All right. Well, welcome, ladies. This is your Phase 2 1 o'clock lat check-in call on
April 1st. I'm curious, has anybody gotten April Fool's yet? Anybody? Y'all, I got April
Fool's today. And I'm like, I never get April Fool's. But one of the baseball moms sent
me and a few of the moms a message that her son was getting moved permanently on a different
team in our club. And I was like, what? And she's like, April Fool's. I'm like, how did
I fall for that? I was like, I never, I, it was, it was beyond me. Anyway, I'm going off
on a sidetrack here. So anyway, welcome, welcome, welcome. I see some, some more new faces jumping
in. So good. All right. How many of you are new? I know Allison and Leslie are fairly
new. Allison, this is her first time to the 1 o'clock. I got Ruth and Mary. You are new
to Phase 2 as well. Lulu, I remember you from last week. I got Stephanie here and Stacey.
I remember you all. Heather. Hi. How are you? I do not recognize you. Have you been on my
1 o'clock call or do you typically go to the Ebeneez? I'm new and I listened in for part
of last week's because I got time. So I was mixed up because I'm traveling. I'm changing
planes right now. But yes, I feel you on that. I'm glad to, I'm glad to have you here. So
good to see you. And my gate agent, April Fool's, as I was about to board, he said, I'm sorry,
you're at the wrong airport. You're supposed to be here. And I was like, what? Oh my word.
I would have had a heart attack. What? Wow. That's that's funny. That is funny, though.
At least he didn't like have you going for a really long time. Really? You know? All
right. OK, well, ladies, I am I apologize. I am in a hotel room, so there is just funky
noises. My lighting is off, so I'm going to make do and make the best of it. OK, but
for those of you ladies that are new, welcome. So just I usually do just like five, 10 minutes
of some housekeeping items, and then we are going to talk a little bit about the activation
from last week, what I'm going to have you ladies activate for this week. And then I'm
going to just touch on a couple of things that I've seen in the in the app. And then
I'm going to open the floor for you all to ask your questions. And then we will finish
up about 15 minutes past the hour. OK, so we are going to move things along as quickly
as we can, but getting all the good info, all the good detail that we possibly can.
OK, so ladies, just remember. So we have a lot of you that are brand new. I just want
to give you a reminder that, you know, this is a phase for you to receive. When you come
into phase two, you've come into heart, come out of heart work. And so we still want you
to be in this posture of receiving. So we want you engaging in the community and engaging
with each other. But we are going to ask that you like take your advice, giving in your
coaching hat off. And then leave that to us. OK, I know for some of us that are teachers
or mothers or counselors, therapists, all that kind of stuff. It's just natural for
us to want to advice give. So let's just do our best to refrain from doing that, especially
under anybody's post. That is an ask a coach. We actually missed somebody's response earlier
this week because someone else that wasn't a coach responded. And so there was just some
miscommunication because myself and Ebony are the ones that are coming in and responding
to you ladies. And so oftentimes if we see a comment, we're going to think it's the other
coach that comments, especially under the ask the coach tab. So if that was your post,
I apologize that we did not get to you. If you are on the call and want us to want to
ask your question today, I definitely want to make sure that I leave time for whoever
that was. OK, I also want to remind you ladies to refrain from creating post promoting, linking
any to any anybody else like any other speakers, influencers, pastors, sermons, ministries,
coaches and anything of that nature. We just don't have the capacity to vet out their library
of work on whoever it is that you're kind of posting about. But we want to make sure
lines with what we teach here at Last Year Single, so just don't create posts, don't comment on
anybody's posts with anything that would link to any other ministries, pastors, sermons, and speakers
and such, okay? If you want to, yeah, let's just, let's just leave it there, okay? Also, if you know
that you want to ask a question today, go ahead and put your hand up for me now so I can see
how many questions we got for the day. Nobody? All right, yes, I knew I had some. Okay,
good, good, good. Okay, so I'm just going to remind you ladies that have your hands up,
we are going to, we are going to make sure that we're doing our questions that are short,
brief, and powerful, so if it helps, you can go ahead and just type your question now in the
comments so that you can kind of get your mindset to, okay, I got to be short, brief, and powerful,
this is what my question is, okay? We just can't have the five-minute backstory because if you're
spending five minutes giving us the backstory, asking your question, and I'm spending a couple
minutes on that, and we only really have time for maybe like 40 to 50 minutes of asking questions,
it really only limits us for how many people can go, so we want to make sure that we cover as many
people that have questions as possible. If we don't get to you, if I don't get to your question,
just know that you can put your question in the app, and we will get to your responses that way,
okay? And make sure that you do it under the Ask a Coach. All right, I think that's it for,
oh, one last thing about asking questions. Sometimes I know it's easy to have like more
than one question, let's work on just asking one first, and then if there's time at the end,
after everybody's asked a question that's wanted to ask, then we'll come and circle
back around to that second question, okay? And then just a few more things. Ladies, just make
sure, especially since I got a lot of new ladies here, make sure that you're checking all the tabs
in the app. There's the coursework tab, which has got the five videos, so you want to make sure
you're watching only one of those a week, processing through it, commenting in the app,
letting us know what you're gleaning from that, what is Holy Spirit highlighting to you
on that coursework. There's a replay tab, so that will be our coaching call, so our one o'clock call
is always the one that goes into replay, unless there's a glitch or something like that and we
can't post it. And then our supernatural Saturdays are posted, and then we typically have about one,
I think it's usually like one Sunday activation that gets put in replay as well. So that's where
if you can't make it live, which I highly suggest you come to these live if you can,
put it in your schedule, but if something comes up and you can't, it's most certainly okay for you
to watch the replay. I actually encourage you to watch the replay, especially for those ladies
that go to the eight o'clock one, and make sure that you also watch the replay for the one o'clock,
okay? So yeah, make sure you're checking all the tabs, you're doing the coursework videos,
you're watching the replays, and I think that covers our housekeeping for the day.
All right, so I got four questions still. Again, if you think of a question,
go ahead and put your hand up, your little avatar hand up, and that just lets me know.
Okay, so I'm curious. We're going to take a few minutes here, like five minutes. How many of you
did the activation last week and the week before? I know I had a few people post it.
So does anybody want to unmute and kind of share like what you experienced? So those that are new,
this is your first week here. I gave the ladies the last two weeks in activation
to be practicing making eye contact with men, smiling at them, asking them for help,
trying to have small talk, if it aligns that you can have some small talk. And this doesn't have
to be men that you're interested in or attracted to, just all men in general. Practice making that
eye contact and smiling. So does anybody want to unmute and share their experience? Or unmute and
share with me like what is leading you to have hesitation with it? Anybody?
We got some quiet, quiet ladies today.
I'll say something.
Yeah, thank you.
I feel really comfortable, like giving eye contact and smiling at guys that I'm not interested
at all.
But when it comes to a guy that I think is attractive or whatever, it's like, I don't
know what that's about.
Yeah, no, but just start practicing it and just notice it, recognize it and see how it
works.
Like, I love that you're still making eye contact with people, like with men, even if
you're not attracted to them.
So that's a good sign.
Like, you know, you can make eye contact with them.
That's good.
But yeah, sometimes it can be a little intimidating, especially if we like, like, like we think
they're cute.
Like, oh my, I mean, I know in my head, I'm like, you know, before I got married, I'm
like, oh my gosh, like, do I have something on my face?
Like, do I have something in my teeth?
Are they going to think I'm a total weirdo?
Like, and once you really practice that, like, eventually you kind of can narrow down like,
okay, like, you know, it doesn't hurt.
Like I can still smile at it at an attractive guy in the world.
Like I'm not going to fall off the face of the earth, right?
I'll share something, Carla.
Yes.
Lynn, what's up?
How are you?
So this is, I'm new in the community and absolutely loving all of this that you guys have available
for us.
So I'm so excited to be here, but I have not, I'm still trying to figure out how to meet
guys.
So I'm stuck in my shop.
I own a retail store and I'm here 10 to 6, 6 days a week.
So I'm trying to figure out how to meet people.
That's what I'm hoping to learn, you know, as I continue on.
But I will tell a little story.
The last guy that I dated, we met in a networking group and he was, it was his first time coming.
And apparently when I was introducing myself to him, he has told me later, he's like, when
you shook my hand, you looked me straight in the eye and he said, it just left something.
So it really, there really is something about that.
He actually pursued me hard.
So it must've left an impression.
So I guess looking in the eye really does resonate with them and to the point where
he actually made a point of saying that to me.
So I thought that was kind of cool.
Oh, I love that.
Yeah.
Like just practicing that you'll be surprised.
Like guys will light up, especially if you start asking for help and things like that
of that nature.
It really, really does, does work.
But Len, thank you so much.
So glad to have you here and, and yeah, would you spend some time in this space?
We'll, we'll help coach you through on how to, to meet some guys.
Even as a shop owner, like when you're talking to customers that are coming in, just making
small talk with people, which I'm sure you probably do.
Like it sounds like when, when you work in that kind of industry and that business, like
you're, you're used to having conversation with people and you'll be surprised.
Like when you just start talking about even this program and being single, you will never
know like who you'll meet that's connected to your spirit mate.
Like I'm here in Vegas this week and I was down in a meeting and talking with someone
and they were asking me like what I do.
And I was sharing about this community and they're like, Oh wow, I need your contact
information.
Like you just never know who you're going to meet.
A few weeks ago I was down in Austin, met up with Jackie and David and my husband and
we, Jackie and I were in a shop and some woman was like chatting with her, making small talk.
And even there, like Jackie's telling this lady what she does and she's like, Oh my friend,
my friend, like, Hey, come over here.
This, this lady's a matchmaker.
And like Jackie was able to just share this community.
You just never know who you're going to meet.
And then we encourage even the online dating.
And I know that a lot of people are like, Oh, online dating is not fun.
I've done it before.
It didn't work.
Ladies.
I was the same way.
I did the whole online dating before this program, but I stepped out of my comfort zone
and got back into online dating, but I was doing it way differently because I had new
information and I had a community of sisters to support me.
I had, um, at the time it was much smaller.
So I, we had Jackie doing more of the coaching and stuff.
So she was able to, you know, bring, you know, highlight things that were like, Oh, here,
try this, do this and that nature, which that's what we, what we do here in phase two is we're
here to kind of help you navigate all of those dating situations and circumstances.
Okay.
So I'm glad you ladies continue to keep.
practicing making eye contact um this week though what I want you to do I don't know if any of you
noticed I got some flashy earrings on this is not just because I'm in Vegas and Vegas is flashy
all right but these are actually the earrings that I wore on my wedding day all right and cool
story is I got these when I bought my wedding dress and I was actually in Austin at a last
year single retreat wasn't called last year single then but it was a community and we went bridal
dress shopping and I ended up buying my wedding dress before I even met my husband like I bought
it in May of 2021 I didn't meet my husband until November of 2022 we got married September of 23
and it was the dress I wore and these earrings these earrings was actually a gift from the
bridal um store boutique um owner and so that's when I wore the reason I'm wearing these is
because my activation for you ladies this week is to start stepping into the bride that you
are and I want you ladies to start shopping for your weddings
like go have some fun it does you don't you don't have to go make the big purchase like I did with
the wedding dress now if you feel holy spirit like prompting you and there's something that's
stirring in you go try on dresses and if you find it and you feel like this is it buy it you don't
have to know who your husband is you just have to know that God's called you to be a bride
and you're gonna get to wear it
so do the wedding dress shopping if you want go try on some dresses maybe it's just some of the
decor like maybe you have this vision of what your wedding is going to look like ladies start
making a pinterest board of all the inspo like inspirational like decor stuff start looking at
rings go to a jewelry store try on some rings all right buy some decor for it maybe um like one of
the things or like a cake topper or something like just go have fun with it okay and start
visioning yourself as the bride okay and what I want to see is I want to see you ladies posting
pictures in the app okay let us see what shopping you've done and let's if you buy maybe a fun set
of earrings that you're like this is what I'm going to wear on my wedding day come come to the
live call next week with your earrings just like I did okay all right sound like a fun activation
everyone good give me thumbs up we're good awesome okay I can't wait to see all those pictures
okay so um a couple things before we start taking questions ladies I just want to remind you
that as you're stepping into this phase whether you're dating or not or like even just entertaining
dating you come out of heart work and so this phase is all about like discovery dating yes
but it's also about how to just have healthy relationships in general so whether it's in dating
or with your family with your kids with your co-workers with your friends okay that's what
this phase is all about is now you get to practice the heart work with relationship okay
what I want to emphasize and I really really like I see this happen month after month in this phase
is that we can easily find ourselves starting to pick things apart in others whether it's
guys that we're dating or certain people that we're having to deal with I really want to press
you ladies to start looking at people as to how God wants you to like what start looking at how
God searches the heart and people this will serve you so well especially as you get once you step
into dating start looking at the heart in the men that you're dating not all the little things that
you just don't know you like maybe it's you know how like how they dress y'all my husband
is not a great dresser and he's out of he's out of the room now I tell him this all the time I
even actually show him
this with him but he's not he like he wore flip-flops cargo shorts and hoodies
in the middle of winter like granted we're in Texas but y'all gets cold in
Texas in the wintertime okay I was I was living in Florida we don't get these
below freezing temperatures like you can in Texas and it drove me crazy now if I
took that and nitpicked in the very early stages of dating like I wouldn't
be married to this amazing wonderful like divine masculine man that God
blessed me with and the cool thing is as his wife I get a help and pick his
clothes so he no longer has those flip like he has the flip-flops but he does
not wear them he wears these like super sexy like tennis shoes so that like I'm
like yes for a year and a half into marriage and I got him to finally stop
wearing those flip-flops right no more cargo shorts he does wear some like
athletic shorts and stuff but like we have two boys that are in baseball so
that's kind of just I think a look now but he's got even some nicer shorts
nicer pairs of jeans like y'all don't get so nitpicky at some of that stuff
really search the heart okay the enemy's gonna want to distract you with all
those other little things that are really not that big of a deal right away
okay sometimes the men need their wives to help them in certain areas to help
them grow in certain areas okay so just remember that okay and then all right
the other thing I want to talk on is Natalie I don't think Natalie was going
to be able to jump on but I wanted to cover one of her questions Natalie if
you're here can you let me know I don't see her
okay
okay I don't think she's here all right so I'm just gonna read her post and I
think it's gonna be really helpful for a lot of you ladies because I see this
kind of thing come up frequently through the through the years so she said she's
currently talking to a man who's pursuing his master's in theological I
can't talk today's studies and guest speaks at Calvary Chapel it's been
wonderful sharing in the Word of God and also being mindful of spiritual
boundaries I know he's intentional but I'm feeling a bit of pressure because he
sees dating differently as in one person at a time okay so for you new ladies we
we coach you haven't already watched dating 101 we coach you to not just
focus on one person in the discovery dating process so she's saying like I
know we've discussed this before in terms of not being players but rather
being intentional and not putting our eggs in one basket as we get to know
others to make sure they're a good match I don't think I don't think that I
should feel guilty seeing more than one person I'm trying to find the wording to
help him understand the difference that I'm still intentionally dating for
discovery so ladies I this was definitely something that was a struggle
for me at first and there's a reason why we coach this way because again in phase
two we're doing the discovery dating all right we have the levels of
relationship which are one two three is exclusive four is engagement five is
marriage so in phase two we're gonna spend a lot of time in that level one
level two relationship level two is that get to know you that's where you've had
a video date or an in-person date and you are getting to know them as in are
they fun to be with do we have some things in common are they do they make
me laugh like do I enjoy spending time with this person okay the way that I can
best describe it and help paint this picture is we all have girlfriends right
like we have best friends girls that we like call hang out with okay how many of
you just show a hand have more than one friend
right would it be weird if your friends were like no sorry
but you can't have more than one friend,
I'm your only friend.
Like no, you can have multiple friends.
So there's nothing wrong with
as you're getting to know someone,
because here's the thing,
when you're meeting new girlfriends,
like you decided to join an exercise group or something,
and there's some new faces,
and you click with someone,
and you're like, this lady is super cool.
Like I wanna go have coffee with her,
I wanna find out her story.
Are your other friends gonna be weirded out
that you're like going and having coffee
with another friend?
It's not like you're saying,
oh, I have this new friend,
like I have not even gotten to know this person,
but I plan a cross country trip
with this person that I've never met before.
Like now obviously you're not gonna do that, right?
But your friends are not gonna be weird
that you're going and having coffee with a new person.
So that's kind of like this level two
getting to know you when you're dating guys
is as long as you're not doing anything
like you're crossing physical boundaries,
you're still just getting to know somebody.
So if Natalie is watching the replay,
one thing I asked her was,
has she asked him to explain why he believes
you should only date one person at a time?
So she was sitting here thinking,
okay, how do I best explain this to him?
Sometimes we need to get more information from them.
I wanna encourage you ladies
that when you kind of find yourself in these roadblocks,
don't be afraid to ask men more questions
and find out more details.
So that's what I would encourage,
start there because if the man is like,
I don't think it's right to date more than one person
because I don't wanna be kissing more than one person.
Oh, okay, I can understand
why you don't wanna date more than one person.
I'm actually not interested in kissing
until I'm exclusive with someone.
And I'm not gonna be comfortable
getting exclusive with someone
until I've spent some time getting to know them.
So do you see how sometimes if you ask a question
and you get more detail,
it will help you kind of navigate
how to explain your own boundary.
So we ask you ladies to have some of those boundaries,
like get to know a couple men.
You never know, like one guy
that you don't think is like a top contender
can just rise to the top.
And the guy that you were like,
ooh, I thought this guy was it,
something can happen and he can kind of fall off.
But you're not putting all your eggs in one basket.
When something doesn't work out that you're hopeful for,
you're not gonna be tore up from the floor
because you only were focusing on one person.
Does that make sense?
Okay, I see some head nods.
Okay, good, good, good.
All right, so we've got about 45 minutes to take questions.
I've got Michelle.
You are here.
Did you want to jump in
and you want us to talk about the pattern that you're seeing
or do you wanna wait for another time?
What are you comfortable with?
Yeah, I think, you know,
cause I'm used to how you guys say,
when did that first start happening?
You know what I mean?
And so I kind of did that to myself
and I thought, oh, okay.
And I'm seeing like this one area
where it started happening
and it's basically,
I'll just give everybody just real quick,
just like I'm getting ghosted
or I'm getting friend zoned or, you know, so yeah.
So I have,
the Lord has shown me at least one route
of where it's coming from.
I think there's more
because usually this stuff goes back to your childhood.
So I am remembering one, you know,
season in my life where this was happening quite a bit.
So probably just more discovery time with the Lord
and trying to work through,
it's a revealing for healing, so.
Yeah, that's good.
Yeah, and ladies, and then I think, Michelle,
I even shared on your post before,
like when you look at it as Holy ghosting,
like it really is, sometimes it's God protection.
I know I did that a lot.
I was like, okay, Lord,
like I did not have a lot of confidence in myself
in the very beginning of being able to make sure
that I was liking and picking the right people.
I was easily blinded.
And so I didn't have a lot of confidence.
And so my, one of my prayers was like, okay, Lord,
help me.
in this area. If I am going down a path, remove them." And supernaturally, guys would just
fall off. I even remember having a conversation with someone, and his beliefs were not in
alignment to mine. And he got off that phone so quickly, and I was puzzled at first. And
then the Lord was revealing to me, he's not a lover of Jesus. He's got some cult-like
background. And I'm like, whoa, okay, cool. Glad he was removed. And so that holy ghosting
protection is legit, like a real thing. But to your point, you're seeing a pattern. So
that's why I think just, again, assessing what, when you're on dates, I think you said
you had dates with one guy, like you had three dates. And just kind of walking through
what was the conversation like? Were you passing friend vibes? And just assessing that a little
more and asking God to kind of highlight and reveal to you. And then when you get into
another dating situation, just being mindful to practice and do things a little differently
as he reveals that to you. But know that we're here for you. Anytime you have any questions,
feel free, and we can help you navigate and break that down for you.
Oh, thank you. I appreciate that.
You are welcome. All right. I think that was it. I don't see Lauren Witt. I know I had
asked her to come. I don't see her at the moment. And then we've covered Natalie. Okay.
Cool, cool, cool. Awesome. Well, Liz, or actually, Liz, I'm going to take Heather first because
she's on a plane. And I want to make sure I get to her question. And then I will go
Liz, Jennifer, Stephanie, Lolita, Lulu, and Melissa. Okay, I'm going to write those down
too. So, Heather, what you got?
I'm on a plane. So I did write it in the chat. So
Do you want me to go look there first?
I think so.
I will do that.
And I see some people put their hands down. If I called you and I forgot to write everything
down. So it's kind of fuzzled. So if you still have a question and you put your hand down,
please put it back up. Okay. I am looking for Heather's question. Okay, good.
And then Liz, I see your question for the heart check in for eight o'clock. So we can
cover that in a minute. Okay. So Heather's asking, have chatted and now did a FaceTime
with someone from online. I'm second week, but watch the online 101 because I connected
with him in January and then didn't reconnect until after week five of heart work. Okay.
Question, there wasn't any advice about how meeting someone long distance for the first
time. I'm thinking mid April, I would travel and stay with a friend, but I don't know how
to do this. Did I plan for three day, possibly two dates? Is there a resource for meeting
someone out of town? Okay. This is good. So I actually, I also, my husband and I were
long distance dating when we met. I was living in Florida. He was in Texas. What we coach
in last year single, when y'all are meeting people that's long distance, we really do
advise you ladies to meet them in person within six weeks of connecting with them.
Stephanie, I saw your eyes go up. There's a reason for this. Okay. So because, because
of long distance, you're going to have a lot, probably a lot more exchanges. And there can
be some emotional connections there. You can kind of sometimes even get into more getting to know
you questions before meeting them in person. And so what can happen is you can create this
emotional bond with a guy and then you meet them in person and it's just not there. And so it can
get just really mucky. And so we say at least six weeks in, because by then it's like, okay,
you probably have spent six weeks of really getting to know them. So then by then, like,
at least this way, you're not talking to someone for three or four months,
getting invested in them and then meeting them in person and realizing this isn't a match at all.
So that's why we say six weeks in, but now to your question, Heather,
um, I think staying with friend for sure, or
getting an Airbnb or what have you. Okay, we definitely do not
encourage any of you ladies, even if it's not long distance,
to be going to someone's house, like that you just met, and
staying with them, even if it's like, oh, I have a spare
bedroom. No. Okay. Now, I've seen some cases in our community
where they have stayed with family of the person or church
members of the person. Okay. But I am an advocate for I will stay
in my own hotel or what have you. I also like to see the men
travel to the ladies. If that's possible. I also if you're the
one traveling, I'd like to see the man offer to help with the
expenses. That is something that we encourage as well. Now, one
thing again, because we're talking to everybody in the
community that's watching and replay, ladies, if you do not
have the means to travel, then you really need to ask yourself
if long distance dating is an option for you. Because if
you're going to date long distance, you're going to need
to invest getting to know someone in real life. That's so
important. So I can give you an example, like my husband and I,
he worked remotely in Texas, but his company was based in
Florida. And so it it worked to our benefit because his company
would pay for his travel. And so he didn't we didn't have to fuss
with air flight, or airline and hotel costs and things like that
that was already covered for him. Now, there were times that I
would go fly out there. Because after we had spent some time
really getting to know each other, we were dating for a
while, when the topic of marriage came up, it was for me
to move there. And so I needed to put myself in that
surrounding to know what that looked like. And so I would
travel there, but my husband would help cover those costs. I
think there was one time I probably covered the cost of one
of my flights. But by that point, we were already in a
marriage minded relationship, we were already discussing what
marriage would look like. So we really started kind of merging
finances in that way, like we kind of saw it like, if I needed
some like, hey, I've got this bill to cover, and I paid for
the flight. And can you can you spot like, we were able to do
that? Okay, but that's going to be different for everybody. But
again, to your question, we want to see men coming to you, we
want to see them offering to pay at least something now we don't
know every man's situation, financial situation. And if you
can't cover, that's fine. But again, these are all things like
as you walk through the process, just keeping us informed, we can
walk you through that. So I hope that helps you with your
question. Is there anything that I left out that I didn't cover
that you want more insight on? I know, you know, just give me a
thumbs up or like, hold on, I got to like write something.
Okay, so I will look in the chat then. Sounds good. Okay. As
you're doing that, Heather, I'm going to take Lisa's question.
Lisa, are you asking the question about the zoom link? Or
do you have something else that you want coaching on?
I do have something is that I needed coaching on.
Okay, what's your what's your question?
So my question is, I just finished phase one, I'm an
accountant, I'm working 60 hours a week. And it was very hard to
finish phase one. Well, because I wanted to like, say soak in
everything. It took me two months to do that. And I did
that. However, today, I got on it. And then I heard one of the
sessions before. And then I got overwhelmed. And I got scared
because I've never dated before. I'm 29. I was always busy with
my career. So then I sent an email to admin at Jackie saying,
Can you please move me back to phase one? Because I'm just so
overwhelmed. I mean, the questions are. Yeah, right. Like
I'm, I've never dated before. So the questions were overwhelming
that I heard. So is that something that and also, I'm not
able to give the time needed to learn dating in phase two
because of how busy I am. So if I'm going to learn something, I
want to give it the valuable time that's
needed so would you advise me to just soak in into phase one again for just one month
because it's the april that's tax season right where we are working more than 60 hours so it
would be i feel like for my little heart it might be just better to stay there and just let god speak
to me how i how he sees me then get overwhelmed because i'm not gonna date right now anyways
in this busy time like i can't okay let me let me just give you some reassurance okay
yeah um heart work is always continual so whether you're in phase one or phase two
you can still work on heart work here in this space okay we still we and many of the ladies
that are on this call right now that have been here for a little while will attest
that we are always doing heart work okay and you have access to that heart work content
right you can always back and watch replays you have the a copy of the heart work book
i mean i have been in this program for five years okay i still go to back to my heart work book
i still have to sometimes go through and do heart work heart work is like a like an onion
there's layers of it so rest assured you don't have to throw yourself into dating right now
you can sit back and pace this on what works for you because yeah you are in a very very busy
season of work right now so we're not like there's there's a handful of women that are like
i just need to sit back and glean the information and process and take the time to learn this
and then when you're ready we'll gradually get you dating and what you can do right now you're
going to be able to learn so much from your sisters here on these live calls whether you
can come live and hear what they're going through or watching replays i mean we talk about it all
don't we ladies and there's a lot of times like i coach a lot of times it the same things will
come up frequently because it's we're constantly rotating new women in here new dating situations
so don't feel like you're not where you need to be don't feel like you have to go back i know it's
comfortable there but know that we do we do heart work here and we're not going to throw you to the
wolves we're not going to feed you to the sharks and force you to do any of the dating that you're
not ready for um help me understand like what is the first thing that is so like is their fear
aligned with the overwhelming feeling well the overwhelming feeling was because because i've
never had any relationship with men and i've never dated i feel like when i heard that session i
think it was last week's session that i heard that you were coaching on um i just felt that i'm a
little girl um i just felt that those questions just felt so above what i've experienced like
some some of the questions were about sex and i've never thought of them like i wouldn't i wouldn't
because i'm single um and i haven't had so many men around me who were friends so i've not had
even conversations with them let alone think about somebody asking about sex which is again
it's it's a it's a normal question for them um yeah and that's yes and just again remember like
every single one of the ladies in here we're all on a separate journey we have i mean you all are
coming in at different experiences different situations different traumas yes okay i mean i
like again i i was a single mom okay i like so that was that was intimidating for me
like are are these women going to look at me differently because i have a child and i was
never married but i will tell you like as you open up and everyone is vulnerable like we just meet
each other where we're at and we just love on each other and we help support one another like this is
such an amazing community i wouldn't be doing this if i didn't believe it like i i mean i i
could just say okay i got married i'm out bye no i wanted to continue to keep pouring into this
community because what we have here is so sacred and so special because we all have a different
walk in a different journey and we can you know really learn from one another so i want to just
encourage you you don't have to feel i mean i know it's like easier said than done to not feel
overwhelmed but
We are here for you. We, we, we're going to walk you through it.
Thank you. And so we can pace it however you want. Okay, thank you. Just one last thing and then I let you start your, your coaching and I start working.
So how would I help that little girl grow in me as a woman, because I'm 29 and I probably might be getting married by God's grace. I have faith. I have faith to say that.
So how do I grow that little girl in me that you're not a little girl anymore, you are maturing as a woman and I have matured a lot in past two months being with Bethany, she is amazing.
I'm sure you are too. I get to know you more. She's great. I love her. She was actually at my wedding. Oh, I love her too.
She and I were in the program together. And so, yeah, she is, she's incredible. Um, yeah, I think those again, it's just like processing with the Lord.
I think even one of the things that we teach her in phase two, and many of the ladies will probably attest to this is God is going to give you experiences and opportunities to grow you.
And he's also going to be gentle with you as well. And so I think as you work on the experiences, so the first thing that came up for me was just practice making the eye contact and smiling with men.
Like I talked about the beginning, start there. Like, don't, you don't have to jump into dating, just practice making eye contact, smiling, saying hi.
And again, like, spend time with Holy Spirit and ask again, that's that heartwork piece, Lord, where, when did I first feel like this?
When did this, like what memories are tied to this feeling, this fear, this thought, you know, why, why am I feeling like I'm not mature enough?
Where does that come from? Where the root is? And God will start revealing those things to you and walking through that process.
I also want to encourage you to take out the word, I probably might get married. No, you will.
I will be married. I am a bride.
Now, I might be a bride. No, I am a bride.
Start speaking that over yourself.
And again, just give yourself grace and time to process.
Thank you. Appreciate that.
Of course, of course.
So do we have that eight o'clock live sessions anymore or do we not have that in place?
We do. I'm, let me.
I'm wondering if I may have missed something.
We may, I'm wondering if there's a special session.
I will, when I get off the call, I will message the team and get more detail.
So should I also.
So, yeah, I would just, I'm going to get more detail about that.
Because I'm wondering if it just wasn't put in and it's supposed to be there.
Okay, and should there might be a reason for that because I'm even seeing the next following Tuesday, I don't, I don't see eight o'clock sessions.
No. Okay, so it's not a meeting. It's like, no, I think, I think it's, there's a glitch.
So, I'm going to when we get off this call, I will message the team.
And my guess is someone's going to have to make sure that it gets added in the app on the calendar.
Should I also let them know that I have been assured that I'm okay.
But I don't need to go back.
You can send you can send that email to them and just let them know.
And you're not alone. Okay.
We've had, we've had those emails before. Okay.
All right.
I know, Heather had more content, but while I'm still searching that Jennifer I'm going to go ahead and let you go so that we don't run out of a lot of time here.
That's great, except for I do have to leave in like five minutes so I'm going to be able to straight to me and I will do my best to shoot it straight to you and if you have to jump off, it's in replay.
Okay.
This was kind of regarding the post I sent you a while ago.
I'm in my 40s, want to be married want to be a mom all of those things, but have never really dated. So all of that's kind of new to me and the fact of that the part I'm struggling with is like not feeling wanted.
And you had mentioned briefly like that some of that might be an identity, I do feel like I'm worthy of being wanted.
But I just don't have the experiences of being wanted, so it feels like I'm wanted for a bit, and then it drops off.
And I think where I'm struggling right now.
It's just creating, it's creating this thing in my head that I've prayed about, but feel
like I'm not getting answers of, well, this just keeps happening to you.
And this keeps happening to you because you're not really meant to be married.
And this is kind of the life that I have for you.
And I'm struggling in community as well.
I can't seem to keep friends either.
And like done the work of like trying to see if there's anything I'm doing.
It literally just feels like people just fall off and there isn't a reason.
There is one guy I've been talking to on apps much longer than I should, according to the
program.
And I get that he just seems really busy, but he still seems interested.
And it's the farthest I've gotten.
I've been on apps.
I mean, I've been doing this since I was like 25.
So I've tried online dating several times.
This is the farthest I've ever gotten in probably the handful.
But part of me is like, am I holding on to hope with this person of like, ooh, and maybe
this will happen.
And maybe this will happen.
Not the person, but the experience, because it would just be really nice to have them
be successful at least once.
Yeah.
So he did the last message was, hey, so sorry, like I've been really busy.
I do still want to meet you.
Maybe this weekend would be good.
I guess with all of this, the heartwork stuff I'm trying to do, but I'm feeling like I'm
not getting very far, but also like, do I keep trying to see if this goes anywhere?
Do I just let him go and continue to talk with some of the other people?
The other people don't seem to be going more than like one to two messages, but okay.
That's my question.
Yes.
So there's a couple of things.
So one thing that we'll coach here is reciprocation.
So you want to reciprocate the same kind of efforts.
Okay.
So again, just being mindful, like, are you the one that's initiating a lot with him?
No, I'm trying to be really hands off.
Like if he messages me, I wait the next day or a couple of hours or something like I'm
not instantly messaging back.
Yeah.
I wouldn't intentionally not like, oh, I got to wait a couple hours.
Like, but again, if it's like, I don't have time to do that, then that's, that's fine.
Okay.
Okay, good.
I just want to want to make sure that we're clear on that.
Yeah.
I think I did initiate the, Hey, I'm, I'm enjoying chatting with you.
Like I'd like to either have a phone call or a video call and I was actually just going
to see if you wanted to get together.
It's getting warmer.
So I kind of left it at that.
Then he went on a trip or something and we talked a little bit, just like basic superficial
chatting and I was like, Hey, you had mentioned getting together.
I'm still interested, but that's like, that's up to you.
Kind of leaving that in his hands.
I didn't say that's up to you, but that's kind of what I was meaning.
And that's when he texted back and said like, well, maybe this weekend would be good.
Or if not next weekend, I'll try and make something work.
Okay.
That's good.
Yeah.
And then let him, let him take that lead.
Let him take that lead and see where that goes.
I don't think you, and ladies, I'm going to coach this to everybody cause this, you, you're
bringing up some good stuff just because it might not feel like the pace that you're wanting.
It doesn't mean you have to cut and run.
It just means that they're there.
You're not throwing them like back in the water, right?
You're just saying, okay, it's just not lining up.
I'm still going to continue to engage, but I'm not going to sit here and put all my efforts
and all my energy again, which is why we coach you ladies to date more than one person.
Like you're getting to know them a couple of things that, you know, you brought up was
the hope thing.
Have you gone back into the course work of phase one and watch the hope video?
I've not gone back, but I've taken the things that I took from that of like calling out
the lies and speaking the truth.
It's just that for me in my life, the experiences just keep showing up and showing up and seem
to partner with the lies and it just gets really tiring.
To me, sometimes what can happen is that, and I think I spoke with it, I think she's
on here or she was a moment ago.
I don't know if you've heard any of the replays where I was speaking to Caitlin.
I'm not sure.
I've been on a few, but I can go back.
The enemy loves to send you those lies because again, is God going to say things to you like
this isn't happening to you where it's going to take away your hope?
Is that our God?
It's not.
And I think part of the part I'm struggling with is like, I just wish I had someone in
my life that could send me the messages to say that instead of me.
doing that for everybody else. Yeah. Yeah, you have a client,
so I'm not gonna cry. Okay.
Yeah. And I know you have to jump off quickly. And so I don't
want to, you know, dig dig, you know, too much here. But and we
can we can definitely revisit this. Even next week, I can put
you on, you know, the top of the list. Because, you know, I think
there's some healing here for you, for sure. And just know, I
can almost guarantee there are other women on this call, and
that will watch in this replay, that are going to relate to
where you've been. Like, it doesn't hold out hope for them.
So yeah, and so I know you have a client, so I'm gonna let you
go. But let's definitely revisit this next week. And you're in
the right place. You're here with sisters that, you know, are
going to help lift you up. And it's going to happen for you.
Thank you. One thing that Jackie told me when I was at like, my
like, losing the hope losing the faith. She's like, Carla, I know
you don't have the faith right now. But borrow mine. You're the
bride. You can meet your husband by the end of the year, y'all.
It was the beginning of November when she told me this. I borrowed
her faith. I didn't believe it for me. But I believed that she
believed it for me. And so I hang I hung on to that. And the
week later, my husband dropped into my DMs. That's
supernatural, y'all. Like, borrow our faith for you. Thank
you. God doesn't want you just married. He wants you healed.
And you're going to get so much healing, hurting community,
healed in community, hurting relationship, healed in
relationship. That is for you. Thank you. Yes. Amen. All right.
Thank you, Jennifer. Thank you for being vulnerable. Ladies
like that's what this is all about. vulnerability.
vulnerability. Do not feel like you can't come on these calls
and share and ask your questions and get real and cry and do
whatever it is like this is a safe space. vulnerability is is
such a beautiful thing. It really truly is it really
creates relationship. It really does. And ladies, you're gonna
get vulnerable with your husbands. So this is good
practice. All right. Okay, who did I have next? I know I took
Lisa, Stephanie, I think you were on my list next, correct?
Want to take you and then I think it's Lulu, Lolita. And
then if we have time, we got like 15 minutes. Okay. And then
I see Melissa's hand raised as well. How are you? It's always
so good to see you.
Mine is very short. Okay, if I'm weird, please tell me. So
there's this guy, I have a message on the app. But all he
does is get up every morning and he will send me a long text of
praying for me. And I'm like, Am I weird? I don't know if it
because of my trauma. And I'm like, Lord, I thought I was he
what it is. So I asked him, is there anything you want to know
about me, but he gets up every day and just pray for me. That's
all he did.
Am I weird? So he's doing that in the morning.
Every morning I get this like clockwork. If I could buy a
lottery ticket, if I did gamble, I would could have won. But
that man is going to be sending you a prayer every morning.
How do you respond to him when he sends that to you?
So I say thank you. I don't pray back or anything because I
because he asked me what I'm looking for. I said this is
discovery sets segment for me. So that's what I keep on telling
everybody. And then then once I told him that he should stop
praying for me. Once I told him he said he just get up every
morning pray for my peace. He pray for I mean, it's really
sweet. But I'm just I don't know if I'm just if I'm too
aggressive or I'm too I don't know if I'm just because I'm
used to that type of thing. It just, please. It's also where to
say the law, but I was like, Am I weird? It's annoying to me.
But I'm like, it's something I would I mean, here's the thing
is, I don't think it's weird or annoying. I definitely think
it's smart for you to be cautious about this. 100% like,
and I'm not saying that to freak you out, because we have to be
very careful with the whole praying over and having a
spiritual intimacy with someone that you still don't know. Have
you had a video call or an in person date?
No, this he does nothing I yet he only asked me if I wanted. I will encourage you to have. Let's set some boundaries here, OK?
I would encourage you to say, hey, thank you so much. I do appreciate you praying over me every morning. It is a very thoughtful, nice gesture, however.
Until we've spent some time getting to know each other and we can, is he local or is he like a long distance? He's long distance. OK, so just be like, look, until we've spent some time getting to know each other and we've done some video calls and we've gotten to meet at least once in person.
I would like to suggest that we hold brain for each other.
Until we've spent more time getting to know each other.
OK, so with that and then and then and tell him, be like, is that all right with you?
I that's my that is what I always when I when I set boundaries with people, I say, here's what I proposed. Is that OK with you? Because now you're putting them in a position to have the opportunity to respond and respect your boundary.
OK, so let me feel like because I thought everybody would. I don't think it's weird.
I think it's good that you got some like, hold on, this doesn't feel right. OK, situation, ladies.
Spirit, I'm I'm a big proponent of like spiritual intimacy.
You do not want to me. It's very for me. OK, it feels very similar to physical intimacy.
I'm not going to go get physical with someone if I'm not married, right? I'm not like I didn't kiss my husband until we were exclusive.
Because I didn't want that physical intimacy yet until there was someone that I felt secure with that. Hey, I'm what you know, I'm I'm dating you and you alone.
Same thing with not having sex before marriage like that's a that's a physical intimacy. That's in covenant for marriage.
And now when I'm now, don't hear what I'm saying, ladies, because I know sometimes that can strike up some offense with people, y'all.
We're all grown adults, we're all women, right? We all have, you know, stuff. OK, I say that because I didn't do it that way.
I, y'all, I was I was a single mom and I'd never been married. So that tells you something. OK, I didn't follow that. It was a strong conviction for me that I wasn't going to put myself in that situation again and I was going to listen to the Lord.
So I, again, physical intimacy, spiritual intimacy to me, that's still very similar. I don't want to have a spiritual intimacy with someone where we I can create a soul tie or bond with somebody that, you know, my my relationship with with Jesus is mine.
It's sacred. It's secure. It is one of the most important. It is the most important relationship in my life. I'm not going to invite a complete stranger into that right away. I want to feel safe with that.
Same thing with people praying over you, like sometimes it's like you've got to be careful sometimes how people want to pray over you and then you can say, OK, I don't receive that. I receive that, you know, like it's OK when people want to even with prophetic words. Do you all know that you can not accept a prophetic word?
If someone gives you a word and it doesn't sit right, you can just say, thank you. And you can just be like, you know what? I don't claim that over myself. That doesn't feel good.
So, again, I will encourage you just set a boundary with him, say, hey, thanks. I appreciate appreciate the gesture. But I'm going to ask that we hold something with that intimacy of spirituality. Let's wait until we've spent some time getting to know each other. Let's have some video calls first. And then if those video calls go well, let's meet in person.
And then let's keep me updated and let's see how he responds. I want to know how he responds, because I think, Stephanie, you also had another person.
Am I correct? He blocked me. So he texted me today again because you said to text him and I texted him and he said, oh, I'm a pleaser. So I asked myself, I said, probably I said, I don't understand what you mean by this submissive and this pleaser. Can you explain? And he just blocked me.
Yeah. God protected. God defended. Amen. Ladies, ask the questions. Ask the questions. You know, be bold. It's OK. There's ways to do that in a year.
feminine way. We can ask questions and we can have boundaries and we can still show up in a
feminine self way. There's nothing wrong with setting good boundaries, healthy boundaries.
Okay. I'm glad you did that. I'm glad that he showed his colors and he removed himself.
All right. Heather did, I don't think she's on here. I think she probably,
but she's going to watch this and read, but she said, see, he didn't talk with him during
heartwork, but this is the first opportunity. And I want to set expectations because I want
to date others during discovery. If I have a trip out East, that makes it possible. Okay.
So her going out there, she's already got it set up. So it works. And she really hasn't had
an opportunity. I'm guessing to really talk with him in heartwork, which is fine. So she can just
probably continue to get to know him up into the point of going out there, probably setting up a
video call or two so that you can have face to face. So ladies don't like, if you can't meet
someone right away, jump on those video calls, get in front of them face to face. So you can see
facial expressions. You can see intentionality. You know, I had a guy one time I was doing a video
call with him first and he was moving the phone all over the place. And I could see it was at
night. Like I could see he was watching television because I could see the, like the light from the
television, like flickering on his face. Like, dude, you're not even paying attention to me.
Like, yeah, I'm probably not going to go out on an actual date with you. And I was pleasant. I,
you know, continued to a few other questions and then we got off the call. So I'm a big proponent
for those video calls. So Heather, if you're watching and replay, get some video calls first
before you set immediate plans of, you know, getting together. I was going to say, just set
the one, one date first. Don't map out this like, oh, we're going to spend two, three days with each
other. Funny story. My husband did that when he first met me before he came out, he's like, so
am I going to see you more than once? And I was like, well, can we decide that after our first
date? And he like, he laughs now because he's like, oh, that's when I realized, well, what if
this girl's crazy? And maybe I don't want to hang out with her more than once. So that would be my
encouragement. Meet them first. And then if you're like, oh, this is fun. Hey, I've got some extra
time while I'm on this trip. Let's continue to get to know each other. Okay. All right. I think
who do I have first? Lulu or Lolita? Who wants to unmute and go?
Oh, sure. Hi. All right. Lulu. Hi, Carla. So I have been talking to this guy.
I started as a friend and he has shown some interest, but then he wasn't too serious.
Last weekend, we hang out as a group and I saw that he started to like, if there's a new girl
that he will start talking to her and then show interest. And I started to feel insecure and
so I don't know what to do. And the next day he actually visited my church and I was a little bit
sick. But he, after he went back, he didn't even text me, how are you feeling? And then,
but I saw him texting the group that chatting with the girls. So I don't know how do I manage
that? I know this is discovery dating. I just want to get your opinion, how to,
how to deal with that. So what, so
y'all, you were in a group setting and he was like, kind of talking with another girl.
Right. Did he invite you out to that group setting? No, that group was a fellowship.
So it was invited by a different person. Okay. So it was just, you all were in a
group and this is the guy you're like, Oh, I'm kind of interested in. I want to get to
know him a little more. And you're having some exchanges, right? Because we have been talking
for actually two months. So we know each other during heartwork. Yes. Okay.
Okay. So you've been talking to two months, but this was also going during your heartwork.
Right. And then he has, so what, like what, while you were been talking for those two
months and you were in heartwork, like what did that relationship look like?
We exchanged some, we are both artists, so we're just exchanging some
experience and like artworks and music stuff.
We actually working on some project together.
Okay.
Is he aware that you're interested in him?
I think he might knows.
You think he might, but you're not sure.
What have you done to ensure him that you are interested?
I have helping with a lot of project works,
like finding venue, talk to the vendor and all that.
Yeah, but this is all work-based, right?
Right.
It's not like more of a relational.
So what I would encourage you to do is let him know,
hey, have you guys gone out on a date
or has it all been work-related, all art-related?
Yes, work-related.
So I would suggest reaching out to him and being like,
hey, I know when we get together,
we do a lot of like art stuff and projects
and we're bouncing ideas off of each other and stuff,
but what would you say about us going out
and just getting to know each other?
Like, I think you're a really interesting person
and I really wanna get to know you on a different level.
Throw that out there.
Like, what's your response to that suggestion?
Actually, this week I kind of flipped my feeling to him
because I saw him not so serious about me
and he's trying to like chat with different people.
I start to feel like maybe this is not for me.
That's why I think it's really important
because what can happen, ladies,
what can happen is we can find ourselves in situationships.
We're interested in somebody
and we're seeing them like talking to other people
and then we kind of get this feeling of jealousy
or insecurity because we've kind of fantasized
having this like connection with them
when they don't even really know it.
So I think it's important
and it's going to feel uncomfortable.
Ladies, I'm not gonna say it's super easy,
like especially if you like somebody,
it's not always easy to be like,
hey, I really like you and I want to get to know you
a little, on a more, like a deeper level.
Why don't we go out and just you and I go bowling
or, I mean, whatever suggestion that you want to do,
like some, an activity or a date
that you want to do with him
and just offer that and be like,
without having work involved.
So then it's very clear to him,
oh, this chick likes me.
And then two things can happen.
He can be like, oh no, I'm not interested in that way,
I appreciate it, I'm flattered, thank you,
but I'm actually, you know, whatever.
He can decline and guess what?
You wanna know what happens if he declines?
You're not feeling the weight and the heaviness
of this like, oh, I don't know if he likes me,
all that anxiousness, so he gets let go.
If that's his response,
you wanna know the other responses?
I didn't know you liked me like that.
I would love to get to know you.
And then all of a sudden,
you see him investing some time and energy
to taking that friendship to that next level
because that's possibly what could be happening right now.
You're gonna friend that, you're gonna friend that.
I thought he should be the one initiator.
But here's the thing, ladies,
I know we have this idea
and I know that the world kind of teaches us to this,
that men have to pursue, men had to hunt us down.
Yeah, to some extent, like we want men to be intentional.
We want, like you want them to see
that they're interested in you.
But oftentimes, men don't have that clue
right off the bat.
They're just as intimidated and unsure
if a woman likes them,
that they sometimes are held back and reserved.
Like there's a lot of times like women have to,
like that's why we talk about dropping the hanky.
You gotta give the man a clue that you like him.
And then you can see after that,
okay, it's clear that I like you.
I'm gonna see if you like me in return
because there's gonna be some intentionality,
but there's still reciprocation that's happening.
Okay, you can't let a man just constantly come, come, come,
chase me, chase me, chase me.
Like people don't chase, like people don't like,
think about it.
Someone's pursuing you, they're pursuing you
because you're running, right?
You're trying to go after something
and if it's running the opposite direction,
like, no, you wanna reciprocate.
So Lulu, I want you to pray about the courage,
to drop the hinky to him,
make it clear to him that you're interested
and then we'll go from there.
And if there's some of that insecurity that's coming up,
then we're gonna wanna do some hard work on that.
Again, that insecurity stuff typically
is in alignment with identity and worth and value.
And so we gotta, again, listen,
see what those lies are and replace those lies with truth.
Okay?
Thank you.
You are welcome.
All right, Lolita, I think I have time
to maybe do like five minutes
and then I'm gonna have to jump us off.
I can't get to you, but if you, Melissa,
I want you to put in the chat or in the app your question
and I will look at that today
and I will get a response to you.
All right, Lolita, how are you?
Hi, I'm new to phase two.
My question or either it's just a statement, I'm not sure.
I find that men see me as a friend
and I think that's mainly
because I have always worked in male-dominant fields.
I have always been around men
and mainly like different nationalities of men.
And I don't know, but that's my experience
that they just see me as a friend, a sister.
They don't see me.
And I don't know if it's that I have too much masculine energy.
How has that shown up?
Can you give me an example
of what that interaction looks like?
Give me an example where a man has seen you as a friend.
What is he doing?
What does that look like?
Well, one guy said, oh, I was working or whatever.
Oh, she just like one of the guys.
And I always like to be cool
because I grew up tomboy and stuff like that.
So I'm trying to get into my femininity
so that they won't see me like this.
But, and then it just seemed like when I see men
they walk away from me really fast.
Like they just, and I don't know
if it's the energy I'm giving off or what.
And, you know, and I prayed it.
Is this happening with guys at work
or like where guys are saying that,
or is it like even, so let's take you
because you said you work around a lot of men.
So let's, now let's out of a work setting
are men kind of saying some of the same things?
They just, they don't really look at me.
Like, even if it's not in a work setting, I mean.
Okay.
Well, I definitely want us to like,
I want you to rebuke that statement.
She's just like one of the guys.
We're not gonna pick that up.
I want you to rebuke that, spend some time in prayer
and break that off and speak some truth
over you about who you are as a woman.
Have you watched the Divine Feminine video yet?
Yeah, I did.
And that's what was really tugging at my heart
because I know that I have challenged men
because being in, you know, a male dominant field
and growing up with, you know, all these boy cousins
I have always wanted to be better than men.
And sometimes I am more successful than some men.
Yeah.
And so.
What I mean are masculinity is competitive.
That's just, men are just competitive, right?
And so when you've surrounded yourself with that,
like I can understand how that could,
you could take that role 100%.
But that's why I say, let's start doing some practicing
and like, let's just start breaking
some of those lies off of you.
Like, you are female.
I know, I tell myself that.
I'm like, you know, I know this is vulgar,
but I'm like, your body parts tell you who you are.
You're a woman, you look good, all right.
I have children, I have grandchildren.
Yes, yes.
So let's get you, like, in that video,
in that Divine Feminine video.
I think in that video, it's been a minute.
It's my favorite, it's my favorite video.
But that's kind of why oftentimes in phase two,
I always try to promote.
you ladies to doing like wear the colorful tops and put the makeup on, do your hair,
wear the big earrings, wear some jewelry, kind of start stepping into that where then people
kind of see you like that. Making the eye contact with men and just start getting into practice with
that and getting more comfortable with that is always a good start. It kind of just activates
this like divine feminine in us when we can kind of step in like when I first was in this program
y'all like I wouldn't I didn't wear makeup like I still don't always love wearing makeup. I mean
I will do it like when I'm getting ready to go out and do something like going out to a nice dinner
but for years I just didn't wear makeup and I worked in a environment was around a lot of
Amish and Mennonite community so jewelry makeup all that kind of stuff was just you don't you
don't wear that stuff and so I had to even start practicing just wearing makeup to work
like that was a stretch for me so I would I mean I have videos of like me going live in
in our community because at the time we didn't have the app we had Facebook and so I would go
live and be like y'all like I put on lip gloss today like I'm stepping into my feminine right
now y'all I'm you know or I'd wear like we couldn't wear big earrings at work but I'd go
out and I would I would buy some bigger earrings I would you know wear the colorful tops and things
of that nature and I would say start there and and stepping into that but I think we really
definitely want to get you like let's break off this comment that men have spoken over you like
she's just like one of the guys and I would even give you the courage as you know the boldness
that if that if men say that to you again just be like I understand why you say that but you
know what I'm not a man I'm not a guy I'm a lady like that's who I am and there's nothing wrong with
that is that good yes thank you you are welcome all right ladies it's been fantastic to be here
with you um we are a few minutes past when I needed to cut off but it's all good um I'm gonna
celebrate myself because many of you ladies that have been on here before know I can go
really long time but I have gotten direct orders from Jackie that I have I cannot go past
the 75 minute mark so um ladies thank you again so much I am going to touch base with the team
and figure out um if there was a glitch and to get that eight o'clock zoom call
thing in the event tab so if you ladies want to jump on with ebony tonight um so and then all I
ask is that if you were on today and got your question asked on my one o'clock hold any questions
at the eight o'clock for any ladies that didn't come for the one o'clock to ask their question
at eight o'clock and then you can always circle back around does that make sense
okay Stephanie thank you so much and I know Stephanie I think you I had some things that
I think I need to respond to you so I will look in the app to do that um you like it when I keep
talking girl if you give me permission I I will like I'm a talker um I'm just quickly reading
through some of the the chats here so six months ago Laura began to deal with me about not dressing
to hide but dressing to feel feminine yes the feminist movement impurity culture movement
really affected me 100 percent I mean I understand and you'll hear Jackie at some point even talk
like we understand why there was a feminist movement like what was there was some things
that needed to take place unfortunately it also swung the pendulum where it's taken some what
the women really back from their divine feminine at the same time and so it's really just getting
things back into balance and order because again God is God is a God of order and balance and so
when he created woman he created it for order and balance and so there's nothing wrong with
being feminine there's nothing wrong with you know um yeah like there's it's we were we were
made on purpose y'all God looked at Adam said something not right here he needs a he needs a
woman so um so I hope that
Courage is any any of you ladies that you know struggle with stepping in that divine feminine
And just it's practice. It's practice looking cute. Let's make a bond you here
Wear the earrings. Don't forget go shopping for your weddings this week ladies
I want to see pictures if you if you buy something bring it to the call next week. I want to see it
I want to I want to get excited. All right
Wear the earrings, I'll try to remember to wear my earrings again next week, too. I might actually have to wear these out today
All right, sorry, all right, I'm done now ladies
So I'm gonna release you have a blessed rest of your day, and I can't wait to see you next week