WEBVTT

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All right. Welcome, guys, to this is Men's Heart Check-in, February 24th, 2025. So we

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hit record tonight. It's really good that we did, because sometimes we miss it. We're

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all good. Look at Josh on there. He's walking. He's exercising. Look at that.

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Hey, Josh. I think I just came back from the gym myself.

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Are you in the gym or are you in a Walmart? Either way, it's good, Josh. We're thumbs

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up on that right there. Yeah. Love it. Getting after it, getting moving. Yeah, I'm doing

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good. Just as a little update, just so you know, I'm doing better with my exercise and

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health routine. Just continue to do that, making better choices. And I'm down about

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five pounds, five, six pounds. I went down, and then I went back up, and then I went down

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again. So that's kind of like normal, I guess, what they say. And then so we're doing a little

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bit more of an intentional fast this week. It's not a complete fast, but I mean, it's

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fasting kind of solids. We're just doing a liquid sort of a juice thing, a little bit of a,

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call it a cleanse, call it a fast, call it whatever. But it's definitely something that's

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helping us roll back all this stuff. So that's good. And it's funny, because Jackie's one of

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those creatures that she enjoys doing things with other people. If she wants to do something,

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she wants somebody to do it with her. I want somebody to go to the ball with me. I want

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somebody to go to... She's very communal like that. And so I'm the first person in line for

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all of her shenanigans. So it's kind of like, will you do this with me? Will you do something?

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I'm like, most of the time I say yes, but sometimes I'm just like, look,

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you got to find some friends or something. I can't do everything little thing with you.

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I got to say no, but I don't say no. I just, I don't know. I act like she goes,

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oh, you don't want to do it. I'm like, well, babe, I would, but you need to do some things

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with some other folks. So anyway, but we're doing this together.

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And the style of when I work out, I don't like to be social when I work out. I like to just get in

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there. I like to go inward. I like focus, almost like meditative type thing. I like to go in. I

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like to concentrate on what I'm doing. Other people are in there chatting. They're trying

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to socialize. I'm like, will you just hush? It's just annoying to me.

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I had the experience of, I humored my brother and went to the gym with him for once. And it

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was kind of nice, different. I'm usually in the zone like you are, but he was showing me some

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stuff and we'll see how we work that out in the future. Yeah. It's one thing if somebody's talking

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about what you're doing and like showing you some different things, whatever, versus someone

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that's in there just likes to talk and they just like to chatter and they just like joke around.

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And I'm like, bro, like, you're just knocking me off the whole thing. Like, I feel like it's a

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serious thing to be here, you know, type thing. And I'm not trying to be overly serious. You know

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me, I'm not really like a serious dude, but at that time it just kind of feels like if I'm going

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to get anything out of this, I have to like concentrate. I feel like I'm doing, you know,

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something important. So guys, what is going on this week? We have a good crowd here. Probably

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some others that join us and hop on here. Well, I've got some good news on your heart. What do

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you got questions with? What are your wins this week? I've got a win. Andy, go ahead.

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So a friend of mine told me about a dating app that I never heard of before. It's called

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the Unplugged Network. And it's a really good place because it's like, it's all traditional

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Christians on there. And, and like, they're even open to people who are into conspiracy theories.

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And it's just like the best place ever. And I'm really hitting it off with a lot of people on

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there. Like they lead in their marketing with like, Hey, we're open to conspiracy theories.

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Just so you know, well, it's not part of their marketing, but there is a part on your profile

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where they actually ask you like one to five, how much of a conspiracy theorist are you? Oh,

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no, actually zero to five. Yeah. Zero to five. It's like zero.

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because I pretty much accept everything as it looks.

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You know, in this modern age, that would be maybe

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a demographic that actually might be helpful

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in some instances.

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I don't necessarily know if it's, you know,

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but it might actually be helpful to kind of, you know,

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match people or have some sort of compatibility on that

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is definitely an issue.

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It's definitely a thing, you know.

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Yeah, because-

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Andy, are you a seven?

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I'm a four out of five.

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Oh, wow.

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You don't think the government's batting 1,000?

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There's a lot of places we could go with that,

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but the other thing-

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I'm mostly a medical conspiracy theorist.

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I'm a, I basically, like, don't agree with, like,

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anything conventional view

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as far as scientifically speaking.

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So this unplugged network,

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so it's just something that you joined

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or you could join or you heard about?

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I joined it, yeah.

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And I actually have been,

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I actually started talking with the woman on there.

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Like, there's a spot where you can post, like,

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your picture and kind of give a bio.

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And this one woman was an Orthodox Christian.

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She's actually just joining it.

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So it's kind of interesting.

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I started communicating with her.

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We'll see how it goes.

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I'm not, I don't know if it'll go good or bad,

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but we'll see.

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Is this mostly just text, like, texting or, like,

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you know, typing?

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It's texting right now.

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Like, I mean, we just started.

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So, I mean, how soon after,

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how many texts until I should say,

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okay, we have to do...

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Well, I mean, I think our standard idea

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is that you don't want to really make any, like,

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connection over just text.

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I mean, you want to make a connection,

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but an initial enough connection to say,

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hey, I'd really like to talk to you.

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I'd really like to hear your voice.

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I think, you know, it'd be better if we connected.

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So it's kind of like, in a very natural way,

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it's not, you know, I sent 10 texts,

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so therefore I can't text anymore.

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It's not like that.

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It's just more like, hey, you know, we texted long enough.

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You'd want to try to get to that conversation

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sooner than later.

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Yeah, and I agree with that.

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So, like, do you have, like, a specific guideline

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of when, like, is the right time?

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No, it just has to be soon.

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Okay.

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I think on the relationship levels video.

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I wouldn't text more than, you know, 24 hours

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or, you know, 48 hours,

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unless it just wasn't logistically possible

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to get on the phone or a Zoom or whatever.

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You know, some people have plans

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and they say, I can't do that till Wednesday.

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All right, well, it's Monday and fine.

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That's, you know, Wednesday's fine.

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But I would definitely,

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if you're interested in making a connection

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to find out or even just to have the conversation,

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I think it's always best to try to have that

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as soon as possible.

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Yeah, so, good.

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You're going to say, David,

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I think on the relationship levels video,

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it says within the three times of chatting online

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or within a two-week period.

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Yeah, definitely.

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And again, that comes back to just sort of a logistical thing

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or somebody who is, like, ready to do that.

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You know, sometimes the other person

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may not be ready to go there.

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Three to five business days, look at that.

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Yeah, standard delivery time, four to six weeks.

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No, I think that's a good guideline.

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Definitely, you know, as soon as possible.

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So as soon as you and the other person

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might be ready for that.

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And then again, you know,

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barring any logistical things that need to be required,

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you know, I don't have time.

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I literally am busy until, you know, like Thursday

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is the next time I'm available.

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What if she says that she's not ready

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to communicate video yet?

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Like, because I have had women say that before.

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You just have to trust her and whatever.

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But I wouldn't continue on having this texting

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going back and forth for longer than a week or more,

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you know, if the person's not ready,

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because then that just seems like, well, you know, like,

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hey, we're going to have this conversation or not,

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you know, type thing.

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Where you want to be like, you know,

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hey, I'm not trying to push you in anything,

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but you know, I'm here to make connections.

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I want to talk to people, meet people.

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And it's just very difficult to do that over text.

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And people who would understand that would be normal

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and be going like, yeah, okay, sure.

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You know, but sometimes people are intimidated.

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You have no idea if this is this woman's first time

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on this, you know, or first time even trying

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to make a connection with people.

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So there could be some of that.

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So you never know.

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They try to lead them into that as best as possible

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without being, you know, super, super, super pushy

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and a jerk about it.

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So, yeah.

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Andy, I have some advice for you though, on that front.

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Go ahead, Daniel.

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So there's a, um, there's a, he was Chris Voss.

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He was a hostage negotiator for the FBI and he wrote a book on negotiating

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called never split the difference.

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So, so when you ask this woman to transition to like a phone

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call or a video chat, formulate it.

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So he says, start with yes, or I'm sorry, start with no, you want to

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get to a no as soon as possible.

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And there's this, there's a psychology around, um, when someone is able to say

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no, they feel like they have their power still.

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And so what you want to do is you want to frame the question so that no.

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Is, is yes.

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And what I mean by that is you want to say, I would say something like this.

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I would say, Hey, I've really enjoyed our text conversations.

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I'd be, I'd, I'd love to hear your voice and, and have a phone call.

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Uh, would you be opposed to us having a call or would you be

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opposed to me getting your number?

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And then the answer is no, here's my number.

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Instead of saying, can I have your number?

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Because then she has to say yes.

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And so it's easier psychologically.

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And she feels like she still has more control.

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If you ask a question where no gets you the actual response that you want.

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Wow.

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That's interesting.

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Wow.

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That's kind of cool.

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I never thought about that.

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Yeah.

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So, so yeah, I love that.

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Yeah.

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So frame it that way.

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Would you be opposed to me getting your number or, or something like that?

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But I will, I will say like on the apps, there were, I think there were a couple

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of women that I wound up going out with that wanted, um, and I, and I'm thinking

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of one in particular, she wanted to, she actually wanted to stay on text for like,

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it felt like a couple of weeks, but she was very cautious.

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So, you know, this, this woman, especially if she's new to the dating

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apps and, and like the online thing, she may be very cautious right out the gate.

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Yeah.

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And you may have to give her, you may just have to give her

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some more time and be patient.

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And she was kind of far away.

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So, and making a woman feel safe is, is super attractive as well.

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Super attractive.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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If you can, if you can address that and be super like, um, I say honorable

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because that's sort of the Christian version, but you know, just, um, not

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be so nice that you're relegated as a nice guy, but you're just courteous.

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You know, it's really cool to be able to like, um, one of the greatest,

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um, characteristics of men is meekness.

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And, uh, Moses was this Moses was known for his meekness.

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And I learned this little phrase in college because lots of times in our

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modern world, meekness could be translated as weakness, and I learned

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this in college, a little phrase.

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It's kind of cute.

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It goes, meekness is not weakness.

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It's power under control.

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So that's actually what my dad taught me growing up.

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Yeah.

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It's so good.

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So when you, when you're trying to be like honorable and kind and generous

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and like very tread lightly with a woman, you want to do it in a way to where it

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doesn't come across as you're just this nice guy who will just would go with

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00:13:18.800 --> 00:13:25.320
anything you want to show amount of power that you have, but your power is at bay.

240
00:13:25.320 --> 00:13:26.800
Your power is under control.

241
00:13:27.160 --> 00:13:30.600
I love the suggestion that Daniel had as far as like phrasing

242
00:13:30.600 --> 00:13:31.480
your questions that way.

243
00:13:31.480 --> 00:13:36.360
That's part of like, what you say matters, like, and even how you say it.

244
00:13:36.800 --> 00:13:41.640
So it's, you know, it's helpful to show, you can show a woman some

245
00:13:41.640 --> 00:13:49.520
strength and some, some security and safety by, you know, sometimes like

246
00:13:49.520 --> 00:13:53.000
making suggestions, like if you're going to go out on a date, Hey, would you

247
00:13:53.000 --> 00:13:58.600
like to do this or would you like to do that, you know, you like, would you

248
00:13:58.600 --> 00:14:01.880
like to go to dinner or would you like to like, you know, whatever the plan is.

249
00:14:02.400 --> 00:14:08.400
That helps her to feel like, first of all, you've thought about what it is

250
00:14:08.400 --> 00:14:09.360
that we're going to do tonight.

251
00:14:09.880 --> 00:14:14.120
And you've thought of several things, not just one thing, you know, you're

252
00:14:14.120 --> 00:14:16.400
not trying to like, Hey, we're going to go to a movie and this is what we're

253
00:14:16.400 --> 00:14:18.480
doing because I want to go to a movie and that's what we're doing.

254
00:14:18.480 --> 00:14:21.320
We're doing a movie, you know, she's like, all right, I guess this guy

255
00:14:21.320 --> 00:14:25.680
wants to do a movie, you know, that that's turns off, but if you're like,

256
00:14:25.680 --> 00:14:29.120
Hey, I was thinking to you, you know, we could go to dinner or we could go to a

257
00:14:29.120 --> 00:14:31.640
movie, which one would you like to do?

258
00:14:32.800 --> 00:14:33.880
You just have to put that in there.

259
00:14:33.880 --> 00:14:35.640
Like, which one do they have to ask the question?

260
00:14:35.640 --> 00:14:39.280
Not necessarily like, well, we could do a movie or we could do dinner or

261
00:14:39.280 --> 00:14:40.240
we could do something else.

262
00:14:40.360 --> 00:14:42.080
That sounds undecisive.

263
00:14:42.760 --> 00:14:48.520
But if you're like, Hey, what would you like to do this or that, that gives her

264
00:14:48.520 --> 00:14:55.200
like, Oh, this guy is concerned or at least wanting to me to be involved.

265
00:14:55.600 --> 00:14:59.240
Give me a little, like, um, yeah, that's great.

266
00:14:59.240 --> 00:14:59.920
You know, like give me.

267
00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:05.840
choice, give me participating with it, plus it gives you the impression that you have thought

268
00:15:05.840 --> 00:15:12.000
about, hey, I'm ready to do this or I'm ready to do that. You know, which would you like to do?

269
00:15:12.560 --> 00:15:19.200
And then if she's an assertive woman and she's kind of like, you know, out of the box type of

270
00:15:19.200 --> 00:15:22.960
things, she might go, I don't like any of those. Why don't we do this? And you're like, okay.

271
00:15:24.560 --> 00:15:27.840
And what you've done is you now you've shown her that you're flexible

272
00:15:28.800 --> 00:15:34.480
and that you're still a man who has made up his mind, but you're willing to be flexible

273
00:15:34.480 --> 00:15:39.600
because you're like, hey, that sounds like fun. Then she's like, oh, this guy likes to have fun.

274
00:15:40.720 --> 00:15:42.800
Now you're winning on several different fronts.

275
00:15:45.280 --> 00:15:51.440
That make sense? Yep. Sounds good. I like that. That was a good little round robin.

276
00:15:51.440 --> 00:15:57.360
All right, guys, what else? I'm just reading.

277
00:16:00.800 --> 00:16:05.920
Yeah. Oh, I guess I got a win I can share.

278
00:16:07.440 --> 00:16:13.200
Shared it on Supernatural Saturday. Oh, yeah. I got a jump. I had to jump off for that or on

279
00:16:13.200 --> 00:16:19.040
Friday or whenever it was. Oh, no, I guess it was Friday. Yeah, it was Friday because I was up in

280
00:16:19.040 --> 00:16:29.200
the mountain then. Yeah. But it was. I got accepted to use the V.A. benefits to go away to

281
00:16:29.200 --> 00:16:37.360
school and a bunch of things have been lining up. From that, like they told me that they would

282
00:16:37.360 --> 00:16:45.360
retroactively induct me, so all the. Personal finances I paid out of pocket to go to school

283
00:16:45.360 --> 00:16:51.360
last year just to take two courses and see if I was dumb as a box of rocks or if I was going to be

284
00:16:51.360 --> 00:16:58.160
able to swim on my own. All the equipment that I used to get that all done, buying a new computer

285
00:16:59.680 --> 00:17:06.240
that they'd basically repay me for all of that. On the synopsis of, oh, you pretty much would

286
00:17:06.240 --> 00:17:12.480
have gotten this paid for if you had just done this a year ago. So kudos to you on doing it on

287
00:17:12.480 --> 00:17:20.000
your own. And yeah, you'll be repaid for this. So all that would allow me to get a new car and the

288
00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:28.480
exact car and specs that I was looking into. There is one car left on the lot in Vegas

289
00:17:29.760 --> 00:17:38.480
that I was going to go for. And then the home loan is like a. It's a simpler process, but at the

290
00:17:38.480 --> 00:17:44.560
same time, it's also a little bit of a headache, but it's just everything just feels more streamlined.

291
00:17:45.840 --> 00:17:54.000
Now, so awesome. So that's a win and then not a win, not a loss, just kind of like a funny moment

292
00:17:54.000 --> 00:18:01.120
in life of dating where. With with Facebook dating, I get kind of like confused as to who I've

293
00:18:01.120 --> 00:18:08.960
asked what question, you know, at what point. So like so like. I don't know if anyone else

294
00:18:08.960 --> 00:18:16.480
experienced this, but I've talked to like probably. 20 different women that all have liked me back

295
00:18:17.360 --> 00:18:24.480
in the last two weeks and kind of that same patiently waiting game and not trying to be

296
00:18:25.280 --> 00:18:31.920
pushy or anything. And I tell. Everyone the kind of the same story of this or that,

297
00:18:32.480 --> 00:18:35.840
like basic upfront, hey, just would like to go out and get to know you.

298
00:18:37.920 --> 00:18:45.920
And suggested like a hike around a park. Type of thing, and. I usually do something like, oh,

299
00:18:45.920 --> 00:18:50.640
let's go for coffee or let's do how about we do grocery shopping together? You know, it sprouts

300
00:18:50.640 --> 00:18:55.920
if you don't know what sprouts is, it's kind of like a farmer's market, but but out here it's

301
00:18:57.200 --> 00:19:04.160
an actual store. It's like. An eighth the size of Costco and so much less of a headache parking

302
00:19:04.160 --> 00:19:12.160
lots. Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Well, one gal, I apparently didn't ask that introductory date to

303
00:19:12.720 --> 00:19:17.040
and just went straight, apparently was going straight into the hey, let's go for a hike

304
00:19:17.040 --> 00:19:21.920
around the park. And I just got all capital letters back. It's like one of my pet peeves

305
00:19:21.920 --> 00:19:29.680
is someone that types in all capitals. And it was just like she's like, I need to see I need to meet

306
00:19:29.680 --> 00:19:34.880
you first and vet you so I know you're not a serial killer. And I'm like. And it was just like

307
00:19:34.880 --> 00:19:40.080
not a serial killer like Dexter. And I just kind of like focus on it and chuckle to myself. And I

308
00:19:40.080 --> 00:19:44.400
was like, I I kind of can't resist on this response because of the humor in it. I'm like,

309
00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:49.280
clearly you misunderstood the concept of that show because he was vetted by numerous people

310
00:19:49.280 --> 00:19:55.600
and was still a serial killer. You haven't heard back from her, but humor is humor.

311
00:19:56.720 --> 00:19:59.840
You know, you're like, by the way, the premise of the show.

312
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:02.360
Actually, just in case you missed that.

313
00:20:02.360 --> 00:20:03.840
Yeah.

314
00:20:03.840 --> 00:20:05.960
I couldn't, I just kept laughing at myself.

315
00:20:05.960 --> 00:20:08.520
I'm like, I already know this is not going to end up in a date,

316
00:20:08.520 --> 00:20:11.240
but whatever.

317
00:20:11.240 --> 00:20:15.120
In the two years of using that thing,

318
00:20:15.120 --> 00:20:21.800
I think only two people out of ballparking that,

319
00:20:21.800 --> 00:20:25.360
like 300 or 400 people that have liked me back

320
00:20:25.360 --> 00:20:29.440
have actually agreed to go out on a date

321
00:20:29.480 --> 00:20:32.120
or given me a phone number to message them back and forth

322
00:20:32.120 --> 00:20:34.080
because their bandwidth is a little more of,

323
00:20:34.080 --> 00:20:36.480
hey, I just want more time talking to you

324
00:20:36.480 --> 00:20:38.360
before I meet up in person.

325
00:20:38.360 --> 00:20:40.000
I'm like, yeah, it's fine.

326
00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:42.640
Sounds like you have better odds on the strip.

327
00:20:42.640 --> 00:20:44.600
Yeah, I don't want to go to the strip.

328
00:20:44.600 --> 00:20:47.840
I know that, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, it's funny.

329
00:20:47.840 --> 00:20:49.640
You brought that down to statistic

330
00:20:49.640 --> 00:20:50.760
and I was like, oh, that's interesting.

331
00:20:50.760 --> 00:20:53.600
Kind of like actually Vegas actually sounds more attractive

332
00:20:53.600 --> 00:20:58.000
than that kind of situation.

333
00:20:58.320 --> 00:21:00.840
Because I don't think it's you.

334
00:21:00.840 --> 00:21:03.600
No, I think it's more of that online,

335
00:21:03.600 --> 00:21:07.280
I think there's that online thing of,

336
00:21:07.280 --> 00:21:09.760
like in the sense of like so many people wanting to talk

337
00:21:09.760 --> 00:21:11.280
but not really wanting to meet up,

338
00:21:11.280 --> 00:21:14.480
I think it's more of a sense of,

339
00:21:14.480 --> 00:21:18.000
I think it was one of the paths levels of Jackie talks about,

340
00:21:18.000 --> 00:21:19.720
some people just want to feel validated

341
00:21:19.720 --> 00:21:22.320
or just want to feel like someone telling them

342
00:21:22.320 --> 00:21:25.200
they're pretty or something and then they ghost you.

343
00:21:25.280 --> 00:21:28.120
And it's just like, whatever, you know?

344
00:21:28.120 --> 00:21:28.960
Yeah.

345
00:21:28.960 --> 00:21:30.200
But I spent-

346
00:21:30.200 --> 00:21:32.840
Social media has connected us in so many ways

347
00:21:32.840 --> 00:21:34.600
but at the same way it disconnected us

348
00:21:34.600 --> 00:21:36.800
in so many other ways.

349
00:21:36.800 --> 00:21:37.960
So yeah. 100%.

350
00:21:37.960 --> 00:21:41.080
Inherent and kind of like what's going on.

351
00:21:41.080 --> 00:21:44.040
David, those are like the stats right there.

352
00:21:44.040 --> 00:21:45.520
It's like a 1%.

353
00:21:45.520 --> 00:21:49.480
Men have like a 1% date rate on connections,

354
00:21:49.480 --> 00:21:52.120
like actually materializing into a date.

355
00:21:53.080 --> 00:21:53.920
Wow.

356
00:21:53.920 --> 00:21:55.880
And then it's like one out of five of those

357
00:21:55.880 --> 00:21:57.240
will actually become a second date.

358
00:21:57.240 --> 00:21:58.240
So.

359
00:21:58.240 --> 00:21:59.160
Wow.

360
00:21:59.160 --> 00:22:01.120
Yeah, I went to a foreign country

361
00:22:01.120 --> 00:22:04.240
and visited a military buddy down in Columbia.

362
00:22:04.240 --> 00:22:07.120
I didn't even go for the purpose of dating.

363
00:22:07.120 --> 00:22:07.960
Yeah.

364
00:22:07.960 --> 00:22:09.040
But his wife set me up on a date

365
00:22:09.040 --> 00:22:10.480
and I went on a date every night.

366
00:22:10.480 --> 00:22:12.120
Not like anything that like led

367
00:22:12.120 --> 00:22:13.400
to any inappropriate behavior.

368
00:22:13.400 --> 00:22:15.240
Like one night we went with someone

369
00:22:15.240 --> 00:22:17.040
that wanted to go dancing at a club.

370
00:22:17.040 --> 00:22:17.880
Yeah.

371
00:22:17.880 --> 00:22:18.720
Like salsa dancing.

372
00:22:18.720 --> 00:22:22.480
And at the time I asked a girl out that was at the mall

373
00:22:22.480 --> 00:22:23.320
and I was just like,

374
00:22:23.320 --> 00:22:25.720
oh, hey, she's selling like Naruto stuff and I'm a nerd.

375
00:22:25.720 --> 00:22:27.840
So I enjoy anime and just started talking

376
00:22:27.840 --> 00:22:32.600
and then ended up taking one of those like cable car things

377
00:22:32.600 --> 00:22:37.400
that goes like 50 or 60 miles through like the tree line

378
00:22:37.400 --> 00:22:39.200
only to find out five minutes into the date

379
00:22:39.200 --> 00:22:41.720
she was terrified of enclosed spaces.

380
00:22:41.720 --> 00:22:42.560
Wow.

381
00:22:42.560 --> 00:22:43.400
Gosh.

382
00:22:43.400 --> 00:22:45.920
Those are some of the greatest setups

383
00:22:45.920 --> 00:22:49.160
is the wife of one of your friends.

384
00:22:49.160 --> 00:22:50.000
Yeah.

385
00:22:50.000 --> 00:22:55.000
Sometimes those are sometimes some of the most reliable.

386
00:22:57.520 --> 00:23:01.040
Thank you, Daniel, for those two first date ideas.

387
00:23:01.040 --> 00:23:01.880
I like those.

388
00:23:01.880 --> 00:23:02.960
Those are actually two good ones.

389
00:23:02.960 --> 00:23:06.640
Arcade is, that'd be kind of a cool one.

390
00:23:06.640 --> 00:23:10.880
Especially if you've got nostalgia like for video games.

391
00:23:10.880 --> 00:23:13.880
You get to see like if she can laugh and have fun

392
00:23:13.920 --> 00:23:16.920
and like, you know, there's like low stakes.

393
00:23:16.920 --> 00:23:18.800
There's always a bunch of variety and-

394
00:23:18.800 --> 00:23:20.280
If she's competitive.

395
00:23:20.280 --> 00:23:22.320
Yeah, you can see how competitive she is

396
00:23:22.320 --> 00:23:24.720
and maybe it's attractive, maybe not, you know.

397
00:23:24.720 --> 00:23:28.160
Is she gonna go nuts on Street Fighter II and destroy you?

398
00:23:28.160 --> 00:23:29.000
Never know.

399
00:23:29.000 --> 00:23:29.840
I mean, that'd be a huge great play.

400
00:23:29.840 --> 00:23:31.600
Some hidden skill and talent that she's like,

401
00:23:31.600 --> 00:23:34.800
yeah, I played this game once or twice.

402
00:23:34.800 --> 00:23:37.840
Or if she's like no fun at all, then now you know.

403
00:23:37.840 --> 00:23:39.840
Yeah, there's that.

404
00:23:39.840 --> 00:23:41.200
And so that's a good one.

405
00:23:41.200 --> 00:23:42.440
I like that.

406
00:23:42.440 --> 00:23:44.080
All right, who else has got something?

407
00:23:44.080 --> 00:23:45.960
Got a win, you got a question,

408
00:23:45.960 --> 00:23:48.000
got a concern, what's going on?

409
00:23:48.000 --> 00:23:50.040
Any things that we could,

410
00:23:50.040 --> 00:23:52.200
we'll pray at the end, of course.

411
00:23:52.200 --> 00:23:53.760
Just want to go around doing that too.

412
00:23:53.760 --> 00:23:55.960
But what's going on?

413
00:23:57.080 --> 00:23:58.560
I heard earlier too, David,

414
00:23:58.560 --> 00:24:01.080
you're kind of dealing with your mom

415
00:24:01.080 --> 00:24:02.800
and that situation, take care of her.

416
00:24:02.800 --> 00:24:04.040
So that's honorable, that's good.

417
00:24:04.040 --> 00:24:06.280
But we're lifting you up in that

418
00:24:06.280 --> 00:24:08.240
because sometimes that can be challenging

419
00:24:08.240 --> 00:24:10.120
depending on what the situation is.

420
00:24:10.120 --> 00:24:15.120
But she's not ill, is she?

421
00:24:15.360 --> 00:24:16.640
Is she ill or not?

422
00:24:16.640 --> 00:24:18.240
Well, she's getting more,

423
00:24:18.240 --> 00:24:20.080
the problem is she gets confused

424
00:24:20.080 --> 00:24:21.520
and then she messes up her medicine

425
00:24:21.520 --> 00:24:22.800
then doesn't take it.

426
00:24:22.800 --> 00:24:23.640
Oh, I see.

427
00:24:23.640 --> 00:24:25.160
And she ends up in a hop.

428
00:24:25.160 --> 00:24:26.240
And this has been a cycle

429
00:24:26.240 --> 00:24:27.960
that's getting more and more frequent

430
00:24:27.960 --> 00:24:29.400
over the last three years.

431
00:24:29.400 --> 00:24:30.240
I see.

432
00:24:30.240 --> 00:24:33.400
But I mean, she turned 80 back in June, so.

433
00:24:33.400 --> 00:24:35.880
Right, right, okay.

434
00:24:35.880 --> 00:24:38.640
Yeah, but one of the things that was encouraging,

435
00:24:38.680 --> 00:24:40.640
all of you were able to be

436
00:24:40.640 --> 00:24:42.520
on Sunday night's prophetic call,

437
00:24:43.760 --> 00:24:44.600
whether you were,

438
00:24:44.600 --> 00:24:46.360
or at least listen to the replay if you weren't,

439
00:24:46.360 --> 00:24:49.560
but there was even like a specific word

440
00:24:49.560 --> 00:24:53.720
for people that were taking care of aged parents

441
00:24:53.720 --> 00:24:56.080
or caregivers, basically.

442
00:24:56.080 --> 00:24:56.920
Yeah.

443
00:24:56.920 --> 00:25:00.080
So that, I mean, that piece was like really.

444
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:04.240
Specific for work, but um, there's a lot of good things on that. I mean

445
00:25:05.200 --> 00:25:07.200
I mean obviously most of the things that were shared were

446
00:25:07.760 --> 00:25:09.760
for most people so

447
00:25:10.480 --> 00:25:12.240
Yeah

448
00:25:12.240 --> 00:25:16.960
No, I I yeah, I mean i'm dealing with the same thing with my dad. He's 84

449
00:25:17.920 --> 00:25:19.920
um, he's living in a

450
00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:25.840
You know, um, he's living in a uh retired, you know situation no medical issues per se

451
00:25:26.560 --> 00:25:28.960
Um, but just the just the aging part of it, you know

452
00:25:29.040 --> 00:25:32.960
yeah, it can be challenging and I got to remind him of some things and here and there but

453
00:25:33.440 --> 00:25:38.480
He doesn't have a medical condition per se. But um, yeah, so I feel you on that. So

454
00:25:39.520 --> 00:25:41.520
uh, we just support you on that pray that

455
00:25:42.160 --> 00:25:45.440
things get clear and things, you know, you get some help with that as well and

456
00:25:46.480 --> 00:25:48.880
The grace and peace that goes along with that is too

457
00:25:50.400 --> 00:25:52.000
Um

458
00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:55.360
Did you have any I had a david? Oh david henshaw

459
00:25:56.720 --> 00:25:57.760
Okay

460
00:25:57.760 --> 00:25:59.760
Do you have anything else to share?

461
00:26:00.320 --> 00:26:05.200
Um, yeah, I it's just kind of a full pot and i'm just gonna be honest with you guys

462
00:26:05.280 --> 00:26:10.560
But like someone reached out to me on facebook after a friday call, but it was like weeks ago

463
00:26:11.360 --> 00:26:15.360
but like they're not really someone that I find attractive and

464
00:26:16.080 --> 00:26:20.640
Just to feel like just so they didn't feel like rejected like I accepted their friend request

465
00:26:20.640 --> 00:26:24.800
But then I never said anything and I think that actually caused more harm than good

466
00:26:24.880 --> 00:26:29.760
So like in the future, you know, i'm just still trying to navigate this stuff. Um

467
00:26:30.240 --> 00:26:32.640
Yeah, it's because you know, you need to do like more

468
00:26:33.200 --> 00:26:38.480
More hard work with that. The problem is like, you know, my last relationship started online with facebook

469
00:26:38.960 --> 00:26:44.400
And it turned out to be something that was not what I thought it was and it was yeah, etc

470
00:26:45.120 --> 00:26:47.120
So that's that's the problem

471
00:26:47.520 --> 00:26:48.960
um

472
00:26:48.960 --> 00:26:53.120
Yeah, so is that somebody within our community or somebody? Um,

473
00:26:54.880 --> 00:26:58.480
The most recent one somebody from our community or just somebody random on facebook

474
00:26:58.560 --> 00:27:02.880
Yeah, it was someone on our community. That's like very involved. They're almost on every call

475
00:27:03.440 --> 00:27:10.000
You know that are you know, both women as far as no late fridays potential saturday, you know

476
00:27:11.200 --> 00:27:12.880
um

477
00:27:12.880 --> 00:27:16.160
Yeah, they're at least on those every time sometimes they're on sunday nights as well

478
00:27:16.880 --> 00:27:19.280
I mean, you know accepting a facebook friend request

479
00:27:20.080 --> 00:27:21.360
even late

480
00:27:21.360 --> 00:27:26.880
Can just be a just a gesture of just like oh, hey, sorry, you know accepting this like it's no big deal

481
00:27:26.880 --> 00:27:29.700
It's like no commitment, you know, it's just another friend on facebook

482
00:27:30.480 --> 00:27:34.320
just so but but if you know, only if you think that you know

483
00:27:35.440 --> 00:27:37.440
It's something that um

484
00:27:38.400 --> 00:27:42.080
Uh, yeah, I have an issue with over reading things sometimes that's the other problem

485
00:27:42.160 --> 00:27:46.240
I mean I accepted it, but I never they never sent a message and I never sent a message back

486
00:27:46.320 --> 00:27:49.220
I just accepted the request so they didn't feel like they were rejected

487
00:27:49.380 --> 00:27:50.260
And

488
00:27:50.260 --> 00:27:55.380
Did you so you sent her the facebook request or the no, no, she sent it to me first

489
00:27:55.780 --> 00:27:58.500
She sent it to you and you did not accept it yet

490
00:27:59.620 --> 00:28:03.220
No, no, I have accepted it. Oh, I never said but I never said anything

491
00:28:03.300 --> 00:28:06.740
She never said any message any messages and I never sent any message back

492
00:28:07.540 --> 00:28:09.540
You just sent a friend request

493
00:28:09.860 --> 00:28:12.980
Okay. Yeah, maybe it's not maybe it's not an issue at this point

494
00:28:14.100 --> 00:28:16.100
Mike, what do you got? Yeah, there's your hand there

495
00:28:16.340 --> 00:28:22.100
So, um, I had a similar thing. Well, I mean I I don't know what to do like, you know

496
00:28:22.500 --> 00:28:26.420
That's why I think one of my biggest questions jack is what to do in those situations, right?

497
00:28:26.580 --> 00:28:29.940
but i've accepted I get a lot of facebook friend requests and

498
00:28:30.500 --> 00:28:33.620
a lot of people I just figure because i'm posting stuff for relationships that like

499
00:28:34.180 --> 00:28:36.500
They can glean on something that I post or whatever, you know

500
00:28:36.580 --> 00:28:40.900
So but I actually had somebody i'm like, you know, i'm really not interested and she's like, oh i'm not either

501
00:28:41.220 --> 00:28:46.420
She said just wanted to connect so, you know, I don't I don't know what the um

502
00:28:48.420 --> 00:28:54.660
Then there's been other ones where I was like, you know, um, i'm not interested but I really um, I feel honored right and so

503
00:28:55.300 --> 00:29:00.980
Yeah, but some um, we talked about like a week a week a week or two ago about a man being with the plan

504
00:29:01.620 --> 00:29:04.660
Right, like and you were sharing like with the two different date ideas like hey

505
00:29:05.300 --> 00:29:06.180
um

506
00:29:06.180 --> 00:29:10.580
The other thing I wanted to encourage you guys to be thinking ahead. I mean if you're in a marriage-minded place

507
00:29:11.220 --> 00:29:15.860
Um be putting away money for a ring. I have a ring fund. I have a I have a ring slash marriage fund

508
00:29:16.420 --> 00:29:18.580
Awesome. I got like 12 grand in it right now

509
00:29:19.380 --> 00:29:23.460
And should that come but you know, I just want to encourage you do it now

510
00:29:24.420 --> 00:29:25.540
Right and have it ready

511
00:29:25.540 --> 00:29:29.700
So when you do find somebody you can move and you're not and then and you because you

512
00:29:30.180 --> 00:29:32.580
Last thing you want to do is enter a relationship with debt

513
00:29:33.620 --> 00:29:39.140
Right or you know, and not every woman wants to wants a 68k ring who knows right like, you know, like

514
00:29:39.780 --> 00:29:42.500
But like you can use that to invest in your future marriage

515
00:29:43.140 --> 00:29:44.900
yeah, like but like

516
00:29:44.900 --> 00:29:48.740
Be a man with a plan and and plan ahead and like put the money aside

517
00:29:48.980 --> 00:29:52.100
I mean, even if you take it out of your have it direct deposit into a different thing

518
00:29:52.180 --> 00:29:53.780
So you never see it

519
00:29:53.780 --> 00:29:56.980
You know like and just and good idea. It's a good suggestion

520
00:29:57.860 --> 00:29:59.860
um, I will say that when in

521
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:07.120
In the situation when I met Jackie, I was not at the top of my game financially at the moment.

522
00:30:07.120 --> 00:30:11.760
I was driving a 94 Buick Century. I just got my cars repossessed the year before,

523
00:30:12.560 --> 00:30:17.280
going through bankruptcy, house went into foreclosure, all that kind of stuff.

524
00:30:18.800 --> 00:30:26.480
And that didn't seem to extremely bother her too much. She's just not that kind of a person that

525
00:30:27.440 --> 00:30:31.600
she leads with all that, I got to know all of your background, all that kind of stuff.

526
00:30:33.440 --> 00:30:40.720
But anyway, it was pretty interesting because there was a moment when we were getting to know

527
00:30:40.720 --> 00:30:45.840
each other. We'd already known each other for about eight months. And it was kind of that time

528
00:30:45.840 --> 00:30:51.840
where it's kind of like, hey, if we're going to move forward in this, there really isn't any reason

529
00:30:51.840 --> 00:30:57.120
to put it off. We didn't have any, it wasn't like we're going to plan this huge big wedding

530
00:30:57.120 --> 00:31:12.800
or anything like that. And she kind of got up the nerve to basically approach the, hey,

531
00:31:14.560 --> 00:31:19.600
is there an engagement coming soon type thing? She didn't say it like that. She just sort of

532
00:31:19.600 --> 00:31:29.360
indicated just very gentle, like girls do. And she was surprised by my answer. My answer,

533
00:31:29.360 --> 00:31:35.360
which was, yeah, I mean, I didn't say yes, we're going to get engaged or yes, I plan to ask you to

534
00:31:35.360 --> 00:31:45.680
marry me. But I just said, well, I have a ring. And she was like, oh, okay. She knew my financial

535
00:31:45.680 --> 00:31:51.840
situation. She knew I, but she's like, the fact that she just knew that I already had a ring,

536
00:31:53.040 --> 00:31:56.320
I didn't say it was for her. I didn't say I was going to ask her. I didn't say I was going to

537
00:31:56.320 --> 00:32:01.520
get engaged. I just, the fact she knew I had a ring and it wasn't like just an old ring I had,

538
00:32:01.520 --> 00:32:06.400
I'm just to be clear. It was a ring I had prepared. So I love that you said that Mike,

539
00:32:06.400 --> 00:32:09.520
because that happened with me too. And that just happened to be a thing that kind of like,

540
00:32:09.520 --> 00:32:15.600
she was like, oh, all right. Like, okay, this guy, you know, he's got some things going right

541
00:32:15.600 --> 00:32:22.800
here and thought ahead. So that can be very helpful. Did you purchase that ring as kind

542
00:32:22.800 --> 00:32:31.200
of an activation, like a faith activation exercise? I kind of saw, well, I had just kind of

543
00:32:31.920 --> 00:32:38.480
wanted to be prepared. It just happened to be that I was preparing for that prior to her

544
00:32:39.360 --> 00:32:45.040
sort of, you know, really bringing that forward as a point of our conversation. So yes,

545
00:32:45.040 --> 00:32:50.800
I had prepared it, not necessarily as a fake, that activation. So I was pretty sure that I

546
00:32:50.800 --> 00:32:58.400
was eventually at some point going to ask her to marry me, but I just did it ahead of time.

547
00:32:59.040 --> 00:33:03.200
And it was ended up being a blessing like that. Because sometimes that's not really,

548
00:33:03.440 --> 00:33:09.840
characteristically me. I'm not too far ahead of a guy, but in that instance, it's just kind of

549
00:33:09.840 --> 00:33:15.040
like, I don't know, maybe it was Holy Spirit led or something, but I had had a diamond

550
00:33:15.840 --> 00:33:22.880
that I already had and I had got it set. And so it was a different setting. It wasn't like,

551
00:33:22.880 --> 00:33:30.480
you know, something that was like a, I wasn't trying to like recycle the ring or anything,

552
00:33:30.480 --> 00:33:35.200
you know. So I had to have it set. So there was just a moment I had to go

553
00:33:35.200 --> 00:33:37.600
to the store and like a week turnaround or whatever it was.

554
00:33:40.080 --> 00:33:48.400
But I will tell you that when we had our Austin retreat a couple of years ago, we had about 30

555
00:33:49.120 --> 00:33:54.160
women come. And one of the things we did was a faith activation like that. We went to a bridal

556
00:33:54.160 --> 00:33:58.960
store, which women love to go try on stuff and shop and all that kind of stuff. And we had this

557
00:33:58.960 --> 00:34:04.960
whole event. We set it up with champagne and charcuterie board. It was kind of like a morning

558
00:34:04.960 --> 00:34:11.840
type sort of like event. And we had made a connection with a lady that was serendipitous,

559
00:34:11.840 --> 00:34:16.800
how that connection even made Holy Spirit made. And she was like, Oh my gosh, you know, I have

560
00:34:16.800 --> 00:34:23.920
a bridal shop. We're like, no way. This was a month before the retreat. And Jackie's like,

561
00:34:23.920 --> 00:34:29.679
I would love to bring a group of women and over and do an activation where they could try on

562
00:34:29.679 --> 00:34:33.440
dresses. Like everybody could try on it. Everybody gets to try on a dress type thing, you know,

563
00:34:33.440 --> 00:34:37.280
and have like a morning thing. And if all these women come over and do that, she goes, Oh, that

564
00:34:37.280 --> 00:34:45.520
would be great. And she, you know, so she added her people into it, had them ready to go and had

565
00:34:45.520 --> 00:34:51.600
them ready to fit and do all this kind of stuff. And we had 30 ladies we brought into a bridal

566
00:34:51.600 --> 00:34:55.520
gallery and they could look at the dresses and we took pictures and everybody was so excited

567
00:34:55.520 --> 00:34:59.840
because women love that kind of stuff. And seven ladies.

568
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:05.000
who had no prospect, didn't even have a boyfriend,

569
00:35:05.000 --> 00:35:08.280
didn't have, obviously were not engaged,

570
00:35:08.280 --> 00:35:13.020
seven different women bought dresses that day.

571
00:35:14.300 --> 00:35:17.240
And as like a prophetic act of faith,

572
00:35:17.240 --> 00:35:18.800
they had the wherewithal, they fell in love with it.

573
00:35:18.800 --> 00:35:20.240
They're like, oh my gosh, I love this dress.

574
00:35:20.240 --> 00:35:21.080
This is amazing.

575
00:35:21.080 --> 00:35:22.280
Of course, they had all these ladies around

576
00:35:22.280 --> 00:35:23.680
and tell them, oh, you look beautiful in that,

577
00:35:23.680 --> 00:35:26.100
or no, try this other one on or whatever, right?

578
00:35:26.100 --> 00:35:28.240
They had all the feedback they needed

579
00:35:28.240 --> 00:35:30.020
as if their wedding party was there.

580
00:35:30.020 --> 00:35:33.540
So like this whole bridal party that we're having,

581
00:35:33.540 --> 00:35:36.340
and they literally bought a dress.

582
00:35:36.340 --> 00:35:40.460
And one of them, we actually secretly,

583
00:35:40.460 --> 00:35:43.860
Jackie and I bought it for her as an act of faith.

584
00:35:43.860 --> 00:35:46.020
You know, we were just sewing back into these ladies

585
00:35:46.020 --> 00:35:46.860
and it was just incredible.

586
00:35:46.860 --> 00:35:49.280
It was just this awesome moment.

587
00:35:49.280 --> 00:35:53.360
And then the store, the lady that owned the store,

588
00:35:53.360 --> 00:35:54.540
she started throwing in things.

589
00:35:54.540 --> 00:35:56.460
She goes, oh, well, all of you that bought a dress,

590
00:35:56.460 --> 00:35:58.860
I'm gonna throw in like a veil for each one of you.

591
00:35:58.860 --> 00:36:00.520
And then here's these things,

592
00:36:00.520 --> 00:36:02.060
like these other accoutrements to go with,

593
00:36:02.060 --> 00:36:03.580
you know, dresses and all that.

594
00:36:03.580 --> 00:36:06.020
And they were just so blessed by that.

595
00:36:06.020 --> 00:36:11.020
And I'm telling you what, I think there's at least four

596
00:36:11.220 --> 00:36:16.220
or five of those ladies that bought those seven dresses

597
00:36:16.260 --> 00:36:19.260
that literally got married within the last several years.

598
00:36:19.260 --> 00:36:21.500
That was several years ago when we had that event.

599
00:36:21.500 --> 00:36:24.940
And they literally wore those dresses to their wedding,

600
00:36:24.940 --> 00:36:27.900
probably two, three years later than that event.

601
00:36:29.220 --> 00:36:31.580
And it wasn't just like one or none.

602
00:36:31.580 --> 00:36:34.380
It was like, I think, I know for sure four,

603
00:36:34.380 --> 00:36:37.640
there might've been in five of those seven

604
00:36:37.640 --> 00:36:39.420
that literally wore those dresses.

605
00:36:39.420 --> 00:36:44.420
And a lot of those ladies in that bridal party back then

606
00:36:44.500 --> 00:36:45.460
are now married.

607
00:36:46.740 --> 00:36:49.400
You know, just their level of like,

608
00:36:49.400 --> 00:36:50.900
and there were so many stories,

609
00:36:50.900 --> 00:36:52.020
I could tell you so many stories

610
00:36:52.020 --> 00:36:53.500
about like what they were going through

611
00:36:53.500 --> 00:36:57.700
and what they were experiencing and just like no hope,

612
00:36:57.700 --> 00:37:01.460
no, you know, light on the horizon,

613
00:37:01.460 --> 00:37:04.340
no sense of like any prospects.

614
00:37:04.340 --> 00:37:06.140
And it wasn't just like no prospects,

615
00:37:06.140 --> 00:37:08.900
there were certain things that happened in relationships.

616
00:37:08.900 --> 00:37:10.900
Some of them had been divorced, some of they were,

617
00:37:10.900 --> 00:37:15.580
and there were so many stories that just seemed so unlikely

618
00:37:15.580 --> 00:37:19.260
for them to even be married at any time in the near future.

619
00:37:19.260 --> 00:37:22.620
And here they were buying dresses as an act of faith

620
00:37:22.620 --> 00:37:27.540
to do that, so pretty amazing.

621
00:37:27.540 --> 00:37:29.180
So the fact that you brought that up,

622
00:37:29.180 --> 00:37:31.920
Daniel, as an act of faith, it can be very powerful.

623
00:37:34.260 --> 00:37:39.020
So David and David,

624
00:37:39.020 --> 00:37:41.180
you have more to add to this conversation.

625
00:37:42.300 --> 00:37:43.760
Yeah, I did.

626
00:37:45.380 --> 00:37:47.260
I was just gonna touch on your point

627
00:37:47.260 --> 00:37:48.700
of like buying that ring.

628
00:37:48.700 --> 00:37:52.940
I guess one of the things I've been really struggling with

629
00:37:52.940 --> 00:37:55.860
is just as a man, it's just so like debilitating

630
00:37:55.860 --> 00:37:58.940
meaning if you're like struggling financially.

631
00:37:58.940 --> 00:38:00.620
And the whole reason why I'm in that thing

632
00:38:00.620 --> 00:38:03.700
is because that's last so-called relationship,

633
00:38:03.700 --> 00:38:05.860
you know, that basically was completely due to me.

634
00:38:05.860 --> 00:38:08.660
And I'm basically like starting out all over again.

635
00:38:08.660 --> 00:38:09.500
I feel you.

636
00:38:09.500 --> 00:38:11.420
So it's just like, I mean, do I move forward

637
00:38:11.420 --> 00:38:12.860
or do I put on the brakes?

638
00:38:12.860 --> 00:38:15.020
Do I move forward or put on the brakes?

639
00:38:15.020 --> 00:38:16.180
Yeah.

640
00:38:16.180 --> 00:38:17.020
It's a lot of-

641
00:38:17.100 --> 00:38:19.020
Move forward in relationship, you mean?

642
00:38:19.020 --> 00:38:21.900
Yeah, yeah, because it's just like,

643
00:38:21.900 --> 00:38:22.740
I know you don't-

644
00:38:22.740 --> 00:38:24.780
Well, I mean, I just told you my story.

645
00:38:24.780 --> 00:38:25.620
Yeah.

646
00:38:25.620 --> 00:38:28.020
And my story financially was the same exact thing.

647
00:38:28.020 --> 00:38:31.460
Like my wife and I, we were two income family

648
00:38:31.460 --> 00:38:33.700
and we lived in a $300,000 house,

649
00:38:33.700 --> 00:38:38.500
which at the time in 2003, 2005,

650
00:38:38.500 --> 00:38:42.320
300,000 in Ohio bought a big house.

651
00:38:42.320 --> 00:38:44.620
Now, not so much in certain markets and even,

652
00:38:44.620 --> 00:38:47.940
but I mean, we were living the American dream,

653
00:38:47.940 --> 00:38:50.540
two incomes and we needed the two incomes

654
00:38:50.540 --> 00:38:51.880
in order to make the thing.

655
00:38:51.880 --> 00:38:54.300
So it wasn't like I was like making a bunch of bucks,

656
00:38:54.300 --> 00:38:55.820
but still.

657
00:38:55.820 --> 00:38:57.340
And I'm telling you what,

658
00:38:58.660 --> 00:39:00.260
when she said she wanted to get divorced

659
00:39:00.260 --> 00:39:02.380
and then we were estranged for like a year and a half,

660
00:39:02.380 --> 00:39:05.860
two years almost from that situation,

661
00:39:05.860 --> 00:39:07.480
I'm still living in this house

662
00:39:07.480 --> 00:39:09.100
that she just walked away from.

663
00:39:09.980 --> 00:39:12.860
I don't have her income to now have to share the bills with

664
00:39:12.860 --> 00:39:13.680
and everything.

665
00:39:13.680 --> 00:39:17.440
I'm like divide the income in half, right?

666
00:39:17.440 --> 00:39:19.880
So it was just a matter of time before bankruptcy,

667
00:39:19.880 --> 00:39:21.560
like full on bankruptcy,

668
00:39:23.240 --> 00:39:25.140
house into foreclosure,

669
00:39:25.140 --> 00:39:26.440
live there as long as I can.

670
00:39:26.440 --> 00:39:28.280
Literally, I'm not kidding.

671
00:39:28.280 --> 00:39:31.440
We both worked at a ministry at the same time.

672
00:39:31.440 --> 00:39:33.120
During that time, we were still employed

673
00:39:33.120 --> 00:39:37.600
by a very, very large church ministry, television ministry.

674
00:39:37.600 --> 00:39:42.280
And we were at work at the church in staff meetings

675
00:39:42.280 --> 00:39:46.320
while our cars were literally being repossessed

676
00:39:46.320 --> 00:39:49.900
in the same day, both of our vehicles.

677
00:39:51.080 --> 00:39:53.440
So trust me when I say,

678
00:39:53.440 --> 00:39:56.440
I know what it's like to like not be prepared

679
00:39:56.440 --> 00:39:58.280
for the next relationship financially

680
00:39:58.280 --> 00:40:00.080
because I had not even.

681
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:04.800
I've been close to coming out of that by the time that I had

682
00:40:05.000 --> 00:40:11.240
that whole relationship ended, estranged, meet my neighbor.

683
00:40:11.440 --> 00:40:13.320
And then eight months later, marry her.

684
00:40:13.520 --> 00:40:17.000
Well, so trust me, give the grace for things.

685
00:40:17.200 --> 00:40:20.360
Yeah. But at the same time, like if you don't

686
00:40:20.560 --> 00:40:24.720
like if you have the ability, set yourself up to win.

687
00:40:24.920 --> 00:40:25.440
Right.

688
00:40:25.640 --> 00:40:29.200
Like, you know, I mean, like so I would you know, if the Lord's anointed it

689
00:40:29.360 --> 00:40:34.720
and appointed it like my my first marriage, I had like.

690
00:40:35.320 --> 00:40:38.760
Fifteen hundred bucks for a ring, right, it didn't have real diamonds,

691
00:40:38.760 --> 00:40:42.000
let's put it that way, but I had it custom made and she loved it.

692
00:40:42.200 --> 00:40:46.320
Right. And so like and we talked about like an anniversary,

693
00:40:46.520 --> 00:40:48.880
I was going to do it for the I thought about doing it for the 20th,

694
00:40:49.080 --> 00:40:51.280
giving her actually a real ring. Right.

695
00:40:51.480 --> 00:40:55.520
But so I just I wanted to I didn't want to if you're not in a place to do it,

696
00:40:55.520 --> 00:40:58.760
then, you know, the Lord's grace can be is within it.

697
00:40:58.960 --> 00:41:03.160
But if you are set yourself up to win and that's that's kind of my point.

698
00:41:03.360 --> 00:41:06.000
Yeah. Sorry. I didn't want to bring any condemnation.

699
00:41:06.200 --> 00:41:07.200
And that's good.

700
00:41:07.200 --> 00:41:08.160
I appreciate that.

701
00:41:08.160 --> 00:41:09.920
Mike and saying that. No, it's true.

702
00:41:10.120 --> 00:41:11.400
But like, do what you can do.

703
00:41:11.600 --> 00:41:14.320
And the other thing is this like

704
00:41:14.520 --> 00:41:18.920
there was a ring I gave to Jackie a couple of years ago that

705
00:41:19.120 --> 00:41:21.560
there's a whole nother story about the ring I originally gave her.

706
00:41:21.760 --> 00:41:24.160
But I'll say that for another time.

707
00:41:24.360 --> 00:41:28.920
And there was a time where she didn't have a wedding ring again.

708
00:41:29.120 --> 00:41:31.800
And I actually bought a Morganite stone.

709
00:41:32.000 --> 00:41:35.200
So I just kind of went like a beautiful stone, but cheaper route.

710
00:41:35.400 --> 00:41:37.200
So like it wasn't necessarily a diamond.

711
00:41:37.400 --> 00:41:39.960
And there's some women that like that doesn't bother them at all.

712
00:41:39.960 --> 00:41:41.840
There's some women like, no, it's got to be a diamond.

713
00:41:41.840 --> 00:41:44.200
It's got to fit just inside my nostril or whatever.

714
00:41:44.400 --> 00:41:47.320
Like, I'm like, OK, if that's your girl,

715
00:41:47.320 --> 00:41:50.200
whatever, and you got it wherewithal to do it, fine, whatever.

716
00:41:50.400 --> 00:41:52.360
But I mean, like a lot of women are just

717
00:41:52.360 --> 00:41:55.880
like they're very sentimental about, you know, they can they can there's

718
00:41:56.080 --> 00:42:00.280
different ideas like my daughters, both of my daughters who are in their 20s.

719
00:42:00.480 --> 00:42:01.520
They're both married.

720
00:42:01.720 --> 00:42:06.280
They don't have diamonds as their, you know, engagement stone.

721
00:42:06.480 --> 00:42:09.480
You know, they wanted they're like they're more conscientious.

722
00:42:09.480 --> 00:42:10.800
There's Gen Zers, whatever.

723
00:42:11.000 --> 00:42:13.600
They have different ideas about how the world goes.

724
00:42:13.800 --> 00:42:15.480
And they're like, no diamonds. That's terrible.

725
00:42:15.480 --> 00:42:16.680
Blood diamonds. That's horrible.

726
00:42:16.880 --> 00:42:18.040
Like, oh, that can't do that.

727
00:42:18.240 --> 00:42:21.320
And we got to go do like, you know,

728
00:42:21.480 --> 00:42:23.200
what is it called?

729
00:42:23.400 --> 00:42:28.400
Factory made Zirconia, the lab, the lab grown ones,

730
00:42:28.400 --> 00:42:30.720
yeah, lab grown diamonds, of course, those are cheaper.

731
00:42:30.920 --> 00:42:33.960
Morganite stones, you know, so, you know,

732
00:42:34.160 --> 00:42:37.080
there's a lot of ways to skin a cat, I guess what I'm trying to say.

733
00:42:37.280 --> 00:42:40.880
So in other words, my story tells you that you don't have

734
00:42:41.080 --> 00:42:44.520
to have it all together in order to have a successful relationship.

735
00:42:44.720 --> 00:42:47.200
But at the same time, to Mike's point,

736
00:42:47.400 --> 00:42:50.760
you're you're doing what you can do, right?

737
00:42:50.960 --> 00:42:55.080
You're trying to like, hey, let's there's a thousand ways

738
00:42:55.280 --> 00:42:59.120
to get out of a hole financially, there's so much information on the Internet.

739
00:42:59.320 --> 00:43:00.800
It's so overwhelming.

740
00:43:01.000 --> 00:43:04.560
There's so much ways like make money these days, do that kind of stuff.

741
00:43:04.760 --> 00:43:06.080
There's a hustle out there.

742
00:43:06.280 --> 00:43:10.720
There's a lot of smart ideas and a lot of people doing a lot of smart things.

743
00:43:10.920 --> 00:43:12.720
Just, you know, get educated about it,

744
00:43:12.920 --> 00:43:19.640
do your best and employ some old fashioned like saving financial tactics.

745
00:43:19.840 --> 00:43:23.160
And eventually, you know, with that, you'll come out of it.

746
00:43:23.360 --> 00:43:26.680
You'll be surprised at where you can be in a couple of years,

747
00:43:26.880 --> 00:43:29.440
just be like, OK, Lord, I'm in this situation,

748
00:43:29.640 --> 00:43:32.040
but I got to change my life and I need some help.

749
00:43:32.240 --> 00:43:35.960
And just have somebody just believe that God is going to bring somebody to you

750
00:43:36.160 --> 00:43:39.200
that say, hey, let me help you start a business, let me help you with your

751
00:43:39.400 --> 00:43:43.680
finances, let me show you how you can build wealth, whatever it is.

752
00:43:43.880 --> 00:43:46.960
We don't talk a lot about that on this on this group, but, you know,

753
00:43:46.960 --> 00:43:51.640
I'm a part I'm connected to a lot of things that are, you know,

754
00:43:51.840 --> 00:43:53.520
wealth building.

755
00:43:53.720 --> 00:43:56.120
Financial type of stuff that.

756
00:43:56.320 --> 00:43:58.320
Can be done, so.

757
00:43:58.680 --> 00:44:03.200
I just say that for encouragement that there are definitely answers out there.

758
00:44:03.400 --> 00:44:05.960
Yeah, I mean, it's

759
00:44:06.160 --> 00:44:10.040
kind of thing there on the point of do I have to declare bankruptcy?

760
00:44:10.240 --> 00:44:13.280
I think God's saying, oh, just trust me, you know,

761
00:44:13.920 --> 00:44:17.280
what I can, what I can absolutely what I have now, you know?

762
00:44:17.480 --> 00:44:19.120
Absolutely.

763
00:44:22.120 --> 00:44:24.800
There was a comment earlier,

764
00:44:25.000 --> 00:44:30.400
Zach and Chris, you mentioned Zach, something to sharing and you thumbs it up,

765
00:44:30.600 --> 00:44:33.000
Zach, is that something you're wanting to share?

766
00:44:33.200 --> 00:44:36.160
I don't know what even what it was that you post in the app, but.

767
00:44:36.360 --> 00:44:39.920
Yeah, I mean, really just more, I guess, like a follow up from last week.

768
00:44:40.120 --> 00:44:41.120
That's right.

769
00:44:41.360 --> 00:44:43.600
Because I know I had mentioned

770
00:44:43.800 --> 00:44:48.760
this really kind of feeling a lot of frustration and disappointment from

771
00:44:48.960 --> 00:44:54.960
some things that happened in the weekend and yeah, between that night and I think

772
00:44:55.160 --> 00:45:00.040
it was it was Wednesday or Thursday that I had had.

773
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.000
had, um, you know, just some really powerful times of prayer with God.

774
00:45:05.060 --> 00:45:10.700
Um, and I don't, I don't remember if Jackie talks about like inner healing

775
00:45:10.700 --> 00:45:18.220
stuff in the heart work, um, but inner healing something that I've, uh, Been

776
00:45:18.440 --> 00:45:23.300
made aware of and like done through like other freedom materials and things like

777
00:45:23.300 --> 00:45:29.500
that, um, where basically like, yeah, you ask God, like, what is the root of, you

778
00:45:29.500 --> 00:45:31.420
know, this lie or whatever it is.

779
00:45:31.420 --> 00:45:33.740
And generally a memory will come back to mind.

780
00:45:33.740 --> 00:45:36.820
And like you ask God, like, okay, where were you in this memory?

781
00:45:37.440 --> 00:45:38.360
Um, that sort of thing.

782
00:45:39.280 --> 00:45:47.140
And, um, so I think I even kind of posted it a little bit, uh, on, um,

783
00:45:47.500 --> 00:45:52.740
the most recent, like the check-in post as well, but basically like there were

784
00:45:52.740 --> 00:45:57.720
two lies that really kind of came out through those moments, um, and, you

785
00:45:57.720 --> 00:46:01.800
know, succinctly put, it was basically that like, God is a liar.

786
00:46:01.800 --> 00:46:05.200
He can't be trusted and that God's not as good as he says he is.

787
00:46:05.800 --> 00:46:09.480
Um, and obviously those are easily refuted with scripture, but you know,

788
00:46:09.480 --> 00:46:15.060
that's the thing about lies is they're easy, easy to, they're, we

789
00:46:15.060 --> 00:46:16.600
can be easily deceived by them.

790
00:46:17.460 --> 00:46:18.140
Yeah, absolutely.

791
00:46:18.160 --> 00:46:18.440
Absolutely.

792
00:46:18.440 --> 00:46:23.820
Um, and so, uh, really like the second one, I think for me was really

793
00:46:23.820 --> 00:46:28.460
powerful because it actually took me back to, um, a childhood memory where,

794
00:46:28.620 --> 00:46:35.780
you know, I had this toy and it had a squeaker in it and I was, you know,

795
00:46:35.880 --> 00:46:38.220
jumping on it cause I wanted the loudest squeak possible.

796
00:46:38.220 --> 00:46:41.380
And my mom was like, Hey, if you jump on it, you're going to break it.

797
00:46:41.780 --> 00:46:47.060
And, you know, I just completely disregarded her, kept jumping on it.

798
00:46:47.060 --> 00:46:47.660
And guess what?

799
00:46:47.660 --> 00:46:49.300
It broke and guess what?

800
00:46:49.380 --> 00:46:53.060
I was sad that it broke, but that's the result of my own actions.

801
00:46:53.660 --> 00:47:01.580
Um, and really that, uh, what kind of God showed me through that memory

802
00:47:01.580 --> 00:47:08.740
specifically was that, you know, as a kid, as a child, like we, we don't

803
00:47:08.740 --> 00:47:13.620
always know what is better, but as we grow up, like we have, the one of

804
00:47:13.620 --> 00:47:17.740
the things we have to learn is we have to learn that God trusts early.

805
00:47:18.460 --> 00:47:22.220
We have to trust that God has our good intentions at heart.

806
00:47:22.820 --> 00:47:23.100
Yeah.

807
00:47:23.220 --> 00:47:24.740
You know, in everything that he says.

808
00:47:25.540 --> 00:47:30.740
Um, and there was a moment where the Holy spirit even kind of tied it to

809
00:47:30.740 --> 00:47:36.460
something, uh, a training that I had done back in October and it was, uh, one

810
00:47:36.460 --> 00:47:38.580
of the sections on that was on identity.

811
00:47:39.340 --> 00:47:44.220
And I don't know if you guys have heard this, uh, framing of identity, but a lot

812
00:47:44.220 --> 00:47:49.500
of the ways that we look at identity, um, we look at it from the perspective

813
00:47:49.500 --> 00:47:55.460
of what do we want to be and what do we need to have and do in order to achieve

814
00:47:55.460 --> 00:48:00.540
that so like we've, we spend most of our time and energy on what are we doing so

815
00:48:00.540 --> 00:48:05.060
that we can have the things so that we can be whatever it is that we want.

816
00:48:05.500 --> 00:48:11.540
Um, but in the kingdom, the way it works is our being is actually defined by God.

817
00:48:11.940 --> 00:48:17.100
And out of that being, we overflow into our doing so that we can have

818
00:48:17.100 --> 00:48:19.620
the life that God desires for us.

819
00:48:20.300 --> 00:48:24.940
And so it was just a great moment for the Holy spirit to call, call,

820
00:48:25.020 --> 00:48:27.860
pop that, sorry, call back to mind.

821
00:48:27.860 --> 00:48:31.300
Some things that I had learned a couple of months ago and just, you know,

822
00:48:31.300 --> 00:48:36.860
get back into alignment, like, okay, God, you know, my, who I am is unchangeable.

823
00:48:36.900 --> 00:48:37.820
You define it.

824
00:48:38.380 --> 00:48:43.300
And you know, I don't need to, my life is not shifted or

825
00:48:43.300 --> 00:48:45.220
changed by these outside things.

826
00:48:45.260 --> 00:48:47.500
It is defined by you.

827
00:48:47.900 --> 00:48:49.980
And out of that is the overflow of my life.

828
00:48:52.380 --> 00:48:53.060
That's so good.

829
00:48:53.060 --> 00:48:54.300
And yeah, no, exactly.

830
00:48:54.300 --> 00:48:56.460
The heartwork just to be clear.

831
00:48:57.060 --> 00:49:03.100
Um, so inner healing is a, is a broad, you know, like, uh, current topic

832
00:49:03.100 --> 00:49:04.860
and Christian community right now.

833
00:49:04.860 --> 00:49:07.100
And, um, it has been for the last couple of decades.

834
00:49:07.140 --> 00:49:11.780
And, um, but what we feel like is heartwork is a certain protocol

835
00:49:11.780 --> 00:49:13.260
within the space of inner healing.

836
00:49:13.580 --> 00:49:14.180
Make sense.

837
00:49:14.860 --> 00:49:16.180
That's kind of how we look at it.

838
00:49:16.260 --> 00:49:22.340
Um, the way we, um, you know, the way the heartwork came about was, you know,

839
00:49:22.340 --> 00:49:27.620
Jackie did, um, 20 plus years of traditional son of vocational ministry,

840
00:49:28.020 --> 00:49:31.900
mostly with women, and then also went through her own healing, inner healing

841
00:49:31.900 --> 00:49:37.540
process, and this was a, just as sort of a unique perspective, um, a protocol

842
00:49:37.740 --> 00:49:41.380
that God gave her to say, Hey, this is how you process your heartwork.

843
00:49:41.780 --> 00:49:46.100
So what we feel like heartwork is it's a protocol and it's a tool

844
00:49:46.500 --> 00:49:48.940
to a way to process inner healing.

845
00:49:49.060 --> 00:49:51.180
There's several other different protocols out there.

846
00:49:51.660 --> 00:49:54.900
Um, but we definitely deal with, you know, the first section of

847
00:49:54.900 --> 00:49:56.060
courses, what is the heart?

848
00:49:56.660 --> 00:49:59.860
And, um, we talk about what is the difference between.

849
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:07.000
you know, the inside of you and the part of you that has all of this area that needs to be healed.

850
00:50:07.000 --> 00:50:13.200
So we talk about what is the heart. The second area or the second section in that book is we're talking about lies.

851
00:50:13.600 --> 00:50:18.440
So we definitely bring up the whole lies thing. And thirdly, with regard to identity,

852
00:50:19.420 --> 00:50:23.760
what we teach in heart work is that

853
00:50:24.760 --> 00:50:33.040
there definitely is an identity that is your most ideal identity, your most authentic, genuine identity,

854
00:50:33.040 --> 00:50:38.600
which is the identity that God has given you in terms of especially as a child of God, son or daughter of God.

855
00:50:38.800 --> 00:50:44.280
But then more specifically, the things that he fashioned within you and your soul, your makeup.

856
00:50:44.440 --> 00:50:52.760
We believe that you're made up of three parts, three parts that are reflective of the identity of God and made in his image.

857
00:50:53.080 --> 00:50:59.520
We talk about the body, soul and spirit. We talk about how the body is the physical temple, the flesh that you live in,

858
00:51:00.000 --> 00:51:04.680
that you are a spirit. The essence of who you really are is a spirit.

859
00:51:05.240 --> 00:51:12.440
You live in a body and you possess a soul and your soul is made up of your mind, will and your emotions.

860
00:51:12.960 --> 00:51:17.480
So these are the repository, your mind and your emotions.

861
00:51:17.480 --> 00:51:25.360
Your mind especially is the repository of all the experiences that you have witnessed and felt and gone through through your whole life.

862
00:51:26.600 --> 00:51:37.600
Your soul is the unique part of you that makes up how you're called and what your characteristics are and the different things that God's created and fashioned within you.

863
00:51:38.160 --> 00:51:43.560
And that's the part of it that is divided in a sense, that has sort of like two sides, as Paul said,

864
00:51:43.880 --> 00:51:49.960
that you are constantly going back and forth between the spirit and the flesh, you know, the spirit and the flesh.

865
00:51:49.960 --> 00:51:52.560
And so in that sense, the flesh isn't the physical flesh.

866
00:51:52.960 --> 00:51:59.760
It's your unredeemed, sort of like fallen state that is in the process of being redeemed,

867
00:52:00.600 --> 00:52:05.800
starting with the moment that you realize you have a need for a savior, you accept that process.

868
00:52:06.360 --> 00:52:09.360
I just explained a whole lot in that whole thing.

869
00:52:09.640 --> 00:52:10.920
That's kind of the theology.

870
00:52:11.280 --> 00:52:17.280
And so identity goes with that because identity, I love how you brought that up.

871
00:52:17.280 --> 00:52:21.520
It's like identity, if it's in the sense of like, what do you want to be?

872
00:52:21.680 --> 00:52:23.120
I want to be like that.

873
00:52:23.120 --> 00:52:24.400
I want to be this way.

874
00:52:24.880 --> 00:52:33.840
You could have a picture of an identity that is not congruent with who God's made you to be.

875
00:52:33.840 --> 00:52:39.640
So if you aspire to be something that you're really not, that doesn't really help you to get your identity.

876
00:52:40.080 --> 00:52:44.520
What helps you to get your identity is to realize that God's created within you a uniqueness.

877
00:52:44.720 --> 00:52:49.720
And you stepping into the fullness of that is the best version of yourself.

878
00:52:50.360 --> 00:52:52.240
So that's kind of how we explain it.

879
00:52:52.600 --> 00:52:59.640
And I love that you're getting that revelation in that because that's what it all comes down to.

880
00:53:00.200 --> 00:53:04.560
Yeah, no, like even just kind of on like a practical level, you know, to put some legs under it.

881
00:53:05.000 --> 00:53:22.640
You know, it's like if if the life that we desire, like who we want to be is somebody that is loved or accepted, you know, if that is like our end goal and we don't understand that that is the foundation, you know, we're going to do whatever to get whatever.

882
00:53:22.640 --> 00:53:25.040
Like, you know, we're going to sell our soul.

883
00:53:25.040 --> 00:53:38.240
We're going to like, you know, shirk on our character, all those other things to get the fame, to get the money, to get the wealth, whatever it is that we think is going to lead to a life of being loved and accepted.

884
00:53:38.240 --> 00:53:52.960
Whereas when we begin by being loved and accepted by God, it is that overflows into, OK, now we can share that love, share that acceptance with the world around us and have that community and things that we desire in the first place.

885
00:53:53.240 --> 00:54:08.600
Yeah, absolutely. And that's and that's the reason why actually in the first section of HeartWorth, that's why we start with surrender, because there has to become a point of surrender that says, OK, God, I know what you have is the best for me.

886
00:54:09.200 --> 00:54:14.360
And and some people are still struggling with that concept because they're like, oh, I don't know.

887
00:54:14.360 --> 00:54:16.320
I don't know if I trust God, you know, type thing.

888
00:54:16.640 --> 00:54:25.120
So but there's there's this point where you don't have to be completely like trusting enough to to surrender.

889
00:54:25.120 --> 00:54:28.280
You can surrender without a certain level of trust.

890
00:54:28.280 --> 00:54:29.880
And I don't mean that's ideal.

891
00:54:29.880 --> 00:54:35.840
I just mean saying that you can come to a point where like, I'm not really sure, but I want to surrender to this process.

892
00:54:36.000 --> 00:54:39.320
I want I want to be willing to be made willing.

893
00:54:39.320 --> 00:54:43.320
Does that make sense? It's like when you're excited about it, like, hey, I'm willing to do this.

894
00:54:43.320 --> 00:54:46.000
I'm all ready to go, you know, like and some people are like,

895
00:54:46.440 --> 00:54:51.360
I don't know, I've really have some trauma, some pain, some hurt centered around this whole like development thing.

896
00:54:51.680 --> 00:54:55.680
So I'm willing, but I'm sort of willing to be made willing type thing.

897
00:54:55.680 --> 00:54:57.480
So some people got to start there.

898
00:54:57.480 --> 00:55:00.040
And that's where surrender process is so important, because.

899
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:04.400
it gives you the right sort of like,

900
00:55:06.040 --> 00:55:07.460
what do you call it?

901
00:55:07.460 --> 00:55:10.760
The coordinates to try to start out on your trajectory.

902
00:55:10.760 --> 00:55:11.600
Huh?

903
00:55:11.600 --> 00:55:12.600
Trajectory.

904
00:55:12.600 --> 00:55:14.720
Trajectory, coordinates, yeah, exactly.

905
00:55:14.720 --> 00:55:16.260
So that you're not like,

906
00:55:16.260 --> 00:55:20.840
it's one thing to like step off a couple degrees.

907
00:55:20.840 --> 00:55:22.840
It's when you get further out there,

908
00:55:22.840 --> 00:55:24.960
you're gonna be further off from your point, right?

909
00:55:24.960 --> 00:55:27.720
So like the surrender part of it is very important

910
00:55:27.720 --> 00:55:31.720
because then it gives you the ability and the promise

911
00:55:31.720 --> 00:55:33.400
to be able to work with Holy Spirit

912
00:55:33.400 --> 00:55:36.740
to bring you into your most authentic identity.

913
00:55:38.320 --> 00:55:40.120
So love that.

914
00:55:40.120 --> 00:55:41.540
Thank you for sharing that.

915
00:55:41.540 --> 00:55:42.900
Thank you for bringing that up.

916
00:55:42.900 --> 00:55:45.280
And I love that you're like having these revelations

917
00:55:45.280 --> 00:55:48.780
because super powerful.

918
00:55:50.160 --> 00:55:51.880
Yeah, no, it's just at the end of the day,

919
00:55:51.880 --> 00:55:55.720
like it's things that I think we all kind of know,

920
00:55:55.720 --> 00:55:58.240
if we're in our word and spending time with God,

921
00:55:58.240 --> 00:56:00.280
but it's just, it's those moments of realignment,

922
00:56:00.280 --> 00:56:02.960
the Holy Spirit's like, hey, you got in that track,

923
00:56:02.960 --> 00:56:04.360
let's get back.

924
00:56:04.360 --> 00:56:07.360
Yeah, and the reason too, same point,

925
00:56:07.360 --> 00:56:08.520
like good point on that,

926
00:56:08.520 --> 00:56:11.400
because the reason we feel like HeartWorks is a protocol

927
00:56:11.400 --> 00:56:13.800
is because it's a tool that can be used over and over again.

928
00:56:13.800 --> 00:56:16.840
When you go through the initial HeartWork process,

929
00:56:16.840 --> 00:56:19.520
it takes some time to really unpack some things.

930
00:56:19.520 --> 00:56:21.280
But once you get good at being like,

931
00:56:21.280 --> 00:56:25.280
okay, I'm coming back to myself, I feel some pain.

932
00:56:25.800 --> 00:56:27.800
Pain is an indicator that something needs to be

933
00:56:27.800 --> 00:56:29.920
like attended to.

934
00:56:29.920 --> 00:56:32.040
So you're like, okay, where's this pain?

935
00:56:32.040 --> 00:56:33.480
It's connected to a memory.

936
00:56:33.480 --> 00:56:34.760
There must be something there.

937
00:56:34.760 --> 00:56:37.840
Lord, I surrender to this process.

938
00:56:37.840 --> 00:56:39.680
I wanna do my HeartWork in this way.

939
00:56:39.680 --> 00:56:43.320
Holy Spirit, show me what's going on in this moment.

940
00:56:43.320 --> 00:56:45.500
And then once you have that revelation,

941
00:56:46.540 --> 00:56:49.480
you can forgive, you can repent,

942
00:56:49.480 --> 00:56:52.760
you can just release it and then be healed in it.

943
00:56:52.760 --> 00:56:54.760
And that process can take five minutes.

944
00:56:55.720 --> 00:56:57.680
Once you have this protocol down to like,

945
00:56:57.680 --> 00:56:59.200
okay, this is what I do.

946
00:56:59.200 --> 00:57:02.520
Doesn't have to be like a season of like several days

947
00:57:02.520 --> 00:57:03.920
or a week of going through a process.

948
00:57:03.920 --> 00:57:04.760
It can be just like, okay,

949
00:57:04.760 --> 00:57:06.440
I'm gonna really do some HeartWork around this.

950
00:57:06.440 --> 00:57:08.040
And my wife reminds me of this all the time.

951
00:57:08.040 --> 00:57:09.920
She goes, I use some HeartWork to do around that.

952
00:57:09.920 --> 00:57:11.120
And I'm like, all right.

953
00:57:12.760 --> 00:57:15.120
I gotta go in my prayer closet for about 10 minutes

954
00:57:15.120 --> 00:57:18.760
and change my state, deal with this moment of HeartWork

955
00:57:18.760 --> 00:57:21.120
because there's some pain around this.

956
00:57:21.120 --> 00:57:23.080
So thank you for bringing that up.

957
00:57:23.080 --> 00:57:23.920
I love that.

958
00:57:26.280 --> 00:57:28.920
David, I had a quick question.

959
00:57:28.920 --> 00:57:30.200
Yes, sir.

960
00:57:30.200 --> 00:57:31.040
Well, two actually.

961
00:57:31.040 --> 00:57:36.040
One was for when Jackie, yeah.

962
00:57:36.320 --> 00:57:39.280
When Jackie talks about people that are on the team,

963
00:57:40.220 --> 00:57:43.640
like on whatever event, like for example,

964
00:57:43.640 --> 00:57:48.480
Supernatural Saturday or Sunday Night Prayer,

965
00:57:50.480 --> 00:57:52.960
do any of those ladies have access

966
00:57:53.000 --> 00:57:58.000
to these video calls with us that are within the,

967
00:58:01.360 --> 00:58:02.680
don't know a better way to say this,

968
00:58:02.680 --> 00:58:07.680
the last year single pool of possible dates?

969
00:58:09.560 --> 00:58:12.840
Not really, because our team,

970
00:58:12.840 --> 00:58:15.640
I mean, anybody that would have access

971
00:58:15.640 --> 00:58:19.000
to like these recordings would be only our staff people,

972
00:58:19.000 --> 00:58:20.120
the people that are paid.

973
00:58:20.120 --> 00:58:21.760
I mean, that's-

974
00:58:21.760 --> 00:58:22.880
Okay, and those people are not-

975
00:58:22.880 --> 00:58:23.720
Five people.

976
00:58:25.600 --> 00:58:27.960
It was just something that was an anxious-

977
00:58:27.960 --> 00:58:29.680
They're all married except for one.

978
00:58:29.680 --> 00:58:32.120
Okay, it was just an anxious thought that kicked on.

979
00:58:32.120 --> 00:58:33.680
When we say the team too,

980
00:58:33.680 --> 00:58:37.720
we do have a host of moderators and some volunteers

981
00:58:37.720 --> 00:58:39.400
and some people that lead prayer times.

982
00:58:39.400 --> 00:58:41.160
And those are people that have just,

983
00:58:41.160 --> 00:58:42.200
they're part of the community,

984
00:58:42.200 --> 00:58:46.360
but they wouldn't have access to any of these recordings.

985
00:58:46.360 --> 00:58:47.400
It was just an anxious thought.

986
00:58:47.400 --> 00:58:52.120
She told me a recent thing about getting spotlighted

987
00:58:52.120 --> 00:58:54.600
and said, oh, hey, so-and-so was asking about you.

988
00:58:54.600 --> 00:58:55.560
And I was like, oh, that's awesome.

989
00:58:55.560 --> 00:58:59.400
And then part of that anxious attachment,

990
00:59:01.120 --> 00:59:03.360
I haven't shared anything too personal on this call yet,

991
00:59:03.360 --> 00:59:04.440
but I was planning to,

992
00:59:04.440 --> 00:59:07.800
because ultimately, you know,

993
00:59:09.320 --> 00:59:11.120
like once I got a further understanding

994
00:59:11.120 --> 00:59:13.160
of level four and five, it's like, yeah,

995
00:59:13.160 --> 00:59:15.320
you gotta know where all the bodies are buried.

996
00:59:15.320 --> 00:59:17.760
Haven't killed anyone, but still, you know,

997
00:59:17.760 --> 00:59:20.520
it's stuff that I plan to share in the future

998
00:59:21.720 --> 00:59:23.120
with you guys before.

999
00:59:24.200 --> 00:59:26.800
Like that was also part of the VA process

1000
00:59:26.800 --> 00:59:28.240
was going through some of the trauma

1001
00:59:28.240 --> 00:59:29.240
I went through overseas.

1002
00:59:29.240 --> 00:59:34.240
And it was, yeah, it affected me for like weeks after,

1003
00:59:34.600 --> 00:59:38.640
like still feeling the anxiety from it all.

1004
00:59:38.640 --> 00:59:40.480
And then the other question was,

1005
00:59:40.480 --> 00:59:41.920
has anyone heard from Abram?

1006
00:59:42.240 --> 00:59:43.080
No.

1007
00:59:43.080 --> 00:59:45.720
And I was thinking about him earlier in this call, actually,

1008
00:59:45.720 --> 00:59:48.720
if I'm gonna reach out to him and see what's up with him.

1009
00:59:48.720 --> 00:59:51.640
So I will do that.

1010
00:59:51.640 --> 00:59:52.480
Awesome.

1011
00:59:54.360 --> 00:59:55.200
That was it.

1012
00:59:55.200 --> 00:59:56.360
That was it for me.

1013
00:59:56.360 --> 00:59:58.000
Other than Monty Python joke.

1014
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:01.280
in the chat.

1015
01:00:01.280 --> 01:00:02.160
Nice.

1016
01:00:02.160 --> 01:00:04.200
I'm coming up to that right now here.

1017
01:00:04.200 --> 01:00:06.880
I'm seeing this, like, you guys are having

1018
01:00:06.880 --> 01:00:08.440
your own conversation over here.

1019
01:00:10.840 --> 01:00:11.680
Daniel, do you have anything?

1020
01:00:11.680 --> 01:00:13.560
Is your hands raised or is it just from?

1021
01:00:13.560 --> 01:00:15.320
Yeah, I've got it up.

1022
01:00:15.320 --> 01:00:16.160
Go ahead.

1023
01:00:16.160 --> 01:00:16.980
Yeah, and you know what?

1024
01:00:16.980 --> 01:00:18.800
I think I will piggyback, like, I do,

1025
01:00:18.800 --> 01:00:21.120
and maybe I'm the only one, but I think,

1026
01:00:21.120 --> 01:00:22.480
oh, sorry, let me put that down.

1027
01:00:22.480 --> 01:00:27.480
I think, I do sense kind of a hesitancy to share too much,

1028
01:00:28.480 --> 01:00:31.760
not knowing, like, where, knowing that this session

1029
01:00:31.760 --> 01:00:34.420
is recorded and kind of posted online for posterity.

1030
01:00:35.840 --> 01:00:38.960
Well, it's not posted online for posterity, actually.

1031
01:00:38.960 --> 01:00:42.560
It's not even, well, I mean, everything's online, I guess,

1032
01:00:42.560 --> 01:00:44.120
but it's on our app.

1033
01:00:44.120 --> 01:00:47.080
It's been, regardless of being recorded, you know.

1034
01:00:47.080 --> 01:00:49.520
Just so you know, it's not posted on Facebook.

1035
01:00:49.520 --> 01:00:51.000
Well, but it's on the, it's on the men's,

1036
01:00:51.000 --> 01:00:53.080
it's on the men's thing.

1037
01:00:53.080 --> 01:00:54.320
It's on our chat.

1038
01:00:54.320 --> 01:00:55.160
Yeah.

1039
01:00:55.360 --> 01:00:57.680
It's in our app, excuse me.

1040
01:00:57.680 --> 01:01:02.680
And our app is kind of in a closed loop sort of situation

1041
01:01:03.400 --> 01:01:05.080
as far as the servers.

1042
01:01:05.080 --> 01:01:07.280
Yeah, yeah.

1043
01:01:07.280 --> 01:01:09.320
It was definitely, yeah.

1044
01:01:09.320 --> 01:01:10.400
Oh, sorry.

1045
01:01:10.400 --> 01:01:11.760
Oh, no, go ahead, Dave.

1046
01:01:11.760 --> 01:01:14.320
I was just saying, it was actually why I didn't even

1047
01:01:14.320 --> 01:01:16.920
interact with the app for the longest time

1048
01:01:16.920 --> 01:01:19.360
because I thought other ladies were on the app

1049
01:01:19.360 --> 01:01:21.620
that would see me writing anything on my updates.

1050
01:01:21.620 --> 01:01:23.400
I'm like, mm-mm, nope.

1051
01:01:23.400 --> 01:01:24.240
Yeah.

1052
01:01:24.240 --> 01:01:26.840
Well, the other thing too is that group,

1053
01:01:26.840 --> 01:01:29.720
just so you know too, that group is,

1054
01:01:31.240 --> 01:01:32.680
you can't just join a group.

1055
01:01:32.680 --> 01:01:35.360
You actually have to, we have to let you into a group

1056
01:01:35.360 --> 01:01:36.920
or there's an automation.

1057
01:01:36.920 --> 01:01:38.680
Yeah, I know they're silent, right?

1058
01:01:39.800 --> 01:01:42.120
Yeah, they're definitely, yeah, for sure.

1059
01:01:42.120 --> 01:01:44.160
And you can't just like go around the app.

1060
01:01:44.160 --> 01:01:47.000
So like, if you look at my app, I have all these groups

1061
01:01:47.000 --> 01:01:49.840
because I have every group that's imaginable.

1062
01:01:49.840 --> 01:01:52.240
And there's a handful of people,

1063
01:01:52.240 --> 01:01:54.560
probably three or four people that have that

1064
01:01:54.560 --> 01:01:58.400
sort of same level, but the community at large,

1065
01:01:58.400 --> 01:02:02.040
they would only have the group that's pertaining to them.

1066
01:02:02.040 --> 01:02:02.860
So, you know.

1067
01:02:03.960 --> 01:02:04.800
Yeah.

1068
01:02:06.440 --> 01:02:07.320
What was I gonna bring up?

1069
01:02:07.320 --> 01:02:10.800
Oh, I think maybe, and maybe I know we're kind of,

1070
01:02:10.800 --> 01:02:12.720
maybe this is too big of a can of worms

1071
01:02:12.720 --> 01:02:16.700
to open up this late in the call, but I think,

1072
01:02:17.760 --> 01:02:19.920
and maybe I'm the only one, but one of the things

1073
01:02:19.920 --> 01:02:24.840
I tried really hard to do was learn from my failed marriage

1074
01:02:24.840 --> 01:02:29.840
and essentially not just jump back into selecting,

1075
01:02:30.920 --> 01:02:34.920
showing up the same and selecting the same.

1076
01:02:34.920 --> 01:02:35.760
Right.

1077
01:02:35.760 --> 01:02:37.480
And, you know, I think a lot of things exist

1078
01:02:37.480 --> 01:02:38.800
kind of on a continuum.

1079
01:02:38.800 --> 01:02:41.000
And so I'm trying to find that like sweet spot

1080
01:02:41.000 --> 01:02:44.280
in the middle of like selecting well.

1081
01:02:44.280 --> 01:02:47.280
And so I think last time I didn't really know

1082
01:02:47.280 --> 01:02:52.280
what to look for, what red flags looked like.

1083
01:02:53.880 --> 01:02:57.000
And I really didn't select well for myself.

1084
01:02:57.000 --> 01:03:00.320
And then I know other people, like I know friends

1085
01:03:00.320 --> 01:03:03.480
who have been single for a long time

1086
01:03:03.480 --> 01:03:04.920
and it's really easy to say,

1087
01:03:04.920 --> 01:03:06.960
it's really easy to kind of look from the outside in

1088
01:03:06.960 --> 01:03:10.040
and say, okay, bro, you're being way too picky.

1089
01:03:10.040 --> 01:03:14.160
Like you're making a lot of mountains out of molehills.

1090
01:03:14.160 --> 01:03:18.200
You know, your selection criteria is so limiting

1091
01:03:18.200 --> 01:03:20.800
that I don't think that woman exists.

1092
01:03:20.800 --> 01:03:23.880
And if you do find her, it's, you know,

1093
01:03:23.880 --> 01:03:25.040
she may not be into you.

1094
01:03:25.040 --> 01:03:29.080
Like you're so selective, you're too selective.

1095
01:03:29.080 --> 01:03:31.440
And so then that, I guess I'm just looking for like,

1096
01:03:31.440 --> 01:03:33.040
maybe if you have some general guidelines

1097
01:03:33.040 --> 01:03:37.160
on how to be wise in that middle ground

1098
01:03:37.160 --> 01:03:39.600
and like discerning and know like,

1099
01:03:39.600 --> 01:03:41.400
what are your non-negotiables?

1100
01:03:41.400 --> 01:03:42.480
What are your negotiables?

1101
01:03:42.520 --> 01:03:46.520
You know, like maybe there are things that are bugging me

1102
01:03:46.520 --> 01:03:49.000
that are a result of my own immaturity

1103
01:03:49.000 --> 01:03:51.920
and not at like a actual disqualifier.

1104
01:03:52.960 --> 01:03:54.120
And then, you know, so like,

1105
01:03:54.120 --> 01:03:56.520
that's a own revealing for my own heart work.

1106
01:03:56.520 --> 01:03:58.600
Yeah, does that make sense?

1107
01:03:58.600 --> 01:03:59.440
Kind of where I'm coming from.

1108
01:03:59.440 --> 01:04:00.280
Yeah, no, I know.

1109
01:04:00.280 --> 01:04:01.720
And it totally makes sense because here's,

1110
01:04:01.720 --> 01:04:06.400
I have this feeling that men and women,

1111
01:04:07.400 --> 01:04:10.840
especially good men and women of faith

1112
01:04:11.840 --> 01:04:15.360
all have a tendency to be way more in their way

1113
01:04:15.360 --> 01:04:20.360
in that area than even a lot of other people.

1114
01:04:22.840 --> 01:04:27.840
But I think that's also true of just men and women right now

1115
01:04:28.920 --> 01:04:30.440
in this age that we live in.

1116
01:04:30.440 --> 01:04:35.440
So it's a global, very modern problem, right?

1117
01:04:35.560 --> 01:04:39.280
Just humanity problem right now, okay?

1118
01:04:39.360 --> 01:04:41.080
And then boil it down to sort of like

1119
01:04:41.080 --> 01:04:44.400
a Christian community type of thing.

1120
01:04:44.400 --> 01:04:46.200
I think there are other things and layers

1121
01:04:46.200 --> 01:04:48.840
in sort of like the religious nature,

1122
01:04:48.840 --> 01:04:53.840
the Christian nature, like that are added on to,

1123
01:04:56.000 --> 01:04:58.360
you know, this problem of like,

1124
01:04:58.360 --> 01:05:00.000
all the things got to line up.

1125
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:03.760
And so we battle that a lot within this community

1126
01:05:05.080 --> 01:05:07.520
But at the same time, it's true

1127
01:05:08.120 --> 01:05:15.080
You know when you have been down the road in a previous marriage for instance or even a previous long-term relationship

1128
01:05:16.200 --> 01:05:18.520
It is very like yeah, it's very

1129
01:05:21.800 --> 01:05:27.000
Off-putting to be like, oh my god, what if I'm what if I make this wrong choice, you know?

1130
01:05:27.000 --> 01:05:31.240
What if I make the same mistake that I made before blah blah blah. Um, I

1131
01:05:32.040 --> 01:05:34.040
Have had the thought

1132
01:05:34.920 --> 01:05:38.880
Now being married again during my second marriage well into it

1133
01:05:39.400 --> 01:05:42.000
Going back thinking about like what happened

1134
01:05:42.000 --> 01:05:46.360
Like why did I marry my my wife to begin my first wife to begin with we got married young

1135
01:05:47.560 --> 01:05:52.920
Early 20s. I'm not saying that's bad or good, but I got married young and I'm like

1136
01:05:53.240 --> 01:05:56.920
Yes, where were all the people in my life

1137
01:05:58.240 --> 01:06:00.240
That said hey

1138
01:06:00.760 --> 01:06:04.800
Did you ever think about this? Did you think where were all the roadblocks?

1139
01:06:04.920 --> 01:06:08.120
Where was my friends and family who showed up to the wedding?

1140
01:06:09.640 --> 01:06:11.640
Where was anybody that said

1141
01:06:12.240 --> 01:06:13.600
Hey, are you?

1142
01:06:13.600 --> 01:06:17.000
Are you two really like designed to like?

1143
01:06:17.720 --> 01:06:21.680
Go together be married that kind of stuff like question it even question it

1144
01:06:22.920 --> 01:06:27.040
I'm not saying that there was a lot of signs that like as we were in a very like

1145
01:06:27.840 --> 01:06:32.960
Church community. It was kind of like we've gone together for a long time. It was kind of like the next best thing

1146
01:06:33.120 --> 01:06:38.940
It's just kind of like it's funny because here's here's the sort of the church thing in church culture

1147
01:06:39.000 --> 01:06:41.360
That's normal that happens all the time

1148
01:06:42.080 --> 01:06:46.240
but I know a lot of stories of people that got married young like that and

1149
01:06:47.120 --> 01:06:49.120
They didn't work out for whatever reason

1150
01:06:49.760 --> 01:06:52.720
Okay, I'm not saying they married the wrong person

1151
01:06:53.280 --> 01:06:55.280
But there's a lot of that

1152
01:06:55.320 --> 01:07:01.440
Like there's a level of maturity that maybe they weren't able to or didn't feel like was necessary to walk into

1153
01:07:01.640 --> 01:07:03.640
Before they made that choice on

1154
01:07:04.040 --> 01:07:06.160
the other side of that coin

1155
01:07:07.680 --> 01:07:14.640
There's equally as many or probably more stories of people who got married young and they just made it

1156
01:07:15.200 --> 01:07:16.800
They made it work

1157
01:07:16.800 --> 01:07:18.000
Why?

1158
01:07:18.000 --> 01:07:25.040
Nothing to do with Christianity nothing to do with church. They were just people that said, you know, what that's the way this thing works

1159
01:07:25.880 --> 01:07:33.800
So in a large part the marriage relationship is definitely like the most refining the most

1160
01:07:35.160 --> 01:07:42.760
difficult the most challenging the most rewarding and the most legacy building relationship you'll ever have and

1161
01:07:45.320 --> 01:07:47.320
The best thing you can do is

1162
01:07:47.720 --> 01:07:50.080
To be all in and make that work

1163
01:07:51.520 --> 01:07:52.800
so

1164
01:07:52.800 --> 01:07:54.680
that being said

1165
01:07:54.680 --> 01:08:00.280
That doesn't mean you have to make the best choice because this person lined up and you're matched up on

1166
01:08:00.520 --> 01:08:05.400
24 different variables and you made the best choice and now it is your ability to work

1167
01:08:05.400 --> 01:08:11.600
There's so many people that had to work through so many things. This is the reason we say that you know

1168
01:08:12.120 --> 01:08:19.240
Healed or hurt in relationship healed a relationship hurt and family healed in family because there are things Jackie says is all the time

1169
01:08:19.319 --> 01:08:27.319
there are things about your refinement your maturity your your relationship that aren't going to be worked out until you're in it and

1170
01:08:28.880 --> 01:08:31.960
That's where many people look back and go oh my god, this is terrible

1171
01:08:31.960 --> 01:08:39.200
It's happening again, or I didn't expect this to be that's way that's actually that's actually germane to

1172
01:08:40.200 --> 01:08:42.560
The point of relationship

1173
01:08:44.520 --> 01:08:50.040
You know the Bible even says it that this is a this is an odd thing who could who can discern it

1174
01:08:50.040 --> 01:08:51.840
This is a this is a mystery

1175
01:08:51.840 --> 01:08:53.279
right

1176
01:08:53.279 --> 01:08:58.840
Talking about the relationship between a husband and a wife as compared to Jesus and the church

1177
01:08:59.920 --> 01:09:06.479
Like why does Jesus put up with our crap the same reason that we in marriage would put up with our crap with our other

1178
01:09:06.479 --> 01:09:07.880
part person

1179
01:09:07.880 --> 01:09:12.680
Because there's a greater thing involved and it's easy to say that. Oh, we're just doing this for love

1180
01:09:12.840 --> 01:09:15.840
But to walk that through that is challenging

1181
01:09:16.560 --> 01:09:18.880
that's refining that's hard and

1182
01:09:19.840 --> 01:09:21.840
so I'm not saying I

1183
01:09:22.920 --> 01:09:27.960
Mean like if you want to go with love conquers all it does. That's absolutely a truth as

1184
01:09:29.120 --> 01:09:31.120
long as you

1185
01:09:31.200 --> 01:09:33.479
Want it to and allow it to?

1186
01:09:35.560 --> 01:09:37.560
So

1187
01:09:37.880 --> 01:09:43.960
It's hard to put rules and regulations and guidelines around that making that best choice because it's like in

1188
01:09:44.840 --> 01:09:46.359
one sense

1189
01:09:46.359 --> 01:09:49.080
I'm just like why are you making this so difficult?

1190
01:09:49.080 --> 01:09:53.200
I will tell you my prayer before I met Jackie and I've shared this before I

1191
01:09:54.000 --> 01:09:59.520
just come through the whole thing of the estrangement and the divorce and it wasn't necessarily

1192
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:08.480
Fixed on paper yet because of the court system where we're going through all that stuff, but I was divorced estranged from my wife for two years

1193
01:10:09.120 --> 01:10:12.560
Before I met Jackie and right before I met her

1194
01:10:12.560 --> 01:10:17.960
I just moved into the place that was next door to her when that's where we met, right and

1195
01:10:18.720 --> 01:10:24.840
I moved into that place. I was like, well Lord, I guess this is it. I'm a single dad

1196
01:10:24.840 --> 01:10:28.500
I've got kids and I've got a ministry job that I'm still working at

1197
01:10:28.500 --> 01:10:33.500
I said Lord, I don't want to be single the rest of my life

1198
01:10:34.940 --> 01:10:41.060
But at the same time I've got these kids and I've got this ministry career that I'm doing

1199
01:10:41.060 --> 01:10:47.900
And so if I meet somebody, I mean she's this person has to love Jesus. This person has to have their own

1200
01:10:48.940 --> 01:10:50.940
relationship with you I

1201
01:10:51.780 --> 01:10:58.040
Can't sacrifice my kids for the sake of this other person and I've got this lifestyle

1202
01:10:58.740 --> 01:11:03.380
That I can't afford to change right now. Like I don't have anywhere else to go

1203
01:11:04.940 --> 01:11:06.940
And that was it

1204
01:11:07.500 --> 01:11:10.500
It was like that was if that was my list that was my list

1205
01:11:11.140 --> 01:11:16.120
And I don't know how specific you think that may or may not be but that was basically my prayer and it's just like okay

1206
01:11:16.120 --> 01:11:18.120
Lord, I just I don't know and

1207
01:11:19.340 --> 01:11:23.100
Then it wasn't like within a month later or something like that. That's when I met Jackie

1208
01:11:23.620 --> 01:11:27.500
And I was like I was struck by her beauty and I was intrigued by her

1209
01:11:27.980 --> 01:11:33.700
But I didn't I wasn't that it wasn't the first thing. I thought wasn't like I'm gonna marry this woman. I mean, I wasn't like that

1210
01:11:34.940 --> 01:11:39.860
We became friends developed it came over time, but it did come pretty quickly

1211
01:11:40.780 --> 01:11:44.340
And there was just a providence. That's the only thing I know how to describe it

1212
01:11:45.820 --> 01:11:49.980
You know probably some of our other details of our story there was this moment we said, you know, I

1213
01:11:49.980 --> 01:11:54.020
Think we're probably gonna get married and that was the strangest thing

1214
01:11:54.540 --> 01:11:58.580
Why would we say that to each other? Why would we go on a walk and look at each other and go?

1215
01:11:58.580 --> 01:12:04.580
Yeah, I think I think it probably you know with us. I ended up, you know, and that's getting married. We weren't even dating

1216
01:12:06.220 --> 01:12:11.060
You're like what the heck like why would you say that like what did that even come from?

1217
01:12:11.740 --> 01:12:13.740
And I'm like, I don't know. I

1218
01:12:14.620 --> 01:12:18.380
Can't tell you if that was just I can tell I can spiritually tell you

1219
01:12:18.380 --> 01:12:20.420
I can tell I can spiritual eyes and go

1220
01:12:20.420 --> 01:12:21.900
Oh, that was the Lord and is okay

1221
01:12:21.900 --> 01:12:26.020
The words came out of my mouth and I can I can I can make that sound really great

1222
01:12:27.580 --> 01:12:30.660
But honestly with you that that's just what happened those are the facts

1223
01:12:31.660 --> 01:12:34.340
So I guess I'm just trying to share with you the raw facts

1224
01:12:35.180 --> 01:12:41.340
For you to make it make it for whatever it makes sense to you because for me to give you a guideline to say

1225
01:12:41.740 --> 01:12:46.460
Well when this happens or when that's the thing or within this we know this is an indicator for whatever

1226
01:12:46.620 --> 01:12:51.420
Because this is totally different for everybody. It's like everybody's salvation story. I am blown away

1227
01:12:52.860 --> 01:12:54.860
About stories I

1228
01:12:54.860 --> 01:12:57.980
hear about when people really met Jesus for the first time and

1229
01:12:58.780 --> 01:13:01.060
Just the unorthodox way it happened

1230
01:13:01.700 --> 01:13:08.340
You know and I'm like that's so awesome. God is so amazing how he just reveals himself to people in ways that are just so

1231
01:13:09.060 --> 01:13:13.740
Not the script not the plan not the way it's supposed to work

1232
01:13:14.460 --> 01:13:15.780
right

1233
01:13:15.780 --> 01:13:20.660
so it's kind of like, you know in one sense you just have to you you're you're on this journey and

1234
01:13:21.500 --> 01:13:26.300
Like my advice to young men is it's like hey, do you like this girl? Are you really into her?

1235
01:13:26.300 --> 01:13:32.020
I mean, is she just I mean does she like excite you, you know, and so like I just can't stop thinking about her

1236
01:13:32.020 --> 01:13:38.780
I'm really excited about her, you know, like yeah, I'm so totally attracted to her. Yeah, and then like does she love Jesus?

1237
01:13:39.460 --> 01:13:41.700
Well, yeah, she loves Jesus, you know like

1238
01:13:42.420 --> 01:13:44.340
This I didn't ask

1239
01:13:44.340 --> 01:13:47.460
whether she has her theology straight or whether she's a

1240
01:13:47.700 --> 01:13:52.820
Conspiracy theorist or whether she who she voted for in the last election. I'd ask anything

1241
01:13:52.820 --> 01:13:58.420
I just said does she love Jesus? Does she have a personal relationship with the Lord? Yes or no?

1242
01:14:00.100 --> 01:14:05.740
You know none of that other crap and then it's like are you are you guys like

1243
01:14:06.620 --> 01:14:08.700
Headed in the similar direction in life

1244
01:14:08.860 --> 01:14:12.580
Yeah, you know, I think so and

1245
01:14:13.580 --> 01:14:15.580
Then it's like what more do you need?

1246
01:14:16.300 --> 01:14:22.940
Then it then literally at that point. It just becomes like Jackie says it literally becomes a yes until it's a no. I

1247
01:14:25.580 --> 01:14:29.300
Mean that's if there's any guidelines, I mean, that's it

1248
01:14:31.020 --> 01:14:33.020
You know, I chime in for a sec

1249
01:14:33.060 --> 01:14:34.980
I chime in for a sec

1250
01:14:34.980 --> 01:14:39.900
yeah, man, because this is kind of my wheelhouse like as far as relational things right and

1251
01:14:40.500 --> 01:14:43.860
One of the things that I never paid attention to was my nervous system

1252
01:14:44.580 --> 01:14:48.820
Yeah, when you're with somebody now, this can be trauma related

1253
01:14:48.820 --> 01:14:52.220
I just so but it is also one of those indicators

1254
01:14:52.380 --> 01:14:59.500
Like if you find somebody that you're at peace with and you dig them and your nervous systems chill, right? That's a good sign

1255
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:05.520
Now, if you're there and you're agitated for some reason or you're nervous, what I mean

1256
01:15:05.520 --> 01:15:10.000
is if you come in there, if you feel like you're walking on eggshells, that's an indicator

1257
01:15:10.000 --> 01:15:11.000
of something.

1258
01:15:11.000 --> 01:15:17.480
It could be of your past or the fact that your past is intersecting this relationship

1259
01:15:17.480 --> 01:15:24.160
or they're manipulative and you feel like they're a bomb.

1260
01:15:24.160 --> 01:15:29.120
One of the things I just encourage you, make sure that you pay attention to your nervous

1261
01:15:29.120 --> 01:15:33.480
system and how you feel around them.

1262
01:15:33.480 --> 01:15:40.160
That's one of the dangerous things about the swoon, like when somebody love bombs you,

1263
01:15:40.160 --> 01:15:43.480
you're not listening to all, you're like, this is amazing.

1264
01:15:43.480 --> 01:15:50.880
But you're not listening to, hey, my gut instinct is telling me something.

1265
01:15:50.880 --> 01:15:53.760
I think, yeah, Jesus is number one for me.

1266
01:15:53.760 --> 01:15:55.160
Are they sold out for Jesus?

1267
01:15:55.160 --> 01:15:58.960
Because if they're sold out for Jesus and you're sold out for Jesus, no matter what

1268
01:15:58.960 --> 01:16:03.560
comes at you, you will end up in the same place if you listen.

1269
01:16:03.560 --> 01:16:04.840
So that's just my thing.

1270
01:16:04.840 --> 01:16:08.280
But I think too often people don't really pay attention to what their body is telling

1271
01:16:08.280 --> 01:16:09.280
them as well.

1272
01:16:09.280 --> 01:16:10.280
Yeah.

1273
01:16:10.280 --> 01:16:19.680
It was funny because going back to when I met Jackie, you know, we were not in a super,

1274
01:16:19.680 --> 01:16:22.760
I was in a ministry position, so I was doing ministry.

1275
01:16:22.760 --> 01:16:24.440
So I was actively involved in ministry.

1276
01:16:24.720 --> 01:16:32.200
So I was definitely being activated spiritually in what I was doing with my career.

1277
01:16:32.200 --> 01:16:36.480
But at the same time, I was on a back burner of that experience because of what happened

1278
01:16:36.480 --> 01:16:39.400
to me in my previous relationship.

1279
01:16:39.400 --> 01:16:46.840
And then she was in the midst of just this upheaval in her church that happened when

1280
01:16:46.840 --> 01:16:49.040
we met.

1281
01:16:49.040 --> 01:16:53.720
So we weren't in, and then on the auspices or the conditions in which we met, we did

1282
01:16:53.720 --> 01:16:56.160
not meet in a spiritual environment.

1283
01:16:56.160 --> 01:16:58.080
We met as neighbors.

1284
01:16:58.080 --> 01:17:01.280
And everything that we connected on was a neighborly sort of situation.

1285
01:17:01.280 --> 01:17:05.540
Like I was trying to help her get her daughter into a summer school program and we'd come

1286
01:17:05.540 --> 01:17:08.400
over and, you know, after, you know, she'd be after work or whatever.

1287
01:17:08.400 --> 01:17:09.880
It's just very, very neighborly.

1288
01:17:09.880 --> 01:17:14.160
It wasn't a spiritual thing, right?

1289
01:17:14.160 --> 01:17:22.360
So we didn't, so it was actually kind of good because I didn't see her in a spiritual context

1290
01:17:22.400 --> 01:17:29.120
or understand her spiritually until much later in our relationship when we got to know each

1291
01:17:29.120 --> 01:17:30.720
other more.

1292
01:17:30.720 --> 01:17:37.760
So I didn't have that filter to be able to know, oh, she acts spiritually or she does

1293
01:17:37.760 --> 01:17:40.280
the right things in church or she, you know what I'm saying?

1294
01:17:40.280 --> 01:17:47.000
I didn't have that distraction really is what I'm trying to say of that religiosity to

1295
01:17:47.000 --> 01:17:52.560
know that, oh, would I even give this person, you know, the attention if it was a different

1296
01:17:52.560 --> 01:17:55.020
context type thing.

1297
01:17:55.020 --> 01:18:00.440
But I could tell by what she said in this sort of very practical and sort of how our

1298
01:18:00.440 --> 01:18:07.960
conversation went, that despite what we were going through at the time, which wasn't our

1299
01:18:07.960 --> 01:18:17.400
best moments in life, was that at the end of the day, she knew God and she wanted to

1300
01:18:17.400 --> 01:18:18.400
please the father.

1301
01:18:18.400 --> 01:18:21.240
She had a heart for the Lord.

1302
01:18:21.240 --> 01:18:24.300
Was she all in to Jesus?

1303
01:18:24.300 --> 01:18:26.840
Was I all into Jesus?

1304
01:18:26.840 --> 01:18:29.520
I don't know.

1305
01:18:29.520 --> 01:18:35.480
I don't know if it was about, about like, oh, we're a hundred percent sold out.

1306
01:18:35.480 --> 01:18:40.840
So not to negate what you just said, Mike, not to negate that, but there was a certain

1307
01:18:40.840 --> 01:18:42.480
level of understanding.

1308
01:18:42.480 --> 01:18:47.740
Like I had walked with the Lord long enough that, you know, like I know when people know

1309
01:18:47.740 --> 01:18:52.120
the Lord, like, do you know him?

1310
01:18:52.120 --> 01:18:54.120
Like are you walking perfectly with him right now?

1311
01:18:54.120 --> 01:18:57.000
That's suspect, questionable, whatever.

1312
01:18:57.000 --> 01:19:03.880
But you at least have met the Lord versus somebody else who really doesn't know the

1313
01:19:03.880 --> 01:19:05.760
Lord, but knows religion.

1314
01:19:05.760 --> 01:19:09.680
Like that's two totally different things.

1315
01:19:09.680 --> 01:19:11.360
You know, hear what I'm saying.

1316
01:19:11.360 --> 01:19:15.880
There's a lot of people that I grew up with in church that I thought they were just all

1317
01:19:15.880 --> 01:19:16.880
alongside.

1318
01:19:16.880 --> 01:19:17.880
We're just going through it.

1319
01:19:17.880 --> 01:19:21.000
They were having church, doing our thing like their brother in the Lord, all that kind of

1320
01:19:21.000 --> 01:19:22.000
stuff.

1321
01:19:22.000 --> 01:19:28.560
And down the road, like years later, come to find out, I'm like whatever their life

1322
01:19:28.560 --> 01:19:29.560
ended up to be.

1323
01:19:29.560 --> 01:19:32.680
And I'm like, oh man, that brother.

1324
01:19:32.680 --> 01:19:37.000
I don't know if that brother really even knew Jesus ever to begin with.

1325
01:19:37.000 --> 01:19:38.840
And I'm not judging him.

1326
01:19:38.840 --> 01:19:43.280
I'm just like, man, does that, does that guy, like what happened?

1327
01:19:43.280 --> 01:19:45.440
Like did that guy never meet Jesus?

1328
01:19:45.440 --> 01:19:48.560
We were all side by side in the church doing all of our things and everything.

1329
01:19:48.560 --> 01:19:51.400
And I'm like, and again, I'm not judging.

1330
01:19:51.400 --> 01:19:55.480
I'm just like taking it back, like poor brother.

1331
01:19:55.480 --> 01:19:56.480
I don't know what happened.

1332
01:19:56.480 --> 01:19:59.680
I don't know where that fell off.

1333
01:19:59.680 --> 01:20:00.180
But I've had.

1334
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:02.700
I had those moments where I knew people and I'm just like, man, I wonder if they

1335
01:20:02.700 --> 01:20:04.260
even knew the Lord to begin with.

1336
01:20:05.260 --> 01:20:09.180
That's a terrible thing to grow up in a religious context and

1337
01:20:09.180 --> 01:20:11.540
never have met Jesus for yourself.

1338
01:20:12.380 --> 01:20:13.060
Wow.

1339
01:20:14.020 --> 01:20:14.980
That's sad, bro.

1340
01:20:14.980 --> 01:20:15.860
That breaks my heart.

1341
01:20:17.580 --> 01:20:20.700
And I know a lot of, I know a lot of good meaning, well-meaning

1342
01:20:20.700 --> 01:20:29.400
Christian church people that, you know, I don't, I'm not saying that

1343
01:20:29.400 --> 01:20:32.400
when bad things happen to Christian people, that that's an indicator.

1344
01:20:33.000 --> 01:20:38.520
I'm saying, I'm talking about, I'm talking about people who are obviously

1345
01:20:38.520 --> 01:20:44.520
not developing in their, their faith as you think they might, would have

1346
01:20:45.600 --> 01:20:47.680
a number of years later, you know what I'm saying?

1347
01:20:49.440 --> 01:20:55.920
Like I went through hell in my version of hell, getting divorced,

1348
01:20:55.920 --> 01:21:02.160
come out of my, come out of my, my, my vocational ministry years and all

1349
01:21:02.160 --> 01:21:08.360
that and meeting Jackie in that hellish sort of situation and like recovering

1350
01:21:08.360 --> 01:21:11.720
from that financially, all the stuff that's going on, there's not ideal at

1351
01:21:11.720 --> 01:21:19.200
all, and I'm like, and for a time there, we just, we were just like having

1352
01:21:19.200 --> 01:21:24.640
our paradigm shifted and we were not very spiritual at all, but at the end

1353
01:21:24.640 --> 01:21:31.840
of the day, I had a foundation of faith from my childhood that has carried me

1354
01:21:31.840 --> 01:21:33.560
through all of that time period.

1355
01:21:34.560 --> 01:21:36.440
And I am very thankful for that.

1356
01:21:37.720 --> 01:21:40.640
I am very like in, that's endearing to me.

1357
01:21:40.640 --> 01:21:44.360
That's a heritage that I did nothing to get.

1358
01:21:44.400 --> 01:21:45.880
God was just good.

1359
01:21:46.840 --> 01:21:48.760
God found me.

1360
01:21:49.560 --> 01:21:51.120
I didn't find the Lord.

1361
01:21:51.160 --> 01:21:52.880
He found us and our family.

1362
01:21:53.760 --> 01:21:57.120
And there was maybe somebody in our past that was praying for that.

1363
01:21:57.120 --> 01:21:58.160
I do not know that.

1364
01:21:59.480 --> 01:22:02.520
And so that is like, that's like, wow, that's amazing.

1365
01:22:03.080 --> 01:22:09.160
So if you have that in your heritage, I believe all of you on this call have

1366
01:22:09.160 --> 01:22:16.760
had that moment of authentic encounter, know Jesus, like regardless of where,

1367
01:22:16.800 --> 01:22:20.960
you know, like what spiritual discipline or discipleship you've ever had or

1368
01:22:20.960 --> 01:22:26.600
didn't have, I know for a fact, cause I know each something about each one of

1369
01:22:26.600 --> 01:22:34.160
you and based on how you talk, I know that you guys know God, there's no doubt

1370
01:22:34.160 --> 01:22:37.440
in my mind, there's not one person on this call or some of the other people

1371
01:22:37.440 --> 01:22:41.000
that come, it's pretty obvious.

1372
01:22:41.120 --> 01:22:45.160
You talk to somebody for five minutes and say, oh, I know the Lord.

1373
01:22:46.120 --> 01:22:49.120
Yeah, I know that's powerful.

1374
01:22:49.760 --> 01:22:51.640
That'll carry you through some stuff.

1375
01:22:53.080 --> 01:22:56.320
And so be encouraged and be lifted up by that tonight.

1376
01:22:57.680 --> 01:23:04.840
Um, I guess when I say somebody, you know, loves Jesus, you know, they've

1377
01:23:04.840 --> 01:23:09.880
met him at least once, twice.

1378
01:23:09.880 --> 01:23:21.920
So I don't know if that made any sense to you guys, but, um, maybe, maybe you're,

1379
01:23:21.920 --> 01:23:24.720
maybe you all are reconnecting with your first love at this moment.

1380
01:23:24.720 --> 01:23:25.040
I don't know.

1381
01:23:25.040 --> 01:23:28.000
Maybe you're, maybe there's a couple of thoughts of people that are like, you

1382
01:23:28.000 --> 01:23:30.160
know what, it wasn't perfect.

1383
01:23:30.400 --> 01:23:33.680
I went through some stuff, but I tell you, there was that one moment

1384
01:23:33.680 --> 01:23:35.120
where I met Jesus first time.

1385
01:23:35.280 --> 01:23:36.000
Pretty powerful.

1386
01:23:40.040 --> 01:23:40.840
Any other questions?

1387
01:23:44.920 --> 01:23:45.440
Good stuff.

1388
01:23:47.160 --> 01:23:47.640
You know what?

1389
01:23:47.640 --> 01:23:53.720
We should probably be share some of our, like elevator pitch, like

1390
01:23:53.960 --> 01:23:55.400
moments where we met Jesus.

1391
01:23:55.440 --> 01:23:57.960
I'd be really interested to hear in some of your stories.

1392
01:23:57.960 --> 01:24:00.400
I mean, I've been, I've been watching a lot of, you know,

1393
01:24:00.760 --> 01:24:04.840
like God was real or Jesus, you know, like, I would love to hear some of that.

1394
01:24:05.720 --> 01:24:06.680
Can you have your hand raised?

1395
01:24:06.680 --> 01:24:07.880
And I'll take you as the last one.

1396
01:24:08.440 --> 01:24:09.520
I do appreciate that.

1397
01:24:10.000 --> 01:24:12.880
Yeah, no guys, I can appreciate and love each and every one, because you're

1398
01:24:12.880 --> 01:24:15.160
working at something that is just wonderful.

1399
01:24:15.160 --> 01:24:20.440
I, this is a timely thing in which Jackie and David are doing such a timely thing.

1400
01:24:20.440 --> 01:24:25.240
And I think it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,

1401
01:24:25.240 --> 01:24:29.440
it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,

1402
01:24:29.480 --> 01:24:34.800
David are doing such a timely thing for a timely hour for men who seem to be, you

1403
01:24:34.800 --> 01:24:37.920
know, what, thinking, you know, is there a woman out for us, the same for the

1404
01:24:37.920 --> 01:24:39.560
women, is there a man out for us out there?

1405
01:24:40.200 --> 01:24:43.040
And it takes a lot of humility to be able to come in and do the

1406
01:24:43.040 --> 01:24:44.760
heartwork and that is fantastic.

1407
01:24:45.120 --> 01:24:45.440
Yeah.

1408
01:24:45.760 --> 01:24:49.240
As, as David, I've got a very similar story to, I completely went.

1409
01:24:49.840 --> 01:24:50.920
I had a job experience.

1410
01:24:50.920 --> 01:24:53.920
I lost everything except for I lost my wife, not the kids.

1411
01:24:54.600 --> 01:24:58.640
And in doing so, um, I've had to learn some very hard lessons, but

1412
01:24:58.640 --> 01:24:59.680
at the same time,

1413
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:07.500
God was using my personality for who I was still to be being prepared for the future for the next woman I was going to meet.

1414
01:25:07.500 --> 01:25:16.500
And so the hard work is not only important in itself, but knowing that God is divine and God is going to show up and God's got the right one.

1415
01:25:16.500 --> 01:25:22.000
And we hate being patient. I hated that when somebody would say, just be patient, it'll come.

1416
01:25:22.000 --> 01:25:24.500
Yeah, but I want it now.

1417
01:25:24.500 --> 01:25:28.500
Yeah, no one likes to be lonely, but that's not what we're going into this with.

1418
01:25:28.500 --> 01:25:33.500
We're not going to because we're lonely. It's because we know who we are in Christ.

1419
01:25:33.500 --> 01:25:41.500
We know that we're leaders. We know that we have a positive outlook and we can lead our women as men are supposed to today.

1420
01:25:41.500 --> 01:25:45.500
And show the world that this is what it looks like to love a woman.

1421
01:25:45.500 --> 01:25:54.500
So and I'm going to say this word carefully, unconditionally, because that also means you still need to be a disciplinarian with your own affairs.

1422
01:25:54.500 --> 01:26:01.500
But loving her in such a way that all she can talk about is I've never met met a man like this.

1423
01:26:01.500 --> 01:26:08.500
This this is impossible. And so I know I've talked to a couple of ladies on L.Y.S.

1424
01:26:08.500 --> 01:26:17.500
And not to shoot my own horn, but because my love for God comes first, that my Lord talks to me through me to them to encourage them.

1425
01:26:17.500 --> 01:26:24.500
And they're thrilled. And because we men should be hearing from God on behalf of the women of L.Y.S.

1426
01:26:24.500 --> 01:26:30.500
So that they can be encouraged as well, too. So when it comes to prayer and stepping in a prayer time, guys, step in, be bold.

1427
01:26:30.500 --> 01:26:35.500
The women are waiting for you to step up, step in and show that you are men of God.

1428
01:26:35.500 --> 01:26:41.500
And it doesn't matter how timid you are. Come on, guys. You can do it. God's ability to do it.

1429
01:26:41.500 --> 01:26:45.500
I know, Thomas, you're you can step right into that position any time.

1430
01:26:45.500 --> 01:26:50.500
So you're a good looking fellow there. So, you know, as I say, just step in.

1431
01:26:50.500 --> 01:26:55.500
The women are just waiting for us to do so. And I encourage you.

1432
01:26:55.500 --> 01:27:06.500
Yeah, no, it's like the what if scenario. It's like, what if you could be the guy that all these women are looking for?

1433
01:27:06.500 --> 01:27:10.500
I mean, not that you're trying to go with a bunch of women.

1434
01:27:10.500 --> 01:27:19.500
I'm just trying to say, what if you could be that kind of guy that like, wow, that guy is transformational.

1435
01:27:19.500 --> 01:27:25.500
That guy, you know, has a relationship. That guy has something going on. Do you have everything going on?

1436
01:27:25.500 --> 01:27:29.500
No, because nobody has everything going on, but you have something going on.

1437
01:27:29.500 --> 01:27:41.500
And they're like, it makes a difference. Like, what if you could say like I was, you know, I think that's interesting for people to come to that point in their life or like, what if I could be more than what I really am?

1438
01:27:41.500 --> 01:27:50.500
It's like, I'm pretty good for who I am, I think, until you start to talk to somebody else and they're like, yeah, start comparing.

1439
01:27:50.500 --> 01:27:56.500
But I think I'm pretty good for what I am. But what if I could be, what if I could be a better husband?

1440
01:27:56.500 --> 01:28:02.500
What if I could be a better father? What if I could be a better co-worker? What if I could be a better friend?

1441
01:28:03.500 --> 01:28:14.500
And notice I didn't say, notice I could be a better Christian or be a better lover of God, because I don't think that's anything to pertain to be better at.

1442
01:28:14.500 --> 01:28:23.500
Because I think that's, I think the more you allow God to love you, because the Bible says that he loved you what?

1443
01:28:24.500 --> 01:28:33.500
First. So you can't show off to God and love him better just to be a better lover of God.

1444
01:28:33.500 --> 01:28:41.500
You have to recognize the fact that he loved you first, and then that enables you to be able to be a lover to others.

1445
01:28:41.500 --> 01:28:54.500
That's powerful, guys. What if you could be a better lover of people, a better friend, a better encourager, just a better man, right?

1446
01:28:54.500 --> 01:29:02.500
Because you're allowing the love of God and the passion of God to come through you in a masculine way.

1447
01:29:02.500 --> 01:29:09.500
That's powerful, man. That's attractive. So good.

1448
01:29:10.500 --> 01:29:20.500
I love that. Although those words, Kenton, thank you so much for encouraging us, because that just makes us go harder and go longer.

1449
01:29:20.500 --> 01:29:37.500
Instead of being so concerned or being so aware of our own insecurities and our own stuff.

1450
01:29:37.500 --> 01:29:44.500
So set aside what we're concerned about, our own stuff and our own worries and our own thing and our own situation,

1451
01:29:44.500 --> 01:29:54.500
and step into, what if I could be that compelling, incredible man that these women are looking for?

1452
01:29:54.500 --> 01:29:59.500
I think I could. And then it's just about showing up.

1453
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:14.120
So, I love it! Guys, we could go on and on and on, but I have a wife to attend to.

1454
01:30:14.120 --> 01:30:24.120
She's like, come on over. What are you doing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Real quick, David, before you jump off, I

1455
01:30:24.120 --> 01:30:29.480
wanted to connect with you on that fasting that you're doing. Yeah. I dropped

1456
01:30:29.480 --> 01:30:35.840
a hundred pounds from fasting. Sheer fasting, like no food, just water only, or like?

1457
01:30:35.840 --> 01:30:40.440
No, I took a meal replacement on my fasting days. That was about 240 calories.

1458
01:30:40.440 --> 01:30:46.440
And the most effective thing for me that worked out, in short, was eat healthy,

1459
01:30:46.440 --> 01:30:53.240
clean for a day, no alcohol the whole time you're doing it. Yeah. So, eat clean

1460
01:30:53.240 --> 01:30:57.320
one day, fast the other day, and just keep alternating it. It revs up your

1461
01:30:57.320 --> 01:31:07.800
metabolism. Oh, every other day. Yep, and just do 10,000 steps in a row, not just spread

1462
01:31:07.800 --> 01:31:14.200
across the day. Right. Like every single day, just go for 10,000 steps. It can be

1463
01:31:14.200 --> 01:31:20.440
flat ground, does not have to be a mountain, doesn't have to be an incline.

1464
01:31:21.400 --> 01:31:28.840
Okay. And I can send you the information on the supplements I use. You can

1465
01:31:28.840 --> 01:31:36.440
honestly go for really any good, healthy, clean supplements. Like, it's just like

1466
01:31:36.440 --> 01:31:44.920
organic greens and reds, BCAAs, so that you don't cut down on muscle loss, MCT

1467
01:31:44.920 --> 01:31:52.440
oil powder, collagen peptides. All of them taste horrible compared to actual food.

1468
01:31:53.560 --> 01:32:00.760
The ones I drink are like pale and crushed up Smarties. So, you know, the Smarties is

1469
01:32:00.760 --> 01:32:08.440
at least a positive. You put Smarties in your drink? No, but it tastes like the organic

1470
01:32:08.440 --> 01:32:14.680
greens and reds taste like crushed up Smarties is like the best way I could equate that flavor.

1471
01:32:14.680 --> 01:32:19.800
Someone else is like, oh, this tastes like Fruity Pebbles. I'm like, whatever keeps you motivated.

1472
01:32:19.800 --> 01:32:27.640
But yeah, I don't think there's a way for me to share the photo on here.

1473
01:32:28.280 --> 01:32:34.280
But I was like 250 pounds when I got out of the army. We'd like to see that. We'd like to see

1474
01:32:34.280 --> 01:32:39.320
that photo next week. How do I share it? How do I share it in here? I just print it off and show

1475
01:32:39.320 --> 01:32:46.200
you it, I guess. Or if you're joining your Zoom by your computer, you could share

1476
01:32:47.320 --> 01:32:52.680
a screenshot. Yeah, I'll have to make sure to put that as a profile pic on Zoom on Monday, not

1477
01:32:53.240 --> 01:32:58.040
any of the other days that someone is like, oh my gosh, that guy looks like two people.

1478
01:32:59.560 --> 01:33:02.280
I'd like to marry him, but then he's going to eat me out of house and home.

1479
01:33:03.240 --> 01:33:10.360
How are guys supposed to like measles to gain weight? I only weigh 105 pounds and I've never

1480
01:33:10.360 --> 01:33:16.520
weighed more than 110. Chicken and rice, beans, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, dried cereal.

1481
01:33:17.320 --> 01:33:22.440
When I was a wrestler in high school and in the army, that's pretty much what I ate. And

1482
01:33:24.440 --> 01:33:29.080
as much as you probably don't want to do this, you'd have to increase your macro,

1483
01:33:29.080 --> 01:33:35.320
not your macros, your calories in by a lot. When I'm on a weight gain diet, I'll eat close to

1484
01:33:36.120 --> 01:33:42.360
like 4,000 calories. Right now, I eat 2,500 calories in a three-hour window,

1485
01:33:42.360 --> 01:33:50.520
and then I'm fasting the other 21 hours of the day. And even for that,

1486
01:33:51.480 --> 01:33:56.600
fasting is kind of like internal foam rolling. So it's

1487
01:33:58.520 --> 01:34:04.040
in any other way of weight loss, like macro balancing, it takes your body honestly about

1488
01:34:04.040 --> 01:34:10.440
six weeks to realize, oh, hey, this crazy guy's in a deficit and wants to actually burn this stuff

1489
01:34:10.440 --> 01:34:16.760
off that I've been holding onto for the last 16 years. With fasting, it's like, I don't care.

1490
01:34:16.760 --> 01:34:22.440
I need energy. I'm burning this. So with that, it's totally,

1491
01:34:25.560 --> 01:34:29.160
like, I'll print off the photo and give you a graphic, but it's like,

1492
01:34:29.800 --> 01:34:34.760
geez, like, you look like, you don't even look like the same person.

1493
01:34:34.760 --> 01:34:39.000
David, would you be willing to maybe put some of the supplements you're talking about,

1494
01:34:39.000 --> 01:34:45.880
like on the LYS page for us to look at? Sure. Or I could send it to you on Facebook,

1495
01:34:45.880 --> 01:34:52.280
either way, whatever's appropriate. David Dorman. Yeah. Whatever, however you want to connect.

1496
01:34:52.840 --> 01:34:59.560
Okay. And Andy, to put on some weight, do some protein and hit the weights. Like, you'll gain

1497
01:34:59.560 --> 01:34:59.800
weight.

1498
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:01.480
if you're actually hitting the weights

1499
01:35:01.480 --> 01:35:04.000
and actually doing the protein and having your macro,

1500
01:35:04.000 --> 01:35:05.000
you'll gain weight.

1501
01:35:05.000 --> 01:35:06.800
You know, you'll gain muscle.

1502
01:35:06.800 --> 01:35:08.880
This is what I use for weight gain, Andy.

1503
01:35:10.880 --> 01:35:11.720
And you can get,

1504
01:35:11.720 --> 01:35:14.760
I get that at the vitamin shop out here in Nevada.

1505
01:35:14.760 --> 01:35:17.360
I don't know if that's out by you in Michigan.

1506
01:35:18.320 --> 01:35:19.160
There is.

1507
01:35:19.160 --> 01:35:22.000
But it's like 29 bucks.

1508
01:35:22.000 --> 01:35:26.400
Part of my problem is that I can't digest many things

1509
01:35:26.400 --> 01:35:28.000
and I have to be really careful.

1510
01:35:28.040 --> 01:35:29.840
But it's probably like the impediment

1511
01:35:29.840 --> 01:35:32.080
is I need to get over my digestive problems

1512
01:35:32.080 --> 01:35:34.600
before I can try to gain weight.

1513
01:35:34.600 --> 01:35:35.800
That's the problem.

1514
01:35:35.800 --> 01:35:39.880
So there's another organization called Bioptimizers.

1515
01:35:39.880 --> 01:35:42.960
My vitamin D level used to be like 17

1516
01:35:42.960 --> 01:35:44.960
when I got out of the army.

1517
01:35:44.960 --> 01:35:46.680
It's supposed to be like 33.

1518
01:35:47.800 --> 01:35:51.080
And I spent like three or four years trying to get it upped,

1519
01:35:51.080 --> 01:35:55.040
taking stupid amounts of vitamin D every time.

1520
01:35:55.040 --> 01:35:56.440
Like right when COVID came out,

1521
01:35:56.440 --> 01:35:59.400
I got sick right away because of low vitamin D levels.

1522
01:36:01.120 --> 01:36:04.680
And also refusing to wear a mask or socially distance

1523
01:36:04.680 --> 01:36:06.160
because I didn't care.

1524
01:36:06.160 --> 01:36:08.200
But whatever, you know?

1525
01:36:08.200 --> 01:36:09.040
But no, it's,

1526
01:36:10.360 --> 01:36:13.040
I started taking this magnesium breakthrough

1527
01:36:13.040 --> 01:36:15.320
from Bioptimizers that like,

1528
01:36:15.320 --> 01:36:20.120
it skyrocketed my vitamin D levels to like 56.

1529
01:36:21.160 --> 01:36:22.000
Wow.

1530
01:36:22.000 --> 01:36:23.680
And the VA was like, oh, we don't know how this happened.

1531
01:36:23.680 --> 01:36:26.160
I'm like, it's because you guys don't have brains.

1532
01:36:27.120 --> 01:36:28.760
I told you for years, I have low magnesium

1533
01:36:28.760 --> 01:36:30.200
and it's affecting my vitamin D,

1534
01:36:30.200 --> 01:36:32.800
but you didn't want to hear it because I'm not a doctor.

1535
01:36:32.800 --> 01:36:33.760
Well, whatever.

1536
01:36:33.760 --> 01:36:35.280
I'm not gonna get into all that.

1537
01:36:35.280 --> 01:36:37.360
But anyway, they have a,

1538
01:36:39.080 --> 01:36:41.720
I forget what the actual product is called,

1539
01:36:41.720 --> 01:36:44.200
but if you have a Sprouts or a similar store,

1540
01:36:44.200 --> 01:36:45.560
you can look up their,

1541
01:36:47.480 --> 01:36:52.360
it's like a lipase or a metabolizing protein supplement

1542
01:36:52.360 --> 01:36:55.840
that you can take that helps break down food for you

1543
01:36:56.200 --> 01:36:57.960
if you have digestion issues.

1544
01:36:57.960 --> 01:37:01.200
I'll put all that on the last year single app

1545
01:37:01.200 --> 01:37:06.200
as like a general comment for everyone to go look at.

1546
01:37:06.800 --> 01:37:08.240
Coolio.

1547
01:37:08.240 --> 01:37:09.240
Yeah.

1548
01:37:09.240 --> 01:37:11.400
You guys connected, it'd be good.

1549
01:37:11.400 --> 01:37:12.440
You guys, God bless.

1550
01:37:12.440 --> 01:37:15.920
Have a great, great week and we'll see you next time.

1551
01:37:15.920 --> 01:37:17.400
I'm in India for the next month.

1552
01:37:17.400 --> 01:37:19.960
So I'll look forward to seeing all of you in April.

1553
01:37:19.960 --> 01:37:20.800
Cool, man.

1554
01:37:20.800 --> 01:37:21.640
Have a great time.

1555
01:37:21.640 --> 01:37:23.200
It's great to have a blessed time.

1556
01:37:23.200 --> 01:37:26.560
Is it for vacation, ministry?

1557
01:37:26.560 --> 01:37:27.920
Going for a wedding mostly,

1558
01:37:27.920 --> 01:37:31.160
plus got invited to India for longer.

1559
01:37:31.160 --> 01:37:32.160
Not that I know of.

1560
01:37:32.160 --> 01:37:33.560
So.

1561
01:37:33.560 --> 01:37:34.400
Good for you, Thomas.

1562
01:37:34.400 --> 01:37:35.840
That's awesome.

1563
01:37:35.840 --> 01:37:36.680
So I appreciate you guys.

1564
01:37:36.680 --> 01:37:37.520
Love y'all.

1565
01:37:37.520 --> 01:37:38.360
See you later.

1566
01:37:38.360 --> 01:37:39.200
God bless.

1567
01:37:39.200 --> 01:37:40.040
God bless, man.

1568
01:37:40.040 --> 01:37:41.440
Hey, Thomas.