WEBVTT

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Good evening, guys.

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Can you hear me?

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Yes, sir.

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Hello.

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I was on a Zoom call earlier today,

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and for some reason, my microphone

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wasn't going the way I wanted it to do.

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And I just want to make sure.

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How's everybody doing tonight?

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Good, good.

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Thumbs up.

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Sound good?

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Good.

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I like it.

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Probably a couple other guys going to join us here pretty soon.

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And I'm even recording tonight, and that's something.

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I finally got that going.

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There was a post that was in the men's group

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that Jackie mentioned that some people had responded to,

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and they thought it was interesting.

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And so I thought we could start by discussing

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a little bit of this.

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And I haven't had a lot of time to really process it,

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but I thought we would just go ahead and look at this.

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Let me do this.

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Let me see if I can share my screen.

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Window.

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You guys see that?

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Yeah.

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Yes, sir.

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Yeah.

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I just saw that online.

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I was wondering if you guys chatted about it last week.

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I missed last week.

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No, no, we had not chatted about this,

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although it might have been posted as early as last week.

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But it was six days ago.

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It was posted July 2nd.

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So I kind of will react to some of the comments there.

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Let me get another view up here.

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OK, so now I can see you guys.

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I'm sharing this, so you can see this.

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So biblical order of the family.

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Anybody want to react to this immediately?

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I put in my immediate reaction.

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It just brought back a weird memory.

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A weird memory?

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Yeah, it's in there.

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My ex-wife didn't really do it.

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You made a comment on the post?

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I did.

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Oh, OK.

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Go ahead.

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My ex-wife can go to church that much,

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but one of the times she did, the preacher taught on this.

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And she came home very mad and saying,

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no, the wife is supposed to be on top,

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and it should be the children, and then

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Jesus, and then the husband.

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And she was just fighting on it.

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And it just brought back the memory of this big,

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long argument she had.

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And her point being, as in the wife should be on top?

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Yeah, no one should be above her.

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Like literally.

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Literally.

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Even God.

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Interesting.

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And the church had it all wrong.

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And the church was teaching wrong.

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Oh, I see.

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So that was just like a big stiff arm up,

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like no, hard no, hard pass.

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Exactly, yeah.

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Just turn everything on its head and whatever.

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Right, and then she got my daughters to agree with her,

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or at least my oldest daughter at the time.

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So that's a traumatic response to this vision.

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Right.

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It's obviously very important and very specific,

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and I get that.

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I haven't quite had anybody turn it on its head like that.

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Yeah, the reason I'm sharing this is not really to be like,

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hey, this is right, or this is a perfect example,

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or anything like that.

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I think the illustration is just there.

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And there's a lot of different ways

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that you can interpret this from different perspectives.

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And I think it has a lot to do with where your family history

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lies, where you have your immediate experience in maybe

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a marriage relationship that you've had previous.

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different things speak into that. So anybody else have a reaction to this?

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I did. I just, yeah, I've definitely was taught that evangelical kind of view of the husband being,

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you know, but, and then, you know, and over, I just feel it feels like,

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feels like a lot of pressure, feels like it could be used for abuse. I just feel like, you know,

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the Bible also talks about submit one to another. And I've kind of adopted more of an egalitarian

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view that I feel in my current relationship is really empowering to both of us. And I don't

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think it's unbiblical. I just think that is kind of black and white. So it kind of is a constricting

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feeling that comes up in me. Like, I have to do all those things. I mean, for example, the woman

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I'm dating right now, I mean, she makes, if she worked full time, she'd make more money than me.

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And I'm, that's fine with me. You know what I mean? More resources, you know, I don't have to

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be the one that the sole breadwinner or even the primary breadwinner. It doesn't, I don't know,

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it feels like it, it can be used to feed ego. Those are some of my thoughts. Yeah. Okay.

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I like the umbrella picture. I think it's a great picture of the covering. And I think,

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you know, we can dig into, you know, who's in charge and all that fun stuff. But I just,

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you know, from a high level, I like the Christ, Jesus is our covering, you know, we all need

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that. Right. And then you get into the Ephesians five thing. And I don't know, I, when men,

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you know, dominate, I think that's, that's taking it, you know, way to the extreme end.

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But I think, you know, there is, God made us a certain way. He hardwired us a certain way.

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And I think a lot of women want to be led in a loving way. I think Ephesians five is clear about

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love and respect that works both ways. So it wasn't triggering for me. I also had my ex-wife

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hated that book from Emerson Eckridge, Love and Respect. But I think he hit some, some good

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points with that. And it kind of reminded me of that concept.

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Interesting. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it is, it is umbrellas. It's not like it's a tier of anvils,

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like, you know, like weight with like, you know, like freaking like metal,

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like steel plates or anything. It is, you know, an umbrella image. So there's some thought there.

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I think that's, yeah, I think that's interesting. Thank you for sharing that, Justin. Who else?

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Thomas, you actually responded on the, in the, in the chat there on the Facebook. What's,

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what's your thoughts? Oh, man.

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It's okay. Let's go there. I mean,

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so this comes from Bill Gathard and the Institute for Basic Life Principles,

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which was a cult that my family was in. Oh, this image does. Yes. And, and I think,

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you know, I really want to respect what people are saying. You know what, what you said, Justin,

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what was said kind of in some of the comments about appreciating it. I think that I appreciate

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that all things are lawful, but not all things are profitable. And I think that kind of like all,

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I have, I have seen it used in ways that are inappropriate. I think, you know, even talking

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about how it's an umbrella, I think from the starting place is not to me, you know,

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kind of the most helpful view that's available. So I don't, I don't view life as a rainstorm.

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And I also don't think that rain, unlike the way that Bill Gathard taught it is a bad thing.

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Rain is a symbol of blessing in the Bible. Yeah, sure. And so I think that this in my family and

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in a lot of other families led to the idea that the wife doesn't have direct access to Christ.

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The provide for the family aspect was used to diminish Proverbs 31, that talks about women

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being allowed to engage in business. There are, I think, this was used also to the person who

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created this or the person who promulgated it the most, his view was that, you know,

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the most important commandment in the Bible was to honor your authorities.

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And that if anything was based on the fourth of the 10 commandments and that

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it was the most important thing in the Bible to honor your authorities.

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And I think that that was the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the,

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And that commandment is, honor your father and mother that it may go well with you.

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And so his view is that if there's anything not perfect in your life,

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it's because you are not honoring your authorities enough.

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And that really was a recipe for extreme distress in my life.

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And it wasn't enough even just to obey.

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You needed to anticipate what your authorities wanted and to do it without being asked.

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And I think that there's the question of like, okay, well, but do we have to

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use that person's perspective on this? Can some of this be salvaged?

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But I personally really feel like this is destructive.

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And I agree in the idea of covering.

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I, you know, I love what you said, Paul, that submitting to each other,

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although I'm more open to the idea that because of the fall,

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men are to lead the family, but to do it in a way that reflects Jesus in the church,

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you know, as Paul wrote about things along those lines.

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But I personally would rather see a kind of image where there's like a platform

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where Jesus is the foundation, which I feel like is the more biblical image.

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And then Jesus builds a platform for us, you know,

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and that husbands build a platform for their wives,

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you know, and that parents build a platform for their kids.

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So I think I appreciate the heart of people who share this diagram,

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I think, and who want good things for themselves and for others and are trying to be loving.

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But I think similar to some other things,

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I personally feel like the spiritual residue of this is really damaging.

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And I think really has led a lot of evil into the church.

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Um, yeah, I honestly don't know.

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I think this came across my wife's attention,

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and I think she posted it for the purposes of just like sheer reaction discussion.

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Yeah, right.

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So just to be clear on that.

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Yeah, so basically what I'm hearing you guys say is just the general,

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just like, especially the sort of like, no, this isn't right,

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or this is triggering, whatever.

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Um, it's, it's the imagery, it's the basic, it's the basic structure of the imagery.

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It's the, it's the, it's the composition of the visual that,

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and then all that it implies based on, you know, some history of abuse and trauma

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and that kind of thing in a religious environment that really kind of is triggering,

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which I get, trust me, I get it.

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I've been there, done that as well with the best of them.

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I encourage you not to say that you get other people suffering in that way.

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I'm not sure that you get the suffering that.

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I'm not saying I get your suffering.

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I'm just saying I understand religious oppression.

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I would never say unless I know a person very well and in person,

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and I went through something with that person that I'm like,

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hey, I understand what you're going through.

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So I'm not saying you, I'm just saying in general,

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you understand what I'm saying, Thomas?

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I think I have more of an idea.

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Okay.

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I can relate to it.

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What's that?

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Like you can relate to it, you mean?

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I can relate to the idea of, um, a lot of abuse that has taken place in our modern church.

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There's a lot of variations and a lot of different, um,

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situations and a lot of specificity with that.

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But I mean, I went to a big megachurch and the guy that I went to a big megachurch right now

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is, um, not facing any kind of legal thing,

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but there's a big thing on social media going around him about a, uh,

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a recording of him and his staff meeting, just literally berating his staff members.

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And it was very difficult for me because I've been in those meetings

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in that exact situation.

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And here it is still happening decades later.

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And I, my heart breaks, my heart breaks for the people in that situation.

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My heart breaks for, um, my time that I spent there because it's bittersweet

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in the sense that there was a strong spiritual heritage and theological heritage and impartation

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and God moving in my life during that season.

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There was also a lot of, um, repression and religious fervor and just dogmatic, um,

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adherence to authority, just like somebody else said, mentioned earlier,

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like authority is like a big thing.

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Do this or else, or, you know, um, or you're out of it.

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It's the biggest thing I experienced.

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was not necessarily, nobody ever said directly really damaging things. They would say it very

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indirectly. And then the takeaway of what you heard that was said is just as powerful as what

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was said. So for instance, if in the case of like giving, that's like a big, huge, you know,

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hot button thing, like money in the church and, you know, like getting people to like give and

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donate all that kind of stuff. If you said something like, if you don't give in this

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offering, you're not going to get a miracle. You're not going to be blessed or you're not

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going to be, have the blessings of God in your life. Nobody would say those exact words,

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but they would paint a picture in sermonizing and really inspiring words and scripture.

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And the takeaway would be, you'd leave that meeting going, boy, I really wish I would've,

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I wish I really could've given. I really wish I had that money to give because if I did,

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I could get my miracle. If I did, boy, I tell you what, I could, I could have a breakthrough.

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I could have a blessing. It wasn't ever said, if you don't do this, this, you know, this what,

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but the takeaway. And to me, I think that is just as responsible. People are responsible for their

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words and their incorrect theology, but they're also correct. They're also accountable for their,

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their sort of very thin line preaching that the takeaway then becomes inerrancy.

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You walk away thinking something different than was supposedly was told to you on its face.

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And quite honestly, it was a manipulation because you're supposed to kind of walk away with that

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because, oh, I never said it, but you're supposed to walk away with the feeling of,

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I wasn't enough. I didn't have enough. I didn't do enough. I didn't come ready.

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I'm going to miss my thing. I'm not going to get my answer. All of that.

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That's the, that's the specific kind of religion I grew up in.

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So then you carry that on the rest of your life. Now you're like, I just had,

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I just had a counseling appointment this morning. And my counselor was like, what do you feel like?

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Sometimes I feel like, yeah, I feel like there are a lot of times I'm not enough. That's one

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of the phrases, one of the negative talks in my head. I'm not enough. Never enough. You do 59

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things, but should have done that one other things to make it 60 and you didn't do it enough.

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Not enough. You know, you're not what we had wanted. You're great. You're great at all this

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other stuff, but it's really not what we want. That's difficult guys. How many of you have that

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same sort of like testimony and same response, same kind of, yeah, you know, you get it.

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So when I say Thomas that I get it, that's what I mean when I get it. I'm like, yeah, I get it.

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The idea of covering, I will tell you this in my personal experience,

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I failed at my first marriage. And like I told you guys before, I said, you know, it's like

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in the context of where I was living, what I was doing at the time, I was on full-time ministry.

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And on paper, like I said, in the context of that, I looked like the good guy

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and my wife left me basically. Right. But I failed my family.

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I could have led my family better in a way that I didn't. This is what Jackie says all the time.

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And this is a really good quote, I think. Being so agenda driven,

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like you're putting agenda ahead of relationship.

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What is it in my first marriage that my wife didn't have, didn't see, didn't get,

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didn't know about me, that I didn't give her, that would have saved that relationship?

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And given my children, original parents that didn't get divorced, and what would that have

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looked like? What could I have done differently in the season of life that I was in

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to make that different? That's come back to me. I've had to process it. I've had to think about

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that. And then I've also had to live that out in a second marriage where those issues were also

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present. It's not like all my issues went away because I got divorced, because my wife left me.

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Now I'm the good guy.

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Now I get to get married again.

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Ah-ha-ha.

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Great.

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And everything's wonderful.

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You hear what I'm saying?

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So one of the things, though, I will tell you

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is that you all know Jackie.

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You all have a certain perception of her.

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And she's a very strong woman.

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She's very capable.

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She's good with words.

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She's very, she's definitely a leader.

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She is a, she's a visionary.

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She's just, you know, she's an amazing, inspiring woman.

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Absolutely.

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And she's strong in our family as well.

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It's not like, you know, if you think it's like, you know,

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she just sits back and like, oh, you're the husband.

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And you just tell us what, you know, like, she

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has to work at that a little bit.

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You know, she has to like, OK, I have to like bring this

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to David.

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Let's pray about it.

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She could just like bulldoze and just go through and just

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make decisions.

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Hey, that's what we're doing, blah, blah, blah, blah, right?

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But she does, because she's trying to,

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step back and like, you know, hey,

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she sees the value of me taking a lead role,

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me having any kind of initiative,

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me having any kind of spiritual propulsion myself.

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So that's one of the greatest things I think I can tell you

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is that like, I feel like there's a lot of men,

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maybe not necessarily on this call,

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but there's a lot of men in this world that aren't leading.

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By example, they're not leading with their own relationship

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with the Lord.

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They're not leading in life in these ways.

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And I feel like they're, not only are they missing out,

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but we, the rest of us, our world,

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are their families, their wives, potential wives,

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girlfriends, their co-workers, the people that

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are in their lives are missing out on their leadership.

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They're missing out on the level of responsibility

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that men have, which is played out

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in one of the greatest roles in the role of a husband.

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So I think one of the things that like, OK, the visual here

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can be very difficult, but aside from the visual,

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if you're talking about sort of this subject area with like,

305
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you know, where is the weight of responsibility

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on everybody's role, specifically

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for men and for husbands, I just had a, well, I'll say,

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I'll just let me finish my sentence.

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For men, we are, I feel responsible.

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Now that can be a very heavy laden word.

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I can lay it on thick and make it

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sound really bad and terrible and like, you know,

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you're not measuring up and so forth.

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But what I mean by that is, I don't mean an abusive, heavy,

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like, you're responsible.

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Like, you need to like, do this.

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Like, if I were to point to this umbrella image, look,

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see, you're the husband.

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You're supposed to do this.

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You're supposed to provide.

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I could beat you up with that all day long.

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But I don't think there's any value in that.

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But I actually don't even think that that's

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even the scriptural premise of all of that, these concepts.

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But I do think there is an accepting of responsibility.

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And you all know my friend Dan O. McCollum, Dan McCollum.

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You might know him.

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He's a well-known prophet and speaker

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in prophetic circles and different kinds of churches.

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But he spoke on Sunday at our church.

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And he talked about two kinds of responses to the modern world,

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the modern trouble and darkness that's present in our world.

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We all are familiar.

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There's politics.

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You've got economy.

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You've got societal.

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You've got all the issues of the day.

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You've got all the things.

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We all don't have to go into depth

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about the trouble and the darkness and all the stuff

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that's in our world today.

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And then what is our response as believers?

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What is our response as Christians?

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And he goes, I feel like there's two responses generally

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that Christians are doing with some variability.

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He goes, I feel like, and he pulled from a story

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from Hezekiah, where Hezekiah, I don't know the story very well.

348
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But Hezekiah.

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showed the wealth of his kingdom to his enemies.

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And his response after that was, because he was asked about it,

351
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he said, did you show him everything?

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And he goes, oh, yeah, I showed him everything.

353
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I showed him all of it.

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I showed him all the stuff.

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And he was judged by that.

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And it was a prophetic word given

357
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that said that because you did that, now your enemies will

358
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come in and steal this from you.

359
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And it's going to be taken all from you.

360
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And here is the interesting part of the story.

361
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Hezekiah's response was, not my problem,

362
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because it's not going to happen in my lifetime.

363
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Now, you can go back and read this story if you want to,

364
00:25:48.760 --> 00:25:50.360
and sort of get all the details.

365
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But the general idea is, nah, I'm good.

366
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It's not my problem, because it's not going to affect me.

367
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And that was the first sort of way

368
00:26:01.080 --> 00:26:03.800
that Dana was just preaching this sermon on Sunday,

369
00:26:03.800 --> 00:26:06.600
talking about, hey, one of the responses

370
00:26:06.600 --> 00:26:09.000
he feels like we're getting a lot from believers

371
00:26:09.000 --> 00:26:13.960
is the feeling of just abdication.

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Like, yeah, the world may be dark.

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The world may be going to hell in a handbasket, in a sense.

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But not my problem.

375
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I'm good.

376
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I'm saved.

377
00:26:22.480 --> 00:26:24.040
I'm righteous.

378
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I got things going for me.

379
00:26:25.360 --> 00:26:27.280
I'm going to make it to heaven.

380
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The people I care about are going to make it to heaven.

381
00:26:30.640 --> 00:26:32.320
And so be it.

382
00:26:32.320 --> 00:26:34.600
Yeah, those people, man, they're getting, man,

383
00:26:34.600 --> 00:26:38.480
those people are bad people, wicked people.

384
00:26:38.480 --> 00:26:39.920
Serves them right.

385
00:26:39.920 --> 00:26:42.280
They get what they deserve, being wicked like they are

386
00:26:42.280 --> 00:26:43.840
and going, you know what I'm saying?

387
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Like, that's kind of a certain one camp

388
00:26:48.000 --> 00:26:50.640
of sort of like general Christianity of like,

389
00:26:50.640 --> 00:26:55.120
not my problem, not my deal.

390
00:26:55.120 --> 00:27:00.880
And he said, and the other way is when you're talking

391
00:27:00.880 --> 00:27:02.600
about darkness and light.

392
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And if you look at darkness as the absence of light,

393
00:27:11.160 --> 00:27:12.680
we are encouraged to what?

394
00:27:12.680 --> 00:27:18.200
To be, what is it?

395
00:27:18.200 --> 00:27:22.840
Light in the darkness.

396
00:27:22.840 --> 00:27:31.680
And so if we conceal or cover our light, what are we doing?

397
00:27:31.680 --> 00:27:33.600
We're contributing to the darkness, are we not?

398
00:27:36.480 --> 00:27:44.520
And he said another response to the situation of the world

399
00:27:44.520 --> 00:27:47.440
with regard to being the light and darkness,

400
00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:49.640
and there were some other really good points

401
00:27:49.640 --> 00:27:58.840
he laid out there, was not on my watch, not on my watch.

402
00:27:58.840 --> 00:28:00.720
Now, can you solve all the problems

403
00:28:00.720 --> 00:28:04.000
as an individual, as an individual Christian man

404
00:28:04.000 --> 00:28:04.520
in the world?

405
00:28:04.520 --> 00:28:05.840
No, you cannot.

406
00:28:05.840 --> 00:28:08.920
But you can do what you can do.

407
00:28:08.920 --> 00:28:12.480
You can bring light to the darkness where you're at,

408
00:28:12.480 --> 00:28:16.320
however small or great your light is.

409
00:28:16.320 --> 00:28:19.520
And I thought it was interesting because he then

410
00:28:19.520 --> 00:28:25.640
talked about righteousness on the tail end of that.

411
00:28:25.640 --> 00:28:27.480
He said, you know, he says, I think

412
00:28:27.480 --> 00:28:31.800
the better response of Christians and Christian people

413
00:28:31.800 --> 00:28:36.080
in the world to the events and the situation

414
00:28:36.080 --> 00:28:39.520
and condition of our world is to be

415
00:28:39.520 --> 00:28:42.800
taking a level of responsibility,

416
00:28:42.800 --> 00:28:46.000
taking into yourself and saying, you know what?

417
00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:48.240
Not on my watch.

418
00:28:48.280 --> 00:28:52.840
If I can find a wife and raise a family and do the right thing

419
00:28:52.840 --> 00:28:55.880
and be there for my wife and be a champion for my wife

420
00:28:55.880 --> 00:29:00.200
and my children and be a strong covering and protection

421
00:29:00.200 --> 00:29:05.400
for them and be the man of God for them, not to them,

422
00:29:05.400 --> 00:29:09.400
but for them, laying my life down for them

423
00:29:09.400 --> 00:29:12.120
as Jesus laid his life down for.

424
00:29:12.120 --> 00:29:13.680
So there's a beautiful.

425
00:29:13.680 --> 00:29:19.040
So yeah, when you look at a visual like this

426
00:29:19.040 --> 00:29:22.440
and then you layer on a bunch of past atrocities and abuse

427
00:29:22.440 --> 00:29:28.520
and trauma with it that many people have very similar,

428
00:29:28.520 --> 00:29:32.680
maybe varying details, but understand like, yeah,

429
00:29:32.680 --> 00:29:39.040
I get it, yeah, that could be very destructive.

430
00:29:39.080 --> 00:29:45.360
But I think the truth is very much there around that.

431
00:29:45.360 --> 00:29:50.360
And the truth being that there's a level of responsibility

432
00:29:50.360 --> 00:29:54.000
that I think especially men can come into

433
00:29:54.000 --> 00:29:56.200
and should come into.

434
00:29:56.200 --> 00:29:58.040
Jackie talks about all the time that marriage

435
00:29:58.040 --> 00:29:59.880
is God's maturity plan.

436
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:05.040
a level of stepping up into a maturity of like, Oh man, I've

437
00:30:05.040 --> 00:30:10.140
got a responsibility here. I have something that needs my

438
00:30:10.140 --> 00:30:14.720
attention that needs me. Not a put on, like as in, Hey, you

439
00:30:14.720 --> 00:30:17.540
should do this, you should, you should be better, like not as a

440
00:30:17.540 --> 00:30:23.320
put down, but as an invitation to level up, an invitation to be

441
00:30:23.320 --> 00:30:28.640
all you can be an invitation for you to like, can I go deeper?

442
00:30:29.200 --> 00:30:33.800
Can I hear God's voice clear? Can I seek him further in a

443
00:30:33.800 --> 00:30:38.560
sense that like, wow, I never knew I could do this. It's like

444
00:30:38.560 --> 00:30:43.080
going into the gym, and you know, doing the work, and then

445
00:30:43.080 --> 00:30:47.520
finally having the breakthrough of a weight class or a certain

446
00:30:47.560 --> 00:30:49.800
level of weight that you've never been able to do before.

447
00:30:50.720 --> 00:30:54.800
Like having it's like doing the homework long enough for you to

448
00:30:54.800 --> 00:31:00.760
be able to do whatever task that you never were able to do.

449
00:31:01.080 --> 00:31:03.720
And now you broke through because now you understand it.

450
00:31:03.960 --> 00:31:07.800
Now you get it. You're like, Oh, I can do this. I can do this.

451
00:31:07.800 --> 00:31:11.240
Now. We've all had those types of breakthroughs in our life.

452
00:31:12.240 --> 00:31:15.080
They could be even the smallest things. I mean, you learn to

453
00:31:15.080 --> 00:31:18.280
walk, you learn to talk, you learn to be a human being, some

454
00:31:18.280 --> 00:31:20.960
of those are the greatest breakthroughs you'll ever have

455
00:31:20.960 --> 00:31:25.040
in your life. So you understand as a human being living in this

456
00:31:25.040 --> 00:31:30.560
world, the invitation to level up. And so I think that's where

457
00:31:30.560 --> 00:31:33.440
we're at with a lot of like men in our world today. And I've

458
00:31:33.440 --> 00:31:36.320
said this before, like we're living in a day and age guys,

459
00:31:36.880 --> 00:31:40.560
where like, unfortunately, good isn't good enough. And I don't

460
00:31:40.560 --> 00:31:43.000
again, I don't say that legalistically or like

461
00:31:43.080 --> 00:31:47.600
condemningly. I say it like as in, I'm challenged. I've been

462
00:31:47.600 --> 00:31:53.520
challenged in my life to actually be the man and the

463
00:31:53.520 --> 00:31:59.680
husband that I say that I am. Rather than just always trying

464
00:31:59.680 --> 00:32:04.760
to like, try to be it or try to like, Oh, yeah, no, I should do

465
00:32:04.760 --> 00:32:07.960
this. And I should do that. I should be better, whatever.

466
00:32:08.400 --> 00:32:11.000
Instead of trying to just be better, how long does it take to

467
00:32:11.000 --> 00:32:18.760
get better? You know, my focus is, is being that on its own

468
00:32:18.760 --> 00:32:21.720
face, like if you were, it's kind of like the old adage, is

469
00:32:21.720 --> 00:32:25.840
there enough? Is there enough information? Is there enough

470
00:32:26.160 --> 00:32:33.640
details enough evidence in your life? That says who you are? That

471
00:32:33.640 --> 00:32:37.120
says you're a believer in Christ that says that you're a man of

472
00:32:37.120 --> 00:32:40.520
God says that you're I don't know, again, those are just so

473
00:32:41.040 --> 00:32:44.440
difficult phrases, because they're so riddled with all the

474
00:32:44.440 --> 00:32:48.320
religiosity and fervor, right? But you know what I mean? Is

475
00:32:48.320 --> 00:32:52.920
there enough evidence to reveal the fact that you have that you

476
00:32:52.920 --> 00:33:00.240
have the substance? Right? And I have been I've been accepting

477
00:33:00.240 --> 00:33:07.320
this invitation to this. This is one last thing on

478
00:33:07.320 --> 00:33:12.120
righteousness. Dano said, he said, there's two kinds of

479
00:33:12.120 --> 00:33:15.680
righteousness, there's imputed righteousness, and there's

480
00:33:15.680 --> 00:33:21.120
imparted righteousness. The imputed righteousness is the

481
00:33:21.120 --> 00:33:25.720
righteousness you receive upon salvation. You could do nothing

482
00:33:25.720 --> 00:33:30.520
to get it. The price has been paid, the work has been

483
00:33:30.520 --> 00:33:33.880
finished, the blood has been shed to pay the price that you

484
00:33:33.880 --> 00:33:37.680
could never pay. So the righteousness that was imputed

485
00:33:37.680 --> 00:33:43.280
to you at the cross, is basically debts that were paid

486
00:33:43.280 --> 00:33:46.440
that you owe that were paid from somebody else's account, not

487
00:33:46.440 --> 00:33:50.600
your own, and not your own doing. So it's not anything that

488
00:33:50.600 --> 00:33:54.760
you could have earned or made or anything, right? So we get that

489
00:33:54.760 --> 00:34:00.720
and in terms of salvation. Imparted righteousness is the

490
00:34:00.720 --> 00:34:05.640
righteousness that God puts inside of you to do good works,

491
00:34:06.400 --> 00:34:10.800
to do the things that you can do. It's the next level. It's

492
00:34:10.800 --> 00:34:15.920
like, I've been saved, and I'm good to go. And I could just

493
00:34:15.920 --> 00:34:20.360
say, I'm good. I don't have to do anything. But there's

494
00:34:20.360 --> 00:34:23.840
something on the inside of you that God's placed. There's a

495
00:34:23.840 --> 00:34:26.400
mission, there's a call, there's a, and then again, I

496
00:34:26.400 --> 00:34:29.080
don't mean in a religious preaching sort of like ministry

497
00:34:29.080 --> 00:34:32.080
context. I just mean, there's something that you are supposed

498
00:34:32.080 --> 00:34:36.960
to bring to the world. What is that? You can think about

499
00:34:36.960 --> 00:34:41.120
career, and you can think about accomplishment, you could think

500
00:34:41.120 --> 00:34:44.120
about success, that kind of thing. But I think the things

501
00:34:44.120 --> 00:34:50.320
that really hold water are the things of like, fruits of the

502
00:34:50.320 --> 00:34:59.360
spirit, relational legacy things. Being a good man, first

503
00:34:59.360 --> 00:34:59.880
and foremost.

504
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:02.920
in your community, in your surroundings,

505
00:35:02.920 --> 00:35:04.800
in your sphere of influence.

506
00:35:04.800 --> 00:35:06.960
And then when you have a situation

507
00:35:06.960 --> 00:35:08.440
where you're in relationship

508
00:35:08.440 --> 00:35:11.280
and you take the step into ultimate relationship,

509
00:35:11.280 --> 00:35:14.560
being the best husband, being the best sports system,

510
00:35:14.560 --> 00:35:17.400
being the best prayer warrior for your family,

511
00:35:17.400 --> 00:35:21.000
being the best champion for your wife and your kids,

512
00:35:21.000 --> 00:35:23.880
raising your kids with the idea of legacy

513
00:35:23.880 --> 00:35:28.880
and passing on generational wealth and spiritual wealth

514
00:35:30.120 --> 00:35:31.280
financial wealth,

515
00:35:33.600 --> 00:35:36.160
intelligent heritage,

516
00:35:36.160 --> 00:35:39.560
passing off something that information

517
00:35:39.560 --> 00:35:42.320
that's necessary for the next generation to live with.

518
00:35:44.120 --> 00:35:45.920
You all hear what I'm saying today?

519
00:35:47.760 --> 00:35:50.080
I wanna get some responses to that.

520
00:35:50.080 --> 00:35:54.680
And I want you to feel lifted up and encouraged

521
00:35:55.640 --> 00:36:00.640
by this because I feel this is where the call is

522
00:36:03.160 --> 00:36:04.240
for men today.

523
00:36:05.360 --> 00:36:08.000
And maybe God's already been dealing with you

524
00:36:09.080 --> 00:36:12.680
about accepting that level of responsibility.

525
00:36:12.680 --> 00:36:14.440
I feel like there's definitely a measure of that

526
00:36:14.440 --> 00:36:16.680
because you're showing up to like this,

527
00:36:16.680 --> 00:36:17.520
you're showing up,

528
00:36:17.520 --> 00:36:19.880
like you wouldn't be showing up to a call like this

529
00:36:19.880 --> 00:36:23.600
if you weren't leveling up to some degree.

530
00:36:24.600 --> 00:36:27.760
So my question to you is like, what's the next step?

531
00:36:31.200 --> 00:36:32.480
What's next?

532
00:36:33.600 --> 00:36:36.080
Like, what's like, I'm gonna continue in this

533
00:36:36.080 --> 00:36:39.040
or what's something new that I'm going to like

534
00:36:39.040 --> 00:36:41.120
challenge myself with?

535
00:36:41.120 --> 00:36:43.880
Doesn't have to be huge, but it has to be,

536
00:36:43.880 --> 00:36:47.720
it could be a step in the right direction.

537
00:36:48.440 --> 00:36:51.440
God's been really challenging me

538
00:36:51.440 --> 00:36:53.720
with like unconditional surrender,

539
00:36:53.720 --> 00:36:55.560
whatever that looks like.

540
00:36:55.560 --> 00:36:57.400
Right now it feels like, I don't know,

541
00:36:57.400 --> 00:36:58.800
there's just a lot of like,

542
00:36:59.800 --> 00:37:01.400
there's a lot of emotion in saying that,

543
00:37:01.400 --> 00:37:03.720
but like, I just got back from dinner

544
00:37:03.720 --> 00:37:05.960
with a guy from church.

545
00:37:05.960 --> 00:37:10.000
He's probably in his early,

546
00:37:10.000 --> 00:37:12.720
maybe early forties at most.

547
00:37:13.320 --> 00:37:15.920
Maybe early forties at most.

548
00:37:15.920 --> 00:37:19.960
And he, five years ago,

549
00:37:19.960 --> 00:37:23.240
he was strung out in Texas

550
00:37:23.240 --> 00:37:26.040
and he felt his breath leaving.

551
00:37:26.040 --> 00:37:27.640
And he said, no.

552
00:37:27.640 --> 00:37:30.880
And I mean, he got there because of rebellion against God,

553
00:37:30.880 --> 00:37:34.280
but in five years, God completely turned his life around.

554
00:37:34.280 --> 00:37:37.480
And I'm looking at my life and I'm like, God, like,

555
00:37:40.040 --> 00:37:41.720
what's holding me back?

556
00:37:41.720 --> 00:37:45.840
And it's like unconditional surrender.

557
00:37:45.840 --> 00:37:48.720
I mean, he died there, he was dead.

558
00:37:48.720 --> 00:37:51.080
And like God gave him his life back.

559
00:37:51.080 --> 00:37:52.360
And one thing led to another

560
00:37:52.360 --> 00:37:54.960
and hearing God's voice in crazy ways.

561
00:37:56.240 --> 00:37:58.960
And it's like, what's the difference between me

562
00:37:58.960 --> 00:38:01.040
who grew up in church and him?

563
00:38:01.040 --> 00:38:02.000
He's died.

564
00:38:03.160 --> 00:38:06.160
And now his life is Christ.

565
00:38:06.160 --> 00:38:08.840
And some of that have had a easier life

566
00:38:08.840 --> 00:38:11.680
or haven't made as many mistakes.

567
00:38:12.640 --> 00:38:14.760
I had a hard time getting to that point,

568
00:38:14.760 --> 00:38:17.280
but it was very inspiring.

569
00:38:17.280 --> 00:38:21.000
So die to self is the best way to be in a position

570
00:38:21.000 --> 00:38:22.960
to lead a family and to be in a position

571
00:38:22.960 --> 00:38:24.680
to hear God in particular.

572
00:38:24.680 --> 00:38:27.520
Absolutely, that's what we all said, Chris.

573
00:38:27.520 --> 00:38:28.680
Thank you for sharing that.

574
00:38:28.680 --> 00:38:31.680
Because the question that you said

575
00:38:31.680 --> 00:38:33.720
is probably a good wrap up question

576
00:38:35.120 --> 00:38:36.600
as a round table right now,

577
00:38:36.600 --> 00:38:38.280
which is like, what's holding you back?

578
00:38:38.280 --> 00:38:39.120
I love that.

579
00:38:39.120 --> 00:38:39.960
Thank you for that.

580
00:38:40.160 --> 00:38:42.160
Let's focus on that question.

581
00:38:42.160 --> 00:38:44.240
If we could all sort of like give one answer

582
00:38:44.240 --> 00:38:46.360
to like what's holding you back right now.

583
00:38:47.280 --> 00:38:50.880
And the second thing you said

584
00:38:50.880 --> 00:38:53.760
with regard to right at the end there,

585
00:38:53.760 --> 00:38:55.440
that'll come back to me in a second.

586
00:38:55.440 --> 00:38:56.280
It was really good.

587
00:38:56.280 --> 00:38:57.600
Thank you for sharing that.

588
00:38:57.600 --> 00:39:00.560
Because I felt like that was really good.

589
00:39:01.520 --> 00:39:02.680
So let's do that question, guys.

590
00:39:02.680 --> 00:39:03.520
What's holding you back?

591
00:39:03.520 --> 00:39:06.800
What's one thing that you might feel is holding you back?

592
00:39:07.680 --> 00:39:09.400
Could be negative talk.

593
00:39:09.400 --> 00:39:13.040
And specifically, it's like a specific negative talk.

594
00:39:13.040 --> 00:39:15.080
It could be a habit.

595
00:39:15.080 --> 00:39:19.400
It could be, dare I say, a situation.

596
00:39:19.400 --> 00:39:21.320
Situations can change.

597
00:39:21.320 --> 00:39:23.840
We expect situations to get better and change.

598
00:39:23.840 --> 00:39:25.120
So I understand when you say,

599
00:39:25.120 --> 00:39:26.440
well, I'm in a situation right now.

600
00:39:26.440 --> 00:39:27.880
Okay, I get that.

601
00:39:27.880 --> 00:39:30.120
But that's not what's holding you back.

602
00:39:30.120 --> 00:39:34.880
Circumstances, you can always come up with circumstances

603
00:39:34.880 --> 00:39:36.320
that hold you back.

604
00:39:36.800 --> 00:39:39.040
But that's not what's holding you back.

605
00:39:39.040 --> 00:39:41.640
What's holding you back is something on the inside.

606
00:39:44.360 --> 00:39:46.160
So let me challenge you tonight.

607
00:39:46.160 --> 00:39:47.360
What's holding you back?

608
00:39:56.960 --> 00:39:59.320
It's the screen share, man.

609
00:39:59.320 --> 00:40:00.720
It's the screen share.

610
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:02.500
If you could close it for Rob's sake.

611
00:40:02.500 --> 00:40:03.840
Oh, let me, let me take that off.

612
00:40:03.840 --> 00:40:04.680
Sorry, bro.

613
00:40:04.680 --> 00:40:05.920
Sorry, guys.

614
00:40:05.920 --> 00:40:07.760
Josh, you are too kind.

615
00:40:07.760 --> 00:40:09.800
I'm just shoving that in your face with that screen.

616
00:40:09.800 --> 00:40:11.800
I'm so sorry.

617
00:40:11.800 --> 00:40:13.320
I repent to you.

618
00:40:13.320 --> 00:40:14.540
I wanted to see faces.

619
00:40:14.540 --> 00:40:15.380
That's okay.

620
00:40:15.380 --> 00:40:16.960
Thanks for jumping in, Josh.

621
00:40:16.960 --> 00:40:17.800
Sorry about that.

622
00:40:17.800 --> 00:40:18.620
Oh my gosh.

623
00:40:18.620 --> 00:40:19.460
Josh is my spokesperson.

624
00:40:19.460 --> 00:40:20.960
Much better with faces.

625
00:40:20.960 --> 00:40:25.520
Rob's gonna have dreams of umbrellas tonight in this space.

626
00:40:25.520 --> 00:40:29.480
I think what's holding me back is unbelief.

627
00:40:29.480 --> 00:40:30.320
Okay.

628
00:40:33.920 --> 00:40:36.580
Unbelief in yourself, unbelief in just.

629
00:40:37.620 --> 00:40:39.080
Unbelief in God.

630
00:40:39.080 --> 00:40:40.820
Thinking he has the best for me.

631
00:40:40.820 --> 00:40:43.180
I came to, I want my life to be great,

632
00:40:43.180 --> 00:40:44.420
and I came to him thinking,

633
00:40:44.420 --> 00:40:46.960
all right, God, you're gonna make my life great, are you?

634
00:40:46.960 --> 00:40:49.540
Well, let's see.

635
00:40:49.540 --> 00:40:51.000
Why didn't you make it great?

636
00:40:51.960 --> 00:40:52.800
Ah.

637
00:40:54.000 --> 00:40:55.760
Supernatural Saturday, guys.

638
00:40:56.720 --> 00:41:00.240
I don't know if you were there or you heard the replay.

639
00:41:00.240 --> 00:41:04.680
That was a profound message.

640
00:41:04.680 --> 00:41:08.440
Jackie literally said, Jesus is not coming to rescue you.

641
00:41:11.320 --> 00:41:12.160
How about that?

642
00:41:13.400 --> 00:41:16.100
Jesus is not coming to rescue you.

643
00:41:17.860 --> 00:41:20.360
And you might ask, well, why?

644
00:41:20.360 --> 00:41:22.240
Why wouldn't he come rescue me?

645
00:41:22.240 --> 00:41:25.760
Because he already did the work.

646
00:41:28.280 --> 00:41:32.080
The work is actually finished on Jesus' part.

647
00:41:35.480 --> 00:41:37.680
If there's anything that feels like

648
00:41:37.680 --> 00:41:39.840
Jesus is coming to the rescue,

649
00:41:39.840 --> 00:41:42.560
what it actually is is it's a manifestation

650
00:41:42.560 --> 00:41:45.380
of something that you have now locked onto in belief,

651
00:41:45.380 --> 00:41:48.520
in faith, that has manifested in your life.

652
00:41:49.520 --> 00:41:52.800
Because of your actions, your faith,

653
00:41:52.800 --> 00:41:55.480
or someone else's faith and action,

654
00:41:55.480 --> 00:41:57.760
circumstantially, that has come to be.

655
00:42:08.560 --> 00:42:09.920
So what's holding you back?

656
00:42:13.960 --> 00:42:16.560
Let's get at least one little answer from everyone.

657
00:42:17.560 --> 00:42:18.960
Personal wounds.

658
00:42:20.240 --> 00:42:22.160
Personal wounds?

659
00:42:22.160 --> 00:42:25.400
Yeah, trauma I've been through in the military.

660
00:42:25.400 --> 00:42:26.800
Military, okay.

661
00:42:26.800 --> 00:42:28.400
Relationship with my dad.

662
00:42:30.720 --> 00:42:33.560
Guy that basically has robbed me of joy in my life.

663
00:42:38.560 --> 00:42:41.040
Some of the things that used to hold me back were alcoholism

664
00:42:41.040 --> 00:42:44.100
and this October will be three years sober.

665
00:42:45.060 --> 00:42:45.900
Wow.

666
00:42:46.560 --> 00:42:47.800
That's awesome.

667
00:42:49.000 --> 00:42:54.000
And just kind of like what you were referencing, maturity.

668
00:42:55.920 --> 00:42:58.160
You know, I'm sort of a big kid.

669
00:42:58.160 --> 00:43:03.160
Makes that probably a tough cookie for dating some people.

670
00:43:09.320 --> 00:43:12.040
And like even a gal I'm dating now

671
00:43:12.040 --> 00:43:15.840
who completely accepts me for being a big kid,

672
00:43:15.840 --> 00:43:18.960
is still like, well, you know, let's,

673
00:43:18.960 --> 00:43:20.120
I think I should learn,

674
00:43:20.120 --> 00:43:21.680
I think I should teach you how to be mean

675
00:43:21.680 --> 00:43:23.800
because you know, you don't understand

676
00:43:23.800 --> 00:43:25.040
some boundaries with things

677
00:43:25.040 --> 00:43:27.680
and I think you need, you'd be better off with boundaries.

678
00:43:27.680 --> 00:43:31.880
And I understand how to be mean, I just don't want to.

679
00:43:32.720 --> 00:43:35.360
You know, I think it would just change me as a person.

680
00:43:37.720 --> 00:43:39.800
Did you say how to be mean?

681
00:43:39.800 --> 00:43:42.600
Yeah, mean, M-E-A-N.

682
00:43:42.600 --> 00:43:43.440
Okay.

683
00:43:44.480 --> 00:43:45.320
I see.

684
00:43:46.800 --> 00:43:48.760
Well, thank you for sharing.

685
00:43:48.760 --> 00:43:53.760
So yeah, trauma, level, just responsibility in general,

686
00:43:53.840 --> 00:43:55.800
being a big kid, like loving up,

687
00:43:55.800 --> 00:43:59.840
like I can't do this anymore, hold you back.

688
00:43:59.840 --> 00:44:00.680
Who else?

689
00:44:11.360 --> 00:44:14.200
This ought to be, this is a hard one.

690
00:44:16.040 --> 00:44:21.000
I think this is another question

691
00:44:21.000 --> 00:44:22.840
that I feel like I have a little bit of difficulty

692
00:44:22.840 --> 00:44:23.880
with the framing.

693
00:44:23.880 --> 00:44:26.440
Say, I feel like in one sense, maybe we do,

694
00:44:26.440 --> 00:44:28.200
in another sense,

695
00:44:28.200 --> 00:44:31.360
I feel like I've been making such good forward progress.

696
00:44:31.360 --> 00:44:35.560
And I think that the,

697
00:44:35.560 --> 00:44:40.560
I think something that I let go of about five weeks ago

698
00:44:41.080 --> 00:44:44.080
is kind of a content addiction.

699
00:44:44.080 --> 00:44:46.200
And so I think

700
00:44:49.640 --> 00:44:54.640
the question of what that has been protecting me from

701
00:44:55.040 --> 00:44:57.240
or anesthetizing me from, rather,

702
00:44:57.240 --> 00:44:59.200
is probably a better way to say it.

703
00:44:59.200 --> 00:45:00.200
I think it's still.

704
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.520
kind of unfolding. And so I think that right now I'm in the

705
00:45:05.520 --> 00:45:08.600
middle of discovery. And I think prioritization, for sure, is

706
00:45:08.600 --> 00:45:12.040
something that I have not always done well throughout my life,

707
00:45:12.200 --> 00:45:14.960
and figuring out what are the important things to focus on?

708
00:45:14.960 --> 00:45:18.760
And what are the less important things? I think it's a

709
00:45:18.760 --> 00:45:21.600
significant growth area in my life that I'm really grateful to

710
00:45:21.600 --> 00:45:23.160
be also making good progress in.

711
00:45:23.840 --> 00:45:29.120
That's good. That's good. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm with you on that.

712
00:45:29.320 --> 00:45:33.440
Because there's been some things I've been striding and striving

713
00:45:33.440 --> 00:45:37.440
for that I've been doing better at and doing well at. And then

714
00:45:37.440 --> 00:45:40.200
yet this morning, like I said, in my counseling session, I

715
00:45:40.200 --> 00:45:43.720
still because he asked me, you know, what's negative talks,

716
00:45:43.760 --> 00:45:48.080
like, I feel like there's that never enough sort of language

717
00:45:48.120 --> 00:45:51.960
that comes in, you know, so I get it. Yeah, I understand what

718
00:45:51.960 --> 00:45:56.240
you're saying there. Thank you for sharing that. Who else is?

719
00:45:57.240 --> 00:45:59.760
So we'll change the question a little bit. Thanks, Thomas,

720
00:45:59.800 --> 00:46:03.120
we're like, what is holding you back? Or what has been holding

721
00:46:03.120 --> 00:46:05.800
you back? And you're working on right now, and you're seeing

722
00:46:05.800 --> 00:46:09.880
some success in. So let's just talk about that. Because it

723
00:46:09.880 --> 00:46:12.320
might, you never know, guys, it might help somebody else.

724
00:46:12.560 --> 00:46:17.600
Somebody else may be thinking, oh, yeah. That is holding me

725
00:46:17.600 --> 00:46:21.360
back. And so and so is already working on it. So, you know,

726
00:46:21.360 --> 00:46:22.960
like, that can be encouraging.

727
00:46:23.480 --> 00:46:26.800
I'll jump in, David, you've, you've now asked three questions,

728
00:46:26.800 --> 00:46:30.960
by the way, just a quick question counting on my head.

729
00:46:31.480 --> 00:46:33.480
I'm just trying to help. I'm just trying to

730
00:46:34.840 --> 00:46:39.080
answer the first one, which is what? What I'm going to get the

731
00:46:39.080 --> 00:46:42.080
answer to for real quick. I'll do I'll make it brief. What

732
00:46:42.080 --> 00:46:44.680
steps are you doing to move forward some version of moving

733
00:46:44.680 --> 00:46:49.800
forward? So, um, and this might seem simple to you all, but I

734
00:46:50.120 --> 00:46:52.400
sat down and did some concentrated work on my core

735
00:46:52.400 --> 00:46:56.840
values, so that as I enter into the dating world, I have a real

736
00:46:56.840 --> 00:47:01.360
strong center. And if you asked me, like off the cuff, I'd say,

737
00:47:01.360 --> 00:47:05.440
oh, it's, you know, x, y, and z. And, but to actually go through

738
00:47:05.440 --> 00:47:10.320
the work of, of narrowing, and then really asking yourself,

739
00:47:11.120 --> 00:47:14.600
asking myself, when does that show up? Well, and when is when

740
00:47:14.600 --> 00:47:18.120
do I live outside of my core values? It was just a fun,

741
00:47:18.200 --> 00:47:21.960
fun, important exercise for me that I spent some time on over

742
00:47:21.960 --> 00:47:26.640
the holiday. So I'm also over the holiday, what's holding me

743
00:47:26.640 --> 00:47:31.120
back, I started thinking about creating a dating profile. And

744
00:47:31.120 --> 00:47:34.800
this whole idea of kind of moving the next level with

745
00:47:34.800 --> 00:47:39.440
putting myself out there. And I just became paralyzed. Like,

746
00:47:39.800 --> 00:47:45.680
yeah, paralyzed, thinking about the photos and reading about the

747
00:47:45.680 --> 00:47:50.720
advice and the creativity that is demanded in a profile. And I,

748
00:47:51.000 --> 00:47:54.240
two things showed up. One is this idea of perfectionism for

749
00:47:54.240 --> 00:47:57.880
me, like the parallel parallelization, really tied to

750
00:47:57.880 --> 00:48:02.840
perfectionism. But perfectionism is really just a mask to to

751
00:48:02.840 --> 00:48:09.000
protect me from what's really just a fear. Fear being liked,

752
00:48:09.000 --> 00:48:13.400
being loved, fear of rejection. And so yeah, so that's what's

753
00:48:13.400 --> 00:48:16.720
holding me back of, I would just say, in this particular

754
00:48:16.720 --> 00:48:20.840
part of my life of moving forward in the, in the dating

755
00:48:20.840 --> 00:48:26.400
world. It's still a deep fear, I still seek safety, though.

756
00:48:27.120 --> 00:48:36.040
Okay. Good. Thank you. Thank you for sharing that. I realized

757
00:48:36.040 --> 00:48:43.280
that some of my feelings today are based in a scared or

758
00:48:43.280 --> 00:48:51.240
fearful way. And I realized that in an exercise I did earlier

759
00:48:51.240 --> 00:48:55.880
today that I might even do this next week on our call. But

760
00:48:56.720 --> 00:49:03.000
which is really odd because I hate fear. Like fear. I mean, I

761
00:49:03.000 --> 00:49:10.160
I'm like, whenever somebody is in a fear response, because I

762
00:49:10.160 --> 00:49:13.920
just think it's so stupid. I'm not saying they're stupid. I'm

763
00:49:13.920 --> 00:49:17.040
not trying to say they're stupid. I just I'm like, it's

764
00:49:17.040 --> 00:49:21.040
so silly. It's like you're scared of something that really

765
00:49:21.040 --> 00:49:23.560
isn't there. You know, like, you know, you know, have you ever

766
00:49:23.560 --> 00:49:27.920
seen somebody just manifest in fear? You know, like, oh, this

767
00:49:28.520 --> 00:49:33.760
and I just like, it just makes me so mad. And so I've just

768
00:49:33.760 --> 00:49:38.960
always thought of myself as not a very fearful person. Like, I

769
00:49:38.960 --> 00:49:41.840
don't like walk around like, Oh, my gosh, like things are gonna

770
00:49:41.840 --> 00:49:44.720
happen. And just like, you know, I'm like, I'm just not like

771
00:49:44.720 --> 00:49:48.560
that. I just like, and then I've learned, I think, in a

772
00:49:48.560 --> 00:49:51.720
spiritual way to sort of even like confront fear. Like, I

773
00:49:51.720 --> 00:49:57.080
just, I like, I recognize fear quickly. And I like to get in

774
00:49:57.080 --> 00:49:59.560
its face. And I like I said, Get out, you know, get out of

775
00:49:59.560 --> 00:49:59.920
here.

776
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.800
You take authority over it, take spiritual authority over it,

777
00:50:02.800 --> 00:50:04.960
that type of thing.

778
00:50:04.960 --> 00:50:08.960
But I realized today that some of my feelings

779
00:50:08.960 --> 00:50:14.960
are rooted in a certain level of fear and scaredness.

780
00:50:14.960 --> 00:50:18.320
So I just had this revelation today

781
00:50:18.320 --> 00:50:22.280
and saw this irony of this fear thing.

782
00:50:22.280 --> 00:50:27.960
Now I'm going to go after that because I just don't like fear.

783
00:50:27.960 --> 00:50:29.500
I don't like to be.

784
00:50:29.500 --> 00:50:30.620
I don't enjoy being scared.

785
00:50:30.620 --> 00:50:32.140
Some people like doing that.

786
00:50:32.140 --> 00:50:36.340
I do not enjoy that at all.

787
00:50:36.340 --> 00:50:39.380
Anyway, so I'm just confessing some of the stuff

788
00:50:39.380 --> 00:50:43.760
that I'm working through and working with right now.

789
00:50:43.760 --> 00:50:44.300
Anybody else?

790
00:50:44.300 --> 00:50:48.140
Who else has got something just either you're just

791
00:50:48.140 --> 00:50:50.900
realizing right now, oh, man, this is in my way,

792
00:50:50.900 --> 00:50:53.660
or you already know it?

793
00:50:53.660 --> 00:50:54.160
What else?

794
00:50:54.160 --> 00:50:55.380
Who else?

795
00:50:55.380 --> 00:50:57.380
I got one, unless I want someone else to.

796
00:51:04.060 --> 00:51:06.460
Hello, Hunter, are you there?

797
00:51:06.460 --> 00:51:07.660
Yes.

798
00:51:07.660 --> 00:51:09.740
What is yours?

799
00:51:09.740 --> 00:51:13.140
Well, see, I've been struggling for 13 and 1

800
00:51:13.140 --> 00:51:17.740
1⁄2 years with self-gratification or lust

801
00:51:17.740 --> 00:51:19.740
and pornography.

802
00:51:19.740 --> 00:51:23.820
And I'm actually doing well, more than I ever

803
00:51:23.820 --> 00:51:25.700
did these couple of years.

804
00:51:25.700 --> 00:51:29.660
My biggest record of going without it was nine days.

805
00:51:29.660 --> 00:51:32.340
Now it's for going abroad or a couple of days

806
00:51:32.340 --> 00:51:35.740
only when I'm going to be at somebody's home

807
00:51:35.740 --> 00:51:38.780
or be traveling, not in my bedroom,

808
00:51:38.780 --> 00:51:40.500
going to sleep in my soft bed sheets,

809
00:51:40.500 --> 00:51:43.220
but traveling abroad or being with where

810
00:51:43.220 --> 00:51:45.860
I'm going to be sleeping with next to somebody

811
00:51:45.860 --> 00:51:50.680
or other guys because I don't want anybody to know about it.

812
00:51:50.680 --> 00:51:52.500
And I just figured, you know, you

813
00:51:52.500 --> 00:51:55.180
should just say pray about it and not think about it

814
00:51:55.180 --> 00:52:00.620
and I worship her because that's going to lead you to that.

815
00:52:00.620 --> 00:52:03.180
What you need to do is just get on your knees and pray

816
00:52:03.180 --> 00:52:05.700
and not look and watch God work.

817
00:52:05.700 --> 00:52:06.900
And guess what?

818
00:52:06.900 --> 00:52:10.100
Ever since then, I can't believe Hunter got into me about it.

819
00:52:10.100 --> 00:52:12.980
My habit went from four times a week,

820
00:52:12.980 --> 00:52:15.340
plummeted once every 72 hours.

821
00:52:15.340 --> 00:52:17.140
And now last week, I just broke a record

822
00:52:17.140 --> 00:52:21.380
about just that once a week, once a week.

823
00:52:21.980 --> 00:52:24.260
And I'm going to try next week and go the entire week

824
00:52:24.260 --> 00:52:25.060
without it.

825
00:52:25.060 --> 00:52:26.380
And if I could go over a month, I

826
00:52:26.380 --> 00:52:29.020
might be done with Covenant Eyes.

827
00:52:29.020 --> 00:52:31.100
That's awesome.

828
00:52:31.100 --> 00:52:34.420
Breaking down the stats on it and everything.

829
00:52:34.420 --> 00:52:35.740
That's awesome.

830
00:52:35.740 --> 00:52:37.860
Please don't tell Jackie because otherwise she's

831
00:52:37.860 --> 00:52:39.740
going to tell all the other ladies and be like,

832
00:52:39.740 --> 00:52:41.660
ew, that's creepy.

833
00:52:41.660 --> 00:52:44.780
She doesn't pay attention to these calls too much now.

834
00:52:44.780 --> 00:52:45.940
All right.

835
00:52:45.940 --> 00:52:47.860
So it's just the first time in a couple,

836
00:52:47.860 --> 00:52:50.180
in a first time in 13 years struggle.

837
00:52:50.180 --> 00:52:51.220
I had to do it on my own.

838
00:52:51.220 --> 00:52:54.980
And the culture just didn't take it.

839
00:52:54.980 --> 00:52:58.140
Well, our culture either accepts it or doesn't know any better,

840
00:52:58.140 --> 00:53:00.740
won't talk about it, just doesn't know any better.

841
00:53:00.740 --> 00:53:02.020
So they go, what?

842
00:53:02.020 --> 00:53:03.660
And they're like, whatever.

843
00:53:03.660 --> 00:53:04.740
And they're just waiting on us.

844
00:53:04.740 --> 00:53:06.780
I'm not mad at the culture for accepting it.

845
00:53:06.780 --> 00:53:09.980
They're just waiting on us to do something about it.

846
00:53:09.980 --> 00:53:11.260
They can come on, come on, God.

847
00:53:11.260 --> 00:53:14.900
Give me the spouse so if I want sex, I could go to them.

848
00:53:14.900 --> 00:53:17.500
But I got to remember that's not true.

849
00:53:17.500 --> 00:53:19.220
And when I prayed for something,

850
00:53:19.220 --> 00:53:21.340
it wasn't really pouring out my heart to God.

851
00:53:21.340 --> 00:53:23.020
It was just me telling them what to do

852
00:53:23.020 --> 00:53:25.780
and what I need to make Mary the youngest

853
00:53:25.780 --> 00:53:28.060
so I can have the best because I want

854
00:53:28.060 --> 00:53:29.380
to live life to the fullest.

855
00:53:29.380 --> 00:53:31.740
But in reality, it's just my passion,

856
00:53:31.740 --> 00:53:33.780
like in the book of James.

857
00:53:33.780 --> 00:53:37.100
And I just felt bad about it.

858
00:53:37.100 --> 00:53:40.340
I figured I got wasted my life.

859
00:53:40.340 --> 00:53:42.140
Well, thank you for sharing that, Hunter.

860
00:53:42.140 --> 00:53:43.060
That's powerful.

861
00:53:43.060 --> 00:53:44.260
It's a breakthrough.

862
00:53:44.260 --> 00:53:47.300
And we're going to celebrate and rejoice with you.

863
00:53:47.300 --> 00:53:51.060
And some good stuff.

864
00:53:51.060 --> 00:53:52.420
There were some nuggets in there.

865
00:53:52.420 --> 00:53:56.860
I don't know if you guys caught some simple truth there.

866
00:53:56.860 --> 00:54:00.460
I won't go into it, but just some good stuff there.

867
00:54:00.460 --> 00:54:02.820
Anybody else?

868
00:54:02.820 --> 00:54:05.940
Anything that you want to like, hey, you know what?

869
00:54:05.940 --> 00:54:07.220
I'm going to put it out there.

870
00:54:07.220 --> 00:54:08.540
I'm going to do this.

871
00:54:08.540 --> 00:54:10.620
I'm going to work on this, whatever

872
00:54:10.620 --> 00:54:14.460
it is that's either it's holding you back or it's in your way

873
00:54:14.460 --> 00:54:15.860
or it's just like, you know what?

874
00:54:15.900 --> 00:54:21.540
I'm done with this level of thinking, whatever it is.

875
00:54:21.540 --> 00:54:24.180
Anybody else?

876
00:54:24.180 --> 00:54:25.660
I think I kind of get in my own way.

877
00:54:28.780 --> 00:54:32.540
You know, like set myself up for failure

878
00:54:32.540 --> 00:54:39.860
or tell myself I'm undeserving or haven't earned

879
00:54:39.860 --> 00:54:44.180
the capability to receive love from someone else or affection.

880
00:54:46.140 --> 00:54:47.300
Things like that nature.

881
00:54:51.220 --> 00:54:52.060
Get in your own way.

882
00:54:52.060 --> 00:54:58.220
Yeah, we all do that for sure in lots of different ways.

883
00:54:58.220 --> 00:55:01.340
But I mean, in the sense of I almost like.

884
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:03.360
set up the possibility for relationships

885
00:55:03.360 --> 00:55:05.640
to fall on purpose.

886
00:55:05.640 --> 00:55:09.280
Almost like, oh, well, she must be crazy

887
00:55:09.280 --> 00:55:11.000
if she likes me whatsoever.

888
00:55:12.000 --> 00:55:15.760
And so like, I'll manufacture some type of an argument

889
00:55:15.760 --> 00:55:18.520
or something to break up about.

890
00:55:18.520 --> 00:55:22.200
It's not like recent, it's just going through

891
00:55:22.200 --> 00:55:23.600
some of the hard work.

892
00:55:23.600 --> 00:55:28.600
You know, it's stuff that I've recognized I've done

893
00:55:29.600 --> 00:55:33.760
in the past and just kind of calling it out there now.

894
00:55:33.760 --> 00:55:36.120
So I don't know.

895
00:55:37.720 --> 00:55:39.800
I pray that I don't repeat that behavior.

896
00:55:40.800 --> 00:55:43.800
Even the lady I'm dating now,

897
00:55:45.320 --> 00:55:46.640
she doesn't want any more kids

898
00:55:46.640 --> 00:55:50.360
and she's aware I'm moving away next year to go to school.

899
00:55:50.360 --> 00:55:52.400
And so even though we're not like,

900
00:55:54.800 --> 00:55:56.840
it's not gonna lead toward a marriage.

901
00:55:56.880 --> 00:55:59.480
It just, I enjoy her company.

902
00:56:00.400 --> 00:56:02.880
You know, sending music to each other,

903
00:56:02.880 --> 00:56:04.240
being dorks together.

904
00:56:08.160 --> 00:56:10.920
It kind of is revitalizing like,

905
00:56:14.160 --> 00:56:17.360
I guess like path forward for me

906
00:56:17.360 --> 00:56:19.440
for how I should operate in the future.

907
00:56:19.440 --> 00:56:21.920
So not in fear, but out of joy.

908
00:56:22.920 --> 00:56:23.760
Okay.

909
00:56:24.960 --> 00:56:25.800
Thank you for sharing.

910
00:56:25.800 --> 00:56:27.400
Thank you for that.

911
00:56:27.400 --> 00:56:28.560
Getting it out there, guys.

912
00:56:28.560 --> 00:56:32.600
Just getting it out there, declaring it, speaking it out.

913
00:56:34.760 --> 00:56:35.600
So good.

914
00:56:35.600 --> 00:56:36.520
Anybody else?

915
00:56:40.600 --> 00:56:43.040
I got a testimony to start off.

916
00:56:44.400 --> 00:56:47.120
Just realized it was about three weeks ago on this call

917
00:56:47.120 --> 00:56:50.960
and you were doing the confession.

918
00:56:51.840 --> 00:56:53.240
And it was in the middle of

919
00:56:55.600 --> 00:56:59.120
some things that I confessed in my relationship.

920
00:56:59.120 --> 00:57:02.320
And I was talking to some other people, support system.

921
00:57:02.320 --> 00:57:04.080
And all of a sudden I just had like,

922
00:57:04.080 --> 00:57:05.560
it was just a light bulb

923
00:57:05.560 --> 00:57:09.120
of just seeing how I was holding back in my relationship.

924
00:57:09.120 --> 00:57:11.080
And the following day I spent all day

925
00:57:11.080 --> 00:57:13.040
with my girlfriend and her nephews

926
00:57:13.040 --> 00:57:15.640
and it just changed everything, changed a lot.

927
00:57:15.640 --> 00:57:18.520
I was like, I practically ran to her

928
00:57:19.040 --> 00:57:21.920
and I told her I loved her that day for the first time.

929
00:57:21.920 --> 00:57:25.520
And it was like a breaking free of a lot of

930
00:57:25.520 --> 00:57:27.600
some of the things guys are talking about.

931
00:57:27.600 --> 00:57:28.760
Like I am enough.

932
00:57:28.760 --> 00:57:30.360
I do deserve this woman.

933
00:57:31.360 --> 00:57:32.440
She deserves me.

934
00:57:32.440 --> 00:57:34.440
We deserve to be happy

935
00:57:34.440 --> 00:57:37.160
at least to give my all in the relationship.

936
00:57:37.160 --> 00:57:40.320
So that's a praise report.

937
00:57:40.320 --> 00:57:42.440
And the other side of it is

938
00:57:42.440 --> 00:57:44.880
I just wanna be consistent with that.

939
00:57:44.880 --> 00:57:46.480
I don't wanna falter.

940
00:57:46.480 --> 00:57:51.360
I just wanna experience some breakthrough.

941
00:57:51.360 --> 00:57:54.040
Like you were saying, I appreciate your words about fear

942
00:57:54.040 --> 00:57:56.320
cause that's been something that's allowed to grip me

943
00:57:56.320 --> 00:57:59.000
and it doesn't have any good fruit.

944
00:57:59.000 --> 00:58:02.920
And I just wanna continue to be consistent in that.

945
00:58:02.920 --> 00:58:03.760
That's good.

946
00:58:03.760 --> 00:58:05.000
That's good.

947
00:58:05.000 --> 00:58:05.840
That's good.

948
00:58:05.840 --> 00:58:06.680
Cause I do remember that Paul,

949
00:58:06.680 --> 00:58:09.000
you guys, you were a couple of weeks ago,

950
00:58:09.000 --> 00:58:10.600
several weeks ago, you were in that,

951
00:58:10.600 --> 00:58:12.280
you're like, I'm dating this girl,

952
00:58:12.280 --> 00:58:13.600
but I just don't know.

953
00:58:13.640 --> 00:58:17.880
And I just, I'm, you know, I have these reservations

954
00:58:17.880 --> 00:58:22.880
and it's ironic that it requires you to like go in,

955
00:58:26.720 --> 00:58:29.040
go deeper to get the breakthrough.

956
00:58:29.040 --> 00:58:32.400
I mean, we're kind of, we've heard those like stories

957
00:58:32.400 --> 00:58:34.880
all of our life, like, you know, go harder, deeper,

958
00:58:34.880 --> 00:58:37.200
like I said, but men relationship,

959
00:58:37.200 --> 00:58:38.680
that is something that's so true.

960
00:58:38.680 --> 00:58:42.240
It's just like, it's not time to walk away.

961
00:58:42.240 --> 00:58:45.800
It's time to go in deeper, you know,

962
00:58:45.800 --> 00:58:50.800
and be better, try harder, like go into yourself

963
00:58:51.600 --> 00:58:56.600
and not with your own strength, but with grace.

964
00:58:57.320 --> 00:59:00.040
And that's the thing right there

965
00:59:00.040 --> 00:59:03.160
that is gonna produce the most consistency.

966
00:59:03.160 --> 00:59:06.960
It's having grace for yourself

967
00:59:06.960 --> 00:59:11.800
and being led in peace and grace

968
00:59:11.800 --> 00:59:16.800
because you can like, we were buying a car years ago

969
00:59:20.320 --> 00:59:24.840
and all the circumstances surrounding buying this car

970
00:59:25.800 --> 00:59:30.320
went very easy and full of grace

971
00:59:30.320 --> 00:59:32.640
to the point where we noticed, we looked at each other

972
00:59:32.640 --> 00:59:33.480
and we were like,

973
00:59:33.480 --> 00:59:36.440
can you believe that we're getting this car?

974
00:59:36.440 --> 00:59:38.520
Now, circumstantially, it was just like, you know,

975
00:59:38.520 --> 00:59:40.480
it wasn't like it was the fabulous car.

976
00:59:40.480 --> 00:59:43.560
I was actually trying to get out of another car deal

977
00:59:43.560 --> 00:59:47.040
that I was upside down in, you know,

978
00:59:47.040 --> 00:59:48.480
so I didn't have any value left in the car.

979
00:59:48.480 --> 00:59:49.960
Matter of fact, I owed,

980
00:59:49.960 --> 00:59:51.800
and I just wanted to get out of that

981
00:59:51.800 --> 00:59:54.200
to get into this other car.

982
00:59:54.200 --> 00:59:56.200
And the process was so easy

983
00:59:56.200 --> 00:59:58.400
and we were able to accomplish

984
00:59:58.400 --> 01:00:00.240
what I wanted to do financially.

985
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:07.720
And again, like I said, it wasn't like the super radical car, it was just a Honda Accord.

986
01:00:07.720 --> 01:00:13.400
But the process was so full of grace and ease that we ended up calling, it was a white car,

987
01:00:13.400 --> 01:00:17.120
we ended up calling the name of the car, we called it Grace.

988
01:00:17.120 --> 01:00:26.400
Because God chose to use that situation to show us how we should go about making decisions

989
01:00:26.400 --> 01:00:28.220
and planning things out.

990
01:00:28.220 --> 01:00:34.100
So now in our business, that was years ago, now in our business, Jackie and I use that

991
01:00:34.100 --> 01:00:39.980
principle of grace to make sure it's like, hey, we've got something, we could do this,

992
01:00:39.980 --> 01:00:45.460
we have this idea, we want to create this thing or we want to create this trip or have

993
01:00:45.460 --> 01:00:51.900
this moment or go here to this thing and get another business principle or do stuff in

994
01:00:51.900 --> 01:00:53.700
business.

995
01:00:53.700 --> 01:01:00.260
And we are consistently following peace and also grace.

996
01:01:00.260 --> 01:01:02.300
We feel like there's not a there's not a grace to do this.

997
01:01:02.300 --> 01:01:06.420
And so we had we had a situation just recently, where we're like, we're trying to make something

998
01:01:06.420 --> 01:01:07.420
happen.

999
01:01:07.420 --> 01:01:08.420
It's good.

1000
01:01:08.420 --> 01:01:09.420
It's nothing wrong with it.

1001
01:01:09.420 --> 01:01:10.420
It's nothing bad.

1002
01:01:10.420 --> 01:01:11.420
It's an expansion of the thing.

1003
01:01:11.420 --> 01:01:12.420
Got to do this.

1004
01:01:12.420 --> 01:01:14.180
We're going to this new endeavor.

1005
01:01:14.180 --> 01:01:16.500
And we're trying to go after it.

1006
01:01:16.500 --> 01:01:18.260
And it's like, man, it's not working.

1007
01:01:18.260 --> 01:01:21.100
It's like, so what do you do?

1008
01:01:21.100 --> 01:01:25.340
You dig in harder and you make it work and you try to figure it out, you do all the things

1009
01:01:25.340 --> 01:01:27.340
you could do that.

1010
01:01:27.340 --> 01:01:31.660
Or you could go with grace and you could say, you know what, there's something on this is

1011
01:01:31.660 --> 01:01:33.500
not a grace to do this.

1012
01:01:33.500 --> 01:01:34.820
And so we're not going to do it.

1013
01:01:34.820 --> 01:01:35.820
So we bowed out.

1014
01:01:35.820 --> 01:01:41.540
We said, no, we pulled the funds, we pulled the resources, we pulled the all the stuff,

1015
01:01:41.540 --> 01:01:45.380
the information that went into it, we're not going to do it.

1016
01:01:45.380 --> 01:01:49.740
Because we're not going to force the situation to happen, we're just going to be led in grace.

1017
01:01:49.780 --> 01:01:53.300
And that's one of the best ways to be consistent.

1018
01:01:53.300 --> 01:01:59.980
Because it's not it's not whether you'll fail because you you probably will mess up.

1019
01:01:59.980 --> 01:02:00.980
You won't do it perfectly.

1020
01:02:00.980 --> 01:02:03.180
You know what I'm saying?

1021
01:02:03.180 --> 01:02:08.620
But if you follow grace and go with grace and go, you know what, I'm going to continue

1022
01:02:08.620 --> 01:02:09.620
showing up.

1023
01:02:09.620 --> 01:02:11.060
I'm going to continue pressing in.

1024
01:02:11.060 --> 01:02:12.140
I'm going to continue leaning in.

1025
01:02:12.140 --> 01:02:17.140
I'm going to continue to rely on the presence of the Lord.

1026
01:02:17.140 --> 01:02:22.500
I like to pray or I like to speak in tongues or I like to like, do what I do in order to

1027
01:02:22.500 --> 01:02:28.260
like, make that connection with the Lord, have a have a talk with God.

1028
01:02:28.260 --> 01:02:32.620
You know, that's what I do in order to lean into that.

1029
01:02:32.620 --> 01:02:33.620
Instead of ignoring.

1030
01:02:33.620 --> 01:02:39.580
I don't know how many of you've ever done that before where you're like, oh, I want

1031
01:02:39.580 --> 01:02:44.540
something and I'm not, you know, I'm like, I'm not consistent with it and so forth.

1032
01:02:44.540 --> 01:02:53.500
So I feel bad about myself or whatever, instead of leaning into the resource of heaven.

1033
01:02:53.500 --> 01:02:55.280
That has all the answers.

1034
01:02:55.280 --> 01:02:56.860
We do that all the time, right?

1035
01:02:56.860 --> 01:02:59.260
We just like, why do we do that?

1036
01:02:59.260 --> 01:03:01.140
Why do we think we have all the answers?

1037
01:03:01.140 --> 01:03:02.860
Why do we think the answers are somewhere else?

1038
01:03:02.860 --> 01:03:07.200
Why don't we just go to the person who has all the answers?

1039
01:03:07.200 --> 01:03:11.540
But and lots of times it's because of like shame and guilt and all the things that are

1040
01:03:11.540 --> 01:03:17.300
not productive because they keep you from like, oh no, I can't do that.

1041
01:03:17.300 --> 01:03:23.420
Well, I've just been now just going just like, even in the midst of it, I'm marching off

1042
01:03:23.420 --> 01:03:25.100
the cliff and I'm sitting there praying.

1043
01:03:25.100 --> 01:03:27.460
I'm like, I'm marching off this cliff, God, do you see me?

1044
01:03:27.460 --> 01:03:29.860
I'm praying right now.

1045
01:03:29.860 --> 01:03:32.700
You know, I'm like, I need your help.

1046
01:03:32.700 --> 01:03:34.580
I need the information.

1047
01:03:34.580 --> 01:03:37.360
And then God shows up and does great things.

1048
01:03:37.360 --> 01:03:44.360
So that's kind of like some of my testimony now.

1049
01:03:44.360 --> 01:03:46.360
So I just want to encourage you with that.

1050
01:03:46.360 --> 01:03:49.160
Allah, thank you for sharing Paul.

1051
01:03:49.160 --> 01:03:57.960
I'm going to get a run off a cliff while you're praying right now.

1052
01:03:57.960 --> 01:04:04.200
Just a comment, David, it's fascinating to hear.

1053
01:04:04.200 --> 01:04:06.740
You just said two different things.

1054
01:04:06.740 --> 01:04:14.380
You said, go deeper instead of pulling away in relationships, run off the cliff, you know,

1055
01:04:14.380 --> 01:04:15.380
go for it.

1056
01:04:15.380 --> 01:04:20.540
And then you also said, when there's not grace on something or peace, sometimes you need

1057
01:04:20.540 --> 01:04:21.940
to pull back.

1058
01:04:21.940 --> 01:04:25.820
And the only way to sort that out is relationship with Jesus.

1059
01:04:25.820 --> 01:04:27.180
Yeah.

1060
01:04:27.180 --> 01:04:28.180
So true.

1061
01:04:28.180 --> 01:04:29.180
Yeah.

1062
01:04:29.180 --> 01:04:30.180
No.

1063
01:04:30.180 --> 01:04:31.180
Yeah.

1064
01:04:31.180 --> 01:04:34.060
And Chris, thank you for sharing that because there is a lot of irony.

1065
01:04:34.060 --> 01:04:36.180
It's not just one little principle.

1066
01:04:36.180 --> 01:04:40.860
And relationship is just like that.

1067
01:04:40.860 --> 01:04:44.420
That is just like that.

1068
01:04:44.420 --> 01:04:45.420
So good.

1069
01:04:45.420 --> 01:04:50.180
Thank you for sharing that.

1070
01:04:50.180 --> 01:04:52.940
Anybody else got anything to share tonight?

1071
01:04:52.940 --> 01:04:57.100
My last few moments.

1072
01:04:57.100 --> 01:04:58.540
I got an encouraging story.

1073
01:05:00.880 --> 01:05:01.520
Good news.

1074
01:05:04.960 --> 01:05:10.800
Real quick, you asked us to, you gave us some sort of assignment to take some sort of positive

1075
01:05:10.800 --> 01:05:17.120
step forward. I can't remember specifically, but real quick for me, I was in Sarasota. I found

1076
01:05:17.840 --> 01:05:26.240
for a long, kind of a long weekend vacation, found a local boxing gym and in the middle of

1077
01:05:26.240 --> 01:05:34.800
kind of reaching for, well, I was going for my phone and there was this other member that the

1078
01:05:34.800 --> 01:05:39.360
gym, standing right there, she was attractive. And I said, excuse me, I'm just gonna grab my

1079
01:05:39.360 --> 01:05:44.880
phone. Anyway, she turned around and we started a conversation. She said, Oh, I'm moving. I'm

1080
01:05:44.880 --> 01:05:50.640
actually moving to the Raleigh, North Carolina area like in two weeks. And so normally I would

1081
01:05:50.640 --> 01:05:57.840
just say, Oh, that's great. I'm from, I live in Raleigh, Raleigh, North Carolina. Oh, that's

1082
01:05:57.840 --> 01:06:02.640
great. I was like, well, why don't, why don't I welcome you when you get to town? Which was like

1083
01:06:02.640 --> 01:06:08.320
a big, like a big step for me. So, and it was really, I think in the back of my mind is rattling

1084
01:06:08.320 --> 01:06:15.200
around to your assignment of taking some sort of positive step forward and in some sort of female

1085
01:06:15.200 --> 01:06:21.760
capacity. So yeah. So let me share that was a big deal for me. And we did, we did say something

1086
01:06:21.760 --> 01:06:25.680
like, you know, do something like make eye contact. Just like the simplest thing. It's just

1087
01:06:25.680 --> 01:06:32.000
like, you know, practice like that, you know, that approach practice the, like what a smooth

1088
01:06:32.000 --> 01:06:35.760
little thing. Let me, let me welcome you to town when you get in town. That's pretty smooth. I like

1089
01:06:35.760 --> 01:06:42.720
that. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you for sharing that Rob. That's good. Rob, did you spar with her? Did

1090
01:06:42.720 --> 01:06:49.200
you like punch her in the face? Not a bad idea, right? But I didn't.

1091
01:06:52.320 --> 01:06:59.840
That's funny. Maybe, maybe you should, I don't know. Not, not a good idea.

1092
01:07:01.840 --> 01:07:08.240
Guys, God bless. Thank you so much for showing up tonight. Thank you for sharing all of you.

1093
01:07:09.040 --> 01:07:13.280
So much value in what you shared tonight. I got a lot out of it.

1094
01:07:13.280 --> 01:07:20.000
I hope you got a lot out of being encouraged and lifted up that, that

1095
01:07:22.720 --> 01:07:25.040
two principles that, that prioritizing

1096
01:07:28.800 --> 01:07:31.280
agenda over relationship. That's a big one.

1097
01:07:32.240 --> 01:07:38.640
That's a big one in your relationships. That's when I get caught up on all the time.

1098
01:07:40.560 --> 01:07:44.320
If there's anything that, you know, like that probably gets the biggest

1099
01:07:45.200 --> 01:07:51.280
rub between me and my wife is me prioritizing, but I'm just trying to finish this. I'm just

1100
01:07:51.280 --> 01:07:55.680
trying to do like everything I'm doing is like good thing. It's like, it's not like I'm like,

1101
01:07:55.680 --> 01:07:59.760
I'm just trying to lay this one last gambling bet. I mean, it's not like I'm doing that.

1102
01:07:59.840 --> 01:08:04.400
It's not like bad things. It's just like everything I'm doing is, is part of the plan,

1103
01:08:04.400 --> 01:08:11.680
part of productivity, part of doing like, right. But I just find myself sometimes prioritizing

1104
01:08:12.240 --> 01:08:16.720
my agenda, what I have to get done or what I'm concentrating on or what I'm, you know,

1105
01:08:16.720 --> 01:08:22.479
like, I'm just trying to like do the thing over relationship. So that's like a, that's like a big,

1106
01:08:23.200 --> 01:08:27.040
that's like a big deal. And then the second one, of course, is just like

1107
01:08:27.600 --> 01:08:30.800
taking up the risk, like taking up the responsibility.

1108
01:08:32.800 --> 01:08:39.040
Now you have to take that with a grain of salt because some people like take on too much and

1109
01:08:39.040 --> 01:08:42.080
they're like, they're taking like, oh, this is mine. I've got to do this. I've got to do this.

1110
01:08:42.080 --> 01:08:49.600
I've got to do this. No, it's about leveling up into the weight of the responsibility of what it

1111
01:08:49.920 --> 01:08:59.040
is that you feel before God, honestly, not some religious way, but honestly, before God,

1112
01:08:59.040 --> 01:09:07.439
what is your responsibility? Like, where can you be the strength in your family for your wife,

1113
01:09:07.439 --> 01:09:14.160
for your kids, for your, even your own life? Where, where is, where is the level of responsibility?

1114
01:09:14.240 --> 01:09:18.960
Where, where is, where is the level of responsibility? Where does the weight

1115
01:09:18.960 --> 01:09:25.920
hold? And if you feel like you can't hold the weight, then it's a matter of like the exercise

1116
01:09:25.920 --> 01:09:31.040
until you can. It's like, God, I know I was supposed to step into this role and be this,

1117
01:09:31.600 --> 01:09:37.120
but I just don't feel like I can. I don't know how I don't understand. I'm missing. I keep on

1118
01:09:37.120 --> 01:09:43.680
missing it. And that's just, that's the, that's the continuing to show up part is continue to

1119
01:09:43.680 --> 01:09:48.319
show up, show up. Yeah. Well, at least I'm showing up. Well, you screwed up and you missed this.

1120
01:09:48.319 --> 01:09:54.880
Yeah. But at least I'm showing up a lot. Like that's a lot of what happens to our culture.

1121
01:09:54.880 --> 01:10:00.000
I think a lot of men, they just stop showing up. It's like, you know what? That's freaking ridiculous.

1122
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:03.480
because I'll never do this, I'm not doing this.

1123
01:10:03.480 --> 01:10:05.320
I'm just gonna go sit on the couch, drink a beer,

1124
01:10:05.320 --> 01:10:09.200
and watch the game, you know?

1125
01:10:09.200 --> 01:10:14.200
And they give up, they abdicate their position of strength,

1126
01:10:14.640 --> 01:10:16.040
their position of authority.

1127
01:10:17.040 --> 01:10:22.040
So it's like stepping up into the righteousness of God,

1128
01:10:22.480 --> 01:10:24.120
the responsibility.

1129
01:10:24.120 --> 01:10:27.080
So I'll leave you with that tonight, guys.

1130
01:10:27.080 --> 01:10:29.800
God bless you, I love y'all.

1131
01:10:29.840 --> 01:10:32.480
I pray blessing and grace and ease over you.

1132
01:10:32.480 --> 01:10:36.320
I pray for victory, I pray for breakthrough.

1133
01:10:36.320 --> 01:10:38.840
I pray for healing for each one of you.

1134
01:10:38.840 --> 01:10:41.680
In Jesus' name we pray, amen and amen.