so honored and excited.
This is our very first meeting together
and I want you to know that I'm pretty selective
on which groups that I dedicate my time to
and I'll explain that here in a little bit
because we're gonna talk about that today
and how that lesson plays into your lives,
especially around the holidays
and when you're prioritizing
what is going to get you the most leverage
and what's gonna help you be with your families
and also have some balance.
So we're gonna talk about that
but I'm really selective on the groups
that I dedicate my time to
and when Ray and Dion forged this vision
because these masterminds and these groups
we don't just create these for us at all.
In fact, these groups are really a community
coming together to create a bigger vision together
that will go out and impact the world
in whatever way that you're looking to do that
and so when Ray and Dion forged this group
and then asked me to be a part of it,
I prayed about it,
I dug into what was gonna be discussed here,
I dug into after the event,
I dug into who was a part of it
and have been following you guys
and watching what you're doing
and I'm really, really excited
because I feel in my spirit that there is something big
that's going to be formed from this group,
really, really big,
possibly the biggest that has ever been formed
from any group we've ever had
and we've had some incredible groups.
So all that to say that I'm excited,
I'm sure some of you feel that too
and remember that you have each other,
you don't just have me,
you don't just have Ray,
you don't just have Dion,
you have each other
and there's some very high powerful people,
high go-getters, high faith-getters in this group
and so leverage each other.
If you're struggling with something,
of course, reach out to us
but also utilize each other
and if you're struggling with something,
ask for prayer from another faith and finance master,
my member, let's come together as a community
and really create something absolutely amazing.
So when I come into these meetings,
I, of course, pray on what to share
and like I said, I've been following a lot of you
and the one word that kept coming up
over and over again was sacrifice
and I don't know who that resonates with
but I think that there's a very positive shift happening
in our world and in our culture specifically.
I know not all of you are Americans
but as an American in our culture specifically,
there's a very positive shift happening
where people are realizing
that the gravy train doesn't last forever
and that you're gonna have ups, you're gonna have downs,
you're gonna have trials, you're gonna have tribulations,
you're also gonna have mountains, massive mountains
and you're gonna have valleys
and sometimes those valleys are massive valleys
and how does sacrifice play into your growth?
How does it play into your role here on earth?
I like how one of our pastors speaks about our bodies,
she calls it an earth suit
and so how does your sacrifice here
relate to this earth suit
and what you're meant to do here
and are you completely dismissing sacrifice
as something that doesn't need to happen
or isn't something that is essentially required
to get to where you wanna be
because one thing that God values greatly
is endurance and persistence
and breeding that endurance within you
and growing that within you
and so sacrifice kept coming up over and over again
and so if I look at our life, Ray and I's life
and I am gonna open this up of course for,
this is a mastermind,
this is a participant-based meeting
so I am gonna open this up for discussion,
for questions, for just concerns,
anything that you wanna talk about
regarding your personal or business life
but since this is a finance, faith and finance,
uh, mentorship program, I want to talk about specifically the
sacrifice that you're making towards your financial goals as
well. Um, not just your, your spiritual goals, but your
financial goals. And for years, for years, I looked at sacrifice
as a four letter word. I looked at struggle. I looked at, um, um,
I guess even endurance, I looked at it as a four letter word of
something that I didn't require because I just go, go, go, go,
go. And there's no need for that in my life. And at the end of
the day, you know, we all need to learn to push through and
create that growth as, as I mentioned. So specifically,
financially, there's a couple of different areas where sacrifice
plays a role. I'll just wait for a second while Ray's banging
around.
Sorry.
They can't hear. Okay, good. Um,
we've, we've created and social media is such a blessing, and
it's also can be such a curse at the same time. I think, I think
you guys know what I'm talking about. Um, we've created a
society and a system where we're trying to, we're trying to
create a society and a system where we need more, we need
more, we need more, we need more, and not only more money,
but more leads. We feel like we need 1000s of leads a month,
just to create a sustainable business or hundreds, depending
on on where you're at in your business. And while more leads
is not a bad thing, it's actually an amazing, beautiful
thing. How we steward those leads, and the sacrifice that we
do to steward those leads that come in, is way more important.
Now hear me out here, it's way more important than the amount
of leads coming in. And so I remember a time when you know, I
would get like 10 leads a month and just keep following up, keep
working them, keep keep talking to them, keep fostering those
relationships. And that grew into a into a significant
income. Now, was it a seven figure income? No. But it grew
into a significant income to the point where I started to
feel more comfortable and more confident in building my
business. And so sacrifice isn't just applied to personally, what
time are you willing to sacrifice and things like that?
It's also business wise, how are you willing to sacrifice your
nature? How are you willing to sacrifice fun? How are you
willing to sacrifice doing the thing that you want to do versus
the thing that you need to do, to really start moving forward
in in your business and creating those financial goals. And step
one is really I don't know, who has this? Does? Does everybody
have our progress plan or have a some form of a calendar, or
something that they can use? See, just like raise your hand
if you have this. I just want to see who has this. Oh, wow.
Okay, awesome. I'm going to have our team send this out to you
guys. This is our progress planner. It's not dated. It's
it's an incredible tool. But I'm going to have our team send this
out to you guys. So be on the lookout for that. So the
absolute first step to getting anywhere in where you want to be
and getting anywhere in your goals, especially financially is
knowing where you're at. And so few of us want to stare in the
face where we're at, whether we're making millions of
dollars, or we're struggling to pay the electric bill. So few of
us want to stare in the face where we're at and and what's
going on in our lives. Especially financially, I find
I can speak to you from experience, you know, I, even
when we were making millions of dollars, I would struggle to
check the credit card bills. Every time I check the credit
card bills, my heart would raise my my hands would get sweaty. I
would I would feel this anxiety of like, oh, it's not in my
stomach, like I'm doing something wrong. And this all
stemmed from from childhood. And that I used to wake up in the
middle of the night to my mom on the phone with creditors in
the middle of the night trying to figure out her bills. And it
would create so much anxiety in me that it was a trigger. So you
have to know where you're at. And I would highly suggest even
maybe as soon as we get off of this meeting, or you find time
this week before the Christmas craziness, the Christmas craze
and especially if you have young kids, it's always,
or grandkids, it's always absolute mayhem.
I would absolutely schedule time in your planner,
in your calendar to figure out
where are you in your financial journey?
Exactly where are you at?
And so here's some things to track.
One, what are the absolute bare minimum
personal expenses you need to meet, right?
This is your mortgage, your groceries, your car,
your electric bill, all the things, your utilities.
These are all the things you need
to live the current lifestyle that you're living, okay?
And then from there, you go into,
okay, what investments do I make into my business?
Do you have, are you an entrepreneur?
Do you have employees?
Do you have contractors?
Are you spending marketing dollars?
You can input coaching dollars.
These are investments to grow your business.
In another column, you put,
okay, these are the current expenses of my business.
So not the growth portion,
but these are the current expenses of my business.
So this is what I, bare minimum,
that I need to run my business.
Now, for some of you,
if you're in a network marketing company,
it's a few hundred dollars a month, right?
And maybe some travel money set aside
for events and things like that.
It's not significant,
which is one of the amazing things about network marketing,
as I know you all know.
So, but write that down.
Every little bit counts.
And then when you get all of the categories,
for all of you, this is gonna be very different
and very across the board,
especially depending on where you live in the country,
right?
Because your mortgage in Florida
is gonna be very different than your mortgage in Wisconsin.
When you get all of these bare minimums written down,
then you create like a goals bucket of,
okay, this is ideally what extras,
what fun, what travel, what things,
how much do I wanna create per month?
That will be my extras, okay?
And that's your ultimate goal.
That could be a retirement goal.
It could be a residual income goal,
is to get all the bare minimums covered.
Plus we want a joyous, fulfilled, peaceful,
all the fruit of the spirit life
so that we can pour into and give to others.
I mean, that's really what it comes down to.
Because if we're just meeting the bare minimum,
if we're just meeting the bare minimum,
we don't have anything to give.
We don't have any finances to give.
We don't have any breathing room,
any heart to give, any volunteer hours to give
because we're just trying to make ends meet.
And that is definitely not the ultimate goal.
And biblically, that's not the ultimate goal.
So I really, really encourage you this week
to set aside time to go through those different buckets.
And then when you have each of those buckets,
I want you to pray.
Let's say you have five buckets.
I want you to pray on each and every one of those
and ask God, where am I not sacrificing enough?
Where could I put more sacrifice to you, Lord,
into each of these buckets?
And this can look very, very different.
So I don't want you to, again,
I do not want you to think of sacrifice
as a four-letter word.
I don't want you to think of it as something bad.
It actually is a beautiful thing
that God comes alongside us with
and helps us grow so amazingly
that we can enjoy the sacrifice.
Did you know that you can enjoy suffering?
You can.
I know that's kind of an oxymoron
because suffering in and of itself means being miserable.
But sacrifice and suffering,
I guess I said that wrong, sacrifice.
So sacrifice and suffering are two very different things.
So you can enjoy the sacrifice.
You can be at peace with it and actually,
and learn through it, as we all know.
But pray on where am I not sacrificing enough?
And so an example could be,
you're not giving enough of your heart to these leads.
You're not sacrificing enough of your time
in this busy work to go over here
and focus on really nurturing these people
and seeing what they need.
You need to sacrifice more over here
so that you can really focus in on people over here.
It could be, you know what?
spending way too much money on coffee, make your coffee at home, right?
Make your coffee at home.
Some of you will save hundreds of dollars a month this way.
No question. No question. Some of you already have this dialed in,
but praying on where God wants you to really hone in on the
sacrifice to massively explode, uh,
your 2025 without this portion.
And this is what most people miss without this portion.
There is no success because if you reach success without any form of
sacrifice or very little sacrifice,
there is no way that you are going to feel as fulfilled.
And there is no way that you are going to help people who are in the bottom of
the pit that need to be brought up and lifted up.
And that is not what you're about. That's not what I'm about.
And that's not what this group is about.
We're about helping people from wherever they're at to come out of the bottom of
the pit. And that may be you, you may be in the bottom of the pit. And this,
this exercise will absolutely help you to see the blind spots,
the spots where you're, you're completely missing it. Sacrifice could be,
um, you know what, you're, you're treating your children too much as a God.
You're treating your children too much as idols.
You actually need to sacrifice some time to focus on
the overall goal that you're building, show them by example,
lead them by example, so that when they're older,
you can create all of these experiences with them, right?
For some of you, myself included, that's an absolute boundary.
So I'm willing to sacrifice right now while the children are little until
you know, three 30, when they're out of school.
And then that time is flexible because that's where I give myself
grace because that's my kid time.
Now when they're at an age where they don't want to spend time with me,
when they're, you know, out and about and,
and teenagers and they're driving me crazy and all the things, right.
And they just want to go, go, go. My business will look differently,
but that's a boundary that I've set around sacrifice that I know may cost me
in my business,
but I literally don't care because I know that's where I'm being called right
now. And I know that on this earth, in my earth suit,
I will never get that time back with them ever.
And so it's a sacrifice there. I sacrifice one,
my business side to, to uplift my personal side.
It's a sacrifice and a boundary that I'm willing to create.
So these sacrifices look very different and they're beautiful things.
And a lot of them show up personally.
And a lot of them show up financially when you actually pray it out,
when you pray through it, there's places in your life, there's,
there's projects you need to let go.
There's expenses that you need to let go and sacrifice.
There's activities and even possibly
joyous extracurriculars that you need to let go right now to,
to move you along the path that God has for you.
And then he'll give those back to you tenfold,
but he will not provide that tenfold without the sacrifice or at least the
willingness to sacrifice those things that he wants you to,
because he knows what's going to grow you the most. So make sure that you,
you schedule this in your, in your calendars. Again, I'm going to,
I'm going to have our team send out one of these to each of you.
It's an early Christmas gift. Hopefully they get, get there before Christmas.
So that you have that. And, and I just want to open it up right now.
I've talked for the first 20 minutes here.
I just want to open it up right now to questions either around this or around
anything that you have going on in your business or in your
personal life that you'd like to share and, and just see,
or just a share doesn't have to be a question,
but just see if anybody has anything they'd like to, to speak on today.
Cause this is not my show. This is our show. And I want to hear from you guys.
I just want to say thank you. And this completely resonates because I've been
looking at the year ahead and what it's going to
take. And I had a lot of travel this year and I had a lot of fun this year.
And I was actually thinking yesterday, like I'm not planning travel.
I'm not doing any of that stuff.
I'm going to focus solely on being in this mastermind and give my full self to
it.
Because it's time and it's what I'm being called into.
So distractions need to be put aside for sure.
Absolutely. I love that. Thank you for sharing. Sacrificing travel.
Um, right now that's, that's a big one that, that hits multiple buckets.
Right.
Um, financially too, that's a huge expense and, you know, I'm not, if
your cashflow is, is incredibly lucrative by all means, don't, don't
sacrifice where you don't need to in this moment, I'm just saying, pray
about it and wherever God has you sacrifice, um, you know, do that.
It's a lot of times it'll be where, where we really don't want to.
And a lot of times it'll be, yeah, that doesn't really move the
needle for me personally and my fulfillment.
It doesn't move the needle for my business.
I don't know why I'm doing it.
It's something I've always done and that's why I keep doing it.
And I need to cut that tie immediately to whatever that is.
So thank you for sharing that.
Who else has something that's on their heart that they'd like to share?
I know that this group is not this quiet.
I mean, I could share it.
I can always share, um, sacrifices, man.
There's, there's a lot that went through my mind.
Like, um, when you go from my dead broke to like making money out of nowhere,
even though it wasn't out of nowhere, you kind of do, do like take
advantage of it a little bit.
Right.
So like we go out to eat a lot.
Um, and we just actually talked about this last night.
We're like, you know, we don't need to be doing that.
So we have, we can eat at home.
And then if we eat at home, we actually could spend more time
with our family, right together.
So, um, that was definitely on my mind and like, um, I don't know, like a lot of,
a lot of sacrifices, like a lot of it was more personal for me, like with my
daughter, like, um, I mean, I had to just tick tock a video on how to talk to her.
Cause she, you know, and it was like some really deep psychology stuff.
Like I asked her a few questions and like, basically she's, she's a very
passionate person, like most of us, I think, whatever we say in our head, we
believe like that's who become.
Right.
So I asked her a few questions to see how she really looks at herself.
And I'm like, that's like your reality, all that stuff becomes your reality.
Right.
So, um, but anyway, so I want to sacrifice, um, my ego sometimes of
being like, parents are always right.
You know, I think that's a huge one.
I don't, I don't know.
That's so hard for me because like, you know, do what we say type of thing, but
like, yeah, so that's where I'm at right now, like sacrificing your ego.
That's just, that's huge, huge.
And, and when, when you look at that perspective, I'm so glad you, you
mentioned that because when you look at that perspective, that, that literally
encompasses most things that keeps us up at night, because at the end of the
day, most of us, whether we want to admit it or not, we try our best to not be of
this nature, but whether we want to admit it or not, most of us care a lot
about what other people think.
And when you are worried about certain things in your life, like, oh, I'm not
getting to this next level of my business or, um, my kids aren't acting a certain
way, uh, how am I going to pay this bill next month?
What, what am I going to do here?
When you worry about that stuff, it's also because you're worried
about what people will think.
And that's a total ego.
I'm having a, I'm about to have a, like, um, huge breakthrough type thing.
So since you said that, Jessica, so, um, you know, my, um, who I serve and,
and what proud myself is like the help and the dad that's become dad.
Sometimes I beat myself up.
Like I'm not the best dad.
How can I teach people to be a better dad if I screw up?
You know what I mean?
So that's like, so that just hit me even harder where I'm like, sometimes
it prevents me from like, I feel like a fraud sharing dad tips on the internet
sometimes, because I slip up sometimes I'll be honest, because you go back
to your, like how you were raised.
Right.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
Oh, that was deep.
Powerful.
And we all screw up.
We all screw up, um, being a parent.
It's impossible not to.
So just keep that in mind.
Uh, you, you can't worry about what other people are going to think as you, as you
go along that journey, um, because it'll keep you from everything.
You know, when I first went into real estate, I was so worried what our community.
would think. Are they going to think this? Are they going to think that? Are they going
to think that, you know, um, Ray and I are having problems and some of them did and it's
okay. Uh, but overwhelmingly the response was positive. So I just, and that freedom
that's created when you move through where God has called you without that fear, without
that, when you sacrifice that ego, as you so beautifully put it, when that freedom is
created, you can, you feel like you can do anything because you've done it before. And
that's really what God's trying to get us to do. Um, you know, if you're in a tough
spot financially, let's say, and some of you are, some of you are in incredible financial
positions. Um, but if you're in a tough spot financially, God is moving you through that
so that that fear is removed and that freedom can come through. Uh, because you cannot,
if you don't have that happen to you where you've been at the bottom, you, you can, you're
always going to be afraid of it. You're always going to be afraid of it happening. Once you
move through it and you know that you can handle it, whatever that circumstance is,
and you know that God is by your side and he's got your back. Once you move through
that circumstance, it becomes so much easier to handle it. If it happens again, that that
fear is completely removed from you. Absolutely removed. For example, I had a, um, I had a
real estate transaction that went South and I knew from the beginning that I should not
work with these people. I knew it. And I let my ego get in the way. And I, I, it was a
large transaction. So I said, you know what, I'm sure it's going to be fine. And all the
while God was like, no, no, no. My gut was telling me don't work with them. Don't do
this. And it ended up going South and I ended up being sued. Now I got through it because
I ultimately didn't do anything. Um, but when, when you've never been sued personally, it's
different when you've been sued, you know, business wise, but when you've never been
sued personally and something like that happens, uh, it, it freaks you out. For those of you
who have been sued or in the legal system, it's not fun. I mean, you had, you get subpoenaed
for documents and, and it's, it's a long arduous process, but going, I'm so grateful that I
was taken through that process and came out on the other side, perfectly fine, better
than fine, because I now know how that works. And I, I know not to be scared of that anymore.
Um, people are going to do that. People are going to sue you. And the more, the bigger
that you get, I don't care what business it is, even in network marketing, the bigger
that you get, the more people believe that they can take, um, the more people that you
work with on a day-to-day basis, nine times out of 10, you're going to get sued. And so
if you're not taken through that process of, of how that works, how are you going to handle
that? You're going to stay small. The bigger that you get, you're going to need to get
your finances in order because it's not going to be a gravy train forever. They're going
to have ebbs and flows and ups and downs and, and it comes back, you know, but you need
to get your finances in order. And if you operate on a just go, go, go, go basis without
really honing in on what are these buckets? Where are they going to, where are they going
to lay? Um, it can all come collapsing down on you and God wants you to steward that properly.
And so for you who has had more success than you've ever had in your lifetime, it's very
important for you to sit down with your wife and future baby and your family, even, um,
sit down with them and go through, okay, what buckets are we really going to focus on? Where
do we need to sacrifice more? And how are we going to provide for our future? Um, with,
with this stewardship. And that doesn't mean that you don't rely on God for, for money.
Um, sometimes when people, I've heard a lot of Christians talk about how there's, and
it's just crazy to me how there's no need to plan for the future because God is your
absolutely true. God is your provider. However, he's not going to give you more. He's not
going to provide you with more if you don't know how to steward it properly. And it doesn't
mean that you hoard your money and you just save it and keep it, you know, for a rainy
day necessarily, but it does mean that you steward it properly. So when he calls you
to do something with it, you have it available. And maybe he calls you to provide an education
for your son or daughter. Maybe he calls you to, uh, donate to this charity. Maybe he calls
you to buy a larger home so that you can entertain and bring
people into that home and create a safe space of fellowship and evangelism and all of the
things, right?
But he's never, and I actually had this conversation with Ray a few years ago, and we talked through
this and prayed through this as a couple.
He's never going to provide more talents if you don't start stewarding the ones that you
have properly.
And we hear that in the parable, right?
So the minute that you start putting away, and this is part of the sacrifice, the minute
that you start putting away whatever income that you have, whether it's $100 a week or
a million dollars a month, the moment you start putting that aside in a bucket, and
this is God's bucket, or whatever you pray through in that exercise and God tells you
to label it as or where he wants you to shift around things and put that sacrifice in,
the moment you do that, the heavens open, and it's a really amazing, beautiful thing,
and start providing opportunity to grow that portion.
So if you're making $100 a week in your business right now, take $10 a week and put it into
a bucket, just put it into a separate bucket.
Sacrifice that cup of coffee, sacrifice that whatever, that night out, and put it into
a bucket.
You will be so amazed at what happens when you start doing that.
And so Ray and I have several buckets, and one of them is a giving account.
So I'm sure he's talked with you about this, so forgive me if it's repetitive, but we have
a giving account that we put money into there, and then we have an investment account, and
we pray on each of those buckets of where is that going.
And that's based on sales, it's not based on profit, and I'm not telling you how to
do that because that's something you have to pray through, but we really love the David
Green model, where he bases it off of his sales.
And so this is just a really powerful, simple exercise that 90% of people do not do.
They just don't sit down and take the time and put it in their planner to go through,
here are, this is where we're at, this is where we want to be, and let's pray through
how we can get there, where we can sacrifice more to God, where we can actually have a
little more abundance, where we can pour more of our time.
And I want to also share about leads.
So many of us have people in our phones, we have people in our Facebook messages, we
have people in our activity trackers, I don't know if you guys have this or not also, but
this, I have dozens of these filled with prospects in here.
And I like to keep it physical because it makes it really easy for me to go back and
find people versus the search in Facebook or Messenger or anything like that.
I have dozens of these filled, and that is really the key to me getting so many people
signed up in whatever programs we offer or things that we're doing, is just harnessing
those relationships and getting people involved in what we're doing, because if you are not
following up at least five times with somebody, you're missing it.
Now, I'm not saying to be annoying and follow up five times in one day, but if you're not
following up at least five times throughout the year with somebody, you're missing the
boat.
And so am I perfect at this?
Do I hit each and every person?
Absolutely not.
I'm not perfect at it.
Am I better than most?
Yeah, definitely, because I'm not about, okay, let me get a million leads and then just hit
them one time and then try and get a million more.
To me, that seems absolutely exhausting.
To you, to some of you, this seems absolutely exhausting, right?
But to me, that seems absolutely exhausting.
I would much rather have a good system where I'm harnessing those relationships, creating
leverage because they actually know me and they actually see what I'm doing.
And this is something very simple that most people can do.
So that duplication effort and do it that way and really harness those leads, cultivate
those leads so that the harvest is much more beneficial.
So this may be something that you've heard before to follow up, follow up, follow up.
In fact, I'm positive that you have because.
We talked about it at our event.
And I'm sure your events, your company events,
your leadership, your company as a whole
has talked about this.
However, ask yourself, are you doing it?
Are you actually doing it and doing it well?
Are you actually going back through your leads
and looking at, okay, these are the people I've talked to,
this is what they've said, this is the no's,
this is the yes's, this is the maybe's,
this is the ones that said not right now.
Are you actually going back through everyone that you know,
every piece of Rolodex that you have,
every Facebook message, every Instagram message
that you've ever done and following up,
going back to them?
And my guess is the answer is no.
And again, I'm not perfect at it.
I'm certainly not touching every single person
that's ever come through our database or that I've talked to.
I definitely am not.
My guess is I'm following up with about 50%
in a diligent way.
And sometimes that number changes.
But again, I'm doing more than most.
And all success really is, is showing up.
It's 80% showing up.
And the other half of that is doing more than most.
If you do more than most people do,
you'll get more than most people have.
Because to whom much is given, much is required.
So that does not mean that you have to sacrifice
your boundary areas.
That may cause you to be sacrificial in other areas
like income, but it's good enough.
It's good enough right now.
If you have small children and that's a boundary
that you're not willing to cross, wonderful.
I'm all for that.
Just be careful with setting boundaries
around things that are really important to you
that may be idolatry.
Like maybe there's a sport that you absolutely love,
but it's taking you away from really focusing it
on your calling and where you know you need to be right now
and you know God wants you.
And you set that boundary.
Nope, I gotta do my tennis on Thursdays
or I gotta do this on Monday, Wednesday, Friday
or every day or whatever.
Get golf on Saturday all day,
whatever the case may be, you set that boundary.
But in actuality, it's not.
It's a sacrifice that God wants you to do.
It's not really what you're meant to be doing right now.
Sacrifice now so you can do it seven, eight days a week
later if you want to.
Of course, you're not gonna do it eight days a week,
but that was a joke, bad joke, okay.
Who else wants to share?
I'd love to hear from you
on some different breakthroughs that you're having.
I just ordered 10 for Christmas for my team, awesome.
Yeah, if I can talk?
Yes, absolutely.
Okay, I do have a story that I wanna share.
Please.
I don't know if it has anything to do
with what we're talking about.
I feel like it does.
We just had a Black Friday sale
and I have a friend in the States who bought our skincare.
And she was telling me that her sister came to visit
and she tried her skincare and she loved it,
but she doesn't have two nickels to rub together.
And she works at a homeless shelter
and she lives paycheck to paycheck.
She just got out of a three-year relationship
with a narcissist and she was crushed
and her health suffered and all that.
But she loved the products.
And I was called to send her a gift.
So I did.
And I can't tell you how good that made me feel.
So if that's a sacrifice, that's what I'm willing to make.
And I don't have a particular bucket
to put money into for that.
I'm just gonna go with what my heart tells me.
That's the first time I've ever done that.
But, and my friend was just crying on the phone
and I said, stop, it just, it happened.
And I felt it and she needs some love.
And so I just sent it to her and I said,
tell her not to freak out when it gets there.
Just tell her it's Santa and I hope she enjoys it.
So.
That's an amazing story.
Thank you for sharing.
My story.
And I was gonna further what Stephanie said
that I'm basically gonna sacrifice
whatever I have to for this mastermind
because I'm here for it.
And it's long overdue for me.
I've been lost for a lot of years
and I need to get sorted out.
I think I know what my calling is
and I'm gonna focus on that over pretty much everything else
except maybe taking care of my animals
because they need that every day.
So that's me.
I love that.
What a, what a powerful story and blessings come in different ways, right?
So you doing that, you know, it may not mean that you sponsored 10 more people from that.
It may, I don't know, but, um, blessings come in other ways.
And that's another lesson I had to learn from sacrifice is that sometimes when I sacrificed,
um, in the past money, for example, you know, I'm not going to buy that thing or I'm going
to, um, or I am going to give that money, I'm going to, you know, tie them, going to
do that.
I expected a financial reward and one, and I'm not, I know you did this out of the kindness
and love of your heart and what God was calling you to do.
Um, so I'm not saying you're expecting that.
Just I know that this message will, will resonate with some on here, um, because your story
is so powerful and I want to, I want to get this across.
So I expected a financial return, like, oh, God is going to, and it wasn't out of, I wasn't
trying to be conceited or like, oh yeah, I deserve this or anything like that.
It was so just, um, subconscious.
I wasn't even aware of it.
Like, oh, I'm doing this to receive a financial reward.
Um, right.
I mean, that's what you do.
And, and I'm being a good person and I'm doing this to receive more from God and, and he
hit me over the head with the ton of bricks.
One day when we had given, we had made a significant investment, hundreds of thousands of dollars
to this individual for a real estate deal that went completely South.
And I was, I was just sick over it.
And, um, God called us to, to forgive this person and to give it as a gift, which took
a lot of prayer, a lot, a lot of prayer, a lot of, uh, a lot of just back and forth.
Like, are you sure?
Are you sure, um, to give it as a gift.
And it hit me like a ton of bricks.
And he said to me, Jess, cause he calls me Jess, said to me, Jess, um, not every blessing
is financial.
And by you doing this, you're really helping a family that's desperately in need right
now.
And so I bless you with the feeling of helping this family, um, you know, that, that is struggling,
that just had a new baby and has another one on the way that really needs this blessing
because they didn't mean to, for the deal to fall through or anything like that.
It was just a bad set of circumstances.
And so that's when I realized in that moment, um, and became aware and awareness is very,
a very powerful tool in everything you do, just be more aware of your thoughts and, and,
and why you do certain things.
But I became aware that every blessing is not necessarily a financial blessing.
And so many times when we give money, we expect the blessing in return to be money.
And it was the feeling of knowing I blessed that family and they're, they're going to
be there.
Their kids are going to be able to eat now because we forgave that debt.
That was more of a blessing than I could have ever hoped for then.
Oh, instead of, you know, hundreds of thousands, you're going to get millions back.
And then, you know, who knows, maybe would have made a dumb decision with it or put it
into another bad investment or whatever.
You don't know, you can't ever possibly know what the future holds.
Only God knows that obviously.
So if you've, if you've put money into things, um, or, you know, like sent people things
and expected a financial return or what have you, um, and again, not saying you did this
Leslie, just in general, just remember that some of the blessings that God wants to bless
you with 10 times over are not necessarily monetary.
It may be an awareness on, on what you're doing with that money, but it may not be the
blessing of, of a monetary financial reward.
Well, I'll tell you, I'm going to tell you another, it's not a really story, but I, I
poured into someone that I thought I was going to be with forever.
And this is after my divorce.
So it's not that person, but, um, I poured into a family that was needy and, you know,
scraping by and this guy I thought was my soulmate.
And it turned really South for, you know, a couple of million dollars.
And it took me two years to learn that pouring into someone hoping for love in return is
not, not the way to do it, not the way to do it.
I, I don't know why I thought, I don't know.
I just, I really believed we were in this thing together and then poof, it turned out
he was into it for the money.
And that was all.
Um,
But I do believe that I did get a blessing from that because it taught me that I'm worth
what I'm worth, whether I have money or not. And if a person isn't just going to love me for me,
then I need to get out and I need to see it sooner. And it grew me exponentially. So I did
get a blessing out of that. And then the lady that I sent the stuff to, I knew going into it,
there was never going to be a purchase and I didn't care. I didn't care. I just wanted to
love on her and let her know, especially being a fellow survivor of narcissistic abuse, that
someone out there is thinking about her and just wants to shower her with a little bit of
self-care. So, yeah. Love that. Love that. Absolutely.
Thank you for sharing that. I know that's vulnerable and appreciate it.
Yeah. Can I, I raised my hand cause I thought about something real quick. I want to use a
real life example real quick. So this happened to me. So this year, so we were dead broke like
December, right? And we were in church. That's how we build our relationship, me and Megan. And
I remember like we had $40, like we, we had $40. That was literally what we had to give to the
church. It was the end of the year. And we gave it to the church and I was like, I feel something.
I don't know what it is, but anyway, a couple of days later, long story short, gotten the
opportunity we're in made like a few thousand dollars the first week and then just started
going crazy. And a few, like two or three months later at our church, they had a, like an offer.
So a bunch of the people were going to, to Ecuador, to the Amazon jungle to build clean water,
like water infiltrate, like water filtration system. So they can drink clean water. Right.
And we're like, okay, we have enough money. Now we're going to help. We gave him a thousand
dollars to go build a couple. It was like helped like three families drink clean water in the
Amazon jungle. But like the deal was like, Oh, they're going to tag us and put up faith, do a
Facebook post because of their company, stuff like that. And then I noticed like, they never tagged
me in a Facebook post or hold up a sign in the Amazon jungle. They held up like our local DA,
the big businesses in the area, the like, you know, the, the town sheriff, stuff like that,
the county sheriff, but not like little Kyle Devine. Right. So I got hurt about it then,
but now, now I like learned a lesson that like, I was able to literally help people,
the Amazon jungle, like, come on now, like somebody, you know, so that was a huge lesson
for me. I was like, that's, that's patients out. I'm just like, you know, appreciate what
we're blessed with that we can actually, you know, serve. So, yeah. I, I, I love that you
shared this because this is where awareness becomes so important, becoming aware of where
you're not aware. So you were totally unaware that you were actually expecting something
for doing, for doing this. Not that you didn't do it out of, you know, your heart and wanting to
help you did, but there was also a part of you that was like, Hey, and Hey, and if I do this,
I'm going to get this maybe. And it's, it's normal. I'm not chastising you for that. It's
human. We're human, but, but become aware of those moments and those teaching moments,
because there's always a bigger blessing on these, on the other side of them. And that's both,
you know, personally and financially becoming aware of why did, okay. Why am I offended here?
How did, how did this upset me? Where, where can I learn from this? So becoming aware of where
you're not aware. Most people think that they're totally aware, especially in this business.
Are you kidding me? Entrepreneurship business owners. We know everything we're aware. We,
we are so personally developed. We read the Bible every day. We are so aware.
And the fact of the matter is there's always another level.
I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to tune in one more thing real quick. I just want to like
land this plane real quick. So it goes back to play to win season two. When I was the first
person, I was like the first person voted off on that couch. And like, why have I always been like,
picked last in high school, like on all the sports teams. Right.
It's because I even on that show, like I remember rated interviews, everybody's not like me. They
didn't like me because I would always portray this person to feel loved that I had to be,
I would have to become somebody and like stick out, you know, and be like that,
that person that goes so extra to try to, you know, fit in. And that was it. Like that's,
that's how, that's a lesson I learned just like that. Like I,
like your true heart, like, what are you really doing?
things for in life, not like, like you're saying now what other people are thinking,
you're doing it for you and God, like that's, that's, that's it, you know? And yeah, so
that was it. So that's why I kept going. I'm still here.
Yeah. So, so, so powerful. You know, the, I think I find that the number one reason people are held
back is because they're not honest with themselves. That's, that's mainly it. They're not being honest
with themselves. Where are they not doing their best? Where are they not going where they're
called? Where are they still hanging on to their strongholds? Where are they not sacrificing?
Where are they not aware that they're not aware? Just be honest, be as honest with yourself,
brutally honest. And that goes into repentance, right? Switching from, okay, now that I'm honest
about these things and I'm aware of these things, switching my trajectory, which repentance actually
means switching your trajectory, not necessarily confession. Those are two different things.
Switching that trajectory to, oh, okay. That's where I need to be. That's the path I need to be
on. And, and so you being aware of that is huge, massive. Anybody have a question
while we're on here? Yes.
I didn't have a question. So if you want to field questions, we were just going to share.
No, no, no. Go ahead. Share, share away.
Um, well, first of all, just thank you because it's always a timely discussion to talk about,
but for us, especially like we were literally starting to have these conversations because
we just got married, we had two houses full of stuff. And so coming together and two businesses.
So as entrepreneurs, we just really have to take a look at everything that we're doing,
looking at not only our finances, but our, our resources as time and something that I'm learning
right now. So there's kind of a flip to the sacrificial thing that I'd love to share too.
Like being, um, a health practitioner, I would say that I have led a sacrificial business from this,
led a sacrificial business from this, from the way that I just want my clients to win.
Like I want them to be successful and always putting that money back into the business.
So we have more reach, right. To, um, get some more people and building that up over, you know,
six or so years and getting to be between like, you know, multiple six figures working on a
million dollars a year, and then having the bottom fall out underneath you. Um, when you're
always operating from that sacrificial place to go get and help more people, but you don't,
you know, prepare, that's the lesson that I'm learning right now. Um, being in a season where
things shifted lots of things, multiply all at the same time, um, where we just have to reassess
everything. Um, that I'm realizing how much I was sacrificing of myself, you know, um, that I can't
do for my family and our future right now, we're having to really look at things differently.
Um, and the blessings of that sacrifice, like coming into like having this beautiful man,
join our family and things like that. It's not always financial. Um, but this is a really awesome
conversation that, um, that we, we just need to have, cause there's always going to be another
level to the lesson. Like, um, like I couldn't have even seen like six figures when I put like
education on a credit card. They didn't have as a single mom with no income. I couldn't have seen
like the financial state that we have right now, which is an amazing abundance compared to
where we were. Right. So there's always going to be a next level to that,
that risk-taking or that sacrifice or that faith. Um, and some, one of the, I forget who gave me
this lesson, but I really loved it. It just really hit me that for the level of abundance that you're
looking for the, the level of sacrifice, but to be able to hold the duality of the good and the
bad at the same time. So the, the severity of the, or the intensity, like you're talking about
legal battles, like having been sued, been there, done that, like, you know, you have to, you have
to build that skillset or that grit or the, you know, the knowledge or, you know, um, the wisdom
that comes out of what, what did I not, was I not aware of that? I now know to go through that.
And so that's also a sacrifice. I think as an entrepreneur that we have to, you know, when
things get hard or whatever, we have to give ourselves a little grace for, for going through
that. And, and I love that you brought up blessings that aren't necessarily financial.
Um, cause you know, even though we're in like a place where we're starting over.
in lots of different ways. And finances are tighter than they've been in a minute.
The blessing is going to be exponential for taking a look at the things that we didn't
know before, having the help, leaning into the conversation. And that's another thing too,
just appreciate everybody's vulnerability. That's an amazing skill set. The more you can reach out
and ask for help, like that's been the lesson that I've learned over and over and over again,
is don't try to do it by yourself. People are there to help you. So I just want to shout out,
was it Lisa? I couldn't see your face on, Leslie. As a survivor of narcissistic abuse,
nearly murdered by that and endured that, thank you for doing that for that person.
I know if that something had hit me like that, it would have been a life-changing thing for me. So
just a shout out to you for doing that. But yeah, so it's just a really, you know, time,
God is good, right? He always lines things up and you need to hear them and just affirming that
we're doing the things that we need to be doing and adding things to the list that we need to take
a look of in awareness and that we're not doing it alone, right? So we appreciate the example that
you and Ray share here and everybody that shows up to be a part of this conversation. So do you
have anything to add to that? Yeah, no, it's, you know, hearing Miranda's, I mean, we met in March,
right? So we're eight months going on nine months into this thing and hearing the stories of people
that she has entrusted, went to for help and they were in it for themselves or to take her excellence
and her name and her reputation, her integrity, her character and use it for their financial gain.
And, you know, and then just for her to step up again and go, nope, we're going to, you know, I'm
going to, I'm going to seek out counsel again. I'm going to seek out coaching and leadership again.
You know, it is when we all have those stories where we thought this person was going to
take us to the promised land and ended up taking us to the wilderness. And it's like,
that's not what you promised me. I'm looking for milk and honey and big grapes. Okay. What are you
serving? I'm stuck with manna and quail. So, but all that to say that, you know, it's like,
without faith, it is impossible to please God. So if we want to be pleasing, we've got to be able
to, we've got to be willing to step out and trust that, you know, it's that scene in Indiana Jones,
when he's at the, he's told that there's this, you know, this bridge to go to cross the gap, but
he has to close his eyes and just step out and trust that step is going to be there. He's not
going to, you know, fall into the, the cavern bottomless pit there. And so that's, that's what
this life requires. This is what this opportunity requires. It's what our faith requires. Our walk
with the Lord is like, we got to believe that he's good and that his word is true. He said,
I've never seen the righteous forsaken nor the seed begging bread. Like take no thought for
tomorrow. Tomorrow, take care. Hey, if I clothe the lilies and I feed the sparrows, I got you,
like, you're good. Like I've, and it's just a faith to believe that he is who he says he is,
that he keeps his word, his promises never return void. And it's just the power of the belief in
that. And, and although, you know, it's that way maker song, even when I don't see it, you're
working. Even when I don't know what you're working like, and just believe he is always
working everything for our good, for his glory. And, and so it's an exciting opportunity to just
partner with all of you all. And let's, let's just see God show up and show off in all of our lives
and all of our marriages and relationship with all of our kids and our finances and everything
that concerns us. The scripture says that he always leads us into a victorious place. If our
eyes are on him, we're following him. The only option is victory on the other side of it.
Hmm. Amen. So many talk anymore. I'll have to take up an offering. So I'm going to stop.
Yes, yes, yes. Thank you for bringing up the opposite of sacrifice as well. You know,
being at the other end of sacrificing too much when you're actually not called to sacrifice that
much. It's almost like a, a, that's an ego thing too. And that was an awareness that I had to,
to, to realize a little while ago is that sometimes we over-sacrifice to show how humble
we are to show how, uh, how much we have to give to, and, and again, this is not intentional.
None of it is a show off like, Hey, I'm so conceited and self-absorbed. It's a lack of
awareness that we're even.
doing it that we our ego is so strong, the enemy knows how to
how to get in there and just redirect us where it's so on
autopilot, we don't even know what's happening. So that that
level of self sacrifice that can take over can almost, you know,
be a total ego driven thing that we have to be aware of, too. So
like you were mentioning that balance is is difficult and
huge. Yes.
Yeah, Jessica, you know, Philippians two says prefer one
another above ourselves. One thing the Lord said to me a
while back, because Jeremy, I never said don't prefer
yourself. Like, like, you matter. So I just everybody else
matters. You actually matter, as well, to your point of what
you're saying. It's like, sometimes we forget that, you
know, we've got to, you know, we've got to get filled ourself
in in the mountains for his highest, I think it's February
18th or 19. Oswald chamber, the devotion that day is are you
spiritually exhausted? He's like, you should be like, you
should be constantly pouring yourself out. But you have
responsibility to make sure you're taking time to fill
yourself, get filled back up, and not not run on not run an
empty constantly give and give and give and not receiving to
get your tank filled again.
So powerful. I'd love to add I don't know how many people here
have a business where you can set your own pricing based on
your costs and stuff. Because if people are network marketers,
you have a system in place. But as someone that charges for
time, like, that's the big thing, right? Because you're
having to figure out your bottom line. And when you're constantly
putting time into it, it's really hard to do that. So that
is a major, major shift that we're doing is and you know,
it's tricky to go like into this lack place. Well, are people
going to pay that you have to set like a boundary for it to
kind of get yourself out of that. So that's a whole nother
level of growing, of, you know, being able to accept, you know,
your worth, and the way that that the Lord loves you and what
you want to have, like, you have to establish that. And when you
can create it, you create those boundaries, like I have, you
know, full autonomy of doing that, and selling it at
whatever price that I want to and making it what it's worth.
And so and when things get not good, you want to like run a
sale or something to and so it's just it's those things
have, there's a lot of lessons over the past, you know, several
years of doing that. And so just want to put that out there as
like a powerful thing that we have in this group is to be able
to talk about those kinds of things that we've all
experienced. So that when we're, you know, working with all of
you all, you know, Ray and Jess, you and Deon, and like, we're
throwing these things out, like, don't hesitate to speak up about
something that you've learned in a lesson, when it comes to
sacrificing and all that stuff, because it's so powerful in that
awareness model of like, you want to walk into another, you
know, another situation that somebody else has been into that
can kind of help you from that, like, that's why we're, we're
here. But that's, that's definitely a big part of the,
you know, in the way of sacrifice, and just take an
assessment of where we are from things from a financial
standpoint, we've been blessed abundantly in every other way
that we can imagine. It's just a restructuring and for what's
to come, right, so that we can be better stewards of
to pruning,
yeah, cutting away the things we don't need, definitely when we
have two businesses and two homes, and all these things that
we don't need, and two electric bills and all that stuff. It
just takes time to work through that stuff, too, right. So and
actually sitting down and doing that work. So we appreciate the
conversation for sure.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, sometimes it just takes that little tweak of
direction to say, go do this now. Go schedule it now.
Because a lot of us are just so on GOMA, we don't, we don't make
that time to schedule. And many of you two are in amazing
financial positions. And there are projects that you need to
let go of. So sacrificing the time and the effort and the
energy that you put into it already to say, No, I'm gonna,
I'm gonna let that go is very hard. Sometimes it's even most
times, it's harder than saying yes, to sacrifice that and let
that go. So make sure that you're you're really, you're
really thinking about the projects and where you need to
say no, and praying over those buckets as well, to increase
that even more, because there's, I cannot tell you how many
mentors of ours and how many business leaders that we've
studied, that, and ourselves included, that we've implemented
this just from learning it that have said no to multiple things.
And when we said no to multiple things, and honed in on the one
thing that was going to move the needle, exponentially, things
10x. And that
process can take a little time and it can take sacrifice.
It takes some different financial decisions too,
but ultimately, and time sacrifice as well,
but ultimately, honing down some of the major projects
that we have to really focus in on the one.
That's why over each of these buckets,
just praying through what does this ultimate goal look like?
What does that look like?
And I don't care if it's, I want an extra $500 a month
or I want an extra million dollars a month
because these are the projects that I have in place,
which for some of you, you're right on the cusp of.
Those projects, you need to make sure
that it's where you're being called
and not just you being aware,
not just you just charging through
and trying to make it happen
because you know it would be a good thing
because then ultimately it'll fall apart.
You'll take on too much.
You won't have the infrastructure.
You won't have the wisdom that comes to you from God
to know how to steward that properly.
And you could have saved yourself that whole thing.
So faith and finance are of course one in the same
and that's why we created this.
So before we wrap up here,
I wanna just encourage all of you to pray about something
because you've really inspired me
and talking through those of you who have suffered
from a narcissistic relationship or just abuse in general,
obviously a lot of us struggle with similar things
that have happened in our lives.
And so, like I said, I want this group
to really move forward as a body,
as a moving momentum entity, if you will,
that's really helping the masses.
So if each of us would commit,
we're coming up on the Christmas season,
if each of us would commit to doing something similar
to what Leslie did, only if you feel called,
this is not out of guilt,
it's not out of, cause Jess said this would be a good idea,
only if you feel called to do it.
But if each of us would commit to whatever our product
or service is, gifting that to somebody this holiday season,
that would be really, really cool.
That would be really awesome.
And encouraging maybe your organizations,
not only your employees, your contractors,
but your teams to do that as well.
Those that can, right?
That would be amazing, an amazing way to move forward
this holiday season and make an impact.
So I appreciate you all.
I don't wanna do a hard stop.
If any of you have to jump off, I understand,
but if any of you have an extra question
that you'd like to ask,
I'm happy to answer it quickly while we're on here
if somebody has another question.
I got a question.
Yeah.
It's a curve ball, so it's gonna throw you for a curve ball
or any other bombs on here.
Try me.
So, okay, so Megan,
so I didn't get to really experience Kennedy.
Like I learned about her,
like when she was like a year and a half old, right?
So your best advice for the husband
with a mom about to like, you know, 25 weeks pregnant,
like what's your best advice?
Just support, support, support, support.
Just be there for her.
She may go through some emotional rollercoasters.
She may not,
but I can tell you that I'm a very happy,
happy-go-lucky person, bubbly.
Like they used to call me bubbles, okay?
And when I first had Sabrina,
I didn't realize it at the time because you don't,
but I had postpartum depression and it completely,
she's already had, you know, a daughter,
so it's not that new to her,
but it just completely alters your life.
And you never know when those hormones are gonna show up.
Well, no, this is Megan's first kid ever.
Like my daughter is from like a girl I met
on Facebook years ago, stuff like that.
Well, she's, but she's already, you know,
she's already kind of in a stage of taking care,
but yeah, her first,
it's definitely gonna be a big change for her,
at least for a little while.
I mean, for the rest of your guys' lives, of course,
but that first six months or so, like just support.
She may sound crazy at times.
She may be emotional, all the things,
all the moms can tell you, just what do you need?
How can I help?
What do you need?
How can I help?
Putting that ego aside, we're gonna drive you nuts.
And so is the baby, but what do you need?
How can I help?
That's, that would be my biggest advice.
I'm sure there's other moms on.
here that have other advice, but just that alone is huge.
That's good.
All right, thank you for that.
Yeah, great question.
Thank you for asking.
Yeah, I know.
I think you asked.
I gotta get better at this stuff.
Like, I don't know.
That's what I'm here for, you know?
Yeah, absolutely.
Anybody else have a question?
Yeah, patience, Kim said, absolutely.
So Jessica talked to us about,
and I'm sure you've had this conversation before,
like you and Ray are both,
I could use the worldly term,
but like you're both like driven and ambitious
and you're type A's and you know,
you're go-getters, like how to,
cause the, you know, exhibit A, like right here,
like we're both wired that way.
You know, what, how have you all found the ways
to honor one another's giftings?
You know, when Miranda and I,
one of my favorite talks we had was a few mornings ago,
because there's so many strengths that she has,
like she is, she's like, I see A, I see Z.
I know where I wanna go.
I have no idea B through Y, how I'm gonna get there.
I just know where I wanna go.
And so follow through up to now
has not been one of my strongest points.
And, but what the Lord showed me is
what I've been seeing as deficiencies in me
are actually, I'm a puzzle piece and she is,
God has designed her perfectly
to fit into what I consider deficiencies,
but really they're not deficiencies.
He has designed her and I to perfectly fit,
compliment one another.
So how have you and Ray,
how do you all navigate the strengths
and the weaknesses of each
and honor one another in the process?
Well, it's been a long journey for that, for sure,
because we did both start that way
and probably had a decade of almost,
not necessarily being in competition,
but being in competition with each other.
And it wasn't healthy.
And there was a time about five years ago
where we almost separated
because I didn't want to live that way anymore.
I was burnt out as a female, as a woman.
And what I didn't realize is I had taken away
a lot of the things that made him feel masculine,
made him feel like a man.
I had taken those away, not realizing it.
Again, being unaware of what I was unaware of.
I took on everything, the finances.
I mean, he made a lot of money, obviously.
He was very good at what he did,
but he stayed in his lane
and he did his one thing very well.
And I took on everything else thinking I was helping
when in actuality I was creating more and more resentment
towards him as I did it,
unbeknownst to me, completely just unaware,
and was actually hindering him
and hurting his masculine energy, his ego,
his reason, his purpose for living,
which is to provide for me,
at least in a marriage, right?
And so I would say it took a lot of prayer,
it took a lot of mentorship for me to realize
that I was actually the problem
because I thought he was the problem,
but I was the problem because every woman,
I don't care what she says, okay?
And there may be some pushback on this.
Some of you may not like this,
and I'm willing to step out there and say it
if you don't like it, just sit with it and ask yourself why.
Every woman wants to be taken care of.
I don't care what she says, she wants to be taken care of.
That may look differently for different women,
but she wants to be provided for in some way, shape or form.
And when you take that from your husband, it's tough
because he doesn't know where to go,
he doesn't know his identity, he doesn't know his place.
Now, I don't suspect that you two are in as deep of a pit
as we were in that regard of a personalities
because you're both very godly, you're both very biblical.
We just came to Christ a few years ago, right?
So it's things that we're learning.
But even going through the new age phase,
it did help us in our relationship
because I learned to harness more of the feminine energy
that God gave me.
So my suggestion would be to remember
as two type A personalities
that whatever you take on as a couple,
you also take away from the other spouse doing
or the other spouse stepping in and filling in that gap.
And so if it doesn't bring you joy and fulfillment
and it's not where you feel you're called,
and sometimes we have to do that.
Sometimes we have to step in and take over those roles,
but having very clear expectations of where you're growing,
where you fit as a couple into the vision
and knowing what makes both of you happy,
like where are both of you happy or deepest desire,
that's huge because I thought that I was actually helping him
and that he didn't wanna take over those responsibilities
like managing the finances and the credit cards
and all these different things
and the operations of the business.
I thought I was helping there when in actuality,
he was dying to take over those things for me,
but thought that I was thriving off of that
and didn't wanna take that away from me
because he was so supportive.
And so I hindered his muscle for building
this operations mind and financial mind.
And I also took on something
that made me more and more better.
So just having that communication
of what do you ultimately want from one another
and how can I be of service is everything
because I guarantee you guys want very similar things.
You just, sometimes at times,
I'm sure are scared to share with the other,
communicate that because you're worried that it might,
it might not be what the other one wants.
It's great.
So I hope that that helps.
It's a good step, thank you.
We're definitely living it.
Good.
In a good way, a very good way.
I will say that we've been very,
we've dated differently.
I would say that many people that are middle-aged,
going in with an intention and laying all that stuff out,
but there's always, again, there's always a next level
and it takes time to get all that stuff weeded out,
but that's great advice.
We're definitely seeing the benefit of what you're sharing.
She being nice to you guys?
Very nice.
She can be tough.
She's so nice.
So nice.
Awesome, guys.
Appreciate that.
Yeah.
Thank you for asking that question.
It's great.
Well, I hope that you all have the most amazing week.
We will be getting these planners out to all of you,
but don't wait, make the time,
don't wait for the planner to come,
but I'm curious to see how this helps you in your journey,
and I want to hear from you.
So make sure you reach out to me around this.
Thank you so much for being on here and sharing your hearts.
I really appreciate it.
And I look forward to hearing the stories too
of what you decide to give this holiday season,
whether it's a service, your time, your product,
be cool to find someone in need to send it to
and see what blessings come from that.
So love you guys.
Oh, what was that?
Sorry.
Ken wants to say hi to you.
Kennedy wanted to say hi to you, my daughter.
Oh, hi Kennedy.
I don't see you.
Oh, I don't know how to change this background.
I don't know how to change it.
Okay, well, I'll show them.
Well, tell hi Kennedy, if you can hear me.
Oh, there she is.
Hi.
Your dad treating you right?
Friend loves to say hi too.
Hi bud, so cute.
Yeah.
All right, thank you.
Yeah, good to see you.
You guys have an amazing week
and we'll see you on the next one.