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I could never, in a million years, think that I would be able to say that I'm not an alcoholic

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anymore.

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My name is Joel McClelland.

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I grew up in the church, it was a very Holy Spirit stifled church.

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You know, if you don't have that relationship with Jesus, it's almost like it's not real

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at that point.

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You have Father and Son, but that's just in paper, you know, there's no relationship,

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there's no feelings.

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So I ended up just going on my own path after high school, during high school, and just

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got deeper into partying, deeper into just doing whatever I wanted, and so I had no purpose

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in my life.

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And I was lost, man, I was confused, I didn't know what I wanted to do after high school.

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So I just kept drinking, and I realized I could drink, and I could drink and drink and

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drink.

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And then after that, it was like I had to drink or else I couldn't function, and that

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was a lot of my life.

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I don't know, I never thought that I was not going to be an alcoholic.

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I had 100% made up in my mind that that was the rest of my life, because there was no

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hope.

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I mean, I just got to that point where I ran out of any resources I had, slept in a tent

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by the railroad.

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Addiction is rough.

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Just so crazy, like, what those drugs will make you do, and like the spirits, I guess

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it's the spirits probably attached to them, like under the influence of meth, you will

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steal.

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You'll steal.

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And it doesn't even matter why.

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Satan was doing things to like scare me.

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I almost felt like he was trying to make me go crazy by the things he did.

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What made me realize that there must be a God was just seeing the evil out there.

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If this stuff's real, then there must be a God too.

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I started seeking Him.

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I wasn't sure if it was Jesus at first, but that was like what was so important to me.

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I was just seeking the truth with my whole heart, you know, it wasn't necessarily Jesus

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that my answer was.

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I didn't have an answer.

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The spring of 2020, I've been out there two winters.

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At this point, I'm really starting to believe in Him.

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I see His miracles a lot more, and I see the spiritual world a lot more, and how He works

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in our favor and stuff, how He's protecting me, how I never had to worry about where I

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was going to eat or how I was going to have clothes.

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I always had plenty of stuff out there.

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He was always taking care of me to the point where I could give my stuff away to people

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that needed it.

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I was just having one of those days that God was talking to me a lot, and I ended up in

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front of the Salvation Army.

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He just told me to start praying there, and that's when I got baptized in the Holy Spirit

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right there.

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Looking back at it, I'm like, wow, I was asking for help, and that's what God says.

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If you ask, He'll send you to help.

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I got up and started praising Him, and I was crying, and I ran across America the Beautiful

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Park proclaiming His name, and everybody looked at me like I was crazy.

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Since then, I knew that I was His, and I was, you know, what that meant.

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That's really the day that I understood what that meant.

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At first, after that day, not a whole lot changed.

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I thought miraculously everything was going to change.

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The girl I was with at the time, she was pregnant with my son.

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I was still kind of in some bad stuff, but I was on the right track.

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I had gotten in a little bit of trouble, and I was in jail when he was born.

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While I was in my stint in jail, that helped me get off the alcohol.

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I quit smoking cigarettes and stuff.

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I knew the responsibility that I had when I got out, and God made that really clear

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to me.

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Plus, He had always put it in my heart to want to be a dad, so I was just really excited.

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I know it sounds cliche, but I look back, and I don't see that person in me anymore.

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I was so angry and so upset all the time and so depressed.

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I just thought that was normal, man.

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I thought that people felt like this, and I just couldn't handle it.

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I'm a totally different person.

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I can't even explain it, really.

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It's the deepest, darkest places that He's willing to go for us.

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Even when I kept saying, no, no, no, He's like, no, I'm going to keep trying, I'm going

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to keep trying, because you're mine.

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He wasn't giving up on me.

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Stop thinking about your sins, and start thinking about God's love.

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I'm a sinner, but I'm saved and redeemed.

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I could never in a million years think that I would be able to say that I'm not an alcoholic

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anymore.

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But Jesus broke those chains, man.