Good evening, welcome everyone.
Hi ladies with your cameras on.
Hello everyone else.
If you're able, turn your cameras on and let me see you.
Love to see you all.
Who is joining us new for the first time tonight?
You've never been on a live session with us.
Let us know that you're here and you're joining for the first time
so that we can welcome you.
And then if you all are able,
if your screen name says something like user phone or anything like
iPhone, if you tap on your screen, you should see three dots.
Go ahead and click on that.
And then you'll see an option that's renamed.
If you can just at least put your first name in there for me,
so I know who you are.
Denise, welcome for your first time.
Sophia, welcome for your first time.
Awesome.
Anyone else joining for the first time?
I know a couple ladies just logged in.
Go ahead and let us know in the chat.
As you all start to do that, I don't know if I actually said my name.
For those that are new, I'm Bethany Cooper.
I am the Master Heart Work Coach in our community.
And just love what I'm doing,
love that God led me here to first go through what you all are going
through.
So I've been where you are and just super grateful for all God has done
in my life in the last three and a half years.
So honored to get to know all of you a little bit and get a glimpse of
what God is doing in your life.
But most importantly,
just the blessing of seeing God setting so many people free through this
community and what he's doing here and helping people, you know,
break, breaking free and financial and jobs and career,
family reconciliation, walking into, you know, spirit, make connections.
And it's just been an incredible journey. And that is,
that is what's in store for you. It is.
But first we do the heart work because that's what works.
It really changes. Everything's so welcome. Let's see.
It says iPhone is first time. So let me know who you are, Sarah.
Welcome for your first time as well.
And then ladies who have been here, welcome back. It's so good to see you.
A couple of little housekeeping plugs, a supernatural Saturday.
If you all don't know what that is yet,
that's when typically Jackie will come live and she'll just release some
things that she's been hearing from God or God's nudging her to share with
us. And this last Saturday was about disciplining our minds and overcoming
negative thoughts. And you all, we kind of, we talked on that last week and,
you know,
Jackie had no clue what we touched on last week and she didn't know what we
were going to talk about tonight,
but it's really an amazing centerpiece to the bookends of last week and
tonight. So if you haven't heard that yet,
definitely want to encourage you to listen to that.
That is in the replay section of the app.
I'm going to do a quick little run through.
I'm probably going to do shorter than I did this afternoon. Just because we,
I cannot talk.
We ran out of time this afternoon and I don't want to do that this evening,
but I want to show those of you that are new and maybe even you've been here
a week or two, and you're just not sure what our tabs in the app are for.
So I want to do just a quick walkthrough of our app.
So when y'all are in the community tab of the phase one app,
what you're looking at right now, this is my desktop version of the app.
So it looks a little different on the phone, but not a lot.
You all won't have the settings tab. That's because I'm an admin.
So I see different stuff, but you all have community tab.
You have courses tab, replays, events, and resources.
Anybody that isn't sure where to find the events.
So these live sessions or the prayer calls, if you click on that events tab,
it's going to bring up our calendar and it'll populate here in a minute.
And it's going to have all of the things that are on your calendar for phase
one in here.
When you click on that, the zoom link is there.
I will say as a reminder, best practice,
ladies log into zoom before you click this link.
If you still have trouble, when you click on this link,
if you scroll down just like I did,
you're going to see a meeting ID and passcode here.
If you go directly to zoom and click, join a meeting and enter that,
you should get right in. I know it's a couple more steps, but it will work.
Unfortunately we can't fix we've been trying. It's not on our end,
but there are certain types of phones that are not working as well with those
links.
So unfortunately it just is not something we can fix right away.
It might just take a little while longer with the certain phone users.
And the other thing I wanted to make sure tonight that I went over when
you're on the community tab, we have these different tabs here at the top,
all wins, ask a coach relationship milestone, first and foremost,
it's okay if you don't get it in the place that you intended to get it.
No matter what, your post will be seen,
and one of our team members will get back to you as soon as we can.
But I did want to let you know,
if you have a specific question about something you're processing,
about the program,
maybe you can't find out where something's at,
if you click on what's on your mind,
I'm going to create a post.
If I click on, ask a coach,
it's going to highlight that gold.
I'll want to unhighlight all,
and then I can type in my post and whatever question I have to share.
I'm going to give you all a pro tip too.
I would encourage you, especially if you have
a post that you think might be a little longer,
I would type that in the notes on your phone,
and then just copy it,
and then paste it in the post.
I've had some people,
after they poured their hearts out,
accidentally closed it, and they're so discouraged.
I want to protect you all from that.
Just sometimes people bump it and it just closes or whatever.
Type it out, maybe copy and paste it.
That's what I do for a lot of the pin posts that you all see.
I type things in a totally different document and copy and paste them.
The other one, just so you all know,
so wins from our perspective is any win that you experience.
Maybe you're getting breakthrough,
maybe there's something you've been praying for,
maybe something you put on your Jesus cares board,
that God is starting to answer,
you're starting to see some movement there.
Maybe it's just, hey,
God gave me this aha in revelation during the session tonight.
It's whatever is a win for you, big or small.
Relationship milestones, these are not dating.
In phase 1, this is like when you all have people that you're praying for about
relationship and you need reconciliation or peace or whatever the dynamic is there.
We want you to come in here and testify about what God is doing.
I think it's still in here.
You might find, okay,
so I did a post way back six months ago.
I would encourage you all even to read this.
I believe it'll give you a lot of hope in faith regarding reconciliation and how God
will work even as some of you enter spirit mate relationships in the future,
how God might use your spirit mate to bring reconciliation as well.
If you want to check that out,
but that's what that tab is for.
All literally means anything,
anything that you want to post about.
Again, if you post and it's a win and it goes in all,
that's totally fine.
But I did want you all to know what the different tabs are for.
Ask a coach if you have a question.
We're going to see it there first.
Every day when I go in to answer people,
that's the first tab I go to,
and then typically I go to all and I'll check the other ones as well.
But just want you all to have that understanding of that side of things.
Laura, sometimes some people just really they have to do the manual.
I had to do that for a long time and then way back a year ago in
a different method we were using and it eventually went away,
so I don't know what that is.
One other thing I wanted to tell you all,
when you all get to the week that has divorce and remarriage session in it,
I really want to encourage everybody to watch it,
even if you've never been divorced.
Okay? Here's why.
A, you all probably know someone that has gone through divorce.
Some of you, your spirit mates might be divorced.
I know for some of you, you're just like,
I'm never going to marry someone that's been divorced.
But I'm just going to let some of you know,
God might lead you to that person.
Okay? But be open.
Be open to what God wants to teach you through that.
We have so many people that absolutely get breakthrough hearing this message.
There's a lot of wrong teaching about divorce and remarriage
and a lot of misunderstanding about what the Bible scriptures,
you know, that Paul was saying, and it's been misused and mishandled.
And so I want to encourage you all, don't skip over that.
Okay? Make sure you're listening to that.
Investing in your self-care throughout your journey is super important.
Again, drinking lots of water, getting plenty of rest,
eating healthy and moving your body.
Okay. Let me pray for us.
And then we're going to get started tonight.
Father, thank you so much for this night.
Thank you, God, for just being such a close friend.
And Father, thank you for coming in with good gifts
that you desire to give us from heaven.
Even when we don't believe that, God,
I thank you that you would impart the gift of faith into us tonight.
I ask you to increase our faith
through understanding the principles of heaven.
We ask you to bring anything out of darkness into the light
so that there can be healing and redemption and restoration, God,
that we would be, yes, Lord,
the book that other people would read.
Testimonies would bring a life to those who read them.
God, we thank you that you are working,
even right now in our stories.
I thank you, God, that you're weaving a tapestry
that is going to be a masterpiece,
far beyond what we could ever ask, think, or imagine.
We thank you, God, for placing the balm of Gilead
upon our hearts, our minds, our bodies,
our spirits, and our souls,
and restoring us from the inside out.
We thank you, Lord.
Yes, Lord, any place where we feel afraid
to admit our mistakes,
we ask you to help us to come out of shame
and come into the fullness of your light and your love.
We thank you, God, that you would help us
to even be reconciled with ourselves.
Holy Spirit, thanks for being here.
We ask you to come and just have your way.
Weave in and out of conversations through this teaching.
Just give me ideas and understanding,
even as I'm conveying what I've prepared in advance, God.
You know the examples and the situations
all of these women have been through.
So Lord, help me to hear what your Spirit is saying
and convey it to them.
In Jesus' name, amen.
All right, ladies, so we're going tonight
through overcoming fear and anxiety, as well as control.
So that's kind of what we're gonna be tracking through
this evening.
And I want you all just to start thinking
about the last week or so.
And I want you to ask the Lord to reveal to you
any area where you have struggled with fear or anxiety.
And I just want you to start as things,
I don't know what's going on tonight, y'all.
I'm getting extra words coming out of my mouth.
Pray for me.
Thank you, Jesus, for clarity.
As things are coming up in your spirit,
as I'm talking and teaching,
I wanna encourage you to write some things down
on your paper and just let the Holy Spirit lead you.
Some of you might not even realize
that anxiety and fear were the source
of what you were encountering this past week.
So just be open to what Holy Spirit brings up.
As we start tonight's session,
I want you to also think about
how impressionable our hearts are.
This afternoon, I have never thought of this before,
but I thought of like when you go to the dentist
and you have, you know, they do an impression of your teeth.
That's so that they can know every crack
and crevice of your teeth and all of those things.
But that was kind of like, okay,
you're leaving an impression.
Your teeth are leaving this mark.
Well, everything that we take in through our eye gate,
our ear gates, everything that we've heard for years,
as well as the things that we say to ourselves,
they are leaving an impression on our hearts.
So we don't walk away unchanged, ladies.
We walk away changed.
And one of the things I was sharing this afternoon as well
is that it can impact everybody,
but different people get impacted on different levels.
If you tend to be more empathetic,
you feel a lot, like you feel deep.
Not that everybody doesn't feel deep,
but for example, I'm an INFJ.
I'm a big feeler.
I feel things all the time.
I can walk into a room with people,
even in the church and feel negative things
coming from people that I'm not even by.
And so I wanna encourage you,
if that is something that you experience,
you're probably gonna have to be more careful
about what you listen to, what you watch,
what you take in, like I said, through your eyes.
Like even on social media,
if I start seeing a lot of negative stuff,
I've gotta get eye log out
because my spirit just picks up on that so quick.
And so I wanna encourage you again,
your heart is highly impressionable.
I want you to also be thinking about,
the Lord just said, some of you need to like,
be thinking about your friends,
your friend circles and the things your friends are saying.
Some of you, it might even be family members.
They're saying negative things, even about this process.
And what is this heart working?
You're sharing with them because you're excited,
but then you're walking away from those conversations
with family and friends and not feeling so encouraged.
And that probably is because
they're not the right person to be sharing with
about those details.
So I wanna encourage you to maybe just ask the Holy Spirit
if that's happening.
It doesn't mean you can't share with them at all,
but it just means maybe you need to be careful
about how much you share with them.
Proverbs 4.23 in the ESV version says this,
"'Keep your heart with all vigilance,
"'for from it flows the springs of life.'"
"'Keep your heart with all vigilance,
"'for from it flows the springs of life.'"
Vigilance, the definition is the quality or state
of being vigilant.
Vigilant means alertly watchful.
to avoid danger. If you were on Saturday, Jackie was talking about how important it is for us to
have a door by our heart, okay? Now a door is different than a wall. A wall is going to keep
people out. A door opens and closes on hinges, right? But not only do we need a door, she said
we need to have a guard. Not that we wall people out and that we're afraid of everything, but we
need to have a guard there. We need to protect our hearts from everything coming right on in.
James 3 11 through 12 says, can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My
brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring
produce fresh water. I'm using that scripture because we may need to also pause and ask the
Lord to show us what parts of our hearts are producing fresh water and other parts that,
in this sense, it's saying, you know, that salt water, but let's think of it in the sense of,
like, things that are salty, things that are negative. It's in there. It's everything bitter,
like the sea is kind of salty, right? I think I've heard that before. But it wasn't very good.
Oh, did I did I just get a little bit weird there for a minute? Okay, are we all caught up? All
right. So be thinking about what's in your heart. Is there bitterness and stuff in there that's
contaminating the fresh water, the fresh spring? The Bible also declares that rivers of living
water will flow up out of our bellies. They're down in there, and they can flow up and out
when we are spending time in the presence and we're spending time with the Lord,
and we want that stuff to come out. So we need to be careful about what we're letting in.
I was watching the heartwork the other day with a friend of mine that I'm walking through it. And
I've watched these heartwork videos, ladies, time and time again. But I heard something
that I don't think I've really noticed before. And in week two, one of the videos,
Jackie said that we don't want to leave our hearts wide open so that people with dirty shoes can walk
right in and stomp all over our heart. You know, they're bringing all their mess in. So is there
anybody in your life right now that you're allowing them full access, but they're stomping
all over your heart because they're not healthy? Things that they're doing, things that they're
saying, does it mean we need to get rid of them and get them out of our lives? No, but we do need
to guard our hearts, being alertly watchful to avoid danger. All right, fear. What is it? Fear
is false evidence appearing real, ladies. So I asked you kind of to start noting what was a fear
or anxiety you struggled with in the last week. I want you to think about that fear and start to
ask the Holy Spirit, what was the false thing in that that the enemy was trying to make look real?
Just like when Jesus was in the wilderness and Satan came to tempt him. Again, I think I use
this example a week or two ago. Satan tried to bring this little piece of truth, but he twisted
it. It wasn't truth. Jesus knew it wasn't. And that's why he spoke truth to Satan and overcame
every one of those temptations and struggles. We will also encounter similar things where the enemy
will take a piece of truth and try to twist it so that we are confused. And then we're left with
fears and all these things. So fear is false evidence appearing real. Anxiety is fueled by
fear. And what if thoughts? Anxiety is fueled by fear and what if thoughts? How many what if
thoughts have you had in the past week? What if this happens? What if that happens? What if
what if they say this? What if they think that, you know, you post in the group and you're like,
what if they think I'm, what if they think I'm stupid? What if they think that's weird? What if
they, the enemy loves to get us into these what if statements and questions, and we never have
peace when we live in those places. So we need to really, again, take that time to think about
what we're thinking about, which is what Jackie talked about Saturday. And I talked about last
week. Trauma that happened to us isn't what's
stops us from living an amazing life, ladies.
Yes, those were horrible things that we went through,
but here's what actually keeps us
from living an abundant life.
It's the lies we believe as a result of the trauma.
Fears and anxiety feed off of the lies.
Do you see the core underneath
of all of the fear and anxiety
most of you are experiencing is lies,
and the lies are connected to trauma and wounds.
One of the things I started sharing this afternoon,
and again, I try to tell a very, very fine line
because I'm a coach, I'm not a counselor, I'm not a doctor,
but there are some things that I've learned along the way
that I think will be helpful for you.
The reason we talk so much about investing in self-care,
drinking the water, moving your body,
and all of those things,
as you're going through the heart work,
you're processing all of this trauma
and these things that have been stored up in your body.
It's been stored up in your cells specifically,
and as you are processing,
that stuff is going to get released,
and we need it to flush through your body, okay?
We need it to come out of there.
There are a lot of times where some of you,
and when I, I think it's important to say this as well,
I almost forgot,
I am not minimizing the struggles
that people have with anxiety.
I wanna be real clear on that
because some people specifically have anxiety disorders,
dread disorders,
they really, really struggle with this stuff.
It's very real to them.
I used to have like panic attacks
about actual fear of the dark.
It took me a while to overcome that stuff.
I had to train my brain, I had to train my body.
I had to cause, teach my body to submit to truth.
Was it easy?
No, but was it possible?
Yes.
Now, everybody has a different process.
Some people have a longer journey in that healing process.
We believe that all anxiety and fear
does come from the pain and the trauma and the lies.
So even those of us that have massive anxiety,
it typically is coming from fragmentation
and brokenness in our spirit and soul.
Okay?
The more that you heal,
the more you're going to be able to overcome those things.
As I've healed over the years,
I absolutely do not have the level of body trigger responses
that I had years ago.
Do I still on occasion?
Yes, I'd be lying if I told you no,
but they are way different
and I'm able to recognize them so much faster
and help my body process them so much quicker.
One of the things I pray a lot,
I still do, and I did years ago,
I pray and I ask the Lord to heal me and my cells,
to actually cause my body
to regenerate cells supernaturally.
I want new cells,
because when I was a kid,
I don't think it's fair that my cells
had to store up all kinds of toxins
because of unhealthy choices of other people
that put me through abuse and all of those kinds of things.
And so I believe my dad,
he loves me and he wants me
to have an accelerated healing process.
And so that's something I've been praying and believing.
So I just want to put that out there for you all.
We can pray big, we can believe big,
and I can believe for supernatural healing.
And if you want to as well, you can as well.
So for some of you that have felt stuck
in certain trigger patterns for a long time,
in addition to the heart work,
that might be something you want to pray,
because there might be some things stored up in there
that your body just doesn't know how to get rid of
on its own.
So you need supernatural heart physician
and healing surgeon, which is God himself.
So you all, he can do surgery while you sleep.
He can, all right?
Any areas where you feel stuck.
So if you find yourself saying, I'm stuck here,
I'm stuck here, I just can't move past this,
or this is a problem area,
I just keep having the same issue,
I keep attracting the same kind of guy,
or this afternoon we had a young lady that was sharing,
she tends to have these struggles with women in particular,
and maintaining relationships with women,
which is a lie the enemy is trying to convince her of.
And as we unpacked it, she was like, oh yeah,
I did just have breakthrough like yesterday at church.
She was looking around and she had all these women around her
and she was having good relationship with them.
And so God is healing her and helping her see
that that is not true for her.
It never was, but even more so now she's gaining revelation
that she is able to make healthy relationships and maintain.
them. So when we have these areas though, when we feel stuck or these problem
areas, they are signals to us that there are lies that we're believing in those
areas. Okay? So I want you to think about areas where you have felt stuck, problem
areas, and start asking the Lord to reveal the lies that you've been
believing in those areas specifically. I'm going to read a little bit to you
from the Heartwork book. I clarified this today, I never thought about it. The only
book I'll ever read from during our sessions is the Heartwork book. I'm never
gonna read from another book, but some people always ask, what book are you
reading from? Always the Heartwork, ladies. We're here for Heartwork and that's
that's my sole focus. But I'm gonna read, it's a little bit about the biggest
lie that we tend to believe, and I think this is super important and regarding
the fear that some of you face as well. This is what it says, the biggest lie
that you may believe in life is that your life is normal. Many people that
live broken lives believe that it's reasonable to live that way. They have
inherited that emotional debt or trauma from their family and they think it's
normal to be overweight and unhappy, to be unfaithful, to be in a relationship
where someone mistreats you, or to be sick all the time. They think it's okay
to have massive amounts of debt and spend all their energy trying to figure
out how to pay the bills, or even more severe deception, like it's normal to
abuse and hurt others or yourself. I knew someone like that, they thought it was
normal to be molested by family members because it's all they had ever known.
When they were confronted by an outsider about the abuse, they said that happens
in everyone's family, doesn't it? No, it does not. Maybe you have been
confronted by people in your life, friends, co-workers, or even family that
are trying to get you to see how dysfunctional an area of your life has
become. I have done this for people over the years. Some people call it an
intervention. It's a reality check when someone is so deep in a lie that their
behavior has become dangerous to others or themselves. The desired outcome is
that that person will wake up and see what they are doing and ask for help. So,
have you been convinced that your life is normal? That the pain and the trauma
that you've been experiencing is normal? That when we overeat to hide our
feelings and stuff, the emotions that we actually have, that that's normal? It's
not. And so when we can actually admit that we're struggling there and start to
ask for help and start to ask for Lord, where did this begin? I know for me, I
learned how to stuff my feelings with food because I watched my mom and my
sister do it. They used to hide food in their bedrooms so that they could eat in
private when they were sad and depressed. And so whether I realized or not,
subconsciously, I knew they were hiding the food in their rooms. I knew my mom
and my sister were both very sad all the time. My mom didn't get out of bed a
lot when I was younger. I mean, she went to work, y'all. She did. She took care of us
in that regard. But on the weekends, some days she would literally never get up.
She'd just stay up there all day. And so we start to carry these things into our
adult lives, young adult life, you know, adult life. And we don't pause to think,
where did this start for me? How does that connect with fear? Well, fear, again,
is connected to the lies we believe because of the trauma that we've been
through. If we're not addressing the pain, we're going to do all different kinds of
things when we get triggered, potentially. I want you to pause and ask yourself
about, you know, that fear earlier I asked you to think about. I want you to now ask
yourself, what are the facts? What are the facts and what is true? I asked you to
start thinking about, like, how is the enemy trying to twist the truth to cause
you to believe his lie? But now I want you to think, what's the facts
about this? Because fear is false evidence appearing real. So what's real?
What's true? And we want to think on those things instead. And if we don't
know what the truth is, all we need to do is go to the Word of God. And I'm not
trying to simplify it, ladies, but it is genuinely your way forward. It is
the beacon of hope in life for you. The more you know the Word and know the
Father, most importantly, because that's who you're going to get to know, Jesus's
voice, the Father's voice, and the voice of the Holy Spirit, the more that you
read the Word, not out of law or checking off a list, but out of, like, man, I want
to get to know you, Father. Jesus, I want to, I want to understand what it was like
like for you when you lived on this earth and died for me?
When we pray those kinds of prayers,
things begin to change from the inside out.
We can overcome fears the more we heal
and the more we become rooted
in God's love and faithfulness to us.
Are you someone who tends to always wait
for the other shoe to drop?
Maybe you tend to think of the worst case scenario
instead of the best case scenario.
Maybe you hear a siren and you automatically think
something happened to someone that you love.
Can I see hands?
Does everyone know how to raise a digital hand?
I showed everyone this afternoon
because I think it does help.
If you don't know, it's totally okay.
But if you click on the bottom of your screen
whether or tap on it, it might be under reactions for you.
Mine's right, literally, I see raise hand.
It might be under more.
So everybody has them under different things
but those should be there for you.
Yeah, there you go.
Okay, so I just wanna make sure everyone knew how to do it.
So here's what I want you.
Okay, let me lower hands.
I'll have you all, I can do it for you.
And then I'm gonna ask you a question.
And if this is something you experience,
I want you to raise your hand, okay?
Does someone ever text you?
I'm sorry, do you ever text someone else?
Do you ever text, wait until I finish all the way
because we all text, right?
When you text someone else, do you ever struggle
when they don't respond in the timeframe
you think that they should with thoughts
like they are mad at me, they don't care about me,
they must be talking to someone else,
I'm not good enough, I'm not pretty enough.
Whatever the negative thought is,
do you tend to think of the worst case scenario?
Okay, we have a couple of you.
So these are all things built in fear, fear, fear.
And guess what?
Anxious attachment is birthed out of anxious thoughts
and partnering with those and not getting control of those.
And then before we know it,
we're struggling to attach securely
because we're anxious, anxious, anxious all the time.
We're so afraid.
And so I wanna encourage you all,
if this is something you struggle with,
just so you know, I'm a former struggler in this area.
So I'm saying that this is something
I struggled with as well.
I wanna encourage you this next week,
if you're texting with someone,
hopefully y'all aren't chatting with boys right now
because we ask you to press pause on that.
But even if it's with a friend, ladies, or family members,
because I think this happens with a lot of people now.
We notice it with my mother-in-law.
If we don't text her when she messages us,
she'll send us a message saying, hello,
which we don't like that.
Because sometimes we're literally on meetings
or this afternoon, I was on a live session.
She doesn't know what we're doing all the time,
but people don't have to know
what we're doing all the time.
We don't need to know what other people
are doing all the time.
We can rest and have a stillness of mind and just say,
I'm gonna believe the best
and they're gonna get back to me
when they're able to get back to me.
So here's the thing, I want to challenge you this week.
If you struggle in this area, set a timer
and do not text them back until that timer goes off.
Even if they don't text you when you want them to.
Now, if they text you and you feel like you wanna respond
before that timer goes off, okay.
But some of you actually need to wait
until after that timer goes off
because you need to practice self-control in this area.
And the more we practice self-control
regarding our anxious thoughts
and feeling like we always have to respond
to everybody all the way.
Y'all, especially because I do online ministry all the time,
this is something I always, like even lately,
I used to get really like, oh man,
I don't want any Facebook messages
like where it shows I have unread messages
or unread text messages.
And it's such a big thing because I get so many messages.
And the last few months, the Lord is like,
do not respond to that until you need to.
You don't even need to open that and look at that.
And He's like nudging me to not let that stress me out.
And so again, it's in different levels as we go.
For you right now, it might be one relationship,
but who knows why God's gonna teach you
to train yourself with this one person right now,
why it might benefit you even more so later on.
So be thinking about that as you're practicing this week.
Now that goes kind of with that fear and anxiety,
but I've just felt led to say that
and put that out there for those of you that wanna try it.
So I want you to think about
what are your thoughts rooted in?
Your typical thoughts.
Again, we started this last week.
So if you're just joining us, this is your first week.
If you wanna listen to that.
Replay from last week, you're more than welcome to,
but don't feel like you have to.
But it also goes with Jackie's Supernatural Saturday
and what we're talking about tonight.
But what are your thoughts rooted in?
Are they rooted in fear, doubt, unbelief, pain, wounds,
anger, resentment, or are they rooted in hope,
life, joy, peace?
The Bible says things that are noble, worthy,
lovely, of good report,
things that are above only and not beneath.
Well, above only, a lot of us, you know, for me,
I automatically think of heaven.
Now, Jackie talks about heaven's all around us,
but for me, I just tend to think it's up there.
I don't know why, that just feels normal to me.
But what does heaven think?
Are we thinking what heaven's thinking?
So often we're not, and so Father,
today help me to think more like heaven.
What's heaven saying about my ex-husband who cheated on me?
What's heaven saying about my friend who left?
Does it mean we have to let them back into our lives?
No, but what we do need to do is take care of our hearts
regarding these people and situations.
There's hope for us.
1 John 4, 18 says,
"'There is no fear in love.
"'Dread does not exist there,
"'but perfect, complete, full-grown love drives out fear,
"'because fear involves the expectation
"'of divine punishment.
"'So the one who is afraid of God's judgment
"'is not perfected in love,
"'has not grown into a sufficient understanding
"'of his love.'"
That's the amplified version of that scripture.
So ladies, if we're struggling with fear,
here's the harsh reality.
We don't know God's love enough.
We need to know it more.
It doesn't mean we're a failure,
it just means, hey, Lord, I need an upgrade
in my understanding of your love for me,
who you are as love, as my defender,
as my protector, as my provider.
God, that you're good, that you're kind,
that you're faithful.
You're not the way that the world tells me that you are,
or my experiences that have convinced me that you're bad
and life is bad and life is always gonna suck and be hard.
The enemy wants us to park in those camps,
but we have an opportunity, ladies,
to shift out of all of those lies
and the ways of thinking and the patterns
that we've allowed to overcome our hearts
and decide that we are going to go
in a different direction from this day forward.
Will it always be easy?
No, but will it be worth it?
Yes.
John 3.16 says,
As I get you prepared for the breakout session,
I'm gonna read some lyrics from a song for you.
I encourage you to listen to this song this week.
It's called, Fear is a Liar.
It's by Zach Williams.
It's powerful, you all.
In the song, he's talking about the devil
when he says he, just so everyone can hear him.
He says,
Fear is a liar.
Just so everyone's on the same page, okay?
And this is what he says.
When he told you you're not good enough.
When he told you, you're not right.
When he told you, you're not strong enough
to put up a good fight.
When he told you, you're not worthy.
When he told you you're not loved.
When he told you, you're not beautiful.
You'll never be enough.
Fear, he is a liar,
he will take your breath,
stop you in your steps.
Fear, he is a liar.
He will rob your rest,
steal your happiness,
cast your fear in the fire
because fear, he is a liar.
When he told you that you were troubled,
you'll forever be alone.
When he told you that you should run away,
that you'll never find a home.
Some of you, he's told you
that you'll never find a spirit mate.
When he told you, you were dirty
and you should be ashamed.
When he told you that you could,
that you could, I'm sorry.
When he told you, you could be the one
that grace could never change.
Oh, fear, he is a liar.
He will take your breath,
stop you in your steps.
Fear, he is a liar.
He will rob your rest,
steal your happiness,
cast your fear in the fire
because fear, he is a liar.
Ladies, fear the enemy,
the devourer of our souls.
He is trying to cause you to live in fear
and dread of your life,
of living in this world.
Yes, there's things that happen all the time
in this world that are not good.
I faced hurricanes for the first time
in this last year.
We moved here at the end of June.
Was that scary?
Absolutely.
But you know what?
God was my peace and firm foundation.
the whole time. Sincerely, when the enemy was trying to breed anxiety and fear and panic,
I had to choose which way I was going to go. Whatever your situation is, you can choose
tonight which way you're going to go. Your question for breakout is, what fear are you
going to ask God to help you with tonight? What fear are you going to ask God to help
you with tonight? I'm going to get these breakout rooms ready. I'm going to give you all seven
minutes. If you've got three, that gives you plenty of time. If you have extra time after
you've answered the question, you can get to know each other a little bit. Where are
you from? What led you here? Maybe you could share even a when you had this last week.
Where do you feel led? Here are the rooms for you. Go ahead and click to join those.
You have seven minutes, ladies. Click to join.
Father, just thank you so much for every one of these ladies. We thank you, God, for
helping us to recognize the enemy, the one that comes to kill, steal, and destroy. Thank
you, God, that you came to give us life and give it to us more abundantly. I pray that
you'll help us tonight to hear what your Spirit is saying, even while they're in the breakout
sessions, those that are here in the main room, those that are going to be watching
the replay. Father, help them to hear the whispers from your heart, the whispers that
say to be still and know that you are God in the midst of their circumstances and situations.
We thank you, Lord, that you would just continue to fan the flames of hunger and thirst for
your righteousness, for your word to know you, Lord, to grow in relationship with you
more in us every day. I thank you, Lord, that you'll continue to transform us by the
renewing of our minds, that all old things have passed away, and behold, everything has
become new in you. Help us to, Lord, lay aside every weight that so easily ensnares us and
press on toward the high calling of God for our lives. And if that's fear and anxiety,
that we would continue to choose to partner with you, Father, to discipline our minds,
to cast down the fearful thoughts, to cast down the anxious thoughts and make them obedient
to Jesus Christ, which is, as Jackie declared on Saturday, the fullness of his promise of
what he accomplished on the cross. So, Lord, help us to find the truth in your word that
overcomes those lies, to replace the lies with your truth. I thank you, Lord, that you
would just continue to prepare a table for us in the presence of our enemies. And so
many of us, our enemies have been fear and anxiety and panic and all these worry and
dread disorders that are so prevalent. It's been depression and oppression, but God, thank
you that you're helping us to be overcomers, kinsmen, redeemers, that you're rewriting
our stories and helping us to step further into the fullness of your plans and your promises
for us. We thank you that your word is yes and amen, God, that you're not a man that
you should lie, that you're not deceiving us, you're not dangling carrots in front of
us and leading us astray. But Lord, I thank you that with every step that we take in you,
that you're making us stronger, that you're refining us with fire and making us as new.
We thank you, Lord, that you would just continue to help us to perceive the new things that
you're doing in our lives, that you are bringing those rivers and the wasteland and streams
and the desert. Yes, Lord, we thank you that you are taking all of the ashes and turning
them around for beauty in our lives, just like I was praying earlier tonight about the
masterpiece that he's making in that tapestry that he's weaving in our lives, ladies, that
there's so many good things that he's doing and the ways that he's working and he's not
going to leave us in the middle. And what I mean by that is I just saw a picture of
like, I don't know why I always see it this way, but a dark tunnel and it always looks
like, it doesn't look like a train tunnel, but I always envision a train, but it kind
of looks like a tunnel, like a bridge where you would go under and maybe be in a carriage
or something like that that's in a park. And I typically view it that way, but it's not
like we're going through the tunnel.
tunnel and then on the middle of the tunnel where it's the darkest point potentially,
God's going to leave us there. No, He comes in and He illuminates the entire place and the whole
thing is lit up because Jesus Christ is the light of the world. And so what seemed dark to us,
what seemed fearful to us, as soon as we invite Jesus our Savior into those areas,
He can illuminate those situations and those feelings and help us to hear the truth.
Let's see here. I'm going to read Luke 12 too. It says,
everything hidden and covered up will soon be exposed for the fast aid is falling down and
nothing will be kept secret for long. Revelation 21.4 says He will wipe away every tear from their
eyes and eliminate death entirely. No one will mourn or weep any longer. The pain of wounds
will no longer exist for the old order has ceased. So Lord, we thank you that you would just continue
to heal us, redeem us, restore us. I thank you even right now that new thoughts would be imparted
into minds, bodies, spirits, souls, that you would help us to receive fresh revelation and insight
from heaven. Lord, help us to hear what your spirit is saying louder than any voice of the enemy.
I thank you, Lord,
that you are the repairer of the breach, the breach where the enemy came in and he tried to
bring destruction, doubt, unbelief, discouragement, disease. We thank you, God, that you sent Jesus to
be the one that would be the bridge for us to come to you, that we can be in relationship with
you, we can receive that divine healing and anointing in a fresh way even tonight.
We thank you that you would help us, Lord, to trust that you have a good plan and you are going to see
us all the way through to the other side. I'm going to read Colossians 3, 13 through 14 in the
message version here. It says, So chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe
God picked out for you, compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even
tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive us quickly and
completely as the master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love.
That's your basic all-purpose garment. Never be without it. Lord, I thank you that you would help
us to love the unlovable and to walk with a heart of forgiveness, a heart of flesh that's soft and
pliable to you. Father, help us to have teachable hearts and not hearts that are stony and hardened
and walls up and offended and bitter. Lord, help us to believe the best in people. Help us to be
aware of the things that we're doing and saying and thinking instead of just going forward and
allowing the enemy to use us as a vessel to bring any kind of destruction or disruption.
We thank you for continuing to speak the truth to us in love. Ephesians 4, 27 in the amplified
version says, Do not give a place to the enemy. Don't give him legal access to your life and your
family and do not give the devil an opportunity to lead you into sin by holding a grudge or
nurturing anger or harboring resentment or cultivating bitterness. Lord, help us to be quick
to forgive, quick to extend grace for the same way that we judge others or extend grace to others,
also the same way we will receive it. So help us to be daughters of light, allowing Jesus to come
fully.
Then pouring that out to other people and allowing his love to shine through. Welcome back, ladies.
So glad to have you back. For those that are new, I pray for you all and speak life and try to speak
all kinds of truth while you're in breakouts so that those that hear the replay can hear that.
Feel free to always go back and listen to that anytime if you want. Glenda, do you mean what
verse I was reading? I think it was Ephesians 4, 27. I forget where I was at in the book that I was
reading it from, but I think that's the one it was. Okay, so welcome back. Who is willing to
share with the whole group what you shared in your private breakout group? I am. Okay, Michelle,
go ahead and then I'll go. Hi. Okay, thank you. I didn't know how to do the hand thing, so I'll
just wave my hand. I didn't realize that fear had different categories or different names.
specifically. And so when you asked me that, just before we
were coming on, I really had to calm down because I was getting
very anxious. And I don't know where that was coming from, but
explaining it now. But the fear that I know that I did deal with
or dealt with is the unknown, not knowing things, unable to
get an answer to things that I feel like I should know. Okay, I
said it. Yeah, got it out.
You did great. Okay, let me ask you a question, Michelle. You
said you felt anxious before you came on tonight. Yes, you
normally feel anxious before you get on with groups of people or
no. Okay. So I don't think it's a surprise that I was teaching
and I'm talking tonight about fear and anxiety. Are there any
other times that anxiety like you felt that same kind of thing
before?
I want to say last, last week, I wasn't with this past week. I
wasn't feeling well at all. And when you talked about the fear
and, and the anxiety, I have a doctor's meeting. So all of
that, all of the memories, all of the you're overweight, you're
never going to be where you need to be. The blood work is my
pressure was sky high this week. So this whole week, I've been
pretty anxious. Okay.
Out of the ordinary.
Yeah. And then on the fear of the unknown. What kind of does
that pair with what you just told us? Or are there other
times this has shown up for you in specific areas?
I want to say, I can go back as far as I can remember that from
a little girl of just not knowing the answer to things. I
want to go back to elementary school way back. Just not
Yeah, yeah, it's okay. Um, so not knowing the answer to like a
question the teacher was asking? Yes. Did you ever get in front
in trouble or embarrassed in front of other people because
you didn't know the answer to something?
I'm probably just the fact that you were pointed out as one that
did not know.
Okay. Yeah. You ever feel that way at home or only at school?
Uh, probably all my life when I can go back. Well, you know,
just thinking that's been an issue that I've had problems
with all all my life. I could I can say.
Okay. Do you have siblings that you were compared to as a kid?
No. No, I don't think we were compared until much later in
life when I got saved.
Okay. Okay, that's good to know. So I the first thing I would say
is number one, you know that this happened in school. So
that's one of the first places I believe that God's going to want
to come in and heal those areas. Specifically, you know, asking
the Lord to reveal to you was there a specific time that you
were embarrassed when you didn't know the answer. So you know, in
general, you remember feeling that way. But we want to ask the
Lord to reveal specific times and memories and trust in his
timing to reveal it because he will reveal it and bring it to
the surface when it's the right time. And when he does, I want
to encourage you to do a forgiveness prayer sheet towards
that teacher or even if there are any kids that you know, that
really stand out that laughed or gave you a hard time, anything
like that, associated around being a little girl and not
knowing the answer and feeling some kind of negative feeling
because you didn't know the answer. Fear of the unknown can
also partner into the whole what if this what if I don't know,
you know, what if I you know, someone said this afternoon, it
was such a great question, I think was actually Lisa, Lisa,
and I was coaching her on, you know, she had said that she's
not not been in a relationship dating before. So she had been
afraid of making a mistake. And so I said, What if you don't?
What if you don't make a mistake, you know, and we want
to look at the opposite side when fear is presenting. Again,
fear is a liar, the enemy, the devil is a liar. He's presenting
these fears to us. But what if what's the opposite? What's the
opposite of that? What if something happens? And it goes?
Well, what if even if we made mistakes in the past, this time,
we're not going to blow past red flags, this time, we're going to
hear what the Holy Spirit's saying about someone and we're
going to listen to that. And for those of you that might not be
sure if you hear God correctly, because you felt like God was
leading you before and you chose someone unhealthy. I've been
there. Did that to know a lot of things not good, but I did a lot
of things really good, too. Okay, I think there's balance in
everything. And we learn as we go, hopefully, in the point of
why I said that is that sometimes because we think God
was leading us towards
certain person, we start to doubt our ability to hear him correctly.
But for me, I'm not saying this is the way for you, but for me, when I was in
that prior situation, when I really stepped back and asked the Lord some
things, he definitely was revealing red flags to me and I blew past them, you all.
God did not fully lead me into that relationship with that person.
I met that person.
I saw things.
I saw some good stuff for a little while.
And then I saw a lot of not great stuff and I just kept going.
I got entangled with the kiddos and I loved them.
And so I just kept going.
So anyways, that's not necessarily what Michelle was talking about, but that came
up in my spirit from our thing this afternoon, the fear of the unknown.
We can also face our fears, ladies.
We can say, okay, what if the worst thing ever happens and not believing that it
will, but God can help you no matter what happened.
Yeah.
And so Michelle, we'll be praying for you about the visits with the
doctor and all of these things.
But I encourage you to maybe sit down tonight, even if it's for five, like set
a timer, maybe not five minutes, three minutes on your phone, set a timer and
just do a brain dump of all the negative things that the enemy has been trying to
torment you with regarding this health stuff.
And then ask God to show you the truth that he wants you to stand on.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I'm so glad you shared.
Thank you.
You all do a great job.
It's always, it's always lovely to hear you.
Rebecca, go ahead.
Hi.
Okay.
This is interesting that this is this week, because this last week has literally
been torture in this department for me, like, um, massive amounts of fear.
Mindset, battling mindset, nightmares even.
Um, and I say today, my biggest fear I'd like to give up is the fear of rejection
and loss, um, just once in fraud, really like to get over that, um, and quit with,
even if I see something good and I, and I get a promise and I get confirmation
on that or whatever, um, I, it's quickly fear of losing it or fine or fear, like
fear of not getting it or fear of once I get it, losing it.
So, um, that's yeah.
The rejection is definitely a big one for me.
Okay.
So, um, when you were talking about the fear and the nightmares from this
past week, I lost you on my screen now.
I know you went away for a second too.
Okay.
I haven't had this thought any of the times I've coached you since you joined,
but this came up in my spirit.
So I just want to put it out there.
Have you ever prayed and asked the Lord if there's anything in your
home that isn't good to have there?
Have you ever had anybody pray over your home or any of those kinds of things?
Um, well, I anointed my home and prayed over my home and, um, and everything.
I am really cautious.
I'll continue.
I that's a good question to always bring up.
Um, this is a newer home.
When I moved in, I purposely tried really hard not to bring in a lot.
Um, most everything I have in here was new.
Although I keep going through old stuff from my husband, um, late
husband, um, through the storage unit.
But even that I have to do little bits at a time.
So I do have some stuff now in my home since sorting through that, that stuff
and trying to know how to get rid of a lot of it.
Um, but though I will, I will pray about that for sure.
I know that I, these have been really intense this week.
Like, well, it makes sense now that you said, how often are you going through
the boxes of the stuff with your, your late husband?
Recently, not at all because, um, it's bad weather.
And so I haven't really had a chance to get to the storage unit and bring it in.
Um, so recently, no, I can't think of anything specific, but you know, I'm
open to the Holy spirit to lead me if there's something, just pray into that.
I don't know.
Again, I've never had that thought anytime I've ever been coaching you.
And so it might amount to nothing and I'm totally okay with that, but I'd
rather put it out there and let you pray about, you did say also to that
resonated today was on relationships.
So I have a boss that's new.
That's right over me.
This, um, and we get along really, really well.
And so recently she's invited me out to just get some dinner.
Um, and she's trying to help me kind of in my position at work in this new job
that I have, this new career that.
I'm doing. And I kind of had a check in my spirit, I will be
honest of whether or not there's too much alignment there that's
happening at this moment. Because she opened up about some
of her just opened up about her some of her experiences with her
current husband. So I don't know if that has something to do with
it. But she hasn't given me anything for my home. So I'll
think on it.
Yeah, maybe because she's your boss, you might want to have
boundaries there with what she's sharing with you. That might be
the only thing I would encourage you but definitely pray into
just anything regarding your home. Because I know you've
battled, you know, and sometimes, as I've said before,
the enemy will just attack us in our sleep state. But you've
been battling with this for a while. And so that's what's
causing me to wonder if there's something else kind of tangible
that you just don't know right now. And you know, I don't want
to go too far into that. But pray and see what God reveals
and then just pray about the boss. Just make sure the Lord,
you know, you're following him regarding boundaries. And if
this will be good practice, this is something else just that
comes up is that, you know, even when we practice in situations
like this, ladies with saying, Hey, you know, thank you for
sharing, but probably going forward, I'm, I would be more
comfortable if we don't talk about our private life
situations with each other, just so we can keep healthy
boundaries in our work environment. And they might not
like that. Okay, so I'm just gonna put that out there. But
that is healthy for you as a person, since that is your boss.
Yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right. Rebecca, thanks for sharing.
I'll be praying for you about that as well. Thank you. You're
welcome. Rio, go ahead.
Hi. Hi. One of the things that I shared this evening was having
insecurity about my body. And so I don't really talk much about
it. It's kind of something that I think I silently struggle
with, because I'm pretty, like confident and outspoken in a lot
of other areas of my life. But I, I feel like it's coming a
lot more to the surface where it's like, you know, I think
that's something that God really wants to heal in my life. And I
was sharing with the ladies that I'm Filipino. So I don't know
if it's the same for other cultures. But whenever they say
hi to you, sometimes they don't even say hi. You know, the first
thing they say is, oh, you got fat. It's like, you just saw me
last week. And then last week, you told me I was skinny, you
know, they like say, they always talk about your
appearance. And yeah, I mean, I think I thought my way through
becoming really overweight. I was like, about 200 pounds, that
was my heaviest. And then I lost, I lost about 45 pounds of
that for a long time. And then I've always been kind of been
around that weight. And so but it's hard for me to today, like
when people tell me you're so beautiful, you know, Rio, you're
not big. And I always say, Oh, yeah, yeah. But whenever I look
at myself in the mirror, I look so big, that I don't wear my
size clothes. And, and my sister would always tell me like, stop
it. Or why do you keep getting extra large, extra, extra large
clothes? Like you're, you're like a medium? Like, why do you
keep getting big clothes? And one, it's not just because I
like the look of an oversized look sometimes. But sometimes
it's just because I don't like when clothes when when my body
can feel the clothes, because I feel like I have to hide it,
you know. But I don't know. So I'm really good. So okay, let me
ask you this. And again, ladies, anytime I ask you these
questions, if you don't know the answer right now, it's totally
fine. But, you know, I'm curious, when is the first time
you ever remember feeling this way about your body? Do you
remember?
Yeah, I mean, gosh, ever since I was young, I'm not from my mom,
not from my mom or my sister. And, and I grew up with them.
There are a lot of instances, my dad, whenever I would visit my
dad, because my parents were divorced since I was five.
Whenever I visit my dad, and when I was a young teenager, I
started having acne. And it was genetic from both sides of my
parents. And whenever he would pick us up from the airport or
something, the first thing he would say is, what's wrong with
your face? You know? And, yeah, I mean, I lived with
with a ton of family members when I moved from Guam
to Virginia, and there was like seven other families
in the same household.
And a lot of them, especially the women,
they would always nitpick at my body.
But I was athletic growing up,
so I wasn't like the size zero, size two kind of Asian.
And I never was.
I think the last time I was like that
was when I was like five.
So have you ever processed forgiving those women
in that house for saying those things to you
or your dad for saying what's wrong with your face
or any other mean things that people said to you
that connected to some form
of your physical appearance or being?
Yeah, you know, now that I'm thinking about it,
I think I have forgiven.
I think I have, but maybe not completely.
I think what I've done is I've just kind of pushed through,
just saying, I'm not like that, I'm like this.
Like I am God's daughter.
Everything he makes is beautiful.
He did not make a mistake with me,
but I think it's really going back and saying,
I forgive that person.
Because sometimes when I go back home to Virginia,
sometimes I feel a little bit anxious about,
oh my gosh, how is my weight right now?
Am I gonna go home?
Maybe I should detox before I get there
because they're all gonna be like,
oh Rio, you've lost so much weight,
but just a little bit more, you would be beautiful.
So something else too, I love,
I appreciate everything you're sharing.
Something else I also think as you're processing
and sharing out loud is,
I'm gonna guess you need to feel it too.
Yeah, I do push through.
How did it make you feel
when these people said this stuff to you?
You don't wanna stay there forever,
but to feel it, we need to feel the feels
so that God can heal the feelings
that go in underneath all of this other stuff
that cause our body to keep score.
So it doesn't mean
that you haven't forgiven those people.
Again, ladies, I want you to remember,
sometimes we can forgive people,
but God will bring a certain thing up.
And the first thing you said tonight,
when I asked you that was your dad
picking you up from the airport and then those women.
And so to me, there's probably another layer
of healing and forgiveness that God is wanting to do
connected to those areas.
So I would encourage you to use the forgiveness prayer sheet
and process and pray and specifically ask God,
what are the specific things I need to forgive my dad for,
starting with the one that you said tonight
about things he said to you
or ways that he treated you
regarding your body in particular.
You might have other things to forgive him for
at some point, but starting with the body
and then these women or anyone else along your path
where there were things that were said or done
that caused you to not feel like you were enough
or that something was wrong with your body
and the way that you were made.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Ladies, it can be tough because, you know,
we don't always wanna feel the pain,
but I promise if you will lean into the pain
for a little bit and let God come and meet you,
let Jesus come into those moments with you
and feel it with you,
he will help set you free in that time as well.
Thank you for sharing that with us, Rio.
Diana, hi.
Hey there, Bethany.
How are you?
Can you hear me okay?
I'm doing all right.
How are you?
Good.
Now I shared something different with my group,
but as I got in here, it like surfaced a fear,
especially in this context of being in this program
has been men.
Like I have this very strange fear of men,
like they're going to attack me,
like just when I trust them,
they're going to try to harm me in some way
or even like finding somebody online,
they're gonna be like a serial,
like something, and it's just,
I know people who have met people online.
I don't know why that is so prevalent in my mind.
When it comes to men,
I haven't ever been harmed physically by a man,
nobody in my family at all.
So I don't know where that's stemming
from this like fear of men.
Do you watch any kind of shows, crime shows about,
you know, stuff like that?
I don't, but it always surfaces that like,
when I was younger,
my mom always used to call me in for like 2020
and all those specials to make sure
that I would know what to do just in case.
And it was when I was like 10, 11, 12,
like I was very young and she would always call me in.
Even, you know, the Oprah specials,
every time it was like, how did she escape?
Like those kinds of things.
things. So and I know it was out of a heart for safety, but I
felt like I related to you in the beginning. I am an empath. I
know that very well. And I have a spirit of discernment, but I
feel like it gets twisted sometimes. And then it just ends
up being fear of people.
Yeah, so fear, what I wrote down just now, just so y'all know, I
don't know if I've said this for a long time. But if y'all see me
looking down a lot, it's because I'm writing. I'm processing as
you're talking. But I wrote down fear embedded when you are
young, like the word embedded in particular. So, you know, any
anything, if we think about something that is planted deep
in, it's embedded in there. And so it might be, it might have
started when your mom was watching those shows and called
you in to watch those, trying to build, you know, knowledge into
you, but it caused fear. It might even be from something
you're not remembering that was before that. It doesn't mean
that something bad happened to you. But there are a lot of
things where, you know, as children, I can remember when
Michaela, my oldest spiritual daughter, this one time, we were
just watching the news. And this news update came on about if I
hope I don't trigger anyone that loves pets. I love pets, too.
But I think this will make sense when I tell the story. Someone
took an animal and, you know, dropped it over a bridge and
harmed the animal. And Michaela saw the description of this and,
and the news, and it just broke her, like so deeply broke her.
And she was traumatized literally from seeing that on
the news. And so this is a real thing. And so that's why I
encourage you all even be careful about, you know, of
course, stay up to date on the news. But, you know, if you are
afraid a lot, you might not want to sit and watch the news,
you might want to just read a news article to get the
information and keep it short. But I would pray into that,
Diana and ask the Lord to reveal if there's any other thing, you
know, before like when you were younger, that when your mom
would show you those, you know, shows that it fed into that
thing that was already there, or did it start there, he'll show
you if that was the initial time. And the other side of,
okay,
I'm gonna say sometimes I wonder, because my mom is also a
narcissist. And so sometimes I wonder if that even is like the
trust, like my inability to trust comes from the fact that
she's so up and down. That I just I don't know, but I don't
know why it would manifest in relationships with men because I
don't have issues with women. So yeah,
yeah. So a couple things, just in I understand why I used to
call my ex a narcissist, too. But one of the things we do in
this community is we do separate people, the things they struggle
with, from identifying them as something. So I want to
encourage everybody, you're not wrong for saying that a lot of
people say that, but I just it was a good teachable moment. And
so mom struggles with narcissism. Okay, so that's the
way I would encourage you to shift in that. But one of the
things with that, ladies is, um, you know, you may even want
to pray Diana to see if there were things that your mom said
about men that you took into your spirit, you know, and just
pray regarding. Even though it was your mom, and she struggles
with that there can be a lot of control and manipulation and all
that. And that can cause a lot of fear as well. And, you know,
so just yeah, keep praying into that. Definitely forgive mom, if
there needs to be forgiveness regarding things still. And
let's see where God leads you in this. Okay. So good. Alright,
ladies, we're at 914. So I'm going to try to keep I'm going
to still go to Jennifer, Stephanie. Oh, someone just took
their hand down. There was someone else there. But oh,
there you are, Sophia. So we'll just try to keep it short, brief
and powerful. And because I do want to go ahead and get you all
in. Jennifer, go ahead. Jennifer, if you're talking,
it's muted. Okay, we'll go to Stephanie and come back.
Hello. Hi, this is my first. Oh, awesome. Thank you. I'll try to
keep it brief. What I shared with the ladies on the in my
group. It's kind of intermingled together. But the fears that I'm
asking the Lord's help with are never going to get married.
married, not wanted, not worthy, and that I'll never have a successful relationship.
So that's the bundling of those together that I'm asking God's help with.
Okay.
So has anyone ever said those things to you or are these just things that you have fearful
thoughts about?
They've been said to me.
Okay.
Who said those to you?
The not overtly said, but the not wanted I've
gotten from the absence of my dad not being around, and the not wanted just my brother
from a young age, just different things that he would say, and then that I'll never have,
that I'll be a bad wife and mother, ex-boyfriends.
Okay.
So basically what we need to really work on is rewiring, like your brain essentially,
and the way that you're thinking about yourself because of things other people said.
Again, I'm plugging Jackie's thing a lot, but it was so good.
If you didn't hear it Saturday, definitely she was talking in there about how other people
would even say things to us and then we would start living into those and we would partner
with the things that the enemy was saying to us through those people that were harmful.
And so really starting to assess like, where did this thought come from?
And asking God to bring truth into those situations and circumstances, obviously healing from
those prior circumstances with your dad, your brother, you know, exes is super important
in this process.
Stephanie, is this your first week as well?
Yes.
I signed up not this past Saturday, but the Saturday before, and I've just been just kind
of plugging away.
That's fine.
So, yeah.
That's awesome.
The reason I asked is it kind of helps me know content wise how much kind of where you're
at and things like that.
As you continue to go through, I believe there's going to be more layers probably revealed
about dad and brother.
Okay.
So just journal anything that comes up.
Don't minimize any thought.
Even if it seems like in the moment, small, like, oh, this is no big deal.
Write it down anyways, because the Lord is bringing it up for a purpose.
He doesn't want it to stay in your soul and spirit, and he wants you to be able to move
forward.
And that will also prepare you for the forgiveness prayer sheet then as well.
Okay.
Ladies, so many of these things are intermingled because of things people have said to us done
to us.
A lot of thoughts that we have today were not our original thoughts.
They weren't.
I believe when we were born, you know, like Adam's day, the intention was for us to have
thoughts of just complete bliss and pureness.
We were born into, you know, sin.
And so that wasn't maybe what we experienced, but that was the intention for us.
And so I do believe God wants to help us get back there more and more and more to have
these minds that are so full of peace and tranquility, the essence of heaven, you know,
the awe and wonder of what does it look like and feel like.
Even when you look around at something beautiful, like, just sit and think about when you take
that beauty in, like, imagine that being in your mind.
Not just something that you're seeing, but like, that that is what's in your mind.
That right now, Lord, as I'm seeing, I don't know, I live by the ocean.
So I think of that, like, I love the way the ocean, you know, goes in and out and the
peace of a sunset.
And just thinking about that peace coming into my mind, man, everything gets better.
Doesn't it?
Maybe you don't like that, but maybe your scenery is something else.
Maybe it's by a river, a stream that's just like a trickle and it's very calming and peaceful.
I don't know what your thing is, but figuring out what that thing is for you, what brings
you peace to center yourself on a tough day, to just sit and think on those places that
brought you so much beauty and wonder can really help you in great ways, ladies.
Stephanie, thanks again for sharing.
Jennifer, go ahead.
So my fear that recently I feel like I've gotten in touch with is the fear of not being
worthy of pursuit, especially by a man.
And I. And I think that's why I tend to operate a lot in like a more masculine way, and I
think I've operated like that for so long.
I usually become the pursuer. In relationships, even in even in
friendships, I initiate I pursue, I do all the work. And I think
that deep inside, I'm so afraid that I'm not worthy of being
pursued.
So tell me more about the worthy aspect. What is where does that
come from for you?
Um, because I, so my 22, I was married for 22 years, and I did
not feel pursued at all. In that, even from the beginning.
Where does the unworthiness come from, though?
I don't know. It's a I think it's a lie that probably got
lodged in me as a child.
Um, do you remember the first time you felt unworthy of love?
Because that's really what you're saying.
I've never felt worthy of love.
Okay. So ladies, when we have this kind of stuff, this is core
where we want to invite the Holy Spirit and invite Jesus to come
into our timeline in our story, and reveal to us the first time
we did not feel loved. So even though we're talking about
unworthy, feeling unworthy, that really the opposite of that is
you are worthy, but you didn't feel loved. And at some point,
there was probably abandonment in there that caused the
unworthiness to take root. And so, you know, abandonment can
look in a lot of different ways, ladies, it can also be neglect.
A lot of people don't think about abandonment like that it
can be like, things that people, you know, just normal things,
parenting, or even guardians or friends or whatever, that they
would do for one another. And then, you know, when they don't,
we believe the lie that, you know, we're unlovable, which
then translates into unworthy of pursuit of someone or unworthy
of someone's time. Typically, when we when we lean into the
masculine side of things as well, there's some level of I
can't trust men. So pray into those, I want to encourage you
to as you pray, ladies, if I've given you kind of some things to
run with this week and pray into definitely come in and do a post
on them as you process. And it might not be we might not have
the answers this week. But when you get them come back in and
post in the group, because most of you will probably need to
unpack those things more. Okay. And that's what we're here for.
We're here to help you keep unpacking these things. So I
would encourage you to pray about, you know, when's the
first time you didn't feel that you could trust a man? And see
what comes up there as well. Because it's probably the
marriage, but I'm gonna I'm gonna guess it's probably way
before that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you for sharing. I'm so
sorry to hear about what happened and praying for you and
you are absolutely worthy. God makes us all worthy ladies and
in and of itself, you know, any of us are able as we learn how
to heal to receive the divine feminine and activate it. So
we'll be we'll be talking about that the more that you go
through this journey, but practicing implementing the
divine feminine ladies can just be, you know, a lot of simple
things letting men help you. So Jennifer, in the next few weeks,
practice letting men help you even if you don't think you need
the help. Okay. Yeah. And ladies, it really does take
practice, especially like I was good. I can do I can I'm pretty
self sufficient. I can carry my bags. I can carry, you know,
open doors for myself. I can I can do all the things I can
carry lots of bags. I'm pretty strong. I can fix things in the
house. I can, you know, I just I operate and function because I
had to when I was young, and do a lot of things. But I don't
have to. I don't have to. And so I had to practice letting people
help me. And even still doing that, as I talked about, maybe
that was last week. So we can practice letting people help us.
Jennifer, great job. Sofia, go ahead.
Hi, everyone. It's also my first time here. But what I wanted to
share was kind of something similar that was shared earlier,
I think it was from Diana about the men part. And I actually had
something last night that I thought I wasn't planning to
share. But anyways, I'll keep it short. Last night, I got
approached in the grocery store. And it was like around, it was
already after dark. And I thought that was always kind of
one thing I thought would be cool is if I ever got approached
in a grocery store, like that would be the dream, right. And
so
I did yesterday and I actually it was not good. I was not flattered. I was like I ended up being
like afraid like is he going to stop me like he asked me for my phone number and then I always
think the worst and he pulled out his phone and he's like here's my number and he put his phone
kind of close to mine because I was like well I don't get my phone number out then I'm thinking
the worst like oh he got my information or I don't know I just started going down this rabbit hole
and then I like cut my grocery trip short and I had a friend call me because we were almost
going to go out at the same time like it was a whole thing and I um literally went to bed
feeling afraid like I had a nauseous stump like feeling in my stomach about the whole deal and I
was like why why did I feel so afraid of this person coming up to me and asking for my phone
number and um you know I've been I have been um trapped like somebody put a tracker on my car
twice um two different men in my life and those two men I I have contact with still so like
these are people that I haven't like they don't go away kind of thing but I felt like I never
thought that would be an issue by somebody I didn't know and I I think I still have some
something what I'm trying to figure out is what part of that is from the trauma that I've been
through and what part of it is discernment to know like no maybe this was a bad feeling that
came from God you know or is this just my past and I don't know how to separate the two of like
when someone actually does approach me and it's for a good thing and I take it wrong you know
yeah I do let me help you a little bit um because at first I am like okay how do we tell the
difference I think the biggest thing is God isn't going to make you afraid but he will give you
wisdom and discernment that someone is not safe does that make sense so the and and here's here's
where that discernment and that uh line for me comes into play you went home and went to bed
and still felt fear that to me is different than discerning that somebody at the store
may not have been a healthy person to be around or you know to give your number two um and so
I think the biggest thing here is especially because you mentioned that you had two people
that put trackers on your car they both were men um I'm gonna say this guy at the store triggered
fear from those prior situations and um you mentioned you still have contact with these
people is there a reason you have contact with them well one I have kids with so that's never
going to change um and um the other one is just we've made amends um but he has an ex-boyfriend but
he we try to be friends but he just I don't know he's just always been in the background somehow
like he doesn't ever go away okay you said it so well because what I was kind of picking up on
is you've got this kind of storyline in the background that men aren't safe and you can't
trust them to bring you safety and protection but instead they're tracking you down and so that's
why your mind went into all those fearful thoughts in the store because you're going through heart
work and you're going to start this stuff that even though you've been through it you've processed
some of it before it's going to start to percolate to the surface and God's going to help
you know other areas that you need to heal from from those situations um not telling you what to
do but honestly I would really pray about whether or not even though you made amends with the ex
you have no kids with him correct so to me to me that seems like a pretty toxic thing that he did
so why leave that door open you might want to pray about that and just see if the Lord encourages you
to completely close that door so that he's not just hanging out in the background there anymore
yeah ladies sometimes we need to close doors all the way even if someone has made amends if they
are not you know at some point we're not a safe person and we used to date them in order to move
forward we have to make room I don't I don't associate with any of my exes anymore now if
you have a kid with someone that's totally different okay because you have to um but this
guy you don't and so you could totally cut ties with him yeah and again you pray about that and
see what God shows you but I definitely think the more that you can distance yourself from people
like that that that would be a good thing and then okay ladies it's
If you need to log off, absolutely feel free to do so.
I am gonna go through our control content.
We won't do another breakout
just because those were really good
and I wanted to get all the ladies an opportunity to speak.
But I am gonna, it's not a lot of content
so I wanna go ahead and give it to you.
Before anyone logs off though,
I wanna give you your activations for this week.
So hang with me for just a minute.
The activation this week is called letting go.
And here's what I'm gonna encourage you all to do.
I want you to pray and make a list of things
that you are going to commit to letting go of.
So from 2024 and even in the beginning of January of 25,
these are things that are not serving you well at all.
And God doesn't want you to take them
further into 2025 with you.
So you're gonna agree to release these things
and let them go.
And some of the ways that I'm gonna encourage you
to symbolize this letting go process
is two things.
You can pick whichever one you feel the most led to do,
or if you come up with a different idea,
you can totally do that.
But these are two that I know,
I've done them with people a lot and they really work.
Number one is a balloon release.
Okay, go get a balloon.
I wouldn't encourage you to attach your note
that you've written on to the balloon
just because if that ends up in your neighbor's yard,
you know, or someone that you know,
they're gonna read your thing and make,
I don't know that they would know you,
but again, maybe attach something to it
that represents the thing that you're letting go, okay?
The other aspect is to make that list
and watch it burn, ladies.
Light it on fire in a safe place, of course,
and watch it burn.
And I'm gonna encourage you all to take some photos
to capture these moments.
Some people, I've had ladies take a video of things before.
I love telling the story.
This just happened recently.
I told it this afternoon.
One of the ladies that did this the last time around
that I issued this activation,
she was praying as she was lighting her paper on fire
and the paper was just sitting there burning.
And as soon as she said, Lord, I'm letting this go,
I agree with you, I'm letting this go.
And as soon as she said, letting it go,
literally the wind picked up
and it took the ashes and blew them away.
It's so supernatural, so cool.
I don't know if yours will go the same way,
but I wanna encourage you,
like these activations impact people in all different ways.
Some people struggle to light it on fire.
Some people struggle to actually release the balloons
in that moment.
And even feeling that and processing
why we don't maybe feel comfortable
letting something go is important.
It's an important part of your process, okay?
So I wanna make sure you have that.
Here's the content on the control.
So many times we think that we're not control freaks,
ladies, we think that, no, this doesn't apply to me.
I don't control anything, I'm good.
And I wanna encourage you just to be really open,
be really open to asking the Lord,
is there any area I struggle to control things?
Is there any area where I even operate in OCD's tendencies
to bring control to a situation
when I feel like things are out of control?
It doesn't mean we can't have those tendencies, ladies,
but a lot of times those happen
because we're trying to regain control in a situation.
In the book, it says, never let them see you sweat.
I don't know how many people reading this will remember
the antiperspirant commercial with the tagline,
never let them see you sweat.
Or in other words, stay unemotional, be in control
and never let them see your weakness.
If we are going to get free to be our real selves,
we have to throw out the cultural lies.
Being weak is okay.
It's okay to admit that you don't have it all together
and that you've made mistakes.
I will tell you this, I'll show you mine
if you show me yours.
Y'all, I'll show you mine if you show me yours
in this group, in this community,
we can show each other our stuff.
It's not about our highlight reels,
but it's about our blooper reels too.
Where did we make mistakes?
I wanna see all the skeletons in your closet.
You guys don't have to go into every gory detail,
but if there's something you need to confess,
here's the place to do it.
I promise, women have confessed things
they've never told anybody ever before in this community,
and it's been safe and we've protected them
and we've loved them and they were able to let things go
and move on for the rest of their life
without carrying that.
Your wounds, scars, weaknesses,
the bodies in the trunk of your car,
go ahead and bring them all out.
Somebody needs to see them.
Let's declare war on a culture.
angles and filters, auto-tune in Photoshop because real freedom is found in vulnerability.
Real freedom is found in vulnerability, ladies. Control is just an illusion anyways.
It's often a misleading image. It's something that's misleading us intellectually to cause us
to feel that we've got it all together and if we do it this way or if we let, you know, don't
let that happen that everything will always go just fine. Healthy people who walk in victory
don't try to control other people. Is there anyone in your life right now that you are trying to
control? They don't know, like a lot of times people that walk in control we don't know that
it's actually not our job to control other people, to control outcomes of situations,
conversations. What areas of your life do you struggle to let go of control? People, places,
things, perceptions, outcome, maybe finances. Maybe some of you like have kids that are spending
money they shouldn't. I don't know about my girls, love them but they're making some decisions I
would not want them to make but I just keep reminding myself I made some bad decisions too
when I was young and God has got me here. We can let go ladies. Can we interject lovingly if God
opens that door? Absolutely but we don't always have to give our advice to people that are not
asking for it. Are you currently trying to control things to avoid pain, to avoid getting hurt
because you're afraid of loss which someone talked about that earlier, Rebecca, you know she's fear of
loss and the reality is the enemy is trying to convince you that if you go through pain you're
not going to make it and that's not true. Are you trying to keep people where you want them so that
they can't hurt you? If we are doing any of these things ladies this is not living in abundance.
This is not living the good good life that God has for us. God has so much more for us and guess what
when we live free and we're not trying to control our life and everything in it other people live
more free too. It's amazing and you're going to enjoy your life so much more truly. Here are some
things that we we can have control of. Our beliefs. So what are your values? What are your beliefs?
That's all we have control over. Our responses versus a reaction. Ladies so often in our society
people are reacting so quick. Everybody's mad zero to 180 and I've done this before myself.
I'm like why am I getting so mad so fast? What's going on here? Well there was some hurt there that
I hadn't dealt with yet and I needed to look at that. Are you a quick reactor? Not a responder
there. I said reactor where you're just blowing a top really quick. You want to think about that
and ask the Lord to reveal what's the hurt underneath of there. Angers, hurts, bodyguard.
So some kind of hurt is under that surface. Boundaries we can control as well. One of the
things we need to have here though is balance because some people use boundaries so much that
they create walls and they go overboard with self-protection. So for example some one of
the things I said this afternoon is some people don't leave their home very much
because they're afraid and these are real things and it's happening more and more and more that
young folks, older folks, everybody of every age you know we experienced COVID and shutdown. We
pulled away from people because we felt like we were told we had to and some people experienced
you know massive hard things because of COVID. Lost people. So of course fear and all that but even
more than that just life happening but we don't need to shut down and shut people out. We can
actually practice coming into community and connecting and you can do that even here in this
group and then some of you will go on into the other phases and you'll start getting to meet
people in person because we have people all around the world that are a part of this program. It's
incredible. I want to encourage you to lean into in the days ahead that you are being God defended
and embraced in his love. Isaiah 26 3 says this, you will keep in perfect peace those
whose minds are steadfast, which means stayed upon.
you, being God, because they trust in you.
He will keep us in perfect peace as we keep our minds stayed upon Him, as we
think on things that are true, noble, lovely, and of good report, things
that are above only and not beneath. When we think about who God is,
when I sit and think about God as love, God as peace, God as good, as faithful,
it changes my perspective of things. So tonight, ladies, I want to encourage
you to yield control, that you would lean into the supernatural
surrender that we learned about last week and wave the white flag, concede,
let go, and let God help you. You don't have to control things to get
the outcome that's best for your life. Actually, oftentimes when we try to
control things, we actually tend to lead ourselves into
unhealthy things. Laura said, what type of stuff to let
go of? Well, that's where you need to ask the Lord,
what do I need to let go of? So for example,
some of you might need to let go of a relationship,
you know, that's not serving you. Some of you might need to let go of grief
and the sackcloth, you know, the Bible talks about
after people have grieved for a certain amount of time, it doesn't mean they can't
still feel sad when they think about the loss of that
person, but sackcloth is different.
There is grief and then there's deep grief
where people just really struggle to come out of it.
Some people grieve the loss of their former husband
and they want a spirit mate, but because they are
grieving in that place and the enemy has convinced them that it's
actually not good for them to move forward, even though they won't say it
out loud, they feel guilty for moving forward.
Those are the kind of things we can leave behind,
leave behind regrets for mistakes that you've made, whatever,
whatever it is that you personally need to leave behind. Maybe it's a negative
negative mindsets, limiting belief systems and orphan mentalities
that are not serving you.
Yeah, Sarah said, I need to let go of the fear of rejection and approval of man.
That's so good. We are praying for you, ladies. We're so
glad to be on this journey with you. God is stirring.
I can see him just even as I'm talking and saying things, ladies. I know that
he's stirring and he's doing something really amazing in you.
I want you to think about, as I start to pray,
right now, the image in your head of Jesus sitting at the right hand of the
father and he's interceding for you
by name. Not just the group, but you.
And he's cheering you on and he's believing
that you can step into the victory that he's already won for you,
one step at a time. You don't have to accomplish the whole thing
today. Just one step. So father, I just thank you right now
for your victory. I thank you that you died on the cross.
You allowed your body to be broken and your blood to be shed for the forgiveness
of our sins, for our freedom, for our healing, for our redemption, to make a way
for us to be one with you as you are one with the father. I thank you that you
enabled us to become overcomers, that you
gave us the pathway forward, that your word
declares that you will be a lamp unto our feet and a light onto our path.
God, I thank you that you'll, yes Lord, that you will take our feet off of
pathways of pain and put our feet onto pathways that lead to you,
that Lord will run towards you and not be afraid of you.
Lord, where the ladies in this group have any level of fear regarding man, I
ask you to reveal areas for healing for them
so that they can process those things and step into the truth. God, that you
would show them all the ways that you've been defending them and protecting them
all along. Lord, ways that even that you showed up
and brought victory and truth and hope in
desperate times. Lord, I thank you that you would just continue to
just open our eyes and the understanding that we have
to see your greater truth more in this week ahead. We thank you for your head,
your protection around us, where the enemy has come in with a spirit
of fear in Jesus' name. Tonight I bind and I break the spirit of
fear off of us, the spirit of anxiety and panic, worry and
dread disorders in Jesus' name, that they have to go
and they cannot habitate and get rooted into our spirits any longer. I thank you,
Father, that you would release the spirit in Jesus' name
of love and of power and of a sound mind.
That we will walk in your truth and know your truth and be made whole this night and every day forward in Jesus name
Amen ladies. He's working
I encourage you that that scripture that we don't have a spirit of fear
But we have a spirit of love and of power and of a sound mind ladies
That was the scripture I declared every day over myself to overcome my fear of the dark
Genuinely, I used to have fear come on me because I got abused in the basement
And when I would go up the stairs from the basement when it would be dark
I would feel like I needed to run
And then run in other parts of my house because people were looking in the windows. That's what the enemy was telling me
And that was when I was young and that happened again when I was in my 20s over and over again
I would be walking up the stairs and I would feel this fear come on me
And the lord started saying to me
resist it
And I just start I just started praying and declaring that's I bet my last name was stanko back then
I bethenny stanko do not have a spirit of fear
But I have a spirit of love and of power and of a sound mind. I am not afraid satan
I am not afraid I have a spirit of fear. I have a spirit of love and of power and of a sound mind
I would just every step I did not run
I would not let myself
run
I walked up every one of those steps and I walked in peace
Ladies that took time, but it was possible. So whatever it is that you're facing it is possible for you
too
God bless you all. I hope you have an amazing night. I can't wait to see you in the group
We love you, and we're so glad that you're a part of this community. Good night, everyone
Bye