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Well hey there everybody, how we doing?

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I really hope that you are doing incredibly well.

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I know for me, I am really enjoying this change of seasons.

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It feels like the Lord's doing something really special in my family.

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We're seeing some really cool breakthroughs that I'm excited to share about with you guys

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in the coming future.

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But right now I just wanted to jump on and follow up with some Q&A.

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So a couple of weeks ago I put out in the group, just for anybody who wanted to ask

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any questions, that we could have a bit of a discussion together as parents.

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I could offer any insight I may have.

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I've spent a lot of time diving into this parenting space, many, many, many, many hours,

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many books, many courses, dreaming with the Lord, sitting with Him, getting revelation

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from the Word.

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So yeah, it's just something I'm really excited to be able to help people in that space as

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we're kind of journeying and seeing our own breakthroughs and being able to share some

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of that with others.

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So we had a couple of really good questions come through from Virginia.

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So Virginia, thank you so much for putting yourself out there.

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Very good questions.

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I really hope that I can offer something here that will inspire you.

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The nature of the questions, they're very personalized.

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So there's only so much I think I can offer in this type of a setting or this type of

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context.

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I think probably the best thing would actually be if we were to have a conversation.

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And then I could ask you some questions.

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You could bounce some stuff off me.

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If you're open to that, feel free to reach out to me.

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I'd love to have a conversation with you and we can kind of brainstorm together.

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The question, you asked a couple of questions, but the first one you asked was, how do you

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get, for you, it's your 13-year-old boy, to want to connect with God?

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You mentioned that he's experienced a lot of church.

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He's grown up kind of going to church, had a lot of experience in church.

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It's not an uncommon story, right?

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You said he's kind of maybe even starting to feel a little bit anti-God.

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So I guess my first question would be, how is his relationship with you and with his

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dad?

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Because more often than not, our kids' relationships directly reflect, our kids' relationships

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with the Lord, directly reflect their relationships with their parents.

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We as parents kind of reflect who God is in their lives.

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That's something that we talk a lot about in our parenting challenge.

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We go a lot deeper into this kind of idea that we as parents, a lot of the time we formulate

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what we believe to be true about God.

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So the closer relationship our kids have with us as parents, typically that will then inform

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how they relate to God.

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That's kind of the basic version of it.

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I talk a lot more about it in our parenting challenge.

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If you haven't gone through that, I'd encourage you to do so because I think it might be quite

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helpful.

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So breaking cycles of disconnection and how those cycles, a lot of times even subtle and

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hidden cycles, can directly impact our kids' relationships with the Lord.

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Now I don't know your story, I'm going to assume you're doing amazingly well.

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You seem like you are, so good on you for putting yourself out there.

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You also say that he's been exposed to a lot of church.

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But I would ask the question, how much has he been exposed to the power and the presence

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of the Holy Spirit?

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Because being exposed to church more often than not, quite often will actually have a

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negative impact.

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I'd say that most churches preach a powerless gospel, and especially the age that your son

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is.

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That early teen years, they want something that's real.

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Teenagers can smell something that's inauthentic from a mile away.

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So they need to experience, if the church, even if it's preaching a powerful gospel,

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they need to be demonstrating that as well.

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Because a lot of times churches, they won't preach a gospel of power, or they won't preach

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a gospel of presence.

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They'll preach a powerless gospel, but even the ones that do quite often preach a gospel

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of power and presence, they don't actually make space for that to happen.

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So in that sense, it's also quite inauthentic.

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And I think that can quite often lead a lot of people into a place of disappointment and

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bitterness towards God, because they feel like He then doesn't actually show up.

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Because that's what our churches, a lot of times, more often than not, unfortunately,

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our churches kind of demonstrate a powerless gospel.

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I would say it's really important that your son is activated into actually being able

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to have his own experience with the power and the presence of the Lord.

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And I think that's probably obvious.

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But I know for me, my story, when I really kind of, everything shifted for me.

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I was actually about 13, I was about the same age, and I went to a summer camp, and I just

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encountered the love and the presence and the power of God in a really intense and powerful

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way.

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And I just heard Him speak directly to my heart and just say, You're mine.

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You know, and it just felt like I was a completely new creation, a new person.

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And that's really when things became real to me.

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I grew up in a Christian family, but it wasn't really personal to me until I personally experienced

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the love of God and the power of God in that way.

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So you know, that's a big part of my story.

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But yeah, I don't know what it looks like for you guys and for your son, but a couple

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of examples of what we're doing with our kids, or at least our oldest, who's almost five.

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We're giving him a lot of opportunities to actually experience and try and activate him

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into experiencing the Lord for himself.

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And a lot of times that'll look like either praying for him or him praying for his sister

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if somebody's been hurt.

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I know one time he tweaked his knee, and I prayed for his knee, and his knee got healed.

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And he's like, What happened?

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And I just explained, Hey, Jesus healed your knee.

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He likes to heal people.

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And he just was like, That's so cool.

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That's awesome.

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And I said, Hey, you know, he actually likes to speak to people too.

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He loves to talk to us and just kind of activating him and hearing God's voice.

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What do you think Jesus might be saying?

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Why don't we just take a moment and listen to what we think He might be saying?

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And even just the other day, he just started cleaning up some of his toys on his own without

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being asked.

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And I said, Hey, buddy, that's so cool.

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I love that you just started cleaning up those toys without being asked.

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That was really cool.

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What made you do that?

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And he said, I don't really know what it made me do that.

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I think maybe it was Jesus whispering to me.

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Because we've actually been talking to him about how a lot of times when we hear God,

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it just sounds like He's whispering in our ear.

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And, you know, my point is, you know, ownership.

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They have to have ownership.

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It has to be a personal experience.

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And the more that we can give them those opportunities to be activated in that, the better.

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So maybe for you, that looks like sending him to a summer camp.

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Or maybe it looks like worship nights or ministry outreach trips.

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I don't know.

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But it's just some ideas to hopefully get your mind going.

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And let's see here.

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Yeah, they need personal, they have to have personal experiences.

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We can talk theology to our kids all day, but it has to be their own personal experience.

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Let's see here.

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What was the other question?

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It was really good.

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How do you motivate them to have a dream of their own?

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And how do you motivate them towards their dream or their life purpose instead of wasting

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their time?

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Right.

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So I think what I would say to that is, you know, He...

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He does have dreams of his own.

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We all do.

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We all have God-given dreams and passions and desires that are placed in us.

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And he just needs help figuring out what they are.

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And so you as a parent will know him, and you'll know him quite often better than he

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knows himself.

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So that's a journey that you guys can go on together is figuring out what is he passionate

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about and then you get to kind of shape and craft that and partner with him and with God.

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So as an example, kind of one piece of homework or an experiment that you could do might be,

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I would imagine that he has maybe some favorite YouTube channels or some favorite show or

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favorite YouTube videos that he watches.

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Or maybe it's a game that he plays.

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There will be something that he loves, that we're all naturally passionate people.

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And so what I would challenge you to do is sit with the Lord and ask the Lord to show

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you what about those things that he loves.

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What about those things, ask the Lord to show you what that means about who he is.

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And maybe there's a game that he loves to play.

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And the Lord will say, I love that, I don't want to give you too many details because

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I want the Lord to speak to you about it, but maybe it's, I love that there's this certain

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aspect of this game and it says that he's a man of courage and he loves protecting people.

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And just kind of go on this journey together of discovering what his current passions are

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and what those speak to about his destiny and let the Lord speak to you about those

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things.

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And then go on a journey with your son and just craft that together and walk through

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it together.

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And you can kind of coach him through that and it's kind of a coaching thing, right?

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Just asking questions, you could sit down and just ask him some good questions.

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Why do you think you're so passionate about fill-in-the-blank?

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What is it about fill-in-the-blank that makes you feel that way?

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And just see what happens.

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If nothing else, it'll be some good conversation pieces and some good bonding times together.

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That off the top of my head, that's what I have for now, barring kind of a conversation

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or a chat together.

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So feel free to reach out to me if you want to have a discussion.

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And maybe we can even do it live on the Facebook feed and other people can look in and learn

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and grow from that discussion.

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I don't know, just a thought.

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Feel free to reach out.

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And if nothing else as well, if you're watching this and you want to have a discussion or

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you want to ask some questions, feel free to reach out to me.

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I'd love to do more of these conversations together because we're all on a journey.

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We're all on a journey.

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We're all learning.

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We're all growing.

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And the more we can help each other, the better.

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So yeah, Virginia, I hope that helps.

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I really appreciate you reaching out.

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And yeah, feel free to get in touch if you want to go deeper together.

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But bless you.

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And also I just want to say, don't feel any mom guilt.

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We don't need guilt.

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It's not going to help you.

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It doesn't serve you.

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The fact that you're asking questions automatically sets you apart from the vast, vast majority

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of parents out there.

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So pat yourself on the back.

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There's a quote that I really love from a person named Dr. Becky.

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She has a podcast.

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She's incredible.

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If you haven't heard of her, feel free to check her out.

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And she says, we're all just making the best decisions that we can based on the information

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that we have available at the time.

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So you're doing the best that you can.

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And from what I can see, it looks like you're doing a really good job.

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So well done.

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Also, I'm going to drop a link to another podcast that I know of that might help speak

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to you a little bit along the kind of motivation, motivating their dreams.

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So I'm going to drop that in the comments of this video.

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Check that one out.

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That's from a guy named Kirk Martin.

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He's amazing.

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He's got a podcast called The Calm Parenting Podcast.

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Really good.

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But yeah, anyway, I hope this helps.

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You're amazing. Everyone watching, you're amazing. And thanks for sticking with us

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to the end of this video. And yeah, onward and upward. Amazing things ahead.

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Alright, thanks guys. Bless you.