WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.080
Alright, so today I want to talk to us a little bit about making your leadership prophetic.

2
00:00:08.080 --> 00:00:12.040
And I want to share some of the best practices that I've learned doing this.

3
00:00:12.040 --> 00:00:18.120
You know, for me, this has been such a big deal because I've gone through this process

4
00:00:18.120 --> 00:00:23.840
of always feeling the conflict between, well, these are best leadership and business practices

5
00:00:23.840 --> 00:00:29.960
and yet there's the spiritual stuff, which basically amounts to be kind, don't fire anyone

6
00:00:29.960 --> 00:00:34.280
and don't say harsh words, you know, so of course I exaggerate.

7
00:00:34.280 --> 00:00:39.680
But what I found is that many Christian leaders, especially those in ministry, I found are

8
00:00:39.680 --> 00:00:45.280
very hesitant to have hard conversations because there's no framework for that.

9
00:00:45.280 --> 00:00:49.880
There's no clear framework on, you know, what does that actually mean?

10
00:00:49.880 --> 00:00:52.000
How do I, how do I do that?

11
00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.360
How do I, you know, what are the boundaries of this?

12
00:00:56.360 --> 00:01:01.320
So I want to talk about two elements of making your leadership prophetic.

13
00:01:01.320 --> 00:01:05.760
So by prophetic, it means it starts in God's heart and works outward.

14
00:01:05.760 --> 00:01:07.680
So let's give a definition to that.

15
00:01:07.680 --> 00:01:12.280
So what we're saying is, what if our leadership is informed from our yoke, our partnership

16
00:01:12.280 --> 00:01:17.360
with the Lord, because we start with His heart and then we speak to other people's hearts,

17
00:01:17.360 --> 00:01:18.360
then their heads.

18
00:01:18.360 --> 00:01:25.040
You know, if you speak to people's heads, what happens is they will, because a lot of,

19
00:01:25.040 --> 00:01:31.160
I think what, what causes most believers to get stuck is this simple idea.

20
00:01:31.160 --> 00:01:35.600
They try to think through things to figure out what they should believe.

21
00:01:35.600 --> 00:01:37.520
But you're not wired that way, right?

22
00:01:37.520 --> 00:01:42.240
Your spirit man, your upstairs you has faculties and capabilities.

23
00:01:42.240 --> 00:01:43.940
One of them is the ability to believe.

24
00:01:43.940 --> 00:01:47.760
So when your heart, which I'm not talking about your emotions, when I say your heart,

25
00:01:47.760 --> 00:01:52.560
I'm talking about your spirit man, your spirit person, the real eternal you that was born

26
00:01:52.560 --> 00:01:55.280
again by the Spirit of God when you got saved.

27
00:01:55.280 --> 00:02:03.120
That you, that new you, when you tell your, when your mind knows what your heart believes,

28
00:02:03.120 --> 00:02:04.600
your mind knows how to work.

29
00:02:04.600 --> 00:02:06.000
It sets your mind free.

30
00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:07.320
Oh, we believe that?

31
00:02:07.320 --> 00:02:09.000
Oh, well in that case, what does this mean?

32
00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:10.000
How do we do that?

33
00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:11.280
How do we implement that?

34
00:02:11.280 --> 00:02:15.120
Just like we do when you think about, you know, when you're waiting on the Lord and

35
00:02:15.120 --> 00:02:19.320
you get a word and then you turn it into a plan, that mapping process, your mind can

36
00:02:19.320 --> 00:02:21.760
serve you best when it knows what your heart believes.

37
00:02:21.760 --> 00:02:22.920
You see this with Mary.

38
00:02:22.920 --> 00:02:29.880
In Luke 1, Mary says she pondered in her heart, sorry, she treasured in her heart and pondered

39
00:02:29.880 --> 00:02:32.400
in her mind, in that order.

40
00:02:32.400 --> 00:02:33.400
Beautiful.

41
00:02:33.400 --> 00:02:38.440
And so what we're learning there is Mary didn't ponder in her mind to figure out what she

42
00:02:38.440 --> 00:02:40.000
should treasure.

43
00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:43.360
She treasured first and then pondered.

44
00:02:43.360 --> 00:02:45.600
So what happens is, I think your IQ goes up.

45
00:02:45.600 --> 00:02:51.240
I think you go into a whole new level of brilliance and execution, even if you're the only believer

46
00:02:51.240 --> 00:02:53.680
in the organization, it doesn't matter.

47
00:02:53.680 --> 00:02:57.560
Because what you're doing is you're functioning now, not as a Christian, you're functioning

48
00:02:57.560 --> 00:03:00.480
as a Kingdom person in fellowship with God.

49
00:03:00.480 --> 00:03:04.000
And what I meant by not as a Christian is, it's not just Christian ethics.

50
00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:08.000
Well, be nice, be kind, don't steal, pay your taxes.

51
00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:09.280
You know, I'm not talking about that stuff.

52
00:03:09.280 --> 00:03:15.360
I'm talking about how does the Kingdom invade with God's goodness in His heart, partner

53
00:03:15.360 --> 00:03:18.000
with you to bring goodness to everyone around you.

54
00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:21.800
Well part of bringing that goodness is learning these two things.

55
00:03:21.800 --> 00:03:24.880
One, calling your team up.

56
00:03:24.880 --> 00:03:28.000
And two, celebrating heroes.

57
00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:32.040
These are two of the most powerful things, but I want to get really practical about them.

58
00:03:32.040 --> 00:03:37.320
So when you talk about calling your team up, you know, you can call people out, but when

59
00:03:37.320 --> 00:03:40.720
you call them up, that's when they change.

60
00:03:40.720 --> 00:03:45.400
And I've found that to the extent you call them out, that's the extent you can call them

61
00:03:45.400 --> 00:03:46.400
up.

62
00:03:46.400 --> 00:03:49.360
But if you just call them up, oh, you're more than that, you're great, don't worry about

63
00:03:49.360 --> 00:03:52.360
it, then what happens is there's no change.

64
00:03:52.360 --> 00:03:57.960
So you have to call them out to say, this is not you, and then say, this is you.

65
00:03:57.960 --> 00:04:02.240
So one of the greatest gifts you can give someone is to call them up.

66
00:04:02.240 --> 00:04:04.760
Look, only love does that, right?

67
00:04:04.760 --> 00:04:06.560
It's easy to not do that.

68
00:04:06.560 --> 00:04:10.720
It's easier to ignore the problem, to just live with it.

69
00:04:10.720 --> 00:04:15.360
Working around them is not a loving thing to do.

70
00:04:15.400 --> 00:04:19.519
Having the hard conversation is not what good leaders do, and it's certainly not what kingdom

71
00:04:19.519 --> 00:04:21.040
leaders do.

72
00:04:21.040 --> 00:04:25.360
So it's not kind to do it as a parent, and it's not kind to do it as a leader.

73
00:04:25.360 --> 00:04:30.000
I can tell you, when we were doing a lot of parenting stuff, the number of times we said

74
00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:34.240
to parents, if you do not correct this in your child now, which will take a little bit

75
00:04:34.240 --> 00:04:40.080
of pain, the world will correct it later on, and it will take a lot more pain.

76
00:04:40.080 --> 00:04:44.880
So the issue, it's the same, you know, parenting and leadership have a lot in common, right?

77
00:04:44.880 --> 00:04:47.400
So here are some questions I want to ask you.

78
00:04:47.400 --> 00:04:53.440
Is there someone in your team, think of a name, if you need to, someone in your team

79
00:04:53.440 --> 00:04:58.720
that you've been doing one of three things, avoiding the hard conversation, working around

80
00:04:58.720 --> 00:05:00.120
them, or

81
00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:02.160
or letting things slide a bit too long?

82
00:05:03.360 --> 00:05:04.360
Think about that for a second.

83
00:05:04.360 --> 00:05:06.240
If you do, why don't you write down a name?

84
00:05:06.240 --> 00:05:07.960
That would be really helpful.

85
00:05:07.960 --> 00:05:10.080
So, is there someone in your team

86
00:05:10.080 --> 00:05:13.280
where you've been avoiding the hard conversation,

87
00:05:13.280 --> 00:05:15.920
either working around them, you know what I mean by that,

88
00:05:15.920 --> 00:05:18.920
just, we'll just not invite them to the meeting

89
00:05:18.920 --> 00:05:21.760
or accommodate them or just let them have their say

90
00:05:21.760 --> 00:05:23.640
and then do something else,

91
00:05:23.640 --> 00:05:26.600
working around them, which is not loving,

92
00:05:26.600 --> 00:05:28.360
or just letting things slide a bit too long?

93
00:05:28.360 --> 00:05:31.160
Look, every one of us as leaders at some point do this.

94
00:05:31.160 --> 00:05:33.600
Even when you know this, you do this, right?

95
00:05:33.600 --> 00:05:34.720
We all do this.

96
00:05:34.720 --> 00:05:37.960
And so, here's the thing.

97
00:05:37.960 --> 00:05:40.800
If you have been doing one of those three things,

98
00:05:40.800 --> 00:05:44.160
then the question is, when is it time to call them up?

99
00:05:44.160 --> 00:05:45.280
Here are two guidelines.

100
00:05:45.280 --> 00:05:48.040
One, when it's disruptive to the team,

101
00:05:48.040 --> 00:05:52.560
or two, it's disruptive to them, right?

102
00:05:52.560 --> 00:05:54.880
So, if you've got that name,

103
00:05:54.880 --> 00:05:57.360
the question is, is this disrupting the team

104
00:05:57.360 --> 00:05:59.680
or is this actually holding them back

105
00:05:59.680 --> 00:06:01.000
in their own growth and development?

106
00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:03.920
If that is it, that is your flag,

107
00:06:03.920 --> 00:06:06.240
your red flag, time to move.

108
00:06:06.240 --> 00:06:09.200
So, here's practically how you do that.

109
00:06:09.200 --> 00:06:12.240
Number one, create self-awareness.

110
00:06:12.240 --> 00:06:15.000
I start these sentences, when I sit down with them,

111
00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:18.640
don't get into a different emotional conversation

112
00:06:18.640 --> 00:06:21.120
that you can't now transition into this conversation.

113
00:06:21.120 --> 00:06:22.040
You know what I mean.

114
00:06:22.040 --> 00:06:25.200
It got so nice that you didn't know how to bring this up now

115
00:06:25.200 --> 00:06:26.440
because it's all weird.

116
00:06:26.440 --> 00:06:29.440
So, I start with, are you aware?

117
00:06:30.520 --> 00:06:31.480
And then I say it,

118
00:06:31.480 --> 00:06:35.160
and then I give them one very specific example.

119
00:06:35.160 --> 00:06:37.720
Are you aware that in meetings you do this?

120
00:06:37.720 --> 00:06:42.120
In fact, on Tuesday, you talked over everyone in the room,

121
00:06:42.120 --> 00:06:43.960
whatever the thing might be, right?

122
00:06:43.960 --> 00:06:45.080
So, are you aware?

123
00:06:45.080 --> 00:06:47.080
And then say what the thing is.

124
00:06:47.080 --> 00:06:49.280
Then I say, because they need an out,

125
00:06:50.160 --> 00:06:54.080
you did not represent yourself well when you did that.

126
00:06:54.960 --> 00:06:56.280
That's useful language

127
00:06:56.280 --> 00:06:58.960
because what you're immediately passing on

128
00:06:58.960 --> 00:07:01.880
is that you have a higher opinion of them.

129
00:07:01.880 --> 00:07:04.160
So, remember the Kruger-Dunning effect.

130
00:07:04.160 --> 00:07:05.400
To remind you again,

131
00:07:05.400 --> 00:07:08.200
the Kruger-Dunning effect is something we all do.

132
00:07:08.200 --> 00:07:09.840
And the Kruger-Dunning effect

133
00:07:09.840 --> 00:07:12.400
is that because you have a weakness in an area,

134
00:07:12.400 --> 00:07:13.880
you cannot see your weakness,

135
00:07:13.880 --> 00:07:16.800
that's why it's your weakness, right?

136
00:07:16.800 --> 00:07:20.360
Which means you cannot recognize competence in that area

137
00:07:20.360 --> 00:07:22.600
because it's your weakness, you cannot see.

138
00:07:22.600 --> 00:07:25.680
So, you ask this person in your team,

139
00:07:25.680 --> 00:07:27.320
if you ask them on a scale of one to 10,

140
00:07:27.320 --> 00:07:29.000
and they go, I'm a solid nine,

141
00:07:29.000 --> 00:07:30.120
and you go, yeah,

142
00:07:30.120 --> 00:07:33.360
but the problem is the scale's out of 100,

143
00:07:33.360 --> 00:07:36.120
and you are a solid nine, this is true.

144
00:07:36.120 --> 00:07:38.720
So, the problem is they can't see the scale, right?

145
00:07:38.720 --> 00:07:40.840
Because their inability,

146
00:07:40.840 --> 00:07:44.120
so here's the net net of the Kruger-Dunning effect.

147
00:07:44.120 --> 00:07:47.000
People overrate their weaknesses

148
00:07:47.000 --> 00:07:49.400
and underrate their strengths.

149
00:07:49.400 --> 00:07:50.440
Oh, I don't know really,

150
00:07:50.440 --> 00:07:51.480
you see professors with this,

151
00:07:51.480 --> 00:07:53.040
oh, I don't really have much to say,

152
00:07:53.040 --> 00:07:55.160
or people who are just deep thinkers,

153
00:07:55.160 --> 00:07:57.520
but always get kinda quiet in the background

154
00:07:57.520 --> 00:07:59.480
that you have to draw in.

155
00:07:59.480 --> 00:08:02.200
They're like, oh, I don't know if I can do that,

156
00:08:02.200 --> 00:08:03.720
because they underrate their,

157
00:08:03.720 --> 00:08:06.640
so that's the inverse Kruger-Dunning effect.

158
00:08:06.640 --> 00:08:08.840
Either way, here's three things you need

159
00:08:08.840 --> 00:08:09.680
when you're doing this,

160
00:08:09.680 --> 00:08:10.680
three things you wanna do.

161
00:08:10.680 --> 00:08:14.880
One, show them you have a higher opinion of them.

162
00:08:14.880 --> 00:08:17.760
That's what makes your leadership prophetic, right?

163
00:08:17.760 --> 00:08:19.400
This is where you go to the Lord

164
00:08:19.400 --> 00:08:23.240
and you can ask him three questions to help with that.

165
00:08:23.240 --> 00:08:26.000
Father, when you look through my eyes,

166
00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:27.520
how do you see them?

167
00:08:27.520 --> 00:08:28.360
This is so useful.

168
00:08:28.360 --> 00:08:29.480
And you say, well, they're not believers.

169
00:08:29.480 --> 00:08:31.000
That doesn't make any difference.

170
00:08:31.000 --> 00:08:32.360
He sees them, right?

171
00:08:32.360 --> 00:08:33.520
Of course he does.

172
00:08:33.520 --> 00:08:38.520
Two, what tone would you use to help them the most?

173
00:08:39.480 --> 00:08:44.480
And three, is there a key you wanna give me

174
00:08:44.640 --> 00:08:45.480
in talking to them?

175
00:08:45.480 --> 00:08:48.400
So, Father, when you look through my eyes,

176
00:08:48.400 --> 00:08:49.360
how do you see them?

177
00:08:49.360 --> 00:08:52.360
Two, what tone would you use to help them the most?

178
00:08:52.360 --> 00:08:54.160
And three, is there a key?

179
00:08:54.160 --> 00:08:56.040
You say, well, it's gonna be a gentle tone.

180
00:08:56.040 --> 00:08:59.680
Yeah, it's gentle, but it can also be clear.

181
00:08:59.680 --> 00:09:03.640
It can be, I mean, a disciplined tone

182
00:09:03.640 --> 00:09:05.840
can also be kind if done properly.

183
00:09:05.840 --> 00:09:08.400
So, we're talking about use the tone.

184
00:09:08.400 --> 00:09:10.800
So, what is it I'm gonna say, use the tone?

185
00:09:10.800 --> 00:09:12.320
So, I said there were three things to do this.

186
00:09:12.320 --> 00:09:13.960
One, higher opinion of them,

187
00:09:13.960 --> 00:09:15.360
ask the Lord the three questions.

188
00:09:15.360 --> 00:09:18.200
Two, get their agreement.

189
00:09:18.880 --> 00:09:20.520
I think you're better than that.

190
00:09:20.520 --> 00:09:21.720
Don't you agree?

191
00:09:21.720 --> 00:09:24.200
Hey, John, I think you're better than that.

192
00:09:24.200 --> 00:09:25.240
Don't you agree?

193
00:09:26.080 --> 00:09:29.040
And I don't think that's who you are.

194
00:09:29.040 --> 00:09:32.480
Agreed, you're waiting for the agreement

195
00:09:32.480 --> 00:09:36.040
to put that self to the side

196
00:09:36.040 --> 00:09:38.160
and let them step into someone new.

197
00:09:38.160 --> 00:09:42.800
And then three, give them someone to be, right?

198
00:09:42.800 --> 00:09:47.440
Hey, who would you like to be in a situation like that?

199
00:09:47.440 --> 00:09:49.480
Remember that example I just gave you

200
00:09:49.480 --> 00:09:52.880
of what you did on Tuesday in the meeting?

201
00:09:52.880 --> 00:09:55.880
But tell me who would you really like to be in a situation?

202
00:09:55.880 --> 00:09:57.720
Let's discuss what does that look like?

203
00:09:57.720 --> 00:09:59.480
So, did you notice I called them out

204
00:09:59.480 --> 00:10:00.680
and then called them in?

205
00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:05.000
them up and I did those three steps. I showed that I had a higher opinion of them than they

206
00:10:05.000 --> 00:10:10.880
had of themselves. I get their agreement and then I give them someone to be. And we role

207
00:10:10.880 --> 00:10:15.720
play it. Okay, let's test how that would work. Next time we're in a meeting, how would that

208
00:10:15.720 --> 00:10:17.500
work?

209
00:10:17.500 --> 00:10:23.360
This simple exercise is so simple to do, people will love you forever. Because at some point,

210
00:10:23.360 --> 00:10:27.160
even if they're a little annoyed with you at the time, they will recognize that it took

211
00:10:27.160 --> 00:10:32.320
love and care to do that. Because if you didn't care, you wouldn't go through this exercise.

212
00:10:32.320 --> 00:10:36.280
So this is really huge for you to do this.

213
00:10:36.280 --> 00:10:43.280
So remember, at the end, people remember how you made them feel more than what you said.

214
00:10:44.280 --> 00:10:48.920
So making them feel like you have a higher opinion of them, man, they'll be your person

215
00:10:48.920 --> 00:10:55.920
forever. They will love you in return for this loving gesture. Even if you have to be

216
00:10:56.520 --> 00:11:00.920
really to the point. I mean, even in the last week, we did something like this. Jenny and

217
00:11:00.920 --> 00:11:05.040
I had to speak to someone and we had to go through this process. And I started kind and

218
00:11:05.040 --> 00:11:08.840
then I had to get right to it. And when I got right to it, because of the nature of

219
00:11:08.840 --> 00:11:15.360
the person we were talking to, I had to be a little more blunt. And being a little blunt

220
00:11:15.360 --> 00:11:20.360
and saying, that's what it is. And then they talked and then I went back to it two or three

221
00:11:20.360 --> 00:11:25.720
times and I said, but that's not who you are. This is you because I've seen you in meetings

222
00:11:25.720 --> 00:11:30.560
and you pitch up and you do your thing and the whole atmosphere rises because, yay, she's

223
00:11:30.560 --> 00:11:36.200
in the meeting. How cool is that? So I wanted her to know. I remember talking to a pastor,

224
00:11:36.200 --> 00:11:41.920
a senior pastor, and we were working together and I called him out on something and I started

225
00:11:41.920 --> 00:11:46.560
calling him up and he said, man, you're on my case all the time. I said, oh, I'm sorry.

226
00:11:46.560 --> 00:11:51.480
It's clear I have a higher opinion of you than you have of yourself. And he said, how

227
00:11:51.480 --> 00:11:56.800
do you figure that? And I said, because why would I make this suggestion if I didn't

228
00:11:56.800 --> 00:12:02.240
think you were capable of it? Right. If I was asking a five year old to go for driving

229
00:12:02.240 --> 00:12:07.720
lessons, that would be ridiculous. So clearly I have a higher view of your capacity. So

230
00:12:07.720 --> 00:12:11.920
let me tell you why I have a higher view of your capacity, because I've seen you do this.

231
00:12:11.920 --> 00:12:18.920
I've seen you do that. I've seen that situation. So I come prepared with real practical examples.

232
00:12:18.920 --> 00:12:25.720
Right. So the real practical examples, when you speak to someone, the worst thing you

233
00:12:25.720 --> 00:12:31.360
can do is generalize. That is the worst. Do not leave it to the imagination. This is deeply

234
00:12:31.360 --> 00:12:38.120
unkind. Well, you know, you have a tendency to be arrogant. What the heck does that mean?

235
00:12:38.120 --> 00:12:44.440
I don't even know what to do with that. So in that particular structure, you know, I

236
00:12:44.440 --> 00:12:49.880
want to say to you that you have to be precise. On Tuesday, you did this. You know, two weeks

237
00:12:49.880 --> 00:12:54.360
ago we were in that situation. You did that. It's the second time. I like to have two examples,

238
00:12:54.360 --> 00:12:58.680
not three or five. You don't make him feel like they've been analyzed to death. But one

239
00:12:58.680 --> 00:13:03.080
or two clear examples so that if it's just one example, well, that was a one off. I was

240
00:13:03.080 --> 00:13:09.320
having a bad day. Two examples. And so be precise with real examples and don't draw

241
00:13:09.400 --> 00:13:14.440
generalized conclusions. You know, you think you're the only person whose opinions matter

242
00:13:15.160 --> 00:13:19.400
and you came to that conclusion because they always talk over everyone. Well, that may not

243
00:13:19.400 --> 00:13:23.640
be the reason they're talking about everyone. There are lots of reasons that could could cause

244
00:13:23.640 --> 00:13:29.880
that. So don't draw a big, generalized conclusion. Just be extremely specific. Stay with that.

245
00:13:29.880 --> 00:13:33.640
And then when you call them up, you can generalize because I think you're more than that.

246
00:13:34.200 --> 00:13:38.440
I think you just didn't represent yourself well. Right. Because that's how you are agreed.

247
00:13:38.440 --> 00:13:43.160
So you can see how quickly that conversation goes. And this this sets people free faster

248
00:13:43.160 --> 00:13:47.960
than anything I know. All right. While we're on the subject of calling people up, let me just

249
00:13:47.960 --> 00:13:54.040
take a little detour and share a best practice I do for myself, which I'm actually due to do it

250
00:13:54.040 --> 00:13:59.080
again. I haven't done it in a bit. Calling yourself up. So I used to do this exercise

251
00:13:59.080 --> 00:14:04.520
twice a year. I need to go back to this. Isn't this like leadership stuff? Even the guy teaching

252
00:14:04.520 --> 00:14:09.800
it. Right. You go through leadership. Yep. I got to remember. I got to do that. So we never get to

253
00:14:09.800 --> 00:14:15.560
your leadership stuff and say, I know all that. Yeah. But have you become all that or do you do

254
00:14:15.560 --> 00:14:22.440
all this? So here's here's the exercise I like to do. Ask three people to participate. Pick people

255
00:14:22.440 --> 00:14:28.840
who love you enough to speak to you truthfully. Speak people who are different parts of the

256
00:14:28.840 --> 00:14:33.320
business. So if you're the CEO and you have a you know, you have a leadership team or management

257
00:14:33.320 --> 00:14:38.520
team, don't just pick management team people. Pick people at different parts of the business

258
00:14:38.520 --> 00:14:41.800
who are not necessarily your management team. In other words, people who don't.

259
00:14:42.360 --> 00:14:47.160
So I learned some of this from Craig Gruschell. And Craig, you know, I was talking to him one day

260
00:14:47.160 --> 00:14:52.440
and I said, how do you do this? He says he has five people. And he's when he prepares his sermon

261
00:14:52.440 --> 00:14:57.400
each week, he asked these five people. And the first two, you know, one's his assistant. And

262
00:14:57.400 --> 00:14:59.960
the other one, I think, is someone in their team.

263
00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:06.000
Oh, and the other one is the his daughter who's always very blunt with him. I have a daughter like that and so

264
00:15:06.560 --> 00:15:07.920
um

265
00:15:07.920 --> 00:15:12.160
He would sit down with him and he'd share his sermon and he knew that if he asked him, you know, what do you think?

266
00:15:12.320 --> 00:15:18.480
He'd get oh, it's genius. It's wonderful. The clouds parted and craig descended, you know, so he knew that was worthless question

267
00:15:18.640 --> 00:15:22.000
So he learned to ask good questions to figure to get this out of them

268
00:15:22.240 --> 00:15:26.080
So he asked him if you were to make this shorter, what would you cut out?

269
00:15:27.200 --> 00:15:29.200
Clever question then he's cameraman

270
00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:36.640
Who and the other was the janitor who who was like this old boy who just tell him as it is

271
00:15:37.360 --> 00:15:38.080
and uh

272
00:15:38.080 --> 00:15:43.680
So when he preached the sermon you go back to the janitor and the cameraman and say, uh, how did I do?

273
00:15:44.000 --> 00:15:46.400
And the answer was either you you nailed it

274
00:15:46.640 --> 00:15:50.640
We can we can send that to all the campuses because they I think they have 30 something campuses

275
00:15:51.360 --> 00:15:55.760
And or he would say no you have to do that again. You you don't got it

276
00:15:56.400 --> 00:15:57.280
So

277
00:15:57.280 --> 00:16:02.800
It was really useful, but the three questions that helped me the other practical ones you may you can use these or your own

278
00:16:03.840 --> 00:16:09.600
I learned to ask these three questions to these people that i've picked three people three questions first question

279
00:16:09.920 --> 00:16:14.080
What is my biggest contribution to the business? In other words, let me clarify. What do I do? Well

280
00:16:14.640 --> 00:16:16.400
I need to do more of

281
00:16:16.400 --> 00:16:22.320
That shows you how you're being received and what's what what part of your leadership is really helping people

282
00:16:22.880 --> 00:16:23.920
two

283
00:16:23.920 --> 00:16:25.920
What do I need to stop doing?

284
00:16:27.040 --> 00:16:30.160
What where am I involved in the business that I don't need to be

285
00:16:30.720 --> 00:16:33.440
That's why you can see you have to pick three people who are going to tell you the truth

286
00:16:34.320 --> 00:16:36.160
And of course you have to give them

287
00:16:36.160 --> 00:16:41.360
You have to give them a waiver. Nothing you say will affect your bonus or your career or whatever three

288
00:16:41.920 --> 00:16:47.920
How can I improve as a leader clarify like do I have habits mannerisms or ways of dealing with people?

289
00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:50.720
I really need to improve on or areas you think

290
00:16:51.520 --> 00:16:53.520
You know can can do with an upgrade

291
00:16:54.000 --> 00:16:57.760
So what's my biggest contribution to the business? What do I need to stop doing?

292
00:16:58.320 --> 00:16:59.360
and

293
00:16:59.360 --> 00:17:03.760
How can I improve as a leader? All right, so that's all part of the

294
00:17:04.480 --> 00:17:08.160
The first section of calling people and yourself up

295
00:17:09.280 --> 00:17:11.680
the second part I want to share with you briefly is

296
00:17:13.980 --> 00:17:15.980
Celebrating euros

297
00:17:16.319 --> 00:17:19.440
It's one of the easiest ways to drive

298
00:17:20.240 --> 00:17:25.520
Your the culture of your organization to the next level by celebrating the behavior you want

299
00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:30.400
When you see it, you know, the latin is captive only means caught in the act of doing good

300
00:17:31.200 --> 00:17:35.840
And we introduced this when I first learned this we introduced this when we were running our schools

301
00:17:35.840 --> 00:17:38.400
We had a k-8 school many of you know in atlanta

302
00:17:38.800 --> 00:17:41.200
And we became the number one school in georgia

303
00:17:41.200 --> 00:17:45.680
And then we were in the top four percent of all private schools in the united states at the highest testing standard

304
00:17:45.680 --> 00:17:47.760
There are three standards. This was the highest one

305
00:17:48.480 --> 00:17:49.600
and

306
00:17:49.600 --> 00:17:53.440
And and you know, it's it was because it was a very high performing school and all that stuff

307
00:17:53.840 --> 00:17:55.600
But the kids loved it man

308
00:17:55.600 --> 00:18:00.720
We i'd never heard of other schools where the kids cry because they have to go on vacation never heard that before

309
00:18:01.280 --> 00:18:05.680
Or it's friday, you know, and they want to stay there because school was fun

310
00:18:06.640 --> 00:18:10.640
And not every kid and not every friday. I'm just saying it happened on occasion

311
00:18:11.920 --> 00:18:15.840
But here's the thing we learned so what we implemented captive only which was

312
00:18:16.320 --> 00:18:20.960
Caught in the act. So the teachers are on the lookout for people doing cool things we could reward

313
00:18:21.120 --> 00:18:24.400
So on fridays at our chapel meeting we used to call up and say hey

314
00:18:24.800 --> 00:18:29.360
John did this and help, you know kid on the things or share these lunch or she did this or

315
00:18:29.760 --> 00:18:35.520
You know, sally did that and so forth and what we did is we created heroes by celebrating the exact

316
00:18:35.820 --> 00:18:37.820
Reinforcing the exact behavior we want

317
00:18:38.320 --> 00:18:43.280
So making somebody the year of the story we did a whole training of this on on leaderforge

318
00:18:43.360 --> 00:18:49.840
So it goes through it much more specifically, but it's got to go past the trivial nonsense stuff of awesome. Great job

319
00:18:50.080 --> 00:18:56.640
Great, that's just lazy leadership, right? And I know people hate it when I say that but it really is lazy leadership

320
00:18:57.120 --> 00:19:00.720
Because you're just using a generic whatever it has to be detailed

321
00:19:00.800 --> 00:19:03.040
It has to be specific and it you know

322
00:19:03.040 --> 00:19:06.320
So what I like to do is when i'm making somebody the year of the story

323
00:19:06.720 --> 00:19:10.960
I like to tell them i'm going to make you the year of the story. Let's go and do this project together

324
00:19:11.200 --> 00:19:15.840
We're going to make you the year of the story. In fact when we finish we're going to say this about you

325
00:19:17.040 --> 00:19:18.800
I got the idea

326
00:19:18.800 --> 00:19:24.340
From the boston philharmonic orchestra conductor ben zander who wrote the book art of possibility

327
00:19:24.960 --> 00:19:31.120
And is used as now training, you know people all over the world try to hire him found out he costs, you know

328
00:19:31.440 --> 00:19:36.320
I think he's now two hundred fifty thousand dollars for two hours or whatever. So he's super expensive

329
00:19:36.640 --> 00:19:39.360
I don't know what his rates are anymore, but I tried to hire him once

330
00:19:39.600 --> 00:19:44.800
um, but I know that like in switzerland, they'd bring all the cfo's from every the the

331
00:19:45.360 --> 00:19:47.360
finance ministers from every country

332
00:19:47.760 --> 00:19:53.200
Uh in in the g20 and they bring him together and they give him he comes and trains him for a day

333
00:19:53.680 --> 00:19:55.360
That's the guy

334
00:19:55.360 --> 00:19:58.720
And one of the things he invented is this idea of giving everyone an a

335
00:19:59.680 --> 00:20:01.680
and by

336
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:06.280
By giving every, because he had a, he runs a master's program in Boston and for music.

337
00:20:06.280 --> 00:20:10.020
And these are, I mean, these are accomplished musicians.

338
00:20:10.020 --> 00:20:14.680
And what he realized is there was so much stress on these people to, and the performance

339
00:20:14.680 --> 00:20:16.180
and things, and am I going to graduate?

340
00:20:16.180 --> 00:20:21.640
So he started on day one and he said, okay, everybody, everybody gets an A for this class.

341
00:20:21.640 --> 00:20:22.640
So here's what you're going to do.

342
00:20:22.640 --> 00:20:27.280
You're going to write a letter to me and you're going to post date it at the end of the course,

343
00:20:27.280 --> 00:20:28.660
one year from now.

344
00:20:28.660 --> 00:20:34.700
And in that letter, you're going to write why I gave you an A. Think about that.

345
00:20:34.700 --> 00:20:35.740
What did he just do?

346
00:20:35.740 --> 00:20:41.660
He gave them a possibility to live into, not a standard to live up to.

347
00:20:41.660 --> 00:20:43.940
This is so kingdom.

348
00:20:43.940 --> 00:20:45.500
That's what the Lord does with us all the time.

349
00:20:45.500 --> 00:20:47.580
He gives us something to live in, a possibility.

350
00:20:47.580 --> 00:20:50.080
Hey, this is how I see you growing to this.

351
00:20:50.080 --> 00:20:51.080
Not just my standards.

352
00:20:51.080 --> 00:20:54.920
You see, and the old covenant, there was the law, standard to live up to.

353
00:20:54.920 --> 00:20:56.860
In the new covenant, possibility to live into.

354
00:20:56.860 --> 00:20:57.860
Isn't that gorgeous?

355
00:20:57.860 --> 00:20:59.460
I love that.

356
00:20:59.460 --> 00:21:01.380
So here's the bottom line.

357
00:21:01.380 --> 00:21:03.060
True leaders are not heroes.

358
00:21:03.060 --> 00:21:05.340
True leaders create heroes.

359
00:21:05.340 --> 00:21:09.500
You do not have to be the hero to your organization.

360
00:21:09.500 --> 00:21:13.700
You have to be the person that creates heroes in your organization.

361
00:21:13.700 --> 00:21:14.700
Pressure's off, guys.

362
00:21:14.700 --> 00:21:15.700
Pressure's off.

363
00:21:15.700 --> 00:21:20.700
You don't have to be the source of all wisdom and knowledge to your organization.

364
00:21:20.700 --> 00:21:23.580
Great leaders create heroes.

365
00:21:23.580 --> 00:21:26.060
They're not the hero.

366
00:21:26.060 --> 00:21:28.460
So don't be the hero to your team instead.

367
00:21:28.460 --> 00:21:31.020
So look, I know one of the things we want to do.

368
00:21:31.020 --> 00:21:36.740
We want to put controls in place so that our team doesn't make mistakes that we made.

369
00:21:36.740 --> 00:21:37.820
But here's the thing.

370
00:21:37.820 --> 00:21:40.460
Your team are going to make different mistakes.

371
00:21:40.460 --> 00:21:44.500
And if you do not let them make those different mistakes, provided they're not catastrophic

372
00:21:44.500 --> 00:21:48.220
to the business, then they will never learn and grow.

373
00:21:48.220 --> 00:21:55.640
So making someone the hero of the story sends an incredible message that everybody matters.

374
00:21:56.640 --> 00:21:57.640
And little things.

375
00:21:57.640 --> 00:21:59.960
You don't have to wait for them to do something fantastic.

376
00:21:59.960 --> 00:22:01.840
Just pick something, right?

377
00:22:01.840 --> 00:22:03.840
Make them the hero of the story.

378
00:22:03.840 --> 00:22:07.480
We've talked a bit about this before, so I'm not going to spend too much time on it.

379
00:22:07.480 --> 00:22:14.120
But look, in this age of disruption and uncertainty, giving everyone in your team a moment to be

380
00:22:14.120 --> 00:22:22.960
in the spotlight is one of the fastest ways to quietly call them up into the real them,

381
00:22:22.960 --> 00:22:24.620
into pulling them up.

382
00:22:24.620 --> 00:22:29.380
And so when you're talking about making your leadership prophetic, what it means is having

383
00:22:29.380 --> 00:22:33.060
a view of someone that's one step higher than they have of themselves.

384
00:22:33.060 --> 00:22:34.060
Not ten steps.

385
00:22:34.060 --> 00:22:37.340
I mean, you can have ten, but don't talk to it more than one step ahead.

386
00:22:37.340 --> 00:22:40.780
If you do more than one step, it just sounds like you're flattering them.

387
00:22:40.780 --> 00:22:44.960
If you do one step above, oh, I'm a little surprised.

388
00:22:44.960 --> 00:22:46.180
I thought you were this.

389
00:22:46.180 --> 00:22:47.860
And you're always pulling them up.

390
00:22:47.860 --> 00:22:53.460
It's like you're just pulling them up from the ground, you know, just raising them up.

391
00:22:53.460 --> 00:22:55.500
And that's what it means to raise up leaders.

392
00:22:55.500 --> 00:22:57.940
And to do that, it's great to have a chat with the Lord.

393
00:22:57.940 --> 00:22:59.460
Lord, how do you see them?

394
00:22:59.460 --> 00:23:02.380
When you look through my eyes, what do you see?

395
00:23:02.380 --> 00:23:08.100
And it's amazing when people feel seen and feel that you have a higher opinion of them,

396
00:23:08.100 --> 00:23:11.700
you've just given them someone new to be.

397
00:23:11.700 --> 00:23:16.220
And that, for me, is one of the most powerful ways to make your leadership prophetic and

398
00:23:16.220 --> 00:23:17.780
in partnership with the Lord.

399
00:23:17.780 --> 00:23:18.860
So I hope you find that useful.