WEBVTT

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It's good to be back.

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I'm so glad to be back and I will be back for specific things.

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And so I am, as you can see, in a car.

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I'm out in California.

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I had some business meetings that I needed to get to and I got out here to go to those

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meetings and they went really well.

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And what does that mean?

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That means there's an expansion upon us of this movement and the people that we serve.

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And so very excited to give all the details of that.

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We'll probably be announcing all of the new things that we have to offer people in the

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area and realm of their relationships at our anniversary party.

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Can you believe it's already October?

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It's already October.

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I can't believe it.

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And we will be gathering to celebrate five years of love, five years of the supernatural,

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five years of God's grace.

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And that's what the number five means over this movement.

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Married in 12 Months or Less, last year's single, it is going to be amazing.

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And that is going to be happening in Austin, Texas.

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We will be going live different parts of the night, especially like during the speeches

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or during any kind of announcements, we'll have a live stream.

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We won't be going live during like the party, dancing, the DJ, all that stuff.

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We won't be going live during that.

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We will be going live during the portions of it that would be pertinent to all of you

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that are not there.

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And so we're excited about that.

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Tonight's session is one of my favorite sessions.

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I started doing this a mazillion years ago, I feel like.

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It was actually only five years ago.

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Did you guys know that I used to be the only coach?

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I used to be the only person, the only leader in Married in 12 Months or Less, that's what

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it was called five years ago.

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And now it is called Last Year's Single.

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It's been called Last Year's Single for about the last three years of those five years.

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And I used to be the only one.

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So I would go live several times a week.

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Some of you probably remember those days.

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I know Erin Joy remembers those days.

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And it just used to be me.

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We used to have like Mask Monday.

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It used to be just ladies.

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We didn't, we didn't, we had co-ed stuff.

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We had co-ed gatherings, but we didn't necessarily have the men in our stuff like this.

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We didn't have, we didn't invite the guys to that kind of stuff.

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So we put on our masks, like our face masks, you know.

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It wasn't like Mask Monday, like get your Halloween mask out.

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It was like put on your face mask, you know, like your beauty mask, your cucumber mask,

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whatever.

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And we would talk.

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And I will tell you, one of those nights we talked so long, I left that mask on so long

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that it gave me a rash, right?

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It was not good.

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I remember that night.

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But there's just so many things.

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There's so much that we could get nostalgic about, that we could reminisce about.

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We've had so many success stories.

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We've helped so many people get healing in their hearts and reconciliation in their relationship

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with God and themselves and others.

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And it's just been a really wild ride.

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And I believe that we're just getting started.

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We have a beautiful team now of volunteers and moderators and single city leaders and

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coaches and administrative team members and just everything you can think of.

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And it is a small team, but it's a mighty team.

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And I'm glad that it's not just me anymore, because that was a lot of work, which is why

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I needed a sabbatical.

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I kind of burnt myself out a little bit.

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And when you're used to running at high capacity and high octane, you don't really notice that

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you're burnt out.

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But my little gallbladder was like, hey, you're burnt out.

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And so for those of you that have been praying for me, thank you so much.

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I'm about 85% better.

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In fact, I ate meat for the first time yesterday, and I did not have any kind of negative reaction

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to it.

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I haven't been able to eat meat in months.

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And so thank you for your prayers, because I'm wasting away over here, y'all.

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I lost 20 pounds.

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I mean, I'm not being funny.

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I lost 20 pounds.

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And yeah, and probably a lot of muscle.

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So I'm on Ozempy without being on Ozempy.

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Hello?

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I promise you, I'm sure people are going to see me from afar.

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They'd be like, oh, Jackie's on the Ozempy.

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She's on the GLP-1.

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And there's nothing wrong with that if you're on it.

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I'm just saying I'm not, and they're probably going to think that I was.

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But that's okay.

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That's all right.

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Sometimes prayers get answered in the weirdest ways.

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God did not dysfunction my gallbladder.

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I want to make sure I say that right away before someone writes in and says, did you

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say God made you sick?

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No, he didn't make me sick.

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I made me sick by not respecting my own limitations and capacity and boundaries.

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And when you're a builder and entrepreneur,

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It's really easy to ignore the engine light on your car.

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And so I'm very thankful that God is full of grace and mercy and he allowed me to get

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ahead of whatever was going on with me, hormone replacement and gallbladder dyskinesia and

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all the different things.

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For those of you that are wondering, I didn't have stones.

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I didn't have any situation that caused me to have to remove my gallbladder.

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I had some dysfunction of my gallbladder.

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I had a colicky gallbladder caused more by hormones is what the hypothesis is.

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There's no real conclusive evidence.

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All the tests came back inconclusive.

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The good news is that none of the tests showed anything seriously wrong.

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Okay, so that is good and that is good news.

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So a huge change in diet, a very huge restriction in the volume of food that I'm able to eat,

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but also in the kinds of food.

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Guys, I found out through this process that I actually have a severe reaction to eggs,

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to dairy, to corn, to salmon.

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I've never liked shellfish like shrimp and stuff like that and I guess it's a good thing

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because I have a severe reaction to those things.

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I have a mild, more moderate reaction to things like avocado and things that I eat every day.

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In fact, I said to the doctor, I said, I eat eggs all the time.

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I don't notice anything and she said, oh, you won't notice it until you stop eating

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them and you realize that all the inflammation in your body goes away and your joints stop

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hurting and this stops hurting and that stops hurting.

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I'm like, oh my gosh, Lord, but you guys, there's no alternative.

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Getting old is the only alternative that we have because we don't like the other alternative,

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right?

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So thankfully we get to age with grace and mercy, but God has, I had been praying for

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at least three years that I would be able to get healthy, that I would be able to lose

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weight.

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I hadn't, I gained a lot of weight after my mom passed away and then I went into menopause.

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I wasn't able to lose any and so kind of the magic bullet of this situation just killed

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all the birds with one stone, right?

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I was able to lose 20 pounds, not a fun way.

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I wouldn't recommend it, definitely not, but it did happen and I'm thankful.

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That's kind of my Romans 828 moment, right?

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My working all things to the good is great and so thank God for it.

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All right, so that is the update on me.

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I know a lot of you have been asking, thank you for praying for me.

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I appreciate it.

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Keep praying for me.

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I'm 85% better.

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I would like to be 100% better and I feel like that is happening soon.

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I'm getting better every day and so thank you guys for that.

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For those of you that were at the Disney retreat and actually saw me in person and prayed for

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me back when I was still on the BRAT diet, if you wonder what that is, it's going to

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make you a BRAT because you're going to be hangry, but it's an acronym that stands for

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bananas, rice, applesauce and toast.

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That is what I was able to eat in Disney of all places.

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You know, I didn't get a Mickey head ice cream.

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I didn't get to eat a churro.

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I didn't get to eat any of the things that I would normally eat because it's Disney and

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what happens in Disney stays in Disney or is that Vegas?

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I'm not sure, but I think it's both places and for those of you that were at that retreat,

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we pressed in.

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God touched me.

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You guys prayed for me.

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I thank you so much for that, but I didn't get to enjoy any of the vittles and that's

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okay.

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You guys, we had an amazing chef.

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If you ever thought about doing a retreat with us, I see some of you from Columbia on

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here like Anna.

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If you ever thought of doing a retreat with me, we have a lot of fun.

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We eat a lot of good food.

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It's a good time.

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We have spiritual breakthrough and you should come.

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You should definitely come.

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Our Austin retreat is sold out.

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Can't come to that one, but we will be having a whole bunch of retreats next year in 26

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and I'm going to be announcing some really cool stuff at the party that we're going to

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be doing for those of you that are in couples, those of you that are already coupled up,

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for those that are married that are not on this call, although I do think we have some

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married people that double dip and come back here because they're still in subscription

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because they love it so much.

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We're going to have some good things going forward for our couples and for our married

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folks and for those of you that have specific things that are keeping you from being able

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to really step into your love story.

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So we're excited about all those announcements.

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A lot more in-person stuff coming in 26.

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I want to really encourage you, if you did not listen to my Supernatural Saturday from

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that was my first day back and I did it on the new year, the Hebrew new year 5786.

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Please go listen to it.

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It's got a lot of nuggets in it for everybody and you're definitely going to want to go

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listen to it because God would love to speak to your heart, encourage your heart and help

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you to strategize for what's coming in the next 12 months.

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I believe that there's going to be a lot of shifting.

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We're already seeing it.

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You guys, we see it in the earth right now.

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There's all kinds of shifting happening.

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awakening that's happening for a lot of people. It's going to be a good time to be a Christian

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because God is going to be opening a lot of doors. There's going to be a lot of doors opening

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in this season for those that have given their hearts to Jesus, for those that believe that

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they're called and on an assignment, including the partnerships that we've been praying for for so

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long. I want to encourage you that. I haven't done a dump of photos recently, but I will for those of

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you that are in phase three, which should be all of you on this session. This is only a phase three

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session. I will do a dump of all of those photos to keep encouraging your hearts. They are all

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shapes and all sizes and all colors and all ages. That is really important. It's important for us to

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remember that our spirit mate's going to be attracted to our essence, to what's more on

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the inside than what's on the outside. It doesn't give you a pass to let your outside just go to the

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pot, like an empty abandoned lot or field. We can't do that, but it is more about what's inside

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and less about what is outside when it comes to spirit mates. That is important. I'm back.

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I'm back. I could do the Terminator's voice and say I'm back, but my husband

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would not appreciate it because he said I do the worst impressions of anyone

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ever that lived. I think he's right. I'm not going to do it, but I might,

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but I'm not. Okay. All right. We have some loveseat action. If you're new to loveseats,

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if you just got here to phase three, welcome to our VIP community. That's what we call this

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portion of our program now. This is where we do all kinds of fun things like single spotlights.

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He said, she says, we have multiple coaches that coach in phase three besides just me,

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but this is my session for phase three, Ask Jackie, also known as loveseats. This is where

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you can ask me all your crazy questions and I will give you crazy answers and we will go forward

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together. All right. That is what we do here. It is recorded. If you need to watch the replay,

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if you are watching the replay in the future, hi future folk, time travelers and you will be able to

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always hear this in replay because it's always recorded. All right. So we have a few people

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that want to jump in the loveseats. We're going to go ahead and kick it off with Tanya D'Souza.

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Are you in the house? You're on my list. Loveseat participant Tanya, are you here?

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I don't see Tanya. All right. I think there was someone who wanted to ask

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a question named Christy. Christy, are you here?

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Yes, I'm here. I was unmuting. Let me just look at my. Okay. That's okay. Yes. So were you the

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one that had the question about fit on the profile? Yes. Okay. My memory is serving me well.

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All right. Cause I just looked over the notes just for a second. All right. So

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the way this works is you're here in the loveseat and I can't really spotlight you because I'm,

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you know, in the car. But, or can I? Yes, I can. I lied. I can spotlight you and I can also

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spotlight myself. All right. So Christy and I are together now and Christy, go ahead and ask your

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question. So my question is, as I'm looking at dating apps, I see on quite a few, well,

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not quite a few, but enough profiles that something like must be fit or some version of that.

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And when I look at the gentlemen, they're not that fit. And so I'm just wondering,

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what is the, is there a question that I can ask something that is respectful?

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Like what's your definition of fit? Cause I just swiped left anytime I see that. Cause I think,

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oh, well, you know, I'm a size 12. They're not going to want that, but I'm really active. And

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so I thought, all right, this is dumb instead of, you know, just swiping left. So I don't get

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rejected. Is there something, some nice way to ask them what their definition is or what they're

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looking for? I mean, you could just ask them that, you know, especially the ones that are

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not really that fit themselves. And, you know, you're still, you said you're a size 12. Are you

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also tall? No, I'm only five, six. Well, that's not short. So, you know, that's, that's over

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average height. And so I guess really what I want to make sure of is that, you know, you said,

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so when you really fit the first person that we have.

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ask ourselves is that, do I consider myself fit, right?

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It doesn't matter what, you know,

233
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beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

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So everyone's gonna have a different idea of what fit is,

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of what beauty is, but do I consider myself fit?

236
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Am I in the best shape that I can be in for my life?

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That's the very first question

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we should ask ourselves, right?

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Especially because we don't wanna be offended

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by other people saying that their preference

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is someone who is taking care of themselves,

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someone who's in good shape.

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It's very easy to get offended by someone saying that

244
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who's not in good shape to the naked eye, right?

245
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They could also be someone who is working out possibly

246
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and just, they also are someone who's just an endomorph

247
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and is gonna carry extra weight no matter what as well,

248
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right?

249
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And so we don't know, we don't know.

250
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But I do know this.

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And ladies, every time I say this,

252
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I always get an email from someone,

253
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don't come after me, this is not my fault, okay?

254
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It's not my fault.

255
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I'm here to tell you the truth though.

256
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And the truth is, is that I have been doing this

257
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for a long time and I have coached hundreds of men

258
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and I have interviewed even more,

259
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as far as like, you know, they come,

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they do questionnaire with me,

261
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they come, they have a discovery call.

262
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So I've had hundreds of men come through our coaching,

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through our program, and I've had even more than hundreds,

264
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probably at least a thousand or more men

265
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just come through my challenge or do a discovery call

266
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or something with the team.

267
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And I will tell you, 80% or more of them,

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the very first thing they say is,

269
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I don't want someone who's fat.

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They don't even say fit, they're not even being nice.

271
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They just straight up say, you know, no fat chicks, right?

272
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And that used to really offend me.

273
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And I'm married, okay?

274
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So I can imagine how it would feel to someone

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who's doing their best out here

276
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and still is never gonna be, you know, a size four.

277
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And that's cool.

278
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But the question that we have to have after that is,

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what's fat?

280
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You know, what is it?

281
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What's fit?

282
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What's fat?

283
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Without getting offended, we have to get curious.

284
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Leave a fence, leave a fence at the door, okay?

285
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Leave a fence off the table, leave anger off the table.

286
00:17:21.400 --> 00:17:22.980
If something like that makes you angry,

287
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let's do some deeper hard work

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and find out why were we bullied as kids?

289
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You know, did someone reject us

290
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because we weren't, you know, good enough for them

291
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or sexy enough for them?

292
00:17:32.600 --> 00:17:34.020
Gentlemen, you can get rejected as well.

293
00:17:34.180 --> 00:17:35.160
Maybe you weren't tall enough.

294
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Maybe you didn't have enough hair.

295
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Maybe you were hair challenged.

296
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You were follicly challenged, okay?

297
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Perhaps that's what it was.

298
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But whatever the case may be,

299
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when we have temptation to be offended,

300
00:17:49.140 --> 00:17:51.660
instead, let's be curious.

301
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Be curious.

302
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What is fit?

303
00:17:55.920 --> 00:17:56.560
What is fat?

304
00:17:57.720 --> 00:18:01.780
One person's fat is another person's curvy, right?

305
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One person's fit is another person's fat.

306
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You know, who knows?

307
00:18:09.920 --> 00:18:12.400
And so I think that, you know,

308
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approaching that with curiosity is a good place

309
00:18:15.240 --> 00:18:17.660
to be like, hey, I noticed that, you know,

310
00:18:17.660 --> 00:18:19.440
you're looking for someone who's fit.

311
00:18:20.040 --> 00:18:21.380
Like, what does fit mean to you?

312
00:18:22.180 --> 00:18:24.540
Someone who likes to work out, someone who's active,

313
00:18:24.800 --> 00:18:25.980
someone who likes to hike and bike,

314
00:18:26.440 --> 00:18:28.120
someone who, you know,

315
00:18:28.120 --> 00:18:30.540
is taking the best care of themselves that they can,

316
00:18:30.820 --> 00:18:33.060
like, you know, or is fit to you,

317
00:18:33.660 --> 00:18:38.900
you know, a tiny little petite size zero cheeky mama.

318
00:18:39.840 --> 00:18:42.380
But you don't have to ask the second question.

319
00:18:42.540 --> 00:18:43.540
Just ask the first.

320
00:18:43.760 --> 00:18:46.520
And we have size zero cheeky mamas in this program.

321
00:18:48.060 --> 00:18:48.700
Right?

322
00:18:50.420 --> 00:18:51.380
We do.

323
00:18:52.260 --> 00:18:53.780
We have the entire spectrum.

324
00:18:55.340 --> 00:18:57.100
And you can be skinny fat.

325
00:18:57.660 --> 00:18:59.520
You can be super unhealthy and skinny.

326
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I know that's true.

327
00:19:02.380 --> 00:19:04.600
So let's not get offended, friends.

328
00:19:04.680 --> 00:19:06.080
Let's get curious.

329
00:19:06.540 --> 00:19:09.580
I will tell you there's a large percentage of men

330
00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:13.620
who are not, you know, attracted to what they consider

331
00:19:13.620 --> 00:19:16.080
overweight women, but at the same time,

332
00:19:17.400 --> 00:19:20.020
what's overweight, and it goes for women too.

333
00:19:20.320 --> 00:19:21.960
Ladies, I'm not gonna let you off the hook.

334
00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:23.980
There's a lot of you that are not gonna give

335
00:19:24.020 --> 00:19:25.280
a chubby man a chance.

336
00:19:26.540 --> 00:19:27.320
You're not.

337
00:19:28.220 --> 00:19:30.000
He's got a little bit of a cortisol belly.

338
00:19:30.300 --> 00:19:30.960
It's no.

339
00:19:31.260 --> 00:19:32.320
It's a no for you.

340
00:19:32.400 --> 00:19:32.840
Right?

341
00:19:33.480 --> 00:19:34.100
I know.

342
00:19:34.300 --> 00:19:35.980
I know who you are.

343
00:19:37.180 --> 00:19:41.200
I have tried to float introductions towards people

344
00:19:41.200 --> 00:19:42.940
and they're like, nah, I'm not attracted to him.

345
00:19:42.960 --> 00:19:43.980
Well, you don't know him.

346
00:19:44.080 --> 00:19:45.280
So you shouldn't be attracted to him.

347
00:19:45.280 --> 00:19:45.800
Cause guess what?

348
00:19:45.860 --> 00:19:46.940
You've never met him before.

349
00:19:49.340 --> 00:19:51.880
So Christy, we want you to report back.

350
00:19:52.540 --> 00:19:55.800
Be bold, be curious, and tell us what happens.

351
00:19:56.800 --> 00:19:57.140
I will.

352
00:19:57.380 --> 00:19:57.700
Thank you.

353
00:19:58.040 --> 00:19:59.980
But like I said, when I started out the call today.

354
00:20:01.140 --> 00:20:06.280
Our spirit mates are going to love us you guys but we also have to love us.

355
00:20:06.780 --> 00:20:10.540
Our spirit mates are going to be attracted to our essence, they're going to be attracted

356
00:20:10.540 --> 00:20:18.640
to something that is intangible about us, our humor, our wits, our personality, our

357
00:20:18.640 --> 00:20:23.120
love of life, our love of Jesus, there's just so many different things but please don't

358
00:20:23.120 --> 00:20:27.520
make them have to get through layer and layer and layer of unhealthy behaviors to get to

359
00:20:27.520 --> 00:20:34.520
the essence of you, this goes for men and women, don't make them try to dig through

360
00:20:34.520 --> 00:20:37.080
all of that to find out who you are.

361
00:20:37.720 --> 00:20:43.640
So you loving you, step one and that's going to look like something, it's going to look

362
00:20:43.640 --> 00:20:51.540
like a change in behavior, possibly a change in diet for some of you, look someone said

363
00:20:51.540 --> 00:20:55.640
to me when I was going through all these health problems they said, hey you never really appreciate

364
00:20:55.640 --> 00:21:04.140
your health until you're sick, that's 100% true, just kind of take it for granted until

365
00:21:04.140 --> 00:21:06.280
there's something that's out of alignment, right?

366
00:21:06.280 --> 00:21:18.080
And so I will tell you that the best way to love yourself is to eat right and move your

367
00:21:18.080 --> 00:21:24.520
body and do your heart work and so if you're not doing those things, please, please do

368
00:21:24.520 --> 00:21:25.760
those things, okay?

369
00:21:26.520 --> 00:21:28.100
Love you so someone else can love you too.

370
00:21:28.380 --> 00:21:31.680
Alright, so let's see the next person, Christy, thank you for that question, I'm sure a lot

371
00:21:31.680 --> 00:21:35.700
of people have that question and want to know, hey what do I do?

372
00:21:35.820 --> 00:21:39.220
A lot of people just swipe left because they're mad though Christy, they just get super mad

373
00:21:39.220 --> 00:21:46.120
and just swipe left like, oh jerk, how dare you fatty, how come you want a skinny girl

374
00:21:46.780 --> 00:21:51.100
when you're over here looking like Santa without a beard, what's up?

375
00:21:51.780 --> 00:21:55.460
But you're not doing that, you're going to be curious and it's going to be great.

376
00:21:56.240 --> 00:22:04.560
Alright, let's see, Lily Serrano talking about boundaries, let's talk.

377
00:22:05.640 --> 00:22:15.600
I got to untag here, let me do it, sorry guys, I'm on the phone but when they asked me if

378
00:22:15.820 --> 00:22:22.420
I wanted to start back today, I was like, yeah, no, I don't care if I'm on this trip,

379
00:22:22.420 --> 00:22:23.280
I want to do it.

380
00:22:23.360 --> 00:22:32.220
Okay, so I got to find out where Christy is to untag her, let me look, alright, me, remove

381
00:22:32.220 --> 00:22:54.680
spotlight, there's Christy, alright, alright, are we both on spotlighted, yes, yes, alright,

382
00:22:54.680 --> 00:23:04.580
Lily is here, oh, Lily, you don't have your video on so I can't spotlight you but that's

383
00:23:04.580 --> 00:23:06.140
okay, go ahead and talk.

384
00:23:07.420 --> 00:23:16.060
So, I have a question about boundaries with opposite sex, I tend to not have, I tend to

385
00:23:16.060 --> 00:23:24.280
only have guy friends if I'm getting to know them romantically, so I'm trying to get a

386
00:23:25.300 --> 00:23:32.320
When I am in a relationship, I tend not to have guy friends, so I'm wondering at what

387
00:23:32.580 --> 00:23:39.220
point does it make sense to just draw the line with, is it unhealthy to just have guy

388
00:23:39.760 --> 00:23:45.440
friends that I want to get to know romantically only?

389
00:23:49.600 --> 00:23:54.760
I mean, I love friends becoming lovers so to speak and I don't mean having sex before

390
00:23:54.760 --> 00:23:59.720
marriage so please don't send me an email, I just mean, you know, going from platonic

391
00:24:00.160 --> 00:24:05.820
to romantic, I do like, I do love us to start out as friends, it's great, it doesn't always

392
00:24:06.060 --> 00:24:10.720
happen, in fact, it very seldom happens, you know, men seem to think that they know from

393
00:24:10.720 --> 00:24:14.380
the very beginning whether or not they're going to be interested in a woman romantically,

394
00:24:14.940 --> 00:24:22.220
so it's not necessarily a friends to, you know, friends to a romance or a girlfriend

395
00:24:22.420 --> 00:24:22.940
situation.

396
00:24:23.860 --> 00:24:27.800
So, women are different, we definitely can start out as friends, we can definitely let

397
00:24:27.800 --> 00:24:35.220
men grow on us, we can, you know, get to know them better and then give them a chance but

398
00:24:36.800 --> 00:24:43.500
I think that, you know, Lilly, it might be good for you, I mean, let me ask you a question,

399
00:24:43.660 --> 00:24:50.520
okay, full disclosure on your part, do you start out as friends with guys that you're

400
00:24:50.520 --> 00:24:53.420
interested in romantically because you just don't want to get rejected, do you kind of

401
00:24:53.420 --> 00:24:58.400
like put yourself in the friend zone, do you play the friend card instead of showing romantic

402
00:24:58.400 --> 00:24:59.840
interest from the beginning because you're saying.

403
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:04.000
I have a tendency to be friends with men that I'm romantically interested in.

404
00:25:05.400 --> 00:25:11.360
Well, what I mean is I am not really, we're, we start off more as acquaintances

405
00:25:11.360 --> 00:25:15.980
and then it's either going to move into, you know, something, something's

406
00:25:15.980 --> 00:25:17.160
going to develop from it or not.

407
00:25:17.200 --> 00:25:20.680
And if it doesn't, then we just disconnect and it is what it is.

408
00:25:21.140 --> 00:25:23.480
So that's more, I guess, specific.

409
00:25:26.680 --> 00:25:27.160
Okay.

410
00:25:27.160 --> 00:25:30.160
So what I just told you about men is that men don't usually do that.

411
00:25:30.420 --> 00:25:35.200
So how many of these acquaintances turn into romantic situations and how many

412
00:25:35.200 --> 00:25:36.780
of them just turn into friendships?

413
00:25:37.780 --> 00:25:41.460
Have you had a good record of them turning into a dating situation?

414
00:25:43.120 --> 00:25:46.160
Um, yeah, typically they, I mean, it's all level.

415
00:25:46.400 --> 00:25:50.360
So if we put it in levels, it's all level one, but that to

416
00:25:50.360 --> 00:25:51.840
me is an acquaintance level one.

417
00:25:54.120 --> 00:25:54.600
Sure.

418
00:25:55.340 --> 00:25:59.000
And you're saying most of these level ones go to level twos or threes?

419
00:26:01.120 --> 00:26:03.800
They'll stay at level one or they'll go to level two.

420
00:26:08.000 --> 00:26:11.720
But I'm at, my question is, are, do the majority of them go to level two?

421
00:26:15.260 --> 00:26:18.440
Um, I would say yes.

422
00:26:19.000 --> 00:26:20.400
And then it kind of dies off.

423
00:26:20.400 --> 00:26:20.560
Okay.

424
00:26:21.640 --> 00:26:22.100
Right.

425
00:26:22.100 --> 00:26:26.280
So that tells me that those guys were never really interested in

426
00:26:26.280 --> 00:26:27.660
being your friend in the first place.

427
00:26:27.980 --> 00:26:30.200
They were just kind of coming in through the friend door for whatever

428
00:26:30.200 --> 00:26:32.240
reason to get on a date with you.

429
00:26:33.400 --> 00:26:39.420
And, um, and so you could be attracting that, you know, so, um, I don't

430
00:26:39.420 --> 00:26:40.360
really understand your question.

431
00:26:40.440 --> 00:26:42.900
Are you saying, should you just be friends with guys that you're never

432
00:26:42.900 --> 00:26:44.500
going to be romantically interested in?

433
00:26:44.560 --> 00:26:45.320
Is that your question?

434
00:26:45.920 --> 00:26:50.940
Is it unhealthy to be friends with guys that I'm never gonna, that I know I'm

435
00:26:50.940 --> 00:26:54.920
never going to move into a romantic relationship with, how many female

436
00:26:54.920 --> 00:26:55.680
friends do you have?

437
00:26:56.460 --> 00:26:59.840
Oh, I mostly, all of my friends are females.

438
00:27:00.460 --> 00:27:00.980
Okay.

439
00:27:01.000 --> 00:27:05.240
Then yeah, I think it's fine to have men friends that you're never going

440
00:27:05.240 --> 00:27:06.800
to be romantically interested in.

441
00:27:06.800 --> 00:27:09.500
And you guys, the reason why I asked her about that was because

442
00:27:09.500 --> 00:27:10.840
there are women out there.

443
00:27:10.840 --> 00:27:16.220
She's obviously not one of them that they have a tendency because they're

444
00:27:16.480 --> 00:27:21.540
attractive to attract a lot of guys that are their friends, but really want more.

445
00:27:22.520 --> 00:27:24.600
You know, we know these girls, we know who they are.

446
00:27:24.640 --> 00:27:26.220
You know, they have a bunch of guy friends.

447
00:27:26.420 --> 00:27:27.720
They don't really have a lot of girlfriends, but they

448
00:27:27.720 --> 00:27:28.580
have a bunch of guy friends.

449
00:27:28.740 --> 00:27:32.800
All the guy friends are hoping to, you know, get their foot in the door by

450
00:27:32.800 --> 00:27:37.340
being a friend and, you know, get out of the friend zone and get into the end zone.

451
00:27:37.740 --> 00:27:38.180
Right.

452
00:27:38.180 --> 00:27:43.780
And, and then that, that woman is feel supported by these men because

453
00:27:43.780 --> 00:27:48.240
they're attentive because they, they're hoping to get into the end zone, right?

454
00:27:48.240 --> 00:27:49.900
They're hoping to get into the boyfriend zone.

455
00:27:50.060 --> 00:27:53.840
And so they're attentive, but if they eventually don't get

456
00:27:53.840 --> 00:27:55.820
there, then that kind of dies off.

457
00:27:55.860 --> 00:27:59.140
So I had to kind of gauge whether or not this was what Lily was talking about,

458
00:27:59.220 --> 00:28:04.920
but if she has a really good, uh, girlfriend base of women and those

459
00:28:04.920 --> 00:28:10.100
are her support system, and then she throws in a couple guys as well.

460
00:28:10.400 --> 00:28:11.780
Men and women can be friends.

461
00:28:12.840 --> 00:28:13.380
They can.

462
00:28:15.040 --> 00:28:20.900
Men and women can just be friends and nobody wants anything more, but you

463
00:28:20.900 --> 00:28:24.640
have to watch for signs that that's not really what's, you have to watch for

464
00:28:24.640 --> 00:28:26.020
signs that that's not really what's happening.

465
00:28:27.200 --> 00:28:27.720
Okay.

466
00:28:27.720 --> 00:28:34.900
How do I, all of you, if you're going to be friends, if you're going to be

467
00:28:34.900 --> 00:28:36.360
I'm talking about just friends.

468
00:28:36.560 --> 00:28:37.860
You're just going to be friends.

469
00:28:39.060 --> 00:28:39.060


470
00:28:40.280 --> 00:28:43.540
The very first thing that you have to do is get honest with yourself.

471
00:28:45.000 --> 00:28:47.220
Do I want anything more?

472
00:28:47.880 --> 00:28:51.020
Am I hoping for anything more from this person?

473
00:28:51.260 --> 00:28:53.640
Would I entertain something more from this person?

474
00:28:53.700 --> 00:28:55.300
You got to get honest about your own feelings.

475
00:28:55.640 --> 00:29:00.080
And then if the answer is no, no, even if they asked me out, I would say no.

476
00:29:00.400 --> 00:29:02.720
In fact, I hope they don't because I don't want to ruin the friendship

477
00:29:02.720 --> 00:29:05.460
because I'm not interested in them like that at all.

478
00:29:05.760 --> 00:29:07.200
So you get honest with yourself.

479
00:29:07.620 --> 00:29:11.420
And if it's a no, then you have to look at them and you have to

480
00:29:11.900 --> 00:29:14.280
take their behavior seriously.

481
00:29:15.420 --> 00:29:16.860
You have to look at it seriously.

482
00:29:16.960 --> 00:29:19.120
You can't just lie to yourself because you like their attention.

483
00:29:20.160 --> 00:29:20.600
Okay.

484
00:29:20.600 --> 00:29:22.680
Because we're main characters and we like attention.

485
00:29:22.920 --> 00:29:24.320
We can't lie to ourselves.

486
00:29:24.400 --> 00:29:28.360
We have to be honest with ourselves and we know whether someone's romantically

487
00:29:28.380 --> 00:29:32.020
interested in us, even if they're not saying so because they don't want to

488
00:29:32.020 --> 00:29:33.680
get shot yet, we know.

489
00:29:33.960 --> 00:29:39.820
And if that poor guy is showing signs that he's mooning over you, paying a lot

490
00:29:39.980 --> 00:29:43.360
of attention, being, you know, just someone who, you know, if you gave him

491
00:29:43.360 --> 00:29:47.720
the time of day, he would take it as far as romantically, you've got to let him

492
00:29:48.660 --> 00:29:50.360
know in conversation.

493
00:29:50.860 --> 00:29:52.900
Hey, I'm so glad we're friends.

494
00:29:52.980 --> 00:29:56.560
I want to let you know, I don't see this going anywhere else, but friendship.

495
00:29:57.520 --> 00:29:59.980
And then if he's not your friend anymore, he was never.

496
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:04.800
friend to begin with, he just wanted to see if he could get in through the friend door.

497
00:30:05.060 --> 00:30:09.800
And then if you're the one that is pining away hoping that it can become something else,

498
00:30:09.860 --> 00:30:16.240
then you have to be honest, you all have to be honest and say, Hey, I really enjoy our

499
00:30:16.940 --> 00:30:21.900
friendship but I have to be honest, I really have been hoping that it becomes more.

500
00:30:22.280 --> 00:30:25.740
Is that anything that you ever see happening?

501
00:30:25.740 --> 00:30:33.080
And if they say no, they're honest with you and they say no, then you have to either say,

502
00:30:33.160 --> 00:30:35.340
Okay, well, I don't think I could be friends with you because I'm always going to want

503
00:30:35.340 --> 00:30:36.760
something more and go your separate ways.

504
00:30:36.980 --> 00:30:41.520
Or you're going to if you feel like you really can be and don't be don't be lying to yourself.

505
00:30:41.980 --> 00:30:46.620
Don't be trying to decipher and decode everything they do, hoping they're going to change their

506
00:30:46.620 --> 00:30:48.140
mind, hoping you're going to grow on them.

507
00:30:48.300 --> 00:30:51.420
You know, they're, they're, they're paying more attention to you this week than they

508
00:30:51.420 --> 00:30:52.040
did last week.

509
00:30:52.040 --> 00:30:54.260
So maybe they're, they're starting to be attracted to you.

510
00:30:54.260 --> 00:30:55.320
No, no, no.

511
00:30:55.320 --> 00:31:00.760
They said, No, please do yourself a favor, you're just going to get into a situationship

512
00:31:00.760 --> 00:31:04.280
where you keep looking for signs and evidence that it's something more than what they already

513
00:31:04.280 --> 00:31:05.120
told you it was.

514
00:31:05.560 --> 00:31:06.660
And you're going to break your own heart.

515
00:31:07.380 --> 00:31:14.020
I promise you nine times out of 10, nine and a half times out of 10, you're going to break

516
00:31:14.020 --> 00:31:14.620
your own heart.

517
00:31:18.160 --> 00:31:20.880
No question about that.

518
00:31:22.680 --> 00:31:26.140
I want you guys to raise your hands if you've ever done what I just said.

519
00:31:27.020 --> 00:31:32.020
Got yourself into a situation where you're just hoping for more, hoping for more.

520
00:31:33.040 --> 00:31:35.860
They kind of made it clear that there wasn't going to be more.

521
00:31:36.120 --> 00:31:38.660
But there were just times where you felt like there was chemistry.

522
00:31:38.940 --> 00:31:41.420
There's times where you felt like it wasn't just friends.

523
00:31:42.740 --> 00:31:46.380
Look at all those hands, lots of hands.

524
00:31:48.480 --> 00:31:51.220
All right, you guys, let's not break our own hearts.

525
00:31:51.300 --> 00:31:52.500
Let's be honest with ourselves.

526
00:31:54.240 --> 00:31:56.020
Let's define this thing early on.

527
00:31:56.080 --> 00:31:59.240
If there's extra feelings, if you know they have them, call them out.

528
00:31:59.580 --> 00:32:01.300
If you have them, call yourself out.

529
00:32:01.860 --> 00:32:07.720
And if you really can't be friends with them without locking yourself down and basically

530
00:32:08.300 --> 00:32:12.280
delaying a real relationship with someone else, then don't do it.

531
00:32:12.760 --> 00:32:13.860
Lily, what's your question?

532
00:32:15.120 --> 00:32:21.900
I've had a situation like that where I was friends with a guy and I told him from the

533
00:32:21.900 --> 00:32:27.480
very beginning that when I get married, you'll probably be my bridesmaid.

534
00:32:27.740 --> 00:32:32.300
I was just kidding, but not attracted to him at all.

535
00:32:33.160 --> 00:32:35.700
I'm sure he loved that comment.

536
00:32:35.840 --> 00:32:36.100
Go ahead.

537
00:32:37.060 --> 00:32:39.100
He ended up having feelings for me.

538
00:32:39.100 --> 00:32:46.300
It's like you can be up front and they can still tell you what they want, and then how

539
00:32:46.320 --> 00:32:47.860
do I navigate that?

540
00:32:48.960 --> 00:32:51.960
Well, first of all, he didn't end up with feelings for you.

541
00:32:52.060 --> 00:32:53.300
He always had them.

542
00:32:54.180 --> 00:32:55.460
He always had them.

543
00:32:55.620 --> 00:33:02.600
He was just hoping that you were going to need him and change your mind or see him in

544
00:33:02.600 --> 00:33:03.120
a different light.

545
00:33:03.120 --> 00:33:04.840
And ladies, we have to be very careful.

546
00:33:05.500 --> 00:33:11.900
If you have a guy in your life that you know likes you, all right, and the way that we...

547
00:33:11.900 --> 00:33:15.540
First of all, we know, and that's why we say things like what Lily said, Oh, hey, you're

548
00:33:15.580 --> 00:33:16.380
going to...

549
00:33:16.380 --> 00:33:17.400
Oh, you're such a good friend.

550
00:33:17.400 --> 00:33:18.440
You're such a good pal.

551
00:33:18.480 --> 00:33:20.180
You're going to be my bridesmaid someday.

552
00:33:20.260 --> 00:33:21.580
It's very emasculating.

553
00:33:21.580 --> 00:33:25.240
First of all, we do it though, because we want to make sure that we're just letting

554
00:33:25.240 --> 00:33:27.940
them know, Hey, I see you as a friend, bro.

555
00:33:28.240 --> 00:33:28.640
Okay.

556
00:33:28.640 --> 00:33:29.540
We're just friends.

557
00:33:30.040 --> 00:33:32.040
But at the same time, we like attention.

558
00:33:32.920 --> 00:33:33.720
We like support.

559
00:33:34.360 --> 00:33:41.420
And oftentimes these men who have these secret, you know, crushes on us and we know about

560
00:33:41.420 --> 00:33:43.040
them, it's not a secret.

561
00:33:43.940 --> 00:33:45.560
We like the attention they give us.

562
00:33:45.740 --> 00:33:47.460
We like the support they give us.

563
00:33:47.560 --> 00:33:51.820
When someone else breaks our heart or someone we do like doesn't like us back, we come running

564
00:33:51.820 --> 00:33:53.620
to them and they tell us how great we are.

565
00:33:53.760 --> 00:33:56.060
You guys do not use them.

566
00:33:56.740 --> 00:33:57.660
Do not do that.

567
00:33:58.500 --> 00:34:00.040
Do not give them reason to hope.

568
00:34:00.420 --> 00:34:01.200
That's wrong.

569
00:34:01.200 --> 00:34:02.860
I'm not saying Lily does it.

570
00:34:02.860 --> 00:34:04.560
I'm just saying we do do it.

571
00:34:04.560 --> 00:34:06.000
I used to do it.

572
00:34:06.000 --> 00:34:06.820
His name is Jimmy.

573
00:34:07.080 --> 00:34:08.120
I did it.

574
00:34:08.219 --> 00:34:09.500
I got to be honest.

575
00:34:09.520 --> 00:34:10.100
I did.

576
00:34:10.320 --> 00:34:14.560
I wasn't ever going to, I was, I was, it's even worse too.

577
00:34:14.659 --> 00:34:20.040
It's even worse when you actually did have, we had a very short romantic relationship.

578
00:34:20.300 --> 00:34:21.139
Very short.

579
00:34:21.580 --> 00:34:24.980
Met him through a friend, very short little romantic relationship.

580
00:34:25.420 --> 00:34:27.400
Didn't like him like that.

581
00:34:27.400 --> 00:34:28.820
Didn't want it anymore.

582
00:34:28.820 --> 00:34:34.820
Broke up with him, moved on, had the same friend group, ended up friends like in the

583
00:34:34.820 --> 00:34:37.600
same friend group, started getting to be closer.

584
00:34:38.179 --> 00:34:41.400
I could tell that he always wanted it to go back to a romantic place.

585
00:34:41.560 --> 00:34:43.980
It never was gonna, but I like the attention.

586
00:34:44.620 --> 00:34:45.659
I'm just being honest.

587
00:34:46.800 --> 00:34:47.860
I like the attention.

588
00:34:48.020 --> 00:34:49.560
He was always the good time guy.

589
00:34:49.639 --> 00:34:51.440
He was always the guy that was going to be there for me.

590
00:34:51.560 --> 00:34:55.840
He's always the guy that like kind of worship the ground I walked on and I knew all that

591
00:34:56.320 --> 00:34:58.860
and I just kept him around as my own personal little hype man.

592
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:02.720
Hmm, it's wrong. Don't do it

593
00:35:03.820 --> 00:35:08.460
June now, he's happily married now and has children and he's moved on with his life

594
00:35:09.680 --> 00:35:11.640
but still I

595
00:35:11.640 --> 00:35:14.420
Broke his I broke his heart. I

596
00:35:14.420 --> 00:35:16.580
Was giving him hope was getting him false. Hope

597
00:35:17.080 --> 00:35:23.120
Gentlemen, you guys do this too to ladies because you like the attention don't do it

598
00:35:24.660 --> 00:35:25.820
both people

599
00:35:26.180 --> 00:35:29.840
Should feel like if you were the last person on earth

600
00:35:30.000 --> 00:35:36.440
I would never be romantically involved with you because it would be like kissing my brother or sister

601
00:35:36.740 --> 00:35:40.160
Like there are I have male friends like that

602
00:35:40.760 --> 00:35:42.360
I mean, I'm a married woman now

603
00:35:42.360 --> 00:35:48.240
But I have male friends like that that it doesn't matter if we were the only two people left on the earth

604
00:35:48.240 --> 00:35:52.300
So the the population would not get repopulated by us

605
00:35:56.360 --> 00:35:59.540
It wouldn't I'd have to be in a coma

606
00:36:00.700 --> 00:36:02.260
all right, so

607
00:36:02.720 --> 00:36:06.520
And that's not because you hate them or you think they're ugly. There's just no

608
00:36:09.140 --> 00:36:11.060
Romantic feeling right? Okay

609
00:36:11.640 --> 00:36:18.540
All right. So Lily you're beautiful. I use your power correctly use your power correctly, honey. I

610
00:36:18.540 --> 00:36:25.520
Do have one friend like that and it's just great but one guy friend, but yeah, I've been very I don't what goes wrong

611
00:36:25.520 --> 00:36:29.840
Comes around. I don't want to be ever used. I'd never want to do that to guys. I'm very careful

612
00:36:31.500 --> 00:36:37.700
Yeah, be very careful and let's not just use our words to tell them we're not interested use our body language

613
00:36:37.700 --> 00:36:41.920
You know, don't be hanging all over people. Don't be flirty with people

614
00:36:42.220 --> 00:36:43.260
You know

615
00:36:44.600 --> 00:36:48.280
Unless they're your GBF your gay best friend and even then

616
00:36:49.720 --> 00:36:55.540
Even then and I know we're all Christians in here. We're like Jackie. We're not allowed to have gay best friends. Well, I mean

617
00:36:56.340 --> 00:37:00.340
Everybody knows everybody knows a gay guy. That's super fun

618
00:37:01.420 --> 00:37:02.580
It's just true

619
00:37:03.500 --> 00:37:09.680
If you work anywhere a restaurant if you work retail no matter where you work, you just it always happens

620
00:37:09.680 --> 00:37:11.460
It always happens to me. I don't know

621
00:37:11.920 --> 00:37:17.480
But we got to be careful with our flirting power men and women be careful with your flirting power

622
00:37:17.760 --> 00:37:22.760
Okay. All right. So those are the only people that wanted to jump in the love seat. Did Tanya ever make it Tanya?

623
00:37:23.060 --> 00:37:23.440
Are you here?

624
00:37:24.500 --> 00:37:25.060
Tanya

625
00:37:27.640 --> 00:37:29.180
Are you here girl

626
00:37:29.780 --> 00:37:36.880
All right. All right. I have people's hands up. Do you have questions or did you have your hands up for other things Vicky?

627
00:37:37.020 --> 00:37:38.180
What do you got?

628
00:37:39.860 --> 00:37:43.220
Okay, hello, well I have some good news

629
00:37:44.760 --> 00:37:46.580
Cuz this OG

630
00:37:47.560 --> 00:37:50.900
Wants to get information about Simba's please

631
00:37:52.780 --> 00:37:55.160
Yeah, come on girl, yes

632
00:37:57.540 --> 00:37:59.200
My profile was hidden

633
00:37:59.720 --> 00:38:05.460
And I'm sorry, I'm not camera ready. So I can't do that. But um, my profile has been hidden

634
00:38:06.580 --> 00:38:10.500
Because I was focused on improving my health as you guys know

635
00:38:10.560 --> 00:38:14.140
I just wanted to get my health back because I didn't feel like I'd be a fun date

636
00:38:14.560 --> 00:38:18.280
And so that's where my focus was and then you guys know I lost my senior

637
00:38:18.280 --> 00:38:24.640
Dogs and so I was only praying for another dog, you know canine to love that's it

638
00:38:24.640 --> 00:38:32.080
And then I unhid my profile. I unhid my profile for like 15 minutes and

639
00:38:33.660 --> 00:38:37.080
I was just a browse a minute and I met this

640
00:38:37.740 --> 00:38:38.780
godly man

641
00:38:38.780 --> 00:38:42.800
With lots of property to have many dogs

642
00:38:45.800 --> 00:38:46.680
Wow

643
00:38:46.680 --> 00:38:51.240
Look at what happens when you kind of take a little bit of a sabbatical to work on yourself

644
00:38:52.220 --> 00:38:57.560
Yo, I love that Vicky. That's so awesome. So you guys are already thinking about Simba's, huh?

645
00:38:57.780 --> 00:39:02.600
You were thinking about Simba's and I will I will be if everything goes good

646
00:39:02.920 --> 00:39:05.040
I'll be a bonus mom

647
00:39:05.140 --> 00:39:08.760
I've already met three of the six kids and

648
00:39:10.620 --> 00:39:11.180
Yeah

649
00:39:12.140 --> 00:39:15.120
So this is your suddenly

650
00:39:15.880 --> 00:39:22.540
You are talking you're so giddy listen to her listen to her giddy laugh. Oh you guys that's so exciting

651
00:39:23.220 --> 00:39:28.600
I am so excited for you. I have lots of details to share. I still haven't posted yet, but

652
00:39:29.700 --> 00:39:32.840
Unbelievable, I mean supernatural like holy wow

653
00:39:33.640 --> 00:39:39.800
Listen, I want you to post I want you to post all the details because remember and this goes for everyone including all you newbies

654
00:39:39.800 --> 00:39:42.960
That are here in VIP community. You made it finally to phase three

655
00:39:42.960 --> 00:39:47.100
We believe in being God defended and so we want to weigh in on your relationships

656
00:39:47.100 --> 00:39:51.220
We want other other people to get their eyes on the details of your relationships

657
00:39:51.440 --> 00:39:58.420
This is how God continues to protect us and help us and give us wisdom in how to move forward. And so

658
00:39:58.700 --> 00:39:59.980
So Vicky, you know the drill

659
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:01.640
So, get posting, girl.

660
00:40:02.500 --> 00:40:05.420
And then, will you, will somebody send me information about Symbus?

661
00:40:06.400 --> 00:40:10.580
You can, you can write into admin at JackieDorman.com and get the information.

662
00:40:11.320 --> 00:40:14.520
Symbus is in its, I think it has two more weeks of this class,

663
00:40:14.520 --> 00:40:17.860
and then they'll, another one will start like a week later.

664
00:40:18.040 --> 00:40:22.620
So, the next Symbus should probably be towards the end of October.

665
00:40:23.520 --> 00:40:24.480
Okay, super.

666
00:40:24.640 --> 00:40:25.400
Thank you.

667
00:40:27.360 --> 00:40:28.880
Yay, good to hear from you.

668
00:40:28.880 --> 00:40:30.140
Love it, so exciting.

669
00:40:30.720 --> 00:40:33.420
Okay, let's see, Allison, you're up.

670
00:40:38.920 --> 00:40:41.900
Sorry, my, my hand was up for nothing.

671
00:40:42.980 --> 00:40:44.300
Okay, that's okay.

672
00:40:44.300 --> 00:40:44.820
No worries.

673
00:40:45.800 --> 00:40:46.560
WisDene.

674
00:40:50.820 --> 00:40:52.460
Was Hunter first?

675
00:40:53.980 --> 00:40:55.460
I don't see.

676
00:40:55.460 --> 00:40:59.200
You guys, I'm on my phone, so.

677
00:40:59.760 --> 00:41:02.820
I'm here, but I thought that other people had their hands up first.

678
00:41:03.380 --> 00:41:03.380


679
00:41:03.460 --> 00:41:05.460
If, if Hunter, you have a question, what is it?

680
00:41:06.160 --> 00:41:06.400
Go ahead.

681
00:41:06.940 --> 00:41:11.900
Oh, it's about, about my, it's about how I can explain my situation and how I

682
00:41:11.900 --> 00:41:14.080
conclude on how I see it, interpret it.

683
00:41:14.080 --> 00:41:16.660
And I want to know how, if I'm doing the right thing or not.

684
00:41:16.680 --> 00:41:17.520
Okay, go ahead.

685
00:41:18.620 --> 00:41:24.420
Well, basically all this time I've been idolizing women and worshiping them.

686
00:41:24.420 --> 00:41:28.760
And basically my idea is to get in a relationship because there was something

687
00:41:28.760 --> 00:41:33.340
in it for me because of something, but I figured, you know what, that's the yellow

688
00:41:33.340 --> 00:41:38.220
flag, we got to look beyond that, like an extra layer relationship is how

689
00:41:38.220 --> 00:41:39.960
I, I really care about this person.

690
00:41:40.220 --> 00:41:44.900
So I look at, I found, I was on message with, with Brittany, someone

691
00:41:44.900 --> 00:41:49.080
from our singles nation, and then I even taught, I said, how have you been?

692
00:41:49.340 --> 00:41:51.680
Think about how I would, I was treated.

693
00:41:51.680 --> 00:41:54.740
You don't like your past relationships, how they treat it.

694
00:41:54.740 --> 00:41:55.920
So don't treat her like that.

695
00:41:56.220 --> 00:41:57.680
So I said, how have you been?

696
00:41:57.780 --> 00:41:58.880
And she goes, I'm good.

697
00:41:58.920 --> 00:41:59.340
How about you?

698
00:41:59.400 --> 00:42:00.780
I told her about my situation.

699
00:42:01.080 --> 00:42:02.840
And then she told me, how have you been?

700
00:42:02.940 --> 00:42:03.860
Oh, what have you been up to?

701
00:42:04.380 --> 00:42:07.600
And I told her, and then she said, oh, I've been doing this like school.

702
00:42:07.660 --> 00:42:09.360
And I was like, so tell me about it.

703
00:42:09.360 --> 00:42:14.080
I was basically doing that to basically focus on her because that's how I'm more

704
00:42:14.080 --> 00:42:15.820
involved because that's how I want to be treated.

705
00:42:16.460 --> 00:42:20.880
Basically there's an extra layer, unlike yellow flag incentives, where you want to

706
00:42:20.880 --> 00:42:22.900
be, you want to do something because there's something in it for you.

707
00:42:22.900 --> 00:42:25.580
You want to do something because you care, like an extra layer.

708
00:42:25.980 --> 00:42:28.780
So I wanted, so I want personal growth.

709
00:42:28.780 --> 00:42:30.800
Isn't so much trying to make a relationship happen.

710
00:42:30.840 --> 00:42:33.660
It's about you trying to care for someone else.

711
00:42:33.660 --> 00:42:34.960
It's basically the new growth.

712
00:42:35.020 --> 00:42:36.500
I want to try out something new thing.

713
00:42:36.520 --> 00:42:40.100
I want to try out, basically have new abilities.

714
00:42:40.380 --> 00:42:40.820
Hunter.

715
00:42:41.040 --> 00:42:41.780
It sounds great.

716
00:42:42.220 --> 00:42:42.480
Yeah.

717
00:42:43.420 --> 00:42:44.840
Reminds me of my son.

718
00:42:45.020 --> 00:42:46.800
So I attempted something else.

719
00:42:47.620 --> 00:42:48.580
Just got engaged.

720
00:42:49.560 --> 00:42:54.420
And there was another, so first of all, you're, you're attempting to ask people

721
00:42:54.420 --> 00:42:58.580
how they're doing and check in with them, not try to go straight for the date, but

722
00:42:58.580 --> 00:43:01.380
actually care about people just in general.

723
00:43:01.380 --> 00:43:01.900
That's good.

724
00:43:01.960 --> 00:43:02.480
What else you got?

725
00:43:02.620 --> 00:43:07.500
And then I also was taught she's in Ohio and I'm in, but I live in New York, but I

726
00:43:07.500 --> 00:43:09.320
have family where I was born and raised.

727
00:43:09.440 --> 00:43:13.680
I even went to the dating thing and she and Christie had a dating thing.

728
00:43:13.680 --> 00:43:15.220
The one who's hosting a Cleveland thing.

729
00:43:15.220 --> 00:43:19.780
And then I, I got to show around and I told her, I'll see, she agrees.

730
00:43:19.960 --> 00:43:20.460
I'm confident.

731
00:43:20.740 --> 00:43:24.820
So I may want to be in a relationship badly, but I also, but I'm more into

732
00:43:24.820 --> 00:43:27.420
sticking around last year, single for personal growth.

733
00:43:27.880 --> 00:43:30.180
So I attempted, it was my birthday.

734
00:43:30.420 --> 00:43:31.460
I asked her, how was your birthday?

735
00:43:31.720 --> 00:43:32.720
She goes, I did great.

736
00:43:32.900 --> 00:43:33.380
How about you?

737
00:43:33.600 --> 00:43:34.880
And I shared about hard work.

738
00:43:34.940 --> 00:43:37.060
We share about what we did try to find a common ground.

739
00:43:37.500 --> 00:43:38.980
And then I also shared.

740
00:43:39.280 --> 00:43:45.200
And then when my Commons labor day, I asked, try to ask her on it, figure, you

741
00:43:45.200 --> 00:43:46.560
know, I want to ask you on a date.

742
00:43:46.580 --> 00:43:48.300
And she said, no, I'm going to be busy.

743
00:43:48.320 --> 00:43:50.320
And I was like, okay, I accepted it.

744
00:43:50.320 --> 00:43:53.880
It's a way of getting out of my comfort zone and say, come on, Hunter, don't give

745
00:43:54.120 --> 00:43:58.040
up because even though there's boundaries and there are things I got and it feels

746
00:43:58.320 --> 00:44:03.000
uncomfortable, I don't like to people have negative effects on dating where, but I'm

747
00:44:03.000 --> 00:44:04.440
not the kind of guy who gives up.

748
00:44:04.440 --> 00:44:07.480
It's just something to figure out rather than just build a wall and

749
00:44:07.600 --> 00:44:09.200
remain antisocial to dating.

750
00:44:12.040 --> 00:44:12.520
Absolutely.

751
00:44:13.040 --> 00:44:13.860
Great job, Hunter.

752
00:44:13.860 --> 00:44:15.640
You're making lots of great progress.

753
00:44:16.080 --> 00:44:17.780
I'm, I'm, I'm excited for you.

754
00:44:17.820 --> 00:44:18.400
That's awesome.

755
00:44:18.440 --> 00:44:19.800
So yes, you're on the right track.

756
00:44:20.060 --> 00:44:20.660
Keep going forward.

757
00:44:21.000 --> 00:44:21.440
Okay.

758
00:44:21.520 --> 00:44:24.220
I'm just not the guy I was when I came in that they're single.

759
00:44:24.320 --> 00:44:25.060
No, you're not.

760
00:44:25.080 --> 00:44:26.460
You're definitely not the guy you were.

761
00:44:26.620 --> 00:44:29.440
You've grown so much and I'm so proud of you and it's awesome.

762
00:44:29.440 --> 00:44:30.980
So keep going forward.

763
00:44:31.060 --> 00:44:33.380
I promise you one of these days you're going to get a yes.

764
00:44:33.420 --> 00:44:37.840
And one of these days you're going to go forward with that person who said yes.

765
00:44:37.840 --> 00:44:38.940
And it's going to be awesome.

766
00:44:39.060 --> 00:44:40.280
It's, it's going to happen.

767
00:44:40.280 --> 00:44:41.600
It really is.

768
00:44:41.940 --> 00:44:43.780
Instead of saying, Oh, she might be finding someone.

769
00:44:44.260 --> 00:44:45.740
Well, you don't know until you try.

770
00:44:45.940 --> 00:44:46.940
Come on, Hunter, give it a shot.

771
00:44:47.100 --> 00:44:47.560
Give it a shot.

772
00:44:47.600 --> 00:44:50.780
Cause I do jujitsu and I'm afraid of being in a match that I'd lose.

773
00:44:50.960 --> 00:44:52.520
So I figured, you know what, come on, go on in.

774
00:44:52.680 --> 00:44:54.080
And then look, I actually did a takedown.

775
00:44:55.800 --> 00:44:56.120
Yes.

776
00:44:56.120 --> 00:44:58.520
And if you want to meet a Hunter in person, you can go on our

777
00:44:58.520 --> 00:44:59.980
last year single cruise in January.

778
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:02.700
The registration is still open for that.

779
00:45:03.640 --> 00:45:05.620
And I know that Hunter will be attending that

780
00:45:05.620 --> 00:45:06.960
and I'm sure he's super excited.

781
00:45:07.860 --> 00:45:09.380
So good job, Hunter.

782
00:45:09.680 --> 00:45:10.800
Keep encouraging yourself.

783
00:45:11.260 --> 00:45:12.640
Get going, get going forward.

784
00:45:12.860 --> 00:45:14.200
You've made a lot of great progress

785
00:45:14.200 --> 00:45:15.380
and we're proud of you here.

786
00:45:15.720 --> 00:45:17.400
All right, Liz Dean, you're up.

787
00:45:19.280 --> 00:45:24.180
Okay, my question is about how do I know

788
00:45:24.180 --> 00:45:29.520
how long to continue talking to this level two guy?

789
00:45:30.920 --> 00:45:32.480
We met on an app.

790
00:45:33.340 --> 00:45:36.180
I live in Texas, he lives in California.

791
00:45:36.540 --> 00:45:39.080
He did visit, we've been talking eight weeks.

792
00:45:40.100 --> 00:45:42.820
He did visit at the beginning of September

793
00:45:43.960 --> 00:45:49.120
and he has offered to come again in a couple of weeks.

794
00:45:49.420 --> 00:45:51.280
We're gonna actually meet up in Austin.

795
00:45:52.900 --> 00:45:58.120
But it seems like both of us are not super expressive

796
00:45:58.120 --> 00:45:59.700
like just by personality,

797
00:45:59.920 --> 00:46:03.560
like neither of us are super flirty by nature.

798
00:46:03.840 --> 00:46:05.440
Like at the beginning there was some,

799
00:46:05.540 --> 00:46:07.140
but then it seems like we've just continued

800
00:46:07.140 --> 00:46:10.160
to have conversation and it's good conversation.

801
00:46:10.320 --> 00:46:11.600
We enjoy talking to each other,

802
00:46:11.620 --> 00:46:16.140
but it feels like it's not like momentum building.

803
00:46:16.460 --> 00:46:19.220
And so I don't know how long,

804
00:46:19.880 --> 00:46:21.820
like how long do I keep talking to him?

805
00:46:21.820 --> 00:46:23.480
I mean, he's gonna visit in a couple of weeks,

806
00:46:23.580 --> 00:46:25.160
but I don't know what I should be assessing

807
00:46:25.160 --> 00:46:27.400
or what I should be asking.

808
00:46:28.520 --> 00:46:31.700
Okay, so you guys, a lot of people don't do well

809
00:46:31.700 --> 00:46:34.740
over like digital communication, all right?

810
00:46:34.740 --> 00:46:35.960
A lot of people, they just,

811
00:46:36.260 --> 00:46:37.760
they don't feel like they can open up.

812
00:46:37.900 --> 00:46:39.660
It feels flat, it's really hard.

813
00:46:40.140 --> 00:46:44.000
So really what's important is that you would be gauging

814
00:46:44.480 --> 00:46:47.640
your feelings about him and about the chemistry

815
00:46:47.640 --> 00:46:50.640
between the two of you with your in-person meetings.

816
00:46:52.080 --> 00:46:54.580
So when he came in person, how did that go?

817
00:46:56.020 --> 00:46:58.120
I mean, we had fun together.

818
00:46:58.380 --> 00:47:00.180
It felt very easy to communicate,

819
00:47:00.280 --> 00:47:01.140
like good, easy conversation.

820
00:47:03.920 --> 00:47:07.460
So we spent like chunks of days together,

821
00:47:07.460 --> 00:47:09.760
not all day, because we wanted breaks.

822
00:47:10.300 --> 00:47:13.940
So chunks of Saturday and then like church Sunday,

823
00:47:14.680 --> 00:47:18.500
break, evening dinner, like a walk around the mall

824
00:47:18.500 --> 00:47:19.300
and then evening dinner.

825
00:47:19.300 --> 00:47:21.480
And it was fun, so by the time I dropped him off,

826
00:47:21.620 --> 00:47:23.340
I was like, I'm having fun.

827
00:47:23.340 --> 00:47:26.060
We both kind of mutually said it was fun in person,

828
00:47:26.860 --> 00:47:31.080
but I said I wasn't sure, like I was just honest

829
00:47:31.080 --> 00:47:33.900
and said I wasn't sure where my romantic feelings were yet,

830
00:47:34.260 --> 00:47:35.840
but that I enjoyed time together.

831
00:47:35.840 --> 00:47:39.840
And so he interpreted that to mean that I wasn't interested

832
00:47:39.840 --> 00:47:41.120
and just wanted friendship.

833
00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:45.580
But when we did a follow-up video call,

834
00:47:45.600 --> 00:47:47.420
we've just been doing video calls every week.

835
00:47:47.460 --> 00:47:50.400
And so the following video call,

836
00:47:50.400 --> 00:47:53.300
we had to kind of talk about all of our missed cues

837
00:47:53.480 --> 00:47:56.440
that we each misinterpreted from each other.

838
00:47:56.600 --> 00:47:58.080
And it was a good conversation.

839
00:47:58.080 --> 00:48:01.120
Yeah, it was a good conversation and understood,

840
00:48:01.560 --> 00:48:03.260
okay, neither of us are like quick

841
00:48:03.800 --> 00:48:05.500
to feel romantically attractive.

842
00:48:05.640 --> 00:48:07.700
Like for both of us, we said, oh, it seems like

843
00:48:07.740 --> 00:48:10.120
we're both the same, that we're like kind of slow

844
00:48:10.280 --> 00:48:11.260
to feel attracted.

845
00:48:13.040 --> 00:48:14.400
So I guess-

846
00:48:14.400 --> 00:48:16.740
That's really awesome that you guys were able to,

847
00:48:17.160 --> 00:48:19.460
instead of just allowing there to be miscommunication,

848
00:48:19.460 --> 00:48:21.340
allowing there to be assumption,

849
00:48:21.500 --> 00:48:22.980
you guys, it's really important, please listen.

850
00:48:23.720 --> 00:48:27.420
So much of what we do in relationship, early relationship,

851
00:48:28.120 --> 00:48:30.140
that even not just men and women,

852
00:48:30.320 --> 00:48:31.680
but women and women, men and men,

853
00:48:31.780 --> 00:48:34.060
just relationship in general, when we meet people,

854
00:48:34.180 --> 00:48:36.560
we make so many more assumptions than we think we've made.

855
00:48:37.940 --> 00:48:40.440
The next time you meet someone, I want you to,

856
00:48:40.700 --> 00:48:41.480
whether it's a date,

857
00:48:41.660 --> 00:48:43.600
whether it's someone you're talking to on an app,

858
00:48:43.620 --> 00:48:46.140
or whether it's just someone that you meet at work or church,

859
00:48:46.560 --> 00:48:48.240
it doesn't have to be the opposite sex.

860
00:48:48.240 --> 00:48:50.320
Just you're meeting someone new for the first time.

861
00:48:50.400 --> 00:48:53.220
I want you, when you walk away from that meeting,

862
00:48:53.280 --> 00:48:54.560
I want you to be honest,

863
00:48:54.640 --> 00:48:56.340
and I want you to write down in your phone,

864
00:48:56.440 --> 00:48:58.480
like talk text into your phone, whatever,

865
00:48:59.800 --> 00:49:02.740
how many assumptions you made about that person.

866
00:49:05.320 --> 00:49:06.920
Man, we assume so much.

867
00:49:07.240 --> 00:49:09.140
And so what she is saying is that

868
00:49:09.140 --> 00:49:11.320
they actually talked about their assumptions.

869
00:49:11.720 --> 00:49:14.220
They talked about any possible miscommunications.

870
00:49:14.780 --> 00:49:16.720
They were able to, you know,

871
00:49:16.720 --> 00:49:21.260
really be honest about the fact that both of them

872
00:49:21.260 --> 00:49:23.780
are more of a confection oven and not a microwave

873
00:49:23.780 --> 00:49:25.000
when it comes to feelings.

874
00:49:25.520 --> 00:49:27.980
Not everyone's gonna, not everyone's gonna get there.

875
00:49:28.200 --> 00:49:29.680
Not everyone's an Instapot, all right?

876
00:49:29.740 --> 00:49:32.720
Some people are a crockpot, and that's okay.

877
00:49:32.760 --> 00:49:34.280
And if you're both crockpots,

878
00:49:34.940 --> 00:49:36.800
that, you know how, why that makes that hard?

879
00:49:36.840 --> 00:49:38.460
Because usually one person,

880
00:49:38.780 --> 00:49:41.200
if one person's a microwave and the other one's a crockpot,

881
00:49:41.280 --> 00:49:43.740
the microwave keeps the energy and the chemistry going

882
00:49:43.740 --> 00:49:46.120
until the crockpot warms up to it and gets there.

883
00:49:46.780 --> 00:49:47.880
They're both crockpots.

884
00:49:48.420 --> 00:49:52.060
And so it's like, oh, well, is there even anything here?

885
00:49:52.140 --> 00:49:53.460
Are we even excited about this?

886
00:49:53.560 --> 00:49:55.140
You know how I knew that they were both crockpots

887
00:49:55.140 --> 00:49:58.220
before she even said that they had this conversation,

888
00:49:58.280 --> 00:49:59.980
which I'm so excited they have this conversation.

889
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:07.360
but I was about to give her this advice already when she said that they wanted downtime from their dates.

890
00:50:07.960 --> 00:50:13.640
They didn't want to go on a marathon date. They just wanted chunks of time with alone time by themselves.

891
00:50:13.780 --> 00:50:19.740
Alright, for people that are introverted, those are people that need to recuperate from you know,

892
00:50:20.600 --> 00:50:21.100
this,

893
00:50:21.940 --> 00:50:22.620
this

894
00:50:22.620 --> 00:50:26.340
getting to know someone and so that's important. Okay, so

895
00:50:26.760 --> 00:50:29.900
now that you guys have had that conversation and

896
00:50:30.000 --> 00:50:35.180
things are not heating up that quick and you already know why they're not heating up that quick, but you enjoyed

897
00:50:36.140 --> 00:50:39.940
his personality, you enjoyed time with him, you had fun with him, those are all green flags.

898
00:50:41.000 --> 00:50:47.620
Next visit, let's see what happens. It is because of your personality, because you've only seen each other once in person,

899
00:50:47.700 --> 00:50:49.720
it's way too early to gauge it.

900
00:50:50.460 --> 00:50:52.400
Let's see what happens this next time around.

901
00:50:52.940 --> 00:50:54.400
If you have fun again,

902
00:50:54.400 --> 00:51:00.400
you know, you're kind of growing on each other, because long distance, especially in Texas to

903
00:51:01.640 --> 00:51:06.920
California, you're gonna have to make a decision soon about whether or not you really want to invest in this,

904
00:51:08.380 --> 00:51:08.940
right?

905
00:51:09.420 --> 00:51:11.800
You don't want to just leave it hanging out there forever.

906
00:51:12.500 --> 00:51:17.820
So let's see and I really want you to challenge yourself to get more vulnerable on this next go-round.

907
00:51:19.140 --> 00:51:20.240
I know it's hard,

908
00:51:20.240 --> 00:51:25.360
but I'm gonna challenge you to get more vulnerable. If you have to buy one of those decks of cards that says we're not really

909
00:51:25.360 --> 00:51:27.140
strangers, there's a game you can play.

910
00:51:28.000 --> 00:51:30.880
Is that what it's called you guys? We're not, we're not strangers.

911
00:51:32.940 --> 00:51:34.780
Does anyone know the game I'm talking about?

912
00:51:37.920 --> 00:51:38.700
Yes, that's the name.

913
00:51:39.740 --> 00:51:43.640
Yeah, okay, we're not strangers. Buy that, it's fun.

914
00:51:44.120 --> 00:51:48.640
It'll, it'll cause you to have to ask each other all kinds of personal inappropriate questions and it'll be great.

915
00:51:49.400 --> 00:51:51.100
Okay, so

916
00:51:51.800 --> 00:51:56.740
but you have to up the ante, you have to get to a place where you can get

917
00:51:57.060 --> 00:52:02.540
more vulnerable on this next go-around, so you can see if there's any emotional connection, okay?

918
00:52:03.760 --> 00:52:09.980
Sounds good. Thanks. Alright, keep us posted. I'm so glad that you guys were mature enough to have that conversation. That's really great.

919
00:52:10.240 --> 00:52:13.800
That's really a green flag for both of you. Hey Kylie, what's up?

920
00:52:15.340 --> 00:52:20.880
Hello. I just had a question on if you're having like a

921
00:52:21.300 --> 00:52:27.760
bigger type of conversation and this, like the person falls off the face of the earth,

922
00:52:28.420 --> 00:52:35.480
how do I best manage like my emotions towards that? Because I would tend to lean towards anxious attachment while,

923
00:52:36.740 --> 00:52:42.580
and so I struggle more giving somebody the space to process, so I was just wondering how I can best manage

924
00:52:42.580 --> 00:52:47.420
my emotions in those types of situations.

925
00:52:47.700 --> 00:52:52.700
Okay, hold on. So you're having, you're having a deeper conversation and they just ghosted you?

926
00:52:54.000 --> 00:52:57.100
Yep, pretty, well they answered me now, but it was like,

927
00:52:58.600 --> 00:53:00.680
like days after the fact.

928
00:53:01.680 --> 00:53:03.740
Can you tell us what you were talking about?

929
00:53:04.280 --> 00:53:08.660
Yeah, just boundaries and relationships. So like what I would view

930
00:53:08.660 --> 00:53:15.240
as like good boundaries. We have like a two-year friendship that was kind of turning into a relationship

931
00:53:15.240 --> 00:53:21.360
and then we're discussing like boundaries within intimacy and stuff like that. We don't live close to each other.

932
00:53:21.380 --> 00:53:25.840
So you were like talking about, you're talking about no sex before marriage kind of stuff?

933
00:53:26.340 --> 00:53:28.320
Yeah, that type of stuff.

934
00:53:28.780 --> 00:53:31.660
And then they just didn't answer for a couple days?

935
00:53:32.200 --> 00:53:37.360
Yeah, and so because I know them for two years and I know they'd lean towards avoidant and needing time to process,

936
00:53:37.360 --> 00:53:40.120
I just didn't reach out and I was just like kind of whatever.

937
00:53:41.080 --> 00:53:46.040
But then I am like... Did you feel like the conversation was getting like

938
00:53:47.400 --> 00:53:48.800
antagonistic in some way?

939
00:53:49.680 --> 00:53:56.740
No, it was actually like super well-received because I put my boundaries up and I was like not sure what to expect from him because

940
00:53:57.620 --> 00:53:59.760
initially when we had

941
00:53:59.760 --> 00:54:02.900
started our friendship, our values were different. So that's why we never

942
00:54:03.660 --> 00:54:05.200
went into like the dating aspect.

943
00:54:06.320 --> 00:54:09.540
Yeah, and so now stuff had like changed. So we had like

944
00:54:10.680 --> 00:54:14.760
entered into some type of talking phase, I would call it, not like necessarily courting.

945
00:54:15.320 --> 00:54:19.020
And so we were talking back and forth about this because we know so much

946
00:54:19.060 --> 00:54:22.260
else about each other from the depth of our friendship built.

947
00:54:23.940 --> 00:54:30.580
So then when I... What was the last thing that you said to him before he just went radio silent for two days?

948
00:54:30.920 --> 00:54:32.100
What was the last thing that was said?

949
00:54:33.640 --> 00:54:37.300
I sent him like a little bit of a more in-depth thing saying like, hey,

950
00:54:37.300 --> 00:54:41.000
I've looked into it and kind of read the Bible more so on

951
00:54:42.440 --> 00:54:47.680
my view on like sex and sexual and morality and stuff like that. And I was kind of like, these are my boundaries.

952
00:54:47.880 --> 00:54:53.340
So I listed out specifically like, I'm like, I don't like listing out it because it's gonna be different for everybody.

953
00:54:53.600 --> 00:54:55.580
But I said you're gonna want an idea.

954
00:54:55.720 --> 00:54:59.980
So this is what they are and I put them in there and then I kind of said I just feel like

955
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:03.460
Like I need to be honest about what I need to do to honor God if we're going to go forward

956
00:55:03.460 --> 00:55:04.260
in this relationship.

957
00:55:04.520 --> 00:55:09.220
And so then he read it and just didn't respond for, I don't know, it was more than a couple

958
00:55:09.840 --> 00:55:11.660
days, but he responded now.

959
00:55:12.340 --> 00:55:12.340


960
00:55:13.260 --> 00:55:13.560
Okay.

961
00:55:13.560 --> 00:55:14.760
It was more than a couple days.

962
00:55:14.860 --> 00:55:22.200
So he literally just left you on read when you said, Hey, this is what I need, um, in

963
00:55:22.200 --> 00:55:23.380
order to move forward in relationship.

964
00:55:23.540 --> 00:55:24.300
This is where I am.

965
00:55:24.360 --> 00:55:25.740
This is what I believe now.

966
00:55:25.800 --> 00:55:26.920
This is why I believe it.

967
00:55:26.920 --> 00:55:29.720
And then he didn't respond for a week?

968
00:55:30.900 --> 00:55:33.040
Um, probably four days.

969
00:55:33.240 --> 00:55:33.420
How long?

970
00:55:33.840 --> 00:55:34.140
Three.

971
00:55:34.600 --> 00:55:38.280
I think I sent the message on either Sunday or Monday and he responded today.

972
00:55:39.400 --> 00:55:40.000
Okay.

973
00:55:40.000 --> 00:55:41.520
And what did he say when he responded?

974
00:55:43.380 --> 00:55:50.860
He said basically that, um, like thanks for giving him the time to process these things

975
00:55:51.380 --> 00:55:55.100
and that he doesn't, how did he respond?

976
00:55:55.100 --> 00:56:00.180
And, um, the more he thinks about it, the more he's like, I, I, I'm coming to a place

977
00:56:00.180 --> 00:56:04.420
where I want to have a Christ-centered relationship, but I don't have the like best relationship

978
00:56:04.420 --> 00:56:04.940
with him.

979
00:56:04.980 --> 00:56:08.580
He's talked to his pastor and his friend about his faith walk.

980
00:56:08.800 --> 00:56:15.360
And then he kind of like went on about, um, like, he's like, I don't not want, I want

981
00:56:15.360 --> 00:56:16.100
to be friends.

982
00:56:16.120 --> 00:56:17.840
Your friendship has meant the world to me.

983
00:56:17.840 --> 00:56:19.760
So I don't think anything will change like that.

984
00:56:19.880 --> 00:56:24.100
But in my head, I'm kind of like, I don't think, I don't really know.

985
00:56:24.100 --> 00:56:27.240
I'm, I'm just going to sit with that, but he responded really well.

986
00:56:27.280 --> 00:56:31.100
It was just like, I felt like it was kind of rude to leave me hanging, not even say

987
00:56:31.120 --> 00:56:33.920
a single word for, okay.

988
00:56:34.020 --> 00:56:37.180
First of all, first of all, it wasn't kind of rude.

989
00:56:37.600 --> 00:56:39.860
It was very rude, first of all.

990
00:56:40.500 --> 00:56:43.940
And second of all, you know, if you would've told me this is someone that you just started

991
00:56:43.940 --> 00:56:47.240
talking to on a dating app, then I would be like, Oh yeah, you know, just like, don't

992
00:56:47.240 --> 00:56:48.060
give them the time of day.

993
00:56:48.060 --> 00:56:51.760
But the fact that you guys have known each other for two years and just so you know,

994
00:56:51.760 --> 00:56:54.120
not thanks for giving me the time to process.

995
00:56:56.540 --> 00:56:59.120
People have to ask for time to process.

996
00:56:59.540 --> 00:56:59.580
Wow.

997
00:56:59.600 --> 00:57:00.420
That's really heavy.

998
00:57:00.580 --> 00:57:02.280
You know, thank you for sharing that with me.

999
00:57:02.520 --> 00:57:04.040
Um, I appreciate your vulnerability.

1000
00:57:04.280 --> 00:57:06.220
I'm going to need some time to think about this.

1001
00:57:06.340 --> 00:57:08.240
Let me get back to you about my feelings on this.

1002
00:57:08.260 --> 00:57:09.240
It's called communication.

1003
00:57:10.060 --> 00:57:10.540
All right.

1004
00:57:10.900 --> 00:57:15.200
You don't just read it and leave them on red.

1005
00:57:15.400 --> 00:57:15.880
Okay.

1006
00:57:15.880 --> 00:57:22.000
That is that just so you know, that's for me, that's the bigger yellow turning red flag

1007
00:57:22.000 --> 00:57:23.180
about this situation.

1008
00:57:24.740 --> 00:57:31.400
Because that means that, you know, this person is going to, you know, um, their self preservation

1009
00:57:31.460 --> 00:57:38.880
technique is to leave when something isn't what they want, right.

1010
00:57:38.880 --> 00:57:41.940
Or to freeze or to, you know, disappear.

1011
00:57:41.940 --> 00:57:44.380
And you definitely don't want that in a relationship.

1012
00:57:44.940 --> 00:57:48.600
So it sounds to me like you lay down what you're really believing right now.

1013
00:57:48.640 --> 00:57:52.100
And he's saying, yeah, that sounds good in a perfect world, but I'm not there right now.

1014
00:57:52.100 --> 00:57:53.840
And so let's just be friends.

1015
00:57:54.780 --> 00:57:56.040
Yeah, pretty much.

1016
00:57:56.440 --> 00:58:01.440
The problem is, is that, and, and, and you, you know, I hope you feel like you dodged

1017
00:58:01.440 --> 00:58:06.360
a bullet because if you didn't have those boundaries and you got into a sexual or physical

1018
00:58:06.380 --> 00:58:10.820
relationship with this person, this person obviously doesn't know how to access their

1019
00:58:11.500 --> 00:58:13.020
deeper feelings or emotions.

1020
00:58:13.640 --> 00:58:17.380
And they would, they would just be checking out a lot.

1021
00:58:18.820 --> 00:58:22.020
Well, we don't live like we are long distance as it is.

1022
00:58:22.060 --> 00:58:25.360
So that's kind of like, I could see how that would be a really big issue.

1023
00:58:26.020 --> 00:58:26.460
Yeah.

1024
00:58:26.460 --> 00:58:30.260
I feel like you got the answer that you needed when he disappeared like that.

1025
00:58:30.340 --> 00:58:32.000
That was really all the answer that you needed.

1026
00:58:33.240 --> 00:58:33.680
Okay.

1027
00:58:35.540 --> 00:58:36.220
Thank you.

1028
00:58:36.840 --> 00:58:37.120
Yeah.

1029
00:58:37.120 --> 00:58:38.580
And I really want to encourage you.

1030
00:58:38.580 --> 00:58:40.600
I really want to encourage you going forward.

1031
00:58:40.640 --> 00:58:41.940
I'd like to say this to encourage you.

1032
00:58:41.940 --> 00:58:45.040
There are a lot of men that are going to respect boundaries.

1033
00:58:45.340 --> 00:58:46.520
They're not going to push boundaries.

1034
00:58:47.040 --> 00:58:50.840
They have the same boundaries, you know, they, they want, they want to do the right

1035
00:58:50.840 --> 00:58:54.440
things and they want to do things that they know are, you know, going to set the

1036
00:58:54.440 --> 00:58:58.820
relationship up for future success, um, and spiritual success as well.

1037
00:58:58.820 --> 00:59:00.100
And so they're out there.

1038
00:59:00.240 --> 00:59:02.660
There's a lot more of them than people think there are.

1039
00:59:04.000 --> 00:59:07.800
And, um, you know, and you deserve one of those people.

1040
00:59:09.160 --> 00:59:09.620
Thanks.

1041
00:59:10.100 --> 00:59:10.560
You're welcome.

1042
00:59:11.940 --> 00:59:12.260
All right.

1043
00:59:12.260 --> 00:59:14.340
You guys, communication is huge.

1044
00:59:14.880 --> 00:59:18.880
We have to first of all, it's the lifeblood of all relationship.

1045
00:59:19.120 --> 00:59:21.340
Communication is lifeblood of all relationship.

1046
00:59:21.440 --> 00:59:26.200
When all the butterflies fly out and go away because they will.

1047
00:59:26.580 --> 00:59:26.700
Okay.

1048
00:59:26.700 --> 00:59:28.080
You got butterflies in your belly.

1049
00:59:28.280 --> 00:59:28.540
Great.

1050
00:59:28.820 --> 00:59:31.340
They're going to eventually fly out or they're going to die.

1051
00:59:32.040 --> 00:59:33.440
They're just going to disappear.

1052
00:59:33.840 --> 00:59:34.360
Okay.

1053
00:59:34.360 --> 00:59:39.040
And so all the chemistry, all the attraction, all of these superficial and

1054
00:59:39.040 --> 00:59:45.160
things, they have to give way to the supernatural things and the supernatural

1055
00:59:45.160 --> 00:59:47.220
things are honor and respect.

1056
00:59:48.400 --> 00:59:51.680
Um, they are a vulnerability, their communication.

1057
00:59:51.920 --> 00:59:53.900
We have to have those things in relationship.

1058
00:59:54.080 --> 00:59:58.360
And so if you're trying to have relationship with someone who cannot

1059
00:59:58.360 --> 00:59:59.960
communicate, they cannot be vulnerable.

1060
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:04.520
It's okay if they have to process, we're not all microwaves, like I just said, some of

1061
01:00:04.520 --> 01:00:08.980
us are crockpots, some of us need some time to process, but they have to be self-aware

1062
01:00:08.980 --> 01:00:13.860
about that and they have to be able to communicate that to us and say, hey, I'm going to need

1063
01:00:13.860 --> 01:00:15.220
some time to think about this.

1064
01:00:15.340 --> 01:00:16.920
I'm not blowing you off.

1065
01:00:18.320 --> 01:00:19.360
I'm not upset.

1066
01:00:19.620 --> 01:00:24.220
I just don't know how I feel about it and it needs some time to think about how I feel

1067
01:00:24.220 --> 01:00:24.760
about it.

1068
01:00:24.920 --> 01:00:26.160
That's called maturity.

1069
01:00:26.740 --> 01:00:30.900
That's the signs that someone's ready for a relationship, no matter what their communication

1070
01:00:30.900 --> 01:00:31.460
style is.

1071
01:00:31.620 --> 01:00:34.120
We're all going to have different communication styles, that's not a deal breaker.

1072
01:00:35.520 --> 01:00:41.360
Respecting each other's communication styles and maturing in your own communication style,

1073
01:00:41.860 --> 01:00:46.500
understanding what you need and being able to express it, that is the green flag.

1074
01:00:47.760 --> 01:00:48.300
Got it?

1075
01:00:49.040 --> 01:00:53.220
There isn't anyone in here, there's no one in our community, I think the youngest person

1076
01:00:53.220 --> 01:00:58.580
we've ever had was 21 and she's married now, she's one of our success stories, but most

1077
01:00:58.580 --> 01:01:02.920
of the people that are in our program are 25 and up and the majority of the people in

1078
01:01:02.920 --> 01:01:08.300
our program are 35 and up, old enough to know better, old enough to know how to use your

1079
01:01:09.660 --> 01:01:12.200
words to talk about what you want and what you need.

1080
01:01:13.840 --> 01:01:15.420
Let's get there.

1081
01:01:15.820 --> 01:01:18.200
She said that she leans towards anxious attachment.

1082
01:01:18.200 --> 01:01:24.080
I really want to talk about that for a second, because your girl, little old me, Jackie D,

1083
01:01:24.260 --> 01:01:29.540
is getting certified in integrative attachment theory, so I'm going to help you integrate

1084
01:01:29.640 --> 01:01:30.620
your attachment styles.

1085
01:01:30.900 --> 01:01:35.800
In fact, I'll be ready to do that just really soon, I'll be certified probably in the next

1086
01:01:35.800 --> 01:01:43.320
30 days or so and we are going to be having a lot of stuff around attachment style.

1087
01:01:43.320 --> 01:01:49.320
We all have one and it's important that we understand what makes us tick, what kind of

1088
01:01:49.440 --> 01:01:56.200
behaviors and what kind of patterns do we get into, what kind of cycles do we get into

1089
01:01:56.200 --> 01:02:00.000
when there is the possibility of a relationship, not even a relationship, but the possibility

1090
01:02:00.260 --> 01:02:00.780
of a relationship.

1091
01:02:01.140 --> 01:02:07.240
Those of you that skew towards preoccupied anxious attachment, not just anxious attachment,

1092
01:02:07.380 --> 01:02:11.700
but preoccupied anxious attachment, you have to be careful because you will be a people

1093
01:02:11.700 --> 01:02:11.980
pleaser.

1094
01:02:12.520 --> 01:02:16.960
You will do whatever that person wants as long as they promise to love you back, right?

1095
01:02:16.960 --> 01:02:20.760
You will give them what they want, you will say what they want, you will be what they

1096
01:02:20.760 --> 01:02:22.340
want, but that's not sustainable.

1097
01:02:23.640 --> 01:02:24.540
It's not.

1098
01:02:25.200 --> 01:02:31.180
You're going to, you're going to be so disloyal to yourself.

1099
01:02:31.780 --> 01:02:32.700
You really are.

1100
01:02:32.920 --> 01:02:39.620
You are going to throw yourself under the bus in order to make someone else happy and

1101
01:02:39.620 --> 01:02:47.400
to make someone else feel satisfied or fixed or stable or not scare them off.

1102
01:02:48.020 --> 01:02:51.240
And it is going to blow up in your face so hard.

1103
01:02:52.200 --> 01:02:56.120
You might even marry that person like I did my first husband in that state.

1104
01:02:56.240 --> 01:02:58.180
Oh, I was such a preoccupied anxious attacher.

1105
01:02:58.660 --> 01:03:03.100
I would have been whatever he wanted, whatever one you want me to purple, I'll be purple.

1106
01:03:03.180 --> 01:03:07.480
You want me to be, you know, you want me to be shorter, I'll hunch over.

1107
01:03:07.480 --> 01:03:09.140
You want me to wear certain clothes.

1108
01:03:09.860 --> 01:03:12.140
Y'all, I let that man tell me how to dress.

1109
01:03:12.340 --> 01:03:14.120
It was bad news bears.

1110
01:03:14.280 --> 01:03:14.720
Okay.

1111
01:03:15.520 --> 01:03:16.500
And guess what?

1112
01:03:16.700 --> 01:03:21.160
Once you're in the relationship, you don't want to play that role anymore.

1113
01:03:21.180 --> 01:03:25.920
You don't want to act and pretend that everything's okay when it's not.

1114
01:03:26.000 --> 01:03:27.200
You don't want to do it.

1115
01:03:28.140 --> 01:03:29.020
You don't.

1116
01:03:29.240 --> 01:03:31.540
And if you do it, it's going to make you sick.

1117
01:03:32.120 --> 01:03:34.720
It's going to give you, it's going to give you some mental health stuff.

1118
01:03:35.280 --> 01:03:38.340
And so it's important that we don't do that anymore and we're not going to, all right,

1119
01:03:38.420 --> 01:03:42.620
got to be true to ourselves and we got to communicate our needs.

1120
01:03:42.920 --> 01:03:47.100
And if someone thinks that we're too needy, then they're not the right person for us.

1121
01:03:47.480 --> 01:03:51.360
If someone thinks that the things that we believe and want are not the right things,

1122
01:03:51.520 --> 01:03:53.020
then they're not the right person for us.

1123
01:03:53.320 --> 01:03:56.400
If someone isn't willing to meet us where we are, then they're not the right person

1124
01:03:56.400 --> 01:03:56.940
for us.

1125
01:03:56.980 --> 01:03:57.920
And that's okay.

1126
01:03:58.180 --> 01:03:59.940
There's eight plus billion people in the world.

1127
01:04:00.540 --> 01:04:00.820
Thank you.

1128
01:04:01.000 --> 01:04:01.400
Next.

1129
01:04:02.920 --> 01:04:03.720
All right.

1130
01:04:04.740 --> 01:04:05.240
Christiana.

1131
01:04:08.340 --> 01:04:09.000
Hi, Jacqueline.

1132
01:04:09.820 --> 01:04:10.060
Hi.

1133
01:04:10.200 --> 01:04:15.480
I have a question for you about, I guess a little bit about social media.

1134
01:04:15.840 --> 01:04:18.540
So yeah, I follow you and I love all the content you're putting out.

1135
01:04:18.600 --> 01:04:24.180
And so I'm starting to get other influencers who are also Christian men and women coaching

1136
01:04:24.180 --> 01:04:25.720
towards the same sort of thing.

1137
01:04:25.720 --> 01:04:31.080
And I think some of the male perspectives have been very interesting for me to learn

1138
01:04:31.080 --> 01:04:34.680
and to see what my reaction is to that and things you're describing.

1139
01:04:35.360 --> 01:04:40.200
But I'm feeling like I don't feel like I'm meeting people like this in real life, like

1140
01:04:40.200 --> 01:04:46.000
lots of great people, but not who seem to have quite the same alignment of values and

1141
01:04:46.000 --> 01:04:48.540
actions and priorities and what they're working towards.

1142
01:04:48.740 --> 01:04:54.040
And I don't know if it's a case of even though they're a Christian influencer, it's still

1143
01:04:54.040 --> 01:04:58.100
not real or if that really is the value and somebody is living it out.

1144
01:04:58.200 --> 01:04:59.620
And I just need to keep going.

1145
01:05:00.940 --> 01:05:02.800
Yeah, it's a really great question.

1146
01:05:02.900 --> 01:05:07.800
So what she's saying is that she follows me on Instagram and because of the algorithm,

1147
01:05:08.200 --> 01:05:11.780
Instagram is showing her other influencers that are talking about the subjects that I

1148
01:05:11.780 --> 01:05:17.300
talk about, which is faith-based dating or, you know, Christian marriage or whatever.

1149
01:05:17.880 --> 01:05:24.880
And she's saying that the male influencers on Instagram, you know, are basically, you

1150
01:05:24.880 --> 01:05:31.400
know, giving this virtuous kind of idea of what we should expect from men and what they

1151
01:05:31.860 --> 01:05:35.700
believe and what they're doing towards their woman or what they would do towards women.

1152
01:05:35.840 --> 01:05:39.220
You guys, it's called sales, okay?

1153
01:05:40.160 --> 01:05:45.240
They want to be influencers, you know, and they know that they have a primarily female

1154
01:05:45.240 --> 01:05:45.660
audience.

1155
01:05:45.760 --> 01:05:48.540
That's what's beautiful about me is like, I'm going to tell you like it is, you don't

1156
01:05:48.540 --> 01:05:49.360
like me, that's okay.

1157
01:05:49.360 --> 01:05:50.360
You don't got to follow me.

1158
01:05:50.920 --> 01:05:56.960
But they have a primarily female audience and in order to have 150,000 followers, they

1159
01:05:56.960 --> 01:05:58.040
need to build women up.

1160
01:05:58.080 --> 01:06:00.340
They need to tell women, hey, there's nothing wrong with you.

1161
01:06:00.400 --> 01:06:03.760
There's just stuff wrong with men and this is what men need to do and this is what men

1162
01:06:03.760 --> 01:06:06.640
need to be and you shouldn't settle for any man that's not like this.

1163
01:06:06.860 --> 01:06:07.840
But here's the thing.

1164
01:06:07.980 --> 01:06:09.980
There's a lot wrong with women.

1165
01:06:10.040 --> 01:06:11.480
It's not just men out here that are broken.

1166
01:06:11.680 --> 01:06:12.480
Women are broken too.

1167
01:06:12.980 --> 01:06:18.500
And so we got a whole women accountable for what they're doing that is not conducive to

1168
01:06:18.500 --> 01:06:19.840
healthy relationship.

1169
01:06:20.560 --> 01:06:22.480
And so oftentimes you won't see that.

1170
01:06:22.740 --> 01:06:27.040
So this is how you gauge whether or not you're following the right influencer.

1171
01:06:27.400 --> 01:06:30.200
They call both sexes out equally.

1172
01:06:31.520 --> 01:06:36.980
You know, are they saying, hey, you know, don't settle for a guy that doesn't do all

1173
01:06:36.980 --> 01:06:41.220
this for you because you're a queen and you deserve to be treated this way and you know,

1174
01:06:41.220 --> 01:06:44.360
you're God's daughter and blah, blah, blah, and don't settle.

1175
01:06:44.880 --> 01:06:49.900
But they're also not calling you out and saying, hey, if you're operating in this stuff, then

1176
01:06:49.900 --> 01:06:51.960
you know, you're not operating like God's daughter.

1177
01:06:52.420 --> 01:06:56.220
You're not doing the things that you need to do in order to attract a healthy, godly

1178
01:06:56.220 --> 01:06:56.520
man.

1179
01:06:56.640 --> 01:06:59.540
And so that's kind of how you can gauge that.

1180
01:06:59.800 --> 01:07:06.500
Don't, don't, don't make, don't let them make you feel like a guy needs to be perfect or

1181
01:07:06.500 --> 01:07:08.100
do everything right because there's no such man.

1182
01:07:08.360 --> 01:07:09.920
And they're not one of those men either.

1183
01:07:09.920 --> 01:07:15.280
They just know because of marketing what women want to hear and they're telling us.

1184
01:07:16.160 --> 01:07:17.000
Thank you.

1185
01:07:17.620 --> 01:07:18.140
Yes.

1186
01:07:18.200 --> 01:07:18.640
You're welcome.

1187
01:07:18.940 --> 01:07:19.460
Great question.

1188
01:07:20.340 --> 01:07:21.160
Glad you asked it.

1189
01:07:21.700 --> 01:07:22.360
It's a great question.

1190
01:07:24.000 --> 01:07:25.280
It's a great question.

1191
01:07:25.360 --> 01:07:30.140
You guys, there's a reason, and I give all the glory to God that we've had over 1600

1192
01:07:30.140 --> 01:07:31.480
success stories in this movement.

1193
01:07:32.260 --> 01:07:38.180
It's because we're doing our work and we're, we're not making excuses about our work.

1194
01:07:38.940 --> 01:07:42.900
We've entered into a supernatural process called heartwork and we are allowing God to

1195
01:07:42.900 --> 01:07:47.960
show us where we're stuck and why we're stuck and we're understanding that we don't need

1196
01:07:47.960 --> 01:07:50.640
a perfect person and we don't need an easy love story.

1197
01:07:52.300 --> 01:07:58.540
We don't need to fantasize anymore about, you know, this person that's out there that's

1198
01:07:58.540 --> 01:08:03.960
going to be our person and you know, and get, and get wrapped up in all kinds of unrealistic

1199
01:08:03.960 --> 01:08:06.100
stuff that's going to keep us single.

1200
01:08:07.960 --> 01:08:10.580
All we need is someone who's trying.

1201
01:08:11.280 --> 01:08:12.020
That's the green flag.

1202
01:08:12.420 --> 01:08:16.100
All we need is someone who is self-aware, someone who's dealing with their stuff, someone

1203
01:08:16.100 --> 01:08:17.200
who has surrendered to God.

1204
01:08:17.439 --> 01:08:18.439
Those are the things that we need.

1205
01:08:18.580 --> 01:08:19.460
We do not need perfection.

1206
01:08:19.640 --> 01:08:20.460
We need progress.

1207
01:08:24.100 --> 01:08:24.500
Coolio.

1208
01:08:26.140 --> 01:08:28.960
All right, you guys, well, we're a little bit over time.

1209
01:08:29.100 --> 01:08:32.760
I'm just going to see you do a little popcorn, a pop, a little popcorn round.

1210
01:08:32.760 --> 01:08:39.359
So if you have a question, put it in the chat and I'm just going to answer a few until we

1211
01:08:39.359 --> 01:08:42.720
get to six, until we get to 815 here.

1212
01:08:44.819 --> 01:08:45.620
Let's see.

1213
01:08:45.640 --> 01:08:46.920
I did see his question.

1214
01:08:47.080 --> 01:08:50.880
I want to go back and try to get, hold on.

1215
01:08:55.200 --> 01:08:56.819
How soon can we bring up the sex thing?

1216
01:08:56.859 --> 01:08:59.580
I waited four to five dates in the past and that was too long.

1217
01:08:59.740 --> 01:09:01.319
Both guys didn't want to wait.

1218
01:09:01.880 --> 01:09:08.560
Well, Nora, you know, I like the litmus test of if the, if their chemistry is strong and,

1219
01:09:08.580 --> 01:09:13.080
you know, the attraction is strong, like right from the get go, you know, a lot of people

1220
01:09:13.080 --> 01:09:17.160
are wanting to be kissing someone on the first date because they're just so attracted to

1221
01:09:17.160 --> 01:09:19.680
them or there's just romantic moments.

1222
01:09:19.680 --> 01:09:21.340
I would go ahead and have it right then.

1223
01:09:22.880 --> 01:09:27.540
You already know that your chemistry with this person is off the charts, right?

1224
01:09:27.560 --> 01:09:30.040
So you already know that this is going to come into play.

1225
01:09:30.040 --> 01:09:34.899
Now, if the chemistry is not there or if you're crockpots, the way that we talked with, with

1226
01:09:35.080 --> 01:09:43.700
Dean and it's not there, you don't feel, you know, you don't feel, you know, that, that

1227
01:09:43.840 --> 01:09:49.380
unspoken, like, I'll kiss you right now if you let me kind of feelings, then you can

1228
01:09:49.380 --> 01:09:53.920
wait a little bit longer and four or five dates in, you're like, neither one of them

1229
01:09:53.920 --> 01:09:55.100
wanted to wait until marriage.

1230
01:09:55.840 --> 01:09:56.800
Well, okay.

1231
01:09:57.100 --> 01:09:57.800
That sucks.

1232
01:09:58.620 --> 01:09:59.480
It does.

1233
01:09:59.600 --> 01:09:59.700
It sucks.

1234
01:09:59.780 --> 01:09:59.940
It sucks.

1235
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:03.100
that, you know, that they were going to allow that to be a deal breaker and it also sucks

1236
01:10:03.100 --> 01:10:08.520
if they are professing Christianity that they don't want to wait until marriage.

1237
01:10:09.640 --> 01:10:13.780
And Nora, I don't know if that's true or not, I think that it's more important to find out

1238
01:10:14.120 --> 01:10:19.460
through conversation about what you enjoy and, you know, where you, where you're leading

1239
01:10:19.460 --> 01:10:24.040
your life to about their spiritual life.

1240
01:10:24.960 --> 01:10:30.000
And hopefully from their spiritual life, we can ascertain whether or not they're really

1241
01:10:30.000 --> 01:10:30.780
following Jesus.

1242
01:10:31.380 --> 01:10:32.640
Does that make sense to everyone?

1243
01:10:34.300 --> 01:10:39.320
The sex talk definitely needs to be had if, like I said, the chemistry is hot and getting

1244
01:10:39.500 --> 01:10:45.820
hotter, you go ahead and have that talk before, you know, before people get disappointed that

1245
01:10:45.820 --> 01:10:49.580
this isn't going somewhere that they want it to go, that it's not going to go.

1246
01:10:50.140 --> 01:10:56.180
And then secondly, if we really are ourselves and we're vulnerable and we're just real about

1247
01:10:56.180 --> 01:11:01.280
who we are and what we're doing in our lives and where we spend our weekends and how important

1248
01:11:01.280 --> 01:11:05.340
spiritual community is to us, then that person's going to weed themselves out.

1249
01:11:06.900 --> 01:11:13.680
But if they match us in that desire, then we can probably, probably, not always, but

1250
01:11:13.680 --> 01:11:19.480
we can probably ascertain from that response that they also are trying to follow Jesus

1251
01:11:19.480 --> 01:11:21.120
in their sexuality as well.

1252
01:11:22.080 --> 01:11:29.900
And if not, then shame on them, you know, seriously, if they're fasting Christianity

1253
01:11:29.900 --> 01:11:34.340
and they're saying that they're following Christ, but they want to have sex before marriage,

1254
01:11:34.440 --> 01:11:35.040
then guess what?

1255
01:11:35.120 --> 01:11:36.480
One of those things are not true.

1256
01:11:37.720 --> 01:11:39.360
One of those things are not true.

1257
01:11:39.660 --> 01:11:40.620
Which one is it?

1258
01:11:40.620 --> 01:11:42.480
I'll let you be the judge of that.

1259
01:11:42.840 --> 01:11:43.340
Okay.

1260
01:11:44.640 --> 01:11:50.720
And you guys, I'm not jaded and I'm not being judgmental, but I'm really, I'm really, really,

1261
01:11:50.860 --> 01:11:54.160
no matter what you thought of Charlie Kirk, dude took a bullet for his faith.

1262
01:11:54.680 --> 01:11:55.080
Okay.

1263
01:11:55.400 --> 01:11:59.380
I've never seen one Charlie Kirk video in my entire life still to this day because I've

1264
01:11:59.380 --> 01:11:59.980
been on a sabbatical.

1265
01:12:00.220 --> 01:12:01.180
So I'm off social media.

1266
01:12:01.280 --> 01:12:05.640
So I haven't seen anything, but I will say this, it's time for us to start standing up

1267
01:12:05.640 --> 01:12:08.800
for what we believe and start, stop being so fricking wishy washy.

1268
01:12:09.720 --> 01:12:10.120
Okay.

1269
01:12:11.120 --> 01:12:16.920
If someone can't keep it in their pants until the wedding day, then what else, what else

1270
01:12:16.920 --> 01:12:18.120
are they compromising on?

1271
01:12:18.280 --> 01:12:19.680
It's kind of a big thing.

1272
01:12:20.760 --> 01:12:22.800
It's kind of an important thing.

1273
01:12:27.140 --> 01:12:34.460
And so if let's not profess Christianity, if we're not, if we're not really truly following

1274
01:12:34.660 --> 01:12:38.900
Jesus, if he's not a rabbi, then, you know, we're just playing church somewhere.

1275
01:12:38.900 --> 01:12:42.800
And if you're interested in being married to someone like that, then, you know, more

1276
01:12:42.800 --> 01:12:43.980
power to you.

1277
01:12:44.400 --> 01:12:50.280
But because things seem to be kind of getting a little cray cray out here, I would think

1278
01:12:50.280 --> 01:12:54.960
that most of you would want to be with someone who's really committed to continuing following

1279
01:12:54.960 --> 01:13:00.600
Jesus and following after the spirit and able to lead a family into the future and whatever

1280
01:13:00.600 --> 01:13:03.600
that future might hold for all of us.

1281
01:13:04.200 --> 01:13:04.760
Amen.

1282
01:13:06.920 --> 01:13:10.740
I know we don't really talk about all this kind of stuff a lot on our coaching calls.

1283
01:13:10.820 --> 01:13:20.240
We talk about it more on Supernatural Saturday, but seriously, if someone cannot commit and

1284
01:13:20.240 --> 01:13:22.440
you guys, it's, it's, it's not as hard as you think it is.

1285
01:13:22.440 --> 01:13:23.420
David and I were neighbors.

1286
01:13:23.580 --> 01:13:29.060
We were next door neighbors and I even lived at his house with him for a month before we

1287
01:13:29.060 --> 01:13:30.760
got married because my lease was up.

1288
01:13:31.580 --> 01:13:36.500
So after we were engaged, we lived together and we still did not have sex.

1289
01:13:36.740 --> 01:13:38.440
Oh my God.

1290
01:13:38.900 --> 01:13:40.280
You mean you can do it?

1291
01:13:40.280 --> 01:13:40.780
Yeah.

1292
01:13:40.880 --> 01:13:46.080
And it wasn't a religious situation where it was like, oh, we can't break the rules.

1293
01:13:46.420 --> 01:13:47.300
Don't break the rules.

1294
01:13:48.060 --> 01:13:50.100
God said, no, God said, no, no, no.

1295
01:13:50.260 --> 01:13:55.720
We understand the power and the spirituality of sexuality.

1296
01:13:56.120 --> 01:13:57.820
We have a revelation of that.

1297
01:13:58.220 --> 01:13:59.940
People need to get a revelation of that.

1298
01:13:59.940 --> 01:14:01.760
The Bible talks about it.

1299
01:14:03.220 --> 01:14:08.700
It talks about how you're actually taking something into your own body when you commit

1300
01:14:08.700 --> 01:14:09.260
that sin.

1301
01:14:10.520 --> 01:14:11.640
It's not just about committing a sin.

1302
01:14:11.820 --> 01:14:12.640
You can just repent.

1303
01:14:13.340 --> 01:14:14.180
Jesus died for you.

1304
01:14:14.320 --> 01:14:14.920
You're forgiven.

1305
01:14:15.240 --> 01:14:15.580
Move forward.

1306
01:14:16.160 --> 01:14:25.320
This is a particular situation where the consequences of it are that you're not really seeing that

1307
01:14:25.320 --> 01:14:27.900
clearly about this person anymore, right?

1308
01:14:27.940 --> 01:14:29.420
Red flags are being masked.

1309
01:14:29.420 --> 01:14:32.580
There's all kinds of different situations that are happening there.

1310
01:14:32.580 --> 01:14:37.300
And so if you are having a sexual relationship right now with someone that you're not married

1311
01:14:37.480 --> 01:14:39.960
to, just ask God to forgive you.

1312
01:14:41.620 --> 01:14:44.960
And repentance means change behavior and stop doing it.

1313
01:14:45.140 --> 01:14:50.340
Just tell that person, hey, listen, I'm not going to have sex with you anymore until we're

1314
01:14:50.340 --> 01:14:50.580
married.

1315
01:14:51.720 --> 01:14:54.360
I'm not going to have sex with you anymore until we're married.

1316
01:14:54.360 --> 01:14:57.500
And if you're just dating, that's going to be a pickle because they haven't even said

1317
01:14:57.500 --> 01:14:59.980
they want to marry you yet, but you're not.

1318
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:02.360
going to have sex outside of marriage anymore.

1319
01:15:02.480 --> 01:15:04.900
And guess what, they're either gonna meet you there

1320
01:15:04.900 --> 01:15:06.400
and say, you're right, we shouldn't be,

1321
01:15:06.680 --> 01:15:07.640
we shouldn't have been doing this.

1322
01:15:07.820 --> 01:15:09.660
I had, you guys, I'm just gonna be honest,

1323
01:15:09.700 --> 01:15:11.540
I had a couple just recently in Simbis,

1324
01:15:12.920 --> 01:15:16.160
they disclosed to me that they were living together

1325
01:15:16.380 --> 01:15:18.780
and obviously, you know, having sex, sleeping together.

1326
01:15:20.240 --> 01:15:22.460
And I just told him straight out, I was just like,

1327
01:15:22.460 --> 01:15:24.820
well, you know, this kind of puts me in an awkward position

1328
01:15:24.820 --> 01:15:26.480
because I'm trying to coach you

1329
01:15:26.680 --> 01:15:29.020
on how to save your marriage before it starts,

1330
01:15:29.020 --> 01:15:31.560
but you're already trying to drill holes

1331
01:15:31.560 --> 01:15:32.780
on the bottom of the boat.

1332
01:15:33.840 --> 01:15:35.580
You're already trying to sink the ship.

1333
01:15:36.960 --> 01:15:39.540
And so like, you know better than this,

1334
01:15:39.620 --> 01:15:40.860
they were both mature Christians.

1335
01:15:41.000 --> 01:15:44.100
And I was like, like, you know, like, okay,

1336
01:15:44.740 --> 01:15:46.880
I'm not here to judge you or shame you,

1337
01:15:47.080 --> 01:15:48.680
but what you're doing right now

1338
01:15:48.680 --> 01:15:50.580
is actually causing deception.

1339
01:15:51.640 --> 01:15:55.020
And so they came back to me and they're like,

1340
01:15:55.020 --> 01:15:58.200
hey, look, you know, we really thought about,

1341
01:15:58.680 --> 01:16:00.700
you know, what you said when you called us out

1342
01:16:01.160 --> 01:16:04.340
and we've decided that we are not going to have sex anymore

1343
01:16:04.340 --> 01:16:05.160
until we get married.

1344
01:16:05.880 --> 01:16:07.600
And one or two things are gonna happen

1345
01:16:07.600 --> 01:16:08.600
if you make that decision,

1346
01:16:08.720 --> 01:16:10.360
that person is gonna meet you there and say,

1347
01:16:10.480 --> 01:16:14.760
yeah, I wanna do not just what's right, but what's righteous.

1348
01:16:15.160 --> 01:16:18.880
I wanna set us up for a future together that is solid.

1349
01:16:19.260 --> 01:16:23.500
I don't want, you know, to build on a fleshly foundation

1350
01:16:23.500 --> 01:16:25.880
that's full, all this stuff,

1351
01:16:26.860 --> 01:16:29.420
because maybe we shouldn't be together at all.

1352
01:16:29.900 --> 01:16:30.700
Maybe we don't get along.

1353
01:16:30.920 --> 01:16:31.680
Maybe we're not compatible,

1354
01:16:31.860 --> 01:16:34.600
but all that's being masked by our sexual desire

1355
01:16:34.600 --> 01:16:36.500
for each other, right?

1356
01:16:37.220 --> 01:16:38.480
So one or two things are gonna happen.

1357
01:16:38.540 --> 01:16:39.160
They're gonna meet you there.

1358
01:16:39.240 --> 01:16:39.780
They're gonna agree.

1359
01:16:39.920 --> 01:16:40.920
They're not gonna try to tempt you.

1360
01:16:40.980 --> 01:16:42.160
They're not gonna try to push your boundaries.

1361
01:16:42.240 --> 01:16:43.440
They're not gonna say they agree,

1362
01:16:43.520 --> 01:16:45.160
but every time you guys are alone together,

1363
01:16:45.160 --> 01:16:46.900
they try to take it right back to there again.

1364
01:16:47.080 --> 01:16:48.180
They're gonna meet you there

1365
01:16:48.180 --> 01:16:50.160
and they're gonna help set up the guardrails

1366
01:16:50.160 --> 01:16:52.420
that keep you guys from going back to that place.

1367
01:16:52.960 --> 01:16:55.060
Or number two, they're just gonna break up with you.

1368
01:16:56.360 --> 01:16:57.300
And you know what?

1369
01:16:57.320 --> 01:16:58.420
That's fine too.

1370
01:17:00.160 --> 01:17:01.820
And some of you are afraid of that

1371
01:17:01.820 --> 01:17:03.760
and that's why you haven't had that conversation

1372
01:17:03.760 --> 01:17:05.080
because you don't wanna lose them.

1373
01:17:05.120 --> 01:17:07.320
Well, you're not losing a prize

1374
01:17:07.440 --> 01:17:11.820
if that person is not going to really partner with you

1375
01:17:11.980 --> 01:17:13.480
in following after Jesus,

1376
01:17:13.880 --> 01:17:15.000
especially in the day and age

1377
01:17:15.000 --> 01:17:16.440
that we're living in right now.

1378
01:17:16.720 --> 01:17:17.860
We don't need people

1379
01:17:17.860 --> 01:17:20.400
that are playing patty cake at church.

1380
01:17:20.400 --> 01:17:28.180
We need people who really truly want to be disciples.

1381
01:17:30.440 --> 01:17:30.820
Amen.

1382
01:17:34.380 --> 01:17:34.900
Amen.

1383
01:17:36.260 --> 01:17:37.700
I did not plan on saying all that,

1384
01:17:38.140 --> 01:17:40.220
but it's tight, but it's right.

1385
01:17:42.320 --> 01:17:43.020
Okay.

1386
01:17:47.620 --> 01:17:48.660
For those of you that are like,

1387
01:17:48.660 --> 01:17:50.240
hey, I asked someone if they go to church,

1388
01:17:50.360 --> 01:17:52.040
they're like, no, but can I go with you?

1389
01:17:52.140 --> 01:17:53.420
I mean, sure, they can go with you,

1390
01:17:53.420 --> 01:17:54.660
but it doesn't mean they're gonna be your boyfriend.

1391
01:17:55.480 --> 01:17:58.180
You're not out here discipling our future wives

1392
01:17:58.840 --> 01:18:00.180
or husbands, okay?

1393
01:18:00.720 --> 01:18:02.060
Can they go to church with you?

1394
01:18:02.140 --> 01:18:03.020
Sure, they can go to church,

1395
01:18:03.080 --> 01:18:04.460
but if they're gonna go to church with you

1396
01:18:04.460 --> 01:18:06.020
because they think that's gonna get you

1397
01:18:06.020 --> 01:18:07.040
into their good graces,

1398
01:18:07.400 --> 01:18:08.980
get them into your good graces,

1399
01:18:09.580 --> 01:18:11.340
then no, that's manipulation.

1400
01:18:12.400 --> 01:18:15.740
And you'll be able to tell the difference, okay?

1401
01:18:16.660 --> 01:18:19.080
I wanna tell you something that might hurt your feelings.

1402
01:18:19.520 --> 01:18:20.560
All of you, listen up.

1403
01:18:20.900 --> 01:18:22.960
We meet people for different reasons

1404
01:18:22.960 --> 01:18:25.040
and in different seasons, okay?

1405
01:18:25.040 --> 01:18:26.760
And so just because you meet someone

1406
01:18:26.760 --> 01:18:28.220
that's the opposite sex doesn't mean

1407
01:18:28.220 --> 01:18:32.520
that they're a potential match or love interest for you.

1408
01:18:32.680 --> 01:18:34.300
It's possible that you met them

1409
01:18:34.500 --> 01:18:38.460
because you're a believer and you're a disciple of Jesus,

1410
01:18:38.560 --> 01:18:41.080
and you're gonna meet people of the opposite sex

1411
01:18:41.080 --> 01:18:42.880
that need to hear about Jesus.

1412
01:18:44.540 --> 01:18:46.540
And if that's all you are in their life

1413
01:18:46.540 --> 01:18:47.960
is just to point them towards Jesus

1414
01:18:47.960 --> 01:18:50.140
and to show them that Jesus followers

1415
01:18:50.140 --> 01:18:53.400
are kind and good and loving people, then awesome.

1416
01:18:54.540 --> 01:18:56.540
You don't disciple date them.

1417
01:18:56.780 --> 01:18:58.540
You're not trying to missionary date them

1418
01:18:58.540 --> 01:18:59.700
like people used to talk about,

1419
01:18:59.800 --> 01:19:03.640
but also if they really truly are hungry for God

1420
01:19:04.020 --> 01:19:05.560
and they start coming to church

1421
01:19:05.560 --> 01:19:08.040
and they go after Jesus on their own,

1422
01:19:08.160 --> 01:19:09.360
not you pulling them along

1423
01:19:09.360 --> 01:19:10.820
or them trying to win you over

1424
01:19:10.820 --> 01:19:12.800
by trying to adopt your faith

1425
01:19:12.800 --> 01:19:15.700
so that you'll sleep with them, okay?

1426
01:19:15.700 --> 01:19:16.640
You know the difference.

1427
01:19:16.840 --> 01:19:18.980
And once again, if it's not that,

1428
01:19:19.100 --> 01:19:21.140
if it's truly genuine, then who knows?

1429
01:19:22.960 --> 01:19:23.480
Who knows?

1430
01:19:23.740 --> 01:19:26.820
There are people that end up marrying new believers.

1431
01:19:27.180 --> 01:19:28.420
It happens all the time.

1432
01:19:30.040 --> 01:19:30.980
It does.

1433
01:19:31.700 --> 01:19:33.720
But you have to be honest with yourself

1434
01:19:33.720 --> 01:19:34.960
about what's really happening

1435
01:19:35.060 --> 01:19:37.700
and don't tell yourself what you wish was happening

1436
01:19:37.700 --> 01:19:39.540
just because you don't wanna be alone.

1437
01:19:39.540 --> 01:19:41.380
I just wrote a blog about it.

1438
01:19:41.400 --> 01:19:43.060
There's a lot worse things than being single.

1439
01:19:44.520 --> 01:19:46.720
And one of those things is being in a relationship

1440
01:19:46.720 --> 01:19:47.540
that you regret.

1441
01:19:49.020 --> 01:19:53.800
And God forbid being in a marriage that you regret

1442
01:19:54.040 --> 01:19:55.440
and that you shouldn't be in.

1443
01:19:55.780 --> 01:19:57.380
That should have never happened in the first place

1444
01:19:58.720 --> 01:19:59.980
because you weren't on the same page.

1445
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:03.120
same page, but you overlooked all that stuff because you don't want to be alone.

1446
01:20:04.620 --> 01:20:05.420
Don't do that.

1447
01:20:07.140 --> 01:20:08.340
Please don't do that.

1448
01:20:08.980 --> 01:20:12.160
I know we talk about all the success stories here, but I just want to say this for the

1449
01:20:12.160 --> 01:20:12.300
record.

1450
01:20:12.540 --> 01:20:16.340
We've had more than I would like of divorces too.

1451
01:20:17.740 --> 01:20:21.140
People that have gotten married through this program and also are now divorced already

1452
01:20:21.720 --> 01:20:24.760
and if programs are only been around for five years you guys.

1453
01:20:25.860 --> 01:20:30.160
Now, if that number was less than five, I'd say, okay, yeah, you know, stuff happens.

1454
01:20:30.320 --> 01:20:34.980
People rush into things and once again, people rush into things because they don't want to

1455
01:20:34.980 --> 01:20:38.940
have sex outside marriage, so they get married too quick and, you know, or they're anxious

1456
01:20:39.100 --> 01:20:42.200
attachers and they get married too quick and all the different reasons why.

1457
01:20:42.280 --> 01:20:48.720
But I would think we probably have about out of 1600 success stories, we probably have

1458
01:20:48.720 --> 01:20:49.720
about 20 divorces.

1459
01:20:50.240 --> 01:20:51.580
And to me, that's too many.

1460
01:20:53.680 --> 01:20:54.720
That's too many.

1461
01:20:56.000 --> 01:21:03.780
And I will tell you in at least 50% of those, they never came, they never submitted the

1462
01:21:03.860 --> 01:21:07.600
relationship to the community and to the coaches, they never let anyone weigh in on it, they

1463
01:21:07.600 --> 01:21:08.720
just ran off and got married.

1464
01:21:08.860 --> 01:21:12.200
And then the other 50%, we told them not to get married.

1465
01:21:12.500 --> 01:21:16.740
We told them not to get married yet.

1466
01:21:17.260 --> 01:21:18.420
Hey, it's too soon.

1467
01:21:18.460 --> 01:21:19.180
It's too quick.

1468
01:21:19.220 --> 01:21:20.620
You don't know this person well enough.

1469
01:21:20.620 --> 01:21:21.620
You've been long distance.

1470
01:21:21.660 --> 01:21:22.320
It's not right.

1471
01:21:22.420 --> 01:21:23.580
Don't do it.

1472
01:21:24.560 --> 01:21:31.520
I am happy to report that one of my couples that I love so much, one of my first international

1473
01:21:31.520 --> 01:21:38.540
success stories, he popped in my DMs about two months ago and said, Hey, I got bad news.

1474
01:21:38.740 --> 01:21:45.680
You know, she wants a divorce and I've done everything that I know how to do and she just

1475
01:21:45.680 --> 01:21:46.400
wants a divorce.

1476
01:21:48.120 --> 01:21:53.480
And so I talked to him a little bit and then I prayed for them and I said, Hey, I'm really

1477
01:21:53.480 --> 01:21:57.740
praying that, you know, and he said, the divorce, the court date is set for this date.

1478
01:21:58.400 --> 01:22:02.500
And so I prayed for them and I said, Hey, you've done everything you can.

1479
01:22:02.560 --> 01:22:04.040
We just got to put it in God's hands now.

1480
01:22:04.340 --> 01:22:08.620
Well, I just heard from him last week and he said on the day, the court date, she showed

1481
01:22:08.620 --> 01:22:12.940
up and called the divorce off, wanted to try, wanted to go to coaching and counseling.

1482
01:22:13.500 --> 01:22:18.900
And so praise God because it, because I just straight up said to him, you guys have no

1483
01:22:18.900 --> 01:22:20.080
biblical grounds for divorce.

1484
01:22:20.220 --> 01:22:21.320
There's no abuse here.

1485
01:22:21.340 --> 01:22:22.220
There's no neglect here.

1486
01:22:22.240 --> 01:22:23.500
There's no infidelity here.

1487
01:22:25.740 --> 01:22:35.700
She simply thought she married the wrong person because someone at her church, first of all,

1488
01:22:35.700 --> 01:22:37.640
they say to different churches, don't do that.

1489
01:22:37.640 --> 01:22:38.480
Why would you do that?

1490
01:22:38.480 --> 01:22:39.080
Why get married?

1491
01:22:39.280 --> 01:22:40.000
Say different churches.

1492
01:22:40.080 --> 01:22:40.920
It doesn't make any sense.

1493
01:22:40.920 --> 01:22:48.000
Someone at her church planted the idea in her heart that, you know, that they weren't

1494
01:22:48.300 --> 01:22:54.720
spiritually aligned because, you know, they believe different things about something or

1495
01:22:54.720 --> 01:22:55.660
I don't even remember what it was.

1496
01:22:55.680 --> 01:22:57.080
It was something really dumb though.

1497
01:22:57.440 --> 01:22:57.860
Okay.

1498
01:22:57.860 --> 01:23:03.360
And so I say all that to say this, marriage is hard out here.

1499
01:23:03.520 --> 01:23:06.440
We've got to be prepared and we also have to stay in community.

1500
01:23:07.180 --> 01:23:09.520
You have to, strong marriages are made in strong community.

1501
01:23:09.520 --> 01:23:10.760
You got to stay together.

1502
01:23:11.000 --> 01:23:12.520
You got to be in community.

1503
01:23:12.800 --> 01:23:13.680
That's for you.

1504
01:23:13.760 --> 01:23:16.380
It's not trying to break up your marriage for God's sake.

1505
01:23:16.940 --> 01:23:18.200
You know, they're for you.

1506
01:23:18.260 --> 01:23:19.420
They're for the marriage.

1507
01:23:19.540 --> 01:23:21.680
You know, we've got to have those things in our lives.

1508
01:23:21.720 --> 01:23:23.640
So Father God, I thank you for your sons and daughters.

1509
01:23:23.700 --> 01:23:25.400
I thank you for this time coaching.

1510
01:23:26.120 --> 01:23:30.200
I pray that you continue Lord to just release wisdom over their hearts, over their minds.

1511
01:23:30.340 --> 01:23:32.460
Each and every one of them is called to marriage.

1512
01:23:32.940 --> 01:23:36.920
Each and every one of them is here because they are learning what they need to learn

1513
01:23:36.920 --> 01:23:42.920
in order to prepare for this season of their life to end and for them to step into their

1514
01:23:42.920 --> 01:23:43.580
love stories.

1515
01:23:44.040 --> 01:23:46.560
Lord, we thank you God that you are accelerating them.

1516
01:23:47.120 --> 01:23:48.780
We thank you that there's no time wasted, Lord.

1517
01:23:48.880 --> 01:23:53.380
We thank you for the year 5786 where heaven is coming to earth in an even greater way.

1518
01:23:53.800 --> 01:23:57.640
And we are feeling the tension of that, but at the same time, we're also seeing the glory

1519
01:23:57.640 --> 01:23:58.080
of it.

1520
01:23:58.160 --> 01:23:59.500
We thank you for that, God.

1521
01:23:59.580 --> 01:24:05.280
We thank you for the, we thank you for the tsunami wave of marriages that you have promised

1522
01:24:05.280 --> 01:24:05.920
this movement.

1523
01:24:06.180 --> 01:24:10.200
And in this year of grace, the fifth year of this movement, Lord, we are asking for

1524
01:24:10.200 --> 01:24:11.700
more, more, more in Jesus name.

1525
01:24:11.880 --> 01:24:12.440
Let it be so.

1526
01:24:12.760 --> 01:24:12.780
Amen.

1527
01:24:13.440 --> 01:24:14.140
All right, friends.

1528
01:24:14.500 --> 01:24:14.780
Love you.

1529
01:24:15.120 --> 01:24:15.480
Bless you.

1530
01:24:15.940 --> 01:24:17.120
See you on Supernatural Saturday.

1531
01:24:17.660 --> 01:24:18.200
Until then.

1532
01:24:18.760 --> 01:24:19.020
Ciao.