WEBVTT

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How's it going, going great, going great, good day, good, are you back.

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No, I'm still in Baton Rouge, I fly out tomorrow, late, late.

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Okay, okay, oh wow.

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Yeah, well I hope that goes good.

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Does your husband go with you or does he still have stuff to do?

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He still has stuff to do, the school round, and like I started volunteering, doing like reading volunteering, so like 30 minutes, helping kids learn how to read at a local school.

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So I was like okay well I mean I know I needed to go back to that commitment, but I have a lot of festivities birthday festivities this weekend as well, like my dad and my nephew.

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I was gonna have to come back.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Yeah, my, my dad and my sister have their birthdays next week so I guess it's just the time for birthdays.

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Large birthdays, yes.

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Birthdays what month were you born.

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I'm August, the last day of August, August 31.

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Barely squeezed it in.

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How about you.

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Mid May.

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So yeah, yeah, so I am. Yeah, I, I've always liked the fact that I was born in May, it just always felt like lots of flowers and everything's new green and so anyway I was like, I was like that.

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My, my parents were told by God when they were praying about me they were told May, so they thought that they were supposed to start trying in May.

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And no God meant that I was gonna be born in May.

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I came about nine months faster than they thought we were going to start trying.

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That's.

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Yeah, yeah.

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So how's it been while you've been there.

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It's been really good.

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I'm like, like it's, it's going it's gel and even like when we talk about in our transformation session like I've seen improvement in that area. And so yeah, so I'm like, I'm really thankful.

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Yeah. Good. That's super.

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Well, I had the had the last rest group with the international group today.

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This afternoon.

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And so that was fun.

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Enjoy getting together with them. And so I'll be uploading that recording, trying to remember some of the stuff that we talked about

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about.

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Well, some of it was just, I was mentioning is that you know it's just kind of like a theme recently just talking to everyone about just accepting themselves where it is that they are and it doesn't mean that you just didn't mean except, except being there means

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that you accept yourself, instead of rejecting yourself. While you're feeling the way that you're feeling.

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And just like okay well I'm mad, or I'm, I'm afraid or I'm whatever so we talked a bit about that because it came up in response to some of the stuff that they were talking about.

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I talked about, you know, desires for like well Lord what is it that I'm going to do, what is it I'm going to do in business, and, and then how to kind of navigate that time, and one of the things that I encourage the men is specifically Annette because she was the one

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that was bringing, bringing it up specifically. And that was just to just allow oneself to just to, to accept the, what feels like discontent to, to just accept that, that what may be going on is not necessarily discontent that we tend to like feel that we have

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but rather and feel like oh I shouldn't feel like this is so different.

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You know, this isn't Godly or whatever.

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To understand that the discontent can be kind of like the process of having a baby where your body is changing so much and it feels like everything's wrong you know there's all the stretching and then there's all of the pain and then there's all the pressure and you're

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on you know, you know, I know what it feels like to be me and feel like.

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woman and this is not it, you know, this does not feel, feel, feel like the normal

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thing.

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And then afterwards you don't have it and you have the baby.

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So, but it's like the, the middle part, you know, it just feels like, okay, it

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feels like everything is going wrong.

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And, and to, and that they say that the easiest, smoothest way to transition

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through all of that is to just, is to just relax into it and to just allow your

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body to take over and to do what it needs to do.

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So I suggested, you know, kind of think navigating the transition of the unknown

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in the same way as, and to know that the disc can, what we're labeling so often

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as discontent is, um, is not always, uh, is not always our resistance to and

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rebellion against something that God is doing or our circumstances or whatever.

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Sometimes it's just simply us being aware, like our spirit being aware that

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we were meant for more, that we were meant to exfil more, we were meant to

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expand into more, there's something else, or there's something it's like

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anticipating that something is coming, but it's not here yet.

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And so you're feeling that disconnect.

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They, they, for instance, say that a lot about people that, um, can see

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that, uh, that are, um, uh, very prophetic, you know, because they, they

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struggle with the fact that they're in a particular existence and they see

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particular things happening in time.

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And yet it's like their spirit is aware of, of something that God

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intends for this to change into.

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And to hold both at the same time, to hold what is with what, um, either

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with what is possible or with what will be in the future is very challenging.

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And it's something that God actually entrusts people that have a prophetic

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gift with is to be able to hold both at the same time.

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And so that is, is a bit of a struggle in the middle of like unknowns of like,

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okay, Lord, I am, I'm feeling, you know, I'm wanting to start a business or I'm

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wanting to move into X, Y, and Z, but I'm not there yet and I don't even know

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what it is, or maybe I do know what it is, but no matter what I'm doing, it's

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just not happening yet, or Lord, why isn't it now, why is it always later?

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Or whatever it is that we're questioning.

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It's that in between time just feels like a lot of pressure, feels like a lot of

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pain, feels a lot, you know, a lot of, um, uh, just a lot of stretching of

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boundaries and just, and, and, and for us to just consider that.

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So I was suggesting that it will go through faster and more, more smoothly,

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and that you'll hear God more clearly.

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If you just relax and let go and understand, no, this means that

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God is answering my heart's cry.

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The fact that there is this pressure, the fact that there's this stretching

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fact that there is this pain, because this is the, this is the process that

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everything in me has to go through to make room for the thing that I've asked

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God for.

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So this is like, as opposed to us being condemning of ourselves or being

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accusatory of the Lord of like, it shouldn't be like this, it shouldn't feel

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like this.

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Well, no, this isn't where you're going to stay.

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It's not where you're going to end up.

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This is the transition from what was, which couldn't hold the new thing

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to actually birthing the new thing.

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So anyway, um, but we were talking about stuff like that.

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That's really good.

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I feel like that's so timely to like where I am.

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And I feel like I definitely have a little bit more peace and like rest about

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maybe, I don't know the process.

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I was so like, like, you know, unhealthily urgent before about like, okay.

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It needs to manifest.

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But I think you said something on one.

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Oh, I think it was our last one.

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You said, yeah, I know that I wanted or was going to travel, but it was like,

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God kind of put something in me that it was the time and confirmed it with like

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my mom or your parents or something that it was like the time for it to start.

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And so that's the thing I was like, Hmm, that's interesting.

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Like, I think that's like a key for me because it's like, I feel like I'm in

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this season of waiting.

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I've been in this season of waiting and I'm trying to make it, make it happen.

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Like, you know, my own self, you know?

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And so instead of just being like, Lord, you know, the perfect timing, I'm just

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going to just rest in you, you know, focus on you.

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And when it's time, you'll open those doors that need to be open.

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Like, instead of like, instead of being mad because you're like, it didn't happen

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yet, you know, like, so I don't, I felt like, okay, like I can, and I'm like,

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Lord, if it's just not right now, you'll show.

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me the time. So I think what you what you just said, and what

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Annette was going through, because I remember her

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mentioning that before in a journey share, like, I was like,

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Oh my god, yeah, like, I got so get that. So I appreciate you

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saying what you just said right now, because I feel like that's

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even an answer to prayer. Oh, good. And like, really, like

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pondering that type of thing as well. So I'll go back and

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listen to her listen to that one as well. Okay, good.

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Good. That's helpful. Yeah, super helpful. Yeah. Yeah. And

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because that really will help settle everything in you down.

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And if you're going through like the struggle emotionally, you

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know, that I've gone in that I've been in, where you're just

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like, you know, it, you haven't gotten to the new thing, and you

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don't know what he what it even is. And it's like, you just know

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that where it is, isn't it? And where you are, isn't it? And,

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and so there's this frustration. And you're like, Lord, I was

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meant for more, or I don't, I don't feel like this is what

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it's supposed to be. And everybody keeps telling me that

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this is all I should expect, or that this is the answer to my

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question. And I'm like, Lord, I don't know why. But this isn't

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it. And I feel that you have a different answer. But I don't

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know what that is, either. You know, it's like, because I

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haven't seen it. I just know that whatever it is that I have

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seen is not what I'm supposed to step into. You know, case in

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point, when I was going through in order to that, what I was

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going through in the in the process of finally getting to

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starting the rest intensive is there was always something in me

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that knew that whatever it was I was doing, it wasn't it. And

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then people would talk about how they were doing business. And I

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was trying to figure and I would be in business. And I'm going,

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No, no, God means for it to be very different. But I didn't

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know how. I didn't know how I was supposed to look if it

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wasn't supposed to look like this. But in the spirit, I'm

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like, No, this does not feel right. This is all I've ever

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seen. This is all anything that anybody that I've ever known,

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even all the Christians, this is how they do it. In fact, this is

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how they do it in the biblical sense. This is how they do it in

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the Christian sense. And even those things I'm sensing in the

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spirit are not quite what I am feeling in my in my spirit is

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possible. And it's what God means, you know, is I would just

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frustrated because I'm just like, Lord, can I just never be

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satisfied? Can I am I just blind? Do I think that I just

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know better than everybody else and everybody else's solutions

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just aren't good enough. I'm just like, Lord, is there some

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and I would just move into the self condemning place. And what

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ended up happening is because I just I just followed my spirit

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just follow what it felt like the Lord was telling me. And I

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was like, Okay, well, then how would that look? And okay, well,

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let's try this. And let's see if this matches and I would just

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try new things. And so what ended up happening is I

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basically created something that I'd never seen. Now technically,

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you can look at it and you can say, Oh, yeah, mentorship

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programs exist. And yeah, they do. They do, you know, one on

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one times coaching times with people. And yeah, they do. They

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do online teachings that they post and they whatever, but I

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didn't really, um, I got some general ideas of some idea, some

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things I could do. But the overall idea of what it is that

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I formed, I just formed without just just because it just felt

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right. Not because I was following a specific program

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where the coaches were saying, this is how you do what you're

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wanting to do. This is the structure that we've noticed

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works. So adopt this structure. I didn't I just kind of created

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my own little thing based off of what it what fell in my spirit

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was right. And then I got it. And I'm like, Oh, my word, this

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is it. But though I will tell you that as, as, um, as some of

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my friends, you know, have heard me say many, many, many times is

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you know, I'm always I'm always trying to the rest intensive

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almost never looks the same from one intensive to the next. And

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just because I'm always changing some aspect of it, some

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of the structure, whatever, because I'm always trying to

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improve on its effectiveness, to help people understand to help

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people get it faster to help it, like really have power in their

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lives and whatever, and help them receive what it is that

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they need and whatever. So even that structure is always kind of

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changing. But I feel like I'm doing it a bit more from the

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father heart that I've always knew was there, that I could

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never see an example of. But anyway, my point is to say all

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that to encourage you, if you say that any of this is

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resonating, that just just follow just follow your spirit

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and don't get concerned, or frustrated and therefore be in

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resistance against your process, because just know that those are

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the things in you all the pressure, all of the stretching,

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all the whatever are the things in you that are needing to shift

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to make the

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boom. So all of that has to move. It has to be an

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unalignment because it's going in through a process of getting

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into alignment. So until it's in alignment, it's an

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unalignment, but it's shifting, you know. So anyway, I just

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encourage you to just accept the fact that, okay, you know, I'm

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just in process. And this is what in process of God answering

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my prayer feels like. This is it. I'm doing it. He's

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answering. You just don't know what the answer is going to

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look like. But you know, God is, you know, your father is a good

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father that is answering your prayer that is answering your

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heart's cry. You know, no question, his promise, his

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guarantee. You just don't know what the answer is. You don't

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know what the answer to your real heart's cry truly is. And

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he does. Anyway, so just know and be comforted by the fact

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that it's not going wrong. It's going right. And then you can

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kind of relax into the pressure, into the pain, into the

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stretching and just know, oh, this is it. And as opposed to

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the more pain that we get, simply by the fact that we're

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resisting it, that creates greater pain, that makes

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everything harder. And so if you just relax into it and allow

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all of this discombobulation to happen, then know, okay, it's

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working. I am it, I am where I had asked God to be, where he's

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making a way and he's causing it to happen. And he's moving

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everything in me and in my circumstances to allow that

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thing to be burgeoned to come forth. So anyway, for what I'm

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referring to that is it helps me. I mean, like literally my my

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emotions, you know, like, for instance, when I talk about like

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when I accept myself, and like, okay, well, I'm just mad right

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now or whatever, I'll drop from an intensity of a 10 to a one,

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the same thing with this, if I'm like, Oh, my word, Lord, you

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know, why can't I figure this out? Or why can't I find a

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solution to this or whatever? Or like, okay, actually, this

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unknown, this what I call what I label as chaos, or whatever, is

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actually me, it actually means it's working. I, I'm in it. I'm

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there, I'm doing the thing. And so it's like, Oh, okay, so this

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is all this is, this is it. This is what I've asked for. This is

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the process. And so always remember that this is something

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that someone told me and that that just absolutely rocked my

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world. I did not understand it when they said it and the Lord

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is even still teaching me more what it means. But things are

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birthed when you move through chaos in rest. So chaos has to

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exist. And in order for something to be birthed,

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something is birthed through chaos, but only when you move

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through the chaos and rest, if you move through chaos and chaos,

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it can't be birthed, or it's birthed as a very mutated,

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corrupted form. And it's not beautiful and peaceful, and it's

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spiritually healthy. But if you moved, and it's also, it's not

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the spirit. So therefore, it's not eternal. So therefore, it's

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going to burn as wood, hay and stubble. But if you move through

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chaos in rest, then that which is of spirit can now be born

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into the earth. You know, and that's how your how your

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business can be born. That's how can our relationship can be

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born. That's how, how conflict and relationship can be resolved

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is when you're moving through chaos in the spirit of rest.

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That's the channel, so to speak. That's the way through which the

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spirit can enter the earth and transform it. So just FYI, chaos

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must be an existence. It doesn't mean something's wrong. It has

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to be there. And you're meant to move through it and rest in

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order for something to be birthed. So don't think it's

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bad.

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So anyway,

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that's so good, because I've been like, just sometimes I just

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like, well, I just expect it to be like, I don't want the chaos

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to be there. But knowing that that's a part of the norm, but

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like walking in it and rest is the key to it being birthed is

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like, thank you. And I just I got reminded me to was like,

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during I guess it was part it was during the pandemic. My boss

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was out on maternity leave, Rita knows the story. And then my

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co AP, she was on maternity leave too. And I was running the

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school all by myself. And it was like, look, granny, I work long

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hours and all of that. But it was just like smooth. It was

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just like, that's right. It was just I was like, Oh my god. And

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I mean, I was like, ready for them to come back. Because like,

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I was like, it was it was, it was tiring, but it wasn't like,

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God will wake me up at a certain amount. He will wake me up in

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just enough time for me to do everything I

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needed to do like from three to six or whatever in order to get

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to work to go do a full day's work. But it was just like it

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was smooth. You know what I mean? Like, and then someone

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that I really respected one of the coaches she was like, after

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she was like, you did it. And she just was like, I will work

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for you like someone like my boss. It's like we all was like

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she's Bob, you know what I mean? Yes. It is so God like to be

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able to like there was such a testimony to his goodness, you

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know, um, so I it just was like, I'm like, he's reminding

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me like, you've been through that before. Yeah. So like,

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thank you. That's really good. So now I can like put those

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together.

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Good. Yeah, that's great. So I just wanted to be encouraged

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that things are going that where it is that you are and how hard

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it is hard. It's feeling how hard it is feeling is that as

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you walking through is walking towards the thing that you're

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wanting. Now, again, what that looks like, it's up to the Lord,

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you know, God that God's responsible for the outcome, but

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that that it's not like, Oh, my word, it feels uncomfortable.

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Therefore, it must be wrong. Therefore, I must have gotten

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off track somewhere. Therefore, I might not be hearing God, you

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know, we go to all of these dark places. And, and so God's just

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like, No, just look for me. Just look for me. Remember, he

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doesn't say find me. He said, seek me in men, he will reveal

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himself. Remember, he reveals himself, we can't, we can't find

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him outside of his will. He is the one who reveals but he

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reveals as a response to us seeking. So you're not

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responsible for finding him. You're responsible for seeking

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him and he in response will reveal. So pressures off. You

305
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just do you just go through this process and don't think

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that Oh, my word, I haven't gotten it yet. I'm probably

307
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missing him somewhere. Just keep your heart and your spirit open

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like, okay, Lord, you know, I trust that you're going to show

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me because Lord, you reveal things. You say it, you know,

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that it's that it's for me to seek out. And for me to like,

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for me to, what does it say to, I don't know to, I can't

312
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remember the Bible verse right now. But anyway, it's a bit to

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that it's a good thing to be to be seeking and to be discovering

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and to be looking for. But it's God, he will reveal himself not

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it's not your it's not your responsibility to find him. Just

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just be responsible, look for him, he'll reveal himself, it's

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all okay. And just know that the fact that this feels

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uncomfortable, unknown, chaotic, uncertain is the thing. That's

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where this will all be birthed from. You just can't see it. So

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you have to have faith that while stuff is going on that

321
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you're like, I don't understand to death fate that no, this is

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God moving. I just don't. I just can't see where it's going. But

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just keep at it. You know, keep seeking him and just keep, you

324
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know, whatever, just keep your heart open. And they eat. And

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another thing to that makes it easier to hear the Lord is to

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release, you know, we keep talking about releasing things

327
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and letting go, whatever, is to release a specific answer from

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the Lord and to emotionally release him from the obligation

329
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of giving you a specific answer. Like, okay, God, you can get you

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can have me do whatever it is you want me to do. You can cause

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the outcome to be whatever it is, whether you want me to go

332
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back to being a teacher and assistant principal, or if you

333
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want me to go, or if you want me to do a brand new industry

334
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altogether, or if you want me to do like, you know, something

335
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from home and have my own business or have my own ministry

336
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or do whatever, whatever it is, Lord, I finally emotionally

337
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release you have the obligation of, of it being a specific

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answer. You know, you because saying, God, I'll let you do

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whatever isn't the same thing. Because that's like, no, I'm

340
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going to hold on to this and God, you can rip it from my

341
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hands if you want to. That's what I'm allowing. You know,

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instead of saying, God, you can't we're like, well, okay,

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no, God, you can take it from me if you want. That's my

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permission. And God's like, No, I'm not going to take it. You

345
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have to surrender it, you have to pick it up, put it down, give

346
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it to me, let go and walk away. He said that is surrender.

347
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That's what Abraham did. He brought it to me and let it go.

348
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So that I won't come get it. So we have a different idea

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under, we haven't understood that that's what's true

350
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surrender is we keep saying a lot of surrenders. I've allowed

351
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God, you know, I told God, you can have it. And so and so, you

352
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know, this

353
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It's just kind of, it's still the way it is,

354
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and God hasn't changed anything,

355
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but I told him he could if he wanted.

356
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And God's like, no, I'm not going to rip it from you.

357
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I'm not going to take it from you.

358
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I need you, I'm asking you to entrust me

359
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by with action on your faith that I'm good

360
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by actually leaving it with me,

361
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as opposed to God, you can take it.

362
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So anyway, just FYI,

363
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that will also help you hear God more clearly about,

364
00:25:34.080 --> 00:25:36.000
Lord, what direction should I take?

365
00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:41.000
If you emotionally release, whatever, release the answer,

366
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which is hard, because we're like,

367
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I know that I have these desires

368
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and I'm holding before the Lord or whatever.

369
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You can still want something

370
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without emotionally obligating God to it.

371
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In other words, emotionally accusing him of not doing it

372
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and getting mad at him or thinking he's not good

373
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if he gives you a different answer.

374
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That's the issue.

375
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It's emotionally holding God hostage

376
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to giving you what you want.

377
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That is what we have to emotionally let go of.

378
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We have to emotionally release God from the outcome.

379
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So anyway, okay, well, sorry, everybody.

380
00:26:17.560 --> 00:26:18.720
I know it's rest period time,

381
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but Tammy and I were the only ones off a little bit.

382
00:26:20.720 --> 00:26:22.040
So we just started talking.

383
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And I needed to wrap it up.

384
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So to make sure we fully talked about the subject,

385
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y'all know me, I'm nothing if not thorough.

386
00:26:30.640 --> 00:26:33.400
So full context.

387
00:26:33.400 --> 00:26:36.080
Okay, so I will jump off and let y'all chat

388
00:26:36.080 --> 00:26:39.440
and I'll be back in a bit.

389
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:40.520
Thank you, thank you, thank you.

390
00:26:40.520 --> 00:26:41.800
Appreciate that.

391
00:26:41.800 --> 00:26:42.640
You're welcome.

392
00:26:47.080 --> 00:26:47.920
Hey.

393
00:26:47.920 --> 00:26:48.760
Hello.

394
00:26:49.840 --> 00:26:50.840
Hi, Tammy.

395
00:26:50.840 --> 00:26:52.120
Hi, Rita.

396
00:26:52.120 --> 00:26:53.160
How y'all doing?

397
00:26:54.160 --> 00:26:56.560
Good, a little tired.

398
00:26:56.560 --> 00:26:58.160
A little tired, yeah.

399
00:26:58.160 --> 00:27:00.520
Have you been getting good rest, Karen?

400
00:27:00.520 --> 00:27:04.760
Not so good rest at night.

401
00:27:04.760 --> 00:27:08.280
So keep being in agreement with me for that.

402
00:27:08.280 --> 00:27:13.280
However, because of the stuff we're doing

403
00:27:14.480 --> 00:27:19.480
and I feel like actually my back is doing better.

404
00:27:19.880 --> 00:27:21.760
I've had kind of a sciatic issue

405
00:27:21.760 --> 00:27:24.360
for the last several weeks, weeks,

406
00:27:24.360 --> 00:27:26.160
maybe the whole six weeks we've been meeting

407
00:27:26.160 --> 00:27:28.080
and it's feeling better.

408
00:27:28.960 --> 00:27:33.400
I got a massage today and there wasn't a lot,

409
00:27:33.400 --> 00:27:37.000
a little bit of stuff going on, but also my adrenals,

410
00:27:38.480 --> 00:27:42.200
which I think have been kind of down for a while,

411
00:27:42.200 --> 00:27:44.920
probably due to my not sleeping real well.

412
00:27:44.920 --> 00:27:49.120
And I worked nights for like 10 years,

413
00:27:49.120 --> 00:27:50.320
way back in the 80s.

414
00:27:50.320 --> 00:27:53.760
So I developed a habit.

415
00:27:53.760 --> 00:27:55.120
We won't call it bad right now

416
00:27:55.120 --> 00:27:59.280
because we'll just call it a habit of staying up late.

417
00:27:59.280 --> 00:28:02.720
So I just started about a year ago

418
00:28:02.720 --> 00:28:04.000
wanting to change that

419
00:28:04.000 --> 00:28:07.400
and working with a naturopathic doctor.

420
00:28:07.400 --> 00:28:10.080
So I'm trying to just like Ashley said,

421
00:28:10.080 --> 00:28:13.120
just be easy on myself and not get frustrated.

422
00:28:13.120 --> 00:28:15.120
And if I wake up, it's okay.

423
00:28:15.120 --> 00:28:18.520
And so even the last few nights,

424
00:28:18.520 --> 00:28:19.920
maybe last night was a tad better,

425
00:28:20.520 --> 00:28:21.360
but I was waking up a lot,

426
00:28:21.360 --> 00:28:24.320
but I'm trying to just stay, okay, God.

427
00:28:24.320 --> 00:28:25.560
You know, I just kind of pray

428
00:28:25.560 --> 00:28:28.440
and sometimes pray in the spirit.

429
00:28:28.440 --> 00:28:32.120
And sometimes I listened to a couple of ministers

430
00:28:32.120 --> 00:28:34.960
that have real relaxing voices that put me back to sleep.

431
00:28:37.440 --> 00:28:39.680
But my adrenals were back today.

432
00:28:39.680 --> 00:28:41.480
My massage therapist checked them

433
00:28:41.480 --> 00:28:44.000
because they'd been down for several weeks.

434
00:28:44.000 --> 00:28:48.360
They were back to being okay today and thyroid.

435
00:28:49.160 --> 00:28:52.160
So that made me feel good in that when they're,

436
00:28:52.160 --> 00:28:56.760
you know, you just feel a little more like yourself

437
00:28:56.760 --> 00:29:01.760
and yeah, and real estate's been a little busier,

438
00:29:01.840 --> 00:29:04.320
but it's been okay.

439
00:29:04.320 --> 00:29:06.600
I finally had two closings last week

440
00:29:06.600 --> 00:29:09.880
that seemed like they took forever, but yay.

441
00:29:11.680 --> 00:29:13.480
Actually, these were my first closings of the year,

442
00:29:13.480 --> 00:29:14.680
you guys.

443
00:29:14.680 --> 00:29:17.840
My January closings got put off till the end of March.

444
00:29:18.440 --> 00:29:20.400
And so at least they're coming,

445
00:29:20.400 --> 00:29:24.240
but I had no closings for January or February.

446
00:29:24.240 --> 00:29:29.240
So I had two last week and I got a blessing today.

447
00:29:31.080 --> 00:29:33.200
An old friend of mine is going to,

448
00:29:33.200 --> 00:29:36.880
should all work out, buy a property to flip.

449
00:29:36.880 --> 00:29:39.800
And he just called me about a week ago or so.

450
00:29:39.800 --> 00:29:44.800
And I found him a pretty high end, kind of a higher end flip

451
00:29:45.000 --> 00:29:47.000
and it's cash and it's closing in one week.

452
00:29:47.000 --> 00:29:49.200
So now I have another closing in one week.

453
00:29:49.200 --> 00:29:50.400
We're awesome.

454
00:29:52.280 --> 00:29:56.760
Yeah, I just got that all together today.

455
00:29:56.760 --> 00:29:59.160
And the dentist has been a,

456
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:01.600
This has been a tough thing for me.

457
00:30:01.600 --> 00:30:03.940
I just had some dental pain when I was young,

458
00:30:03.940 --> 00:30:05.400
and I've been trying to work through that.

459
00:30:05.400 --> 00:30:08.160
And I didn't go to the dentist for two years

460
00:30:08.160 --> 00:30:12.220
because I was so, I felt like I had so much stress

461
00:30:12.220 --> 00:30:15.060
from me and the marriage and all kinds,

462
00:30:15.060 --> 00:30:16.960
I just couldn't handle one more thing.

463
00:30:16.960 --> 00:30:19.480
So I finally went in the fall,

464
00:30:19.480 --> 00:30:20.920
and then he said I needed a crown.

465
00:30:20.920 --> 00:30:23.760
And I was like, oh my God, a crown, that takes time.

466
00:30:23.760 --> 00:30:27.060
And so my girlfriend actually went and prayed

467
00:30:27.100 --> 00:30:30.260
in the spirit with me the whole time I got a crown.

468
00:30:30.260 --> 00:30:32.020
Oh, that's great.

469
00:30:32.020 --> 00:30:35.780
And yeah, and then I took some natural herbs

470
00:30:35.780 --> 00:30:39.380
that helped a little, but I lived, I made it through it.

471
00:30:39.380 --> 00:30:41.420
And I had to go back today

472
00:30:41.420 --> 00:30:44.820
because I had a little bit of a sensitivity on that crown,

473
00:30:44.820 --> 00:30:46.840
but I think it's, he just ground,

474
00:30:46.840 --> 00:30:49.640
so I went back today and he ground it down a little bit.

475
00:30:50.720 --> 00:30:51.960
But I mean, yeah, I don't know why,

476
00:30:51.960 --> 00:30:54.540
but it's just been a process getting through this

477
00:30:54.540 --> 00:30:57.420
dental stuff and the anxiousness.

478
00:30:57.420 --> 00:31:02.420
And so part of the process, I guess,

479
00:31:02.460 --> 00:31:05.580
but overall, yeah, it was really good news

480
00:31:05.580 --> 00:31:08.460
that my adrenals were better today

481
00:31:08.460 --> 00:31:10.500
and that my back felt better.

482
00:31:10.500 --> 00:31:13.260
So that just felt like some progress, you know?

483
00:31:15.300 --> 00:31:18.120
And Ken and I have been spending some time together,

484
00:31:18.120 --> 00:31:21.840
but I had my session with Ashley yesterday

485
00:31:21.840 --> 00:31:23.540
and it went really well.

486
00:31:23.540 --> 00:31:25.700
And she had some advice about that

487
00:31:25.700 --> 00:31:29.320
and that was phenomenal, you know?

488
00:31:31.220 --> 00:31:32.700
And then the stuff that you all just,

489
00:31:32.700 --> 00:31:34.860
she just talked about Tammy was wonderful.

490
00:31:34.860 --> 00:31:38.020
It was really helpful, I think, to all of us, I'm sure.

491
00:31:38.020 --> 00:31:40.300
You know, we get to lead these outcomes up to God.

492
00:31:40.300 --> 00:31:43.620
And so I think I was starting to be more relaxed with Ken,

493
00:31:43.620 --> 00:31:48.260
just, you know, I can't control anything, right?

494
00:31:48.260 --> 00:31:52.140
And so,

495
00:31:53.580 --> 00:31:57.420
so yeah, you know, it just, it's a,

496
00:31:57.420 --> 00:31:59.020
this has been really good.

497
00:31:59.020 --> 00:32:00.140
This has been really good.

498
00:32:00.140 --> 00:32:03.820
And then there's a conference this weekend at Cedar Creek.

499
00:32:03.820 --> 00:32:07.240
I don't know if you heard, but there's four speakers,

500
00:32:07.240 --> 00:32:10.140
but the guy coming, the main speaker,

501
00:32:10.140 --> 00:32:11.500
Ashley just told me yesterday,

502
00:32:11.500 --> 00:32:13.620
he's the man that married Ashley.

503
00:32:15.620 --> 00:32:19.820
He's coming to Cedar Creek and Ashley wanted to come,

504
00:32:19.820 --> 00:32:21.540
but she had something else going on this weekend,

505
00:32:21.540 --> 00:32:23.700
but she's going to see him somewhere else, I think,

506
00:32:23.700 --> 00:32:26.460
because he's from out of the, he's from England, I think.

507
00:32:26.460 --> 00:32:30.900
So I get a little, I mean, I drive back and forth

508
00:32:30.900 --> 00:32:33.380
because it's only 40 minutes from my house.

509
00:32:33.380 --> 00:32:35.460
My friends own, it's a beautiful resort.

510
00:32:35.460 --> 00:32:38.380
It's 200 acres with a big old lake

511
00:32:38.380 --> 00:32:40.900
and there's so many angels there and these cabins

512
00:32:40.900 --> 00:32:42.620
and that's where I got married.

513
00:32:43.460 --> 00:32:46.180
And I've known the owner since they bought the,

514
00:32:46.180 --> 00:32:47.060
before they bought it,

515
00:32:47.060 --> 00:32:49.220
but it's just easier for me to drive home

516
00:32:49.220 --> 00:32:51.500
and sleep in my own bed.

517
00:32:51.500 --> 00:32:56.500
So, but it'll be, it's Thursday night,

518
00:32:56.700 --> 00:32:59.340
Friday, Saturday, and Sunday morning.

519
00:32:59.340 --> 00:33:01.100
So it'll be a little break.

520
00:33:01.100 --> 00:33:04.940
And we had a lot of conferences out there

521
00:33:04.940 --> 00:33:06.180
the last five, six years.

522
00:33:06.180 --> 00:33:08.780
Oh my gosh, they've brought so many awesome people.

523
00:33:08.780 --> 00:33:11.900
This is where I got introduced to so many different things

524
00:33:11.900 --> 00:33:15.580
to, I don't know if y'all ever heard of Nancy Cohen.

525
00:33:15.580 --> 00:33:17.140
She's been out here like 10 times,

526
00:33:17.140 --> 00:33:20.540
but so many different things and that has,

527
00:33:20.540 --> 00:33:22.740
and my mentors, I met my mentors there

528
00:33:22.740 --> 00:33:25.900
and that's where Ashley, I met Ashley.

529
00:33:25.900 --> 00:33:27.260
That's where Ashley taught this conference,

530
00:33:27.260 --> 00:33:28.460
was it Cedar Creek?

531
00:33:28.460 --> 00:33:30.140
Oh, yeah.

532
00:33:30.140 --> 00:33:31.900
So that's where I met her two years ago.

533
00:33:31.900 --> 00:33:35.140
And so anyway, looking forward to that,

534
00:33:35.140 --> 00:33:37.140
even though it'll be a little,

535
00:33:37.140 --> 00:33:42.140
you know, it's time driving and time there and everything.

536
00:33:42.780 --> 00:33:46.300
And, but, and with Ken, I just told him about it

537
00:33:46.300 --> 00:33:48.980
and I'm like, you know, if you want to,

538
00:33:48.980 --> 00:33:50.300
if you want to come or if you want to come

539
00:33:50.300 --> 00:33:52.900
for a meeting or a day, it's only like $25,

540
00:33:52.900 --> 00:33:55.620
but it's like, you know what?

541
00:33:55.620 --> 00:33:58.860
At this point, I don't even really care if he comes.

542
00:34:00.340 --> 00:34:01.540
Isn't that good?

543
00:34:01.540 --> 00:34:02.380
Yeah.

544
00:34:04.220 --> 00:34:08.500
I don't even, you know, I don't even care.

545
00:34:08.500 --> 00:34:10.739
And to tell you the truth, yeah, you know,

546
00:34:10.739 --> 00:34:12.820
and then next weekend we actually have another conference,

547
00:34:12.820 --> 00:34:15.420
two in a row, who's a local guy, friend of mine,

548
00:34:15.420 --> 00:34:17.500
and they call him the psalmist.

549
00:34:17.500 --> 00:34:19.100
And he was there in the fall.

550
00:34:19.100 --> 00:34:21.100
And we just said that it was like family.

551
00:34:21.100 --> 00:34:24.780
We set up couches and he worships and he teaches.

552
00:34:24.780 --> 00:34:27.860
And then we just sit around and talk about it like a family.

553
00:34:27.860 --> 00:34:29.100
We even played games.

554
00:34:29.100 --> 00:34:31.060
And I mean, it was like, it's,

555
00:34:31.060 --> 00:34:32.060
so we're going to have another one.

556
00:34:32.060 --> 00:34:34.540
So I have two weekends in a row of this.

557
00:34:34.540 --> 00:34:37.780
And, you know, if Ken doesn't come,

558
00:34:40.420 --> 00:34:42.060
you know, might be better.

559
00:34:42.060 --> 00:34:43.100
Might be better that way.

560
00:34:43.100 --> 00:34:43.940
I don't know.

561
00:34:43.940 --> 00:34:45.820
His daughter's coming to the next weekend.

562
00:34:45.820 --> 00:34:48.260
She's, her and I are real close.

563
00:34:48.260 --> 00:34:50.980
And she went to the one with me in the fall.

564
00:34:50.980 --> 00:34:53.060
But anyway, so it's a better place,

565
00:34:53.060 --> 00:34:54.900
much better place to be than going,

566
00:34:54.900 --> 00:34:59.100
oh, I wonder if he's coming or he should come or, you know.

567
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:04.000
Worried about what he's doing.

568
00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:09.080
And so, even our session yesterday helped some with that, and, and he got a new job

569
00:35:09.080 --> 00:35:14.600
a week ago, I think I might have mentioned that to you all but now the blue he just,

570
00:35:14.600 --> 00:35:16.080
and I had prayed for him.

571
00:35:16.080 --> 00:35:21.360
My mentor said, she said she prayed for her husband to get a dream job.

572
00:35:21.360 --> 00:35:25.000
Years back when he needed a job is she like the Lord had her like step into heaven he's

573
00:35:25.000 --> 00:35:29.020
like you're seated in heaven and he gave her the strategy, and he got a dream job.

574
00:35:29.020 --> 00:35:31.840
I mean like he's still doing it by mentor.

575
00:35:31.840 --> 00:35:36.540
So I've kind of prayed that for Ken and all of a sudden he got this job that he really

576
00:35:36.540 --> 00:35:42.660
likes it, and it's laid back, and he quit his other part time job and he got another

577
00:35:42.660 --> 00:35:47.260
part time job that he can do whatever he wants to do, do it.

578
00:35:47.260 --> 00:35:51.300
So last weekend he worked all week, and he ended up working all weekend.

579
00:35:51.300 --> 00:35:57.180
And you know what, I was like, Okay, you know, I didn't.

580
00:35:57.180 --> 00:36:01.300
I told Ashley it was kind of a win because he was only going to work half a day Sunday

581
00:36:01.300 --> 00:36:05.460
to do some media work for he used to have his own marketing company, and it was going

582
00:36:05.460 --> 00:36:12.540
to do so he was, it was actually on the news Sunday night for, for this new job, but he

583
00:36:12.540 --> 00:36:15.660
called and said I think I'm going to be here all day and all evening till kind of late

584
00:36:15.660 --> 00:36:21.500
tonight and I was like, Okay, you know, in the past I would have been what, because we

585
00:36:21.500 --> 00:36:25.500
were supposed to do something that's just like okay.

586
00:36:25.500 --> 00:36:31.620
And so, so I found it, you know, and then Monday he something happened and I started

587
00:36:31.620 --> 00:36:37.900
to respond wrong I reacted, but I quickly turned it around to responding differently.

588
00:36:37.900 --> 00:36:41.740
So I'm just seeing some progress.

589
00:36:41.740 --> 00:36:48.340
You know, and that I don't like this is so good we don't have to.

590
00:36:48.340 --> 00:36:50.940
We leave the outcome up to God.

591
00:36:50.940 --> 00:36:53.020
You know.

592
00:36:53.020 --> 00:36:58.100
And the good thing is that I'm seeing more and more as he's working things out of me

593
00:36:58.100 --> 00:37:02.300
through all the stuff going on in my life, started to see it even more.

594
00:37:02.300 --> 00:37:03.940
And through this relationship.

595
00:37:03.940 --> 00:37:06.140
He's working things out of me.

596
00:37:06.140 --> 00:37:10.940
So the outcome isn't even as important as, okay, God, I'm just looking at you trying

597
00:37:10.940 --> 00:37:14.220
to look at you and what are you doing with me.

598
00:37:14.220 --> 00:37:22.940
And you know, what are you, what are you trying to work out of me and so, so I'm just so grateful

599
00:37:22.980 --> 00:37:24.980
that we've had this time together.

600
00:37:24.980 --> 00:37:25.980
Yes.

601
00:37:25.980 --> 00:37:30.380
Yeah, I know we're gonna miss it.

602
00:37:30.380 --> 00:37:37.180
So go ahead, or, huh, what, or community day.

603
00:37:37.180 --> 00:37:38.180
That's right.

604
00:37:38.180 --> 00:37:39.180
Are you going to get us together Tammy?

605
00:37:39.180 --> 00:37:40.180
Yes, Tammy.

606
00:37:40.180 --> 00:37:47.180
Okay, well, I'll just say tag you're it Rita.

607
00:37:47.180 --> 00:37:48.180
Okay.

608
00:37:48.420 --> 00:37:49.420
Okay.

609
00:37:49.420 --> 00:37:52.420
Um, well, that's all good stuff, Karen.

610
00:37:52.420 --> 00:37:53.420
I love that.

611
00:37:53.420 --> 00:37:54.420
Yeah.

612
00:37:54.420 --> 00:38:06.980
And letting, letting, letting things go and, and just leaving it to God for the outcome.

613
00:38:06.980 --> 00:38:10.940
So with me, I don't really have anything to report.

614
00:38:10.940 --> 00:38:18.700
I feel like I'm so bogged down with work that when I look up, I'm like, okay, I'm gonna

615
00:38:18.700 --> 00:38:19.700
look for you guys.

616
00:38:19.700 --> 00:38:26.580
And, and like, he, you know, he gives me a little gift, but I really need to, you know,

617
00:38:26.580 --> 00:38:29.780
see it in my, in the things that I'm doing.

618
00:38:29.780 --> 00:38:30.780
Again.

619
00:38:30.780 --> 00:38:31.780
I know.

620
00:38:31.780 --> 00:38:37.100
I don't know if it's just because I'm just used to it, or I don't know.

621
00:38:37.100 --> 00:38:46.500
I mean, I think I'm not stressed out like I used to be, but it's just kind of, I guess

622
00:38:46.500 --> 00:38:47.500
the norm now.

623
00:38:47.500 --> 00:38:49.700
So I don't know if it's supposed to be better.

624
00:38:49.700 --> 00:38:54.700
I mean, I'm just glad, you know, I'm not stressed and stuff, but I'm like, well, what else is

625
00:38:54.700 --> 00:38:55.700
there Lord?

626
00:38:55.700 --> 00:39:06.220
So, um, but yeah, I, yeah, I don't have a lot to report.

627
00:39:06.340 --> 00:39:13.140
I had my son last weekend and I did pray that like, I had a better relationship with him

628
00:39:13.140 --> 00:39:15.580
and not trying to teach him so much.

629
00:39:15.580 --> 00:39:19.860
I know Ashley's like, don't try to teach people.

630
00:39:19.860 --> 00:39:28.420
You have to be the thing and, um, and notice I wasn't react, I don't know, it was just,

631
00:39:28.420 --> 00:39:29.420
it's just kind of silly.

632
00:39:29.420 --> 00:39:35.780
Like he's a boy and I try to play with him and I'm like, he's being too rough and instead

633
00:39:35.780 --> 00:39:38.380
of like communicating, I just got upset.

634
00:39:38.380 --> 00:39:39.380
I got triggered.

635
00:39:39.380 --> 00:39:43.420
Like, all right, you're throwing the ball too hard.

636
00:39:43.420 --> 00:39:49.220
And then I just got upset and then I snapped out of it and I was like, okay, Lord, I need

637
00:39:49.220 --> 00:39:51.980
to learn to communicate and not just be upset.

638
00:39:51.980 --> 00:39:59.980
And I just, you know, just let him know, um, you know, that, that I.

639
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:02.240
but oh, I apologize for getting upset.

640
00:40:02.240 --> 00:40:05.520
And I told him I needed to communicate

641
00:40:05.520 --> 00:40:08.120
how I was feeling before he just reacted.

642
00:40:08.120 --> 00:40:12.600
So I guess it's, you know, it's humbling

643
00:40:12.600 --> 00:40:16.520
and it's good that I didn't let it linger

644
00:40:16.520 --> 00:40:20.640
and, you know, affect our relationship, I guess.

645
00:40:22.280 --> 00:40:23.760
Yeah, I don't know.

646
00:40:23.760 --> 00:40:27.120
I think it's a win just, yeah.

647
00:40:27.120 --> 00:40:29.120
Cause then we just kind of avoid each other

648
00:40:29.120 --> 00:40:32.680
for a little bit and then, you know,

649
00:40:32.680 --> 00:40:34.880
feelings are just kind of under the surface,

650
00:40:34.880 --> 00:40:36.520
but cause I was able to just,

651
00:40:38.600 --> 00:40:40.160
I guess the Lord helped me recognize it

652
00:40:40.160 --> 00:40:41.200
right then and there.

653
00:40:46.960 --> 00:40:50.680
But other than that, I feel like everything's good.

654
00:40:54.400 --> 00:40:55.800
Yeah, that's it.

655
00:40:56.800 --> 00:40:58.040
That was good.

656
00:40:59.400 --> 00:41:00.280
That was good.

657
00:41:00.280 --> 00:41:01.160
That was big.

658
00:41:01.160 --> 00:41:02.440
That's a big win, really.

659
00:41:05.200 --> 00:41:07.800
I've been one thing, I've been trying to thank the Lord.

660
00:41:07.800 --> 00:41:10.280
I don't do it every day, but thank him trying to do it.

661
00:41:10.280 --> 00:41:13.600
Thank you for sweet surprises today, Lord, from you.

662
00:41:14.960 --> 00:41:17.200
And that one thing Ashley reminded me,

663
00:41:18.280 --> 00:41:19.640
you were, I think we were in one group.

664
00:41:19.640 --> 00:41:22.240
She said, you know, you may ask the Lord

665
00:41:22.240 --> 00:41:25.280
to show you his love and he may show it to you

666
00:41:25.760 --> 00:41:27.680
with a postman knocking on your door.

667
00:41:28.640 --> 00:41:30.600
And, you know, and you know what?

668
00:41:30.600 --> 00:41:31.840
He knocked on the door yesterday

669
00:41:31.840 --> 00:41:34.320
while I was in my session right here, I'm in my sunroom.

670
00:41:34.320 --> 00:41:38.280
And he came in the door while I was on session with her

671
00:41:38.280 --> 00:41:39.880
and he comes in quite a bit

672
00:41:39.880 --> 00:41:42.160
cause I have him come in my sunroom.

673
00:41:42.160 --> 00:41:45.200
But yeah, but it reminds me, like twice he did that.

674
00:41:45.200 --> 00:41:49.000
It just reminded me, God shows his love in many ways.

675
00:41:49.000 --> 00:41:53.160
So asking for sweet surprises daily,

676
00:41:53.160 --> 00:41:55.080
I think has been, is good.

677
00:41:55.080 --> 00:41:59.440
Maybe something, Lord help, remind us to just thank you

678
00:41:59.440 --> 00:42:02.600
for those sweet surprises if we're supposed to do that.

679
00:42:02.600 --> 00:42:05.800
Cause he is a good father.

680
00:42:06.800 --> 00:42:07.640
He is.

681
00:42:07.640 --> 00:42:10.080
So yeah, Rita, that was a good win.

682
00:42:11.120 --> 00:42:12.560
Thank you.

683
00:42:12.560 --> 00:42:14.560
And I like your Texas shirt.

684
00:42:14.560 --> 00:42:15.400
Oh yeah.

685
00:42:17.520 --> 00:42:19.280
Yeah, Oasis.

686
00:42:20.280 --> 00:42:23.560
Oh, Oasis, that's a good color on you.

687
00:42:23.560 --> 00:42:24.400
Thanks.

688
00:42:25.680 --> 00:42:27.000
I like it.

689
00:42:27.000 --> 00:42:27.840
Thank you.

690
00:42:27.840 --> 00:42:30.120
Yeah, I've been asking God, like that's the thing too,

691
00:42:30.120 --> 00:42:34.480
is like, I guess when I'm in Louisiana, I eat the best food.

692
00:42:34.480 --> 00:42:37.680
So like, just as like a connection to Rita,

693
00:42:37.680 --> 00:42:39.800
like in what you were saying, Karen,

694
00:42:39.800 --> 00:42:43.440
about like the sweet experiences or like a sweet moment.

695
00:42:43.440 --> 00:42:47.600
And so like my husband, he loves crawfish

696
00:42:47.600 --> 00:42:50.760
and like, I love it too now.

697
00:42:50.760 --> 00:42:53.120
And so we went back to this one place,

698
00:42:53.120 --> 00:42:55.600
we ate it like two lunches in a row.

699
00:42:55.600 --> 00:43:00.040
And the second lunch, we went by this beautiful pond

700
00:43:00.040 --> 00:43:03.520
with these old homes, like back bar.

701
00:43:03.520 --> 00:43:06.640
Like the light was glistening off of the pond

702
00:43:06.640 --> 00:43:09.440
and there were like, it was nature, the sun was gorgeous.

703
00:43:09.440 --> 00:43:12.600
I was like, thank you God for taste buds,

704
00:43:12.600 --> 00:43:14.000
for great company.

705
00:43:14.000 --> 00:43:17.840
Thank you for, you know, like this beautiful scenery.

706
00:43:17.840 --> 00:43:20.960
And just like, it's just kind of like a different way.

707
00:43:20.960 --> 00:43:22.680
Like, you know, we used to like say, you know,

708
00:43:22.680 --> 00:43:23.640
some people might still do it.

709
00:43:23.640 --> 00:43:24.840
I'm not really good at it anymore,

710
00:43:24.840 --> 00:43:26.960
but like saying grace before every meal,

711
00:43:26.960 --> 00:43:29.320
but just kind of like, thank you.

712
00:43:29.320 --> 00:43:30.760
Let's just eat this together.

713
00:43:30.760 --> 00:43:32.720
You know what I mean?

714
00:43:32.720 --> 00:43:34.920
And so just thinking about those,

715
00:43:34.920 --> 00:43:37.560
they're small things, but they're like really big things

716
00:43:37.560 --> 00:43:39.120
and they just make me really happy.

717
00:43:39.120 --> 00:43:41.680
So I'm like, thank God for taste buds.

718
00:43:41.680 --> 00:43:42.520
Absolutely.

719
00:43:45.320 --> 00:43:46.160
Yeah.

720
00:43:46.160 --> 00:43:47.080
No doubt.

721
00:43:47.080 --> 00:43:48.000
Yeah.

722
00:43:48.000 --> 00:43:51.320
Asking God today for, it's kind of a praise point.

723
00:43:51.320 --> 00:43:52.360
I was asking God today,

724
00:43:52.360 --> 00:43:54.840
cause like, I feel like I'm always asking him questions

725
00:43:54.840 --> 00:43:57.680
and like, okay, like, well, what do I do with this?

726
00:43:57.680 --> 00:43:59.320
Or like, this is a concern, but I'm like,

727
00:43:59.320 --> 00:44:00.880
I just felt like it's kind of one-sided.

728
00:44:00.880 --> 00:44:02.560
So today I was like, well, Lord,

729
00:44:02.560 --> 00:44:05.080
is there anything I could do for you today or whatever?

730
00:44:05.080 --> 00:44:08.200
And it was so cool, y'all, let me tell you what happened.

731
00:44:08.200 --> 00:44:13.200
So I got texts from this lady asking if I wanted to,

732
00:44:13.960 --> 00:44:17.600
if I was available to serve at the children's ministry

733
00:44:17.600 --> 00:44:21.400
at the church where I attend here and there, right.

734
00:44:22.280 --> 00:44:26.120
And like the first, it's like, it's such a God thing

735
00:44:26.120 --> 00:44:28.400
because like, it was a God appointment

736
00:44:28.400 --> 00:44:29.960
that I met her in the first place

737
00:44:29.960 --> 00:44:31.760
and sat next to her that time.

738
00:44:31.760 --> 00:44:33.440
And you know, it has like that five minutes

739
00:44:33.440 --> 00:44:34.680
of just sharing or whatever,

740
00:44:34.680 --> 00:44:37.280
or like right before they do offering and everything.

741
00:44:37.280 --> 00:44:39.680
And so she told me and I just expressed like,

742
00:44:39.680 --> 00:44:41.520
you know, like, yeah, I have real hard for kids,

743
00:44:41.520 --> 00:44:42.640
yada, yada, yada.

744
00:44:42.640 --> 00:44:43.480
And so she was like, well,

745
00:44:43.480 --> 00:44:44.960
we need help in the children's ministry.

746
00:44:44.960 --> 00:44:48.040
So anyway, I filled out the background check thing

747
00:44:48.040 --> 00:44:50.720
and signed everything and sent it to the youth pastor

748
00:44:50.720 --> 00:44:52.120
who she had connected me with,

749
00:44:52.120 --> 00:44:54.960
but I hadn't heard anything and I wasn't stressing about it.

750
00:44:54.960 --> 00:44:57.680
But anyway, she reached out to me today like,

751
00:44:57.680 --> 00:44:59.360
hey, do you have availability March 12th?

752
00:44:59.360 --> 00:45:00.200
And I was like,

753
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:06.360
I was like, before I replied, I remembered that I was going to do, my sister and I are

754
00:45:06.360 --> 00:45:12.720
doing a birthday dinner with, well, birthday outing with my dad at Topgolf on the 12th.

755
00:45:12.720 --> 00:45:16.960
So I knew what that day looked like, but I was like, just, my dad hadn't seen me at the

756
00:45:16.960 --> 00:45:17.960
time.

757
00:45:17.960 --> 00:45:21.400
So I called him and I was like, hey, dad, like, do you have any idea about what time?

758
00:45:21.400 --> 00:45:24.560
Because I want to make sure that I'll be able to go to church before, but I think, you know,

759
00:45:24.560 --> 00:45:26.360
you're going to church anyway, so it should be okay.

760
00:45:26.720 --> 00:45:29.000
And he told me all the greatest story.

761
00:45:29.000 --> 00:45:32.440
Like he told me about a little bit about like his conversion.

762
00:45:32.440 --> 00:45:39.040
He said that he got saved by reading the, at the end of the back of the Gideon Bible,

763
00:45:39.040 --> 00:45:41.280
it tells you how to receive Christ or something.

764
00:45:41.280 --> 00:45:44.960
He said he did that and that's how he received Christ.

765
00:45:44.960 --> 00:45:49.840
And then he said, like, I remember him saying like, he was kind of upset with God because

766
00:45:49.840 --> 00:45:53.760
like, I think he was like maybe 23, but he had gone to church before when he was younger

767
00:45:53.760 --> 00:45:56.000
with his mom, but no one had actually told him.

768
00:45:56.240 --> 00:45:57.000
That's what it was.

769
00:45:57.000 --> 00:45:59.120
And so he was like, what if I had passed away?

770
00:45:59.120 --> 00:46:03.760
Like, he was so upset that like no one had really offered him or told him about how to

771
00:46:03.760 --> 00:46:05.120
receive Christ.

772
00:46:05.120 --> 00:46:08.040
And so God, he's like, God, you know, was kind of like, okay.

773
00:46:08.040 --> 00:46:10.480
And after a while I was like, okay, I understand you're mad with me.

774
00:46:10.480 --> 00:46:11.040
That's okay.

775
00:46:11.040 --> 00:46:12.400
So go do something about it.

776
00:46:12.400 --> 00:46:13.720
Like tell other people.

777
00:46:13.720 --> 00:46:17.320
And so that's how he felt like he got the call to the children's ministry.

778
00:46:17.320 --> 00:46:22.680
And so he like got connected with a church and this guy took him under his wing and he

779
00:46:22.680 --> 00:46:24.480
started serving in that church.

780
00:46:24.480 --> 00:46:29.600
And then when we went to Oklahoma, the mother and pastor of the church kind of ended up

781
00:46:29.600 --> 00:46:33.920
being like my grandparents, so to speak, like my old grandparents, whatever.

782
00:46:33.920 --> 00:46:38.160
And they asked like, hey, do you want to, how do you want to be, like, how do you want

783
00:46:38.160 --> 00:46:39.800
to serve or is your call?

784
00:46:39.800 --> 00:46:42.320
He's like, I've been called to the children's, to children.

785
00:46:42.320 --> 00:46:46.200
And so she sent him to like Willie George Ministries, which is all the curriculum and

786
00:46:46.200 --> 00:46:51.520
the songs that they use to start the children's ministry at the church that I grew up with,

787
00:46:51.520 --> 00:46:53.440
like so impactful in my life.

788
00:46:53.440 --> 00:46:56.040
Like, sorry, I'm getting really excited.

789
00:46:56.040 --> 00:46:57.120
Let me pause.

790
00:46:57.120 --> 00:47:01.920
So anyway, so then I'm just like, oh my God, I didn't know that.

791
00:47:01.920 --> 00:47:03.360
He was like, yeah.

792
00:47:03.360 --> 00:47:05.360
And I was like, that is so cool.

793
00:47:05.360 --> 00:47:07.920
And I was just like, the call is generational.

794
00:47:07.920 --> 00:47:09.600
Like it's like a family legacy.

795
00:47:09.600 --> 00:47:12.120
I feel like I know God has planted that in my heart.

796
00:47:12.120 --> 00:47:16.840
And I've been burnt out so much for the last year just as an educator.

797
00:47:16.840 --> 00:47:18.440
And this time has just been great.

798
00:47:18.440 --> 00:47:20.640
Like my year of jubilee just to rest.

799
00:47:20.680 --> 00:47:23.720
It's like that desire has just been bubbling.

800
00:47:23.720 --> 00:47:27.240
And so I was like so excited to like hear my dad's testimony.

801
00:47:27.240 --> 00:47:30.960
And then he was talking about my little sisters, which is a whole little story, but like five

802
00:47:30.960 --> 00:47:32.800
and eight or some crazy thing.

803
00:47:32.800 --> 00:47:36.720
So anyway, he was telling me about how he like one of them was like that.

804
00:47:36.720 --> 00:47:38.000
I want to be baptized.

805
00:47:38.000 --> 00:47:43.760
Like he was like, I'm just go talk to your go talk to your sister, to your to the lady

806
00:47:43.760 --> 00:47:48.480
at church or whatever at Children's Church to see if she's told you about what baptism

807
00:47:48.480 --> 00:47:49.480
was.

808
00:47:49.480 --> 00:47:50.480
And he hadn't done it for a couple of weeks.

809
00:47:50.480 --> 00:47:55.880
And then a little one who's five was like, Dad, have you talked to KK's teacher yet?

810
00:47:55.880 --> 00:47:58.120
Because I mean, I want to be baptized too.

811
00:47:58.120 --> 00:48:01.120
I want to be to church too, because he had explained to them, they're like, when you

812
00:48:01.120 --> 00:48:05.760
receive Christ, it's not like you, you are the church you don't go to is not the church

813
00:48:05.760 --> 00:48:06.760
is not the church building.

814
00:48:06.760 --> 00:48:10.120
He goes, and I was like, well, my five year old little sister, my son, I want to be to

815
00:48:10.120 --> 00:48:11.120
church.

816
00:48:11.120 --> 00:48:12.800
Like, it's just like, to me, it's just so exciting.

817
00:48:12.800 --> 00:48:14.840
It's just like, so full circle.

818
00:48:14.840 --> 00:48:20.120
And I'm just like, look at God, I'm just so thankful for him putting that in my heart

819
00:48:20.120 --> 00:48:22.560
in just reestablishing that.

820
00:48:22.560 --> 00:48:27.640
And before was just so much about like, educating kids in the school system was like, I want

821
00:48:27.640 --> 00:48:33.520
to do something for kids in the kingdom, you don't mean to like, so that was like, my testimony

822
00:48:33.520 --> 00:48:34.520
today.

823
00:48:34.520 --> 00:48:36.520
So I was like, Oh, how can I What can I do for you today?

824
00:48:36.520 --> 00:48:41.520
And I know he didn't like half day, like somebody he's gonna have sign up and step up.

825
00:48:41.520 --> 00:48:44.520
And I was just like, you want me to do that?

826
00:48:44.520 --> 00:48:45.520
Okay, I'm so excited.

827
00:48:45.520 --> 00:48:46.520
Thank you.

828
00:48:46.520 --> 00:48:47.520
Anyway, that's what's up.

829
00:48:47.520 --> 00:48:48.520
I love it.

830
00:48:48.520 --> 00:48:49.520
That is really cool.

831
00:48:49.520 --> 00:48:50.520
Tammy.

832
00:48:50.520 --> 00:48:51.520
Thank you.

833
00:48:51.520 --> 00:48:52.520
So exciting.

834
00:48:52.520 --> 00:48:53.520
I'm really excited.

835
00:48:53.520 --> 00:48:54.520
As you can tell.

836
00:48:54.520 --> 00:48:55.520
Yeah, that's awesome.

837
00:48:55.520 --> 00:48:56.520
Oh, yeah.

838
00:48:56.520 --> 00:48:57.520
God, that's a sweet surprise.

839
00:48:57.520 --> 00:48:58.520
It really is a sweet surprise.

840
00:48:58.520 --> 00:48:59.520
Yeah, I mean, yeah, kind of legacy.

841
00:48:59.520 --> 00:49:00.520
Like you said, that's, that's awesome.

842
00:49:00.520 --> 00:49:01.520
Yeah.

843
00:49:01.520 --> 00:49:30.520
Yeah, it's been great this last month, I decided to just give it to God and not try to like,

844
00:49:31.520 --> 00:49:34.520
dictate what this time needed to look like and what I needed to accomplish.

845
00:49:34.520 --> 00:49:36.520
It's been so life giving.

846
00:49:36.520 --> 00:49:41.520
But yeah, I'm glad like, I've learned so much and developed over this time.

847
00:49:41.520 --> 00:49:46.520
And he's restored that desire to like, want to get back and start working and doing things.

848
00:49:46.520 --> 00:49:48.520
And you know what I mean?

849
00:49:48.520 --> 00:49:52.520
Like, the before I was just do I want to be a substitute teacher because that allowed me

850
00:49:52.520 --> 00:49:57.520
to go back and forth with my husband about Rouge, but I was like, income like, so I just

851
00:49:58.520 --> 00:49:59.520
started looking at LinkedIn.

852
00:49:59.520 --> 00:50:00.520
It just.

853
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.760
jobs, like there's so many remote jobs. And I'm like, I

854
00:50:00.520 --> 00:50:01.520
Yeah.

855
00:50:01.520 --> 00:50:02.520
Yeah.

856
00:50:02.520 --> 00:50:03.520
Yeah.

857
00:50:02.760 --> 00:50:05.800
have the skill set for that, you know what I mean, where I can

858
00:50:03.520 --> 00:50:03.520


859
00:50:05.800 --> 00:50:09.960
make more money. And then what what Ashley was talking about,

860
00:50:09.960 --> 00:50:13.760
like, my thing is just to been, well, you know, if I'm doing

861
00:50:13.760 --> 00:50:16.760
substitute, I'm going to make a minimal type of thing of salary

862
00:50:16.840 --> 00:50:20.440
amount of money, but I have a lot of flexibility. But if I do

863
00:50:20.440 --> 00:50:24.120
this remote thing, where it's full time work, this gets paid

864
00:50:24.640 --> 00:50:28.880
good money, then it's like all of these dreams and plans and

865
00:50:28.880 --> 00:50:32.040
business ideas, I'm like, well, I have the time. So I'm like,

866
00:50:32.040 --> 00:50:35.480
God, I give it to you, I'm going to apply, you're going to open

867
00:50:35.480 --> 00:50:38.000
the door that needs to be open, close the door that needs to be

868
00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:41.880
shut. And it's going to be good. And all in your due time,

869
00:50:41.880 --> 00:50:44.880
everything's going to work out. So I'm just going to have that

870
00:50:44.880 --> 00:50:46.200
perspective towards it all.

871
00:50:47.040 --> 00:50:52.920
That's really good. That's really good. And yeah. And I'm,

872
00:50:53.120 --> 00:50:54.840
I'm going to be in agreement. We're all going to start

873
00:50:54.840 --> 00:51:00.720
dreaming again. Yes. Yes. Yeah. And I felt like I kind of had a

874
00:51:00.720 --> 00:51:05.160
new a new pep in my step yesterday. And Ashley's meeting

875
00:51:05.160 --> 00:51:09.600
was really helpful. I don't know something. And just feeling a

876
00:51:09.600 --> 00:51:12.680
little better. I went for a walk and I went to physical therapy

877
00:51:12.680 --> 00:51:15.880
and got a good report there got a good report. And so my massage

878
00:51:15.880 --> 00:51:19.160
therapist and taking more time to take care of me.

879
00:51:20.160 --> 00:51:20.840
That's good.

880
00:51:21.680 --> 00:51:25.360
Slowly, but yeah. Yeah.

881
00:51:25.600 --> 00:51:28.280
Fabulous, too. I'm like, I wanted to tell you when you got

882
00:51:28.280 --> 00:51:29.720
on. I was like, okay, cute.

883
00:51:31.720 --> 00:51:35.400
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And this is even after a

884
00:51:35.400 --> 00:51:38.560
massage, but I washed it today. I did wash and style it. I've

885
00:51:38.560 --> 00:51:42.600
kind of got the I kind of like the fluffy. It's just naturally

886
00:51:42.600 --> 00:51:44.680
curly, which is nice. And I just do a lot of

887
00:51:45.680 --> 00:51:52.280
do a little work on it. And, and, yeah, and then I pull it up

888
00:51:52.280 --> 00:51:55.280
in a clip a lot too. When it when I wake up and it's kind of

889
00:51:55.280 --> 00:51:58.440
flat. I'm just like, okay, or I'm a hat girl too. I have

890
00:51:58.440 --> 00:52:02.800
bling hats. I don't know if you've seen my bling hat. I wear

891
00:52:02.800 --> 00:52:04.280
bling hats. Yeah.

892
00:52:06.400 --> 00:52:10.560
Huh? Are they ball caps? Yeah, I like ball caps. Yep.

893
00:52:11.200 --> 00:52:11.640
Hmm.

894
00:52:12.080 --> 00:52:16.400
And like, like, like rhinestones and stuff. Oh, yeah.

895
00:52:16.800 --> 00:52:21.200
Yeah, I'm, yeah, I'm a bling. I like bling. I don't know what it

896
00:52:21.200 --> 00:52:23.640
was just a few years ago. I started buying bling. I got

897
00:52:23.640 --> 00:52:25.000
bling on my glasses.

898
00:52:25.840 --> 00:52:27.880
I was just poking out. I didn't know it was bling.

899
00:52:28.640 --> 00:52:31.320
Oh, yeah, they're called Jimmy crystals or crystals. And they're

900
00:52:31.320 --> 00:52:35.000
from New York. And they had they had these on sale even. And

901
00:52:35.000 --> 00:52:41.640
yeah. So bling. Yeah. So we might as well shine right inside

902
00:52:41.640 --> 00:52:43.320
and out. That's, that's my motto.

903
00:52:44.640 --> 00:52:47.440
I've been seeing articles and like all kinds of things about

904
00:52:47.440 --> 00:52:52.440
light and shining today. Like it's crazy. Like, like a news

905
00:52:52.440 --> 00:52:57.280
article and other stuff. Like I'm just like, oh, and so now

906
00:52:57.280 --> 00:53:01.920
you're saying it. Yeah. So good about it.

907
00:53:02.920 --> 00:53:06.240
Yeah, I have a lot of Mariana jewelry, too. You can't see

908
00:53:06.240 --> 00:53:10.360
these real well. But all of her stuff Mariana if you look it up,

909
00:53:10.360 --> 00:53:14.560
it's all from Israel. And all of her stuff I have. It's just a

910
00:53:14.560 --> 00:53:17.640
real blingy stuff. It's all of her stuff is guaranteed for

911
00:53:17.640 --> 00:53:20.880
life. If so, if a stone falls out, you take it back where you

912
00:53:20.880 --> 00:53:23.360
bought it, they send it to Israel, fix it and send it back.

913
00:53:23.640 --> 00:53:28.080
Wow. For free. So it's gonna it's not that expensive, but

914
00:53:28.080 --> 00:53:33.040
her stuff's fun. Mariana, it's all over. It's in every town.

915
00:53:34.680 --> 00:53:37.200
Or you can look online. But anyway, I don't know what got me

916
00:53:37.200 --> 00:53:45.000
started a few years ago on bling, but but it's what did I

917
00:53:45.000 --> 00:53:47.640
heard one lady, they talked to a lady that turned 100. And she

918
00:53:47.640 --> 00:53:50.080
said, What's your secret to living a long time? And she

919
00:53:50.080 --> 00:53:52.440
said, Well, I get up every day and I put on a little makeup and

920
00:53:52.440 --> 00:53:53.600
I put on some jewelry.

921
00:53:54.080 --> 00:53:58.640
And yeah, doing the things that make you feel good and joyful.

922
00:53:58.680 --> 00:54:03.880
Yeah. I don't know who that lady is. But I love her. I agree.

923
00:54:03.920 --> 00:54:08.000
That's my secret to long life. Determine that I get up every

924
00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:12.080
morning. Since I was 13 years old, but on makeup, but I'm

925
00:54:12.080 --> 00:54:15.880
sorry. And I'm like, I'm ready. Even when I'm sick. It makes me

926
00:54:15.880 --> 00:54:19.560
feel better. And I swear that I get I get well faster. I'm

927
00:54:19.560 --> 00:54:20.000
telling you.

928
00:54:20.680 --> 00:54:24.040
There you go. I wear my earrings. I wear to go walking.

929
00:54:24.040 --> 00:54:28.560
I've got on my bling when I go. Oh, yeah. Sometimes I have on

930
00:54:28.560 --> 00:54:35.320
bling rings. I Yeah, yeah. My husband's really sweet. He'll

931
00:54:35.320 --> 00:54:37.960
say, actually, you do know that you don't have to do that for

932
00:54:37.960 --> 00:54:40.760
me. And I'm like, Oh, I know. You assured me that I feel very

933
00:54:40.760 --> 00:54:46.320
secure that I really appreciate it. I do it for me. This is how

934
00:54:46.440 --> 00:54:52.120
I like me. You know, I have it has to have a friend and that in

935
00:54:52.120 --> 00:54:55.040
ministry and he's probably I think he's in his 70s, maybe

936
00:54:55.040 --> 00:54:58.720
close to 80s now. And he was in even in the summer, he will

937
00:54:58.720 --> 00:54:59.760
dress in

938
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:03.760
Um, he's very well trimmed, you know, white hair, beard, you know, mustaches,

939
00:55:03.760 --> 00:55:07.760
they're goatee mustache and all that. He's got, he's very well, you know,

940
00:55:07.760 --> 00:55:12.000
quaffed, you know, trimmed. I know that's not a word that you use for, for guys. He's just,

941
00:55:12.000 --> 00:55:16.880
you know, very immaculate. And he, um, and he's just like this big papa bear,

942
00:55:16.880 --> 00:55:21.520
you know, he looks like a Christian Santa Claus. Like in other words, like, I mean,

943
00:55:21.520 --> 00:55:25.440
not that your Santa Claus, you know, is bad. I'm just saying, but it's like, Christian isn't like,

944
00:55:25.440 --> 00:55:29.200
he just looks like, I don't know, like a combination between Jesus and Santa Claus.

945
00:55:29.200 --> 00:55:37.920
And he wears these pullover, uh, sweater vests, you know, the ones that have a V neck,

946
00:55:37.920 --> 00:55:43.360
you know, when to wear them over, you know, uh, you know, button down shirts and everything.

947
00:55:43.360 --> 00:55:46.960
And then his slacks that I'm telling you what, he just looks so fit together.

948
00:55:46.960 --> 00:55:51.680
Where's it even in the summer. And you said, and you told my husband, you said, do you know why

949
00:55:51.680 --> 00:55:58.240
I dress like this? Because I like this and God likes how he made, how he made me. And he,

950
00:55:58.240 --> 00:56:03.520
and he made me like this. God is very pleased when he looks on me like this, because I'm happy.

951
00:56:03.520 --> 00:56:07.440
He said, I don't care if other people think it's weird. If other people don't understand and other

952
00:56:07.440 --> 00:56:13.440
people don't like how I dress, I like how I dress. I'm like, amen. You are now my favorite person.

953
00:56:17.040 --> 00:56:20.240
I think that's fun. And now I'm going to have to look at Marian jewelry.

954
00:56:22.000 --> 00:56:27.760
Y'all are all talking my language, all of the stuff, but I was excited to hear everybody's

955
00:56:27.760 --> 00:56:34.800
wins, all of this stuff that y'all have noticed, um, uh, that y'all have noticed, not just like,

956
00:56:34.800 --> 00:56:40.160
like that you've noticed how you chosen the Lord. You've noticed how it has affected your life,

957
00:56:40.160 --> 00:56:43.120
how you've been able to be more in rest, how you've chosen more freedom.

958
00:56:43.680 --> 00:56:48.800
And it was very excited to hear how y'all were saying that you could, that you were seeing God

959
00:56:48.800 --> 00:56:53.040
like, Oh, I saw God here. And I saw that God did this. And I saw that God's like this,

960
00:56:53.040 --> 00:56:57.680
you know, cause that is very important. I'm currently writing the journal for the next

961
00:56:58.560 --> 00:57:02.160
rest intensive. I'm going to have a journal for the next rest intensive. Very excited.

962
00:57:02.160 --> 00:57:06.000
At least that's the plan. I fully expect it to get out the door.

963
00:57:06.000 --> 00:57:10.720
And, um, and one of the questions on it is, you know, how, how have you seen God today?

964
00:57:11.520 --> 00:57:19.360
And it, and three things every single day, how have you seen God's day? Because it checked that,

965
00:57:19.360 --> 00:57:25.840
that completely changed things for me. I say that a lot because I'm telling you it, it, it really

966
00:57:25.840 --> 00:57:32.880
was wild how each of these things were just so transformative in my life because it was me

967
00:57:32.880 --> 00:57:38.320
choosing God over anything else. And it was who is God and where can I see him in my life and

968
00:57:38.320 --> 00:57:46.320
whatever. And I would think about it. I would find multiple things all day long about where I

969
00:57:46.320 --> 00:57:51.360
was seeing God. And, and so it suddenly occurred to me that that's not something that I've talked

970
00:57:51.360 --> 00:57:57.440
about just a whole lot enough for people to, um, for me to hear that other people are doing the

971
00:57:57.440 --> 00:58:02.960
same thing, that they're actually looking for God as opposed to just trying to figure out, okay,

972
00:58:02.960 --> 00:58:09.280
did I feel better today? Cause Hey, we do want to feel better, but we, we feel better because of

973
00:58:09.280 --> 00:58:15.440
how we see God. Like that makes us feel better is who is my God. The reason we don't feel good.

974
00:58:16.080 --> 00:58:19.920
In other words, the reason is, is because there's something about God that we don't believe is as

975
00:58:19.920 --> 00:58:27.440
good as he says that he is. And so we have to learn to retrain ourselves to, to, um, uh, to

976
00:58:27.440 --> 00:58:32.960
actually see him, to see his goodness, to understand that there's not just constant

977
00:58:32.960 --> 00:58:40.000
communication from him to us, but constant communion with he and us all day long every

978
00:58:40.000 --> 00:58:46.640
day. Cause remember it's your life is you and God living it out. It's not you living it. And God's

979
00:58:46.640 --> 00:58:51.280
just on standby for you to check in every now and then making sure he's okay with what you're doing,

980
00:58:52.000 --> 00:58:59.120
you know, and if he's got new, you know, orders that you have to execute, he's like, no, this is

981
00:58:59.120 --> 00:59:06.000
you and he living life together, making decisions, doing stuff, coming up with ideas, co-creating,

982
00:59:06.560 --> 00:59:11.680
having fun for the heck, absolute heck of it, you know, that kind of thing.

983
00:59:11.680 --> 00:59:18.240
And so it's, it, you, the, the more that you practice seeing God, the more that you will

984
00:59:18.240 --> 00:59:23.200
see him because in a manner of speaking, it's not practice. It's like you're stepping out.

985
00:59:23.200 --> 00:59:29.440
You're choosing that. God really is who he says that he is. So you expect to find him. So just

986
00:59:29.440 --> 00:59:36.640
like what Tammy and I were talking about before is you seek him. God will reveal himself. So what

987
00:59:36.640 --> 00:59:44.560
you're watching for all day is how has God revealed himself? Where have I seen him?

988
00:59:44.560 --> 00:59:52.240
Where did he pop in? How did he show up? Not where did I find him? You know, because again,

989
00:59:52.240 --> 00:59:57.760
that focus is on us thinking that there's some effort involved or something. It's no, no, no.

990
00:59:57.760 --> 00:59:59.840
How did God reveal? How did God

991
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:04.640
or whatever, and we'll find that all kinds of aspects of our lives that we thought were

992
01:00:04.640 --> 01:00:15.760
either mundane, or were, or, or were, and even that were we thought were Satan, or we

993
01:00:15.760 --> 01:00:21.400
thought were, I don't know, just our own stupidity or whatever.

994
01:00:21.400 --> 01:00:26.080
A lot of it will discover this, that those things are not all of them, but that a lot

995
01:00:26.080 --> 01:00:32.960
of them actually are God, God loving on us, God answering our prayer, God moving things

996
01:00:32.960 --> 01:00:40.360
on our behalf, God giving us new direction, new insight, new revelation, and then it's

997
01:00:40.360 --> 01:00:47.920
always towards more love, more freedom, Him covering us in provision and protection.

998
01:00:47.920 --> 01:00:51.760
So anyway, I was excited to hear that y'all are doing it because that's something that

999
01:00:51.760 --> 01:00:58.160
I've really wanted to make sure I help everyone in the Rest Intensive focus on, and it should

1000
01:00:58.160 --> 01:01:01.560
be, I've just become, as over time, I've become more and more aware that it's something I

1001
01:01:01.560 --> 01:01:07.880
really need to, that it's a tone I need to help set, is not what we're trying to escape

1002
01:01:07.880 --> 01:01:15.220
from and not what God gives us freedom from, but what God gives us freedom to, is just,

1003
01:01:15.220 --> 01:01:23.460
in other words, to always be focused on what is the good that He is, the love and the freedom

1004
01:01:23.460 --> 01:01:34.200
that we were saved into, that's what I'm trying to say, not, oh, how can I feel better?

1005
01:01:34.200 --> 01:01:36.220
How can I not feel like this?

1006
01:01:36.220 --> 01:01:38.620
How can God just take it away?

1007
01:01:38.620 --> 01:01:43.900
That, if that needs to be our motivation for a while, because it's where we are, that's

1008
01:01:43.900 --> 01:01:50.680
fine, but especially over the time that we have the Rest Intensive, that should definitely

1009
01:01:50.680 --> 01:01:52.860
not be the focus for that long.

1010
01:01:52.860 --> 01:01:58.780
It's unhealthy, and it's not, here's a really big point, it's not sustainable to keep you

1011
01:01:58.780 --> 01:02:00.240
going.

1012
01:02:00.240 --> 01:02:09.180
You cannot live life sustainably and be motivated by what you're trying to escape.

1013
01:02:09.180 --> 01:02:10.180
You can't do it.

1014
01:02:10.180 --> 01:02:16.420
You have to be going towards hope and towards a dream, that is sustainable motivation to

1015
01:02:16.420 --> 01:02:26.580
move forward, not constantly trying to leave something and, quote, unquote, get better.

1016
01:02:26.580 --> 01:02:30.300
That just burns you out, that's where burnout comes.

1017
01:02:30.300 --> 01:02:37.340
Burnout comes from good people just, or from people trying to do good, that's exhausting.

1018
01:02:37.500 --> 01:02:43.260
So anyway, I was so very excited to hear all of these things that y'all had decided for

1019
01:02:43.260 --> 01:02:46.580
yourselves that you were looking for between you and God.

1020
01:02:46.580 --> 01:02:48.380
God, where are you?

1021
01:02:48.380 --> 01:02:53.420
Loved what you said, Karen, you said, it's become less about the outcome and more about

1022
01:02:53.420 --> 01:02:55.620
me and God and what we're doing.

1023
01:02:55.620 --> 01:02:56.620
Exactly.

1024
01:02:56.620 --> 01:02:59.100
Can I, can I copyright that?

1025
01:02:59.100 --> 01:03:00.100
I'm just kidding.

1026
01:03:00.100 --> 01:03:01.100
Yeah.

1027
01:03:01.100 --> 01:03:02.100
Exactly.

1028
01:03:02.100 --> 01:03:03.100
Yeah.

1029
01:03:03.100 --> 01:03:04.100
I appreciate it.

1030
01:03:04.100 --> 01:03:05.100
I was just joking.

1031
01:03:05.100 --> 01:03:06.100
It's excellent.

1032
01:03:06.140 --> 01:03:08.140
Such a great way to phrase that.

1033
01:03:08.140 --> 01:03:10.140
Did I say it that way?

1034
01:03:10.140 --> 01:03:11.140
Did I say that?

1035
01:03:11.140 --> 01:03:12.140
Well, something like that.

1036
01:03:12.140 --> 01:03:13.140
Yeah.

1037
01:03:13.140 --> 01:03:14.140
Something like that.

1038
01:03:14.140 --> 01:03:15.140
Yeah.

1039
01:03:15.140 --> 01:03:18.020
I didn't, I may not have done it justice with the exact, with the exact phrasing, but it

1040
01:03:18.020 --> 01:03:19.020
was something like that.

1041
01:03:19.020 --> 01:03:25.540
You know, it's become less about the outcome and more about what me and God are doing together

1042
01:03:25.540 --> 01:03:31.940
and who he is and, you know, just our journey and you were saying that kind of a thing.

1043
01:03:31.940 --> 01:03:32.940
Excellent.

1044
01:03:32.940 --> 01:03:36.660
And that's exactly the point is to let go of our lifestyle.

1045
01:03:36.660 --> 01:03:37.660
Remember the ultimate choice.

1046
01:03:37.660 --> 01:03:43.180
Cause basically you were afraid, rephrasing the ultimate choice, God, I, I, I released

1047
01:03:43.180 --> 01:03:46.340
my outcome and I, and I let go of my outcome.

1048
01:03:46.340 --> 01:03:48.820
I no longer hold you responsible for my outcome.

1049
01:03:48.820 --> 01:03:50.860
And instead, God, I choose you.

1050
01:03:50.860 --> 01:03:53.640
I no longer choose my lifestyle.

1051
01:03:53.640 --> 01:03:55.300
I no longer choose my outcome.

1052
01:03:55.300 --> 01:03:57.340
I choose you.

1053
01:03:57.340 --> 01:04:00.940
So when that's what you're doing, you're releasing the outcome and choosing God.

1054
01:04:00.940 --> 01:04:01.940
That's it.

1055
01:04:01.940 --> 01:04:02.940
Wow.

1056
01:04:02.940 --> 01:04:12.140
I can get excited to choose my lifestyle or my outcome.

1057
01:04:12.140 --> 01:04:13.140
Just choose him.

1058
01:04:13.140 --> 01:04:14.140
Yes.

1059
01:04:14.140 --> 01:04:15.140
That's so good.

1060
01:04:15.140 --> 01:04:16.140
Yeah.

1061
01:04:16.140 --> 01:04:19.260
You need to, you need to like, we need to, you need to coin that or something.

1062
01:04:19.260 --> 01:04:20.260
There you go.

1063
01:04:20.260 --> 01:04:21.260
Put it on a t-shirt.

1064
01:04:21.260 --> 01:04:22.260
Yeah.

1065
01:04:22.260 --> 01:04:23.260
Put it on a t-shirt.

1066
01:04:23.260 --> 01:04:27.980
I would say just, just instead of, instead of just do it, just choose him.

1067
01:04:27.980 --> 01:04:28.980
That's right.

1068
01:04:28.980 --> 01:04:29.980
Just choose him.

1069
01:04:29.980 --> 01:04:30.980
Exactly.

1070
01:04:31.020 --> 01:04:36.060
I was, I was visiting with a lady from England the other day and I don't know what part of

1071
01:04:36.060 --> 01:04:37.060
it was.

1072
01:04:37.060 --> 01:04:43.260
She was just telling that about, and then part of it was she, part of it was, I don't

1073
01:04:43.260 --> 01:04:44.260
know.

1074
01:04:44.260 --> 01:04:45.940
I just started saying these things in really short sentences.

1075
01:04:45.940 --> 01:04:50.500
I don't know whatever it was she, I was, I was doing some transformation sessions with

1076
01:04:50.500 --> 01:04:51.500
her.

1077
01:04:51.500 --> 01:05:00.020
And with certain people, my transformation session had, uh, uh, have been.

1078
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:03.920
Some certain transformations sessions to certain people have been very long.

1079
01:05:04.020 --> 01:05:08.500
It depends on, on the purpose and how much time, you know, anyway.

1080
01:05:08.780 --> 01:05:12.100
So with her, I think at one of them, I think our first one was like four and a

1081
01:05:12.100 --> 01:05:13.500
half hours or something like that.

1082
01:05:13.940 --> 01:05:14.400
Anyway.

1083
01:05:14.400 --> 01:05:18.140
So during that one, and during the next one, she kept saying, Ashley,

1084
01:05:18.140 --> 01:05:19.380
you should put that on a t-shirt.

1085
01:05:19.780 --> 01:05:21.900
And I say something else, actually, that's actually, actually

1086
01:05:21.900 --> 01:05:23.220
should have your whole life.

1087
01:05:23.740 --> 01:05:25.660
And I'm going, what am I saying?

1088
01:05:25.660 --> 01:05:29.960
But anyway, apparently to her, it sounded really quippy and pithy.

1089
01:05:29.960 --> 01:05:34.240
And I'm like, in my mind, I'm going, no, there's too much background in order

1090
01:05:34.240 --> 01:05:37.300
to understand the pithy statement that I don't think that staying alone.

1091
01:05:37.300 --> 01:05:40.940
Anyway, but I was like, Hey, that's kind of cool.

1092
01:05:41.020 --> 01:05:42.480
Anyway, that's what it reminded me of Karen.

1093
01:05:42.480 --> 01:05:44.580
When you were talking about, we should put that, we should, you

1094
01:05:44.580 --> 01:05:46.060
know, put it on a t-shirt.

1095
01:05:46.700 --> 01:05:47.320
That's good.

1096
01:05:47.320 --> 01:05:47.580
Yeah.

1097
01:05:47.600 --> 01:05:49.720
Did you say you need to look up that jewelry company?

1098
01:05:50.260 --> 01:05:50.820
Yes.

1099
01:05:51.220 --> 01:05:52.840
I just, I'm going to put it in chat.

1100
01:05:52.860 --> 01:05:55.020
Mariana M-A-R-I-A-N-A.

1101
01:05:55.340 --> 01:05:58.140
I'm glad you did because that is not how I spelled it in my head.

1102
01:05:58.820 --> 01:05:59.540
I think that's it.

1103
01:05:59.580 --> 01:06:00.780
I think that's how you spell it.

1104
01:06:00.820 --> 01:06:03.100
And I went and grabbed another, here's one more bracelet.

1105
01:06:03.820 --> 01:06:04.980
That's just, and a ring.

1106
01:06:05.760 --> 01:06:06.380
Oh, wow.

1107
01:06:06.620 --> 01:06:07.300
Yeah.

1108
01:06:07.300 --> 01:06:09.860
I see people, you know, I've seen Karen in person.

1109
01:06:09.860 --> 01:06:13.100
She always dresses really nice and put together and I've

1110
01:06:13.100 --> 01:06:14.180
always liked her jewelry.

1111
01:06:14.180 --> 01:06:17.700
So I've probably seen some of those pieces in real life.

1112
01:06:18.540 --> 01:06:19.860
And, and it's not very expensive.

1113
01:06:19.860 --> 01:06:20.740
That's the neat part.

1114
01:06:22.260 --> 01:06:24.240
It's not very, here's another one.

1115
01:06:24.760 --> 01:06:25.160
Oh, wow.

1116
01:06:25.160 --> 01:06:27.200
But it's not, it's not very expensive.

1117
01:06:27.520 --> 01:06:28.480
Oh, that's pretty.

1118
01:06:28.560 --> 01:06:28.960
Yeah.

1119
01:06:29.200 --> 01:06:33.200
And this, and this ring had, um, Oh, lots of bling.

1120
01:06:33.200 --> 01:06:33.920
See, I like that.

1121
01:06:33.920 --> 01:06:34.760
Lots of bling.

1122
01:06:36.400 --> 01:06:37.720
I've got too much of it.

1123
01:06:38.200 --> 01:06:39.120
I got too much of it.

1124
01:06:39.120 --> 01:06:40.320
Sometimes I give it away.

1125
01:06:41.280 --> 01:06:45.480
Well, I looked in there and I went, what have I been doing?

1126
01:06:46.960 --> 01:06:48.600
So sometimes I just give some away.

1127
01:06:50.120 --> 01:06:50.280
Yeah.

1128
01:06:50.280 --> 01:06:53.040
Well, I could have to look it up myself.

1129
01:06:54.040 --> 01:06:56.600
My girlfriend calls me and goes, Hey, they're having a trunk,

1130
01:06:56.640 --> 01:06:57.640
Mariana trunk show.

1131
01:06:57.640 --> 01:06:58.080
You want to go?

1132
01:06:58.080 --> 01:06:59.120
And I'm like, yeah, sure.

1133
01:06:59.120 --> 01:07:00.280
And I'm like, what am I doing?

1134
01:07:01.280 --> 01:07:03.880
But yeah, they usually have one store.

1135
01:07:04.640 --> 01:07:04.880
Yeah.

1136
01:07:04.920 --> 01:07:08.000
What I said, window shopping, right?

1137
01:07:08.280 --> 01:07:10.040
They have one store per zip code.

1138
01:07:10.040 --> 01:07:12.120
So they kind of keep it down.

1139
01:07:12.120 --> 01:07:13.480
So you just look at Mariana.

1140
01:07:13.920 --> 01:07:14.280
Yeah.

1141
01:07:14.320 --> 01:07:15.200
Or online.

1142
01:07:15.400 --> 01:07:18.720
You can find it online, but there's all to check it out.

1143
01:07:18.720 --> 01:07:19.240
Thank you.

1144
01:07:19.280 --> 01:07:19.920
It's fun.

1145
01:07:20.000 --> 01:07:20.560
It's fun.

1146
01:07:21.280 --> 01:07:21.800
That's fun.

1147
01:07:21.880 --> 01:07:22.760
You have to look at it.

1148
01:07:23.520 --> 01:07:24.040
Yeah.

1149
01:07:24.520 --> 01:07:27.200
Well, it's good to see everybody.

1150
01:07:27.200 --> 01:07:32.080
And so we're going to have our last fireside chat on Thursday.

1151
01:07:32.480 --> 01:07:35.040
Um, I will be at a conference all day Thursday.

1152
01:07:35.040 --> 01:07:40.000
And so, um, I think I'll miss the last session or part of the last

1153
01:07:40.000 --> 01:07:42.680
session for, uh, our last fireside chat.

1154
01:07:43.000 --> 01:07:46.560
So I'll look forward to getting to see everybody again, Thursday night.

1155
01:07:47.120 --> 01:07:49.160
And, uh, trying to think what else?

1156
01:07:49.200 --> 01:07:55.160
Oh, um, I have posted, I'm trying to remember what I haven't told her yet.

1157
01:07:55.160 --> 01:08:00.920
So I posted at least one new supportive teaching on, you know, the rest

1158
01:08:00.920 --> 01:08:01.960
retreat and supportive teachings.

1159
01:08:01.960 --> 01:08:03.520
I've posted at least one more.

1160
01:08:04.040 --> 01:08:04.920
Oh, shoot.

1161
01:08:05.440 --> 01:08:08.800
There's, there was something that I was, I was going to post another couple of

1162
01:08:08.800 --> 01:08:10.560
things about how to make friends and rest.

1163
01:08:10.560 --> 01:08:11.480
I forgot about that.

1164
01:08:11.480 --> 01:08:13.080
I'll try to do that as soon as I get off.

1165
01:08:13.600 --> 01:08:20.399
Um, but I did one about healing, um, or how to approach the spirit, soul and body.

1166
01:08:20.880 --> 01:08:25.120
Um, and it's just basically how to talk to your spirit, your soul, your body.

1167
01:08:25.120 --> 01:08:29.160
And I think in there, maybe I just, I just addressed the soul and body, but

1168
01:08:29.160 --> 01:08:33.000
you can kind of say this, um, talk to the spirit, um, you know, um, except

1169
01:08:33.000 --> 01:08:37.200
from the perspective to the spirit, your, your talk to your spirit, you're

1170
01:08:37.200 --> 01:08:40.160
talking as if like, it's already perfect.

1171
01:08:40.479 --> 01:08:45.680
And just asking it, you know, to commune with into, uh, engage with, uh, you

1172
01:08:45.680 --> 01:08:48.640
know, the spirit of wisdom, spirit of understanding in order to heal certain

1173
01:08:48.640 --> 01:08:50.240
wounds in order to whatever.

1174
01:08:50.560 --> 01:08:53.920
Um, and, uh, who was I talking to?

1175
01:08:54.080 --> 01:08:58.080
Was it you, Tammy, or was it somebody else that mentioned that they had gone

1176
01:08:58.080 --> 01:09:02.680
in and looked at some of the old teachings and found, you know, like

1177
01:09:02.680 --> 01:09:04.359
the kitchen series, maybe.

1178
01:09:04.720 --> 01:09:04.920
Yeah.

1179
01:09:04.920 --> 01:09:08.439
I think it was that I think it was the original ones about the vision that I

1180
01:09:08.479 --> 01:09:13.240
saw when I was standing in, in, um, in my bathroom, this bathroom right over

1181
01:09:13.240 --> 01:09:15.960
here, actually, because again, I was here a few years ago when God was

1182
01:09:15.960 --> 01:09:16.760
teaching all these things.

1183
01:09:17.240 --> 01:09:21.920
And, um, and I saw that I saw a spirit soul and body of the same person

1184
01:09:22.200 --> 01:09:23.600
and I saw how they interacted.

1185
01:09:23.600 --> 01:09:25.640
So anyway, that's how it let me have a word.

1186
01:09:25.640 --> 01:09:29.760
Let me know, Hey, Ashley, you can, there's these different aspects of you

1187
01:09:29.760 --> 01:09:34.040
that all have particular functions and roles and in a manner of speaking, a

1188
01:09:34.040 --> 01:09:38.600
hierarchy and, um, because they're all the soul, the spirit knows what to do.

1189
01:09:38.600 --> 01:09:41.800
And it teaches the soul because the spirit is getting its knowledge and

1190
01:09:41.800 --> 01:09:45.120
wisdom from learning from the Lord and from the spirit of wisdom, knowledge,

1191
01:09:45.120 --> 01:09:47.840
understanding, and all of those other seven spirits of God.

1192
01:09:48.560 --> 01:09:55.200
And, um, so anyway, um, uh, then, um, uh, then Annette had asked me, Hey, you

1193
01:09:55.200 --> 01:09:58.720
had mentioned that you have written up a little something about as an example of

1194
01:09:58.720 --> 01:09:59.960
how to talk.

1195
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:07.760
to your spirit, soul, and body. Could you post that? So I posted that. Um, and I guess that is

1196
01:10:07.760 --> 01:10:13.120
it. So anyway, um, but it's good to see all of you and I will see you Thursday.

1197
01:10:14.400 --> 01:10:20.160
Can I say one quick thing? Because I'm supposed to be at that conference Thursday with yours,

1198
01:10:20.160 --> 01:10:26.560
truly. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if you see his picture at all. Oh yes. Just barely. Yeah.

1199
01:10:26.560 --> 01:10:32.800
Barely. Yeah. He's the one that married you, right? Yes. Yeah. Okay. So, so I got to choose

1200
01:10:32.800 --> 01:10:38.640
whether to go to that meeting or be at this because it starts that night. Whatever you,

1201
01:10:38.640 --> 01:10:43.760
oh, that's right. I assumed that it would. And I think he's speaking that night. I think I heard

1202
01:10:43.760 --> 01:10:50.400
that he is in the mornings and the evenings you want to do is totally up to you, whatever you

1203
01:10:50.400 --> 01:10:54.480
want to do. I don't know if they have a recording of that, you know, we have a recording of this.

1204
01:10:55.200 --> 01:11:02.320
So yeah, I'll find out the same thing as live, but you get to whatever you'd like to do. Yeah.

1205
01:11:02.320 --> 01:11:08.320
I'm still the, the Lord will show me what to do, but that's right. And then, um, then will you let

1206
01:11:08.320 --> 01:11:14.560
us know when you're going to post the, uh, times for next week for the session? Yes. Maybe shoot,

1207
01:11:14.560 --> 01:11:20.400
shoot us. Okay. Yeah. I haven't yet because my husband and I are still deciding if we're

1208
01:11:20.400 --> 01:11:25.280
going to travel for a, for a wedding all the way back in South Carolina. So we're still not sure.

1209
01:11:25.840 --> 01:11:30.640
So that's why not just y'all, but other people's plans are being held in the air,

1210
01:11:30.640 --> 01:11:36.240
waiting for us to decide. So are we going and driving 17 hours there and going to the wedding,

1211
01:11:36.240 --> 01:11:40.320
possibly seeing Etienne in Charlotte? Cause that's where he's going to be after Charlotte,

1212
01:11:40.320 --> 01:11:46.240
South Carolina, after he finishes this conference and then, um, and driving 17 hours back. We're

1213
01:11:46.240 --> 01:11:52.480
not sure. So anyway, but, um, okay. Yeah. But yeah, I will let you, you'll let y'all know as

1214
01:11:52.480 --> 01:11:58.880
soon as, um, as soon as that's open to be able to schedule that. Yeah. Okay. All right. Okay.

1215
01:11:58.880 --> 01:12:04.960
We all have a good night. Okay. Even if I, even if I go to that meeting, I'll probably pop on.

1216
01:12:05.520 --> 01:12:10.800
Okay. I'll probably, I'll have to go. I'll have to go back in Greg's office or something and pop on.

1217
01:12:11.520 --> 01:12:16.720
Yeah. One time, Linda, um, you know, by the way, Linda is the one who runs the Cedar Creek

1218
01:12:16.720 --> 01:12:21.280
everyone. Um, so by the way, Linda, one time was doing a party or whatever. And I don't remember

1219
01:12:21.280 --> 01:12:25.440
what kind of celebration it was, but some kind of a party. And she popped into the meeting,

1220
01:12:25.440 --> 01:12:29.440
leaving the party and goes, it went into the little prayer room, you know, that's right.

1221
01:12:29.440 --> 01:12:34.240
It by the sanctuary with it, with the baby room where the people with like babies that need to

1222
01:12:34.240 --> 01:12:39.040
like pull away for a little bit. She popped in there. It's like, I know where you are. She said,

1223
01:12:39.040 --> 01:12:43.040
yes, we're in the middle of a party. And I came away to be able to join the meeting.

1224
01:12:46.480 --> 01:12:52.240
Even if I'm there, you guys, I'll, I'll, uh, pull away. I can pull away. Okay. Well,

1225
01:12:52.240 --> 01:12:57.120
we'll look forward to getting to see you however long it is. Okay. Thank you all.

1226
01:12:57.680 --> 01:13:01.920
I'll see y'all later. Bye. Okay. Bye.