Hey everyone. So glad to see all of you tonight. I see some of you waving. Hi there. I'm glad
to see you. So excited for tonight and what God is going to do in all of your lives. If
those of you in the community may not have met me before, I think some of our guys might
not have seen me before. If you haven't been on a live session, I'm Bethany Cooper. I'm
one of the master heartwork coaches here in the community. And a lot of the ladies know
me because they've gone through the heartwork when I've been coaching. But so good to see
all of you tonight. I have just a couple quick housekeeping things. As a reminder, we always
do the Faith Friday. That is COED on Fridays at 10 a.m. Eastern time. You all can find
the links for all of those things, any events that I'm going to mention in the events calendar.
As a reminder, all of our Zoom links are going to change once a month. So don't be saving
Zoom links to your computer or phone or anything like that. Just go right to the app. The link
is in there. The Zoom meeting ID, code, passcode, all of that is in your events tab inside of
the event. And then Saturday, another Supernatural Saturday with Jackie. You all, it's going
to be Sunday's Pentecost Sunday. So we're going to do a special session on Saturday.
So would love for you all to come on Saturday and just hear what God has put on Jackie's
heart for that. And then she will announce more of the things we're going to do around
Pentecost Sunday then. And then next Tuesday night is Loveseats. Loveseats at 8 p.m. Eastern
time. So that is when any of you can get into the Loveseat and ask your dating questions,
whether you're currently dating or you're trying to date on the app or you're just having
a hard time being able to date at all. That's a great time to get into the Loveseat and
ask Jackie personally. You have her time and her attention, what her viewpoint is on all
of those things. And so if you would like to be in the Loveseat, just know that you
can you can even create a post in one of the groups and let us know you want to be in Loveseat
or comment on our weekly roll call. Our team will see that and then we'll add you to that
list to be in the Loveseat. And for the men, same thing goes. We look at all of those and
I can add you to that. So let me pray for us and we're going to get started. Father,
thank you so much for this night. God, thank you that you see us. You see every aspect
of where we've been, of where we are and God, where you want to take us. So where we just
thank you that you reveal areas for healing and every area that's needed as we continue
to surrender the pen to you, as we continue to seek your guidance, your love, your instruction,
your revelation. God, we thank you that you help us to see what we can't see, Lord, the
things that are in our subconscious still that continue to trip us up or allow fear
or anxieties to rise and to kind of run away with our minds and not only our minds, but our
lives. So Lord, I thank you that you would bring your truth tonight. We know that your truth is
what sets the captives free. And so we just thank you for that in advance for everyone that's going
to get revelation, for insight, for breakthroughs, not only tonight, but in the days to come. Holy
Spirit, we ask you to come and have your way in us, through us. We thank you for dunamis power.
We thank you the same power that rose Jesus Christ from the dead is living in us and can
operate us through us. And we just ask for that power to be here tonight. Even myself, Lord,
I can't coach them without you. So Lord, I thank you for the reminder that you're the vine and
we're the branches. So help us, Lord, to lean into what your spirit is saying in Jesus name. Amen.
So some of y'all, if you've never heard this content, what I'm going to share tonight,
as far as in the beginning, is from the heartwork course materials. And inside of Jackie's book,
it might be a little bit of kind of revisiting for some of you, but it is where the Lord has
been leading us to go for tonight's session. And so we're excited and hoping that when I open it up
for you all to get into the heartwork seat, that I have some volunteers. So prepare yourself,
because I need some volunteers to get into the heartwork seat tonight. And it doesn't matter
what the question is about. If it's relationship, we can coach on that. If it's personal, job,
finances, it doesn't matter. If there's something that comes up while I'm coaching,
you might want to get into the heartwork seat. If you're not really sure how to overcome that thing,
or you can't see kind of what the root of that is, and we'll get through as many people as we can
tonight. All right. So we want to identify the fruits so that we can trace all the way to the
root. A lot of the people that go through heartwork now, one of the things that we're doing
a lot with them is an actual tree activation. And I can put an example of these up in the groups.
The men can do this too. Women, men, it can be very simple. It doesn't have to be super artistic.
Everybody likes to do it differently, but we literally start to
identify what are the roots, what are the root things happening in our lives and how do we
identify those? Well, what's the fruit? What's the unhealthy fruit as well as healthy fruit that's
showing up in our lives? It's good to look at both. Okay, so even before I coach tonight,
I really want to emphasize, y'all, we have to celebrate our wins along the way.
Because if we don't, we're just going to feel down all the time because heartwork is an ongoing
process. Like even myself, I've been married almost three years. Heartwork is always happening.
We're interacting with people that are unhealthy. We still have things inside of ourselves. And so
celebrate your wins often and look at where God has brought you from. But that roots and fruits
tree activation is really helping people be honest with themselves and really identify what's still
not showing up healthy in my life. So our problem areas when we're looking at, okay, if you're
looking at your life, where are you still stuck? If y'all remember one of the last advanced heart
work, that was one of the things we were talking about. Look at where you're still stuck. Where
are you going around the same mountain over and over and over again? Or maybe it's, you know,
you're not intending to, but there's something subconsciously like happening that you're just
feeling like nothing ever changes in an area. That's right there, a signal to you that there's
heartwork that probably needs to be done in some area, whether you realize it or not. And that's
what's keeping you stuck. These are the most unhealed wounded areas of our lives. Sometimes
it's also those patterns in our minds of, as we've been talking about that in the group, Jackie did
a path session a couple of weeks ago. If you haven't heard the replay of that, ladies and gentlemen,
both it's in your courses tab, and then it's inside the path sessions. Check that out because
she's really getting into breaking down the mindsets that are keeping a lot of us bound in
different ways. But when we're looking at the unhealed wounds, those are the areas that
are typically harboring fear, lies, and false narratives. So if you're feeling fear rising up
in an area on a regular basis, or you're someone that gets triggered a lot, guess what you all,
triggers come from all kinds of fragmentation, but a lot of the time fear is a master culprit.
Because there's something that we're believing that's causing us to get triggered as soon as
that situation is happening with that person. And it could be the same person over and over, or it
could be different people, but the same problem is presenting itself over and over and over again.
All right, these unhealed wounds, I'm going to repeat that for our note takers. I see some people
taking notes. The unhealed wounds are the areas that are harboring the fears, lies, and false
narratives. And those are the things that are creating havoc in our lives. Because these fears,
lies, and false narratives, they don't stay as babies, if you will. They mature over time. So
one of the sessions I've done before, I talked about how when, let's say situation number one
happens, and we're wounded here and we don't heal in this area. Well, then when the next thing
happens that feels, sounds like, or looks similar, guess what? When that doesn't heal,
that's another wounding that's very similar. So that wall, if you will, starts to grow stronger.
We'll now add a third one, if you can imagine, along to that. And each time those things are
not healed, that wall gets thicker. And that's where the strongholds, you know, that the Bible
talks about. That's how that stuff is formed in our lives. It's that habitual not dealing with
a problem and those wounds stay unhealed, unhealed, unhealed. And it becomes kind of callous, fortified,
if you will, and stronger and harder for us to overcome it. So we want to look at what, again,
what is the, what's an area where you're just like, man, this is just something I have a hard time
breaking free of in my mind. You know, some of you all even, and it's a real thing. Some of you
feel barren. You feel like you can't even attract someone to date a person. Well, there's something
going on underneath the surface that is not only in the physical realm that's manifesting,
but what in us is causing us to feel barren. What in us is causing us to partner with that
lie that we can't produce life in an area. God created us to produce life
in all different kinds of ways. And so we have to look underneath the surface because we,
we do care about every struggle that all of you all have in this community, but we have to be
willing to look at what's going on still underneath the surface. And it doesn't always mean that
you're doing something wrong. It means that there's brokenness and things that still need healing.
Okay. All right. We're going to keep going. So you want to look at the areas that are manifesting,
even immaturity in your emotions. Like we all have areas. I don't know if you all ever felt
like this. I'm, I'm in my high forties now, almost birthday and a month from now. I can't
believe it. But, you know, I remember in my low forties, even feeling like, man, I feel so not
40 years old in this area, just, you know, like different things because of family dynamics and
struggles I grew up with over the years, feeling like, man, I didn't really have a chance to grow
as a teenager, the way I should have in this area, or even in my twenties or thirties,
whatever that dynamic is. So I don't know if anyone else relates to that, maybe you're even
older than that. And you're just feeling like, man, I, I should be further along in this area.
I should feel more mature or grown up in this area. And I just want you to know, like at some
point we've all been there. The best thing that I did is I just prayed. I prayed and asked God to
help me grow and mature in wisdom and understanding and revelation in those areas and to heal. And all
of those things combined brought forth more life. And so when we have these immature areas, these
broken areas that are creating this havoc, we have our, our emotions are manifesting. And a lot
of times, not only is it fear that's manifesting, but over and over we hear shame, guilt, condemnation,
unworthiness. These are powerful emotions that can begin to lead to all types of painful behaviors
that we're going to call problems. So I want to see in the room, who has a problem in your life
right now? Just go ahead and raise your hand. Anyone have a problem in your life right now?
All right. So I'm not alone. We all have things that we're facing, but in all reality, some of you,
man, it might feel like that problem is unmovable. Like you can't move it. It feels like you just
can't get past it. And underneath of that problem for some of you are all of these painful behaviors
that I've been kind of sharing and talking about. And so we want to look at the problem,
but here's the thing we want to, I'm going to go ahead and lower hand so I can see you all again.
Thanks for joining in on that. We don't want to just look at what we think is the problem
because often what we think is the problem isn't actually really the problem.
Y'all have heard Jackie talk about that a lot. And so look at the problem. I encourage you,
if you have a piece of paper, write the problem down that you rose your hand for,
because I'm sure that's one of the things the Lord wants to help you work on tonight.
And if you have more than one, that's fine. Write them down and keep those so that you can kind of
process as the week goes on. But remember that the problem typically isn't the problem.
Here are some examples of problems that are stated frequently in the community. And there's
so many more, but I just put a couple down tonight. I have anxiety. I hate my job. I can't
find a good man. No one chooses me. God blesses everyone else but me. Okay. Those are a couple
that I'm hearing often. Again, there's no shame, guilt, or condemnation as I'm mentioning these.
You know, a lot of people are feeling this stuff, but I'm just saying it out loud so
that you can understand that those things are actually not your problem.
So maybe your problem is something different, but there's something else underneath the surface that
is really the problem. These things that I mentioned, these examples, and potentially
even the problems that you wrote down, these are just symptoms of what's really the problem.
So we're seeing the symptom on the surface. So what we're dealing with in the physical realm,
that is the symptom. But underneath the surface, I keep thinking of subcutaneous. Y'all, I'm not a
medical person, but for whatever reason, I keep hearing that in my spirit. But that's kind of,
you know, I think, isn't it underneath the layers of the skin? I don't know, the tissue. Y'all can
tell me what it is, but I keep hearing it, so I'm just going to speak it out. So some of you,
it's down in those kind of deeper layers that you can't see stuff. And so we have to really ask the
Lord, okay, I don't want to just deal with the symptoms. Lord, help me to get to the fruit. Let
me see the fruit. What's the unhealthy fruit that's being presented? So that why we can get to the
because the fruit, what we see in the world, what we see in our daily lives, you know, I'm going to
go through some of these fruits so that you can start to identify this stuff. But that's going
to help you start to get to the root of the matter. Okay, and I'm going to break this down more and
more as
as we go, but I'm just trying to lay some groundwork here.
Fruits are the emotional or physical manifestations
and the subsequent actions that we have been taking
as a result of what we believe in our hearts.
Okay, so the emotional and physical manifestation
and the subsequent actions.
So the things that we're doing
as a result of the emotions that we have
and the physical manifestation, again,
is something that's presenting.
It might be a pattern,
and then we're taking action on those things.
Again, I mentioned those triggers.
Here are some fruits, and there could be so much more,
and I am gonna give you all a long list.
This is from the book.
I felt led to read all of these to you because, again,
I want you to have some things that you're relating to
so that we can process and break free from those together.
Okay, so here are a list of some of the fruits.
Now, these are unhealthy fruits, okay?
I'm not gonna go into the positive fruits tonight
because we're trying to help you heal,
so I gotta focus on the things that are unhealthy.
All right, fruits may include sickness,
self-pity, a victim mentality,
despair, not sadness.
And a lot of times we'll pause on this one
because despair for me,
and you all might have a different understanding
or a way that you would describe this to people,
but it is that deep, deep grief
that people feel like they can't get out from under, okay?
Despair is way deeper than sadness.
So someone that feels deep grief on a regular basis,
that's a spirit of despair coming against you,
but that's typically rooted in, again,
something underneath the surface that needs healing.
All right, I'm gonna keep going.
Suicidal tendencies, disgust, judgment.
If you have a problem with judging other people,
it's because you have a fragmented heart.
A judgmental heart is a hurting heart.
Keep going.
Obesity, perversion, addiction of any kind,
any kind of addictions you all,
sexual dysfunction, hopelessness, hatred, self-hatred.
Remember that all forms of hatred begin with self-hatred.
So you can't hate somebody else
if we don't first hate ourselves.
And so we need to be willing to look at that.
If we're feeling hatred towards people,
there's something in us that needs healing.
Even if, and I'm gonna say this
because I just heard the Lord say,
even if someone hurt us,
that doesn't give us that kind of place to stand on
that we are justified in our hatred towards them.
We got to come out of all of that kind of stuff.
Additional fruits that are unhealthy,
abrasiveness, short temper, irritability,
jealousy, envy, competitiveness, comparing.
So are you struggling with comparing yourself
to other people?
Y'all I know, again, I just call things out
cause I know it's hard.
We hear this all the time.
Even with love stories, we have some people
that just are like, I can't come to love story
cause it just hurts me too bad
to hear how someone else is succeeding
or has gotten to marriage.
I don't want to not acknowledge the pain that you all feel.
Okay, because when you're waiting for the promise
or you're walking towards the promise for yourself
and it's not there yet.
Yeah, I felt things too.
I remember when one of my good friends,
she was getting married before I was,
and that was hard.
And I had to look at the jealousy
that was going on in my own heart.
I had to be willing to like,
well, what was the lie I was believing
that was feeding the jealousy?
Well, what it was is I was actually afraid
that I wasn't gonna have the same thing happen for me.
So we have people that are struggling
with comparing themselves.
When the posts go up and people are celebrating
their engagement or getting married,
that some of you are pulling away.
Let's be willing to look at that.
God doesn't want you to pull away from community.
He wants to minister to you in the pain that you feel
and help you not stay there,
but move beyond that into a place of healing
and truth and life.
All right, I'm gonna keep going.
Gossiping, backstabbing, being unhappy,
ungratefulness, selfishness, having a poverty mentality,
habitually being negative.
So do you have a propensity for negativity?
Is that your go-to?
If so, that isn't the way that God wants you to be.
He wants you to come out of that
into a different heart, posture, and mindset.
And I will say this too.
Retraining your brain takes work.
It takes intentionality.
So it's not gonna be a just,
hey, have a positive mind for one day.
We're not, any of these things as I go through this tonight,
we're not talking about
short-term behavior modification at all.
We want internal heart healing
that leads to long-term lasting change.
I have a couple more of the unhealthy fruits.
Maybe you're unfaithful.
Do you give your word to something?
not follow through?
Are you unfaithful in relationships?
Is there lack of trust with people with you?
In any way, maybe unfaithful even with money.
If unfaithfulness is showing up in any area of your life,
we need to be willing to look at that, any form of dis.
So disease, disconnection, discontent, disappointment.
If you have any of those things,
those are signals that you have a broken heart.
Does it mean we like, oh, I feel disappointment in one day
and that just means I have a broken heart?
Well, I don't know.
What's underneath of the disappointment?
Because I think a lot of times we dismiss this stuff.
Well, it's normal to feel disappointed.
Well, yeah, it probably does.
But do you stay disappointed?
Do you live in disappointment?
In a heart posture of disappointment
and these discontents and disconnection
and all of those things,
we have to be willing to look at all of this stuff
under the surface.
So what we often believe is the problem
is just the fruit of the real problem.
If we really want these areas of our lives
to become healthy and abundant,
remember, we wanna live the abundant life,
the good, good life, not just the good life,
but we believe that God in this community
wants to give all of you the good, good, abundant life
that you would have, you know, be filled up to overflowing,
that the goodness of God,
we talked about this on the women's prayer call
this morning, that the goodness of God,
that you would experience that
in the land of the living in every area of your life,
not just your love story, but every area of your life.
So we have to pull out these things at the root.
So when we look at the problems,
remember, we're gonna try to identify the lies
that are connected to them.
And then we're gonna try to get to the root of the problem.
The root of the problem is typically the first time
we encountered these dynamics and situations
and began to partner with them because we believed a lie.
From there, how do we locate the lie?
Well, we locate and isolate the lie, we believe,
when we see the core behavior.
So what's the core behavior?
Remember, we need the help of the Holy Spirit.
This isn't get out your shovels, ladies and gentlemen,
and try to dig it up again.
This is, hey, Holy Spirit, Lord, I need your help.
Help me to see what I can't see.
This is something I still pray all the time.
If there's something that I'm seeing
surfacing on a regular basis,
whether it's a mindset that's popping up in my head
or like I'm feeling upset quick or anything,
I'm trying to like, okay, Lord, show me what I can't see
because this thing that happened today,
that was, that reaction that I had,
that was bigger than I think it needed to be.
Does that make sense, everyone?
All right, Romans chapter seven, verse 15 and 19.
This is where Paul,
it's probably a familiar scripture for all of you.
I'm not reading the whole thing, just verse 15 and 19.
He says, I do not understand what I do.
For what I want to do, I do not do.
But what I hate, I do.
Verse 19, for I do not do the good I want to do,
but the evil I do not want to do.
This I keep on doing.
So I wanted to share those scriptures
because I want you all to see and be reminded
that Paul, who was used for mighty works,
he did great things for the Lord.
Even he struggled at times to do the things
that he didn't even want to do.
And so I don't want any of you to feel alone
or like, you know, that you're not good enough
or any of those things.
And if the enemy is saying any of that to you
and that's stuff that you believe,
then those are also areas where that's a revealing
for healing that's happening.
A lack of hope in our lives is another way
that we can identify a place where we are believing lies.
So as you all know, when you go through the heart work,
we have a supernatural hope session.
We try to help you do the hope scale and identify,
you know, where is your hope low?
Well, some of you, it's been a while
since you went through the heart work.
You may want to go back and revisit that hope scale
and take that afresh.
And let's take a look at, okay,
where is your hope scale at now?
Where are you low in hope?
Where are you high in hope?
You know, what's going on underneath the surface there?
If you don't believe anything will ever change,
if you have any area of your life
where you believe something will never change,
that means you've believed and accepted a lie.
So someone mentioned recently on one of our calls,
you know, the struggle when, you know,
they invited someone to come to something for their son
and nobody came.
And she, that broke her heart because, you know,
she didn't want her son to feel pain that she felt
when they didn't come for her to things too.
And y'all see this as a generational thing now,
but the enemy's trying to get her to believe a lie
that people aren't gonna show up for her in life.
but we have to choose to not partner with okay, maybe those people didn't show up,
but who might God want to place in our lives today, now going forward, that will show up for us?
But we have to make the shift, not just physically, but in our minds and our hearts first.
Does that make sense? All right. All right. So these are some of the hope-filled statements.
I wanted to give you some of these examples, and we're about to get ready for the heartwork
seats. So if anyone wants to go ahead and jump in that in a few minutes, go ahead and start to
raise your hands for me. All right. So these are some hope-filled statements that are often said
when we are lacking hope or we believe something will never change. Nothing good can ever happen
to me. I will never get married. I will always be broke. Maybe you're not saying I will always be
broke, but I will always struggle with money or whatever. Maybe I will always struggle with my
mom or I'll always struggle with my daughter. If y'all are having issues with kids, you know,
we just have to be careful about these always and never statements that are being made.
I am never going to be out of the pain for my health problems.
For some of you, you've struggled with health problems a really long time,
and I can't imagine what that's been like, but the enemy is trying to get you to partner with
that it's never going to change. And so I just want to encourage you to be really careful and
and do everything that you can, even if it means you just you not only yourself guard your heart
and mind, but get a really strong support system with people that you can have praying for you on
like a regular basis, an accountability team, if you will, so that you have people just like
when Moses's arms were being raised by Aaron, and I think it was her, correct me if I'm wrong,
I'm totally fine with that, but you know, they were raising his arms and when they were raising
his arms, he was winning the battle, they were winning the battle. And every time that they
would lower his arms, they wouldn't win the battle. So sometimes it takes other people to
be on our team with us to help us overcome those things. So if you have no hope for change or worse,
you see no need for change, because that's the other thing. How many of us stay in certain
like heart patterns, thought patterns, attitudes, and we just don't even see that we need to change.
There's an obstacle that's blocking you from being able to receive what God wants to give you
in that area of your life. And so I'm going to go ahead and open it up. Maddie, I saw your hand
up first. So if you want to share with us just a little bit about try to keep them short, brief,
and powerful you all so we can get as many people that want to go as possible. But tell us a little
bit about what is going on, and we'll try to unpack it from there. Hi, Bethany, thanks for
letting me get in the seat. I'm being very vulnerable here. Thank you. I've noticed in
the last few months since starting the heart work, I'm an excessive collector. And I jokingly say a
hoarder like the TV show hoarders. Now my friends and family don't say I'm not like that. But I
think that I'm like that, that I excessively feel like I won't have enough, don't have enough. And
it came to a head today, last day of school, cleaning up my classroom and noticing,
wow, I have a lot of extra of this laying around. I have a lot of extra of this laying around.
Why do I collect all these things? And the same with my eating disorders. I always feel like
I will never have enough. It's kind of like a scarcity mentality. Can I call it that?
Yeah, I think it started somewhere that could be connected to that. Let me ask you some questions
first. When is the first time that you remember starting to collect things a lot?
I've been married once. I started in that marriage. I started hoarding things.
Was there something happening at the time when you started doing that?
Emotional, physical, spiritual abuse.
Okay. Did either one of your parents do the same thing when you were younger?
No, exact opposite.
Okay. So tell me what that was like growing up. Tell me what exact opposite means to you.
We don't know.
Didn't buy things, we had the bare minimum.
So were you afraid as a kid that you wouldn't have enough?
Did you ever not be able to eat food
or did you ever have times
where you didn't have something you needed?
There was a lot of jealousy of friends.
They had the good things and the cool things
and the nice things that my brothers and I didn't have.
Okay.
And when you were married
and you were going through the emotional abuse
and the other abuses that you mentioned,
what were some of the lies you were believing at that time
that led you to start buying things excessively?
Thinking that it would be enough.
And that was also the comparison
from my husband at the time,
well, so-and-so has this,
or have you thought about this?
And then it just became a buying pattern of,
okay, if I buy this, it'll make him happy.
Okay.
All right.
So I keep hearing filling the void,
which I know that probably sounds like so simplistic,
but it sounds like in a time of distress,
you were starting to try to fill the void,
the void that wasn't being met in the relationship.
And I believe it triggered things from when you were a kid.
So while you all,
like you said, you had the bare minimum as a kid,
well, a lot of times when we go through
that kind of stress as a kid,
it can kind of flip and be opposite,
where then we're just always buying, buying, buying
so that we don't ever have to fear not having enough.
Does that make sense?
Right.
Okay.
So I just want to encourage you like to start tracking this.
Like when you feel led to buy something that you don't need,
that you will start tracking that and pay attention.
Okay, am I feeling stress?
Is this a habit that I'm just following through on
right now, or is there a lie I'm believing
that's leading me to purchase?
Because it might just be a habit now
that you've been doing it so long.
And so we just need to retrain that habit potentially.
But if this is something you're doing
when you're feeling sad or lonely
to fill that void of loneliness,
then that's another connector to the same thing
that you potentially were experiencing
in the marriage before.
Okay.
All right.
So I want you just for the next,
even try for two weeks just to track
when those urges to buy come up.
And track what has been going on that day.
How are you feeling?
And then come in and put a post
preferably in the Facebook group.
I tend to see those easier and quicker
if you can do it in there.
Okay.
Yeah, and you can just tag me in it and I'll see it.
And then we'll probably unpack it more from there.
Cause I feel like this will be a little bit revealing
to you as you're tracking when that's showing up for you.
Okay, very good.
Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Stephanie, go ahead.
Yeah, thanks for sharing.
Okay, so I have just been noticing
like this fear of what other people think,
fear of criticism.
And I know it's been a thing for a long time.
And I feel like I've gotten to the place
where I'm not letting it hold me back.
Like God has been calling me to do things
that are like out of my comfort zone
and I'm able to do them.
But then I feel like there's like all this backlash
of like anxiety and just like going back
through the conversation or,
and I'm pretty sure I know where it comes from.
Like growing up, I feel like my mom was pretty critical
and like this lie that like people don't like me,
like I know that comes up.
And so I've been trying to like,
you know, rebuke that and all that,
but it just, I feel like I just,
I'm having trouble getting to the root
and I'm noticing it like on the apps,
if I see someone who I'm interested in,
like sometimes, well, not sometimes,
a lot of times I'll like talk myself out of it
and be like, oh, this person wouldn't be interested in me
or...
So basically sidelining yourself
before you even got in the game there.
Yes.
Okay.
Okay, so I know you're saying
that you're not sure the root of it,
people don't like me feels like a core to me.
Like even though the thing with your mom seems significant,
like, do you remember at all, like when the first time,
like even as a kid,
do you remember when you've like felt that lie
or felt that experience of like,
oh my gosh, they don't like me?
I do remember at some point feeling
like my mom didn't like me.
Um, other than that, like,
I don't know if I've, I felt like other people didn't.
Okay.
That's good.
So when you're put,
when you're sidelining yourself then with these guys,
like what is your first thought
that they would never pick you?
Like what's going on in your mind when that happens?
Yeah. Like almost this, like I'm not good enough.
Yeah. Like they,
they wouldn't choose me or like,
maybe once they get to know me, they would,
but like initially they won't,
or I don't have enough to offer or something like that.
Yeah. That's, that's okay.
So I think since you're saying really, I mean,
the root seems to be starting with mom
and mom not thinking you're enough.
You were feeling like mom didn't like you.
And now that's still translating through
when you're showing up, when you're saying you're,
you know, doing your best to get out of your comfort zone
and then you feel backlash of anxiety.
Is it with a certain group of people,
a certain gender of person,
or does that just show up typically with everyone
when you step out of your comfort zone?
Yeah. I think it's just generally with everyone.
Like, yeah, it could be coworkers.
It could be new friends or acquaintances.
It's like, I've gotten to the place where I can
feel confident and be bold and do it.
And then it's like afterwards, it's like all the.
Have you ever done this silhouette activation?
I think I mentioned it on the last advanced heart work.
I gave that to someone else to do.
Okay.
I've really started.
We've kind of mentioned it in heart work in the past,
but we do it in a whole different way now.
So basically, and this can be for anybody else on here,
if this is resonating for you.
And the reason I'm going to mention this to you, Stephanie,
is I feel like there's core identity that needs healing,
like core inner identity stuff.
So knowing who you are in Christ in such a way
that it would supersede any lie of the enemy
that came through your mom or anyone else.
Because knowing your value and knowing what you offer,
I mean, the little bit I know of you,
I think you're pretty incredible.
And any man would be really blessed to have you in his life
and have you be his wife.
And so the trick though,
is that you don't believe that right now.
And so that's pointing to a value issue.
You don't believe your value and worth is what it is.
And so we have to go back to,
okay, Lord, help me to see what I can't see
regarding my value.
Like why do I sell myself short
and count myself out before I even like
try to talk to this guy?
Because you know what?
Some of those guys might be like
super excited to talk to you,
but you're just not giving them a chance
because you're telling yourself,
again, that subconscious lies coming up,
saying, hey, no, he's not going to pick you.
But this is, excuse me, this is the silhouette activation.
I ask people to draw kind of like a silhouette outline.
It doesn't have to be super artsy,
but literally of themselves.
We've had people do it in creative ways too.
So some people do it just with, you know,
computer, a picture of themselves.
You can do it however you want,
whatever helps you just to get it done.
But this is what you would do.
You're going to ask the Lord
to show you what he says about you.
Like, what does God want to tell you today
about who you are?
And then write down any words, phrases,
thoughts that come to you if they are positive.
If they are negative, they don't go on there.
Those go on another sheet of paper,
and you'll write out the negative thought
or phrase or whatever it is,
and you'll cross that out and ask the Lord
to give you the truth to replace the lie.
And sometimes you might have to do that a couple times
because you might hear multiple negative things, okay?
But only positive things go on that silhouette activation.
And it's really like, who does God say I am?
Like, God, who do you say that I am?
You know, who does God say you are
when I would even go to this level, Stephanie?
God, who do you say I am when I get on the dating apps?
Like, help me to see what you see.
so that you can go to that extra layer of hearing what he thinks about you
and the blessing that he thinks that you
are to whoever has an opportunity to get to know you. Does that make sense?
Then I'd love, if you're willing, post that in the group.
Anybody I give homework to,
post that in the group.
Again, if you put it in the Facebook group,
it's just easier for me to see the notifications in there versus our app.
It takes me a little longer to see them in there.
Thank you so much.
You're welcome. Thank you for sharing. Sophie, go ahead.
Hey, Bethany. Thanks for letting me take a turn.
Yeah, absolutely.
I feel like what I've been experiencing is,
there you are, I'm trying to find you.
Whenever I date and I get pressure,
I freak out and I have a hard time communicating my truth.
I find that I do that with my children as well.
I really struggle disappointing them.
But I can't say with the last conversation that you just had,
I feel like that core identity just resonated with me.
Yeah.
You want to go back and revisit that.
I know that you did that activation when you came through HeartWork.
I vaguely remember when you came through as far as,
I think you definitely did one,
but you may want to go back and revisit that and put that up.
But it wouldn't hurt to,
even if you did it before,
to do it fresh if you need to.
But one of the other things,
when you were saying that,
I want you to tell me what are your truths?
Tell me a couple of those.
Well, my truths are that I want to meet somebody that's faith-based,
that honors God,
and me also.
I feel like probably one of the feelings
are that that's going to be impossible to find,
somebody that's actually that selfless,
that really feels that way.
Kind of back to,
let me look at which one.
I can't find a good man.
Yeah. That's going to listen to me and acknowledge what my needs are.
Okay.
I keep running into that where they want more,
they want to move a lot faster.
Maybe it's just you haven't found them yet.
Maybe, but I get very anxious.
If I get any pressure like that,
I get very nervous and maybe that is just a thing.
Yeah. I think it's just you need to solidify more.
When you say you get pressure,
tell me what that means to you.
If somebody just starts saying,
oh yeah, I want to get together,
I want to see you all weekend, every weekend.
We're going to spend all this time together.
I get pretty nervous because that's not going to work for me
unless we have a pretty commitment with one another.
I'm sorry, my dogs are barking.
That's okay.
But anyway, I get very nervous about it.
Tell me with your kids because you brought your kids into that too.
You said you have a hard time communicating your truth to your kids.
What does that look like and sound like with your kids?
Okay. I guess a good example would be my daughter is living here right now.
She just got married.
They are pregnant or she's pregnant and they're going to have a baby.
They moved from another state back home,
so they're with me for a little while and I wanted to help them out.
But I don't have a lot of space,
so I was thinking about maybe finishing the basement.
I got a quote and it's too much money.
I felt really bad that I would have to disappoint them and say no.
I don't want to see her.
It's almost like this belief that they can't handle their own pain.
That probably is something that is definitely a belief that I've had since I was young,
because my parents were deaf and they left all the really heavy responsibilities on us.
Um, so do you feel like, cause even with the guys, when you were explaining that I wrote
down the word boundaries, I think, and even what you're saying with regarding your daughter,
it sounds like, you know, there's boundaries that need to be set there, you know?
And at the core, now you're starting to share some of the things with your parents.
It makes sense that that is something that you struggle with because as a young kid or
young teen or whenever that was happening, um, maybe boundaries were crossed, um, and
responsibility was potentially put on you that was beyond your age.
And so when that happens, a lot of times people as adults will struggle to define what boundaries
are, or even if they do, they will feel very guilty for doing so.
You know, the fact that you said, I don't want to disappoint them.
Like that's a key word right there that that's a signal saying, okay, there's some heart
healing that needs to happen here too, because you know, maybe defining, even redefining
with your daughter, what does healthy look like in our relationship?
You know, while you're living here, you know, what's the goal moving forward?
You know, because I think so many times, so many parents and you know, I know even my
heart, if my girls asked me, we would let them live here, but we've even talked about,
well, what would the boundaries be if that ever happened?
Because we want to establish those before they move in, you know, so just knowing that
you're struggling in those areas, you may want to go back and kind of revisit the boundaries
and do some more, uh, boundaries work specifically where your voice, uh, you realize that it
matters.
And even if someone gets disappointed, if you will, that it's okay for that tension
in that, that, that feeling to be there, it doesn't mean you don't love them and it shouldn't
mean that they don't love you.
It's just, you're stating what is healthy for you.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
I think just giving yourself permission to look at, okay, where over the years have you
taken responsibility on yourself that, that you're not, that you're not meant to carry.
And then with these guys, I think the biggest thing is just practicing boundary setting,
especially with what you've explained to me, it's like a muscle you have to develop, you
know?
And so it's okay for you to say to a guy, even if he's wanting to come all weekend and
you're just getting to know him, Hey, you know what?
I would really enjoy getting to know you on Saturday from this time to this time.
You don't have to turn him down.
You don't have to say, come out and be like, no, but you can say what your boundary is.
And if he keeps pushing and pushing on that, then, Hey, that's a flag.
Yeah.
But you practicing saying what you're comfortable with is going to be really important right
now.
Yeah.
That makes a lot of sense to just look at those boundaries because the boundaries, keeping
boundaries was such a fearful thing to do growing up.
So I will do that.
I will practice that.
Thank you for letting me process that out.
You're welcome.
Y'all, this is really important.
It's always helpful when someone else can just talk us through something, right.
And we can have somebody else's perspective and, and kind of even connecting dots that
maybe we don't see yet.
So Sophie, thank you for sharing with us and being willing to do that.
I asked really quick, do you, it's not like I have to sit there and trying to find a lot
This is more working on the boundaries.
I think the lie would be connected to the responsibility you took on yourself as a kid.
Okay.
Yeah.
I do think there's some lies probably lying under the surface there regarding all of that.
And because of those lies that you believed or received back then, even though there might
not have been a way out of that situation, it's the trauma and the wounds that we experience
when we're going through that, that those lies come in.
Okay.
So a lie could look like, or sound like, I'm just going to, I don't know for you, but like,
I just know from people I've coached in that situation, they feel like their life doesn't
matter or their voice doesn't matter.
And those lies feed into other lies.
And those, that kind of filters all the way into the boundary issues and all of that.
Okay.
So just working on the boundaries will flush that out.
It could.
I'm not saying it will.
I think you need to look at that, the core stuff with your parents, that maybe where
you're still carrying responsibility, because it sounds like you're carrying responsibility
on yourself regarding your daughter and her happiness and her not being disappointed,
like worrying about her feelings.
past a level that might be healthy for you.
Okay.
Does that make sense?
Yes.
Yep.
Okay.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Margaret, go ahead.
Thanks, Bethany.
So, can you guys hear me?
Yep.
Okay.
So, kind of in alignment with what Stephanie was saying, but something that you said kind
of hit me, and that's why I raised my hand, no one will come.
No one will show up.
I have been doing a lot of really intense, deep hard work as far as my identity, and
there is something...
It must be super freaking deep, because I feel like I have peeled layers and layers
and layers.
But the thing that...
It's keeping me from being able to step out with my business and invite people, do these
little mini retreat type things that I want to do, to actually announce that my business
has started.
I haven't done it.
I keep procrastinating all these different things, and so I'm not stepping out into the
thing that I know that the Lord is calling me to do.
And so, I don't know what the lie is.
I don't have a memory that I recall where people didn't show up.
The only thing that I could think of that came to mind as you were sharing with Stephanie
was field day, when I was a little girl, not getting any ribbons, because I sucked at everything.
I couldn't do it all.
And my mom pretty much hated my guts from birth, so I don't really know.
I felt like I've worked through that.
I felt like I've forgiven her.
I've walked through a lot of identity stuff, so I don't know.
I don't know where it stems from, but I just...
Yeah.
Do you feel like you show up for yourself?
You're saying that...
Can you define what that means?
Well, you're saying...
So, for example, one of the things the Lord has shown me in the last year is that a lot
of times I will do things for everyone else, for other people, but my things get put on
the back burner.
I lost you on my screen.
Okay, I got it.
I found you.
And so, when we're putting ourselves off, we're putting off the things that God is leading
us to do, and we're taking care of other needs, or all these other things are taking up our
time, or our space, or our mind, and procrastination, if you remember, is a self-preservation technique.
We do that to self-preserve, so what is it that we're self-preserving ourselves from?
Well, what if...
I was thinking when I said to you, do you show up for yourself?
Because you said, no one will come, no one will show up for me, or no one will show up,
and you're saying...
Yeah, there's a fear there.
Yeah.
But inside of you...
Yeah, the fear is there.
Yeah, inside of yourself, are you fully showing up for yourself, and saying like, hey, I can
do this, no matter if anybody else thinks I can do this, I'm going to walk this out,
and I'm going to see this through, and taking the steps to begin it.
So to me, looking at the lies that you might be believing that are causing you from moving
forward might also lead to revealing ways that you struggle to show up for yourself.
So for example, if you start to move forward and all of a sudden you feel tension and pain
because you have to change something that you're doing to go where God is leading you
to go, so maybe it's time and space that you got to make for that thing, maybe it's a discipline,
maybe it's whatever, something.
But if that tension starts to happen and we feel that pressure and we pull away from that
and procrastinate instead, well, what's the lie we're believing when we pull away from
that tension?
Do you understand?
Yeah, I do.
I feel like from my perspective, I'm taking steps in some areas.
I'm stepping out, I'm doing things, I'm being authentic, I'm being real.
I feel like I'm showing up for myself.
But at the same time, when you ask that question, something, I don't know if Holy Spirit kind
of poked me a little bit, because I think that my home is on the back burner.
What does that mean for you?
The stuff around my home, everything seems to be falling apart around me, like in my
home, like organization, order, structure, some sort of form of maybe discipline.
disciplined structure, calendar. I have two things that I do consistently. Everything else just is
willy-nilly. Okay. So maybe getting to the root of that even. So when I hear that, I also think of
like, when's the first time where, you know, sometimes people will say, well, that's just
how I am. You know, like some people will just say, well, that's just my personality. And sometimes
that can be true, but sometimes that can also be a crutch for us to not clean our homes or not
organize or not, you know, show up on time or whatever the thing is that we struggle with.
And so we really need to look at, okay, well, is that really just how we are? Or is that a learned
behavior that actually is a symptom of something that, you know, is under the surface? Like, when
did we start being willy-nilly? Kind of, that was your verbiage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I hear you.
I hear you. If I go back in time, I look at my childhood when my dad and my mom separated,
I mean, divorced. It was the best thing that could have ever happened to me because I had
some freedom. But when I would go to my dad's for a week and come back to the house, my room was
completely turned into a hotel room. All of my stuffed animals, everything was pulled off the
off the walls, thrown into the closet. So my room looked like a hotel room. I had to put my posters
back up, get all my stuffies out of the closet, put everything together because I couldn't because
I think my mom had OCD. I realized that after the fact, but in a time I didn't understand.
I just felt like she just, nothing I did was right. So I realized that I do like structure. I
do like order. I like things organized and structured. If you looked at my drawers, when you
pull my drawers, the drawers open, everything's organized. But outside of those drawers, for some
reason, you know, where it's not hidden, it's absolute chaos. So I don't know like, you know,
what that means. I don't even know what that means. So I think what we can do is just, you just
got to keep praying into it. I know that's not an easy answer. And asking the Lord to reveal like,
what is leading you to avoid organizing your space? You know, because it sounds to me,
I even hear you right now saying, I like structure, I like order, but yet you're allowing yourself to
almost ignore it from what you're saying. And then that's weighing on you in other areas.
And so it kind of feels like it kind of feels almost like in your face, almost like I like,
want to like, like, spite my mom or something, even though she's passed away. It's like this
weird, like, I can have my space anyway. I want to have my freaking space, you know,
kind of thing. Like, I don't know. I feel like that might be something going on there.
I definitely think because as soon as you started telling the story about your mom,
and how like, you would be gone at visiting your dad, and then you'd come home and all your stuff
was no longer where it was. I mean, that's definitely when a control like for on your
side of things, trying to regain control would come back in. And, you know, again, these are
things that when we don't deal with them, because we probably don't even know how when we're kids,
most of us, because we don't have the brain or emotional capacity to do so. I mean, that would
be really hurtful, right? When we come home and mom has, you know, and who knows what's going on
with mom. I remember the first time when my dad got remarried, I came home, my mom was just like,
and again, rightfully so broken and hurt, but she took it out on us kids. And, and it was just a
horrible day. But I remember at one point looking out and seeing her sitting out under these trees,
just crying. And I just remember how hard that was for me. And I knew how hurt she was, but I
didn't know what to do with that. And I didn't have any other adults there to help me process
that. And so that was something that I struggled with for quite some time. And so I would say,
yes, even though you've done a lot of work, Margaret, and healing, I would just be asking
the Lord this week about that situation with your mom, you may need to forgive your mom for doing
that. Again, even if you already have, it sounds like this is coming up again. But also I feel like,
even if you just write out on a piece of paper, I, Margaret, like structure, I, Margaret, like order,
and I can organize my home. Like, I know that sounds simple, but where you see it in every day,
not just see it, but like one thing a day, just one little thing a day,
try to organize something. Or if that's too
much than a couple times a week where you're just taking little bites instead of avoiding.
And really you all, I mean, I like this is like heartwork stuff combined with other action,
but the reality is, is we partner with God and we go, we take action and we start doing,
it's the same thing to move towards our spirit mate. Waiting isn't sitting there literally
waiting for God to put them in our laps. It's actively preparing and doing things.
Same thing in these kinds of situations and dynamics in our lives. Margaret, that was so
great. I'm going to go ahead and go on to the next person. But come back and let us know how that's
going after you're kind of trying to put that in practice and pray into that a little bit more.
Thank you so much. Anya, go ahead. Hey. Hi. So I've been
kind of just dealing with some stuff with work. So I'm in full-time ministry, but it's interesting
because when I had posted in the group a few weeks back or whatever about a different issue
and you had recommended revisiting the soul ties. So I was able to do that earlier this week
or last week, anyway. And what's interesting is that I, when Jackie was listed different
things you can be tied to that the community one actually really stood out to me this time. So
I think there was some revealing for healing with the thing that I'd posted about, but also
it felt like another piece of what the Lord's been kind of speaking to me. And I'm just kind of
trying to navigate it all. I've been feeling like there needs to be a shift for quite a while
in regards to what I do, not leaving ministry as a whole. Like I still really feel like that's my
calling, but I'm just really exhausted. And it's been a lot of like what I first came to that
ministry to do is not what I'm doing. And primarily I'm doing a lot of administrative work.
I've kind of come to terms with that over the last couple of years where I, instead of fighting it so
hard, I'm like, you know what? The reality is it's actually a spiritual gift that I do have. So it's
a legitimate thing that is helping to serve the ministry, but it's not the thing that makes my
heart come alive. And I think there's probably a lot more layers. We've been through some pretty
big things, a couple of big things in our ministry that kind of created upheaval and
trauma and having to walk through all of that. But when Jackie was doing all of the teachings
on pruning and we did the activation call specifically, I heard work. And so I've just
been trying to like pray through all of that and figure out what that means, whether that's
within my role, like pruning some of the things or if that's like fully done or if it's partly done.
Let me ask you a question. Tell us, what does make your heart come alive? Tell us what that is.
What's interesting is I feel like that's been harder to answer in these last couple of years.
It's been a while since, it's not that there's not things at times, but it's been a while.
So even in the past, what's something that really like you felt that connection
and just alive and vibrant? Well, that would be worship leading for sure for me,
singing, playing, just singing to Jesus, but getting the lead people in it.
Um, yeah, that would be in terms of ministry, that would be like the thing.
I've just found that I haven't had a lot of life and joy even in that over the last few years. So
in doing ministry, you haven't had as much joy either. Is that what you're saying?
Yeah, there's sometimes, but it's not like even sometimes leading worship. Now I'm just like,
I think I'm just so tired that. Yeah, that's okay. So let me, let me ask you this.
What if you gave yourself permission just to take a break and do something else for a little while?
I, yeah, I just am like, I don't know. I don't feel like I know how to do that. Like it,
um, I literally moved my whole life here. Feeling like this is what I was called to. And so it's,
yeah, it's just like, what would I do? You know? Yeah. But tell me this, like,
and I'm just, cause I can sense some emotion coming up for you. And this may not be true,
but I just feel led to ask you, do you feel like you would be letting God down if you just
didn't do that for a little while?
Like what's feeding the emotional, like that fear of changing what you're doing?
The unknown, I think more than anything.
Oh, fear, basically, underneath of the unknown?
Yeah.
Okay.
So what if you gave yourself permission to even just create, it doesn't have to be as
elaborate as the vision boards that we did at the beginning of the year, but just do
a vision board around like, what would your ideal job look like and feel like and allow
your, because it sounds like you don't, like you've kind of numbed.
And I actually wrote down depression and I'm not saying you're depressed, but I did write
it down because when we are doing things that we used to love and we don't feel like we
love it anymore, there can be some grief potentially or depression there.
So I'm not speaking that over you, but I just want you to be willing to look at that.
That there may be some hurt that's unresolved that you went through in ministry or feeling
like what you really desired had to get put on the back burner for something else, what
else came up in my spirit.
So I feel like those might be kind of tied together underlying there, but also the vision
board.
Like when I say this, like, you know, it can be pictures of like something that feels alive.
When you look at it, you don't even have to explain it on you.
You don't have to describe it to anybody.
But if that, when you look at it and you're like, man, that makes me feel happy.
That makes me feel, you know, alive or whatever the word is descriptor for you, that you would
put that on the board and you would start to like, kind of define a little bit.
Like what would that feel like in the future for you to have something that you really,
you know, like, Hey, this is what I believe that I would love to do now in the meantime.
Sometimes even just being in ministry and leading ministers outside of last year, single
my husband and I, you know, pastor church here in Florida.
One of the things that I have found of the years of being in ministry is that sometimes
people get burnout and they need a break.
And taking that break from ministry is the best thing that they've ever done.
Because it gave them time to recharge, recalibrate is a word that comes to mind and really recenter
and like, Hey, like, well, guess what?
Like the season that I was in before and what God called me to doesn't mean that has to
be what he's called me to my entire life.
And even if worship leading is what brings you deep joy and happiness.
You're saying that doing that right now, isn't doing that anymore.
And so is it just healing that needs to happen?
Or is there a shift that God's trying to bring you to?
Because he has something better for you.
But if I know, like, I mean, I want you to know, I understand what it's like to move
your life to a completely different place.
I've done it now.
I said, I wasn't going to move for my spirit mate.
And then I did because God led me to, and then I moved there.
And then two years later, God moved us to Florida.
I know what it feels like to move your whole life.
It is tricky.
And there's a lot of emotions and all kinds of new friends and new things.
But this is the thing.
If we can look at not what we fear, but what the good that could be.
A lot of times we can shift and make that decision a lot easier versus, oh my gosh,
I won't have this.
And, you know, then this person might be upset with me or whatever it is, again, those what
ifs and fears that keep us from shifting into the new thing.
Yeah.
That makes sense.
Yeah.
So I'm going to say like a shift, like, I mean, I think part of it is a spirit mate,
not that there's anything yet on the, but just like coming.
Part of that is to like trying to navigate how to move towards it, I guess.
Yeah.
And hey, guess what?
If God is nudging you to shift, that shift might be a part of that too.
And you don't have to be afraid that you're going to miss your spirit mate.
God's going to lead you to them.
So just walk and do what God's asking you to do and trust that he's going to bring you
and your spirit mate together in that process, whether it's during that process or after
the move or shift or whatever, but God knows what he's, he knows what he's doing.
I promise.
If I can surrender, all of y'all can surrender.
So I'm passing that tag, you're it, I pass it on to all of you.
And whatever that looks like, not that everybody has to move by any means, but I'm just trying
to be a little lighter, bring the mood up a little bit.
But yeah.
Yeah, we look forward to hearing how that goes for you, Anya.
And we're going to be praying for you as you start to step
into, you know, just the next step.
So right now you don't have to worry about moving.
All I would encourage you to do right now is do that board and
start dreaming a little bit, pray about, is there an area that
I'm grieving, you know, and just be kind of knocking on the door
with the Lord a little bit and asking, maybe look at what area
would you love to live?
Hey, let's just consider that.
Because I know you're saying you feel God led you there for the
ministry, but maybe God in this season is saying, Hey, you get
to choose where you live.
And is there somewhere that you've always dreamed of living
that you don't right now?
Okay.
All right, I'm sowing seeds.
You don't have to pick them up, but whoever wants to can have
them and run with them.
They can be really good.
Thank you for sharing with us, Susan Bennett.
Go ahead.
Am I unmuted?
Okay, ma'am.
Hi there.
I'm not going to show, I'm not on a walk, so I'm not going to
show you my face.
Okay.
Hi.
Uh, all right.
For starters, I realized how much of a avoided attachment that I am.
And, um, I find it so interesting when talking to men, uh, when they
start doing this, hello, beautiful.
Um, they started using all this flowery language and I just want to
roll my eyes and say, stop it.
You don't know me.
Stop it.
And I want to, um, I really, you know, I just don't like it.
I want to cut and run.
I don't, I don't want to go through the process of helping
them see what they're doing.
Um, do you believe you're beautiful?
Yes.
Okay.
So can a guy see your picture and think you're beautiful?
Yes, but he doesn't need to text me.
Hello.
Beautiful.
Are you saying that's his initial text to you?
Um, it's been, it's been very frequent this week with a particular man.
And I just roll my eyes.
Okay.
Well, is that someone you just want to pass on and, and, and just move on?
Well, I'm, I'm, you know, we're heavily considering that, um, it's these, and I
had another encounter with someone like this, um, on December 28th, just, Hey,
you know, I love you.
Like, no, you don't know, but I, you, I can love you like a sister.
You know, I, I just love people.
It sounds like you're actually recognizing, um, healthy versus unhealthy.
I think it's totally fine.
And I remember, you know, some people saying that stuff to me too, in initial
messages, and I just didn't actually talk to them for very long.
I, I wanted real conversation and I was looking for that.
So I will say that Brian said something very nice to me.
He did compliment me and did tell me that I was beautiful in his first message to me.
And, but he also said something else that was very meaningful.
So I want you to be careful to not just dismiss something because someone's
complimenting you when they don't know you yet, because sometimes people don't
even know how to open the door to a conversation, but if that's the only
thing that they're saying over and over, and there's not a depth of conversation,
then yeah, maybe just allow yourself and give yourself permission to move on.
Um, you know, someone telling you that they love you when you don't even know them.
Yeah.
That's a, that's a lot.
Um, yeah, yeah.
But I w I would, I would maybe not go so hard on the, Hey, if they say that
you're beautiful when they first get to know you, that that's a bad thing.
Um, so just kind of have a balance there versus just being a hard line on that.
Well, yeah, I agree with your face to face and you're, you know,
they're like, Oh my gosh.
You know, well, face to face, he sent that to me via text.
I'm just saying the guy, and I'm so glad it actually, his compliment was genuine
and kind, and like I said, he said some other thing, like we were that developed
the conversation, I'm just trying to say like a hard line that if somebody says
that to you in a first message, that that's, that's, you don't even want to
talk to them, that might be too hard of a line and I would look at that.
Like I would look at, again, I think there's a balance there.
But I would look at why does that aggravate you so much?
Well, I think what aggravates me is you don't know me.
I understand a compliment.
I've been complimented by just men walking down the street
and it's nothing creepy,
but I'm discerning the difference.
And it's just very off-putting.
I know a good compliment when I hear one.
I know a creepy one where it's way too suggestive.
Oh my gosh.
So the one thing I did write down though,
I think there's a difference between,
and I'm not saying this isn't you,
I'm just saying for anybody that's on here tonight,
I think, or that watches the replay,
there's a difference between getting a compliment
and receiving a compliment.
And I think so many people have their walls up.
And again, it sounds like some of these guys
might be in the unhealthy side of things.
So I think you're discerning well,
but I think that just kind of the way that you're like,
well, they don't know me.
Why would they say this?
I think that feels like too hard of a line.
And so I think we've got to be willing to really look at,
can we receive a compliment?
And if we struggle to receive a compliment genuinely,
where we don't think that the guy has ulterior motives,
then there's probably something that needs healing there.
Yeah.
All right.
Yeah.
So I would look at that a little bit,
just be willing to see if there's something there
the enemy's trying to cause frustration
or just maybe a generalization towards men
that might be kind of popping its head up there
with that happening.
Well, yeah, they definitely don't want to go
in that generalization of men
because some men are noble and honorable and yay.
Yes.
And some men are-
Are not.
Complimentary and kind,
and that's what they're going to lead with.
And so they might lead with a compliment first,
they might, and they might be really genuine.
So just make sure, again,
just keep your discernment hat on.
It sounds like you have it,
but just keep discerning and be open
to receiving a compliment when it's genuine.
Yeah.
Yes, ma'am.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Hunter, go ahead.
Basically things are changing.
I told Hoppy about how am I going to approach stuff
right now?
All these years I've been trying to go out
and make it happen and try to think of,
oh, they must not like me
or because there's always a better guy
or I need to make it happen,
but really it's just idolizing them,
but really it's just, or lowering my boundaries
and it never happens because I stay in the church.
I mean, I didn't get married
like the rest of everybody in the church.
So if it's not happening, it's going to walk out,
but I didn't, I didn't give up.
So basically it's all me worshiping them,
but now I'm going to change this hard work,
but instead I'm going to,
I think it's going to be a matter of what would she like?
For example, I think you just want to approach her
because she wants to be in a better mood
rather than you just ask him questions multiple times
just for the sake of keeping the conversation going.
And also I'm just not the guy I was.
Yes.
Oh, go ahead Hunter.
And I was, I'm not, I'm just saying,
I'm not the guy I was.
Basically I wanted to have things my way,
have the relationship I wanted at young
and grow old together and live with, have family as well.
But the thing is the more I got older,
the more I said, it's not going to happen.
So I figured I don't want to be,
the whole point of me getting a relationship
is because there's something good in it for me
and it can fit into my lifestyle.
But the thing is I grew up with these,
it's all about when I left high school
and I have all these ambitions that I have
because it started 20 when I figured,
you know what, you start young,
now you got to make it count.
Now you guys-
Oh Hunter, sorry.
Let me ask you a question.
So when you are afraid that it's not going to happen,
what's feeding that fear for you?
Losing.
Basically you've lost or you didn't mount it quick enough.
Look at everyone, look at everyone else,
look how ahead they are.
It's like you're falling behind in the race
to get ahead in life.
Like you have to have your, be independent,
get a job and have your place all set
and even use your money wisely.
So, and it's something bad.
Yeah.
So what's an area that you are winning right now?
Tell me something that's going well for you.
Finances.
I'm able to, last year, after I came back from Israel,
I had a seasonal job.
I had to throw away money into life savings,
into the thousands, I'll say it.
But, and then after it was seasonal,
so I was falling back to my emergency savings.
to live off of. I had unemployment but I didn't live off of unemployment. I was able to get
my first job without a job coach and I went to Indeed and applied for Amazon. It was my
first time applying all on my own with no help and I had to pass those jobs that require
you to pass a written test to see if you have common sense. It's basically a job that requires
skill and since then I was able to replenish, I was able to build skill at Amazon and put
money into savings. I made a goal last year that I would not just save money, I would
organize my savings for in case I run into a situation, checkings, and look at what happened
this year. Our church was going to have an overseas trip to Greece and walk in a footstep
to St. Paul. So I said, you know what, I'm going to go. I have money put away for it
and then I have organized emergency savings in case I have checking. I have $1,000 over
my checking, over budget, just in case I need, just for necessities. Emergency savings
I put organized in case I run out of a job or in case I have something to pay up or in
case I don't go broke.
So did you go to Greece?
No, yeah, I'm going to go this fall.
Oh, that's awesome.
And then I have the singles cruise too. I'm just going to go big.
I like it. Saving your money. So here, I'm going to have you focus on something because
one of the things I want you to work on, Hunter, is because of the fear of losing that
you have faced before, and then that came up again for you tonight, I want you to make
a list of the areas that you win and the growth that you've made. And so like even on a piece
of paper tonight, I want you just to write down two or three things that you have accomplished
and done well. You just told us the finances. You also told us that you built new skills
through working at Amazon. You're saving for these trips. And so just putting that
up where you can see it and reminding yourself, hey, you know what? I win. I'm not a loser.
I don't lose in life. I'm winning. I'm making good choices. And then that can help equip
you to make more good choices as you keep moving forward, even in relationship. And
so just want to encourage you to do that here in the near future. Tonight would be great
or tomorrow where you make that list for yourself and just partner with, and this is
for everyone, like how can you, and I said this all to you all earlier, how can you partner
with the wins that you're already accomplishing? How can you celebrate, you know, the strides
that you've made? I know some of you have felt like you've had some setbacks recently,
but even in the setback, what did God teach you in the middle of that? What is God trying
to show you about yourself? And even like, as several people tonight have shared, identity
being at the core, like God's trying to grow us in our identity in Christ. He's trying
to grow us in our understanding of who we are in every situation in Him, no matter what
comes, no matter if that connection that you have on that dating app works out or not.
God is trying to solidify who are you, who are you really, you know, that, that like,
who are we really, when all these other things are taken away, like, you know, we have our
jobs and, you know, people that we put our identity in, our kids and all these different
situations and dynamics. But when all of that is stripped away, who are we and what are
we accomplishing? Hunter, thank you so much for sharing. I'm going to, I have a little
bit of time left, so I'm going to try to go. I also want a singles crew. So it's not
just a group, I'm just going to go big and go for a big shock. And then also I still,
and I still have struggled with, with the fact that all, almost everybody in my class
from high school is married and having a kid or two. And I feel like that's my fear. The
enemy likes to play on me, but you know what I do, I could cry and flip out on it, but
I don't think that's not what's on their mind saying behind. Yeah. You just got to live
your life Hunter. And I know sometimes that can be hard. And I think there's other people
in the community that have felt similar about whether it's a marriage relationship or having
babies or, you know, work life goals that when, if we just sit and compare ourselves
to other people and where they're at and we're not where they are and we should be there,
well then we're just going to sit and kind of spin in circles because we're so focused
on everybody else and comparison traps that we're getting caught in when the Lord's just
okay, but how can you move forward? How can you take a step further into God's plans and
purpose for your life? So Hunter, thank you so much for sharing. Rachel, go ahead.
Rachel, are you still there?
Okay. Is it Shaina?
I'm sorry, I couldn't remember how to pronounce it.
Can you hear me? I have an earphone. Yeah, I can hear you.
This next week, we're going to have to decide if I'm going back into security where I was
at, or if I stay in casework, and I'm $1200 short of much.
I like casework better, but I have to make my bills.
I'm needing some prayers if you don't mind.
Direction and identity is one thing that she talked about that I really struggle with. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, we'll definitely be praying for you about that.
And on the identity, I would say, you know, just pray into that more if that was speaking to you tonight regarding the casework job.
I know you and I have chatted quite a bit back and forth about your job, and I am believing and praying for you to be able to step into things you really enjoy doing.
Is there any I don't know how many hours you have to work on the casework.
But can you with the casework are you able to work less hours so that you could pick up a fun job where you could meet more people on the side.
Yeah, I only have 40 hours.
Yeah, so thank God you're working a little less with that casework job right.
Okay. Yes, I only have to only get to work 40 hours with this one so I only get I don't get any overtime or anything like that.
So, so I was working way too much. So yeah.
So this to me this is presenting you an opportunity not that I'm just trying to say you all should just work all the time, but if she needs to make extra money to make her bills.
One of the things Shauna has talked about for a while since she joined the community is not having time to even date or enjoy life or do hobbies.
But maybe what she could do right now is consider, well, is there a fun job, is there a side job that she could do that it feels more fun but she would meet people in the community and be out and about, you know, those are just things that we need to consider, instead of always having to go back to what we don't want to be in.
Does that make sense, everyone.
All right.
But I can't tell you what God's going to tell you on that but yeah I remember her teaching like, just because it's familiar, doesn't mean that's where you need to be.
That's right.
I was like, Okay.
But, uh, anyway, uh, I am talking to someone, the dating app.
Everybody seems so far away. But, uh, I am talking to someone and had a few triggers, but we got through them, and then it seems to be working out okay.
At least talking about a friend thing. For now, we'll go from there but that way, the panic and the pressure like the lady was talking about earlier.
Sometimes I feel that, so I have to go slow.
Okay, so you want to be talking to the Lord about that and, and really try to get to what's causing the triggers, is it just because of something they're saying or doing, or is it hitting a pressure point in you that needs healed.
That's what it was and we talked it out because I can see like a replay of my last.
Okay.
He was like, I have no idea what you thought I didn't even do you know this.
But, um, let's be honest trying to think there was something else I was going to mention.
I can't remember what it is.
Well, yeah, that's okay.
While you're thinking of that I'm going to have Kylie share if.
Thank you. I mean, I'm gonna have Kylie share and then if you think of that and want to still share we can circle back okay.
Hi.
Okay, I'm going to show you the fire hose and it's going to sound a little bit unorganized because I don't know where to exactly start but there's a whole bunch of different things and I think they all tie together and it's kind of like, um, I feel unbalanced when I'm dating like it's
I can't give enough time to like my kids or God, it's like it, my life becomes unbalanced, which there's also, I think I have like some spiritual OCD tendencies of like, I'm afraid to be fully surrendered because like, if I don't do XYZ then God's mad at me or like God will make me do something I don't want to do.
And the things I want to do he's going to say no to, and it kind of umbrellas my whole life so I don't know if any of those kind of all tie in together.
But I'll leave it at that for now.
Okay, so when is the first time you believe that if you didn't have XYZ?
do X, Y, Z, then God would be mad at you.
What did that look like?
What was happening when you heard that?
I honestly, like, can't remember the first time
that I experienced that.
I did have, like, a time where I kind of recognized
that I wasn't, like, relying on the blood of Jesus.
I was relying on, like, me fixing things.
Does that make sense?
So, like, receiving forgiveness.
I, like, didn't realize I wasn't.
I thought I had to, like, do all these extras.
So there was a time I realized that,
but I can't remember the first time
that that would have happened.
Okay.
Tell me about your parents growing up.
What was, was it ever like that with them,
where, you know, if you didn't do X, Y, Z,
then they were mad at you?
Honestly, I can't remember a lot of my childhood,
if I'm honest.
It's not like I was raised in a bad home.
Like, I remember my dad was always really super chill.
He was gone a lot with farm, like, he farms.
So I don't really remember him parenting a lot,
and I rarely ever remember him being angry.
My mom would have more so taken on that.
And, like, yeah, I don't know.
There's, like, a comfort level
that I don't necessarily have with her as an adult.
Like, she tends to irritate me really easily,
whereas my dad doesn't, and I don't really know why.
Like, I know if my dad would ask me
the exact same thing my mom did, it wouldn't irritate me.
Okay.
So you may want to look at that,
even if you've already kind of done a little bit of work
when you went through hard work on that,
because if, you know, someone easily irritates us,
there's something probably there that needs healed.
But regarding the feeling unbalanced, you know,
I feel like maybe just giving yourself some grace
is gonna be key right now.
Being a single parent, trying to balance work, kids, dating,
I think that would be a tricky thing for anybody.
And so that's why I keep just hearing grace and space.
So giving yourself that grace and space
to experience, you know,
the truth that God is gonna love you just as much
if you do an hour of devotion, or if you do five minutes,
if you just connect in prayer.
And I'm not saying, you know, for everyone
not to spend time with the Lord,
but I remember going through that before
where I literally would feel like I wasn't close to God
if I didn't spend an hour or more of devotion time.
And some of that was from religious teaching
and stuff I was under.
Now, I love spending time with the Lord, y'all.
So it's some of my favorite time,
but what I've had to learn over the years
is that if I believe the lie that God's mad at me
or I'm not close to him
because I didn't spend time with him today,
well, then I believe that God leaves me.
Think about that.
That God leaves me, but in his word,
he says he doesn't leave me or forsake me.
Now, there are times where David would be like,
please don't take your Holy Spirit from me.
So I think we can experience that pulling away,
but is it God pulling away or is it us doing something
that causes that feeling of God
or the Holy Spirit not being close?
Now, if we sin, I think that's different
because we're causing like a fracture
in the relationship there.
But if it's just like, okay, you have a really busy week,
I just wanna see you partner with grace.
And what does it look like and feel like
when you are doing that and these lies are surfacing,
in order for you to know the root of that first time
where you believe the lie that if you didn't do X, Y, Z,
then God was gonna be mad at you,
you might have to actually function in that
to uncover the lies that might surface
when you're experiencing that.
Does that make sense?
Yeah, it does.
And I think those lies all tie into being afraid
of being fully surrendered.
Cause I'm like, if he's mad at me,
that's just like the idea that you like wanna pull away
rather than draw near.
Okay, so is it that you struggle actually
with closeness then?
Like relationship, I'm not talking about religion
or checking something off of a box,
but like genuine, like intimacy with the Lord.
Cause when you're saying you mentioned twice now
that you think you're really struggling
with fully surrendering, is it surrendering fully
to the relationship with Him at the core?
Probably, yes.
Which makes me actually wonder
because your dad had to work so much.
If there's a connection there, okay.
So I would just pray into that.
You don't have to be mad at dad or any of those things, but I think it'd be worth you
looking at, you know, because whether we realize it or not, even people that have had amazing
dads who had to work a lot or were gone, or even when they were home, if they weren't
emotionally available, uh, kids can develop subconscious lies that they're not a priority
or that they really can't, um, get close to dad cause dad's too busy or dad has other
things to do or, or whatever the lies might be that trickle in there.
But just, if you start just asking the Lord, um, I actually just, this is totally in a
secular show and I'm like, you know, it wasn't a bad show, but just interestingly enough,
I saw this episode last night where this guy was believing a lie about his dad and blamed
his dad for his mom, mom passing away.
Your mom's alive.
So that's not necessarily where I'm going with this, but he, as a kid basically fabricated
his own idea about his mom because he couldn't handle the truth and the reality.
And so dad was the bad guy and mom was the good guy, but mom wasn't actually there.
And so the reason I'm mentioning this again, I'm not saying I want you to be mad at your
dad, but I think the fact that you get really irritated with your mom.
And dad wasn't there as much mom had to take on being dad and mom, it sounds like quite
a bit.
Yeah.
And so there might be some resentment there that might actually be like underlying towards
dad, but you're projecting it onto mom.
And again, I'm not saying that's true, but you may just want to look at it.
And if it has nothing to do with that, just, just ask the Lord, just to show you what it
is connected to.
Okay.
That sounds good.
Yeah.
Thanks.
You're welcome.
I know it can be tough because we may not want to look at some of these things, especially
if we have a good relationship with that parent and that doesn't have to change you all.
When we have heart work, sometimes that just that healing, if, if there is stuff there
that the Lord reveals, it can actually make that even better.
And then maybe some of the stuff with mom can heal in that process.
And then because of that, you may give yourself more grace and space as you are mom and daughter
to the Lord.
Yeah.
All right.
So Dawn, I think I have one more and then we're going to close it down for the night.
You all.
Okay.
Hello, Anthony.
Hi.
Hey, I started working on some of the Harvard, so I definitely was going to check in with
that.
Yeah.
One of the things that I, I'm believing is of course, a lot of religious lies, but that,
so God doesn't provide for me as well as my parents did or as well as my husband's dead.
So I'm going, I didn't do a lot.
I did a lot of hard work with my parents, but I didn't do any with my, my three husbands.
So I was married three times and twice to the same man.
And that's a lot of stuff there.
So the thing with the financial hardship and the provision is that there was a time where
after my mom and dad both passed, we lost the house.
I lost everything.
I didn't get the inheritance and I wound up homeless.
Where was God?
God, I blamed you for that.
I was homeless.
And that's a very big, uh, I'm showing us a very big fear of mine.
And so when finances come and I can't pay bills, my mom and dad always paid everything.
You know, it's like my husband took very, my husband took very good care of me.
I was never poor.
We never lacked, you know, they had businesses.
And they always took care of me.
So when I lost all that and it's just me and the Lord's supposed to step in and he's not
taking care of me like my husband did or like my dad did or like my mom did.
So financially I'm all alone.
You know, I don't have a lot of education.
I mean, I do have some, and then I worked and served in ministry, but here I am by myself.
You know, I lost the three big providers in my life and God didn't come through because
I was homeless.
That's a very big issue that I feel like I've never dealt with.
I think it's affected a lot of stuff in me.
So doing this hard work a second time, there was a lot of lack and it came because of death
and because of this.
And I didn't see God, like, God, why are you dropping the ball?
Why, why are you not taking care of me?
Why did I have to drop out of Bible school?
And I almost lost my home and my car.
Yeah.
It's a mess.
You're well, Hey, I feel like you're making massive progress right now because this is
stuff that you didn't unpack when you went through heartwork the first time.
And so I feel like you're on a good path.
I know it might feel messy right now, but you're not going to stay here.
You're moving through this.
Okay.
You're going to keep going.
Um, but you.
Remember in heart work,
I don't know if you all would remember this,
but I always tell everyone,
you know, God doesn't actually,
he doesn't do the things to us
that we often think he's doing,
but we do need to forgive him,
especially if, you know,
we believe he's wronged us in some way.
So Dawn, I really would recommend
doing a forgiveness prayer regarding
like when you ended up homeless
and forgiving God for, you know, all of that,
because you're carrying that
and you're putting it and projecting it onto God
when really, you know,
the reality is people made mistakes
where the provisions weren't made
when parents and things passed away.
That's the truth.
And that's what's hard for us to look at
is that the mistakes that people have made
that didn't provide even ourselves.
Now you were a kid when that happened,
I'm assuming, correct?
No, no, I've been an adult.
No, it was only, my mom passed doing COVID in 2020.
Okay, so were you living with her then
and that's when you became homeless?
She was living with me.
We were together.
We shared everything together.
I was taking care of her like Jackie did with her mom.
I was her caretaker.
Okay, okay, so this is where it's really tricky, y'all.
We struggle to own our side of the street
and things sometimes, right?
And like, I remember just being really upset with God
when some things happened financially
when I went through my divorce.
And, you know, the reality of that situation
when I really was honest with myself fully
without going into the full situation,
I will just let you, like the high point
is that I allowed my ex-husband to manipulate me
and I asked my mom to do something
I didn't even wanna ask her to do
and it involved her house
and taking out a new loan on her home.
Now, my ex said he was gonna fulfill all of the things.
He's gonna pay for the new loan, all this stuff.
Well, he didn't.
My mom ended up losing her home
and I was playing, I played a part in that.
I could have blamed my ex completely for that.
I could have blamed that on God
because why didn't God protect me
when my ex didn't hold up his end of the bargain?
But at the end of the day, I was a part of that decision.
And so I had to own my side of the street in that
and because like when I did that, I took power back
because if I just say, well, it is, you know,
it's everybody else's fault, including God's,
then I give all power over to everyone else
and everything else, but I have no power anymore.
But when I say, okay, what could I have done differently
in that situation?
Well, I could have said no to him,
even though he was kind of being abusive and blowing up.
Yeah, that was scary for me,
but I didn't have to say yes to him, I didn't.
And so I want to encourage all of you, you know,
when we do have an opportunity as an adult
to make a decision to save money
or learn how to, you know, budget our money better
so that we're not in the same cycle.
And Dawn, I don't know the whole story of your dynamics,
so I wanna tread lightly here,
but just that we would start to really see
how can we shift?
How can we grow?
How can we heal?
Because there's heart healing that needs to happen too,
that helps us become better stewards
of the money that God gives us, you know,
where maybe it is learning a new skill.
Cause you know, I heard you say,
like, I'm not super educated, but you're still here.
You can learn a new skill.
Everybody can, no matter how old we are,
we can learn a new skill.
We can, you know, learn how to, you know,
go in, work at a new job and, you know,
make a little bit of income in a different way
than we have before.
There's always ways that we can grow
and come out of where we were at.
And I say that having literally,
y'all, I literally moved to a different state
to move away from an abusive husband years ago.
I didn't have a house.
I almost lost my car.
I didn't know how I was going to pay for anything.
So know that I'm saying these things from a place of,
I struggled financially, deeply,
but God taught me one step at a time.
And I'm not saying I've always got it figured out,
but like how to save, how to invest,
how to budget my money, how to grow.
Oh, and then guess what?
When I gained those skills and when I healed in my heart
so that I didn't keep making
those same mistakes financially,
then I felt empowered and guess what?
I didn't blame God for those things anymore.
And I know that can be hard.
I know it can because whether we want to admit it or not,
sometimes it's easier to blame God.
It has to do with a lot of the religious lies
because the lies I've been told is that either God
wants to bless you or he doesn't bless you
or if you're a tribe, you give money, you give money,
you give, you give, you give, you sow, you sow,
then you're gonna reap money in finances
with the prosperity gospel.
And I've been exposed to that for so long.
And if I don't see it working,
I'm like, okay, I don't see this working.
I'm sowing, I'm giving and nothing's happening.
So what am I, I blame myself.
What am I doing wrong?
And I get mad and just frustrated.
And I understand too.
And that's why I said, I don't know all the details.
So I always want to tread lightly
because I don't ever want someone to feel,
I'm so glad when all of you share.
And so I don't want you to ever feel like, oh my God,
I never want to get in the heartwork seat ever again.
That was brutal.
No, it's good.
And you know a little bit of stuff,
like with the school and stuff
and like nothing came and this didn't happen.
I was like, God, I feel like you dropped the ball on me.
I was like, what brought me to this school
and then now I can't do it.
Now I have to drop out.
Yeah, so one of the things I want to,
if you all will look, okay.
So not that we're going to get into financials tonight,
but I do feel like it's important to mention this
because of something you just mentioned there as well.
So one of the things it talks about is the storehouse.
That God blesses the storehouse.
Well, that's money and savings, you all, it is.
And so many times people do get caught up in giving,
giving, giving, giving, giving.
And like you all, I love to be generous.
I love to give to people.
Understand that I'm saying this from a place
I do love to be generous.
But one of the things God convicted me of years ago
is if I keep giving to the point
that I can't even pay my bills,
I have something out of balance.
There needs to be balance.
God wants us to give,
but not to the point that we're not paying our bills.
So working with a financial advisor
or someone that can coach you
regarding how to start developing
some of those muscles and skills will be,
man, a huge benefit to you, Dawn, 100%.
I think it will be really, really helpful
and preferably not someone that is cloaked
in a lot of religious mindsets.
Yeah.
Someone that has a heart that loves the Lord,
that walks in the fruits of the spirit,
but doesn't speak religion language.
Yeah.
And if you need help, you know, I know you're not,
you're a couple hours away from me.
I could absolutely try to see if I can find,
I know some people up that way
because my husband's in the Florida district.
And so I could put some feelers out
and see if I can find somebody
that might be able to help in your area
and I can reach out to you.
So I will work on that.
Yeah, definitely.
Yeah.
I'll work on that in the next few days.
Yeah, it's my pleasure.
You all, thank you for sharing your stories and your lives.
We went a little over.
I hope this has been a blessing to you.
I hope it's helping.
Definitely, if you're getting
any kind of breakthrough from this,
come in and share in the group, you know,
because your breakthrough
is gonna create breakthrough for other people.
Also, if you have questions, you know,
just come in as you're processing and share in the groups
and we can help you unpack this more.
God has so much more for us in the days to come, all of us.
So Father, I'm gonna pray for us.
Father, thank you so much for everything that you do.
God, thank you for helping us to,
just what I hear in my spirit,
take off any rose colored glasses, Lord,
that we would see you clearly,
that we would see that you are a good father
who does give good gifts to your children.
And Lord, that you would continue to meet us on our path
as we're walking towards you,
that you would bring revelation and insight
and help us to hear what your spirit
is saying in every moment.
God, I thank you that you're gonna help us to overcome fear,
that you're gonna help us to, yeah, Lord,
not just put a bandaid over the symptom,
but to ask you to reveal the root
of what's really causing these behaviors
and these unhealthy patterns in our lives.
We thank you for revealings, for healing
that are gonna happen, acceleration in our community.
And we thank you for grace.
We thank you for hope and joy to continue to be,
yeah, Lord, stirred up in us in such a way
that we would just bring glory to you, Lord.
And we thank you, Lord, for.
Psalm 27 13 that we would experience the goodness of God in the land of the living and we believe all these things in Jesus name.
I hope you all have a great rest of your night. God bless you. We'll be seeing you in the group everyone. Bye.
Thank you.
Bye. You're welcome.