We are taught from day one to be independent, to be maverick, to do our own thing, that everything
falls on your shoulders. And that's just absolutely not true. It's a falsehood. We need each other.
So I want to talk about blood-stained allies. As we talk about high-impact living,
as we talk about having a maximum impact, we need friends in our life. We need people
who are sanctified relationships, people who really care about us. You know, even today,
I had a young man who I think he considers me like a blood-stained ally for him. And he was
in the throes of a big decision that he needed to make, and he wanted some advice. So I shared
from my perspective, and I would say he was probably 25 to 26 years old. He started his
own company, and he wanted wisdom about that. And I was able to give that. And, you know,
every day we're faced with choices and decisions that could change the trajectory of our life.
And to have some other people in our life that we can ask wisdom from, that we can get advice from,
is huge. And I find that most of us don't have that. Most men especially don't. I think women
are better at blood-stained allies than men, but most of us men tend to be isolational in the way
we treat people, and it's to our own detriment that we do that. That's a big, huge mistake.
And so at our church, at The Road, we talk about blood-stained allies all the time. In my book,
Worshipper Warrior, I have a chapter called Allies, and I talk about David. Because David's a
really good example to us of the power of blood-stained allies. Here is the king's son-in-law
running for his life from King Saul, and he goes to the cave of Adullam, and 400 men gather to him
and become his, what would be later called his mighty men. David's mighty men came from this
group. But I don't know what would have happened, honestly, to David if he hadn't had these blood-
stained allies in his life. Same thing with Paul. Paul had Silas. Paul had Barnabas. Paul had others
in his life. If you want a fascinating look at the importance of blood-stained allies in the
apostle Paul's life, look at the last chapter of Romans. And we just finished a study of Romans at
our church here, and it's like 25 names in the last chapter of Romans of commendation that Paul
is giving to them. These are close friends of his. So Paul, the theologian, Paul, the leader,
Paul, the very driven missionary, had lots of close relationships. So we need relationships
in our life. And in our culture, we are taught from day one to be independent, to be maverick,
to do our own thing, that everything falls on your shoulders. And that's just absolutely not
true. It's a falsehood. We need each other. And when I went through a really deep, dark time in
my life almost a decade ago, it was blood-stained allies that came to my fire pit and bolstered me
with encouragement and belief in me that got me through it, man. I don't know what would have
happened if it hadn't been for blood-stained allies in my life. What are blood-stained allies?
I think blood-stained allies are men and women who have been bloodied by life. They have made
some mistakes. They have failed. So they're not judgmental. They're not judgmental toward you.
They're not going to cascade you down this road of what a loser you are because you made some
mistakes. Blood-stained allies are people who've also been blood-stained by life. And thus,
they're vulnerable. They're vulnerable to their own life and their own shortcomings.
And that invites and gives permission to you to be vulnerable also. So blood-stained allies are
people who've been blood-stained. They're also people who are allies. So they're on the same
team. I'm not talking about just anybody. I'm talking about people with the same values and
vision that you have in your life. Because if I go to someone tomorrow asking about advice related to
a business that I'm involved in, and they're not a kingdom person, they're not a Christian,
they're not Jesus followers, they're going to give me advice that's based probably completely
on money, completely on security in that regard.
which is fine, but I need allies that know what my vision is,
they know what my values are, and they have them too.
And they say, well, OK, look, here's
the four or five components involved in that,
and they can give me advice.
That's an ally.
That's someone who is on the same team,
going in the same direction, with the same vision
and values.
A blessed ally also is somebody who's vulnerable,
someone who is willing to talk about shame, brokenness,
and their own failures.
And so because of that, they've experienced some failures,
they've experienced some brokenness.
They really do have good, solid, relational advice for you
in that relationship.
You guys can relate to each other
because you've both been in some sticky situations
where you might have wanted to even give up.
The other thing about blessed and allies
is that our hearts were made for connection.
You are made for connection, men and women.
God made you that way.
All the studies show that even little children
that are caressed and cuddled next
to the breast of their mother tend to be more secure people,
tend to have a deeper level of intimacy toward others.
And the opposite is also true.
Those that haven't had that growing up
have all kinds of connective disorders.
So we need connection, and we need
to keep nurturing connection in our life.
It's huge.
It's really important.
And it's in that connection that we also
build within us a web of relationships and networks
that can bolster our confidence as we move out.
Because there's something confidence-building
in knowing you've got a family, in knowing that you've
got some friends that are going to watch your back,
they're going to have your six no matter what's happening.
They're going to take care of you.
And so blessed and allies is huge in having a maximum impact
life.
One of the most interesting studies
has been called the Amaya effect.
And having lived in Japan for almost 10 years,
I really saw this to be true.
And in this study, which was done at the University
of California, Berkeley, quote, the causes of our health
problems are often attributed to industrialization,
urbanization, technology, pollution, smoking cigarettes,
and the fast pace of life.
But the Japanese have all of these things.
Indeed, they smoke more than any other nation.
They have worse problems in all of the areas mentioned.
But despite these health hazards,
Japanese have the highest life expectancy in the world,
the lowest heart disease rate among nations,
and the lowest rate of death from all causes.
How is this possible?
What we believe explains the protection found among Japanese
is called Amaya, a characteristic that they value.
Amaya emphasizes a belief that the well-being
of the individual depends on cooperation with others,
goodwill from a person's group.
In other words, social support is
central to the values of Japanese practice
and continues to provide resistance to disease,
end quote.
Isn't that amazing?
So here's a society.
And I know this is all true, having lived there.
We were with college students every day
because I was working on a college campus.
Everybody smoked cigarettes.
The pollution, and this is in the 80s and 90s in Tokyo,
was so bad that you could take like a baby wipe
and just wipe it.
I could wipe it across my face when I got home
and it was just black just from all of the soot,
all of the pollution that was on my skin
from being in the city all day.
Their life expectancy is higher.
The rate of disease is lower.
The connectivity of the relationships of the people
actually builds their immune system.
It actually strengthens their immune system
by having relationships.
And men and women, your immune system
is stronger when you have relationships.
Your immune system is stronger in all forms of disease,
all kinds of problems, especially
like depression, loneliness, and anxiety
when you have close ties, close connection with people.
So let me challenge you that a high-impact life is someone
who, in another course that I did here on Empower You,
I talked about EQ, emotional quotient,
the importance again of the ability
to have good relationships.
All of that builds your immune system.
It builds your spiritual immune system,
your physical immune system,
your mental and emotional immune system.
let me challenge you as I close out this series that blessed and allies are huge
you could do all the others well but if you don't have friends if you don't have
connection you're going to be worse off so I challenge you to work on blessed
and allies look for someone in your life that you trust that you value that you
respect and maybe ask them if they would be a blessed and ally explain what it is
have them watch this video and and begin that relationship I have a lot of guys
in my life like that it's really had a huge impact and everything that I do and
so I hope this is helpful to you I hope you'll go for it have a wholehearted
maximum impact life go for it man bring it on
you