31.440
You think so, which I didn't even like it really never even

1052
01:23:34.240 --> 01:23:39.600
didn't tell me until we started talking, but all that was noise.

1053
01:23:41.360 --> 01:23:46.160
You think, and I tell my kids all the time, I'm like, stop listening to all the noise around you,

1054
01:23:46.160 --> 01:23:53.280
like just focus and just do it. Like sometimes we have to take our own advice.

1055
01:23:57.680 --> 01:24:02.480
So thank you. Cause I hadn't even like really verbalized it to anybody.

1056
01:24:03.840 --> 01:24:08.640
You're welcome. And that's why we don't speak it.

1057
01:24:09.600 --> 01:24:17.120
The power death in life is in the power of the tongue. Right. That's is it have to do with the

1058
01:24:17.120 --> 01:24:21.120
sound vibration that comes out of our mouth? I don't know. Maybe, I don't know the science

1059
01:24:21.120 --> 01:24:26.240
behind it. God does. But what I believe is that it has to do with what you just said,

1060
01:24:26.240 --> 01:24:34.000
because if I speak it, I might not believe it's real. And that means I'm a fraud.

1061
01:24:34.080 --> 01:24:39.280
And that means I'm a fraud, but when you speak it,

1062
01:24:44.080 --> 01:24:50.640
you then internalize it. You've spoken it out. You've spoken it out. You then internalize it.

1063
01:24:51.600 --> 01:24:55.200
And the more that you speak it, the more that you declare it, the more that you declare it

1064
01:24:55.200 --> 01:24:59.840
over your family, the more that you speak it positively, the more you internalize.

1065
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:09.520
it and, and things start to change internally, which in turn change externally. I can't stress

1066
01:25:09.520 --> 01:25:15.760
enough to everybody how important this is. It is so important and we have been so conditioned to

1067
01:25:15.760 --> 01:25:21.200
believe that it is not, that it is just some foo-foo thing that, that, you know, life coaches

1068
01:25:21.200 --> 01:25:26.640
say to get us out of a mess that we're in or to make us feel positivity. It's not that.

1069
01:25:26.800 --> 01:25:34.080
The power of proclamation is so key in your life.

1070
01:25:37.200 --> 01:25:41.520
And I know you are on the brink of something really, really big, really, really big.

1071
01:25:44.800 --> 01:25:50.160
And so I'm, I'm definitely going to pray over you. I know this whole group is after we exit here

1072
01:25:50.160 --> 01:25:57.040
today. And I just want you to really, really grasp that power of proclamation today,

1073
01:25:58.320 --> 01:26:02.240
because you will, you are going to walk out of this perfectly healthy.

1074
01:26:03.520 --> 01:26:07.600
You're going to walk out of this perfectly healthy. Your son is going to get through

1075
01:26:07.600 --> 01:26:13.120
the surgery and he is going to come out fantastic. Your daughter's weddings.

1076
01:26:13.120 --> 01:26:17.520
While you already had one, but the one coming up is going to be a huge celebration,

1077
01:26:17.520 --> 01:26:21.280
the best celebration of your life. Your family's going to get together. They're

1078
01:26:21.280 --> 01:26:24.880
going to have a great time. And God is going to show up in your finances.

1079
01:26:26.720 --> 01:26:30.720
So unexpectedly that you are going to be praising his name all day.

1080
01:26:35.440 --> 01:26:38.240
How many times a day do we tell ourselves things like that?

1081
01:26:39.280 --> 01:26:41.760
How many times a day have you told yourself things like that?

1082
01:26:42.640 --> 01:26:46.480
In the last few weeks, often, not often, maybe not at all.

1083
01:26:51.040 --> 01:26:54.960
Yeah. But that's going to stop.

1084
01:26:56.960 --> 01:27:02.560
Maybe not completely probably won't, but you're going to change that.

1085
01:27:05.760 --> 01:27:09.440
I believe that for you. I do. I fully wholeheartedly believe that for you

1086
01:27:10.400 --> 01:27:15.600
because I know the power that we hold and that we wield believe the scriptures.

1087
01:27:17.760 --> 01:27:21.120
I've seen way too much evidence to not believe the scriptures,

1088
01:27:21.760 --> 01:27:30.800
believe the scriptures that you put behind your proclamations, believe them wholeheartedly.

1089
01:27:30.800 --> 01:27:35.360
And you'll see the difference show up in your life. I promise you, I promise you.

1090
01:27:35.360 --> 01:27:36.960
And I don't make empty promises.

1091
01:27:40.320 --> 01:27:41.360
Well, thank you.

1092
01:27:41.360 --> 01:27:45.520
You're welcome. And thank you for sharing that. I know that was a lot. I know we went over. Thank

1093
01:27:45.520 --> 01:27:50.640
you for those of you who stayed. I, I just felt like that was really, really important.

1094
01:27:51.440 --> 01:27:52.960
And I want you to reach out to Ray.

1095
01:27:54.880 --> 01:27:55.380
I will.

1096
01:27:56.080 --> 01:28:00.240
He does not care that you didn't answer him right away. I have the time. I never answer him.

1097
01:28:00.800 --> 01:28:09.760
I'm just kidding, but I'll pray for your migraine today.

1098
01:28:10.880 --> 01:28:14.560
I actually feel okay right now. I was really, really foggy at first, but

1099
01:28:15.440 --> 01:28:18.240
I feel like the fog is lifting. So that's good.

1100
01:28:18.800 --> 01:28:24.720
Yeah. Good, good, good, great, great way to speak it. The fog is lifting and you are so clear.

1101
01:28:26.880 --> 01:28:29.520
I love you guys so much. Thank you for saying.

1102
01:28:31.040 --> 01:28:37.360
And thank you all for sharing and being vulnerable and allowing me to metal in your life.

1103
01:28:38.240 --> 01:28:42.000
Cause you know, you're allowing that and I really appreciate it.

1104
01:28:42.800 --> 01:28:46.560
And I don't take it lightly. And I think we've all helped each other today.

1105
01:28:49.040 --> 01:28:52.720
I hope that you have an incredible Wednesday. I know that you will,

1106
01:28:52.720 --> 01:28:56.240
we're speaking that out, that there's going to be incredible supernatural

1107
01:28:56.480 --> 01:29:03.120
Godly provision that comes down today in whatever way that you need it. And as we exit today,

1108
01:29:03.120 --> 01:29:10.080
please pray for Joe Angela's son. Please, please pray over Leslie and that we cast out any

1109
01:29:10.080 --> 01:29:16.560
spiritual attacks on her. And, and please pray over Sarah and her health and her family's health

1110
01:29:16.560 --> 01:29:21.200
and pray over her finances. Thank you all so much. Thank you guys. Thank you.