So, welcome to last year's single challenge day two, and if you have not signed up for
our emails, maybe a friend added you to this Facebook community, but you did not go through
the website www.jackiedorman.com, you're going to want to go over there and register.
You're already here in the place where we're watching the challenge, so that's fine, you're
going to get an email that's going to invite you to come here, you're already here, so
that's cool, but that will put you on our list, and you can opt out of our list any
time you want to if you don't want to hear from me anymore, but you're not going to want
to because I send all kinds of amazing bonus content, I tell you love stories, I encourage
your heart, I give you all kinds of opportunities to do all sorts of fun things for singles
community, including Last Trip Single, that is my new brand, if you want a vacation with
other like-minded singles, maybe even meet a significant other on a retreat or a cruise,
then I got news for you.
We have a new brand called Last Trip Single, and you'll hear about that if you join that
email list, and so make sure that you do that, okay?
Alright, also invite a friend, invite a friend to come here, I believe that what we help
make happen for others, God makes happen for us.
If we have a poverty mentality, if we have a scarcity mentality like, oh, you know, I
got a gatekeep, I got a gatekeep, I got to make sure that no other woman comes into this
group because that means there's less men to go around.
You guys, no men have left the earth except for the ones that have obviously gone on to
heaven so they're not eligible bachelors anymore, but there is at least 49% of the 8 plus billion
population is men.
Now some of them are definitely too young for us, right?
They're just born, they just were born, and they're just growing up.
But men in your age range, there are more than enough for marriage-minded women, and
why is that?
Because marriage is not really something that's popular right now in this day and age.
It's not.
And so if you're a marriage-minded person, the chances of you being able to meet another
marriage-minded person, that's, we call them the three M's, masculine, mature, and marriage-minded,
obviously Jesus following guy, because this is a Christian group, right?
Then there are more than enough to go around.
So don't gatekeep.
Go ahead and invite your other Christian single female friends and invite your male friends
as well.
And you're still going to send them to www.jackiedorman.com and the guys are going to sign up for their
challenge group and then the ladies are going to end up here with us, all right?
Don't worry.
After you graduate from this challenge place in our program, there's opportunity to go
into our actual last year single program where the first two phases are definitely
women only, men only, but then there is a third community level that everyone gets funneled
into together.
And so that's a great time.
We've had so many people get married from the phase three of our program with each other.
We've had so many marriages that have happened from within this community.
And so that is, I love that.
I love that.
And so many, so many marriages supernaturally happen from just the work that you do here,
period.
Right?
Just period.
But when one of my male students marries one of my female students, that for me is like,
Ooh, that's my favorite.
That's my favorite.
So I quoted a few lyrics to a song yesterday because before I hopped on, I felt Holy Spirit
was putting this song in my heart.
I hadn't heard it anywhere and it's a really old love song, kind of from the 80s, kind
of broken heart love song.
But it came back to me today and I believe that once again, the challenge is different
every time I teach it because it's a different group of people.
And I'm a prophetic teacher, meaning I'm going to tune into heaven for what you need to hear.
Not necessarily just some, you know, list or some, you know, template that I want to
get out there to you.
I want to, it's going to be customized to your heart.
And so the lyrics to this song are, I'll get over you.
I know I will.
I'll pretend my ship's not sinking.
That word pretend there.
I'll tell myself I'm over you because I'm the king of wishful thinking.
And in this case, the queen of wishful thinking, this is someone who's hurting someone who's
going to put on a good face when they go out in public, but they're broken hearted.
They're disappointed in love.
I think there's a lot of people in here that are trying to get over someone.
Maybe it's a situation ship.
Maybe it's a divorce.
Maybe it's someone that you really thought was going to be the one and now they've ghosted
you or they've broken up with you.
They've broken your heart in some way.
I feel like there's lots of people in this community that are going through a broken
hearted place where you're still raw.
You're still trying to heal.
Okay.
It's not water under the bridge.
It's not far in the past.
It's something that you're really dealing with current day.
And the Bible tells us that the broken heart is three things.
It's a pretender.
And this song says, I'm going to pretend my ship's not sinking.
It's a pretender.
It's also a deceiver.
It's a liar.
to you. It's going to tell you that you want things that you don't want and that you need
things that you don't need. Those are two main characteristics of our broken heart.
Okay. That it's wickedly deceitful. Okay. And it's pretending. And so it's important
that we understand that it's going to have us running in circles and circles and circles.
If we don't allow Holy Spirit to come and to show us the areas that need to be healed
so that they can be healed. And so that's what we're doing here. We're going to do
some of that work today. We're going to kind of see where some of those cracks
are in the foundation. We're going to see that today as we go forward into day two,
but I want to do a little tiny recap of day one. Can I do that? I think that it's important to
hear things more than one time, especially key points so that you can start getting it embedded
in your heart. Okay. Want to do that. So we talked at the end of day one, if you haven't watched it,
make sure you go watch the replay. Where does the replay live? It lives in the featured section
of this Facebook group. That's where it lives. Okay. So that's where you're going to find it.
That's where we're going to find today's replay as well in tomorrow's replay. It's always going
to be tagged in the featured section of this group. I think we're also tagging it in the guide
section of this group. You'll also be receiving emails with a link to go right to it in this group.
So you can't miss it unless you're trying to. And so if you're not going to go all the way,
don't go at all. So it's important that you watch all three days because we're building
and going somewhere. And there's a lots of healing for your heart, even just right now
in this three-day challenge. Okay. So marriage is for the mature, right? God wants to get us
to a place where we can handle the weightiness of marriage. We unpacked that yesterday. We talked
about how marriage will change you. It will mature you. It's God's maturity plan for mankind.
It's not supposed to be easy. It's just supposed to be worth it. Especially not in the year 2024.
Guys, marriage or any kind of commitment or covenant that you would make is not going to be
Why is that? Because the Bible tells us at the end of the age, which you've been living in for
a long time, that people would be promise breakers, right? That people would be selfish.
And that is one of the reasons that I've given you for why there are so many single people,
including single Christians, right? All of that brokenness has found its way into our lives as
well. And some of you, just like me, you have your backstory is that, you know, you were born out on
the plains of the Serengeti. You were raised by wolves. I like to say that I came out of my
mother's womb running for my life and mother's day is coming up this weekend. And a lot of you
have serious mommy wounds still. And even though that's not a man woman relationship, it's a woman
woman relationship. It is blocking you from being able to trust because that primary relationship
where you should have been loved unconditionally. Instead of that, there was a lot of competition.
There was a lot of jealousy. There was a lot of abuse, verbal abuse, mental abuse, emotional abuse,
maybe even physical or sexual abuse. And that is keeping you from being able to move forward.
And then a lot of us of course have father wounds as well. And we'll get into some of what that,
what that looks like in our current day life and those unconscious things that are happening as a
result of those traumas. Trauma doesn't just hurt us. It creates different versions of us.
And we are living out of those counterfeit versions of us. Remember those broken hearts
are pretenders and they're liars. And it's important that we understand that unless we
get down to the root of that, we're going to continue to have a life that is far below what
God had for us, including our love lives. Okay. So if it's not this gift of singleness that Paul
was talking about in first Corinthians, that's keeping us single, what is keeping us single?
And I gave you three areas that are based on the curse because just in a nutshell, the curse is
what's keeping us single. And when we still live in those cursed identities, you know, and all of us
are, every one of us are still living out of a cursed identity or a trauma based identity in
some area of our lives. And it's really easy to find those areas. Those are the areas where you're
on the struggle bus. Those are the areas where your life is tore up from the floor up. That is
the area where you're still believing lies. And we're going to kind of unmask some of those lies
today in our second banner verse over this movement. God gave me two banner verses over
this movement. I shared one of them yesterday. I'm going to share the other one today. And I'll
give you a little recap of the first one I shared in a second. So many have misused different
theology, like the gift of singleness, or God should be enough for you to explain why people
are single now. And that sounds good, right? It sounds like, oh, that makes sense. All right. Not
everyone's going to get married because, you know, there's not enough good people or good men or
godly men to go around. And this is the way it works. And God doesn't want us married. He wants
us to himself. Look, Jesus loves you. And he wants to have a relationship with you. But even Jesus is
like, I think it's time that you see other people. Jesus wants you to see other people, too. All
right. Why? Because the more that you grow in human relationship, the more that you understand
the goodness of God. You've been created not just for divine relationship. You've also been created
for human relationship. All right. So we have a tendency to create all this crazy false theology
that's not biblical to explain away our pain.
to make it okay. Well, okay, this is the way it is. I'm just going to go ahead and
accept this. No, don't accept it. Do you accept sickness as just the way it is?
Do you accept poverty as just the way it is? God hasn't created you to live in
these effects of the curse. Jesus died to reconcile you back to your royal
identity, your heavenly identity, and to give you back what was lost from your
original design. Guess what? Marriage is one of those things. It didn't happen
after the curse. It happened before the curse. It's part of original design, and
God wants you to not only believe in it, but to want it. Not just to say,
maybe it will happen, and if it does, great, that would be great, wonderful. No.
He wants you to admit that you want it, and not just want it, but you need a
partner. You just don't want a partner. You need a partner. You don't just want a
man. You need a man. Why? Because you've been created to partner with a man, and
we're better together. If you had the gift of singleness like Paul, you
wouldn't be here. You wouldn't be desiring and yearning for a husband and
family. You would be content in your singleness because you would be focused
on vocational ministry. People that have the gift of singleness are people that
are missionaries. They're people that are monks and priests. These are the people
that have the gift of celibacy. Now, once again, you can have that gift for a
season of your life where you're just not really interested in romantic
relationship because you're working on you, and a lot of you, that's why you're
here, because you skipped that season. You've been constantly out there trying
to shove a man in a God-shaped hole, and we got to get the what? The horse before
the cart. It's time for you to have like a little sabbatical from dating or
mating, and trying to shove people into a space that only God can make you whole
in, whole in Christ. But then, once that happens, most of us are created to
partner, and we're going to partner. So if it's not the gift of singleness
keeping us single, then what is it? Pain, disappointment in our own past, just in
the culture that we live in. We see so many people failing, and so many crazy
things happening, and we're like, hey, if they can't make it work, then nobody can
make it work. Our hearts are hardened from that disappointment. The Word of God
tells us that people would have hard hearts at the end of the age, right? Their
love would what? Wax cold is what it says. So desensitize, fear of intimacy, fear of
trusting people, suspicious, guarded, all that stuff, and religion. Religion is
giving people a void and attachment. It's actually keeping people single, and
keeping people in this proverbial waiting room. I promised to tell you
about the word wait. Well, it's not in the Bible. So much is lost in translation, and
I know that so many of us English speakers think that we're the only ones
on earth, and everything's English. Well, guess what? The Holy Scriptures were not
originally written in the English language. They were written in old
language, ancient language, specifically Hebrew and Greek, and when we translate
those words into English, sometimes us English speakers, we think it means
something that it doesn't mean, and the word wait is one of those words. Let's
take a popular scripture that has the word wait in it. They that wait upon the
Lord will renew their strength. The word wait there means to expectantly prepare.
Remember that Nelson Mandela quote that I gave you yesterday? If you didn't watch
yesterday, you're going to want to go back and watch it. What did he say? He said,
you will never prepare for what you secretly believe is not going to happen.
So the proof of belief is action. The proof of belief is preparation. So if I
go and sit in a waiting room somewhere, what does that tell you about me? It
tells you that I don't believe that it's my time. It tells you that I don't really
believe that this is going to happen. A lot of people will say, well, if God wants
it for me, then he's going to do it for me. If God wants me to have a man, then
he's going to deliver me a man. I'll just wait here until God brings him to me.
That's not the way it works. The way it works is that you put your faith on
something, you get your hopes up, and that turns into faith. And you put your
faith on something. And then faith, the proof of faith is action. Faith without
action is what? It's dead religion, isn't it? Faith without action is dead
religion. And so don't tell me what you believe. Show me what you believe. And so
the word wait there means I'm going to expectantly prepare for what I already
believe is going to show up. I don't know when it's going to show up, and I don't
know how it's going to show up. That's God's part. But my part is to get ready
for it. I have one earthly child, and I have one child in heaven. I was pregnant
with my earthly child, and I gave birth to her. She came all the way into the
earth realm through this body. God knit her together in my womb. And when I found
out that she was in there, I already knew. I instinctively knew, hey, I'm carrying a
child. And when I found out she was in there, the doctor confirmed to me, yes,
you are pregnant with promise. You are pregnant with promise. And then what
happens? With every promise, there's a process. When God gives us a promise, He
invites us into a process. Same with a human gestation promise. When the doctor
told me, hey, you know, you're pregnant. You're gestating a child.
I didn't just go sit in his waiting room after the appointment.
I didn't just go out there and sit in his waiting room and rock back and forth
and wait for my promise to come.
The nurses would have come out and been like, Hey, we're closing up.
What are you doing here? Oh, the doctor said I was pregnant. Yeah.
Well, I'm waiting for the baby. That's ridiculous, right?
We would never do that.
But a lot of times that's what we do when we believe we had a promise from God.
We just go sit in his waiting room. Well, God'll do it, I guess. You know,
when he wants it, it'll happen. If God wants it, if it's his will,
it will come to pass. No,
I left that doctor's office and I went and I put action behind my
belief. I began to prepare for that child.
I began to buy little clothes and decorate a nursery and do all kinds of things
because I believed it wasn't about if it was only about when.
And so many of you have bought into this religious idea of waiting instead of
expectantly preparing. And I want to shift that for you,
not just during this challenge,
but I'd love for you to come into my program because we have,
we help people get wins so many people in so many areas of their lives.
They've been waiting for so long.
And if you wait for too long and you're not actually taking action on the
promises of God, what will happen is, is you'll stop believing in them.
You'll start losing hope. You'll start getting disgruntled.
And maybe you'd never admit it to yourself or to anyone else,
but you start getting mad at God.
You start believing that there really isn't anything to this and that it's not
true. That's what happens. Okay.
That's where the scripture comes in that says that that faith, that,
that hope deferred makes the heart sick, right? That's what that is.
But hope is supposed to take action. So don't defer your hope.
Don't postpone your hope until you have evidence that it's true.
The word postpone means to suspend something until it's proven.
Don't defer. You're the one that defers.
God's not deferring and it is going to make you heart sick.
It's going to break your heart. And guess what? Broken hearts look for medication.
And then you're going to just start feeding your feelings.
You're going to start sitting around. You're going to start complaining.
You're going to start doing all kinds of stuff because now you have a broken
heart that's looking for medication.
You might go off with Prince Alarming instead of Prince Charming because if
God's not going to bring him,
then you're going to go get them yourself in the wrong way.
And so all kinds of stuff happens when we let this thing start beginning of us
waiting around instead of us taking action. God said it. Do you believe it?
Prove it. Take action. That's what needs to happen.
And so the second reason that people are single is because there's too many
distractions. Once again, all this self-medicating is part of that distractions.
We get really distracted when we're disappointed because we start just trying to
shove everything into that place of the promise to try to make us forget how
upset and hurting that we are, right? It's not good.
And then the third, we've gotten into bad habits of isolation.
We really don't let people in. We don't let people into our lives.
We're really isolated, suspicious, controlling in a lot of ways,
especially women.
All of my women clients are in some sort of independent energy.
Want to help you step out of that.
Want to step into a place where you can partner.
Men are attracted to women that are open to partnership and that's not something
you can fake. You can't fake it till you make it.
It's kind of like a homing signal.
It's like a beacon that you're sending out of the divine feminine. You guys,
those are not new age words.
Those are biblical words that the new agers have hijacked from us.
All right.
And they're out here working it and manifesting good things in their lives.
And we're sitting here in waiting rooms,
waiting for God to do something that he already did on the finished work of the
cross. And so we've got to, we've got to get into a kingdom mindset, y'all.
We have to get into a kingdom mindset. All right.
So we're not letting people around us.
We have alligator moats built around our hearts. It's like, I dare you.
I double dog dare you to try to come and approach me.
And the good guys are not climbing walls. Ladies. If you build walls,
good guys are not going to be attracted to that. If you're walled off, right?
If you're suspicious, if you're controlling the good men, the mature men,
the masculine men, they're going to steer clear of you, right?
Because Proverbs tells us something very clearly. Proverbs 17, 19.
If you build a wall, you actually attract a thief.
So the very men that you're trying to keep out with those walls are the very men
that are coming. Remember Olivia Pope and scandal.
I know I shouldn't have been watching that show. All right,
but don't judge me because I didn't know how bad it was until I was hooked.
And this is another way that we medicate ourselves.
We start watching all kinds of stuff we shouldn't watch.
And it starts creating crap inside of our hearts that shouldn't be there.
But anyway, for those of you that saw scandal back in the day,
she said to a very married president, by the way, y'all,
if he's married, he's not your spirit mate. He's not your promise.
You're not the solution to his problems. I don't care how upset he is.
I don't care how miserable he is in his marriage.
You need to go take your hands off something that belongs to someone else.
So God can give you something that belongs to you.
So to a very married president, the character,
Olivia Pope says to him, if you want me, then you got to earn.
or me, right? She's this protagonist that's all walled off and she's the ice queen and
it's like, you know, so sexy and the men are drawn to it because they want to conquer her.
Only the bad men, only the bad men want to conquer you. Only the bad men want to scale
your walls up to your bedroom window. The thieves, Proverbs 17, 19 is very clear. The
thieves like the walls, the good men don't. So we got to take the walls down. We got to
build a bridge where the good men can come over and they can knock on the door, right?
And we can open the door to our heart to them. So it's time to let down the walls. It's time
to let them down. All right, so here is day two. I'm going to do a little recap of day
one, that banner verse. I promised you two banner verses over this movement. This is
what God spoke to me in 2020, Jeremiah 6, 16, the ancient of days, God, he has ancient
ways. You guys, all of our lives, it's going to be about getting into a place where we're
doing things God way, God's way. So we can have abundance in every area of your life.
I can't tell you how good the kingdom life is. Do I still have problems? Sure. There's
there's still warfare that comes against me a hundred percent, but you guys, the kingdom
life is the best life and doing things according to God's ways and not my own and not the church
ways because they ain't been, they ain't been working for nobody. All right. Religion ain't
been working for nobody. That's why Jesus came. John 10, 10 is about setting you free
from religion. Just so you know, the thief to come to steal and kill and destroy is not
the devil. Read the entire chapter. It's the shepherds, the bad shepherds that want to
keep people in bondage and control them with the law of religion. Jesus said, me, I'm the
way, the truth and the life, right? All you that are heavy laden, weary, come to me and
I will give you rest. What are they heavy laden and weary with? The law, religion, read
your Bible. Don't just read your Bible. All right. So we want to do things the kingdom
way. We want to do things, the finished work of the cross way, including our love lives.
So the ancient of days has ancient ways. And for a lot of us, modern ways of dating has
not worked out for us. And I don't have time to get into the history of dating or where
it even came from, but it's not biblical as you all know. And that's why it is hard because
it just wasn't our divine design. It wasn't, but we got to make best. We've got to make
the best of it because God matched us with the year 2024. We could have been born in
any other timeline, but we're not, we're born right now. And so we've got to take what modern,
the modern age is trying to give us, and we've got to apply God's ancient ways to it. And
that's what we do in last year single program. We help you to date in an ancient way using
modern tools and so successful for so many people. So a lot of us are longing for simpler
times, especially in the area of love. And remember this verse goes on to say, I will
show you the good path. And if you take it, your peace, your Shalom will increase. And
that is a word that just means the devouring of chaos and confusion. So we need that chaos
and confusion to get out of our lives. And the way that we're going to do that is to
do God's better way. God has a better way. He does. And we implement something in our
community called the six degrees of separation, which just means that every single person
in the world is only six people away from you, which means that somebody knows somebody
that knows somebody that knows your spirit mate. And so your love story is going to be
supernatural. It is your love story is going to have a supernatural element. You're going
to play a part in it, but God's going to play a part in it. And it's not a 50 50 split.
It's about you being obedient. It's about you turning away from what doesn't work, turning
away from cultural ways and modern ways and broken ways and turning towards God's way.
And you partnering with a supernatural platform like ours. And if there's another one, then
that one. But the bottom line is, is that coming into agreement with what God's doing
your life, because he's drawing you into this marriage season. And so you're partnering
with that. You're giving God permission to do what only he can do when you do what only
you can do. So let's start getting ready for those divine appointments. Let's start
getting ready for those community matchmaking community-based matchmaking moments. Let's
start getting ready for those with our second banner verse of the movement, which is from
song of songs chapter two. So if you want to turn there, you can get there. Um, I've
heard this scripture, this passage of scripture all the time at women's conferences and here
and there and everywhere when it has to do with women, right? This is kind of like the
women's Anthem chapter of song of songs, but I actually put a portion of this on my
bouquets at my own wedding for all the single women. Instead of throwing one bouquet, I
gave out bouquets to all the single women with a portion of this scripture on it. So
I'm going to read, we'll read a little bit of it here to you. So song of songs, chapter
two, verse starting at verse 13. If you want to get there, who's learning something great
today, who's feeling Holy Spirit speaking to me and through me to you.
Your heart today. Who's feeling that? Yes, yes, yes, yes.
I know you are. Cause I'm feeling it. Okay. Can you not discern?
I love it when God asks us questions, right? That's,
that's how I learned so much from the Lord.
I'll just be going about my business, doing my thing. And God's like, Hey,
what do you think about this? Don't you think this is weird? And I'm like,
yeah, that's weird. What's up with that? He asked me a question.
And then I started asking him questions about what he asked me.
He gets me critically thinking, right? Not just with my head,
but with my spirit, with my heart. And that's what's happening here.
Can you not discern this new day of destiny that's breaking forth all around
you? Do you know what time it is, girl? Do you know what time it is?
That's what that's saying.
The early signs of my purposes and plans are bursting forth.
I want you just to picture this, this,
this picture in your mind of what's happening here.
The budding vines of new life are now blooming everywhere.
The fragrance of their flowers is whispering.
There is change in the air. Woo. What's happening.
Springtime has hit your heart.
All the barren wasteland of the past and your experiences that is giving way to
a budding vine full of potential, full of blooming. What is that?
That's a super bloom.
You've been dead and desolate in your heart for a long time.
And now there's signs of life poking up out of the ground in these areas where
nothing has grown in a really long time.
The fragrance of their flowers is whispering. There's change in the air.
Arise, my love, my beautiful companion and run with me.
Don't walk, run with me to the higher place.
We're being invited to have a definite, a definitely different perspective,
a higher perspective, a kingdom perspective. That's what, that's that,
that's that Jeremiah 6, 16 good path, right? God's ways are above our ways.
He said, ancient of days has ancient ways. My ways are above your ways.
My thoughts are above your thoughts,
but we're even being invited to come into that place, that higher place.
For now is the time to arise and come away with me. When is the time tomorrow?
Next week, next month, next year? No, now, now is the time.
Now I want to go to the next scripture 14 for you are my dove
hidden in the split open rock.
It was I who took you and hid you up high in the secret stairway of the sky.
Some of you have been wondering, Hey, you know,
why have I been single for so long?
Is it possible that God has set you aside for such a time as this?
Esther, is it time? Is it time for you to partner now?
Maybe it wasn't until now that your love story was supposed to begin.
And here's the good news. It will be accelerated.
If you have waited until your fourth, fifth,
sixth decade to have a partnership, it doesn't mean that God forgot you.
It just means that this is what's written in your story.
He hid you in the secret place. Why?
So that you could get the information that you needed in order to not just be
successful, but to sustain that success, not just for you,
but for your lineage and legacy coming after you.
I didn't meet my spirit mate until I was in my thirties and I had lots of
wrecked up relationships before that, right? A lot of people don't get married,
don't meet their spirit mate until they're in their forties or fifties.
It doesn't mean you weren't married before.
You just didn't meet your spirit mate. And some of you have been widowed.
You were married to a spirit mate and now they've gone on to their next
assignment in heaven. And I feel like they're,
I believe that they're fully participating in this new love
story and spirit mate that's coming to you.
I believe that they're part of the intercession team that's bringing this love
story to your door. Okay?
It's like a continuation of that assignment that they are no longer on earth
to help you with. So what happens next?
Let me see your radiant face and hear your sweet voice.
How beautiful your eyes of worship and lovely your voice and prayer.
You guys, the divine feminine is soft. She's gentle.
It doesn't mean she's not a leader. It doesn't mean she's a doormat.
It doesn't mean she's subservient or some kind of toxic form of submissive.
That doesn't mean any of that.
What it means is that there's a gentleness of our spirit where we are a
safe place for our families, including our husbands.
And you can see how he's talking to her, that she is that safe place,
your radiant face, your soft voice, your beautiful eyes.
And then this is where I wanted to get to the chapter two, verse 15.
You must catch the troubling foxes. It's just kind of comes out of nowhere.
It's like, here's the day. The day of destiny is dawning.
Everything's blooming all around you. Potential is bursting forth.
All this stuff is happening, right?
And then you must catch the troubling foxes,
those sly little foxes that hinder our relationship.
For they raid our budding vineyard of love to ruin what I've
planted within you. Will you catch them and remove them from me?
We will do it together.
That's where I want to get to for today. Day 2 is teaching. What's going on here?
The foxes, they're coming into this beautiful blossoming day of destiny,
and they're ruining this budding vineyard of love.
You guys, buds are potential. Buds aren't blossoms, and they're not fruit.
The way a plant works is it buds, and then it blossoms, and then it fruits.
And so what's happening here is, what's it saying?
I've already planted this love story within you.
He's saying that these foxes are ruining the potential of the love story.
They're eating the buds before the buds blossom or fruit.
Before you can get fruit in your love story, not just here, but also here and here,
these foxes, whatever they are, are destroying this love story.
Where is this love story? It's already written. It's already planted within you.
It's already there. It's already intact. It's there.
But before it has a chance to mature and bear fruit in your life, it's being raided.
It's being raided by these foxes. Failure doesn't destroy potential, y'all.
It destroys confidence. So all these failures, all these traumas,
all these things are coming, and they are destroying the love story
that God has already written for you.
They're trying to keep it from ever maturing and ever manifesting in your life.
But then he says something really great. He says,
Will you catch them? This is where the proof of belief takes action.
This is where you do your part. Will you catch them?
But then he goes on to say, In the very next breath, we will do it together.
You have to say yes. You have to do it.
But then grace, the empowerment of heaven, will meet you there.
You're in a beautiful season of your life like never before,
where Holy Spirit is standing by, ready to partner with you to do what?
To catch these thieves of abundance.
To get them out of the budding vineyard of love that's already been planted within you.
And that's not just romantic love. That's God's love for you.
That's your identity as a daughter of God.
That's all the abundance of John 10.10 that Jesus died to give you.
That's all and all and all, y'all. So we'll do it together.
The grace is now for you. Holy Spirit is here to help you
to unpack those heart boxes and catch those foxes
and reveal what has been holding you back and keeping you stuck
in so many areas of your life for so long. All right?
Okay. So we got those foxes. We understand.
There's cracks in the foundation. That's what those foxes are.
Can't hold up the weight of intimacy. It can't.
God wants to restore these things in our lives.
So obviously when we think about these foxes,
these things that are robbing us of joy and peace and abundance,
robbing us of breakthrough, we immediately think of our big traumas.
At least I do. And that's not what the Scripture says.
It says those sly little foxes.
Here in America, we have a saying, sly as a fox.
What does that mean? Sneaky, undetectable.
Foxes roam around at night when you can't see them, right?
And they're little. They're small. You guys, I have foxes on my property.
I do and I've seen them. And you know what else they are besides sneaky
and out at night and small? They're also kind of cute.
They're really cute. In fact, when you see them, you don't even think
of them as a threat. You're like, oh, did you see the fox?
It was really cute, right? Yeah, because you don't see its little sharp teeth.
It's little furry paws. You don't see its claws.
And so you think that it's cute. So let's look at the nature of foxes
because God doesn't just choose words to choose words.
These words mean things. So they're deceptive.
These things that are holding you back from abundance in your life
and especially your love story, they're deceptive things.
You might not be able to see them. They're sneaky things.
These super cute things, things that you're proud of about yourself, right?
I'm independent. I don't need a man. That could be a fox.
Because guess what? You don't just want a man. You need a man.
The Bible says very clearly that we need each other.
We don't just want each other. We need each other.
And if you cannot allow your own mouth to say that you need,
then there's a fox there. There's a heart wound there.
There's a block there. What are they?
They're blind spots. They're filters created by trauma.
Trauma doesn't just hurt us. It creates different versions of us.
They could be cultural norms. All of us were raised in different eras.
I was raised, I was born in the seventies.
I was a kid in the eighties and I was a teenager in the nineties.
There was a lot of things that I was taught from culture that are not good.
The empowerment, women's empowerment movement started in the seventies.
I was born smack dab in the middle of it.
A woman doesn't need a man. A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.
All that was ingrained inside of me.
These are all things that could be foxes, right?
Cultural norms versus ancient ways.
They could be undetectable things, things that you consider good.
Things like if you're from the purity culture, dating is only for mating.
How's that working out for you? And you're like, what's the purity culture?
You don't want to know. All right. You don't want to know.
It basically was this entire ideology that you just sit in the waiting room.
And if God wants a husband or wife for you, then he'll bring them.
And he'll make it abundantly clear. And you'll know immediately.
Don't you hate when people say that? Well, how am I going to know?
Oh, you know,
it, you'll know when you know what that doesn't,
that's not how it works for like 99.9% of people.
And if that is what your expectation is, that it has to feel like,
you're going to be like next, next, next, next. Why?
Because you don't have the feeling you, the heavens don't open.
This is your husband in whom I'm well pleased.
It doesn't work like that for 99.9% of the people.
Some people say they knew from the first moment,
but then there's other people that said, Oh,
I know that this is my person. And then it ends up not being their person.
It's like, well, how do we sort this out?
That's what I want to teach you in my program,
because religion is keeping people single. It is.
It's giving people serious anxious or avoidant attachment.
And we got to get rid of that. That's a Fox family mantras.
You might be raised in a family that tells you that there's only one right way
to do something. It doesn't matter what area of your life.
And you're still living in that. I had a girl the other day,
a woman the other day show up on one of my coaching calls and say that she
wants to do X, Y, Z, but she's afraid that her father won't approve.
I'm like, girl, how old are you? She's like 48. I'm like, listen,
I'm all for honoring your parents,
but there comes a point in time when you got to live your life and you got to
make your decisions and you can't make your decisions based on something your
dad wants or doesn't want for you. Okay.
And so this could be holding you back if you have all this family codependency
and boundaries that are all messed up pop culture,
because there's so many shows out there that the ideas that we don't realize
that we're unconsciously taking in from those shows are foxes.
They're holding us back. The music that you listen to,
maybe you listen to that angry woman music, you know,
that Kelly Clarkson music, that Adele music. You know, I love these people too.
That Rihanna music, Cardi B, all the things,
that music is going to get in your heart and create foxes.
All that music is all about how bad men are.
And so if you think that you're going to find the one good guy,
when you believe that all men are bad, no,
you're going to have walls up and you're going to be like, you know,
if you want me, earn me, and then you're going to get what you asked for,
which is not a good thing.
So we don't want to be listening to that music and taking that music in and
making that part of us. Guys, we're singing that music out.
We're confessing that music over our lives.
I'm not trying to over-spiritualize anything, but there is power in your words.
There is. And if you don't think that that's becoming things that you believe in
your heart,
you're wrong because the Bible says out of the mouth comes the communication of
the heart, out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth communicates, right?
So we got to make sure that we understand that. So these can all be foxes,
right? So I have compiled some lists of y'all's foxes,
all those cute little posts that we put up in this challenge group.
There's a method to our madness.
We put those up because depending on what you post there,
it becomes part of these lists. That's right.
We found some of your foxes and here they are. Lies that we believe about God.
He's not emotionally involved with me. He doesn't care about my love story.
I'm being punished. He's mad at me. He's disappointed in me. I've let him down.
Honey, you're not, you're not holding God up. You can't let him down. All right.
You might've let down an earthly parent and now you're personifying that to God,
but God is the one that's holding you up. In fact,
you're in him living and moving and having your very being.
You can't let him down. All right. I've offended God.
He doesn't want me to be happy. I want something God doesn't want for me.
It's not his will for me to be happy.
Relationship can't be good for him if it's not good for us.
That is what you need to know.
God's definition of relationship is it can't be good for him.
If it's not good for you,
he hasn't put you on this earth to live a miserable life just so that you can be
holy. God wants you to enjoy the gift he's given you called life, right?
He wants you to enjoy this gift. Why?
Because you're the only representation of God that this world's ever going to
see. And if you're broke and busted and disgusted,
then who's going to want to sign up?
Who's going to want to sign up to be God's kid if that's what God's kids look
like.
Your main purpose on this earth is to show the world what it looks like to be a
child of God, a daughter of God, and see how he treats his children. Okay?
We're blessed to be a blessing. We're not, we're not always going through,
going through the dark valley of the soul with gasoline underwear on.
That's not what your life should look like.
And if that's what your life always looks like, then there's a problem.
Every once in a while, you're going to have adversity. Jesus told us we would,
we're going to have trials. We're going to have tribulations,
but he said he'll deliver us out of them all.
Many are the adversities of the righteous, but I deliver them out of them all.
There's going to be trouble in this world, but be of good cheer.
I've overcome the world.
So if 99% of your life looks like dark valley of the soul,
dark night of the soul with, you know,
going through the fire with gasoline underwear on,
then you took the wrong road and we need to get you back on the good path. Okay?
He has a timing and if I get out of it, he won't have,
he won't give me what I want. God hates divorce, but in your mind,
that equals God hates divorced people.
I taught yesterday that God hates the reasons for divorce. He hates betrayal.
He hates infidelity. He hates those things.
wishes people wouldn't do those things, but because they do those things,
he's the one that created divorce.
God's the one that created divorce. It wasn't part of his original plan,
but he saw the way that specifically men were treating their wives.
They were abandoning them when a new model came out. Back in the day, y'all,
all you had to do was leave and shut your front door and you divorce that woman.
And then you went off and lived your own life and did whatever you want, right?
And then that woman couldn't remarry because anytime you wanted to,
you could just show back up and say, Oh, I see that you've been farming the land.
I see that you've been raising the kids and now they're farming the land.
And now this is worth some money. So I decided I want to come back home.
I want to take control of my possessions. You, God didn't want that.
He didn't like that. He didn't like the way men were treating women.
So he said, okay, Moses, give that woman a piece of paper.
If that man leaves saying that she's now divorced from him and he can't just
come back whenever he wants to. So now another man can marry her.
That's what happens.
God loved his daughters enough to create a way
out a rescue mission for you to get out of areas where you're being
abused. And so that's Bible. If you don't believe it,
I have a whole teaching on it and my divorce and remarriage segment in my
program that will set you free. God hates abuse. He hates oppression.
Okay. And that's why he hates divorce.
God loves his rules more than he loves his daughters.
You think that God's just this list of rules. And if you don't,
if you break them, then he doesn't love you anymore. That's not true.
God cares more about he, God cares more about me when I'm good.
Then when I'm bad, when I'm bad, when I'm good, he blesses me.
When I'm bad, he punishes me. My love life isn't important to God. Okay.
Here's some lies that you believe about men. All the good ones are taken,
just like toilet paper during COVID all gone forever, gone empty shelves.
This is why some of y'all are dating married men.
And I already touched on that via Holy Spirit during this challenge.
I don't always say stuff like that, but someone here needs to hear that. Okay.
Stop letting Olivia Pope be your role model. You need to stop with that. Okay.
And emotional affairs count too. Not just sexual be like, Oh,
I'm not having sex with them. Yeah.
That's what you're telling yourself to justify why you're someone's work wife
and why there are giving you all of their attention and affection and emotion.
And their wife is being left out in the cold at home because you are taking what
belongs to her.
You better release it and let go of it so that you can have something of your
own. All right. Men are not safe. They can't be trusted. They're all the same.
They're immature. They don't want to grow up. They only want one thing. Yes,
they do want sex and you should want it too. And if you don't want it,
then let's get to the root of why.
Why are you traumatized around the idea of a man wanting to be with you
intimately?
Probably because you've been used and abused in that area too many times.
But remember, we're going to save sex for covenant. We are,
but men do want sex and we can't criminalize them for it or villainize them for
it. But they should respect, they should treat us respectfully and honorably.
Okay. As they would their own bodies or their own lives. Right.
And that's what we want to see in spirit mates. Men are narcissists or cheaters,
abusers, liars, manipulators, violent, selfish, lazy, controlling, power hungry.
These are things y'all have said about men. Men don't hurt. They don't care.
They don't have feelings. They abandon. They don't provide, they don't protect.
They can't commit. They don't want what women want.
Why are you here wanting a man? If this is what you really believe about them,
we got to unpack this stuff because this is the kind of man you're going to
attract. As long as this is what you believe about men,
they're intimidated by successful, smart, strong, spiritual, beautiful women,
right? They're pathetic.
They're intimidated by women that are smart and have all the letters after
their name. I'm only single because I intimidate men.
Well, maybe you don't intimidate men.
Maybe you're intimidating and maybe we need to unpack that so that you can let go
of that toxic masculinity that you've been carrying and you can start operating
in your divine feminine. Men aren't interested in spiritual things.
They don't want God as much as women do.
They don't want God the same way as women do.
They weren't created or designed to want to worship the same way that we do.
And what we do is that we get so fearful that they don't love God because
they're not worshiping in the same way as we do. We become gift inspectors.
Does he speak in tongues? Does he roll around on the floor on the gold dust?
You know, for depending on what denomination you're to,
does he go to mass every day? You know, if you're Catholic, whatever,
whatever your denominations litmus test is, the spirituality,
you're going to be trying to apply that to a man, right?
Instead of being a fruit inspector, does he, does he have love and kindness?
Does he have joy? Is he patient? You know, be a fruit inspector.
Don't be a gift inspector. Fruit is indicative of relationship with God,
not gifts. Anybody can have gifts. Wolves in sheep's clothing have a lot of gifts.
And a lot of you have already, you've already been to that rodeo.
So you know what I'm talking about.
And here's the lies we believe about ourselves.
I have to settle if I want to be married. I've missed my opportunity, right?
My opportunity is gone. My standards are too high.
Your walls are currently too high, but not your standards.
I have to take care of myself. I have to protect myself. No,
I want to teach you how to be God defended instead of self defended so you can
let love in.
I'm not hard and bitter, I'm just smart and wise.
No.
I'm not guarded or closed off, I just have good boundaries.
No huh, no hun, that's not what's up.
I can't ask for help, because I have to be responsible.
Responsibility in that scenario is just a trauma response,
it's a fancy word for fear of trusting other people.
My picker is broken, I can't be trusted,
I'm a loser magnet, something is wrong with me,
I'm not good enough, I'm not smart enough,
rich enough, young enough, tall enough, short enough,
I'm not enough.
And some of you think I'm just too much.
You might be too much because you are always trying
to please, you're anxious attachment, right,
you're a people pleaser, you're just too much.
That is not your actual authentic identity.
All right, I can do this all on my own,
I don't need anybody else, I'm not meant to be married,
nobody wants me, I'm invisible, men aren't attracted to me,
I mess things up, I am a mess, I'm too old, it's too late,
I've been married too many times, I have too many problems,
nobody will love me and my kids,
I need to get it together before I can even get back
out there and meet anyone, all right?
So those are all foxes that we have been able to find
in the comments of this group, right?
Woo!
You guys ready to go fox hunting?
You ready to give God permission to help you?
Remember he said, you gotta do it, but he's here to help.
Are you ready to do that?
If you're ready to do that,
then I want you to read this permission slip,
I want you to speak this permission slip with me,
and I'm also gonna post it in the group.
You guys, own this permission slip.
This is you giving God permission to start
this supernatural process in your life.
And I really hope that this challenge is not the end of it,
that you come into the program, I'm gonna give everyone
an opportunity to join the program tomorrow,
it's very cost effective, y'all, it's really amazing,
it's gonna change and transform your life,
it's gonna transform your love life.
So many people have such crazy success with us.
So close your eyes, repeat after me,
Father God, I give you permission to search me
and to reveal anything in my heart
that does not belong to my true feminine identity.
Anything that is hindering me from living
the big, beautiful life that you created me to live.
Holy Spirit, I invite you into the darkest places
of my heart, show me the areas of my heart
that are still wounded and still hurting.
The areas that are blocking me from your goodness,
that are keeping me from stepping into my love story,
the one you have written for me.
When you reveal these broken places to me,
I covenant with you, I partner with you
to release them into your care
and to respond with forgiveness and repentance.
I set aside the season of my life
for a time of healing and wholeness
and I'm asking you, Holy Spirit,
to take charge of this process.
I ask that you dwell with me and in me,
I need you, I cannot do this on my own.
I wanna be free from the past,
free to be to who I truly am
and free to become who you've created me to be.
Show me the lies I believed about myself,
about my life, about my surroundings,
about men, about marriage,
even the lies I've believed about you, God.
Teach me the greater truth, teach me your ways
and teach me how to love and how to live abundantly.
And then my favorite prayer that I've been praying for years
that God taught me, very simple, very powerful,
teach me, show me, heal me, grow me.
I really wanna challenge you to look at that again,
yourself, pray it over yourself, confess it over yourself
if you really believe it and receive it.
Let that supernatural process start,
we've had so many testimonies just from this permission slip
and what starts to happen after you truly
surrender the pen to God, all right?
And there's a place to sign it,
if you wanna print it out, you can.
Sit and listen after you speak it over yourself,
let God talk to you, write down some things maybe
that he's saying to you, all right,
about what he wants to do in this season of your life
and I can't wait to see you tomorrow for day three.
Gonna talk about spirit mates versus soul mates,
gonna be a great time, how to tell if they're someone
that you need to go forward with
or you need to thanks next, all right?
I'll see you there, see you soon, bye-bye.