Hi, it's the 9th of June, we're with all these amazing mighty men of valor and we're just
we're going to discuss what what wins we had and welcome all, Christopher, James, Joel,
Abraham, Stephen.
So anybody have any wins?
Any wins anything that like you're like, you're just excited, or even if you're not excited
to talk about it, but like, like, officially, calling a gal that I'm pursuing and dating
a girlfriend, because I introduced her to my family on a FaceTime call saying, Oh, hey,
this is my friend that I'm pursuing and dating because I thought that was a professional
doesn't make someone feel like forced to rush and she's like, really, I'm a friend that
you're dating.
Wow.
I've walked into a trap.
Like that Star Wars meme.
It's a trap.
Yeah.
I was like, well, what word would you like me to use or name or state that makes you
feel comfortable and not feel like I almost feel like I'm talking to a kindergartner.
But hopefully, you'll never see this recording.
But
I don't know.
Yeah.
Kind of gated.
Right.
But you're in a stage that would be stage three, then right?
Well, it's still stage two to me just based on the timeframe, because we've only known
each other a month, like since I introduced myself to her, but you just did you say girlfriend?
I said girlfriend.
I told her that I'm still talking to other people.
I know it feels it feels like a weird terminology.
It feels like we're speaking two different languages.
Like, I know that I'm only pursuing her.
Really?
Yeah.
Like, just like everyone that I've opened up to in or extended a opportunity for conversation
and community just feels very like, no disrespect to them, like the members of the LIS community
that I'm chatted with or other people in the world.
It's just that they're all cool people.
I just don't feel like and I don't mean like feel like a weird somatic expression, but
just like just something just doesn't click with anyone really.
But with her it's it's a lot of things kind of in a scary way all at once like confirmations
of things I've been praying about for a long time and same thing for myself to her things
that she'd been praying about for a long time and setting up boundaries and I'm driving
from again, Vegas, a cross country, a buddy from my church here in Vegas that moved away
to get married in Ohio, then go attend church with this girl in Pennsylvania, only to turn
around and go back to Iowa and unpack all my stuff that I'm hopefully shipping out tomorrow.
Oh, great way to actually get in.
I mean, like you're heading towards it sounds like you're heading towards a level three.
Yeah, like I feel like sweater collection.
That's why is that why you wear as she has one.
It's not really ugly.
It's actually looks like pretty.
But you know, I mean, like the whole point of a ugly Christmas sweater is that it looks
gaudy and ridiculous or like general wear, which is why I think they're all awesome.
Yeah.
Not that not that they're actually hideous.
And unfortunately, I've already packed mine away.
So I can't just actually wait, I take that back.
Oh, no.
There's one right here that she asked if I could come work out with her at her CrossFit
gym.
Like the following day after church, and I'm like, Oh, yes, I can.
She's like, you're gonna wear something appropriate.
I'm like, are they all Christians?
I've got something appropriate.
What is it?
What does it say?
I can't read it.
It says yellow.
Just kidding.
Happy Easter.
That's cool.
And it's pink.
So I think it just looks that much more ridiculous on me.
Yeah.
But yeah, you know, introduce myself to her.
Yeah, introduce myself to her.
And like a fun creative way.
She said, let's talk about everything on her dating profile.
And I was like, if you could be a lion, what type of lion would you be?
Like Daniel Delgado and I were messaging each other back and forth.
And he's like, there is no way that she responds back.
And I just send him back an exclamation mark.
She responds.
That's so funny.
negative way. So, you know, you guys, I don't, I wouldn't always
say, you know, ask those questions. But I do think that
creative questions, fun questions are a nice, easy way
to break in. So that's it. That's awesome. David, any
other anybody else got something they want to share?
Hey, David, what if she told you what kind and then she said
she was lying?
I was I was I was almost expecting her to go. Well, I'm
a feline. No, no, she said she would be a fierce lion. And then
I literally gave a synopsis of Lafcadio. And for those of you
who don't know, that's a Shel Silverstein poem about a lion
that just wants to chill and eat marshmallows, but it's totally
capable of eating a hunter that's trying to kill him, and
then steal his gun, and then steal his clothes, and then use
his gun to shoot other hunters, and then take their clothes and
take their guns and create like a small little conglomeracy of
lions with clothes and guns. Just so we can move to New York
and move into a little mansion and fill in a hot tub and eat
marshmallows all day only to realize this life kind of sucks.
I really, I really just want to go back to being a lion.
You know, when you get outside your identity, you know, a lot
of times you think, Oh, if I just do this, and I've just be
this, then I'll be better. Right. But like, you know, being
grounded in who you are in your identity in Christ is really
huge. You know, because there's only one you.
I'm so glad that you caught on to that. Because that was like,
part of me projecting that inner sense of like a metaphor for my
life as a whole. But she just kind of read it as that's a
peculiar response, because she'd never heard of that poem.
Neither. And so she just thought I was a little bit crazy, wacky,
but funny. And she's still talking to me.
Well, let's see. And you guys are headed towards level three.
All right. John, anything new and exciting?
None. I just came back from Portland. I went to my
grandson's birthday. Once two and once for that was nice.
That's cool. Yeah, they're actually in cameras in
Washington, right by Portland. But it was pretty. It's like 80
degrees.
That's nice. Yeah, you know, when I've gone to Oregon and
Seattle, both time, you know, the times I've gone, it's been
beautiful. And then you get this, like, they're lying to us.
It's not the weather's. They just don't want us here. But I
guess in the winter and stuff, it gets gloomy.
So like my mom lives, my family lives in Washington. They count
how many days are sunny, just so you know, how many
California I don't think I counted how many days were
sunny. Just saying.
No, you might count the cloudy days. But yeah,
it's usually rainy days. You're like, yeah, there was like five
last year.
Yeah. So I know it's crazy.
Well, if not, what's it? Hey, Daniel, welcome. We're just
checking in. You got any wins, Daniel, we're just talking
about this what's going on. I got one to share, but I want to
make sure everybody got their their shot.
Yeah, I think Hey, good to see you guys. I don't think I have
any new wins. I mentioned kind of going level three with
somebody a few weeks ago. Yeah. So that's going great. It's
going great. Yeah. So
you guys have you have you had your meetup yet? Or is it still
to come? Right?
It's still to come. Sure. Yeah, she's gonna visit June 20th.
Through the 25th or something. So yeah,
I was like, was it the 12th? Because I'm looking at the 12th.
I wish.
Well, Lord, may your favor be on that hope that meeting and Jesus
name. So um, so you know, I am. Hey, James. Hey, James. I'm
Mike, by the way. And I'm in the Silicon Valley. I do. I'm a
master machinist, basically. And that's kind of what I do. You
know, I do a lot of ministry and a lot of different things. But
James, where are you from?
I'm from Los Angeles. I'm working in Nashville for the
next two months. So I, I opened mental health clinics out here
and other places. So yeah, it's good to be here.
That's cool. Welcome. Are you? Is it just I haven't been around
and because I don't, I didn't recognize Joel either. So
yeah, I've been coming a bit just kind of staying with the
book and doing some of the work. That's pretty much it.
Cool. Well, welcome.
So, you know, I've had a lot going on lately. And, you know,
I
I really felt like God was going to do something and I was supposed to switch to this one church.
And that was about four-ish months ago, right?
And I had a really kind of distinct picture of what it was going to look like and who
was going to be with me going there.
And then it all kind of fell apart.
And I was like, man, what's going on?
I don't understand.
I guess I'm not going there.
Right.
Well, this is my first week there and it was amazing.
And so like, and it was exactly how I saw it six months ago.
But like, you know, so, um, you know, things, sometimes things come around, you know, you
know, not that, not that you guys have ever heard this on this call, but like sometimes
things come full circle, you know, like, you know, and so I had a full circle Sunday, you
know?
Um, and, uh, yeah, so that was, it was pretty cool.
So, um, Joey, Joey, you got anything you want to chat about?
Are you good?
Uh, not too much going on.
Um, I'm actually on vacation right now with my, my family.
Um, but, uh, so that's nice, but nothing, nothing too much going on.
Okay.
Cool.
All right.
You know, Abram, you can chat if you want.
If not, I understand.
Right.
Like, you know, I just, I just, I love you, bro.
And so, um, does anybody have any topics that they wanted to want to cover and get
to talk about?
I guess I have a, sorry, go ahead, man.
Oh, go for it.
I just had a question as to, uh, sorry, I'm trying to take a TV off a wall, uh, by myself.
There we go.
I'm on camera now.
Um, so I guess with level three is level three exclusive, or is it level four that's exclusive
level four is the engagement process.
Yep.
But which is it?
So four is the engagement.
You were correct.
Three is three is exclusive.
Two is, you know, talking three goes like, we're gonna, we're going to, you know, choose
each other.
And four is like, we're going, we like each other and we're going farther.
And five is marriage.
If I remember right.
Don't quote me.
Yeah.
Well, and I guess that's, uh, how do I proceed?
Like things are moving kind of quick.
Like we've only known each other a month or it feel like, I guess, comfortably call it
a level two.
Well, you're already at, if you're talking with her, you're already at a level two.
Yeah.
No, but I mean like, but I mean like that, I want to still call it a level two before
like declaring it a three, um, even though we've already had a lot of conversations about
like theoretically, how would marriage look theoretically this, that, because it is long
distance.
Yeah.
Um, well, and you know, a lot of those questions come up.
What's that?
You know, long distance is one of those things where long distance is hard.
So it's kind of an accelerated timeframe.
Oh, I did not know that.
Oh yeah.
Because all the other ones have been like really slow, really intermittent conversations
with anyone else.
Well, that's, well, it's really hard to generate.
So you, have you met her in person?
Yeah.
So it went for two weeks and then because I was driving cross country in DC, she mentioned
DC, that's right by Pennsylvania where I live at.
And I'm like, you know, I hate to like sound this vulnerable and trying to get to know
someone.
But was that you dropping the hanky like straight up wrote it down?
Cause I was like, well, I either she is and I go for it or she isn't.
And I gladly know that before I suggest and rush things, but she admitted, yes, that was
me dropping the hanky.
I'm like, cool.
Would you like to meet up for an in-person date?
We met May 27th when I did my return trip, drove two hours out of the way.
So one of the reasons why I asked you this really important to get.
So I was in a online relationship and it was amazing.
And then we got in person and it was horrific, right?
So like, it doesn't always translate, right.
You know, because people feel, people are, feel safer.
Sometimes they have, there's a lot, there's a myriad of issues that happens when, you
know, they're, they may be introverted and then they get into a public setting and they
kind of freak out.
Right.
You know?
So.
Cool.
So cool.
I get, I think that's just good to hear that from you, that it is an accelerated thing.
Like I said, you were talking about boundaries earlier, right?
Yeah.
Boundaries.
Yeah.
I mean, like when I met her, I only shook her hand and she said the fact that I didn't
try to hug her, didn't try to kiss her like every other date has ever done.
And that just made her like so much more comfortable with me and just feel like I was
a point of security.
for and asking to pray and yeah.
So, you know, you guys like when you get, okay.
So I would encourage you all.
I mean, every, you guys are all adults, right?
But when the physical side comes in,
whether it be a hug or this or that, hugs,
it can be, it's better to slow play it
and just be friends and be cool and get to know the person
because like, you know, when, you know, people,
a lot of people start kissing and all that
and it kind of sets the clock on the physical, right?
Like, you know, and it puts an extra tension
where you actually don't get to really,
it kind of muddles the senses and stuff
because now you have the physical part in it.
And it's just cool to get to know somebody
and like, because great relationships
are built on friendships, right?
And friends, you know, and so not that you can't hug
and it's like, it's not a fast rule,
but I would just encourage you take it slow.
And like David was saying, you know, she,
a lot of ladies are oppressed
and they actually appreciate
not being pushed into that right away, right?
So, is it Stefan or Steven?
Are you there?
Hey, Mike, it's Stefan.
It's Stefan, I thought so, yeah.
What's going on?
Just a quick question.
I've been in a level three, four,
question to the group or especially those guys
that's been in long-term relationships
or marriages before, but I'm divorced,
but I'm in a level three for just over four months
and the lady is also on part of our group last year single.
She actually introduced me to it.
And I've, I think I'm picking up
that her previous relationship,
which is about two years or ended two years ago,
there's still a couple of things that frazzles her,
especially if the guy pops a message or something.
She has tried to block him as far as possible
because he didn't sound like a healthy individual.
And I'm just wondering how,
if anyone's had experience with something like this
and how best to help or to, yeah.
And timelines, because we, yeah,
we both like each other a lot and we've seen each other,
we long-term or distance dating,
but we've seen each other quite a lot
in the past four, say four and a half months.
And she is looking to relocate to where I am.
I've got a little boy, so I can't move.
So it's pretty serious,
but it just feels like there's maybe something
on that side that might need some healing or assistance.
I want to make sure,
because I'm not quite sure I heard you correctly, right?
So she had a relationship two years ago
that's still calling her.
Is that what you were saying?
So her previous relationship ended two years ago.
And it seems, yeah, that ended two years ago.
And shortly, or probably six to 12 months after that,
she joined last year single.
And she's done everything she can to block this guy.
He does seem to be a, I don't know,
not a healthy individual in general.
Functional, but not healthy.
Okay, okay, so sorry.
That's what I thought you said.
Okay, so basically she's trying to,
this dude's still pinging her,
even though she said, go away.
And like, they have had no relationship, right?
Yeah, yeah, so the thing that happened last
is she's blocked him on every form of communication she has.
And he's sent a physical package
to where she lives in the past short while ago.
And I just, it frazzled her,
because she's trying to get away as soon as possible
Understandably, right?
You know, you said, dude, we're done.
And he's still, anybody have,
I don't have anything in this realm,
but anybody else had anything similar to this?
Were they in close proximity to each other?
They also did long distance,
but long distance for them were say two hour drive.
Long distance for us is a two hour flight.
Yeah, so he's actually, he's closer than,
closer.
Yeah, he's way closer to her than I am.
Yeah, I have experience with this.
I was dating.
a woman like in a social group and an ex was kind of like hovering in the group and
you know I guess like he hugged her one time and like hands went kind of low you know and
he it was like a previously like unhealthy relationship I guess you'd say so I wasn't
in denial about that and I think she just to her it was like something that fascinated her
I think from her past and was familiar and so I think it was like just having a conversation with
her like hey like look this is a boundary for me how can I support you I'm not sure if you
kind of have the insight around this and so just kind of like supported her through it and
yeah just not criticizing her about it or not getting insecure I think it was just
staying rooted and being like I can support you and like for me yes it's not gonna work so
yeah that's my experience so cool thanks James that's quite an awful thing
yeah so I think really this is an opportunity for you to be there for her
and to like and to be that strong refuge right I mean obviously prayer you know
acknowledge and validate that it's I mean it is frazzling right I mean especially because
women's number one need is security right and this is messing with her security big time
100 percent and I'm sorry that's hard right I just want to acknowledge that but it does
give you a great opportunity to be there for her right in the best way you can I mean I mean
obviously you're a couple of our flight apart but have you guys talked about I mean like so
I'm not I don't want to put you on the spot but have you thought about
going to a stage four I mean have you been where have you with that yeah no that's
did you cut out so is that that's on the table
oh do we lose him I lost him okay so you guys like
one of the things you know I might come back oh you're back oh even though yours says muted
it's okay all right so you were thinking about going level four or is that kind of where you're
at yeah yeah it's we just before that um we're doing Simbas with with Jackie that's right I
remember that that is an amazing ritual that is amazing you guys any of you guys do get into like
a serious relationship do Simbas basically it's a it's a assessment tool you answer questions she
answers questions and then they put them together and they're like hey here's areas where you're
really good and here's areas where you might struggle on how and then you can discuss how to
to navigate um where where you might be hitting heads a little bit um so yeah save your marriage
before it starts is what Simbas stands for um sorry just just so you know um but so yeah I just
be there for her as much as you can that you know that um that's a hard position and lord Jesus we
just pray that um your hand of protection would be over that relationship you over his um his I
don't know her name but his future his girlfriend his level three girlfriend and that um lord I just
pray your head your hand of protection would be around him you release angels to watch over her
and that you get give um wisdom and what to do about the situation and that actually lord that
I pray that right now and Jesus name it go away and um we just thank you lord that you're amazing
and that you love us amen all right amen sorry you're going through that but I'll be praying
I'll keep I'll continue praying um all right thank you hey I just want to add just to just double
check Stefan did that address your concern or was yeah I I sensed an additional concern about
and maybe this is me reading too much into it it almost sounded like you felt like there was still
a soul tie there or some kind of unfinished business is that am I reading into that or was
that a secondary concern that you had it's a secondary concern Daniel but I I know she has
done some work in terms of soul ties and breaking some of those um I was
I was just surprised to see how frazzled, or how frazzled she was, or what it caused in her reaction.
And I think there's probably a little bit more work to be done on her side regarding the history.
But yeah, I was just wondering from my side, because I can mention a couple of things and support her, as Mike said,
I can't do anything physically from where I am. I'm praying for her, and we're praying at the same time, or together, when we are on the call.
So, yeah.
Well, and it's understandable for her to be frazzled. Right? That's violating boundaries, and that's violating safety.
Right? And you guys, don't ever do that. When a lady puts up a boundary, honor it.
A no is a no.
Right? And so, but yeah. And so, like I said, I mean, did you guys all know that safety is in a woman's court?
So the gold digger, like, whatever, stereotype, right, really is just a woman looking for safety, and they find it in money, and whatever.
But like, their core need is to feel safe and protected. Right?
And so, that's the cool thing about the divine masculinity, is we have a, you know, we can use our strength to be a safe place.
To be a refuge. To be a, you basically, like, I like to use the word, like a greenhouse.
We can be a greenhouse where they can flourish in it and feel safe.
And that's what masculinity is made, you know, you can slay a dragon, but you're actually, you know, you can also be gentle and hear her heart.
Right? I mean, like, David, you look at David, he was a mighty warrior, but like, you read the Psalms, and the dude, his heart was amazing.
I thought you were talking about me.
You know, David, there's some truth to that too, but you know, I was talking, you know, biblical David, you know.
I don't know how, I don't know your history, David, you may have slayed a million, 10,000, but you know, but it's key.
And like, and whatever they're going through, whether it's at work or, that they feel heard.
Seen. Known.
And so, I don't know how, what your guys' relationship history is, but like, when a woman asks you, how was your day?
That's really her attempt to connect.
It's kind of like, your day is a connection point, but really what she's saying is, I want to connect with you.
And I miss that quite often where it was like, oh, my day sucked.
And then I went on, right?
You know, like, I don't even talk about my day, but you know, and I would miss that connection point because really what she's like, I haven't seen you all day.
I really want to know where you, you know, and it's a safety connection.
Emotional, like if you guys, a lot of you guys are all pretty solid from what I know, but like, you know, every guy has a need for sex, right?
Every woman has a need for emotional connectivity and like our need for sex, their need for emotional, they're the same.
It's the same thing.
So really knowing, like being emotionally available.
Right.
And I know for me, that was a real struggle.
I literally had a piece of paper with all the emotions on it.
And I'd be like, what am I feeling today?
I felt like this big, you know, I felt so dumb, but like emotional connectivity is like oxygen.
Right.
And it's great.
It was great for me.
All right.
Just so like feeling heard, supported, not fixed.
You know, I'm really like I know it's so hard to not want to fix things, but a lot of times they just a lot of a lot of times they just need to talk about it and they figure it out on their own.
And I know a lot of you.
I don't know about the new guys.
Yeah, the emotional wheel.
Yeah, I haven't seen the wheel.
I had a page.
I think the wheel probably was pretty cool, too.
But like if you guys haven't really connected with your emotions and and for guys, it's not something that we naturally do.
We actually naturally stuff them because, you know, we got to be tough.
Right.
I used to be thinking Superman was whatever she was looking for.
But really, she was just looking for me to connect with her.
Right.
And so and and the beauty of it is, is when you don't have to be strong.
time, you actually get to be known as who you are for all of
you and not just it's pretty exhausting trying to be the
strong guy all the time. You know that I'm tough, you know,
it's like, yeah. So, so like, the divine masculine, you know,
you can slay a dragon, but yet you're a mate, but you can love
people. Well, right. And I think Jesus, Jesus, you know, you ever
think about the the money changers in the temple? I mean,
that's like the mafia, right? Like, so you got the the Jewish
mafia sitting on the steps of the temple, and he drove them
out. So, Jesus is no milk toast dude, right? How he actually got
the, I'm like, I still, I have a hard time, you know, my little
gentle Jesus and, you know, driving out the money changers.
I mean, he had to be a rough and tough dude, especially to be a
carpenter in a place that doesn't have big trees. I mean,
that's, that had to have been a rough gig too. Hey, Hunter. So
like, anybody stuck? Or like, has anybody been trying to been on
the apps or anybody in a place where they feel stuck on
anything? What's going on, Hunter? What are you feeling
stuck?
Right. I tell you, I had two phone dates from salt. I met
somebody on salt, but they're in the UK. Yeah. But a I trust
going confidence and they started the conversation. So I
texted and I told him about the I spend too much of the third of
the time on each phone chat about our geographic location.
And then, and I tried to ask something about herself and and
then finally died down. She lost interest. So then after that, I
was like, you know what, I didn't think this was gonna keep
going anyways, because that would mean one of us can
relocate. And I am my non negotiable is leaving my
country because I love my country. I left salt and I might
go on the dating app.
Okay. Yeah, you know, starting out where you're crossing a non
negotiable is probably not the best plan. You know, you know,
but I mean, did you know the non negotiable before you started
it? You know, sometimes it's a good thing when you actually get
on a date. You're like, Yeah, you know what, I didn't realize
this is a non negotiable, but it was.
Well, I didn't ask about being a non negotiable. It's probably
because she was, she was tired and everything. And, and I think
about another thing that she was interested in is a connection
because she started saying, Hey, how are you? And I responded.
And I, and I try to make it make the conversation interesting. My
first one was phone chat was 20 minutes, the other one was 27.
And then, and then she went, we went a couple of days, I
respond, no response for 48 hours, I was thinking. So I went
back on it. And I, I led by saying, you want to meet again?
She goes, Yeah. And that's time she was too tired and didn't
want to be involved. And I didn't think she's going to be
interested. So I think, you know, I'm moving on. So and I
figure, oh, I'm not gonna feel bad. That's there's great
tragedies in the world.
Yeah, well, and there's and you learn something, right? You
learn that you have non negotiable about moving, you
know, in your country.
I know. And I'm, and I'm already got something going anyways.
So great. Good job.
Like, I tell you, I'm going to Singles Cruise in January.
That's exciting.
Figured, and I'm going to Greece, hopefully in the fall,
and then do a multi extension and be gone for two weeks.
Figured, you know what, like I said, why just married? Why just
go on these trips before marriage? Because if I'm
married, it'd be a lot harder to go on them.
Not necessarily. You know, you know, I would challenge that
because, you know, a lot of times, you know, doing those
trips, when you're married, you actually have a developing
memories together. But no, you know, and like, and who knows
how much she's gonna make? It may be an issue. Money may not
be an issue. So you could actually travel a lot more.
I know. Well, no. Well, that's the thing. Well, or just or how
about just go because because it'll make me happy. Remember,
happiness starts with me. And the part spearman would just be
an extension of my happiness.
Yeah. Well, I mean, you want to live your best life now. Like
you don't wait, you don't wait for a woman to come into your
life. Because it's to start living. It's because because
some door that's why I mean, it's because this door might
close, because I wait till I'm married. Well, by the time you're
married, that opportunity door is closed. So enjoy while you
can.
Yeah, no. And there's, there's some validity to that. I just
wanted to say don't be, you know, like, be too on a cruise
is cool, too. I guess I'll just leave it at that. So, Daniel,
we talked to Christopher, you got anything going on? Are you
busy? You know, I know. But, uh, not really. All right. Um,
happy
Have you guys taken any shots?
You know, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take, right?
You know, like, that's what I always tell myself.
Like, you know, it's better to swing and miss
than to go back home and go,
man, I wish I'd have taken that swing, right?
And I'm looking really bad taking some swings,
by the way, guys.
Like, you know, I'm like, oh, that really did not
come out the way I thought it would.
But, you know, getting reps is really important, right?
Because getting reps, like Hunter, he's got a...
I'm Babe Ruth with the swings.
There you go, Babe Ruth, you know, Hall of Famer.
But you learn things.
The thing about dating and getting the reps in is,
you know, every time I swing and miss or, you know,
fall out of the batter's box when I was swinging
because it was so awkward.
But, you know, I learned.
I'm like, yeah, let's not do that again.
You know, but like you grow
and you're closer to hitting a home run.
You know, you're learning what your non-negotiables are
and what is actually important to you.
One of the things, like, I mean, I've learned
what I like about different dates.
I'd be like, oh, I really like,
what did I like about that gal?
You know, there's things that I didn't like,
but like, I really like this part.
And now I can take that and that's one of those things
I'm going to start looking for
when I meet somebody, right?
And the more you do it,
the more it becomes second nature, right?
You know, but so, all right.
Anybody on apps?
I might think I was going to say,
oh, go ahead, man.
I was thinking about joining the,
I might join the, what's that called again?
Yeah, archive.
I already have it on there.
And I think about taking advantage of it
the discount.
Yeah, that'd be a good plan.
I encourage you.
You know, apps can be terrible,
but I mean, I know half a dozen people
who actually got married off apps, right?
Like, you know, so I just, you know,
sometimes they can be brutal, you know,
but at the same time, you know, take your swings.
So was that you, David?
Do you want to say something?
Sorry.
Yeah, yeah.
I just wanted to say something real quick.
It was Arc that I met the young lady on
that I'm currently pursuing.
Sorry, I'm in the garage trying to find
the right socket wrench.
But so I met her on Arc
and I also met 20 other women on Arc
that all like had snappy, good, creative, whatever.
I even met one of them in person
when I was in DC proper,
the day after the event on Memorial Day.
Went out and just checked in.
Had a great time with her.
She apparently was a former tour guide.
So I learned a lot about Washington Monument
and all the other things
that I haven't really learned before.
And I was like, oh, this is actually really cool.
We even sang on the date randomly,
Bohemian Rhapsody,
thought it was a really great date,
exchanged phone numbers,
gave her a peck on the cheek
because she was like,
can I have a kiss before I go?
I was like, sure.
And never heard from her again.
So it was like, whatever.
I don't read into it.
I'm not fixated on,
but, but, but, this didn't work out
or that didn't work out.
It was just like, hey, you know what?
I got to experience a nice date with someone as a rep.
Got to learn a little bit more about myself
and how I am in crowds still.
Like I'm a lot better than I was,
but still kind of a little bit anxious.
Like, you know, a fair amount of it
is actually you learning about yourself in these reps.
It's not just going out and doing it
and being like, oh, hey, I did one rep today.
I did 2000 reps today.
It's more about like that artwork
and that introspection of,
hey, you know, when I'm presented with this,
here's how I react or respond.
When this situation comes up,
here's a little bit more in-depth about me.
Like even with this girl that I'm pursuing now,
just talking with me on the phone
after she asked me about trust and relationships
and this relationship that I had years ago,
that I like, I must have blocked out in my mind
that I completely forgot about doing my heart work
and it's stuff that since then,
I've gone back and prayed over
and prayed for that person in that relationship
where someone basically stole stuff from me
during the relationship
and it made me super paranoid
that I couldn't trust anyone in a relationship.
But like, for some reason, I just started sharing it.
almost like a trauma dump, but it was like,
like she asked specifically like,
whoa, what was the first relationship you had
when you got out of the army?
And I shared and I'm like, oh yeah, ooh.
Maybe I shouldn't have shared that,
but she prayed for me instantly over the phone.
And it just made me that much more.
No, and that's a really good point.
There's a couple of things that I wanna pull out of that.
Like David had a great date, went great,
and then nothing, right?
So you know, you guys like online dating world,
like you never know, right?
Like, you know, so don't, until it's something,
don't make something of it, but like just flow with it.
But also I think he makes it,
Jackie talks about what's broken in relationship
is healed in relationship, right?
Like, and so sometimes like just getting out there,
like the first time, first person I dated after,
I mean, I hadn't dated anybody since my ex
in like 25 years, right?
And the first date I went on, I started disassociating,
which I was, which was really crazy, you know?
And I was like, and so it, you know,
a lot of times what's revealed is to be healed.
So when things come up like that,
I realized that she's triggering some trauma in me.
And you know, when you, okay, you guys,
when you're triggered, there's something in you.
It's your responsibility to deal with the trigger.
It's not theirs.
They can be gentle and kind and work
and do their best to work around it,
but it's your job to get that.
I just posted something on Facebook.
It was like talking about like,
it's like an explosive trap in you
and you need to disarm it, right?
And which I thought was a really good analogy.
And it's based on pain, based on something.
I was disassociating because I had a trauma.
And if you have a female relationship
and then you start a new female relationship,
your subconscious just sees female relationship.
They don't see person.
So you could have three different women in your life,
but your subconscious is only recognizing
that this is a love interest.
So if you have a bad experience with a love interest,
that's all your subconscious is basically trying
to guard you in your next relationship.
And there was a time where I actually had to say,
I had to distinguish so my subconscious could change.
I would have to say, this person is not this person.
So my mind would consciously flip.
And I had to do, I was doing that like for the,
at the beginning, 10 or 20 times a day
because it would come up and my mind
and my body would have a reaction.
And then I was able to distinguish,
my brain was able to distinguish
that this isn't that person.
So I don't know if that sounds like it was important
for somebody like, and it's the same with women.
Like your subconscious is there, it's programmed
by your life.
And if things have hurt you,
that's why the heart work is so important.
And David, I love that you brought that up.
Like there's things that your subconscious stuffs,
that you're really not even aware of.
And then you get into a situation and all of a sudden,
hello, it's there, revealed to be healed.
And everything, and you guys, I've been through so much.
There's nothing that God can't heal.
And I'm glad you guys are all doing the heart work.
And if you guys ever need to reach out,
I'm pretty good at, I've done a lot of trauma therapy,
like personally, and I know the struggle,
but I can tell you that I had so much PTSD that's gone.
I mean, I used to not be able to walk through the mall
without freaking out.
I couldn't have anybody behind me.
Right, and now I'm walking around the mall
and I don't even care who's behind me,
which is, it's kind of surreal, but like how God heals.
Right, and so, and that's such a good thing.
I love that, David, that I don't love that it brought it up,
but I'm glad that, like, no,
absolutely, because I used to not be able to walk
into Costco unless it was like 30 minutes
before it closed, brother.
And a lot of stuff's changed.
I'd say more stuff changed in the last year
since starting heart work that like,
it opened up areas that needed healing
that I didn't even recognize needed healing, you know?
And, but even more so than that,
it changed how I approach dating.
I don't know if it was David or Jackie saying it,
but the second I heard that, you know,
marriage is a spiritual responsibility,
sex in marriage is a spiritual act.
And all of a sudden I was like.
I have been dating wrong for the last.
However long I've been dating.
No, it's intensely spiritual.
That's why it's so painful when you break up.
I mean, you can glue in two boards together and you rip them apart.
They're going to be splintered.
That's why breaking soul ties is really important, because when you have sex,
you have soul ties that you're generating, and I think Jackie goes in.
You guys, the heart work, just so you know, it's not just, hey,
I got to do the heart work to get into the into the course, right?
No, the heart work is something that
when these things come up, you just go back to the heart work.
OK, I'll do this. This is all right.
And it's a tool to extract all the junk that has happened in your life.
Right. And and there's
the coaches, there's a lot of.
There are Jackie's really about getting
people free, right, and helping people get free.
She's really helped me like the heart work.
There was a gal.
I was stuck on for like a year and a half.
I couldn't I did I did everything I could
to try to, like, put it put it behind me and I couldn't.
And then I went through the heart work and it broke.
And I was one of you know, and I've I've done a lot of inner healing
and the way Jackie consolidates a lot of different modalities is really,
really spectacular, is really good.
So anybody have any questions about heart work?
Well, I'm here.
Like.
I notice that
so also, but I also wanted to let go of the lost and worshiping the partner,
because your contentment comes from the Lord, not with being with some way,
because when you want somebody in a relationship all this time, I've been
wanting to date someone because I treated at first I thought it was a goal
for personal growth. Later, I see that you got time on there
and there's any and you got to make the most of it with age.
You got to make the most of your time in life.
Life's short, you got to make the most of it.
So I treated like a aging rat race to get it done, to get it done, like homework.
See, but Hunter, Hunter, OK.
So, you know, like.
And if you're running a rat race, if you're running into a relationship
because you're in this, I have a rat race, like it's not a rat race.
It's a divine orchestration, like, you know,
like I see so many people rush into relationships because I need to be
in a relationship. If you're in a place where you're like,
I need to be in a relationship, then you should not be in a relationship.
You need to be content in you because
a relationship is only going to exacerbate the issues.
Right. And now I'm not saying that you have
having a desire is bad. That's not what I hear me.
That's not what I'm saying.
But if you have this compulsion and this need to absolutely be in a relationship,
you're going to be open, opening yourself up to myriads of issues
and connecting with somebody who is really not good for you.
And the other thing about heartwork, David, and like I used to call it,
I need to fix the crazy in me that's attracted to the crazy in others.
Like there's pieces of me that are like,
I really want that person who's really bad for me.
What is in me that is actually desiring that? Right.
And so I had to look back at my do my heartwork.
Right. And I'm like, oh, that's because of this.
And then I fix that crazy.
And because you get two crazy things together and it isn't it isn't beautiful.
I mean, God can make anything work more or less.
But I would I want you guys to win.
Right now.
Hey, James. Hey, I'm going to.
Hey, James, did you have a question?
I thought I saw you reaching.
I was going to say something real quick, but oh, go ahead.
You start talking, you go.
OK, yeah, I was just wondering about the
like, you know, I guess spiritual strings like disconnecting them, like maybe.
Oh, you're talking like the soul ties.
Yeah. Yeah.
What's involved in that or what is that?
Basically, OK, so like,
you know, let me grab my phone real quick.
I actually have a really good app.
There's nothing in ministry.
Anyways,
I really like this this model breaking so tight.
Right. You guys mind if I just read this to you guys?
So you guys have an idea, right?
In the name of Jesus, I break the power of all ungodly spiritual spirit.
and bodily ties forged between the person and me.
Do you guys actually, you know what, if you want, like here, how about, if there's things
that, let's just give it a second, and then I'll read this, and you guys don't have to
acknowledge that you're doing it or not, but maybe there's somebody in your life that you
think you might have a soul tie with, let's just break it today.
How's that?
Right?
Like, so, Jesus, would you just reveal to all these guys what, if any, soul ties they
need to break?
And bring that name to mind right now in Jesus' name.
All right, so, and I bless all of you, I'm gonna, I bless all you guys' spirits to lead
your soul, body, and mind and connect with the Holy Spirit as he leads you into all truth.
And right now, so you guys, to yourself, you can mute yourself or whatever, but if you
want to pray this prayer, in the name of Jesus, I break the power of all ungodly spirit, soul,
and bodily ties forged between the person that came to mind and me.
By power of the cross, I send back to that person all parts of her that she gave to me
that never belonged to me.
And I take back from her all the parts of me that I gave to her that never belonged
to her.
Father, I ask you set a guard over my spirit, soul, and body to never again connect with
that person in this ungodly way.
I nail to the cross the lie that joining with this person in any of these ungodly ways was
necessarily needed or wanted on my part.
I break all agreements I've made with this lie, known or unknown, and I turn away from
joining with it.
Father, as you send this lie away from me, what is the truth about the situation you
want to know?
What, Father, what is the situation, the truth about the situation you want these men to
know?
Lord, I just bless their bodies to be reintegrated with, and the other individuals to be integrated
well that their spirits would become whole, each man would become more whole.
And that if you reveal any more, like, Lord, if there's anything more that you would reveal
so they can come into the fullness and wholeness of who you've made them to be.
And we just say your past does not determine your future.
Your past does not determine your future.
We thank you, Jesus, that you set the captives free.
And we just, you're amazing, Jesus.
We love you.
Amen.
All right.
Was that helpful, guys?
Sorry.
That was, that was, so I had to do that with this girl, right?
And we weren't intimate, but like, just, just, so that's a whole nother, that's another point
is sometimes you can have a connection and you develop a soul tie, right?
Like, you know what I mean?
It's an, if it's an intense connection.
And so, I mean, we only got a couple more minutes.
Hey, I was just going to chime in real quick.
Was that James that asked about the soul ties?
Yeah.
Somewhere on the app, I think it's on either the replays or the like resources.
There's a lesson about the soul ties.
And if I remember correctly, there's either like a Word doc attachment or in the lesson
description there are a couple of different variations of what we just went through.
So if it's something you wanted to repeat for yourself, it is available on the app somewhere.
Thank you, Daniel.
Yeah.
Awesome.
I knew it was, I didn't know where to point it out to, but yeah.
I got you.
It's amazing.
You know, you guys are all, you guys are all phenomenal.
I want to say like many men wouldn't even bother being on this and whoever you end up
marrying is going to be far better for all the work that you're doing.
And I just want to applaud you for that, right?
It's you guys, you don't have to be perfect.
You just need to know when you blow it and repair.
You know, that's another thing.
Okay.
So when I talked about the women's need for safety, it's not that you have to be perfect
and you're going to blow it.
I just hope you guys know, but what do you do?
What makes a safe person is not that they make mistakes, that they don't make mistakes.
It's what they do when they do make the mistakes.
Do they own their stuff?
Do they come back and they repair?
Are they looking to do something different or to, so it doesn't happen again.
Right.
You know, I mean, and I know this, a lot of this is probably review because you guys are
all pretty brilliant, but I just, you know, I need to, I need to tell this to me too,
because I got to remember, like, I don't have to be perfect.
I just have to own my stuff when I miss, right?
And really you guys, you don't have to be perfect for love.
I just want you guys to let that settle in.
You don't have to be perfect to be loved.
And you're already perfectly loved by the Father
and the Son and the Holy Spirit, right?
I just wanna, you know, and I love you all.
And like I say, if you ever need to reach out, hit me up.
You know, because I'm here for, we want,
the whole point of this group is that you guys win, right?
And you know, that's why we celebrate our wins
and we try to encourage.
And Abram, I love you, bro.
I just, yeah.
And be there for each other when we can,
and to the best way.
It's kind of hard.
I wish we were all local where I could like,
we could hang out and play some football or something.
I don't know.
But like, the reality is we're all family, right?
And you know, and David, I love that you're winning
and that the Lord's, the Lord is healing your PTSD
and he's healing all the things that the enemy,
the way the enemy has bound you and he's setting you free.
And it's beautiful.
A soul tie can be something somebody said when you,
oh, so yeah, that's a word curse too.
Yeah, so, okay.
So there, okay.
So there's soul ties where you like have a connection
with somebody and then there's word curses.
Like when some, like my stepdad said,
you're a piece of whatever
and you'll never amount to anything.
That is a word curse.
And you can, in the way we broke the soul tie,
you can actually break word curses.
But I would also encourage you,
whatever the lie was in that word curse,
find the truth in God's word that counters it.
Because he always comes at your identity.
And the God says, you're amazing.
God says, you're his masterpiece, right?
The devil says, you're junk.
God says, you're my masterpiece.
The devil points out your sin.
The father says, you're a son, right?
Yeah, not that he's a fan of sin,
but he loves you as a son, right?
When my sons blow it, I'm like, not really super excited.
Right?
Because like I can tell you,
my boys are really kind of having issues right now.
My love never changes for my boys.
Now I have sadness.
I grieve because I can see
that there's gonna be consequences to their actions.
And I try to encourage them to make better choices.
But the reality is, is I love them.
And I'm an earthly father who's broken
and like doing his best.
Our heavenly father loves us with a perfect love.
And perfect love casts out all fear.
So I just wanna encourage you guys.
You're amazing.
You're all world-changing.
Anybody have anything before we close out?
I'd like-
Yeah, I was just gonna add that the thing
that you're working on or the thing
that you're having a win over
in your own personal prayer life is honestly the stuff
that your future spouse is praying for,
for her own security in her future husband.
And perfect example, about two months back,
I started working on not using profanity anymore.
And all of last week, three weeks of not cussing came out
in about 30 seconds of trying to close on a house.
Yeah.
But, you know, work in progress.
It's about progress, not perfection.
Absolutely.
And the tongue's never truly gonna be tamed,
but I can still put in the work on it.
The young lady I'm pursuing does not like dark humor,
does not stand for any man that uses profanity.
And I told her, I'm working on it.
Like, you'll never hear me cuss, honestly.
Like, if I cuss, it's gonna be out in the middle
of the woods or around a group of other vets.
But even then, it's like, they know that I'm trying
to work on not using profanity
and they all give me a hard time about it.
And I think you made a really good point.
Like, you know, a lot of our future spouses
are praying for us, right?
And when we allow God to do, like doing the hard work
and you're doing the hard work.
Hard work stinks, guys.
I don't know about you, but like going through my crap,
I don't really, it's not something where I'm like,
hey, look, it's Disneyland, right?
But yet I'm free and I'm becoming whole and wholer.
And then looking for somebody who is whole.
Remember I said the crazy and fix the crazy in me
so I don't not attract it.
So when you're 50% of a person because of all your trauma,
and then the other person is a 50% of a person,
two 50%s make 100%, but you're looking for 200, right?
So, you know, you're looking,
I want your 50% fixes my 50%.
No, that's a recipe for disaster.
Two 80s is amazing because you guys can work out the other 20% together.
Does that make sense?
By doing the hard work, and I guess what I'm trying to equate that,
doing the hard work gets you to the 80, to the 90, ideally to the 100.
I don't know if you can get 100 on this side of heaven, but I'm going to try.
And if we can help you in any way, I mean, if I can help you in any way,
hit me up and I'll be glad to.
I'm going to pray.
Real quick, Mike, just to share this one thing,
because you missed out on it from like two weeks ago when I was on,
and Abram as well, because he wasn't there.
He said yes to a pig fight.
Y'all are invited to the wedding.
No, you talked about that last week.
We got that, you know.
Well, Abram wasn't there, so I have to re-admit it.
All things are possible, but not all things are profitable, David.
A cake fight off of a wedding cake is a wedding cake
that makes memories forever.
It pays dividends on itself.
Buy ponchos.
Put it over the dress.
Do something, please.
Or bring a change of clothes.
Yeah, and do it again.
Why would I do that?
Before we close out, everybody good?
Yes.
Another thing is I asked about being on the spotlight,
and I want to know.
Hey, Hunter, I am not in charge of any of that stuff,
so hit Jackie up or admin at JackieDorman.com.
That's outside of my purview.
I thought you were the job coach.
I asked you about it, but they said you have to get a job.
We're working on that, but there's some semantics.
Ask Jackie.
We've had a couple of conversations about it.
My life has been pretty insane the last several months.
It's been pretty rough.
I haven't really been in a place where I could actually be helped.
I guess I can always be helpful.
I want you to have 100% of me,
not the one that's been beat up.
Email the admins.
Anytime you guys have any questions,
admin at JackieDorman.com.
You can get one-on-one coaching.
I had a relationship that I had issues with.
I had questions about it.
I actually paid and met with Jackie,
and it was super helpful.
She's also very straight to the point.
She says the truth in love,
but she's the matchmaker and the matchbreaker.
She says that.
I actually needed it to be broken.
Lord Jesus, I just thank you for every one of these men.
I just pray that your love would surround them as a shield
and that you would guide them into the fullness of who they are
and the fullness of the identity as their sonship
and that they would really feel your love as a son.
I just pray that all of our future spouses,
Lord, and the ladies in our group would be getting to wholeness too.
All the guys who are going to watch this future,
I just pray for their wholeness and their future spouses as well.
My heart's desire is that this whole group would turn into a marriage
group instead of a singles group,
and we would all get to just be married couples talking
and communing together.
Lord, I just pray you protect them as they go.
Give them wisdom.
Give them strength.
Give them courage.
Lord, I just pray that every person here would have an opportunity
to take one or two shots this week and that they would sink them
and that next week we would have a lot of wins.
Lord, we love you,
and we just thank you for all the work that you're doing
and that you came to set us free.
We love you, Jesus.
Amen.
Love y'all.
You're amazing.
Keep it up, dude.
You're awesome.
Thanks.
Love y'all.
Bye.
Thank you.