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We are taught from day one to be independent, to be maverick, to do our own thing, that everything

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falls on your shoulders. And that's just absolutely not true. It's a falsehood. We need each other.

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So I want to talk about blood-stained allies. As we talk about high-impact living,

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as we talk about having a maximum impact, we need friends in our life. We need people

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who are sanctified relationships, people who really care about us. You know, even today,

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I had a young man who I think he considers me like a blood-stained ally for him. And he was

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in the throes of a big decision that he needed to make, and he wanted some advice. So I shared

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from my perspective, and I would say he was probably 25 to 26 years old. He started his

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own company, and he wanted wisdom about that. And I was able to give that. And, you know,

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every day we're faced with choices and decisions that could change the trajectory of our life.

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And to have some other people in our life that we can ask wisdom from, that we can get advice from,

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is huge. And I find that most of us don't have that. Most men especially don't. I think women

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are better at blood-stained allies than men, but most of us men tend to be isolational in the way

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we treat people, and it's to our own detriment that we do that. That's a big, huge mistake.

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And so at our church, at The Road, we talk about blood-stained allies all the time. In my book,

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Worshipper Warrior, I have a chapter called Allies, and I talk about David. Because David's a

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really good example to us of the power of blood-stained allies. Here is the king's son-in-law

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running for his life from King Saul, and he goes to the cave of Adullam, and 400 men gather to him

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and become his, what would be later called his mighty men. David's mighty men came from this

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group. But I don't know what would have happened, honestly, to David if he hadn't had these blood-

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stained allies in his life. Same thing with Paul. Paul had Silas. Paul had Barnabas. Paul had others

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in his life. If you want a fascinating look at the importance of blood-stained allies in the

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apostle Paul's life, look at the last chapter of Romans. And we just finished a study of Romans at

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our church here, and it's like 25 names in the last chapter of Romans of commendation that Paul

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is giving to them. These are close friends of his. So Paul, the theologian, Paul, the leader,

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Paul, the very driven missionary, had lots of close relationships. So we need relationships

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in our life. And in our culture, we are taught from day one to be independent, to be maverick,

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to do our own thing, that everything falls on your shoulders. And that's just absolutely not

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true. It's a falsehood. We need each other. And when I went through a really deep, dark time in

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my life almost a decade ago, it was blood-stained allies that came to my fire pit and bolstered me

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with encouragement and belief in me that got me through it, man. I don't know what would have

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happened if it hadn't been for blood-stained allies in my life. What are blood-stained allies?

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I think blood-stained allies are men and women who have been bloodied by life. They have made

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some mistakes. They have failed. So they're not judgmental. They're not judgmental toward you.

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They're not going to cascade you down this road of what a loser you are because you made some

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mistakes. Blood-stained allies are people who've also been blood-stained by life. And thus,

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they're vulnerable. They're vulnerable to their own life and their own shortcomings.

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And that invites and gives permission to you to be vulnerable also. So blood-stained allies are

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people who've been blood-stained. They're also people who are allies. So they're on the same

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team. I'm not talking about just anybody. I'm talking about people with the same values and

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vision that you have in your life. Because if I go to someone tomorrow asking about advice related to

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a business that I'm involved in, and they're not a kingdom person, they're not a Christian,

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they're not Jesus followers, they're going to give me advice that's based probably completely

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on money, completely on security in that regard.

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which is fine, but I need allies that know what my vision is,

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they know what my values are, and they have them too.

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And they say, well, OK, look, here's

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the four or five components involved in that,

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and they can give me advice.

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That's an ally.

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That's someone who is on the same team,

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going in the same direction, with the same vision

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and values.

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A blessed ally also is somebody who's vulnerable,

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someone who is willing to talk about shame, brokenness,

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and their own failures.

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And so because of that, they've experienced some failures,

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they've experienced some brokenness.

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They really do have good, solid, relational advice for you

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in that relationship.

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You guys can relate to each other

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because you've both been in some sticky situations

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where you might have wanted to even give up.

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The other thing about blessed and allies

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is that our hearts were made for connection.

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You are made for connection, men and women.

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God made you that way.

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All the studies show that even little children

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that are caressed and cuddled next

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to the breast of their mother tend to be more secure people,

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tend to have a deeper level of intimacy toward others.

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And the opposite is also true.

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Those that haven't had that growing up

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have all kinds of connective disorders.

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So we need connection, and we need

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to keep nurturing connection in our life.

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It's huge.

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It's really important.

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And it's in that connection that we also

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build within us a web of relationships and networks

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that can bolster our confidence as we move out.

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Because there's something confidence-building

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in knowing you've got a family, in knowing that you've

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got some friends that are going to watch your back,

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they're going to have your six no matter what's happening.

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They're going to take care of you.

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And so blessed and allies is huge in having a maximum impact

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life.

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One of the most interesting studies

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has been called the Amaya effect.

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And having lived in Japan for almost 10 years,

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I really saw this to be true.

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And in this study, which was done at the University

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of California, Berkeley, quote, the causes of our health

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problems are often attributed to industrialization,

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urbanization, technology, pollution, smoking cigarettes,

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and the fast pace of life.

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But the Japanese have all of these things.

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Indeed, they smoke more than any other nation.

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They have worse problems in all of the areas mentioned.

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But despite these health hazards,

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Japanese have the highest life expectancy in the world,

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the lowest heart disease rate among nations,

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and the lowest rate of death from all causes.

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How is this possible?

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What we believe explains the protection found among Japanese

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is called Amaya, a characteristic that they value.

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Amaya emphasizes a belief that the well-being

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of the individual depends on cooperation with others,

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goodwill from a person's group.

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In other words, social support is

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central to the values of Japanese practice

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and continues to provide resistance to disease,

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end quote.

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Isn't that amazing?

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So here's a society.

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And I know this is all true, having lived there.

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We were with college students every day

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because I was working on a college campus.

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Everybody smoked cigarettes.

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The pollution, and this is in the 80s and 90s in Tokyo,

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was so bad that you could take like a baby wipe

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and just wipe it.

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I could wipe it across my face when I got home

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and it was just black just from all of the soot,

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all of the pollution that was on my skin

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from being in the city all day.

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Their life expectancy is higher.

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The rate of disease is lower.

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The connectivity of the relationships of the people

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actually builds their immune system.

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It actually strengthens their immune system

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by having relationships.

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And men and women, your immune system

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is stronger when you have relationships.

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Your immune system is stronger in all forms of disease,

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all kinds of problems, especially

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like depression, loneliness, and anxiety

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when you have close ties, close connection with people.

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So let me challenge you that a high-impact life is someone

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who, in another course that I did here on Empower You,

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I talked about EQ, emotional quotient,

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the importance again of the ability

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to have good relationships.

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All of that builds your immune system.

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It builds your spiritual immune system,

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your physical immune system,

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your mental and emotional immune system.

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let me challenge you as I close out this series that blessed and allies are huge

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you could do all the others well but if you don't have friends if you don't have

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connection you're going to be worse off so I challenge you to work on blessed

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and allies look for someone in your life that you trust that you value that you

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respect and maybe ask them if they would be a blessed and ally explain what it is

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have them watch this video and and begin that relationship I have a lot of guys

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in my life like that it's really had a huge impact and everything that I do and

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so I hope this is helpful to you I hope you'll go for it have a wholehearted

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maximum impact life go for it man bring it on

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you