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hello ladies so I just wanted to get on and do a journey share just about how

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I've been feeling spiritually so I have just felt a little stagnant I don't know

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my relationship with God you know some of the things that have happened in the

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last two weeks or so just been so like monumental to me so personal and just

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profound and like that I want to ensure that I don't lose that closeness that I

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felt with God and he's just been so sweet in the experiences that I've had

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with him and I just don't want it to be a one-and-done thing I wanted to be like

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a regular part of our relationship and I don't know if it's resistance in that

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I'm just like I'm feeling I'm at the place in my walk where it's like I can't

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go back like I refuse to go back just to like the status quo and I just want to

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go deeper and I feel like there's so much more that he has for for me as his

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kid for us as his children that just the status quo is just not enough like

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I just feel like there's an ocean of him to discover and I just had a few drops

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in a cup you know and I want to just know him better and experience him

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regularly and because I kind of just felt stagnant in the things that kind of

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worked for me before just you know like just journaling out my raw emotions like

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he just really came through and I like I as I continue to do that I just don't

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feel and I know it's feeling based but it's like I haven't experienced him in

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the same way and I'm happy though because it's like I don't feel like it's

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a crisis 9-1-1 emergency type of thing it's real things that I'm bringing to

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him like you know triggers or relational types of things with you know

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oh like you know maybe I offended someone and I need to apologize or you

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know just feeling insecure in something with another relationship with the

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relationship or my marriage and he a guy was actually really good with that

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because I just sat what I journaled about it I sat with it even though those

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feelings and emotions were still there and didn't express it and just kind of

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waited for the emotions to kind of lift and not feel so urgent and then I you

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know brought it brought it to my spouse and he was really great in receiving

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that and God I think he definitely gave me the words to say in the delivery

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method for that so that's great and that's something Ashley had told us in

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one of our rest groups that was really good about just making sure that we have

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we were make sure we're seated in our identity first and then going to that

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other person and God giving us direction on how to do that so that is a praise

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point that I see God has done that for me once again and so I think there's two

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other issues with with relational types of things with different people that I

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need to address that I'm like okay I'll talk to God about it but I don't quite

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have the direction about exactly what to say or maybe exactly how to do it so I

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guess in some ways maybe it's like before it just felt like instantaneous

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like he would just God would just fix things or like show up or you know in

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that kind of way where I was like oh my gosh you were so there you heard my

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and so now I don't know maybe he's just kind of like walking me through and

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discipling me in that where it's like okay I built up your faith now I'm gonna

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show you you know how to do it and I don't have to make it like this you know

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this thing miraculous thing or whatever where it felt that way anyway to me

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because I'm like how did you know you changed it so quickly so anyway but that

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is I guess a little rabbit trail but the main thing is like I just want to

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ensure that I my experiences with God are just a part of my regular walk with

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him and so I don't know how to go about that per se so that's just something

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that I'm struggling with a little bit and feeling a little anxious about so

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anyway thanks for listening and I will see you guys soon