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Right, there they are. Yes, yes, yes. What's happening, everybody?

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Wow, look at them come. Nice to see all of you.

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Yeah, our favorite time.

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And Sherry, I think you're going to, are you able to live in the group?

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Yes, I am definitely working on that.

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I know there's recently been challenges with that.

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If not, we can just post the replay in there.

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And so welcome, everybody. Super, super excited. Not going to take a whole lot of time here.

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Just super blessed to have the man, have Mr.

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John Maxwell on with us. Super excited for this.

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You know, I've done some I've done some calisthenics.

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I've stretched out my carpal tunnels and everything.

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And so I'm ready for all the notes because I always take five or six pages of notes and I'm just super excited.

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So thank you for joining us, John. We're so honored.

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I'm so right. Thank you. Thank you for having me again.

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And all of you, I love coming to the Higdon group.

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And and I developed a lesson today for you.

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And I think I've got too much material, but I'll get through as much as I possibly can.

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I got carried away, to be honest with you.

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I sometimes when I'm writing a lesson.

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I almost began to start writing a book, OK?

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And so I and so I got into this one and I thought, oh, my gosh, John, you're already starting to write another book by accident here.

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So so but but so I'm going to talk to you.

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The title of the lesson is the five temptations of a successful organization.

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And I hesitate with the word five because honestly, it may be three before the day is over.

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OK, I don't know if I'll get I don't know what I'm going to get through and what I'm not going to get through.

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But but but I'll say five. And if I don't get five, we'll we'll continue on the next time.

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But I love this lesson. When I when I say I love this lesson, when I when I put it together, I just thought, oh, there's so much more here than what I'm putting in it.

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And and I get very challenged by that when I start writing something and developing something.

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And I realize that it's just not even getting the depth that it really wants to.

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So anyway, let's do it, because here's we've all heard this.

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We've all heard this expression that the enemy of great is good.

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And that is it is so true.

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And so I ask myself the question, why is that?

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I mean, why is the enemy of great good?

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It would almost seem like that would be an asset.

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It would almost seem to me like good would be an asset to great that that you go from average to good to great.

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I mean, it would almost seem like it would be a step by step on the pathway to great.

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But it's not. And the reason it is not is because people get good and they stop.

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So that that makes me then go back and ask, OK, they're on their way.

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Why do they stop on their way? They stop growing. They stop learning.

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They stop risking. They, you know, they stop making improvement and change in their life.

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And what I've discovered is what happens is that, you know, prior success is a wonderful thing, but it's it's a very it's it can mess us up.

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It's why Bill Gates would say success is a lousy teacher, makes people think they can't lose.

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And I think people use their prior success as evidence that they've arrived.

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And there are these phrases that what happens is what happens when I do that, if I do that, if I say, OK, look,

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I'm already doing good and I'm getting enamored with with whatever that prior success is good. Here's what happens.

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When I began to catch these words, when I began to live in the past.

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And I began to live off the past.

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Those are two key phrases. I live in them. In other words, I like it so well, that's where I stay.

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And so I'm not growing. I'm not changing. I'm not learning. I'm not hungry.

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And I live off of them. In other words, I'm saying what I you know, I'm clipping coupons from from from yesterday.

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And and this this begins to be what I call an emotional mental shift that causes people to be very satisfied.

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OK. In my in my I have a coaching company and in that coaching company,

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I'm doing a mentoring thing with them right now that's just taken off pretty big for us.

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And I call it financial wisdom because what I'm trying to do is bring people

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into their lives that know more than I do for sure about money and finances.

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And I'm trying to, we're trying to give them financial wisdom.

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We're trying to help them be wise. Okay.

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And one of the teachings I'm doing that I'm,

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I know I'm going to write a book on this. I'm going to call it,

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I think the 1% factor.

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But one of the things I'm trying to do right now is I'm trying to help move them

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from 10%, the top 10% to the top 1%.

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Because when you and I get to the top 10%, we do very well. I mean,

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if you're the top 10%, you make all the money you need to make,

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you've got all the influence that you really need to have. I mean,

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the top 10% is really kind of quote,

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the mountain top of emotional satisfaction.

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But what I also know is this, remember it is so true that

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good is the enemy of great. So you're good. You're in that top 10%.

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What I also know is the compounding from that top 10% to the

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1%. I mean, we're, we're just talking 10 points now. No, I mean,

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we've got 90 behind us. Don't miss this.

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The compounding from 10% to 1% is much greater than the

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first 90%. The, the return is,

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it's not even comparative between the two.

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So it was kind of like the financial wisdom thing with my coaches

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and, and looking at successful organizations and say,

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why do so many of them that they just plateau?

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And I'm just going to just talk about it. Okay.

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I'm going to talk about it from my heart.

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I'm going to give you what I call business bullets. Okay. Business.

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A business bullet is just a one line statement that kind of kept encapsulates

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what I just said. Okay. For example, I'm all,

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let me give you a business bullet already. And that is

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neither you or your business ever arrives.

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If, if we can just kind of be comfortable with that statement and settle on it,

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it's going to do us good for this whole lesson. I there's no such thing as John

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Maxwell. I, I, I never will arrive and my organizations

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never will arrive. There's, there's no such thing as a destination,

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a place, um, an arrival.

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That is why I'm passionate about having a growth mindset instead of a goal

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mindset. Now, do I think goal setting is good? Of course I do.

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I'm not opposed to goal setting at all. I just know this.

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It's much more limited than a growth mindset.

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And when I was very young in my late twenties, 27, 28, I K I came to this.

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I, I looked at a very young leader growing and I said,

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am I going to set goals all of my life and try to hit those goals?

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And I said, I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it.

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I'm going to set goals all of my life and try to hit those goals or am I going

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to be committed to growth in such a way that I'll pass my goals.

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I'll hit my goals and I'll keep on moving, moving.

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And what happens is when you have a goal mindset,

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you have an arrival mindset. You have a destination mindset.

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You have a place, a time when you have a growth

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mindset, you don't have that.

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We, we, there's no growth. There's no, there's, there's no like,

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there's just no I've arrived or I, you know, I, when people say they hit their goal,

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I want to look at them and say, and is that your goal to hit your goal?

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I mean, is that it? I mean, you hit your goal. Well, now what do we do?

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You hit your goal to hit your goal to do now. What, what's my next goal?

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Well, I, again, I'm not a goal. I'm not anti goal setting,

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but I'm very pro growth mindset, not goal mindset.

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And all of my life I've had a growth mindset.

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And if you have a growth mindset, that business bullet, you, I mean,

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you just don't arrive. Your business never arrives.

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You never look at yourself and say, I got it down. I love this. I'll say,

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well, you know what? I just figured it out. And I look at them and say, really,

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I don't, you really figured it out. I, you're must be amazing. I've,

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I've never figured it out. I've, I've, I've, you know,

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I would like to sit at your feet and you teach me how you got all wise and

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figured it out. I I've, I've never figured it out ever have I, now I figured out

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how I was developing and how is growing, but I never got to see,

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I've never got to see the finish line. I've never got to see the end zone.

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I've I've never, you know, I've never, I guess I've never,

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I've never gotten a home plate. And so this is huge for me because

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let me say something very brutal about success.

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It can make you arrogant. It can make you complacent.

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Almost worse than arrogance and complacent is closed minded.

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I watch people when they get successful. And all of a sudden they're there,

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what are they doing? They're going around teaching everybody else how to do it.

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It goes back to the statement. I say, if you're at the head of the class,

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you're in the wrong class. Well,

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what I'm talking about is people that they get in the head class,

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because the, the objective of life of your business,

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Hey,

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Objective of your family life is to continue

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to get better every day, to grow, to learn,

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improve every day.

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So you use your, here's another business bullet here.

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Here we go, another one liner, here we go.

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You use your success as a stepping stone, not a pedestal.

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In other words, when I get it,

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all I did is I took another step in the journey.

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It's not like a pedestal.

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It's not like I'm on top of the mountain.

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Okay, this quote I'm gonna give you is 50 years old.

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When I was in my middle 20s, I love this quote.

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I memorized this quote and there was a period of time,

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not now, but there was a period of time

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that I quoted it every day for years.

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The quote is just simple, sad as that day.

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Sad as that day when any person

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becomes absolutely satisfied with the life

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that they're living, the thoughts they are thinking,

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the deeds that they are doing,

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until there ceases to be forever

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beating at the door of their heart,

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a desire to be greater and do something greater.

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And it's very sad for me or for you,

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for any of us to have that time in my life

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where no longer do we have that passion

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to keep growing and learning and developing.

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So the temptations I'm gonna give you now,

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there's a word that you need to carry with you

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through all of these temptations.

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And it's the word awareness, awareness.

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Well, more than anything else, I'm just making you aware.

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I'm just coming alongside of you and saying,

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could be a blind spot for you.

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It's been a blind spot for me, that's for sure.

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Remember, everything that I'm making you aware of,

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somebody made me aware of.

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There's no such thing as self-awareness.

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So when people say I'm a very self-aware person,

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I say you're also a self-delusional person.

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John Maxwell does it.

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The awareness that I have about myself

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is the awareness that other people have brought in my life.

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They've given to me because I have blind spots.

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I know I do.

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And if it's, you know, a blind spot is a blind spot.

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There's nothing clear about a blind spot.

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Somebody says, well, I may have a few blind spots

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while I'm checking them out.

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No, you can't check a blind, a blind spot's a blind spot.

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What part of a blind spot don't you understand?

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The only way I can have a blind spot open up to me

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is to have somebody kind enough to walk into my life

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and say, John, you've got a blind spot here.

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Let me help you with it.

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And they help me with it.

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Now, the moment they awaken my awareness,

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the moment they start correcting my eyesight,

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now that I see it, now notice this,

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once you are aware of something,

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your possibility of growing in awareness to it

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is ridiculously positive.

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But until you and I are aware,

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there is no shot of growth at all.

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It is impossible to be unaware and grow

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in that area where you're unaware.

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It's just not possible.

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But the moment somebody opens the shutters

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and lets a little light in,

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then all of a sudden it begins to happen.

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Okay, so this is kind of like an awareness thing for me

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and for you.

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And when I teach this lesson, understand,

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I'm teaching it to me.

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I'm teaching me.

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I wrote a book right before I get into these temptations.

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And I knew this was gonna happen.

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I got too much material.

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I knew this was gonna happen.

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Here we go.

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But I wrote a book a few years ago called No Limits.

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And I love the book because the first third of the book,

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I love the book because the first third.

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Basically in that book,

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I talk about three things that have to happen

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for you to be a no limit person.

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You have to have awareness.

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You have to make good choices.

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You gotta make, you have an awareness, good choices,

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and you have to maximize your gifts.

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And I love the book because the first part

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is all about awareness.

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And that's what this is about.

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It's just helping you and I just become very aware

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of where we are.

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And as I give you each temptation,

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there'll be a light bulb come on.

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And I love that.

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There'll be a light bulb come on.

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So let's go.

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Temptation number one

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is that leaders of successful organizations,

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they stop working on themselves.

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This is almost always where the flatlining begins.

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They just stop working on themselves.

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Why do I stop working on me?

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Because I think I've got it all figured out.

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And so when I think I've got it all figured out,

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why would I keep working on me?

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I've got, see, now I have answers instead of questions.

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I hope you never have your,

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I hope you always have in your life more questions than answers. I hope you do.

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I do. The moment I become Mr. Answer Man to you,

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I'm in trouble already. Now, now, now what am I doing? I'll sit down here.

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Listen to me. Here's, I got this figured out. Let me tell you,

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I did this and that. And now we are now see,

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because there are two very limiting, um,

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traits in leadership. One is ignorance and the other is arrogance.

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And I know they seem like they're worlds apart, but they're very close.

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They're their, their first cousins, to be honest with you,

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their first cousins, because you know,

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ignorance is I just don't know what I don't know.

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And arrogance means I know it all. And let me tell you, either one of them,

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I don't know what I don't know. And I don't know,

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and having desire to get it, which is ignorance,

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or I already haven't figured out. But both of those are paralyzers as far as,

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as growth is concerned and a know it all the,

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the person that has that arrogant feeling and a part about them.

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What happens is this. In fact, let me read this to you.

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Cause I wrote this down this morning,

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anyone who has stopped actively improving their business or themselves,

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but is actively telling others how to improve. You got a problem.

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In other words,

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if I'm not actively working on me and I'm not actively working on my companies,

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but I'm really active on telling you how to do it. That's arrogance. That's,

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that that's a know of all. And, and,

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and we all know the business never gets better till I get better.

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You get better. My good friend, Jim Rohn, what did he say? He said, you know,

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don't wish it were easier. Wish that you were better. I've always loved that.

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Quit wishing that the business was easier to run or that life was a little bit

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more simple and not as good. Don't, don't wish for easier. Wish,

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wish that you were better.

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And the business bullet along this kind of temptation,

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there are a couple of them probably, but let me give you at least one growing

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people, grow people. That's just the way it works. But when you don't grow,

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your people don't grow. And when a leader plateaus,

284
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you've heard me do the law of the lid before the 2100 laws of leadership.

285
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When the leader plateaus, if I plateau as a leader,

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what I do is I put a lid on myself,

287
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but what is even worse because leadership is influenced. I put a lid on you.

288
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And then why don't we do, I put a lid on the business.

289
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And all of a sudden I'm leading everything.

290
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I'm capping everything that isn't going where it wants to go. So, okay,

291
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that, that, I think, I think I've done enough on that one.

292
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Don't fall to the temptation of somehow not working on

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yourself. Let me, let me just say this.

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Okay.

295
00:17:49.440 --> 00:17:53.080
Every day I intentionally work on John Maxwell every day.

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And the reason I intentionally work on me is because I need more work than

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anybody I know, to be honest with you.

298
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And I also know that the better I improve, the better you improve.

299
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Everybody gets better when the leader gets better. Temptation. Number two,

300
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the, the, the, okay. I see this happen all the time.

301
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The leaders of successful organizations stop thinking big.

302
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They, they, they just stopped thinking big. They, and why do that? Well,

303
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because they've got momentum and they're on a roll.

304
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And so now instead of thinking big, they think safe.

305
00:18:32.360 --> 00:18:36.240
They start, they start playing. They're not playing to win.

306
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Now they're playing not to lose.

307
00:18:38.320 --> 00:18:43.120
What they're trying to do is they're trying to hold on to what they

308
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have. Let me just say this.

309
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When I'm holding on to what I have, I'm in trouble.

310
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That's already an indication that I've, I've succumbed to that temptation.

311
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Well, I, well, I, you know, I'm holding onto that, holding on that.

312
00:19:03.320 --> 00:19:07.760
Okay. Well, you know, when, if you have any momentum, don't sit on the ball,

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00:19:07.760 --> 00:19:11.680
run up the score. You just, it's, it's, it's let it, let it happen. Okay.

314
00:19:12.240 --> 00:19:13.080
Um,

315
00:19:14.600 --> 00:19:16.960
let me give you three strategies that'll keep you moving.

316
00:19:17.480 --> 00:19:22.080
And instead of stopping the ball, what number one strategy is, is,

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00:19:22.080 --> 00:19:25.960
is, is when you're doing well, uh, go shopping.

318
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Now let me explain, go shopping to you.

319
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One of the greatest ways to stretch your thinking and disturb your comfort zone

320
00:19:35.280 --> 00:19:39.160
is to go visit other organizations that are bigger, better, faster, smarter,

321
00:19:39.200 --> 00:19:40.400
more successful than you.

322
00:19:43.440 --> 00:19:47.240
What happens when we do that is we, it's very humbling. It's very humbling.

323
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And it's also a real dose in realism. All of a sudden,

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00:19:50.920 --> 00:19:54.320
we thought we were good until we saw somebody really good. Um,

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in other words, here's what I'm saying. When I say go shopping,

326
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jump the fence.

327
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:03.140
fence. You got to get over it.

328
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Whatever fence you've got around yourself and around your people around your

329
00:20:06.360 --> 00:20:10.040
company, you just have to, you have to jump, jump your fence.

330
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Okay. Where are you going? Where are you going right now?

331
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That stretches you.

332
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And who are you seeing right now that stretches you?

333
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And what are you doing right now that stretches

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you? Well, aren't those three good questions?

335
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Where are you going? Who are you seeing?

336
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What are you doing?

337
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Mark and I had dinner the other night with a very successful business person.

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And we've known this person for a long time and,

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and he's just ridiculously

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successful.

341
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And I just enjoyed it. We had a three hour dinner. I know Mark enjoyed it.

342
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It was so wonderful. I mean,

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I listened to him talking about what he's done in building companies and

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hit the expansion and, and, and very, very humble guy. He wasn't bragging at all.

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He just, he just,

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and how he did it and why he did it and how he knew to make the change.

347
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And I sit there at the table and there were, there was Mark and me and,

348
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and, and Reggie with him, with Mark and his guy and me,

349
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there were five of us at the table. And as I'm listening to him,

350
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I'm first thing I'm saying is I'm at the table. I'm,

351
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I'm number five, as far as I was the bottom of the class in this room. I,

352
00:21:37.440 --> 00:21:41.560
you know, dear Lord, I, you know, woo, everybody around here's bigger,

353
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better, faster, and smarter than me.

354
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And then I reveled in the fact that everybody was smarter than me.

355
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Don't don't don't don't miss this.

356
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You have to continually expose yourself to bigger, greater people to become

357
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bigger and greater.

358
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You do not get there by hanging with the people that are

359
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on your level.

360
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And I knew that intuitively as a young person. I mean, in my twenties,

361
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I was jumping the fence and I was jumping the fence because I looked at the

362
00:22:15.600 --> 00:22:18.200
people that I was around and I said, they're really good people,

363
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but they cannot get to the top.

364
00:22:21.200 --> 00:22:25.280
They're really good people, but they cannot take me where I've got to go find

365
00:22:25.280 --> 00:22:26.400
people, bigger, faster, smarter.

366
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And I wish I could describe the feeling I

367
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have. I purposely, I do this all the time. I'm, I'm going,

368
00:22:36.920 --> 00:22:40.520
I'm just two weeks away from a, a major,

369
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major round table of 150 people that many are billionaires.

370
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They're smarter, bigger, faster than me. I'm going to help. I'm going to,

371
00:22:48.120 --> 00:22:51.080
I'm going to be a part of it. I'm going to be teaching it. And, but,

372
00:22:51.080 --> 00:22:53.320
but the teaching isn't what thrills me.

373
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What thrills me is the interaction I'm going to have around the dinner table and

374
00:22:58.000 --> 00:23:02.200
asking the questions and hanging around. I re I remember, okay.

375
00:23:02.960 --> 00:23:05.560
I remember about 10 years ago, I, one night Margaret and I were having our

376
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conversation. I said, Margaret, I said, I've got to get stretched a little bit

377
00:23:09.440 --> 00:23:13.960
more right now. I'm, I just have to get stretched. And I remember I was invited.

378
00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:15.880
I don't know how they got me to invite me,

379
00:23:15.880 --> 00:23:20.480
but I was invited to take a cruise with, with, with,

380
00:23:20.520 --> 00:23:23.400
with a small ship of people, about probably about a hundred people.

381
00:23:24.400 --> 00:23:29.080
And two thirds of them were billionaires. They were all, I w I can tell you,

382
00:23:29.320 --> 00:23:32.320
I was at the bottom of the class. And I said, I just got to go meet him.

383
00:23:32.520 --> 00:23:35.040
I got to find out who they are. I got to ask questions.

384
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And I was gone for eight days with them. And I asked them questions and I mean,

385
00:23:39.240 --> 00:23:42.680
I I'd go to my cabin. I'm writing pages of notes.

386
00:23:42.960 --> 00:23:47.440
I developed relationships out of that that are huge relationships today in my

387
00:23:47.440 --> 00:23:50.120
life. In fact, I, I, I, I wish I had,

388
00:23:50.120 --> 00:23:53.320
I wish I had 30 minutes to talk about the return. You see,

389
00:23:53.400 --> 00:23:56.120
when you don't get around bigger people, you miss the return.

390
00:23:56.160 --> 00:23:59.920
I don't know what you're looking for, but the return is around the bigger people.

391
00:24:02.160 --> 00:24:04.840
The regurgitating is around the people you're around right now.

392
00:24:06.760 --> 00:24:11.400
The return is you have got to expose yourself to better thinking,

393
00:24:12.400 --> 00:24:16.280
to better ideas, to better strategy. And let me just say this,

394
00:24:17.640 --> 00:24:22.400
you know, you're on your way. When you become eager to be with them,

395
00:24:22.920 --> 00:24:26.680
you don't even know them. When I went on that cruise out of a hundred people,

396
00:24:26.680 --> 00:24:30.400
I think I knew maybe two of those people. I didn't know anybody, man.

397
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I just ask questions and serve them. And by the time those eight days were over,

398
00:24:34.680 --> 00:24:37.160
I mean, we, I, whoa, we were cooking. We were, I mean,

399
00:24:37.160 --> 00:24:40.520
we were just cooking big time now. Okay. I I've, I've, I've hit that enough,

400
00:24:40.880 --> 00:24:44.760
but I I'm just saying you got to go shopping.

401
00:24:44.760 --> 00:24:46.080
You got to go jump the fence.

402
00:24:47.880 --> 00:24:52.600
The second thing you need to do is you need to stir up what I call

403
00:24:54.800 --> 00:24:58.280
inspirational, healthy dissatisfaction.

404
00:24:59.360 --> 00:24:59.960
You got to.

405
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:02.000
You've got to stir it up.

406
00:25:02.000 --> 00:25:05.700
And I'm not talking about never being pleased with yourself

407
00:25:05.700 --> 00:25:08.240
or being always unhappy with yourself.

408
00:25:08.240 --> 00:25:09.820
And I'm not talking about beating yourself up.

409
00:25:09.820 --> 00:25:11.820
I'm not talking about any of that stuff.

410
00:25:12.860 --> 00:25:17.860
But I am talking about a creative awareness in your life

411
00:25:19.020 --> 00:25:21.340
that you can do better than you're doing

412
00:25:21.340 --> 00:25:23.600
and that you can be bigger than you are.

413
00:25:23.600 --> 00:25:25.980
And you can't get that again

414
00:25:27.180 --> 00:25:29.100
unless you're around bigger, better people.

415
00:25:29.100 --> 00:25:30.700
I'm telling you, you hang around the people

416
00:25:30.700 --> 00:25:32.220
you hang around with and after a while,

417
00:25:32.220 --> 00:25:33.500
you'll think you're smart.

418
00:25:35.220 --> 00:25:37.540
But the moment that I let go of that,

419
00:25:37.540 --> 00:25:39.940
that I said, no, I've got to go, I got to go find them.

420
00:25:39.940 --> 00:25:41.100
I got to go seek them out.

421
00:25:41.100 --> 00:25:44.800
And again, it goes back, Mark, to you in my discussion,

422
00:25:45.860 --> 00:25:47.820
I don't know, in Kuwait several years ago,

423
00:25:47.820 --> 00:25:49.300
one night at dinner when you said, John,

424
00:25:49.300 --> 00:25:51.700
I look at you and you can celebrate

425
00:25:51.700 --> 00:25:54.980
and then be dissatisfied in almost a moment.

426
00:25:54.980 --> 00:25:57.420
You just celebrate a victory and then you're on,

427
00:25:58.180 --> 00:25:59.580
okay, well, that was good.

428
00:25:59.580 --> 00:26:00.860
Are we all happy?

429
00:26:00.860 --> 00:26:04.260
High five, okay, now, oh, let's go.

430
00:26:04.260 --> 00:26:05.980
And that's when I described you the difference

431
00:26:05.980 --> 00:26:07.300
between best and better.

432
00:26:07.300 --> 00:26:10.220
Best is right now I'm doing my best to teach this lesson.

433
00:26:12.260 --> 00:26:14.620
And I'm giving you 100%, I always give you 100%.

434
00:26:14.620 --> 00:26:16.180
I wouldn't even show up if I couldn't give you 100%.

435
00:26:16.180 --> 00:26:17.140
In fact, let me tell you something.

436
00:26:17.140 --> 00:26:18.700
If you're not giving somebody 100%

437
00:26:18.700 --> 00:26:20.020
in anything that you're doing with them,

438
00:26:20.020 --> 00:26:21.140
can I explain something to you?

439
00:26:21.140 --> 00:26:22.000
Don't show up.

440
00:26:23.620 --> 00:26:27.240
Why would you not give 100% to a person that you value

441
00:26:28.060 --> 00:26:28.900
in your life?

442
00:26:28.900 --> 00:26:29.920
So I'm giving you 100%, so it's my best,

443
00:26:29.920 --> 00:26:30.920
but let me tell you something.

444
00:26:30.920 --> 00:26:33.040
I told you at the beginning of the lessons way too long,

445
00:26:33.040 --> 00:26:35.120
got too much material in it, I know I do.

446
00:26:35.120 --> 00:26:37.960
So it's my best for the moment, but guess what?

447
00:26:37.960 --> 00:26:39.880
Tomorrow, Aaron and I'll be working on this lesson.

448
00:26:39.880 --> 00:26:42.320
We'll be downside, we'll be tweaking this lesson.

449
00:26:43.280 --> 00:26:46.840
Okay, my best, which is my best, the ceiling today,

450
00:26:46.840 --> 00:26:48.760
tomorrow becomes my floor.

451
00:26:50.720 --> 00:26:52.820
I stand on best to get better.

452
00:26:53.820 --> 00:26:57.660
So what is my ceiling right now will be my floor tomorrow.

453
00:26:57.660 --> 00:26:59.700
And that's the way I treat everything in life.

454
00:26:59.700 --> 00:27:02.300
Everything, okay, well, good man, I reached for,

455
00:27:02.300 --> 00:27:04.720
I think I touched the ceiling, floor today,

456
00:27:05.680 --> 00:27:06.680
back at it again.

457
00:27:07.820 --> 00:27:10.780
And then I just say one more quick thing.

458
00:27:10.780 --> 00:27:15.780
It's just continue to set goals that do stretch your team.

459
00:27:17.860 --> 00:27:21.620
And again, we've talked about goals and growth

460
00:27:21.620 --> 00:27:22.460
probably enough.

461
00:27:23.020 --> 00:27:25.740
I don't think, well, let me just give you one story,

462
00:27:25.740 --> 00:27:26.860
just one quick story.

463
00:27:32.220 --> 00:27:35.920
Most of you probably know that I was a pastor for 25 years.

464
00:27:37.380 --> 00:27:38.220
And when I was 28,

465
00:27:38.220 --> 00:27:40.280
I had the 10th largest church in America.

466
00:27:41.740 --> 00:27:43.800
In fact, I had two 10th largest churches.

467
00:27:43.800 --> 00:27:45.660
I had one in Ohio and then I left it.

468
00:27:45.660 --> 00:27:49.980
I went to one in San Diego that wasn't near the 10th.

469
00:27:50.740 --> 00:27:52.780
It had plateaued for 14 years.

470
00:27:52.780 --> 00:27:56.860
And I sat down with my staff and I had a marker board

471
00:27:56.860 --> 00:27:58.940
and I drew a line with that marker.

472
00:27:58.940 --> 00:28:02.180
And I put 1,000 because the church was averaging back then.

473
00:28:02.180 --> 00:28:05.620
We're talking about 1970, eight, nine, 80.

474
00:28:05.620 --> 00:28:07.120
It was averaging 1,000 people.

475
00:28:08.580 --> 00:28:09.660
And I looked at my team and I said,

476
00:28:09.660 --> 00:28:11.420
let me explain something to you.

477
00:28:11.420 --> 00:28:14.300
Here's what I know about you as a staff.

478
00:28:14.300 --> 00:28:17.700
You have the ability to connect with,

479
00:28:17.700 --> 00:28:21.220
reach and involve 1,000 people.

480
00:28:21.220 --> 00:28:22.180
That's what I know.

481
00:28:24.180 --> 00:28:27.700
Then I took my marker and I drew a dotted line above that.

482
00:28:27.700 --> 00:28:29.740
And I put 2,000.

483
00:28:29.740 --> 00:28:31.780
And between the dotted line and the straight line,

484
00:28:31.780 --> 00:28:32.940
I put a big question mark.

485
00:28:32.940 --> 00:28:34.740
I said, the question is,

486
00:28:34.740 --> 00:28:39.420
do you have the ability to grow this organization to 2,000?

487
00:28:39.420 --> 00:28:41.480
And now they're in this discussion.

488
00:28:41.480 --> 00:28:42.320
Do we have the ability?

489
00:28:42.320 --> 00:28:43.180
So I let them discuss.

490
00:28:43.180 --> 00:28:45.380
I just, I love to just let them discuss for,

491
00:28:45.380 --> 00:28:47.340
I don't know, not long, eight, 10 minutes.

492
00:28:47.980 --> 00:28:49.020
What do you think?

493
00:28:49.020 --> 00:28:49.900
And then when they all got that,

494
00:28:49.900 --> 00:28:51.020
I said, let me explain it to you.

495
00:28:51.020 --> 00:28:51.860
You don't.

496
00:28:53.820 --> 00:28:55.540
Because if you did, you'd already have 2,000.

497
00:28:55.540 --> 00:28:56.380
Let me explain to you.

498
00:28:56.380 --> 00:28:58.660
You already got what you can do.

499
00:28:58.660 --> 00:29:01.160
There's no mystery to this at all.

500
00:29:01.160 --> 00:29:03.700
You already got what you can do.

501
00:29:03.700 --> 00:29:05.280
And if you want to got more,

502
00:29:06.520 --> 00:29:08.580
you got to know how to do more, better.

503
00:29:09.820 --> 00:29:10.660
So I looked at him.

504
00:29:10.660 --> 00:29:13.060
I said, the way you run everything here,

505
00:29:13.060 --> 00:29:15.660
you're 1,000, put 1,000 on your head.

506
00:29:15.660 --> 00:29:17.060
That's what you are.

507
00:29:17.780 --> 00:29:20.820
Now, can I help you become aware,

508
00:29:20.820 --> 00:29:23.620
back to this awareness of how to get to 2,000?

509
00:29:23.620 --> 00:29:27.940
What can we do, change, that'll help you get to 2,000?

510
00:29:27.940 --> 00:29:30.780
And it was a life-changing discussion.

511
00:29:30.780 --> 00:29:32.620
And then I said to them,

512
00:29:32.620 --> 00:29:34.420
now let me explain something to you.

513
00:29:35.480 --> 00:29:37.360
I'm gonna do my best to help you become aware

514
00:29:37.360 --> 00:29:39.660
and to help you change in a positive way.

515
00:29:39.660 --> 00:29:41.140
Change, get better, improve.

516
00:29:41.140 --> 00:29:43.300
Okay, change, improve.

517
00:29:43.300 --> 00:29:44.620
But then I said, here's the way it works.

518
00:29:44.620 --> 00:29:48.420
If I can't change you, then I'm gonna change you.

519
00:29:49.300 --> 00:29:51.820
Which means after next year, I'm gonna fire you.

520
00:29:53.000 --> 00:29:54.660
You won't be on the team anymore.

521
00:29:56.180 --> 00:29:58.020
But I want to change, and then I would,

522
00:29:58.020 --> 00:29:59.940
I smile and say, I want to change you.

523
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.820
I really want to change you because I don't want to really want to change you,

524
00:30:02.820 --> 00:30:03.960
but I'm going to do one of the two.

525
00:30:03.960 --> 00:30:06.760
I'm going to either change you or I'm going to change you.

526
00:30:06.920 --> 00:30:10.920
And it became the, it became kind of the talk around the staff. He, you know,

527
00:30:10.920 --> 00:30:13.740
he's either going to change us or he's going to change us. And,

528
00:30:14.000 --> 00:30:17.400
and they would laugh and I'd laugh too. And I'd look at him and say, and yes,

529
00:30:17.400 --> 00:30:21.440
I will do one of those two things. And, and, and, you know, and for some,

530
00:30:21.840 --> 00:30:24.000
they grew a little bit and they hung in a little bit longer with me.

531
00:30:24.000 --> 00:30:27.480
And for some, they, I changed them. Now this is huge.

532
00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:31.120
We're talking about when you're really good and you're really plateaued.

533
00:30:31.280 --> 00:30:35.160
In fact, the founder of the, of that congregation told me, he said,

534
00:30:35.720 --> 00:30:39.800
he said, we don't even go to other or other churches because he said,

535
00:30:39.800 --> 00:30:42.160
we have it. We have, we've got it down.

536
00:30:43.000 --> 00:30:45.400
And I looked at him and I thought you got nothing down here.

537
00:30:45.640 --> 00:30:49.960
You've been flat for 14 years. All you got is down as Texas plateau.

538
00:30:50.120 --> 00:30:53.960
That's all you got down. You, you got nothing down. And I got to get, we got it.

539
00:30:53.960 --> 00:30:55.840
We, we, we got to jump the fence.

540
00:30:57.640 --> 00:31:01.320
Okay. So the thinking has to change. Okay. Um,

541
00:31:06.960 --> 00:31:08.200
here's a business bullet

542
00:31:10.320 --> 00:31:12.160
grow as conditions permit.

543
00:31:13.360 --> 00:31:16.560
And if the conditions don't permit, create new conditions.

544
00:31:17.920 --> 00:31:23.000
Oh, I wish I had time to talk about that. You know, if, if whatever's it,

545
00:31:23.000 --> 00:31:24.480
the conditions of your company right now,

546
00:31:24.480 --> 00:31:28.800
just keep growing as conditions permit. But if the condition conditions don't

547
00:31:28.800 --> 00:31:30.840
permit, in other words, something's not the environment,

548
00:31:30.840 --> 00:31:33.800
the culture's not right. That then, then create and change, you know,

549
00:31:33.800 --> 00:31:38.400
Marcus Buck, Buckingham, what he do. He says, late leaders break through rules.

550
00:31:38.440 --> 00:31:42.960
They break through. They make things happen. Okay. Okay. Let me give you one more.

551
00:31:42.960 --> 00:31:46.640
I think I, well, let me see. It's one 35. Shoot.

552
00:31:49.280 --> 00:31:52.360
Oh, Ray, what do you want me to do, buddy?

553
00:31:52.360 --> 00:31:55.040
Do you want me to give you one more or do you want me to stop? Cause,

554
00:31:55.200 --> 00:31:59.880
and let them ask questions when it's your call. I'm not going to get,

555
00:32:00.680 --> 00:32:02.520
I'm not going to get through the lesson. That's for sure.

556
00:32:02.720 --> 00:32:07.040
Yeah. Yeah. No. I mean, I, I've gotten a ton of value so far.

557
00:32:08.240 --> 00:32:13.080
Um, I'm, I'm thinking we go into questions, but what,

558
00:32:13.080 --> 00:32:15.360
what do you guys, you know, drop a comment in there,

559
00:32:15.360 --> 00:32:18.480
but while they're responding, um,

560
00:32:18.520 --> 00:32:20.800
I forgot to ask you and I would love to ask you right now,

561
00:32:20.800 --> 00:32:25.080
is it okay if you say a prayer for us, for our wisdom and growth? And just,

562
00:32:25.640 --> 00:32:28.600
I just always appreciate you when I, when I get a chance to have,

563
00:32:28.840 --> 00:32:32.560
I'm sorry, I would be glad. Yeah. No, I didn't remind you. In fact,

564
00:32:32.560 --> 00:32:33.800
you know what Ray, what, you know,

565
00:32:33.800 --> 00:32:36.040
one of the people ask me sometimes I'll say,

566
00:32:36.040 --> 00:32:38.200
what is the prayer that you pray the most?

567
00:32:39.040 --> 00:32:42.720
And the prayer that I pray the most is out of James. If any person lacks wisdom,

568
00:32:43.160 --> 00:32:46.000
there you go. Let him ask God who gives it to him.

569
00:32:46.760 --> 00:32:50.160
Do you know that that speaks a lot to who I am done it right there.

570
00:32:50.280 --> 00:32:53.160
That tells you how dumb I am and that that's the number one prayer I have in my

571
00:32:53.160 --> 00:32:57.160
life is for wisdom, but yes, I will. And by the way,

572
00:32:57.160 --> 00:33:00.440
it's a promise that what happens is a promise that God gives us wisdom.

573
00:33:00.440 --> 00:33:05.000
We don't have, which is, which I'm incredibly vitally interested. Father,

574
00:33:05.000 --> 00:33:09.040
thank you for the group here. Thank you for Ray's leadership. My gosh,

575
00:33:09.040 --> 00:33:13.360
I love the fact that you would allow Mark and Aaron and myself to be

576
00:33:13.960 --> 00:33:15.600
part of the family and just, you know,

577
00:33:15.640 --> 00:33:18.560
come alongside and do our best to help and lift.

578
00:33:19.560 --> 00:33:23.160
And we're talking about things father that are bigger than us.

579
00:33:23.200 --> 00:33:24.560
We're talking about leadership.

580
00:33:28.120 --> 00:33:30.960
Really good at what we do and we grow.

581
00:33:32.160 --> 00:33:36.720
We influence a lot more people and help so many people that we just aren't able

582
00:33:36.720 --> 00:33:40.200
to help today. So our prayer is not a selfish prayer,

583
00:33:40.200 --> 00:33:44.480
but it is a leadership prayer. Extend our influence,

584
00:33:45.320 --> 00:33:46.720
increase our wisdom,

585
00:33:47.920 --> 00:33:52.080
help us to find favor and give us the,

586
00:33:52.680 --> 00:33:53.520
um,

587
00:33:54.880 --> 00:33:59.880
courage. That's a good word. Give us the courage to go in areas.

588
00:34:00.040 --> 00:34:03.240
We've never gone so that we can see things we've never seen.

589
00:34:03.240 --> 00:34:07.320
So we can do things we've never done because we learned things that we had

590
00:34:07.320 --> 00:34:11.760
never learned. That's a big prayer, but you're a big God.

591
00:34:12.679 --> 00:34:17.080
And we agree right now together that this is our prayer for this day and for

592
00:34:17.080 --> 00:34:21.080
this lesson in your name. Amen. Amen. Amen.

593
00:34:22.800 --> 00:34:27.800
And so, yeah, I'm, I'm getting, I selfishly wanted you to keep going. Uh,

594
00:34:27.800 --> 00:34:30.080
and it looks like most people want you to keep going to, so

595
00:34:31.239 --> 00:34:35.239
I could do that. Why don't we go on, please. Okay, good. Let me go to,

596
00:34:35.320 --> 00:34:40.199
let me go to temptation number three and I, this, I, then I, I'll, I'll prompt.

597
00:34:40.199 --> 00:34:43.520
I just have to stop because I, or I won't give you any Q and a time.

598
00:34:46.199 --> 00:34:49.639
Temptation three is leaders of successful organizations.

599
00:34:50.360 --> 00:34:55.120
Stop leading from the front. In other words,

600
00:34:56.520 --> 00:34:59.960
they stop being the example of what they want their.

601
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:03.120
people to be. That's what I say. They stop leading from the front.

602
00:35:03.420 --> 00:35:08.160
They no longer are a visual example. And why do they do that?

603
00:35:08.160 --> 00:35:11.320
Because, well, they, because they say, I don't have to do this anymore.

604
00:35:11.320 --> 00:35:12.200
My gosh. I mean, how,

605
00:35:12.440 --> 00:35:16.480
how many years do I have to lead from the front before I can, I can go to go do

606
00:35:16.480 --> 00:35:20.680
something. You know, they're looking for a shortcut. They're looking for easier.

607
00:35:20.760 --> 00:35:25.160
And let me just say this, the, the, the business,

608
00:35:25.360 --> 00:35:30.360
the business bullet here is that the leader always has to be the

609
00:35:30.360 --> 00:35:35.720
example. What did Jesus say? Follow others.

610
00:35:36.600 --> 00:35:41.400
He said, follow me, watch me, see how I do it.

611
00:35:42.000 --> 00:35:44.560
Learn from me, walk with me.

612
00:35:46.480 --> 00:35:49.920
Jesus looked at these disciples and he just said, let me explain something to you.

613
00:35:51.000 --> 00:35:53.280
You don't know how to do this, but don't worry.

614
00:35:53.360 --> 00:35:56.280
I'm going to show you how to do this.

615
00:35:57.520 --> 00:36:01.560
I can still remember Ray when my, my,

616
00:36:01.600 --> 00:36:06.400
when my congregation, I was 27, 28. My, when I cracked the top 10,

617
00:36:07.480 --> 00:36:10.960
and by the way, in a town of 25,000 people,

618
00:36:10.960 --> 00:36:14.560
and I had 3000 people in my church, I had over 10% of the population,

619
00:36:14.560 --> 00:36:17.240
my church. And I, and I could remember,

620
00:36:18.200 --> 00:36:22.960
I could remember the temptation to switch from people work to paperwork.

621
00:36:24.280 --> 00:36:27.440
Now paperwork has to be done, but can I tell you something?

622
00:36:27.440 --> 00:36:29.800
Almost all paperwork can be done by support staff.

623
00:36:30.680 --> 00:36:33.320
Very little paperwork needs to be done.

624
00:36:33.440 --> 00:36:36.840
A lot of thinking work has to be done by the leader, but not the paperwork.

625
00:36:37.320 --> 00:36:40.960
But I loved doing some of that paper. And I, and I, and, and, and, but,

626
00:36:40.960 --> 00:36:44.120
but how I, how did I build that congregation? How did I build that team?

627
00:36:44.520 --> 00:36:47.960
Because they saw me, they watched me. I was in front of them.

628
00:36:48.600 --> 00:36:52.800
I trained everybody because I was small. So somebody said,

629
00:36:52.800 --> 00:36:55.400
did you have a good training program? I had a great training program.

630
00:36:55.640 --> 00:36:59.080
I was the training program and I taught them everything that I knew.

631
00:36:59.080 --> 00:37:01.720
I taught them how to do it. I took them with me. I spent time.

632
00:37:01.880 --> 00:37:05.520
I literally, because it was a volunteer organization, I had a person,

633
00:37:05.960 --> 00:37:08.280
a different person every morning, five days a week,

634
00:37:08.440 --> 00:37:10.560
a different person every afternoon, five days a week,

635
00:37:10.720 --> 00:37:12.920
and a different person every evening, five days a week.

636
00:37:13.120 --> 00:37:17.840
And I was training 15 people every week. And in the afternoon, I say, Hey,

637
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:20.880
I'm going to go do this. Come with me. Cause I, I worked on this principle,

638
00:37:21.120 --> 00:37:24.720
never do work alone in my world. Never do ministry alone. Why,

639
00:37:24.840 --> 00:37:28.920
why would I do it alone? When I can have somebody beside me show and tell people,

640
00:37:28.920 --> 00:37:31.840
do what people see. Now, let me just say this. When people say,

641
00:37:31.840 --> 00:37:35.040
how did you become a rainmaker? How'd you build companies? It's very simple.

642
00:37:35.040 --> 00:37:39.240
I did it. And I took people with me and taught them how to do it. That's why,

643
00:37:39.600 --> 00:37:42.560
when, when, when, when leaders don't have other leaders,

644
00:37:42.560 --> 00:37:45.120
I always look and say, have you not developed any of those leaders?

645
00:37:45.120 --> 00:37:48.680
Are you just expecting them to lead without you hanging with them? And,

646
00:37:48.960 --> 00:37:53.400
and, or as Mark would talk about the, the, the, the, the power of proximity,

647
00:37:53.880 --> 00:37:57.800
but there's a great temptation to stop the people work,

648
00:37:57.800 --> 00:38:01.600
which is being in front of them and being an example and being with them. It's,

649
00:38:01.600 --> 00:38:05.040
it's Aaron. It's, uh, it's another lesson that you, that you,

650
00:38:05.400 --> 00:38:08.800
that we did a while back called the, uh, the leaders leadership dance,

651
00:38:08.800 --> 00:38:13.280
the leadership dance, how you go before them with them, behind them, above them,

652
00:38:13.280 --> 00:38:16.200
beneath them. It's a dance you keep moving, but, but,

653
00:38:16.320 --> 00:38:19.640
but the common denominator in the leadership dances, the leader's dancing.

654
00:38:20.840 --> 00:38:25.080
He's dancing. She's dancing. It's not like the leader says, tired of dancing.

655
00:38:25.400 --> 00:38:29.040
Let the other people dance. Like, Hey, let me watch my people dance. No, no, no.

656
00:38:29.320 --> 00:38:33.080
And, and, and the temptation is that when we begin to succeed,

657
00:38:33.080 --> 00:38:37.320
we withdraw or we pull back from that people work.

658
00:38:38.280 --> 00:38:41.320
And we kind of go in the back room and we start to do,

659
00:38:42.000 --> 00:38:44.800
we start to do paperwork. Uh,

660
00:38:46.960 --> 00:38:50.360
you know, next. Okay. Aaron, you just had to remind me.

661
00:38:51.440 --> 00:38:54.640
Maybe next time I'm going to pick up there because here's where I'm getting,

662
00:38:54.640 --> 00:38:55.960
going right now. I'm, I'm,

663
00:38:57.800 --> 00:39:01.600
I'm going into nine things that what me, what it means to, to, to live,

664
00:39:01.640 --> 00:39:04.040
to be upfront with people. And there's nine.

665
00:39:04.040 --> 00:39:06.080
And I think I'm just not going to be able to pull that one off.

666
00:39:06.480 --> 00:39:10.200
So maybe we can have a part one and a part two, if it's okay with you, Ray,

667
00:39:10.200 --> 00:39:15.200
and I'll come back in and, and underline this just to just let me remind.

668
00:39:15.200 --> 00:39:17.680
Okay. Because there's nine and they're good.

669
00:39:17.760 --> 00:39:21.880
They're practical stuff that I need to, to give and then illustrate just a

670
00:39:21.880 --> 00:39:25.200
moment. So anyway, but, so you got three of the five,

671
00:39:25.200 --> 00:39:27.160
or you got really two and a half of the five is what you got.

672
00:39:27.160 --> 00:39:29.760
And that's about what I figured when I did the lesson again,

673
00:39:29.880 --> 00:39:32.800
I'm working on a lesson, honestly. And I finished, I said, John,

674
00:39:33.080 --> 00:39:35.560
you're supposed to be writing a lesson. You're writing a book. I mean,

675
00:39:35.560 --> 00:39:38.720
I'm looking at this thing and I'm sitting there. I'm saying, all right,

676
00:39:38.720 --> 00:39:41.480
give me a little time. I'll go write this sucker. Okay. So anyway,

677
00:39:41.640 --> 00:39:45.080
hope it helped you. And, and I see Mark's with us. Of course,

678
00:39:45.120 --> 00:39:47.760
Aaron's been with us and, and good to see you, Mark.

679
00:39:47.760 --> 00:39:51.440
I know you had a hectic, hectic morning and of course, Ray with us. So who,

680
00:39:51.560 --> 00:39:54.000
can we do maybe 15 minutes of Q and A?

681
00:39:55.000 --> 00:39:59.880
Yeah, absolutely. And so, you know, raise do the digital.

682
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:05.040
Hand raise if you have a question you want to ask I knew Mary would be on it. She's she's she's quick

683
00:40:07.520 --> 00:40:12.960
Um real real quick, um, you know what let's see is there anything

684
00:40:15.440 --> 00:40:23.280
Um the other day I was talking with um a guy that i'm i'm discipling, uh in the bible and he is

685
00:40:24.320 --> 00:40:27.360
I can probably take all the wealthy people I know

686
00:40:27.920 --> 00:40:29.360
and have met

687
00:40:29.360 --> 00:40:31.680
Put them together and he has more than them

688
00:40:32.400 --> 00:40:34.960
And he said something the other day. He said ray

689
00:40:35.680 --> 00:40:40.480
So often i'll see someone that they hold on to the millions and completely miss the billions

690
00:40:41.040 --> 00:40:44.640
And and that's you know what you were talking about you you said

691
00:40:45.600 --> 00:40:47.600
you know you get in this place of

692
00:40:48.000 --> 00:40:52.960
You know, you're you're no longer thinking big you're worried about, you know, keeping what you got and

693
00:40:53.760 --> 00:40:54.560
You know

694
00:40:54.560 --> 00:40:56.560
Powerful powerful lesson

695
00:40:56.640 --> 00:41:00.640
And I got a couple other takeaways, but we'll get we'll get to that after uh after our time with you

696
00:41:01.120 --> 00:41:02.320
and so

697
00:41:02.320 --> 00:41:03.440
Let's you know what?

698
00:41:03.440 --> 00:41:07.520
Uh, mary, I know you get a question in uh, every time we have john and I love you

699
00:41:07.520 --> 00:41:10.400
I think you've been spending some time with john, too. I want to make sure

700
00:41:10.800 --> 00:41:15.760
Um, I want to get some people that maybe haven't had a question with with john if that's okay

701
00:41:16.160 --> 00:41:19.040
Uh, and so let's go to carol carol. What is your question?

702
00:41:19.600 --> 00:41:26.160
Well, I just had a clarification on um, so john was talking about all the temptations and then he started into the

703
00:41:26.800 --> 00:41:28.800
three strategies to keep the ball

704
00:41:29.760 --> 00:41:31.760
Moving and he went go shopping

705
00:41:32.320 --> 00:41:38.240
Stir up inspirational healthy dissatisfaction, but he never I don't think he got to the third one. I'm dying jump the fence

706
00:41:38.800 --> 00:41:44.640
What? Yeah, I did I did I did I jumped that number number three good. I I'm sorry for that

707
00:41:45.200 --> 00:41:47.200
That's all right didn't aim to do it

708
00:41:47.360 --> 00:41:49.360
Didn't aim to do it. That's continue

709
00:41:50.160 --> 00:41:52.160
to set goals that stretch your team

710
00:41:53.440 --> 00:41:58.880
And I I didn't say that but that's in other words and but I gave the illustration when I was in san diego

711
00:41:59.200 --> 00:42:05.440
Of the 1000 2000, you know this this, you know, either you know, either you change or i'll change you type of thing

712
00:42:05.520 --> 00:42:07.520
So yeah, that was number three

713
00:42:07.760 --> 00:42:10.480
Perfect. Thank you so much. Yeah, you're certainly welcome

714
00:42:11.040 --> 00:42:13.040
Great. Thank you. Uh, lisa

715
00:42:14.400 --> 00:42:16.240
Hey, thank you

716
00:42:16.240 --> 00:42:23.920
This is a unique question. Maybe it's not my question to you. John is when you meet with people that are bigger

717
00:42:24.160 --> 00:42:27.600
Better and smarter than you what kind of questions do you ask them?

718
00:42:27.920 --> 00:42:32.640
A lot of times I seem to get a little bit intimidated and I get quiet. So i'm like, okay

719
00:42:32.800 --> 00:42:34.720
they're no different than me, but

720
00:42:34.720 --> 00:42:37.920
What questions do you act though ask those types of people?

721
00:42:38.560 --> 00:42:41.040
First of all, that's exactly what happened to me the first time

722
00:42:41.680 --> 00:42:44.480
when I got it when I when I got into the high clover and I

723
00:42:45.200 --> 00:42:47.200
I was the low clover, you know

724
00:42:47.680 --> 00:42:49.440
and and honestly

725
00:42:49.440 --> 00:42:52.880
It was an event called exchange and I didn't ask a question

726
00:42:53.120 --> 00:42:57.680
There were several people and not just me, but there were maybe a hundred people at this conference

727
00:42:58.240 --> 00:43:01.840
And and I I never asked my question and on the way home

728
00:43:02.320 --> 00:43:08.160
I had a lot of self-talk and and I asked why why john? Why did you not ask that?

729
00:43:08.320 --> 00:43:12.080
Well, you were intimidated. Maybe the question you asked wasn't a very good question

730
00:43:12.640 --> 00:43:14.960
And and on the way home I was driving

731
00:43:15.440 --> 00:43:20.080
I I had a self self-talk of which I said i'm never gonna let happen this this will never happen again to me

732
00:43:20.480 --> 00:43:24.560
I I may ask a question everybody in the room looks and says that man is just not a very smart man

733
00:43:24.960 --> 00:43:29.440
But I am going to ask the I am going to ask the questions and so I became committed to that

734
00:43:30.000 --> 00:43:33.840
And and that was a that was a kind of little pivot for me as a I mean

735
00:43:33.840 --> 00:43:36.240
I'm a very young leader at at that time

736
00:43:36.800 --> 00:43:40.480
But uh when I when I talk about my learning lunches, which I have every month

737
00:43:41.040 --> 00:43:47.440
I have learning lunches every month and I ask seven questions, but I thought i'd given you the seven questions in the past

738
00:43:49.040 --> 00:43:54.640
I believe I did if you go back to those seven questions. Those are my questions right there. They they work

739
00:43:55.040 --> 00:43:58.880
And and and you don't have to have a lot of questions. Here's what I know about this

740
00:43:59.120 --> 00:44:01.920
I'm, i'm mentoring mark and teaching him this right now

741
00:44:02.720 --> 00:44:06.020
You want to have a few really good questions basic questions?

742
00:44:06.560 --> 00:44:08.560
And when you ask the question

743
00:44:09.520 --> 00:44:11.840
Their answer will open up a better question

744
00:44:12.720 --> 00:44:14.480
it's almost like

745
00:44:14.480 --> 00:44:17.600
Once you learn how to ask good questions and are comfortable with it

746
00:44:18.240 --> 00:44:21.140
The conversation carries the level of questions

747
00:44:22.240 --> 00:44:30.240
And I found that to be very true the conversation cover it carries the when the conversation gets really good and it's really stretchy

748
00:44:30.720 --> 00:44:36.240
Those questions began to appear in your mind to you know to ask more even more stretchy questions, but

749
00:44:36.960 --> 00:44:38.960
Start with the seven at the lunch, okay

750
00:44:39.120 --> 00:44:41.200
Got it. And thank you Aaron for posting them

751
00:44:41.600 --> 00:44:47.840
Yeah, so Aaron Aaron posted the seven questions in the comments, which is just pure gold. Thank you Aaron

752
00:44:48.320 --> 00:44:51.700
And one thing i'll tell you anytime we teach scripts

753
00:44:52.320 --> 00:44:56.000
Or you learn what to say or what to ask?

754
00:44:56.720 --> 00:44:58.720
Don't treat this as

755
00:44:59.600 --> 00:45:01.600
Okay

756
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:04.080
Okay, you know, what's the greatest lesson you ever learned? Okay, great. What are you learning

757
00:45:04.080 --> 00:45:09.120
right now? Okay, okay, great. Like, don't, you know, like, listen. And I find that anytime I

758
00:45:09.120 --> 00:45:14.160
teach scripts, I have to teach, okay, you got to listen too. It's not just getting through these,

759
00:45:14.160 --> 00:45:19.600
you know, this checklist of things. It's like, pay attention. Because we see people make a mistake

760
00:45:19.600 --> 00:45:25.680
with scripts all the time. The point is to listen to what they say. Let's go to Brian.

761
00:45:25.680 --> 00:45:31.520
Hey, John, how you doing? Good, Brian.

762
00:45:32.720 --> 00:45:37.440
Quick question for you. My wife and I have been doing marriage ministry and helping with events

763
00:45:38.080 --> 00:45:43.440
for about 16 years. And the challenge we're having now, because we broke away from the

764
00:45:43.440 --> 00:45:47.520
organization, due to the fact they took God out of their mission statements and things,

765
00:45:47.520 --> 00:45:52.800
which I didn't appreciate, but we decided to go on our own. And we were focusing more on helping

766
00:45:52.800 --> 00:45:57.440
couples apply what they know to do versus just learn it. Because you can learn a lot of things,

767
00:45:57.440 --> 00:46:01.760
it's great to know it. But I look at you as an educated idiot, if you don't actually apply what

768
00:46:01.760 --> 00:46:06.960
you know to do, because transformation comes from application or through application. And so I'm

769
00:46:06.960 --> 00:46:12.160
trying to figure out, and it's kind of been stumping me, leaders lead by example, we've been,

770
00:46:12.160 --> 00:46:16.800
you know, investing in our marriage two to three events ourselves, you know, every year and leading

771
00:46:16.800 --> 00:46:21.440
and hosting small groups. And I'm trying to figure out how do I get other couples to hunger for that

772
00:46:21.440 --> 00:46:27.040
growth and to want to change? They seem like they're happy with the average or being, you know,

773
00:46:27.040 --> 00:46:31.200
as good as everybody else at church or wherever else, or, you know, workplace, etc. They don't

774
00:46:31.200 --> 00:46:35.040
really want to work on their marriage. And I guess it's uncomfortable, but how do you get them to see

775
00:46:35.040 --> 00:46:40.960
that they could be so much better? Well, I think that's a problem every leader faces, you know.

776
00:46:41.840 --> 00:46:47.840
It's what I call upfront conversations. You need to have upfront expectations with your conferences.

777
00:46:48.800 --> 00:46:54.720
And that the only way that you improve is to practice. Information never improved anybody.

778
00:46:55.280 --> 00:47:00.480
Practice improves people. And so what you need to do is you need to build your seminar

779
00:47:01.200 --> 00:47:09.040
around practices that they need to practice. And be a lot less informational loaded,

780
00:47:09.040 --> 00:47:15.280
and be a lot more application loaded for them. And what will happen is you'll separate your

781
00:47:15.280 --> 00:47:22.560
players from pretenders real quick. Because pretenders, again, they just want a conference,

782
00:47:22.560 --> 00:47:27.040
and you know, what time do we eat? And the players, of course, they're willing to put

783
00:47:27.040 --> 00:47:31.680
effort and skin in the game. But I think it's how you approach the way you do your conference.

784
00:47:32.320 --> 00:47:38.560
And if you do it with practices, I think you'll come out a lot better. You'll begin to separate

785
00:47:38.560 --> 00:47:42.640
the wheat from the chaff. That's a biblical phrase. Yeah, and that's what we're doing in

786
00:47:42.640 --> 00:47:46.000
our events, but I'm trying to figure out how to get them to even come to an event because they

787
00:47:46.000 --> 00:47:49.520
don't even have an interest. They're like, well, we're doing okay. We've been married 10 years.

788
00:47:49.520 --> 00:47:53.040
We're doing okay, but they're struggling. They keep coming to us. We need help, but they don't

789
00:47:53.040 --> 00:47:56.960
want to go to anything because they don't want the help. Well, it's because I think they want

790
00:47:56.960 --> 00:48:02.480
counseling more than equipping. Okay. Again, counseling is working on the weaknesses of

791
00:48:02.480 --> 00:48:06.320
people. Equipping is working on the strengths of people and what they can do in practice.

792
00:48:07.200 --> 00:48:12.960
So I think that you need to set up your promotion, set up your little seminar, everything

793
00:48:13.600 --> 00:48:21.680
based upon equipping and practice, not conversation or information. Okay.

794
00:48:21.680 --> 00:48:23.040
Very helpful. Thank you.

795
00:48:23.040 --> 00:48:29.920
Thank you. And Brian, I'll just add one thing. I'll expand on this after our time here with John,

796
00:48:29.920 --> 00:48:38.160
but like, you know, to me, it's the, what was it called? When Harry met Sally effect,

797
00:48:38.160 --> 00:48:42.880
I'll have what she's having. Okay. If you know what I'm talking about, and that is do people

798
00:48:42.880 --> 00:48:50.800
around you marvel at how wonderful your marriage is? Because to me, that's like, do you have people

799
00:48:50.800 --> 00:48:58.320
in your neighborhood, in your communities that are saying, dude, how do you guys have such an

800
00:48:58.320 --> 00:49:04.480
incredible marriage? So like being the light that makes people hungry for that. Like I, you know,

801
00:49:04.480 --> 00:49:08.800
I have, you know, people are asking me, dude, what are you doing differently? You seem happier. You

802
00:49:08.800 --> 00:49:14.480
seem like you're whatever. And, and so I just, you know, the application of ourselves, let us,

803
00:49:14.480 --> 00:49:19.760
let us be challenged that wherever we go, they see the honoring of your wife, the respecting of the

804
00:49:19.760 --> 00:49:25.520
husband, the loving of the, you know, I just want to throw that out there just to, just to challenge

805
00:49:25.520 --> 00:49:30.080
you. Right. It just like, you know, John mentioned Jim Rohn, don't wish for things to be easier,

806
00:49:30.080 --> 00:49:33.760
wish for you to be better. And so just want to throw that out, but I'll expand more on that.

807
00:49:34.320 --> 00:49:41.040
If you're okay with that. Good. Very good. Mary, did we lose you? You hung in there?

808
00:49:42.000 --> 00:49:47.520
Tina go first. I'm good. I'm good. Okay. Tina, what's up?

809
00:49:48.480 --> 00:49:55.840
Hi. So one of the areas that I struggle is empathy because there's nothing, there's never

810
00:49:55.840 --> 00:49:59.600
been anything easy in my life. Everything has been hard and I've had to overcome.

811
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:05.680
since I was a child and so what books would you recommend that I read to help me in that area

812
00:50:05.680 --> 00:50:10.080
because I know it's needed as I grow in leadership and especially as my organization grows I don't

813
00:50:10.080 --> 00:50:15.280
want to always have the attitude life sucks work harder like you know so what would you recommend

814
00:50:15.920 --> 00:50:23.920
yeah well the classic book is Scott Peck's book the road less traveled that's if you've not read

815
00:50:23.920 --> 00:50:28.400
that book all of you need to get it it's it's a it's probably the book's probably written 35 40

816
00:50:28.400 --> 00:50:36.640
years ago but his opening sentence is life is difficult and and I love it and and his thesis

817
00:50:36.640 --> 00:50:41.680
in the first paragraph of the book you almost have the book you need the book because he has

818
00:50:41.680 --> 00:50:46.640
great examples but the first paragraph I've never seen anybody summarize a book as well as Scott

819
00:50:46.640 --> 00:50:52.800
Peck did in the first paragraph of of the road less travel and he basically says I'm paraphrasing

820
00:50:52.800 --> 00:51:03.280
obviously life is difficult at the moment that you embrace that life is difficult it no longer

821
00:51:03.280 --> 00:51:10.720
becomes difficult but then he goes on to say but if you reject that idea and think life should be

822
00:51:10.720 --> 00:51:20.400
easy it will increasingly be difficult the longer that you live and it's a great uh mindset

823
00:51:20.400 --> 00:51:27.120
statement that uh you know that when people are talking about how challenging it is or difficult

824
00:51:27.120 --> 00:51:32.880
or that you know the valley's dark or the mountain's steep I look at them and say and I had

825
00:51:32.880 --> 00:51:38.960
no idea that it was supposed to I and you know unless you go to Disneyland for a day where else

826
00:51:38.960 --> 00:51:45.440
is it going to be that way it that's the way life is but the moment you embrace it now it's instead

827
00:51:45.440 --> 00:51:52.640
of a of a obstacle becomes a challenge to you so anyway the Scott Peck's book the road less travel

828
00:51:52.640 --> 00:51:59.360
be a great book for you right all right David what's happening man

829
00:52:03.280 --> 00:52:10.240
hey Ray hey John uh thank you hello it's uh thank you for being here today okay thank you

830
00:52:10.800 --> 00:52:16.720
uh a question I have is uh as a as a leader we want to improve ourselves continually

831
00:52:17.760 --> 00:52:25.840
uh I found myself getting involved in several different uh self-development things and sometimes

832
00:52:26.400 --> 00:52:33.680
I get a little overwhelmed as a leader how do we take those things that we're wanting to improve

833
00:52:33.680 --> 00:52:40.080
ourselves with and say we've got so many to do and I understand that you know prioritize them

834
00:52:40.080 --> 00:52:49.680
but how how do how could I best manage my time better to to to do all the things that I've

835
00:52:49.680 --> 00:52:55.520
invested in and continue to be a good leader well you probably are scattered a little too thin

836
00:52:55.520 --> 00:53:03.440
probably for you less is more uh you've heard me do the uh clear the five things I focus on in

837
00:53:03.440 --> 00:53:10.160
personal growth which is communication leadership equipping attitude and relationships plus my faith

838
00:53:10.880 --> 00:53:18.480
those are my six arenas that I specialize in that I work on that I decided in my 20s to not only

839
00:53:18.480 --> 00:53:25.920
learn from but to write my books off of so the the the challenge is you can't grow in every area

840
00:53:25.920 --> 00:53:29.280
and you don't even want to grow in every area I don't know if I've used this illustration with

841
00:53:29.280 --> 00:53:33.760
you or not but if we were playing a game of trivia right now all of you would beat me I would be at

842
00:53:33.760 --> 00:53:38.080
the bottom of the class why I don't know trivia why don't I know trivia because it's trivia

843
00:53:39.040 --> 00:53:44.720
what part of that don't you understand trivia has never added one thing to your life as far

844
00:53:44.720 --> 00:53:50.240
as development growth or money nothing nobody has ever said because I know how many stars are

845
00:53:50.240 --> 00:53:56.720
in the sky it's helped me become highly successful in life so trivia is trivia and it's I don't mind

846
00:53:56.720 --> 00:54:02.240
you loving trivia but if you spend your life on trivia you don't get to spend your life

847
00:54:02.240 --> 00:54:06.240
on on the important things of life I mean you just have to look at yourself and ask yourself

848
00:54:06.240 --> 00:54:10.480
very simple question what am I going to read I can't read everything what am I going to experience

849
00:54:10.480 --> 00:54:14.560
can't experience everything who what am I going to think on I can't think on everything and you

850
00:54:14.560 --> 00:54:19.840
just reduce it down my life is extremely simple in growth but I had to get rid of all those other

851
00:54:19.840 --> 00:54:26.160
distractions I use those other distractions for release or entertainment you know go go go watch

852
00:54:26.160 --> 00:54:31.120
a good movie or you know nothing nothing wrong with doing something like that that just relaxes

853
00:54:31.120 --> 00:54:36.720
you that I'm not saying that but I'm saying for your personal growth agenda stay in stay in these

854
00:54:36.720 --> 00:54:40.800
areas that are going to give you the return and and stay away from the other areas it doesn't

855
00:54:40.800 --> 00:54:46.000
bother me to be not well-rounded because I'm not well-rounded in fact when I look at well-rounded

856
00:54:46.000 --> 00:54:50.720
people I say yeah you're well-rounded and do you want me to buy you what do you want me to do now

857
00:54:50.720 --> 00:54:55.600
with you it's just like my brother one time when they looked at Larry and he was talking about risk

858
00:54:55.600 --> 00:54:59.680
taking and they didn't want to take any risk and they looked at him he said well what happens if I

859
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:04.480
everything. Larry said, well, or he looked at him and said, Larry, what happens if you lose

860
00:55:04.480 --> 00:55:07.520
everything? And Larry looked at him and said, well, then I'll just live like you. You know what

861
00:55:07.520 --> 00:55:14.240
I mean? It's not a problem. And it's, you know, once you prioritize yourself and understand what

862
00:55:14.240 --> 00:55:20.240
you're going to work on, stay right there, just less, less is more, less is more. Yeah. Perfect.

863
00:55:20.240 --> 00:55:27.040
Thank you. Yeah. I recently discovered that Benjamin Franklin is often misquoted

864
00:55:28.000 --> 00:55:34.240
when it comes to being a good communicator. He said, be a Jack of all trades, a master of one,

865
00:55:34.800 --> 00:55:39.440
not a master of none. And most people miscommunicate that they say master of none,

866
00:55:39.440 --> 00:55:44.080
and it's kind of confusing. So be a master of one. What do you want to be the master of?

867
00:55:44.080 --> 00:55:50.000
And no other things, but focus on one. I got my list off of Benjamin Franklin, by the way,

868
00:55:50.000 --> 00:55:55.360
when I started prioritizing what I would do. He was such a wise person. He's a great inventor.

869
00:55:55.440 --> 00:56:02.720
But when I was in college, I studied his life and I got Benjamin Franklin reduced everything down to

870
00:56:02.720 --> 00:56:08.160
the things that he could work on every day. And that gave me the idea of that was my first seed

871
00:56:08.160 --> 00:56:14.400
in intentional growth and development. Yeah. Daily bread. I love it. I love it. Crystal.

872
00:56:17.440 --> 00:56:24.960
Hi. Thank you for taking my question. When it comes to the Bible verses about do not

873
00:56:24.960 --> 00:56:32.880
rely on your own understanding, I am trying to understand the difference of human intuition

874
00:56:32.880 --> 00:56:37.520
versus being guided by the Holy Spirit and just how to teach that to my children.

875
00:56:39.120 --> 00:56:42.720
Yeah, that's a great purse. Not to rely on your own intuition. I've been right out of my

876
00:56:42.720 --> 00:56:48.080
understanding a lot of times and didn't do too well, to be honest with you. Now let me marry

877
00:56:48.080 --> 00:56:53.600
them. They're not supposed to be divorced. It's not either or. It's not like I have this incredibly

878
00:56:53.600 --> 00:56:58.720
godly wisdom and therefore I chuck my earthly wisdom because it's for, you know, wood, hay,

879
00:56:58.720 --> 00:57:03.520
and stubble. It isn't that. Let me just explain to you. This is this is how it works. And this

880
00:57:03.520 --> 00:57:07.280
is how it connects. And this is how you can relate it to your children. It's because it's a great

881
00:57:07.280 --> 00:57:17.280
question you're asking. Once you've received heavenly wisdom, it leads to earthly understanding.

882
00:57:17.840 --> 00:57:26.080
The key is obedience. When God begins to show you a higher way, don't resist it. Learn it.

883
00:57:27.040 --> 00:57:33.760
That higher way that he shows you translates into a better way in living your life.

884
00:57:34.640 --> 00:57:42.560
It all, let me say, all of God's principles turn into practicalities. Everything that he gives you

885
00:57:43.520 --> 00:57:50.160
that's above you, you can utilize and use. But you've got to get what he has so that you can

886
00:57:51.040 --> 00:57:58.240
engage in and enhance what you have. So he'll take heavenly wisdom and it'll give you better

887
00:57:58.240 --> 00:58:03.440
earthly wisdom than you've ever had before because you have the addition of what he knows because

888
00:58:03.440 --> 00:58:09.520
his ways are higher. So you teach your children that you seek first his kingdom and all of his

889
00:58:09.520 --> 00:58:15.440
righteousness and all the things about God that he is the one you seek. As you seek him,

890
00:58:16.480 --> 00:58:23.680
he will give you obedience lessons. Follow him in obedience and that's where the understanding

891
00:58:23.680 --> 00:58:32.320
comes in. When you understand it, now you can use it and practice it and apply it. And that's how

892
00:58:32.320 --> 00:58:38.800
heavenly wisdom through obedience becomes understanding, which becomes practicality,

893
00:58:38.800 --> 00:58:41.920
things that you can do, which you can pass on to your children. Does that make sense?

894
00:58:44.480 --> 00:58:52.240
Yeah, yeah, it does. And when you say seek him, what would you say would be the most practical

895
00:58:52.240 --> 00:58:57.680
way of saying that to a child? Is there an action around that? Like I know prayer and

896
00:58:58.240 --> 00:59:02.800
guidance and asking, is there just like a simple way of explaining?

897
00:59:03.600 --> 00:59:11.840
Yes, there is. What you do is in the next month in your prayer time and seeking wisdom from God,

898
00:59:12.800 --> 00:59:16.400
when you feel that he gives you wisdom, which he does, correct? There are times when you say,

899
00:59:16.400 --> 00:59:19.520
I think God just connected with me. Are you with me there?

900
00:59:23.760 --> 00:59:31.200
Yes. Okay. Yeah. Stay right with me. When that happens, you walk in obedience to that.

901
00:59:32.160 --> 00:59:38.400
And walking in obedience to that, you'll get a result from it. That's what you pass on your

902
00:59:38.400 --> 00:59:44.960
children. Last week when I was talking to God, I sensed that he gave this to me. Here's what I did.

903
00:59:45.600 --> 00:59:53.440
I practiced it. Here's what I received. That's also available to you. Because if our earthly father,

904
00:59:53.440 --> 00:59:58.560
he knows how to give good gifts to his children, how much more will our heavenly father give good

905
00:59:58.560 --> 00:59:59.840
gifts to those who ask him?

906
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:03.480
Does that make, so just take, you teach your children

907
01:00:03.480 --> 01:00:06.640
out of your practice and experience yourself.

908
01:00:06.640 --> 01:00:08.240
Does that make sense to you?

909
01:00:08.240 --> 01:00:10.480
It does, yeah, that's beautiful, thank you so much.

910
01:00:10.480 --> 01:00:11.840
Oh, it'll work, trust me.

911
01:00:11.840 --> 01:00:16.840
You'll be a good model and mama to follow, trust me.

912
01:00:17.280 --> 01:00:18.800
Amen, amen.

913
01:00:18.800 --> 01:00:22.600
John, thank you so much, appreciate you so very much.

914
01:00:22.600 --> 01:00:24.520
Gang, if you're able to stay on,

915
01:00:24.520 --> 01:00:27.600
I have a few points that I'll share,

916
01:00:27.600 --> 01:00:30.280
but we just get so much wisdom from you, John.

917
01:00:30.280 --> 01:00:32.240
Super appreciate you, man.

918
01:00:32.240 --> 01:00:35.720
Yeah, and Mark, I was, before you were able to get on,

919
01:00:35.720 --> 01:00:37.960
I was talking with Ray and he would like to connect

920
01:00:37.960 --> 01:00:38.800
with you.

921
01:00:38.800 --> 01:00:40.760
He did, he shot me a text.

922
01:00:40.760 --> 01:00:41.600
Thank you.

923
01:00:41.600 --> 01:00:42.720
Okay, so you already got that.

924
01:00:42.720 --> 01:00:43.880
Yes, thank you, John.

925
01:00:43.880 --> 01:00:44.720
Thank you, John.

926
01:00:44.720 --> 01:00:47.000
Then we're done, blessings on all of you.

927
01:00:47.000 --> 01:00:51.120
I hope you enjoyed it and let's keep growing together.

928
01:00:51.120 --> 01:00:53.640
Yes, yes, yes, awesome, thank you, John.

929
01:00:53.640 --> 01:00:55.320
John, love you.

930
01:00:55.320 --> 01:00:56.880
So if you're able, stick around.

931
01:00:56.880 --> 01:00:59.280
I got seven quick points for you.

932
01:00:59.280 --> 01:01:04.280
I'm gonna go kind of backwards and Crystal's question,

933
01:01:06.200 --> 01:01:08.560
my, Crystal's still on.

934
01:01:08.560 --> 01:01:10.840
Well, it'd be good for you guys to hear anyway.

935
01:01:10.840 --> 01:01:12.040
Oh, she's on, okay.

936
01:01:12.040 --> 01:01:17.000
So here's, I love what he said.

937
01:01:17.000 --> 01:01:19.320
I agree with everything that he said.

938
01:01:19.320 --> 01:01:24.120
The one thing I'll add is your logic, your logic,

939
01:01:24.120 --> 01:01:29.120
my logic, our logic will keep us safe, okay?

940
01:01:29.600 --> 01:01:31.040
Obedience is not safe.

941
01:01:32.680 --> 01:01:35.320
People have a calling and they may have a calling

942
01:01:35.320 --> 01:01:37.440
for 20 years because they're relying

943
01:01:37.440 --> 01:01:40.240
on their own understanding, relying on their own logic.

944
01:01:41.120 --> 01:01:42.960
Obedience is not logical.

945
01:01:43.800 --> 01:01:46.240
When he had me do an altar call at a business meeting,

946
01:01:46.240 --> 01:01:49.840
that is not, that's not logical, it makes no sense.

947
01:01:49.840 --> 01:01:52.680
When he had me go to Ohio for a podcast

948
01:01:52.680 --> 01:01:56.360
and got four views, that made no sense.

949
01:01:56.360 --> 01:02:00.240
When he had me at a time where, you know,

950
01:02:00.240 --> 01:02:03.120
things were really, really wild financially

951
01:02:03.120 --> 01:02:06.040
and had me donate a very large amount of money,

952
01:02:06.040 --> 01:02:07.720
that made no sense.

953
01:02:07.720 --> 01:02:10.720
So obedience doesn't make sense.

954
01:02:10.720 --> 01:02:13.640
Your logic will fight obedience.

955
01:02:13.640 --> 01:02:15.880
You do not wanna share that vulnerable story.

956
01:02:15.880 --> 01:02:18.760
You do not wanna share that thing you've never told anyone

957
01:02:18.760 --> 01:02:21.000
because you wanna be safe.

958
01:02:21.000 --> 01:02:22.640
So logic will keep you safe.

959
01:02:22.640 --> 01:02:25.040
Obedience will make you grow.

960
01:02:26.000 --> 01:02:27.600
And in understanding that,

961
01:02:27.600 --> 01:02:30.120
and this will come up in other points here too,

962
01:02:30.120 --> 01:02:33.720
is the biggest, I had such a big breakthrough Monday morning

963
01:02:34.600 --> 01:02:39.600
of just really understand the death of the old man,

964
01:02:40.040 --> 01:02:42.760
the death of the old person, okay?

965
01:02:43.800 --> 01:02:48.440
We often turn to that body in the grave

966
01:02:48.440 --> 01:02:51.240
and try to coach it and mentor it and say,

967
01:02:51.240 --> 01:02:53.800
why can't you be better and what's wrong with you?

968
01:02:53.800 --> 01:02:57.400
And we turn to that, it's like digging in the grave,

969
01:02:57.400 --> 01:02:58.520
pulling someone up and said,

970
01:02:58.520 --> 01:03:00.720
come on, get motivated already.

971
01:03:00.720 --> 01:03:03.440
And we are a new creation.

972
01:03:03.440 --> 01:03:05.280
So what God wants you to do

973
01:03:05.280 --> 01:03:07.840
is he wants you to step into that new creation

974
01:03:07.840 --> 01:03:10.720
because you have Christ inside of you and with you.

975
01:03:10.720 --> 01:03:13.760
And so he wants you to step into the kingdom

976
01:03:13.760 --> 01:03:15.240
and stepping into the kingdom

977
01:03:15.240 --> 01:03:17.240
is you're no longer beating yourself up.

978
01:03:17.240 --> 01:03:19.680
You're no longer focused on what you did wrong

979
01:03:19.680 --> 01:03:21.040
or what you blew.

980
01:03:21.040 --> 01:03:23.840
You're looking at everything as how can I grow?

981
01:03:23.840 --> 01:03:25.080
How can I get better?

982
01:03:25.960 --> 01:03:30.960
And so I would, and I really believe,

983
01:03:32.840 --> 01:03:37.320
I had two different, it was pretty wild, two weeks ago,

984
01:03:37.320 --> 01:03:40.320
I connected with just a mighty man of God

985
01:03:40.320 --> 01:03:43.880
has done all kinds of wild stuff.

986
01:03:43.880 --> 01:03:47.880
And he's like, hey, I prayed about you, Ray.

987
01:03:47.880 --> 01:03:50.120
And man, God's got you on a fast track

988
01:03:50.120 --> 01:03:51.480
and it's because of your obedience.

989
01:03:51.480 --> 01:03:54.280
And I'm like, oh, cool, great, that's cool.

990
01:03:54.280 --> 01:03:58.440
Next day, I connected with another super mighty man of God.

991
01:03:58.440 --> 01:04:00.560
I mean, these guys, both of them

992
01:04:00.560 --> 01:04:03.960
have been in front of millions of people.

993
01:04:03.960 --> 01:04:05.320
He says, Ray, I prayed for you.

994
01:04:05.320 --> 01:04:07.440
And man, you're really on the fast track.

995
01:04:07.440 --> 01:04:10.120
God's got you on, like literally word for word,

996
01:04:10.120 --> 01:04:12.040
I don't know that they know each other.

997
01:04:12.040 --> 01:04:15.040
And so the velocity of your growth

998
01:04:15.040 --> 01:04:18.720
does have to do with the velocity of your obedience.

999
01:04:18.720 --> 01:04:20.280
So I wouldn't brag so much

1000
01:04:20.280 --> 01:04:21.800
about God's really been nudging me

1001
01:04:21.800 --> 01:04:24.640
to do this thing for years now.

1002
01:04:24.640 --> 01:04:26.360
I wouldn't brag about that

1003
01:04:26.360 --> 01:04:30.440
because you can take a calling that could be yours

1004
01:04:30.440 --> 01:04:32.320
and stretch it out to one years

1005
01:04:32.320 --> 01:04:35.320
because you just focus on the old person, the dead person.

1006
01:04:36.680 --> 01:04:39.480
For help around that, if you struggle with that concept,

1007
01:04:39.520 --> 01:04:43.360
I think it's, I wanna say 2 Corinthians 5, 17 and 19.

1008
01:04:43.360 --> 01:04:46.200
I don't know that off the top of my head, I don't think.

1009
01:04:48.080 --> 01:04:49.920
I'll get it to, oh no, that is it.

1010
01:04:49.920 --> 01:04:50.960
Okay, there you go.

1011
01:04:50.960 --> 01:04:53.040
2 Corinthians 5, 17, 19.

1012
01:04:53.040 --> 01:04:58.040
And so, and we don't have crystal,

1013
01:04:58.840 --> 01:05:00.440
we don't have to overcomplicate.

1014
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:06.000
it for the kids, they already get it. Just ask God your question. And they will, and they'll

1015
01:05:06.000 --> 01:05:11.840
get an answer because they won't overthink it. And give them examples like John said,

1016
01:05:11.840 --> 01:05:17.760
right? You know what? I prayed on this, and I, of course, took six months to get the answer.

1017
01:05:17.760 --> 01:05:23.360
You'll get it tonight. And so kids are just naturally better at this sort of thing because

1018
01:05:23.360 --> 01:05:29.920
they just don't overcomplicate it. They don't overthink or anything. But certainly give examples

1019
01:05:29.920 --> 01:05:36.720
I like that. Tina Joy, I don't know if she's still on, but I think it'll help people whether

1020
01:05:36.720 --> 01:05:46.000
she's on or not. So when you, whatever is repeated in your life, is God knocking on your heart

1021
01:05:46.640 --> 01:05:53.200
to try to improve you. And the lesson is repeated until it's learned. Okay? And so if you're

1022
01:05:53.200 --> 01:05:59.360
noticing all these schmuckaroos that aren't doing the work, and all these people that aren't showing

1023
01:05:59.360 --> 01:06:06.720
up very powerfully, there's a reason for that pattern. And that pattern is to grow you, to make

1024
01:06:06.720 --> 01:06:14.320
that exact part of you more Christ-like. And so instead of frustration, instead of like,

1025
01:06:14.320 --> 01:06:19.920
dang it, I wish these people would step it up. I have to question my response because my response

1026
01:06:19.920 --> 01:06:27.200
isn't of Christ if it's repeated. Once it becomes of Christ, the lesson goes, you got the lesson,

1027
01:06:27.520 --> 01:06:35.280
on to the next lesson, which there will be more lessons. And so love, love is what changes

1028
01:06:35.280 --> 01:06:41.680
everything. Love is what is like the Old Testament call heaping hot coals on their head.

1029
01:06:42.320 --> 01:06:49.200
So praying for your enemies, blessing those who curse you, blessing those who want to harm you.

1030
01:06:49.680 --> 01:06:58.960
That is what changes people. And so know that all of us are wired, our old person is wired to beat

1031
01:06:58.960 --> 01:07:04.000
ourselves up. So the person not doing enough, they're beating themselves up too, just like we

1032
01:07:04.000 --> 01:07:12.240
are. And so loving them, edifying them, praising them, making it okay that they haven't done

1033
01:07:12.240 --> 01:07:18.080
anything. Number one, that will keep them around forever. They won't leave. People don't leave a

1034
01:07:18.080 --> 01:07:24.400
relationship where they're left. They just don't. And number two, it will actually unlock new

1035
01:07:24.400 --> 01:07:29.600
thoughts with them. Maybe I'm not so bad. Maybe I'm not so terrible. And man, how do I become

1036
01:07:29.600 --> 01:07:37.520
like that? How do I not be frustrated with my people that aren't doing anything? Brian, to

1037
01:07:37.520 --> 01:07:50.160
your question, I mentioned a little bit, but one of my buddies, he is so good at honoring his wife.

1038
01:07:51.600 --> 01:07:59.280
It is like nothing I've ever seen. I mean, if I'm around him, I mean, I think I do a decent job

1039
01:07:59.280 --> 01:08:06.400
until I met him. And I'm like, whoa, this is awesome. And I just want to sit around. I'm like,

1040
01:08:06.480 --> 01:08:15.520
hey, how do you think? I've never seen anyone do this ever. But if we're at a restaurant

1041
01:08:16.399 --> 01:08:23.120
and his wife leaves the table, as she's coming back, he'll stand up and he'll wait for her to

1042
01:08:23.120 --> 01:08:29.680
be seated. I've never seen anyone do that ever. And so I'm like, wait, what's happening? I've

1043
01:08:29.680 --> 01:08:37.760
never seen it. And that's one silly example of so many different things that he does to honor

1044
01:08:37.760 --> 01:08:46.479
his wife. Just a concept. How lucky am I? How lucky am I that she is my wife? He will say it

1045
01:08:46.479 --> 01:08:52.000
in front of people. Now, what's the tendency? You'll find most people have the tendency to kind

1046
01:08:52.000 --> 01:08:57.439
of rib their spouse in front of others. Yeah, he's kind of a knucklehead. You know what I mean? Just

1047
01:08:57.520 --> 01:09:06.640
kind of rib him in front of other people. And that's not very powerful. But how can I show up

1048
01:09:06.640 --> 01:09:13.680
so that every restaurant I go into, every meeting I go into, every couple that we hang out with,

1049
01:09:13.680 --> 01:09:19.760
they're like, bro, how do you guys have such a great marriage? And not just faking the funk,

1050
01:09:19.760 --> 01:09:25.920
not just putting on the good show, but like, you know, really, how do we show up so people?

1051
01:09:25.920 --> 01:09:34.880
So my answer is, oh, you might consider attending my course. So now we become the course versus I

1052
01:09:34.880 --> 01:09:41.840
got to promote this course because no one wants it. You see what I mean? And so that's hopefully

1053
01:09:41.840 --> 01:09:54.800
helpful. I did like how as soon as I had him pray, he shifted to a story about Jesus. I like that.

1054
01:09:54.800 --> 01:10:00.160
Got to get him to pray earlier. I did like that.

1055
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:08.000
I mean, he's, you got to realize, I mean, a lot of, a lot of his groups, you know, he's in very secular territory.

1056
01:10:08.000 --> 01:10:19.000
I talked about my buddy and the whole holding on to millions to skip the billions. And that is, that is a, it is such a big deal being so worried about losing what you got.

1057
01:10:19.000 --> 01:10:28.000
And, and that's why I posted that that phrase of those who put their, their hand to the plow and look back aren't a fit for the kingdom of God.

1058
01:10:28.000 --> 01:10:38.000
That's not heaven. That has nothing to do with salvation. The kingdom of God is accessible here on earth and how you think and how you focus.

1059
01:10:38.000 --> 01:10:49.000
Are you focused on lack, limitation, worry, and all of those things, or are you focused on, and he's with me.

1060
01:10:50.000 --> 01:11:00.000
And he's with me. He's with me wherever I go. His presence is with me wherever I go. I am saved. I am new. I am cherish. I'm beloved. I'm a, I'm chosen.

1061
01:11:00.000 --> 01:11:09.000
He chose me before the world was formed. He counted the numbers on my head. He can't take his eye off me, man.

1062
01:11:09.000 --> 01:11:16.000
Right. It's, it's you stepping into that. And the more, the more that you get there, the more you'll catch yourself when you're out of the kingdom.

1063
01:11:16.000 --> 01:11:19.000
You'll catch it. You're like, I don't like that.

1064
01:11:19.000 --> 01:11:29.000
When I understood that and, and I'm still, I'm still process of learning haven't arrived in literally any way.

1065
01:11:29.000 --> 01:11:35.000
But when I just started to understand that I noticed certain pain in my body went away.

1066
01:11:35.000 --> 01:11:45.000
I noticed that all of a sudden, these little favor, all of a sudden, two company owners reach out to me. All of a sudden, this check comes in unexpectedly. All of a sudden, this thing comes in.

1067
01:11:46.000 --> 01:11:54.000
He wants to bless you, but we slow him by focusing on the old focus on what's wrong.

1068
01:11:54.000 --> 01:12:03.000
And last I want to share with you an experience I had where I slipped into arrogance.

1069
01:12:03.000 --> 01:12:13.000
And, and so, you know, Friday, I, we were at a dinner with two people, very, you know, very successful.

1070
01:12:13.000 --> 01:12:24.000
Once upon a time, they had, I think, 11 McDonald's franchises, which if you understand McDonald's franchises, it's a million bucks per franchise and a hundred grand to attend Hamburger University.

1071
01:12:24.000 --> 01:12:30.000
Right. So they were, they were doing okay. You know, over $25 million in sales a year.

1072
01:12:31.000 --> 01:12:41.000
And, and they started talking about some, some things that I felt I knew about. Right.

1073
01:12:41.000 --> 01:12:56.000
So they started talking about Rehobroam and the splitting of Israel, the north and south and the lost, you know, the 10 lost tribes of Israel, which to my study, I don't believe there was a 10 lost tribes of Israel.

1074
01:12:57.000 --> 01:13:05.000
Because it says those of pagan went this way and those of the Lord went that way. Right. So that was between the 12, although they named them, you know, two different things.

1075
01:13:05.000 --> 01:13:14.000
And so I just, I just fell into this kind of, you know, I didn't like openly rebuke them, but I gave my feedback.

1076
01:13:14.000 --> 01:13:20.000
And in thinking about that, I wasn't very godly.

1077
01:13:21.000 --> 01:13:29.000
Now I don't, they didn't, they weren't super offended and how dare you terrible person, but I wasn't as loving as I could have been.

1078
01:13:29.000 --> 01:13:43.000
And what reminded me of this is, you know, afterward, I prayed about that and, and I, and I found that, yeah, you know what, I did step into that.

1079
01:13:44.000 --> 01:14:01.000
Love, just being of love, you know, Ephesians 429 has always been such a solid verse for me of do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs.

1080
01:14:01.000 --> 01:14:03.000
That's all about where they are.

1081
01:14:03.000 --> 01:14:05.000
Where are they?

1082
01:14:05.000 --> 01:14:12.000
When we think we know something that they don't know that is contrary to what they know, how do we, how do we love them instead?

1083
01:14:12.000 --> 01:14:14.000
You know, how do we love them anyway?

1084
01:14:14.000 --> 01:14:29.000
And, and so it was just, just a, not a condemnation because a condemnation is not of Christ, but a conviction of, hey, next time I encounter that scenario, I believe I'm going to do better at it.

1085
01:14:29.000 --> 01:14:37.000
I really do. And, but this is the, now I see my other part of my note here.

1086
01:14:37.000 --> 01:14:50.000
How did I actually come to that conclusion? Right? Because John, he kind of started up off with, you know, hey, any, you can't have self-awareness, any awareness I have someone else pointed out.

1087
01:14:50.000 --> 01:14:52.000
Well, that was my wife.

1088
01:14:52.000 --> 01:15:00.000
So on the, on the way home, you know, and she knows, I mean, she knows me and, you know, I kind of, I kind of stepped back a little bit in conversation.

1089
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:04.640
after I saw them going down a path biblically that I didn't think was accurate.

1090
01:15:05.520 --> 01:15:10.800
I kind of, you know, step back a little bit and she goes, you know, when you think you're right,

1091
01:15:11.520 --> 01:15:15.200
you know, you kind of distance yourself and stuff, right? That's, I mean,

1092
01:15:15.200 --> 01:15:17.680
she doesn't pull any punches, man. She just punched me right in the face.

1093
01:15:18.240 --> 01:15:23.520
And so, of course, I get in the defense, right? Like, oh, you're talking about, you know,

1094
01:15:23.840 --> 01:15:32.560
I'm right. And man, our spouses are such wonderful gifts from God. I mean,

1095
01:15:32.560 --> 01:15:37.840
she has helped me in so many different ways. My arrogance, conceit, pride, boastfulness,

1096
01:15:37.840 --> 01:15:45.120
all of that stuff. Who else would tell me other than her? And now I did.

1097
01:15:46.960 --> 01:15:51.840
I did later after I got over the initial defense and puff upness, you know, that's why they don't

1098
01:15:51.840 --> 01:15:57.040
put leaven in the bread, right? Because it puffs the bread up, right? It's pride. And so,

1099
01:15:58.160 --> 01:16:03.920
after my puffy uppiness and my, you know, pride response, and I got into prayer and

1100
01:16:03.920 --> 01:16:14.080
the Lord's like, yeah, yeah, you were. Yeah, I guess I was. Dang it. Okay. How do I improve?

1101
01:16:14.080 --> 01:16:19.120
So it was about this much beating Ray up and this much, how do I grow? How do I get better?

1102
01:16:19.120 --> 01:16:29.600
Right. And so, you know, just so grateful for that. You got to be grateful for that stuff.

1103
01:16:29.600 --> 01:16:34.640
You can't beat yourself up. Our triggers, our tribulations, our anger, frustrations,

1104
01:16:34.640 --> 01:16:41.040
disappointments, all of those things are there to reveal to us where we need to grow and where

1105
01:16:41.040 --> 01:16:48.000
we need to learn. And that is what actually, that Friday night is what led me to the Monday

1106
01:16:48.000 --> 01:16:55.120
morning breakthrough of, oh, this is what it means, right? This is what it means to be stepping

1107
01:16:55.120 --> 01:17:02.240
into the kingdom. And that's why the hand to the plow thing, what's ahead? What's my daily bread?

1108
01:17:02.240 --> 01:17:09.040
What can I do? What can I grow from? Not where'd I screw up? Where am I not enough? Right. All of

1109
01:17:09.040 --> 01:17:19.040
that stuff. And then I did have this on here. Oh, and the asking, I used to have a lot of

1110
01:17:19.040 --> 01:17:24.960
trepidation around asking, you know, bigger people questions or being around more successful people

1111
01:17:24.960 --> 01:17:32.080
that I hadn't hired. Lisa, kind of to your question, and just know God puts you in front of

1112
01:17:32.080 --> 01:17:40.080
them for a reason. Okay. You would not be around bigger people unless God wanted that to happen.

1113
01:17:41.840 --> 01:17:48.720
And so God wanted you in that room. God wanted you by that person or else you wouldn't have

1114
01:17:48.720 --> 01:17:54.960
made it happen. Right. One of the Proverbs is you shall not stand before ordinary men.

1115
01:17:57.040 --> 01:18:00.800
Right. Those of the righteous shall stand before Kings, not of ordinary men.

1116
01:18:00.800 --> 01:18:10.880
And so you're in that room. God anointed that. So for us to feel less than is disrespectful to

1117
01:18:10.880 --> 01:18:18.240
whose we are and who's in us. Because Holy Spirit moved us. You know, Jesus was led by the Spirit

1118
01:18:18.240 --> 01:18:23.440
up to the wilderness, right? We were led into that room by the Holy Spirit. He anointed that room.

1119
01:18:24.160 --> 01:18:28.240
And so we just have to remember, because the devil wants to pull you back. The devil wants you to

1120
01:18:28.240 --> 01:18:31.840
focus on what's different about them, why they're so much better than you, right? The devil wants to

1121
01:18:31.840 --> 01:18:38.080
pull you back. And so we got to know, man, God put me in this room. Man, God put me on with John

1122
01:18:38.080 --> 01:18:46.320
and Mark. Man, God sent me over here. Wow. Dang. Thank you, man. Thank you for your favor in front

1123
01:18:46.320 --> 01:18:52.080
of me and all around me. And so you just got, you'll recognize that. So it's not, there is no

1124
01:18:52.080 --> 01:18:57.600
not enoughness because you have the creator of the heavens and the earth inside of you.

1125
01:18:58.560 --> 01:19:03.520
Imagine that. Imagine thinking you're not enough when you have the creator of the heavens and the

1126
01:19:03.520 --> 01:19:09.120
earth. He made the connection between Orion and Pallides. Like you got that inside of you.

1127
01:19:11.520 --> 01:19:17.920
How can we be not enough? All right. There we go. That's my two cents there. Crystal.

1128
01:19:22.240 --> 01:19:29.520
So Ray, I just have a question about your pride conversation that you were just having. And

1129
01:19:32.880 --> 01:19:38.560
I'm just curious, like, you know, in those situations, and I get that they're believers

1130
01:19:38.560 --> 01:19:43.120
and they believe something different than you. And I get with that specific example,

1131
01:19:44.080 --> 01:19:52.080
maybe there's not something, you know, deeply needed, but where is our responsibility in love

1132
01:19:52.080 --> 01:19:58.560
and coming from the truth? And I think that there's so much in society right now that is,

1133
01:19:58.560 --> 01:19:59.760
you know, saying that we're

1134
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:06.800
love is accepting lies. And I feel like sometimes the truth is

1135
01:20:06.800 --> 01:20:10.240
offensive, and you might offend people. And I get that there's

1136
01:20:10.240 --> 01:20:13.600
like an eloquence in a way of going about things. But I do

1137
01:20:13.600 --> 01:20:17.680
feel like sometimes love is telling the truth, even if it

1138
01:20:17.680 --> 01:20:21.720
offends somebody. And so I'm just I'm like in that space of,

1139
01:20:22.440 --> 01:20:26.480
you know, where is our responsibility? And what is love

1140
01:20:26.480 --> 01:20:30.480
really, in those instances, if something is, you know, truly

1141
01:20:30.760 --> 01:20:33.240
harmful to somebody, I get that we're looking through our own

1142
01:20:33.240 --> 01:20:36.280
projection. But if we're looking through a biblical truth

1143
01:20:36.280 --> 01:20:42.080
projection, or biblical truth stance, I guess, you know,

1144
01:20:42.400 --> 01:20:45.440
Pastor Mark France, I don't know if you ever listened to him, but

1145
01:20:45.440 --> 01:20:49.120
I love when he says, you know, I would rather offend somebody

1146
01:20:49.120 --> 01:20:53.520
with the truth and kiss them with lies, you know, and I, I

1147
01:20:53.520 --> 01:20:56.560
believe that too. So I guess like, where's the, where's the

1148
01:20:57.560 --> 01:20:58.440
compass there?

1149
01:20:59.880 --> 01:21:06.480
Yeah, so there's a few facets here, right? Marketing

1150
01:21:07.600 --> 01:21:15.240
connection. Right. And so one is and love is, is, you know, I

1151
01:21:15.240 --> 01:21:18.480
really didn't understand what radical love was, until I

1152
01:21:18.480 --> 01:21:22.280
watched the Darren Wilson movies, The Father of Lights,

1153
01:21:22.280 --> 01:21:24.680
where he's going up to satanists and not condemning

1154
01:21:24.680 --> 01:21:27.400
them or shaming them or praying with them. And some of them

1155
01:21:27.400 --> 01:21:29.600
didn't kind of come to Christ, because all they're really

1156
01:21:29.600 --> 01:21:33.520
looking for is love anyway. Right. And so I would, I would

1157
01:21:33.520 --> 01:21:36.840
encourage, if you haven't, if you struggle with this kind of

1158
01:21:36.840 --> 01:21:42.000
scenario, go watch the Darren Wilson movies. They're absolutely

1159
01:21:42.000 --> 01:21:46.520
incredible. Father of Lights is I don't know, that's probably

1160
01:21:46.520 --> 01:21:52.400
the most popular one. I like it. Definitely. Holy Ghost, I

1161
01:21:52.400 --> 01:21:56.160
believe Holy Ghost Reborn, Finger of God. There's, there's

1162
01:21:56.160 --> 01:21:59.320
several of them. They're all fantastic, right? Some of them

1163
01:21:59.320 --> 01:22:03.240
have moments where it's like, that part was okay, but radical

1164
01:22:03.240 --> 01:22:14.200
love, right. And so I believe it. So, so one is, there is

1165
01:22:14.200 --> 01:22:20.120
always a way to say things in a loving manner. But we default to

1166
01:22:20.160 --> 01:22:24.960
pride. You know, and so like, let me let me say the same

1167
01:22:24.960 --> 01:22:31.360
thing two different ways. So how I said it on Friday is I said,

1168
01:22:31.720 --> 01:22:34.960
well, well, I believe that there's no, you know, the no

1169
01:22:34.960 --> 01:22:38.680
such thing as the 10 tribes of Israel. Because, you know, when

1170
01:22:38.680 --> 01:22:41.440
they split apart, when when, you know, Solomon died, and

1171
01:22:41.440 --> 01:22:44.360
Rehobroam broke them apart to the north and the south tribes

1172
01:22:44.360 --> 01:22:46.800
from, you know, all 12 different tribes, and when the pagans went

1173
01:22:46.800 --> 01:22:51.560
one way, the believers went went the other way. Okay, that's

1174
01:22:51.560 --> 01:22:57.200
pretty much how I said it, which I believe to be true. Wow,

1175
01:22:57.200 --> 01:23:00.760
that's really powerful. I would love to know how what you've

1176
01:23:00.760 --> 01:23:03.760
learned. So here's the second way. I'd love to know what

1177
01:23:03.760 --> 01:23:07.880
you've learned around that. You know, based on my study, I

1178
01:23:07.880 --> 01:23:10.120
didn't understand it the way that you do. I would love to

1179
01:23:10.160 --> 01:23:15.280
connect more on that and see and see where you get. And so now

1180
01:23:15.320 --> 01:23:22.960
I'm describing that particular conversation, right? There's a

1181
01:23:22.960 --> 01:23:27.920
part I believe it's in Ephesians. One of you may know

1182
01:23:27.920 --> 01:23:30.800
the exact location, but I believe it's in Ephesians where

1183
01:23:30.800 --> 01:23:36.000
it says, hey, if a brother is doing wrong, rebuke them. Right?

1184
01:23:36.360 --> 01:23:39.160
And if they don't listen, go get some people from the church and

1185
01:23:39.200 --> 01:23:45.400
go visit them, rebuke them. What people miss is and then if they

1186
01:23:45.400 --> 01:23:47.680
still won't listen, I think after you know, three different

1187
01:23:47.680 --> 01:23:54.080
times, you boot them out of the church. But what people forget

1188
01:23:54.080 --> 01:23:58.480
and they completely miss is it is love that brings them back to

1189
01:23:58.480 --> 01:24:03.600
the church. So as humans, we love to kick things out. We love

1190
01:24:03.600 --> 01:24:06.680
to rebuke, we love to judge, we love to shame, we're just

1191
01:24:06.680 --> 01:24:10.280
designed that way. It's awesome. But we're actually

1192
01:24:10.280 --> 01:24:14.440
called to love those not of the church. We're to love, not

1193
01:24:14.440 --> 01:24:20.160
rebuke. People miss that. They miss that because it's the love

1194
01:24:20.320 --> 01:24:25.160
that will draw them closer to Christ, not the rebuke. You

1195
01:24:25.160 --> 01:24:27.720
know, it's just like the, you know, look at COVID, right?

1196
01:24:27.720 --> 01:24:29.880
There are a lot of people, they had, you know, people had

1197
01:24:29.880 --> 01:24:35.320
different approaches. Some were shamers. How dare you walk in

1198
01:24:35.320 --> 01:24:40.040
Costco without a mask? How dare? So did that level of

1199
01:24:40.040 --> 01:24:46.560
connection increase mask? No, not at all. In fact, they

1200
01:24:46.560 --> 01:24:49.520
probably got the middle finger. Now they hate them even more,

1201
01:24:49.600 --> 01:24:55.320
right? It's division and that's what it is. And so it is so

1202
01:24:55.320 --> 01:24:59.960
easy. And I would argue most pastors.

1203
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:02.000
live in judgment and shame

1204
01:25:02.480 --> 01:25:04.480
Because that's what their congregation

1205
01:25:04.960 --> 01:25:06.440
desires and

1206
01:25:06.440 --> 01:25:09.860
I don't I don't know your particular instance. I'm not speaking on on that

1207
01:25:11.040 --> 01:25:16.340
On the pastor you mentioned but it is so different to be of love

1208
01:25:16.920 --> 01:25:19.220
It's just different and love is what attracts

1209
01:25:19.600 --> 01:25:25.360
That's what attracts people to get to want to know Christ more not judgment not shame not rebuke

1210
01:25:25.880 --> 01:25:29.400
Rebuke is okay. I run a men's Bible study

1211
01:25:30.000 --> 01:25:32.120
If I see one of my one of my bros

1212
01:25:32.840 --> 01:25:37.240
Saying, you know, hey, man, I'm seeing this chick on the side. I'm gonna say whoa, brother

1213
01:25:37.800 --> 01:25:42.680
Mmm, you shouldn't be doing that man. This is this is the path to destruction

1214
01:25:42.680 --> 01:25:47.600
I'm like, I'm gonna give him some Solomon Proverbs about the you know, right because he's a brother

1215
01:25:48.400 --> 01:25:49.400
and

1216
01:25:49.400 --> 01:25:56.120
And so but for me to connect with someone I barely know that is not of faith and wag my finger at them

1217
01:25:56.640 --> 01:26:00.360
One will never change them two will never have them come to Christ three

1218
01:26:01.440 --> 01:26:05.600
It's pointless. It's not good. And so this is a

1219
01:26:06.760 --> 01:26:10.520
very big conversation that that not enough people are having and

1220
01:26:11.200 --> 01:26:16.360
So, you know first Corinthians, you know 13, which a lot of people use, you know in their

1221
01:26:17.120 --> 01:26:19.960
Wedding vows and at weddings and things like that

1222
01:26:20.400 --> 01:26:24.520
But you know if we just I just want to read just just part of it here

1223
01:26:25.360 --> 01:26:27.360
If

1224
01:26:28.360 --> 01:26:35.520
I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love. I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal

1225
01:26:37.200 --> 01:26:39.200
Hey, you shouldn't be sinning

1226
01:26:41.360 --> 01:26:44.360
That's that's the clanging cymbal that doesn't change anybody

1227
01:26:44.600 --> 01:26:50.760
It just that's just the fact if I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge

1228
01:26:50.760 --> 01:26:53.880
And if I have a faith that can move mountains, but I do not have love

1229
01:26:53.880 --> 01:26:59.520
I am nothing if I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast

1230
01:26:59.760 --> 01:27:02.280
But do not have love I gain nothing

1231
01:27:03.160 --> 01:27:08.280
Love is paid. You've heard this love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud

1232
01:27:08.280 --> 01:27:12.600
It does not dishonor others. It is not self-seeking is not easily angered

1233
01:27:12.600 --> 01:27:17.000
It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth

1234
01:27:17.000 --> 01:27:24.240
It always protects always trust always hopes always perseveres. Love never fails that did it and goes, you know encourage, you know

1235
01:27:24.240 --> 01:27:26.240
Read in that but you can change

1236
01:27:26.920 --> 01:27:28.800
the word love

1237
01:27:28.800 --> 01:27:30.800
to I am

1238
01:27:31.440 --> 01:27:33.000
What if you did that

1239
01:27:33.000 --> 01:27:39.760
What if you said I am patient I am kind I don't envy I don't boast. I'm not proud

1240
01:27:39.760 --> 01:27:45.800
I don't dishonor others. I'm not self-seeking. I'm not easily angered. I keep no record of wrongs

1241
01:27:45.800 --> 01:27:48.760
I don't delight in evil. I rejoice with the truth

1242
01:27:48.760 --> 01:27:54.080
I always protect always trust always right and so it just starts to to change you and

1243
01:27:54.680 --> 01:27:58.960
There are so few examples of actual love in our society

1244
01:27:58.960 --> 01:28:06.480
It's hard to point you to many because you just you just don't see them but love is what brings people to different states

1245
01:28:07.480 --> 01:28:10.040
loving the person that is

1246
01:28:11.840 --> 01:28:13.160
Sinning

1247
01:28:13.160 --> 01:28:15.160
loving the person that

1248
01:28:16.200 --> 01:28:18.200
You know is doing the thing that's not biblical

1249
01:28:19.240 --> 01:28:25.640
Loving them has the opportunity to change them not chastising them not judging them not rebuking them

1250
01:28:25.840 --> 01:28:32.200
If they're not a believer if they're not of the faith you judging shaming them not gonna change them ever

1251
01:28:33.440 --> 01:28:35.440
that's the difficulty is

1252
01:28:36.080 --> 01:28:41.360
Who has knowledge but doesn't use it as a weapon on others who don't have knowledge

1253
01:28:42.280 --> 01:28:44.280
very rare person

1254
01:28:44.280 --> 01:28:48.160
That's that's my unpopular take on your question

1255
01:28:53.800 --> 01:28:55.800
Helpful hurtful

1256
01:28:57.600 --> 01:29:04.120
No, sorry myself so I don't have any interruptions while you're talking but no, yeah that is I I

1257
01:29:04.640 --> 01:29:07.080
Appreciate that response. I like your response

1258
01:29:08.000 --> 01:29:10.000
Yeah, thank you

1259
01:29:10.200 --> 01:29:15.120
Most like what I wish and I mentioned this to you know to my pastor

1260
01:29:15.720 --> 01:29:20.400
what I wish more pastors would do and my pastor he'll do this sometimes is

1261
01:29:21.760 --> 01:29:23.760
Hey, I'm gonna give you some truth

1262
01:29:24.640 --> 01:29:26.640
To you the believer

1263
01:29:27.440 --> 01:29:30.680
Don't use this truth to beat the crap out of others

1264
01:29:32.040 --> 01:29:35.440
you know like I had a guy come to my

1265
01:29:35.960 --> 01:29:42.880
Men's Bible study and we thoroughly we really dug into Ephesians 533 which talks about, you know

1266
01:29:42.880 --> 01:29:46.720
Wives respect your husband men. Love your wives, right?

1267
01:29:47.280 --> 01:29:48.560
and

1268
01:29:48.560 --> 01:29:54.960
You know, why are they different because men operate at their the highest desire for the man is to be respected

1269
01:29:55.400 --> 01:30:00.000
The highest desire of women's to be loved. That's why it's instructing. All right guys

1270
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:01.400
as instructing, right?

1271
01:30:01.400 --> 01:30:03.680
Men, love your wives.

1272
01:30:03.680 --> 01:30:04.880
I know that's difficult for you.

1273
01:30:04.880 --> 01:30:07.480
Women, respect your husbands whether they deserve it or not.

1274
01:30:07.480 --> 01:30:09.080
I know that's difficult for you, right?

1275
01:30:09.080 --> 01:30:10.480
So it's, you know, pointing.

1276
01:30:12.160 --> 01:30:16.200
And one of the guys in our neighborhood, his takeaway,

1277
01:30:16.200 --> 01:30:18.680
so I didn't, Ray didn't do a good job here.

1278
01:30:18.680 --> 01:30:20.360
His takeaway was he went home and said,

1279
01:30:20.360 --> 01:30:23.580
hey, Ray says you're supposed to respect me.

1280
01:30:26.760 --> 01:30:29.600
And the wife tells my wife, my wife tells me,

1281
01:30:29.600 --> 01:30:34.520
I'm like, oh, oh, that's so terrible.

1282
01:30:34.520 --> 01:30:39.520
So we have to, you know, like put multiple pillows

1283
01:30:39.960 --> 01:30:44.520
around truth and say, hey, just cause you understand this,

1284
01:30:44.520 --> 01:30:46.400
don't wield it as a weapon.

1285
01:30:46.400 --> 01:30:48.000
It's very similar to the love languages.

1286
01:30:48.000 --> 01:30:49.760
Some people learn their love language

1287
01:30:49.760 --> 01:30:52.160
just to beat up everyone around them on,

1288
01:30:52.160 --> 01:30:55.520
hey, you know I'm acts of service, service me, right?

1289
01:30:55.520 --> 01:30:57.760
And it's just like, okay, I don't think that's the point

1290
01:30:57.760 --> 01:30:59.200
of learning your love language.

1291
01:30:59.760 --> 01:31:01.520
That's terrible if that's the case

1292
01:31:01.520 --> 01:31:03.240
of shaming everybody else.

1293
01:31:03.240 --> 01:31:06.320
But that's what a lot of churches do.

1294
01:31:07.280 --> 01:31:11.680
And so very, very difficult to let me teach truth

1295
01:31:11.680 --> 01:31:13.760
but also add pillows to it.

1296
01:31:13.760 --> 01:31:18.280
So you don't take this truth and use it as a bat, right?

1297
01:31:18.280 --> 01:31:22.120
But instead use it as, let me have this knowledge

1298
01:31:22.120 --> 01:31:25.160
but remain in the state of love.

1299
01:31:25.160 --> 01:31:27.280
Let me have the knowledge, keep seeking knowledge,

1300
01:31:27.280 --> 01:31:30.240
but let me be of love.

1301
01:31:30.240 --> 01:31:35.000
And that's, if there's a more difficult thing,

1302
01:31:35.000 --> 01:31:36.720
I'm not sure I know what it is.

1303
01:31:39.360 --> 01:31:41.400
One of the, I've shared this before,

1304
01:31:41.400 --> 01:31:43.840
but you know, my wife, she's bananas

1305
01:31:43.840 --> 01:31:45.720
about near death experience stuff.

1306
01:31:45.720 --> 01:31:47.720
So she'll watch this stuff all the time.

1307
01:31:47.720 --> 01:31:52.280
And one of them I thought was really, really powerful.

1308
01:31:52.280 --> 01:31:57.040
And the guy, you know, dies on the operating table.

1309
01:31:57.800 --> 01:31:58.840
He describes different things.

1310
01:31:58.840 --> 01:32:00.960
Yeah, then they use this tool on me.

1311
01:32:00.960 --> 01:32:02.560
He shouldn't know what tool they used on him.

1312
01:32:02.560 --> 01:32:03.920
He was dead, right?

1313
01:32:03.920 --> 01:32:06.080
And so like, that's a very common thing

1314
01:32:06.080 --> 01:32:07.640
with near death experiences.

1315
01:32:07.640 --> 01:32:11.560
And he sees Jesus, right?

1316
01:32:11.560 --> 01:32:13.960
And Jesus says to him, he says,

1317
01:32:13.960 --> 01:32:18.000
so were you, you know, were you, are you someone of love?

1318
01:32:18.000 --> 01:32:19.960
And he's like, absolutely.

1319
01:32:19.960 --> 01:32:21.480
He goes, well, are you prejudiced?

1320
01:32:21.480 --> 01:32:23.240
He's not at all.

1321
01:32:24.200 --> 01:32:26.280
I'm not the least prejudiced person.

1322
01:32:26.320 --> 01:32:28.200
And he said, well, how do you feel about prejudiced people?

1323
01:32:28.200 --> 01:32:29.840
Oh, they're terrible.

1324
01:32:29.840 --> 01:32:31.440
Oh, I can't stand them.

1325
01:32:31.440 --> 01:32:32.760
They're the worst.

1326
01:32:34.920 --> 01:32:36.360
See, that's not of love.

1327
01:32:36.360 --> 01:32:39.120
We know prejudice is wrong, right?

1328
01:32:39.120 --> 01:32:40.320
We don't like that.

1329
01:32:41.880 --> 01:32:43.280
We're called to love them.

1330
01:32:44.320 --> 01:32:45.960
And we could pick a few other categories

1331
01:32:45.960 --> 01:32:47.920
that would be even more unlovable

1332
01:32:49.000 --> 01:32:51.080
than even someone prejudiced.

1333
01:32:52.120 --> 01:32:54.480
And we'd be very convicted to ask ourselves

1334
01:32:54.480 --> 01:32:55.880
if we could truly love them.

1335
01:32:56.920 --> 01:32:59.200
But that's what we're supposed to be

1336
01:32:59.200 --> 01:33:02.520
because we're called to love our enemies,

1337
01:33:02.520 --> 01:33:04.840
bless those who persecute you,

1338
01:33:04.840 --> 01:33:07.200
love those who hate you.

1339
01:33:07.200 --> 01:33:09.960
I mean, these are very clear things.

1340
01:33:09.960 --> 01:33:14.960
And, you know, the non-believer that, you know,

1341
01:33:15.720 --> 01:33:17.840
drinks too much, or the non-believer

1342
01:33:17.840 --> 01:33:19.240
that cheats on their wife,

1343
01:33:19.240 --> 01:33:22.200
or the non-believer that, you know,

1344
01:33:22.200 --> 01:33:23.680
believes in the law of attraction

1345
01:33:23.680 --> 01:33:26.760
or does yoga or whatever, right?

1346
01:33:26.760 --> 01:33:28.520
Well, if we're supposed to love our enemies,

1347
01:33:28.520 --> 01:33:30.720
we're supposed to love them too.

1348
01:33:30.720 --> 01:33:34.160
And so not easy, not easy.

1349
01:33:34.160 --> 01:33:37.160
And all right, Eileen.

1350
01:33:41.240 --> 01:33:44.320
I find it hard sometimes.

1351
01:33:44.320 --> 01:33:46.560
We went to a, yeah,

1352
01:33:46.560 --> 01:33:51.240
we went to a sex trafficking fundraiser the other night.

1353
01:33:51.240 --> 01:33:55.280
And it's really, really difficult

1354
01:33:55.280 --> 01:33:57.680
to love these people that are doing this.

1355
01:33:57.680 --> 01:33:58.520
Yeah.

1356
01:34:00.400 --> 01:34:02.560
How do we get beyond that?

1357
01:34:04.280 --> 01:34:06.840
The disdain and the disgust

1358
01:34:06.840 --> 01:34:11.200
and to love someone doing these things.

1359
01:34:11.200 --> 01:34:14.920
So you need to understand,

1360
01:34:16.080 --> 01:34:17.320
I don't know the exact location,

1361
01:34:17.320 --> 01:34:19.480
but I think it's Ephesians six, right?

1362
01:34:21.640 --> 01:34:24.160
I think it's Ephesians six, isn't it?

1363
01:34:24.160 --> 01:34:27.400
Oh, our struggle is not against flesh and blood,

1364
01:34:27.400 --> 01:34:28.960
but against the rulers, against the authorities,

1365
01:34:28.960 --> 01:34:30.520
against the powers of this dark world

1366
01:34:30.520 --> 01:34:31.920
and against the spiritual forces of evil

1367
01:34:31.920 --> 01:34:33.960
and the heavenly realms, okay?

1368
01:34:33.960 --> 01:34:36.840
So Ephesians 6, 12, I should've, I thought it was that.

1369
01:34:36.840 --> 01:34:41.840
For our struggle is not against the trafficker.

1370
01:34:42.840 --> 01:34:44.840
As weird as that sounds.

1371
01:34:44.840 --> 01:34:47.200
Our struggle is not, I'm gonna say it a different way,

1372
01:34:47.200 --> 01:34:50.400
our struggle is not against the trafficker.

1373
01:34:50.560 --> 01:34:52.440
I'm gonna say it a different way.

1374
01:34:52.440 --> 01:34:54.880
You won't like this way either.

1375
01:34:54.880 --> 01:34:57.120
Our struggle is not against the child of God.

1376
01:34:58.520 --> 01:35:00.560
I know that's hard, that's hard to think.

1377
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:08.560
It's against the rulers a theoretic the authorities the powers of this dark world against the spiritual force of evil in the heavenly realms

1378
01:35:09.040 --> 01:35:12.740
So that is that is what it means to hate the sin

1379
01:35:13.560 --> 01:35:15.560
love the sinner and

1380
01:35:16.040 --> 01:35:19.720
I can't you know, I wasn't even going there but

1381
01:35:20.720 --> 01:35:26.880
That is the that has to I mean for me it has to be the hardest type of person to love

1382
01:35:27.720 --> 01:35:29.720
But what will ever change them?

1383
01:35:30.000 --> 01:35:32.000
And we are not to judge

1384
01:35:32.080 --> 01:35:34.320
You know, some people are quick. Oh, they're going to hell

1385
01:35:35.160 --> 01:35:37.480
Let let my lips never say that ever

1386
01:35:38.600 --> 01:35:40.600
Because I'm not God. I

1387
01:35:41.400 --> 01:35:48.280
Don't have that jurisdiction. I don't have that wisdom. I believe in a God that can take someone like

1388
01:35:48.920 --> 01:35:50.680
Saul of Taurus

1389
01:35:50.680 --> 01:35:57.440
Who was killing Christians and sanctioning the killing of Christians and make him the most prolific writer of the Bible in the New Testament?

1390
01:35:57.440 --> 01:35:58.880
at least I

1391
01:35:58.880 --> 01:36:02.720
believe in a God that's so powerful that he can take the

1392
01:36:05.160 --> 01:36:11.320
Horrible horrible sins that people have committed and and make them actually warriors for him

1393
01:36:12.800 --> 01:36:16.400
Because that's what I'm called to do and it's not easy

1394
01:36:17.680 --> 01:36:19.680
but is you know

1395
01:36:21.040 --> 01:36:26.360
It's not easy I never said it was easy but that biblically is what we're supposed to do and

1396
01:36:27.240 --> 01:36:29.000
That

1397
01:36:29.000 --> 01:36:31.000
Not easy. I

1398
01:36:31.240 --> 01:36:33.000
remember, you know watching

1399
01:36:33.000 --> 01:36:35.720
father of lights, I think yeah father of lights and

1400
01:36:36.840 --> 01:36:44.040
They have they're at Venice Beach, California and these people are marching down the road and they're saying repent

1401
01:36:44.040 --> 01:36:45.880
We're gonna burn in hell

1402
01:36:45.880 --> 01:36:47.280
right, and

1403
01:36:47.280 --> 01:36:54.480
There's even a little kid. He's like no gays. You're making it into heaven and I see that and I'm just like, ah,

1404
01:36:55.360 --> 01:36:57.560
That's a I don't like that message

1405
01:36:58.360 --> 01:37:04.240
Don't like that. That's that's your marketing message and they talk to a guy and they're like, hey, how long you been doing this?

1406
01:37:04.240 --> 01:37:06.240
He's like I've been down here for 30 years

1407
01:37:08.160 --> 01:37:12.200
How many people have you brought to Christ well, I haven't brought anyone

1408
01:37:14.480 --> 01:37:16.480
But some of my buddies have

1409
01:37:18.200 --> 01:37:20.200
30 years

1410
01:37:20.960 --> 01:37:23.960
Marching on a very populated Street

1411
01:37:25.080 --> 01:37:30.840
Hasn't brought one person to Christ. Surely there's a different way. It's gotta be a different way

1412
01:37:32.200 --> 01:37:39.280
It's gotta be a different way. I don't I don't think God is ordaining that so I found it in my spare

1413
01:37:39.280 --> 01:37:41.280
I'm like, oh man these guys

1414
01:37:41.320 --> 01:37:44.320
Judgment shame whatever and you know what they did in the movie

1415
01:37:45.000 --> 01:37:48.960
They went and they said brother you man you work so hard man

1416
01:37:49.280 --> 01:37:53.200
You're out here in the hot Sun and you're you know, you're doing you know

1417
01:37:53.200 --> 01:37:57.240
You're trying your very best to help people get to work. No the word of word of Lord

1418
01:37:57.240 --> 01:38:00.240
Man, can we pray for you? And they they loved them

1419
01:38:01.360 --> 01:38:03.360
And that really convicted me

1420
01:38:03.400 --> 01:38:05.400
Because I didn't

1421
01:38:05.440 --> 01:38:07.440
That was gross

1422
01:38:07.440 --> 01:38:12.120
To just publicly shame people and I just I knew the tactic wouldn't work just as a marketer, right?

1423
01:38:12.120 --> 01:38:13.880
But I but I didn't love them

1424
01:38:13.880 --> 01:38:19.160
So I was I got to check my spirit there because I'm called to love them. They're a child of God

1425
01:38:20.280 --> 01:38:23.840
They may not be they may not have it figured out. They may be doing it the wrong way

1426
01:38:25.200 --> 01:38:27.760
But how many times in my life did I not have it figured out?

1427
01:38:28.800 --> 01:38:32.120
God rescued me from an eternity in hell

1428
01:38:33.040 --> 01:38:35.560
When I sat in a bathtub and tried to kill myself

1429
01:38:37.560 --> 01:38:39.560
I was gonna spend eternity in hell

1430
01:38:39.560 --> 01:38:45.920
If he can save me he can save everyone I I can I can lock eyes with he's the God of miracles. I

1431
01:38:46.680 --> 01:38:51.520
Have to believe more in his God than my conviction on what's wrong with other people

1432
01:38:52.880 --> 01:38:57.360
Unpopular opinion not easy. Do I have a perfect definitely not?

1433
01:38:58.640 --> 01:39:00.640
They definitely don't

1434
01:39:01.160 --> 01:39:05.480
But I'm striving. I'm what next, you know remain in the kingdom and

1435
01:39:05.480 --> 01:39:07.480
That person of

1436
01:39:09.560 --> 01:39:11.880
Great sin if you want to call it that

1437
01:39:14.040 --> 01:39:18.520
One don't know more about Christ that's my hope is to be the light

1438
01:39:21.560 --> 01:39:25.960
You've been in my best shot it's tough now you're right absolutely, right

1439
01:39:26.760 --> 01:39:29.800
Okay, what are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing?

1440
01:39:30.320 --> 01:39:32.320
You're waving, okay

1441
01:39:33.920 --> 01:39:39.720
Do you mind if I jump in real quick? Oh, yeah. Oh, okay. I'm waving because I want to say something to Eileen

1442
01:39:39.720 --> 01:39:47.520
Um, I'm just prompted to share this Eileen Eileen, you know the story of the person that attacked my husband. Mmm

1443
01:39:48.440 --> 01:39:52.600
Good story, and you know and and for the rest of us

1444
01:39:52.600 --> 01:39:56.640
I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean

1445
01:39:57.080 --> 01:39:59.080
So I don't know what to do

1446
01:39:59.440 --> 01:40:00.960
But then I heard the word

1447
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:04.140
you. My husband was a police officer for 29 years, well, 30

1448
01:40:00.960 --> 01:40:02.820
My friend

1449
01:40:02.820 --> 01:40:03.820
and Michael

1450
01:40:03.820 --> 01:40:08.360
Then I went and he called me and that

1451
01:40:04.140 --> 01:40:08.020
ultimately, but 29 years when he was attacked by somebody who

1452
01:40:08.020 --> 01:40:14.340
tried to run him over as he was dealing with a traffic violation

1453
01:40:08.740 --> 01:40:11.860
I'll let him you know I'm not sure if this will happen

1454
01:40:11.860 --> 01:40:15.200
But my head is shaking from the

1455
01:40:14.340 --> 01:40:20.940
on the side of the road. So, Eileen, I cannot tell you how

1456
01:40:15.420 --> 01:40:17.440
Shouts, because this is going to be bad

1457
01:40:17.440 --> 01:40:19.520
I don't know what you mean did you get hit from your face?

1458
01:40:19.680 --> 01:40:22.160
What did you say my son?

1459
01:40:20.940 --> 01:40:28.020
many times I prayed to forgive that man. Through multiple

1460
01:40:28.020 --> 01:40:30.920
trials, as you know, you know the whole story. Through

1461
01:40:30.920 --> 01:40:34.360
multiple trials, through multiple things, I turned to

1462
01:40:34.360 --> 01:40:39.000
Ray, I said, I cannot, I am not finding it in myself to forgive

1463
01:40:39.000 --> 01:40:42.640
this man. And ultimately, and Ray was very helpful in telling

1464
01:40:42.640 --> 01:40:45.320
me, you know, just keep praying for forgiveness, you know,

1465
01:40:45.360 --> 01:40:49.620
praying to be able to do that. And every time I would pray, I

1466
01:40:49.620 --> 01:40:53.640
would get the same thing. He's evil personified. This man is

1467
01:40:53.680 --> 01:40:57.400
evil personified. And I was like, yes, yes, he is, isn't he?

1468
01:40:58.480 --> 01:41:01.920
And, and I would pray some more where how can I forgive him? How

1469
01:41:01.920 --> 01:41:04.880
can I forgive him? How can I forgive him? And God kept

1470
01:41:04.880 --> 01:41:09.880
saying to me, he is evil personified. And it finally

1471
01:41:09.960 --> 01:41:17.040
clicked with me. He is evil personified. He's not the evil

1472
01:41:17.040 --> 01:41:22.840
one. He's evil personified. And I had to separate that to be

1473
01:41:22.840 --> 01:41:28.000
able to forgive him. He is evil personified. And God had told

1474
01:41:28.020 --> 01:41:35.020
me that probably hundreds of times until I finally got it. It

1475
01:41:35.020 --> 01:41:39.980
finally clicked for me. What we see, and what we condemn and

1476
01:41:39.980 --> 01:41:44.300
what we have a hard time forgiving is not of the person

1477
01:41:44.340 --> 01:41:45.780
it is of evil.

1478
01:41:47.260 --> 01:41:51.700
Powerful. I hope that that and that's a fusion 612. You're not

1479
01:41:51.700 --> 01:41:53.380
wrestling against the flesh. You're not wrestling against

1480
01:41:53.380 --> 01:41:59.400
him. Okay, I'm Lisa, and then we'll probably wrap up guys.

1481
01:42:00.720 --> 01:42:07.640
I just wanted to say thank you, Ray. Um, I my move to Florida,

1482
01:42:07.640 --> 01:42:11.960
I've been here for about a week. I'm starting to settle in. But

1483
01:42:11.960 --> 01:42:18.200
just your conversation about love. Because God's been

1484
01:42:18.200 --> 01:42:23.420
telling me and guiding me with love and just hearing you. And

1485
01:42:23.420 --> 01:42:31.580
you're so I'm so thankful to be part of this. And I want to

1486
01:42:31.580 --> 01:42:35.580
connect closer to God like you have. And I've been a Christian

1487
01:42:35.580 --> 01:42:41.740
for about 20 years. And I'm I'm really excited to just let the

1488
01:42:41.740 --> 01:42:50.120
wall down. Yeah. And just go out and be and love. Yeah. And

1489
01:42:50.120 --> 01:42:54.520
see who I can meet and how many friends I can make and just love

1490
01:42:54.520 --> 01:42:58.720
on people and not worry about money. Don't worry about stuff.

1491
01:42:59.840 --> 01:43:03.840
And just care about people. So thank you. Yeah.

1492
01:43:04.960 --> 01:43:10.000
Yeah, for sure. Book suggestion for you guys. It's a short one.

1493
01:43:10.220 --> 01:43:13.900
But it's what really helped me with my breakthrough this this

1494
01:43:13.900 --> 01:43:20.620
week. It's called the nature of freedom. The nature is short. I

1495
01:43:20.620 --> 01:43:24.780
read it in two days, and not a full two days, nature of

1496
01:43:24.780 --> 01:43:31.000
freedom, by Graham cook. And Graham, he also wrote crafted

1497
01:43:31.000 --> 01:43:34.500
prayer, which I recommend. But nature of freedom by Graham

1498
01:43:34.500 --> 01:43:40.480
cook. It really challenged me when I first like, I was

1499
01:43:40.480 --> 01:43:44.840
different. When I first started reading my and where I was

1500
01:43:44.840 --> 01:43:47.600
challenged to by the time I finished, I was a different

1501
01:43:47.600 --> 01:43:52.080
person. And and so I hope that you have a similar experience or

1502
01:43:52.080 --> 01:43:57.640
even greater. But Graham cook nature of freedom. Oh, love you

1503
01:43:57.640 --> 01:44:02.400
guys so much. So proud of you guys for showing up. And we're

1504
01:44:02.400 --> 01:44:04.820
here. You know, if we can help you don't have to wait, by the

1505
01:44:04.820 --> 01:44:07.380
way, you don't have to wait for our monthly calls or whatever.

1506
01:44:07.700 --> 01:44:10.460
Hit us up on boxer if we can help you in any way we love you.

1507
01:44:10.620 --> 01:44:13.660
All right. Bye, guys. See you.