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Awesome.

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Okay.

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So welcome.

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Good evening.

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I'm Bethany Cooper.

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I'm one of the master hardware coaches in the community.

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I'm so glad to be here with you tonight.

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And to see what God is going to stir in your hearts,

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the breakthroughs that are going to happen and all of the

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transformation that God has in store for all of us,

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myself included.

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God is always giving us upgrades.

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And so thank you for joining us tonight.

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I want to say way to go on investing in your heart work and making

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yourself a priority.

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I'm so glad to be here with you tonight.

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You all it's going to be life-changing.

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The more that you continue to lean into this process and everything

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that God has for you every day.

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No matter what you're facing,

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if you'll just pause every day and just say, Lord,

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what's one thing.

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That you want me to do regarding my heart work today.

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You can breathe.

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You can work on that one thing.

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You can do more than one thing a day,

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but if you're feeling that overwhelm, just kind of focusing on, okay,

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derailed or caught up in that one thing.

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And then keep going.

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And so that's the way to push through overwhelm ladies.

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We can feel it.

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That's real, but we don't want to get derailed because of overwhelm.

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And so when I encourage you, if that is you,

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if you're kind of in the mix of the heart work process and you're

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feeling that,

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that is something that I want to encourage you to partner with.

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You can do more than one thing a day,

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but if you're feeling that overwhelm, just kind of focusing on, okay,

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what's that one thing father today that I can do,

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that's going to help you kind of press through that and not get derailed

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or quit.

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Again, my name is Bethany Cooper. I'm so glad to be here.

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Who is new joining us for the first time tonight.

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This is your first live session. You've never been here before.

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Go ahead and put that in the chat for us.

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We'd love to welcome you and join you for all my sisters that are coming

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back for another round of heart work. Welcome back.

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So glad to have you here again tonight.

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It looks like Canyon is here for the first time and Sharon is here for the

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first time. Love it. Welcome ladies.

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So glad to have you as a part of the last year,

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single community and family God's on the move. You all,

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he's doing something amazing and kingdom families and marriages,

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and he's starting with us. He's starting with us.

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For those of you that have never met me before.

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I'm a success story from the community and net Lewis,

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who's one of our peer coaches in the community as well is also one of our

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success stories.

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And God is doing amazing things and continuing to, you know,

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just teach both of us things in marriage that y'all,

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we couldn't learn when we were single.

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There's all kinds of things that we get stretched and we grow and God is,

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is doing awesome things.

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So I'm going to pass it over to Annette and have her do a couple housekeeping

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things for us and pray us in as well.

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Good evening, ladies. It's so good to be here with you tonight.

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And as Bethany said,

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there's always opportunity to learn and grow no matter where you are in life,

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whether you're married or single. God really wants to work in all of us.

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We often say in the group, hurt in relationship,

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healed in relationship, hurt in community, healed in community.

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And with that being said,

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what we really want you to do is come out of hiding,

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be courageous and step into the group post about what you're going through

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about how we can pray for you, how we can encourage you,

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how we can support you because we want to do everything that we can to

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support the work that Holy spirit's doing in your life.

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So be sure to,

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to take the time each week to just give us a little update about how you're

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doing. That encourages us as well. And like I said,

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gives us the opportunity to encourage you.

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And the other thing that always comes, no matter where you are,

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whether it's in heartwork or in life, just outside of this distractions,

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always come because Satan likes to do nothing more than get us derailed or

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off track.

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But the way that we can come against that is by continuing on persevere,

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continue in the process. Even like Bethany was saying earlier,

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if it's just one thing a day, one thing is progress.

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If you don't do everything that you wanted to do, that's okay.

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If it takes you longer than you think it should take you, that's okay.

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It's all okay.

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What we want you to do and what we pray that you continue to do is despite

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distractions or things that come up,

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that you still show up so that we can support you,

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help you pray for you and just keep navigating and moving forward.

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Okay. So with all that said,

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I'm going to pray us in and we're going to get started and see what God has

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for us tonight. Dear heavenly father.

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Thank you for the privilege and the opportunity to come tonight before you

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together in this community.

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Thank you for the healing of hearts and minds that embodies that you have

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for us tonight. We pray for revealing,

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for healing that things that we maybe haven't grasped before that you would

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have for us tonight.

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We pray that you would open our hearts and our eyes to be able to receive

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those.

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Ask your anointing on Bethany tonight as she.

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speaks your truth out over each one of us, help us to learn and

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grow and to walk more and more each day into our most authentic

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selves. And that we can have the abundant life and fulfill the

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plans and the purposes that you have for us, God. In your name,

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I pray. Amen.

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Amen. Amen. I love that. Thank you so much. And I appreciate

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you praying and going over those ladies super important what

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and that is talking about in that housekeeping. I know those

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are kind of things where sometimes we were like, I can

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miss that. I promise you need to hear it. And that's why we're

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saying it. And so I want to encourage you all on the

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distractions, as she was saying, I just feel led to kind of

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emphasize this a little more. We were chatting about this this

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afternoon. And one of the things when I was going through the

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heartwork in my boot camp, again, that's what we used to

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call it. I can't tell you how many times my spiritual

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daughter's dad who was, you know, recently kind of had

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broken up with him how many times he would literally text

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me when I would be on live sessions like you're on right

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now. And so I want to just say to you, that if you have x's

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popping up, even messaging you during lives, or when you sit

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down to do heartwork, y'all, that's, that's a trap of the

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enemy. Okay, he's trying to lure you away so that you're not

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focusing on your heartwork. And a lot of people will be like, Oh,

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I just met someone awesome. Right after you get in the

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heartwork. Okay, let's just think about that. Okay. Am I

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saying that person isn't awesome? They might be. But if

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you just came into the heartwork and someone pops up, you know, I

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want to encourage you just to say to them, hey, you seem

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really amazing. I just started this really important heartwork

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journey that I need to do I need to invest in this. And you know,

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if you're open to it, I would really enjoy circling back to

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when I'm finished with this and you all putting that in God's

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hands. I promise if that is your spirit mate, he is going to wait

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for you and he's going to honor that process. If he's someone

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that's like, No, let's we got to do this now. And you're like, I

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got to do this now or I'm going to miss out. Y'all that should

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be a signal to you. Right there. That's a signal that you're

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getting way too caught up in fear and panic that you're going

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to miss out on something. You can't miss out on your spirit

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mate. You just can't. Okay. For some of you, you've been single

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for a long time, you've been waiting for marriage. You know,

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the enemy is going to try to come in and lie like it's never

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going to happen. This heartwork is not going to really be

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effective. I mean, he just tries to come in and assault us all

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the time to get us focused off of the Lord and on to his his

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lies and the things that can lead us astray and isolate us

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and cause us to go into withdrawal and all of the

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things. So I'm just trying to reveal some of the tactics of

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the enemy so that you're aware. And hopefully you won't get

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tripped up by them too. Because we have so many ladies that get

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derailed in their heartwork and have to circle back years later.

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Okay, let's, let's stay in the game, stay focused. And remember

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you're worth it. You're worth it. And so is your, your healthy

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marriage. Okay, so stay down in, we're going to go into

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supernatural surrender tonight. But I did want to talk to you

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first about your Jesus cares board. For those of you that

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have just begun, you might be in week one, or you might be

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working on the welcome area. But either way, the Jesus cares

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board video by Jackie is in week one. For ladies that are past

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that you might even want to circle back and just rewatch

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that one video, but I am going to go through it tonight. I feel

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like it's super important to emphasize this in our

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supernatural surrender week. The Jesus cares board, ladies,

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it's all about surrendering your worries, your concerns, the

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things that are burdening you and and ladies, let's get

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specific. Okay, so for instance, it's cool to put a person's name

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on there. But man, let's put what is it that you're asking

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Jesus to take care of in that person's life, in your

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relationship with that person? What is a specific need

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regarding, you know, your health and wellness? Like, what do you

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need specifically Jesus to do in your life? And I have this thing

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actually up on my vision board, I was looking at it today, it

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says, the prayers that are not asked, cannot be answered. And I

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think that's such a good reminder tonight. And so many

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times I think we and again, we're kind of glossing in

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general saying, Jesus, I need this. And it's like this big

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general prayer. And he knows everything we have need of, but

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there's something about us asking him for it, casting those

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cares onto Jesus and, and saying, Jesus, I trust that

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you're going to work in this situation. So I'm going to show

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you, ladies, yours doesn't have to look like any of these. Okay.

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But I am going to show you some examples.

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from my, I think I have mine in here,

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but I have a couple other ladies.

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I did a little different this afternoon

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and just kinda, I had a hard time setting my board

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back where it was.

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So I wanna show you all this.

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Give me one second, I wanna make this a little smaller.

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Okay, so this one, again, y'all can do whatever you want.

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These were little heart post-it notes.

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That was something she wanted to do.

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And these were some things,

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some scriptures that spoke to her,

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some areas that God was really speaking to her.

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Again, would love to encourage y'all to get real specific.

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This one was just a magnetic board.

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She got it and put it on her fridge.

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Maybe that's something that's more doable for you.

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This isn't about the mechanism that you use, ladies, okay?

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It's not about how creative you can get.

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If you wanna be creative, awesome, do that.

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But the goal is for you to get it done,

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to cast your cares and get that stuff off of you

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and onto Jesus.

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So however you can do that, like quickly, effectively,

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and then revisit it as you even go through the hard work,

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because there might be additional things that come up.

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Here's another one.

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She did a heart background and then pink post-its.

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There's a scripture on there that spoke to her.

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Here's another one.

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She put herself on there

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as a reminder that Jesus cares about her.

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I love that.

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You know, so many of all of us need that daily reminder

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that not only does he care about all of our needs,

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but he cares about us.

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And so that gave her that visual reminder every day.

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Here's a push pin board.

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That's something that I used.

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It just made it really easy to kind of pin those up

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real quick.

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And you see here, she's kind of going into some,

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even like anger.

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She needed Jesus to help her with her anger,

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some other areas.

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I also wanted to show this

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because there's these little boxes,

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these red boxes on the bottom here.

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00:11:41.340 --> 00:11:43.740
I really wanna encourage those of you with children.

246
00:11:44.020 --> 00:11:46.020
It doesn't have to be on your board.

247
00:11:46.220 --> 00:11:48.320
They can have their own board, okay?

248
00:11:48.320 --> 00:11:51.140
But to encourage your children

249
00:11:51.140 --> 00:11:53.460
to create their own Jesus cares board.

250
00:11:54.020 --> 00:11:56.680
Even little children can start to understand

251
00:11:56.960 --> 00:11:59.520
what it means to cast a care on Jesus.

252
00:11:59.960 --> 00:12:02.000
And so these little red boxes,

253
00:12:02.600 --> 00:12:04.740
this woman was a single mama

254
00:12:05.220 --> 00:12:08.500
and her kid was old enough to read her board.

255
00:12:08.620 --> 00:12:10.360
And she had some private things

256
00:12:10.360 --> 00:12:12.140
that she wanted to cast onto Jesus.

257
00:12:12.320 --> 00:12:15.940
And so she created those boxes and put them inside of there,

258
00:12:15.940 --> 00:12:19.620
but she knows what those represent, excuse me.

259
00:12:20.040 --> 00:12:22.860
And so maybe that's something that you might need to do

260
00:12:22.860 --> 00:12:24.700
if you have kids and you're worried about that.

261
00:12:24.720 --> 00:12:27.040
And so you haven't been putting a certain need on your board

262
00:12:27.120 --> 00:12:29.240
that really is a burden to you.

263
00:12:29.300 --> 00:12:31.540
This is one way, you don't have to do it this way,

264
00:12:31.560 --> 00:12:33.060
but this is just a recommendation.

265
00:12:33.160 --> 00:12:35.500
Y'all, you literally could pin it and close it.

266
00:12:35.760 --> 00:12:37.500
It doesn't have to even be a little box,

267
00:12:37.580 --> 00:12:39.320
but I just want y'all to know and see.

268
00:12:39.600 --> 00:12:43.260
This lady had windows on a door and she just used that.

269
00:12:43.840 --> 00:12:46.940
Again, I'm trying to show you how doable this is.

270
00:12:47.160 --> 00:12:49.280
For her, she used different color post-its

271
00:12:49.280 --> 00:12:50.980
for different categories.

272
00:12:51.640 --> 00:12:53.160
Again, y'all do whatever you want.

273
00:12:53.260 --> 00:12:54.240
This is your thing.

274
00:12:54.740 --> 00:12:55.680
Here's another one.

275
00:12:55.720 --> 00:12:57.040
I'm gonna kind of start going through these.

276
00:12:57.140 --> 00:12:58.260
Okay, that's my last one.

277
00:12:58.440 --> 00:13:00.020
Oh, I didn't put mine in there.

278
00:13:00.120 --> 00:13:00.680
That's all right.

279
00:13:01.020 --> 00:13:03.540
So the reason I was gonna show you mine

280
00:13:03.540 --> 00:13:05.540
is that when I went through the heart work,

281
00:13:05.720 --> 00:13:07.260
it was one way, it's a different,

282
00:13:07.580 --> 00:13:09.320
like not everything is off there,

283
00:13:09.320 --> 00:13:13.880
but a lot of them are off of my board now.

284
00:13:14.180 --> 00:13:16.680
I also, I'm gonna unblur my screen

285
00:13:16.680 --> 00:13:17.860
because I wanna show y'all something,

286
00:13:18.220 --> 00:13:19.160
but mine has changed.

287
00:13:19.520 --> 00:13:22.780
So I update mine kind of on a regular basis.

288
00:13:23.120 --> 00:13:25.100
I don't know if y'all can see that little,

289
00:13:25.340 --> 00:13:27.420
where I'm pointing, it's like right above my finger there,

290
00:13:27.420 --> 00:13:30.100
and it looks like little blue and pink post-it notes.

291
00:13:30.440 --> 00:13:33.980
So what I started doing was putting my answered prayers

292
00:13:33.980 --> 00:13:36.260
on a piece of paper and I pinned it to this board

293
00:13:36.260 --> 00:13:39.180
that's behind me that I can look at on a regular basis

294
00:13:39.180 --> 00:13:42.620
to remind myself that Jesus cares.

295
00:13:43.380 --> 00:13:45.780
God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit are working in my life.

296
00:13:46.000 --> 00:13:48.960
They're answering prayers that I've specifically asked for.

297
00:13:49.060 --> 00:13:52.620
And that just fuels my faith to believe for more of that,

298
00:13:53.300 --> 00:13:55.040
that God will do it again in my life

299
00:13:55.040 --> 00:13:56.480
and he's gonna do it again in yours.

300
00:13:56.540 --> 00:14:00.120
So I want y'all to also reflect on areas of your life

301
00:14:00.120 --> 00:14:02.940
where God has already answered prayers

302
00:14:02.940 --> 00:14:06.000
so that that can build your faith

303
00:14:06.000 --> 00:14:08.140
for what he's going to do in the days ahead.

304
00:14:08.640 --> 00:14:11.420
And remember, sometimes he doesn't answer our prayers,

305
00:14:11.500 --> 00:14:12.600
but praise the Lord he doesn't

306
00:14:12.600 --> 00:14:14.700
because they're not actually good for us.

307
00:14:15.320 --> 00:14:18.280
All right, so keep that in mind as you keep moving forward.

308
00:14:18.380 --> 00:14:21.320
Okay, so let's go into the supernatural surrender.

309
00:14:21.760 --> 00:14:23.840
Ladies, I want you to think about,

310
00:14:25.360 --> 00:14:27.520
I'm gonna share a song with you here in a minute.

311
00:14:27.560 --> 00:14:28.940
I'm not gonna play the whole thing,

312
00:14:29.000 --> 00:14:31.220
but I do feel led tonight to play part of it.

313
00:14:31.220 --> 00:14:34.500
I don't normally do this, but I was getting ready tonight

314
00:14:34.500 --> 00:14:37.660
and I just felt, I felt nudged to put some worship music on

315
00:14:37.660 --> 00:14:40.400
and I listened to a song I haven't listened to in a while.

316
00:14:40.640 --> 00:14:43.680
And it just feels like it goes really well with tonight,

317
00:14:43.720 --> 00:14:45.440
but I wanna say something to you first.

318
00:14:46.120 --> 00:14:49.900
I wanna encourage you to let God add his super

319
00:14:50.200 --> 00:14:51.400
to your natural.

320
00:14:52.780 --> 00:14:56.300
To let God add his super to your natural.

321
00:14:56.920 --> 00:14:59.880
To encourage you to release everything

322
00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:04.960
into his care, to surrender completely, to release,

323
00:15:05.100 --> 00:15:09.960
is to allow something to move, act, or flow freely.

324
00:15:10.740 --> 00:15:14.380
So where are you currently still trying to clench it

325
00:15:14.380 --> 00:15:16.400
with a fist and hold on to it?

326
00:15:16.400 --> 00:15:19.400
And the Lord is saying, let go.

327
00:15:19.860 --> 00:15:22.340
Will you release this area of your heart to me?

328
00:15:23.380 --> 00:15:26.400
Will you allow me to come in and heal every area,

329
00:15:26.400 --> 00:15:30.440
even the vulnerable places, the scary places,

330
00:15:30.680 --> 00:15:33.720
the places that maybe even, man, you're kind of like,

331
00:15:33.720 --> 00:15:37.700
I should be back, excuse me, past this by now.

332
00:15:37.760 --> 00:15:40.440
Y'all, let's just let go of all of that.

333
00:15:42.260 --> 00:15:44.960
There's no age that limits you

334
00:15:44.960 --> 00:15:47.040
from healing and transformation.

335
00:15:47.800 --> 00:15:49.400
If we are still here,

336
00:15:49.660 --> 00:15:51.520
God has something he's doing in our lives.

337
00:15:52.100 --> 00:15:53.960
Not just something he wants us to do,

338
00:15:53.960 --> 00:15:56.080
something he wants to do in us.

339
00:15:56.780 --> 00:15:58.320
So Jesus, before I even play this song,

340
00:15:58.360 --> 00:16:02.100
just thank you for supernatural healing tonight.

341
00:16:02.260 --> 00:16:03.520
I pray that you would help the ladies

342
00:16:03.640 --> 00:16:06.000
open their hearts fully to you,

343
00:16:06.080 --> 00:16:08.780
to receive everything that you have for them,

344
00:16:09.480 --> 00:16:12.600
nothing missing, nothing lacking, nothing broken,

345
00:16:12.600 --> 00:16:15.720
that we would be made completely whole, Lord,

346
00:16:15.740 --> 00:16:19.000
in every way, in mind, body, spirit, soul,

347
00:16:19.020 --> 00:16:20.820
in our finances as well.

348
00:16:20.820 --> 00:16:22.520
God, we just thank you in advance for that.

349
00:16:22.520 --> 00:16:24.360
So I'm gonna play part of this song.

350
00:16:29.280 --> 00:16:30.640
All right.

351
00:16:31.440 --> 00:16:32.960
Sorry, y'all, I can't see.

352
00:16:33.100 --> 00:16:33.900
There we go.

353
00:16:43.840 --> 00:16:52.460
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

354
00:16:52.520 --> 00:17:00.040
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

355
00:17:01.080 --> 00:17:10.020
♪ Jesus is in this room, here I know, here I know ♪

356
00:17:10.020 --> 00:17:19.260
♪ Making this place I stand, holy ground, holy ground ♪

357
00:17:29.060 --> 00:17:30.680
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

358
00:17:31.260 --> 00:17:40.100
♪ Your spirit moves and breathes all around, all around ♪

359
00:17:40.100 --> 00:17:50.340
♪ All good and perfect things flowing down, flowing down ♪

360
00:17:50.340 --> 00:17:54.640
♪ Fall of the heavens are singing along ♪

361
00:17:54.640 --> 00:17:59.320
♪ With the saints and the elders in glorious song ♪

362
00:17:59.320 --> 00:18:03.960
♪ And the praises they sing never seem to get old ♪

363
00:18:03.960 --> 00:18:08.500
♪ And I'll stay here forever singing ♪

364
00:18:08.500 --> 00:18:16.800
♪ Holy, holy, holy Lord ♪

365
00:18:17.660 --> 00:18:26.560
♪ God Almighty over all ♪

366
00:18:26.560 --> 00:18:31.840
♪ You are, You are and You'll be forever ♪

367
00:18:31.840 --> 00:18:36.800
♪ The King enthroned in glorious splendor ♪

368
00:18:36.800 --> 00:18:43.420
♪ Holy, holy Lord ♪

369
00:18:47.020 --> 00:18:49.160
So Lord, we just thank You that You're holy,

370
00:18:49.400 --> 00:18:50.200
that You're mighty.

371
00:18:51.080 --> 00:18:52.960
God, that You created the heaven and the earth

372
00:18:52.960 --> 00:18:54.520
and nothing is too hard for You.

373
00:18:54.600 --> 00:18:56.420
I pray that You would help us, Holy Spirit,

374
00:18:57.100 --> 00:18:58.440
to partner with the truth,

375
00:18:59.520 --> 00:19:01.960
that You are the one that comes and sets us free,

376
00:19:02.220 --> 00:19:05.060
that where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty,

377
00:19:05.200 --> 00:19:06.520
there's freedom for the captive.

378
00:19:06.640 --> 00:19:09.120
So we thank You that You're opening prison gates tonight

379
00:19:09.380 --> 00:19:10.940
and that You're setting us free.

380
00:19:11.040 --> 00:19:13.180
You're helping us to step further into the fullness

381
00:19:13.180 --> 00:19:15.360
of who You originally created us to be, Father,

382
00:19:15.360 --> 00:19:17.860
before wounds or trauma ever entered.

383
00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:18.760
And I thank You, Lord,

384
00:19:18.800 --> 00:19:20.800
that You'll help us to connect with You, Father,

385
00:19:21.060 --> 00:19:24.520
as the vine a little bit more tonight,

386
00:19:24.540 --> 00:19:26.320
that we are the branches, You're the vine.

387
00:19:26.400 --> 00:19:28.140
We can't do anything apart from You.

388
00:19:28.280 --> 00:19:30.560
So Lord, I thank You that You'll help us

389
00:19:30.560 --> 00:19:33.080
to completely surrender all to You.

390
00:19:33.740 --> 00:19:37.800
God, I pray that You would help us to show us tangible ways

391
00:19:37.800 --> 00:19:40.420
that we can literally walk that out in our daily life.

392
00:19:41.240 --> 00:19:43.440
Lord, we thank You for meeting us here tonight

393
00:19:43.440 --> 00:19:46.240
in a fresh way, in Jesus' name, amen.

394
00:19:48.340 --> 00:19:49.500
Ladies, God is a gentleman.

395
00:19:49.980 --> 00:19:51.800
He's not gonna force His way in.

396
00:19:52.040 --> 00:19:55.360
He's not gonna literally come in and bang the door

397
00:19:55.360 --> 00:19:57.820
and the walls of your heart down.

398
00:19:58.440 --> 00:19:59.980
So tonight, He's standing at the door.

399
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:03.360
door of your heart and he's knocking and he's saying,

400
00:20:03.380 --> 00:20:06.540
will you let me come in to these vulnerable places?

401
00:20:06.740 --> 00:20:09.340
Will you let me come in and transform the way you see

402
00:20:09.540 --> 00:20:11.880
everything, including him?

403
00:20:14.740 --> 00:20:16.920
Part of the key here is that, you know,

404
00:20:16.920 --> 00:20:19.320
when we go through trauma, whether we realize it or not,

405
00:20:19.620 --> 00:20:20.900
we subconsciously erect,

406
00:20:21.260 --> 00:20:22.780
do not enter signs around our heart,

407
00:20:23.140 --> 00:20:25.880
even to the Lord, as well as to other people.

408
00:20:25.880 --> 00:20:30.760
And so little by little tonight, you know,

409
00:20:30.780 --> 00:20:33.680
I just, I believe by faith that God's going to ask you

410
00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:37.340
just to continue to let your walls come down,

411
00:20:39.340 --> 00:20:44.020
to allow him to come in to, again, those vulnerable places.

412
00:20:44.020 --> 00:20:45.700
We've had some great conversations.

413
00:20:45.700 --> 00:20:47.720
Like I said, this afternoon,

414
00:20:47.760 --> 00:20:51.300
just seeing ladies come in and just saying,

415
00:20:51.400 --> 00:20:51.620
you know what?

416
00:20:51.640 --> 00:20:53.760
I'm, I'm, I'm nervous that I'm going to talk.

417
00:20:54.480 --> 00:20:56.360
I'm nervous, but I'm going to post in the group.

418
00:20:57.160 --> 00:20:58.740
Ladies, I, I know it's hard.

419
00:20:58.900 --> 00:20:59.820
I did it.

420
00:21:00.760 --> 00:21:03.920
And I've led online community groups for years.

421
00:21:04.020 --> 00:21:08.740
And I want to say that if you are kind of staying on this

422
00:21:08.740 --> 00:21:12.440
outside right now, maybe you haven't posted yet in the group

423
00:21:12.440 --> 00:21:14.280
maybe you haven't shared yet openly.

424
00:21:15.540 --> 00:21:17.760
I want to encourage you to jump in tonight

425
00:21:18.320 --> 00:21:22.980
or tomorrow or whenever, but to overcome the fear

426
00:21:23.760 --> 00:21:26.200
and allow God to supernaturally transform you

427
00:21:26.200 --> 00:21:28.240
by connecting in community.

428
00:21:28.960 --> 00:21:29.080
Okay?

429
00:21:30.580 --> 00:21:33.940
So Revelation 3.20, the scripture that I prayed

430
00:21:33.940 --> 00:21:35.540
is John 15, four through five,

431
00:21:35.600 --> 00:21:39.600
where it talks about remaining in me as I remain in you.

432
00:21:39.700 --> 00:21:40.900
Jesus was talking there.

433
00:21:41.560 --> 00:21:44.020
I'm going to read Revelation 3.20 to you now.

434
00:21:44.220 --> 00:21:46.220
It says, behold, I stand at the door and knock.

435
00:21:46.560 --> 00:21:49.000
If any man hears my voice and opens the door,

436
00:21:49.080 --> 00:21:52.340
I will come into him and sup with him

437
00:21:52.940 --> 00:21:55.540
and me with, and he with me.

438
00:21:56.260 --> 00:21:58.020
Ladies, I want you to think about

439
00:21:58.100 --> 00:22:00.520
when you invite someone into your home,

440
00:22:00.520 --> 00:22:02.940
some of you don't even do that, you know,

441
00:22:02.960 --> 00:22:04.860
and no shame or condemnation.

442
00:22:04.880 --> 00:22:06.160
I have a lady in my church.

443
00:22:06.280 --> 00:22:09.140
I've been chatting with her about that.

444
00:22:09.360 --> 00:22:11.960
Her family, when she grew up, it was a rough home dynamic

445
00:22:12.580 --> 00:22:14.660
and her home was really messy a lot.

446
00:22:14.840 --> 00:22:15.780
Her mom was a hoarder.

447
00:22:15.900 --> 00:22:18.700
And so as an adult, she has found herself

448
00:22:18.700 --> 00:22:21.020
not really inviting people into her home,

449
00:22:21.740 --> 00:22:24.280
but it's not because she doesn't want to be close to people.

450
00:22:25.580 --> 00:22:27.160
And so maybe that's where you find yourself,

451
00:22:27.860 --> 00:22:30.120
that you've never opened the doors of your home.

452
00:22:30.220 --> 00:22:32.440
And so maybe you don't know what that intimacy

453
00:22:33.080 --> 00:22:35.740
over a meal feels like within your own home,

454
00:22:35.780 --> 00:22:37.980
but maybe you've experienced it in someone else's home.

455
00:22:37.980 --> 00:22:42.440
As a teenager, I can remember going to a good friend of mine,

456
00:22:43.000 --> 00:22:45.880
her family's home, and just her parents were still married.

457
00:22:46.460 --> 00:22:47.960
I'm not saying they had a perfect marriage,

458
00:22:48.040 --> 00:22:49.360
but they had a great marriage

459
00:22:49.920 --> 00:22:51.580
and they were somewhere,

460
00:22:51.660 --> 00:22:53.780
like I just always wanted to be at their house.

461
00:22:55.020 --> 00:22:57.540
And even in high school for our graduation,

462
00:22:58.140 --> 00:23:00.900
like a bunch of us friends went to the same house

463
00:23:00.900 --> 00:23:02.400
and we all had breakfast together

464
00:23:02.400 --> 00:23:04.040
on like our last day of school.

465
00:23:04.520 --> 00:23:07.700
And I just sit and think about how good that felt.

466
00:23:08.840 --> 00:23:10.720
And this is where I just kind of,

467
00:23:10.900 --> 00:23:13.740
I'm trying to give you a picture of this intimacy

468
00:23:13.900 --> 00:23:17.080
that the Lord is trying to have with you.

469
00:23:18.120 --> 00:23:21.120
Intimacy is into me.

470
00:23:22.520 --> 00:23:25.200
See, God already sees it all.

471
00:23:25.980 --> 00:23:28.760
It's whether or not you're willing to allow him

472
00:23:29.280 --> 00:23:31.460
to kind of come into those places

473
00:23:31.460 --> 00:23:33.800
and acknowledge that he sees it.

474
00:23:34.080 --> 00:23:37.560
He sees our messy places and he's like, I love you.

475
00:23:38.160 --> 00:23:41.020
I talked about disappointment this afternoon as well.

476
00:23:42.400 --> 00:23:45.720
And I just feel like it's important to say it again tonight.

477
00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:47.920
God is not disappointed in you.

478
00:23:48.700 --> 00:23:52.080
God is not withholding a husband from you.

479
00:23:53.640 --> 00:23:56.800
Okay, some of you are believing that lie

480
00:23:57.740 --> 00:24:00.080
because it's been a long time and you've been praying

481
00:24:00.080 --> 00:24:00.980
and you don't understand

482
00:24:00.980 --> 00:24:02.560
why your prayers haven't been answered.

483
00:24:03.460 --> 00:24:06.180
And one of the things, even though we don't realize it,

484
00:24:06.200 --> 00:24:09.540
that's really tricky is our counterfeit identities

485
00:24:09.540 --> 00:24:12.580
for some of you have caused you to be in a waiting room.

486
00:24:13.320 --> 00:24:15.840
Some of you, because of religious teachings,

487
00:24:16.460 --> 00:24:19.820
you've been under, you've been waiting for kind of like

488
00:24:19.820 --> 00:24:22.720
the beam me up Scotty, it's like beam me down a spirit mate

489
00:24:22.720 --> 00:24:25.480
and we're waiting for God to just literally drop someone

490
00:24:25.480 --> 00:24:26.540
in our living room.

491
00:24:26.980 --> 00:24:29.140
Y'all, I wanted God to bring someone to my door

492
00:24:29.140 --> 00:24:30.240
and I've been married before.

493
00:24:30.420 --> 00:24:33.200
So I can imagine for those of you

494
00:24:33.400 --> 00:24:36.060
that haven't been married yet, the struggle there.

495
00:24:36.760 --> 00:24:39.160
But this is the thing we were talking as well

496
00:24:39.160 --> 00:24:40.440
as about prophetic words.

497
00:24:40.440 --> 00:24:44.360
And I believe in the prophetic, I operate in the prophetic,

498
00:24:44.600 --> 00:24:47.680
but I want you all to also be thinking about this.

499
00:24:48.560 --> 00:24:50.760
Even if you've received a prophetic word,

500
00:24:51.240 --> 00:24:52.580
part of the struggle is that some of you

501
00:24:52.580 --> 00:24:54.540
got a prophetic word and that didn't happen yet.

502
00:24:54.660 --> 00:24:57.020
And so it's like, wait a minute, there's a disconnect here.

503
00:24:57.160 --> 00:24:57.920
Something's going on.

504
00:24:58.360 --> 00:24:59.980
So was that real or did God not?

505
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:01.320
really want marriage for me.

506
00:25:01.940 --> 00:25:04.520
And what I want you to hear tonight is that again,

507
00:25:04.520 --> 00:25:08.120
we have to let God add his super to our natural.

508
00:25:08.560 --> 00:25:11.880
We have to partner with him, even in a prophetic word.

509
00:25:12.360 --> 00:25:14.680
One of the examples I gave is years ago,

510
00:25:15.740 --> 00:25:17.840
God spoke a prophetic word over me.

511
00:25:18.260 --> 00:25:19.940
It's way more in depth than this,

512
00:25:20.040 --> 00:25:22.020
but kind of the quick version for you tonight

513
00:25:22.020 --> 00:25:25.360
is that he said that he was gonna use me

514
00:25:25.360 --> 00:25:28.460
and my administration gift to help further

515
00:25:28.460 --> 00:25:30.380
some other people's ministries

516
00:25:30.380 --> 00:25:33.780
before he was gonna call me directly into something.

517
00:25:34.380 --> 00:25:37.160
And you all, that was long before I ever helped Jackie

518
00:25:37.160 --> 00:25:38.580
or became a part of this movement

519
00:25:38.580 --> 00:25:40.720
and serving it and leading in it.

520
00:25:40.720 --> 00:25:43.380
And so I wanna encourage you,

521
00:25:43.780 --> 00:25:46.360
it wasn't like God just caused this to happen.

522
00:25:47.020 --> 00:25:48.060
God said to me one day,

523
00:25:48.280 --> 00:25:50.580
hey, reach out to Jackie and ask her if she needs help

524
00:25:50.580 --> 00:25:52.420
and offer to help her with whatever she needs.

525
00:25:52.840 --> 00:25:54.500
And y'all, she didn't answer me.

526
00:25:54.980 --> 00:25:57.860
So I waited and God nudged me again

527
00:25:57.860 --> 00:25:59.940
and I reached out to her again and she said,

528
00:26:00.020 --> 00:26:01.600
yeah, you know, I'll pray about that.

529
00:26:01.680 --> 00:26:03.840
And it was weeks, maybe a month,

530
00:26:03.860 --> 00:26:04.920
I don't even remember how long.

531
00:26:05.360 --> 00:26:08.060
And then I went to one of our retreats

532
00:26:08.060 --> 00:26:09.940
and this was the first retreat we ever did.

533
00:26:11.920 --> 00:26:13.800
And literally, I had no clue.

534
00:26:13.940 --> 00:26:15.860
She was kind of like still thinking about that.

535
00:26:16.560 --> 00:26:18.140
And before I left the retreat that weekend,

536
00:26:18.140 --> 00:26:20.180
she said, hey, David and I wanna talk with you.

537
00:26:20.500 --> 00:26:21.560
We wanna interview you.

538
00:26:21.840 --> 00:26:24.200
Can you jump in our car while we drive over to this place?

539
00:26:24.260 --> 00:26:25.860
Y'all, my heart was racing.

540
00:26:26.680 --> 00:26:29.060
But I'm giving this to you as an example, okay?

541
00:26:29.220 --> 00:26:31.200
There were several things I had to do

542
00:26:31.400 --> 00:26:33.260
and I also had to have faith and trust,

543
00:26:33.320 --> 00:26:34.600
but I had to keep walking it out.

544
00:26:34.700 --> 00:26:36.740
And even after I talked to her that day in the car,

545
00:26:36.820 --> 00:26:38.120
it wasn't just like right that day.

546
00:26:38.140 --> 00:26:39.700
She said, yeah, we wanna do this,

547
00:26:39.860 --> 00:26:41.220
but there were some other things

548
00:26:41.220 --> 00:26:42.460
that had to kind of fall in place.

549
00:26:42.740 --> 00:26:45.380
This is how we partner with a prophetic word.

550
00:26:45.900 --> 00:26:48.340
We walk it out, okay?

551
00:26:49.240 --> 00:26:51.420
So if that is you and you've been struggling

552
00:26:51.420 --> 00:26:52.300
and you're just like, man,

553
00:26:52.300 --> 00:26:53.400
I don't know what to do with that.

554
00:26:53.400 --> 00:26:55.560
I hope that that brings some clarity for you.

555
00:26:56.380 --> 00:26:57.920
And if you're like me and you're like,

556
00:26:57.920 --> 00:26:59.160
God, please bring them to my door

557
00:26:59.160 --> 00:27:00.920
because I don't wanna do this and I don't wanna do that.

558
00:27:01.420 --> 00:27:03.900
We just gotta surrender it all, ladies.

559
00:27:04.460 --> 00:27:09.260
We gotta surrender the pen fully tonight in every area.

560
00:27:09.720 --> 00:27:12.000
The never will I ever list that y'all did.

561
00:27:12.120 --> 00:27:14.940
Some of y'all got really brave and you were really honest.

562
00:27:14.980 --> 00:27:16.700
And then you said something like

563
00:27:16.700 --> 00:27:18.000
this probably sounds super official.

564
00:27:18.320 --> 00:27:19.160
It's okay.

565
00:27:19.720 --> 00:27:20.640
Here's the goal.

566
00:27:20.680 --> 00:27:22.080
It's to get it all out.

567
00:27:22.080 --> 00:27:24.600
You like literally just play it all out there

568
00:27:24.880 --> 00:27:26.460
because some of that stuff,

569
00:27:26.860 --> 00:27:28.560
while it might sound superficial,

570
00:27:28.740 --> 00:27:31.020
it's coming from somewhere in us.

571
00:27:31.700 --> 00:27:34.240
So we need to know really what's going on

572
00:27:34.240 --> 00:27:36.520
inside of you all so that we can help you process.

573
00:27:36.700 --> 00:27:39.000
Some of y'all have some things on your list

574
00:27:39.000 --> 00:27:40.240
that have come from pain

575
00:27:40.760 --> 00:27:44.680
and we won't know if you don't put it out there, okay?

576
00:27:45.400 --> 00:27:48.980
So the step that we did last week was to prepare you

577
00:27:48.980 --> 00:27:50.240
and keep preparing you.

578
00:27:50.240 --> 00:27:51.980
And it's okay if you are starting,

579
00:27:52.120 --> 00:27:54.080
this is your first week, you won't miss out on it.

580
00:27:54.080 --> 00:27:56.620
At some point, we'll circle back to that.

581
00:27:57.000 --> 00:28:00.300
But it's to prepare you to now come in and say,

582
00:28:00.380 --> 00:28:03.640
okay, yeah, that's not a God non-negotiable.

583
00:28:04.280 --> 00:28:06.200
That's something in me.

584
00:28:06.680 --> 00:28:08.980
And Lord, I'm gonna give that to you.

585
00:28:09.000 --> 00:28:11.220
I'm gonna surrender that to you.

586
00:28:12.100 --> 00:28:14.120
We've had people in our community that said

587
00:28:14.120 --> 00:28:16.240
they never wanted to date or marry someone

588
00:28:16.240 --> 00:28:18.600
that was a pastor or in ministry at all

589
00:28:18.600 --> 00:28:19.720
because they were a PK

590
00:28:19.740 --> 00:28:22.320
and there's no way they wanted that.

591
00:28:22.900 --> 00:28:25.240
And you all, this one lady, even recently,

592
00:28:25.680 --> 00:28:27.360
we've had a lot of people testifying

593
00:28:27.360 --> 00:28:29.480
that God just had to keep working on them

594
00:28:29.480 --> 00:28:31.000
to surrender certain things.

595
00:28:32.000 --> 00:28:35.340
And she felt led to finally surrender this thing.

596
00:28:35.980 --> 00:28:40.120
Like, okay, Lord, whoever you have for me.

597
00:28:40.240 --> 00:28:42.400
And y'all, within, I'm not joking,

598
00:28:42.680 --> 00:28:45.660
within a matter of weeks, maybe a month,

599
00:28:46.320 --> 00:28:48.800
God brought someone into her life that was a youth,

600
00:28:49.100 --> 00:28:53.680
is a youth pastor, and they're engaged.

601
00:28:53.800 --> 00:28:55.360
They're getting ready to get married.

602
00:28:55.980 --> 00:28:57.440
Was that what she wanted?

603
00:28:58.800 --> 00:29:01.180
No, but that's what God had for her.

604
00:29:02.640 --> 00:29:03.980
We don't always understand,

605
00:29:04.140 --> 00:29:05.500
and I don't wanna freak you all out

606
00:29:05.500 --> 00:29:07.080
because if that's where some of you are at,

607
00:29:07.580 --> 00:29:09.920
I know it's a process for you to get your heart

608
00:29:09.920 --> 00:29:12.560
to that place to receive what God has for you.

609
00:29:13.220 --> 00:29:15.700
But I promise he's not gonna force you.

610
00:29:15.700 --> 00:29:17.780
That was still an invitation for her.

611
00:29:18.100 --> 00:29:19.400
Could God have brought her someone else?

612
00:29:20.040 --> 00:29:23.440
Sure, but she was willing to surrender that.

613
00:29:23.580 --> 00:29:26.760
And now she's really enjoying this guy that she's with

614
00:29:26.760 --> 00:29:28.100
and God is doing great things.

615
00:29:28.740 --> 00:29:31.220
So keep that kind of stirring in your mind.

616
00:29:31.240 --> 00:29:32.060
We're gonna keep going.

617
00:29:32.320 --> 00:29:33.680
I'm gonna read a little bit to you

618
00:29:33.680 --> 00:29:36.020
from chapter three in the HeartWork book

619
00:29:36.420 --> 00:29:38.000
about supernatural surrender

620
00:29:38.300 --> 00:29:40.860
to continue to kind of prime your hearts.

621
00:29:41.720 --> 00:29:42.560
And this is what it says.

622
00:29:42.860 --> 00:29:44.880
"'Ever since we were toddlers,

623
00:29:45.100 --> 00:29:48.000
our mantra has been, I do it myself.

624
00:29:48.280 --> 00:29:50.340
We have been programmed by our broken world

625
00:29:50.340 --> 00:29:53.160
to never depend on anyone or anything.

626
00:29:53.740 --> 00:29:57.320
And people that do that are, excuse me,

627
00:29:57.380 --> 00:29:59.460
and people that do depend on other people

628
00:29:59.460 --> 00:29:59.980
are considered.'

629
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:05.640
foolish and naive all through our lives we are taught overtly and covertly that it's a good

630
00:30:05.640 --> 00:30:11.640
thing to be in and stay in control and that it's a and that is a lot of hard work we don't need to

631
00:30:11.640 --> 00:30:17.220
be in control ladies we're actually never in control just so y'all know we are actually we

632
00:30:17.220 --> 00:30:22.820
get to choose but what i mean by that is like sometimes we are trying to like hold on to

633
00:30:22.820 --> 00:30:29.460
something and we think we've got control but like in reality god is the one that's saying

634
00:30:29.460 --> 00:30:35.640
control of the universe and the things he gives us free will to choose but it's a choice

635
00:30:36.100 --> 00:30:42.680
it's not it's not control there's a difference keep going one of the main reasons we don't

636
00:30:42.680 --> 00:30:49.740
depend on anyone else is we don't want to be disappointed being disappointed is painful

637
00:30:49.740 --> 00:30:56.420
maybe even more painful than not trusting anyone to help us in the first place and this applies

638
00:30:56.420 --> 00:31:00.880
to god too let's talk about disappointment i don't think we talk about it enough we often

639
00:31:00.880 --> 00:31:05.440
pretend like the life of a believer is supposed to be rainbows and butterflies and we always have

640
00:31:05.440 --> 00:31:09.840
to be happy and you know there nothing can go wrong or we can't even be disappointed in god

641
00:31:09.840 --> 00:31:14.920
you all i'm kind of riffing here i'm not going with the whole book but god is saying bring it

642
00:31:14.920 --> 00:31:20.460
all to me tonight i already know you're disappointed daughter so just bring it to me and let

643
00:31:20.460 --> 00:31:26.260
me help you work through it i'm gonna keep going on so many times we think we've asked god to help

644
00:31:26.260 --> 00:31:30.540
us but then when the answer doesn't show up immediately or in the way we want it to we think

645
00:31:30.540 --> 00:31:35.680
god has failed us we think god is not doing what we have asked him to do when in reality he's doing

646
00:31:35.820 --> 00:31:41.160
exactly what we've asked him to do but because it doesn't feel good we declare god incompetent

647
00:31:41.320 --> 00:31:56.240
and off we go trying to fix it ourselves self-help is not a thing god doesn't ever tell us to go

648
00:31:56.240 --> 00:32:03.520
god sent literally jesus as you all know why did he send jesus well to die for us

649
00:32:04.220 --> 00:32:08.340
so that we could be healed so that we could walk into salvation so that we could be in relationship

650
00:32:08.340 --> 00:32:13.680
with him and then when jesus ascended they sent the holy spirit to be our comforter our counselor

651
00:32:13.680 --> 00:32:21.200
our guide they didn't have to do that but they did and because of that we literally never have

652
00:32:21.200 --> 00:32:28.280
to walk through anything alone even surrendering ladies you don't have to do this by yourself

653
00:32:28.560 --> 00:32:36.660
if you feel like i can't i don't know how ask the holy spirit to enable you y'all when i need help

654
00:32:36.680 --> 00:32:42.620
myself as well i'm just like god i can't do this like even some days like just running you know

655
00:32:42.620 --> 00:32:48.040
things unless you're single or doing things at the church like i need his help all the time

656
00:32:48.680 --> 00:32:55.200
i need his help to give patience to people when i don't feel patient with them

657
00:32:56.060 --> 00:33:00.380
whatever it is he's willing he's able are you willing to ask for his help

658
00:33:00.940 --> 00:33:08.160
okay let's circle back to the i do it myself i want to talk about some ways practically this

659
00:33:08.160 --> 00:33:13.520
shows up in our lives on a daily basis and these there's so many more ladies but i'm just trying

660
00:33:13.520 --> 00:33:18.540
to give you a couple tonight and a couple different categories to to hopefully help you

661
00:33:18.540 --> 00:33:24.160
see where this i do it myself or god i've got this kind of like i don't need your help god

662
00:33:24.160 --> 00:33:31.040
even if we're not saying that to him in our mind or out loud there are things that we are choosing

663
00:33:31.040 --> 00:33:39.200
to do that is actually through our actions saying to god i got this and we're just getting ahead of

664
00:33:40.280 --> 00:33:45.880
and so here they are here are some relationship areas where this can show up controlling

665
00:33:46.240 --> 00:33:52.200
conversations or outcomes during a conflict rather than seeking god's wisdom first now this

666
00:33:52.200 --> 00:33:58.360
is all relationships have any of you ever like chased a person down because you all are in a

667
00:33:58.360 --> 00:34:05.320
disagreement and you're just so worried about the outcome that you're just trying to fix it fix it

668
00:34:05.320 --> 00:34:15.440
yourself and god's just like hey daughter stops driving give this to me let me work in that

669
00:34:16.199 --> 00:34:26.159
person's heart but see sometimes even that takes too long doesn't it and so we try to take it back

670
00:34:26.980 --> 00:34:33.340
and we're coming with our our hammers and our our screwdrivers and our we're deciding all the

671
00:34:33.340 --> 00:34:39.300
areas these people need their fixes and we're oftentimes not even willing to look at our own

672
00:34:41.719 --> 00:34:47.460
selves let's let's focus on what is god trying to do in us some of you all because you're such

673
00:34:47.460 --> 00:34:54.460
good fixers and helpers you're busy fixing everybody else and you're avoiding your own heart

674
00:34:54.460 --> 00:34:55.199
and you're doing your own work

675
00:34:56.719 --> 00:34:58.980
it's your time this is your time

676
00:35:00.780 --> 00:35:05.740
And the way that transformation and change happens for you and the way that you meet

677
00:35:05.740 --> 00:35:11.420
a healthy spirit mate is by doing the hard work and not avoiding the areas that you need

678
00:35:11.420 --> 00:35:13.180
God to help you.

679
00:35:13.620 --> 00:35:15.900
And it's okay that you need his help.

680
00:35:16.520 --> 00:35:20.540
Y'all, I was reading a scripture tonight and I don't think it's by coincidence, actually

681
00:35:20.540 --> 00:35:25.260
was like, I don't read Psalms every day, but I do this little thing where I write when

682
00:35:25.260 --> 00:35:27.540
the last date I read it and what Psalm I read.

683
00:35:27.540 --> 00:35:32.280
And I was kind of like, Whoa, it's been a lot of days since I read the Psalms that kind

684
00:35:32.280 --> 00:35:32.880
of made me sad.

685
00:35:32.980 --> 00:35:39.500
But tonight, I don't think it's a coincidence, but I was reading in Psalm 82 and 83.

686
00:35:39.700 --> 00:35:44.360
And in 82, there's this scripture that comes right after I'm going to read verse three

687
00:35:44.360 --> 00:35:45.040
to you as well.

688
00:35:45.360 --> 00:35:50.620
But it says, defend the weak and the fatherless, uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.

689
00:35:50.760 --> 00:35:57.440
And then verse four is what caught my attention, rescue the weak and the needy, deliver them

690
00:35:57.440 --> 00:35:58.580
from the hand of the wicked.

691
00:35:59.240 --> 00:36:05.980
This word needy here actually means in the Hebrew in want, needy, chiefly, poor, needy

692
00:36:05.980 --> 00:36:12.960
person subject to oppression and abuse, needing help, deliverance from trouble, especially

693
00:36:13.200 --> 00:36:14.660
as delivered by God.

694
00:36:14.660 --> 00:36:20.620
It stuck out to me because this afternoon we had several ladies on that had been sexually

695
00:36:20.620 --> 00:36:25.560
abused, physically abused, emotionally abused, and I'm pretty confident there's several on

696
00:36:25.560 --> 00:36:26.500
here tonight as well.

697
00:36:27.460 --> 00:36:33.960
So if that's you, if you have been through abuse and oppression and you need deliverance,

698
00:36:34.260 --> 00:36:40.240
God wants you to know tonight that he sees you and that you can be healed completely.

699
00:36:41.100 --> 00:36:42.440
It takes time, ladies.

700
00:36:42.560 --> 00:36:47.580
I'm still healing from stuff, but man, I'm so much healthier now than I was before.

701
00:36:47.700 --> 00:36:52.480
And because of that, I was able to attract someone else that was healthy, but God wants

702
00:36:52.480 --> 00:36:57.480
to meet you right in the middle of that stuff and literally place the healing balm of Gilead

703
00:36:57.480 --> 00:37:00.860
upon it and wants you to know that you're not alone.

704
00:37:02.000 --> 00:37:03.140
Okay, I'm going to keep going.

705
00:37:03.560 --> 00:37:07.420
Another area where we're like, I do it myself or God, I've got this in relationships is

706
00:37:07.420 --> 00:37:12.180
making major relationship decisions without prayer or godly counsel.

707
00:37:13.080 --> 00:37:18.760
Y'all one of the amazing benefits of this community is that we do community coaching.

708
00:37:18.760 --> 00:37:22.820
We do community like, Hey, come in here and tell us about this relationship.

709
00:37:23.080 --> 00:37:27.120
Not in this heart work, but in the other phases, Hey, tell us how your dating's going.

710
00:37:27.220 --> 00:37:28.240
Tell us about this relationship.

711
00:37:28.360 --> 00:37:28.940
What are you finding?

712
00:37:28.940 --> 00:37:30.880
Like, what are you seeing good fruit in this person?

713
00:37:30.960 --> 00:37:36.420
We just want to know it so we can help you, you know, really decide, okay, is this the

714
00:37:36.420 --> 00:37:37.360
best fit for me?

715
00:37:37.900 --> 00:37:42.440
Is this someone, and for some of you try to keep you from cutting and running when it's

716
00:37:42.440 --> 00:37:43.420
a really great person.

717
00:37:43.420 --> 00:37:50.460
Because, hey, they don't, they don't make you feel all hot and, you know, sweaty on

718
00:37:50.460 --> 00:37:51.200
the first date.

719
00:37:51.540 --> 00:37:53.140
You know what I'm talking about?

720
00:37:54.020 --> 00:37:54.880
Y'all I've been there.

721
00:37:55.920 --> 00:37:57.280
Those aren't the good ones.

722
00:37:57.440 --> 00:37:58.080
I promise.

723
00:37:58.380 --> 00:38:01.420
It doesn't mean you can't, it doesn't mean we're not going to be attractive to people,

724
00:38:01.640 --> 00:38:07.280
but that's typically lust ladies and full operation.

725
00:38:07.580 --> 00:38:13.100
When you feel that whole like, like you just can't just stay away from that person, you

726
00:38:13.100 --> 00:38:15.020
know, and you have all these things riled up.

727
00:38:15.020 --> 00:38:15.460
Yep.

728
00:38:16.200 --> 00:38:21.260
And sometimes that's causing some of you to get ahead of God and choose someone that's

729
00:38:21.260 --> 00:38:21.740
not healthy.

730
00:38:23.100 --> 00:38:29.680
So we got to pray, we got to stay in community because community will be a game changer.

731
00:38:29.800 --> 00:38:30.120
All right.

732
00:38:30.120 --> 00:38:35.360
Another one, trying to earn love through performance instead of resting in God's unconditional

733
00:38:35.360 --> 00:38:35.820
love.

734
00:38:36.520 --> 00:38:41.720
So are you someone that's trying to earn love through your performance and feeling like

735
00:38:41.720 --> 00:38:45.100
you have to be perfect because God doesn't want that for you.

736
00:38:46.300 --> 00:38:50.560
Y'all even in my biggest imperfections and my worst days, my husband loves me and I'm

737
00:38:50.560 --> 00:38:51.160
so grateful.

738
00:38:52.140 --> 00:38:53.480
And that's what God has for you.

739
00:38:54.380 --> 00:38:58.180
Here's some other areas, financial and career, making financial decisions based solely on

740
00:38:58.200 --> 00:39:00.380
our own understanding without seeking God's direction.

741
00:39:00.580 --> 00:39:01.180
Here's another one.

742
00:39:01.420 --> 00:39:04.540
You know, again, we're, we're going to see this multiple times showing up where we're

743
00:39:04.540 --> 00:39:09.180
just kind of moving ahead of God, hoarding resources out of fear instead of trusting

744
00:39:09.180 --> 00:39:10.540
God as our provider.

745
00:39:12.080 --> 00:39:17.860
So maybe you're afraid to spend because you're afraid that God won't provide for something

746
00:39:17.860 --> 00:39:18.580
that you need.

747
00:39:19.800 --> 00:39:26.260
It could be the opposite side and you're overspending and not making healthy, wise, doer decisions.

748
00:39:26.400 --> 00:39:27.460
I've been there as well.

749
00:39:27.920 --> 00:39:30.980
And that comes from actually brokenness in our hearts, ladies.

750
00:39:32.680 --> 00:39:33.280
Okay.

751
00:39:33.280 --> 00:39:37.760
Parenting and family, trying to control our children's every choice instead of training

752
00:39:37.760 --> 00:39:40.800
them and trusting God with their hearts.

753
00:39:41.600 --> 00:39:47.680
There's some of you struggling with your kids and really relinquishing, I mean, we got to

754
00:39:47.680 --> 00:39:47.960
parent them.

755
00:39:48.080 --> 00:39:48.280
Okay.

756
00:39:48.280 --> 00:39:54.500
I'm not saying don't parent them, but some of you have adult children that you're still

757
00:39:54.500 --> 00:39:57.460
trying to control the outcome in that child's life.

758
00:39:58.700 --> 00:39:59.980
And having adults, uh,

759
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:00.000


760
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:01.040
I've had a lot of, you know,

761
00:40:01.040 --> 00:40:02.200
I've had a lot of spiritual daughters, y'all,

762
00:40:02.360 --> 00:40:04.780
I can tell you it's not easy.

763
00:40:04.960 --> 00:40:06.920
I keep having my eye twitching y'all.

764
00:40:07.100 --> 00:40:09.340
So I just, I'm like, on occasion, I keep touching it

765
00:40:09.340 --> 00:40:11.560
because it's really like really distracting,

766
00:40:11.840 --> 00:40:13.320
but so I'm not crying.

767
00:40:13.640 --> 00:40:15.000
I'm not wiping my tears,

768
00:40:15.520 --> 00:40:17.140
but so I wanted y'all to know it's fine,

769
00:40:18.300 --> 00:40:23.040
but you know, it's really tough when my spiritual daughters,

770
00:40:23.040 --> 00:40:24.520
they're both living with boyfriends

771
00:40:24.520 --> 00:40:27.800
and I mean, I've coached them, I've talked to them.

772
00:40:28.300 --> 00:40:30.160
At the end of the day, I love them

773
00:40:30.160 --> 00:40:31.520
and that's what they know.

774
00:40:31.560 --> 00:40:33.880
I don't like the decisions they're making.

775
00:40:34.380 --> 00:40:36.440
They know that, but I say it kindly,

776
00:40:37.620 --> 00:40:38.940
but I'm here for them

777
00:40:38.940 --> 00:40:42.360
and I'm willing to walk through the messy with them.

778
00:40:42.620 --> 00:40:44.080
And so for some of you,

779
00:40:44.140 --> 00:40:45.160
maybe there's something else

780
00:40:45.160 --> 00:40:46.600
that your kids are doing right now

781
00:40:46.600 --> 00:40:47.920
and they're just not living

782
00:40:49.040 --> 00:40:51.220
into the best version of themselves,

783
00:40:51.220 --> 00:40:53.960
but I wanna encourage you to continue to pray for them

784
00:40:54.620 --> 00:40:59.300
and try to let, you know, put them on Jesus cares board.

785
00:40:59.400 --> 00:41:01.460
And I, when I put my girls on here,

786
00:41:01.460 --> 00:41:02.920
I don't just put them on there.

787
00:41:03.000 --> 00:41:04.320
I put a picture of them.

788
00:41:04.320 --> 00:41:06.400
I put like specifically, Jesus,

789
00:41:06.540 --> 00:41:08.280
I need you to do this in them.

790
00:41:08.540 --> 00:41:11.000
And if it's Jesus's plan, he'll do it.

791
00:41:11.100 --> 00:41:12.860
If it's not his plan, he won't.

792
00:41:13.040 --> 00:41:13.820
Okay, and that's cool.

793
00:41:13.820 --> 00:41:15.340
But I do believe God wants,

794
00:41:15.340 --> 00:41:16.720
like my oldest spiritual daughter,

795
00:41:16.780 --> 00:41:19.020
she's really struggling with like not eating.

796
00:41:19.640 --> 00:41:22.780
She's like 22 and 98 pounds, y'all.

797
00:41:22.940 --> 00:41:24.760
She's very tiny right now.

798
00:41:25.080 --> 00:41:28.900
She's literally, that's a control thing that kicked in

799
00:41:29.720 --> 00:41:32.320
as she was going through some of her final high school years

800
00:41:32.320 --> 00:41:34.160
and sometimes when she's just really stressed,

801
00:41:34.240 --> 00:41:35.220
she just doesn't eat.

802
00:41:35.740 --> 00:41:39.260
And so something we're working on and I worry about her

803
00:41:39.260 --> 00:41:42.060
and I worry about the fact that she's not, you know,

804
00:41:42.060 --> 00:41:44.260
taking showers and taking care of herself,

805
00:41:44.340 --> 00:41:45.380
all these things.

806
00:41:45.800 --> 00:41:48.140
And I wanna drive up to Kentucky

807
00:41:48.140 --> 00:41:50.760
and literally take her in my car and bring her down here.

808
00:41:50.780 --> 00:41:52.320
That's what I really wanna do.

809
00:41:54.400 --> 00:41:57.880
But I have to surrender her to the Lord

810
00:41:57.880 --> 00:42:01.340
because she's an adult and she has to make her own choices.

811
00:42:01.540 --> 00:42:03.200
So I hope this is ministering to someone.

812
00:42:03.620 --> 00:42:04.920
Y'all, we all go through things

813
00:42:05.240 --> 00:42:07.140
and God wants to meet you right in the middle of that.

814
00:42:07.280 --> 00:42:09.680
Here's another one, fixing every problem for our kids

815
00:42:09.820 --> 00:42:11.500
rather than allowing them to learn

816
00:42:11.500 --> 00:42:12.840
and grow through challenges.

817
00:42:13.300 --> 00:42:16.240
Y'all, we see this even on the lowest, youngest levels now.

818
00:42:16.240 --> 00:42:19.460
Kids are like in our sports, there's no losers.

819
00:42:20.520 --> 00:42:23.660
Everybody's a winner and it's not gonna help our kids.

820
00:42:24.040 --> 00:42:27.040
It's not, but you're gonna see that show up

821
00:42:27.040 --> 00:42:28.960
in all different kinds of ways where you're gonna,

822
00:42:29.280 --> 00:42:31.180
some of you all made mistakes in the past

823
00:42:31.320 --> 00:42:33.980
and you're trying to overcompensate for mistakes

824
00:42:34.640 --> 00:42:36.520
by doing things for your kids

825
00:42:36.520 --> 00:42:38.840
that they really should be doing for themselves

826
00:42:38.840 --> 00:42:40.240
at the age that they're at.

827
00:42:40.500 --> 00:42:42.660
And so I wanna encourage y'all to be praying into that.

828
00:42:42.680 --> 00:42:44.940
Is there anything the Lord wants you to surrender to him

829
00:42:44.940 --> 00:42:45.820
regarding your kids?

830
00:42:46.360 --> 00:42:48.040
Here's a couple more, personal growth,

831
00:42:48.280 --> 00:42:49.840
white knuckling through bad habits

832
00:42:49.840 --> 00:42:52.880
instead of inviting God into the transformation process.

833
00:42:53.380 --> 00:42:55.300
So the way we talk about that in this community

834
00:42:55.300 --> 00:42:59.860
is that some of us, we're just trying to behavior modify.

835
00:43:00.180 --> 00:43:03.000
We're trying to be good for a little bit of time

836
00:43:03.000 --> 00:43:05.620
and then it's not sustainable ladies, okay?

837
00:43:05.760 --> 00:43:09.620
So even for some of you, I referenced things

838
00:43:09.620 --> 00:43:12.660
like maybe we're getting caught up in sex before marriage,

839
00:43:12.660 --> 00:43:14.600
maybe we're allowing ourselves

840
00:43:14.600 --> 00:43:17.080
to get connected to someone physically, whatever.

841
00:43:17.400 --> 00:43:19.640
Maybe it's other things for you all, pornography,

842
00:43:19.820 --> 00:43:23.760
whatever it is, we want long-term transformation

843
00:43:23.760 --> 00:43:25.140
and that comes through heart healing.

844
00:43:25.380 --> 00:43:27.180
So let's just be honest

845
00:43:27.180 --> 00:43:28.860
about the things we're struggling with

846
00:43:29.780 --> 00:43:31.700
and bring that to the Lord

847
00:43:31.700 --> 00:43:33.760
and let him reveal the root of that.

848
00:43:33.960 --> 00:43:35.980
When was the first time you started struggling

849
00:43:35.980 --> 00:43:36.720
with that thing?

850
00:43:37.580 --> 00:43:38.580
What's the root?

851
00:43:39.180 --> 00:43:40.660
Let him help you get to that.

852
00:43:40.660 --> 00:43:42.600
Trying to heal our own emotional wounds

853
00:43:42.600 --> 00:43:44.500
without letting God into the painful places

854
00:43:44.580 --> 00:43:46.680
and then comparing our journey to others

855
00:43:46.680 --> 00:43:49.040
and trying to fast track our growth.

856
00:43:49.060 --> 00:43:50.220
Those are two.

857
00:43:51.000 --> 00:43:53.100
So if you are even comparing your journey

858
00:43:53.100 --> 00:43:54.620
to someone else here in the heartwork,

859
00:43:54.640 --> 00:43:58.080
I wanna encourage you to really surrender that to the Lord.

860
00:43:58.660 --> 00:43:59.940
That's the trap of the enemy.

861
00:44:00.440 --> 00:44:02.480
He's trying to get you all, all of us, all the time.

862
00:44:02.520 --> 00:44:04.760
He always wants us to compare ourselves to other people

863
00:44:05.180 --> 00:44:07.860
and you all, if we will just continue to surrender that

864
00:44:07.860 --> 00:44:10.940
and just, okay, Lord, like my journey is my journey.

865
00:44:11.000 --> 00:44:13.720
I'm so thankful that you're on my journey with me, God,

866
00:44:13.800 --> 00:44:15.380
and you're giving me everything I need

867
00:44:15.380 --> 00:44:16.300
every step of the way.

868
00:44:16.340 --> 00:44:17.900
And if we partner with that stuff,

869
00:44:18.260 --> 00:44:21.220
man, we'll just defeat the enemy all day long.

870
00:44:21.760 --> 00:44:23.920
And remember that God is the one that defeats him,

871
00:44:23.960 --> 00:44:25.480
but we can partner with God in that

872
00:44:25.760 --> 00:44:28.400
and stand in the authority that God has given us

873
00:44:28.400 --> 00:44:29.220
to stand in.

874
00:44:30.540 --> 00:44:32.580
Greater is he that is in us than he that is in the world.

875
00:44:32.640 --> 00:44:35.920
No matter what we go through, ladies, God is with us.

876
00:44:36.380 --> 00:44:36.820
Okay?

877
00:44:37.340 --> 00:44:40.420
All right, so I wanna go through a couple more things

878
00:44:40.420 --> 00:44:42.680
and then I'm gonna pass it to Annette here really soon.

879
00:44:44.020 --> 00:44:48.440
So the reminder is that you don't have to try to figure this

880
00:44:48.440 --> 00:44:49.120
out on your own.

881
00:44:49.280 --> 00:44:50.520
The Holy Spirit is the advocate.

882
00:44:50.820 --> 00:44:52.640
He's your one, as I was talking about earlier,

883
00:44:52.660 --> 00:44:53.520
to take you by the hand.

884
00:44:53.600 --> 00:44:54.500
You don't have to dig.

885
00:44:55.160 --> 00:44:58.160
We want you to ask the Lord to reveal the areas for healing,

886
00:44:58.300 --> 00:44:59.840
to bring the things out of darkness.

887
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.500
Into the light. Where's the darkness? Well, some of that darkness is down in our souls. Am I saying you're a dark evil person?

888
00:45:05.440 --> 00:45:11.660
No, I'm saying that the dark areas are our trauma the wounds things that we can't even see

889
00:45:11.800 --> 00:45:14.800
We don't even know sometimes why we're doing what we're doing

890
00:45:15.000 --> 00:45:16.940
God knows the why behind the what

891
00:45:17.880 --> 00:45:23.200
Trust what he brings up lean into the holy spirit and then pull the thread. What do I mean by that?

892
00:45:23.400 --> 00:45:28.300
What I mean is that if you have a memory that comes up even if you don't understand it ask the lord like

893
00:45:28.300 --> 00:45:30.020
Lord, what are you trying to show me?

894
00:45:30.580 --> 00:45:32.560
I haven't thought about this thing in forever

895
00:45:33.400 --> 00:45:37.420
But lord, this is coming up or an image or a phrase or you know

896
00:45:37.420 --> 00:45:40.760
This is where we pull the thread and then we see what god reveals

897
00:45:41.300 --> 00:45:45.960
Next and that we'll love for you to share what god has put on your heart to share for tonight

898
00:45:45.960 --> 00:45:49.060
And then we're going to get ready for breakout groups here shortly

899
00:45:51.260 --> 00:45:52.860
Okay, thanks bethany

900
00:45:53.960 --> 00:45:56.900
um something that I wanted to share that came up is

901
00:45:56.900 --> 00:46:03.380
Actually really recent. Uh, i've been married for about a year and a half

902
00:46:04.500 --> 00:46:05.220
um

903
00:46:05.220 --> 00:46:05.940
and

904
00:46:06.160 --> 00:46:15.220
We got married in april of 24 and in january when we were dating when I was praying. I really felt like god was saying

905
00:46:15.340 --> 00:46:18.100
Our relationship was not going to look like the

906
00:46:18.900 --> 00:46:19.620
traditional

907
00:46:20.060 --> 00:46:22.100
relationship or what I expected

908
00:46:22.660 --> 00:46:24.720
And I was like, okay

909
00:46:25.300 --> 00:46:26.160
I gotcha

910
00:46:26.160 --> 00:46:29.500
I got you god, whatever whatever it looks like. Okay

911
00:46:30.020 --> 00:46:31.360
well, then

912
00:46:32.020 --> 00:46:32.980
um

913
00:46:32.980 --> 00:46:33.760
He's from canada

914
00:46:34.200 --> 00:46:35.160
i'm

915
00:46:35.160 --> 00:46:37.140
in the us obviously

916
00:46:37.780 --> 00:46:42.420
And so our relationship really hasn't looked

917
00:46:43.140 --> 00:46:49.220
Like a traditional relationship. Uh, we got married. We've been working on his green card since

918
00:46:49.800 --> 00:46:50.760
um

919
00:46:50.760 --> 00:46:52.900
May of 24

920
00:46:52.920 --> 00:46:58.240
We have probably about another six months to go which means we don't live

921
00:46:58.260 --> 00:46:59.880
in the same place

922
00:46:59.880 --> 00:47:02.000
He lives in canada

923
00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:05.300
Travels back and forth to visit. I live here

924
00:47:05.300 --> 00:47:10.080
In fact just got home about an hour and a half before getting on the call tonight

925
00:47:10.080 --> 00:47:15.040
To go up to visit him because yesterday was our two-year anniversary of our first date

926
00:47:15.040 --> 00:47:20.880
Um, I know if you're doing the math that's fast, but we knew it and god confirmed it so

927
00:47:21.860 --> 00:47:22.500
um

928
00:47:22.860 --> 00:47:25.880
And I remember he also

929
00:47:26.400 --> 00:47:30.280
Is on a tv show which is really god's provision

930
00:47:30.640 --> 00:47:32.280
But it's up in canada

931
00:47:32.380 --> 00:47:38.940
And so it affects the days that he can come down because as some of you who've been on the calls before know

932
00:47:38.940 --> 00:47:41.020
He's a retired firefighter

933
00:47:41.020 --> 00:47:46.920
So I was like, okay great. He can just be down in washington as much as he needs to be so we can see each other

934
00:47:47.660 --> 00:47:50.940
Um, but god has had other plans and other ways

935
00:47:51.340 --> 00:47:52.340
and so

936
00:47:53.020 --> 00:47:55.640
He has dates that he has to be

937
00:47:56.020 --> 00:47:59.560
uh up in canada for the filming of this show

938
00:48:00.220 --> 00:48:05.260
And we do not know until friday night of the week before

939
00:48:05.680 --> 00:48:07.920
What days it will be the next week

940
00:48:07.920 --> 00:48:10.960
And we don't know he doesn't know the times

941
00:48:11.520 --> 00:48:15.000
Until the night before sometime after 9 p.m

942
00:48:16.040 --> 00:48:16.640
and

943
00:48:16.880 --> 00:48:18.920
I'm kind of a schedule girl

944
00:48:18.980 --> 00:48:21.100
So I like to know

945
00:48:21.120 --> 00:48:24.080
When he's coming and what I can look forward to

946
00:48:24.780 --> 00:48:29.040
You know it if he leaves or if I leave canada and I think okay, it's

947
00:48:29.740 --> 00:48:31.800
10 days until I get to see you again

948
00:48:32.320 --> 00:48:36.120
I never have that assurance because we don't know his schedule

949
00:48:37.000 --> 00:48:39.780
And for the first few months

950
00:48:40.100 --> 00:48:43.480
Of our relationship. I really struggled with that

951
00:48:44.320 --> 00:48:48.600
Really struggled and it was like, okay god, we're married and we can't

952
00:48:49.900 --> 00:48:52.740
I don't know when he's coming. I don't know

953
00:48:53.080 --> 00:48:57.500
When i'm going to be able to go up there. How long is this going to last we went?

954
00:48:59.320 --> 00:48:59.860
uh

955
00:48:59.860 --> 00:49:03.320
16 months without hearing anything about his green card

956
00:49:03.320 --> 00:49:10.520
He's been stopped at the border and turned away and not allowed into the u.s. So many things so many things

957
00:49:12.720 --> 00:49:13.240
um

958
00:49:13.240 --> 00:49:18.000
But when I finally was able to step back and it was on my jesus cares board

959
00:49:18.840 --> 00:49:22.820
Because I was struggling with it so much and I really asked god to come

960
00:49:22.840 --> 00:49:24.300
And give me peace

961
00:49:24.500 --> 00:49:29.000
and and it was like I sat down in a chair next to god and he was like

962
00:49:29.740 --> 00:49:30.260
so

963
00:49:31.760 --> 00:49:38.280
When are you just going to know that I see you that I love you that I have the best in mind

964
00:49:38.420 --> 00:49:39.800
I've brought you guys together

965
00:49:40.260 --> 00:49:43.700
I know what i'm doing and it's all for your good

966
00:49:43.880 --> 00:49:46.720
It was it was like that was the conversation

967
00:49:47.220 --> 00:49:51.600
And when I finally let it sink down in I really have stepped into

968
00:49:51.860 --> 00:49:55.860
So much peace and so much freedom in surrendering

969
00:49:56.100 --> 00:49:59.980
He gave me what I prayed for he gave me what I asked for he gave me

970
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:04.100
a husband, that loves me and cares for me and wants to

971
00:50:04.100 --> 00:50:07.900
provide for us. And I was holding on to it so tight,

972
00:50:08.360 --> 00:50:12.460
because it didn't look how I thought it was going to look.

973
00:50:12.860 --> 00:50:18.120
But there was so much freedom and peace. Also for Arthur,

974
00:50:18.200 --> 00:50:21.300
because he wasn't listening to a wife that was like, I don't get

975
00:50:21.300 --> 00:50:27.140
to see you again, you know, we had plans. But when I was able

976
00:50:27.140 --> 00:50:32.360
to just say, Okay, God, you gave this to me, and I'm giving it

977
00:50:32.360 --> 00:50:37.200
back to you. And I want it to look and be how you want it to

978
00:50:37.200 --> 00:50:41.740
look. Not my idea. I'm not the one that sits on the throne of

979
00:50:41.740 --> 00:50:46.440
my life. You are forgive me for holding on so tightly to what

980
00:50:46.440 --> 00:50:52.380
you gave me. I release it all to you. And it has really

981
00:50:52.380 --> 00:50:59.940
blanketed me with peace. You know, I, I, I can describe it

982
00:50:59.940 --> 00:51:04.160
just as a peace and a reassurance in knowing when

983
00:51:04.160 --> 00:51:07.780
plans change quickly, and, you know, he was going to come down,

984
00:51:07.940 --> 00:51:11.880
but he can't or I was going to go up. Or sometimes it's like a

985
00:51:11.880 --> 00:51:15.420
hug from heaven when, you know, he's like, I got wrapped, I get

986
00:51:15.420 --> 00:51:18.240
to come down. There's they just called me off, you know, so

987
00:51:18.240 --> 00:51:21.120
he's coming down for three days. It's great when those things

988
00:51:21.120 --> 00:51:25.440
happen, and they go how I how I don't expect. But I need to know

989
00:51:25.440 --> 00:51:28.540
that God's the God that's in control, even when it doesn't

990
00:51:28.540 --> 00:51:32.360
go how I expect. And the only person I need to trust and keep

991
00:51:32.360 --> 00:51:38.520
my eyes focused on is God. So that I think I covered

992
00:51:38.520 --> 00:51:43.600
everything I put in my notes, but surrender really is the best

993
00:51:44.580 --> 00:51:50.360
place. And God has shown that to me over and over again. I'm sure

994
00:51:50.360 --> 00:51:54.100
he'll have other ways and examples of how I can give

995
00:51:54.100 --> 00:51:58.980
things up as he continues to grow me in my heart and in my

996
00:51:58.980 --> 00:52:03.540
walk for him. But I'm thankful for that. And I'm thankful to be

997
00:52:03.540 --> 00:52:04.760
able to share it with all of you.

998
00:52:06.520 --> 00:52:10.060
So good. And it reminds me, you know, Jackie says all the time,

999
00:52:10.060 --> 00:52:13.580
it doesn't have to be easy. It just has to be worth it, ladies.

1000
00:52:14.460 --> 00:52:17.980
And you know where we decide it's worth it? In our hearts.

1001
00:52:19.480 --> 00:52:23.400
And that's not to say, hey, ladies, a toxic unhealthy

1002
00:52:23.400 --> 00:52:25.820
relationship that you're trying to shove it into the Hey, this

1003
00:52:25.820 --> 00:52:29.780
is worth it. I'm going to put up No, this isn't putting up with

1004
00:52:30.620 --> 00:52:33.920
toxic abuse and unhealthy behaviors. This is about when

1005
00:52:33.920 --> 00:52:38.320
God has brought things together. Even in the heartwork, he's

1006
00:52:38.320 --> 00:52:42.800
brought you here divinely doesn't have to be easy. It just

1007
00:52:42.800 --> 00:52:47.220
has to be worth it. So cling to that. And I've got your breakout

1008
00:52:47.220 --> 00:52:50.480
rooms ready. Here's your question. What are some things

1009
00:52:50.480 --> 00:52:54.080
God is nudging you to surrender to him tonight? So that's what

1010
00:52:54.080 --> 00:52:56.360
you're going to talk about. What are some things God is nudging

1011
00:52:56.420 --> 00:53:00.240
you to surrender to him tonight, I'm giving you all seven minutes

1012
00:53:00.240 --> 00:53:02.740
total, that gives you a little time to get in there and about

1013
00:53:02.740 --> 00:53:06.500
three minutes a piece to talk. Okay. All right, and then we'll

1014
00:53:06.500 --> 00:53:09.580
bring you all back. Go ahead and click that should be up on your

1015
00:53:09.580 --> 00:53:12.840
screen for you. And if you just joined recently, I had the rooms

1016
00:53:12.840 --> 00:53:16.880
already set. So I'll get you all situated Emily and kit here in

1017
00:53:16.880 --> 00:53:19.760
just a moment as people get into the rooms, go ahead and click to

1018
00:53:19.760 --> 00:53:25.240
join those ladies. Once I get them situated, I'll start to

1019
00:53:25.540 --> 00:53:30.760
pray. And that that was a great share. So good.

1020
00:53:35.240 --> 00:53:39.020
makes me think of to there's this song, your ways better that

1021
00:53:39.020 --> 00:53:41.640
kind of comes up in my spirit, too. I don't know if that's what

1022
00:53:41.640 --> 00:53:43.820
it's called. But that that comes up in my spirit.

1023
00:53:45.260 --> 00:53:49.500
A song we use for our wedding was God is in this story. And

1024
00:53:49.500 --> 00:53:51.500
that rings true so many times.

1025
00:53:55.000 --> 00:53:59.020
Totally. Sorry, I'm trying to see some people are by themselves

1026
00:53:59.060 --> 00:53:59.540
still

1027
00:54:09.780 --> 00:54:13.160
All right, Father, we just thank you, Lord, for continuing even

1028
00:54:13.160 --> 00:54:15.320
right now to help me get people situated.

1029
00:54:17.620 --> 00:54:20.960
Lord, thanks for grace, give them confidence and patience, even

1030
00:54:20.960 --> 00:54:24.460
as they're waiting to get put into rooms, where we thank you

1031
00:54:24.600 --> 00:54:27.280
that you're restoring all things

1032
00:54:30.680 --> 00:54:33.480
in us and through us, Lord, we thank you that you're revealing

1033
00:54:33.760 --> 00:54:37.560
areas for healing and redemption. We thank you God for

1034
00:54:37.560 --> 00:54:38.840
rewriting our stories.

1035
00:54:40.480 --> 00:54:44.480
How do you're the best storyteller. And we thank you

1036
00:54:44.480 --> 00:54:47.460
God that you know, you're not just a storyteller, but your

1037
00:54:47.460 --> 00:54:49.720
story writer. So Lord, we thank you that you're making

1038
00:54:51.280 --> 00:54:54.740
masterpieces out of areas that there have been messes in our

1039
00:54:54.740 --> 00:54:58.340
lives. And we thank you that you're helping us to receive

1040
00:54:58.340 --> 00:54:59.980
everything that you have for us, Laura.

1041
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:05.160
that all of the fullness of your blessings and your purposes and plans for us, God,

1042
00:55:05.180 --> 00:55:10.480
that you're continuing to unfold those in our lives. We thank you that you're continuing to

1043
00:55:10.480 --> 00:55:16.420
also help us to hear what your spirit is saying to us tonight. We thank you, God, that you would

1044
00:55:16.420 --> 00:55:22.380
help us to not partner with fear, which is false evidence appearing real, but that we would partner

1045
00:55:22.640 --> 00:55:28.620
with God that you're with us, that you're walking like literally side by side. You take us by the

1046
00:55:28.620 --> 00:55:36.820
hand and that you lead us into wide open pastures is what's coming to mind. But even in Psalm 23,

1047
00:55:37.040 --> 00:55:43.560
you know, he leads us besides still waters and that he can help us to lay down and rest. And

1048
00:55:43.560 --> 00:55:49.620
so, Lord, we just thank you for the reminder that you help us to rest in you. Even when we don't

1049
00:55:49.620 --> 00:55:55.480
know how to do that, God, you enable us to rest in your goodness and your truth and your life

1050
00:55:55.480 --> 00:56:03.540
and your hope. We thank you, Lord, for continuing to help us, Lord, to surrender every area. In

1051
00:56:03.540 --> 00:56:09.420
James 4, 7, it says this. So then surrender to God, stand up to the devil and resist him and he will

1052
00:56:09.420 --> 00:56:15.880
turn and run away from you. Praise the Lord. We can stand in authority. And ladies, here's the

1053
00:56:15.880 --> 00:56:21.480
thing. When we face hard times, we don't have to cower down to that stuff. We all face it. But

1054
00:56:21.480 --> 00:56:26.580
let's stand up and take every thought captive and make it obedient to Jesus Christ, to the word.

1055
00:56:27.160 --> 00:56:33.540
Let's apply the word of God to our lives and our situations and know that the enemy cannot

1056
00:56:33.540 --> 00:56:40.100
remain in the light. So he has to flee and that we can literally command him to go. Stacey,

1057
00:56:40.100 --> 00:56:44.980
hello. Welcome. Did you just join us or did you get kicked out of the breakout room?

1058
00:56:52.200 --> 00:56:56.100
All right. Alice said there was no one else in room 23.

1059
00:57:00.000 --> 00:57:04.140
Oh, shoot. Where's Alice? I'm going to put you in a different room.

1060
00:57:06.200 --> 00:57:12.340
Go ahead and click to join that. Sorry about that. I don't know if she just not didn't show up.

1061
00:57:13.120 --> 00:57:19.540
All right. Thanks for catching that. All right. Here's another one. Proverbs 3, 5 in the message

1062
00:57:19.540 --> 00:57:24.140
version says this. Trust God from the bottom of your heart. Don't try to figure out everything

1063
00:57:24.140 --> 00:57:34.120
on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go. He's the one who will

1064
00:57:34.120 --> 00:57:37.920
Lord, we thank you that you would help us to lay aside any pride,

1065
00:57:38.260 --> 00:57:43.740
any ego, even insecurity that causes us to try to run ahead of you, God.

1066
00:57:45.360 --> 00:57:50.140
Lord, we know that the enemy tries to come into the areas of weakness and struggle

1067
00:57:50.900 --> 00:57:56.600
and create just a vision within ourselves or doubting ourselves. And so we thank you for

1068
00:57:57.280 --> 00:58:01.520
just washing over everybody tonight. Those that are going to watch the replay as well

1069
00:58:01.520 --> 00:58:07.800
and just filling us afresh with your grace, with your peace, with discernment, with wisdom.

1070
00:58:08.040 --> 00:58:12.140
God, we thank you that you would help us to hear your voice behind us, telling us the way to go.

1071
00:58:12.320 --> 00:58:15.420
And God, we know that your word declares also that you're going to light a lamp

1072
00:58:15.940 --> 00:58:19.820
onto our feet and a light onto our path, that you're going to literally light it up for us.

1073
00:58:19.880 --> 00:58:25.060
So Lord, we thank you that we can trust you to guide us day by day by day closer

1074
00:58:25.580 --> 00:58:29.060
to the plans and the purposes that you have for us, God, that we can

1075
00:58:30.440 --> 00:58:36.620
humbly surrender to your will and to know that you have good things in store for us.

1076
00:58:36.660 --> 00:58:41.900
Isaiah 41.10 says, don't be afraid for I am with you. Don't be discouraged for I am your God.

1077
00:58:42.000 --> 00:58:47.860
I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

1078
00:58:49.560 --> 00:58:54.640
Second Timothy 1.7 says, for God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but a power

1079
00:58:54.640 --> 00:59:01.440
love and self-discipline. These are so good. I'm just going to keep reading. Galatians 6.9. So

1080
00:59:01.440 --> 00:59:07.380
let's not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time, we will reap a harvest of

1081
00:59:07.380 --> 00:59:14.160
blessing if we don't give up. Ladies, here's the real deal. We got to keep sowing seed and praying

1082
00:59:14.160 --> 00:59:20.420
into our spirit mate relationships. So even in our heart healing process, Lord, we thank you

1083
00:59:20.420 --> 00:59:26.660
that we won't get tired of believing that men are good. That even when we see men around us that

1084
00:59:26.660 --> 00:59:32.000
have not been good examples or even women around us that have not been healthy examples, God,

1085
00:59:32.040 --> 00:59:37.780
that we would choose to forgive and surrender those people to you and allow you to give us

1086
00:59:37.780 --> 00:59:44.020
a fresh revelation of the good men all around us, God, that you're leading us to see brothers in

1087
00:59:44.200 --> 00:59:51.320
that love you, that serve you, God, and we will continue to see your goodness and your glory

1088
00:59:51.400 --> 00:59:55.600
unfolding in our own lives, Lord, that we would see the good in ourselves, that we wouldn't look

1089
00:59:55.600 --> 00:59:59.280
in the mirror and always see what's wrong with us or the other people in our lives, but God,

1090
00:59:59.380 --> 00:59:59.980
that you would give us

1091
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:05.820
us a fresh revelation of how you see us and how you see other people. God, we thank you

1092
01:00:05.820 --> 01:00:11.540
that you are just continuing to refine us and lead us into all truth and anoint us for

1093
01:00:11.540 --> 01:00:16.560
all of our lives and walking calling and that you want to lead us deeper into Jesus today.

1094
01:00:16.560 --> 01:00:22.640
So give us a deeper understanding Jesus, help us to recognize where you are at, where you've

1095
01:00:22.640 --> 01:00:27.060
always been at, that you are the way, the truth and the life, that there's no other

1096
01:00:27.060 --> 01:00:31.880
way to get to the Father except through you. So Jesus, help us to come into a closer friendship

1097
01:00:31.880 --> 01:00:38.820
with you tonight and to receive an upgrade in the way that we view just even your time

1098
01:00:38.820 --> 01:00:43.820
here on earth, that even you, Jesus, had to choose to love your enemies and those who

1099
01:00:44.080 --> 01:00:48.460
have spitefully used you. And we just thank you that you're the example that we have to

1100
01:00:48.980 --> 01:00:54.600
follow. And we thank you that Psalm 1-3 is God's truth for us. Again, tonight he will

1101
01:00:54.600 --> 01:00:59.380
be standing firm like a flourishing tree, planted by God's design, deeply rooted by

1102
01:00:59.380 --> 01:01:04.860
the brooks of bliss, bearing fruit in every season of his life. He is never dry, never

1103
01:01:04.860 --> 01:01:10.460
fainting, ever blessed, ever prosperous. Ladies, that is our, that is God's plan for us, that

1104
01:01:10.460 --> 01:01:15.920
we would prosper in all things at all times under any kind of pressure. And so I don't

1105
01:01:15.920 --> 01:01:20.640
know about you all, but the last few weeks have been tough. Praise the Lord that no matter

1106
01:01:20.640 --> 01:01:25.260
what we're going through, that God can bring glory and goodness out of us. Praise the Lord.

1107
01:01:25.580 --> 01:01:29.900
Welcome back, ladies. So glad to have you coming back. Hope you had a great conversation

1108
01:01:29.900 --> 01:01:34.100
in your breakout. Sorry, some of y'all, I think people were leaving as I was trying

1109
01:01:34.100 --> 01:01:38.820
to move rooms around. So hopefully you were able to still share if you were waiting to

1110
01:01:38.820 --> 01:01:42.740
get put into a room. I trust that God will give you everything that you need no matter

1111
01:01:42.740 --> 01:01:48.820
what. Here are the activations for this week. Permission slip. Y'all, this was in week one.

1112
01:01:50.940 --> 01:01:55.580
Even if you've already done it, I want you to get that back out. Get the one you filled

1113
01:01:55.560 --> 01:02:00.540
out. But if you haven't done it yet, fill it out, print it out, fill it out, hang them

1114
01:02:00.540 --> 01:02:05.500
up where you can see them every day, ladies. I want you to pray them out loud, the prayer

1115
01:02:05.500 --> 01:02:10.280
that's on the permission slip. I want you to pray that out loud over yourself daily,

1116
01:02:11.160 --> 01:02:15.680
preferably twice a day. If you remember, this isn't a religious thing, though. OK, so this

1117
01:02:15.680 --> 01:02:20.340
is just just something to recommend because it's going to help you partner with that surrender

1118
01:02:20.340 --> 01:02:24.900
every day. Jesus cares board. If you haven't done that, start working on that. Post a picture

1119
01:02:24.900 --> 01:02:28.900
of it in the group. Let us see how it's going. Because, ladies, sometimes we're going to

1120
01:02:28.900 --> 01:02:33.560
see things on your Jesus cares board and already be able to start praying for you and and partnering

1121
01:02:33.560 --> 01:02:37.500
with you. God might give us a word for you as we read that and see that. And then here's

1122
01:02:37.500 --> 01:02:40.440
number three, and I'm going to put these in the group. I do want to apologize. I forgot

1123
01:02:40.440 --> 01:02:44.220
to put the activation thing up last week. I'm so sorry, ladies. For those of you that

1124
01:02:44.220 --> 01:02:50.940
don't know, we've been all in flux in my world. So we've been out of our house for quite

1125
01:02:50.940 --> 01:02:55.160
some time, moving from hotel to hotel. We were traveling. So apologize. I did not put

1126
01:02:55.160 --> 01:02:59.340
those in there, but I will be putting those up tonight as soon as we get off so that I

1127
01:02:59.340 --> 01:03:06.700
don't forget. But here's number three. Morning and evening surrender moments in the morning

1128
01:03:06.700 --> 01:03:12.160
before you get out of bed. I'm really big on connection. OK, so even when we pause and

1129
01:03:12.660 --> 01:03:17.000
just connect with our hearts, how are our hearts doing? Y'all, I recommend that totally

1130
01:03:17.220 --> 01:03:21.320
side note. But just there's something about that. But before you get out of bed, placing

1131
01:03:21.320 --> 01:03:28.160
your hand on your heart and asking, Holy Spirit, what am I trying to control today that belongs

1132
01:03:28.160 --> 01:03:35.700
to you? Then speak it out. I surrender my need to control fill in the blank today in

1133
01:03:35.700 --> 01:03:40.800
the evening before you go to sleep. Same hand on your heart posture. Ask, what did

1134
01:03:40.800 --> 01:03:47.160
I pick back up today that I had given to you, Lord? Then re-surrender it. Jesus, I place

1135
01:03:47.360 --> 01:03:53.680
whatever it is back in your hands and really connecting with your heart in that process.

1136
01:03:53.600 --> 01:04:01.500
OK? Awesome. Y'all got the activations. Nadine is ready to go. Let me hear what you have

1137
01:04:01.500 --> 01:04:11.440
to say. Oh, are we going straight into the? Yes, ma'am. OK, I just want to make sure.

1138
01:04:11.340 --> 01:04:17.740
Sorry. Well, I had two things that I feel like the Lord has put on heavy for me to surrender.

1139
01:04:17.980 --> 01:04:23.740
And I think somehow they may work together, but I really can't see it. And I think the

1140
01:04:23.740 --> 01:04:29.580
first one is my son. You know, he goes back and forth between his dad and my house. And

1141
01:04:29.580 --> 01:04:34.100
so like even last night, I saw he was playing a game that I've already talked to him about.

1142
01:04:34.620 --> 01:04:39.300
I'm like, this is demonic. This is opening doors that I'm shutting every day. And it

1143
01:04:39.300 --> 01:04:44.800
just led me into prayer. But like a lot of like tears because I'm like, Lord, like this

1144
01:04:44.800 --> 01:04:49.060
is not from you. Like, why does this keep happening if I'm praying and I'm trying to

1145
01:04:49.060 --> 01:04:54.160
trust you? So I think there's so much with with my son. And there's a few things that

1146
01:04:54.160 --> 01:04:59.980
you mentioned. And I was like, oh, I'm overcompensating. That's what's happening. And then I this.

1147
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:01.980
This is a really weird, but like today,

1148
01:05:02.460 --> 01:05:05.460
I was dropping a package off at UPS

1149
01:05:05.640 --> 01:05:08.720
and I saw these two kids that were by themselves.

1150
01:05:08.860 --> 01:05:09.900
I don't think they were by themselves.

1151
01:05:10.100 --> 01:05:11.720
I think they were with their dad,

1152
01:05:11.840 --> 01:05:14.160
that their dad was nowhere to be found.

1153
01:05:14.820 --> 01:05:17.880
And like, I was starting to panic for them

1154
01:05:18.500 --> 01:05:20.620
because I was just thinking like,

1155
01:05:20.620 --> 01:05:21.840
danger alert, danger alert.

1156
01:05:23.620 --> 01:05:25.960
And when I first joined the community,

1157
01:05:25.960 --> 01:05:28.240
I shared a little bit of my testimony

1158
01:05:28.240 --> 01:05:30.520
where I was like hearing all the different voices

1159
01:05:30.520 --> 01:05:33.180
and then driving and doing all the things and finding.

1160
01:05:33.700 --> 01:05:37.140
But one of the things that kind of sparked that situation

1161
01:05:37.140 --> 01:05:40.040
was that the Lord had asked me to apply

1162
01:05:40.340 --> 01:05:42.440
to a nonprofit organization

1163
01:05:42.480 --> 01:05:44.760
for human sex trafficking victims.

1164
01:05:44.880 --> 01:05:47.380
And so when I didn't get that job,

1165
01:05:47.480 --> 01:05:49.540
somehow the enemy got my mind to think,

1166
01:05:50.080 --> 01:05:51.960
well, I know that sounds crazy ladies,

1167
01:05:52.080 --> 01:05:54.860
but this is genuinely where my mind was at,

1168
01:05:55.600 --> 01:05:58.780
that I had to rescue human sex trafficking victims.

1169
01:05:59.000 --> 01:06:00.240
Like that's what the Lord was doing,

1170
01:06:00.420 --> 01:06:02.580
literally sending me out to the fields

1171
01:06:03.660 --> 01:06:05.140
to like be there for them.

1172
01:06:05.240 --> 01:06:08.580
So anyways, when I saw the two kids today,

1173
01:06:08.580 --> 01:06:10.600
I kind of just paused in my car

1174
01:06:10.600 --> 01:06:11.740
because I was like, okay, Lord.

1175
01:06:11.800 --> 01:06:12.580
And I was just praying.

1176
01:06:12.720 --> 01:06:15.320
I was like, send their parents, cover them.

1177
01:06:15.380 --> 01:06:17.660
But it didn't, I left feeling uneasy.

1178
01:06:17.780 --> 01:06:18.820
And then as I was leaving,

1179
01:06:18.880 --> 01:06:23.800
I just felt just really like a spirit of fear

1180
01:06:23.800 --> 01:06:25.000
and intimidation.

1181
01:06:26.240 --> 01:06:28.220
And then as I was driving home,

1182
01:06:28.600 --> 01:06:30.940
like I had this thought

1183
01:06:30.940 --> 01:06:32.780
and this is where I struggle sometimes

1184
01:06:32.780 --> 01:06:35.000
with I'm like, Lord, is this you or is this not

1185
01:06:35.120 --> 01:06:38.200
to stop at a specific place,

1186
01:06:38.860 --> 01:06:40.560
which I just, I didn't do.

1187
01:06:40.700 --> 01:06:43.040
I went home because it reminded me of that situation.

1188
01:06:44.820 --> 01:06:47.940
So yes, I have a lot of thoughts

1189
01:06:48.180 --> 01:06:50.880
about my, like my son going missing.

1190
01:06:51.800 --> 01:06:57.000
And so I don't know if somehow it's tied together.

1191
01:06:58.640 --> 01:07:02.360
Yeah, so, hey, I think that probably

1192
01:07:02.480 --> 01:07:04.020
they're linking together.

1193
01:07:04.740 --> 01:07:07.920
The one thing I wanna say is there's two things

1194
01:07:07.920 --> 01:07:10.760
that stand out to me is that you could have

1195
01:07:10.920 --> 01:07:14.580
just a high level of a protector in you, okay?

1196
01:07:14.760 --> 01:07:17.620
So some people do have like just this,

1197
01:07:17.620 --> 01:07:21.300
they feel this drive to protect people,

1198
01:07:21.980 --> 01:07:24.900
but it could be just out of balance right now.

1199
01:07:25.320 --> 01:07:27.760
So overextended, which would be why

1200
01:07:27.760 --> 01:07:29.960
as soon as you saw those two kids by yourself

1201
01:07:29.960 --> 01:07:31.620
that you thought the worst.

1202
01:07:32.040 --> 01:07:33.940
Now, depending on how old they are,

1203
01:07:34.100 --> 01:07:36.460
I think maybe most people might be like,

1204
01:07:36.600 --> 01:07:37.800
hey, we're the parents,

1205
01:07:38.120 --> 01:07:40.740
but it sounds like that's kind of an overdrive

1206
01:07:40.740 --> 01:07:42.380
for you right now.

1207
01:07:42.980 --> 01:07:47.380
And so if you felt a spirit of fear,

1208
01:07:48.060 --> 01:07:50.980
remember that fear is false evidence appearing real.

1209
01:07:51.060 --> 01:07:53.520
And it's a lot of times fueled by anxiety.

1210
01:07:53.840 --> 01:07:55.620
What if this, what if that, what if this,

1211
01:07:56.180 --> 01:07:59.020
and the Lord's just trying to assault us

1212
01:07:59.020 --> 01:08:02.220
with that anxiety and fear to get us kind of

1213
01:08:02.220 --> 01:08:04.780
out of our actual focus in that place of peace.

1214
01:08:06.500 --> 01:08:11.380
But the way that we can counteract that is love.

1215
01:08:11.380 --> 01:08:14.440
When we are rooted and grounded in love,

1216
01:08:14.900 --> 01:08:16.220
love cast out all fear.

1217
01:08:16.920 --> 01:08:19.479
And so I wanna encourage you or anyone else

1218
01:08:19.479 --> 01:08:21.960
that really battles with fear or anxiety,

1219
01:08:21.960 --> 01:08:23.580
or even these kind of fearful,

1220
01:08:23.979 --> 01:08:28.460
evil kind of foreboding kind of thoughts is to,

1221
01:08:29.160 --> 01:08:33.060
okay, Lord, like your word says that love casts out fear.

1222
01:08:33.180 --> 01:08:34.479
And right now I feel fear.

1223
01:08:34.560 --> 01:08:38.600
So help me to reconnect with your love.

1224
01:08:38.660 --> 01:08:40.740
You're not actually disconnected from it,

1225
01:08:40.740 --> 01:08:44.240
but it's just in that moment when we partner with fear

1226
01:08:44.240 --> 01:08:46.040
and we start kind of thinking on that

1227
01:08:46.040 --> 01:08:47.300
and going down that trail,

1228
01:08:47.920 --> 01:08:50.939
it can start to cause us to, just like a kid.

1229
01:08:51.000 --> 01:08:53.160
If you think about it, when a parent is holding that kid,

1230
01:08:53.319 --> 01:08:55.060
they're embraced, they feel that love.

1231
01:08:55.200 --> 01:08:58.620
But if they start to wander away a little bit, right?

1232
01:08:59.200 --> 01:09:01.740
That kid isn't in that embrace right in that moment.

1233
01:09:01.920 --> 01:09:04.560
They're still loved, but they're not in that embrace.

1234
01:09:04.680 --> 01:09:06.340
And so what I wanna encourage you to do

1235
01:09:06.340 --> 01:09:09.760
is kind of come back into that embrace and ask the Lord,

1236
01:09:09.760 --> 01:09:12.140
okay, what's really the root here?

1237
01:09:12.760 --> 01:09:14.200
Is it that, you know,

1238
01:09:14.200 --> 01:09:16.840
I'm afraid that bad things are gonna happen to my son,

1239
01:09:16.899 --> 01:09:17.680
someone's gonna take him,

1240
01:09:17.760 --> 01:09:20.680
he's gonna watch this video, he's gonna turn out bad.

1241
01:09:21.540 --> 01:09:24.760
Like all of that surrendering the outcome.

1242
01:09:26.500 --> 01:09:29.500
Ladies, we do our best to train up our kids

1243
01:09:29.500 --> 01:09:31.500
in the way that they should go

1244
01:09:32.939 --> 01:09:35.800
and trust that God will lead them in that

1245
01:09:35.800 --> 01:09:38.080
and protect that way we pray for them.

1246
01:09:39.120 --> 01:09:40.779
But again, we parent them,

1247
01:09:40.800 --> 01:09:43.120
you're doing the best that you can when he's with you,

1248
01:09:43.200 --> 01:09:46.060
when he's not with you, it's tough, you know?

1249
01:09:46.120 --> 01:09:47.380
Cause there's not as much,

1250
01:09:47.399 --> 01:09:48.920
it sounds like, you know, governance

1251
01:09:48.920 --> 01:09:51.200
or just watching things that he's doing,

1252
01:09:52.120 --> 01:09:54.660
but continuing to surrender that to the Lord.

1253
01:09:55.240 --> 01:09:56.860
I forget, how old is your son?

1254
01:09:56.940 --> 01:09:58.300
He's young still, right?

1255
01:09:59.140 --> 01:09:59.980
He's about to be 11.

1256
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:00.720
11 in November.

1257
01:10:00.820 --> 01:10:01.460
11.

1258
01:10:02.120 --> 01:10:05.980
All right, so I would pray for the Lord

1259
01:10:05.980 --> 01:10:10.160
to start really convicting him.

1260
01:10:11.080 --> 01:10:12.580
That's what I pray, so bad.

1261
01:10:13.160 --> 01:10:15.800
For the games, and help him to see

1262
01:10:15.800 --> 01:10:17.600
that it's not good for himself.

1263
01:10:17.780 --> 01:10:22.240
Because even at 11, they can make healthy choices.

1264
01:10:23.220 --> 01:10:25.200
The temptation's pretty severe,

1265
01:10:25.380 --> 01:10:26.780
because friends and all these people

1266
01:10:26.780 --> 01:10:27.640
are playing these things.

1267
01:10:27.640 --> 01:10:31.420
But that doesn't mean that they can't also be impacted

1268
01:10:31.420 --> 01:10:33.620
by the spirit, even in their sleep.

1269
01:10:33.640 --> 01:10:38.320
So I pray for God to encounter my kids in their sleep.

1270
01:10:38.480 --> 01:10:42.020
I want them to have an encounter and a revelation of Jesus.

1271
01:10:42.240 --> 01:10:45.400
And if they're struggling to receive that in the daytime,

1272
01:10:45.400 --> 01:10:46.700
because their minds are going,

1273
01:10:46.900 --> 01:10:49.880
or they're just invaded with social media.

1274
01:10:50.240 --> 01:10:51.380
Mikayla, my oldest daughter,

1275
01:10:51.740 --> 01:10:55.200
she watches so many videos and things online

1276
01:10:55.200 --> 01:10:57.420
that it literally increases her anxiety.

1277
01:10:57.420 --> 01:10:59.000
And I think her eating disorder.

1278
01:10:59.460 --> 01:11:00.920
And so I just keep praying,

1279
01:11:01.140 --> 01:11:02.520
like, God, just meet her in her sleep.

1280
01:11:02.700 --> 01:11:04.440
Just come in and just minister.

1281
01:11:04.720 --> 01:11:07.020
Like, I just, I mean, I pray all kinds of things.

1282
01:11:07.020 --> 01:11:08.680
But hopefully that encourages you too.

1283
01:11:08.800 --> 01:11:11.740
But just keep doing what you're doing.

1284
01:11:11.840 --> 01:11:14.080
It sounds like you're doing your best,

1285
01:11:14.240 --> 01:11:15.260
being a good influence.

1286
01:11:15.540 --> 01:11:19.000
But let's find out where this root is coming from.

1287
01:11:20.300 --> 01:11:23.220
All right, and make sure that when that's kicking in,

1288
01:11:23.240 --> 01:11:25.560
that you, again, come back into that embrace.

1289
01:11:26.080 --> 01:11:29.440
And remember who your dad is.

1290
01:11:31.320 --> 01:11:33.560
He's the creator of everything.

1291
01:11:35.260 --> 01:11:36.260
Nothing's hard for him.

1292
01:11:37.540 --> 01:11:40.440
It's hard for us, but it's not hard for him.

1293
01:11:41.340 --> 01:11:42.840
And just keep partnering with that.

1294
01:11:42.960 --> 01:11:44.220
But keep us updated on that.

1295
01:11:44.640 --> 01:11:45.920
And we'll be like, I'm gonna,

1296
01:11:46.060 --> 01:11:48.080
what is your first, your son's first name?

1297
01:11:49.080 --> 01:11:49.460
Orion.

1298
01:11:50.620 --> 01:11:52.120
Orion, ooh, I love that name.

1299
01:11:53.880 --> 01:11:54.980
Ooh, all right.

1300
01:11:56.340 --> 01:11:57.260
Thank you.

1301
01:11:57.260 --> 01:11:58.720
I'm gonna be praying for him this week.

1302
01:11:59.560 --> 01:11:59.820
Thank you.

1303
01:12:00.320 --> 01:12:01.720
You're welcome, you're welcome.

1304
01:12:01.720 --> 01:12:02.780
Alexandra, go ahead.

1305
01:12:04.520 --> 01:12:05.740
Okay, hey, Bethany.

1306
01:12:06.300 --> 01:12:06.820
Hi.

1307
01:12:08.900 --> 01:12:12.560
So I had a couple of things that I wanted to get your help,

1308
01:12:12.660 --> 01:12:14.740
or I need to surrender and wanted to share.

1309
01:12:15.120 --> 01:12:17.480
I also, I could share this maybe in the winds,

1310
01:12:17.640 --> 01:12:19.480
but I found this prophetic word

1311
01:12:19.480 --> 01:12:22.620
that I got from probably like eight months ago.

1312
01:12:22.620 --> 01:12:25.860
And it's about, it's basically here now with y'all

1313
01:12:25.860 --> 01:12:27.580
and what you're doing for us.

1314
01:12:27.680 --> 01:12:29.540
And so I didn't know if I could share.

1315
01:12:30.140 --> 01:12:31.180
Yeah, you can, sure.

1316
01:12:33.080 --> 01:12:34.780
And they don't even know me.

1317
01:12:34.880 --> 01:12:35.780
I didn't know this person.

1318
01:12:35.940 --> 01:12:37.480
They just knew I was coming to the retreat.

1319
01:12:38.100 --> 01:12:40.440
It said, find your Aaron and Er.

1320
01:12:40.520 --> 01:12:42.500
You have some battles ahead of you,

1321
01:12:42.640 --> 01:12:46.520
ones that will result in deep freedom, healing, wholeness.

1322
01:12:46.940 --> 01:12:47.240
Sorry.

1323
01:12:50.620 --> 01:12:54.000
It's kind of crazy when stuff like actually happens.

1324
01:12:55.300 --> 01:12:57.360
Anyway, so it'll result in deep freedom,

1325
01:12:58.100 --> 01:12:58.780
healing and wholeness.

1326
01:12:59.320 --> 01:13:01.560
Victory is certain when you raise your hands

1327
01:13:01.720 --> 01:13:03.360
in prayer and worship.

1328
01:13:04.240 --> 01:13:06.020
Note, you will need a couple of friends

1329
01:13:06.020 --> 01:13:09.520
to hold your arms up when you get discouraged, tired.

1330
01:13:10.660 --> 01:13:11.740
Yeah, sorry.

1331
01:13:12.040 --> 01:13:13.100
Worn out in the battle.

1332
01:13:13.880 --> 01:13:15.780
So I'm just grateful for y'all.

1333
01:13:16.540 --> 01:13:17.220
Thank you.

1334
01:13:17.220 --> 01:13:18.660
Thank you for sharing that with us.

1335
01:13:18.680 --> 01:13:19.340
That's a blessing.

1336
01:13:19.480 --> 01:13:21.320
We're so glad you're a part of our family.

1337
01:13:22.240 --> 01:13:25.060
We're honored to get to walk in this journey with you.

1338
01:13:26.100 --> 01:13:27.120
Yeah, thank you.

1339
01:13:27.660 --> 01:13:28.920
I'm just, yeah, I'm super grateful.

1340
01:13:29.120 --> 01:13:31.660
It's hard to find the healing that y'all have here,

1341
01:13:33.320 --> 01:13:35.220
but yeah, so it's kind of cool

1342
01:13:35.220 --> 01:13:37.320
to see the prophetic word coming.

1343
01:13:37.460 --> 01:13:40.940
This is, I see that coming to fruition here.

1344
01:13:40.940 --> 01:13:42.080
So it was very cool.

1345
01:13:43.040 --> 01:13:43.940
I love that.

1346
01:13:45.100 --> 01:13:49.500
Yeah, so, and I believe, yeah,

1347
01:13:49.500 --> 01:13:51.620
whoever else wants to pick that up, it's all of ours.

1348
01:13:52.320 --> 01:13:56.460
I guess, you know, but let's see.

1349
01:13:57.560 --> 01:14:00.300
So surrendering, I did decide to sell my house

1350
01:14:00.320 --> 01:14:02.720
after I asked you for support in that.

1351
01:14:03.200 --> 01:14:04.180
Oh, okay.

1352
01:14:05.300 --> 01:14:08.500
So that's been a couple of years I wanted to,

1353
01:14:08.660 --> 01:14:09.800
and it's just a battle.

1354
01:14:09.800 --> 01:14:12.440
So, and I'm excited.

1355
01:14:13.020 --> 01:14:16.040
You know, I think the, anyway, but so I'm trying,

1356
01:14:16.160 --> 01:14:18.600
I have plans, I have to figure out the dates.

1357
01:14:18.660 --> 01:14:19.860
I've met with a realtor,

1358
01:14:20.200 --> 01:14:24.300
but like finding an apartment that I can afford

1359
01:14:24.840 --> 01:14:28.180
is like in my vision, in my view, I'm like,

1360
01:14:28.380 --> 01:14:30.000
you know, I've got two dogs and I'm like,

1361
01:14:30.000 --> 01:14:31.920
this just isn't, you know, in my view,

1362
01:14:31.940 --> 01:14:33.060
I'm like, this can't happen.

1363
01:14:33.800 --> 01:14:36.680
So I've been spinning my wheels a lot

1364
01:14:36.680 --> 01:14:38.240
and I keep trying, like you said,

1365
01:14:38.240 --> 01:14:39.880
it's like every morning I probably need

1366
01:14:39.880 --> 01:14:44.420
to keep resubmitting this because in my vision,

1367
01:14:45.060 --> 01:14:46.860
and when I talked to my mom, it's like,

1368
01:14:47.160 --> 01:14:49.420
there's like nothing for that price here

1369
01:14:50.080 --> 01:14:51.120
and blah, blah, blah.

1370
01:14:51.140 --> 01:14:52.700
But I'm like, I have no other option.

1371
01:14:52.820 --> 01:14:54.360
Like, this is how much money I make.

1372
01:14:54.480 --> 01:14:56.380
This is like what my expenses are.

1373
01:14:56.380 --> 01:14:58.500
And I need to, I really want to move out of the house.

1374
01:14:58.560 --> 01:14:59.880
So I've got to trust God.

1375
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:04.300
and that, that he can provide an apartment for me.

1376
01:15:04.460 --> 01:15:07.080
And it's kind of a risk because I have to sell my house

1377
01:15:07.260 --> 01:15:10.320
and like once it's sold, I have to live somewhere, so.

1378
01:15:11.040 --> 01:15:11.640
Yes.

1379
01:15:12.780 --> 01:15:13.380
Yeah.

1380
01:15:14.400 --> 01:15:16.800
Well, I'm so excited for you

1381
01:15:16.820 --> 01:15:19.000
that you are making this decision.

1382
01:15:19.120 --> 01:15:21.680
I think that you're gonna just really feel

1383
01:15:21.680 --> 01:15:24.940
a lot of freedom once everything kind of gets settled.

1384
01:15:25.560 --> 01:15:28.560
The one thing I wanna say is to encourage you.

1385
01:15:28.560 --> 01:15:32.500
So when I was, we weren't even engaged yet,

1386
01:15:32.500 --> 01:15:35.120
but God led me to move to Indiana

1387
01:15:35.420 --> 01:15:38.540
so that Brian and I could date more in person.

1388
01:15:39.120 --> 01:15:43.840
And I needed an apartment that didn't have a 12 month lease.

1389
01:15:44.040 --> 01:15:46.720
And I know that might sound like super easy to find,

1390
01:15:47.020 --> 01:15:47.920
but y'all it's not.

1391
01:15:49.060 --> 01:15:52.300
I needed a safe, let me say that,

1392
01:15:52.680 --> 01:15:55.840
a nice safe apartment that did month to month

1393
01:15:56.460 --> 01:15:58.700
or like short-term leases or whatever.

1394
01:15:59.340 --> 01:16:01.800
And I kept calling apartments and they didn't have it,

1395
01:16:01.840 --> 01:16:02.540
they didn't have it.

1396
01:16:02.540 --> 01:16:04.860
And I kind of felt like how you're saying,

1397
01:16:05.020 --> 01:16:07.160
like, I don't know if this is even possible.

1398
01:16:07.440 --> 01:16:09.180
And the reason I wanted the short-term lease

1399
01:16:09.180 --> 01:16:14.520
is because I wanted to like move forward

1400
01:16:14.520 --> 01:16:15.960
and I thought we were gonna get engaged.

1401
01:16:16.040 --> 01:16:17.480
We weren't gonna get married that fast,

1402
01:16:17.520 --> 01:16:19.680
but just, I just didn't wanna get hung up

1403
01:16:19.680 --> 01:16:20.960
in a 12 month lease somewhere.

1404
01:16:21.200 --> 01:16:21.800
That's the point.

1405
01:16:22.760 --> 01:16:24.980
So anyways, I'm saying all that to say

1406
01:16:24.980 --> 01:16:27.420
that one day when I was talking

1407
01:16:27.420 --> 01:16:28.680
to one of these apartment places,

1408
01:16:28.840 --> 01:16:32.040
the Holy Spirit just said, ask them if they know anyone.

1409
01:16:33.040 --> 01:16:35.120
And so I did, and they're like,

1410
01:16:35.520 --> 01:16:37.860
yeah, this apartment place over here.

1411
01:16:38.440 --> 01:16:43.420
I called that apartment place and they had a waiting list,

1412
01:16:43.900 --> 01:16:46.640
but get this, the waiting list

1413
01:16:46.640 --> 01:16:48.280
was for the smoking apartments,

1414
01:16:48.400 --> 01:16:50.100
but because I didn't smoke,

1415
01:16:50.560 --> 01:16:53.040
y'all guess who got to go to the front of the line,

1416
01:16:53.040 --> 01:16:55.340
this girl, this girl did.

1417
01:16:56.080 --> 01:17:00.260
And so, yeah, I mean, it was a cute apartment.

1418
01:17:00.560 --> 01:17:01.540
It was perfect.

1419
01:17:01.680 --> 01:17:04.960
It wasn't super far, like 30 minutes from Brian.

1420
01:17:05.740 --> 01:17:11.500
It was in a fairly safe place, but it was perfect.

1421
01:17:11.740 --> 01:17:13.200
It had furniture in it.

1422
01:17:13.200 --> 01:17:16.500
So I could sell stuff that was in Kentucky.

1423
01:17:17.040 --> 01:17:19.060
And so I'm saying all that to say,

1424
01:17:19.960 --> 01:17:22.000
sometimes things for us can look impossible,

1425
01:17:22.000 --> 01:17:25.180
but God just needs to help you know the right place to call.

1426
01:17:26.360 --> 01:17:28.780
And who knows, it might even be just like,

1427
01:17:29.300 --> 01:17:31.200
you might find someone that's running,

1428
01:17:31.760 --> 01:17:34.240
wants to share their house or you just,

1429
01:17:34.520 --> 01:17:35.760
like God's super creative.

1430
01:17:36.120 --> 01:17:40.160
So just be open, just be open to where he leads you

1431
01:17:40.160 --> 01:17:42.320
and let's just see what he helps you find.

1432
01:17:43.200 --> 01:17:45.560
But who knows, you could even get a raise.

1433
01:17:45.660 --> 01:17:47.680
I mean, there's just so many things that could happen.

1434
01:17:47.760 --> 01:17:49.940
And so let's partner with God.

1435
01:17:50.320 --> 01:17:51.500
I trust that you're gonna provide

1436
01:17:51.500 --> 01:17:55.120
and you're gonna lead me and give me everything that I need.

1437
01:17:55.480 --> 01:17:59.160
You know, again, I feel like it's kind of back to that.

1438
01:17:59.780 --> 01:18:02.700
If I make this decision, I'm afraid it's the right one.

1439
01:18:02.700 --> 01:18:04.200
I feel like the enemy is trying to get you back

1440
01:18:04.200 --> 01:18:05.480
into that even a little bit.

1441
01:18:05.640 --> 01:18:08.400
And so where you can just stand in confidence,

1442
01:18:08.420 --> 01:18:11.320
like I've made this decision, I'm gonna be happy.

1443
01:18:11.400 --> 01:18:12.660
I'm gonna embrace it.

1444
01:18:12.660 --> 01:18:15.520
And I'm just gonna receive everything God has for me

1445
01:18:15.520 --> 01:18:16.340
in this process.

1446
01:18:16.840 --> 01:18:19.400
So keep partnering with those things as well.

1447
01:18:20.100 --> 01:18:20.420
Yeah.

1448
01:18:20.420 --> 01:18:23.300
And I agree, I think, yeah,

1449
01:18:23.600 --> 01:18:25.880
being open to different options is good too.

1450
01:18:26.820 --> 01:18:29.220
I think I'm trying to save money on top of it

1451
01:18:29.220 --> 01:18:31.220
and like not, because if I was gonna spend a lot of money,

1452
01:18:31.260 --> 01:18:32.140
I'd be okay.

1453
01:18:33.180 --> 01:18:35.060
But I'm trying not to do that.

1454
01:18:35.500 --> 01:18:36.880
So, and then I have two dogs.

1455
01:18:37.040 --> 01:18:39.320
So it's just like, I'm like, oh my gosh, Lord,

1456
01:18:39.840 --> 01:18:41.780
please help me, which I believe he will.

1457
01:18:42.120 --> 01:18:45.540
But every day I have to like keep trying to submit that.

1458
01:18:45.880 --> 01:18:48.880
The other thing is like my family's not proud of me.

1459
01:18:48.880 --> 01:18:51.060
And I think I have to submit that as well.

1460
01:18:51.180 --> 01:18:52.520
Like when I bought this house

1461
01:18:52.760 --> 01:18:54.640
and they're all like not believers.

1462
01:18:55.160 --> 01:18:56.560
So it was nice.

1463
01:18:56.620 --> 01:18:58.160
I didn't let it fully affect my heart,

1464
01:18:58.180 --> 01:19:00.660
but they're like, we're so proud of you, you bought a house.

1465
01:19:00.780 --> 01:19:02.500
And, you know, that felt really good.

1466
01:19:02.680 --> 01:19:05.340
And now I can just kind of like feel their disappointment,

1467
01:19:05.620 --> 01:19:07.500
even though, and I'm so frustrated,

1468
01:19:07.580 --> 01:19:10.680
cause I'm like, you got, like, I don't have them.

1469
01:19:10.740 --> 01:19:12.100
I'm in like the negatives.

1470
01:19:12.120 --> 01:19:14.180
And you guys want me to stay in this place

1471
01:19:14.180 --> 01:19:16.620
and be in debt basically

1472
01:19:16.900 --> 01:19:19.820
because of the world standards of me having a house.

1473
01:19:20.380 --> 01:19:22.860
So anyway, it's frustrating, but.

1474
01:19:23.500 --> 01:19:24.280
Yeah, I can imagine.

1475
01:19:24.760 --> 01:19:26.560
And this is where as well,

1476
01:19:26.940 --> 01:19:28.380
I'm glad you're handling it well.

1477
01:19:28.500 --> 01:19:30.240
So I want to say that,

1478
01:19:30.440 --> 01:19:31.840
but I think this is where

1479
01:19:32.680 --> 01:19:34.820
I would put that on my Jesus cares board.

1480
01:19:35.320 --> 01:19:40.340
I would, you know, just not only

1481
01:19:43.600 --> 01:19:45.800
they're not being proud of you,

1482
01:19:46.140 --> 01:19:48.480
but also the lie that you believe

1483
01:19:49.360 --> 01:19:51.020
that they're not proud of you

1484
01:19:51.020 --> 01:19:52.720
because you live up to a standard.

1485
01:19:52.860 --> 01:19:54.620
And I'm not saying they're not saying things

1486
01:19:54.620 --> 01:19:55.480
to you about that,

1487
01:19:55.520 --> 01:19:57.040
but I feel like the enemy is also

1488
01:19:57.260 --> 01:19:59.140
an assault against your identity.

1489
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:13.560
Because of a house decision, which, you know, I think God is wanting you to continue to stand in your identity, be confident in who you are and really trust their hearts in his hand as well.

1490
01:20:13.980 --> 01:20:15.540
Yeah. Thank you.

1491
01:20:16.660 --> 01:20:20.760
Yeah. And ladies, you know, it's a reminder to that.

1492
01:20:21.080 --> 01:20:22.300
Even our family.

1493
01:20:22.960 --> 01:20:26.060
And I don't mean this in a pressure way, but they're watching.

1494
01:20:27.200 --> 01:20:30.140
They may say they don't agree with you, but guess what?

1495
01:20:30.380 --> 01:20:34.980
When you walk this thing out and you don't have a bunch of debt and then you start stepping into a lot more freedom.

1496
01:20:36.280 --> 01:20:37.720
It's going to be hard to deny.

1497
01:20:38.560 --> 01:20:38.760
God's will.

1498
01:20:40.060 --> 01:20:40.180
Yeah.

1499
01:20:40.180 --> 01:20:43.760
And my whole family, we all spend a whole lot of money we don't have.

1500
01:20:44.280 --> 01:20:45.240
So I'm breaking.

1501
01:20:45.380 --> 01:20:48.400
I'm wanting to break out of that and, like, do something different.

1502
01:20:49.240 --> 01:20:49.780
So thank you.

1503
01:20:50.040 --> 01:20:50.440
Probably.

1504
01:20:50.700 --> 01:20:51.020
You're welcome.

1505
01:20:51.440 --> 01:20:52.500
And here's the key.

1506
01:20:52.660 --> 01:20:53.740
Ladies, did you hear what she said?

1507
01:20:53.740 --> 01:20:56.020
Her family spends a lot of money.

1508
01:20:56.220 --> 01:21:02.540
So what's happening right now as well is she is creating kind of a crossroad, a line in the sand.

1509
01:21:02.580 --> 01:21:04.640
And she's saying, I'm going to do something different.

1510
01:21:05.280 --> 01:21:08.900
Not just be different from them, but because God is leading her to.

1511
01:21:10.820 --> 01:21:12.660
And that's uncomfortable for them.

1512
01:21:14.040 --> 01:21:21.500
So remember this, ladies, when we go to step over, you know, and go in a healthy direction, there's a lot of border bullies.

1513
01:21:22.500 --> 01:21:27.260
And they will try to keep us from crossing over into the healthy side of things.

1514
01:21:27.720 --> 01:21:33.880
And so we don't have to be upset with them, but we have to understand that that's what's going on there.

1515
01:21:34.440 --> 01:21:34.960
Yeah.

1516
01:21:35.140 --> 01:21:36.340
So keep going.

1517
01:21:36.980 --> 01:21:39.740
We're cheering you on and we're praying for you.

1518
01:21:39.740 --> 01:21:41.560
And we're going to believe for your apartment.

1519
01:21:41.620 --> 01:21:45.680
That's going to be able to take your dogs and you can afford it and all of the things.

1520
01:21:46.060 --> 01:21:46.580
Great.

1521
01:21:46.820 --> 01:21:47.360
Thank you.

1522
01:21:47.420 --> 01:21:48.820
I'll post when I get it.

1523
01:21:48.820 --> 01:21:49.320
Yeah.

1524
01:21:49.420 --> 01:21:50.320
Believe in for that.

1525
01:21:50.320 --> 01:21:51.300
Thank you.

1526
01:21:51.540 --> 01:21:52.720
Thank you for sharing crystal.

1527
01:21:53.220 --> 01:21:53.960
Oh, go ahead.

1528
01:22:01.940 --> 01:22:02.520
Wow.

1529
01:22:02.900 --> 01:22:06.520
Thank you for sharing that Alexander that was really beautiful.

1530
01:22:08.520 --> 01:22:09.100
And

1531
01:22:11.320 --> 01:22:13.100
it's hard for me to share but

1532
01:22:14.300 --> 01:22:15.700
just wanting to.

1533
01:22:17.120 --> 01:22:21.700
I know we're all going through different things and I'm just wanting to open up my heart.

1534
01:22:22.800 --> 01:22:26.280
I am really feeling lonely.

1535
01:22:28.600 --> 01:22:31.700
And it really hits hard on Sundays.

1536
01:22:31.940 --> 01:22:33.600
When I leave church.

1537
01:22:36.820 --> 01:22:42.680
And I'm 61. I feel like I volunteered I've signed up for everything.

1538
01:22:43.680 --> 01:22:44.500
I've initiated.

1539
01:22:47.480 --> 01:22:53.500
And I walk out to my car and I'm just so desperate for someone to have lunch with

1540
01:22:59.300 --> 01:23:03.860
was just hard. And then I get attacked by.

1541
01:23:04.880 --> 01:23:15.080
You know I told you I was diagnosed and you know that it's like, what are you doing in this group you're not going to meet anybody you don't even know if you're going to be alive.

1542
01:23:17.800 --> 01:23:23.620
But I've been so moved by the way people have shared their hearts and the things that are going on.

1543
01:23:29.320 --> 01:23:39.000
And then I see things that are open for change and he just shows me things or you ask questions just like you said the thread starts and it starts unraveling.

1544
01:23:39.400 --> 01:23:43.720
But I just need prayer because I'm like this last Sunday I was like, Jesus.

1545
01:23:44.300 --> 01:23:49.860
I was so tired of walking out this car.

1546
01:23:50.480 --> 01:23:53.180
Wanting to have just a meal with somebody.

1547
01:23:54.300 --> 01:23:57.100
And it seems like I, you know, I'll reach out to a woman.

1548
01:23:59.780 --> 01:24:05.120
And I don't have any kids, they have kids. They have grandkids at my age.

1549
01:24:06.400 --> 01:24:12.940
They have busy lives. I was even like when you said we're going to go into rest I thought, I don't want to rest.

1550
01:24:13.940 --> 01:24:16.600
I've got so much free time on my hands.

1551
01:24:17.220 --> 01:24:25.660
And it just, yeah, I'm like Lord, I feel like you've given me purpose and passion I don't understand why it's not.

1552
01:24:26.460 --> 01:24:33.920
Why it's not happening so it stays in my mind like, well because you're probably not going to live, and then I have to fight that.

1553
01:24:37.060 --> 01:24:43.160
So, and then I kept looking down and going, oh my gosh there's 55 people on here do you want to open up to 55 people.

1554
01:24:44.020 --> 01:24:45.440
But I was like, I'm desperate.

1555
01:24:46.540 --> 01:24:50.600
Or that's what I'm glad you did. I'm sorry I lost you on my screen. Okay, I see you again.

1556
01:24:51.600 --> 01:24:59.980
I'm so glad that you did and and hey, ladies, this is where kind of what is the saying the rubber meets the road when you all open up, even in the.

1557
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:05.180
moments where you're just like so nervous too. It just brings so much healing and your sisters

1558
01:25:05.200 --> 01:25:12.920
are cheering you on in the chat, but I want to declare something over you. Vitality and

1559
01:25:12.920 --> 01:25:18.860
long life crystal that it will be yours. And I don't know what the doctors have said to you

1560
01:25:18.860 --> 01:25:23.740
fully. I might've read. I just can't remember exactly. And you don't have to tell me right now,

1561
01:25:23.740 --> 01:25:30.620
but I really want to encourage you to not receive the lie of the enemy that you're not going to

1562
01:25:31.280 --> 01:25:37.060
experience joy and God's blessings because you're not going to be here. And I'm sure that even

1563
01:25:37.060 --> 01:25:43.640
being in our community, we, we have lost, you know, somebody recently. Um, but I think that

1564
01:25:43.640 --> 01:25:48.380
God has led you here to experience community, to experience joy, to experience healing,

1565
01:25:49.020 --> 01:25:55.960
to step into things that God has for you to enjoy. And that can be relationship.

1566
01:25:57.060 --> 01:26:03.400
Okay. And so it sounds like the enemy's really trying to get you to partner with like a spirit

1567
01:26:03.400 --> 01:26:09.280
of death over you. And we want to, I want to encourage you to come out of that and really

1568
01:26:09.280 --> 01:26:15.560
understand that that is the enemy saying that to you. It's no different ladies, not that it's not

1569
01:26:15.560 --> 01:26:21.120
just, you know, when people get assaulted with, and not saying crystal, this is you,

1570
01:26:21.200 --> 01:26:26.700
but just, it comes to mind. And so I feel led to mention this, um, suicidal thoughts, you all,

1571
01:26:27.320 --> 01:26:31.820
the enemy will try to attack people and just tell them that they have no worth it. They're just,

1572
01:26:32.000 --> 01:26:36.240
they don't even need to be here and all that. And so understand that the enemy will also assault

1573
01:26:36.240 --> 01:26:42.320
our minds with stuff like this, especially if we have a diagnosis and try to convince us

1574
01:26:43.400 --> 01:26:48.360
that something is going to happen that may never happen. Y'all literally to the point that even

1575
01:26:48.360 --> 01:26:54.080
some people, even myself, I had something, and this is months ago. Now I was having like pain

1576
01:26:54.080 --> 01:26:59.280
in my chest. I didn't know what it was. And I literally all, I ran down every line of what was

1577
01:26:59.280 --> 01:27:04.640
in my family because like several people in my family have had heart attacks, like in all this

1578
01:27:04.640 --> 01:27:11.400
stuff, y'all it wasn't any of that. It was acid reflex. I was stressed. Y'all was, and I'm not

1579
01:27:11.400 --> 01:27:17.700
saying that's good either, but like the enemy just had me believe in all this stuff that wasn't

1580
01:27:17.880 --> 01:27:24.780
even real. Yeah. You know, I literally was like, I think something like, you know, like, and it was

1581
01:27:24.780 --> 01:27:29.460
like, I literally legit had pain in my arm from this. I'm like, how can this be acid? I felt so

1582
01:27:29.460 --> 01:27:39.260
silly, but I'm glad I went, but so catch the thought. Okay. Regarding this health stuff.

1583
01:27:40.040 --> 01:27:43.900
Let's, I would encourage you to put some scriptures up and some truth, some debt,

1584
01:27:43.920 --> 01:27:50.120
not just scripture declarations. I do. And I have AI even declare and confess things over my body

1585
01:27:50.120 --> 01:27:56.760
in the morning. Probably the biggest thing is just the loneliness of, you know so it was like,

1586
01:27:57.020 --> 01:28:01.900
I've seen enough, you know, just hearing all you guys share your hearts and I'm thinking,

1587
01:28:02.100 --> 01:28:06.320
and then earlier Annette, when you mentioned that it's in community that you heal.

1588
01:28:06.320 --> 01:28:13.880
And I thought, okay, you got to put it out there. And I do, I actually feel better just

1589
01:28:13.880 --> 01:28:19.980
even reading your comments and the post knowing I'm not alone that some of you are struggling

1590
01:28:19.980 --> 01:28:24.300
with the same thing. I don't know why, but there's comfort in that knowing that it's like,

1591
01:28:24.380 --> 01:28:30.240
oh, you feel the same way walking out Sundays. It's a me too moment. Y'all it's really,

1592
01:28:30.620 --> 01:28:34.520
really powerful. When we realize we're not the only one struggling with something

1593
01:28:34.520 --> 01:28:39.060
and here's the other side of this. I want you to really be asking the Lord.

1594
01:28:41.420 --> 01:28:45.720
A number one, if you were already tired and fatigued with something else,

1595
01:28:46.200 --> 01:28:50.620
it's, it really tends to be those times where the enemy will assault us with these

1596
01:28:50.620 --> 01:28:58.840
kinds of things like this. Okay. But B like, what were the lies you were hearing in the middle of

1597
01:28:58.840 --> 01:29:04.880
that? You know, that, you know, are surfacing that you're looking around and there's no one

1598
01:29:04.880 --> 01:29:09.160
making you a priority. And then where did it go from there? You know, where you're really looking

1599
01:29:09.720 --> 01:29:17.420
at all of those things, but then also where did that start for you? You know, when is the first

1600
01:29:17.420 --> 01:29:24.620
time you felt lonely like this? And that let's look at where, you know, is it just in this time

1601
01:29:24.620 --> 01:29:33.040
in this season because of, you know, the weariness of being single or is this linking back to a time

1602
01:29:33.040 --> 01:29:41.340
when you felt really lonely before and not seen and not like the thing that you needed and desired

1603
01:29:41.340 --> 01:29:46.480
and wanted didn't come to pass. And let's just make sure it's not linking. It could be standalone,

1604
01:29:46.780 --> 01:29:54.060
but let's make sure it's not linking back to some other stuff. Because the depth of despair

1605
01:29:54.060 --> 01:29:59.780
that I could hear in you makes me kind of think it's linking to something else.

1606
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:01.440
but let's just see.

1607
01:30:02.220 --> 01:30:06.000
But again, it could be the vulnerability of your share

1608
01:30:06.080 --> 01:30:08.100
that brought that out in you too.

1609
01:30:08.320 --> 01:30:10.320
So I'm not saying it has to be

1610
01:30:10.320 --> 01:30:13.060
because there was something there, but I'm just-

1611
01:30:13.060 --> 01:30:17.380
It's hard for me to, you know, yeah.

1612
01:30:18.040 --> 01:30:19.680
You know, and I think I told you before,

1613
01:30:19.700 --> 01:30:23.160
I work in hospice, so I see a lot of-

1614
01:30:23.160 --> 01:30:23.640
Yes.

1615
01:30:24.640 --> 01:30:26.260
And that's not my person,

1616
01:30:26.580 --> 01:30:29.240
my personality is I always wanna see the good

1617
01:30:29.240 --> 01:30:33.820
and hey, we got this and yes.

1618
01:30:34.640 --> 01:30:37.540
And when I see people decline every day,

1619
01:30:37.540 --> 01:30:39.120
it's just, yeah.

1620
01:30:39.780 --> 01:30:40.120
Yeah.

1621
01:30:40.760 --> 01:30:42.820
And to navigate that, yeah.

1622
01:30:42.820 --> 01:30:45.200
I kind of forgot, I apologize,

1623
01:30:45.200 --> 01:30:46.140
that you work in hospice

1624
01:30:46.140 --> 01:30:47.920
and that we've actually talked a little bit

1625
01:30:47.920 --> 01:30:51.080
about this spirit of death before and the grief.

1626
01:30:51.200 --> 01:30:52.840
And so it's interesting

1627
01:30:52.840 --> 01:30:54.860
because that didn't even come to my mind tonight,

1628
01:30:54.860 --> 01:30:56.660
but that's what came up in my spirit

1629
01:30:56.660 --> 01:30:57.920
when you were talking about this.

1630
01:30:57.920 --> 01:31:03.400
And really too, I also feel like what's coming up

1631
01:31:03.400 --> 01:31:06.160
is like as you're watching people passing in hospice,

1632
01:31:06.620 --> 01:31:09.440
if there's any people that have died alone,

1633
01:31:09.440 --> 01:31:12.180
I want you to know that that right there,

1634
01:31:12.240 --> 01:31:14.140
I feel like is also something,

1635
01:31:14.900 --> 01:31:18.260
the lie believing that you're gonna die alone too.

1636
01:31:18.740 --> 01:31:20.560
And let's not partner with that.

1637
01:31:22.020 --> 01:31:22.340
Yeah.

1638
01:31:22.760 --> 01:31:25.280
And that doesn't, I gotta say that doesn't even,

1639
01:31:26.200 --> 01:31:29.160
cause I know I'm just, I've just seen people see things.

1640
01:31:29.380 --> 01:31:33.240
And so I'm like, okay, Jesus, it's obvious you're here.

1641
01:31:33.660 --> 01:31:34.780
Good, okay.

1642
01:31:34.780 --> 01:31:36.440
So that, I don't really.

1643
01:31:37.260 --> 01:31:40.060
Well, I didn't mean that God isn't with you.

1644
01:31:40.080 --> 01:31:40.400
Yeah.

1645
01:31:40.400 --> 01:31:43.720
I meant that there wasn't like, wouldn't be a physical,

1646
01:31:43.880 --> 01:31:46.300
cause there's people that, when you're,

1647
01:31:46.540 --> 01:31:47.880
I don't know if you've ever witnessed that,

1648
01:31:48.060 --> 01:31:50.660
but my dad himself,

1649
01:31:52.280 --> 01:31:53.940
very lonely man.

1650
01:31:54.560 --> 01:31:56.760
And so I'm just putting that out there

1651
01:31:56.760 --> 01:31:58.140
just to make sure that's not something

1652
01:31:58.300 --> 01:32:00.380
that's in there as well.

1653
01:32:00.380 --> 01:32:01.640
Kind of going around in your mind.

1654
01:32:02.000 --> 01:32:02.000


1655
01:32:02.240 --> 01:32:03.540
But thank you for sharing.

1656
01:32:03.920 --> 01:32:06.980
Way to go on your comments too, really appreciate them.

1657
01:32:07.320 --> 01:32:08.140
Yeah, thank you.

1658
01:32:08.340 --> 01:32:09.300
Yeah, way to go, ladies.

1659
01:32:09.980 --> 01:32:11.320
Awesome, supporting each other.

1660
01:32:11.920 --> 01:32:14.480
Tiffany, I will say if anyone needs to hop off,

1661
01:32:14.600 --> 01:32:16.740
we're at 9.30, wanna acknowledge that.

1662
01:32:17.280 --> 01:32:22.060
I'm gonna get through as many ladies as I can by 10.

1663
01:32:22.060 --> 01:32:24.000
And I know last time I said I was gonna end by 10

1664
01:32:24.000 --> 01:32:25.780
and we kept going, but y'all, I do,

1665
01:32:25.980 --> 01:32:28.720
like I have to get, I have to be done by 10.

1666
01:32:29.600 --> 01:32:32.140
My boss is gonna start not being happy with me.

1667
01:32:33.320 --> 01:32:34.200
Tiffany, go ahead.

1668
01:32:36.160 --> 01:32:38.400
So I had to surrender

1669
01:32:38.960 --> 01:32:41.800
and he's been talking to me about surrendering.

1670
01:32:44.300 --> 01:32:46.300
The fear of doing this.

1671
01:32:47.840 --> 01:32:51.060
I have been in week one for about four weeks.

1672
01:32:52.060 --> 01:32:55.900
And it's because I was sharing with Crystal earlier,

1673
01:32:56.580 --> 01:33:00.220
I'm literally finding myself looking for distractions

1674
01:33:01.620 --> 01:33:04.040
that God and I will have a plan.

1675
01:33:04.240 --> 01:33:07.320
And I'm actually like, okay, tonight when I get home,

1676
01:33:07.340 --> 01:33:09.060
I'm ready to do some hard work.

1677
01:33:09.220 --> 01:33:10.160
Let's do this, Lord.

1678
01:33:10.700 --> 01:33:13.400
And the schedule is clear and all the things.

1679
01:33:14.680 --> 01:33:17.060
And somewhere on my way home,

1680
01:33:17.520 --> 01:33:20.840
I sit down and I am literally like begging

1681
01:33:21.400 --> 01:33:24.120
somebody message, somebody email,

1682
01:33:24.620 --> 01:33:28.040
somebody do something so that I don't have to do this.

1683
01:33:30.240 --> 01:33:32.160
And I want to do this.

1684
01:33:32.840 --> 01:33:34.040
I know you do.

1685
01:33:35.100 --> 01:33:35.640
I know you do.

1686
01:33:36.180 --> 01:33:39.580
And remember that avoidance

1687
01:33:39.580 --> 01:33:43.460
is a self-protection mechanism, ladies.

1688
01:33:43.580 --> 01:33:45.420
So when we avoid something,

1689
01:33:46.240 --> 01:33:50.340
it can be just again, like that hurt,

1690
01:33:50.340 --> 01:33:52.880
that bodyguard kind of coming out

1691
01:33:53.080 --> 01:33:58.220
and really creating an inflating fear in you

1692
01:33:58.220 --> 01:34:01.340
that if you do this, it's gonna be way more painful

1693
01:34:01.340 --> 01:34:03.920
than if you just avoid it.

1694
01:34:04.300 --> 01:34:07.140
The other thing that comes to mind, kind of funny enough,

1695
01:34:07.300 --> 01:34:09.120
so if y'all saw our house right now,

1696
01:34:09.560 --> 01:34:11.660
well, I started working on it a little bit,

1697
01:34:11.760 --> 01:34:14.800
but almost every room when we came back

1698
01:34:14.800 --> 01:34:17.700
was literally just boxes, just everything.

1699
01:34:17.700 --> 01:34:19.900
It's literally like we moved in,

1700
01:34:20.080 --> 01:34:22.760
but everybody just tossed boxes

1701
01:34:22.760 --> 01:34:25.700
and there's just furniture stacked on top of furniture

1702
01:34:25.700 --> 01:34:27.020
that I would have never stacked.

1703
01:34:27.300 --> 01:34:29.780
Like, it's just this kind of craziness, chaos.

1704
01:34:29.920 --> 01:34:32.300
And I say that to say this,

1705
01:34:33.940 --> 01:34:37.080
I found myself last night, I wanted to work on the house

1706
01:34:37.260 --> 01:34:40.460
because I can't stand it like that.

1707
01:34:41.040 --> 01:34:44.420
But I was literally walking from room to room

1708
01:34:44.420 --> 01:34:46.840
like I don't even know where to start.

1709
01:34:48.560 --> 01:34:50.020
Because it just felt like

1710
01:34:50.020 --> 01:34:51.780
it was just like a big mess everywhere.

1711
01:34:52.460 --> 01:34:55.780
Because not only like some of the boxes we packed,

1712
01:34:55.900 --> 01:34:56.980
but because of what we went through,

1713
01:34:57.240 --> 01:34:59.980
this mold crew, they just put all.

1714
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:04.980
stuff in a bunch of boxes and just like I literally don't even know what's in them like my stuff but

1715
01:35:05.040 --> 01:35:12.700
it's all disorganized and so you know the heart boxes are similar sometimes it's like we walk

1716
01:35:12.700 --> 01:35:18.840
into the room and it's like whoa like I'm afraid of that but we don't have to because you know how

1717
01:35:18.840 --> 01:35:26.300
we conquer it and I'm speaking to myself too it's one box at a time it's one box at a time

1718
01:35:26.940 --> 01:35:32.400
and if I look at the room as a whole and just stand there and look at it I would get overwhelmed

1719
01:35:33.660 --> 01:35:41.740
but if I lord help me just to start with one box so today what I did is I I went to a different

1720
01:35:41.740 --> 01:35:46.380
room that felt more doable for now and I started just working on that room just a little bit

1721
01:35:46.840 --> 01:35:53.720
because progress for me is helping me get ready to deal with the big room so I feel like that's

1722
01:35:53.720 --> 01:36:00.400
for you over your own heart that you do that when it comes to your heart how do you say

1723
01:36:00.960 --> 01:36:08.460
like in the house yes I get that yeah how do you do that in your heart same way you really I mean

1724
01:36:08.460 --> 01:36:17.640
it really is the same way lord what's one thing that you want me to work on today and

1725
01:36:18.760 --> 01:36:25.060
it's really giving yourself permission to not avoid it versus giving yourself permission to

1726
01:36:25.060 --> 01:36:32.960
avoid it so I would encourage you to ask the lord when's the first time I avoided my pain

1727
01:36:33.960 --> 01:36:40.920
to protect myself and let's maybe start there because that's that's what's happening right now

1728
01:36:40.920 --> 01:36:48.260
so let's find out when this started for you and get to the root of the avoidance versus trying to

1729
01:36:48.260 --> 01:36:57.080
figure out all the other boxes right now that makes sense yeah yeah so um maybe it will help you

1730
01:36:57.780 --> 01:37:02.040
and I don't want you to receive shame no matter what but maybe it will help you to

1731
01:37:03.320 --> 01:37:08.040
have a level of like okay I'm gonna be accountable so I want you to come into the group

1732
01:37:08.900 --> 01:37:15.260
after you've prayed about that and let's talk about it and then I can help or Annette or any

1733
01:37:15.260 --> 01:37:22.500
Andrea can help coach you through it from there but it literally is one bite at a time one step

1734
01:37:22.500 --> 01:37:30.460
at a time it is opening one box at a time so for now the box that you'll ask the lord about is

1735
01:37:30.460 --> 01:37:38.500
lord when's the first time I avoided dealing with pain that I was feeling to protect myself

1736
01:37:40.180 --> 01:37:46.800
okay okay all right you got this you got this and and ladies I mean well let me say this Tiffany

1737
01:37:46.800 --> 01:37:52.440
you're not alone I've had a lot of people kind of get to where you're at and just really struggle

1738
01:37:52.440 --> 01:37:58.200
to work on the material because of the same kind of things you're facing and they ended up working

1739
01:37:58.200 --> 01:38:05.000
on it I had a lady that got stuck in week three and she was probably in week three for like

1740
01:38:05.640 --> 01:38:12.980
six months and I just she just kept showing up to the lives and God did a work in her and you know

1741
01:38:13.160 --> 01:38:20.200
when she was ready and with some loving nudging from me she moved forward and so I just want you

1742
01:38:20.200 --> 01:38:26.480
to like just just extend grace to yourself because again there's a reason that you're avoiding

1743
01:38:27.240 --> 01:38:33.220
so give yourself um the love the grace and let's just start with that step number one

1744
01:38:33.220 --> 01:38:38.220
and see how it goes okay thank you all right you're welcome

1745
01:38:40.340 --> 01:38:44.360
uh Ashley says in the chat how do you know when it's the next when it's time to move to the next

1746
01:38:44.360 --> 01:38:51.440
week in phase well I think it's just asking the lord you know am I ready to move forward lord to

1747
01:38:51.440 --> 01:38:58.900
and trusting that he will lead you now I will say this ladies if you get into week three it might

1748
01:38:58.900 --> 01:39:03.380
even be at the end of week two I can't remember when Jackie says it but if you get into week three

1749
01:39:03.380 --> 01:39:09.660
and you haven't felt anything yet like at all it's probably because you're numb and Jackie

1750
01:39:09.660 --> 01:39:13.700
talks about that in one of her videos and we encourage you to go back and start at the beginning

1751
01:39:13.800 --> 01:39:20.780
because some of you you need some a couple weeks just to become unnumb and to start to feel things

1752
01:39:20.780 --> 01:39:27.080
okay Lisa thank you for that in week three so be aware of that okay and just trust the lord

1753
01:39:27.280 --> 01:39:38.940
in your process UNESSA hi hi everyone um I I felt like I really want to surrender I'm going to try

1754
01:39:38.940 --> 01:39:44.960
to explain this the best way that I know how um is that I feel like I have to give up this idea

1755
01:39:44.960 --> 01:39:51.380
that my husband's this unicorn that somehow is going to be something that someone that I've

1756
01:39:51.380 --> 01:39:57.640
never met before and the only reason why I say that is because I haven't I've dated but I haven't

1757
01:39:57.640 --> 01:39:59.780
dated that many I've gotten to know

1758
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:06.300
lot of different gentlemen and I feel like every single time I begin to like open myself up,

1759
01:40:06.300 --> 01:40:11.960
it's like I get excited but then something happens where I'm like okay this just isn't

1760
01:40:11.960 --> 01:40:17.120
the one and obviously it's because I'm praying I'm also inviting the Lord into it um but then

1761
01:40:17.120 --> 01:40:25.180
I feel like one thing um that I've been feeling more strongly it's like Lord like I'm 31 I feel

1762
01:40:25.180 --> 01:40:33.300
I've been trying it out and it just really seems like you have me protected and it's like one

1763
01:40:33.300 --> 01:40:39.260
gentleman will come it almost feels like it's just another distraction and then I'm just bawling my

1764
01:40:39.260 --> 01:40:43.820
eyes out because I'm like when is it going to be the time like I don't understand and I feel like

1765
01:40:43.820 --> 01:40:48.540
I've gotten so many prophetic words over my husband that at this point I feel like I've had

1766
01:40:48.540 --> 01:40:56.440
to the Lord um but it just almost feels like I know he's not trying to keep anything from me I

1767
01:40:56.440 --> 01:41:00.760
don't know if you've seen that picture of like the big teddy bear that Jesus has I've gotten

1768
01:41:00.760 --> 01:41:06.220
prophetic words on that and that's just what I always seem to feel is taking place but I'm like

1769
01:41:06.220 --> 01:41:11.780
what is happening where is he and when I meet him if he's going through his own thing I'm gonna be

1770
01:41:11.780 --> 01:41:17.580
like you took forever for us to meet but um all in that to say that sometimes that lie just comes

1771
01:41:17.580 --> 01:41:24.340
in and it just feels so frustrating because you're really trying to trust the Lord and I've

1772
01:41:24.340 --> 01:41:28.700
already cried out I said Lord if you don't want me to be married I'm okay with staying single

1773
01:41:29.200 --> 01:41:34.860
but you place this desire in my heart and so I need you to bring what you have for me um

1774
01:41:35.860 --> 01:41:44.380
but it's just a struggle so I feel like that was my surrender I love it I'm gonna ask you to

1775
01:41:44.500 --> 01:41:51.040
surrender something else I'm gonna ask you to surrender the statement that you just made Lord

1776
01:41:51.040 --> 01:41:56.940
if you don't want me to be married because guess what I think he wants you to be married and that's

1777
01:41:56.940 --> 01:42:02.500
why you're here so you don't even need to pray that anymore you can partner with God I believe

1778
01:42:02.520 --> 01:42:08.320
that you have a spirit from mate for me that I'm a bride and that you're going to lead me to my

1779
01:42:08.320 --> 01:42:12.640
spirit mate so I want to encourage you to come out of agreement kind of with that and I love that

1780
01:42:12.640 --> 01:42:16.800
prayer I love the posture of that prayer understand why we pray those things ladies

1781
01:42:17.540 --> 01:42:26.460
okay but you know the reality is is that if you were meant to be single forever like Jackie says

1782
01:42:26.460 --> 01:42:32.680
you're not going to feel led to join a group like this if you felt called to singleness you're not

1783
01:42:32.680 --> 01:42:38.260
going to feel led to be in a group like this so God has placed the desire of marriage in your heart

1784
01:42:39.260 --> 01:42:46.620
so the next thing I want to say is that you said when I open up and I get excited then

1785
01:42:46.940 --> 01:42:54.960
then it's not the right guy so I want to ask you this do you like when you feel excited tell me

1786
01:42:55.140 --> 01:43:01.540
what's happening is it something about the guy is it something like you're talking about something

1787
01:43:01.540 --> 01:43:08.240
like what's getting you excited and then what causes you to kind of shut down um

1788
01:43:08.260 --> 01:43:14.860
I would say like more recently it's the excitement of like I'm used to dating

1789
01:43:16.240 --> 01:43:23.120
men who are in the world so men who claim to know the Lord gets me excited because I'm like oh like

1790
01:43:23.120 --> 01:43:30.100
I'm finally meeting somebody who says they know the Lord and the fact that they are walking out

1791
01:43:30.100 --> 01:43:38.100
in their own relationship with the Lord but then usually what's been happening is feel like it

1792
01:43:38.100 --> 01:43:43.540
turns into like let's be one in less than a week and it's like wait a minute like we just started

1793
01:43:43.540 --> 01:43:50.020
talking like I don't understand and so um yeah that's where I'm like anxious attachers or just

1794
01:43:50.020 --> 01:43:55.940
unhealthy is what I hear you saying yes okay um do you tend to struggle with avoidance

1795
01:43:56.860 --> 01:44:05.060
in relationships or or not um I don't think so no okay I just wanted to make sure it wasn't some

1796
01:44:05.060 --> 01:44:13.620
that kicking in um I think the other thing genuinely um is just really partnering with um

1797
01:44:14.840 --> 01:44:20.680
taking steps every day to get out and about meeting new people practicing saying hello to men

1798
01:44:20.680 --> 01:44:27.080
even if you already do it I just I want to put this out there smiling at men like not having

1799
01:44:27.080 --> 01:44:33.980
to flirt but just this practice of like allowing yourself to be seen by men to be known um you know

1800
01:44:33.980 --> 01:44:39.460
maybe it's going to a different church and going to their singles group maybe it's you know going

1801
01:44:39.460 --> 01:44:45.780
to a different town to experience something new um ladies we have to get out of the place where

1802
01:44:45.780 --> 01:44:50.980
we're at if if something isn't happening it's not taking it into our own hands you're praying first

1803
01:44:51.160 --> 01:44:57.260
asking the Lord but then also like just going out and exploring and and just seeing where

1804
01:44:57.260 --> 01:44:59.840
like who God might connect you to or lead you to

1805
01:45:00.000 --> 01:45:03.420
And every step that we take matters.

1806
01:45:04.080 --> 01:45:07.160
So for example, I was never going to go back on the dating apps.

1807
01:45:07.820 --> 01:45:12.900
But then Jackie, the Lord through Jackie, like multiple times,

1808
01:45:13.840 --> 01:45:15.580
y'all, she had multiple conversations with me.

1809
01:45:15.580 --> 01:45:17.720
She's like, you got to do this, Bethany, you got to do this.

1810
01:45:18.000 --> 01:45:19.020
I'm like, I don't want to do this.

1811
01:45:19.100 --> 01:45:20.320
That's how I met the girl's dad.

1812
01:45:20.340 --> 01:45:21.020
And he was horrible.

1813
01:45:21.140 --> 01:45:21.840
He was on an app.

1814
01:45:21.860 --> 01:45:23.260
I'm never getting on an app ever again.

1815
01:45:23.380 --> 01:45:24.720
Y'all, I said it so many times.

1816
01:45:25.540 --> 01:45:30.180
And then one day I was like, you might be right.

1817
01:45:30.480 --> 01:45:32.300
I probably should do this.

1818
01:45:32.500 --> 01:45:36.120
And that night they did a session on how to create profiles and I

1819
01:45:36.120 --> 01:45:39.320
created my profile that night and y'all the thing that I said,

1820
01:45:39.320 --> 01:45:43.460
I would never do is what God used to lead me to my spirit mate.

1821
01:45:43.520 --> 01:45:44.680
So there's that.

1822
01:45:45.220 --> 01:45:48.920
So sometimes it's like getting out of our own way to, you know,

1823
01:45:49.640 --> 01:45:53.960
and I'm just again walking and things and trying something new.

1824
01:45:53.960 --> 01:45:57.460
And so, you know, so I I'm not saying you haven't tried.

1825
01:45:57.540 --> 01:45:58.060
Okay.

1826
01:45:58.060 --> 01:45:59.700
I don't want that to come across that way.

1827
01:46:00.020 --> 01:46:04.040
It sounds like God was defending you and protecting you from the

1828
01:46:04.080 --> 01:46:08.940
obsessive, you know, maybe kind of controlling or kind of like

1829
01:46:08.940 --> 01:46:14.280
trying to trying to pace it really fast, but I don't think God

1830
01:46:14.280 --> 01:46:16.400
wants you to partner with Lord.

1831
01:46:16.480 --> 01:46:20.160
If you don't have this for me, I think genuinely that's a huge

1832
01:46:20.220 --> 01:46:23.720
thing for you because as soon as we partner with that stuff ladies,

1833
01:46:23.720 --> 01:46:26.480
it's literally like saying, God, you don't have this for me.

1834
01:46:26.680 --> 01:46:30.100
And so why, why would he send us our spirit mate?

1835
01:46:30.100 --> 01:46:32.720
If we don't believe he has marriage for us.

1836
01:46:33.000 --> 01:46:35.020
Do you see how they contradict each other?

1837
01:46:35.940 --> 01:46:36.460
Yeah.

1838
01:46:36.640 --> 01:46:41.400
So we can, we can pray and say things like, I believe my unbelief,

1839
01:46:41.860 --> 01:46:44.340
but we don't want to partner with, you don't have this for me.

1840
01:46:44.660 --> 01:46:47.300
We want to partner with even remember the activation.

1841
01:46:47.560 --> 01:46:49.340
I've loved seeing the pictures.

1842
01:46:49.340 --> 01:46:54.840
I've seen Nadine was doing a walk down the aisle practice.

1843
01:46:54.940 --> 01:46:57.400
That was awesome with the veil on some shoes.

1844
01:46:57.400 --> 01:46:57.680
Ladies.

1845
01:46:57.680 --> 01:46:59.620
Let's keep putting the bridal gear in there.

1846
01:46:59.700 --> 01:47:01.620
What did God lead you to do to partner with?

1847
01:47:01.780 --> 01:47:02.460
I'm a bride.

1848
01:47:03.380 --> 01:47:06.560
So you Nessa, I want you to do that activation.

1849
01:47:06.640 --> 01:47:10.980
I want you to partner with I am a bride and ask the Lord what

1850
01:47:10.980 --> 01:47:13.600
bride gear to go by and do the picture in the group.

1851
01:47:13.600 --> 01:47:16.680
I want to see that from you because that's going to help you

1852
01:47:16.680 --> 01:47:19.160
partner with God has a spirit mate for you.

1853
01:47:20.180 --> 01:47:21.060
Thank you.

1854
01:47:21.520 --> 01:47:22.060
You're welcome.

1855
01:47:23.460 --> 01:47:23.780
Good night.

1856
01:47:25.140 --> 01:47:26.340
Margaret, go ahead.

1857
01:47:28.620 --> 01:47:30.020
I thank you so much.

1858
01:47:31.400 --> 01:47:35.840
I decided to share because I think that this area that I is

1859
01:47:35.840 --> 01:47:37.540
really, you know, relates to a lot of things.

1860
01:47:39.660 --> 01:47:42.020
I'm 62 and I've not been married.

1861
01:47:43.940 --> 01:47:47.660
And I've been on hold for a long time, just in a lot of areas.

1862
01:47:48.900 --> 01:47:50.340
And there's a lot of walls.

1863
01:47:50.560 --> 01:47:53.020
But one of the things right now, this area of surrender is

1864
01:47:53.140 --> 01:48:00.120
actually financial and I can have a hard time making decisions

1865
01:48:00.120 --> 01:48:03.820
on a hard time moving forward and I can save money, but I don't

1866
01:48:03.820 --> 01:48:09.220
know how to plan or invest, you know, so I'm not where where

1867
01:48:09.220 --> 01:48:12.520
I need to be at my age, but I'm better off than a person can

1868
01:48:12.520 --> 01:48:13.380
be, but I need an advisor.

1869
01:48:13.380 --> 01:48:14.560
I decided I needed advisor.

1870
01:48:14.660 --> 01:48:16.860
I tried to think well, I should try to do some, you know, and

1871
01:48:16.940 --> 01:48:21.980
figured out myself need an advisor and I've been stuck on

1872
01:48:21.980 --> 01:48:26.120
that and I've been not not moving forward on that and I've

1873
01:48:26.120 --> 01:48:30.000
been, you know, there's fear like, oh, you know, whatever

1874
01:48:30.000 --> 01:48:32.620
this decision is, it's going to really impact my future.

1875
01:48:34.200 --> 01:48:38.680
And I actually was rejected by an advisor a few years ago

1876
01:48:38.680 --> 01:48:41.140
because I was taking too long and asking a lot of questions

1877
01:48:44.060 --> 01:48:49.680
and they were very kind and so and I but I was leaning towards

1878
01:48:49.680 --> 01:48:51.880
going with that person, you know, that was like then I was

1879
01:48:51.880 --> 01:48:55.920
like, oh no, and then I was a year about a year ago.

1880
01:48:55.920 --> 01:49:00.220
I was about ready to go with a different one and I asked for

1881
01:49:00.220 --> 01:49:04.440
prayer at church and they or in my home group and they had

1882
01:49:04.440 --> 01:49:07.640
a word come to them and that word reminded me of this other

1883
01:49:07.640 --> 01:49:09.100
person that I'd never interviewed.

1884
01:49:09.100 --> 01:49:10.260
So I'm like, oh shoot.

1885
01:49:10.260 --> 01:49:11.300
I guess I've got to do this.

1886
01:49:11.320 --> 01:49:16.880
So then I did that and that one was I ended up not going there

1887
01:49:16.880 --> 01:49:20.080
were some maybe personality issues, but they they were giving

1888
01:49:20.080 --> 01:49:25.240
me a little bit of count counsel that that I wasn't sure was

1889
01:49:26.120 --> 01:49:28.080
God and so I didn't go with it.

1890
01:49:28.080 --> 01:49:29.280
I'm like, well, that was my home group.

1891
01:49:29.340 --> 01:49:32.780
Was I supposed to you know, so then I've been stuck for a long

1892
01:49:32.780 --> 01:49:36.600
time and then so that's I get I'm stuck and I but I need to

1893
01:49:36.720 --> 01:49:41.760
Surrender I'm sir, you know surrender the outcome and trust

1894
01:49:41.760 --> 01:49:45.020
that God is going to take care of me that it's not all on me,

1895
01:49:45.020 --> 01:49:48.380
you know, that's what I believe I need to do and I'll stop

1896
01:49:48.380 --> 01:49:50.740
talking so you can say whatever you know, this is okay.

1897
01:49:50.760 --> 01:49:51.660
This is great.

1898
01:49:52.480 --> 01:49:53.020
Here's the question.

1899
01:49:53.060 --> 01:49:56.520
I actually have for you is when is the first time you question

1900
01:49:56.580 --> 01:49:59.660
yourself when you were making a decision like, you know,

1901
01:50:00.000 --> 01:50:04.940
It's kind of what I hear is a back and forth like doubting yourself in a decision and that's

1902
01:50:04.940 --> 01:50:09.940
why you're over asking questions and kind of trying to look at every little aspect of

1903
01:50:09.940 --> 01:50:10.700
what's going on.

1904
01:50:10.700 --> 01:50:16.340
And that's not a bad thing, but it's overextended and it's probably fueled by fear.

1905
01:50:16.460 --> 01:50:18.960
You know, afraid of making the wrong decision.

1906
01:50:19.100 --> 01:50:26.480
So my question again for you is when was the first time you can remember like ever trying

1907
01:50:26.480 --> 01:50:31.920
to make a decision and you were doubting yourself or you made a decision and someone said something

1908
01:50:31.920 --> 01:50:33.840
to you that led you to doubt yourself?

1909
01:50:34.000 --> 01:50:36.100
Could be either one of those.

1910
01:50:39.380 --> 01:50:44.160
If I were to answer, my first thought is I've always had a hard time with decisions.

1911
01:50:44.160 --> 01:50:48.940
Okay, tell me the first time you remember having a hard time with a decision.

1912
01:50:57.940 --> 01:51:02.460
Well, I probably just chose not to make decisions, right?

1913
01:51:02.660 --> 01:51:08.440
So I guess the, you know, honestly the biggest, let me just tell you this, the biggest first

1914
01:51:08.440 --> 01:51:12.380
time because I had no regrets in my life until I was 29.

1915
01:51:13.100 --> 01:51:19.280
Like I had no regrets in my life and because I was always praying and, you know, I believe

1916
01:51:19.280 --> 01:51:25.080
God was helping me, but then I had to decide about whether to make a big move and across

1917
01:51:25.120 --> 01:51:25.640
the country.

1918
01:51:26.220 --> 01:51:31.900
And it was for a ministry and I was leaning towards not doing it.

1919
01:51:31.920 --> 01:51:38.540
And so I met with these people in my church, some leaders, and they were like, oh no, Margaret,

1920
01:51:38.600 --> 01:51:39.700
you just can't see.

1921
01:51:39.700 --> 01:51:41.520
You can't see what God is doing.

1922
01:51:42.820 --> 01:51:47.860
And so then that really, that was, that was a really hard back and forth.

1923
01:51:49.540 --> 01:51:51.820
And I really struggled with that decision.

1924
01:51:51.940 --> 01:51:53.860
So that's a really good question that you asked.

1925
01:51:53.900 --> 01:51:55.840
I hadn't really thought that that was when it started.

1926
01:51:56.500 --> 01:51:56.720
Yeah.

1927
01:51:56.720 --> 01:51:57.780
So let me ask you this.

1928
01:51:57.940 --> 01:51:59.640
Did that go well for you or not?

1929
01:52:01.840 --> 01:52:05.740
I doubted when I, when I moved, I ran into some roadblocks.

1930
01:52:06.060 --> 01:52:06.500
Go ahead.

1931
01:52:07.420 --> 01:52:12.900
So I'm saying like, so when you moved, did that go well for you or what?

1932
01:52:13.800 --> 01:52:16.460
So the answer to that is I doubted.

1933
01:52:16.680 --> 01:52:23.040
I doubted once I got out there and I doubted that I was like, oh, I should not have moved,

1934
01:52:23.700 --> 01:52:26.200
you know, so that I really, I lost my footing.

1935
01:52:26.400 --> 01:52:32.020
I lost my footing with God that I had spent a while that he had spent time developing

1936
01:52:32.020 --> 01:52:38.780
in my twenties and that I had, and that I thought I lost a lot of things.

1937
01:52:38.780 --> 01:52:41.340
Like I thought I lost my salvation, honestly.

1938
01:52:43.220 --> 01:52:47.220
So there were, it's a, it's a huge thing, you know, it's huge that I can't, I'm not

1939
01:52:47.220 --> 01:52:56.300
going to, but that and so I've been kind of not with, I've been without the same ability

1940
01:52:56.300 --> 01:52:59.880
to have confidence, you know.

1941
01:53:00.160 --> 01:53:00.720
Yeah.

1942
01:53:00.720 --> 01:53:02.740
This is really, I mean, this is really important.

1943
01:53:03.000 --> 01:53:08.720
I mean, this, this, this situation led you to question your own salvation.

1944
01:53:09.840 --> 01:53:10.880
That's huge.

1945
01:53:11.360 --> 01:53:12.740
So let me ask you this.

1946
01:53:13.120 --> 01:53:16.840
You know, the ministers were saying to you, you're just not seeing the full, whatever

1947
01:53:16.840 --> 01:53:17.920
it was they were saying, right?

1948
01:53:18.400 --> 01:53:25.420
So do you feel like you ended up seeing what they were saying you were going to see or

1949
01:53:25.420 --> 01:53:25.700
not?

1950
01:53:27.580 --> 01:53:30.000
So the move was to Washington DC.

1951
01:53:30.000 --> 01:53:35.740
It was to work with an international ministry that they wanted me, like they were asking

1952
01:53:35.740 --> 01:53:38.000
me to come and move with them.

1953
01:53:38.140 --> 01:53:44.700
And I had been living in a small town, but I was, but anyway, did I see it?

1954
01:53:44.740 --> 01:53:53.660
I would say I, it opened up issues with my, my childhood that I had not seen in the small

1955
01:53:53.660 --> 01:53:59.100
town, but when I went to that bigger pond, shall we say the bigger, I saw things about

1956
01:53:59.100 --> 01:54:03.900
my family and my upbringing that I had not seen before.

1957
01:54:04.720 --> 01:54:06.180
And then I go ahead.

1958
01:54:06.960 --> 01:54:07.520
Okay.

1959
01:54:07.520 --> 01:54:10.800
Do you all see what we're starting to kind of get to here?

1960
01:54:12.000 --> 01:54:13.540
Margaret, this is kind of huge.

1961
01:54:14.040 --> 01:54:20.480
Not only did this cause you to doubt yourself, to doubt your salvation, but it opened issues

1962
01:54:20.540 --> 01:54:23.540
with your childhood things that you hadn't seen before.

1963
01:54:23.860 --> 01:54:28.180
So really what I hear you saying is this was probably one of the first times you started

1964
01:54:28.180 --> 01:54:31.100
experiencing some deep need for heartwork.

1965
01:54:32.000 --> 01:54:32.980
Deep need for heartwork?

1966
01:54:33.300 --> 01:54:33.460
You said?

1967
01:54:34.220 --> 01:54:34.260
Yeah.

1968
01:54:34.340 --> 01:54:39.940
You know, it was, I would say it was sheltered in the small, in my church, which I didn't

1969
01:54:39.940 --> 01:54:40.720
grow up in church.

1970
01:54:40.860 --> 01:54:42.000
It was a God thing.

1971
01:54:42.100 --> 01:54:48.600
And I, I lived with, I was reparented in a small, in my twenties, but I was still sheltered.

1972
01:54:48.880 --> 01:54:51.560
So when I moved there, it was my first time on my own.

1973
01:54:51.600 --> 01:54:52.860
I moved all by myself.

1974
01:54:54.220 --> 01:54:58.100
God was there and I let in doubts.

1975
01:54:59.260 --> 01:54:59.980
And I know the enemy.

1976
01:55:00.000 --> 01:55:05.780
was working a lot. And so that's where, I mean, I could, I don't want to take up all this time here,

1977
01:55:05.840 --> 01:55:09.780
but you're doing great. This is really, this is important and this is going to help a lot of other

1978
01:55:09.620 --> 01:55:16.380
people. So what I want to encourage you to do is, you know, I'm not saying you shouldn't have made

1979
01:55:16.380 --> 01:55:19.680
that move. So I want to make sure that's real clear. I'm just trying to ask questions to help

1980
01:55:19.680 --> 01:55:25.680
me better, um, know where to lead you from here. But I definitely think that time in your life,

1981
01:55:25.680 --> 01:55:31.500
we need to ask Jesus to come in and give you a revelation of what was his thoughts,

1982
01:55:31.640 --> 01:55:36.380
what is his heart? What does he want you to know? And really where, um, I talk about

1983
01:55:36.380 --> 01:55:43.820
convergence a lot. So at that time you experienced a split to some degree, to the point that you were

1984
01:55:43.820 --> 01:55:48.420
like literally questioning everything about yourself, including your salvation. That is huge.

1985
01:55:48.520 --> 01:55:54.560
And so what we need is for God to help you, uh, if you need to forgive yourself for doubt,

1986
01:55:54.560 --> 01:56:00.060
forgive yourself for what anything for, you know, forgive those people for the pressure they put on

1987
01:56:00.060 --> 01:56:06.700
you because you know, I'm not saying they were wrong, but it may have pushed you into a decision

1988
01:56:06.700 --> 01:56:12.860
you were not maybe ready to make. I don't know, but let's just pray about that and see if there's

1989
01:56:12.860 --> 01:56:17.920
anybody to forgive in that situation, including yourself, but where there starts to be this

1990
01:56:18.020 --> 01:56:25.080
convergence of you, um, yourself right now, but converging back with the 29 year old version of

1991
01:56:25.080 --> 01:56:30.820
yourself and Hey, here's the other key. Maybe your identity was already struggling before that all

1992
01:56:30.820 --> 01:56:37.460
ever happened. Oh yeah. I mean, like, yeah. Oh yeah. But you were saying you had no regrets,

1993
01:56:37.640 --> 01:56:44.160
which is amazing. Yes. But I think what happened is the pressure of that decision

1994
01:56:44.160 --> 01:56:51.500
caused this fissure that linked back to wounds back here. You didn't have the tools to process

1995
01:56:51.580 --> 01:56:57.980
that stuff. You're just kind of left floundering. And then that's where the enemy can come right in

1996
01:56:57.980 --> 01:57:02.480
because then it creates trauma and wounds and all that stuff. And he just sewed a bunch of

1997
01:57:02.480 --> 01:57:09.960
seeds of lies. And so now what, what needs to happen in this heartwork is God helping you kind

1998
01:57:10.520 --> 01:57:17.280
recognize all the different lies that were sown in that time, but also back when your identity

1999
01:57:17.280 --> 01:57:22.360
was first kind of struck back at whatever time. And so we need the Lord to reveal that too.

2000
01:57:24.140 --> 01:57:29.100
Thank you. Yeah, you're welcome. And ladies don't ever apologize. If I need to move us along,

2001
01:57:29.200 --> 01:57:33.360
I will. I know we're at nine 58. I did say I was going to end at 10, but I'm going to,

2002
01:57:33.360 --> 01:57:37.440
I'm going to break my word. We're going to finish my last three ladies, Alice,

2003
01:57:37.440 --> 01:57:40.800
Catherine, Stacy. So that's the order we're going to go. Alice, go ahead.

2004
01:57:44.680 --> 01:57:56.220
Hey, you guys. I can definitely go some other day. It's not, it's not a problem. Are you sure?

2005
01:57:57.360 --> 01:58:01.460
Yep. I'm sure. Okay. All right. So

2006
01:58:03.620 --> 01:58:13.880
the biggest thing that I need to let go of is, is my, is my timing that I believe that

2007
01:58:13.880 --> 01:58:28.120
I need God to work. I mentioned one at a time when I came on video that I've been put on non-pay by

2008
01:58:28.120 --> 01:58:36.320
the federal agency that I worked for back in May. And I am,

2009
01:58:38.740 --> 01:58:48.840
per my, per the way I see reality, I'm on my last month of being able to, to make it

2010
01:58:49.180 --> 01:58:59.500
um, without God showing up in a miraculous way financially. Um, and

2011
01:59:01.500 --> 01:59:11.900
some days are okay. Some days are really hard to keep, um, the fears out, um,

2012
01:59:14.320 --> 01:59:28.500
and just, um, move forward into the future that God has promised me and patiently and, um,

2013
01:59:28.500 --> 01:59:39.440
with faith, wait for God to come through with what he said to me that he will do. Um,

2014
01:59:41.080 --> 01:59:45.440
so that's the thing that I am struggling with.

2015
01:59:46.960 --> 01:59:51.780
When's the first time Alice that you struggled financially, like in your life ever? Was it with

2016
01:59:51.780 --> 01:59:59.980
your parents? Um, was it by yourself? Um, I struggled financially.

2017
02:00:00.000 --> 02:00:05.420
Financially, when I came here to the United States,

2018
02:00:05.660 --> 02:00:17.080
I was with my daughter and my ex left

2019
02:00:17.460 --> 02:00:19.420
and drained the bank accounts.

2020
02:00:19.960 --> 02:00:22.880
My daughter, I mean, I did not know that the money was gone.

2021
02:00:23.060 --> 02:00:28.780
I was at a Kroger buying diapers and formula for the kid

2022
02:00:28.780 --> 02:00:33.100
and I couldn't buy anything because there was no money

2023
02:00:33.100 --> 02:00:40.720
in the bank account and things got even worse.

2024
02:00:41.180 --> 02:00:45.340
He came and he stole the car from the parking,

2025
02:00:45.500 --> 02:00:50.460
I mean, from the apartment complex and things just escalated

2026
02:00:50.460 --> 02:00:53.160
but God pulled me through.

2027
02:00:53.960 --> 02:00:57.120
I mean, it just, it was incredible how he worked.

2028
02:00:58.080 --> 02:01:04.320
Yeah, but that fear, that feeling of unsafe,

2029
02:01:05.120 --> 02:01:11.480
the lack of safety, financial safety was pretty rough

2030
02:01:11.480 --> 02:01:15.460
because I don't have any family here in the United States.

2031
02:01:15.740 --> 02:01:20.320
They're all abroad and it's tough.

2032
02:01:21.000 --> 02:01:26.700
So, but now this is the fourth time

2033
02:01:26.700 --> 02:01:30.420
that I have been put on non-pay by the agency

2034
02:01:30.420 --> 02:01:35.940
and I am trying to find another job, obviously.

2035
02:01:37.580 --> 02:01:43.680
Nothing has materialized yet, but I know it's coming.

2036
02:01:44.160 --> 02:01:46.640
He's always provided for me.

2037
02:01:47.700 --> 02:01:52.180
It's just, it's just hard.

2038
02:01:52.860 --> 02:01:54.660
It's just hard, you know?

2039
02:01:54.660 --> 02:01:57.800
I'm sorry, this phone keeps falling apart here.

2040
02:01:58.080 --> 02:02:02.620
So anyway, that's it.

2041
02:02:03.160 --> 02:02:06.980
So I get Alexandra and her issue with the house,

2042
02:02:08.280 --> 02:02:14.240
but I went through that, COVID, I had a job in Georgia

2043
02:02:14.240 --> 02:02:17.720
and I put my house on the market and COVID happened

2044
02:02:17.840 --> 02:02:23.500
and I didn't want to sell because the Georgia job went away,

2045
02:02:24.020 --> 02:02:26.680
but I couldn't, I had to because I was in the contract

2046
02:02:26.680 --> 02:02:28.500
and that guy really wanted to buy my house

2047
02:02:28.780 --> 02:02:30.840
and God made it happen.

2048
02:02:31.060 --> 02:02:33.140
You know, and I just, the timing of everything,

2049
02:02:33.140 --> 02:02:38.080
he found me a place to rent and got me a house to buy

2050
02:02:38.080 --> 02:02:43.040
and he was, I mean, the contract on the rental house

2051
02:02:43.040 --> 02:02:46.900
ended on April 30th and I got into the new house

2052
02:02:46.900 --> 02:02:50.840
that I purchased on April 30th, 2021.

2053
02:02:51.360 --> 02:02:51.860
So-

2054
02:02:51.860 --> 02:02:53.540
So I think one of the things, Alice,

2055
02:02:53.640 --> 02:02:56.360
one of the things I want to encourage you to do

2056
02:02:56.560 --> 02:02:58.720
is remember earlier when I was talking about

2057
02:02:58.720 --> 02:03:02.820
do it again, ladies, I am hearing you say

2058
02:03:02.840 --> 02:03:06.120
that God financially provided for you

2059
02:03:06.360 --> 02:03:08.300
in multiple times in situations.

2060
02:03:08.300 --> 02:03:10.380
And so we're going to believe for God to do it again,

2061
02:03:10.940 --> 02:03:13.300
but here's where I'm going to encourage you

2062
02:03:13.340 --> 02:03:15.100
to stretch your thinking, okay?

2063
02:03:15.580 --> 02:03:16.120
Okay.

2064
02:03:16.320 --> 02:03:19.680
In the past, which I'm not saying he didn't do it this way,

2065
02:03:19.680 --> 02:03:22.160
but one of the things you said that stood out to me

2066
02:03:22.160 --> 02:03:24.300
is God pulled me through.

2067
02:03:25.260 --> 02:03:27.980
Well, I want God to not just pull you through.

2068
02:03:28.240 --> 02:03:31.120
I want you to be in the, and then some,

2069
02:03:31.480 --> 02:03:34.700
like to be in the overflow where it's not just, you know,

2070
02:03:34.700 --> 02:03:37.280
God pulling kind of a scraping by.

2071
02:03:37.760 --> 02:03:40.300
And I really, literally, I'm going to just pause

2072
02:03:40.300 --> 02:03:41.540
and pray for you here in a minute.

2073
02:03:41.540 --> 02:03:45.540
But one of the things I want to encourage you to ask

2074
02:03:45.540 --> 02:03:52.040
the Lord is, are there any areas, Lord,

2075
02:03:52.100 --> 02:03:55.320
where I need to still shift in my view

2076
02:03:55.320 --> 02:03:57.840
of your provision for me?

2077
02:03:58.100 --> 02:04:00.500
Even though he pulled you through before.

2078
02:04:01.140 --> 02:04:05.660
And what I mean by that is that sometimes

2079
02:04:05.660 --> 02:04:07.920
when we go through situations like that,

2080
02:04:09.440 --> 02:04:13.680
we might believe that all of our life,

2081
02:04:13.680 --> 02:04:15.160
this is going to be how it goes.

2082
02:04:15.160 --> 02:04:16.740
Like we do good for a little while,

2083
02:04:16.940 --> 02:04:19.020
then we're struggling and then have to pull through.

2084
02:04:19.160 --> 02:04:20.680
We'll do good for a little while,

2085
02:04:20.820 --> 02:04:22.660
then we're struggling and have to pull through.

2086
02:04:22.840 --> 02:04:24.700
You see how there's kind of like a cycle

2087
02:04:24.700 --> 02:04:26.000
that's been happening there.

2088
02:04:26.280 --> 02:04:29.740
And so we want to, okay, first,

2089
02:04:30.080 --> 02:04:34.480
is there anything that I can shift?

2090
02:04:34.540 --> 02:04:37.880
And for me, I could always shift the way

2091
02:04:37.880 --> 02:04:39.280
that I looked at money,

2092
02:04:39.400 --> 02:04:41.300
the way I thought about God's provision

2093
02:04:41.300 --> 02:04:45.000
and the orphan mentalities that were in my heart at times

2094
02:04:45.440 --> 02:04:47.140
that caused me to,

2095
02:04:47.280 --> 02:04:48.920
even though I knew God was going to take care of me,

2096
02:04:48.980 --> 02:04:51.200
but there was still an underlying fear.

2097
02:04:53.000 --> 02:04:55.720
Like, why did I even have to be in that spot?

2098
02:04:55.880 --> 02:04:57.820
So like when you lose a job,

2099
02:04:58.060 --> 02:04:59.980
a lot of times what the enemy will assault.

2100
02:05:00.000 --> 02:05:03.760
is like, well, if God was really looking out for you,

2101
02:05:03.840 --> 02:05:05.500
why didn't he give you a different job before you,

2102
02:05:05.640 --> 02:05:07.720
you know, and you left that job, you know,

2103
02:05:07.740 --> 02:05:10.000
see how kind of the enemy will try to get in there.

2104
02:05:10.240 --> 02:05:13.580
But I also just want to speak restitution over you.

2105
02:05:13.580 --> 02:05:15.140
So that's why I want to pray for you.

2106
02:05:15.300 --> 02:05:18.880
And what I want to pray is that, you know,

2107
02:05:18.880 --> 02:05:22.420
all that money that was taken from you and the car

2108
02:05:22.420 --> 02:05:26.940
and all the things that God would give that all back to you.

2109
02:05:27.800 --> 02:05:28.300
Matthew.

2110
02:05:28.780 --> 02:05:30.460
Yeah, so I'm going to pray for you

2111
02:05:30.800 --> 02:05:33.500
and we're believing for healing.

2112
02:05:33.820 --> 02:05:36.680
Make sure even if you've forgiven your ex before

2113
02:05:36.820 --> 02:05:38.720
that you do a forgiveness prayer sheet

2114
02:05:38.720 --> 02:05:40.280
to forgive him for that stuff as well.

2115
02:05:40.400 --> 02:05:42.060
I feel like that's really important, okay?

2116
02:05:42.480 --> 02:05:44.420
Father, thank you so much for Alice.

2117
02:05:44.540 --> 02:05:47.780
God, we thank you for anyone else that needs jobs as well.

2118
02:05:47.920 --> 02:05:49.860
God, that you're going to provide opportunity for them.

2119
02:05:50.080 --> 02:05:52.660
God, that you're going to open doors wide open.

2120
02:05:52.900 --> 02:05:54.740
God, that you're going to put their name

2121
02:05:54.920 --> 02:05:56.340
on minds and hearts of people.

2122
02:05:56.340 --> 02:05:59.280
God, that there's going to be a supernatural transformation.

2123
02:05:59.740 --> 02:06:02.460
But God, we're asking you tonight to bring restitution

2124
02:06:02.940 --> 02:06:05.420
to this situation in the past, God,

2125
02:06:05.420 --> 02:06:08.500
that you would literally not just restore the money,

2126
02:06:08.660 --> 02:06:12.140
but God, that it would be paid in full and then some,

2127
02:06:12.180 --> 02:06:15.420
that in the spirit realm where that money was taken

2128
02:06:15.420 --> 02:06:18.720
through the enemy, through her ex in the car

2129
02:06:18.720 --> 02:06:20.060
and all of the things, God,

2130
02:06:20.060 --> 02:06:24.160
that you would supernaturally return

2131
02:06:24.160 --> 02:06:26.320
and restore that back onto Alice, God,

2132
02:06:26.660 --> 02:06:30.220
that you would just fill her storehouse to overflowing.

2133
02:06:30.460 --> 02:06:33.080
God, that supernatural groceries would appear.

2134
02:06:33.740 --> 02:06:35.820
God, that people would give her gift cards, God,

2135
02:06:35.880 --> 02:06:39.280
and just that she would start to experience the fullness

2136
02:06:39.840 --> 02:06:41.900
of the revelation of God,

2137
02:06:41.900 --> 02:06:44.060
that everything that is yours is hers,

2138
02:06:44.120 --> 02:06:45.740
that she's a princess, God.

2139
02:06:45.740 --> 02:06:47.920
And so I pray, God, that you would help her

2140
02:06:47.920 --> 02:06:50.060
to continue to shift on the inside.

2141
02:06:50.180 --> 02:06:52.220
And then as she shifts on the inside, God,

2142
02:06:52.220 --> 02:06:54.180
that it will impact things on the outside.

2143
02:06:54.680 --> 02:06:58.100
And Lord, I know that she said she's got one month left,

2144
02:06:58.500 --> 02:06:59.900
but God, I thank you, God,

2145
02:07:00.000 --> 02:07:02.520
that you will just remove any fear, any doubt,

2146
02:07:03.100 --> 02:07:05.660
any unbelief, God, and that you would just continue

2147
02:07:06.340 --> 02:07:09.160
to reveal your grace to her in every moment, God,

2148
02:07:09.180 --> 02:07:12.040
that you would just give her an impartation

2149
02:07:12.040 --> 02:07:15.780
of the gift of faith to believe for more than enough, God.

2150
02:07:15.780 --> 02:07:19.400
And we just believe all these things in Jesus' name.

2151
02:07:19.920 --> 02:07:21.120
Amen, amen, amen.

2152
02:07:21.120 --> 02:07:22.720
So ladies, let's partner with faith

2153
02:07:22.720 --> 02:07:24.380
no matter what we're believing for,

2154
02:07:25.040 --> 02:07:27.400
and God is working in your life,

2155
02:07:27.460 --> 02:07:29.460
and I believe he's gonna work, Alice, in this situation.

2156
02:07:29.600 --> 02:07:31.760
I can't wait to hear what happens.

2157
02:07:32.560 --> 02:07:33.880
Thank you, thank you so much.

2158
02:07:34.180 --> 02:07:34.740
You're welcome.

2159
02:07:35.060 --> 02:07:36.540
Catherine Clark, go ahead.

2160
02:07:40.460 --> 02:07:42.260
For me, there's a few things,

2161
02:07:43.260 --> 02:07:46.300
one of which is crippling debt,

2162
02:07:46.560 --> 02:07:48.260
which is the student loan debts.

2163
02:07:48.260 --> 02:07:51.940
I say all the time, if I could declare bankruptcy on it,

2164
02:07:52.080 --> 02:07:52.540
I would.

2165
02:07:53.580 --> 02:07:55.000
I love my mom.

2166
02:07:55.300 --> 02:07:56.900
I trusted my mom back then.

2167
02:07:57.020 --> 02:07:59.880
I thought, oh, she knows what she's doing and all of that.

2168
02:07:59.920 --> 02:08:04.880
And I find myself like upset with her in a way

2169
02:08:04.880 --> 02:08:09.100
of like, why didn't you just have my dad

2170
02:08:09.180 --> 02:08:11.260
help me pay for college?

2171
02:08:11.540 --> 02:08:13.940
Or if I had known you were gonna have me

2172
02:08:13.940 --> 02:08:15.140
take out all these loans,

2173
02:08:15.140 --> 02:08:18.900
that there is no way I can pay them back.

2174
02:08:18.980 --> 02:08:20.320
And I'm really praying for God

2175
02:08:20.320 --> 02:08:23.160
to just supernaturally wipe them

2176
02:08:23.160 --> 02:08:25.960
because there is no way on earth I can pay them back,

2177
02:08:26.140 --> 02:08:28.420
especially as a single mom, not making that much.

2178
02:08:30.880 --> 02:08:32.700
But I'm like thinking to myself,

2179
02:08:32.740 --> 02:08:34.740
like I would have looked at different colleges.

2180
02:08:34.740 --> 02:08:36.840
I would have looked at more affordable ones.

2181
02:08:37.160 --> 02:08:40.620
If I had known she was gonna have me take out all this debt,

2182
02:08:41.180 --> 02:08:44.140
and I promised myself and I vowed to myself

2183
02:08:44.140 --> 02:08:47.020
that I am never putting my son in this situation

2184
02:08:47.880 --> 02:08:51.020
because it's like 80 something thousand dollars

2185
02:08:51.020 --> 02:08:53.460
worth of debt that there's no way.

2186
02:08:53.740 --> 02:08:56.900
Like I really, I feel like calling them and saying,

2187
02:08:57.000 --> 02:08:58.360
can we just forgive it?

2188
02:08:58.360 --> 02:09:01.440
Because there's no way I'm gonna be able to pay it.

2189
02:09:01.440 --> 02:09:03.640
So that keeps me up at night.

2190
02:09:03.640 --> 02:09:06.780
Cause that's the one thing that's bothering me

2191
02:09:06.780 --> 02:09:09.800
with my finances, besides the fact too,

2192
02:09:09.800 --> 02:09:12.780
that somebody was in my lane,

2193
02:09:14.380 --> 02:09:18.460
totaled my car over three years ago.

2194
02:09:19.140 --> 02:09:21.560
And I have a car payment for another four years

2195
02:09:21.560 --> 02:09:24.380
that I'm like, oh man, I had a car that was paid off.

2196
02:09:24.620 --> 02:09:26.560
Like, and this is the one bill as well.

2197
02:09:26.640 --> 02:09:27.840
Like I can't change.

2198
02:09:28.680 --> 02:09:32.200
And man, I would have been more free financially

2199
02:09:32.200 --> 02:09:35.200
if the student loan was gone and if that was gone.

2200
02:09:35.660 --> 02:09:37.540
And then of course the last thing

2201
02:09:37.540 --> 02:09:39.760
is just surrendering the people pleasing.

2202
02:09:40.140 --> 02:09:42.960
I'm finding I really am at the point of

2203
02:09:42.960 --> 02:09:44.860
these are the boundaries I need to have.

2204
02:09:45.600 --> 02:09:47.200
These are the boundaries I want.

2205
02:09:47.580 --> 02:09:49.720
And God is showing me every step of the way

2206
02:09:49.720 --> 02:09:52.220
why they're the right ones to protect myself.

2207
02:09:52.480 --> 02:09:55.980
Because I've been through a lot with a divorce,

2208
02:09:56.440 --> 02:09:59.920
with friends that also took money from me.

2209
02:10:00.000 --> 02:10:03.900
bled me dry, they were using me and just all of that.

2210
02:10:04.380 --> 02:10:06.960
So it's like kind of a lot of the stuff I was going through.

2211
02:10:07.300 --> 02:10:08.760
Well, thank you for sharing.

2212
02:10:09.220 --> 02:10:10.520
Appreciate you sharing and opening up

2213
02:10:10.520 --> 02:10:12.140
and trusting us with all of this.

2214
02:10:12.900 --> 02:10:17.020
A couple things, definitely forgiving your mom.

2215
02:10:17.140 --> 02:10:18.700
Have you done a forgiveness prayer sheet

2216
02:10:18.700 --> 02:10:21.020
regarding your mom and the school loans

2217
02:10:21.020 --> 02:10:22.320
and the debt and all of that?

2218
02:10:23.180 --> 02:10:26.600
I definitely think that's what I'm going to be doing.

2219
02:10:26.600 --> 02:10:28.420
Cause like I started looking at those sheets

2220
02:10:28.420 --> 02:10:30.220
that, oh, a hundred percent

2221
02:10:30.840 --> 02:10:32.980
because it's forgiving her for that.

2222
02:10:33.000 --> 02:10:35.480
And then it's also forgiving her for the recent thing

2223
02:10:35.480 --> 02:10:38.220
that was like the last store that got me to relocate

2224
02:10:38.220 --> 02:10:40.360
from Long Island to upstate New York.

2225
02:10:40.680 --> 02:10:44.540
And that is, I'm mad at her for selling

2226
02:10:44.560 --> 02:10:47.600
half of my inheritance that she's selling now.

2227
02:10:48.080 --> 02:10:49.340
So it's both of those.

2228
02:10:49.920 --> 02:10:50.160
Yeah.

2229
02:10:50.820 --> 02:10:53.220
So here's something that is really important,

2230
02:10:53.740 --> 02:10:55.540
Catherine and everybody else, okay?

2231
02:10:57.920 --> 02:11:00.340
We have to own our side of the street.

2232
02:11:01.600 --> 02:11:06.580
So even as a young adult and your mom or dad

2233
02:11:06.580 --> 02:11:08.780
or whoever encouraged you to go to college

2234
02:11:08.780 --> 02:11:13.840
and did all of that, you still had a choice, okay?

2235
02:11:13.920 --> 02:11:15.540
And it's really important.

2236
02:11:15.680 --> 02:11:18.120
And I'm not putting any kind of blame on you.

2237
02:11:18.340 --> 02:11:20.160
You may need to forgive yourself as well

2238
02:11:20.300 --> 02:11:24.380
for going to college and going down that road

2239
02:11:24.380 --> 02:11:25.520
if you're in that situation.

2240
02:11:25.520 --> 02:11:25.880
If you're in that place

2241
02:11:25.880 --> 02:11:28.040
where you really feel like you regret it.

2242
02:11:28.500 --> 02:11:30.600
But it's really important for us

2243
02:11:30.600 --> 02:11:32.700
to not put everything on other people

2244
02:11:32.820 --> 02:11:35.920
because then we literally lose all of our power.

2245
02:11:36.280 --> 02:11:38.420
Like if we just do everything

2246
02:11:38.420 --> 02:11:40.500
because somebody else made us do it,

2247
02:11:40.500 --> 02:11:42.600
well, where do we own anything?

2248
02:11:42.760 --> 02:11:45.260
Where is our confidence in our decisions?

2249
02:11:46.120 --> 02:11:48.460
And even if we make an unhealthy decision

2250
02:11:48.460 --> 02:11:52.500
that we can own it and forgive ourselves and move forward.

2251
02:11:52.960 --> 02:11:54.880
But if we don't, then what happens

2252
02:11:54.880 --> 02:11:56.320
is we get stuck in a cycle

2253
02:11:56.320 --> 02:11:58.360
where we just keep blaming everybody else.

2254
02:11:58.660 --> 02:12:00.480
Remember, I don't know if it was a couple of weeks ago

2255
02:12:00.480 --> 02:12:04.620
and I talked about victim, survivor, and thriver.

2256
02:12:04.760 --> 02:12:06.680
You guys can go back and listen to that session.

2257
02:12:07.480 --> 02:12:10.640
But right now, and I understand why, Catherine,

2258
02:12:10.700 --> 02:12:12.240
I know that debt can be overwhelming.

2259
02:12:12.440 --> 02:12:16.580
I've had a lot of debt from school loans as well.

2260
02:12:17.380 --> 02:12:19.320
And I don't know if this is my night

2261
02:12:19.480 --> 02:12:21.920
to encourage you all to have faith about money or what,

2262
02:12:22.040 --> 02:12:23.380
but I'll tell you what,

2263
02:12:23.380 --> 02:12:24.660
I remember Brian and I,

2264
02:12:24.740 --> 02:12:26.260
one of the first conversations we had

2265
02:12:26.260 --> 02:12:27.760
about his school loan debt.

2266
02:12:28.360 --> 02:12:31.920
And his is, I mean, y'all, he's got a doctorate.

2267
02:12:31.960 --> 02:12:33.340
He's got a master's.

2268
02:12:33.520 --> 02:12:34.160
He's got a bachelor's.

2269
02:12:34.240 --> 02:12:37.160
I mean, like he went to school for a long time.

2270
02:12:37.360 --> 02:12:38.320
He's got a lot of debt.

2271
02:12:39.680 --> 02:12:42.620
And he said to me, I'm never gonna be able to pay that off.

2272
02:12:42.680 --> 02:12:44.380
I said, don't you dare ever say that.

2273
02:12:44.620 --> 02:12:46.020
We are gonna pay this off.

2274
02:12:46.220 --> 02:12:48.200
God's gonna supernaturally provide the money

2275
02:12:48.260 --> 02:12:50.160
and we're gonna pay all that school debt off.

2276
02:12:50.460 --> 02:12:52.300
And y'all, guess what's on my Jesus Cares Board?

2277
02:12:52.300 --> 02:12:53.480
I'm not joking.

2278
02:12:54.020 --> 02:12:56.780
I believe that God can provide that for us.

2279
02:12:56.820 --> 02:12:58.800
I don't have to be in debt the rest of my life.

2280
02:12:59.420 --> 02:13:01.860
No matter if I was a single mom, I was single before.

2281
02:13:02.320 --> 02:13:04.100
And y'all, I didn't know how I was gonna pay

2282
02:13:04.100 --> 02:13:04.700
for an apartment.

2283
02:13:04.860 --> 02:13:06.820
I didn't know how I was gonna pay for groceries sometimes,

2284
02:13:06.940 --> 02:13:08.960
but I just started believing God.

2285
02:13:09.360 --> 02:13:11.120
I trust that as you heal my heart,

2286
02:13:11.220 --> 02:13:13.360
you're gonna teach me how to handle money better.

2287
02:13:13.960 --> 02:13:15.420
I'm gonna become a better steward

2288
02:13:15.500 --> 02:13:17.400
that you're gonna be able to give me stuff

2289
02:13:17.400 --> 02:13:19.400
and not just go through the holes in my pocket

2290
02:13:19.400 --> 02:13:20.240
and me give it away.

2291
02:13:20.240 --> 02:13:23.040
So one of the other things is when I was dating

2292
02:13:23.040 --> 02:13:26.200
the girl's dad, y'all, I gave him tons of money.

2293
02:13:26.300 --> 02:13:28.680
I gave him, I paid for car payments,

2294
02:13:28.680 --> 02:13:31.240
I paid for part of the house, I paid for groceries.

2295
02:13:32.640 --> 02:13:35.700
So was it that I didn't have money

2296
02:13:36.060 --> 02:13:40.380
or was it that I was making choices that weren't good?

2297
02:13:41.940 --> 02:13:45.400
Okay, so I had to own my side of the street

2298
02:13:45.520 --> 02:13:47.440
regarding my financial situation.

2299
02:13:48.580 --> 02:13:52.080
Y'all, I literally ended up having to go to a food bank

2300
02:13:52.080 --> 02:13:55.040
with him at one point because the finance,

2301
02:13:55.160 --> 02:13:59.300
my finances got so out of whack and his were never good.

2302
02:14:00.600 --> 02:14:03.700
That was a very tough dynamic.

2303
02:14:04.040 --> 02:14:06.480
That was very embarrassing and hard for me

2304
02:14:06.780 --> 02:14:09.320
and had to let go of all kinds of pride

2305
02:14:09.380 --> 02:14:11.000
and ego and all the things.

2306
02:14:12.080 --> 02:14:14.620
But y'all better believe that I figured out

2307
02:14:14.620 --> 02:14:16.120
how to get my stuff back on track.

2308
02:14:16.120 --> 02:14:19.160
And part of it was like setting boundaries

2309
02:14:19.160 --> 02:14:21.460
and not continuing to pay for things

2310
02:14:22.360 --> 02:14:24.380
that were his responsibility to pay for.

2311
02:14:25.120 --> 02:14:27.880
So we need to get boundaries in place.

2312
02:14:28.000 --> 02:14:30.400
We need to work on forgiving people.

2313
02:14:32.160 --> 02:14:34.920
Again, I understand that your parents encouraged you,

2314
02:14:35.620 --> 02:14:38.140
but as a young adult, you still chose.

2315
02:14:39.080 --> 02:14:42.320
And so owning that decision for yourself

2316
02:14:42.320 --> 02:14:45.600
is the starting point for you, Catherine.

2317
02:14:46.680 --> 02:14:49.400
And I wanna encourage you, again, I understand

2318
02:14:49.400 --> 02:14:51.480
it can look like this huge mountain of debt

2319
02:14:51.480 --> 02:14:54.960
and there's no end in sight, but partnering with,

2320
02:14:55.160 --> 02:14:56.400
I'm never gonna pay this off.

2321
02:14:56.480 --> 02:14:57.260
I can never do it.

2322
02:14:57.260 --> 02:14:58.000
I can never do it.

2323
02:14:58.000 --> 02:14:59.980
That isn't gonna help the situation.

2324
02:15:00.000 --> 02:15:08.540
by any means. So, let's sit in a posture of, God, I believe, help my unbelief. Help me

2325
02:15:08.540 --> 02:15:15.140
to see how I can start to save money and start to pay these bills down and trust that, God,

2326
02:15:15.200 --> 02:15:18.940
you're going to work it all together for good. Because you don't know what's coming down

2327
02:15:18.940 --> 02:15:24.800
the road for you. But if you partner that it can never happen and that God can't bring

2328
02:15:24.800 --> 02:15:31.080
increase into your life, then that is going to be your lot. Does that make sense, everyone?

2329
02:15:32.620 --> 02:15:36.520
Yes, it does. Yeah, it's really important. And I'm not trying to be hard on you. So I

2330
02:15:36.520 --> 02:15:41.780
hope you know, I'm saying this out of love and out of a place of I had to overcome a

2331
02:15:41.780 --> 02:15:47.440
lot myself. But God is helping me do it. And you all we are paying off, like literally

2332
02:15:47.440 --> 02:15:52.040
the only debt we have left our school loans. And we're like in the middle of paying that

2333
02:15:52.040 --> 02:15:55.620
off. Well, I shouldn't say that we just got dental work, but so we're gonna pay that

2334
02:15:55.620 --> 02:16:01.600
off too. But like God is giving us the finances supernaturally to pay this stuff. He's increasing

2335
02:16:01.700 --> 02:16:07.080
and doing things in our lives. And years ago, I would have never thought that was possible.

2336
02:16:07.340 --> 02:16:13.680
I really didn't. But God's doing something awesome. So he can do it for you too.

2337
02:16:14.340 --> 02:16:18.160
Yeah, that I definitely needed to hear because it definitely seems like that. And even with

2338
02:16:18.160 --> 02:16:26.360
what you were saying about paying that girl's dad stuff, like I was wrong with those bad

2339
02:16:26.360 --> 02:16:32.780
friends of paying for things for them back then. And obviously, we're not friends anymore,

2340
02:16:32.780 --> 02:16:36.500
because I stood up for that. And they didn't like it. They decided the friendship is over,

2341
02:16:37.379 --> 02:16:41.940
which I'm better off. I don't need users like that either.

2342
02:16:42.440 --> 02:16:46.879
No, you don't. And you know, again, forgiving yourself even regarding giving those friends

2343
02:16:46.879 --> 02:16:51.879
money. You know, God wants to restore even those things to us, ladies. So even when we

2344
02:16:51.879 --> 02:16:58.120
make mistakes, he's not like trying to punish you, Catherine. Okay. So let's forgive those

2345
02:16:58.120 --> 02:17:03.240
friends, forgive your mom, forgive your dad, forgive yourself. Let's work on those forgiveness

2346
02:17:03.240 --> 02:17:07.780
sheets this week. Okay. And let's see what starts to shift as well. And we're going to

2347
02:17:07.780 --> 02:17:13.200
be praying again, come to the prayer calls as much as you all can. And really just soak

2348
02:17:13.200 --> 02:17:19.160
in and allow your faith to just be really built up. Okay, super important. Thank you

2349
02:17:19.160 --> 02:17:25.040
for sharing and trusting us. Thank you, too. You're welcome. Stacy. See, go ahead.

2350
02:17:26.980 --> 02:17:29.879
Hi, I just wanted to say a couple of things as we wrap up here. I don't want to take much

2351
02:17:29.879 --> 02:17:33.340
time. I was going to talk about a couple of things with me. But I think I'll do that next

2352
02:17:33.340 --> 02:17:37.879
Monday. But I did want to say if I might I'm new. So hopefully this is all welcome. Good

2353
02:17:37.879 --> 02:17:44.540
to go. But I wanted to respond to crystal. I am 58. So I'm in a similar age bracket.

2354
02:17:44.540 --> 02:17:48.879
And I understand the idea of coming home being alone on Sunday sometimes. So I'd like to

2355
02:17:48.879 --> 02:17:52.700
invite you to have a zoom with me once in a while. Because we're in the same age bracket.

2356
02:17:53.059 --> 02:18:00.580
And I will say this not to be unkind to anybody in the group. But there's a different feeling

2357
02:18:00.580 --> 02:18:06.139
when you get into your late 50s, maybe early 60s that I don't think people understand at

2358
02:18:06.139 --> 02:18:11.100
30 and 40. Nothing personal to younger folks. But it's just kind of the journey. And there's

2359
02:18:11.400 --> 02:18:15.040
an understanding, I think when you get into a certain age group with other people and

2360
02:18:15.040 --> 02:18:18.799
stuff. So anyway, crystal, I'd like to connect with you. And then Catherine, I just wanted

2361
02:18:18.799 --> 02:18:22.200
to say I don't know if that was Catherine who just spoke about the student loans. I

2362
02:18:22.200 --> 02:18:27.299
just want to was that Catherine? It was but I'm gonna have you pause for a second. Okay,

2363
02:18:27.299 --> 02:18:34.139
I would love to hear something about you. Oh, about me about you. Oh, okay. Well, I

2364
02:18:34.139 --> 02:18:39.559
haven't I just joined last year single and I have not gotten started. It's been two weeks.

2365
02:18:40.320 --> 02:18:44.520
I've had some things going on. This was a challenging week with everything having to

2366
02:18:44.520 --> 02:18:49.760
do with the the news. So I haven't dug in yet. But I've done other hard work in the

2367
02:18:50.180 --> 02:19:02.139
past. That's okay. So what is something you're going to surrender tonight? I got kicked off

2368
02:19:02.139 --> 02:19:06.780
the group. So I didn't I didn't exactly hear what the question was. That's okay. So the

2369
02:19:06.780 --> 02:19:11.879
question is, what is something through all the coaching that I did tonight in the lesson

2370
02:19:11.879 --> 02:19:19.180
kind of unpacking that? What is something God is nudging you to surrender tonight? That's

2371
02:19:19.180 --> 02:19:30.620
it. It might be this little kitty that I rescued. Okay. Yeah. All right. Awesome. So maybe, um,

2372
02:19:30.620 --> 02:19:38.160
do you have a desire to help people and animals? Maybe? Yeah, I got a little kitty who's been

2373
02:19:38.160 --> 02:19:43.360
living in my trailer in the last couple months, took him to the vet today, and had some work

2374
02:19:43.360 --> 02:19:47.559
done to see if the kitty could assimilate with my existing senior cats. And the vet

2375
02:19:47.559 --> 02:19:52.300
was an agreement, not a good idea to bring this younger cat in to the mix. And I was

2376
02:19:52.300 --> 02:19:56.760
like, I was afraid of that. And so I think I'm gonna have to make a decision now what

2377
02:19:56.760 --> 02:19:59.860
the next steps are. And so that's a little painful, because I'm gonna

2378
02:20:00.000 --> 02:20:04.900
attached a little guy, but I may have to surrender him. So we'll see.

2379
02:20:06.040 --> 02:20:12.260
All right. Well on that, um, I think one of the biggest things, ladies, the reason I had her is

2380
02:20:12.260 --> 02:20:15.860
not that I don't want her to edify some other people in here, but it's really important when

2381
02:20:15.860 --> 02:20:21.100
you all get into, uh, the seat and she wouldn't know this since this is her first time. So I'm

2382
02:20:21.100 --> 02:20:25.840
just making sure that everybody does know the reason we do this group coaching is for you to

2383
02:20:25.920 --> 02:20:30.260
move forward in your healing. Even if you haven't been able to work on the material for that week,

2384
02:20:30.420 --> 02:20:35.420
kind of like even Tiffany was saying she's in week one and that's totally fine, but you all can

2385
02:20:35.420 --> 02:20:42.160
share what God is, is showing you in your heart and receive the coaching that you personally need.

2386
02:20:42.540 --> 02:20:49.340
Um, cause again, it's really important that as a giver that we're not just giving, giving,

2387
02:20:49.600 --> 02:20:54.840
giving to other people and then actually not getting the help that we need because we're

2388
02:20:54.840 --> 02:21:00.920
helping other people. Um, so I appreciate Stacy, you encouraging your sisters. Um, I will say this,

2389
02:21:01.120 --> 02:21:08.260
you know, um, I mean, I wasn't in my fifties, but I was definitely in my mid forties. And so

2390
02:21:08.260 --> 02:21:14.620
dating is definitely different as you get older, but I just want to make sure that, um, our ladies

2391
02:21:14.620 --> 02:21:20.120
that are older also aren't partnering with flies because yeah, it might be different, but that

2392
02:21:20.380 --> 02:21:26.680
doesn't mean other people don't feel deep loneliness. And so it's kind of like isolating

2393
02:21:26.680 --> 02:21:31.420
yourself because of your age. We have ladies in their seventies and eighties getting married. Y'all.

2394
02:21:31.500 --> 02:21:35.500
No, I would agree with that a hundred percent. What I was really trying to say, not in terms

2395
02:21:35.500 --> 02:21:40.760
of relationships so much or partners were romantic. I was more saying that when you are single, as you

2396
02:21:40.760 --> 02:21:44.720
get older, there is, there is a level of loneliness, especially if you've been married before. And then

2397
02:21:44.720 --> 02:21:53.040
you're alone. It just, I don't know. I it's just something that I can relate to. I guess what I'm

2398
02:21:53.040 --> 02:21:58.620
trying to say. Yeah. Yeah. But we need to look at what is the root of that loneliness. It isn't just

2399
02:21:58.640 --> 02:22:04.620
age ladies. That's what I'm getting at. Okay. I hear what you're saying, but I'm, I'm lovingly

2400
02:22:04.620 --> 02:22:10.600
challenging that as well, because that's in us because somewhere along the way we were lonely

2401
02:22:10.600 --> 02:22:18.720
before and we were wounded because of it. So for me, I was literally neglected as a kid, as a little

2402
02:22:18.720 --> 02:22:26.440
girl. And so when I got older, that, that pangs of loneliness that I dealt with was massive. You all

2403
02:22:28.100 --> 02:22:34.600
like painful. And so that's why I'm trying to say, I think that, yeah, there's different seasons and

2404
02:22:34.600 --> 02:22:41.700
things in different ways. I had never felt that level of loneliness before in my life.

2405
02:22:42.120 --> 02:22:48.360
And when I studied up on it and learned about it, it can be way more addicting than even cocaine,

2406
02:22:48.660 --> 02:22:55.720
that feeling of needing to have somebody there to satisfy the loneliness. But what God told me

2407
02:22:55.720 --> 02:23:03.420
is that I had to learn how to actually recognize that I fill a room and I'm not trying to minimize

2408
02:23:03.420 --> 02:23:08.620
our loneliness, but the reality is, is I had to really like embrace my fullness.

2409
02:23:09.600 --> 02:23:15.780
And the fact that when I come into a room, I fill that place. That room isn't empty because

2410
02:23:15.780 --> 02:23:21.900
someone else isn't there with me. It's full because I'm there and Christ is in me filling

2411
02:23:21.900 --> 02:23:27.380
that place. And so when I was able to receive that truth and really live into that minute,

2412
02:23:27.380 --> 02:23:33.100
changed how I viewed everything. It changed how I felt when I was by myself.

2413
02:23:34.880 --> 02:23:40.220
And I, you all, I never like, I couldn't like, and I'm not saying this to tell myself. I actually

2414
02:23:40.220 --> 02:23:45.680
wish I had not always had to have a boyfriend, but I didn't know growing up how to not have a

2415
02:23:47.360 --> 02:23:53.000
boyfriend. And so God taught me how to walk out singleness and not feel like I was lacking

2416
02:23:53.000 --> 02:24:01.180
something. And so that's what I just want to give to you all. Okay. I had to really get to the root

2417
02:24:01.180 --> 02:24:07.680
of where did that loneliness start for me? Because man, when I went through all of that and I finally

2418
02:24:07.780 --> 02:24:13.640
allowed myself to experience singleness and not try to fill it with another person,

2419
02:24:14.500 --> 02:24:20.140
the pain that I felt was legit, but I had to look at, okay, where did this come from?

2420
02:24:20.780 --> 02:24:27.460
So that's what I'm saying to you. Okay. So when we feel that let's not stay there, but let's ask

2421
02:24:27.460 --> 02:24:33.240
the Lord. Okay. What is the root of this? Is it just that I feel lonely right now, or is there

2422
02:24:33.240 --> 02:24:39.660
a pain in me from the past that needs tending to that God wants to come in and heal me and deliver

2423
02:24:39.660 --> 02:24:45.320
me from. All right. Super important ladies. Okay. All right. I'm going to pray us out. Father.

2424
02:24:45.320 --> 02:24:51.360
Thanks so much for everything. God, you're so, so good. God, I thank you that you would help

2425
02:24:51.380 --> 02:24:57.980
every lady tonight receive sale arrest and God that they would hear what your spirit is saying

2426
02:24:57.980 --> 02:24:59.980
to them in the night hours, in the day hours.

2427
02:25:00.000 --> 02:25:02.720
God, we thank you that you would just come in

2428
02:25:02.720 --> 02:25:05.140
and place the balm of Gilead upon every wound.

2429
02:25:05.780 --> 02:25:07.800
God, that you would go into the depths of loneliness

2430
02:25:08.000 --> 02:25:10.540
and deliver them and set them free, God.

2431
02:25:10.700 --> 02:25:13.560
And not only that, but that you would fill them up

2432
02:25:13.560 --> 02:25:15.800
with your presence, God, in a fresh way.

2433
02:25:16.280 --> 02:25:18.660
God, we thank you that you would send people to them

2434
02:25:19.220 --> 02:25:23.920
to just join them for lunch spontaneously, Lord,

2435
02:25:24.260 --> 02:25:27.080
or just, Lord, sending new friends into their lives

2436
02:25:27.080 --> 02:25:29.680
where they have friends that are no longer in their lives

2437
02:25:29.680 --> 02:25:30.860
that weren't healthy for them.

2438
02:25:31.100 --> 02:25:32.720
So, Lord, we thank you for your hydra protection

2439
02:25:32.720 --> 02:25:33.700
around us as well.

2440
02:25:34.300 --> 02:25:36.160
We thank you that you would guard and keep watch over us,

2441
02:25:36.260 --> 02:25:38.140
that you would help us to also take part

2442
02:25:38.460 --> 02:25:40.600
in guarding our hearts and our minds through Christ Jesus.

2443
02:25:40.780 --> 02:25:42.520
We thank you, God, for revealings for healing

2444
02:25:42.520 --> 02:25:44.480
that are happening, that will happen,

2445
02:25:44.680 --> 02:25:47.800
and for freedom and breakthrough coming in Jesus' name.

2446
02:25:48.120 --> 02:25:48.540
Amen.

2447
02:25:48.740 --> 02:25:49.600
God bless you all.

2448
02:25:49.700 --> 02:25:51.480
Have a wonderful night, everyone.

2449
02:25:52.080 --> 02:25:52.120
Good night.

2450
02:25:52.140 --> 02:25:52.540
Love you.

2451
02:25:52.600 --> 02:25:53.260
See you in the group.

2452
02:25:53.340 --> 02:25:53.940
Good night.

2453
02:25:53.940 --> 02:25:54.560
Love you.