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Hello, hello, hello. Welcome. How are you? Good evening, everyone. We're going to wait

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for a minute or so for everyone to get here. Well, more people. I know people are logging

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in right now. It normally takes a minute or so to get everybody in. And then I'm sure

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we'll have more people join in the next, you know, 10 minutes or so. Welcome. Do we have

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anyone joining us for the first time tonight? It's your first live session with the HeartWork

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program. If that is you, I would love to have you put that in the chat. I think I recognize

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everyone's names that you've been here before, but I just want to check. Maybe Lenina. I

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think I was chatting with you in the group today. Is this your first live session? Okay,

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awesome. That's what I thought. All right. Welcome. We're so glad you're here. All right.

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Anyone else joining us new? This is your first live session tonight. Hello, hello.

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Welcome. All right. Well, I'm going to go ahead and get started. I'm Bethany Cooper.

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I'm here as one of your HeartWork coaches, one of the master HeartWork coaches here in

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the community. So glad to be here with all of you. And I want to welcome our ladies that

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have been here before, but you're back again for more fun in the HeartWork course program.

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That's good. And so excited to see so many new faces coming in each day. Truly, God is

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really on the move and it's exciting to be here with you. I have a couple little housekeeping

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things. I'm going to go through them very quickly tonight. First and foremost, Supernatural

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Saturday from Saturday. What is your water? Y'all, it was really, really good. And just

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even thinking through like the areas where there are those intrusive thoughts that we

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have and they end up being areas that we tend to get tripped up on. So if you haven't heard

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the replay or weren't there live yet, definitely check out that replay. The Supernatural Saturday

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replay is in the last year single app under the replays tab in your respective group.

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And that is where you're going to find that in any of our HeartWork heart check-in sessions,

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it's also going to be there for you as well. I want to encourage you all. I see several of you

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on camera tonight. Way to go. Love it. Love it. For those of you that are new, if you don't know

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this, or if you've been here and maybe you just didn't hear that part before, we love to see you

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on camera. Okay? We want you to practice coming out of hiding while you're here in HeartWork.

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As you're healing, part of the healing process is letting people see you being known, seen,

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and loved, like just however you show up. And even when ladies, not always are we emotional,

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but sometimes we get emotional. And then what happens for a lot of people, I have a friend

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where she tries, like she often will like start to cover her mouth. Sometimes when she talks,

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if she's getting emotional, sometimes we feel like we need to hide or go off camera. And y'all,

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if you really need to do that, I want you to feel free to do that. But I also want you to practice

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not feeling bad for the emotions that you have. Okay? And that might look like something different

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than crying. So don't feel like you have to fit in that box. Okay? We don't want to get into

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comparison, but I do want y'all to feel, because we remember in this program, what are we talking

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about? We got to feel the fields so God can heal the fields. And so keep showing up, come out of

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hiding, be on camera. And then what does it mean even in the day to day, like for you to show up

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for yourself and be seen? Maybe, you know, not knocking it, but the yoga pants, you know, it's

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a big thing now. Everybody wears yoga pants everywhere. You never saw that back in the day.

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And I love to be comfy to you all. I do. But maybe it's time to take a break from the yoga pants and

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get dressed up. What do you think? Maybe we can come out of hiding and actually, you know, put on

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some makeup, put on a cute outfit, go out and experience the world a little differently than

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maybe you have been. If you get dressed up every day, and that's your thing, maybe you need to

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practice doing the opposite and allowing people to accept you without all the stuff on, you know,

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so just lean into whatever the Lord might say to you personally through that and see what else He

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might want to do as you journey and come out of hiding in the way that is most important to your

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walk and your healing. Heart Pasture in this HeartWork course is so key. What do I mean by that?

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What I mean is that I really want to encourage you all to pray daily for your hearts to be

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completely open, first and foremost, to the Lord and what He's trying to teach you, getting really

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good at asking Him good questions. And I'll...

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explain that a little bit more in a minute,

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but also that you, no matter how much healing

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you've done before you came in,

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no matter how many heart healing programs,

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because there are a lot more of them out there these days,

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no matter how much education you have,

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that you would come in with your heart open

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to receive what God has for you.

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Because we believe that God's doing

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something supernatural here,

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and even if you've been through other things before,

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we believe that God has something divine for you here.

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But we receive those things when we remain open

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to receive them and have teachable heart postures, okay?

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Super important.

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What did I mean about asking God really good questions?

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Well, when the Lord starts to reveal things to you

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for healing, that you would be like,

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okay, Lord, this memory's coming up.

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Is there a reason you're revealing this to me?

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You know, why is this coming up?

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Is there something that you're trying to show me?

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Is there something that you want me to know?

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Or come into the group and say, hey, I'm having this,

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had someone just this last week ask about a dream.

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Well, the dream was a dream they had before, years ago,

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but it actually was connecting with healing

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that was happening right now,

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like in their walk right now in the HeartWork course.

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You can ask questions, we can help you unpack that more.

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And so I wanna encourage you to go ahead

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and learn to do that.

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Okay, yeah, I see Helen, I see what you're saying.

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You're learning to be more comfortable in dresses.

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Yeah, ladies, I know this sounds like such a simple thing,

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but there are a lot of people that they didn't,

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like they didn't grow up being taught

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that it was okay to be feminine

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or to feel comfortable in a pretty blouse

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or a dress or a skirt.

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And if that applies to you,

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100% a part of your healing process

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is gonna be getting out of your comfort zone

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and buying a dress, it is.

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And seeing what that feels like

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and allowing yourself to experience that,

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even in the uncomfortableness, if that's you, okay?

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Super important, okay, one more.

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Distractions are gonna come in this program.

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They're gonna come in your life,

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but they're gonna come during this program, okay?

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So just be aware and be alert and really do your best

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to resist the distractions and keep going.

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What do I say?

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Every day, ask the Lord,

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what's one thing I can do to move forward

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in my heart work healing process?

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And if you do that,

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you're gonna make it all the way through, ladies.

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And you're gonna do, not only make it all the way through,

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you're gonna come through on the other side

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and you're gonna be thriving

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and you're gonna be more free and more whole

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in ways that you can't imagine.

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All right, let me pray for us.

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Father, thank you so much for this night.

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God, we thank you for all of the women that are here live

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as well as those that are gonna watch the replay.

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God, we know that even this afternoon,

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you did so much and we're so grateful,

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but God, we're asking you to do it again.

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Lord, I thank you that I get to be here,

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but Lord, it's not about me.

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It's about them receiving all that you have for them.

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So help me, Lord,

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to just be that vessel that you can work through.

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We ask you to reveal areas for healing,

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supernatural breakthrough happening tonight,

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chains coming off of minds, off of hearts,

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off of, yes, Lord, stories.

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We thank you that you're rewriting stories.

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So Lord, we thank you, God,

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for the balm of Gilead being placed upon our hearts,

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our minds, our bodies, our spirits, our souls.

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God, we thank you that you'll help us

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to step further into the fullness

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of everything that you have for us tonight

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as we shed grave clothes and we leave the past behind.

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And we just thank you in advance

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for all of these things in Jesus' name, amen.

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All right, so I didn't know we were gonna go there at all,

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but I just want to mention what I just prayed.

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That was something that just came up in my spirit.

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So we're gonna be talking about overcoming fear

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and anxiety tonight.

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And this afternoon, the grave clothes thing didn't come up,

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but tonight that's coming up.

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So we're gonna lean into this for a moment

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before we move on.

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What does it mean to let go of the grave clothes?

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Well, sometimes we go through things in life

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and they're traumatic and they're hard.

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Sometimes we experience loss

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and it is normal for us to have a season of grieving,

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but sometimes what happens is people get stuck there, okay?

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They don't pass through.

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The Valley of Baca came up this afternoon,

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but what we were talking about is that,

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you know, that's a place you want to pass through.

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You don't want to be in that valley

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of weeping long-term, ladies.

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And so if that is resonating for you tonight,

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the grave clothes, you know, after David,

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after his son died, that he had with Bathsheba,

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he had grave clothes on for a certain amount of time.

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And then when that time passed, he removed his grave clothes,

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he got up and he went forward.

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And so for those of you that maybe that's kind of.

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part of your story is that, you know, you've been grieving for a really long time. So much so that

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you don't really know how to stop grieving. So I want to encourage you to live again and to pray

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and ask the Lord to help you come alive to awaken. You know, the Bible talks about that awake, awake,

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O sleeper and rise up from the dead. I can't remember where that scripture is right now,

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but it is a scripture. And, and I use that in, uh, we use that in the real you and we'll be

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talking about that again next week, but that is coming to mind as well. And so just father,

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right now, I pray that you would just help every lady that is here. Those that will watch the

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replay that you would make that scripture real to them right now, that you would give them visions

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of what it means for them to come up out of the grave and rise up from the dead to awaken and

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every area of their lives that they would, um, not, not be like even lots wife, that they wouldn't

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look back longing for the days of the past because it was easier or something seemed comfortable,

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but God that they would, they would look their eyes forward, that they would lift their eyes

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up to heaven and, and believe for your and suddenly Trump transformations in their lives

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in Jesus name. All right. So there you go. We're moving forward, ladies. We're going to go into

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all that God has for us. And as we start to do that, I want to hear from you a little bit, uh,

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hear right from the gecko. I would love for you to put in the chat this week, or in the last few

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days, it could have even been today in the past week. How did you encounter fear or anxiety?

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Specifically, can you put that in the chat for me? And as those start to come, I'm going to start

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to share a little bit, but I want to hear from you. How did you encounter fear or anxiety?

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If you encountered it, how did that show up in your life this week? All right. As you're starting

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to put those in there. Yep. I'm going to start to read some of those out for those that are not

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able to read them. All right. Through dreams. Katie says it's a recurring dream that someone

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steals from me. Okay. Uh, Katie, why don't you put that, write a post, uh, about that and put that in

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the ask a coach, uh, tab for me and tell me a little bit more about that dream. And then I'll

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respond to you on that there. Cause I think that's a pertinent to your healing process.

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All right. Fear about my son. Oh, fear about my sons. Excuse me, who are deployed. Okay. So we

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have some servicemen there. Some kids that are in this service misunderstood actions by a coworker

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accepting a new job, felt anxious for all the unknown. Am I able to do what is expected? Okay.

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Tension in my body that wouldn't release fear of getting sick, fear of going to bed. Cause it

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takes long to sleep. So you have a hard time falling asleep Helen. Is that what you're saying?

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Yeah. Sometimes. Okay. Anxiety has been coming up when I job search or get rejection emails. Okay.

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Fear that I'll be stuck. And I know we've been praying Amy and believing for that divine job

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where it's going to come. Um, fear that I'll be stuck in my current season fear about my son.

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Okay. Marlena, tell me more about your son. What's the fear connected to you regarding your son?

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Fear about not being able to pay my bills. Um, my volumes up as loud as it can go. Does everyone

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else hear me? Okay. Yes. Maybe just check your volume. Sometimes it can be on your end. And

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sometimes people that have the earbuds have a tough time. Um, I don't know if that's what it

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is or not fear of unworthiness lost my job. And also mom was just recently diagnosed with cancer.

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Aaron, I'm so sorry to hear that. So sorry. Remind me before the end of tonight. And we're

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going to pray for your mom. Okay. Concern regarding retiring. Sue's about to retire.

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Let's celebrate that. All right. Anxiety came up today. I came across an old note in my phone

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that was related to my ex. Okay. Let's talk about this for a minute. All right. So one of the things

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in the pruning season, um, I don't know if you guys remember, I think I mentioned it a week or

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two ago to prune things that are in your phone that are connected to X's. And, um, what I called

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it was evidence. So I don't know if that relates Stephanie to what you're saying there. Um, but

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what I call evidence. Um, so my ex used to cheat a lot and I would like, it was always looking to

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see who's he talking to online. And I'd have all this evidence of all these people. And then the

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emails that I actually like, it was saying they were doing stuff, you know, and I hung on to that

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stuff for so long. Why, why did I do that? Cause in my spirit, at some point I felt like I'm going

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to have to prove that he did this, but y'all, I didn't, I didn't need to do that. So let's,

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let's get rid of all the stuff that if, if it gets

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you a negative feeling, if it's in your phone and you see it, delete, delete, delete, unless you

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need it for a court case. Okay, that's the caveat. If it's in your drawer, or in your closet, and

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every time you look at it, you have a negative thought, get rid of that thing. Let's get rid of

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thing anything that's causing you to feel negative energy in your body when you see it or, or, you

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know, it's in your presence. If you now you can't do this with people, you can't be like, be gone.

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But let's let's clear out some clothes. Let's clear out some of this stuff that's taken up

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space. Because y'all guess what? Maybe God wants to give you a new dress. Maybe God wants to give

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you a new shirt. I have this story to tell you all that I wasn't planning to say, but it's coming up

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right now. So I had this shirt from a trip that I went on for work to New York. And I got my first

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I love New York t shirt when I was there and was super excited about that. Not long after I went

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there. This is way back when I was dating my spiritual daughter's dad. He did this whole

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little deceiving thing and whatever he took them to New York. And they were there when they came

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back. A month later is when I that was the last time that was the last straw month later, I found

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out that he had this whole elaborate plan. He was supposed to meet a woman there. He had his girls

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with him. He was supposed to meet a woman there. And this is someone he had cheated on me with

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before. And you all because it was in and connected to New York every time even though I got that shirt

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at a totally different trip. And time every time I saw that shirt. I was like, I hate New York.

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Like I hate I hate New York. And that was literally what I started saying. And you all it

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that t shirt had nothing to do with him in New York. It's just that it made me think about

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all of that. And so for a long time, that shirt was in my drawer and it would always bother me.

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So I didn't end up throwing that one out. But here's what God ended up having me do. I like

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took that I took that back. Does that make sense? I took it back. So what do I mean by that?

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I started reclaiming New York because when I went to New York, I had an amazing time.

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It was literally probably one of the best trips I've ever been on. This lady wine didn't like I

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didn't go drinking y'all but like wine and dine me took me to all the blessed best places to see

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in New York. It was Christmas time. It was beautiful. It was amazing. And the enemy was

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trying to take that from me. And I took that back. And so tonight we're talking about overcoming fear

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and anxiety. And I think this is relevant. Some of you all aren't going to certain places and

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spaces because they remind you of people. Some of you aren't wearing shirts, some of you and maybe

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some of you need to pitch the shirt. You know, I was already talking about that. But if you feel

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led to wear it and reclaim that territory, then do that. But pray about it and see what God wants

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to tell you to do. Okay. All right, let me keep going. I'm going to read a couple more fear about

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my timeline, being older and still wanting kids. Anxiety about when my court case will finally be

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over. Okay, Rosie, we pray a lot on on our women's prayer about court cases. We'll try to remember

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when I lead on Wednesday, I'll try to remember to be praying over that specifically. Anxiety about

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job search and fear on stepping out into starting a new business. Fear around barrenness. My mom

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died four months ago and anxiety and grief just hit me hard this week and cried my ass out.

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But you're much better. I'm so sorry for your loss. Is it Vernander? Is that how you say your name?

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Let me know in the chat. All right, ladies, I'm going to go back and I'll try to read these when

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you're in breakout. Go back and read those more because there are several other ladies that shared

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and I want to be able to read all of them and I'll be ready with those when you come back from your

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breakout session. So let's talk about this fear stuff tonight. I want to read a quote to you.

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This is how I started this afternoon session because well, I think I actually the Holy Spirit

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kind of started in the beginning, which we kind of started going there a little bit too.

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But this is a quote the Lord put in my heart. There were two things that he said to me this

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afternoon before I got on the live session. The first one I was getting ready and kind of putting

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my ring on and my I normally put earrings and I was just kind of standing there more contemplative

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like like Lord like because I was thinking about Lord, where do you want me to start with the

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session today? And what caught my attention is this bracelet that I got at a retreat. It's kind

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of hard to read it, but it says beautiful and it's got a little butterfly. You know, I love

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butterflies. I think that came up in one of our other sessions. But anyways, I was at this

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conference this week, this weekend, excuse me, and it's called Beautiful. And specifically when I saw

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this bracelet today.

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I knew what we were going to be talking about, but what was interesting, what God said to

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me is He said, there are those that will be there that have a fear of being beautiful.

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I thought that was interesting.

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There are those that are going to be there that have a fear of being beautiful.

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And so when I started leaning into that a little bit, was thinking back even over my

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own life about the times that I had fear, maybe subconscious fear.

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I don't know that I was like, Oh, I'm so afraid of looking nice.

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But you all like, you know, when guys honk, you know, when you're about to walk and they're

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yelling at you, catcall and all that kind of, yeah, I don't like any of that.

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I don't like, I don't think any of us like any of that.

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But what I would find myself doing is pulling back and covering up more, not, you know,

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doing my hair as much, all these kinds of things.

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And so there's this level of fear underlying that was showing up, if you will.

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Some people have a fear of allowing their body to be seen.

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My youngest spiritual daughter, she's like significantly busty.

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And her mom used to make comments all the time about her, her breast and stuff.

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And it became this big thing where she would just wear all these big baggy sweatshirts

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all the time.

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She actually looks quite cute.

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And you know, there's nothing she can do about it.

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That's the size that God made her.

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But because of those things said to her, it was causing her to fear her own body and her

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beauty.

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God made her beautiful.

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But the enemy was trying to cause her to not like things about herself.

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So maybe yours is something different.

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But I want you to really be asking the Lord, is there a part of me that fears being beautiful,

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showing up and getting attention, you know, in some kind of way or getting on and feeling

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like you compare yourself to other people, even on on a zoom like this, you know, where

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you all look and compare yourself to other people and you want to stay out of that zone

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for sure.

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But here's the quote, the other thing that God brought up into my spirit.

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This is what it says.

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Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

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Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

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It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us.

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We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?

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Actually, who are you not to be?

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You are a child of God.

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You're playing small does not serve the world.

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There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around

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you.

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We are all meant to shine as children do.

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We were born to make magnet, I'm sorry, we were born to make manifest the glory of God

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that is within us.

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It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.

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And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

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As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

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When you think about that, as you are liberated from your own fears, your presence automatically

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causes other people to be liberated.

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Some of you are having some issues with your kids.

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Some of you are having issues at work.

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As you come out of alignment with fear and anxiety and panic and dread and worry, and

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you heal more and more and more from the inside out, your liberation will cause liberation

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for other people.

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Do y'all remember this story in the Bible?

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I can't remember exactly.

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I can't remember exactly who it is.

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But maybe Elisha, where the guy was thrown on the bones and came back to life because

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he fell on the grave of Elisha.

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I think that's who it is.

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If y'all have got it wrong, it's okay.

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You can correct me in the chat, but I think that's who it is.

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But that's what it makes me think of.

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It's like, whoa, think about that for a minute, that there could be so much of the Lord in

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us and we get freedom and then it causes these ripple effects and other people supernaturally

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get transformed and healed from glory to glory.

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Y'all, people are going to start to comment to you, the more that you heal, like, what's

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going on with you?

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I noticed something's different.

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Like you're glowing.

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Y'all, some people are going to say that to you.

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And you'll remember this night because this will be the night that you probably stepped

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into that.

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And I'm mentioning all of this to you because I think our greatest fear truly is that we

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are more powerful beyond measure.

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God made us.

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It's all to be powerful.

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But the enemy will always try to come against

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what God has put in us.

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So he uses fear and anxiety daily.

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Daily, you all.

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Our society is more afraid and anxious and depressed

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than it's ever been.

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The enemy is trying to bring all this stuff.

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And so we wanna figure out,

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okay, where's this coming from in us?

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Again, the more freedom we get,

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the more other people,

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okay, Ezekiel, thank you, Helen.

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I knew it was one of them.

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Oh, I said Elisha or Elisha, but it's Ezekiel.

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At least it's got an E, an E name.

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But thank you for that, appreciate you.

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All right, so as we're moving forward,

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I want you to be thinking about the fear and anxiety things

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that you put in the chat a little bit ago.

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I also want you to be thinking about your hearts

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and how impressionable your heart is,

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whether you realize it or not.

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Everything that you see, everything that you hear,

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everything that, you know,

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the people that you're around and spending your time with,

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they're all impacting you for healthy.

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I don't like to say good and bad, but it is true.

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Good or bad, healthy or unhealthy

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is where I kind of like to live

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when I'm talking about people and things.

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And so I want you to be thinking about

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what is feeding your mind and your spirit and your soul?

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What's causing the impressions on your heart?

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Is it healthy? Is it unhealthy?

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Where is the Lord leading you to make shifts and changes

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regarding friendships, relationships, people?

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I was sharing with the ladies that at this conference,

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one of the ladies that was there love her very much,

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but she tends to really struggle with negativity.

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And it can kind of be tough to spend a lot of time

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because we're at this really powerful conference

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and she's going up and she's actually getting prayer

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and breakthrough at the altar.

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But yet literally we left the conference

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and one of the first things she said in the car was negative.

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I thought, man, how is that?

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Like we just went to the same conference.

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That is not where I'm at at all.

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And that's fine, I'm not judging her.

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That's stuff God's got to work out in her.

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But the reason I'm bringing it up is that

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she drove here to Fort Myers

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from another city with someone else

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and they were in the car for two and a half hours

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on the way home and the whole car ride home,

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that same person was negative the whole time.

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And so it was a really hard struggle for the other lady

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that was with her.

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And now she's at a place where she's like,

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I feel like I need to now create separation

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from this person because she left that car ride

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feeling depleted and empty

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and really kind of bummed out after a weekend

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that was really powerful for her.

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That woman, the other woman that was not the negative,

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she got massive breakthrough, 100%

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and very positive person.

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And y'all, we don't always all have to be positive.

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I don't want you to think that's what I'm saying.

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But what I want you to hear is that it's important

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for us to look at,

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you know, what is informing our statements, our thoughts,

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you know, what we're thinking about.

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If you're at something like that

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where you're at a conference,

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oh, look at Katie, you're from Naples.

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Yeah, we're in Fort Myers.

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But if you go to something like that where it's positive

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and you're walking out and the first thing

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that you're partnering with is negativity,

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I really wanna encourage you to look at that.

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Not just look at it, be like, Lord,

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please help me know what's informing this negativity in me.

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Where is this coming from?

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Because we don't wanna be the kind of people, ladies,

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that other people don't wanna be around.

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Okay?

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All right?

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All right, I'm gonna keep going.

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Proverbs 4.23 says this in the ESV version,

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keep your heart with all vigilance

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for from it flows the springs of life.

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Vigilance here is the quality or state of being vigilant.

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Vigilant means alertly watchful to avoid danger.

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Jackie talks in the heart workbook

447
00:29:21.780 --> 00:29:25.340
about how so often we have passwords

448
00:29:25.340 --> 00:29:26.700
for all these different things,

449
00:29:26.700 --> 00:29:29.540
but so often we don't have anything guarding our heart.

450
00:29:30.380 --> 00:29:32.660
We're allowing everything to come right on in

451
00:29:32.660 --> 00:29:34.260
and we're, you know, just,

452
00:29:34.260 --> 00:29:35.860
and again, there's no shame in this,

453
00:29:35.860 --> 00:29:39.740
but so many times we're not even thinking about,

454
00:29:39.740 --> 00:29:42.100
oh my gosh, I just let that right into my heart.

455
00:29:44.140 --> 00:29:47.140
But the Lord tonight is trying to, like,

456
00:29:47.140 --> 00:29:49.260
bring some things to your attention.

457
00:29:49.260 --> 00:29:51.120
You know, be thinking about,

458
00:29:51.120 --> 00:29:53.300
somebody wrote this in the chat this afternoon

459
00:29:53.300 --> 00:29:55.980
and I wrote it down and I didn't wanna forget to say it

460
00:29:55.980 --> 00:29:57.140
because it really stood out to me

461
00:29:57.140 --> 00:29:59.300
and I didn't have the time to go back

462
00:29:59.300 --> 00:30:00.500
and mention it during.

463
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:05.840
our live session this afternoon, but she wrote the fear of perpetuating generational trauma

464
00:30:07.200 --> 00:30:12.640
and then the shame around that. And so I want you to be thinking also about like,

465
00:30:13.360 --> 00:30:19.040
what are the fears that you've inherited? What are the anxious thoughts that you've inherited?

466
00:30:19.040 --> 00:30:24.880
What do I mean by that? Well, what I mean is that your parents said it, or your grandparents said it,

467
00:30:24.880 --> 00:30:31.040
or your sister said it, or your friends said it. It wasn't actually something you believed,

468
00:30:31.040 --> 00:30:38.160
but because you heard it multiple times, you inherited that. Okay? Because at some

469
00:30:38.160 --> 00:30:41.680
point you did start to partner with it, whether you meant to or not.

470
00:30:43.280 --> 00:30:47.840
Fear is false evidence appearing real. Yes, I'll read that again.

471
00:30:48.080 --> 00:30:53.360
She just wrote down, this was her own thought. It was a fear of perpetuating generational trauma.

472
00:30:53.360 --> 00:30:58.000
So she had shame around that. So I think maybe are you wanting me to say

473
00:31:00.480 --> 00:31:08.240
sometimes we have inherited fears, inherited anxiety. So those are things that we are getting

474
00:31:08.240 --> 00:31:13.280
from other people. We've inherited, just like, you know, if you have an inherited fear,

475
00:31:13.840 --> 00:31:18.960
from other people, we've inherited, just like, you know, if you have an inheritance, that's money

476
00:31:19.840 --> 00:31:24.400
and that gets passed down through generations, potentially, we can also inherit

477
00:31:25.920 --> 00:31:31.760
their junk, the negative thinking, the mindsets and heart postures that are not healthy.

478
00:31:32.320 --> 00:31:37.360
You know, just like we can inherit sometimes physical things that we can battle and war

479
00:31:37.360 --> 00:31:44.000
against. So if we can battle and war against physical things to not fall in the same footsteps,

480
00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:48.160
as well as, you know, the church talks a lot about generational curses, y'all,

481
00:31:48.160 --> 00:31:52.720
there's generational blessings too. There's a lot of people that get so hung up on the curses. Well,

482
00:31:52.720 --> 00:31:58.320
let's, let's let go. Let's, okay, address that, but let's step into generational blessings.

483
00:31:58.320 --> 00:32:03.360
Well, how do we do that? Well, we live in the blessing. We heal and we stop partnering with

484
00:32:03.360 --> 00:32:08.720
the things that are family, that unhealthy things that were not good. And we start partnering with

485
00:32:08.720 --> 00:32:13.760
the good things, the good, good that God is offering us because he's the one we want to

486
00:32:13.760 --> 00:32:20.720
inherit from. So we want to keep moving into that fear is false evidence appearing real.

487
00:32:24.480 --> 00:32:30.240
So, uh, Lynn, is it Linea? Linea? I don't know if I'm saying that right. I'm so sorry if I'm not,

488
00:32:30.320 --> 00:32:33.840
if you can do the pronunciation in the chat for me, that always helps me. She just put,

489
00:32:33.840 --> 00:32:39.360
I do have fear of passing trauma to my sons. I think we all do to some degree have that concern,

490
00:32:39.360 --> 00:32:46.480
but what I want you all to be careful about is not becoming afraid about it. Okay. You can't

491
00:32:46.480 --> 00:32:52.320
change what you already did. Okay. You can't, unfortunately, that's all done. I can't change

492
00:32:52.320 --> 00:32:59.040
any of my past either, but by the grace of God, God is, he's so good at redeeming the timeline.

493
00:32:59.760 --> 00:33:06.480
We just cast that care on him and put that on our Jesus cares board. And just Lord, you know,

494
00:33:06.480 --> 00:33:13.200
Lord, please bless my, my sons, help them overcome and step into generational blessings. Just like

495
00:33:13.200 --> 00:33:20.080
I'm talking to you all about. If I can do it, if I can break that stuff in my family line and step

496
00:33:20.080 --> 00:33:26.640
into the blessing that God has for me and get connected to my, my true inheritance. So can

497
00:33:26.720 --> 00:33:31.520
your children and your sons and your daughters and all the things. Okay. So I know that can be

498
00:33:31.520 --> 00:33:38.880
tough, but God's blood can cover all of that. Okay. All of our past and our mistakes,

499
00:33:38.880 --> 00:33:43.680
just like it can cover it for us. It can cover it for other people. All right. So the reason I

500
00:33:43.680 --> 00:33:48.240
brought out, brought up the fear is false evidence appearing real. I want you to be thinking about

501
00:33:48.240 --> 00:33:53.760
all the things you put in the chat and how the enemy is trying to cause you to think something

502
00:33:53.760 --> 00:34:03.920
is real. That's not okay. Fear is false evidence appearing real anxiety is fueled by fear.

503
00:34:05.040 --> 00:34:10.239
So oftentimes fear and anxiety partner together. Okay. Everyone understand

504
00:34:13.440 --> 00:34:18.159
anxiety is also a bunch of, what if this, what, if that, what, if this, what, if they say this,

505
00:34:18.159 --> 00:34:22.639
what, if I do this, what, if, you know, what, if I miss this thing, you know,

506
00:34:24.159 --> 00:34:27.280
all those kinds of thoughts, that's all anxiety thoughts,

507
00:34:30.320 --> 00:34:34.960
trauma that happened to us, isn't what stops us from living an amazing life ladies,

508
00:34:34.960 --> 00:34:42.639
but it's the lies we believe as a result of the trauma, the lies inform the fear and the anxiety.

509
00:34:42.800 --> 00:34:50.000
So most of the time, when you are asking the Lord to reveal things for healing on some level,

510
00:34:51.280 --> 00:34:56.320
there's probably going to be fear and anxiety underneath of that somewhere. There's going to

511
00:34:56.320 --> 00:35:06.960
be other stuff too. But fear and anxiety, fear and anxiety, fear and anxiety, fear and anxiety,

512
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:03.000
but there's a lot of times gonna be fear and anxiety

513
00:35:03.000 --> 00:35:05.060
in their hidden somewhere.

514
00:35:05.060 --> 00:35:08.060
So when we get to the root of the lie,

515
00:35:08.060 --> 00:35:10.800
like, okay, where did this lie originate?

516
00:35:10.800 --> 00:35:13.860
When's the first time I believed the lie

517
00:35:13.860 --> 00:35:17.320
that I didn't belong?

518
00:35:17.320 --> 00:35:19.480
That was one that came up this afternoon.

519
00:35:21.460 --> 00:35:23.080
And I thought it was really important

520
00:35:23.080 --> 00:35:25.860
because if we believe we don't belong,

521
00:35:25.860 --> 00:35:28.120
well, then we show up differently, don't we?

522
00:35:31.000 --> 00:35:36.000
So do you believe that you are a bride already?

523
00:35:37.760 --> 00:35:40.620
If not, I wanna encourage you to ask the Lord

524
00:35:40.620 --> 00:35:42.020
why you don't believe that.

525
00:35:43.200 --> 00:35:44.960
Is it fear?

526
00:35:44.960 --> 00:35:46.940
Is it things that are not true

527
00:35:46.940 --> 00:35:49.000
informing your thoughts that are telling you

528
00:35:49.000 --> 00:35:51.280
you're never gonna have that?

529
00:35:51.280 --> 00:35:53.160
Or is it faith?

530
00:35:53.160 --> 00:35:57.340
Helping you see that before you become an official bride,

531
00:35:57.340 --> 00:36:00.580
you're in preparation as a bride, just like Esther.

532
00:36:00.580 --> 00:36:05.460
Y'all, she was already on the path to become a bride

533
00:36:05.460 --> 00:36:07.680
before she became the official bride.

534
00:36:09.420 --> 00:36:11.740
Her destiny was fixed.

535
00:36:13.300 --> 00:36:18.300
So trust, trust and believe that yours is as well.

536
00:36:19.300 --> 00:36:20.680
But we're preparing.

537
00:36:20.680 --> 00:36:24.820
You're getting all the beautiful things put on yourself,

538
00:36:24.860 --> 00:36:28.740
the beautiful garments and jewelry and perfumes.

539
00:36:28.740 --> 00:36:30.340
That's what I want you to think of the heart work.

540
00:36:30.340 --> 00:36:31.980
It doesn't always feel like that,

541
00:36:31.980 --> 00:36:34.740
but that's what's happening in the spirit realm.

542
00:36:34.740 --> 00:36:37.460
God is cleansing you from the inside out

543
00:36:37.460 --> 00:36:39.020
and he's preparing you.

544
00:36:39.020 --> 00:36:41.020
All right, think of your problem areas.

545
00:36:41.020 --> 00:36:44.040
Where do you feel stuck the most?

546
00:36:44.040 --> 00:36:45.660
When you think of those areas,

547
00:36:45.660 --> 00:36:49.600
those are signaling to you areas that you believe a lie.

548
00:36:51.300 --> 00:36:53.300
So if you're feeling stuck in your life

549
00:36:53.300 --> 00:36:54.740
in some area right now,

550
00:36:54.740 --> 00:36:57.420
that is a signal to you that you're believing lies

551
00:36:57.420 --> 00:36:58.500
in that area.

552
00:36:58.500 --> 00:37:00.500
Okay, I'm gonna read something to you really quick

553
00:37:00.500 --> 00:37:01.940
from the heart work book.

554
00:37:01.940 --> 00:37:02.780
I'm not gonna read a lot,

555
00:37:02.780 --> 00:37:05.060
but I just wanna read this little piece.

556
00:37:05.060 --> 00:37:07.100
The biggest lie you might believe in life

557
00:37:07.100 --> 00:37:09.740
is that your life is normal.

558
00:37:09.740 --> 00:37:11.420
Many people that live broken lives

559
00:37:11.420 --> 00:37:13.540
believe that it's reasonable to live that way.

560
00:37:13.540 --> 00:37:17.260
They have inherited, remember I was just talking about,

561
00:37:17.260 --> 00:37:20.660
that emotional debt or trauma from their family.

562
00:37:20.660 --> 00:37:22.620
And they think it's normal to be overweight

563
00:37:22.940 --> 00:37:24.220
and unhappy, to be unfaithful,

564
00:37:24.220 --> 00:37:26.980
to be in a relationship where someone mistreats you

565
00:37:26.980 --> 00:37:28.540
or to be sick all the time.

566
00:37:28.540 --> 00:37:31.580
They think it's okay to have massive amounts of debt

567
00:37:31.580 --> 00:37:33.840
and spend all their energy trying to figure out

568
00:37:33.840 --> 00:37:38.300
how to pay the bills or even more severe deception

569
00:37:38.300 --> 00:37:43.300
like it's normal to abuse and hurt others or yourselves.

570
00:37:43.700 --> 00:37:44.820
I knew someone like that.

571
00:37:44.820 --> 00:37:47.680
They thought it was normal to be molested by family members

572
00:37:47.680 --> 00:37:50.820
because it's all they had ever known.

573
00:37:50.820 --> 00:37:52.580
When they were confronted by an outsider

574
00:37:53.420 --> 00:37:54.740
about the abuse, they said that happens

575
00:37:54.740 --> 00:37:56.940
in everyone's family, doesn't it?

576
00:37:56.940 --> 00:37:58.980
No, it does not.

577
00:37:58.980 --> 00:38:01.500
Maybe you have been confronted by people in your life,

578
00:38:01.500 --> 00:38:03.240
friends, coworkers, or even family

579
00:38:03.240 --> 00:38:05.340
that are trying to get you to see

580
00:38:05.340 --> 00:38:08.560
how dysfunctional an area of your life has become.

581
00:38:09.900 --> 00:38:11.540
I've done this for people for many years.

582
00:38:11.540 --> 00:38:12.980
Some call it an intervention.

583
00:38:12.980 --> 00:38:14.860
It's a reality check though,

584
00:38:14.860 --> 00:38:17.260
when someone is so deep in a lie

585
00:38:17.260 --> 00:38:19.500
that their behavior has become dangerous

586
00:38:19.500 --> 00:38:21.980
to others or themselves.

587
00:38:21.980 --> 00:38:26.220
The desire is that the person will wake up

588
00:38:26.220 --> 00:38:29.180
and see what they are doing and ask for help.

589
00:38:29.180 --> 00:38:32.200
We were talking about waking up a little while ago.

590
00:38:32.200 --> 00:38:35.280
So I wanna encourage you all to really be praying

591
00:38:35.280 --> 00:38:37.440
and asking the Lord to help you wake up

592
00:38:37.440 --> 00:38:39.340
in every area that you need it

593
00:38:39.340 --> 00:38:42.660
and to see the blind spots and filters.

594
00:38:45.700 --> 00:38:47.740
Most times blind spots and filters

595
00:38:47.740 --> 00:38:49.660
are what are keeping people from living

596
00:38:49.660 --> 00:38:52.400
an abundant, full life.

597
00:38:53.420 --> 00:38:54.560
I'm gonna keep going.

598
00:38:55.980 --> 00:38:58.820
As you're processing the things that are coming up,

599
00:38:58.820 --> 00:39:01.720
you're thinking about these fears and these anxieties,

600
00:39:01.720 --> 00:39:03.640
not only tonight, but in the days to come,

601
00:39:03.640 --> 00:39:06.900
I want you to pause and ask yourself two things.

602
00:39:06.900 --> 00:39:09.420
You're asking God to give you help with this too, okay?

603
00:39:09.420 --> 00:39:10.900
So this isn't something you're trying

604
00:39:10.900 --> 00:39:12.500
to figure out on your own.

605
00:39:12.500 --> 00:39:16.220
What are the facts and what is true?

606
00:39:18.540 --> 00:39:21.580
Not what are your emotions telling you?

607
00:39:21.580 --> 00:39:23.440
We feel the feels so God can heal the feels,

608
00:39:23.440 --> 00:39:26.460
but we don't let the feelings into the driver's seat.

609
00:39:28.020 --> 00:39:29.100
Okay?

610
00:39:29.100 --> 00:39:32.660
So if your feelings are always informing you,

611
00:39:32.660 --> 00:39:36.100
a lot of times you're gonna probably be someone

612
00:39:36.100 --> 00:39:38.980
that goes kind of running with, unfortunately,

613
00:39:38.980 --> 00:39:42.280
the enemy down the road of anxiety living, okay?

614
00:39:43.500 --> 00:39:45.980
Anxious thoughts, panic, worry.

615
00:39:45.980 --> 00:39:47.540
We're gonna talk about a couple of different aspects

616
00:39:47.540 --> 00:39:49.660
of this, I'm gonna keep going.

617
00:39:49.660 --> 00:39:52.260
We can overcome fears the more we heal

618
00:39:52.260 --> 00:39:55.260
and become more rooted in God's love and faithfulness to us.

619
00:39:55.260 --> 00:39:58.580
So I want you to understand becoming rooted

620
00:39:58.580 --> 00:40:00.380
and grounded in the love of God.

621
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:06.640
God, who you are in Christ, the identity that you have in Him is one of the most important

622
00:40:06.640 --> 00:40:08.320
things that you all can do.

623
00:40:08.320 --> 00:40:15.160
That's why we truly, in a good way, hit hard in this heart work, the beginning of our program

624
00:40:15.160 --> 00:40:20.760
about you being in relationship with the Lord and understanding how much He loves you and

625
00:40:20.760 --> 00:40:24.960
how that love relationship can transform everything else.

626
00:40:24.960 --> 00:40:29.160
We have some people that really try to fly through this part of the course in our program

627
00:40:29.160 --> 00:40:34.680
and they think they're going to get to the guy faster and you all typically, those people

628
00:40:34.680 --> 00:40:36.120
struggle.

629
00:40:36.120 --> 00:40:42.760
They do because they've missed the main thing and they often don't see the areas where they

630
00:40:42.760 --> 00:40:46.920
still need healing and that's something that's tripping them up.

631
00:40:46.920 --> 00:40:51.920
The other thing I want you to remember tonight is that God is faithful to you.

632
00:40:51.920 --> 00:40:53.360
God is faithful to you.

633
00:40:53.360 --> 00:40:58.200
He has been before, even if you haven't recognized it, but he's going to be faithful to you again

634
00:40:58.200 --> 00:41:00.960
as well.

635
00:41:00.960 --> 00:41:04.200
I want you to be thinking now, I'm going to start to shift and give you some examples

636
00:41:04.200 --> 00:41:08.280
of how fear can show up in our lives.

637
00:41:08.280 --> 00:41:11.200
Are you someone who's always waiting for the other shoe to drop?

638
00:41:11.200 --> 00:41:16.280
Like even when something is going really amazing, but deep down you're like, oh my gosh, this

639
00:41:16.280 --> 00:41:20.920
is never going to last or when is this, when is this, you know, let's just use a guy, for

640
00:41:20.920 --> 00:41:25.240
example, you have something good going on and you're just like, when is this going to

641
00:41:25.240 --> 00:41:30.720
because in the past things have ended before and they didn't end well.

642
00:41:30.720 --> 00:41:36.680
So now that's kind of the broken record that you believe is it's never going to last.

643
00:41:36.680 --> 00:41:42.960
Courtney, I see you, I'll come to you in just a sec, okay?

644
00:41:42.960 --> 00:41:51.300
Do you tend to think of the worst case scenario instead of the best case scenario?

645
00:41:51.300 --> 00:42:00.460
Are you someone that you see the glass half, half empty typically versus half full?

646
00:42:00.460 --> 00:42:05.180
Do you hear a siren and think something happened to someone, oh, that's fine.

647
00:42:05.180 --> 00:42:14.980
Do you, do you hear a siren and think something happened to someone that you love?

648
00:42:14.980 --> 00:42:15.980
I've had that happen.

649
00:42:15.980 --> 00:42:20.860
I don't know if you all have ever had that happen where, you know, your kids are out

650
00:42:20.860 --> 00:42:25.980
and you hear a siren and you're just panicked that something happened to them.

651
00:42:25.980 --> 00:42:31.740
I will tell you that the more trauma you've had in your life that are connected to accidents,

652
00:42:31.740 --> 00:42:35.180
you might be someone that struggles more with that.

653
00:42:35.180 --> 00:42:39.780
Growing up, my mom, I was in fourth grade, my mom and my brother and sister were hit

654
00:42:39.780 --> 00:42:42.120
by a drunk driver.

655
00:42:42.120 --> 00:42:44.580
So that was a massive trauma in my life.

656
00:42:44.580 --> 00:42:49.820
I didn't hear the sirens, but because of all that they went through with that situation,

657
00:42:49.820 --> 00:42:52.900
my brother was in a coma for a very long time.

658
00:42:52.900 --> 00:42:54.140
My sister had to have brain surgery.

659
00:42:54.140 --> 00:42:56.540
It was a very traumatic event.

660
00:42:56.540 --> 00:43:02.820
I mean, I was left, you know, with my grandparents, not alone, but left with other people a lot

661
00:43:02.820 --> 00:43:08.100
because my mom had to travel to other towns to be, go to the rehab with my brother after

662
00:43:08.100 --> 00:43:10.300
he did come out of the coma.

663
00:43:10.300 --> 00:43:15.200
But then even after that, literal, like the enemy is trying to come after my family with

664
00:43:15.200 --> 00:43:16.200
these accidents.

665
00:43:16.200 --> 00:43:19.700
My oldest brother, Brian was in another accident.

666
00:43:19.700 --> 00:43:25.360
My younger brother of the two was in two accidents, lots of accidents.

667
00:43:25.360 --> 00:43:30.900
And then when I was dating the girl's dad, they literally, he was probably in three different

668
00:43:30.900 --> 00:43:37.980
accidents and Michaela, the older of the two was in two of those accidents with him.

669
00:43:37.980 --> 00:43:41.180
Kind of interesting, don't you think?

670
00:43:41.180 --> 00:43:44.840
So it's something that when I was going through the heartwork, I really was like, Oh my gosh,

671
00:43:44.840 --> 00:43:46.060
that does happen to me.

672
00:43:46.060 --> 00:43:52.100
Like I can remember just feeling panic, like, you know, when sirens would go off and there

673
00:43:52.100 --> 00:43:56.720
would be, you know, cause all this stuff had happened when I was younger and then even

674
00:43:56.720 --> 00:43:58.400
as an adult.

675
00:43:58.400 --> 00:44:01.860
And so I don't know if that's resonating for anyone tonight, but I just felt led to share

676
00:44:01.860 --> 00:44:02.860
it.

677
00:44:02.860 --> 00:44:08.180
So if that's you, the enemy is trying to get you to partner with fear and anxiety through

678
00:44:08.180 --> 00:44:12.480
those traumas that you've been through, but you can overcome it.

679
00:44:12.480 --> 00:44:15.620
I don't feel like that hardly ever anymore.

680
00:44:15.620 --> 00:44:20.660
I'm not saying it never happens, but when it does, I just really try to be conscious

681
00:44:20.660 --> 00:44:23.300
and dismiss that very quickly.

682
00:44:23.300 --> 00:44:24.980
But you can overcome it.

683
00:44:24.980 --> 00:44:26.120
I'm going to keep going.

684
00:44:26.120 --> 00:44:31.540
Someone doesn't respond to your text in the timeframe that you think they should.

685
00:44:31.540 --> 00:44:34.740
And you start thinking things like, they're mad at me.

686
00:44:34.740 --> 00:44:36.460
They don't care about me.

687
00:44:36.460 --> 00:44:38.520
I'm not a priority.

688
00:44:38.520 --> 00:44:39.900
They must be talking to someone else.

689
00:44:39.900 --> 00:44:43.420
If it's a romantic person, you know, people tend to fear that kind of stuff.

690
00:44:43.420 --> 00:44:44.420
I'm not pretty enough.

691
00:44:44.420 --> 00:44:46.160
I'm not good enough.

692
00:44:46.160 --> 00:44:48.460
You know, are they just ignoring me?

693
00:44:48.460 --> 00:44:52.420
You know, and the reality is, you know, our culture with our cell phones has made it way

694
00:44:52.420 --> 00:44:55.340
worse, but people actually have lives.

695
00:44:55.340 --> 00:44:56.820
You all.

696
00:44:56.820 --> 00:44:57.820
Okay.

697
00:44:57.820 --> 00:44:58.980
We do.

698
00:44:58.980 --> 00:44:59.980
We all have lives.

699
00:44:59.980 --> 00:45:00.980
We all have lives.

700
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:09.000
And when we're busy, I think the problem is that we're constantly responding to everybody right away because we're not actually living our life.

701
00:45:00.980 --> 00:45:01.980
We all have lives.

702
00:45:01.980 --> 00:45:01.980


703
00:45:10.000 --> 00:45:13.000
Ouch. It's true though, right?

704
00:45:14.000 --> 00:45:22.000
When I was in unhealthy relationships, it felt good to get text messages in the beginning all the time, and I didn't know any better.

705
00:45:23.000 --> 00:45:31.000
And I just let him text me all the time. Let him text me. Well, guess what? That built a really unhealthy connection right from the beginning. I had no boundaries.

706
00:45:32.000 --> 00:45:39.000
And so even when there was constantly drama, I'd be at work and the girl's dad, I mean, it was just constant.

707
00:45:40.000 --> 00:45:46.000
I don't know that the man's ever lived a day in his life without drama. And I'm not saying that to be mean to him. It's true, though.

708
00:45:47.000 --> 00:45:53.000
Every day was drama. Something was happening every day. And I just felt like my life was ruled by that.

709
00:45:54.000 --> 00:46:03.000
Well, guess what? I didn't cause that, but I enabled that. And that whole thing got created because I didn't set boundaries.

710
00:46:04.000 --> 00:46:15.000
I didn't need to hear from him 24-7, and he didn't need to hear from me 24-7. I had a job. I had a really good job. Thank God I didn't ruin it.

711
00:46:16.000 --> 00:46:26.000
I had friends and people that I loved to hang out with, but I allowed my whole life to get totally absorbed by him and his girls. It's not good.

712
00:46:27.000 --> 00:46:36.000
Why did I do that? At the core, I was afraid that he wouldn't like me, and I wanted him to choose me.

713
00:46:37.000 --> 00:46:40.000
And so I was just trying to be like all in. I'm all in.

714
00:46:41.000 --> 00:46:45.000
So I want y'all to be thinking about some of these things. Are you even doing that with some of your friends?

715
00:46:46.000 --> 00:46:52.000
Do you have friends that actually, if you don't respond to them within a certain time, they're upset with you, like you're not a good friend?

716
00:46:53.000 --> 00:47:04.000
When you've just worked all day, you just have had nonstop stuff all day, and yet you're feeling guilty because your friend's mad at you? Why are they mad?

717
00:47:04.000 --> 00:47:13.000
Y'all, those aren't healthy dynamics, okay? So I want you to see that fear plays a role in these things and anxiety.

718
00:47:14.000 --> 00:47:19.000
And again, those are rooted in trauma from the past and things that we haven't healed from.

719
00:47:20.000 --> 00:47:28.000
The reason I didn't set healthy boundaries in that relationship is because I didn't learn how to set healthy boundaries as a kid. Nobody taught me.

720
00:47:29.000 --> 00:47:44.000
And so as an adult, I didn't learn for a long time until I started like, oh, wait a minute, learning from other people, reading books about it, watching what healthy people do, learning from this program.

721
00:47:45.000 --> 00:47:52.000
Y'all, I'm telling you, if you'll listen to the guidance in here and apply it, it'll change your life. You'll be more free than ever.

722
00:47:52.000 --> 00:48:02.000
I am really intentional to respond to people, but y'all, I do take days off where I just like, yeah, I'm just not going to worry about getting back to that person today.

723
00:48:03.000 --> 00:48:11.000
And it's typically on Sundays. We do service. We're tired. We like to take a nap. We call them Sunday siestas.

724
00:48:11.000 --> 00:48:23.000
And I don't have to feel worried about anybody else but us, Brian and I, and that's it. And I'm not worried about us. We all know what I'm saying. Okay. All right.

725
00:48:24.000 --> 00:48:29.000
So I think this is important to talk about tonight. Some of y'all need to hear this stuff. Okay.

726
00:48:30.000 --> 00:48:45.000
So what are your thoughts rooted in? Are your thoughts rooted in fear, doubt, unbelief, pain, or wounds? Are they rooted in joy and peace, love, kindness, goodness, faithfulness?

727
00:48:46.000 --> 00:48:50.000
Do you believe the best or do you believe the worst? Again, going back to that scenario.

728
00:48:50.000 --> 00:49:04.000
1 John 4, 18 says this, there's no fear in love. Dread does not exist, but perfect love that is complete. It's full grown drives out fear because fear involves the expectation of divine punishment.

729
00:49:05.000 --> 00:49:18.000
Some versions say it involves torment. So the one who is afraid of God's judgment is not perfected in love, which means has not grown into a sufficient understanding of God's love.

730
00:49:18.000 --> 00:49:33.000
So I want you to be thinking about what I'm saying right now. The scripture is saying that if we live in fear, it actually is showing us that we are not mature in love.

731
00:49:34.000 --> 00:49:45.000
We're not full grown in the understanding of God's love for us. There's no shame. I'm not saying that. So if you're feeling shame or condemnation or guilt, please don't receive that. That's from the enemy.

732
00:49:45.000 --> 00:50:00.000
But I'm bringing this to the light because we can ask the Lord every day, God, help me to grow more rooted and grounded in your love for me. Help me to become more secure in my identity in Christ so that I know who you are in me.

733
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.000
God, help me to know who you are as joy.

734
00:50:02.000 --> 00:50:04.000
Help me to know who you are as peace.

735
00:50:04.000 --> 00:50:06.000
You know, he has all these characteristics

736
00:50:06.000 --> 00:50:09.000
and we should desire and long to know him

737
00:50:09.000 --> 00:50:11.000
in those characteristics more.

738
00:50:11.000 --> 00:50:13.000
And that is going to help us heal

739
00:50:13.000 --> 00:50:15.000
in our understanding of who God is

740
00:50:15.000 --> 00:50:16.000
and the way we look at him.

741
00:50:16.000 --> 00:50:18.000
And when we understand who God is

742
00:50:18.000 --> 00:50:22.000
and we have a really informed,

743
00:50:22.000 --> 00:50:25.000
true vision of how that then means

744
00:50:25.000 --> 00:50:27.000
how he treats us,

745
00:50:28.000 --> 00:50:30.000
it changes so much.

746
00:50:32.000 --> 00:50:34.000
This afternoon, the Lord gave me a little vision

747
00:50:34.000 --> 00:50:36.000
of a little girl.

748
00:50:37.000 --> 00:50:38.000
She was shorter.

749
00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:39.000
She had blonde hair.

750
00:50:39.000 --> 00:50:40.000
And she was just...

751
00:50:40.000 --> 00:50:42.000
I was talking to Lori

752
00:50:42.000 --> 00:50:44.000
and it came up when I was talking to her,

753
00:50:44.000 --> 00:50:47.000
but she was tugging on her daddy's shirt.

754
00:50:47.000 --> 00:50:50.000
That was the vision that came up.

755
00:50:51.000 --> 00:50:53.000
And while I think it was actually, you know,

756
00:50:53.000 --> 00:50:55.000
sometimes we've done that as kids.

757
00:50:55.000 --> 00:50:57.000
We've tugged on our parents, you know,

758
00:50:57.000 --> 00:50:59.000
trying to get their attention

759
00:50:59.000 --> 00:51:01.000
because we had a need.

760
00:51:01.000 --> 00:51:03.000
And some of those things went unanswered, ladies,

761
00:51:03.000 --> 00:51:05.000
for some of you.

762
00:51:05.000 --> 00:51:06.000
But the word this afternoon was,

763
00:51:06.000 --> 00:51:09.000
God is going to respond.

764
00:51:10.000 --> 00:51:13.000
He feels you tugging on the hem of his garment

765
00:51:13.000 --> 00:51:16.000
and he's looking down at you and he's smiling.

766
00:51:18.000 --> 00:51:21.000
He's smiling and he's looking forward to blessing you.

767
00:51:21.000 --> 00:51:23.000
Some of you might not be there yet

768
00:51:23.000 --> 00:51:25.000
in the way that you perceive God,

769
00:51:25.000 --> 00:51:27.000
but I believe that you will get there.

770
00:51:27.000 --> 00:51:28.000
All right, one more scripture

771
00:51:28.000 --> 00:51:30.000
and then we're going to go into breakouts.

772
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:43.000
God loved you, Jeannie,

773
00:51:43.000 --> 00:51:46.000
so much that he gave his son, Jesus, for you.

774
00:51:48.000 --> 00:51:51.000
And for you, Kristen and Shadonna

775
00:51:51.000 --> 00:51:53.000
and every lady here, myself included.

776
00:51:55.000 --> 00:51:58.000
He loved each one of us, so he gave.

777
00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:01.000
Okay?

778
00:52:01.000 --> 00:52:04.000
Our father is a giver, not a taker.

779
00:52:06.000 --> 00:52:07.000
We're going to go into breakout session

780
00:52:07.000 --> 00:52:09.000
and I want you to talk to each other

781
00:52:09.000 --> 00:52:11.000
about the areas of fear

782
00:52:11.000 --> 00:52:13.000
that you are going to ask the Lord

783
00:52:13.000 --> 00:52:14.000
to come in and heal tonight.

784
00:52:14.000 --> 00:52:15.000
And it might be,

785
00:52:16.000 --> 00:52:17.000
it might be

786
00:52:20.000 --> 00:52:22.000
the same thing you put in the chat.

787
00:52:22.000 --> 00:52:24.000
It might be something different that came up

788
00:52:24.000 --> 00:52:26.000
after you've been listening for a while.

789
00:52:30.000 --> 00:52:32.000
Yeah, I can do that, Pat.

790
00:52:32.000 --> 00:52:35.000
So when you go into the breakouts, ladies,

791
00:52:35.000 --> 00:52:38.000
be sure that you all just wait in your room

792
00:52:38.000 --> 00:52:39.000
when I put you in there

793
00:52:39.000 --> 00:52:41.000
because I might have to move some people around.

794
00:52:41.000 --> 00:52:42.000
Sometimes people are at work,

795
00:52:42.000 --> 00:52:43.000
they can't come into the breakout.

796
00:52:43.000 --> 00:52:46.000
Sometimes there's a slow connection.

797
00:52:46.000 --> 00:52:49.000
And then also, if people are sharing,

798
00:52:49.000 --> 00:52:51.000
let's all stay in the room, okay?

799
00:52:51.000 --> 00:52:55.000
So that everybody feels heard, seen, and loved.

800
00:52:55.000 --> 00:52:56.000
Okay?

801
00:52:56.000 --> 00:52:58.000
So let's do our best to do that.

802
00:52:58.000 --> 00:53:00.000
And even if that thing pops up

803
00:53:00.000 --> 00:53:01.000
to come back to the room,

804
00:53:01.000 --> 00:53:03.000
if someone is talking in your room,

805
00:53:03.000 --> 00:53:04.000
just go ahead and stay

806
00:53:04.000 --> 00:53:06.000
until the thing brings you back, okay?

807
00:53:06.000 --> 00:53:08.000
And remember, you don't have to give advice.

808
00:53:08.000 --> 00:53:09.000
You don't have to counsel each other

809
00:53:09.000 --> 00:53:10.000
or coach each other.

810
00:53:10.000 --> 00:53:13.000
You get to hear each other's story,

811
00:53:13.000 --> 00:53:14.000
short, brief, and powerful.

812
00:53:14.000 --> 00:53:15.000
What does that mean, ladies?

813
00:53:15.000 --> 00:53:16.000
Be aware.

814
00:53:16.000 --> 00:53:18.000
I'm gonna give you about seven minutes.

815
00:53:18.000 --> 00:53:21.000
So if I have two or three of you in a room,

816
00:53:21.000 --> 00:53:22.000
two, four, six,

817
00:53:22.000 --> 00:53:25.000
you have about a little over two minutes, okay?

818
00:53:25.000 --> 00:53:26.000
To share.

819
00:53:26.000 --> 00:53:27.000
So keep it short, brief, and powerful

820
00:53:27.000 --> 00:53:29.000
so that everybody has a turn.

821
00:53:29.000 --> 00:53:30.000
And then if you have extra time,

822
00:53:30.000 --> 00:53:33.000
you can get to know each other a little bit, all right?

823
00:53:33.000 --> 00:53:35.000
Let me get these set up for you.

824
00:53:35.000 --> 00:53:36.000
It's gonna be good.

825
00:53:36.000 --> 00:53:38.000
If you've never done a breakout room,

826
00:53:38.000 --> 00:53:39.000
some of you are,

827
00:53:39.000 --> 00:53:41.000
you're just gonna like really love it.

828
00:53:41.000 --> 00:53:44.000
So many of these ladies have become connected

829
00:53:44.000 --> 00:53:45.000
in really beautiful ways.

830
00:53:45.000 --> 00:53:48.000
It's very, very powerful what God does in this time.

831
00:53:48.000 --> 00:53:49.000
All right, ladies,

832
00:53:49.000 --> 00:53:51.000
go ahead and click to join those breakout rooms.

833
00:53:51.000 --> 00:53:53.000
That should pop up right now on your screen.

834
00:53:53.000 --> 00:53:54.000
If it's not there already,

835
00:53:54.000 --> 00:53:55.000
click to join that.

836
00:53:57.000 --> 00:53:58.000
All right, ladies,

837
00:53:58.000 --> 00:54:00.000
I'm gonna give you about five minutes.

838
00:54:00.000 --> 00:54:01.000
So if you have extra time,

839
00:54:01.000 --> 00:54:03.000
you can get to know each other a little bit,

840
00:54:03.000 --> 00:54:04.000
all right?

841
00:54:04.000 --> 00:54:05.000
If you have extra time,

842
00:54:05.000 --> 00:54:07.000
you can get to know each other a little bit,

843
00:54:07.000 --> 00:54:08.000
all right?

844
00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:09.000
If you have extra time,

845
00:54:09.000 --> 00:54:11.000
you can get to know each other a little bit,

846
00:54:11.000 --> 00:54:12.000
all right?

847
00:54:12.000 --> 00:54:13.000
All right, awesome.

848
00:54:13.000 --> 00:54:15.000
Getting ladies in there.

849
00:54:15.000 --> 00:54:17.000
I'll start to pray here in just a moment

850
00:54:17.000 --> 00:54:20.000
for those that are here watching the replay later on

851
00:54:20.000 --> 00:54:23.000
or staying in the Zoom room here.

852
00:54:23.000 --> 00:54:26.000
All right, I think I've got two ladies in every room,

853
00:54:26.000 --> 00:54:27.000
so that's great.

854
00:54:29.000 --> 00:54:30.000
Father, thank you so much

855
00:54:30.000 --> 00:54:32.000
for everything you're doing tonight.

856
00:54:32.000 --> 00:54:33.000
We thank you, God,

857
00:54:33.000 --> 00:54:35.000
for revealings for healing that are happening.

858
00:54:35.000 --> 00:54:38.000
God, we're asking for supernatural healing

859
00:54:38.000 --> 00:54:40.000
and breakthrough for revelation.

860
00:54:42.000 --> 00:54:45.000
I just got in my spirit, revelation fire.

861
00:54:45.000 --> 00:54:46.000
I don't know if I've ever heard of that,

862
00:54:46.000 --> 00:54:47.000
but I'm gonna speak that out

863
00:54:47.000 --> 00:54:48.000
because that's what I heard.

864
00:54:48.000 --> 00:54:49.000
So Lord, we thank you.

865
00:54:49.000 --> 00:54:51.000
And what it makes me think of, ladies,

866
00:54:51.000 --> 00:54:55.000
is the scripture that talks about his refining fire

867
00:54:55.000 --> 00:54:57.000
and how he burns up the chaff

868
00:54:57.000 --> 00:55:00.000
and he removes that with his winnowing fire.

869
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:05.040
And I'll have to look up where that scripture is at, but it is from the word of God.

870
00:55:05.040 --> 00:55:06.540
And it's really, really good.

871
00:55:06.540 --> 00:55:15.260
God wants to make us white as snow and remove all of the, the, the things that have weighed us down.

872
00:55:15.620 --> 00:55:17.320
So father, we just thank you right now.

873
00:55:17.320 --> 00:55:18.480
We just pray into that.

874
00:55:18.480 --> 00:55:21.480
We thank you God for refining us with your fire.

875
00:55:22.200 --> 00:55:28.680
Um, it makes me think of even a time years ago, I went on a field trip and there was, um, the

876
00:55:28.680 --> 00:55:35.840
glass blowers and they would, you know, put that glass into the fire to form it, not to harm it.

877
00:55:35.920 --> 00:55:36.420
Okay.

878
00:55:36.640 --> 00:55:37.960
So I think that's really important.

879
00:55:37.960 --> 00:55:44.000
So thank you God for the refining process that you're making us beautiful in your time.

880
00:55:44.000 --> 00:55:49.560
We thank you God that there is a new things coming to the forefront that all things have

881
00:55:49.560 --> 00:55:52.200
passed away and behold, everything has become new in you.

882
00:55:52.200 --> 00:55:57.040
We thank you God that we can lay aside every weight that's so easily ensnares us.

883
00:55:57.040 --> 00:56:00.360
And we can press on toward the high calling of God for our lives.

884
00:56:00.920 --> 00:56:07.800
God, we thank you that if there's any area where we're living underneath the blessed place of

885
00:56:07.800 --> 00:56:14.000
living that you want us to be underneath the, the good, good that you have for us, I pray that

886
00:56:14.000 --> 00:56:21.640
you'll help us to, yeah, just come out of alignment with any lies, any doubt, any unbelief that you

887
00:56:21.640 --> 00:56:25.560
would help us to step further into the fullness of who you originally created us to be that we

888
00:56:25.560 --> 00:56:33.120
would partner with your truth that we would yes, Lord, that we would receive fresh revelation

889
00:56:33.120 --> 00:56:37.680
from heaven, that we would speak that out over our lives, that we would declare it with

890
00:56:37.680 --> 00:56:41.000
boldness, with truth, with life.

891
00:56:41.520 --> 00:56:46.520
We thank you Lord that Ephesians 6, 12 says, for we are not fighting against flesh and

892
00:56:46.520 --> 00:56:51.080
blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world against mighty

893
00:56:51.080 --> 00:56:54.680
powers in this dark world and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.

894
00:56:55.120 --> 00:56:56.600
Why am I thanking God for that?

895
00:56:56.600 --> 00:57:00.880
Because he's telling us that this is something we're going to be up against, but he gives us the

896
00:57:00.880 --> 00:57:02.720
armor of God to protect us.

897
00:57:02.960 --> 00:57:08.080
If you've never really paid attention, if you keep reading in Ephesians there, we can declare

898
00:57:08.080 --> 00:57:13.040
literally every day over ourselves, the armor of God over our children, that we would put on the

899
00:57:13.040 --> 00:57:16.840
belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shoes of the readiness of the gospel of

900
00:57:16.840 --> 00:57:21.120
peace, the helmet of salvation, the shield of faith, and the sword of the spirit, which is the

901
00:57:21.120 --> 00:57:24.360
word of God, and that his glory is our rear guard.

902
00:57:25.200 --> 00:57:30.520
So Lord, we just thank you that you daily give us the opportunity to put on the armor, to

903
00:57:30.520 --> 00:57:37.240
walk clothed in your righteousness, to walk in your peace and your stillness, and to know

904
00:57:37.240 --> 00:57:43.720
that you are warring on our behalf, that we don't have to wrestle with these areas.

905
00:57:43.720 --> 00:57:45.080
We stand firm.

906
00:57:45.080 --> 00:57:46.440
We declare your word.

907
00:57:46.800 --> 00:57:52.560
We thank you that worship is our warfare, God, and even resting at times is our warfare.

908
00:57:52.600 --> 00:57:58.160
So Lord, we thank you that you would reveal to us the areas where we need to slow down and just

909
00:57:58.160 --> 00:57:59.880
center ourselves in you.

910
00:58:00.000 --> 00:58:05.480
The scripture, I think it's in Psalm 46, 10, be still and know that I'm God, might not have that

911
00:58:05.480 --> 00:58:08.360
accurate, but that comes to mind as well.

912
00:58:09.480 --> 00:58:15.080
Psalm 119, verse 165 in the Passion Translation says this, there is such a great peace and

913
00:58:15.080 --> 00:58:20.440
well-being that comes to the lovers of your word and they will never be offended.

914
00:58:21.560 --> 00:58:26.960
So, Lord, I pray that if there is any area in our hearts where we are easily offended, God, I

915
00:58:26.960 --> 00:58:32.080
pray that you would reveal those areas for healing, that we would be women with, yeah, hearts

916
00:58:32.080 --> 00:58:36.760
that are humble before you, Lord, that we would humble ourselves under your mighty hand,

917
00:58:36.760 --> 00:58:40.400
Father, and allow you to exalt us in due season.

918
00:58:41.120 --> 00:58:45.520
Yes, Lord, we thank you for joy unspeakable and full of glory being ours.

919
00:58:45.520 --> 00:58:50.880
We thank you, Lord, that in Exodus 20, verse 6, it says, I lavish unfailing love for a

920
00:58:50.880 --> 00:58:55.640
thousand generations on those who love me and obey my commands.

921
00:58:55.840 --> 00:59:01.120
Ladies, doesn't that sound like a good father, a good protector, a good provider?

922
00:59:01.120 --> 00:59:07.280
He's saying I lavish unfailing love for a thousand generations on those who love me and obey

923
00:59:07.280 --> 00:59:08.040
my commands.

924
00:59:08.040 --> 00:59:13.320
So, I feel like that partners with some of that generational blessing, a word that we were

925
00:59:13.320 --> 00:59:20.200
talking about earlier, and 2 Corinthians 10, 5 says, we take captive every thought to make it

926
00:59:20.200 --> 00:59:21.560
obedient to Christ.

927
00:59:21.800 --> 00:59:25.400
So, this is, again, where we're partnering with God in this journey, that we're taking every

928
00:59:25.400 --> 00:59:26.520
thought captive.

929
00:59:26.520 --> 00:59:31.960
And I think even last week I said I love to like pray that we would take it captive quickly and

930
00:59:31.960 --> 00:59:35.800
we would cast those down and believe rather what the word of God says.

931
00:59:35.800 --> 00:59:38.840
So, what does the word of God say about you, ladies?

932
00:59:38.840 --> 00:59:40.440
Do you know what it says?

933
00:59:40.440 --> 00:59:43.640
If not, I encourage you to look that up.

934
00:59:43.640 --> 00:59:45.400
Meditate in God's scripture.

935
00:59:45.400 --> 00:59:50.840
All you have to do, if you're not sure where to start, A, I really, really recommend the

936
00:59:50.840 --> 00:59:51.880
book of John.

937
00:59:51.880 --> 00:59:55.640
And then the other thing I was going to say is if you don't know where to start about

938
00:59:55.640 --> 01:00:00.280
declarations and truth over yourself, just type something in the chat box.

939
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:09.080
in and say scriptures for trusting God, scriptures about my identity in Christ, scriptures about

940
01:00:09.080 --> 01:00:11.240
the character of God.

941
01:00:11.240 --> 01:00:14.620
And there will be things that will come up and you can start to study those and pray.

942
01:00:14.620 --> 01:00:18.320
And even if you don't know what they mean when I say study them, like, you know, there's

943
01:00:18.320 --> 01:00:19.840
different ways you can study the Bible.

944
01:00:19.840 --> 01:00:24.320
But even if you don't know how to do any of that, just write that scripture out, memorize

945
01:00:24.320 --> 01:00:26.480
it, let that get into your spirit.

946
01:00:26.480 --> 01:00:31.240
There's a scripture in Psalms where it talks about that we would ask God to write his word

947
01:00:31.240 --> 01:00:34.000
upon the tablets of our hearts and our minds.

948
01:00:34.000 --> 01:00:38.360
Yeah, that it would be so close to us in our heart that we wouldn't forget it, that it

949
01:00:38.360 --> 01:00:43.000
would be what guides us in every day and every moment.

950
01:00:43.000 --> 01:00:47.720
Psalm 86, 17 in the Passion Translation says this, send me a miraculous sign to show me

951
01:00:47.720 --> 01:00:52.680
how much you love me, so that those who hate me will see it and be ashamed.

952
01:00:52.680 --> 01:00:57.840
Won't they know that you, Lord, are my comforter, the one who comes to help me.

953
01:00:57.840 --> 01:00:59.520
So good.

954
01:00:59.520 --> 01:01:00.840
The Lord is our comforter.

955
01:01:00.840 --> 01:01:03.140
He's the one that comes to help us.

956
01:01:03.140 --> 01:01:06.800
And that makes me also think about the scripture that talks about him preparing a table for

957
01:01:06.800 --> 01:01:09.400
us in the presence of our enemies.

958
01:01:09.400 --> 01:01:14.600
Luke 8, 17 through 19 in the Passion Translation says this, because this revelation lamp now

959
01:01:14.600 --> 01:01:17.600
shines within you, nothing will be hidden from you.

960
01:01:17.600 --> 01:01:19.640
It will all be revealed.

961
01:01:19.640 --> 01:01:24.040
Every secret of the kingdom will be unveiled and out in the open, made known by revelation

962
01:01:24.040 --> 01:01:25.040
light.

963
01:01:25.040 --> 01:01:28.040
So pay careful attention to your hearts as you hear my teaching.

964
01:01:28.040 --> 01:01:32.160
For to those who have open hearts, even more revelation will be given to them until it

965
01:01:32.160 --> 01:01:33.320
overflows.

966
01:01:33.320 --> 01:01:37.800
And for those who do not listen with open hearts, what little light they imagine to

967
01:01:37.800 --> 01:01:39.360
have will be taken away.

968
01:01:39.360 --> 01:01:43.360
So ladies, even as I was saying earlier tonight, we want to have teachable hearts, because

969
01:01:43.360 --> 01:01:44.360
guess what?

970
01:01:44.360 --> 01:01:48.040
It just said if we have open hearts, God's going to pour in more.

971
01:01:48.040 --> 01:01:49.520
So praise the Lord for more.

972
01:01:49.520 --> 01:01:50.520
Say double portion.

973
01:01:50.520 --> 01:01:52.960
We're going to receive double portion.

974
01:01:52.960 --> 01:01:53.960
It's ours.

975
01:01:53.960 --> 01:01:54.960
Hi, welcome back.

976
01:01:54.960 --> 01:02:01.480
We have like six seconds and everybody will be back with us.

977
01:02:01.480 --> 01:02:02.480
So good.

978
01:02:02.480 --> 01:02:07.360
One of my favorite things to do is to pray while y'all are in there and just declare

979
01:02:07.360 --> 01:02:10.520
truth and just bring anything up.

980
01:02:10.520 --> 01:02:11.520
Okay.

981
01:02:11.520 --> 01:02:12.520
Yeah.

982
01:02:12.520 --> 01:02:17.320
And I think, ladies, I want to mention that sometimes people hit the exit button accidentally.

983
01:02:17.320 --> 01:02:18.320
I've done that before.

984
01:02:18.320 --> 01:02:21.560
I don't know if anybody else has done that when you've been in a zoom room and you mean

985
01:02:21.560 --> 01:02:24.960
to hit stay and you hit exit.

986
01:02:24.960 --> 01:02:28.160
So just, you know, again, ladies try to believe the best in each other.

987
01:02:28.160 --> 01:02:29.160
Okay.

988
01:02:29.160 --> 01:02:32.720
Even if somebody leaves a room, it, that might've been what happened, or maybe they had to leave

989
01:02:32.720 --> 01:02:34.480
because they had to go take their kids somewhere.

990
01:02:34.480 --> 01:02:35.480
You just never know.

991
01:02:35.480 --> 01:02:36.480
Okay.

992
01:02:36.480 --> 01:02:38.080
You just never, never know.

993
01:02:38.080 --> 01:02:39.080
All right.

994
01:02:39.080 --> 01:02:40.360
So Joy's ready to go.

995
01:02:40.360 --> 01:02:41.360
She's in the seat.

996
01:02:41.360 --> 01:02:42.360
Go ahead.

997
01:02:42.360 --> 01:02:43.360
Joy.

998
01:02:44.360 --> 01:02:52.360
I faced my fear to raise my hand, but I did anyway.

999
01:02:52.360 --> 01:02:54.360
All right.

1000
01:02:54.360 --> 01:02:57.080
So I was in the breakout room.

1001
01:02:57.080 --> 01:03:01.640
I did not finish as that's what I faced first.

1002
01:03:01.640 --> 01:03:03.240
I'm the first one to raise my hand.

1003
01:03:03.240 --> 01:03:04.240
That's all right.

1004
01:03:04.240 --> 01:03:05.240
Go ahead.

1005
01:03:05.240 --> 01:03:06.240
Okay.

1006
01:03:06.240 --> 01:03:11.440
So I was mentioned about, I was dealing with this even today.

1007
01:03:11.520 --> 01:03:21.720
I was dealing with my kind of concern or fear about my current situation, my finance situation.

1008
01:03:21.720 --> 01:03:27.480
Because I did take a risk at the beginning of this year, I decided God, I told God, I

1009
01:03:27.480 --> 01:03:28.480
want to rest.

1010
01:03:28.480 --> 01:03:30.400
This is my year to bleed.

1011
01:03:30.400 --> 01:03:32.120
So I did not look for a job.

1012
01:03:32.120 --> 01:03:33.920
I said, I need a rest.

1013
01:03:33.920 --> 01:03:34.920
I need a break.

1014
01:03:34.920 --> 01:03:37.960
I need to receive healing, continue seeking him.

1015
01:03:37.960 --> 01:03:44.480
I need a time, not like before, so busy, so caught up on many things, did not give

1016
01:03:44.480 --> 01:03:45.480
up my break.

1017
01:03:45.480 --> 01:03:46.480
And then third, I want to persevere.

1018
01:03:46.480 --> 01:03:53.880
I took a few classes, including the last year and other Bible classes.

1019
01:03:53.880 --> 01:03:55.760
So I did not look for a job.

1020
01:03:55.760 --> 01:03:56.760
And I trust God.

1021
01:03:56.760 --> 01:04:00.160
I said, God, I don't trust what you're going to provide to me.

1022
01:04:00.160 --> 01:04:04.120
And there's a few servants that spoke to me, God will provide.

1023
01:04:04.120 --> 01:04:05.120
I had a confidence.

1024
01:04:05.280 --> 01:04:08.600
I said, God, even if I did not know where the money is going to come, if I only have

1025
01:04:08.600 --> 01:04:12.840
a few hundred dollars, I don't know about the next month's rent and food and whatever,

1026
01:04:12.840 --> 01:04:13.840
even tuition.

1027
01:04:13.840 --> 01:04:15.400
But God, I'm going to trust you.

1028
01:04:15.400 --> 01:04:22.320
But today, somehow I entertained the fear because I thought about before I was one time,

1029
01:04:22.320 --> 01:04:26.320
10 years ago, I would say, God, I want to live a life of faith.

1030
01:04:26.320 --> 01:04:31.880
I want to empty my bank account so I can start to live a faith life now.

1031
01:04:31.880 --> 01:04:37.600
So I did literally, that was fully, don't learn from me, please.

1032
01:04:37.600 --> 01:04:40.240
So because I did not have faith.

1033
01:04:40.240 --> 01:04:46.200
So I went through a process, even sometimes I did not have faith enough, and I borrowed

1034
01:04:46.200 --> 01:04:47.200
money from people.

1035
01:04:47.200 --> 01:04:52.160
I borrowed money from people because I faced, actually, I was a little baby, but I just

1036
01:04:52.160 --> 01:04:53.160
so zealous for God.

1037
01:04:53.160 --> 01:04:58.920
I said, God, I want to become a minister or a mission trip, whatever.

1038
01:04:58.920 --> 01:04:59.920
So I did that.

1039
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:06.600
thing before God's timing so then I thought today I can't entertain as a

1040
01:05:06.600 --> 01:05:11.680
God I did not go to work so where I going to spend money come from you know

1041
01:05:11.680 --> 01:05:17.280
so you can you cannot you cannot eat if it don't work you know kind of thing so

1042
01:05:17.280 --> 01:05:23.400
it's kind of feeling into my mind say oh I say no maybe I should go to look for

1043
01:05:23.400 --> 01:05:28.640
a job but I have a few classes I need time I need a break and we continue

1044
01:05:28.640 --> 01:05:32.540
receive healing from my brain from my head because I had a trauma the brain

1045
01:05:32.540 --> 01:05:37.100
circulation and oxygen flow the order blockage God is healing that I know the

1046
01:05:37.100 --> 01:05:44.280
blockage in the memory or counting you know so God is healing that big so thank

1047
01:05:44.280 --> 01:05:48.860
God so I entertain at a feel so I said the packs have been used because I

1048
01:05:48.860 --> 01:05:53.740
afraid of judge judgment afraid of punishment because actually I was

1049
01:05:53.740 --> 01:06:00.100
literally so Laura again I want to take a break I did not look for a job so

1050
01:06:00.100 --> 01:06:09.660
maybe again that repeat the lesson a lot many years ago I did not know so yeah

1051
01:06:09.660 --> 01:06:14.340
well and make sure to as y'all are praying about these kind of things

1052
01:06:14.340 --> 01:06:21.540
especially you know we want to be thinking about okay if we're gonna take

1053
01:06:21.540 --> 01:06:29.220
a season of rest if we need to pay rent we want to maybe consider well do we

1054
01:06:29.220 --> 01:06:33.380
want do we maybe need to live with someone else during that time you know

1055
01:06:33.380 --> 01:06:41.100
so that we can take a season of rest without fearing losing our home because

1056
01:06:41.100 --> 01:06:45.780
we don't have provision coming in if we don't have a job or if there's not other

1057
01:06:45.780 --> 01:06:48.740
money coming in and I'm not saying you have to just hurry and move but I want

1058
01:06:48.740 --> 01:06:53.500
you all to hear the other side of this sometimes fear is also keeping us from

1059
01:06:53.500 --> 01:06:58.060
getting the job because maybe we did feel like God was leading us and I'm not

1060
01:06:58.060 --> 01:07:01.300
saying you're doing the wrong thing joy but I just feel like as a leap as a

1061
01:07:01.300 --> 01:07:04.740
leader I need to make sure I bring balance because somebody could hear what

1062
01:07:04.740 --> 01:07:09.180
you're sharing and then go down that road and it's just not where the Lord is

1063
01:07:09.180 --> 01:07:15.140
actually leading them and so ladies be careful that you're not like allowing

1064
01:07:15.500 --> 01:07:21.500
if God says do something now it doesn't mean that that's always going to be the

1065
01:07:21.500 --> 01:07:27.020
forever decision does that make sense so some of you might need to be praying

1066
01:07:27.020 --> 01:07:34.300
like okay maybe it's time for me to step back into a job and not be afraid to do

1067
01:07:34.300 --> 01:07:37.900
that that I'm not gonna haven't had enough time to recover or whatever but

1068
01:07:37.900 --> 01:07:44.420
again just seek the Lord for balance in that because we want to be we want to

1069
01:07:44.420 --> 01:07:52.660
really be good stewards of our body as well as our finances so there's that's

1070
01:07:52.660 --> 01:07:55.860
where I'm saying just make sure there's balance in those kind of decisions and

1071
01:07:55.860 --> 01:08:00.580
we've had some people in the community and I'm not saying there's there's this

1072
01:08:00.580 --> 01:08:04.740
fine line because I believe I've had to do things where God asked me to step out

1073
01:08:04.740 --> 01:08:11.500
full in faith to go do something and then him provide okay but that's been

1074
01:08:11.500 --> 01:08:18.540
rare when I joined the program that was one of the times God was like take a

1075
01:08:18.540 --> 01:08:23.220
leap of faith you need to pay this and start this and I'm gonna provide for you

1076
01:08:23.220 --> 01:08:28.020
but he specifically told me personally that he didn't tell me that through other

1077
01:08:28.020 --> 01:08:35.700
people and that came through my time of devotion and reading the word okay but

1078
01:08:35.700 --> 01:08:40.700
there's not been a lot of times where God has led me to just you know go and

1079
01:08:40.700 --> 01:08:45.380
leave we had a lady that literally quit her job and I don't know that this is

1080
01:08:45.380 --> 01:08:50.180
the same situation as you joy so I'm not talking about you someone else but she

1081
01:08:50.180 --> 01:08:57.020
quit her job and she went to school and then people in her church were telling

1082
01:08:57.020 --> 01:09:01.460
her to just have faith to believe for the money to pay for her tuition mm-hmm

1083
01:09:01.460 --> 01:09:06.140
y'all I don't know how balanced that is

1084
01:09:06.700 --> 01:09:12.859
you know so just be really careful with that kind of stuff if you know again I

1085
01:09:12.859 --> 01:09:17.580
believe 100% to have faith and believe for things but we also need to make sure

1086
01:09:17.580 --> 01:09:24.140
we're making wise decisions wisdom should be our main guide okay faith is

1087
01:09:24.140 --> 01:09:29.220
very important but wisdom was on the scene when God was creating the earth I

1088
01:09:29.220 --> 01:09:34.020
want y'all to know that and be thinking about that wisdom should be what we

1089
01:09:34.020 --> 01:09:40.380
follow yes okay so joy just be careful we're gonna be praying for you we don't

1090
01:09:40.380 --> 01:09:44.899
want you to have fear but I also want to make sure that you are are living in a

1091
01:09:44.899 --> 01:09:54.300
way that you can have the things that you need to live yes yes I I do know

1092
01:09:54.300 --> 01:10:01.860
that God is does healing in my in my emotion on the brain

1093
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:09.660
whole body and I think yes God wanted me to take a break and yeah meanwhile I was

1094
01:10:09.660 --> 01:10:15.300
seeking the Lord and it seems that God says I am on your side I will provide

1095
01:10:15.300 --> 01:10:22.180
and because mine is yours yours is mine so I know so few prophet and servant

1096
01:10:22.180 --> 01:10:27.580
those say that God will they're praying for me you know and there's a thing but

1097
01:10:27.580 --> 01:10:35.260
then you what you said is very precious valuable to me is so crucial to seek

1098
01:10:35.260 --> 01:10:41.660
after wisdom face is one side but with an even more than more important than

1099
01:10:41.660 --> 01:10:48.100
faith so I think that's very good put very good reminder even there's one

1100
01:10:48.100 --> 01:10:53.880
sister her sword about me he say she's thought about me taking me into her

1101
01:10:53.880 --> 01:11:00.660
house and then I maybe heard her house is too far away from my church and where

1102
01:11:00.660 --> 01:11:08.640
I minister so it did not happen so but anyway but I continue just seek of

1103
01:11:08.640 --> 01:11:12.320
wisdom of God and see what he's doing for me especially to come from in

1104
01:11:12.320 --> 01:11:18.240
clarity thank you so much yes you're welcome you're so welcome thank you so

1105
01:11:18.240 --> 01:11:26.680
much for sharing joy Ruth go ahead okay yeah what I posted was so this was a

1106
01:11:26.680 --> 01:11:30.240
December of last year like just before the new year and then again in January

1107
01:11:30.240 --> 01:11:34.880
and then again in March I got prophetic word from different people and this will

1108
01:11:34.880 --> 01:11:38.680
like you know trust trusted sources like God bearing people that God was calling

1109
01:11:38.680 --> 01:11:43.760
me to move this year and because of what he was trying to do like he wanted to do

1110
01:11:43.760 --> 01:11:48.520
a divine reset and resettling in my life and just kind of what that was going

1111
01:11:48.520 --> 01:11:53.240
to come about and I got the word and I wasn't really at that point thinking

1112
01:11:53.240 --> 01:11:57.000
about it and I've just been feeling very like a sense of unease and restlessness

1113
01:11:57.000 --> 01:12:00.160
in my current job because like even though where I'm at right now is

1114
01:12:00.160 --> 01:12:06.000
stressful I'm in the middle of nowhere but it's it's familiar it's what I know

1115
01:12:06.000 --> 01:12:12.040
and so you know even though like a thought of like moving because it would

1116
01:12:12.360 --> 01:12:15.840
be Dallas Texas that I would be moving to and I've got family there's it's not

1117
01:12:15.840 --> 01:12:20.440
like here where I don't have anybody but just like all what would be until like

1118
01:12:20.440 --> 01:12:27.000
packing you know finding a new job like all the logistics just just scares me

1119
01:12:27.000 --> 01:12:33.040
you know all the parts of it and so the fear of that is just the big part of it

1120
01:12:33.040 --> 01:12:36.640
is that where the job I got right now was like such an answer to prayer at the

1121
01:12:36.640 --> 01:12:42.020
time that I'm so afraid of disappointing everybody around me here like the place

1122
01:12:42.020 --> 01:12:47.100
I go to church expectations that people have of me my supervisors my colleagues

1123
01:12:47.100 --> 01:12:54.020
my patients and just just the thought of disappointing everybody and and you know

1124
01:12:54.020 --> 01:12:58.300
and like why would I do that so I don't I'm just struggling with that fear of

1125
01:12:58.300 --> 01:13:02.820
that of like really I don't know if it's a fear of control because of saying yes

1126
01:13:02.820 --> 01:13:08.580
to God with me like giving up control and the sense of order and knowing how

1127
01:13:08.580 --> 01:13:12.860
things are and so yeah that's the big part of this where I'm struggling with

1128
01:13:12.860 --> 01:13:18.780
that that is yeah this is really good so I have a good question for you Ruth so

1129
01:13:18.780 --> 01:13:22.780
you mentioned that you're worried about disappointing everyone else what about

1130
01:13:22.780 --> 01:13:29.540
disappointing yourself yeah and I think I wonder if you thought have you thought

1131
01:13:29.540 --> 01:13:33.860
about that like if you if you want to move and you feel God is telling you to

1132
01:13:33.860 --> 01:13:38.380
move I think you're saying you want to I think you're saying it excites you but

1133
01:13:38.380 --> 01:13:43.940
it also makes you a little fearful but like think about as well like what about

1134
01:13:43.940 --> 01:13:51.460
Ruth what about you you know if we're so busy ladies taking care of other people

1135
01:13:51.460 --> 01:13:55.420
and worrying about how they're gonna feel if we do something we will probably

1136
01:13:55.420 --> 01:14:03.620
never take a step forward truly and I say that having been someone that I did

1137
01:14:03.620 --> 01:14:08.020
not want to move to meet my spirit mate I had already moved from Ohio to

1138
01:14:08.020 --> 01:14:12.700
Kentucky I want I kind of liked Kentucky I wanted to stay there I did

1139
01:14:12.700 --> 01:14:16.500
not y'all I literally I used to live in Ohio I said I was never moving back

1140
01:14:16.500 --> 01:14:21.660
north and you know and then I met Brian and he's from Indiana and guess what

1141
01:14:21.660 --> 01:14:26.100
y'all I ended up moving back north thank God I didn't stay there for long praise

1142
01:14:26.100 --> 01:14:30.940
the Lord he moved me to Florida but you know hey picking up my life and move in

1143
01:14:30.940 --> 01:14:38.500
like 15 hours away if I sat and thought about all the scary things I that's what

1144
01:14:38.500 --> 01:14:42.860
I would been consumed by and I'm not saying there weren't anxious moments

1145
01:14:42.860 --> 01:14:47.020
because there were there were a lot of things happening during that time but

1146
01:14:47.020 --> 01:14:51.580
there are a lot of really exciting things happening to you like good things

1147
01:14:51.580 --> 01:14:56.260
and you know we came down here and we visited and there's like you know like

1148
01:14:56.260 --> 01:15:01.980
we lived in a little town in Indiana where where there

1149
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:03.040
wasn't much, there was one little tiny grocery store

1150
01:15:03.040 --> 01:15:05.940
and a couple fast food restaurants.

1151
01:15:07.240 --> 01:15:10.540
That's not how, like, I mean, I grew up even in Ohio

1152
01:15:10.540 --> 01:15:12.120
in like city area.

1153
01:15:12.120 --> 01:15:14.880
And then when I lived in Kentucky, I lived in Lexington.

1154
01:15:14.880 --> 01:15:18.020
This was the first time I've been like in farm country.

1155
01:15:19.200 --> 01:15:20.580
And I loved it, you all did.

1156
01:15:20.580 --> 01:15:23.360
It gave me a breath in my soul.

1157
01:15:24.580 --> 01:15:27.740
It did some good stuff for me, but at the same rate,

1158
01:15:27.740 --> 01:15:29.680
I was missing, like, you know,

1159
01:15:29.680 --> 01:15:30.960
you just have to adjust your life.

1160
01:15:30.960 --> 01:15:32.520
You had to drive farther everywhere.

1161
01:15:32.520 --> 01:15:35.000
But I'm saying that to you, Ruth, to say,

1162
01:15:35.960 --> 01:15:39.640
man, I have some adventures and fun stories to tell now

1163
01:15:39.640 --> 01:15:41.560
from every movie that I've gone through,

1164
01:15:41.560 --> 01:15:43.400
from all of those experiences.

1165
01:15:43.400 --> 01:15:48.400
And when we allow the enemy to just cause us to be afraid,

1166
01:15:49.640 --> 01:15:53.240
and instead of like, well, this could be fun,

1167
01:15:53.240 --> 01:15:55.380
what are the fun things I could go do?

1168
01:15:55.380 --> 01:15:56.520
Do you see the flip side?

1169
01:15:56.540 --> 01:16:00.580
It doesn't mean we don't acknowledge those hard moments.

1170
01:16:00.580 --> 01:16:03.700
But like, what if you just let yourself dream a little bit,

1171
01:16:03.700 --> 01:16:05.560
maybe make a little,

1172
01:16:05.560 --> 01:16:08.220
take an eight and a half by 11 sheet of paper,

1173
01:16:08.220 --> 01:16:11.000
and just start looking up things in Dallas, Texas

1174
01:16:11.000 --> 01:16:15.540
that you might enjoy to go do, or just, and just-

1175
01:16:15.540 --> 01:16:17.080
I have a question, though.

1176
01:16:17.080 --> 01:16:17.920
Yeah, go ahead.

1177
01:16:17.920 --> 01:16:19.620
I just remember it came to me while you were talking,

1178
01:16:19.620 --> 01:16:21.940
because there was one night I was like praying,

1179
01:16:21.940 --> 01:16:24.100
I think maybe a couple of months ago.

1180
01:16:24.100 --> 01:16:26.380
And, because, you know, as part of phase one,

1181
01:16:27.200 --> 01:16:28.040
I said, don't date.

1182
01:16:28.040 --> 01:16:29.200
And so I had someone who through church

1183
01:16:29.200 --> 01:16:31.240
had reached out to me and wanted to start dating.

1184
01:16:31.240 --> 01:16:32.560
And I just put him down that, no,

1185
01:16:32.560 --> 01:16:33.840
God has me in a season right now

1186
01:16:33.840 --> 01:16:35.800
where that's not something that's in alignment

1187
01:16:35.800 --> 01:16:37.680
with what I'm, he has me.

1188
01:16:37.680 --> 01:16:39.840
And as I was just praying, I just had this in my,

1189
01:16:39.840 --> 01:16:41.440
I feel like it was the Holy Spirit that told me

1190
01:16:41.440 --> 01:16:43.240
that your spirit mate is not here in Boise,

1191
01:16:43.240 --> 01:16:45.120
your spirit mate is in Texas.

1192
01:16:45.120 --> 01:16:46.680
And it's part of why I want you to move.

1193
01:16:46.680 --> 01:16:48.840
And I'm like, oh God, that scared me even more,

1194
01:16:48.840 --> 01:16:51.920
because I felt like I have so much baggage

1195
01:16:51.920 --> 01:16:54.320
and so much work, internal work I need to do

1196
01:16:54.340 --> 01:16:57.700
that I'm not ready, or that I would scare the person off.

1197
01:16:57.700 --> 01:16:59.140
Even though it's a desire of my heart,

1198
01:16:59.140 --> 01:17:01.460
I was like, that even made me more scared to move,

1199
01:17:01.460 --> 01:17:03.100
because I'm like, at least if I'm here,

1200
01:17:03.100 --> 01:17:03.940
okay, I know they're not here,

1201
01:17:03.940 --> 01:17:05.860
so I'm always kind of like hiding.

1202
01:17:05.860 --> 01:17:09.460
Okay, okay, so this is a fear you need to,

1203
01:17:09.460 --> 01:17:11.300
you need to step over this thing.

1204
01:17:12.380 --> 01:17:13.660
Because here's the thing, Ruth,

1205
01:17:13.660 --> 01:17:14.900
you're going to keep healing,

1206
01:17:14.900 --> 01:17:17.460
even as you step into dating,

1207
01:17:17.460 --> 01:17:20.620
when you finish phase one, our heart work course.

1208
01:17:20.620 --> 01:17:22.500
When you finish this heart work course,

1209
01:17:22.500 --> 01:17:24.080
you're still going to do more heart work

1210
01:17:24.080 --> 01:17:26.460
in the next love story accelerator phase.

1211
01:17:27.480 --> 01:17:28.320
Okay.

1212
01:17:28.320 --> 01:17:29.200
Okay?

1213
01:17:29.200 --> 01:17:32.080
Ladies, you don't have to be afraid of moving forward

1214
01:17:32.080 --> 01:17:34.240
like you're not arrived enough.

1215
01:17:34.240 --> 01:17:36.960
And some of you, you will know, okay?

1216
01:17:36.960 --> 01:17:40.080
Some of you really need to wait and not date.

1217
01:17:40.080 --> 01:17:42.000
And typically you're the ones that you just,

1218
01:17:42.000 --> 01:17:43.800
you just want to keep flying right on through.

1219
01:17:43.800 --> 01:17:45.760
And then I have others that are just,

1220
01:17:45.760 --> 01:17:47.220
you're trying to be so careful

1221
01:17:47.220 --> 01:17:49.680
to get every little thing healed.

1222
01:17:49.680 --> 01:17:52.020
And that's a beautiful thing,

1223
01:17:52.520 --> 01:17:54.000
but here's the thing.

1224
01:17:54.000 --> 01:17:56.360
I've been married almost three years, Ruth,

1225
01:17:56.360 --> 01:17:58.860
and I still have plenty to heal.

1226
01:18:01.360 --> 01:18:02.780
Okay?

1227
01:18:02.780 --> 01:18:05.840
Even, even considering, you know,

1228
01:18:05.840 --> 01:18:09.340
baby stuff and fertility and fostering to adopt

1229
01:18:09.340 --> 01:18:10.680
and all these different options

1230
01:18:10.680 --> 01:18:12.680
that are out there floating around.

1231
01:18:12.680 --> 01:18:16.680
Yeah, we all face anxieties and fears all the time,

1232
01:18:16.680 --> 01:18:20.360
but we can move forward and step into the promised land,

1233
01:18:20.380 --> 01:18:22.540
but it's one step at a time.

1234
01:18:22.540 --> 01:18:24.300
So maybe the one step right now

1235
01:18:24.300 --> 01:18:27.400
is let's just start dreaming a little bit about Texas.

1236
01:18:28.820 --> 01:18:29.840
Okay?

1237
01:18:29.840 --> 01:18:32.620
And maybe as you dream and you let yourself dream,

1238
01:18:32.620 --> 01:18:34.580
maybe that will give you the courage

1239
01:18:34.580 --> 01:18:37.680
because the opposite of fear is faith,

1240
01:18:37.680 --> 01:18:39.640
but it's also courage.

1241
01:18:42.500 --> 01:18:45.760
God can give you the grace to have the courage.

1242
01:18:47.480 --> 01:18:48.420
All right?

1243
01:18:48.420 --> 01:18:49.260
I'm excited.

1244
01:18:49.260 --> 01:18:51.440
Let's see where this goes for you.

1245
01:18:51.440 --> 01:18:52.280
Thank you.

1246
01:18:52.280 --> 01:18:53.200
You're welcome.

1247
01:18:54.280 --> 01:18:55.120
Praise God.

1248
01:18:55.120 --> 01:18:56.560
Shadonna, go ahead.

1249
01:18:57.840 --> 01:18:58.840
Did I say it right?

1250
01:19:01.560 --> 01:19:02.960
Yes, ma'am, you did.

1251
01:19:02.960 --> 01:19:04.240
All right, awesome.

1252
01:19:05.520 --> 01:19:10.000
Mine is the fear of letting people in.

1253
01:19:10.000 --> 01:19:12.240
I've been through a lot,

1254
01:19:12.240 --> 01:19:15.520
and so I'm trying to balance being cautious

1255
01:19:15.520 --> 01:19:18.600
versus pushing people out because of the fear.

1256
01:19:20.200 --> 01:19:21.840
Okay.

1257
01:19:21.840 --> 01:19:26.920
So one of the things you're gonna wanna do

1258
01:19:26.920 --> 01:19:29.000
is you're gonna wanna ask the Lord to,

1259
01:19:29.000 --> 01:19:30.440
and you might already know what it is,

1260
01:19:30.440 --> 01:19:33.080
but still ask him to be sure, okay?

1261
01:19:33.080 --> 01:19:35.860
Because he knows us better than we even know ourselves.

1262
01:19:37.420 --> 01:19:39.100
I really wanna encourage you to ask the Lord,

1263
01:19:39.100 --> 01:19:44.040
when is the first time you let fear lead you

1264
01:19:44.040 --> 01:19:47.320
to like kind of put up a wall and block someone out?

1265
01:19:47.320 --> 01:19:48.680
Okay?

1266
01:19:48.700 --> 01:19:51.420
And then ask the Lord to heal that area

1267
01:19:52.500 --> 01:19:55.500
so that you can start to let people in again.

1268
01:19:56.460 --> 01:19:59.660
Because, you know, ladies, love is a risk.

1269
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:04.300
It's always gonna be a risk, even with friends, with family,

1270
01:20:04.300 --> 01:20:06.900
with a romantic person that you're dating,

1271
01:20:06.900 --> 01:20:10.360
hopefully will be your spirit mate and your spouse,

1272
01:20:10.360 --> 01:20:15.320
but it's also worth it when it's great, you know?

1273
01:20:15.320 --> 01:20:18.480
And I would never, I wouldn't change anything

1274
01:20:18.480 --> 01:20:22.080
about the risk that I've taken to be in love again

1275
01:20:22.080 --> 01:20:24.600
and be married and all of the things,

1276
01:20:24.600 --> 01:20:27.080
but we have to be willing to open up.

1277
01:20:27.080 --> 01:20:30.320
So for now, let's just start little by little.

1278
01:20:30.320 --> 01:20:33.720
So first start praying, Lord, when's the first time

1279
01:20:33.720 --> 01:20:38.160
I felt fear and I put walls up and I didn't let someone in?

1280
01:20:38.160 --> 01:20:39.460
And let's see what he shows you

1281
01:20:39.460 --> 01:20:40.940
and then put a post in the group

1282
01:20:40.940 --> 01:20:44.220
so that I can keep coaching you through that, okay?

1283
01:20:44.220 --> 01:20:45.520
Yes, ma'am.

1284
01:20:45.520 --> 01:20:46.480
Such a great share.

1285
01:20:46.480 --> 01:20:48.620
Thanks for sharing tonight.

1286
01:20:48.620 --> 01:20:49.460
Love it.

1287
01:20:49.460 --> 01:20:50.700
Marlena, go ahead.

1288
01:20:57.080 --> 01:21:02.080
Okay, I had to unmute, sorry.

1289
01:21:02.720 --> 01:21:04.600
Oh, that's all right.

1290
01:21:04.600 --> 01:21:09.360
Just today when you started talking about not showing up

1291
01:21:09.360 --> 01:21:13.000
as everything that we are or being beautiful,

1292
01:21:13.000 --> 01:21:15.840
all those things, and I found it really interesting

1293
01:21:15.840 --> 01:21:17.640
because it brought confirmation

1294
01:21:17.640 --> 01:21:22.640
to when I was doing my roots and fruits lesson,

1295
01:21:22.760 --> 01:21:24.560
I was waiting for God, I guess,

1296
01:21:24.560 --> 01:21:27.300
to tell me it was about things

1297
01:21:27.300 --> 01:21:30.480
that I've already dealt with in other words.

1298
01:21:30.480 --> 01:21:33.200
And so I'm thinking, okay, maybe rejection,

1299
01:21:33.200 --> 01:21:36.680
maybe in my head, but when God told me,

1300
01:21:36.680 --> 01:21:41.680
how about the lies that have kept you from being,

1301
01:21:41.880 --> 01:21:46.460
that keep telling you you're too much of anything?

1302
01:21:47.440 --> 01:21:52.440
So, and how that has kept you from walking in,

1303
01:21:52.920 --> 01:21:55.720
kept me from walking in everything God has for me.

1304
01:21:57.320 --> 01:22:02.320
And I'm getting emotional because you water yourself down

1305
01:22:05.600 --> 01:22:07.240
and you minimize yourself

1306
01:22:08.400 --> 01:22:12.300
because sometimes you've tried not to be seen.

1307
01:22:15.280 --> 01:22:16.840
Because when you have been seen,

1308
01:22:16.840 --> 01:22:20.360
you've dealt with so much criticism and judgment

1309
01:22:21.200 --> 01:22:25.280
of so many things.

1310
01:22:25.280 --> 01:22:27.720
And so you try not to be in God said,

1311
01:22:27.720 --> 01:22:29.840
but you have to be authentically you.

1312
01:22:29.840 --> 01:22:34.320
So, and I realized that even generationally,

1313
01:22:34.320 --> 01:22:36.160
these are conversations I've had

1314
01:22:36.160 --> 01:22:39.440
with other women in my family.

1315
01:22:41.360 --> 01:22:45.120
And so God is just really challenging me

1316
01:22:45.120 --> 01:22:49.080
to walk in everything I am

1317
01:22:49.080 --> 01:22:53.980
and not to stop talking or stop singing or not show up.

1318
01:22:55.720 --> 01:22:59.440
And so that really hit home when you said that today.

1319
01:23:00.840 --> 01:23:03.440
Yeah, man, that's so good.

1320
01:23:03.440 --> 01:23:06.360
Thank you for sharing that with us and trusting us.

1321
01:23:07.960 --> 01:23:12.200
Be sure Marlena, the lie that you're too much,

1322
01:23:13.240 --> 01:23:15.880
asking the Lord where that originated.

1323
01:23:15.880 --> 01:23:17.160
God, that's stuck in my hair.

1324
01:23:17.200 --> 01:23:19.920
Where that originated for you the first time,

1325
01:23:19.920 --> 01:23:21.200
like when is the first time

1326
01:23:21.200 --> 01:23:22.520
like you felt like you were too much

1327
01:23:22.520 --> 01:23:24.560
because you said about like feeling

1328
01:23:24.560 --> 01:23:26.240
like you needed to water yourself down,

1329
01:23:26.240 --> 01:23:28.240
that shrinking back.

1330
01:23:28.240 --> 01:23:30.480
We wanna look at where did we like,

1331
01:23:30.480 --> 01:23:33.240
when were the times where we started doing that way back

1332
01:23:33.240 --> 01:23:36.320
where then we kind of revert back to that subconsciously

1333
01:23:36.320 --> 01:23:39.320
when things happen in our lives today

1334
01:23:39.320 --> 01:23:42.440
and allow the Lord to come in and heal those areas

1335
01:23:42.440 --> 01:23:44.040
and maybe even forgiveness sheets

1336
01:23:44.040 --> 01:23:45.600
that might still need to be done

1337
01:23:45.600 --> 01:23:50.360
for things people said or did specifically

1338
01:23:50.360 --> 01:23:54.840
that caused us to feel like we needed to shrink back.

1339
01:23:55.920 --> 01:23:57.320
And one of the things I thought of,

1340
01:23:57.320 --> 01:23:59.560
I don't know if this resonates for you,

1341
01:23:59.560 --> 01:24:03.160
but I don't even really remember someone

1342
01:24:03.160 --> 01:24:04.280
saying this stuff to me,

1343
01:24:04.280 --> 01:24:08.640
but I remember feeling like I couldn't cry in the house.

1344
01:24:08.640 --> 01:24:10.920
And when I was older,

1345
01:24:11.800 --> 01:24:14.200
I actually had a pastor from the pulpit,

1346
01:24:14.200 --> 01:24:16.960
he was praying, this was over my former husband and I,

1347
01:24:16.960 --> 01:24:18.280
and we were not doing well

1348
01:24:18.280 --> 01:24:20.040
and we were at the altar getting prayer.

1349
01:24:20.040 --> 01:24:22.920
And he was like, you are too sensitive.

1350
01:24:22.920 --> 01:24:25.520
And he said something to my ex-husband,

1351
01:24:25.520 --> 01:24:28.040
but man, that like scarred me

1352
01:24:28.040 --> 01:24:32.400
because it just like went right into the core,

1353
01:24:32.400 --> 01:24:33.240
like somewhere.

1354
01:24:33.240 --> 01:24:36.240
And I just remember how hard it was for me to get over that

1355
01:24:37.720 --> 01:24:40.440
because I think deep down,

1356
01:24:40.440 --> 01:24:43.240
there were other times that that had been said to me

1357
01:24:43.280 --> 01:24:46.000
growing up, but I didn't even remember.

1358
01:24:46.000 --> 01:24:50.240
And so when he said that from like the pulpit altar area,

1359
01:24:50.240 --> 01:24:51.400
like praying over us,

1360
01:24:52.720 --> 01:24:54.840
it wasn't just that moment,

1361
01:24:54.840 --> 01:24:56.200
but it was the other things

1362
01:24:56.200 --> 01:24:59.000
that it was connected to when it happened, okay?

1363
01:24:59.000 --> 01:25:00.040
Do you see how that?

1364
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:02.200
kind of that links in there.

1365
01:25:02.200 --> 01:25:05.360
We'll be asking the Lord to reveal those first times

1366
01:25:05.360 --> 01:25:07.040
so that you can heal from those.

1367
01:25:07.040 --> 01:25:09.680
And then also I want you to practice.

1368
01:25:09.680 --> 01:25:12.360
I want you to practice talking, singing,

1369
01:25:12.360 --> 01:25:14.400
showing up as your full self,

1370
01:25:14.400 --> 01:25:16.020
because God in this world,

1371
01:25:16.020 --> 01:25:17.920
he created you to be your full self.

1372
01:25:17.920 --> 01:25:20.560
The world needs you to be you,

1373
01:25:20.560 --> 01:25:23.280
like who you were originally created to be.

1374
01:25:23.280 --> 01:25:26.920
And so next week we're gonna be talking about the real you,

1375
01:25:26.920 --> 01:25:29.040
and I think you all are gonna really love it.

1376
01:25:29.040 --> 01:25:30.240
I really, really do.

1377
01:25:30.240 --> 01:25:31.960
Thank you for sharing that with us tonight.

1378
01:25:31.960 --> 01:25:33.360
Leanne, go ahead.

1379
01:25:38.160 --> 01:25:40.160
I was sharing in the group.

1380
01:25:40.160 --> 01:25:42.240
I know I've shared a couple of things with you

1381
01:25:42.240 --> 01:25:43.680
through other messages,

1382
01:25:43.680 --> 01:25:47.520
but I've been spending a lot of time this past week

1383
01:25:47.520 --> 01:25:51.640
on letting the little Leanne have fun,

1384
01:25:51.640 --> 01:25:55.720
and going back, like what all has tied into a lot of that.

1385
01:25:55.800 --> 01:25:58.720
And we also talked about how

1386
01:26:00.280 --> 01:26:03.000
I've tried to help myself through all of this,

1387
01:26:03.000 --> 01:26:06.320
and always thought it was an abandonment issue.

1388
01:26:07.400 --> 01:26:09.960
But one of the things you said was,

1389
01:26:09.960 --> 01:26:11.160
with one of the things that I share

1390
01:26:11.160 --> 01:26:13.040
with hiding behind the couch

1391
01:26:13.040 --> 01:26:15.000
when I would watch my alcoholic father

1392
01:26:15.000 --> 01:26:17.260
beat my mom when I was two,

1393
01:26:17.260 --> 01:26:19.960
you had said, what would Jesus,

1394
01:26:19.960 --> 01:26:21.840
where was Jesus in that?

1395
01:26:21.840 --> 01:26:23.660
And what would he be saying to you?

1396
01:26:24.580 --> 01:26:29.580
And one of the things that he's been saying to me

1397
01:26:29.900 --> 01:26:32.060
is that it's time to now step out

1398
01:26:32.060 --> 01:26:35.940
from the fear of being truly known.

1399
01:26:37.780 --> 01:26:42.420
I've always been known or introduced as Melissa's sister,

1400
01:26:42.420 --> 01:26:45.820
or in college, I was Kristen's roommate's sister.

1401
01:26:47.900 --> 01:26:51.540
Very rarely do I remember being introduced just by my name.

1402
01:26:52.380 --> 01:26:56.420
And I've been able to start connecting dots

1403
01:26:56.420 --> 01:27:01.420
that kind of reinforce the hiding my true self

1404
01:27:01.420 --> 01:27:02.260
from everybody.

1405
01:27:05.620 --> 01:27:07.620
That's kind of where my fear lies,

1406
01:27:07.620 --> 01:27:09.940
and where I've been doing a lot of healing

1407
01:27:09.940 --> 01:27:11.540
over the last couple of days.

1408
01:27:12.540 --> 01:27:16.300
Okay, I have a little thing for you again this week.

1409
01:27:16.300 --> 01:27:17.780
This might seem like something simple,

1410
01:27:17.780 --> 01:27:21.340
but I literally just saw an image of this.

1411
01:27:22.100 --> 01:27:24.180
Again, it could be an eight and a half by 11,

1412
01:27:24.180 --> 01:27:26.260
doesn't have to be a poster board or anything,

1413
01:27:26.260 --> 01:27:30.300
but I want you to make a sign that says, I am Leanne,

1414
01:27:30.300 --> 01:27:32.220
and make it colorful and fun.

1415
01:27:32.220 --> 01:27:33.580
Do whatever you feel led,

1416
01:27:33.580 --> 01:27:36.140
whatever colors you feel led to use.

1417
01:27:36.140 --> 01:27:37.740
And I want you to hang it up,

1418
01:27:37.740 --> 01:27:39.160
and I want you to put it up somewhere

1419
01:27:39.160 --> 01:27:41.220
where you see it every day right now.

1420
01:27:41.220 --> 01:27:45.440
Because as you're healing from this stuff,

1421
01:27:46.820 --> 01:27:49.380
I almost feel like there's a level of owning

1422
01:27:49.380 --> 01:27:51.180
who you are in this.

1423
01:27:52.020 --> 01:27:55.140
So that like, I am Leanne and I am here.

1424
01:27:55.140 --> 01:27:57.500
Almost like even having that statement under there

1425
01:27:57.500 --> 01:27:59.500
is like a subtitle,

1426
01:27:59.500 --> 01:28:01.460
and allowing that to be something

1427
01:28:01.460 --> 01:28:04.340
that you just really partner with every day right now.

1428
01:28:04.340 --> 01:28:06.940
And obviously the Lord is working through you,

1429
01:28:06.940 --> 01:28:11.260
but you actually acknowledging the importance of your life

1430
01:28:11.260 --> 01:28:14.300
and who you are is gonna be really pivotal

1431
01:28:14.300 --> 01:28:15.140
for you right now.

1432
01:28:15.140 --> 01:28:18.080
I'm so excited for the steps you've already been taking

1433
01:28:18.080 --> 01:28:19.540
and the things you've been praying.

1434
01:28:19.540 --> 01:28:21.780
I really feel like there's a lot of energy,

1435
01:28:21.780 --> 01:28:23.500
like, y'all, when I say energy,

1436
01:28:23.500 --> 01:28:25.180
I mean the Holy Spirit, okay?

1437
01:28:25.180 --> 01:28:27.600
But there's a lot of his power

1438
01:28:27.600 --> 01:28:30.300
on all of this whole topic for you.

1439
01:28:31.220 --> 01:28:33.540
And so I'd love to see you get more breakthrough in that.

1440
01:28:33.540 --> 01:28:34.500
And I think this is one way

1441
01:28:34.500 --> 01:28:36.820
that you can step further into that.

1442
01:28:36.820 --> 01:28:37.660
Thank you.

1443
01:28:37.660 --> 01:28:38.500
You're welcome.

1444
01:28:38.500 --> 01:28:39.340
Thank you.

1445
01:28:39.340 --> 01:28:41.260
Kimberly, go ahead.

1446
01:28:41.260 --> 01:28:42.740
Okay, can you hear me?

1447
01:28:42.740 --> 01:28:43.580
Yeah, hi.

1448
01:28:43.580 --> 01:28:44.660
Okay.

1449
01:28:44.660 --> 01:28:49.420
So my fear is rejection.

1450
01:28:50.260 --> 01:28:52.540
And I actually have been just like,

1451
01:28:52.540 --> 01:28:53.860
reflecting back on it,

1452
01:28:53.860 --> 01:28:57.140
like every relationship that I've ever had,

1453
01:28:57.140 --> 01:28:58.580
I was always broken up with,

1454
01:28:58.580 --> 01:29:00.900
and I always took it so hard

1455
01:29:00.900 --> 01:29:02.700
and was so distraught about it.

1456
01:29:02.700 --> 01:29:06.700
But my marriage ended seven years ago

1457
01:29:06.700 --> 01:29:08.260
from my husband cheating,

1458
01:29:08.260 --> 01:29:09.540
and I wanted to work it out

1459
01:29:09.540 --> 01:29:11.700
and I wanted to do therapy and counseling,

1460
01:29:11.700 --> 01:29:13.380
and he did not want to.

1461
01:29:13.380 --> 01:29:18.380
And so he ended up divorcing me and marrying the mistress.

1462
01:29:18.500 --> 01:29:22.660
But my last relationship ended in June of last year.

1463
01:29:22.660 --> 01:29:25.300
That was almost a little over four years.

1464
01:29:26.460 --> 01:29:28.700
And he ended up leaving.

1465
01:29:28.700 --> 01:29:32.300
And that's what I'm struggling with is the rejection.

1466
01:29:32.300 --> 01:29:34.340
And I listened to a podcast the other day

1467
01:29:34.340 --> 01:29:36.140
and I found something interesting

1468
01:29:36.140 --> 01:29:39.660
is I might be addicted to rejection.

1469
01:29:39.660 --> 01:29:42.300
And although it's my biggest fear,

1470
01:29:42.300 --> 01:29:46.300
the lady said, you might be addicted to rejection

1471
01:29:46.300 --> 01:29:48.940
if you tie your value,

1472
01:29:48.940 --> 01:29:53.100
if your value is directly attached to your ability

1473
01:29:53.100 --> 01:29:55.500
to convince someone that you're worthy of love.

1474
01:29:57.740 --> 01:29:59.860
And so I am.

1475
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:06.080
I'm definitely fearful of rejection, but I do know that every time I was broken up with,

1476
01:30:06.080 --> 01:30:12.440
I was desperately trying to get back with them or show them that I was worthy, or if

1477
01:30:12.440 --> 01:30:15.240
they ended up leaving me for somebody else.

1478
01:30:15.240 --> 01:30:21.880
I took it so personally, and I don't know where all this came from.

1479
01:30:21.880 --> 01:30:27.560
I didn't have a great relationship with my dad, especially in my teen years.

1480
01:30:27.560 --> 01:30:34.600
My dad was military and ran a very strict religious house.

1481
01:30:34.600 --> 01:30:38.000
The only thing I can think of, and it popped up in my head the other day, and I don't remember

1482
01:30:38.000 --> 01:30:41.600
the first time he said it, but it had to be at some point when I was dating.

1483
01:30:41.600 --> 01:30:46.560
I remember he would say it to friends and family and even some of my boyfriends, including

1484
01:30:46.560 --> 01:30:53.000
my ex-husband, is he said, someday Kim is going to make some lucky young man absolutely

1485
01:30:53.000 --> 01:30:55.080
miserable.

1486
01:30:55.080 --> 01:30:59.360
He would say it jokingly, and I thought it was funny, too, because I was a brat.

1487
01:30:59.360 --> 01:31:02.800
I was not easily controlled, and we fought a lot.

1488
01:31:02.800 --> 01:31:05.400
Everything he wanted me to do, I would do the opposite.

1489
01:31:05.400 --> 01:31:09.080
At the time, I always thought it was funny, but when I was praying about and asking, where

1490
01:31:09.080 --> 01:31:10.180
did this come from?

1491
01:31:10.180 --> 01:31:15.400
Why am I so desperate to keep people, even if they're not right for me?

1492
01:31:15.400 --> 01:31:18.720
Why is it so hard when they leave?

1493
01:31:18.720 --> 01:31:21.520
I thought maybe they had something to do with it.

1494
01:31:21.520 --> 01:31:23.160
Let me ask you a question.

1495
01:31:23.160 --> 01:31:28.800
When your dad used to leave for the military, how did that make you feel?

1496
01:31:28.800 --> 01:31:35.800
My dad ended up putting in his 20 years when I was only four or five years old.

1497
01:31:35.800 --> 01:31:40.720
He wouldn't leave, but when I was born, my dad was overseas.

1498
01:31:40.720 --> 01:31:44.000
My mom said, I didn't see my dad until I was almost a year old.

1499
01:31:44.000 --> 01:31:50.160
She's like, you didn't like him because it was just you and I the whole time.

1500
01:31:50.160 --> 01:31:52.360
He didn't leave to go overseas or anything like that.

1501
01:31:52.360 --> 01:31:57.640
He was always a present dad as far as he had a job, but he worked real estate from when

1502
01:31:57.640 --> 01:32:02.600
I was probably seven years old on and was always home.

1503
01:32:02.600 --> 01:32:09.280
When you were one year old, between one and four, did your dad leave to go to travel for

1504
01:32:09.280 --> 01:32:11.560
the military, or was he there?

1505
01:32:11.560 --> 01:32:12.560
No.

1506
01:32:12.560 --> 01:32:13.560
He was home after that.

1507
01:32:13.560 --> 01:32:18.180
That was his last mission overseas, and he was home and was working a desk job.

1508
01:32:18.180 --> 01:32:22.140
He was a fighter pilot, and he was working a desk job to finish out his 20 years with

1509
01:32:22.140 --> 01:32:23.140
the Navy.

1510
01:32:23.140 --> 01:32:24.140
Okay.

1511
01:32:24.140 --> 01:32:26.340
Then my other question for you, I wrote this first.

1512
01:32:26.340 --> 01:32:29.860
When you were talking about, you're always broken up with, you're talking to us about

1513
01:32:29.860 --> 01:32:35.140
these most recent relationships, and I do think that those are part of them, but I want

1514
01:32:35.140 --> 01:32:41.060
to know about the first person you ever dated that you felt like left you.

1515
01:32:41.060 --> 01:32:46.500
Gosh, I feel like I'm trying to remember.

1516
01:32:46.500 --> 01:32:52.620
Everybody I dated in high school, I always remember that they broke up with me, and it

1517
01:32:52.620 --> 01:33:00.380
was probably even starting in my sophomore year when I had a boyfriend for almost a year.

1518
01:33:00.380 --> 01:33:04.940
He was abusive, but he was still the one that broke up with me.

1519
01:33:04.940 --> 01:33:05.940
Okay.

1520
01:33:05.940 --> 01:33:10.740
I'm going to bring up a couple other things, and I'm going to then quickly ... Actually,

1521
01:33:11.420 --> 01:33:12.420
Jay French, I just saw your hand went up.

1522
01:33:12.420 --> 01:33:17.300
I'm only going to be able to take Mika, because we're already after 9.30, but if you, Jay

1523
01:33:17.300 --> 01:33:22.900
French, will put your question or thoughts in the app, I definitely will respond to you

1524
01:33:22.900 --> 01:33:23.900
there.

1525
01:33:23.900 --> 01:33:24.900
Okay?

1526
01:33:24.900 --> 01:33:25.900
Mika, you can keep your hand up, because I'm going to come to you next.

1527
01:33:25.900 --> 01:33:26.900
All right.

1528
01:33:26.900 --> 01:33:31.940
A couple things that I think are super important.

1529
01:33:31.940 --> 01:33:37.820
I'm not saying I disagree with that person, because I can kind of see what they were saying

1530
01:33:37.980 --> 01:33:45.420
as far as the underlying ... We shouldn't be so desperate to convince someone to stay

1531
01:33:45.420 --> 01:33:50.460
with us, especially when they're not healthy people, but I can relate to what you're saying,

1532
01:33:50.460 --> 01:33:57.780
but ultimately at the core, we have low self-worth and value for ourselves.

1533
01:33:57.780 --> 01:34:05.820
That comes from us somewhere having abandonment, loneliness at the core of who we are when

1534
01:34:05.820 --> 01:34:13.020
we're young a lot of times, and so I want to encourage you, instead of trying to figure

1535
01:34:13.020 --> 01:34:19.740
out if you're addicted to rejection or not, the reality is that you need healing, and

1536
01:34:19.740 --> 01:34:23.620
you need to know who you are in Christ, and the more that you know your value and your

1537
01:34:23.620 --> 01:34:31.900
worth in Christ, you're not going to try to convince somebody to love you, okay?

1538
01:34:31.900 --> 01:34:36.420
And I know that can be harder than in the process.

1539
01:34:36.420 --> 01:34:40.820
It's not always easy to figure that kind of stuff out, but I believe you're in the best

1540
01:34:40.820 --> 01:34:46.580
place you could ever be in right now to really get supernatural healing in some of the depths

1541
01:34:46.580 --> 01:34:51.460
of your being and ways that you don't even know that you need it right now, that God's

1542
01:34:51.460 --> 01:34:53.540
going to set you free from stuff.

1543
01:34:53.540 --> 01:34:59.980
But the other thing is also, you know, ladies, rejection isn't always...

1544
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:04.320
a bad thing. Sometimes it's redirection.

1545
01:35:07.200 --> 01:35:12.560
Okay, so I want some of you just to be really thinking about, you know, some of the times where

1546
01:35:12.560 --> 01:35:21.600
God was redirecting your life through a breakup that you had. Now the other thing that I think

1547
01:35:21.600 --> 01:35:25.920
is important for you, Kimberly, because you kind of now have partnered with this,

1548
01:35:25.920 --> 01:35:30.160
I'm always broken up with. So that's what you believe at the core of who you are,

1549
01:35:30.160 --> 01:35:35.280
because that's what's been happening. But the only way for that to shift is for you to heal

1550
01:35:35.280 --> 01:35:42.640
and also to stop claiming that over yourself. Okay. Like, even if you experience it again,

1551
01:35:43.600 --> 01:35:49.280
you're going to have to really war against agreeing with the enemy that I'm always broken up with.

1552
01:35:49.920 --> 01:35:54.720
And then the last thing I have for you is I really want to encourage you to do a forgiveness prayer

1553
01:35:55.040 --> 01:36:02.080
regarding what your dad said over you and to other people about you. Because I think that is a part

1554
01:36:02.080 --> 01:36:07.840
of the hang up here internally for you too. Okay. Yeah. I gave you a couple things. I know there

1555
01:36:07.840 --> 01:36:12.640
was a lot there, but I felt like they were all important. Thank you so much for sharing. Mika,

1556
01:36:12.640 --> 01:36:21.040
go ahead. Thank you. Hi, everyone. Thanks for this. This has been so helpful. Good. Yeah. So I

1557
01:36:21.200 --> 01:36:29.360
I, I was going through just like the activation that you mentioned earlier, just writing down

1558
01:36:29.360 --> 01:36:34.080
the different things. And also you were talking about anxieties for this time. And for me,

1559
01:36:35.040 --> 01:36:38.960
one of the things I was trying to, I would be getting rid of, or the thing that was causing

1560
01:36:38.960 --> 01:36:47.680
the anxiety is my wedding dress from eight years ago. The eight years ago is ex, I guess,

1561
01:36:47.680 --> 01:36:56.080
ex-fiance, whatever you would want to call. You know, I had so many hopes in that. And I,

1562
01:36:56.080 --> 01:37:00.560
you know, just, I invested so much in putting into the wedding dress and I was excited about it

1563
01:37:00.560 --> 01:37:08.320
and no one had seen it, but my, my best friends, my closest friends. And when I found out he cheated,

1564
01:37:08.320 --> 01:37:13.440
of course the way, you know, everything was off, you know, all of that. But again, no one had

1565
01:37:13.440 --> 01:37:19.760
really seen the wedding dress, but I had invested so much in it. And so when I ended it, my friends

1566
01:37:19.760 --> 01:37:23.840
were like, well, when are we going to have the burning dress ceremony? And I'm like, burning

1567
01:37:23.840 --> 01:37:31.200
dress ceremony? No, that's mine. I invested in it. I paid it and pay for it. And he wasn't worthy of

1568
01:37:31.200 --> 01:37:37.600
it. So the right one that God does have for me will appreciate it because it fits me perfectly.

1569
01:37:38.160 --> 01:37:43.520
But then when I was doing the spring cleaning and just going over this activation, I feel like

1570
01:37:43.520 --> 01:37:48.720
God is just really prompting me that I need to release it and let it go. You know, I don't need

1571
01:37:48.720 --> 01:37:54.800
to, there are other beautiful dresses that I saw and this is a new season. And when I look at it,

1572
01:37:54.800 --> 01:38:00.160
like when you were sharing about your t-shirt, I think I was in denial about that. I was in

1573
01:38:00.160 --> 01:38:04.240
denial, pride or whatever it might be. And I looked at it, you know, I just,

1574
01:38:05.760 --> 01:38:12.000
there's no way to separate the pain and that whole process. I mean, I guess supernaturally

1575
01:38:12.000 --> 01:38:17.520
that could happen, but that has not happened to me. When I look at that dress, he's attached to

1576
01:38:17.520 --> 01:38:26.480
the dress, unfortunately. And you're about to step into a new season. And so as you're stepping

1577
01:38:26.480 --> 01:38:32.480
into your new, you don't want to be thinking about the past. I think you're definitely onto

1578
01:38:32.480 --> 01:38:37.840
something here. And, and, and when, as you pray about what to do with the dress, I want you to

1579
01:38:37.840 --> 01:38:45.600
think of it as whether you sell it or whatever you do with it as sowing a seed. Okay. You're

1580
01:38:45.600 --> 01:38:50.160
sowing a seed into your future because God has something new for you. And he has another

1581
01:38:50.160 --> 01:38:54.480
beautiful dress for you that you're going to be able to enjoy. And you're going to wear it down

1582
01:38:54.480 --> 01:38:58.880
that aisle and you're going to be walking towards your spirit mate. Hopefully that you're going to

1583
01:38:58.880 --> 01:39:05.600
pick someone that's healthy and amazing and all of the things, but. Would you mind just sharing,

1584
01:39:05.600 --> 01:39:11.440
would you mind just sharing when there were moments when you did need to get rid of something

1585
01:39:11.440 --> 01:39:16.640
physically, like destroy, like, like, cause I know like, sometimes people talk about things

1586
01:39:16.640 --> 01:39:21.680
that are happening spiritually with garments and just things like that of that nature.

1587
01:39:21.680 --> 01:39:25.600
Would you mind just sharing some wisdom on that? Like, um, that I can just.

1588
01:39:26.400 --> 01:39:33.520
Well, I think first and foremost, I think a ladies, um, you know, God is supernatural. He there,

1589
01:39:33.520 --> 01:39:39.200
you know, he's spiritual obviously, but there are a lot of churches over out there that over

1590
01:39:39.200 --> 01:39:45.200
spiritualized things too. Okay. So I think balance I'm very big on saying balance is key. I think

1591
01:39:45.200 --> 01:39:51.200
having balance in everything is really, really important. I do think that, um, and I don't want

1592
01:39:51.200 --> 01:39:56.640
to go too far into this cause at the time we're at, but just, there are times where.

1593
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:06.960
Even when I think back to trauma moments, there were things that I had that my dad gave me

1594
01:40:08.960 --> 01:40:13.760
when he was in prison and all this stuff. And every time I would look at that little pound

1595
01:40:13.760 --> 01:40:17.440
puppy, it wasn't a real one, it was a fake one, he sent it. And that was such a big thing for

1596
01:40:17.440 --> 01:40:22.720
me at that time for whatever reason. But the fact that he sent it, I loved it. But then every time

1597
01:40:22.720 --> 01:40:28.320
I looked at it, all I could think of is my dad's not here, he's in jail. So it actually made me

1598
01:40:28.320 --> 01:40:35.120
more sad. And so I eventually got rid of it. I mean, I was like a preteen at the time,

1599
01:40:35.120 --> 01:40:44.640
because it made me more sad to have it. So that was one time. And I think praying is the biggest

1600
01:40:44.640 --> 01:40:50.640
thing. I shouldn't say I think, I know. When I went through my spring cleaning thing, I prayed,

1601
01:40:50.640 --> 01:40:55.680
and this was even long after I was leading groups at this time, and God led me to go back through

1602
01:40:55.680 --> 01:41:00.800
spring clean again. And you all I found, I don't know, I don't know if it was one of those times

1603
01:41:00.800 --> 01:41:04.800
where, you know, siblings were bringing me things from my mom's house or what, but I ended up finding

1604
01:41:04.800 --> 01:41:12.160
this box from my high school sweetheart. He was a guy I dated for several years. And he would write

1605
01:41:12.160 --> 01:41:17.120
me all these little notes. And they were very sweet, but little teddy bear that he got me

1606
01:41:17.120 --> 01:41:24.800
pictures, all kinds of stuff. And there was a part of me that was like, I wasn't I wasn't with Brian

1607
01:41:24.800 --> 01:41:29.040
or any of that kind of stuff, y'all. I was this was before I even met him. But there was a part

1608
01:41:29.040 --> 01:41:35.040
of me that wanted to hang on to that stuff. And then I was like, Well, why would I do that? Like,

1609
01:41:35.920 --> 01:41:41.280
I'm not with this person anymore. I don't need all of these notes anymore. It's just taking up

1610
01:41:41.280 --> 01:41:47.840
space in my closet. And so without thinking anything else about it, I dumped all like,

1611
01:41:47.840 --> 01:41:52.080
I think I kept some of the pictures or whatever. But I dumped all that stuff in the garbage. And

1612
01:41:52.080 --> 01:41:56.560
then I just I pulled the garbage bag out of the thing. And I walked it up to I was in an apartment

1613
01:41:56.560 --> 01:41:59.680
at the time to the garbage thing, because I thought I don't want to second guess myself.

1614
01:41:59.680 --> 01:42:04.400
So I'm just gonna get rid of it. And I think that there's something important about that,

1615
01:42:04.400 --> 01:42:12.320
because we're severing the old and making room for the new. But that came through praying and

1616
01:42:12.320 --> 01:42:18.320
asking God to show me things I needed to get rid of. And then I came across that box. I didn't even

1617
01:42:18.400 --> 01:42:23.280
know what was in it. You all I had literally gotten it recently, because my, my mom, we had

1618
01:42:23.280 --> 01:42:28.720
downsized her house and apartment after she passed and all that stuff. And that's when that box got

1619
01:42:28.720 --> 01:42:34.320
given to me. But I just literally brought it to my apartment and put it in the closet and never even

1620
01:42:34.320 --> 01:42:40.000
looked in it until that day that I was praying and doing that with the Lord. And so you know,

1621
01:42:40.000 --> 01:42:44.880
just be praying, whether it's clothes or things, God will show you what you need to get rid of.

1622
01:42:45.600 --> 01:42:54.160
Yeah. Yeah, you're welcome. We are at 945. And we need to close. Here are your activations for

1623
01:42:54.160 --> 01:42:59.280
this week. And as she was sharing, one of the things is letting go. And in order to let go,

1624
01:42:59.280 --> 01:43:04.960
we need to make a list of the things as we're praying and asking God, what do we need to let

1625
01:43:04.960 --> 01:43:10.960
go and leave behind in the past so that we can move forward into the future. And after you make

1626
01:43:10.960 --> 01:43:17.040
this list, you can do other things too. Okay, so pray about this, but I'm just giving you two,

1627
01:43:17.040 --> 01:43:24.160
two ways that you can activate letting go. Okay. Number one is write the list and then in a safe

1628
01:43:24.160 --> 01:43:32.400
place, burn it. Watch that sucker burn. Okay, it's gonna feel good. Number two, I love the balloon

1629
01:43:32.400 --> 01:43:37.680
release idea too, but I wouldn't put your list on the balloon. I would just watch the balloons go

1630
01:43:37.680 --> 01:43:44.080
and then rip your list up or something like that. Okay. So why do we do this? Well, because

1631
01:43:44.080 --> 01:43:49.920
you're activating your faith and saying, okay, I'm letting go of the past and I'm stepping into the

1632
01:43:49.920 --> 01:43:57.200
new. So whatever needs to be on your list is Lord, what do I need to leave in the past and not take

1633
01:43:57.200 --> 01:44:04.080
into my tomorrows into the future? Okay. And then the other one is a mirror activation.

1634
01:44:04.960 --> 01:44:12.000
Hey, I issue these every couple months. It's time for another one. What you do with this is I want

1635
01:44:12.000 --> 01:44:17.680
you to stand in front of a mirror. So if you have a full length mirror, do it in front of a full

1636
01:44:17.680 --> 01:44:25.040
length mirror. Okay. But I want you to look in the mirror and I want you to like set a timer to do it

1637
01:44:25.040 --> 01:44:32.400
for at least two to three minutes. Ladies. I want you to look at yourself and really like look at

1638
01:44:33.280 --> 01:44:39.040
yourself. Okay. And I want you to pay attention to, do you have negative thoughts about yourself?

1639
01:44:39.040 --> 01:44:44.720
I want you to, if there's a part of your body that you typically put down, I want you to actually

1640
01:44:44.720 --> 01:44:52.000
love on that part of yourself during this mirror activation. Hey, so I used to like be really hard

1641
01:44:52.000 --> 01:44:56.000
on myself about my legs. Cause I gained weight in my legs and my butt the first I'm like,

1642
01:44:56.000 --> 01:44:59.920
oh my gosh, it's so annoying. And so I get so frustrated about that. And I would just.

1643
01:45:00.000 --> 01:45:03.880
it's like be critical of myself in the mirror.

1644
01:45:03.880 --> 01:45:06.720
And the Lord really, really convicted me of those things.

1645
01:45:06.720 --> 01:45:09.320
And so I want you to learn to love yourself

1646
01:45:09.320 --> 01:45:12.560
and love all the parts of yourself,

1647
01:45:12.560 --> 01:45:16.840
even the parts that you don't like, okay?

1648
01:45:16.840 --> 01:45:20.260
And I want you to also take it to the next step.

1649
01:45:20.260 --> 01:45:22.360
Yes, I can put these instructions in there.

1650
01:45:22.360 --> 01:45:26.320
I want you to actually thank God for how you are,

1651
01:45:26.320 --> 01:45:30.560
like features that you don't like on your face.

1652
01:45:30.560 --> 01:45:32.040
Maybe it's something about,

1653
01:45:32.040 --> 01:45:33.320
I used to always get really,

1654
01:45:33.320 --> 01:45:34.960
like my brothers made fun of me

1655
01:45:34.960 --> 01:45:37.300
because I didn't have a big chest

1656
01:45:37.300 --> 01:45:39.320
and they used to like say all kinds of stuff.

1657
01:45:39.320 --> 01:45:41.400
And so then it was like a big thing,

1658
01:45:41.400 --> 01:45:43.840
my whole life almost until literally

1659
01:45:43.840 --> 01:45:45.280
until y'all got married,

1660
01:45:45.280 --> 01:45:46.360
like right before I got married,

1661
01:45:46.360 --> 01:45:48.320
I got set free from that.

1662
01:45:48.320 --> 01:45:51.060
Very much intimidated about all that kind of stuff.

1663
01:45:51.060 --> 01:45:52.400
And so it's crazy,

1664
01:45:52.400 --> 01:45:54.760
this stuff that we carry even as adults.

1665
01:45:54.800 --> 01:45:57.760
So wanna encourage you to let it go.

1666
01:45:57.760 --> 01:45:59.240
You are beautiful.

1667
01:46:00.120 --> 01:46:03.440
God made you fearfully and wonderfully.

1668
01:46:03.440 --> 01:46:07.400
He didn't mess up anything, okay?

1669
01:46:07.400 --> 01:46:08.680
Let me pray for you.

1670
01:46:08.680 --> 01:46:10.400
Father, thank you so much for this night.

1671
01:46:10.400 --> 01:46:12.840
Thank you for revealings, for healing that have happened.

1672
01:46:12.840 --> 01:46:14.960
God, we thank you for supernatural breakthroughs

1673
01:46:14.960 --> 01:46:16.020
continuing this week.

1674
01:46:16.020 --> 01:46:19.560
We thank you God for transformational mindsets,

1675
01:46:19.560 --> 01:46:22.600
healing rivers and waters flowing over

1676
01:46:22.600 --> 01:46:23.700
every one of these ladies,

1677
01:46:23.700 --> 01:46:25.340
those that are watching the replay.

1678
01:46:25.340 --> 01:46:28.340
God, we thank you for from the top down,

1679
01:46:28.340 --> 01:46:29.860
God, that you're setting them free,

1680
01:46:29.860 --> 01:46:32.540
that you're redeeming, you're restoring, you're rebuilding.

1681
01:46:32.540 --> 01:46:35.540
God, we thank you that you would place the balm of Gilead

1682
01:46:35.540 --> 01:46:38.540
upon every wound, every part of their hearts,

1683
01:46:38.540 --> 01:46:40.500
their bodies, their minds, their spirits and souls.

1684
01:46:40.500 --> 01:46:44.680
We thank you for guarding and keeping watch over them

1685
01:46:44.680 --> 01:46:45.620
and keeping them safe.

1686
01:46:45.620 --> 01:46:49.780
We thank you and speak a Salem rest over Helen,

1687
01:46:49.780 --> 01:46:50.940
as she was saying earlier,

1688
01:46:50.940 --> 01:46:52.800
and anybody else that struggles with sleep,

1689
01:46:52.800 --> 01:46:54.600
we speak Salem rest.

1690
01:46:54.600 --> 01:46:58.320
And Lord, we also just lift up, gosh, who was it?

1691
01:46:58.320 --> 01:47:01.080
Your mom, your mom, I gotta find you.

1692
01:47:01.080 --> 01:47:04.380
Aaron, we thank you right now for Aaron's mom.

1693
01:47:04.380 --> 01:47:07.020
God, we ask you to guard and keep watch over her,

1694
01:47:07.020 --> 01:47:09.320
that you would just come against the sickness

1695
01:47:09.320 --> 01:47:11.040
and disease of cancer,

1696
01:47:11.040 --> 01:47:14.040
and that you would remove every cancer cell from her body

1697
01:47:14.040 --> 01:47:17.440
and you would align her with the, yes, Lord,

1698
01:47:17.440 --> 01:47:20.160
the heavenly perspective of her body.

1699
01:47:20.160 --> 01:47:21.960
God, we thank you that you're the great physician

1700
01:47:21.960 --> 01:47:23.400
that nothing's too hard for you.

1701
01:47:23.400 --> 01:47:26.840
We thank you that you're working in her mom right now.

1702
01:47:26.840 --> 01:47:29.600
We pray that you would ask you to comfort her mom,

1703
01:47:29.600 --> 01:47:32.040
that you would keep her and minister to her

1704
01:47:32.040 --> 01:47:36.120
for those that have lost mothers or fathers or siblings,

1705
01:47:36.120 --> 01:47:38.120
or friends, God, recently,

1706
01:47:38.120 --> 01:47:40.980
we ask you to comfort them and keep them as well.

1707
01:47:40.980 --> 01:47:41.820
God, we love you.

1708
01:47:41.820 --> 01:47:42.640
We thank you.

1709
01:47:42.640 --> 01:47:44.280
Show us more about who you are

1710
01:47:44.280 --> 01:47:47.040
and help us to have the ability to receive it.

1711
01:47:47.040 --> 01:47:48.960
In Jesus name, amen.

1712
01:47:48.960 --> 01:47:49.840
God bless you.

1713
01:47:49.840 --> 01:47:51.400
I'll see you all in the group.

1714
01:47:51.840 --> 01:47:54.040
Have a great night, everyone.

1715
01:47:54.040 --> 01:47:54.880
Bye.

1716
01:47:54.880 --> 01:47:55.720
Bye.