All right, we have Gwen and Carla and Chantel, Ruth, Emily,
awesome little crew here this morning, this afternoon.
All right, so welcome to the first heart check-in
for this week.
I'm gonna be with you this week and next week
as Bethany is on vacation
and we want her to have that vacation,
so that's fun, right?
That's a good time.
Actually, I'm the OG of this anyway
because I used to be the only person doing heart check-ins
before we got a great team working with us and for us
and so you are going to get to coach
with the person who created the heart work
and so if you have any questions at all about heart work,
about what you're experiencing, anything, everything,
I am here to answer those questions
for you guys this week, all right?
So I have your check-ins.
If you, a little housekeeping, every single week on Sunday,
there is a post that goes up whatever phase you're in.
If you're in phase one, it's there.
If you're in phase two, phase three,
as you move forward in the program,
there will always be a post that goes up on Sundays
that just says, hey, how you doing?
We call it our roll call post.
How are you doing?
What are you working on?
Where are you stuck?
And you wanna make sure that you look for that post
every week and that you participate in that post
and the reason is this,
because based on what you put in that post,
that is how we format our coaching sessions for that week.
What are people struggling with?
Where are they stuck?
What kind of wins are they getting?
What kind of wins do we want to see them getting?
And that is how we structure what we're gonna talk about
and then of course, if you're here live
and then you get to ask questions
that maybe you didn't put in the roll call post
but for all of you that have to watch and replay
because you're just not available
at the times of the live coachings,
you wanna definitely make sure
that you are posting in that roll call, right?
Awesome.
So we're just thankful God to be here together today
and Holy Spirit, we ask that you would lead us
into the biggest revelations and breakthroughs
in Jesus name.
All right, so I'm looking through the phase one
roll call posts right now
and it looks like a lot of people
are in the forgiveness stage
and maybe have been there for a minute
because that is where they kind of ran out of steam.
And there is a reason why we allow that
to have its own week forgiveness just in general
and that's because a lot of people have a lot of things
that they need to unpack in that area.
Forgiving God, we don't think about that one.
Forgiving God, forgiving ourselves, forgiving others,
forgiving our own scenarios and situations
and memories that are attached to trauma
that as we unpack it, we realize that there's a lot
of forgiveness that has to happen there.
A releasing of people from their bad behaviors
and even their sin against us
and maybe our sin against other people.
Forgiving that, stepping into that finished work
of the cross and yesterday was Easter.
And so yesterday was our celebration of the remembrance
that Jesus died for us and as us
so that we don't have to live in our mess.
We don't have to live in the bed that we made.
We don't have to live in the bed
that other people made for us to sleep in.
We don't have to sleep in any of those beds.
We can sleep in the bed that Jesus made for us on the cross
and that is a bed of righteousness, right standing with God.
That is a bed of being heirs and joint heirs of Christ.
That is a bed of vindication.
That is a bed of purification and sanctification.
That is a bed of justification.
That is a bed of being fully vindicated
of any and all things that you have done
and that has been done to you.
If we wanna live that way, we can.
Okay, last night, my son who is 28,
we were traveling back from a family birthday party
in Florida and my son who's 28 gonna be 29 this year
said, mom, let me ask you a question.
He said, if you do something that you know is wrong
and you just decide to do it anyway,
he said, what does that say about you as a person?
And my son is a beautiful faith-filled Jesus follower
but remember you guys, we all have areas where we trip.
We all have areas where we struggle.
We all have areas where we have temptations.
The word of God tells us that he makes a way of escape
in those areas where we have weakness
and we feel tempted to do something
that is not worthy of us.
And so simply the answer that I gave my son is that.
First of all, you have to understand that all sin and I don't know why I'm having this conversation with you guys, except that someone here needs to hear this and possibly replay people are the people that need to hear it as well.
When it comes to sin, I want you to reframe sin, your sin and other people's sin against you. I want you to reframe it by giving it a new kind of definition.
The definition of sin, this is what God taught me, is anything and everything that we do to try to fulfill a God-given need in our own strength.
That's what sin is.
Okay.
So it will cause us to go do unworthy things trying to get something that only can be given to us by God.
Think about it. We have a God-given need for intimacy, right? For emotional and even physical intimacy.
That sex drive that you have is a gift from God.
But a lot of people will try to fulfill it in ways that cause a sin-shame cycle.
Instead of just bringing it to God and saying, hey, I didn't ask for this, but you gave it to me.
And so I know you must also have a plan to satisfy it.
And so I need to get in that plan.
And you need to show me what that plan looks like.
Because right now, this gift is destroying me.
As I try to feed it.
Right? So there's just one example.
We all have, we all need community.
We all have the God-given need for others.
And a lot of us will beg, borrow and steal to have people in our lives.
We won't be ourselves.
We'll let people, you know, we'll enable behaviors that are sinful towards us.
And us towards them.
All different types of things just to have people in our lives.
That's not God's design to fulfill that need.
That God-shaped hole that we have for people.
That God-shaped, you have lots of God-shaped holes.
That God-shaped hole for, to not be alone, isn't just filled by him.
That's where we've got it all messed up.
Yes, we're whole in Christ.
Because we're healed in the area of identity.
But we still need to be completed in relationship.
And a lot of us in marriage, that's why we're here.
And then healed in family.
And so, you know, it's important that we understand that we can't fill that God-given need for people with God.
He is not a people.
And if all we needed was God, then Adam could have just been so low in the garden.
So these are all places, and of course finances, you know, people will, I was at the airport yesterday, it was packed.
I was coming back from a family party in Easter with my mom's husband that she was married to when she passed away.
And their son, who is my brother.
And just giving them family, giving them community.
Because since she's passed away, they're all by themselves.
And they're raising my niece and nephew, who are now just turning 18 on Friday.
And so going over there to be with them.
And the airports were packed with people.
Show me the recession.
I mean, packed with people.
But the problem is, is that a lot of those people are probably there on borrowed money.
Meaning that they ran up their credit card to do whatever it is that they were doing for spring break, right?
And you guys, that's a bad habit to get into.
Because when we get into that habit, it's never satisfied, is it?
You have to pay Peter, you have to rob Peter to pay Paul, so to speak.
And that creates a cycle in our lives that can become really sinful.
And so it's important that we understand it can become really orphan-tendencied.
And so we don't want that.
We also do know that we want to have those experiences.
And I believe God wants us to have those experiences.
Those experiences of rest.
Those experiences of reset.
But we need to come to him and say, hey, what is the righteous way of obtaining this?
Because the job that I have barely meets my everyday basic needs.
And so there's no room for extra here.
And I believe that that's when God will invite us.
And that's what this hard work process is about.
And some of you, raise your hand if you're in week five.
I have several that are about to graduate into phase two.
You're in week five.
And that's the real you phase.
That's where desires and dreams need to start coming alive of what you could do with your life.
one and only life that's more than what you're doing now.
And how that will make provision,
and I believe legacy wealth for you and your family, right?
Are you gonna be a multimillionaire?
No, I'm not saying that,
but what I'm saying is have legacy wealth for your family,
being able to do what it is that you desire to do
when you want to do it.
That's really a life of freedom, right?
Being able to serve others in whatever vocation
and profession that you're called to,
that you also love and enjoy.
And then that's what you get in exchange for that,
being enough for you to have those times of rest
and recreation with your family.
If you get invited to something and you really wanna go,
that was my only prayer.
Back in that super broke days, my only prayer was,
hey God, when I get invited to do something,
whether it was minister somewhere,
it didn't matter what it was,
I said, I wanna be able to say yes.
If there's a yes in my heart,
I wanna be able to say yes without having to worry about
how am I gonna make that happen?
How am I gonna make that happen?
And so that was my main prayer.
My main prayer was I wanna be able to do the things
that I need to do without going into a tailspin
trying to figure out how to financially afford it.
And God's been true to that prayer.
If you want to steal that prayer, go ahead.
It's yours, I give it to you.
Because a lot of times we pray for things
that aren't the right prayer.
And then we get really confused
and we get overwhelmed with those prayers.
Instead of just being like, hey, you know what God,
I just wanna be able to go and do what it is
that I need to go and do without having to kill myself
trying to make it happen financially, whatever that is.
There are times and seasons in life, friends,
where we learn how to trust God in the very lean times
where you get a flat tire
and you're just gonna have to believe in faith
that God's gonna take care of it.
There are definitely seasons of that.
And I lived many decades of that.
But then there comes a time
when I believe you mature out of that.
And yeah, you've trusted God in those times.
And so when he could trust you with little
and what you could only receive by faith,
now what does the Bible say?
It says that he makes you a steward over more, right?
And so a lot of us need to graduate from that place
where we're living by faith to that place
where we now have matured to a place
where God can trust us with more
so that we can be blessed to be a blessing.
Who would wanna graduate into that space?
Okay.
And so that's going to come with favor.
That's how it's gonna happen.
It's gonna come with ideas.
It's gonna come with risk.
You're gonna have to step out
and maybe do some things
that you didn't think about doing before.
But God's gonna, it's gonna come with an invitation.
God's gonna invite you.
Into some new spaces, new places,
with new people, doing new things.
And it's gonna feel uncomfortable at first,
kind of like new clothes.
You know, you like the outfit when you bought it,
but it's a little scratchy.
It's a little itchy.
Maybe it doesn't fit all that great.
Because you know, if you're like me,
you're like, it's gonna fit great
when I lose that extra 10 pounds.
That's horrible.
Why do we do that to ourselves?
It's so wrong.
I can honestly say that I have very little things,
very little clothes that just fit my right now body.
They're all for my future body.
I'm a very future focused person.
I always have been since I was a kid.
And so I'm always living future to present,
future to present, which is a gift.
And it's a good thing.
It caused me to be a visionary.
But at the same time,
it's not always great for my wardrobe.
Sometimes it feels like I might be punishing myself
until I'm to some sort of future state of perfection.
And we don't want that.
So if you fall into that category,
make sure that you're not doing that to yourself.
You should always have something
that you feel good in right now.
Right, especially all of you that are headed into phase two
and into your dating season, right?
Where you're gonna be going out and meeting new people
and looking cute and doing your thing, right?
So it sounds like a lot of you are in the forgiveness.
According to this, a lot of you also have things coming up
from the past, traumas that you weren't expecting,
traumas that you're like, wow, I thought I was over this.
Where did this come from?
And that happens a lot because healing comes in layers.
It doesn't mean that you're still under it. You could be over it, but there's a higher level of
over it. And you're getting there and you're getting there. So something comes up like that,
like some of you are mentioning in your comments, go ahead and just put it before the Lord and say,
Hey, you know, I forgave myself. I forgave others. Maybe you even had to forgive God
because you're mad at him because he didn't do what you thought he was going to do.
He didn't come through the way that you thought he was going to come through
what you thought was going to happen. If you believed and prayed on, it didn't happen,
whatever that looks like. But then you're bringing that to him and saying,
but when I think about this thing, when it still comes up, there's still pain there.
There's still a fence there, right? I still feel, I still feel negative emotions. That's
how you can tell that there's a heart wound. That's not fully healed. Cause when you think
of that scenario, that situation, that memory, there's still some sort of negativity
in your heart attached to it. I will tell you guys, I have been through a lot of fires with
gasoline underwear on. I have a lot of mugs and a lot of trauma t-shirts. Okay. A lot, a lot,
a lot. But I will tell you that a lot of those things, most of those things, when for some
reason they come up, like maybe I'm coaching and then I'm reminded, Oh, Hey, yeah, that happened
to me too. Um, it almost seems like it happened to someone else. And it's not because I've
disassociated is because there is no guile in me anymore in that situation. Nothing.
I'm not attached to it in that way. And in fact, if I'm ministering about it and I begin to weep
over it, I'm weeping over the broken hearts that can relate to it. It doesn't really have anything
to do with me anymore. And you can get to that place as well. I don't care what it is. I mean,
I've been through some heinous stuff and so have you. And so you might think I might, I'm never
going to feel that way about X, Y, Z. Yeah, you will. If you allow healing and I, what I call
grace, truth, and time to have its way in your life. Okay. So if you're not there yet, that's
fine. You will get there. One of the places where I'm not there yet is the death of my mother.
I still, when those, when those memories of being in the ICU and that stuff is comes up,
it's not as bad as it was four years ago. I'm definitely healing, but there's definitely still
some things attached to that, that caused me a lot of pain in my heart still. All right.
Got some praise reports here, praise reports of forgiveness,
praise reports of breakthrough, some wins, definitely.
People leaning into Holy spirit more than they ever have people trusting God more than they
ever have. Consistency is coming. That is the key to success. Friends is consistency,
continuing to show up. Today's the first day of April, and we have a whole brand new,
beautiful month in front of us where we can ask God to help us to show up consistently.
Cause what happens is a lot of us, we get going and we're getting at a good pace and then some
crosswind will just blow us off track. You know, whether we got a cold or something happened at
work or something massively got triggered. And then we were flat on our back for two,
three weeks. And then we're trying to get back into the groove of things.
I want to encourage you that no matter what it is that you have to do, do not stop. You might
only be able to take one little tiny baby step forward, but don't stop. Okay. Don't disappear.
Don't ghost your program. Make sure that you're continuing to attach, continuing to engage
because distraction and, you know, us getting, you know, blown off course to where we're not
consistent, that is what stops the momentum. And so we don't want to do that for sure. All right.
So those are the things that we had on there. So we can go ahead and take questions. Now,
anybody who's here live, not just questions, but anything that you want to share that you
want feedback on, let's go ahead and do that now.
Okay.
You can forgive someone who's not alive.
You can. And even though you never got to say the things that you felt like you needed to say
to them when they were on this earth and they met, that might feel like a big space and a void
in your heart that you can never fully get past. I want to tell you that they can hear you.
All right.
We are not separated by death.
Somebody needs to hear that.
We are not separated by death.
Remember the story that we celebrated yesterday, the resurrection of Jesus.
Jesus didn't stay dead.
He rose again.
He is alive.
And when he resurrected, he took the keys of death and hell.
And that is forever been abolished, right?
Now the only people that are going to experience that kind of second death are people that
choose that.
Everybody else, you know, we have, we all have eternal life, but we're not going to
have to experience the effects of sin and hell unless of course we choose that.
We choose to oppose the finished work of the cross, which is none of us.
And so I want to encourage you and I want you to know that because of that, we are still
connected to the people that have left their bodies.
And so you can receive forgiveness or give it, you can, you can, you can get closure
because closure is just that fancy word for forgiveness.
Not talking about necromancy.
I'm not talking about going to a psychic and have them conjure up your dead aunt or whoever
it is.
I'm talking about the fact that we are all in God.
We are all in the spirit of God and we are all encompassed about by a great cloud of
witnesses.
I have experienced my mother who has passed now for four years being with me still in
this life.
And I'm not talking about some weird new agey stuff.
I'm talking about how God has made it very clear to me that he is with me and that they
all are with me and, um, and cheering us on.
And so lots of peace in that, in understanding you have to remember those people are perfected.
Those that died in Christ, they no longer have any of the heart wounds or traumas or
hangups or blocks or, you know, anything that would keep them from being able to really
truly love, right?
Because God doesn't just have love.
He is love, right?
And they are with God in a way that we have not yet experienced.
And yet, um, so it's important that someone knows that I don't know who that's for, but
you have some things that you need to get off your chest.
You have some things that you want to say.
You feel like that time has passed.
You feel like it's too late.
You feel like, you know, it can't, nothing can be done.
All is lost.
And it's not true.
It isn't.
And I look down here and I saw this book right here.
Imagine heaven near death experiences, God's promises and the exhilarating future that
awaits you by John Burke.
This is a pastor here in my city in Austin, Texas.
I actually know him.
His son spoke at one of the, um, art festivals that I produced back in the day.
His son, Justin, and then John came as well.
And then later on, he wrote this book later on.
My mom passed away and later on, he wrote this book.
It's a New York times bestseller.
All the whole book is just him interviewing people that had near death experiences, meaning
that they died, they physically died, but they were able to be resuscitated or brought
back after a certain amount of time.
But during that time that they were clinically dead, they went to heaven and they experienced
all kinds of things.
And a lot of them experienced very similar things, which I thought was really interesting.
But one of the things that they all experienced was that they, um, they saw their families.
They saw the people that they knew on earth, the people that they loved and the people
that loved them.
And, um, those were the people, those were kind of the welcoming parties for them and,
uh, lots of amazing, amazing things.
And so I just want to let you know that the person that you're grieving and you're grieving
the relationship that you were never able to have with them on earth because of their
brokenness or your brokenness, there's still time.
You have all of eternity to get to know them better in that way.
And to have the relationship that you have dreamed of having, and to even experience
the things that you wish you could have experienced with them on earth.
There's still time.
Okay.
They're not in your past.
They are in your future.
And I hope that comforts somebody today, death of children, parents, siblings, significant
others.
Others, all the things, those stories are not over.
All right.
I feel like Holy Spirit's releasing us from that topic.
So for whoever that was for, that whole segue,
there we are.
And who has some questions?
Carla.
Well, finishing week four was very impactful
on the forgiveness and in your book,
you had us like write down why we need to forgive
and do the prayer, which was very powerful.
So the question that I have is like,
I went to the prayer, it's very emotional.
I don't feel like I got the answer from Holy Spirit
on each of the people that I needed to forgive.
And I feel a release, but I still feel like
there's still some work in my heart
that needs to be completely done on that forgiveness.
Like, I don't know, I'm just like trying to find out,
is there like, what do I need to continue to pray this
until all the forgiveness?
Sometimes the only answer that we get when we ask,
you know, at the end of that prayer for, you know,
that closure is peace.
That's what we feel.
We just feel like you said, a release, you know,
we don't, sometimes we'll get some information
about the why behind the what,
helps us to understand that situation better
and even that person better and their behavior better,
but we don't always get that.
Sometimes we just have peace.
Sometimes we just have a release.
Sometimes we just feel, you know,
that kind of closure, right?
But I will tell you this, Carla,
and that's why we say healed in family,
you know, hurt in relationship, healed in relationship,
hurt in marriage, healed in marriage,
hurt in family, healed in family.
There are some levels of that forgiveness cycle
for people that we won't get to
until we're experiencing the same scenarios
in relationships that we're in.
And so, I think that's a big part of it.
I'm not talking about the same scenarios
in relationships with new people.
I'm not talking about the same trauma scenarios,
but just the same scenarios, like healing scenarios, right?
Then we'll begin to see, hey, you know,
this other person, they couldn't meet me here.
This person, this new person can because they're healthy
and they can meet me here, you know,
but this other person couldn't.
And then what it does is it breeds compassion
for that situation.
Even the most nefarious situations
where the people definitely are operating, you know,
in unworthy behavior, sinful behavior, abusive behavior,
we begin to see the why behind the what.
Because remember friends,
and I know this really offends a lot of people,
but our enemies are never human, right?
If it has a face, you know, if you can hug it, look at it,
it's not your enemy.
So it's important that you understand that
because, you know, even the people
that have greatly misused and abused us
are victims in that situation as well, right?
So they are people who are being held hostage
by some sort of oppression or sometimes possession,
depending on what we're talking about.
And so we need to remember that and understand that.
That's why Jesus said to pray for those, right?
Pray for those that hate us and despitefully use us.
Not just forgive them, but to actually pray for them,
which is a tall order.
It's a very tall order.
And you guys, I don't know if you've caught onto this,
but the reason why Jesus taught the way he taught
was because all of the movements up until Christ
were all based on violence and taking your enemies
and making them pay for being your enemy, basically,
for their opposition.
They were killed, you know,
genocides and all huge, crazy things until Jesus.
Jesus was the only leader that taught
to turn the other cheek, to bless those that curse us.
He taught something different.
And why is that?
Because with any leader, look all through time,
with any leader, any prophet,
any person who started a movement,
it doesn't matter what it is that they stood for,
their followers, after that person's dead and gone,
will go on to commit horrible acts
in the name of that person, right?
Because all of those movements were based on,
you know, vengeance and violence and exclusivity.
And, you know, if you're not with us,
then you're against us.
us. And that's not what Jesus preached. So it's important that
we understand that. And that's why so much out there that is
like, modern Christianity is not, it's not Christianity at
all. It's not Jesus at all. Anytime you guys anything is
laced with hatred towards others, because of even because
of their sin. That's not Jesus. That's not anything that Jesus
preached. That is legalism. That's religion. And religion
is dangerous. Religion is dangerous. Right now in this
earth, there are millions of people that are being killed in
the name of religion. Some religion, everything, everything
that's going on everywhere, you guys is in the name of religion.
And so it's important that we understand that religion. It
ain't holy. It's bad. And so we want to be Christ followers. And
we want to follow in the ways of our Jesus, our Messiah. And if
you do, if you forgot what that is, just go to the New
Testament, go to the Gospels, and just read the letters in red
and just stay there for as long as you need to until you really
get and ask Holy Spirit to not only help you to understand the
words of Jesus, but also the heart of Jesus. It's really
important that we do that. So Carla, you will continue to
heal as you go forward. You don't have to, it doesn't have
to be one and done and friends, it's not going to be one and
done. But the reason why it's important to do those forgiveness
templates in week four is because those are your receipts.
Those are your receipts. When that spirit of condemnation
comes, and it will, because you're always not always going
to feel the right way towards people that have done you wrong.
And if you're there still in your life, they're going to
continue to annoy you if they're still broken and operating in
all of their crap, right. And so you're going to feel like you
didn't forgive them when they continue to irritate you, or
that spirit that's working through them continues to
irritate you. And that's why it's important that you have
that because you can just go back to that and say, Hey,
remember, forgiveness is not a feeling. It doesn't matter how I
feel right now. I know that the divine exchange of heaven, I
release this person from the debts that they owe me and I can
move forward.
Who else?
I have a question.
Can you hear me? Yeah, Karen. Hi. Okay. Sorry. Hi. Yeah, I
have a quick question. After I'm done with Lesson Two, and I'm
moving on to three. And I've been attending a long time Bible
study with a couple of women were real close and suddenly, at
the last Bible study, things, things got uncomfortable. They
were reacting to something that I said, that made them
uncomfortable, I guess. And there was a lot of aminosity.
And I asked the Lord to unpack it when I got home, because I
wanted his perspective. And he basically said, it's time to
move on from that Bible study. And so I'm at peace with that.
Could you share with us what you said that triggered them so
much? Do you know what it was?
Oh, yeah. So I had read a book called the unseen realm. And I
we were going through Ezra, and I was just talking, I was just
inputting some of the information I read in the book.
And they said, they didn't care for the input, because it wasn't
in the Bible, it was they said it was a commentary or someone's
opinion. And so they're uncomfortable with it. And they
became kind of upset about it. And so I was reading the book,
and I was kind of upset about it. And so, so that's what
happened.
Do you got it? You got a little too woo woo for them? Is that
what we're saying?
I I'm not sure. They're just
spiritual kind of things. The unseen realm. I'm assuming
you're talking about the spiritual realm.
Correct. Yeah, yeah. Correct. Yeah.
So they felt more comfortable with what they can read in the
Bible and what it explains. And we're talking about something
maybe a little bit more, you know, not necessarily written in
the Bible, but maybe implied.
Yeah, so the book was written with the intent to explain the
Bible from a Jewish perspective and how they would read the
Bible when it was written. And so we read it, we read it
differently, because we don't have that perspective. So
anyway, that that's all of us.
Let's talk about what Karen is experiencing right now, because
this is a natural part of growth. Okay, so let's talk
about it. And I think it's important. So
and thank you for your question.
So now we can talk about this.
So we can't stay anywhere forever, right?
We're not gonna stay anywhere forever
because we want to continue to grow.
That being said, there are people that try to cut
and run before growth happens.
Karen, I'm not implying that this is you,
but I wanna cover all the bases of this
because I feel like this is a really good teaching moment.
So there are people that will come into community,
come into family, come into some sort of place
where God is putting them because he places a solitary
in community and family.
And then there are things to learn there.
There's a stretching that is supposed to happen there.
It shouldn't be hard.
We shouldn't have to work at like a job
with everyone in that community,
but there might be a few hard relationships
within that community.
A lot of people give themselves permission to cut and run
because they don't wanna deal with one or two people
in that situation, right?
Or maybe one of the senior leaders
at their spiritual community is someone
who gets on their nerves or someone
that they don't think likes them.
Or a lot of times we'll start writing stories in our mind,
like creating cases, like legal cases against someone, right?
And then collecting evidence that what we believe
about that person is true.
That will happen.
And when that happens, I want you to take a closer look
at that because a lot of times there's an upgrade available
in that community and the enemy is trying
to drive you out of there so that you don't get it, right?
And then you're back to being a lone ranger
until you try to come into another community.
And then that same scenario is gonna play itself out.
So if you feel like you have a pattern like that,
where you go someplace, you start to get embedded
and you get offended and you leave,
we gotta take a look at that
because you're missing the upgrade.
You gotta stay.
You gotta allow that offense to point
to the broken place of your heart where it's coming from
so that we can do some hard work.
That's super important.
And then there's another part of maturity
where we've just been someplace for a really long time
and we've gotten everything that there can be for us
to get in that season from that place.
Not that we're consumers.
Hopefully you have reciprocal relationships
with people that you're in community with
where you're giving and they're taking
and they're giving and you're taking.
That's really important, all right?
But there will be times when it's time to move on
where God shows us, hey, you know,
in order for you to go where I wanna take you next,
you're gonna need new teachers.
You're gonna need new input.
A lot of people that come into our community,
this is very new stuff for them.
God has brought them here
alongside whatever in-person community they have
so that they can get that upgrade.
Now, I will tell you that because we're all Christians,
you will go into places where you will go head to head
with a religious spirit.
You know, we're not religious here at Last Year's Single.
And so we definitely do push a lot of envelopes.
We are more kingdom-minded than church-minded for sure.
And as people grow and learn here,
sometimes the things that they grow and learn
will begin to rub the people that they're in personal,
physical, in-person community with the wrong way
because those people are not here getting the upgrade.
Does that make sense?
And so they think you're off on some other.
They think you joined a cult.
They think you've gone crazy, you know?
And that's usually a good sign most of the time,
unless your leader is telling you to all get together
in a circle and drink some Kool-Aid and then not so much.
But anything that's drawing you closer to Jesus,
anything that's helping you to see, you know,
who you are and to forgive others and to love others,
you know, that's always a good thing.
And so I just want to go ahead and tell you guys
that there will be times when it's time for you to move on.
So Karen, this is what I wanna say to you.
When it is time to move on,
and all of you will have these times in your life,
you guys, it might be a job that it's time to move on from.
You've gotten everything you can in your career
from that job.
You know, you've been faithful, you've been consistent,
you've learned a lot, you've given a lot,
and you've received a lot.
And now there's nothing left to give and receive there.
In order for you to further your career,
you're going to have to go somewhere
where you're more challenged.
And people don't like when people leave.
So whether it's a relationship
that you needed to move on from,
maybe a best friendship, and you know,
they, you know, you're moving on,
they wanna stay stuck, they're not learning anything,
and you are besties,
but now there's starting to be friction
between the two of you,
because you're trying to move forward,
and at every single turn,
they're trying to pull you backward
because they feel like they're losing you,
and they're scared, right?
And fear a lot of times comes.
out as anger. Remember, anger is hurt and fears bodyguard. And so it's important for us to understand
that. So if you're dealing with that, with an interpersonal relationship, maybe a family
relationship, a work relationship or a job, a community, how do we leave things better than we
found them? Let's talk about that for a second. So Karen, it wouldn't be appropriate after this
one argument for you to cut and run. Okay. Especially since you said you've been in this
group for a long time and everything's been amicable and everything's been great. And you've
had a sisterhood just because we're leaving, just because we're moving on, just because we're
growing beyond what we can receive in those places. Doesn't mean we throw the baby out of
the bathwater. We want to bless what has instructed us and helped us and been important in our lives.
And we want to also move on respectfully, leaving things better than we found them.
All right. So pray to God, what that's going to look like for that. I think that where there's
offense, there always needs to be apologies, whether you meant it or not, it doesn't matter.
You need to understand that you're reading into things, this book, that they're not
comfortable pursuing. It makes them uncomfortable. And so they lashed out at you because they're
afraid. They're afraid of deception. They're afraid of, you know, heresy and they love you.
And now they think that you're off in cuckoo birdville. And they're probably afraid for you
at some level. Right. And you guys fear often looks like control. When people get afraid for
us, like genuinely afraid for us because they think that, you know, we're off on some other,
they will try to pull us back with control. They will try to pull us back with condemnation.
They will try to pull us back with fear. Oftentimes anybody, Oh, you better watch out.
Oh, that sounds, Hmm. That's not right. The Bible doesn't say that, you know, Oh,
you know what? I don't, you're getting yourself into something. You're getting in over your head.
They'll say things like that. Won't they? It was a job. They'll say, Hey, there's a recession.
This isn't the right time to leave. This isn't the right time to leave guys. I had a bride
that met a guy. I introduced her to a guy long distance. He was here in Austin. She was
in the Midwest and it was during COVID and they met up a few times and really liked each other
and started dating. And he was like, look, if this is going to be exclusive, you know,
you're going to have to move here. And she wanted to do that, but she was a teacher
and she had been a teacher for years and she started not liking being a teacher during COVID.
She really didn't want to do that for a living. She wanted to look into some other things,
but she went to her principal and she said, Hey, and she was almost 40 years old at this time.
She said, Hey, I've met, you know, I've never been married, never had any children. I met a
really great guy and I want to move to Austin and really see where this can go. And her principal
was like, okay, if you do that then I'm going to make sure that your teaching license gets revoked.
I'm not kidding y'all. She threatened her teaching license. And you know why? Because this
woman that I'm talking about was teacher of the year in that school system.
She led right to read week. She was the person that this principal leaned on for every single
thing at that award-winning school, because she's a phenomenal person and an incredible teacher.
And she didn't want to lose her. So instead of blessing her life and being happy for her,
she controlled her with fear. And guess what? She didn't leave. She broke up with him
out of fear of losing her license and all the things that was just BS, honestly.
And, um, and that guy moved on and is engaged in marrying somebody else.
We can't allow fear no matter what form it comes in. And no matter who it comes from
to hold us back, we can't. The enemy can threaten us all he wants to through other people.
But when God has given us permission to do something and he's invited us into a new season,
a new level and upgrade, then yes, it's going to stretch us. Yes. It's going to challenge us. Yes.
It's going to be uncomfortable. Yes. We want to bless people and love them and leave them,
you know, better than we found them, but we are not going to let them hold us back. Amen.
Amen. So if you leave a job, make sure
that you train up your successor.
And if your company won't fund hiring someone to replace you,
then that's their problem.
I work for a company like that.
And one of the girls that our work was phenomenal.
She was, uh, you know, a jack of all trades.
She could do everything.
She kept that place together.
She was the glue.
And when she put in her notice, she gave them a three month notice, y'all.
She gave him a 12 week notice saying that she'd be willing to train her
replacement because I'm telling you, she was not expendable.
And they were so upset that she was leaving that they called her bluff.
They didn't hire anyone.
Didn't hire anyone.
Hoping that she would change her mind.
When the last day of her employment came, I was there, I was in the office.
I did something completely different than her.
And she's like, Hey, she's like, today's my last day.
I'm like, are you kidding me?
And she's like, no, she's like, this is it.
This is the last day.
She said they haven't hired anyone to replace me.
She's like, I don't know what they think I'm going to do to stay out of loyalty.
So that I don't leave them an alert.
She said, but I'm leaving.
And she left guys after all of that beautiful, you know, work that she did
for that company for so many years.
Not only did they call her bluff, but they did not send her out.
They did not bless her.
They didn't give her a going away party.
They didn't honor her in any way because they were hoping that by
playing victim of we can't live without you, she would stay.
That's just a mess, right?
Don't let people bully you into staying.
Have a boundary.
I am leaving.
This is when I'm leaving.
This is what I'm willing to do in order to leave you better than I found you.
Like if it's your job, if they're not willing to do that, that's their problem.
That's their problem.
Right?
So that's good.
I feel like that's going to be pertinent to a lot of people.
If it's a friendship and you've been friends since kindergarten guys, I know
that sounds really noble and loyal and amazing, but some of you actually
have a gift of loyalty that is overextended and it's become a weakness.
Being a loyal person is amazing, but misplaced loyalty will destroy your life.
Make sure that you're using that gift in the right places with the
right people in the right timing.
I know people that have stayed at the same spiritual community all their
life is just like, well, this is where I got saved and you know, this is,
you know, my family and I owe it to them.
You owe it to yourself to grow.
And if you're in a place where you can't grow or you're stagnant and you're not,
you're not growing all the stuff you're reading about in the Bible.
You're not experiencing that stuff year after year after year.
And nobody else is around you.
That is not a place you want to be.
Just because other people want to be spiritually dead.
Doesn't mean you need to be dead with them.
And I know this is going to sting, but many times in those situations, people
will never be happy to see you go.
They will never bless you and they will always hold it against you.
You know, maybe even ostracizing you.
I know it's really sad, but even, you know, and especially controlling
spiritual communities, maybe even acting like, you know, you've done
something wrong and sinned by leaving.
And the other people in that congregation will even be
encouraged to steer clear of you.
Anyone else ever experienced that or some version of that where you moving
forward and growing and maturing is now being weaponized against you as if
you're some sort of bad person, Michelle question, it's not really a question.
It's not really a question more about a bit of a praise report somewhat.
Oh, we'd love to hear a praise report.
Go for it.
Right.
So I know the last time I spoke to you and said that, you know, I should go
out and scream somewhere, does this something out of the ordinary because
I'm more quiet, it's, it's, it's, it's different and new for me to have done
something like that, but it does feel freeing to be able to do something
that I have not done before.
So that was great.
So you went out and you screamed where'd you scream?
Yeah.
Um, well, I didn't see my car because I don't really have anywhere,
great, awesome.
Yeah, it is really good to learn how to interact with yourself be more
releasing. Right? Yes. Feels good. I love it. And also, you
know, when you were talking about being distracted from
moving on, I was kind of stuck at week two. I got distracted
and I got sick. So I wasn't able to move on to week three. But I
realized that there was a lot of stuff that was coming up. And I
was thinking, you know, I thought that I've worked on a
lot of stuff before, but it seemed like there was more. But
then last week, Friday, when I went to church, and you know, I
was sitting in church and thinking about all that I went
through before in my past, and how it affected me emotionally.
And then I even started thinking, you know, what if all
this hope that I'm getting from this program, you know, about
getting married, it's not going to happen, you know, and how is
that going to feel? But it's so funny that as I was leaving the
church, two ladies called me and said, I need to pray for you.
And what they prayed for me was that, you know, the season of
what was past, she said it was like Noah, instead of sea, God
was saying the season what was past will never happen again.
And it's time to move forward. And it's opened up something
new. And they told me that, you know, just like Joshua, when God
was telling him to take the land, to move the land, he told
him to be courageous. And she said that what God, God said to
her to tell him was to be courageous and trusting him to
move forward. And so yes, I thought I was interested in what
I thought about that was what I got from them that was telling
me to be courageous and trusting.
And I love that.
That is so that is so good. I want to show you something I'm
trying to bring it up real quick.
Some things that you said just now reminded me of one of my
past students that had success in this program, some very
similar things she was going through and experiencing and I
just want to show you her wedding picture.
That's nice.
All right, such a beautiful bride. Um, all right, love it.
Very similar, very similar situation. Especially with, you
know, when I met when I met her, her name's Dolores, when I met
her, she was living as a tenant in a building where there was a
leak in her apartment. And also the heat in New York, the heat
heater, the register didn't work. And she was afraid to say
something about it because she was just couldn't speak up for
herself. And so it started with that started with us helping her
to, you know, put up boundaries to use her voice, all of those
things. And pretty soon, you know, that landlord had fixed
those things. And then next, we tackled the next thing. And then
the next thing. And so even before she ended up, you know,
meeting her now husband and getting married, which, by the
way, she just didn't think that was going to happen at all. Like
she just she came in the program to do heart healing. And so she
had had so many other personal victories. She had a situation
at work where everyone was giving their work to her and she
couldn't speak up and speak up for herself. And she was always
doing everybody else's stuff. I mean, she grew and she grew and
she grew and she grew and she grew, grew, grew, grew until she
is now this woman who's happily married. But more than that,
she's happy in her profession. She's happy in her living
situation. She's happy. You know, she's able to speak up and
to do the things that she needs to do. And that's a huge
victory. So Abby, and then Janice.
Yeah, I think it's so interesting that you're talking
like the two people before me are talking about the same
thing, similar stuff. But some for my situation, I feel like
God tell me to move on from a lot of stuff like church, my
my current job, because I'm doing some ministry stuff. So I
don't know what's next. And then this, I think God promised me to
get married this year. That's why I joined this program. So
but basically, a lot of things I used to, you know, I'm staying
in one place for 10 years already. So a lot of things
that start to change. But I experienced some depression
recently, because I don't fit. I don't feel like I fit in
anywhere. But because I'm doing hard working, I'm being through
healing a long time. And this is hard, hard work is great. I
feel like I'll start to uncover a lot of interpersonal
relationship issues to to me. But sometimes I'm, I can get
very confused, you know, whether I don't feel fitting here is
that because God is removing me to a new place, or
because I have problems, you know, attachment issues, then that's why I don't feel fit in,
then it's very confusing and discouraging sometimes. And because God, I don't feel like
the new is that clear yet. Or a lot of aspect of so now my back and forth and back force.
Is that my problem? Or is that because God wants to move me on? Or it can be both? I don't know.
So this is the reason why Abby that we don't want anyone to make any big decisions during their
heartwork part or the heartwork phase of the program. Because so many people feel like you,
where there's all kinds of things coming to the surface. And when they come to the surface,
we're trying to figure out, hey, does this mean that, you know, it's time for me to relocate.
And a lot of people will relocate, you know, because that is part of their love story. It
is part of what God has for them. But the good news is that as you head into phase two and phase
three, you know, part of the program is to help you to deal with your attachment issues to help
you to learn how to be in relationship and community with others from within this community
as well. And so this is just the beginning is basically what I want to tell you. Nobody should
be making any huge life changing decisions during this phase of the program. Okay. You're going to
learn more, lots more about yourself and about how you can have better and healthier relationships.
Okay. Thank you. Yes. Yes. It's going to be great. Ladies, we're almost well, we're just
waiting on approval from Apple for our app. So sometimes it takes, you know, it can take a long
time, I guess is what I've heard. And so we're waiting on approval. So just keep praying that
that comes this week. I would really love to move us all over to the app. That means that when you
guys transition into phase two, you would be able to transition right to the app and come off of
Facebook, which would be incredible. Right. And I would love for that to happen. We'll have all the
same community elements that you have in your Facebook group on the app. So you won't miss out
on anything like that. But just still really waiting on that to be approved by Apple. They,
they don't like it if you don't give them a bunch of money in your app and we don't have in-app
purchases. So they're suspicious of us already. And we're trying to navigate that. If you have
an Android, don't worry. The Apple, the Apple still has to approve the app, but, you know,
when you download it from the app store, you know, there's Android and, and iPhone, you don't have to
just use an iPhone. Okay. Janice, you're up. Janice, Janice.
All right. Anybody else? I don't think maybe she can't hear maybe her hands up for something else.
Anybody else have any questions? Oh, you can't unmute here. Let me try to unmute you.
Hmm. All right. It's not working on my side either. All right. So I think the main theme
for this first session today, we have a session tonight at 8 p.m. Eastern is God really talking
to us about the proper way to transition, right? And how to, you know, yes, there will be times
when we need to leave places and even people behind. And while that does seem disloyal to
those of you that have that overextended sense of loyalty, it's going to be necessary. It really is.
I know people that have opted out of a lot of blessings in their lives and even love stories
because they refuse to leave their families. You know, they are very codependent with their
families, very unhealthy relationships with their families being held back and being kept from a
lot of progress by those relationships. And yet they just felt so guilty that they just really
couldn't move forward. And we don't want that to be the case with any of you. And whether that be
spiritual communities or friendships or place of employment or whatever, we want to continue
to move forward.
The kingdom is a moving model.
Did you guys know that?
It's always advancing and taking territory, isn't it?
And so we need to be a people that's mobile.
We need to be a mobile people.
That being said, we also don't want to miss the lessons of maturity
that come from being with people that rub our rough edges off.
So there's a balance there.
There's a balance.
And so it's good.
So Karen is going to, and here's the other thing that we,
here's one more thing that's jumping into my mind.
When we have been given a revelation from the Lord,
when he's invited us into that upgrade, think of it as your phone.
Every once in a while,
my iPhone will say that there's a new operating system available.
Look at my little grand babies.
A new operating system available.
And then I have the opportunity to download it.
And then I'm operating at that, at that level of that system.
Now my husband may still have the old operating system.
My friends may still have the old operating system because they haven't
gotten the upgrade on their phone yet. Right.
And so when we get the upgrade, we don't need to be arrogant that, Oh,
I got new emojis that you don't have. I can, I can do this. I know that.
We don't need to be arrogant with our revelation. Right.
And so if we're learning new things about the kingdom,
if we're learning new things about the spirit realm,
if we're learning new things about God's love and our identity,
even heartwork,
you don't want to shove heartwork down someone else's throat. Okay.
If God's given you a grace in this season to upgrade into a higher
understanding and knowledge of his love and your identity, that's amazing,
but we don't look down on people that don't have it.
We want to make sure that we're humble in this place of upgrade.
And how do we do that?
By when a conversation comes up and we can see that that person's not
ready for that upgrade, you know, they don't have grace for that revelation.
We don't push it. We don't prob. We don't say, well, this is the truth too bad.
If you can't receive it, we're not arrogant,
prideful with that revelation. We just say, Oh,
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. You know,
I was just really interested in this book that I was reading or, you know,
we bow out gracefully.
And then you might say a prayer for that person that they would come to a
place where they're able to receive a new revelation,
especially in an area where they need an upgrade. Right.
It's important. You know, my mom's husband, you know,
I don't want to call him my stepdad.
And I also don't really feel comfortable calling him my dad.
Cause he really hasn't been that to me. Anybody else?
Like I'm not going to call him my stepdad.
Cause I feel like those are words of disconnection.
So I'm not going to call him that, but when I,
every time I try to call him my dad,
it just doesn't flow off my tongue because he really wasn't there for me.
Wasn't a father to me, like didn't raise me, but we do have.
A brother, like his son is my brother, you know,
and he was married to my mom for many years. And now that she's passed,
it's like all of us are together because, you know,
we stay together to remember her and, you know,
like we all have shared memories, so to speak of things.
Anyway, when my mom was alive, I had a very tumultuous and tumultuous and
complicated, you know, relationship with her.
But when I would call to talk to her, if he would answer the phone,
he would just hand her the phone.
Like he wasn't even trying to have relationship with me and I don't have a
dad. So I would have loved to like, Hey, you know,
have relationship with me. You're the father to my little brother.
You know, don't you want to be anything to me?
And I'm just getting really upset about it.
And I would try to like talk about different things.
Every time he'd get on the phone or answer the phone,
I'd try to talk to him, you know, and stuff. And he would just,
and even when I would be in person with him,
I'd be trying to talk to my mom about heartwork or something.
Cause you know,
God gave me the revelation of heartwork and I'd be trying to talk to my mom
and he would just kind of walk away or whatever. And one day specifically,
I was really offended by him really offended by his lack of desire for
relationship and lack of desire for growth and just anything good.
And I was in my little self-righteous britches and I was walking around my
neighborhood and I was just kind of talking to God and having a, you know,
a little, a little tantrum.
And God said,
how would you feel if you went to school and a teacher gave you a test,
a very important test that was going to make up a large percentage of your
grade. And yet when you went to take the test,
you didn't know any of the information on the test.
It was all foreign to you.
You hadn't been taught any of the things that she was testing you over.
And I said, I be mad about it. I would think it was unfair and unjust.
I would probably demand justice and probably go to the principal.
I'd probably report her. You know,
I was saying all the things that I would probably do if that was the case.
And he said, this is how Mike, his name's Mike. This is how Mike feels.
feels when he talks to you."
And I was like, what do you mean?
He said, you continue, whether you know it or not,
to test him and give him tests over information
that he's never learned.
You continue to try to talk to him
from a revelation that he doesn't have.
And he feels very frustrated.
He feels very offended.
He feels, you know, put upon.
He said, and it's not loving of you.
And I was doing that.
And I didn't realize I was doing it.
Okay, I was just being myself.
And so it was important for me to understand
that I was giving him tests and then failing him.
And he felt my disappointment in him.
He could feel me failing him
because he didn't have the right answers
or didn't know or wasn't interested.
And you guys, we have to be careful
with people that are in our lives
that are gonna be in our lives.
There's no way we're getting rid of these people.
Okay, there are baby daddies, all right.
And there are, you know, relatives, grandparents, parents,
children, could even have kids like this,
grown adult kids or kids that are becoming adults.
They're just people that, you know,
they're gonna be in your life for the foreseeable future.
And you have to be careful that you're not doing this
because all it's doing is it's causing them
to not want to learn the material.
It's causing them not to want to learn the material.
So let's be careful.
Let's pray into that.
God, am I giving anyone tests over information
and revelation that they don't have?
Am I acting in a way that's self-righteous?
You know, am I doing any of those things?
Because we wanna make sure that we're not doing those things
that we're in grace, keep it simple, sweetheart.
The gospel is simple.
You know, I love the verse.
I love the quote that says, you know,
preach the gospel and if necessary, use words,
meaning that our life should tell a story.
The way we treat each other with kindness and compassion,
empathy, all of the things that should tell the story
and that it is that we wanna tell, all right?
So I might see some of you guys tonight at eight.
If you show up there, you don't have to.
It'll be a whole different bag though,
because Holy Spirit will take us a different direction
with whatever it is that we talk about.
This will be available in replay.
We do have Supernational Saturday.
How many of you are gonna be transferring
before we meet again into phase two?
Raise your hand if you're gonna be going to phase two
before next week's coaching.
Okay, don't forget to remove yourself from phase one
after you are approved for phase two.
Join phase two first, request it,
and when you're approved and you're in there,
then come back to phase one and leave the group, okay?
So make sure you do it that way.
I really hope that by the time that that happens,
we'll be giving you an email that's teaching you
how to download the app and get over there.
That would be wonderful.
So keep that in prayer.
Also, there was one more thing
that I was gonna make all community.
I'm gonna post it in the group.
I think there's one more session that we're gonna make
for all the communities on phase one, two, and three,
because we want everyone to be there.
So Supernatural Saturday, Sunday Night Activate.
Supernatural Saturday is going to be
about consistency and discipline.
It is gonna be a really important one.
So if you wanna show up for that,
that's gonna be great, all right?
Okay, see you guys soon.
Love y'all, bye.