WEBVTT

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Awesome. Welcome, ladies. So today is October 8. This is your one o'clock Tuesday check-in.

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I'm Carla Johnson. I'm one of your coaches here at Last Year Single in Phase 2.

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So if you are new to Phase 2, go ahead and give me a little hand raise.

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Or if maybe this is your first live, Siggy, I had a feeling. I wasn't sure.

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Okay, so you're going to be driving. No worries. I totally get it.

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A lot of times we're traveling or at work or stuff like that.

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But as soon as you can come back on camera, please do.

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All right. Well, welcome, Siggy, to your first Phase 2 check-in.

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Thank you.

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Good to have you here.

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So I'm going to go ahead and go over some housekeeping items.

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It's kind of what we cover each week.

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For those of you that have been here before, it's always good.

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Sometimes we throw some new information out there, too, for you.

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So always just make sure that you get that reminder.

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So, again, welcome.

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If this is your first time coming to a Phase 2 check-in, whether you're here now or you're watching in replay,

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we do put this in replay.

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So if you are watching us in replay, definitely make sure that you schedule time in your day on Tuesday to come to one of our live check-ins.

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We know that life can throw curveballs.

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So if you have to do it in replay, that's totally fine.

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But if you can come live, it's best if you do.

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Just a reminder, if you are new, we do have a series of five videos for you to watch.

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We ask that you watch those one video a week, okay?

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There's a lot of content in those.

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They're about a little over an hour long.

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We want to make sure that you are just sitting with that information, praying about it.

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You're asking the Lord to highlight to you something that he wants you to get from that, to glean from that,

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and that you take time to process that with us, okay?

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So just, yeah, again, take notes.

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See how you can apply what you're learning in that content to what you are experiencing in your current situation, okay?

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So if you are jumping into phase two out of phase one,

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you probably have already watched that Love Story Accelerator where we give you a seven-day challenge.

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I always put this in the housekeeping items because there's always a couple people that want to freak out with the seven dates.

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I'm here to tell you, you don't need to worry about it, okay?

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You don't have to freak yourself out.

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Take it one date at a time.

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A lot of people ask the question, do I have to get all my seven dates in in phase two?

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No, you don't, okay?

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It can take you three months if you need to, okay?

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You don't want you overwhelming yourself if you're not ready.

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Some ladies, they'll dive in.

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They're going off the high dive.

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They're ready to take the plunge.

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They're ready to get out there and start dating.

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Other ladies like myself, when I was in this program, I took some time, okay?

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It took me a little while, all right?

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I wouldn't suggest doing it the way that I did it.

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It took me probably about a year to get out and start actually get on an official date.

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So I wouldn't suggest that, but just know that we all are here to go at your own pace, okay?

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So don't sweat it.

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Don't play the comparison game, all right?

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So now that we've covered that, okay, so anybody that was like panicking about the seven dates, now I'm going to just kind of give you some housekeeping items about

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now that you're in phase two, what do you do, okay?

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So I already discussed that you had the five videos, but the most important thing to take from phase two is show up.

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That is the best thing that you can do, okay?

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Take it from me.

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I was in this program.

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I have seen all sorts of women come through here.

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I will tell you most of the success stories will come from those women that are showing up as frequently as they can, okay?

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I say this because oftentimes life can get busy.

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We can forget.

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We can put ourselves on the back shelf, and I just don't want you ladies to do that.

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You are in a season where you are investing in yourself.

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You're investing in what God has placed in your heart.

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So you owe that to yourself.

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You deserve that.

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You deserve to take that time for you.

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So if you're like me, I was a people pleaser.

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I was a single mom.

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I was like I got all these other things to do.

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I have all these other people to care for.

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took me this program to realize

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like I needed to take care of myself too.

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And so I just encourage you show up here in phase two, okay?

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So the best, so how can, okay, so you're like,

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all right, Carla, great, how do I show up here?

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Okay, so some things that you can do.

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Post and share in the app, all right?

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Share with us everything that's happening, all right?

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I'm talking heartwork stuff, your dating situations,

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even like, you know, getting out there

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if you're deciding to go online,

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what experiences you're having with that,

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what you're learning from the video content,

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maybe some breakthroughs that you're having,

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you know, what you're getting from the prayer calls,

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like come and share with us your life,

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like what is happening, okay?

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We're here as a community, we're your sister squad,

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we're here with you.

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What oftentimes happens is that women,

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they start dating and then they forget to come

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and share with us about what's happening

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in their dating experience.

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And then like stuff happens,

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whether you're getting triggered,

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whether you're in avoidant attachment

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and you're starting like, okay, no, I don't wanna do this,

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or maybe you're anxious

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and you're kind of like getting in your head,

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come and share that with us.

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Don't neglect coming and talking to us about that.

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We're here to help you see those blind spots

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when you're dating,

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because you just came through heartwork, all right?

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And I always like to tell ladies at coming to phase two,

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your heartwork isn't over, it never is over.

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I'm married y'all and I still have a lot of heartwork to do.

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Marriage brings a lot of heartwork out of you.

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So dating is gonna naturally do that same thing.

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So you've got some healing from your stuff in the heartwork

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and now that you're stepping into dating,

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there's gonna be things that you're gonna do differently now

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because you have new information, you have new tools,

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you have new things that you're learning here in phase two.

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So just make sure that you're communicating to us

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what you're feeling, what you're experiencing,

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what's happening in your life, cool?

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Thumbs up ladies, show up, share with us all your deets.

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All right, cool.

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Okay, so then when you are in the app

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and you're sharing with us,

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be mindful of the tabs that are in the app.

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So there's the all tab, there's the wins tab,

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there's the ask a coach tab

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and then there's the relationship milestone tab.

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One thing that I want you ladies to make sure

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that you're paying attention to is that ask a coach tab.

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Okay, so if you want one of us coaches specifically responding,

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please make sure that you click that ask a coach tab.

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It is just our way of making sure

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that we are getting to you as quickly as possible.

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So, and then when you are responding to other women

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in the community because that's another way you show up,

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get to know one another in this community.

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Your sisters here can be your friends for life, okay?

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I say that because I was in this program.

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A lot of the women that were in this program

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came to my wedding.

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They're still good friends of mine.

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Even before I got married and I was traveling

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with my young son, we would go on summer vacation.

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We traveled to new places.

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I'd figure out who was where and we would connect

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and we would hang out.

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Like there was one friend that is in Atlanta

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and she has two kids and me and my son

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would just stay with her when we were visiting in Atlanta.

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So, get to know your ladies here, okay?

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Find community here.

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So, respond to people in the app.

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Just make sure that you're not responding

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to anybody in the ask a coach tab.

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At any of the alls, wins, relationship milestones,

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definitely respond to those ladies.

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But we do ask that when you do,

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make sure that it's positive

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and that you're being encouraging, okay?

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It's really easy that when we come,

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like, because again, we want you all,

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if you are feeling lonely, discouraged, hopeless,

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like, it's natural you're gonna have

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some of those feelings and emotions.

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I can attest, I had those moments too.

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And I just needed to sometimes share that

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with my sisters here in this community.

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It was helpful when other people

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didn't jump on that same bandwagon.

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But instead, they were encouraging,

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they were sharing with me, like,

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look, I've experienced this as well,

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and this is what I did to lift myself up, all right?

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So, just let's be positive.

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Let's lift each other's boats.

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Let's make sure that we're doing that, all right?

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So, again, engage with one another,

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host in our community, and just connect, okay?

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And then come to as many live check-ins as you can, all right?

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Same thing with the prayer calls.

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That is, like, the meat of where you're gonna get,

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like, some breakthroughs, okay?

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Yes, we have the replays, but there's just sometimes,

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I mean, y'all, all you ladies are here,

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so you can...

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test to it. You get so much more when you're here live. We get it. Life happens. Sometimes you have

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to watch things and replay. I'm that way on the weekends. I would love to get to those supernatural

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Saturdays, but I have a son that is in travel baseball, so we're constantly doing tournaments,

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so I can't always jump on those. So we get when you have to watch and replay, but if you can make

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it a priority to come live, it is just going to fill you more, okay? And again, you're only in

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phase two for four to five weeks minimum, so utilize that time. Like, this is your time.

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As you can see, we're a smaller group here in phase two, and that's for your benefit. It's

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so that you can get more one-on-one coaching here with us and as you're stepping into that

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dating scene, because I know, I mean, raise your hand if anybody thinks of online dating,

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and they're like, I'm so excited. Not really, right? Now, raise your hand if you're like,

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online dating, I have to do this again. Like, I don't know. Like, this dating thing freaks me out.

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Like, yeah. I mean, totally. See? See? So look at your sisters here. We've all been there.

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It's not always the funnest, but we can make the most of it. We're here to support you. So show up,

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let us know what's going on. You know, we're your girlfriends here. We can sit, we can, you know,

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laugh about it. We can cut it up, but then we can also get real and raw, and we can help you

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process through some things that you're experiencing. All right? Cool? Everybody on board

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with that? Okay. And then the next thing is the app itself. So we do understand that, like,

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there are glitches. Okay? This is a new app, and it is phenomenal. Like, I can't tell you, like,

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how excited and pumped I was that now we get to get off Facebook, and we can have an app,

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because Facebook can be so distracting. So we do have this app that you can access on your phone,

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and you can access it on the desktop as well. So just know that there's two ways of doing it. I

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have to oftentimes do both, because sometimes there's a little bit of glitches on my phone,

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and then I have to shut that down, and then I go ahead and jump on the desktop. Okay? And then

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there's some things in the desktop that, like, for right now, we're working on getting the replays

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up and going. I've noticed that you can get them on your phone. I'm having a hard time getting them

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on my desktop. So sometimes you just have to figure out what works best, the phone or the

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desktop, at that time. So just be patient with us. Again, it's a new app. So like any new app,

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there's just going to be glitches that come with it. So just help practice patience with us. We are

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working with our developers of the app to fix all those kinks, and so we just believe that it's

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going to turn around, and we're going to have great things come from it. So with that being

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said, I know that some of you ladies will make posts, and after like 8, 12 hours, no coaches are

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responding. Trust the process. We are also experiencing glitches where sometimes we don't

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see those posts right away. So just know as soon as we see them, we are here to respond to you.

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We care about you. We are going to be able to respond to you as soon as we get those. So

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sometimes we don't see them right away, but again, we're working with our developers to fix

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all of those kinks, okay? So going back to, again, talking about the app, make sure that you check out

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that resource tab. There's so much good information there. That's where the SpiritMate match intake

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form is. That's where our affiliate program information is. There is even a tech training

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video that I encourage you all to watch. It helps you navigate the app a little bit better,

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and then there's also a link for the single cities. So I get a lot of questions in the app

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like Jackie talked about single cities. Where do I find it? Well, it's in the resource tab of your

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app, so check it out, and then we also have an Ask Jackie tab there as well. So any of your dating

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questions where you want to give some detail and you want Jackie's personal feedback, go ahead and

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put that in Ask Jackie. So again, you can come to our app, and then you can share it in phase two,

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and us coaches will walk you through that as well and give you our feedback on what you're

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experiencing, but you can also do that for Jackie as well in the Ask Jackie. So I always tell people

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do both. So we had someone last week that was experiencing a situation with her boyfriend,

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and we gave

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some feedback, and then we also brought it to Jackie at Love Seeds, and Jackie was able to give

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her feedback as well. And it just helped one of your sisters here process what was happening

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and get good, solid feedback from Jackie and us coaches here. So utilize that to your benefit,

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okay? I think that about covers everything. Oh, actually, one more thing. So email, all right?

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If you're going to email about SpiritMate, Match, Affiliate, all that kind of stuff,

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anything that's in that resource tab, you are not going to get a response from the team in those

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types of emails, okay? That's why we have that resource tab there is so that you can get all

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that information, okay? Now, when we do tell you to email admin, it's to transition over to phase

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three. So those of you that maybe have been here, you're finishing up your content, and you're like,

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okay, I'm just about done watching my videos. I've been here a minimum of four to five weeks.

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I'm ready to move to phase three. What do I do? That's when you're going to email admin

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at JackieDorman.com, okay? And then they will shift you over to phase three, okay? So you've

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watched your video content. You've come to live check-ins. You've been in phase two for at least

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four to five weeks, all right? So, Carissa, how single cities work, just be patient. We have

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teams of people that are operating those single cities, and so they have to just make sure that,

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because we only allow members into those single cities, so we just have to always make sure that

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we're checking to make sure that anybody that's requesting to be a member is also linked and

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signed up with our community. Because in Facebook, there's scammers, there's bots, there's all sorts

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of things. There's like people that are just like, they're like, oh, I want to hook up with single

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people, so they're going to join those groups. We specifically only allow people that are in our

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community and are paying members to join those single cities. So just be patient when you have

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those pending things, and the team of people are working on those for those cities. Cool?

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All right, I got through the housekeeping stuff, right? That always takes a lot, but

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it's always important to make sure that we cover. All right, so now let's go ahead and get into our

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teaching for the day. So raise your hand if you have watched the Divine Feminine video.

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I know a couple of you are brand new to the community, so you probably haven't gotten there.

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So I know Siggy, she was on a little bit earlier. She might have had to jump off. I know she was

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driving. Okay, so a few of you have watched that Divine Feminine video. Perfect. Okay, that is,

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honestly, it's like my favorite video of all of the content in our phase two. I just absolutely

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love it. So as I always say to people, I always love re-listening to it several times. It's just

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really, really good to get a reminder of what the Divine Feminine looks like, because not only are

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you going to have your Divine Feminine stepping in your dating scene, but you're going to still

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operate in your Divine Feminine when you're married too, okay? And it's real easy sometimes

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when we want to operate in a dark, toxic feminine, because we're human. We sin. We sometimes operate

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in that. So sometimes I have to check myself when I'm operating in that, so that I'm bringing my

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best self to my marriage, okay? So that's why I just absolutely love that video, because I do love

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how Jackie takes you through talking about the Divine Feminine through the eyes of the

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curse and in the garden. So a lot of times, we see feminine and masculine through

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the curse, but she takes it back to the garden to where we can see it the way that God intended and

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the way He created it. And so that's always such a great reminder for me to go back to my identity

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and my feminine and what God created me to be as feminine, okay? So we're going to talk about

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a few of those characteristics and traits that Jackie does talk about. So the first one, and if

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you want to take notes, you can, all right? I know some of y'all, actually all of y'all should be

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taking notes when you're watching the video. So if you've got your hand raised because you've watched

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the Divine Feminine, you've probably taken some of these notes already. Teresa's shaking her head.

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She's a note-taker. I can tell. I had a pastor years ago at my old church in Florida, and

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he used to joke, those of you that take notes get bigger mansions in heaven.

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So I've always been a note-taker because he's always said that. I'm like, well, I'll take mansions

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in heaven. I'm going to have all the people there. So I need space for those people.

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So take a note, good thing.

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All right, so one of the first characteristics

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that we talk about when it's divine feminine

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is the nurturer, right?

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Okay, some of you ladies, you might identify that,

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that you just got a natural nurturing trait about you.

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So what I wanna talk about here is that nurturer

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is about seeing potential in something

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and being able to plant it somewhere

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where it can actually be fed and nourished

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and it's going to flourish.

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So there's a difference here

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between nurturing and caretaking

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because many of us women will be caretakers.

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Many of you might be our mothers, all right?

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I was a single mom.

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Maybe you want children.

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Maybe you have grandchildren.

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Maybe you are an aunt to somebody and you help take care.

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Maybe your best friends have children

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and you help them out.

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We naturally have that gift,

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but nurturing and caretaking are two different things,

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especially when it comes to dating.

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So I think it's important to talk about what is caretaking.

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Caretaking is taking care of children

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or other people that might be in crisis

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who can't take care of themselves.

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People might start taking care of their elderly parents

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as they get older.

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That's caretaking.

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You're taking care of somebody

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who can't do things for themselves, all right?

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Nurturing is not caretaking.

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It's not doing things for people,

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like it's helping them do for themselves.

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That's nurturing, okay?

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So we want to make sure

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that when you're showing up in your Divine Feminine,

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especially with men, that you're not mothering men.

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You're not doing things for them

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that they can do for themselves.

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You're encouraging them.

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You're there to support them, all right?

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You're there to help out.

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We talk about the feminine is the easer, right?

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She's the helpmate of her spouse, right?

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But we're not doing things for people

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that they can do for themselves, all right?

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Nurturing is pouring into people

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so that they can grow into who God's created them to be.

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So it's operating in that sense, okay?

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Then that kind of goes into my next couple traits

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is counselor, all right?

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So the feminine just has a natural gift

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of being able to just give wise counsel.

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We take our experiences, what we've experienced in life,

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and we are able to pour that wisdom into other people.

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We have to be careful, though,

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that we are not playing therapist, okay?

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Some of us have that therapist hat.

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That's our profession.

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You know, we coach, we counsel.

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We do those types of things.

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We have to make sure that we're not showing up in that

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with our guys that we're dating, okay?

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We're not sitting there telling them what they need to do

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and giving them the advice of how they need to do it,

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all right, because again,

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that kind of goes back to that caretaking

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and telling someone what they need to do

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and how they need to do it.

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Y'all want men that have the three M's,

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that they're marriage-minded,

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they're masculine, and they're mature, okay?

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You don't wanna sit there and mother a man

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that's mature, masculine, and marriage-minded.

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It's just not gonna go well, okay?

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So you want a man that can take your wisdom

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and your nurturing sense and your counseling,

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and it can just help draw the best out of him,

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and he can grow into something, okay?

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So that goes into that next trait

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we're gonna talk about is that wisdom, all right?

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So oftentimes in scripture, when they talk about wisdom,

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they talk about the female, and so there's that.

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A lot of times when I think of wisdom,

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I also think of just having a natural intuition.

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Like you always hear about people saying

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a woman's intuition, like there's a reason for that.

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Women, like that's the divine feminine.

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God has given us that instinct, that intuition

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to be able to apply that wisdom, and it's to be helpful.

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What it's not, intuition is not suspicion.

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So Jackie does talk about some of those toxic female traits

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after the curse, and sometimes it can look like suspicion

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or yeah, judgment.

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Like we don't want to be suspicious of the people

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that we're dating.

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That's when that God-defendedness comes in,

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reminding ourselves that we don't have to be self-defended,

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but we're God-defended, all right?

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So we can take wisdom.

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God can give us wisdom about a person and saying, yeah.

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this is not someone that you want to continue going down the path of a relationship with.

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Maybe there's some red flags that are coming up. It doesn't mean that you have to go and be suspect

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and go finding every single red flag that somebody has because here's the thing, ladies,

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we all have yellow flags. I have yellow flags. My husband had yellow flag. You all have yellow

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flags. Guys that you're dating are going to have yellow flags. And if you turn on this, well,

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I'm just using discernment. I'm not sure if that, no, that's where you're being self-defended.

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You're being suspicious. You're being judgmental. We don't want that when we're stepping into the

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dating scene. Okay. You want to use God's given wisdom, intuition, and knowing that you are God

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defended. Okay. Because sometimes when we are self-defended, we're showing up with a broken

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and unhealed heart. And that's just not good either. And people can see that it can look

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picky. It can look negative. And men can be very just like sensitive to those disapproving spirits.

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So a healthy man is not going to want a woman who's kind of always like on suspect of what

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he's doing. All right. Like, so just keep that in mind. You are God defended.

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God has a way of letting you know what you need to know when you need to know it and if you need

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to know it. So we had a situation here with one of our sisters that, you know, she was in a

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relationship and, you know, she found, found out that he was struggling with some like pornography

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and, and things of that nature. And, you know, it just, it came to light. Like she didn't have

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to go searching for it. It just kind of came to light. And she had to process and have a

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conversation with him and decide what that was going to look like and whether or not he really,

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truly was working on himself or if it was something that, you know, he was still battling.

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And so she had to take that to the Lord. She took some wisdom and counsel from us here at

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last year single and was able to make a decision. So, but do you see how she wasn't having to go

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and like comb through his phone, search in his Facebook? I mean, cause I know some of y'all do

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that and I say it cause I did it too before this program. You're going in, you're going in their

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search history. You're looking up their Facebook. You're seeing what, what people they're friends

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with. You're seeing, Oh, he's got a lot of friends that are, you know, women and they're scantily

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clothed. And I don't know about ladies. Like we can't go in there with like suspicion. All right.

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Use wisdom intuition. It's why we talk about, you know, discovery dating and pacing yourself,

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getting to know somebody first, not jumping into the romance right away when you're dating.

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It's really take time to get to know a person, enjoy their company and not dive in into all

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those serious conversations or getting hot and heavy with the romance, hugging and kissing and

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all that kind of stuff. All right. I say it because I did that before this program. And I got myself

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in a lot of trouble and just, it caused a lot of heart, heart wounds that I had healed from.

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And thank God, God is a God of redemption and reconciliation. He could come in and he can

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heal all of those areas. But now that you've gotten the heart work and you're in this program,

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we want to help you take steps to where you're not falling in those same type of situations.

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Okay. Next trait is comforter. All right. So what I like to remember with this one is it just

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reminds me like comforter. I think of peace, Shalom. There's like a breathability about it.

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It's just, you're being an advocate. It's this profound psychological and emotional peace.

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I think of Isaiah 26, three, you will keep in perfect peace. Those whose minds are steadfast

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because they trust in you. All right. When we are leaning on the Lord and we are God defended

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and we are in peace with him and we are being comforted by our father, we naturally give off

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in the divine feminine, a way of being a comforter as well, because people will see

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how we're leaning on our Lord and our comforter, our Prince of Peace. And that comes out in

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how we respond to others. The next trait is meek. The divine feminine is meek. It's not weak. I know

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it rhymes, but it's not weak. It's actually, to me, meek is power under control. So there's

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no weakness to that. It's being able to

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deal with people in a kind manner, with humility and consideration.

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There's a gentleness, there's a softness, there's a vulnerability that takes great strength.

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And I say this, ladies, and I talk about being soft and gentle and vulnerable,

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because that is important to show up when you do find your spirit mate and you step into marriage.

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There's going to be times where you're going to have to be vulnerable with your spouse.

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And there's going to be a softness. And I will tell you from my experience now,

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like I'm a year in and my husband sometimes has a hard time being vulnerable himself.

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And so it takes me as his wife to show a softness and be a safe space for him to be

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vulnerable. Like I've had to learn. I haven't always created that space because ladies,

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I will tell you, like I am a structured, like I'm a closet control freak that I have to work

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on myself in. And I'm like a goat, like I'm like, this is how it's going to get done.

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This is how we're going to do it. We got a plan. We're going to take action. We're going to go.

446
00:31:09.280 --> 00:31:13.440
But sometimes it can come off very rigid. And I have to remind myself that I have to

447
00:31:13.440 --> 00:31:17.920
be a safe space for my husband. I have to be soft. Same thing with my kids.

448
00:31:18.480 --> 00:31:24.160
Like they need to know that like I'm a safe place to land. I can't always be rigid

449
00:31:24.160 --> 00:31:28.160
and all that kind of stuff. So there's a meekness about it that I have to show

450
00:31:28.160 --> 00:31:34.080
up where I can still have control, but I don't have to dominate. All right.

451
00:31:34.960 --> 00:31:39.600
Sometimes this boss babes, if you're a boss, babe, you get this. We can, you know,

452
00:31:40.960 --> 00:31:45.040
we can be strong will, we can have like all this power, all that kind of stuff.

453
00:31:45.040 --> 00:31:50.000
And really it just like it, you got to just, sometimes it's like,

454
00:31:50.000 --> 00:31:57.760
sometimes you get more when you're soft. Right. So that's with that being said, let's work on

455
00:31:57.760 --> 00:32:04.800
being soft, vulnerable, gentle. We can still be strong, but we don't have to be rigid.

456
00:32:04.800 --> 00:32:10.320
We want to be approachable. Okay. Men want women that are approachable. Okay.

457
00:32:10.400 --> 00:32:16.080
Cause let me tell you men, women can be intimidating for men. I was told early on

458
00:32:16.080 --> 00:32:23.040
before I met Jackie by my therapist and he's, he's wonderful. He's just like, you're intimidating,

459
00:32:23.600 --> 00:32:28.000
you're intimidating to men. And I was like, what do you mean? So it's, you know, it's not

460
00:32:28.000 --> 00:32:32.400
necessarily a bad thing. It was being able to channel my divine feminine so that it was

461
00:32:32.400 --> 00:32:37.840
approachable and that men could feel at ease around me and know that, you know,

462
00:32:37.840 --> 00:32:43.360
and then they want to come in and men want to be those protectors and providers and they want to

463
00:32:43.360 --> 00:32:50.160
feel masculine. Okay. And so I have to sometimes take a seat to my like boss, babe, let's get,

464
00:32:50.160 --> 00:32:57.920
get her done type mentality that my husband can come in and like, you know, be the problem solver

465
00:32:57.920 --> 00:33:04.080
and be like, okay, this is how we go do it. All right. Another trait of the divine feminine

466
00:33:04.800 --> 00:33:11.760
Another trait of the divine feminine is being receptive. So we are physically and spiritually

467
00:33:11.760 --> 00:33:17.920
made to be receivers. All right. So it's just being able to take in and receive.

468
00:33:18.560 --> 00:33:24.560
And so I know some of you and I, like I, I struggled with this. Some of y'all are going

469
00:33:24.560 --> 00:33:30.720
on dates and you have a hard time allowing men to pay for you. Raise your hand. If like,

470
00:33:31.680 --> 00:33:39.280
that makes you uncomfortable, nobody here. Okay. Kaylee, Kylie, Kylie. Sorry. My,

471
00:33:39.280 --> 00:33:45.760
my screen's a little small here. Yes. I get that. I had a really hard time because I was like,

472
00:33:45.760 --> 00:33:50.640
oh my gosh, men are just going to think I'm a gold digger and that's not what I am. And da da da da

473
00:33:50.640 --> 00:33:57.120
no, like men want to be able to do that. Now with time, like after a few dates and you're starting,

474
00:33:57.120 --> 00:34:00.880
maybe you're into a level three, like, yeah, there's times that you can share the cost.

475
00:34:00.880 --> 00:34:05.360
All right. I had to do that in my long distance relationship. My husband and I,

476
00:34:05.360 --> 00:34:08.560
like we were always traveling to go see each other before we got married.

477
00:34:09.280 --> 00:34:14.000
He was the majority of the time he's like, you know, made the most money he helped out,

478
00:34:14.000 --> 00:34:19.280
but there were times I'm like, Hey, let me go ahead and cover this. Oh, Hey, let me go ahead

479
00:34:19.280 --> 00:34:27.120
and, um, grab our drinks here or whatever. Like I would find ways to help like contribute,

480
00:34:27.120 --> 00:34:36.159
but it's okay. Ladies to allow the men to pay for you. Okay. God had to show me how to get

481
00:34:36.159 --> 00:34:40.560
comfortable with that. He used one of, um, a college friend of mine that moved from

482
00:34:40.560 --> 00:34:45.440
Chicago down to Florida at the time. And we were hanging out while I was in this program

483
00:34:45.440 --> 00:34:49.840
and I considered it a date. It wasn't a guy that I was going to date. Like he wasn't a romantic

484
00:34:49.840 --> 00:34:54.080
interest. He was like one of my good college buddies, but I was like, God showed me like,

485
00:34:54.880 --> 00:34:59.840
even my guy friends could pay for me and it was okay. And they enjoyed doing.

486
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:04.360
that. Like sometimes guys actually like that. Okay, so

487
00:35:04.360 --> 00:35:08.640
it's totally okay to be receptive and receive and take

488
00:35:08.640 --> 00:35:12.840
in and and allow them to do things for you. Some of you have

489
00:35:12.840 --> 00:35:18.280
a hard time asking men to help you out around. Like at the

490
00:35:18.280 --> 00:35:22.480
store, like I used to like me and the girls in my community

491
00:35:22.480 --> 00:35:28.040
when I joined this, this program, we used to make trips

492
00:35:28.040 --> 00:35:32.760
to Home Depot and Lowe's because that's where men were. And so we

493
00:35:32.760 --> 00:35:36.640
would go out. And it was like a thing like us ladies, like we

494
00:35:36.640 --> 00:35:39.720
would go in our community and our and we would share, hey,

495
00:35:39.720 --> 00:35:42.960
went to Home Depot today, you know, ask this guy to help me

496
00:35:42.960 --> 00:35:46.480
know, grab a can of paint off the top shelf, figured it out

497
00:35:46.480 --> 00:35:49.760
myself. I could have done it, right? I was a single

498
00:35:49.760 --> 00:35:53.160
independent woman, right? Like, that's how we all like to think.

499
00:35:53.760 --> 00:35:58.200
But I purpose like we purposely made an effort to allow men to

500
00:35:58.200 --> 00:36:03.280
come help us. Let men open your doors, ladies. Okay. I know I

501
00:36:03.280 --> 00:36:07.000
used to live in Florida. And now I live in Texas. Let me tell you,

502
00:36:07.040 --> 00:36:11.240
Texas has some really great gentlemen. So yeah, like if

503
00:36:11.240 --> 00:36:13.800
you're open a long distance, you don't live to Texas, look for a

504
00:36:13.800 --> 00:36:18.760
Texas man. Because those men love to open your doors. Like my

505
00:36:18.760 --> 00:36:23.120
husband yells at me, not yells, but he gets on me and makes me

506
00:36:23.120 --> 00:36:26.120
shut my door if I open my own door. And like sometimes I'm

507
00:36:26.120 --> 00:36:31.480
like, babe, it's Texas. It's it's 150 degrees like I need

508
00:36:31.600 --> 00:36:35.360
air, like get me out of this car. Like, I'll let you open my

509
00:36:35.360 --> 00:36:40.120
door, but I better see you sprinting to my door. Otherwise,

510
00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:43.600
I'm going to need to like relieve myself. But let men do

511
00:36:43.600 --> 00:36:47.720
those things for you. So if that speaks to some of you ladies,

512
00:36:47.880 --> 00:36:52.320
I'm going to activate you ladies this week. Allow, allow a man to

513
00:36:52.320 --> 00:36:57.440
help you this week. Let a man open your door. You know, go to

514
00:36:57.440 --> 00:37:01.320
Home Depot. I mean, find something that maybe you need to

515
00:37:01.320 --> 00:37:04.840
do around your house and like ask, ask a guy for his advice.

516
00:37:05.040 --> 00:37:10.440
Hey, I've got I've got to change my my doorknob like which one of

517
00:37:10.440 --> 00:37:13.400
these do you think is a better doorknob like like, whatever,

518
00:37:13.400 --> 00:37:17.640
like just try it. Like guys like to do that. They like to

519
00:37:17.640 --> 00:37:22.560
feel important. So be willing to receive from guys. And then the

520
00:37:22.560 --> 00:37:26.840
last one I'm going to talk about is fun. All right. This is

521
00:37:26.840 --> 00:37:30.240
something that I always have to work on is sometimes because

522
00:37:30.240 --> 00:37:33.800
again, I can get in my zone I can get in my control. Like we

523
00:37:33.800 --> 00:37:36.280
have a mission and we got something to complete. But

524
00:37:36.280 --> 00:37:41.160
sometimes I forget to let my hair down and have fun. All

525
00:37:41.160 --> 00:37:45.400
right, men do like youthful, playful spirit. Okay. It

526
00:37:45.400 --> 00:37:48.160
doesn't mean that you can't be serious at times if you're like

527
00:37:48.160 --> 00:37:51.240
me, because I'm like, I can't be fun all the time. Like sometimes

528
00:37:51.240 --> 00:37:54.680
we gotta get serious. I'm not saying that you have to be fun

529
00:37:54.720 --> 00:37:59.360
all the time. But you can get serious at times. But be willing

530
00:37:59.360 --> 00:38:03.560
to let your hair down. Let men see a fun, playful side to you.

531
00:38:03.800 --> 00:38:06.840
Especially on those dates, go do activities, go miniature

532
00:38:06.840 --> 00:38:12.080
golfing, go to go to Topgolf go, we have a thing. We had it

533
00:38:12.080 --> 00:38:16.480
in Sarasota, where I originally was from. But they have them now

534
00:38:16.480 --> 00:38:18.960
here in the Dallas Fort Worth area. It's called pop stroke.

535
00:38:18.960 --> 00:38:22.560
It's like Topgolf, but for miniature golf, and it looks

536
00:38:22.560 --> 00:38:26.000
like a golf course, like, go have fun doing that. Go axe

537
00:38:26.000 --> 00:38:30.000
throwing, go bowling, go, go let your hair down, have fun. Okay,

538
00:38:30.000 --> 00:38:33.360
find dates that you can do that. Okay, because men do like to see

539
00:38:33.360 --> 00:38:40.680
that. Um, cool. All right. Huh, I feel like I've been talking a

540
00:38:40.680 --> 00:38:43.760
really long time. I want to give you ladies an opportunity here.

541
00:38:43.760 --> 00:38:49.360
So, um, I'm going to go ahead. It's like 40 minutes after so

542
00:38:49.360 --> 00:38:55.560
it's 22. So I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to, we're

543
00:38:55.560 --> 00:38:57.840
going to go ahead and do our breakouts. And we'll have some

544
00:38:57.840 --> 00:39:01.000
fun with it. And then we can come back and we can touch on a

545
00:39:01.000 --> 00:39:04.600
few more topics. And then I'm going to take y'all's question.

546
00:39:05.240 --> 00:39:08.760
But let's get let's get some fun. Let's get you all talking.

547
00:39:09.440 --> 00:39:13.880
Is there anybody that's on here that cannot unmute? I'd like to

548
00:39:13.880 --> 00:39:18.320
know ahead of time. Because I'm gonna put you in breakout rooms.

549
00:39:20.960 --> 00:39:25.240
I know some of you are not on camera. But I'm hoping that you

550
00:39:25.240 --> 00:39:29.400
can unmute. So I'm going to go ahead and copy and paste what I

551
00:39:29.400 --> 00:39:37.080
want you ladies to share with your sisters. See if this works.

552
00:39:39.880 --> 00:39:48.040
Okay. Alright, so I got it in the chat. So the first one, I

553
00:39:48.040 --> 00:39:50.720
just want you all to have a little bit of fun here. Okay, I

554
00:39:50.720 --> 00:39:53.840
know some of you are not ready for dating yet. Okay, that's

555
00:39:53.840 --> 00:39:59.040
totally fine. Don't freak out. Okay. I want you ladies to start

556
00:39:59.040 --> 00:40:00.160
sharing some of

557
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:04.180
your ideas with each other about fun dating questions.

558
00:40:04.180 --> 00:40:07.380
Okay, and then practice your responses to those questions.

559
00:40:07.380 --> 00:40:08.680
Because here's the thing,

560
00:40:09.660 --> 00:40:12.020
you can get to know your sisters

561
00:40:12.020 --> 00:40:13.580
with some of the same questions.

562
00:40:13.580 --> 00:40:15.880
It's no different when you're going on a first date

563
00:40:15.880 --> 00:40:19.460
with a guy than when you're hanging out

564
00:40:19.460 --> 00:40:20.440
with your girlfriends,

565
00:40:20.440 --> 00:40:23.100
or you're getting to know a new girlfriend.

566
00:40:23.100 --> 00:40:27.540
All right, so think of some fun questions

567
00:40:27.540 --> 00:40:30.280
where they're just get to know you questions.

568
00:40:30.280 --> 00:40:34.960
So you might have your go-to question on dates.

569
00:40:34.960 --> 00:40:36.320
So share that with your sister.

570
00:40:36.320 --> 00:40:38.360
Let's start generating some ideas

571
00:40:38.360 --> 00:40:40.840
because I know a lot of times people are like,

572
00:40:40.840 --> 00:40:42.960
oh, like I'm on this first date

573
00:40:42.960 --> 00:40:44.240
and I don't know what to talk about.

574
00:40:44.240 --> 00:40:46.880
I don't know what to ask because oftentimes,

575
00:40:46.880 --> 00:40:49.400
like if you were like me, I was deep dived.

576
00:40:49.400 --> 00:40:52.080
I mean, I was like giving everybody my life story.

577
00:40:52.080 --> 00:40:53.280
Like we don't wanna do that,

578
00:40:53.300 --> 00:40:57.460
but let's have some like fun, lighthearted,

579
00:40:57.460 --> 00:41:00.380
you know, interesting questions.

580
00:41:00.380 --> 00:41:02.580
I put on there, if you're stuck,

581
00:41:02.580 --> 00:41:04.460
Google fun dating questions.

582
00:41:04.460 --> 00:41:06.500
There's tons of them.

583
00:41:06.500 --> 00:41:08.500
So find a really fun one,

584
00:41:08.500 --> 00:41:10.220
share that with one of your sisters

585
00:41:10.220 --> 00:41:13.780
and then respond to each other's question, okay?

586
00:41:13.780 --> 00:41:17.180
Take about 90 seconds a piece to do that.

587
00:41:17.180 --> 00:41:19.740
And then what I want you ladies to do

588
00:41:19.740 --> 00:41:22.820
is think about those divine feminine traits

589
00:41:22.840 --> 00:41:26.800
that we talked about and share with your sisters

590
00:41:26.800 --> 00:41:27.960
in your breakout rooms,

591
00:41:27.960 --> 00:41:31.660
which one you wanna lean in to a little more this week

592
00:41:31.660 --> 00:41:34.780
and how you're gonna put that into action, okay?

593
00:41:35.680 --> 00:41:37.320
Any questions about that?

594
00:41:39.960 --> 00:41:41.060
Good.

595
00:41:42.200 --> 00:41:45.120
All right, let me get these breakout rooms going.

596
00:41:45.120 --> 00:41:47.080
There we go, breakout rooms.

597
00:41:50.480 --> 00:41:51.320
All right.

598
00:41:53.280 --> 00:41:56.400
All right, and I might have to move some of you around too.

599
00:41:56.400 --> 00:41:59.120
So just bear with me.

600
00:41:59.120 --> 00:42:00.360
I'm gonna open them up.

601
00:42:00.360 --> 00:42:02.480
Y'all have the questions, right?

602
00:42:02.480 --> 00:42:05.520
I know I think a few people just jumped on.

603
00:42:05.520 --> 00:42:06.800
Hopefully you get into a room

604
00:42:06.800 --> 00:42:08.200
with somebody that has the questions.

605
00:42:08.200 --> 00:42:11.000
If you can't, you should still be able to see them

606
00:42:11.000 --> 00:42:14.440
even when you go into your breakout room in the chat, okay?

607
00:42:16.720 --> 00:42:17.560
All right.

608
00:42:18.760 --> 00:42:20.080
They are open ladies.

609
00:42:20.860 --> 00:42:21.940
Go ahead and accept.

610
00:42:33.820 --> 00:42:37.420
But yeah, like use those questions with other people

611
00:42:37.420 --> 00:42:39.820
to help guide your program.

612
00:42:41.120 --> 00:42:41.960
Okay?

613
00:42:45.320 --> 00:42:46.320
All right.

614
00:42:47.600 --> 00:42:48.980
All right, got it.

615
00:42:48.980 --> 00:42:51.100
Use those questions with other women

616
00:42:51.100 --> 00:42:52.260
as you're getting to know them.

617
00:42:52.260 --> 00:42:54.780
Like I know some of you ladies have expressed

618
00:42:54.780 --> 00:42:56.500
that you're just not sure you're ready to date yet,

619
00:42:56.500 --> 00:42:58.140
which is totally fine,

620
00:42:58.140 --> 00:42:59.900
but it doesn't mean that you can't go out

621
00:42:59.900 --> 00:43:01.780
and make some new friends, like even girlfriends,

622
00:43:01.780 --> 00:43:03.940
because maybe a new girlfriend that you meet

623
00:43:03.940 --> 00:43:07.820
may have a connection that is your spirit mate.

624
00:43:07.820 --> 00:43:10.560
So I like asking those questions

625
00:43:10.560 --> 00:43:13.620
and I like helping you ladies remember,

626
00:43:13.620 --> 00:43:17.640
like dating doesn't have to be all about the pressure.

627
00:43:17.640 --> 00:43:19.840
It literally can be, you know,

628
00:43:19.840 --> 00:43:22.600
just even getting out there and getting to know people.

629
00:43:22.600 --> 00:43:24.840
So I think, did someone have their hand up?

630
00:43:24.840 --> 00:43:26.600
Nicole, did you have your hand up?

631
00:43:28.520 --> 00:43:29.360
Oh, I did.

632
00:43:29.360 --> 00:43:32.160
I was just saying, I agree.

633
00:43:32.160 --> 00:43:34.840
Like I was saying, oh, agreeing with whatever you were saying

634
00:43:34.840 --> 00:43:38.520
but I can also tell you what me and my person,

635
00:43:38.520 --> 00:43:41.200
Teresa, we talked about if that's where you're going, but.

636
00:43:41.200 --> 00:43:42.440
Yeah, no, go for it.

637
00:43:42.440 --> 00:43:44.040
I was gonna say, I'm gonna open the floor.

638
00:43:44.040 --> 00:43:46.600
I want you ladies to like, you know,

639
00:43:46.960 --> 00:43:49.520
let's just start having conversation here.

640
00:43:49.520 --> 00:43:51.120
I know a lot of times I take questions

641
00:43:51.120 --> 00:43:53.400
and sometimes I get like crickets,

642
00:43:53.400 --> 00:43:56.320
but like we can talk and you ladies can share

643
00:43:56.320 --> 00:43:57.880
like anything that you want to share about it.

644
00:43:57.880 --> 00:44:02.220
It doesn't have to be like a guy that you're dating

645
00:44:02.220 --> 00:44:03.800
or whatever or anything like that.

646
00:44:03.800 --> 00:44:07.080
It literally, whatever you want to share in this group,

647
00:44:07.080 --> 00:44:11.720
like it's, this is your community, like this is your time.

648
00:44:11.720 --> 00:44:15.160
So I would love to hear what y'all talked about.

649
00:44:15.160 --> 00:44:18.320
Yeah, so we talked about some fun questions

650
00:44:18.320 --> 00:44:21.160
and I think for me, one of the bigger things

651
00:44:21.160 --> 00:44:25.040
that I like to find out from the guys,

652
00:44:25.040 --> 00:44:27.040
like what do you like to do for fun?

653
00:44:27.040 --> 00:44:30.560
Because for me, I love to have fun.

654
00:44:30.560 --> 00:44:33.060
Like I want to rent a car and put the top down.

655
00:44:33.060 --> 00:44:34.320
I want to go play pickleball.

656
00:44:34.320 --> 00:44:35.840
Let's go throw some axes.

657
00:44:35.840 --> 00:44:37.560
Let's go for a hike.

658
00:44:37.560 --> 00:44:40.300
Let's, you know, let's get a group of people together

659
00:44:40.300 --> 00:44:41.840
and take a trip someplace.

660
00:44:42.040 --> 00:44:45.760
I'm all about having fun and like going to waterfalls

661
00:44:45.760 --> 00:44:47.200
and all that fun stuff.

662
00:44:47.200 --> 00:44:52.200
I think for me, like if they say something like,

663
00:44:53.160 --> 00:44:54.720
and I know that's kind of a generic question,

664
00:44:54.720 --> 00:44:55.840
but it's an important question to me.

665
00:44:55.840 --> 00:44:58.200
Because if they say, oh, well, it's football season.

666
00:44:58.200 --> 00:45:00.240
I'm like, oh heck no, my guys.

667
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.480
I mean, this joker is about to sit in front of the TV for hours and hours.

668
00:45:05.560 --> 00:45:08.640
Like I get watching a little bit of football, but that's not going to be

669
00:45:08.640 --> 00:45:10.440
my life during football season.

670
00:45:10.840 --> 00:45:13.740
Like I want to hear like, well, it's football season, so I like

671
00:45:13.740 --> 00:45:14.580
to watch a little bit of that.

672
00:45:14.580 --> 00:45:18.680
But I like to be active too and go and do like, if it's that, then that's one thing.

673
00:45:18.680 --> 00:45:20.520
But it's like, Oh, I'm a diehard this fan.

674
00:45:20.520 --> 00:45:22.240
I would be like, okay, well, you're going to die hard, right.

675
00:45:22.240 --> 00:45:22.560
With them.

676
00:45:22.560 --> 00:45:23.960
Cause I ain't doing it now.

677
00:45:23.960 --> 00:45:29.160
I'm not the one I like, you're not going to be more loyal to the football

678
00:45:29.200 --> 00:45:31.000
team than you are to our relationship.

679
00:45:31.000 --> 00:45:32.760
So that's something for me.

680
00:45:32.760 --> 00:45:36.260
Like, I, I love to like, have fun lap.

681
00:45:36.260 --> 00:45:37.080
Like I want to laugh.

682
00:45:37.100 --> 00:45:38.480
I want to eat good food.

683
00:45:38.800 --> 00:45:42.300
I want to go have coffee and just like have fun.

684
00:45:42.300 --> 00:45:43.120
And I want to laugh.

685
00:45:43.140 --> 00:45:44.600
Like I'm hilarious.

686
00:45:44.600 --> 00:45:45.200
I love that.

687
00:45:45.200 --> 00:45:47.460
I love that you can ask that question.

688
00:45:47.680 --> 00:45:48.200
I love it.

689
00:45:48.200 --> 00:45:49.280
You can ask that question.

690
00:45:49.280 --> 00:45:52.640
And then, you know, like if someone responds, like, you know, like, okay,

691
00:45:52.640 --> 00:45:54.000
that might not work for me.

692
00:45:54.400 --> 00:45:58.440
Like, or you can find out more information, like, okay, so you really

693
00:45:58.440 --> 00:46:00.360
love football, so what's that look like to you?

694
00:46:00.440 --> 00:46:04.080
Like, you know, cause again, ladies, we are getting into football season.

695
00:46:04.080 --> 00:46:05.580
See, I was opposite Nicole.

696
00:46:05.580 --> 00:46:08.760
I was the girl that was like, I will, I will fantasy

697
00:46:08.760 --> 00:46:10.480
football with the best of them.

698
00:46:10.880 --> 00:46:12.500
I'm all about watching it.

699
00:46:12.800 --> 00:46:14.040
I'm a sports girl.

700
00:46:14.040 --> 00:46:15.160
Like totally love that.

701
00:46:15.340 --> 00:46:18.400
So that's where you see, like you start meeting people and it doesn't mean

702
00:46:18.400 --> 00:46:19.600
that you completely write them off.

703
00:46:19.600 --> 00:46:21.680
You can still go on a date, but it didn't have to be romantic, but you

704
00:46:21.680 --> 00:46:23.120
can learn a little bit more about them.

705
00:46:23.880 --> 00:46:27.000
See, like ask them what that looks like.

706
00:46:27.520 --> 00:46:32.400
So for like, for one person, it's like, I love football, but I'm

707
00:46:32.400 --> 00:46:34.720
going to be watching like my team.

708
00:46:34.720 --> 00:46:37.960
I'm going to be watching like, you know, the Indianapolis Colts.

709
00:46:38.000 --> 00:46:39.960
I don't really care about any of the other teams.

710
00:46:40.000 --> 00:46:41.400
I just want to watch this team.

711
00:46:41.400 --> 00:46:43.360
Or like, my husband is a Dallas Cowboys fan.

712
00:46:43.360 --> 00:46:50.000
Like he, plus my husband, he loves sports, but I'm more of

713
00:46:50.000 --> 00:46:51.440
the sports nut than he is.

714
00:46:51.480 --> 00:46:53.840
Like he has to ask me questions.

715
00:46:54.480 --> 00:47:01.080
I'm like, it's funny, but I love that.

716
00:47:01.080 --> 00:47:03.680
Like, so, and again, that's a really good question too.

717
00:47:03.680 --> 00:47:06.520
It's like, what do you like to do for fun on the weekends?

718
00:47:06.800 --> 00:47:09.160
What's your typical Sunday look like?

719
00:47:09.640 --> 00:47:11.360
So you can be asking that question.

720
00:47:11.360 --> 00:47:13.680
I know a lot of you ladies like that question, cause you want to

721
00:47:13.680 --> 00:47:15.120
know, is the man going to church?

722
00:47:15.760 --> 00:47:16.480
Like, right.

723
00:47:16.960 --> 00:47:21.280
That's our like street way of seeing if they're a believer or not.

724
00:47:21.320 --> 00:47:21.840
Right.

725
00:47:22.280 --> 00:47:28.240
But if for you, you might want to know, is he like in a sports bar from, you

726
00:47:28.240 --> 00:47:32.920
know, one o'clock till eight o'clock at night, because he's watching all of the

727
00:47:32.920 --> 00:47:34.600
games because they do that in sports bars.

728
00:47:34.600 --> 00:47:39.920
I used to work at a sports bar and you had all the games on fantasy football.

729
00:47:39.920 --> 00:47:41.360
Like that's what you want to watch.

730
00:47:41.360 --> 00:47:43.600
You want to see how your players is doing.

731
00:47:44.160 --> 00:47:44.880
So I love that.

732
00:47:44.880 --> 00:47:45.400
I love that.

733
00:47:45.400 --> 00:47:46.640
That's one of your questions.

734
00:47:46.640 --> 00:47:49.880
So just to specify, I don't mind like that.

735
00:47:49.880 --> 00:47:50.760
They want to watch football.

736
00:47:50.760 --> 00:47:52.040
I love going to football games.

737
00:47:52.040 --> 00:47:53.400
Like I will go to a football game.

738
00:47:53.400 --> 00:47:54.560
Let's go have some fun.

739
00:47:54.560 --> 00:47:55.080
Let's cheer on.

740
00:47:55.680 --> 00:47:56.680
I love all that.

741
00:47:56.960 --> 00:48:00.960
But when they're like, I have like family members, male family members

742
00:48:00.960 --> 00:48:03.320
that are married, you know, to my aunts, whatever, whatever.

743
00:48:03.760 --> 00:48:07.640
And they will literally miss family events where they never see the family.

744
00:48:07.640 --> 00:48:09.640
And then they're in town and they're going to drink at the

745
00:48:09.640 --> 00:48:11.400
bar and also like watch football.

746
00:48:11.400 --> 00:48:14.040
I'm like, I see, like, I get being packed.

747
00:48:14.040 --> 00:48:16.200
Like I'll sit around and watch pickleball for a few hours.

748
00:48:16.200 --> 00:48:17.000
Like I get that.

749
00:48:17.000 --> 00:48:17.800
I don't care.

750
00:48:18.200 --> 00:48:22.160
But if that, if they're one of those people that are like so obsessed that

751
00:48:22.160 --> 00:48:27.040
were that are my life is that the whole season, I'm like, no, my guy, I can't.

752
00:48:27.040 --> 00:48:27.240
Yeah.

753
00:48:27.240 --> 00:48:27.960
I'm sorry.

754
00:48:28.080 --> 00:48:30.800
It's just not like you can see like, oh, they like football.

755
00:48:30.800 --> 00:48:32.240
But you're like, okay, tell me what that looks like.

756
00:48:32.280 --> 00:48:32.720
Let's go.

757
00:48:33.480 --> 00:48:37.160
And you can kind of like, see how do they respond to that?

758
00:48:37.200 --> 00:48:39.280
Are they, can they balance it?

759
00:48:39.280 --> 00:48:42.240
Well, like that's important.

760
00:48:42.240 --> 00:48:46.720
So you see ladies, how these questions can really help you see a little bit

761
00:48:46.720 --> 00:48:49.960
more and then you start seeing what you like, what you don't like.

762
00:48:50.320 --> 00:48:52.720
And it doesn't mean that you write men off, right?

763
00:48:52.720 --> 00:48:57.160
Like, so Nicole saying like, Hey, it doesn't, I can go to a football game,

764
00:48:57.880 --> 00:49:01.840
but she's, she's already aware of what she likes and what she doesn't like.

765
00:49:02.160 --> 00:49:04.200
So that's what she's getting to know a little more.

766
00:49:04.200 --> 00:49:05.480
She's not cutting the guy off.

767
00:49:05.480 --> 00:49:06.760
She's not cutting and running.

768
00:49:07.200 --> 00:49:08.280
Still entertaining it.

769
00:49:08.280 --> 00:49:09.880
She's getting to learn a little bit about them.

770
00:49:10.280 --> 00:49:10.800
Yeah.

771
00:49:10.880 --> 00:49:11.960
Go have a date.

772
00:49:12.200 --> 00:49:15.720
See if there's any other things that you have in common with them.

773
00:49:15.720 --> 00:49:18.840
Cause I'll tell you, there's things that my husband and I, we

774
00:49:18.840 --> 00:49:20.280
just do not have in common.

775
00:49:20.840 --> 00:49:23.160
Like, I don't mind going to movies.

776
00:49:23.280 --> 00:49:25.000
I like, I like movies.

777
00:49:25.680 --> 00:49:28.160
He's obsessed with needing to go to the movie theater all the

778
00:49:28.160 --> 00:49:28.480
time.

779
00:49:28.520 --> 00:49:29.840
Like, that's just not my thing.

780
00:49:30.080 --> 00:49:33.400
So sometimes I'm like, honey, why don't you go take one of the kids?

781
00:49:33.960 --> 00:49:37.480
Like, I don't need to sit and be in a movie theater.

782
00:49:38.000 --> 00:49:44.320
I like to be in my comfy clothes on my couch and I will just, I'll spend less

783
00:49:44.320 --> 00:49:49.080
money buying it on digital than I will to movie theater.

784
00:49:49.320 --> 00:49:52.680
So there's things like that you will have in common with your spouse.

785
00:49:52.680 --> 00:49:55.880
And then there's other things that you won't, and it doesn't mean like you

786
00:49:55.880 --> 00:49:59.960
don't marry a person because of that, but you get to see what you.

787
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:04.140
like what you don't like, how you want that to show up in a relationship.

788
00:50:04.320 --> 00:50:05.560
So all good things.

789
00:50:06.460 --> 00:50:07.080
Love it.

790
00:50:07.540 --> 00:50:11.660
I have a question, Carla, when it comes to that is like one thing that I think,

791
00:50:11.660 --> 00:50:15.920
and I don't know if this is, I'm genuinely asking you, but like, I think

792
00:50:15.920 --> 00:50:18.660
it's like, I am a very quality time person.

793
00:50:18.660 --> 00:50:23.980
And when I'm with someone, like I want to be with them, but I also think it's

794
00:50:23.980 --> 00:50:28.620
nice when we, cause I'm sure that like, we want to have, like, if they are

795
00:50:28.620 --> 00:50:32.280
interested in something different or I'm different, you know, it's nice to be able

796
00:50:32.280 --> 00:50:34.480
to like, do those things too.

797
00:50:34.480 --> 00:50:39.120
And like, kind of go off and have your, you time and kind of like, not like a

798
00:50:39.120 --> 00:50:41.280
bunch, but like, I'm very quality time.

799
00:50:41.280 --> 00:50:46.160
So it's actually hard for me to even say that, but I also know I need my time too.

800
00:50:46.200 --> 00:50:49.040
Cause I've I'm 39 years old and I've never been married.

801
00:50:49.040 --> 00:50:53.640
So it's like, I'm sure I'm going to be like, Hey, I just need a little, like

802
00:50:54.120 --> 00:50:56.880
maybe a little bit of time, like an hour, you know?

803
00:50:57.060 --> 00:50:58.980
No, I think that's really healthy.

804
00:50:58.980 --> 00:51:03.100
And I like, I, I can just share kind of from my own experience.

805
00:51:03.100 --> 00:51:09.980
So I also, I was, I was 39 when I met my husband now I'd never been married.

806
00:51:10.440 --> 00:51:15.580
Um, and so I wasn't used to having someone around all the time.

807
00:51:15.580 --> 00:51:18.300
I kind of, my youngest son, he would go to school.

808
00:51:18.300 --> 00:51:19.860
He'd go to his dad every other weekend.

809
00:51:20.100 --> 00:51:24.380
So I was used to going out and having time, but I also like quality time.

810
00:51:24.400 --> 00:51:26.220
I like to spend time with a person.

811
00:51:26.680 --> 00:51:29.560
My husband was married before he was a widow.

812
00:51:30.000 --> 00:51:33.900
Um, and so he was, he was used to married life.

813
00:51:33.900 --> 00:51:40.240
Now his wife had, um, I think he had been passed for a little

814
00:51:40.240 --> 00:51:45.680
under four years when we met, but he had other relationships that he was in after.

815
00:51:46.080 --> 00:51:52.120
Um, and he is like, he would, he would spend all his time with me if he could.

816
00:51:52.120 --> 00:51:55.560
And I'm like, okay, I love you, honey, but I need my space.

817
00:51:56.240 --> 00:52:00.440
So we've had to learn, like, he would even want to go to the grocery store with me.

818
00:52:01.440 --> 00:52:06.780
And I'm like, you walk too slow and we make too much time at the grocery store.

819
00:52:07.320 --> 00:52:13.320
Like, I love you, but honey, can I just, I need to just go grocery shopping by myself.

820
00:52:13.320 --> 00:52:14.640
I don't even like to bring my kids.

821
00:52:15.240 --> 00:52:19.040
Like, even when I was a single mom, I dropped my kid off at school.

822
00:52:19.360 --> 00:52:22.240
And like, I'd have like maybe two hours before I had to be at work.

823
00:52:22.280 --> 00:52:24.640
I was running to the grocery and getting my grocery shopping done.

824
00:52:25.580 --> 00:52:27.580
I just want to get in, get out and get what I need.

825
00:52:27.620 --> 00:52:28.780
I do not want to spend.

826
00:52:28.780 --> 00:52:33.780
I will tell you, like, before I finally had that moment with my husband, we would

827
00:52:33.780 --> 00:52:39.220
spend like four or five hours at grocery stores and I'm like, I can't do this.

828
00:52:39.260 --> 00:52:40.480
I'm like crazy.

829
00:52:40.740 --> 00:52:41.760
So I think it's healthy.

830
00:52:41.760 --> 00:52:48.060
Like you, you will learn what your quality time will look like and what

831
00:52:48.060 --> 00:52:49.780
your time away will look like.

832
00:52:49.980 --> 00:52:53.700
My husband, he doesn't need time away.

833
00:52:53.760 --> 00:52:57.240
Like he's, he could be around me all the time, whatever.

834
00:52:57.600 --> 00:53:02.760
Me on the other hand, like, I, I'm a little bit more like, believe it or not,

835
00:53:02.760 --> 00:53:04.760
ladies, I am a bit introverted.

836
00:53:04.780 --> 00:53:05.320
Okay.

837
00:53:05.760 --> 00:53:07.500
I think they call them an ambivert.

838
00:53:08.960 --> 00:53:13.160
I like to be around people and all that kind of stuff, but my energy gets

839
00:53:13.160 --> 00:53:18.960
depleted and I have to recharge by spending time by myself.

840
00:53:19.300 --> 00:53:26.500
And so I've learned that in my marriage and in my new family, like now I'm

841
00:53:26.500 --> 00:53:30.300
surrounded by three kids and a husband where before it was just me and my

842
00:53:30.300 --> 00:53:36.060
youngest, like I'm learning, I have to, to, to plan and communicate

843
00:53:36.060 --> 00:53:38.340
when I need space and time.

844
00:53:38.380 --> 00:53:40.620
And so there's a healthy balance of doing that.

845
00:53:40.940 --> 00:53:44.900
So I don't think there's anything wrong with being quality person, but also.

846
00:53:45.280 --> 00:53:48.480
Communicating with the person, what your needs are, when you need

847
00:53:48.480 --> 00:53:50.920
space and time and learning that.

848
00:53:50.920 --> 00:53:55.560
And that will come with, again, that just comes with time it's growing, it's

849
00:53:55.560 --> 00:53:59.720
learning, like, and I'm sure like if any of you have been married before, like

850
00:53:59.720 --> 00:54:03.320
Teresa, I think you've been married, so you could probably attest, like you

851
00:54:03.320 --> 00:54:08.240
will spend all that time still learning about a person, like you're still always

852
00:54:08.240 --> 00:54:10.640
learning new things and having to adjust.

853
00:54:11.160 --> 00:54:13.360
And so that will, that will come.

854
00:54:13.380 --> 00:54:17.940
So you'll, you'll learn what works for you and yourself.

855
00:54:22.460 --> 00:54:22.620
Yeah.

856
00:54:22.620 --> 00:54:26.420
I was going to also say that when Teresa and I were talking, the second question

857
00:54:26.420 --> 00:54:29.900
was just like, what are you working on with like the divine feminine, like

858
00:54:29.900 --> 00:54:36.500
qualities, like to, and for me, I hate this, this terminology, but it's okay

859
00:54:36.500 --> 00:54:40.300
if other people like it, but cause it had such a stigma behind it, but being a boss

860
00:54:40.320 --> 00:54:44.280
lady, like I am that I own my own business and I'm, you know, by the grace

861
00:54:44.280 --> 00:54:46.320
of God, you know, he's blessed it.

862
00:54:46.320 --> 00:54:48.720
And I'm great at what I do, but I also handle business.

863
00:54:48.720 --> 00:54:50.560
Like I just am good at what I do.

864
00:54:50.560 --> 00:54:57.480
So for me, I've had to learn to, I was telling Teresa, I went out on a boat

865
00:54:57.480 --> 00:54:59.400
with several people, guys and girls.

866
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:03.360
The guy, there was this one guy driving the boat.

867
00:55:03.360 --> 00:55:05.840
He probably shouldn't have been, long story short.

868
00:55:05.840 --> 00:55:07.800
They asked me for, they were like,

869
00:55:07.800 --> 00:55:10.520
Nicole, you know this area, you know, whatever.

870
00:55:10.520 --> 00:55:12.960
We're on the boat, I was like, oh yeah, so.

871
00:55:12.960 --> 00:55:14.680
They came over, the girl that rented the boat,

872
00:55:14.680 --> 00:55:16.720
she was asking me, well then this other guy got up

873
00:55:16.720 --> 00:55:19.000
and the two guys were trying to figure it out.

874
00:55:19.000 --> 00:55:21.600
And old Nicole would have been like,

875
00:55:21.600 --> 00:55:23.520
over there trying to chime in and help.

876
00:55:23.520 --> 00:55:26.080
But I was like, these two guys, I'm gonna let them do it.

877
00:55:26.080 --> 00:55:28.920
Because he's driving the boat, she's asking, you know.

878
00:55:28.920 --> 00:55:31.840
I just knew my place in the sense of like,

879
00:55:31.840 --> 00:55:33.360
if they want my help, they'll ask me,

880
00:55:33.360 --> 00:55:35.200
but these guys are gonna do it themselves.

881
00:55:35.200 --> 00:55:36.400
I was telling Teresa, it's hilarious,

882
00:55:36.400 --> 00:55:39.440
because 45 minutes later, we're still looking

883
00:55:39.440 --> 00:55:41.080
for the right place to turn into

884
00:55:41.080 --> 00:55:43.680
and I could have figured it out so much sooner.

885
00:55:43.680 --> 00:55:45.760
But you know what, I was just living my best life.

886
00:55:45.760 --> 00:55:46.600
I was sitting hanging out.

887
00:55:46.600 --> 00:55:48.680
Yeah, and you're going on the adventure.

888
00:55:48.680 --> 00:55:49.880
Yeah, we were on the adventure.

889
00:55:49.880 --> 00:55:51.840
We had nothing better to do, you know what I mean?

890
00:55:51.840 --> 00:55:52.760
So I was like, you know what?

891
00:55:52.760 --> 00:55:55.120
We get to ride around the boat a little bit longer.

892
00:55:55.120 --> 00:55:58.320
They got lost a few times, that's fine too.

893
00:55:58.360 --> 00:55:59.800
I was just chilling.

894
00:55:59.800 --> 00:56:03.400
So anyway, that's one thing like my whole life,

895
00:56:03.400 --> 00:56:06.560
like I'm very solution-based, very like resolution.

896
00:56:06.560 --> 00:56:09.080
I try to be a part of the, you know,

897
00:56:09.080 --> 00:56:12.120
solution and help and figure stuff out.

898
00:56:12.120 --> 00:56:14.080
And that's compassion and empathy to me

899
00:56:14.080 --> 00:56:16.600
is like helping and figuring out solutions and stuff.

900
00:56:16.600 --> 00:56:21.280
So me sitting back, even things in other areas

901
00:56:21.280 --> 00:56:22.400
with my brother and stuff,

902
00:56:22.400 --> 00:56:25.040
me sitting back and just letting men be men,

903
00:56:25.920 --> 00:56:29.120
just having the self-control to be like,

904
00:56:29.120 --> 00:56:32.120
you know, this is what I know we should do right now,

905
00:56:32.120 --> 00:56:33.800
but I'm just gonna let them do it.

906
00:56:33.800 --> 00:56:36.200
And that has been something I had to learn.

907
00:56:36.200 --> 00:56:38.600
And in the last year, I would say that like,

908
00:56:38.600 --> 00:56:41.520
God's really helped me in that, like.

909
00:56:41.520 --> 00:56:42.360
I love that.

910
00:56:42.360 --> 00:56:44.320
And ladies, like I want you to hear what she's saying.

911
00:56:44.320 --> 00:56:48.880
Like, this is what this program can give,

912
00:56:48.880 --> 00:56:50.000
like this gives fruit.

913
00:56:50.000 --> 00:56:51.920
Like this is the fruit of this program.

914
00:56:51.920 --> 00:56:55.320
It's recognizing so many different areas of your life

915
00:56:55.320 --> 00:56:58.200
and how you can apply it in just life in general.

916
00:56:58.200 --> 00:57:00.520
Like the divine feminine, you can show up differently.

917
00:57:00.520 --> 00:57:02.760
It doesn't necessarily mean like that's what you use

918
00:57:02.760 --> 00:57:04.360
to go out and date and all that kind of stuff.

919
00:57:04.360 --> 00:57:07.960
It's just you being the best version of yourself

920
00:57:07.960 --> 00:57:09.720
and learning how to navigate that.

921
00:57:09.720 --> 00:57:12.480
And so you'll learn that even that,

922
00:57:12.480 --> 00:57:15.280
just learning that piece is helping prepare you

923
00:57:15.280 --> 00:57:17.640
for what you're gonna step into in marriage

924
00:57:17.640 --> 00:57:19.840
and learning out when do you allow your husband

925
00:57:19.840 --> 00:57:21.320
to kind of take the lead?

926
00:57:21.320 --> 00:57:24.600
And when it's going to be beneficial for you as a wife

927
00:57:24.600 --> 00:57:27.640
to step in with your gifts and talents,

928
00:57:27.640 --> 00:57:28.880
being able to do that.

929
00:57:28.880 --> 00:57:31.720
So all important things.

930
00:57:31.720 --> 00:57:36.560
So I always stress oftentimes on these calls,

931
00:57:36.560 --> 00:57:40.320
just when you're dating, it's not just finding the husband.

932
00:57:40.320 --> 00:57:43.680
And if you let go of this idea of, is this my husband?

933
00:57:43.680 --> 00:57:45.000
Is this not my husband?

934
00:57:45.000 --> 00:57:47.800
And really look at it as this is a growing opportunity.

935
00:57:47.800 --> 00:57:50.280
Like what does God wanna show me through these dates,

936
00:57:50.280 --> 00:57:51.640
through this experience,

937
00:57:51.640 --> 00:57:53.680
as I'm preparing for when God's ready

938
00:57:53.680 --> 00:57:57.880
to bring my spirit mate into my life.

939
00:57:57.880 --> 00:57:59.040
It's really easy.

940
00:57:59.040 --> 00:58:01.160
Like I know sometimes we get zero focused

941
00:58:01.160 --> 00:58:04.240
in the now you've been through hard work, we're dating.

942
00:58:04.240 --> 00:58:06.400
And it's like, you just want the husband right away.

943
00:58:06.400 --> 00:58:09.400
Like that's a lot of people have that mentality.

944
00:58:09.400 --> 00:58:12.080
And so, but, and then they get, they find themselves

945
00:58:13.080 --> 00:58:16.160
with discouragement, loneliness, disappointment

946
00:58:16.160 --> 00:58:18.840
because it's not happening in their time.

947
00:58:18.840 --> 00:58:22.960
But I want you to understand there is,

948
00:58:22.960 --> 00:58:23.920
what does Jackie say?

949
00:58:23.920 --> 00:58:26.680
She talks about there is always a process

950
00:58:26.680 --> 00:58:28.240
that comes with the promise.

951
00:58:29.200 --> 00:58:31.640
And sometimes there's just a process.

952
00:58:31.640 --> 00:58:33.880
It's not saying that you can't have that.

953
00:58:33.880 --> 00:58:35.920
It's just saying, I'm going,

954
00:58:35.920 --> 00:58:37.880
God's gonna walk you through a process

955
00:58:37.880 --> 00:58:41.360
and help prepare you so that when he's ready

956
00:58:41.360 --> 00:58:45.280
to give that to you, you're stewarding it well,

957
00:58:45.280 --> 00:58:46.960
you're cherishing it.

958
00:58:46.960 --> 00:58:51.640
And it's such a gift and just being able to embrace that.

959
00:58:51.640 --> 00:58:56.200
And so taking this time to learn more about yourself

960
00:58:56.200 --> 00:58:58.520
and to show up as your best self.

961
00:58:58.520 --> 00:59:01.280
And sometimes that doesn't even look like, I mean,

962
00:59:01.280 --> 00:59:03.800
doesn't even have to be involved in dating.

963
00:59:03.800 --> 00:59:07.000
Like you, like for me, it took me a while

964
00:59:07.000 --> 00:59:08.480
to get out there and date,

965
00:59:08.480 --> 00:59:12.000
but I was still learning so much in this program.

966
00:59:12.000 --> 00:59:15.640
And it helped me prepare for when I was ready

967
00:59:15.640 --> 00:59:16.680
to step out into dating.

968
00:59:16.680 --> 00:59:19.080
And then my husband came and we met

969
00:59:19.080 --> 00:59:22.920
and I was able to kind of just already go on solid ground.

970
00:59:22.920 --> 00:59:25.280
I was already really established,

971
00:59:25.280 --> 00:59:27.840
like God had taken me through a process.

972
00:59:27.840 --> 00:59:31.440
And then it's also helping me through the season

973
00:59:31.440 --> 00:59:32.400
that I'm in right now.

974
00:59:32.400 --> 00:59:34.840
Cause let me tell you, there are struggles

975
00:59:34.840 --> 00:59:38.440
and there is hardship that comes with marriage.

976
00:59:38.440 --> 00:59:42.480
Like there is, you're blending, I'm blending family.

977
00:59:42.480 --> 00:59:45.160
So I have a son and he has two kids.

978
00:59:45.920 --> 00:59:47.720
I moved from Florida to Texas.

979
00:59:47.720 --> 00:59:49.800
There's so many different things that happen.

980
00:59:49.800 --> 00:59:54.040
And so just embrace this season right now that you're in

981
00:59:54.040 --> 00:59:56.320
and just glean everything that you can

982
00:59:56.320 --> 00:59:59.480
and learn the most about yourself and how to apply it.

983
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:03.000
I'm done talking. I'm going to give the floor back to y'all.

984
01:00:03.000 --> 01:00:05.160
Teresa, you had your hand raised.

985
01:00:05.160 --> 01:00:07.160
What do you want to share with us?

986
01:00:07.160 --> 01:00:13.320
When you're talking about dating and how it helps you to grow and stuff like that,

987
01:00:13.320 --> 01:00:15.200
Nicole and I did also talk about

988
01:00:15.200 --> 01:00:17.880
a previous boyfriend that I had before I got married.

989
01:00:17.880 --> 01:00:21.160
It was a very serious relationship.

990
01:00:21.160 --> 01:00:27.360
We lasted for two years and he was really fun to be around and all this stuff.

991
01:00:27.920 --> 01:00:33.520
One thing that I realized after we were not together anymore

992
01:00:33.520 --> 01:00:36.880
is that he lied to me a lot.

993
01:00:36.880 --> 01:00:41.600
Things started coming out and I started thinking about things differently

994
01:00:41.600 --> 01:00:43.040
that he had told me.

995
01:00:43.040 --> 01:00:46.040
I can be a little too trusting sometimes

996
01:00:46.040 --> 01:00:49.120
because I personally feel like lying is...

997
01:00:49.120 --> 01:00:53.680
except for the I'm fine and those little things.

998
01:00:53.680 --> 01:00:58.480
But generally, I'm not someone who lies, right?

999
01:00:58.480 --> 01:01:01.520
I can't afford it in other people.

1000
01:01:01.520 --> 01:01:05.320
When you were talking about it growing you and stuff,

1001
01:01:05.320 --> 01:01:09.520
I feel like it prepared me for when I met my husband.

1002
01:01:09.520 --> 01:01:11.560
Not that he lied or anything like that,

1003
01:01:11.560 --> 01:01:15.240
but I just found myself a little more discerning after that

1004
01:01:15.240 --> 01:01:19.400
because I just took everything he said as the gospel

1005
01:01:19.400 --> 01:01:22.560
and whatever he said, it must be true.

1006
01:01:22.560 --> 01:01:25.720
Even the part about he professed to be a Christian,

1007
01:01:25.720 --> 01:01:30.960
but there were quite a few things that didn't really line up that well with that.

1008
01:01:30.960 --> 01:01:35.640
He would go to church, but only because he was going to church with me.

1009
01:01:35.640 --> 01:01:36.480
Yeah.

1010
01:01:36.480 --> 01:01:39.280
There was a lot of those sorts of things that I started looking for

1011
01:01:39.280 --> 01:01:42.000
a little differently when I met my husband.

1012
01:01:42.000 --> 01:01:45.680
And I feel like it did help.

1013
01:01:45.680 --> 01:01:49.320
Yeah, I love that because you brought up something too

1014
01:01:49.320 --> 01:01:52.720
because I had a similar situation.

1015
01:01:52.720 --> 01:01:56.880
So my son's dad was very much like your ex-boyfriend

1016
01:01:56.880 --> 01:01:59.040
before you met your husband,

1017
01:01:59.040 --> 01:02:02.760
that professed to be a Christian, went to church, did all those things,

1018
01:02:02.760 --> 01:02:05.400
and then things started unraveling.

1019
01:02:05.400 --> 01:02:10.680
And I noticed he did a lot of lying and stuff like that as well.

1020
01:02:10.680 --> 01:02:12.480
And instead of going into it,

1021
01:02:12.480 --> 01:02:18.720
like I had this program where I was able to process through that experience.

1022
01:02:18.720 --> 01:02:23.400
So ladies, you can go back and process through those past relationships

1023
01:02:23.400 --> 01:02:26.280
and learn from them even now.

1024
01:02:26.280 --> 01:02:30.640
You can go back and say, okay, what was my part in this?

1025
01:02:30.640 --> 01:02:33.040
How did I not show up?

1026
01:02:33.040 --> 01:02:37.080
How can I, and not to shame me, not to guilt me,

1027
01:02:37.080 --> 01:02:38.920
because again, it wasn't about my fault.

1028
01:02:38.920 --> 01:02:40.680
It was, I just didn't know better.

1029
01:02:40.680 --> 01:02:44.720
So now that I have new information, go back and reflect,

1030
01:02:44.720 --> 01:02:48.560
like how, like, was I too trusting?

1031
01:02:48.560 --> 01:02:49.960
What did that look like?

1032
01:02:49.960 --> 01:02:52.080
Should I have asked more questions?

1033
01:02:52.080 --> 01:02:54.480
Should I have paced the relationship?

1034
01:02:54.480 --> 01:02:57.040
Should I, which that I should have done.

1035
01:02:57.040 --> 01:02:58.920
You know, there was so many things.

1036
01:02:58.920 --> 01:03:01.760
And so when I showed up after this program,

1037
01:03:01.760 --> 01:03:07.600
then I was able to kind of come back and reassess.

1038
01:03:07.600 --> 01:03:10.840
And then again, like show up as you're a better self

1039
01:03:10.840 --> 01:03:12.280
and learn more about yourself.

1040
01:03:12.280 --> 01:03:16.360
And so that, you know, you're not falling into those same traps.

1041
01:03:16.360 --> 01:03:18.440
And again, it doesn't have to be a blame game.

1042
01:03:18.440 --> 01:03:20.880
You don't have to have shame and guilt with it.

1043
01:03:20.880 --> 01:03:24.360
And you don't have to sit there and then be under suspect.

1044
01:03:24.360 --> 01:03:26.440
I mean, like, everybody's going to lie to me.

1045
01:03:26.440 --> 01:03:27.400
Like, it doesn't have to be that.

1046
01:03:27.400 --> 01:03:29.560
Again, it's going back into that God defended.

1047
01:03:29.560 --> 01:03:34.080
Okay, what steps can I do to help myself?

1048
01:03:34.080 --> 01:03:34.920
So I love that.

1049
01:03:34.920 --> 01:03:36.080
I love that you shared that, Teresa.

1050
01:03:36.080 --> 01:03:37.760
Thank you so much.

1051
01:03:37.760 --> 01:03:39.120
Ziggy, you've got your hand raised.

1052
01:03:39.120 --> 01:03:40.960
And then I'm going to also look at the,

1053
01:03:44.640 --> 01:03:45.480
what am I trying to say?

1054
01:03:45.480 --> 01:03:46.320
The chat box.

1055
01:03:47.320 --> 01:03:49.360
Ziggy, hi, how are you?

1056
01:03:49.360 --> 01:03:51.120
Welcome face two.

1057
01:03:51.120 --> 01:03:52.880
Thank you, thank you.

1058
01:03:52.880 --> 01:03:55.840
Well, when you were talking about becoming your best self,

1059
01:03:55.840 --> 01:03:58.280
it reminded me of what Carly and I talked about

1060
01:03:58.280 --> 01:03:59.120
in the breakout.

1061
01:04:00.240 --> 01:04:04.280
We are both similar in a way that we like to deep dive.

1062
01:04:05.240 --> 01:04:07.320
And when we looked at the first video,

1063
01:04:08.680 --> 01:04:11.920
I'm like, what do you mean staying on the surface

1064
01:04:11.920 --> 01:04:13.040
in the first days?

1065
01:04:13.040 --> 01:04:14.160
I am going deep.

1066
01:04:14.160 --> 01:04:15.840
I want to know this person.

1067
01:04:16.320 --> 01:04:20.800
How can I be myself if I have to be superficial?

1068
01:04:20.800 --> 01:04:21.880
I know that's not what it is,

1069
01:04:21.880 --> 01:04:24.080
but I mean, in my trade,

1070
01:04:24.080 --> 01:04:26.600
I want to dive into this week is wisdom.

1071
01:04:26.600 --> 01:04:27.720
How can I keep my heart

1072
01:04:27.720 --> 01:04:32.720
and how can I get substance without diving deep?

1073
01:04:33.960 --> 01:04:35.240
So I guess that's something,

1074
01:04:35.240 --> 01:04:37.160
if you want to coach us on that or me.

1075
01:04:37.160 --> 01:04:39.200
Yeah, so that's where, like, again,

1076
01:04:39.200 --> 01:04:41.640
like that's why I hope when you ladies

1077
01:04:41.640 --> 01:04:43.200
were in your breakout rooms

1078
01:04:43.200 --> 01:04:46.160
and talking about questions like dating questions,

1079
01:04:46.160 --> 01:04:48.520
it's being able to take that dating question

1080
01:04:48.520 --> 01:04:51.520
and then learn a little bit more about somebody.

1081
01:04:51.520 --> 01:04:54.840
And also, like, so like Nicole was saying,

1082
01:04:54.840 --> 01:04:56.800
like, what do you like to do for fun?

1083
01:04:56.800 --> 01:04:57.880
What's your weekend look like?

1084
01:04:57.880 --> 01:05:00.080
If they're saying football, then guess what?

1085
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:04.080
she's going to probably ask more questions about well what does that look like who's your favorite

1086
01:05:04.080 --> 01:05:12.320
team so then you're starting oh you know have you been to football games um you know do you

1087
01:05:12.320 --> 01:05:16.880
go to them often and then you can maybe oh i remember one time when i went to a football game

1088
01:05:16.880 --> 01:05:22.320
and this is what happened like you see how then it starts becoming more of a conversation and you

1089
01:05:22.320 --> 01:05:29.520
learn a little bit more about somebody i also think it's important to remind you all that you

1090
01:05:29.520 --> 01:05:38.560
don't have to find out everything in one day it's okay to have several dates before you make a

1091
01:05:38.560 --> 01:05:44.640
choice of whether or not you want to continue getting to know a person it can take three four

1092
01:05:44.640 --> 01:05:50.640
dates before you really decide do i want to continue to get to know them and even then you

1093
01:05:50.640 --> 01:05:56.080
don't have to decide right out the gate whether or not you really like the person or not like

1094
01:05:56.080 --> 01:06:02.480
my husband and i like we were you know messaging back and forth and in talking because our

1095
01:06:02.480 --> 01:06:06.000
situation is different because again we're long distance when you have long distance sometimes

1096
01:06:06.000 --> 01:06:12.560
it looks a little different you know there was conversations that we had that i was like okay

1097
01:06:12.560 --> 01:06:18.240
that was a very like something that maybe god downloaded to me that you know i would have in

1098
01:06:18.240 --> 01:06:22.320
common with my husband and then there was other conversations that we had and i'm like i don't

1099
01:06:22.320 --> 01:06:29.120
know about this guy i'm not sure you know and i wasn't i wasn't fully sure right away and so it

1100
01:06:29.120 --> 01:06:36.560
took several weeks for me to warm up to the fact of whether or not i really wanted to invest a lot

1101
01:06:36.560 --> 01:06:43.200
of time with this person it's okay like you don't have to find out everything and you don't have to

1102
01:06:43.200 --> 01:06:51.440
go after a first date whether or not it's a love connection or not like honestly like jackie will

1103
01:06:51.440 --> 01:07:00.320
even mention oftentimes if you meet someone and it's instantaneous and there's romance and there's

1104
01:07:00.320 --> 01:07:06.080
like physical attraction and all that a lot of times that's not the healthiest way to start out

1105
01:07:06.080 --> 01:07:13.600
a relationship so sometimes it really is about like looking at it is you want to date your best

1106
01:07:13.600 --> 01:07:20.320
friend you want to get to know them and get to know them as a best friend again like not and i don't

1107
01:07:20.320 --> 01:07:25.600
like the word surface level because it is still like you can still have like good high quality

1108
01:07:27.120 --> 01:07:34.480
conversation you're just not getting into the x files and the drama and the trauma and the you

1109
01:07:34.480 --> 01:07:40.320
know you're not going to like oh yeah like because my big thing was again i was a single mom so it

1110
01:07:40.320 --> 01:07:45.520
was like telling everybody my story about how i became a single mom yeah my son's dad left me at

1111
01:07:45.520 --> 01:07:50.960
seven months pregnant and you know we had a toxic relationship and he said this to me and all that

1112
01:07:50.960 --> 01:07:58.720
like no we don't want to go down that territory we just like yeah i i have a kid um i'm a single

1113
01:07:58.720 --> 01:08:05.920
parent like he goes to his dad's you know every other weekend and and left it very just you know

1114
01:08:05.920 --> 01:08:10.800
and i didn't even give a lot of information even about my kid because again complete stranger i'm

1115
01:08:10.800 --> 01:08:16.960
not gonna i'm not gonna overshare to a complete stranger so it really is just it's okay to take

1116
01:08:16.960 --> 01:08:22.479
time to get to know somebody you don't have to go those deep dive conversations so hopefully and

1117
01:08:22.479 --> 01:08:28.960
again like i said those questions using those questions and i hope that you know what maybe

1118
01:08:28.960 --> 01:08:34.960
what we should do is if you had a good question or someone shared a good question let's go share it in

1119
01:08:34.960 --> 01:08:41.680
the app and let's start just putting those out there and we can talk about how we can turn those

1120
01:08:41.680 --> 01:08:49.680
into conversations so it doesn't have to be like so what do you like to do on the weekend um i

1121
01:08:51.279 --> 01:09:01.040
go to church like or oh i go out to eat okay like let's let's make conversation out of it so oh you

1122
01:09:01.120 --> 01:09:05.840
like football who's your favorite team like have you been to any games what was your favorite game

1123
01:09:05.840 --> 01:09:12.560
like you know start building a conversation relate it to yourself maybe if it's not oh well i you

1124
01:09:12.560 --> 01:09:19.439
know i've never been interested in football but um you know i have a brother that was a baseball

1125
01:09:19.439 --> 01:09:23.120
player and i remember going to his baseball games have you ever thought about you know do you ever

1126
01:09:23.120 --> 01:09:26.880
watch baseball do you have a favorite baseball team do you see how you can kind of flip and turn

1127
01:09:26.880 --> 01:09:37.680
it and make it conversation does any of that help it does it's still for me i mean it's it's

1128
01:09:37.680 --> 01:09:44.640
such a wide range for me it still feels superficial in a way i think i have a way to go there and also

1129
01:09:45.840 --> 01:09:51.520
well practice it could just take practice going out there and putting it into practice and

1130
01:09:51.520 --> 01:09:55.760
because if it's not something that you're used to doing there's going to maybe be a little bit

1131
01:09:55.760 --> 01:09:59.840
uncomfortableness with it and so it's just practice it and and

1132
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:04.240
wait for it to be more comfortable for you.

1133
01:10:05.400 --> 01:10:08.120
You got anything else?

1134
01:10:08.120 --> 01:10:16.040
Well, yeah. Because I've had this first date this week.

1135
01:10:16.040 --> 01:10:19.080
My tendency is that,

1136
01:10:19.080 --> 01:10:21.600
I mean, it was just a half hour phone conversation,

1137
01:10:21.600 --> 01:10:22.680
but I felt like, okay,

1138
01:10:22.680 --> 01:10:24.120
this is not my spirit mate.

1139
01:10:24.120 --> 01:10:26.160
He wasn't dangerous or anything,

1140
01:10:26.160 --> 01:10:27.400
and he would like to do it again.

1141
01:10:27.400 --> 01:10:29.600
I'm thinking, sure, we can talk again.

1142
01:10:29.600 --> 01:10:30.960
Maybe it's good for practice,

1143
01:10:30.960 --> 01:10:33.160
but I know he's not the one.

1144
01:10:33.160 --> 01:10:35.960
I already have that in my mind and I'm like,

1145
01:10:35.960 --> 01:10:39.680
why would I want to lead him on or how do I get out of

1146
01:10:39.680 --> 01:10:44.160
this later on if I talk to him?

1147
01:10:44.160 --> 01:10:47.120
That's a good question. I like that you're like,

1148
01:10:47.120 --> 01:10:49.360
how do I get out of this later on?

1149
01:10:49.360 --> 01:10:52.320
Again, you're not fully invested in this.

1150
01:10:52.320 --> 01:10:53.600
You've gone on one date.

1151
01:10:53.600 --> 01:10:57.080
If you decide to go on another two or three dates,

1152
01:10:57.080 --> 01:10:59.200
after that, it's really simple.

1153
01:10:59.200 --> 01:11:01.720
You can say, look, I really do

1154
01:11:01.720 --> 01:11:05.760
appreciate you spending time with me and getting to know me.

1155
01:11:05.760 --> 01:11:08.320
We've spent a few dates together.

1156
01:11:08.320 --> 01:11:10.640
I don't see this going anywhere romantic,

1157
01:11:10.640 --> 01:11:14.200
so I appreciate your time and I wish you the best of luck.

1158
01:11:14.200 --> 01:11:15.920
You can still get out of it.

1159
01:11:15.920 --> 01:11:17.480
It's all about communication.

1160
01:11:17.480 --> 01:11:20.440
You're not leading anybody on.

1161
01:11:20.440 --> 01:11:26.000
It becomes leading on when you ladies are kissing,

1162
01:11:26.040 --> 01:11:33.120
hugging, really throwing the flirt on real heavy.

1163
01:11:33.120 --> 01:11:35.920
If you're being seductive,

1164
01:11:35.920 --> 01:11:38.960
that's where it's like if you're being tempting and then you're like,

1165
01:11:38.960 --> 01:11:40.760
oh, okay, I'm done.

1166
01:11:40.760 --> 01:11:42.720
That to me is,

1167
01:11:42.720 --> 01:11:45.000
that's when you're leading somebody on.

1168
01:11:45.000 --> 01:11:48.040
You're trying to get something from somebody,

1169
01:11:48.040 --> 01:11:49.720
and then once you get what you have,

1170
01:11:49.720 --> 01:11:51.240
you're like, okay, bye.

1171
01:11:51.240 --> 01:11:54.600
You're not doing that. You're in practice.

1172
01:11:54.640 --> 01:11:56.080
You're getting to know someone.

1173
01:11:56.080 --> 01:11:57.960
You're invested in that.

1174
01:11:57.960 --> 01:11:59.280
After a couple of dates,

1175
01:11:59.280 --> 01:12:02.880
you're not kissing and making out and doing all those things.

1176
01:12:02.880 --> 01:12:05.840
You're just spending time with somebody.

1177
01:12:05.840 --> 01:12:09.240
After a second or third date,

1178
01:12:09.240 --> 01:12:13.600
and if you're like, I'm not sure I see this going anywhere romantic.

1179
01:12:13.600 --> 01:12:15.600
I appreciate the time that we've spent.

1180
01:12:15.600 --> 01:12:17.640
I wish you the best of luck.

1181
01:12:17.640 --> 01:12:21.040
That's how you can end it.

1182
01:12:21.040 --> 01:12:26.320
Now, I will say there has been many women on our community

1183
01:12:26.320 --> 01:12:33.840
where they met their husband and at first they were not attracted to them at all.

1184
01:12:33.840 --> 01:12:37.720
They were like, yeah, I don't know if I can do this.

1185
01:12:37.720 --> 01:12:41.520
But they gave it time to get to know them,

1186
01:12:41.520 --> 01:12:45.160
and then they realized that they were compatible in certain things and there

1187
01:12:45.160 --> 01:12:49.120
were good things that they really liked about the person, like their husband.

1188
01:12:49.160 --> 01:12:52.000
That started drawing the attraction out.

1189
01:12:52.000 --> 01:12:54.320
That's why we do encourage,

1190
01:12:54.320 --> 01:12:58.840
don't just shut the door on a first date,

1191
01:12:58.840 --> 01:13:00.840
but give it a couple,

1192
01:13:00.840 --> 01:13:03.040
especially if you didn't have a horrible time.

1193
01:13:03.040 --> 01:13:10.640
We're not saying go out with a guy that's disrespectful and rude a third time,

1194
01:13:10.640 --> 01:13:12.200
a second or third time.

1195
01:13:12.200 --> 01:13:16.240
But if it was an okay time,

1196
01:13:16.240 --> 01:13:18.600
then go have another date.

1197
01:13:18.600 --> 01:13:23.080
You might learn something new about them, about yourself.

1198
01:13:23.080 --> 01:13:25.200
It's always helpful.

1199
01:13:25.200 --> 01:13:28.120
But there is a way of getting out and it's, again,

1200
01:13:28.120 --> 01:13:30.760
just reminding like you're not leading anybody on.

1201
01:13:30.760 --> 01:13:32.680
It's not like you're saying,

1202
01:13:32.680 --> 01:13:36.280
oh, look, I'm going to give this to you and then bye.

1203
01:13:36.280 --> 01:13:37.880
No, we're not doing that.

1204
01:13:37.880 --> 01:13:42.120
That's why we encourage no physical contact of that kind.

1205
01:13:42.280 --> 01:13:46.800
We're not swapping saliva with several different men.

1206
01:13:46.800 --> 01:13:53.240
We wait to kiss somebody when we are in an exclusive relationship.

1207
01:13:53.320 --> 01:13:55.840
We set those boundaries.

1208
01:13:55.840 --> 01:14:00.920
I'll tell you, you'll learn about a man when you start putting some of those boundaries down.

1209
01:14:00.920 --> 01:14:06.400
You will find out real quick whether or not you need to end it or not.

1210
01:14:09.440 --> 01:14:11.760
I see two more hands.

1211
01:14:11.800 --> 01:14:15.240
I want to go back. I just don't want to miss anything anybody said in the chat.

1212
01:14:15.240 --> 01:14:17.200
Yes, Alexis.

1213
01:14:17.200 --> 01:14:19.800
I always spend less money when I don't have my kids with me either,

1214
01:14:19.800 --> 01:14:24.200
because I usually go off my list and I'm not having the kids tell me,

1215
01:14:24.200 --> 01:14:26.640
oh, can we get this? Can we get this?

1216
01:14:27.160 --> 01:14:31.760
Nicole, also something important you said was have fun.

1217
01:14:31.760 --> 01:14:35.440
You found that you were so serious and men wanted to have a good time.

1218
01:14:35.440 --> 01:14:37.280
We are all so fun in our own ways,

1219
01:14:37.280 --> 01:14:40.040
but guys want and need to see that.

1220
01:14:40.040 --> 01:14:44.400
Not taking things too serious, because that comes through during dates.

1221
01:14:44.400 --> 01:14:48.960
Yes, because again, especially in the beginning, just go out and have fun.

1222
01:14:48.960 --> 01:14:54.640
There's so much time for the seriousness when you all have your exclusive relationships.

1223
01:14:54.640 --> 01:14:56.760
Okay, Teresa, she shared some of those questions.

1224
01:14:56.760 --> 01:15:00.760
What travel experiences and vacations do you have?

1225
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:03.880
Vacations. Have you enjoyed that's my favorite question because I love to travel. I

1226
01:15:04.640 --> 01:15:06.480
Love seeing new places

1227
01:15:06.480 --> 01:15:11.960
There are certain places that I've been to that I just would go back to so you can have

1228
01:15:12.360 --> 01:15:15.120
That in itself if you are a travel person

1229
01:15:15.440 --> 01:15:22.700
You can have a lot of conversations and talk about your past travel experiences and some of the fun times that you've had

1230
01:15:22.840 --> 01:15:25.280
And you see how you don't have to be so surface level

1231
01:15:25.280 --> 01:15:30.040
But you can share a little bit of peace about you and then you can also show like oh

1232
01:15:30.640 --> 01:15:35.800
Like what you enjoy because of things that you've done on vacations or you know

1233
01:15:35.800 --> 01:15:39.320
What they would enjoy and does that match up like if you're a travel person?

1234
01:15:39.320 --> 01:15:46.120
You're gonna want to make sure that you're probably have some compatibility in wanting to travel with them as well

1235
01:15:46.120 --> 01:15:50.800
that was one of the first conversations that my husband and I had on our first date is

1236
01:15:51.480 --> 01:15:53.480
We are both wine drinkers

1237
01:15:54.200 --> 01:16:00.680
He is more bougie with his wine drinking than I am like I thought I was like pretty you know

1238
01:16:01.440 --> 01:16:07.760
Seasoned because I was in the restaurant business. So I was all like I liked to learn about wine

1239
01:16:07.760 --> 01:16:09.960
Oh, he took the cake on that one

1240
01:16:09.960 --> 01:16:12.720
And so we talked about red wine and he's like, you know

1241
01:16:12.720 --> 01:16:17.340
Some of his favorite red wines are out of Napa and I'm like, oh have you ever been to Napa?

1242
01:16:17.400 --> 01:16:19.960
He's like no, but I want to go and I'm like, I want to go

1243
01:16:19.960 --> 01:16:26.320
I've never been and that's all my bucket list. And so we talked about that. And then when we started dating we were like

1244
01:16:26.840 --> 01:16:31.760
Let's plan a trip and I honestly thought we were gonna plan a trip and that was where I was gonna get proposed to

1245
01:16:32.160 --> 01:16:37.000
Well, we never ended up taking that Napa trip until our one-year anniversary

1246
01:16:37.000 --> 01:16:40.080
I even thought we would do that for our honeymoon and that didn't happen

1247
01:16:40.320 --> 01:16:44.640
So it was important like having those conversations like you learn

1248
01:16:45.160 --> 01:16:50.400
Like is this like someone I want to do life with can they travel with me?

1249
01:16:50.400 --> 01:16:55.320
Do they want to travel that was important for me. So I love I love that question

1250
01:16:55.960 --> 01:16:59.960
Favorite memory favorite dreams are what is your dream job?

1251
01:17:00.720 --> 01:17:04.480
So yeah, I love those. Those are good questions. So ladies write those down

1252
01:17:05.040 --> 01:17:07.960
You put those in your put those in your back pocket. Okay

1253
01:17:08.840 --> 01:17:13.360
All right, Nicole had to leave awesome. I think I think she's already left. So

1254
01:17:14.880 --> 01:17:22.200
Kylie and then Nicole the other Nicole. Let's take your questions Kylie. I see your hand first and then I'll jump to Nicole

1255
01:17:22.960 --> 01:17:25.960
Mine wasn't really a question. I was just gonna say, um, I

1256
01:17:26.600 --> 01:17:33.680
Actually posted on the chat for a list of questions. I like that you should ask or like good ideas to ask on date

1257
01:17:33.680 --> 01:17:39.880
So if everyone wants to comment on that, that would be like really awesome in in the chat here and our thing

1258
01:17:40.400 --> 01:17:47.360
In the last year single so ebony wrote like a whole bunch of prompts below that and I think one other person commented

1259
01:17:47.360 --> 01:17:50.720
I can't remember but there's ideas there. I don't know

1260
01:17:52.040 --> 01:17:56.120
Like I can't yeah, I'm I'm gonna start learning. I'm gonna start

1261
01:17:56.840 --> 01:18:02.120
Putting down a list of things and see if like once we get some of the glitches if there's other things that we can

1262
01:18:02.120 --> 01:18:07.980
Add for the developers to add to our app to make it a little bit more user-friendly in that nature

1263
01:18:08.060 --> 01:18:10.860
But yeah, I mean for now just scroll down and

1264
01:18:11.460 --> 01:18:18.620
And add to it and then that way you can you know, and I wonder you know, we might even I'll talk to Bethany

1265
01:18:18.620 --> 01:18:22.620
Maybe I could even pin the post so it's at the top

1266
01:18:22.980 --> 01:18:26.420
so a lot of times like things that Jackie myself and

1267
01:18:27.100 --> 01:18:32.180
Bethany have shared and ebony have shared that those will be at the top in their pin post

1268
01:18:32.180 --> 01:18:39.420
So maybe we can look into doing that as well and putting a pin post in there for you ladies to like grab those questions

1269
01:18:39.820 --> 01:18:43.060
So Kylie, thank you so much for reminding us that you did that

1270
01:18:43.060 --> 01:18:45.220
So for now ladies go search for that

1271
01:18:45.620 --> 01:18:50.540
Because like she said people put stuff under them and then let's just keep adding to it

1272
01:18:50.540 --> 01:18:54.640
And then we can pull that off and then we can create another

1273
01:18:55.340 --> 01:18:57.340
post and pin it and

1274
01:18:57.340 --> 01:19:00.940
then just continue to keep adding it and we could just update it as as

1275
01:19:02.340 --> 01:19:04.180
the weeks progress

1276
01:19:04.180 --> 01:19:06.180
Sound good

1277
01:19:06.540 --> 01:19:08.540
All right, Nicole you had your hand up

1278
01:19:10.620 --> 01:19:12.620
How are you

1279
01:19:14.820 --> 01:19:16.820
I think you're the only Nicole in the room now

1280
01:19:18.460 --> 01:19:24.340
Thanks, no, I was reflecting on what he said earlier and just just wanted to add a comment to that

1281
01:19:25.700 --> 01:19:27.820
When I first became widowed

1282
01:19:28.820 --> 01:19:30.740
It's different than your scenario

1283
01:19:30.740 --> 01:19:35.340
I recognize but I remember getting feedback from my friends saying if you when you're ready

1284
01:19:35.540 --> 01:19:38.100
you need to put yourself out there and

1285
01:19:38.700 --> 01:19:44.300
And show an attitude of readiness, you know, and so when you were saying Sigi about

1286
01:19:44.860 --> 01:19:47.500
You knew right away. It wasn't your spirit mate

1287
01:19:48.900 --> 01:19:51.740
I'm having a struggle with knowing who my you know

1288
01:19:51.740 --> 01:19:55.820
The spirit mate thing because that's the stakes are extremely high when it gets to that point

1289
01:19:55.820 --> 01:20:00.220
So I'm blending what somebody told me and say just go with the flow

1290
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:00.920
flow for a little bit.

1291
01:20:00.920 --> 01:20:03.120
And that might be counterintuitive to you.

1292
01:20:03.120 --> 01:20:06.800
And from my experience and from that, those days

1293
01:20:06.800 --> 01:20:09.320
and it's three years ago till now,

1294
01:20:09.320 --> 01:20:10.680
it's a whole different ball game.

1295
01:20:10.680 --> 01:20:14.320
You know, I can learn how to be flirty with somebody

1296
01:20:14.320 --> 01:20:16.120
but not like leading them on.

1297
01:20:16.120 --> 01:20:20.540
And I love what you said, I can't remember your name.

1298
01:20:25.640 --> 01:20:26.920
Oh, you're muted.

1299
01:20:26.920 --> 01:20:27.760
Arla.

1300
01:20:30.560 --> 01:20:33.720
Arla, I love what you said right before we took our break

1301
01:20:33.720 --> 01:20:38.600
about go to Home Depot or someplace where men are

1302
01:20:38.600 --> 01:20:42.120
and practice letting them help you.

1303
01:20:42.120 --> 01:20:46.120
And I was like, OMG, goodness.

1304
01:20:46.120 --> 01:20:48.800
Because it was like, that was revolutionary for me

1305
01:20:48.800 --> 01:20:51.520
because I still get my back up if somebody asked me,

1306
01:20:51.520 --> 01:20:54.160
you know, because I don't want to appear or be vulnerable

1307
01:20:54.160 --> 01:20:57.720
but it's also nice to learn how to receive.

1308
01:20:57.720 --> 01:21:01.240
And so what I say to Siggy is there's a lot

1309
01:21:01.240 --> 01:21:04.960
of soft space that we have to get ourselves to

1310
01:21:04.960 --> 01:21:06.240
before we can start saying,

1311
01:21:06.240 --> 01:21:08.400
yes, this person might be my spirit mate,

1312
01:21:08.400 --> 01:21:12.680
you know, from the first section, first time you meet.

1313
01:21:12.680 --> 01:21:15.280
So that's what I've taken that on board.

1314
01:21:15.280 --> 01:21:16.720
And I thought that might be something of interest

1315
01:21:16.720 --> 01:21:18.680
for you to think about as well

1316
01:21:18.680 --> 01:21:20.480
because it's really helped me

1317
01:21:20.480 --> 01:21:22.400
because I'm trying to just take baby steps now

1318
01:21:22.400 --> 01:21:24.720
because when you get to spirit mate,

1319
01:21:24.720 --> 01:21:27.400
the stakes are really high at that point.

1320
01:21:28.080 --> 01:21:30.000
And so you want to be really as ready,

1321
01:21:30.000 --> 01:21:33.440
your heart work is done, you're ready to receive or not,

1322
01:21:33.440 --> 01:21:35.680
you know, but you're calm about it.

1323
01:21:35.680 --> 01:21:37.440
So that's, that was what came up to me

1324
01:21:37.440 --> 01:21:39.440
in my spirit as I was listening to you.

1325
01:21:41.040 --> 01:21:41.880
I love that.

1326
01:21:41.880 --> 01:21:42.720
I love that.

1327
01:21:42.720 --> 01:21:43.680
Thank you so much for sharing that.

1328
01:21:43.680 --> 01:21:45.680
And like she said, like, yeah, like

1329
01:21:45.680 --> 01:21:48.360
we just want to be our best selves.

1330
01:21:48.360 --> 01:21:51.120
So it's just, sometimes it doesn't have to be a rush.

1331
01:21:51.120 --> 01:21:52.800
You don't have to like rush through it.

1332
01:21:52.800 --> 01:21:55.560
Just take the time, you know,

1333
01:21:55.640 --> 01:21:59.120
sometimes it is just taking those baby steps, you know,

1334
01:21:59.120 --> 01:22:02.080
and yeah, like do the heartwork that you can

1335
01:22:02.080 --> 01:22:05.120
because again, you're going to meet your spirit mate

1336
01:22:05.120 --> 01:22:06.320
and you're going to get invested

1337
01:22:06.320 --> 01:22:07.880
and there's going to be more things

1338
01:22:07.880 --> 01:22:08.960
that are going to get uncovered.

1339
01:22:08.960 --> 01:22:12.000
I always say like heartwork is never done.

1340
01:22:12.000 --> 01:22:14.320
There's going to be new things, new avenues,

1341
01:22:14.320 --> 01:22:16.160
like new person, like you're having,

1342
01:22:16.160 --> 01:22:19.920
you're blending two people, like two people become one.

1343
01:22:19.920 --> 01:22:21.440
There's just differences there.

1344
01:22:21.440 --> 01:22:24.080
And so you do, you have to,

1345
01:22:24.080 --> 01:22:25.800
when you show up as your best self

1346
01:22:25.800 --> 01:22:28.800
and you take in the time and the process,

1347
01:22:28.800 --> 01:22:31.320
it really does make that transition a lot easier.

1348
01:22:31.320 --> 01:22:32.320
I will tell you this much.

1349
01:22:32.320 --> 01:22:34.080
Like if I didn't work through

1350
01:22:34.080 --> 01:22:36.640
and do the things that I did in this program,

1351
01:22:36.640 --> 01:22:39.840
when I met my husband, I would have cut and run.

1352
01:22:39.840 --> 01:22:43.920
I mean, Jackie, in fact, Jackie had to tell me,

1353
01:22:45.360 --> 01:22:48.360
get off the ledge, stop trying to sabotage this

1354
01:22:48.360 --> 01:22:52.200
before you even met the person, like met this guy in person.

1355
01:22:52.200 --> 01:22:54.360
She's like, stop overthinking it.

1356
01:22:54.360 --> 01:22:57.240
Just go out and have fun and enjoy yourself.

1357
01:22:57.240 --> 01:23:00.520
And I was like, that was so hard for me.

1358
01:23:00.520 --> 01:23:03.360
I was like, but I just, like, I don't want to waste my time.

1359
01:23:03.360 --> 01:23:05.480
And so she's like, just go have fun.

1360
01:23:05.480 --> 01:23:10.360
So it is, and if I didn't like do the work

1361
01:23:10.360 --> 01:23:11.720
and I didn't take the advice,

1362
01:23:11.720 --> 01:23:14.600
like I would have cut and run so quick.

1363
01:23:14.600 --> 01:23:15.920
I mean, and I used to be like,

1364
01:23:15.920 --> 01:23:17.480
why do I have to wait so long?

1365
01:23:17.480 --> 01:23:20.320
Because some of you, like, you're like ready to go.

1366
01:23:20.320 --> 01:23:21.880
Like you want to meet him now?

1367
01:23:22.560 --> 01:23:23.760
Like, let's do it, right?

1368
01:23:23.760 --> 01:23:25.200
I was the same way.

1369
01:23:25.200 --> 01:23:27.680
And then I was like, but he's not coming.

1370
01:23:27.680 --> 01:23:28.880
Like, why isn't he?

1371
01:23:28.880 --> 01:23:30.400
I'm doing the work, I'm fine.

1372
01:23:30.400 --> 01:23:32.800
Like, why is everybody else getting their love story,

1373
01:23:32.800 --> 01:23:34.440
not me?

1374
01:23:34.440 --> 01:23:38.600
And I had to learn that like, it really,

1375
01:23:38.600 --> 01:23:42.560
it was God had to work on me

1376
01:23:42.560 --> 01:23:46.760
and I had to be ready to be able to accept

1377
01:23:46.760 --> 01:23:48.640
who he had for me.

1378
01:23:48.640 --> 01:23:52.560
Because one of my big things was I was very stubborn

1379
01:23:52.560 --> 01:23:54.160
because I was like, I'm not moving.

1380
01:23:54.160 --> 01:23:55.680
I'm not leaving Florida.

1381
01:23:56.640 --> 01:24:00.480
My husband was in Texas and I'm living in Texas now.

1382
01:24:00.480 --> 01:24:02.080
Like I was not ready.

1383
01:24:02.080 --> 01:24:04.840
If I would have met him and I've been like, boy, bye.

1384
01:24:04.840 --> 01:24:09.840
Like, so it is, it's a process like work.

1385
01:24:10.480 --> 01:24:14.280
Don't stress on the, is this my spirit mate?

1386
01:24:14.280 --> 01:24:15.560
Is this not?

1387
01:24:15.560 --> 01:24:19.720
It's just allow, give yourself time.

1388
01:24:19.720 --> 01:24:21.200
And it's totally okay.

1389
01:24:22.320 --> 01:24:27.320
I love what Nicole said that there's a lot of learning

1390
01:24:27.960 --> 01:24:29.000
that can take place.

1391
01:24:29.000 --> 01:24:31.120
And when you step into that spirit mate,

1392
01:24:31.120 --> 01:24:33.960
like you wanna be healed,

1393
01:24:33.960 --> 01:24:35.920
you wanna be ready to receive it.

1394
01:24:37.840 --> 01:24:38.920
Good, good stuff.

1395
01:24:40.560 --> 01:24:42.040
All right, anybody else?

1396
01:24:42.880 --> 01:24:43.720
We good?

1397
01:24:45.040 --> 01:24:48.480
I do have one question about masculinity

1398
01:24:48.480 --> 01:24:50.400
because we talk about like femininity.

1399
01:24:50.400 --> 01:24:53.480
Is there something, I did watch the video,

1400
01:24:53.480 --> 01:24:55.160
but is there like somewhere where it's written

1401
01:24:55.160 --> 01:24:58.400
like masculine traits that we should be looking for?

1402
01:24:59.600 --> 01:25:01.040
I don't really know.

1403
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:04.280
for in men besides like marriage minded and yeah.

1404
01:25:01.040 --> 01:25:01.960
It's like, I don't know.

1405
01:25:01.960 --> 01:25:03.320
I don't know.

1406
01:25:03.320 --> 01:25:04.280
I'm just curious.

1407
01:25:04.280 --> 01:25:05.720
Like, I'm not sure.

1408
01:25:04.280 --> 01:25:06.600
And I'm glad you said that,

1409
01:25:05.720 --> 01:25:06.560
Like, I don't know.

1410
01:25:06.560 --> 01:25:07.400
I don't know.

1411
01:25:06.600 --> 01:25:10.000
cause I know somewhere I have some of this written down,

1412
01:25:07.400 --> 01:25:08.240
I don't know.

1413
01:25:08.240 --> 01:25:09.080
I don't know.

1414
01:25:09.080 --> 01:25:09.920
I don't know.

1415
01:25:09.920 --> 01:25:10.760
I don't know.

1416
01:25:10.000 --> 01:25:14.360
but yes, there, we talk about the three M's,

1417
01:25:14.360 --> 01:25:15.600
we talk about the three M's,

1418
01:25:15.600 --> 01:25:17.720
about them being marriage minded,

1419
01:25:17.720 --> 01:25:22.280
about them being mature and about them being masculine.

1420
01:25:22.280 --> 01:25:27.280
If you, I can look into, I'm not fine,

1421
01:25:27.280 --> 01:25:31.320
cause I was interested in that too,

1422
01:25:31.320 --> 01:25:33.400
cause we talk about the divine feminine,

1423
01:25:33.400 --> 01:25:35.680
but we're like, okay, we're looking for the three M's

1424
01:25:35.680 --> 01:25:38.600
and one of those masculine, what's that mean?

1425
01:25:38.600 --> 01:25:41.040
So I did have it written down.

1426
01:25:41.040 --> 01:25:44.600
I know a few off the top of my head.

1427
01:25:44.600 --> 01:25:48.000
One of them is obviously like couple provider protector,

1428
01:25:49.840 --> 01:25:51.760
the masculine is identity giver.

1429
01:25:52.880 --> 01:25:54.200
So if you think about like,

1430
01:25:54.200 --> 01:25:56.720
if you think about just even the chromosomes, right?

1431
01:25:56.760 --> 01:25:58.120
Like when babies are made,

1432
01:26:00.040 --> 01:26:04.640
man is the DNA that determines the sex of the baby,

1433
01:26:04.640 --> 01:26:06.760
determines whether or not it's a boy or girl.

1434
01:26:06.760 --> 01:26:09.920
So divine masculine is identity giver.

1435
01:26:09.920 --> 01:26:14.760
So men have the ability to speak identity into people.

1436
01:26:15.720 --> 01:26:19.680
So what this relates to for me,

1437
01:26:19.680 --> 01:26:21.520
like ways that it's come up in my life.

1438
01:26:21.520 --> 01:26:24.080
So for example, my son's father,

1439
01:26:24.120 --> 01:26:28.560
now I've gone through a lot of healing here.

1440
01:26:28.560 --> 01:26:31.320
I can appreciate my son's father

1441
01:26:31.320 --> 01:26:33.080
for the fact that he's the one

1442
01:26:33.080 --> 01:26:35.960
that came up with my son's name.

1443
01:26:35.960 --> 01:26:38.520
My son's name is Bo, his middle name is Garrett.

1444
01:26:38.520 --> 01:26:41.000
So his name is Bo Garrett.

1445
01:26:41.000 --> 01:26:44.920
And when I was looking, what does that name mean?

1446
01:26:44.920 --> 01:26:47.640
Cause I'm into like meanings of names and stuff

1447
01:26:47.640 --> 01:26:49.280
and it being prophetic,

1448
01:26:49.280 --> 01:26:52.800
it was beautiful warrior, beautiful defender.

1449
01:26:52.800 --> 01:26:55.000
And so I remember thinking to myself

1450
01:26:55.000 --> 01:26:56.840
and praying like, yes, Lord,

1451
01:26:56.840 --> 01:27:01.360
I want my son to be a beautiful defender for God's kingdom.

1452
01:27:01.360 --> 01:27:04.600
Lord, I believe that that's what you have called him to be.

1453
01:27:04.600 --> 01:27:06.480
And he's going to step into that.

1454
01:27:06.480 --> 01:27:07.800
That's going to be his identity.

1455
01:27:07.800 --> 01:27:10.720
And I realized to me that his father

1456
01:27:10.720 --> 01:27:12.480
is the one that gave him the name

1457
01:27:12.480 --> 01:27:14.120
and spoke that identity into him.

1458
01:27:14.120 --> 01:27:16.760
Now, his dad is not a huge believer, right?

1459
01:27:16.760 --> 01:27:19.760
He gave me the fluff that he was a Christian,

1460
01:27:19.760 --> 01:27:22.760
but he does not have a strong relationship with the Lord.

1461
01:27:23.200 --> 01:27:26.120
But that doesn't mean that he couldn't give identity.

1462
01:27:26.120 --> 01:27:30.640
And now even my husband, who's taking on that father role,

1463
01:27:31.600 --> 01:27:36.200
he does a beautiful job of speaking identity into our kids

1464
01:27:36.200 --> 01:27:37.240
of what they are.

1465
01:27:37.240 --> 01:27:39.400
Now, it doesn't mean that I don't speak those things

1466
01:27:39.400 --> 01:27:41.720
in my kids, like God has shown me

1467
01:27:41.720 --> 01:27:44.800
of like certain things about all of our kids.

1468
01:27:44.800 --> 01:27:46.600
Like my daughter,

1469
01:27:46.600 --> 01:27:49.440
I believe that she's going to be a strong influencer.

1470
01:27:50.240 --> 01:27:54.440
And I see that because I also see how the enemy

1471
01:27:54.440 --> 01:27:59.080
is trying to take the worldly influence and shift her.

1472
01:27:59.080 --> 01:28:02.680
And she's easily influenced by some of the wrong things.

1473
01:28:02.680 --> 01:28:05.000
And so I'm constantly speaking into her,

1474
01:28:05.000 --> 01:28:08.200
like we got to combat the influences of the world

1475
01:28:08.200 --> 01:28:11.880
and influence of people that we don't want

1476
01:28:11.880 --> 01:28:16.720
and remember who God says you are and whose you are.

1477
01:28:16.720 --> 01:28:18.760
And so, because you are going to influence other

1478
01:28:18.760 --> 01:28:19.680
for that same thing.

1479
01:28:19.680 --> 01:28:22.040
So it doesn't mean that we can't speak the identity,

1480
01:28:22.040 --> 01:28:25.720
but the masculine does have that trait.

1481
01:28:25.720 --> 01:28:27.920
Again, so provider, protector,

1482
01:28:29.600 --> 01:28:32.880
those are the ones that come off the top of my head,

1483
01:28:32.880 --> 01:28:37.120
but I will make note to see if we can't find like a way

1484
01:28:37.120 --> 01:28:40.880
to maybe get a document up in the near future

1485
01:28:40.880 --> 01:28:42.600
of being able to do that.

1486
01:28:42.600 --> 01:28:47.360
But if you go back into the Divine Feminine video,

1487
01:28:49.120 --> 01:28:50.640
because I'd stop and pause.

1488
01:28:50.640 --> 01:28:53.920
She doesn't talk about it a really long time,

1489
01:28:53.920 --> 01:28:56.560
but there are times that she does talk

1490
01:28:56.560 --> 01:28:57.760
a little bit about it.

1491
01:29:00.000 --> 01:29:01.440
But I think those are good questions

1492
01:29:01.440 --> 01:29:03.040
because yeah, we want masculine men.

1493
01:29:03.040 --> 01:29:06.520
Like, do they have, are they mature?

1494
01:29:06.520 --> 01:29:08.160
Do they have their stuff in check?

1495
01:29:08.160 --> 01:29:13.160
Like, are they getting wise counsel from other people,

1496
01:29:13.880 --> 01:29:15.280
other men?

1497
01:29:15.280 --> 01:29:16.960
Are they surrounding themselves with people

1498
01:29:16.960 --> 01:29:20.000
who are gonna hold them accountable spiritually,

1499
01:29:20.000 --> 01:29:23.120
emotionally, and things of that nature?

1500
01:29:24.200 --> 01:29:25.640
So hopefully that kind of helps a little bit,

1501
01:29:25.640 --> 01:29:30.160
but I will make note of that and see if I can't figure out

1502
01:29:31.840 --> 01:29:34.680
what we can do for finding like a document of sorts,

1503
01:29:34.680 --> 01:29:39.040
or maybe in the next time we do Divine Feminine

1504
01:29:39.040 --> 01:29:42.320
in four weeks, we can discuss a little bit

1505
01:29:42.320 --> 01:29:44.160
about the masculine as well.

1506
01:29:44.160 --> 01:29:46.040
And I do know that there is a document

1507
01:29:46.040 --> 01:29:47.560
and I can look into that as well

1508
01:29:47.560 --> 01:29:49.920
about what the three Ms look like.

1509
01:29:49.920 --> 01:29:51.720
So we go in a little bit more detail.

1510
01:29:51.720 --> 01:29:55.880
And again, if you are, if any of you have social media,

1511
01:29:55.880 --> 01:29:59.840
like not just Facebook, but Instagram and follow Jackie.

1512
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:08.720
On that, I do know that she has several posts from the years previous about things like that.

1513
01:30:08.720 --> 01:30:13.360
So sometimes you can go search through her stories and stuff, I think, on Instagram.

1514
01:30:14.880 --> 01:30:19.920
I'm not a huge Instagram person. I'm not on there often. It takes a lot for me just to be on

1515
01:30:19.920 --> 01:30:25.280
Facebook. But there's those little circular things, like tabs. If you click on some of those,

1516
01:30:25.280 --> 01:30:30.880
you'll see some of her past posts and stuff. And so she has things on that as well.

1517
01:30:31.600 --> 01:30:39.120
So hopefully that helps. But yeah, so what were the masculine traits again? So

1518
01:30:39.120 --> 01:30:43.120
the ones that came to mind are like provider, protector, their identity giver.

1519
01:30:45.120 --> 01:30:50.000
Those are the top three that come to my mind. I'm drawing a blank on some of the other ones,

1520
01:30:50.000 --> 01:30:55.680
but I know that there were more. But those are the top three. But then we also talk about

1521
01:30:55.680 --> 01:30:59.680
ladies looking for the men with the three M's. That means they're marriage minded,

1522
01:31:00.320 --> 01:31:07.280
they're mature, and they're masculine, divine masculine. All right. I know sometimes people

1523
01:31:07.280 --> 01:31:11.440
are like, Oh, I just don't think he's very masculine, because they think he's got like,

1524
01:31:12.240 --> 01:31:16.400
he's, you know, shorter or smaller, like whatever. And it's like, well, let's like,

1525
01:31:16.400 --> 01:31:22.560
let's look at what divine masculine really means. So again, it's going back to go back

1526
01:31:22.560 --> 01:31:30.240
to the garden and think about like, who was Adam, like, before the curse, like,

1527
01:31:30.240 --> 01:31:36.640
and then after the feminine came out of him, right from his rib. But she does talk a little

1528
01:31:36.640 --> 01:31:42.880
bit about that and the divine feminine. I will say, ladies, I always say, rewatch those videos

1529
01:31:42.880 --> 01:31:50.880
a couple times. You'll get new information every time you watch them. I still watch them

1530
01:31:50.880 --> 01:31:55.680
and get new information that helps me in the season of life that I'm in. Okay.

1531
01:31:57.680 --> 01:32:01.600
Do we like keep hopping on these calls after we're done all five videos?

1532
01:32:01.600 --> 01:32:08.240
Or so this is, so we're not going to have you stay here for super long. Okay. All right. This

1533
01:32:08.400 --> 01:32:14.480
is like, okay. Four to five weeks watching the videos. Now, some of you are not like

1534
01:32:14.480 --> 01:32:19.840
going to watch all the videos in four to five weeks. Life happens. Some of y'all busy girls,

1535
01:32:19.840 --> 01:32:26.320
you know, moms going to school, have your own businesses work, you know, long hours and stuff.

1536
01:32:26.320 --> 01:32:31.600
So we get that you might be here longer than four or five weeks. But once you get through the

1537
01:32:31.600 --> 01:32:37.360
content and you've been there, then yes, after like, we don't mind if you come back like once

1538
01:32:37.360 --> 01:32:44.800
or twice, but once you move over to phase three, there's this type of like zoom calls for phase

1539
01:32:44.800 --> 01:32:49.680
three, it's just going to be larger. There's going to be more people in the community, which again,

1540
01:32:49.680 --> 01:32:55.680
like Jackie will call them love seats. And so that typically happens once a month and every now and

1541
01:32:55.680 --> 01:33:02.000
then like, so last Tuesday was a love seat Tuesday evening, and she'll invite phase two and phase

1542
01:33:02.000 --> 01:33:07.360
three and the men to a love seat. So you'll get a sneak peek of what that looks like. And then

1543
01:33:07.360 --> 01:33:13.760
there's other calls and, and, and video calls and stuff like that in phase three. So video calls

1544
01:33:13.760 --> 01:33:21.440
don't go away after you leave these two, it's just, we do more direct coaching as far as like,

1545
01:33:22.000 --> 01:33:26.640
you all are stepping into dating. So we want to allow this space for you to really get those

1546
01:33:26.640 --> 01:33:33.360
questions answered, where you're in a smaller forum where it's not the bigger community,

1547
01:33:33.920 --> 01:33:40.720
but there's still zoom calls in phase three. And like I said, the love seat are is very similar

1548
01:33:40.720 --> 01:33:45.360
to what we do here at the end of these calls where, you know, you ask your dating questions

1549
01:33:45.360 --> 01:33:51.520
or things that you're maybe struggling with or breakthroughs that you're having or direction

1550
01:33:51.520 --> 01:33:57.040
that you need or extra coaching that you might want some extra insight from Jackie,

1551
01:33:57.040 --> 01:34:05.520
Bethany, or any of the other coaches in phase three. Okay. All right. Anybody else?

1552
01:34:07.680 --> 01:34:14.160
Any last bit? We're kind of coming up to a two hour mark. So I want to be mindful of time because

1553
01:34:14.160 --> 01:34:21.680
we are going to have ladies watching and replay. So yeah. Because you mentioned the replays.

1554
01:34:21.680 --> 01:34:26.400
I'm one of the people that can't watch the replays. It's not working on my devices.

1555
01:34:26.400 --> 01:34:31.520
You mentioned on the cell phones, it works better, but on my Samsung, it doesn't. I have an Android.

1556
01:34:31.520 --> 01:34:37.280
Do you know is iPhone, you have the, you have the updated version. So you have the most updated

1557
01:34:37.280 --> 01:34:47.760
version. Okay. Definitely there is, and I might, I might have to follow up and make sure I'm giving

1558
01:34:47.760 --> 01:34:54.800
the right information. There should be a contact support button in the app that if you click on

1559
01:34:54.800 --> 01:34:59.920
that, you can, it's like a, like a ticket, like a thing that you can share, like, Hey,

1560
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:03.640
I'm having a hard time, replays are not, but it's in your device.

1561
01:35:03.640 --> 01:35:08.280
So if you can go on your device and it's in the tech training app video.

1562
01:35:09.480 --> 01:35:09.760
Yeah.

1563
01:35:10.960 --> 01:35:11.920
Do you have that?

1564
01:35:12.000 --> 01:35:13.080
And you can watch that.

1565
01:35:13.120 --> 01:35:14.720
You just can't watch the replays.

1566
01:35:15.760 --> 01:35:20.280
Um, I can't, yeah, I can't watch the replays, but because it's on the, do you

1567
01:35:20.280 --> 01:35:23.360
guys know, is it working better on iPhones?

1568
01:35:23.640 --> 01:35:24.960
Is it an Android thing?

1569
01:35:25.000 --> 01:35:26.080
I have an iPhone.

1570
01:35:26.080 --> 01:35:31.080
I don't know if it's any better on an iPhone as it is a Android.

1571
01:35:32.520 --> 01:35:36.520
Does anybody, does anybody else have an iPhone and, and, and are they

1572
01:35:36.520 --> 01:35:37.920
having problems watching replays?

1573
01:35:38.320 --> 01:35:42.200
I have the iPhone and I can watch replays on my phone.

1574
01:35:42.600 --> 01:35:44.760
I cannot watch them on my desktop though.

1575
01:35:45.640 --> 01:35:46.840
I can watch them on my phone.

1576
01:35:46.840 --> 01:35:48.200
I haven't tried desktop though.

1577
01:35:48.240 --> 01:35:48.960
I have an iPhone.

1578
01:35:49.440 --> 01:35:50.200
Do you have an iPhone?

1579
01:35:50.200 --> 01:35:53.800
Does anybody have a Droid and is having a hard time watching replays

1580
01:35:53.800 --> 01:35:55.240
on the Droid besides Ziggy?

1581
01:35:56.080 --> 01:36:02.680
Tara, she's got hers usually plays on iPhone.

1582
01:36:02.680 --> 01:36:06.480
So yeah, maybe it, I will make a note of that as well.

1583
01:36:07.320 --> 01:36:08.960
And, um, it helps.

1584
01:36:09.320 --> 01:36:10.360
I have an old iPhone.

1585
01:36:10.400 --> 01:36:12.040
I might try to install it there.

1586
01:36:13.200 --> 01:36:13.600
Okay.

1587
01:36:13.640 --> 01:36:13.840
Yeah.

1588
01:36:13.840 --> 01:36:17.120
Like if you have like an iPad or a tablet or something, maybe try that.

1589
01:36:17.960 --> 01:36:22.600
Um, I'm going to go ahead and make a note so that I can, um, talk

1590
01:36:22.600 --> 01:36:24.040
with the team about that.

1591
01:36:24.920 --> 01:36:26.880
Things that, okay.

1592
01:36:28.040 --> 01:36:28.600
Yeah.

1593
01:36:30.560 --> 01:36:32.360
Cause that's what I was going to encourage you ladies.

1594
01:36:32.360 --> 01:36:33.960
I was going to activate you.

1595
01:36:34.520 --> 01:36:39.160
So if you can't watch the replay, obviously don't worry about this activation.

1596
01:36:39.160 --> 01:36:42.320
I was going to ask you ladies to go in and make sure that you watch the

1597
01:36:42.320 --> 01:36:47.640
supernatural Saturday and Sunday night activation, um, and then post your

1598
01:36:47.640 --> 01:36:53.040
takeaways that what stuck out the most to you, um, after watching the supernatural

1599
01:36:53.600 --> 01:36:55.440
Saturday and a Sunday activation.

1600
01:36:56.560 --> 01:37:01.560
If you can't watch the activation or the supernatural Saturday, I would say even

1601
01:37:01.560 --> 01:37:03.240
go back to supernatural Saturdays.

1602
01:37:03.280 --> 01:37:07.000
If you can, because I think it's going to help a lot of you ladies, especially

1603
01:37:07.000 --> 01:37:10.520
if some of you, like I noticed in the roll call, lots of people are

1604
01:37:10.520 --> 01:37:12.200
coming up with some fear stuff.

1605
01:37:12.480 --> 01:37:16.120
I think that will help if you watch two supernatural Saturdays ago,

1606
01:37:16.360 --> 01:37:18.000
and then even this last weekend.

1607
01:37:18.360 --> 01:37:24.960
But then again, if you cannot watch those yet, put those on your calendar to watch.

1608
01:37:24.960 --> 01:37:33.360
So once you can definitely watch those, um, but your activation, I want you to,

1609
01:37:33.840 --> 01:37:39.400
um, come into the community and share something that you did to

1610
01:37:39.440 --> 01:37:41.160
activate your divine feminine.

1611
01:37:41.800 --> 01:37:43.720
What, what trait did you activate?

1612
01:37:44.280 --> 01:37:47.880
Maybe some of you ladies are going to go to the home Depot or the

1613
01:37:47.880 --> 01:37:49.680
Lowe's or the hardware store.

1614
01:37:49.840 --> 01:37:51.320
You won't get help from a man.

1615
01:37:52.120 --> 01:37:54.040
You don't have a man to open your door.

1616
01:37:54.880 --> 01:37:59.800
Um, or maybe it's just wear a dress, maybe wear some color.

1617
01:37:59.800 --> 01:38:02.960
Maybe if you're like, like me, a lot of times I don't wear a whole lot of color.

1618
01:38:02.960 --> 01:38:09.120
I try to, a lot of my closet is like lots of blues, whites, and blacks.

1619
01:38:09.640 --> 01:38:15.040
Um, I have a hard time, like luckily my son plays for a team that has like red.

1620
01:38:15.040 --> 01:38:16.920
This is his, his travel ball team.

1621
01:38:17.200 --> 01:38:20.120
So I have a lot of like baseball gear that's red shirts.

1622
01:38:20.120 --> 01:38:23.520
So I'm starting to incorporate red into my wardrobe.

1623
01:38:24.120 --> 01:38:28.360
Not the most flattering color for me, but it, it, it, it's color.

1624
01:38:28.840 --> 01:38:34.920
Um, so maybe it's wearing something like with more pop of a color, a dress, go to

1625
01:38:34.960 --> 01:38:37.880
home Depot, ask a man for help.

1626
01:38:37.880 --> 01:38:39.440
Let them open your door.

1627
01:38:40.080 --> 01:38:45.280
Um, ask him for advice and then you're gonna post about that and

1628
01:38:45.280 --> 01:38:46.880
share about your experience there.

1629
01:38:47.480 --> 01:38:48.080
Okay.

1630
01:38:48.560 --> 01:38:51.560
But all right, that's our activation.

1631
01:38:51.560 --> 01:38:53.040
So make sure that you show up.

1632
01:38:53.040 --> 01:38:56.840
Like, again, I said, the best way to get the most out of this

1633
01:38:56.840 --> 01:39:00.720
community is show up and show up.

1634
01:39:01.400 --> 01:39:05.840
You know, in the app on these check-ins, any of the prayer calls that you can get

1635
01:39:05.840 --> 01:39:08.280
to, you will glean so much more.

1636
01:39:08.720 --> 01:39:09.480
All right.

1637
01:39:10.240 --> 01:39:10.480
All right.

1638
01:39:10.480 --> 01:39:14.480
I'm just going to do a quick prayer and then I will send you on your way ladies.

1639
01:39:14.480 --> 01:39:16.200
So Heavenly father, we thank you.

1640
01:39:16.200 --> 01:39:19.800
I just thank you so much for each one of these women that are here with us now

1641
01:39:19.800 --> 01:39:22.520
and that are watching and replay, even those women that were here

1642
01:39:22.520 --> 01:39:24.240
before, but had to leave Lord.

1643
01:39:24.240 --> 01:39:28.960
I just thank you for, for, you know, their divine feminine that, you

1644
01:39:28.960 --> 01:39:35.640
know, you created them to be gifts to humanity and Lord, I just ask that you

1645
01:39:35.640 --> 01:39:42.720
just continue to show them, um, their identity in you and that they can step

1646
01:39:42.720 --> 01:39:46.360
into that divine feminine that, that you've actually called and you've placed

1647
01:39:46.360 --> 01:39:52.520
in them, Lord, Lord, I, I, I pray courage and bravery over many of the women in

1648
01:39:52.520 --> 01:39:57.880
this community that need that courage and strength to face their fears and step

1649
01:39:57.880 --> 01:39:59.640
out of hiding.

1650
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:06.160
Lord, I just ask that you soften the hearts and that you calm their nerves when it comes

1651
01:40:06.160 --> 01:40:07.160
to dating.

1652
01:40:07.160 --> 01:40:11.240
And Lord, that you know their path, you know where they need to be, Lord.

1653
01:40:11.240 --> 01:40:15.840
And I just pray that they continue to hear from you and that they get their direction

1654
01:40:15.840 --> 01:40:18.920
from you of what is the next best step for them.

1655
01:40:18.920 --> 01:40:21.560
Lord, I thank you for each and every one of them.

1656
01:40:21.560 --> 01:40:28.160
And I pray that they have a beautiful week and that they just continue to show up and

1657
01:40:28.160 --> 01:40:34.240
honor you and allow your light to shine through them.

1658
01:40:34.240 --> 01:40:42.120
So thank you, Heavenly Father, it's in your son's name we pray, in Jesus' name, amen.

1659
01:40:42.120 --> 01:40:48.560
All right ladies, have a blessed rest of your week and I look forward to hearing and seeing

1660
01:40:48.560 --> 01:40:52.240
you all in our app and chatting.

1661
01:40:53.080 --> 01:40:58.840
Definitely encourage your sisters, get involved, start activating that.

1662
01:40:58.840 --> 01:41:02.840
Let's start getting that app moving and going, okay?

1663
01:41:02.840 --> 01:41:04.320
All right ladies, have a great one.