then turn off the video and then we'll then we'll have them over it, or answer a question.
Hello.
How's it going?
Good how are you?
Doing good it's been a while since we visited.
How is your business going.
I've been seeing lots of activity.
Yeah it's going well I just ran a five-day self-love challenge this week which was really
good.
It was my first time doing one so I was kind of like in this place of kind of like a love
offering with it like to really help the women who were coming in and if anyone wanted to
work with me afterwards that was cool but I really sort of wanted it to be a place where
I came from trust and love and yeah you know not with an expectation of anything necessarily
which I know we're sort of taught in business to you know set intention about how many people
you want to like buy your program and all this stuff but I'm like I'm like what if I
just come from love and and like wanting to give and then you know God's gonna do what
he's gonna do so that's what I did.
Great I'm so glad I'm so glad so how many people are in the group?
Well I have about in the group I have about 440 I think but in the challenge itself I
think I had maybe about 20 like hardcore participants.
So that was my first one so I was pretty happy with that and then I thought you know yeah
it just it just was like a different come from than I've done in the past I think not
that I've done a challenge but just not putting pressure on myself and every once in a while
I could feel that pressure rise like I should be selling something after this I should be
doing this for a reason and then I'm like stop.
That's right I know just just let that let the spirit flow and then the Lord is going
to call you know it's going to resonate with you he intends it to resonate with and they
have to make an intentional decision and then it means that the people who are attracted
are going to be easier to work with because they make the choice for themselves they weren't
sold on it they had to pursue it and yeah I think that's wonderful that's great.
Yeah it's good and and I mean you're doing a five-day thing right now and you know it's
really interesting because the last like it was like a few weeks before we before I think
you messaged me and we had had that like thing where I had booked a call and you'd missed
it somehow so I around that time it was weird because I felt like this shift in I felt like
something was happening in your life I felt like there was like a shift in you or something
that was going on in your life that was like changing which was weird because I was like
that's odd like I wonder why I'm thinking that so I was I was praying for you and I'm
like okay God I don't know what this is but I feel like something's shifting in her life
and so I was praying for you and then you reached out and you said that you are starting
to charge for sessions now and you are doing this like five-day rest intensive so I wondered
if that was something that was like kind of percolating a little bit at that time where
you were sort of like looking at what was shifting maybe I don't know.
Yes yes it was so very sensitive to the spirit so that's that's incredible yeah I've been
doing a lot of shifting but yeah there was that was that was a shifting time and one
of the things that I was thinking about is how do I want to change things that I do how
do I want to change my business from what I've been doing and so in order to do it because
I just felt from the Lord that there needed to be a shift but I was trying to determine
well so what does that shift mean what does it look like I don't want it to change I like
it is but I just felt that there was something that needed to so so it's like okay so I need
to look at it I so I reviewed the past year and the shifts that that had been made and
how things had gone and everything had gone really really well I was very pleased with
it and then there were just some things that just kind of just were highlighted to me things
that I had not felt peace to do before I had not felt peace to charge for the consultations.
even after the four weeks.
So currently I'm still offering,
people join Rest Intensive on the 30 day
to still offer the free four consultations,
one per week for the first four weeks.
But then after that, I've decided, okay, to charge for those
and I'd never felt peace to do that before.
And so I'd continue to offer them, tell everyone,
hey, if y'all feel like you need one,
please understand that you have the opportunity
and to reach out and schedule one.
And so this is the first time that I'd suddenly felt
that I needed to, that it would be healthy
for just the situation for myself, for other people,
whatever, to start charging.
And anyway, so that's what I'm doing.
I haven't announced it in the group yet,
but I've just been telling individuals.
I just need to like write it all up
and have everybody all hear the same write-up,
same information.
But yeah, that's what I'm doing.
That's what I'm doing now.
So there was that, just personal stuff that's going through,
but obviously the business is an extension of the personal
because the business is me, so to speak.
It's my spirit flowing into the world in a particular way.
And so it's just the, I was making some tweaks
as to the structure of how all of that works.
And I still am.
After the five-day intensive, I'm now wondering,
just like I shifted into the group program,
what this shows me that I now wanna do moving forward.
So I'm looking at that.
Again, all moving in even more healthy directions.
So it's not like, oh, getting rid of something
that was really good.
No, it's moving things into healthier directions.
How do I help people?
How do I help people more?
How can I help them shift faster, more effectively?
And what things end up helping people more than others?
And so I need to not offer the things
that aren't helping people as much.
And what's the timeframe and what, anyway.
So, and apparently the five-day thing
really got people's attention because it was,
it felt, I think, more doable, more consumable
than hearing the word, hearing the number 30, 30 days.
So anyway, just still looking at that.
It was just a lot of information to put into five days.
And I'm not offering private consultations
during that time.
So I really want people to know
that these experiences that y'all've had
have been because you've chosen
and you've had time to process these things with the Lord
and make choices.
It's not simply, oh, I heard a lesson.
I'm totally changed.
You know, you actually have to internalize it
and follow through with it in the Lord.
And there's reasons why we've said no up to this point.
So there's a process of getting to the point
where we feel safe enough with the Lord to say yes.
And so much of that happens after five days.
A lot of shifting can happen in five days.
And it has even with people who join the 30-day intensive.
But anyway, I'm just trying to,
looking at how things have gone in five days
and figuring out what it is that I liked
and wanted to tweak.
And it all went well, just figuring out, okay,
how do I, what can maybe, I don't know,
provide people with something even more valuable.
So yeah.
So for you, why did you start the five day?
Because you said you've never done one.
I thought you've done a five day though before.
Maybe not a love challenge, but you haven't.
I haven't done a five day before.
But I, before we shift over to me,
I still want to, I want to hear a little bit more.
I'm super curious to know about you.
Okay.
I want to shift.
That's very sweet.
I know, usually you ask about me more than anybody else.
You're so sweet.
Oh, I love hearing about you.
I love just hearing you speak
and like hearing what's on your heart.
And, you know, I'm so curious,
like the whole shift that came in for you
with your business and like, you know,
deciding to charge and all of that,
did it come from like feeling like you were spread
a little bit too thin or feeling like you thought
it might like help people if they were to invest
in themselves more?
Like what, what kind of was behind that?
I'm super curious.
Excuse me.
I noticed that there was an extent to which it was effective
but if people knew that it was available,
then it subconsciously, do you, oh, how would,
okay, I know what I'm trying to say.
How do I say it?
It would,
They, they did you articulated it well, they, there was a way in which they started leaning
on me a little bit too much, not extreme understand because there are other ways and people in
which people like go to counselors, for instance, and they just go to just get to have somebody
listen to them and somehow they expect after they're going to spend all this time venting
that one day magically they're going to change and feel better, as opposed to taking ownership
of their, of their own lives.
So it wasn't that extreme.
It was just that I noticed that there were that subconsciously they were just kind of
like, okay, well, well, Ashley's always there.
And, and even though they were taking on ownership between them and the Lord, I noticed that
the people that shifted the fastest were the ones who didn't reach out as often.
I worked really hard to make sure it wasn't going to flip out.
I have used this stand for so long that I think that the, that the padding in it on
the sides is like, has like really just kind of packed in so it doesn't make as tight of
a clip as it needs to.
So my dad, that would be very good at helping me like get some like foam to replace it with.
I'm going to go get a nice pack.
No, no, it's funny.
I, and, and you know what, like that, I hear you because I get that same experience with
certain clients who are like really reliant on me and it's like this gradual release of
responsibility.
Yes.
It's a gradual release.
It's not immediate, but it is gradual because they're like, it's always there.
Yeah.
Pardon?
It's subconscious.
They don't mean to, people don't mean to.
Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
And I think it's, I think that makes so much sense.
It's like, you know, they get that autonomy and if they know you're always there, they
might end up leaning on you a lot.
Now, I guess I'm curious when you say that, and you're always welcome to be like a hundred
percent honest with me.
I love honesty.
Would you say, was I one of the people who you thought was kind of leaning on you a lot?
I think that you are one of those people that has really owned all of this with, with
the Lord.
Tremendous.
Yeah.
I believe that you're one of those people that has really, that has really owned it
between you and the Lord.
As far as whether or not you were leaning on me in any way that you, that you believe
was unhealthy that way or not unhealthy, but that, that felt like you were releasing
as I don't know, almost like that there.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why.
I apparently may drink more coffee.
I don't know why I can think of what I'm trying to say in my head and it's not coming out.
So point is basically short version is that is something that I do not know.
That would be, that would be you to know as to whether or not, and I would actually
be very curious.
That would give me good feedback.
Talking to someone who's, who's very open and honest as in very, very self aware if
what you think about my thoughts as far as, and I understand you can only speak for your
experience versus like all of these other people, but I've had multiple people that
just really have, I don't know that I had multiple people that really started leaning
on me and whether or not that's one that you were one of those people, I don't, I don't
know to what extent that you felt that it happening.
What are your thoughts on it?
Yeah, that's interesting.
So if I were to kind of like analyze my experience, I think, I think when I met you, your wisdom
and insight on like rest was so different from anything I'd experienced that I was like
almost like a sponge, right?
Like I'm watching videos and I'm just like taking it all in.
It was like when I first became a Christian, just like I went to three church services
every weekend cause I was just like a sponge and I, I loved it.
I loved the information.
I loved practicing rest.
I was like, I can do this.
I can do everything for, I can run a marathon from rest, right?
Like anything can be done from rest.
And so I enjoyed, I think I enjoyed you.
Like I enjoyed talking to you.
I enjoyed, I enjoyed your like, I think for a while too, I was sort of in this place of
really trying to figure out what to do with the whole cult experience.
And it all kind of came to a head when I had the opportunity to, to speak at, like
April spoke out, the leader ended up contacting her because she was speaking out.
I was speaking out, but behind the scenes.
I was passing the information and April was the one who was speaking out about it more.
And so I got to this point where I was like, do I want to keep pursuing this?
Or is this like healthy for me?
Remember, we were talking about that.
And I was like, I don't know if I should just move forward with my life or if I have a mission
to help these people.
And at one point, I had the opportunity to message a whole bunch of the people who are
now like working for free that are setting up these personal masteries, which is the
first weekend.
And I had it all kind of planned out how I was going to reach out and I talked to April
about it.
I talked to some other friends about it.
And within about three hours, and I don't know if I don't think I don't remember if
I talked to you about it.
I think that was the night I was going to jump on the call and ask you about it.
But I ended up asking three other friends about April, my chiropractor, who I just talked
to about everything.
And she's so great.
She's so wise.
And I love her.
I talked to the hairdresser.
Oh, yeah.
It's like our version of a bartender.
Totally, totally.
And I have a friend who's a licensed clinical social worker in Manhattan.
So she's a friend of mine, too.
So I talked to all of them about what I was thinking about doing.
And none of them would have talked to each other.
But within about three hours, each of them said to me, I don't think it's safe for you
to do that.
I don't think that you should put yourself out there that way.
You've got a daughter to protect.
You've got a family.
Don't mess with them that way.
Because you're messing with darkness.
You're messing with evil.
And I think you and I had touched on this a little bit, but it was like, you need to
protect yourself in a sense.
You need to think about what can happen if you were to really go there.
You think it will be relatively okay, but you don't know what they're capable of.
And I was like, yeah, you know what?
It actually struck me.
And the fact that three people said it, and these three people I've talked to about this
situation multiple times, like I have with you.
So for them to all say it within three hours, I was just kind of shocked by it.
And then I thought, you know what?
Maybe it is better if I just move forward and that I don't put my effort and energy
into helping those people because maybe it's not my mission.
Maybe I need to just stay in the light and not go back and back and forth from the light
to the darkness to try to help people.
It's almost like you get out of a brothel, but you want to go back to the brothel and
rescue the other girls, right?
And that's how I felt.
And then I'm like, but every time I go back to the brothel, I'm going into the darkness
again.
So do I want to keep going into the darkness or do I want to focus on the light?
So finally, with that experience, and then a few other things that happened, I had this
experience.
I had so many experiences, it was crazy.
God just kept revealing more and more things to me.
And finally, I just shifted, I shifted out of that place of needing to help them and
almost in a sense, like needing to matter that way, like, okay, maybe God will use me
this way.
I'm like, you know, God can use me by just being, but I didn't see that.
My chiropractor was saying that to me, she's like, he's using you by just being you.
You don't need to do anything.
I'm like, I know, it's so true.
But at the time, I just kept thinking I needed to do something.
So I've really just been in this place of being.
And so when you and I were talking to bring it back to that, like, I think I was gaining
so much wisdom and insight from the things you were like, helping me understand about
just all of that situation, which was so complicated for me at the time that I think I reached
out to you because I saw you as someone who was just really easy to talk to about.
And every time I came away from a conversation, I was like, yeah, I feel like I've got, I'm
getting deeper into why I'm feeling this way and like how to get out of it, how to
be at rest.
And so, yeah, I, that's, I think that's what I did because of what I was going through,
but I always knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel and that it would just like
eventually shift.
I was just kind of like, kind of gathering the wisdom, I guess, I'm like, okay, God,
you know, you've got something in this for me, your spirits working through her in my
life.
And I'm just like, soaking it up a little, you know?
Yeah.
I'm so glad.
I am so excited.
Oh my word.
You have no idea.
There are so many things.
There's a, there's at least, you're, you're at least the second really big thing, you
know, really big story and testimony that I have heard.
or the past, oh, maybe it's two days.
Maybe the other one I heard was yesterday.
I mean, there have been some major things
that people have been talking about.
They're like, oh my word, Ashley, I shifted like this.
And I think yours is the second one
that I have really, really been wanting someone to get
and to understand that I kept trying to express
and figuring and trying to understand
how I could express it.
So many times, you know, when we would have this conversation
I'd be like, okay, she needs to know that she can just be,
that she doesn't have to like do it and whatever.
But I would try to say it as best as I could
without coming out and saying it too much
because, or too hard,
because I know being in your situation,
and maybe you're not like this,
but when I've been in your situation,
people have talked to me,
I was not in a situation to hear it without being hurt.
I would hear it and I'm like,
I'm actually, instead of helping me,
my feelings are now hurt.
And so I was like, she needs to hear it from the Lord.
She needs to understand that from the Lord.
So I can like, I can like give her ideas
that she can latch onto if she chooses
and that her spirit and her soul can work on it
while she's not conscious of it.
But I didn't wanna say too much,
because again, I didn't wanna hurt your feelings
and the fact that it can do damage
because with your heart
and what you were wanting to do is good, you know?
But if you can, but in that place,
if people have this really sweet
and tender heart before the Lord,
and then they hear a different perspective of,
oh, but you know that you don't have to,
and you, whatever,
it can be heard through a filter
that instead of hearing it as encouragement,
the encouragement that it actually is,
it actually hurts.
And it does, it creates the opposite effect
of what it is I'm trying to say.
And I did that with someone,
with one of the other clients in Rest Intensive.
There was something I had not only been wanting them
to understand, but multiple women in the group
to understand.
And I've been talking to all of them about it,
but I've tried to be very careful about how I do it
because if I came across a different way,
and trust me, I've done this by experience.
If I push a little too hard and like really,
but you know, their feelings get hurt.
I mean, majorly.
And then it starts doing damage, internal damage,
and because they can only receive it as self-condemnation
of, oh, I'm not heading in the right direction.
Something's wrong, something bad.
And I'm like, no, that's not what I'm saying.
That's the only way that they can hear it.
So I heard from them yesterday that the Lord told them
and finally got them to shift
and finally got them to understand
something about in their life.
They're like, oh my word, Ashley,
I didn't know life could be this great.
And I'm like, I'm so excited.
But so the thing is, this is why I keep telling people,
I can't fix it for them.
I can just present different things to them,
but I want them to always, and the hard part,
the really hard part of where that shifting happens
and where it's hard to let go
and where, yeah, there might be a bit of pain
and a bit of hurt.
I want as much as possible
for that to happen between them and the Lord.
And because I want to provide them with a safe place,
a safe place that's speaking the truth,
but as much as possible sees the filter
through which they're gonna hear something it is that I say
and me try to avoid saying it at a time
where it actually hurts instead of helps
simply because of where they are
and how they're hearing it.
So I understand that people have to say hard things
sometimes, but I have this balance
that I'm trying to make of like,
yeah, but they're not even gonna hear it
as a positive thing.
They're actually not in a place to hear it
and it would hurt.
This is the wrong time.
And I want to be safe
because the kindness of God leads to repentance.
And I wanna look like my father as much as possible.
Now, if he tells me to really say something,
I have said it before,
but just generally as much as possible,
I just follow the Lord's spirit.
Okay, Lord, are they open enough to hearing this or not?
Cause I want them to always feel safe
because the more someone feels safe,
the more that they feel safe to step out into change
and the more safe that they feel
to step out into letting go.
If they don't feel safe where they are,
they're not gonna feel safe letting go.
And the Lord just has put it on my heart
that the vast majority of the experience
that I have with other people,
90, 95% of my interactions with people.
um, with my clients is to speak it in such a way where there's, they still walk away
hearing the truth, but feeling safe.
And that's just what the, the, my ministry is, so to speak is providing safety because
so many other places in life, they're going to hear truth without safety and they reject
it.
So anyway, I'm so excited because only the Lord can reveal those things to our spirit.
This was between you and the Lord, and I just, I just, um, tried to fill the place
that the Lord said, Ashley, this is your place and this one isn't.
And so anyway, I feel like, I feel like you're so right.
Like he, he like changes my, he changes me, but I really feel like he works through people
too.
Like, I feel like he gives people a sense of his spirit and like the ability to speak
into, like, I feel like he gave you, for example, like the ability to like, be sensitive
to the spirit too, and know like, what do people need to hear?
What's going to help them feel safe and supported?
What's too much?
Like you're good at kind of like downloading kind of on a vertical level and going at it
from giving it a horizontal level in a sense, right?
Like you, you kind of do that download and let it flow.
And I feel like that for me, it was beautiful because, I mean, I'm pretty good at hearing
the truth and like moving through it, but, but that, that whole cult experience was so,
I was so sensitive.
I was so, um, broken.
Understandably.
Yeah.
It was hard.
It was a tough one.
And I feel like the, um, the bondage of it has been broken, which is, yeah, it's huge.
It was, it was huge.
It was huge.
Cults are powerful.
The powers of darkness, very powerful.
And I felt like I was in bondage to the darkness still, and I didn't know how to escape it.
I didn't know how to get out of it.
And so it was really helpful to kind of hear your insight because I was just ingesting
it like a sponge, just trying to allow the Holy Spirit to change me, to do something
in me, to help me shift out of wanting to go back and like help people because it's
still going back, you know, no matter what way you look at it, whether I'm going back
to help people or going back in myself, I'm going back.
And so it's like a dog going back to its vomit, right.
And so it could be a mission, but my mission, like, I realized my mission got to look a
little different and it was supposed to be a mission that was moving forward from that
into the light instead of moving back into it in any way.
And so yeah, thinking about being, being me, like I thought if I don't do something, I'm
not helping the situation, but being me, allowing God to like guide me and help me through it
and like send the right people into my life to help me gain that insight and awareness
and be able to shift.
It was like a really cool combination.
So I'm really, really thankful because that was a, I was in a lot of bondage to that,
but just coming out of it, I knew God was like revealing amazing things to me and he
has, he's brought me to a whole new level.
Like I don't, I feel cleaner.
I feel like, yeah, I feel like I took an internal shower and it's just like cleaned out.
Oh my word, this is huge.
This is really, really, really huge.
I mean, what you've done and, you know, having the courage to be open to hearing the truth
from the Lord and then leaving the cult and then having courage to, you know, desire to
help them and man, I was encouraged to hear the Lord say, no, you're enough.
You don't need to.
You have the, you have permission to let go and then choosing to let go when so much
was wrapped up in it.
All of that is choosing to release yourself from bondage and, and that those are all huge
major steps and you've done all of them.
So that's just, I don't know, I cannot express how excited I am.
I know I see it in your face, it's so cute.
I love it.
And, and it's like transferred over into every other area because I feel, I know with business
eventually I do need to, you know, bring more money in because it supports me and it pays
for, you know, really like I'm paying money to do this business.
So I want to at least make back what I'm spending.
Right.
And I think, you know, even that I'm coming from a place of like trust and love and rest
and not like forcing it or making it a have to, but just kind of a, well, they
get to do it if they want. I've got this amazing, like program
for them, if they choose it, it's here, I'm like, it's
available to them, and they just get to choose it, instead of you
need to do that, you know? And yeah, exactly. So it's like
shifted into my business, it's shifted in even that situation
about with the teachers at school.
Yes, I wanted to hear about those.
I had Yeah, I had so such an interesting experience. Like
remember, I said it was three teachers. And within, you know,
a couple weeks, like I had them all get upset with like, really
upset with me. The one guy was like, almost shouting at me
about something that made no sense. He was just stressed. My
principal even said, I said to her, could I have done anything
differently? And she's like, No. So she's like, you did
everything fine. He's just really stressed. And I'm going
to move you out of his classroom. So you don't have to
work with them anymore. So it's like, perfect. So that worked
out to have that support. It was I was surprised. I was crying a
lot when I was after it happened, though. So I think my
principal was like, shocked because they don't usually see
me. So I think she understood how how I didn't understand like
what just happened. So there was that and I with him. I've just
left it because I feel like when the time's right, he'll talk to
me or we'll talk. Then there was the other woman who was like
very accusatory and telling like kind of in my face just like
being very, it's kind of like a dictator to me about what I can
and can't do. She's not my like, she doesn't lead me. She's 100%
on the same level as me. She's another teacher, but she had a
very controlling kind of like angry attitude. And then the
other one had heard some incorrect information. And she
was upset with me too. And I was like, this is so messed up.
Like, why? Why is this all happening? And so then the one
teacher, the one woman who was being very accusatory toward me
the next two days later, I was back in her classroom. And I had
found out from my principal just randomly that she was moving me
out of that classroom up into a different classroom. So I was
like, okay, because I get moved around a lot depending on with
COVID. Everything's kind of like moving around a lot. So yeah,
that makes sense. I went to this teacher and she was sitting at
her desk and I knelt down sort of beside her and I said, I
don't know if Linda the principal talked to you yet,
but I'm actually going to be moving out of this classroom.
And I had not seen her talk to her since that conversation. And
in the conversation, I was trying to like show grace and
show, you know, I was literally like talking to myself going, I
know this is about her. I know this is not about me. I can be
kind, I can show love and like, just not retaliating, right?
Because I wanted to. And so this was how long after the the
incident, this was like two days after that incident. So I'm
kneeling on the sort of floor beside her desk. She puts her
hand on my leg after I tell her about this, you know, news about
me getting moved out. She's like, puts her hand on my leg
and she's like, Well, that must have made you pretty happy. That
must have been good news for you. And I was like, Oh, wow,
like she does not feel good about herself. And it was just
eye opening to me. And I was so glad that I was kind to her in
the moment because I realized how sad she was in that moment.
And ever since then, she has been so sweet to me. So nice, so
sweet, like and it just all it was was me just being in a place
of like loving her where she was at being kind and not making it
about me, which I have historically done almost all my
life is made it about something being wrong with me something
that I did wrong, right. And I've started to shift out of
that a lot too. And then the other teacher, we didn't speak
for two weeks. And I went to her and I and when I got moved, I
also got moved to work in the same room as her. I was like, Oh
my gosh. So I went up the first day I was in the room with her
and I said, Hey, maybe we should like have a conversation about
what happened. She's like, you know what, I am so sorry. I was
not in a good place. I should not have treated you that way.
If I wasn't so stressed about these other things, I would
never have reacted that way. And I'm so sorry. And she was so
apologetic. And again, it was just one of those moments where
I thought this isn't about me. This is about other people's
struggles. And I can't make it about me because it's not and my
insecurities in the past would have said it was. And even when
I said to you, like, I think I'm the common denominator here. Why
is this happening? Because it was a lot all of a sudden at
once I thought, what am I doing? But just even your Marco Polo to
me and just your answer about that was so helpful because I
realized, you know, just just being me and not making it about
me and not and just like being with God being in the spirit and
it was it was a big realization.
when you sort of talked about it not being about me.
And you also talked about,
you know, how some people might be in resistance
to me in some way.
And I had never thought about that before.
I thought they would only be in resistance to me
if they didn't like me,
or if I was like mean or something.
I didn't think about them being in resistance
to like the light in somebody.
So when you said that, I was like,
oh, maybe I guess that,
but that was, I guess you're in a sense,
if you were thinking it,
it must have been partially your experience.
Like you must experience some kind of light in me,
I'm guessing, maybe.
Oh yeah.
Okay.
Cause I was like, wow.
And that was huge.
That was huge feedback
because I don't think I see myself that way.
I think I see myself as very normal, very average,
very like, I just go about life.
I don't really think I'm that special in any way.
So when somebody says something like that, I'm like,
really?
Like, is that maybe possible?
So that was huge.
Powerful.
Yeah.
I mean, like what's coming out of us is powerful.
Yeah.
And I guess it's like,
God was just kind of working in me in those moments.
And then a bunch of other little things kind of happened
that all came together and it was just,
yeah, I don't know.
It's been a big shift and it feels good.
I don't like, I mean, we're always on a journey.
We're not, I don't think we've ever arrived.
We're always, you know, shifting interests.
Like I feel like I'm shifting interests a lot faster.
I feel like even my husband,
my husband is a yo-yo dieter and it like makes,
it makes me,
it agitates me because my mom was a yo-yo dieter
and she was so unhealthy and it's a trigger for me.
So when I see him doing that, it just like irks me.
And then, so the other, it was like a week or two ago,
there was a big tub of ice cream in the freezer
that was supposed to be for our daughter.
And when I went to get ice cream for her,
almost the whole thing was gone.
And I was like, did you eat all the ice cream?
And he's like, yep.
And I just didn't say anything.
I just left it.
And it was like a few days later when he said, you know,
I can tell there's something different about you
because you didn't get mad at me about that.
Because normally I'd be like, why did you do that?
You said you wanted to lose weight.
Why are you eating the whole tub of ice cream?
And I didn't.
You're providing him a safe place to be himself.
And when he feels safe, then he can,
then he's like, oh, if I feel safe now,
I can feel safe to change.
Yeah. Yeah.
If he changes.
That's huge.
And it's hard.
It's hard to be in the place where you're at.
It's hard to be that safe place for someone else,
especially if it triggers a wound in ourselves that,
and I'm not saying that,
I'm not saying that you have a wound in this area.
I'm just, it's just something that came to mind
that that is one of the reasons why it's hard
to be a safe place for someone else is,
especially if the play,
the area in which they need to feel safe and not judged
is an area in which we're easily triggered
because that's where our judgment comes from
is a place in which we hold ourselves
to a particular standard.
And it's a judgment that we hold about life
and we hold about ourselves.
And then we have this mirror judgment against someone else.
So anyway, but so my point is to commend you.
That's huge.
Oh, is that kind of like,
I would judge myself for doing that.
So it's kind of like I'm judging him
because I would judge myself?
No, it's not even necessarily,
it doesn't necessarily have to be a,
okay, so yes, but it doesn't have to be a judgment
in that exact same area.
So it doesn't have to be a judgment
as far as like you're thinking,
oh, well, is that like, well, yeah,
I get upset for how, for with myself
and hold myself in judgment against how I,
how I interact with food.
It doesn't have to be in the same area.
It's because what's going on
is deeper than his relationship with food.
It's a wound that he has that he is,
that he is trying to cope with
through his relationship with food.
He could have chosen relationship with something else,
but he's choosing it as a relationship with food.
And so the trigger,
it can just trigger something in us
where we hold ourselves to a particular standard
in a particular amount of discipline in our lives,
something somewhere, and it doesn't have to be food,
something somewhere in which we've had to work hard
to be where we are and to make sure that we stay there
and they're not working hard.
They're not doing what they have to do
and being disciplined enough to do it.
So it doesn't have to be in the same area.
It's just triggering a general judgment
that we have about life.
that we're seeing them fall short of our own standard. And if we're working so hard to do it,
it can, we can just hold other people in judgment that they're not doing what they have to do
in order to get there. So to provide someone else a safe place comes from us putting on our own
oxygen mask first by providing ourselves a safe place in which to be free of our own judgment.
That makes sense because I think, yeah, like I've worked hard to get where I am. I don't,
I don't do stuff like that. I don't overeat. I don't overindulge. I don't drink a whole lot
or anything. Like I might have a glass of wine every once in a while, but not very much.
And he'll like go out and spend $50 at the liquor store and buy a bunch of beer and wine. He'll eat
the whole thing of ice cream. He's like, like I would get irked every time he brought an LCBO,
which is our Canadian version of the liquor stores, like a liquor store bag home. And I'm
like, Oh, you did it again. Like, and I noticed that I was getting frustrated, but I think it's
probably it's so true what you say. Cause I feel like it's well, I work hard to stay as fit as I
can. I mean, there's always room for improvement, but I work hard. I, you know, I work hard to have
a healthy body and a healthy mind. And so I'm very judgmental against him when he says he wants to
lose weight or wants to eat healthy. And then he falls off the wagon every weekend. So, and he's a
great guy. Like it's, he's got so many amazing qualities, but it's just that one bothers me a
lot. Cause then I don't trust him. I don't trust his word. I don't trust that he is going to follow
through on what he says. And I don't know why that's a trigger for me, but I'm like, so I've
been noticing it lately and I thought, well, why am I so concerned about that? And why do I let it
bother me so much? And I wondered if it even came down to like some codependence on like, almost
like some, I don't, I couldn't explain it. You explained it really well with
what you just said about like the judgment thing, but I couldn't understand why I was sort of
having these accusations against him when it's not my place, it's not my right and why it was
irking me because it's obviously like a trigger that comes from somewhere. So yeah, I was playing
around with that a lot too, and just really trying to lay it to rest and just leave it up to God.
Yeah. Yeah. We can feel everything that you said, you know, to be able, like I said, you're always
very, very amazingly insightful and self-aware. You pinpointed it when you were talking about
the fact that, you know, it makes me feel like I can't trust his word. And while we desire
something for someone else, when we find that they're sharing something important with us about
how they want to change and whatever, and then we watch themselves do what in our minds feels like
as continuing to do the same thing and damage themselves, we can, excuse me, because of the
choices that they're making, not because of they're eating something, but they're like,
you're thinking, oh my word, this is the choice. We can feel the reason that we get upset. We think
that it's a loving thing. We think that, well, it's because I care so much about them, but it
really deep down, even though, yes, we do really, really care about them. And yes, that is part of
the struggle. Really deep down, we feel threatened. We feel personally threatened by their action,
whether it be because we hold ourselves to a particular judgment, you know, and particular
standard and it's being mirrored in how we're judging them. But also like what you said,
I feel like I can't trust him. Here's another affirmation. And this is a trigger. And so it's
so funny how one thing here is actually really, this is the problem. And so often, you know,
until we wouldn't normally, until we follow that trail, we wouldn't realize that that's
actually the connection because it seems so, it doesn't, it doesn't seem obvious.
You know, it doesn't seem directly related to the food. It doesn't seem directly related to
the ice cream. It's, but I feel like I can't trust you. If I can't trust you in this, what
else can I trust you with? And our mind just starts going and our emotions start going in
because it's the trigger to all this other stuff that we've shoved up under the rug,
not just in our interaction with that person as an individual, but all of these things that we
have that have piled up under this rug. But that is just another affirmation of, you know, that
maybe started when we were three or five, I can't trust people when they, you know, in my interactions
with them, I don't feel safe with someone else that when I really need them, they're not going
to be there. You know, our mind just takes the ice cream and just goes there or our emotions go,
even without us consciously.
realizing it. So yeah, we can feel, we can feel kind of threatened by that. Another thing to
is that when people do stuff like that, there's, you know, you say that, that he's a, he's a,
you know, just a wonderful, really, really good guy. He might have to work very hard at that
because his own judgment against stuff. Oh, I have to work really hard. I have to be really
disciplined. And this is an area of release. Because everything he's working, all of his
effort and energy is going to hold everything else together. Because again, according to the tree of
the knowledge of good and evil, we can think, and I'm not declaring this over him. I'm saying that
this is a pattern of what you do, of what I do, of what other people do. When we have these,
when we have these addictions or these struggles or these coping mechanisms,
it's a sense of release for a wound that we feel somewhere. And that's the area in which we allow
ourselves to not have to hold it together or to release it for a little bit. And so if we think,
oh, I have to be into all of these things and all these other areas, we, we all pick our vices.
We all pick something that doesn't seem as bad as all these other things that we feel that we can't
let go of, because we think these are really bad to let go of. These are really bad to not,
you know, to make sure that we hold it all together. And so I'm going to pick what I think is a,
is a way that I can give myself comfort, relief. And it's because this is a lesser sin. That's
what we think of in our minds. Or, you know, some people go to pornography, some people go to,
um, uh, you know, drinking a lot. Some people go to, um, addictions of, uh, in, in, in friendships.
I mean, it could be all kinds of things that we pick something that we think we can hide
or, and that will do the least amount of damage. So we're balancing the greatest amount of relief
that we feel that we can get without offsetting the balance too much of like creating too much
damage that we're going to have to then, um, that we're then going to have to deal with.
So, and maybe, maybe he's picked food. I did. Um, I, I've struggled with, with food. Um, uh,
started in high school in the end, and then I lost a lot of weight and then I gained 40 pounds
in, uh, let's see how fast was that? It was very fast. This is why I needed, I need to count it
because it was, it was pretty fast. It was like, uh, September, October, November, December,
January, February. Okay. So within six months I had gained 40 pounds and then I lost it all
that summer or lost 30 pounds that summer. I don't remember how that worked. And then
I gained it over, over, I don't know, year, year and a half. I gained it all back.
And then I slowly lost it all because then I began to actually have to deal with the root
issue of why I was using food as a coping mechanism for other areas of my life that I
was working so hard to hold together. So I happen to have dealt with the exact same, uh, the exact,
having to make the choice that maybe your husband has of all the things that we can choose from.
We choose food because it seems more socially acceptable way of struggling. Um, while pornography
can be hidden is some people choose that. And some people choose other things that are much
more obvious. So in order to avoid the obvious ones, we'll take something that's a lot more
socially acceptable anyway. So just FYI, it can be an indication that he's, um, that he's, um,
struggling on to hold everything together when we're learning according to the tree of life,
we no longer have to hold it together. But if he feels that he does, everything has to be tried
for everything has to be worked for instead of everything has to be arrested in, then we're going
to try to find an area of relief for ourselves somewhere. So sometimes understanding that gives
us compassion for someone to realize, Oh, they're not trying to do something bad. They're not trying
to do something wrong and they don't like this about them, but they feel they have to hold
everything together. Anyway, those are just some ideas and some thoughts that sometimes people do
what they do. Yeah. And I mean, I think like, it's almost like, how do you, how do you support
someone who is going through a situation? Like my, my come from lately, which has not always been
this way, but lately I'm like, just kind of letting him make his choices and not commenting a whole
lot because I don't think it's helpful and just letting him be and whatever happens happens. But
I mean, I pray for him and all of that, like what would be the best way to support someone who is
constantly choosing something
that you don't really agree with?
Well, it's making them a,
it's what I always go back to
and it sounds so conceptual and theoretical
and I try as much as possible to do what Amy says,
put legs and feet to the thing.
So I'm gonna start conceptual and we'll work our way down.
But that is to talk to their identity
and it doesn't mean telling somebody,
oh no, you're this and you're this.
It doesn't mean always like declaring it out loud.
It means putting on our own oxygen mask first,
realizing this is who we are in the spirit
and then if we realize,
oh my word, this is who I am in the spirit,
meaning that the others who are believers,
they're one with the Lord and the spirit like that
and they're like this too
and always interacting with them in the spirit
as opposed to interacting with the person,
the broken person that they think that they are.
And then that what they will begin to do
is instead of talking to this person,
talking to this person,
because you're up here and you're talking to them
in their spirit as opposed to them in their soul
and they think that they're the person
that they're presenting to you in their soul.
You always talk to this person.
They naturally, it's almost like they hear their name
for the first time because you're saying their name.
So to speak, in the spirit, you're saying their name.
They're like, that is my name,
but I didn't know that was my name
and no one's ever called me by that before.
It's like they hear themselves acknowledged and recognized
and they suddenly see, yeah, that is who I am
and they make a choice of their own intention
to rise, to believe that that is who they are
and then once they believe that that's who they are,
they'll start acting like it without trying anymore.
This person down here has to try to be this person,
but if they believe that they're this person
because this is the person that you are acknowledging,
then they'll naturally over time rise to that
because they want to,
because, sorry,
I hope that hopefully that makes sense.
I've got more I could say about that,
but that's basically the thing.
So if you're always talking to this person, they feel safe
and I don't mean just in situations related to food.
I mean, in every situation that they just know
that them themselves, their identity,
the choices that they make, that they are supported
and they are loved because of who they are,
not because of the choices that they make,
not because they made a good choice
or they made a bad choice,
and that's the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
It's holding judgments and standards
of saying this one's good and this one's evil and whatever,
but just the acknowledgement of the very identity
of who someone is, not who they think they are
and the choices that they make as a result,
but that they're loved because of who it is that they are
and they're supported because of who it is that they are
and they're viewed like that all the time,
then they will naturally start to believe that's who they are
and then choices in various areas of their life,
whether it be food or whatever, will begin to shift
because it's more than just addressing it.
And I think that the, not the damage,
the mistake that we make is trying
to too directly address a particular issue,
a particular choice, a particular area of someone's life
that we think is the problem because that's not the problem.
The problem is something that's going on in their life
and that's where it's showing up.
So if we deal with that one, it can just bring hurt
because it's dealing with the symptom.
And if we deal with that symptom,
there's still an issue there
and it's going to try to find another method of escape.
So if there's like too much water or whatever
in like the body, it's going to like bow out
in a particular area and be like, no, no, no, go back in.
The water still has to go somewhere.
So it's going to find another area.
But if you actually drain it from the body itself,
and then start drawing it from the body,
then this area will naturally move in.
And any other areas where the water is trying to,
is kind of like bowing out the skin or whatever,
that's going to pull in as well
because it's dealing with the root issue.
And it makes someone more likely to change
because they made the choice for themselves.
They didn't feel bullied into it or not in,
not enough for someone else.
And so, or for the Lord or whatever.
And so they, again, do the same thing that they've done
in every other area of their life,
which is, I'm gonna try really hard
and pull myself back in in this area.
It actually deals with the root issue of the problem
and it actually takes care of it effortlessly.
So that's how we do it.
That's how I do it with all of my clients
and that's how they shifted
is I just provide that safe place for them
and they do it themselves
as opposed to addressing specific issues
like, oh, you need to fix this one, you need to fix this one.
So then, like, is there,
do you think about something
before you address somebody in the spirit
or do you envision something or,
like, I'm just thinking,
if I was gonna talk to somebody in the spirit
and see their spirit self instead of their soul,
I'm very visual.
I'd almost feel like I need to either picture something
or, like, see an aura around them or, like,
and then how does that sound different?
I mean, it wouldn't sound condemning,
but how does it sound different
when you're talking to somebody in the spirit
versus the soul?
Well, one thing before I forget
talking about the first question that you asked just now
is, like, if you're visual and all of that
goes back to the same thing
of putting on your own oxygen mask first
is instead of projecting out,
and which I'm excited to tell you this
because you're gonna be more likely
to understand this explanation
than other people that I visit with
because you're so spiritually aware.
Instead of projecting out and thinking,
okay, that person's there.
I'm sending my, I don't know, like my sonar out
and trying to get an understanding of what's going on
and whatever, and what is my response and reaction to it?
Instead, it's almost like you pull yourself in
and you start and you see, okay,
and you get a good visual, an internal spiritual visual,
not necessarily in the mind because that'll come later.
You get an internal spiritual kind of sense
of what is going on in the spirit,
who you are, who Christ is.
And therefore, if that's who you are
and that's who Christ is,
because if you're in Christ,
then Christ is our righteousness.
We are, we're holy.
We have access to know all things.
We have access to have all wisdom.
Everything that can be said of Christ can be said of us.
And if that is true,
then we know that that is the person that we're looking at.
We're looking at a person who is the exact same
as everything else that I've now realized
and shifted into is true about me
because I know, and how do I know that?
Because of what God says about himself.
What God says about himself, I can remember those things,
that is true about me,
then that is true about that person.
And then interact with that.
Now you'll see them differently
because you see, so we have to see ourselves that way.
And when we see ourselves that way,
we naturally see the other person that way.
What is really, really hard to do
is to do what people are always asking.
Yeah, but Ashley, how do I see the other person like that?
If you see yourself properly,
you see the other person properly.
Effortlessly, because you're one with Christ
and they're one with Christ
and whatever you can say about Christ,
you can say about you
and whatever you can say about Christ,
you can say about them.
So it's killing two birds with one stone.
What's really difficult
is if we don't see ourselves that way in the moment,
I'm not talking about in general.
Oh yeah, of course I know that about me.
No, we have to see that about ourselves
and we see that about ourselves in that time.
And when we do,
we will naturally see the other person like that
because we don't have a tendency
to be shifted into the spirit, one with Christ.
I know that I'm fully righteous.
I know that I'm holy.
I know all of these things about me.
I always make the, you know, in the Lord,
I always make the right choice, et cetera.
But so-and-so doesn't.
So-and-so, you know, they're not one with Christ
and they're a lower spirit.
We don't see them.
Once we see ourselves like that,
we see everyone like that.
But if we don't see ourselves like that,
we're trying to figure out how do I see this person?
And it's really hard to see them in any other way
when we haven't shifted into it ourselves.
It's very hard to see someone in any other way
than how they're presenting themselves
because what we've done is we've reached out
and used them as a way to trigger us how I should see them.
And we don't need to use them as a standard
and as a trigger of how we should see them.
to see them. And with they don't not they do not need to be the
ones to tell us how to view them. God needs to be the one to
tell us how to view them. That's why I say pull yourself in. And
once you do that, it will it's automatic. And you don't have to
try.
It kind of reminds me of, like, you know, love, love your
neighbor as yourself. And how it's really hard to love your
neighbor. If you don't love yourself, if you don't see
yourself that way, it's hard to see someone else that way.
Correct. Yeah, that's interesting. So and it's very
counter because we're always taught by the world knows
everybody else that matters and not you and God said, No, if
you acknowledge who it is that you are, and who it is that I've
said that you are, by acknowledging first who it is
that I, I say that I am, if we acknowledge that God is who he
says that he is, we will effortlessly see ourselves like
that. So it all starts with how we view God, what God says about
himself, then the second step is effortlessly because of that,
effortlessly, we then accepted about ourselves. And then
effortlessly, we accept that about someone else. It all goes
back once we take care of who it is that we believe that God is
because he said he says that he is we effortlessly without
trying to see ourselves that way. And then effortlessly
without trying to see everybody else that way. It all we have to
go back to the source. And once we go back to the source, we
don't have to try for all the subsequent steps. It's just this
it's just this deluge that flows, everything fits into
alignment.
That's so interesting. And that actually makes sense as to why I
felt that codependence, because with codependence, you're
looking to someone else for validation, affirmation to
complete you, right? So if I'm looking to God for that, then
I'm not codependent on another person, which has historically
been a struggle of mine, right? So I think, if I'm not careful,
with someone like Jason, I could become codependent on him
because he's my husband, and because we're so close and all
of that. But if I'm like, really tuned into God and who he says I
am, and not the dependence on another human being, that's a
beautiful place to be because that that really helps heal that
codependence, right?
Correct. Exactly. And that's how you provide a safe place for
someone else, because you're getting everything from the
Lord, because of who he is, not even because of who he's
declared you to be, like, if we're going further and further
back into like, where to all of the root of this is, who does
God declare he is? And then if we get that, we're not, we're
not threatened by someone else's decisions. And we can provide a
safe place for them effortlessly, because we see who
it is that they really are. And then once they realize,
especially if they're codependent on our responses to
them, it's like working with a child, in the fact that if they
can't choose to rely on God for themselves, and this is what I
do with my clients, if they're learning how to choose that to
rely on God for themselves, that they are that their identity is
declared and defined and described by who he is, if
they're still working towards that, what do I what do I do? I
start with, okay, if they are looking to, and I don't mean
like this, like, like in a very heavy sense, but I'm just
talking very generally, because you understand that because
you've got clients, he would do the same thing. If they're
looking to me to kind of affirm to them some things like, okay,
well, how's Ashley interacting with me? Is she answering my
text messages? Is she? Does she make me feel safe? Does she does
she accept me? Does she not judge me? We're not looking to
the Lord, we're looking to a person because that's what we're
used to. So if that's what people are looking at, that's
what I want to provide for them, instead of always telling them,
Hey, look, can you stop looking at me and you look at the Lord
and judging them doesn't know you're doing it all wrong. It's
what it's where they are. So that's okay. So let them know
that that if this is where they're looking, because God
does that God puts himself where we're looking. God's like,
okay, I'm over here. I want you to see me over here. No, Lord, I
don't see you. Why are you not present yourself to me? I am. I
am. I'm over here. Okay, fine. If you don't see me, I'll put
myself here. Okay, now do you see me? Yes. Now I see. Okay, now
we're gonna walk this way. You know, like, this is where I
really am. Okay, as opposed to, you know, because we're too
young, we don't know how to make the leap from here to here. So
that eventually, as we spiritually mature, God can talk
over here, and we're looking for him over here. But because we
know, we know more about the Lord, we know his voice, we can
hear him in a place we've never looked for him before. We can
hear him calling from a particular direction, and we can
on our own, find him. And we don't have
to have him put himself where we're looking,
like it is if we were a child,
and walk ourselves over here, walk us over here.
He does that when we're young,
you know, meaning like spiritually immature,
like, you know, even at our age,
you know, if we're spiritually immature in certain areas,
he will put himself where we're looking for him.
And so he's a very loving father.
He wants us to see him.
He wants us to find him.
So it's the same thing.
If we're looking like our father,
if God wants us to look like him to other people
and present the invisible God to other people,
what does we, it means that we're gonna act
and interact with other people
the way that he interacts with us,
which is if we're insisting on looking this direction,
and he puts himself there,
we can put ourselves there with other people.
That's where they're looking,
as opposed to judging them that,
well, you should be more spiritually mature than that.
You should see me over here.
You should see this truth.
No, no, they're looking here.
So put ourselves there.
So that's the whole thing with like,
making someone feel safe.
If they're looking for me, looking at me, for instance,
I'm just using this as an example.
If they're looking at me, whether it be a friend
or whether it be a client or whatever,
some kind of an affirmation to know,
Ashley, am I safe?
Ashley, does God love me?
Ashley does whatever, then I need to show the father.
This is where they're looking to see the father.
So I show them the father there.
And then once they become more and more safe with it
to be and realize the faithfulness of the father,
because I'm walking them this way,
eventually they can hear the Lord for themselves
and find him on their own.
But I don't condemn them in the beginning
that they're not there yet.
So that's looking like my father.
That's what my father does for me.
So I can provide that for other people
as opposed to thinking,
well, I should be somewhere different.
They should be more mature than that.
If God says that he's fine with us being like that
and he needs us where we are,
then we can meet other people where they are.
Yeah.
Does that make sense?
That totally makes sense.
And when you did that little thing,
that was hilarious because it was so true.
It's true, isn't it?
I'm here and you're like, where are you going?
Why don't you love me?
I am loving you so much over here.
I love that.
That's such a great mental picture
and I'm such a visual person.
I'll remember that.
That's awesome.
But yeah, no, that makes sense.
I appreciate that.
And I'm gonna reflect on that a lot
because I feel like,
so that's another thing with you when we talk,
I feel like every time we have a conversation,
I have like a little shift in my perspective of something,
which I really like
because I'm all about perspective shifts.
And I think that was something I really missed
about being in a personal development group
was like, you're constantly shifting,
you're constantly understanding.
And so I was like, oh, this is so cool.
Like just again, it's like another little shift
where I go, oh, okay, well, it's like this
and it's coming through and it's just everything.
It's just powerful stuff and I love it.
And yeah, I enjoy the way you articulate it.
And I think, as far as charging,
like I think that totally makes sense.
I think, I know it's not all about money,
but in my experience of you and like-
It's not, that's why I didn't wanna do it.
I know, but at the same time,
my thoughts are people appreciate,
I believe people appreciate more what they invest in.
It's like where your treasure is,
where your heart will be also.
Exactly.
I also feel like you're worth it.
You're worth being compensated for your time,
being in a place where you're serving somebody,
but they're also like, it's an exchange.
And I feel, yeah, I feel like you're worth it.
And I know you're worth so much more
than like a dollar figure,
but it's just the fact that your time,
you're giving so much of your time and energy, right?
So-
I appreciate that.
That's very sweet.
Yeah, I just allow the Lord to provide for me
as he wants to.
And so the way that I have been able to charge,
not charge.
Well, the way that I'm charging for,
I'm starting to charge for the private consultations.
And it's the same thing for the monetary commitment gesture
that I recommend for people,
because I only require that they get,
that they do a one cent.
Because I want them to go through a process
where they have to intentionally just,
they have to intentionally go in, go into PayPal,
go find me, go transfer.
But there's something about doing,
making a connection with your own bank account
and intentionally choosing to transfer something,
transferring even one cent that they made a gesture,
that they did something for themselves,
that I am taking an action.
And then, but it's up to the Lord as to how much they do, and everyone pays a different,
it does a different amount. And so what's helped me with that with the private consultations is
to realize, okay, I still want to be I still love providing this for people. Because like you said,
so much shifting. In fact, the majority of the shifting happens as a result of private consultations.
And I want to be able to provide that with people because that to people, because that's what's on
my heart is to help people actually live this, not just feel good about it. So anyway, the
but the private consultations charging for them is a way that people can
do what they did with the monetary commitment gesture of I'm making an intentional decision
to, to I'm owning something for myself, Ashley can't fix it. Me talking to Ashley can't fix it
me hearing something. And that makes me feel better can't shift it. I have got to choose.
This is a I've got to decide this is a choice I am making for my life that I, I want to step
out in. And I'm just trying to get a bit of clarity or a bit of feel, you know, under just
remind myself a reminder that I am being supported, I am being supported in the Lord,
there's someone else out there, he's heard what it is that I'm going through, or whatever. But
I felt that it was another way that they could actually own their shift. And that's why I wanted
to start charging for it. And because I had to change my own perspective on it on the charging,
because it just bothered me to charge. But again, there's nothing wrong with it. Because I know that
because I teach people that that I didn't feel in my spirit, that it was the right time. And I
wanted to see how it went without it. And then over time, you know, as I now have to 19 members,
I think in the 30 day rest intensive. And there are 21 or 22 new members in the five day rest
intensive. That doesn't include all of y'all, you know, several of y'all who are in the 30 day and
then are in the five that are in the five that doesn't even count. It's 21 that is over. That
that is Oh, sorry, are you there? Sorry, I got I got a phone call. And that and I was so excited
because that's what I asked the Lord for. It's like, Lord, I would really like just as many
in the five day that I already have after after what eight 10 months in the 30 day, that would be
because I want more people to see this, I want there to be movement. And so anyway, that's the
way that I've been seeing that the private consultations is to help increase the efficiency
of it, the effectiveness of it, because people, it allowed people to make more of an intentional
choice. But I'm sorry, could I put you on hold for just one second? Sorry, just one minute.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
Hey, oh, hi. Sorry about all the coffee went through me.
Oh, okay. I thought you maybe needed to get the call but that's okay.
Oh, that's why I was explaining to me, I was like, actually, if there's no need to explain, but it's like, I don't want her to think that you're hanging on just a second. Well, I could take another call. No, no, no. I did text them and said, I'm sorry, I'm on a client call.
I did do that. But I want you to think that I was leaving you to excuse me just a second while I get with someone else.
Well, if it was important, I would have totally understood because you know, sometimes those calls come through and you're like, Oh my gosh, I just need to get this. I've been waiting for this call for a while. Yeah, yeah.
It's my mom.
Okay. Yeah, I think I totally understand how you feel that way. Like, is it is it going to be the same type of thing then where people just decide how much they want to give every time they want to have an appointment with you after the four weeks? Or are you going to have a set amount for that?
That I haven't decided.
I have not decided how how I want to do that. And
I know how I want to do it.
I want to do it just the way that I've done with them with the other commitment gesture and all of that. And the the one concern that I have is there are
there are several, there are some people that I believe may not. I don't think that that would actually help them own it.
And that's where so much of so much of my time ends up going is in the private consultations. And while I do not mind it, it's just that I've noticed that I noticed for a while I was helping the same people
and there were other people who needed, who needed help, but the others were filling up my schedule.
And so that was the that was that was the problem. And it's like, how do I, how do I manage that? And
because again, the point is, is that the people that were using all my time, they
weren't shifting very as quickly because they were struggling to own it for themselves. That's my point. It is, if it was effective, hey, that's great.
There was an element in which they were they were leaning on me and that that's the issue is trying to see, okay, the majority of them, absolutely not. The majority of them owning it for themselves, not, you know, not needing any help.
But, but the ones that that I've had, I've had a lot of time spent with them.
Here's the thing. They all know the information.
They, they're just not doing it. They're not making the choice. And it's like they keep thinking because they hear and we have this tendency, you know,
if they hear something enough, eventually, it's going to effortlessly change them. And they're just going to suddenly, they're just going to suddenly
believe a particular way. And it doesn't have to make that they can avoid a painful transition. You're like, no, you still have to make the choice, you know, it's just not going to happen.
That they can avoid a painful transition, like, no, you still have to make the choice. It's all the reasons why you've said no up to this point, still the reason that you now have to say yes.
But so that is that that I'm I'm I'm I'm going back and forth on and some of them that aren't making that that shift. They are
here. And here's, here's the reason why I brought that up. And here's the reason why I'm going into so much detail with you about this is because I know that
it is you are in some similar situations with your business. And I just thought that maybe my thought process and my experience might give you like something to chew on and then figure out what you want to do, you know, just kind of like expand. I mean, is this helpful or not?
It's, it's always helpful to hear your perspective on things because I do
I glean new things just by hearing your perspective. And I mean, there's that. And I also just like getting to know you. So it's
That's sweet. I appreciate that.
I love that. Thank you.
But yeah, I can. It's almost like, how do you set people up for success to like
Exactly.
That's my point.
shifting and yeah, instead of just ruminating or going over the same thing or just gathering the information, but like really seeing that that shift. And it's like, how, how do you do that? It's a
It's tricky. I mean, you've, you've got these, you've got the lessons laid out that gives all the information. So it's like, I don't know what, what have you, your thoughts been around that? Because I feel like that's a really tricky question.
Yeah, so that's why I want to provide people with with private sessions and why up until up until recently.
because what I've also changed is my, not my policy,
but is the Marco Polo's as well.
I still love hearing for everybody.
That is not a problem.
Everyone can sell Marco Polo.
But questions though,
I want to now go through the group
as in posting on the group.
And I answer in the group.
Yeah.
As opposed to being so private.
And then if they really want something private,
then they can book a private consultation.
So it's not that I want to be,
I want to not be in contact with people.
That isn't it.
I want to just kind of like help people
increase the effectiveness of the rest intensive.
And I'm setting people up, like you said,
for success as much as possible.
And I know that it's been in those conversations,
this Marco Polo's, those private consultations
where people have shifted,
have been prompted and triggered,
regardless of whether it happened in that moment.
It like it planted a seed that over time
helped them to really make very major changes
in their lives.
And I realized that that came from those times.
And so that's why I want to offer it to people
because it helps people put, as Amy says,
put legs and feet to the teachings.
And sometimes we don't need a whole,
especially people have owned the information.
They just need a little bit of help,
like, okay, yeah, but how does that actually look like?
How does that actually look in real life?
And you actually, yes, you gave lots of examples
of how it works and looks in real life.
But in my situation, I can't quite see it.
And sometimes people just need,
especially if they've owned it,
they just need a little bit of help.
That's why I want to provide, making the connection.
That's why I want to provide the connection with me
so that people have the opportunity
to apply this in their life.
And as long as it's like this little thing
that they just need to kind of make the connection
in their own personal life,
and then they take it and run with it,
I am all fine with that.
The problem came when people just weren't making the choice.
They weren't doing the hard thing,
and they kept reaching out.
And I was hearing the same conversations,
the same questions, the same frustration,
and they didn't understand,
no, because they felt better when they would talk to me,
but they weren't making the choice.
We all feel better when we go to a conference.
We all feel better when you're teaching.
Oh, my word, that's amazing.
My eyes are now open,
but we now have to do something with it,
and they weren't doing it,
which is understandable.
The same reasons why we've said no up to this point
are the same reasons that we have to face,
and only now we have to say yes,
but we still have to do it.
The reasons for saying no won't go away.
Anyway, I'm trying to figure out
how to set everyone else, everyone up for success.
I'm still allowing them to answer questions
or ask questions, but in the group,
and people will learn from other people.
They'll also not ask me,
I won't have as many people asking me the same questions,
and I also won't have as many people asking me,
the same person asking me the same,
bringing the same situation, the same scenario
over and over and over again in the private consultations,
because when they have an answer,
they always have that to go back to.
Whenever they're struggling with it again, go back to that.
I'd asked that question before,
and this is the answer I gave.
So it was a little more direct as opposed to,
okay, where in the teaching do I hunt for that?
I figure it out on my own.
So this is my next step.
This is the next thing that I'm now doing,
and I'm sure that it'll change after this,
but this is what it's marked into, and this is why.
So I'm gonna experiment, or not experiment,
I just put this out, let it be what it is,
see what happens, that's what I did up to this point,
now I'm gonna shift, and now see how this works.
So my whole point in doing this is for it to be effective
and helpful for other people,
and I'm trying to hear from so many people,
or not hear from, but watch what ends up
being the most effective thing.
Yeah, well, that makes sense.
So like the people who went into the five-day,
did they already give like an offering to God for that,
or are you thinking after the five days
that they would maybe wanna join the other group?
Like, what are your thoughts on that one?
No, I had people make the same,
I don't know if maybe you saw my post or not.
I did, and I don't know if I,
quite got I don't know if I quite got what you did though because I knew with us I thought that you
did get them to make an offering but like so is it just like you're going to kind of do the five day
different times or do you think you just do the five day once and whoever came into it will stay
in it or do you think you'll offer it again or so um the five day group I think I'm going to close
down um I told everyone that they that it the group will be open and the recordings will be
available through the end of this week so through uh tomorrow night um if I'm going to change that
give people a little more time I'm going to have to think about that because again my whole point
is what's going to be effective for other people um I don't I don't really know what I'm going to
do there but I but my um all I did is I just I did the same thing with this five day that I did
with April intensive when I shifted from one-on-one to group I'm like okay here's an idea let me do
it and let me see what happens I didn't put a whole lot of thought and plan into it at least
when I offered it when I put it out and posted it publicly in my room here we go we'll see um
and and I knew that I would learn like with the April intensive I'd learn while I was going
through it okay what am I liking what what do I want to change how are things looking um
and so I had everyone do the same monetary commitment I had people do three things
only realize that they um owned their own relationship the lord and that they'd be serious
not and I very mentioned very specifically uh not that they were looking from to to not that that
the this five-day rest intensive was not for people who wanted to learn something new it was
for people who were serious about actually stepping out on something that God was inviting them to
follow into even if it was hard then the third thing I I um asked people um it for uh asked
people to do was make a monetary commitment gesture and I explained you know how it worked
and and the internal process that one goes through in order to do it but I did also mention
in a little snippet um at the bottom you know at the end of all that if you would like to hear about
risk that you would not like but you do not currently want to make a commitment gesture
meaning like between them and the lord then um then I told them then just reach out to me and
just let me know and so there are there are people in the group that have that did not make a monetary
gesture they they reached out and then they said well it's hard to explain but they didn't uh they
they wanted they wanted to learn but they weren't ready to make a make a commitment gesture and um
there has been a big difference there's been a big difference between those that have uh made
a gesture and those that didn't and the point is not the gesture the point is the intention behind
whether or not it got it is it and and and it didn't matter the amount it didn't matter the
amount uh sometimes it does it's hard it's hard to describe but that the the amount was just what
the the importance of it and the power of of behind the intention was what that amount meant
to that person yeah and there are some people who paid a significant amount um and I but I've been
able to tell that there that even though the amount looked more the value to them did not
equal with that amount with the value of that amount would have meant if someone else in the
group had posted that and so some that someone else in the group they didn't they didn't make
as large of a of a of a gesture but you could tell by their interaction that value meant more to them
so the amount doesn't matter the what it you know to the intensive and it doesn't matter to me
the importance is what someone else puts on uh the value that someone else puts on that amount
so that's how this rest intensive has gone as far as like what it is that I required and um uh
and I didn't even require a commitment gesture I didn't even require one of one cent um but the
majority of people made a commitment gesture all across the board um some people made um some people
made a thousand some people made 40 30 I mean not 30 maybe 50 50 there was somebody who was very
sweet they said Ashley I want to give this to give this um as a not a donation but as a as a
gesture of honor for the message and and um and to so into you to spread continue to spread this
message because they said I believe in this and I think everyone needs to hear it but they said
I don't see this as a commitment gesture that I'm making to the Lord and they've been very active
and they have been they have been um applying this in their own lives because I've been in
contact with them in private messages they've been in contact with them in private messages
applying this in their own lives, they have taken it seriously. But they said, this is, I just want
you to know, actually, this is not, I do not see this as a commitment, Esther. This money, I use,
I'm actually using as sowing into, sowing into and honoring this message of rest from the Father,
that more people would be able to hear about it. Because, you know, when we honor a prophet,
we receive a prophet's reward. So whatever, in other words, it's not a person, I don't mean that,
I mean that whatever we honor and sow into from the Father is, we're going to receive the
benefit of having honored that. Even if someone else goes through work and time and effort that
we don't, by honoring that, we get the same benefit that they do. But we weren't the prophet.
We weren't the teacher. We weren't the, I don't know, the whatever.
And even if they were honoring the message of rest and not me, so I'm not trying to make it
about a person. My point is the principle behind it. Whatever we honor from the Lord,
we get the benefit of just by having honored it. Yeah, absolutely. I love that. It sounds like
you've got some really cool stuff, like just on the horizon and still a few question marks that,
you know, God hasn't revealed everything to you yet, but he's lit the next step and he's,
he's continuing to just show you like where he wants you to go, which is amazing. And
I love, I'm just super curious to see what you end up coming up with. Like,
do you think you'll make an announcement at some point soon to let people know
all at once that you're planning on doing this? Planning on doing which? Like with the,
after the four weeks that you're going to be charging, like, do you think you'll be
kind of doing an announcement about that officially soon? Yes. So I've been telling
people, you know, individually, but I haven't, I haven't like posted it, made a post about it,
but yes, I, I'm hoping to do that. Maybe, I don't know, maybe I'll get to do that today.
I'm also trying to think about how I want to do that. Do I want to do, maybe I'll do a video.
I was going to say, but to be able to explain, you know, the purpose and all that, as opposed to,
as opposed to just something written. I don't know, but we'll see. But yeah, yeah. I plan to
do it soon. Cool. Well, I look forward to seeing what you end up deciding with God and what he
reveals. And where are you now in the world? I'm in Arlington. So we're at Texas. Sorry. Sorry.
Dallas. I know. I was staying in Arlington. Yeah. I was staying in Arlington when we went to the
Verizon theater to that conference last summer. I didn't remember that. Okay. Yes. So yeah,
the Verizon theater, very good memory. Yeah. Right. Right. At the road here off of 20.
And yes. So that's where my parents live. And so this is where I, where I always come back to
that to their, when they're at that bedroom and where I have my, all of my stuff stored in the
room and in the closet. And so, yeah, I'm here for the holidays and then I don't know where I'm
going after that. I have some friends who invited me out to Minneapolis for new years and a bunch
of them are getting together. And so they invited me to go up there. So I'm considering that.
And I don't anyway, so I just kind of like taking things just, you know, just being very flexible.
Sometimes I make a decision like the day before I do it, which is, which is really fun. But
anyway, so I don't know where I'm going next, but yeah, this is where I am right now. And I also
have, there are some people in the group who have asked me in their five-day rest intensive,
who I know personally, and they're here in town and they've asked me to speak to their group,
which used to be my old home group when I was in town and do an intro on the rest intensive.
In case and on rest and what the fathers taught me about, about rest in case that they, and there's
enough interest in the group that they want me to do a rest intensive just for the group.
So anyway, and another thing I'm hoping to eventually do, because I love speaking in person
and love getting to interact with people in person. I would love to get to do some rest intensives
in person. Like I've had multiple people ask me to invite me to come speak to groups.
Nothing has, you know, in person and nothing has, and things haven't solidified yet, but I'm hoping
that maybe that'll be something that I start doing this year as well, doing some in-person stuff.
That'd be awesome. And I think the more COVID disappears, the more opportunities there will
be. Like, have you, have you ever been to Canada? I can't remember if you've been to Canada.
I have, I've been to, is it Victoria Island?
right on the West Coast.
I've been there.
I have some friends that live there.
Oh my word, right on the water.
It was stunning.
It was absolutely amazing.
And I've always wanted to go to Prince Edward Island.
I've got friends from Canada, but no, I've never visited.
And so I'm gonna have to come and see you sometime
once the border opens.
Seriously, I know, it's crazy.
Like it's been a while now.
I would love to like go to the U.S. for any reason,
but my parents live in the U.S., like two of them.
My dad and his wife live in the Buffalo area.
And I wanted to go see April
because I don't know if you know much of her story,
but she had a preemie baby.
Yeah, so I'm wanting to go
ever since she brought her baby home, right?
But it's such a tricky situation.
And then the quarantining and all of that
that you get to do.
Yeah, but I would love to have you visit
when the time is right, when the borders open,
it'd be great for you to come and yeah, that'd be awesome.
I'd enjoy that.
Now, remind me about April.
I'm not meaning to like ask about someone else,
but I can't get ahold of her
and I haven't heard anything from her.
And if that, I'm just assuming
that she's just going to do what she wants.
And so all of that's fine,
but I've been trying to reach out to her
and she hasn't contacted me.
And so I'm just asking, is everything okay?
Is she okay?
How have you tried to reach out?
By what means?
The only connection that I have with her is Facebook.
That's literally the only connection.
That's how we originally connected.
It's the only way we've ever contacted.
I don't have any other way to get ahold of her.
She's not on Facebook very much,
but she does Marco Polo quite a bit.
And she texts.
So that's why I wondered if you had her phone number.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, yeah.
Yeah, she can do whatever she wants.
I just want to make sure, you know,
I want to check in with you
and make sure she's doing good and that she's okay.
She can be just like anybody.
They need to choose this for themselves.
I just, I don't know.
I feel bad if someone joins the rest intensive
and I just haven't heard from them,
like, are they okay?
I think she's just kind of,
I think she's got a lot going on
with her five kids and the baby.
Yeah, that's fine.
I just want to make sure she knows I am available
and that surely she knows that,
but I didn't want to make her feel like
she joined the rest intensive and she's abandoned.
I'm right here.
You know, the rest intensive's here
for her to reach out whenever she wants,
but I just want to check in with her.
Yeah, she, yeah, I feel like,
I feel like it's just life,
like in so many areas of life.
I know the busyness of it,
but I don't think she's fully tapped into the resource
that the rest intensive is yet,
even though I-
Which is fine.
It's her decision.
Well, yeah, absolutely.
And I know it's something that she wants so much,
but she just, I don't think she's understood
the value of what's there yet
and like the value of spending the time
to like ingest it yet,
but when the time is right, she will.
And I, yeah, I totally agree with you,
but she's doing well.
And I think if you've reached out to her,
that's beautiful.
She knows that you're there and-
That's the important thing.
Yeah, I just needed her to know, you know,
which I knew that in theory she knew,
but there's something about having someone reach out
to just verify and affirm,
yes, I really am being thought of.
You know, I'm not abandoned.
They are there.
They remember me.
It's not just there if I want to reach out.
They've reached out.
And so there's just something.
So I just wanted to make sure that she was okay.
She can do whatever she wants.
You know, when she wants, she's on her own journey.
Everybody in the Rest Intensive is,
and they've all reached out to varying degrees.
Some a lot, some a little,
and I just want to check in with her,
make sure she's doing good.
Has she read your messages, Dino?
Let me check.
There was one.
The last time I looked, she had not,
but that was a while.
That was a little bit ago.
Let me see if she has.
Come on.
And while I am pulling this up,
what can, I don't know if you need to go,
but I was wondering,
was there anything that you wanted to update me on
for, I don't know, your business and how that's going,
or anything?
You know, I think business-wise,
I think just, I know money's not the most important thing,
and
I'm trying to really do it from a place of, you know, not
focusing on that. But I also really like the idea of being
able to at least make back the money that I'm investing in it
every month. So I've kind of been on this journey of my money
mindset around, it's interesting about being able to receive. A
friend of mine lent me or gave me a book called The Go Giver.
Have you ever heard of it? It's a really good book. It's kind of
like the name. Yeah, it's great. It's a great little book. And
it's such an easy read. And it's all about these five laws of
stratospheric success, but it all comes from a place of
giving first. And the last one, my friends like in the last I
want you to pay attention to the last one because that one's for
you. So I get to the last one. And I'm seeing okay, it's the
law of reciprocity. So I'm like, okay, so I'm reading it,
I'm reading it, I'm reading it, I'm like, I keep seeing the law
of reciprocity, law of reciprocity. And then I finally
realized that it didn't say that. It said the law of
receptivity. And I was like, like, I couldn't even read the
word properly. So I realized that I have a little bit of a
block, or I've had a little bit of a block with receiving and
believing that I'm, in a sense, maybe worthy of receiving that.
And like, I know I'm worthy. But I was like, Am I worthy of
actually like receiving money from someone? So I, yeah, like,
I've really been thinking about how do I get to be okay with
receiving because love is about giving and receiving, you know,
life is about giving and receiving. It's a full circle
thing, right? Like, we need it's like breathing, right? You can't
just breathe out forever, eventually, you have to breathe
in, the plants need to give off with the right, like we have
this, you know, we receive it. And if we don't, then we're
constantly just going to be trying to breathe out. And
we're never going to breathe in and receive what's coming back
to us. So like breathing in that oxygen. So I just feel like I
need to honor, in a sense, like, if we like look at it as a
representative, like the plants, the plants are giving to me what
I need. And I'm giving back what they need. And it's almost like
with people where, like, how do I apply that in a way that it's
an exchange, it's a flow, it's a, you know, it's more than just
them paying me for my services. It's like, more of like an
exchange in the spirit. It's a soul exchange, as far as them
getting rid of their soul tied to money in some ways. It's
about them making a gesture because people care more about
what they invest in where their heart is, or where their
treasure is there their heart is. So I've been playing around
with this idea of how do I get to be okay and confident even in
saying that they get to actually invest if they want to work with
me in my program. That's been a tricky one.
So what have you, what conclusions have you come to? Or
like, how far along? You know, are you like, we're in the
thought process?
I think everything I just shared is kind of the conclusion I've
come to, which is not a conclusion. No, no, it's not
really like,
I didn't expect it to I know you're in process. I'm like,
where are you in process?
That's kind of where I am. I know there's, there's something
more. But I just haven't been able to like, really feel the
peace of it's okay to receive money. It's okay to, you know,
like I see my pastor, I see pastors of churches, they
receive money. You know, they don't just work for free, right?
You don't work for free, you do yours a little differently. But
you know, most coaches, they don't work for free. So why do
I think that I have to just give, give, give for free. And
then when I go to ask for money, I feel guilty. It feels wrong.
And so I don't really know what to do about that. Yeah.
Yeah. And I have some I have some ideas, which you what would
those be helpful or interesting at all?
I would love to hear them. Yeah.
That I think that it might help if you know, you're talking
about, you know, an exchange, the exchange is not something a
way that you can view it is not as the exchange between you and
them. But as something you're receiving from the Lord, but
he's doing it through them. And you we don't have anything that
we can we don't have we're getting rid of judgments that
we're getting rid of standards, we don't have a judgment and a
standard that we are holding someone else to in order to
exchange something with them.
We offer them something they then that because it relationship is a two way street and it has to be initiated and decided by decided on and owned by both parties.
So, we provide something. And then, according to our relationship with the Lord and what he desires, and then they choose as to whether or not they want to, whether they want to own that aspect of giving back.
And I'm even talking about many as far as like you actually charge it like isn't another word you have an exact amount you say like, I don't know, $500 or $1,000 or $1,500 or whatever to join the to join your to join your program.
So I'm not talking about doing it the way that I that the way that I do it I'm not talking about that I'm talking about, you have an exact dollar amount.
The exact dollar amount is not an X is not a way that you can view it because you can do it a different way you can do it in a way that you were talking about where it's an exchange because that's how most people talk about it.
But another way that you can that you can view it that might open things up for you, it might open up your ability to receive is because what it is that you're receiving is from the Father, you're receiving it though through them, and they have to own that, as opposed
to this being an exchange of hey I'm giving you this, you give me this, you give someone honor and it doesn't mean that they're going to necessarily give you honor back.
Right. So, in order, so it's so we can do is this is an, this is all based on an internal shift of like not demanding internally demanding an honor being honored and acknowledged and and given to to for an equal exchange from someone else.
In other words, internally not feeling that that's what's going on but instead be like okay God, I am receiving from you, you are my provider you're my protector you're my identity and and what I believe would be effective for them in my, you know, based on what you and I've
talked about what you and I've decided of how much we're going to charge, and we'll just call it $1,500 $1,500 that that is something that you are giving to me through them, making the owning this for them, themselves, and choosing to partake of it.
So what that does is, because looking at it a bit more from the perspective of of an exchange that this isn't between you and the Lord, and that the money that you're getting is this exchange program of tip for tat is is what can foster and feed a co in a codependency
that we have on an egg where we're internally there's something in us that requires and is looking for and is needing a, an interaction from someone else to us in order for something to happen in our lives, or in order for us to feel a particular way about ourselves, or in order
for us to have enough motivation to help someone or or whatever wherever we're going. But if we shift that to everything being between us and the Father and he just chooses to do it through other people that helps us, that might help open up that idea of rest of receptivity,
that that that you're needing to feel like you shift into because you're receiving it from your father and at least you less internally dependent on what's on what someone else is doing.
So it's still in again, I'm still talking about you having an exact dollar amount and saying I'm sorry but no one can come into the program unless they do this exact dollar amount, I'm still talking about that situation, I'm not talking about mine.
It's still that exact dollar amount is between you and the Lord, they get to choose whether or not they're going to, they're going to honor it in that way. You set up some standards, you set up some structure, not standards as in judgments, but you set up a structure
of the environment of your, of your business, of your ministry, and they can fit into that. There's nothing wrong with structure, nothing. Everyone's structure of their business or their ministry just looks different, but you own that structure between you and the Father.
There's no right and wrong of like, these are the only the good structures and these are bad structures. No. So, it's, you do the exact same thing that you're wanting to do now, which is this exact dollar amount, but where it's coming from, and the end, what's going on leaves.
It will make it healthier for you and easier for you to probably open yourself up into.
is if you understand you're receiving it from the Lord and not holding other people accountable
to meet that for you. They have an opportunity as to whether or not they want to be part of it
because they've owned it for themselves. I don't want to say it severs you more from other people,
but it doesn't make you as dependent emotionally, mentally, and on other people's response.
That's huge. Other people's response to your five-day self-love challenge and whether or
not they choose to go into your program after that or when you have an ad or when you have
a post and how people respond. It's all between you and the Father. You and the Father are fine.
You and the Father are healthy. You and your Father have this huge expanse and space to move
within. Other people have an opportunity that you're providing them to step into if they choose
and they take the ownership to make the step. Yeah, so that makes sense. I like that a lot
because that takes me out of the law of reciprocity, which is what I kept seeing,
and the law of receptivity and just receiving it but from God. I was looking at it as receiving it
from a person. I think just shifting into seeing that from, okay, God's bringing these people to
me. God knows who needs to work with me and who needs what I have to give. He knows who's going
to get the transformation they've been looking for from this versus something else. He knows.
I think it's when I get on the phone with them and I seem to attract these people right now who
don't have a lot of money. They're like, I'm on disability. I think a lot of the people,
I don't know if I'm calling forward some of the people. Maybe I need to call forward different
people, but I'm just reaching women who struggle with self-love. Well, a lot of women who struggle
with self-love also struggle with disability because your mind has an effect on your body.
It's not a disability where they don't have legs. It's a disability like chronic pain,
where that is like- Emotional disability or mental.
Yeah, exactly. I feel like when I get in a conversation with them and they think $197 a
month is too much money, or even $97 a month when I had it there was too much money. Maybe for them
it is, but I guess I look at it and I'm like, well, if you're the right person or you really
want it, I've talked to God about this amount, but then I also feel like I'm leaving those people
out and I'm not serving them. I have a few options and each tier they get more access.
They can do $97 a month, but then they just get the program. I might throw in one group coaching
session a month. If they do $197, they get two group coaching sessions a month, but I think the
$97 could be, at least what I felt is like, because my time is, I don't have tons and tons
of time. It's like $97 a month, they go through the program, they can send it in once a month
and get feedback on it, for example. $197 a month, they can do two group coaching sessions.
$497 a month, they do two one-on-one sessions with me and two group coaching sessions. They
get the whole package and that's for 12 months. I feel good about that, but then I run into people
who think that's too expensive. Now, I run into people who don't think that's too expensive, but
their money mindset throws me off because I know that their money mindset can be
fixed in a sense, or it's not really about money. I want to help them break free of that,
but I don't really know how and I don't know. It's just, there's a lot of,
yeah, it's tricky for me in that. Yeah, and I'm sorry I'm looking down here. I think
I'm writing notes. I thought you were making a note. Yeah, it's like it so I can remember.
Or like- What?
You're doing your Christmas cards while you're- I'm just joking.
I thought you were writing, were you writing notes about what I was saying?
Yeah, yeah, about like, yeah, some ideas that came to mind. So I'm just listening
and just sensing how we do, just kind of like sensing things in the spirit is
one of the things that I would suggest, and
Um, I feel free, uh, you know, suggesting this to you because it's an
encouragement is to help you with the people that you're attracting is to
add a strength to your message.
Because what you might be doing is because of your care for other people
and your desire to make them feel safe.
Like what we were talking about earlier in the conversation is it can sound so
gentle that it attracts people who don't, who've been wanting gentle,
who've been wanting gentleness in their lives and haven't gotten it.
And those people can tend to be people with a poverty mindset.
They're so damaged and there's so whatever they, they, they are.
They're, they're desiring such amount of, uh, that, that they're just
needing an amount of gentleness because they haven't owned this for themselves
to the degree that is healthy for them.
So if there is an aspect of strength and by that it's some internal shift within,
within you that will, that, that you can make in, in, um, that you will
effortlessly begin to speak with a particular strength that, um, I believe
will, would attract more of those people.
For instance, um, I was shocked at the number of people that were, that, um, uh,
wanted to, that joined the rest intensive when I, when I laid out verbatim, I mean,
laid out verbatim, laid out exactly how the, uh, that I were, you know, required.
Um, technically I didn't require it, but, uh, that I required
a monetary commitment gesture.
And I told them amounts.
I told them a range of how much other people have considered
it valuable in their world.
I, you know, I mentioned a hundred mentioned 5,000 and I said
everything in between and whatever.
Um, and I think when people realize, oh, wow, this is, this is serious.
And I, and I made people and I told them, Hey, look, you know, you need to own this.
You need to be serious and here's something.
In other words, there was like something that kind of made them realize,
oh my goodness, this is, this is heavy.
I thought it might cause people to not want to be part of it because it's
almost like I was laying, um, I was laying down a, um, I wasn't just
kind of like, oh, everybody free love.
No, it was like, no, there is an aspect of this that is very serious.
There's, there's a strength behind this.
There's a solidity that I, but it requires something of you.
Do you want in or not?
And I wasn't being mean about it, but you know, it added a bit of weight to it.
And so when they realized, oh, wow, this is something I really
am supposed to take ownership of.
I couldn't, I didn't know which people were taking ownership of it and which
weren't, but I did provide them an opportunity of, to, to take ownership of
it, and I did it by my message.
I did it in the fact that I created boundaries, I created structure and by
boundaries, I don't mean like bad boundary, like boundaries of like,
well, you're in and you're out.
I mean, structure and they can choose as to whether or not they want to be part
of it as opposed to, oh, well, something you can't help.
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
You know, you're, you, you can't be part of it.
Um, so I think if there's some way that you can add strength and I'm not
talking about the way that I did it, where I just said, oh, well, commitment
just turned, I'm talking about the way you talk about it and the opportunity
people have to move into it and what it means and whatever it'll cut that
strength will automatically come across in the words that you choose and in
the phrases that, that you speak it in.
Um, and you will notice that people feel like it can get away more with
things with women than they can with men.
Why?
With men, there's a strength that there, uh, that, um, men are, you are people
just readily expect to, to encounter certain lines, certain structure, and
they will respond to the structure that someone else has set up, but women tend
to be a little more loosey goosey and let people get away with them.
So, so it allows people will take advantage of that.
So my point in, in connecting in mentioning that is with men, we typically
associate a certain type of strength.
And, and I wanted to mention that is how people respond to strength.
It's in a very healthy way.
Uh, so that might help.
Um, and then, um, and then what you're doing is you're providing those people
with an opportunity to choose something for themselves, as opposed to trying to
can convince people that they need something, um, which I know that you're
not, but I'm saying that that can come across even in the, in the messaging,
um, that you're.
So I've learned, and this took a while to learn,
I had to learn how to present my message in such a way
that I just stated things how they were.
I didn't try to convince anyone.
I state what it is that I believe.
And I just say, this is it.
This is what it looks like.
You can take it or leave it.
I'm not trying to force my opinion on you,
but this is how it is.
As opposed to trying to convince someone
to change their mind about what they think about REST.
I just present it how it is and they can choose
as to whether or not they agree with it.
That was a huge shift in my messaging.
And that I had to learn that earlier this year
as I was messing around with messaging.
And this was even before I was teaching REST in those terms.
I was still teaching REST to my one-on-one clients,
but it wasn't in those terms.
And I had to learn to not try to convince people of things
to just the more strength that I added to my message,
kindness still, gentleness, not forcing someone,
not in a place, not from a place of judgment,
like, hey, if you don't agree with this,
well then I'm judging you.
No, but where I was solid and sure,
and they could choose as to whether or not
they agreed with it and wanted to be part of it.
But I wasn't presenting it as,
oh, would you like to, I don't know, I don't know.
Anyway, does that help?
It does, because I think the way I presented my message,
which a lot of women came from a little Facebook ad I ran,
and it was all kind of about
if you're struggling to love yourself,
you haven't seen your true worth,
and you're trying to make everyone else happy
and you're tired and you just wanna heal the pain
and hurt of the past and have that joy and peace in the Lord
and all of that, but I could tweak it the next time around
and say, if you're kind of like, not exactly like this,
but if you're a successful woman
who's got a lot of great things going on in her life,
but there's still a wound deep down inside
that you know you haven't healed,
you know that you still haven't been able to see yourself
as the beautiful, worthy woman that God created you to be,
then maybe just even that one tweak in the messaging
could draw people forward who are successful,
but they've got a lot of good things going on in their life.
Maybe they volunteer at church,
maybe they have a great job, they raise their kids well,
they have the perfect family,
but deep down inside they're still very wounded
and they don't love themselves,
but they're putting on a facade.
And maybe if I called forward those people,
it would be a different vibe than what I'm getting.
I don't know, is that kind of what you're thinking
when you're talking?
Yeah, sorry, I'm writing some more down.
Right away, it's all good.
Okay, so, okay, so, you know,
take this and do whatever you want with this.
I had heard this and I didn't believe it would work
and then I started doing it and oh my word, it works.
Because I made the same shift that you did.
So I went through the same process.
I only talked to the pain, only talked to the pain,
you know, and pulled out people
who could identify with the pain.
Then I switched to what you're talking about
where it's like, okay, well, yeah,
you talk about all these wonderful things
so that they can identify with, you know, more positivity,
but you still mention things like some negative things.
Say for instance, what I used to do
is I used to write my message something like,
I help people who are stressed
and I help people not be stressed and anxious.
Let's just say that I said something like that.
Well, the problem with that is it identifies,
it calls out people that identify themselves
as stressed and anxious.
And in other words, it calls out people
who are focused on their pain,
but I didn't tell them where it is
that they expect to be going.
I just called out, hey, do you identify as a victim?
Is what I was saying.
Do you identify?
Yes, yes, I identify as a victim.
You know, that's not healthy people to attract,
but do you identify yourself
as someone who's going through a hard time?
Yes, yes, I do.
So it attracted people like that.
Then I switched it to, I help people move into,
I'm not remembering the exact phrase that I said,
but it was something along the lines of,
I help people shift that are stressed and anxious
shift into finally living from peace and rest.
And I thought that would be better,
but here was the problem.
It still called people out and attracted people
who identified themselves as stressed and anxious.
So I'm calling people out that identify with pain.
their identity is in pain and those are the people with a poverty mindset and I don't mean with money,
I mean just with emotionally poverty, you know, mental poverty, you know, mental health poverty,
whatever, relationship poverty mentality. So what I did instead is I stopped talking to pain.
I only talk about positive things. You'll notice when you read my post or when you listen to me
talk, I talk about rest. I do not talk about unrest. If ever I do mention things about like
being stressed and anxious, like say for instance in the teachings, I'm always talking about it
where like, okay, you feel that thing? Okay, now this is how to get out of it, as opposed to focusing
on, yeah, see, doesn't that feel bad? Yeah, we can all understand that, we can all recognize that, right?
No, I'm just like, okay, no, no, it is this thing that we're talking about is so powerful. When you feel
stressed and anxious, what you do is you take that and you let it go. You stop holding on to it and I
focus so much in all my teachings on all the positive. This is where we're going. This is,
this is what's going on and even when I talk about this, you notice how I spend a lot of time talking
about the fact, hey look, these are not bad things because we do not want to create, I do not want to
focus on it, I do not want to create a focus on something that is so painful we're trying to escape
it because people just feel worse and worse and worse and worse about themselves and the more,
the more that they focus on pain, if I'm telling them to focus on it, if I'm calling them out on it,
I'm like, oh look, stress and anxiety, don't you recognize that? You know, don't, can't you relate
to that? It's calling attention to it and the more attention that we focus on, more attention that we
give to something, the greater that we feed it and we are feeding the monster we're trying to escape
from. We are strengthening the thing that we've already not felt strong enough to leave and now
we're just making it stronger. So what, what all of a sudden people started coming to me when all
I heard me talk about was rest. I'll go to these conferences, there will be, there are several
people in the five-day intensive that I've met in person and they asked me, so Ashley, you know,
what do you do? I say, well I teach people about how to shift into rest. I'm like, are you serious?
Oh Ashley, we need to connect. That's all I say. I don't talk about people like, oh I help people
who are stressed and anxious finally be able to be shift into rest. I do not talk about anything
negative, nothing. That was huge and trust me, I've done the other. So it's not like I'm saying,
oh yeah, this works and I don't know about the other. No, I did the other and it attracted
it for months, not a little bit, months. It attracted really, really hard people. It attracted
people who were demonically oppressed. Like literally they had demons living with them that
they could see and hear and whatever it was attracting and they didn't want to get out of it.
They said that they did, but they didn't want to do what they had to do because the demons were
talking their ears and it was just, and so they didn't want to shift out of it. It, it attracted
people that would call me from the emergency room because they were going through a panic attack and
actually I finally want to join. And then they would ghost me like, yeah, actually I do. It's
like, okay, well, we'll talk about this. So we would get, we'd come to our next schedule to come
to a scheduled call where I wanted to see if they wanted to join and they'd ghost me. Like they
literally blocked me. They blocked me on Facebook. They blocked my, my phone number and I'm like,
you're the one who gave me all of this stuff. You're the one who reached out to me.
They're in resistance big time. Yes. Yes. So anyway, my, those are extreme situations,
but there were other ones that matched exactly what you're talking about. Oh,
gosh, this is just too expensive for me. I don't have enough money and, and more than a cent and
it's too expensive. Yeah. Well, well it wasn't then back then I was like charging, charging
particular amounts, but the only way that I could start charging the way that I started charging a
cent was when I changed my message. So it was my message that was filtering people, not the money.
Hmm. Yeah. So you were calling people who wanted to overcome, who wanted to rest,
who wanted something more, better, different. Yeah. You didn't want to escape their pain.
They're focused on what they're trying to find as opposed to I'm trying to get out of where I am.
Yeah. I think I'm, Oh, I think I'm a mix of both. Cause I've been sort of taught. You want to
talk about their pain and relate to their pain. So they know that you understand them and then
you agitate it a little bit by like kind of going deeper into it. Yeah. And then you show them
what's possible, which I think, I think I've done a mix of it. Like I'm really positive about what
they get to do and straightforward about that, but also maybe you're feeling this way right now,
and maybe this is what you're experiencing and guess what's possible, you know, and that's kind
of where I go with them, but you think it might work better.
to just focus on where they get to be, where they get to go, like completely focus on that,
and not really touch on the pain much at all? That, yes, correct. Now, I've done the other
because I was taught the other. And I, but again, it is focusing on things that it's creating,
it's creating, it's getting them to, what you're doing is you're changing the motivation.
They both work, but by changing the motivation from them, you don't want to attract people who
are trying to escape pain. And that's what that is where your foot, I know that, I don't know,
is this backwards for you out of curiosity? No, no, I can see it. Well, yeah, it's good.
Okay. So it's backwards for me when I look in the camera. What that process is that you're
talking about, I used to do that. I did that last year, 2019. And what that did,
that's what I was taught. And I was taught it hard. I mean, that thing was driven home with
me. Actually, this is what you need to do. And the problem is it does motivate, but I don't
like that motivation. It attracts a certain type of person that I don't want. And because what I'm
doing is I'm getting them to own how bad their situation is so that their motivation is to get
out of it. And I don't, and I no longer wanted to do that. And I, um, I wanted to, um, and what
helped me was a business coach that I had. He went through the same program that I did.
Only what he does is he does the opposite. He focuses on this and he calls this person out in,
in the, um, in the message. That's what he did with me. And that's why I joined him. And he
began to use a Jew. Actually, he said he was Jewish rabbi. That was my business coach. Yeah.
And, uh, and so he's the one who taught me about this, this change of perspective of this light.
No, Ashley, the Lord is good. The Lord is very good. I'm having to learn this from a Jewish
rabbi. It was this, but anyway, you know, he didn't believe that Jesus is the Messiah. Um,
and may that, and may that change, Lord. Uh, but, uh, he, he changed my perspective to think,
no, no, no, no. If I, if I, if I know my God, what is my God do? My God focuses on the positive.
He focuses on, on who it is that I am and who it is that we are. And he calls us into it. He
doesn't just be like, okay, look, you're so bad. You know, you need to come to me. Uh, and so he
doesn't create pain. He's like, Hey, wouldn't, this is who you are. I'm calling you out to this
place. Just like what I was talking about earlier, where if you see your clients and you talk to
your clients as this person in those clarity calls, as opposed to this person who can be more,
wouldn't you like to be more? I know you can be more. I can help you be more. You can do this.
That is, that is creating a, um, a, uh, a false oops, uh, creating a, um, a fake support system
that they can't, that they can't rely on. You can't sustain them because if that's how they
get up there, well, then that's how they're going to be, uh, have to be sustained. So if you just
talk to this person, they get to choose as to whether or not they can resonate with that person
and resonate with wanting to be that, but they have to choose it for themselves. Um, so I just
changed the motivation instead of, instead of motivating people to join the rest intensive
or to be attracted to the idea of rest, because they were just simply trying to escape the fact
that they didn't feel at rest. Instead of doing that, I just attracted people. Hey, regardless
of what situation you're in, wouldn't you like to operate out of rest? And then it attracted
more healthy people because some people were really far out of rest. I mean, like bad, bad,
bad, bad out of rest, but because they're, they, because their, their, their motivation for joining
the rest intensive was not to escape, but it was to go somewhere. They have been amazing people
to work with. Uh, and then there are others who weren't as bad, but they still, but they still,
you know, were stressed, anxious, you know, whatever the issue was. And then they wanted,
but they, they wanted rest there. So my point is that I'm attracting people who are wanting
to attract people whose motivation wants to be, to wants to be the one whose motivation is this,
not to escape this. And what that ends up doing is it attracts by attracting those people.
I no longer focus on where people are coming from. When my clarity calls, I am not filtering
and, and, and sensing from people how bad their pain is, is to know whether or not I can help
them. I'm trying to figure out how serious they are about this. And so everyone that comes to me
is at different levels down here. Some are in the body. Some feel like they're worse than they're
even lower than the body. I mean, they're just like, so, so damaged. Uh, and then there are
others who are just like barely right there and almost in, almost inside, you know, and they're,
they're very high. They're even, they're in the soul or they're, it almost.
It's like they're above this all. And, uh, but so I don't have to worry about where people are.
All I have to worry about is what they want. I don't want to attract people who want to escape
this. I want to attract people who whose eyes are on this. So I get people that in the group that
are in various in varying degrees of, uh, trauma. Some are really, really, really far down the pipe,
but they're not in a poverty mentality because this is their focus. Their focus is not how bad
they are. Their focus is on what they want. So then would you even, would you even talk about
like, cause I'm talking about self-worth and self-love and I am talking about healing,
you know, from the past, instead of talking about healing past pain and hurt, would you just,
would you even talk about like, you know, being in a place of, of being healed from,
you know, is that calling them forward into the vision of, you know, do you want to be healed
from imagine like, you know, being, being healed fully from those old wounds. Like I still feel
like I'm calling them forward, but then I'm also talking about the past, but I'm not focusing on
it too much. So is that, is that going along with what you're saying? Or is that still focusing on
the past? Uh, it's still focusing on the past now, no, that it works, but you're going, the people
that you'll attract by that are people who focus on it. Um, you know, even if they don't focus on
it as much as other people, they still focus on it. Um, so what you're doing is you're wanting
to attract people whose mindset and, and, and, um, insights are on something, not people you're
not trying to filter. Okay. I'm only wanting to attract people who are struggling with trauma.
Really what you're wanting is you're wanting people to move into this. You're wanting to
help people move into this. So you don't care where they're coming from. You don't care what
their issue is. You don't care whether or not they've been through trauma. You're just wanting
to attract, to attract this, the people that want that a lot, they're all going to have trauma.
They're just going to have it in varying degrees. Some are going to have been raped. Some are going
to have been through a cult. Some of them are just going to be like, well, I don't know. I just don't
feel good about myself. I was raised in a wonderful home and I just don't feel good about myself.
Nothing really awful as mad as happened, but I do want this. Those will be wonderful,
fun people to work with because you get to help them shift into something it is that they want.
And it doesn't matter the, the event that happened. So what you're doing is you're talking
to people about you, um, you're, you're telling them who it, you are talking to who it is that
they are and being the first person in their lives to identify them, to, to see them as somebody,
as opposed to what it is they want to do instead of saying, Oh, wouldn't you like to shift out of
this? Um, you can, um, it's more like, this is who you are and this is how I see you.
They're going to want to join your program just to be around someone who sees them like that.
And then they, as a result, Oh my goodness, maybe they can start believing. Maybe that is
who really who I am. And then they'll start. And then they'll start changing as opposed to,
there's something I need to do. I need to heal. I need to change. I need to, I need to escape.
I need to heal my wounds. I need to need to have my wounds healed. However they wanted to word it.
It's more like, I, this is who I want to believe I am. And then when you believe that that's who
you are, everything else starts to, starts to heal. Um, that people are very, very attracted
to that. At least, you know, people with a health, with a healthier mindset is, um, so what
you're doing is doing, did I talk about this last night? I remember it's what we do with all of
creation, whether we're talking to our own souls and body, or we're talking to another aspect of
creation to send other people's souls, or we're talking to plants, trees, the moon, whatever
we are. We as the sons and Kings of God up here, we are called to declare and identify to creation
who it is. So that's what you're doing with your, with, um, when you're pre screening clients, uh,
it is, you are, or, you know, even when after they are your clients are our responsibility as a King,
he was sitting on a throne governing an aspect of creation, whether it be our solar body, another
person's soul or rocks or plants or spiritual laws or whatever, whatever it is that we're
governing from that position. What does the King do? A King declares what everything is,
you know, it, it identifies it, it names it. That's what Adam did. God created the animals,
but Adam named him. And by naming him, he declared something about their character and their
personality because it's in a name. And we know that because of how God, um, the significance that
God says that name.
have. He changed Abram's name to Abraham. He changed Sarah's name to Sarah. He changed
Jacob's name to Israel. He changes people's names. Why? Because names mean something.
In the Old Testament, it always said, oh, well, you know, that so-and-so named their child such
and such because if he bore them in struggle, you know, it's a terrible thing to declare a child.
In other words, it means something. So what we're doing is we're identifying something. We're
identifying to a pre-screening, what do I call that, you know, potential client, to a potential
client, you know, I'm seeing you as an individual. This is who you are. This is how I see you. And
you don't have to say those words. You can just, you can talk to the person that you know you're
seeing them as, and that's how you interact with them. You're talking to them as if they're a
healthy person, not as if they're a sick person. Wow, you're this, wow, you're this, and oh my
goodness, you can do this, and wow, I can see this, and oh my word, you have made an amazing
choice in your life from the story that you told me to do this, that, and the other, as opposed to,
oh yeah, those bad things that happened to you, you didn't deserve that. No, wow, you made this
choice. You made this choice. You know, you've got, you have, you have been through so much,
and you saw it with knowing that that isn't who you are and knowing that that was more for you.
And, oh my word, you're, you're continuing to press into that, and God honors that, and God
loves that. You're talking to the person who made all the good choices, not the person that had bad
things happen to them. That's what I'm talking about in talking to this person. Is that helpful?
I'm not trying to say that what it is you're doing is wrong or bad, because it's not. I'm saying if
you're attracting those people, that's what I had to learn. Why, why I was attracting those people
is acknowledging their brokenness and their pain. I was getting people who focused on their
brokenness and their pain. Yeah. So if you're wanting to change that, here's how I, I, I've
done it. And it doesn't mean that I don't, that there aren't people that kind of come through
anyway, but that's between them and the Lord. The Lord just sent me to love on them, you know?
Yeah, no, I like it. It totally makes sense. I guess I just, I wouldn't know how to articulate
that. That's the first thing. It's knowing how to actually articulate who I'm speaking to as like
who they are, who they want to be. And I also have been told many, many times in my life,
and I don't know what you think of this, that I look to put together and that if I don't show
vulnerability and that I understand where they are because I've been through it, that they're
not totally going to trust me. So yeah, I understand why people are saying that, but that
is not true. Um, uh, meaning like it doesn't have to be that way. You need to be who it is that you
are. You just need to be who it is that you are. If there's an element in which you're trying to
present yourself in a particular way, which subconsciously is if you're together and you get
on a call thing, okay, I need to have the answers that subconsciously is going to come across.
And then, but all that people know is what it is. You look like there don't realize,
and you look put together. You always look very put together. That's the only way they can
articulate the fact that something's not quite right. Something doesn't feel sincere. Something
doesn't feel authentic. Something feels put on because they can only see the outside. So they're
attributing it to it. And that is absolutely 100% not true. You present yourself and express yourself
and how you in, um, in the clothes that you wear and how you conduct yourself and in, in,
in the way that you do your hair and the way that you do your makeup as an expression of your
authentic self. So what you do is if you shift the, the inside of whatever you feel has to be
a particular way, has to have all of the answers, wants to make sure to be there for the other
person. We could put all kinds of godly terms on it because they are, it's coming from a very
genuine place. Um, if you change that and, and, and, and, um, uh, and not hold and learn to have
less judgment, learn to have less judgment for ourselves, that authenticity will come across.
Even, um, uh, we'll come across even more. And what people will see is they will not feel
threatened by how it is that you look because they think that, oh, well, she's not, she's,
she looks to put together because of how she's conducting herself and how herself and how she's
articulating things and how she's dressed today and whatever, what they will see instead is they'll
see. They'll, they'll sense in the spirit because that's their issue. Their issue is not the visual
their issue. That's the only way they know how to attach the fact that they don't like something.
The fact that something doesn't make them feel sincere. It's like, well, it's probably cause
she looks like that. It is not. So in other words, they can get past it as long as the internal
projection. Um,
is, is different. Um, so just, if you just, if you just relax and you don't think, oh, well,
I've got to get something out of this. This is, this is very important because this is a business
call. I'm helping someone else. I need to make sure that I'm there for them. If there's all
of these things that you're requiring of yourself to do and be for the other person or for the call,
it comes across. And the only way that they're able to assist that the only way they're able
to connect with it is to like, well, you look to put together bogus, absolute bogus. It's,
it's a spiritual thing that they're, that they're sensing. So, um, does that make sense?
There's nothing wrong with you be yourself. I guess. Yeah. Like, I guess I've just been
told that so many times, like if you, if you want to talk to these women who are in these places in
life and want to get out of them, which might be part of the correlation, right. As I've been
talking to women who want to get out of the pain. So therefore I need to talk about the pain that
I've been through in order for them to understand that I understand the pain and that they can get
out of it because I've gotten out of it. But if I come at it from a place of I'm holding you to
this level that God has already created you at, then I don't need to talk about my pain as much
because whatever you're you've been through, I'm holding you to this level that you're at.
You just don't quite believe it yet. Yes. So you can talk about your, um, we can talk about our
pain, but we do it very, very, very little, very little. So I have posts once every so often that
I'll talk about, Oh, I've been through this. This is what I used to believe and whatever,
but it's the posts and those catch people's attention. But the people that really want to
join the rest intensive or the, or the, the most powerful posts that make people want to join are
all of the positive things. They hear y'all's positive testimonies that, that, um, are posted
on my, on my, um, uh, on my personal page. They hear me talk about all of the wonderful things
that rest is the wonderful things that they can move into the wonderful testimonies from other
people. Those are the, those are the posts that people are seeing that right after that, right.
When they see that all of a sudden I get this, I get all of these people who contact me about
wanting, wanting to join it. So it's not that we don't talk about our pain. Um, just like y'all,
y'all had told me you like to hear my experience, but you, but why do you like to hear about it?
Because I don't talk about it. I don't, that's not the focus of the rest intensive. So you just
kind of want to hear it once or twice and it's kind of like, Oh, okay. All right. Got it. I've
got a connection. So in other, but it's not the majority of it, but it kind of gives you something.
So, um, I don't talk in my clarity calls. Um, I do not talk about my, my, um, my pain in my experience
usually at all. Every now and then someone will say something like, say for instance,
that they're really, um, have had a lot of trauma in business. I might sometimes that's one that I
do bring up. I'll be like, yeah, you know, I, um, I understand that this was my experience
and I'm serious. I make it like, um, sometimes two minutes long, if that, because that seems
like a long time, just two minutes out of an hour call two minutes. And that's it just so that they,
they hear it. But what they're, what they're interested in is not someone who's been through
what they've been through. They're interested at least the people that I want to attract,
the people that I want to attract. I do not want to attract because they can relate to me because
we all understand what pain is. I want them to, to be attracted to me because they,
they see what my life is like, like I want a life like that. Then I can just, you know, mention like
in one minute or two, Hey, you know, this was my experience, but I, I don't gloss over it as if it's
not important, but I make it, I hit the highlights. I make really big, big, bold statements that kind
of like take multiple years of pain and like squish it into, you know, like a couple of phrases
or whatever it just so that they're like, okay, she really has gone to some, some deep places.
And she went from a deep place like that to the 98% of everything else that she's telling me about.
I paint this picture. I make the power come from the light and the truth, as opposed to,
as opposed to the pain or, or the fact that I could relate to them.
It's, I don't want to motivate people to join because they can relate to me.
I want people to want what I have. There's enough out enough of people out there to make people feel
like people can relate to them. They can watch lifetime television.
they have someone like to them.
That's not hard to find.
But to find someone who's living a life
and has a perspective about themselves
that you wish that you could have, that's rare.
So that's why I wanna provide to them.
No, I like that.
And I think I'd get to figure out how to articulate that
from self-love and self-worth
without focusing on why they don't have
a lot of self-love and self-worth.
And I think that's where it's a bit tricky for me.
It's like, I wanna call them forward into like,
I would never know where to start
with trying to articulate that in like a Facebook ad,
for example, to try to attract the right people
when I do the self-love challenge again,
or maybe I call it something different.
But it's like, I know who I'm attracting
and I know where they get to go.
And I know what they get to believe
to be where they wanna be.
But I don't really know how to articulate that
in a language that they would understand
because they understand their pain,
but they don't always understand
the vision of where they wanna go.
If that makes sense.
Okay, so it made a very interesting point
is that
the people that you're describing,
that they can't see where they wanna go
and they can only see their pain
are historically the people that you've interacted with,
which are the people that you don't want to attract.
So there are people out there
who see where it is they wanna go.
And how do I know that?
You're for instance, one of them.
You knew what you wanted
and maybe you didn't know it until you heard it.
But when you heard it, it resonated.
You're like, there's something there and I want it.
I don't even fully know what it is, but I want it.
When people hear it, if their ears,
meaning like their spiritual ears,
the soulless ears, whatever, are open to hearing it,
they will hear it and they will be able to recognize it.
They may not be able to articulate it to someone else,
but you can articulate it for them
and it can resonate with them.
You can give words to feelings
that they didn't know they had,
that something deep down in there
that was longing and yearning and reaching for something
and you said it into words
and that's what they resonated with.
But I think that historically,
the people that you've been interacting with
are people who can't see anything but their pain.
But those are people that haven't owned their healing
and owned the opportunity to heal.
And therefore, if they haven't owned
their opportunity to heal,
they're gonna rely on you to heal them.
And I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to plug in my phone.
It says it's about to die.
But anyway, so you're wanting to attract people
who've already, because they have to own it.
This has to be a choice that they make for them,
not a choice that we convince them to make for themselves.
And the way that you can empower them
to make a choice for themselves
is by not making the choice for them.
So your whole thing in a clarity call with a client,
and when I say you, I'm talking about us,
our whole point in a clarity call is to empower someone
by clearing away, helping them clear away
as much of the fog as possible
so that they can decide what it is they want.
It's not to tell them that they should want something.
It's not to convince them that they should want something.
It is to clear away the fog they have
where they can't quite figure it out
and decide for themselves what it is they really want.
They say that they wanna be healed and whatever,
but you and I both know, having worked with people,
that is not what everybody wants.
They don't all want to be healed.
They wanna not deal with what they're dealing with,
but they don't want to actually live in a state of healing
because their identity is in their pain.
I have multiple people in my life
whose identity is in their pain.
My identity used to be in my pain.
I can fully, you know,
I used to be able to fully relate to that.
So it's just to clear the fog
so that they can empower them to make their own decision.
And they get to choose as to whether or not
they want to recognize and step into that power,
but that is what it is that you're offering to them.
You are giving them something in that call
that no one else has ever given them.
And it's to let them know,
it is to empower them to make a decision
by believing that they can make the right decision.
Not the decision you want them to make,
but that empower them to know that you believe
that they can make good decisions for themselves
and that you support.
for them making a decision regardless of what the decision is.
So how, how do you articulate that in a way, let's say I was going to run a Facebook ad
again.
I'm going to go get the charger.
Okay.
Let's say I run another Facebook ad and I want to call forward the people in that vision
or, you know, trying to explain to them, stay, stay, sorry, my dog, go ahead.
Sorry, I'm not telling you to stay.
Yeah, like how do you work in like a Facebook ad to people when you're getting them into
your challenge and you're throwing it out there and giving them this creation idea of
where they could be.
But they're so disconnected, well, they're not completely disconnected from it, but in
a sense they're disconnected because they can't fully see it, but, and you want to speak
their language.
You don't want to just use words like I could be like your identity in Christ coming into
agreement with who he says you are and all that stuff, but people are going to, it's
going to go way over a lot of people's heads.
So I'm just, how do you articulate it so that it makes sense so that it's, you know, it's
attracting those people because I feel like I don't know how to articulate it.
Part of it is, whoops, are you there, yeah, there we go.
So what I recommend that you do is look at the post that I have done and see if you can
hear some of this in there, but what it is you're doing is you were talking, you were,
okay, I'm going to draw this really quick, but before I do, will you excuse me just a
second to run to the rest of it.
Sorry, just a second.
No, never apologize.
I just keep wanting to explain, even though it's very embarrassing for me, because I don't
want you to think, hey, look, I've got other things I need to do, so just a second.
If we were on an audio call and I needed to go to the bathroom, honestly, I would just
go and not even tell you that I was going.
No, I would do the same thing, and I have done that with people before, but we're on
a visual call, so I have to leave you, so just a second.
Don't worry.
It's awesome.
Okay, so can you remind me one more time?
I was about to draw something.
Can you remind me one more time what I was about to draw?
What was your question?
I was saying, like, how do you, in a sense, like, call forward the people in, say, a Facebook
ad or something?
Yeah, a Facebook ad.
Okay.
All right.
Thank you.
Okay.
Okay, so this is what I've never had anyone explain this to me, but this is how I have
done it.
And it kind of works.
Okay, can you see this?
I had to turn that off in order to plug my phone in.
So there's their words, the way that they use to describe things, then there's the truth
that you know, and how to articulate something.
And what you write is you write your posts in the transition.
So in by their words, I'm not talking about their pain, I'm talking about, you're trying
to express the truth in using the words that they understand.
But you still add a bit more of your words, the way that you know that the truth really
is expressed in order to give them a bit of a, in order to know that you have been somewhere
that they haven't been, that there's more beyond what even they know when they understand.
So this is their words about the truth.
This is how they would describe truth, the way that they think of where it is that they're
going and what it is they want.
There's what you know of how to describe what it is that they, the truth of what it is they
truly want and how the Lord would describe it.
You know, things like, hey, this is actually all about your identity.
This is actually all about, you know, believing God loves you.
This is actually all about, I don't know, rest, whatever.
And then, and then what you do is you write a post that, that writes everything in the
way that they believe that using the words that they understand, but, but, but from a
perspective of, and using some new phrases from here, and this is the mixture.
For instance, what I did is when I started talking about, okay, I use, for instance,
I use the word rest.
Rest is something that talks about in the Bible.
And so in other words, it's one of these words, but, and these people down here, we talk about
it as peace.
So periodically I'll sprinkle the word peace in there, but I often use this, this, this
rest, but the way that I talk about rest is a bit from a way that they would talk about,
that they would talk about peace, like how they feel that when they're, when they're
at peace.
So, so I use sometimes this term using, and phrase it in using, in use phrases that they
would use, but I use, that I, that I would say it using this term.
Or I'll do the opposite.
I'll use a word that they use, but I use these phrases.
So there's this mixture in here that, that they can relate to, but it lets me, but there's
also things in there they've never heard.
And it gives them the opportunity for their spirit, which knows the truth to, if they're
open, if they've opened their, themselves to being able to hear it, that lets them know
that, that, that pulls them towards something that resonates with them, but it's something
that still challenges them.
It's not something that they've ever thought of before.
And it, and it pulls them forward.
It's a, it's a, it's territory that they've never moved into as opposed to simply describing
it in their words.
Cause they're like, Oh yeah, I'm already there.
I understand.
Yeah.
I got it.
Give them a little bit that they don't know, a little bit that they didn't, that they hadn't
thought of before and just do a mixture so that they, when they read your post, they
can hear something that they understand, but you're also in the way that you write the
post or explaining it in a, in a way that they've never thought of phrasing it before.
And it, and it pulls them forward a bit.
It lets them know you've been somewhere that they've never been before.
They've only gotten this far.
They've never been this far.
And you're letting them know I've been this far, but I can relate to where you are.
And it's this transition phase.
So some of their words might be like, does God, does God really love me?
Does, you know, I guess they would probably be asking questions, but again, I think where
they're at, it would be that negative stuff.
It would be, I don't know where they would be at in order for me to call them forward
if they haven't gone through, or if they're not sort of stuck in the pain of it.
I want them to be motivated to get out of the pain, but they, but they're in pain.
So how do you speak to their pain without speaking to their pain?
Because all of this right here.
Here, all of it is truth, including their words.
This is their words of how they would word truth,
your words of how you would word truth,
and then the transition.
None of this is talking about pain, not even their words.
So I'm talking about forgetting the pain altogether,
not even talking about the pain,
and only talking about the truth.
That's what this diagram is, is how would they,
what are the words that, what are the ways in which,
what are their words for how they would describe the truth?
How do they hear truth?
What is it that they know in their world,
based off of things like, oh, well, God loves me,
and God this, and things that they know from the Bible,
or things that they know, that you know that they know
already in their soul and their spirit,
even if they don't acknowledge it and whatever.
Not everyone is going to be at the place
that they acknowledge it.
Not everyone is gonna be at the place
where they've chosen it.
They're not your people.
So if I-
So this isn't meeting everyone where they are.
So if you say something like, you know, God loves you,
and there's something missing for you
because you haven't been able to feel it,
or something like that, like, is that transitioning?
Like, I feel like I, it's funny that I'm stuck on this,
because I really am struggling to figure out
how to articulate it properly.
Nope.
I'm getting to help somebody with the same thing
that I struggled with for months.
So, no.
It's just listening to you, I'm like, oh, wow.
Wow, I did go through that transition, didn't I?
Like, no, it's listening to you.
I'm like, yep, yep, yep, yep, I got it.
I understand, I had the same problem.
My business coach was like, Ashley, it's just so obvious.
I'm like, no, it's not.
Okay.
So, what, okay, so you were talking about, you know,
God's love.
Like, okay, well, you know, you said, you know,
we know God's love, but maybe you don't feel it.
That is acknowledging their pain.
You know God's love, but what you're,
but what we're saying is that you don't feel it.
And instead of talking about the fact
that they don't feel it,
you talk about the fact you want to feel it,
or this is how you feel it, or you can feel it.
It's all, it's all from the positive,
as opposed to, yeah, but you don't feel it, do you?
I know, I understand.
You know, you, you know, it's, it's,
it's presenting everything it is that they want.
And like the fact that they want to feel
and experience God's love and whatever,
and talking about the fact that, of how to feel it,
how to experience it.
Not about the fact that they're not in feeling
and experiencing it.
Okay.
Yeah, so.
It's just a tweak.
It's everything you're doing,
but tweaking how you phrase it.
Yeah, so always going into the positive of what they want.
Okay.
Yeah, presenting this,
presenting what they want from the positive perspective,
not in what it is that they're trying to escape
or acknowledging where it is that they are.
So if I say something like,
you know healing is possible and you want it,
or you know healing is possible and you want to be there.
Like, I don't know, something like that.
Is that still going negative?
No, no, no, it's,
okay, so maybe slightly.
So here's another way that I can,
you're heading the right direction, so this is great.
I'm just giving you like this extra, extra.
You write the thing and let them find themselves in it,
as opposed to declaring things over them in the post.
You are this, you're feeling this, you want this.
It's gonna attract those people.
Let them, you write a post
and let them find themselves in it.
You're not finding them for them.
You're not convincing them about something.
You're not even letting them know, hey, look,
you and I, you know, we can relate.
You be writing about truth
and let them find themselves in the post.
So what if I said something like,
like I declared all these things that they are over them
and then the end I said, do you want to believe it?
Do you want to join the five-day self-love challenge?
I don't know, I don't know how to like entice them
to want to do it.
No, no, that's good.
No, I was just, I was just thinking,
cause I obviously I take your question very seriously.
Because I used to do that.
I used to write like that too.
And, sorry, let me go to,
we'll find it really quick.
Where is it?
Because I can say, you know,
while you're looking for that, I can say, you know,
God loves you for exactly who you are.
you have worth and value as a daughter of God, you know?
And I could speak all these things over them
and then say, like, do you believe it?
Or do you want to believe it?
So that's what I was kind of thinking
when you were talking, but what were you thinking?
Sorry, I didn't want to interrupt.
I know you're probably trying to do things at once.
No, no, no, that's good.
Okay, so what I started doing is
I used to ask this thing questions
and I've noticed that,
that they, again, they're effective,
but they're effective in attracting a certain type of person.
So I have not, the past several posts,
and I didn't even realize this
until we started talking about this,
I just naturally started doing it
and I'm looking at it going, oh, wow,
because what I did is I internally shifted my perspective
on how I view things,
and so I no longer write like that anymore,
or at least I haven't passed it or post.
And again, it's kind of like,
oh, I don't even know how to describe why I avoid,
why I avoid saying it like that anymore.
I'm like, well, do you want to believe it?
Because it's giving, again, oh, that's why.
Because again, it's acknowledging the fact that they don't,
and I don't want to acknowledge that they don't,
at least as much as possible.
Now, I'm not trying to deny reality
when I'm talking to them at all,
but if I'm choosing about what it is that I want to talk
about and what it is I want to focus on,
I don't want to talk about that.
If the conversation is within my control,
which the part of what it is,
because it comes out of my mouth, that is in my control,
that is the part of the conversation that's in my control,
I want to talk about the truth,
and that's how I want to direct mindset and the thoughts.
So what it is, for instance,
if you look at the post that I made on December the 7th,
the powerful secrets of rest,
and then it's that picture of Jesus lying back,
kind of like this, looking up at the stars,
you notice that at the end,
the way that I did the invitation is,
instead of letting everyone know that,
instead of saying, oh, well, wouldn't you like this,
or whatnot, I even didn't say,
if you would like to learn more,
I just, I made an invitation
that put the ownership and responsibility on them.
So if you look at the end of the post,
I mentioned, you know,
if you're not familiar with the content
or the details of how to join,
you can find the details on Sunday morning.
So I'm going to talk a little bit more about that.
I'm going to talk a little bit more about how to do that.
And then I'm going to talk a little bit more about
how to make them hunt for it.
I didn't give them them, I made them hunt for them.
I remember specifically putting that sentence in,
in order to make them hunt for it.
They got to want it.
How badly do they want it?
Because what I'm doing is I'm empowering them.
I'm not like, oh, well, you've got to work for me.
No, absolutely not.
They don't have to work to join the rest intensive.
They have to work for themselves.
And the rest requires that they give up all of those things
that they were using to protect themselves.
They can't even research.
So I'm empowering them to start,
to start having some success in their lives.
You want something, go for it.
So here it is.
Do you want to go for it?
Yes, I do.
They step out.
There's that, that's a bit of success right there.
Bit of success, a bit moving forward.
So then the next sentence I said was,
feel free to read those and then reach out
if you think the rest intensive would be a good fit
for what you're looking for
in your current journey with the Lord.
Everything is all about them owning it.
This is you, what do you want?
If you, you know, feel free to read them,
reach out if you think it would be good fit
for what you're looking for.
Not, hey, call me and we will see
if this is a good fit for both of us.
They need to know that no, you are owning this
and you have to work for it.
Meaning like you have to like not work for it.
You have to be the one to take the steps
because I'm not gonna take the steps to come towards you.
But I'm here and I'm inviting you to come if you'd like,
but you're the one who has to step out on the water.
I'm saying come, you know,
but you have to put your foot out of the boat
and come on the water, but I am here.
And I'm saying, I am inviting you to come.
I'm not rejecting you and I'm not telling you no.
So I, in the end, I ended on something very positive
as if I almost like expected them to make the choice
because I believe in them.
I'm looking forward to seeing y'all in there.
It's going to be really good tonight or, you know, whatever.
I didn't want to say to, you don't.
I've noticed that I don't like coming across too strong in that way, because it feels very
weird to me.
It feels almost like it feels slightly, there's a thin line between believing in somebody
and subconsciously controlling them.
Like I believe you should want this.
I don't want to come across like that.
I don't want to ever condemn them for not making that choice for them.
Yeah.
Um, anyway, and then there's one on December 6th, 6th, you can look into that as well at
the bottom of that.
I mentioned, if you decide you want to join, feel free to message me and ask for the link.
Um, you know, after you've made the commitment, you let me know, and then I'll do this.
So everything is then as, and then I, I happen to mention it out as, um, Oh, here's a question
I asked.
Have you figured out yet that shifting into rest is shifting out of bondage and into freedom?
So all I said was, I mentioned it a positive thing.
Everyone reads that and they, they, they know I'm not questioning their intelligence.
They know I'm saying, have you figured this out yet?
In other words, I'm assuming that they have, that's the way that that comes across is,
I mean, have you figured this out?
It's just so obvious.
Isn't that cool.
And now we're just all acknowledging the fact that now we all realize that it's so freeing
and it's for all of us.
Isn't this great.
And, and I also always combine myself in here.
Um, I always, I always talk about us.
God provides it to us, um, every now and then I say you, but when I do, I word it in such
a way that, that it's, I, I, um, I word it, um, that's how I know whether or not I want
to use you or us is, um, I always love hearing the others or something.
I, I, what did I say this, his character looks like her father.
I don't remember where it was.
There was some place that I was going back and forth on, should I say you, or should
I say us?
Um, but, uh, at the beginning of December 6th, I said something like rest is our inheritance
because I'm not trying to convince somebody as something like rest is your inheritance
and you need to do this and whatever, whenever I talk about you, I use it very sparingly
in the majority of it.
I want them to feel the inclusiveness that I'm within them instead of, I know more than
you and, um, and you, and I'm trying to convince you that you should want something that you
don't currently want and you should realize that you should want this.
So consciously there's this judgment that people can feel if, if we're not careful.
So I've always, that's the way that I bring relation.
Uh, you know, you're talking about like people wanting to know that they can relate to us.
I include myself with them.
They don't even know me.
Some of these people, a lot of them know me, but they don't, a lot of these people don't
even know me, but they can see that me not even knowing them, they don't have to prove
anything about themselves to me without me.
What, uh, they don't have to prove anything about themselves to me before I will reach
out to them and naturally include myself with them because I'm not afraid or threatened
by the fact that I may not agree with them.
I am being that vulnerable that I am including all of us together.
Anyway, those are, those are just ways that those are just some of my, my thought processes
of why words, certain things, the way that I do in order to, and I've had to learn this
in order to bring, um, in order to bring ideas in their mind that, Oh, Ashley feels like
she relates to me.
She feels that we're all together.
She feels like, you know, I'm not separated.
You know, she's not separating herself from me.
And she's also not trying to convince me of something it's, it's, it's, you know, I can,
I can own it.
And she's there for me if I want, but you know, she doesn't, it's not free love that
I can just come and take, you know, it's, there's like a seriousness to it.
And anyway, that's, those are some of the ideas that I've, um, so that I've learned
to incorporate, but I've had to learn it because I've had to take this entire process that
you're taking right now.
Um, it was very frustrating when, um, I couldn't, I couldn't get it.
I'm like, I don't understand how to do it.
So it was a journey I had to take.
No, it's good.
And I think, I think if I go through some of your posts, I'll probably get even more
insight because it looks like, yeah, you've really structured them well there, especially
the more recent ones.
You will see a difference, um, if you go back to say, um, I don't know how far back
you'd, you'd have to go.
Um, I think prior to April or March, there was a big post that I made in which I'm wearing
my hair up and I'm wearing like, uh, like a gray heathered shirt and I have a scarf
tied in my bun and then hanging down.
That one, that's the one that I, at the end of March,
that I invited people to join the rest intensive in April.
That was my new group program starting in April.
Prior to that, that you might notice my posts
and how they sounded different.
They weren't horrible, but they were definitely,
meaning like they definitely showed improvement,
but I was still trying to make the transition
into how do I word things from a positive way
without highlighting pain?
And anyway, so I don't know.
So if you're looking to try to find something
to compare it to,
because I didn't always write the way
that I've been writing the past few weeks
and maybe even since April.
So you'll notice this huge gap between like June
and December or November, whenever that was.
No, that's awesome.
That's a helpful perspective
because I think that's a good shift for me to have
and just try creating an ad from that place.
And because I'm going to do the challenge again
and self-love, like,
do you think that's an appropriate title?
Because I mean, really we're looking at loving ourselves,
you know, seeing ourselves through God's eyes,
which is about self-love, but it's more than that.
So I don't know if that's even the best title for it.
I feel like women can relate to it
because a lot of them struggle with self-love,
but I don't know.
Okay, so I'll mention this
and this can be a challenging stretch
to make and to understand,
because it was for me.
Because I, for a while,
would talk about things like self-confidence
when my message was like this over a year ago.
I don't know, like April, 2019, June, 2019,
stuff like that.
I was talking a lot about self-confidence, self-love.
You might even be able to find it in some of my posts
if you go that far back.
Again, early part of 2000 and early to mid 2019,
you might be able to hear a lot of this.
And I really struggled with understanding
how do I talk to people?
How do I talk to what it is that they want
and without, you know, properly?
Is talking about self-love and self-confidence,
is that a good way to do that?
And I've realized over time,
it's actually still not quite there yet.
It can still draw people with a poverty mentality.
Maybe not as much as a poverty mentality sometimes,
but still a poverty mentality.
Poverty mentality emotionally or whatever.
And so what I recommend is just talking more about
instead of, oh, you know, self-love, self-confidence,
instead just talking about things like as if they are,
they are, they are, I know what I'm trying to say.
You can see this is a challenge to figure out
how do you say what we're trying to say
without saying self-love.
Yeah.
Again, you're talking to the person,
to who that person is.
You're not telling them.
And whenever you're talking to someone
who is in a healthy state,
who has a very healthy perspective about themselves,
we don't talk about self-love.
We don't talk about self-confidence.
We just talk about, because it's so automatic.
It's so, we just take it for granted that we just,
we feel loved.
We know we are loved.
We know that we are deserving of love.
We know that we are confident.
I don't have to worry about the fact that I'm not,
that I have to provide myself with love
because I don't feel loved.
Like, cause that's sometimes a subconscious impression
that we can get with like self-confidence and self-love
as opposed to just confidence.
There's an idea of action that's required
with the idea, with the subconscious thought
of self-confidence is if we're lacking
and we have to give it to ourselves
as opposed to just taking for granted,
of course there's confidence in my life.
Self-confidence gives us this subconscious impression
of action and flow that we have to be part of,
which implies that we don't have it
and that we're having to create a movement
that isn't already there
as opposed to taking for granted the fact
that we live in an existence of confidence.
We live in an existence of being loved.
Because, and, and the fact that we are deserving of love.
And I don't know, I hope this is making sense because I'm, it is, it's hard to make that transition into into what it is that I'm talking about.
To the point where I, I don't even talk about self-love and self-confidence anymore.
I don't even, I don't even like it. It doesn't even, it doesn't even feel good to me.
And I've never, I haven't had to articulate it before, but it's because I transitioned past that into, into just talking to people, loving them, having confidence in them.
Okay, that's a, that's a big key right there.
When we, when we're talking to the spiritual person, we talk to, we don't tell them that they need to have something that they don't have, or trying to convince them that they should have something that they don't have.
We love them.
We're confident in them.
As opposed to telling them, they should feel different than the way they do. If they don't feel loved, we love them.
We don't tell them they should find it or that they should realize they already have it.
If they feel that they don't, then we give it to them. We know they already have it.
But, so remember that, that verse where, or that, that, where Jesus was saying, he said, you know, if someone is hungry or someone is, it doesn't have enough clothes, you know, to keep them warm, he said, don't send them on their way.
Don't send them off saying, well, you know, I encourage you in this, or even though you're not talking, we're not talking about sending them off, we're talking about, oh, come into the program, you know, and give it to them.
That is us not interjecting into the situation and giving them something they feel that they lack. And what God's saying to do is he said, no, give it to them.
Don't send them off saying, well, you know, I encourage you in this, or even though you're not talking, we're not talking about sending them off, we're talking about, oh, come into the program, you know, and get this.
We're still telling them, hey, look, you're on your own, and I'm just here to convince you, you already, you already have it.
That is something we want them to understand, but the way that we do it is if they don't feel loved, we love them. We don't tell them that they're loved. We don't tell them they should feel loved.
We don't point them to all the areas of their life that should explain to them and convince them that they're loved. We love them. It requires something of us. We have to give it.
That someone that we love or someone that we care about doesn't feel it. We love them. We don't convince them they should be.
We also have confidence in them. And so, again, it all comes back to putting on our own oxygen mask first. If someone doesn't feel something, we give it to them.
We love them. We have confidence in them. Not think that they should have confidence in themselves.
We give it to them. You know, that kind of thing. And understanding that and making that internal conscious shift in our mind will change how you write the posts.
So it all goes back to changing what it is that we actually believe. And we will naturally write, speak, and express what it is that we naturally believe.
But if we haven't changed how it is that we believe, then, yeah, we're having to work on how to wordsmith something in order to come across to someone in a particular way.
So, yeah, and I totally hear you there. And I guess I'm thinking, if that's the case, and I'm not calling them to something that they don't have, then what do you call a five-day challenge where it's like calling them to something that they already have or something that...
I'm sorry, just a second.
I'm so sorry. I have people in my house that my mom came home and so my mom and my grandma are in the kitchen and they are just laughing and having a great time and I cannot hear you. So can you repeat what you said?
Sure, of course. So if I don't want to title the challenge something like self-love by looking at something that they don't have that I'm going to help them get, but titling it something from where they already are, I still don't know where the need is there.
How do they know that they need it? What do I call it so that they go, oh, that's something that I need? Because self-love, they can go, I need it. Confidence, they can go, I need it. How do you even title something like that?
Well, it would be, they will hear their own need. They know for themselves their own need. You don't have to identify their need for them.
People find it themselves again you write things and explain things in such a way that they find themselves in it, as opposed to you identifying who they are in the story.
Instead of writing a post telling you this is, this is who you are in the story you you just write truth and let them find themselves in the story, let them find where it is that they don't have what it is that you are talking about they will identify their own gap.
So would you call it something like the five day loved by God challenge like is that that's like truth and it's what they are.
It can be something like experiencing love or.
or experiencing God's love.
or something like that.
yeah.
Because that's what you have up here.
yeah and it's not identifying that they don't have it all you're talking about oh we're going to be experiencing God's love this week.
yeah and.
Does that make sense.
What it is that's actually what it is, it is experiencing God's love really.
yeah yeah.
So it's that kind of thing you always it so you're you're saying everything you're saying it all right, you just tweak it you're saying, in other words, you're saying all the right things it's just.
How you phrase it that switches it to a positive mindset.
and attracts those people.
it's funny want to experience God's love, as opposed to you, identifying the gap yeah see see some of you are aren't experiencing it very much and others you really aren't experiencing you're not identifying a gap you're not identifying where it is you are you're just like who wants this.
This is wonderful once it you're going to have to work, I don't know how far how far away, you are from this thing.
That you're you know how far away, you are from this thing so therefore once you identify that you want this thing you're the one who has to own.
That that that journey, whether it be a short one or a long one in order to get here but that's your deal i'm just offering this up here, not how i'm not offering.
To.
i'm not.
I can't I can't think of it the way that I was thinking of how to describe that but you're not offering.
To help.
Sorry, the reason i'm focused on this is it's important if I can figure out how to articulate it the you're not focusing on and telling them that you are.
You are.
you're identifying.
and acknowledging the distance that they're going to have to travel to get there you're just telling them, this is where you could go do you want to go here, because you would offer for the same price, and if you were in say the.
If you had a resort you had a resort you're going to offer for the same price to someone who tried to travel a an hour than someone who had to travel halfway around the world.
it that's their deal how far they have to come do they want it and let them own the value in their world of what getting to that destination means to them.
that's not for you that's not a responsibility that's on you.
Of like a how far to identify oh i'm only interested in people that are in South Africa that want to come you're just like know who wants to come here that's all I care about who wants to enjoy being here.
and
Is that the help.
Whereas I would be like oh you're traveling from that far, maybe I should give you a discount because you're already paying a lot to travel, whereas the way you're talking about it as much better because that's what I would do.
And yeah which we don't want to yeah because.
yeah anyway, and also also another way thinking of discounts there's nothing wrong with discounts, but we need to be careful in how we do I recommend that we that we be careful in how we view discounts, because what we don't want to do is buy is sometimes by discounting things we can subconsciously value.
Put value.
In the minds of the person of sorry put value on the pain that they are going through as if it's worth more than someone else's.
yeah that we give them a discount and there's nothing wrong with discounts it's the it's the attitude, the perspective, the.
intention behind what the discount is supposed to be saying and what it's supposed to be accomplishing
um so yeah no that's good and i think yeah i really like that like experiencing god's love
challenge because that's what it is and then here's the thing that i'm thinking about now
my program is called the set free academy and they're already set free so the name of it
represents who they are it's like um it's like a noun and a bit of a verb at the same time
um could be an adjective too it's a whole bunch of different things
set free i want it to represent that they are already set free and they are learning
you know how to live into that freedom but i'm trying to explain that in the way of
what we're talking about here
um so i'm sorry what's your question how you is it is your question about the name of the academy
set free or is it about what you're describing to people about the point of the academy well i guess
my main question would be is that title okay is that is that telling them that they would be set
free or is it assuming that they are already set free because of what christ did for them and they
just are learning how to believe it and live in that space like how how can i articulate that so
it's still calling them to who they are already um what i would just personal recommendation um
i would recommend not talking about the uh in in the in the title that it might be especially
helpful if it's if the journey isn't talked about because the program is not about the journey the
program is about the being it so i i don't know that this is just a really good title i'm just
coming up with i'm just throwing it out there just because to give you to get your mind start
thinking about oh that kind of a shift um i'm not saying that it's a very glamorous title or anything
but uh instead of set free because set gives this idea of even though you know we already are set
free the way that that can come across is set free and i'm just letting you know you know from
a third party perspective that set free can give the impression in someone's mind of action in other
words that there's journey in it but in other words it's not already there um and uh the and
and so they're just like okay i'm get i want to be free so yes i'd like to be set free again
it can be a subconscious trigger in their mind that um of of acknowledging their lack
acknowledging i'm not there yet while uh there's nothing wrong with your title i'm just giving you
an idea of like that is something that can like the way that some people might might see that
um and another so one of the the change that you can make is called it could be again it's not
glamorous uh is being free the being free academy or the or the free academy uh not free academy
that sounds like it doesn't cost anything but uh you know being free or um um again it's not a
glamorous title it's a really i don't know that that's a really good one i just want to let you
know of a word change in order to change because the being free is not talking about the fact that
they're acknowledging that they're not somewhere that they're trying to go it's kind of like rest
intensive i just say rest intensive i don't talk anywhere in there about a journey i just like rest
don't we all want to be in rest i don't talk about the fact that they're not somewhere and hey the
program is going to get you there i do not address the journey i address it as something that every
time they say it's like this is already where i am and where i can choose to be because god's
declared to be so anyway those are just some thoughts this is from somebody who's it i know
i'm belaboring the point about words that i have a degree in english and and it's because the lord
has put a really um i i i greatly appreciate um the the nuances of words because they do trigger
us subconsciously and people don't realize it so i know that they actually matter so anyway i just
think it's important but everybody i'm all about words i'm an english major too and a teacher so
i'm all about words and and i have you ever studied masaru emoto um i i've looked at some
of his stuff yes about you know the power of words and you know how it changes um how it affects um
water you know how it affects creation our words impact creation yeah i haven't studied a lot about
him but yeah i've looked at his pictures and stuff pretty cool stuff right yes yes it is
very nice yeah it's so true how like i love that like the being free academy
could be an easy switch. Like I have a lot of recorded videos
where I say the set free Academy. So and then the set free
Academy in my Academy underneath in the picture, it says break
the chains that bind you. So it's all about breaking free,
right set free. So it would be it would take some time to like
change all that over. So I'm wondering, once they get into
the program, the truth is, they are going to have some stuff to
work on. So at the moment, do I need to? I don't know if I need
to change it yet. Or if I should just like wait it out. Because I
know it's going to be a lot of work for me to go back and like
rerecord and change everything. Yeah.
Yeah. I honestly wouldn't personally worry about the title.
Because kind of like what I was talking about and how you
present yourself and where people were just like, Oh, well,
you know, you should you shouldn't look so put together
hogwash. Same thing with the title. It's like, what what is
the message that you're speaking? It when you write your
post when you talk to people in the clarity calls, what is the
message and then people will be that you it you will attract
those people regardless of the title. So then you will so you
don't have to worry that the title isn't the title isn't
holding you back. That's why I almost didn't even want to talk
about the title because I'm like, well, you know, as really
not the issue. But if that here's just a way that you could
view the title, but that won't make or break anything. It's a
great title and nothing wrong with it like it like he's like
you had always intended the title to be to be portrayed and
to be received as which it is because it is that is what the
phrase means. Set free means we already are we already are set
free. I was but so it really didn't matter. Just you just
leave it, you know, the way that it is, unless the Lord
just really has it on your heart that you need to change it. Just
that's not making or breaking anything. It's, it's, you know,
just the way that you that you talk about things and always
presenting things from a very positive perspective. Another
thing to think about taking this to, you know, expanding on all
of this is how you talk in your in your in your teachings. So
it's not just the posts. And I don't know this because I
haven't like listened to a lot of your teachings or anything.
So I'm not talking. I'm not saying Oh, look, I've noticed
this. This is just something that came up and it came in my
head that if your posts are written a certain way, most
likely you're talking like that, and you're teaching like that.
And it will help you it people will be more likely to shift
faster. And maybe when they hear your like, for instance, your
self love challenge, if they were to go the five days, they
might be more inclined to join the program. If the if the
teaching was again like that, like, like what we're talking
about, where you're talking about everything from a positive
perspective, instead of spending so much time and maybe you're
not doing this, I'm just coming up with an idea. Again, I'm not
speaking from experience here of listening to your stuff. It's
just an idea that came to my mind. If you are talking a lot
about the pain, and like, hey, you can get out of this, then it
may not attract as many people or at least the people without
poverty mindset to join your bigger program. And I don't know
how you talk and teach in your bigger program as well. But the
more that you talk about the positive, the more that it's
going to, you know, cross everything, not just your posts,
and not just your ads, but in your in your challenges, and in
your big program teaching the the, that the healthier people
that it's going to attract, that is more likely to attract, keep
and, and help them effectively shift this. So that's something
else I just wanted to expand it into is beyond just the
marketing, beyond just the calls of people that just in it. But
I'm not speaking to have me like heard you and like saying, Oh,
you're not doing this. No, I'm not.
Well, I'm doing a mix of it, right? Like I'm calling them
forward. But at the same time, I'm really focusing on, are you
here? Do you feel this way? Is this what your experience has
been? Do you still struggle with this? Well, then guess where you
could be, you could be here, like, let's envision where you
could be. So I do a bit of both. I do focus a lot more on where
they're going. But I, I definitely take I definitely
meet them where they're at, and then show them what's possible.
But I'm just like, yeah, I don't know that I'm attracting the
right people. Because I think you're right. I'm attracting the
people who are like in victim mindset, right? So they're not
as willing. And I did that, too. Yeah, you did. Yeah. And, and I
even attracted people.
poverty, mentality, that sort of that were, um, uh, that, that paid a lot of money.
They were willing to pay a lot of money and they still did.
Um, uh, and, uh, anyway, so that was, that was very interesting.
So it's not like the money can, can eliminate it.
It's, uh, again, you know, the Lord just sent them to me and all my word, I
learned so much through working with those people so much, um, good things.
And I just, I had to realize, you know what, um, God sent them to me.
Not to, not for them to get somewhere, you know, and if they didn't get somewhere,
then it said something about me and my teaching.
Cause again, like what we were talking about with the money, the issue was not
an exchange between me and the other person.
This is all about between me and the Lord.
So God just sent them to, he just needed them to be loved on.
He wanted to give them something special.
And I was the special thing he gave them.
He gave them someone to see them for who.
Sorry, my phone died.
That's okay.
Well, I can, I can let you go.
I know I've taken a lot of your time and I appreciate it all.
So anyway, I, um, that's all I was, I was going to, um, just, um, um, say about
that, but it did that, did that make sense?
Did I at least end what we were, in other words, answer your question,
but did that, did that make sense?
Did I at least end what we were, in other words, answer your question, but did
that make sense to you, did that make sense to you, did that make sense to you?
Yeah, that's wonderful.
And I've gotten some really good insight and going to tweak some messaging.
And I also gave them a lot.
I gave them, I didn't think I was giving them that much.
I knew I was giving them a lot, but I almost gave them too much.
I think where they didn't see enough of a gap to actually work with me.
What do you mean?
Like they, in the challenge, I set them up to see themselves through God's eyes
so well that when the challenge was done, they're like, I feel so good.
I don't know if I need anything more.
So I don't know if, I mean, I want to do that, but then at the same time, I also
want them to work with me longer term.
So, yeah, I know that is a very interesting, um, uh, thought and, and
that's the thing that, um, we, we want to, there's nothing wrong with giving
someone, um, everything, um, because, Hey, if that's all they need, that is
wonderful, but you and I know that's not all they need.
So what it is that we can do to help other people.
And again, this is for the help.
This isn't so that, oh, people can, um, you know, work with us longer and, you
know, give us more money or whatever the issue, you know, that, um, uh, that
people would, um, accuse accuses that, um, it's, it's helping them be able to
recognize when, what a life looks like so that they can identify again, identify
themselves in the story of what it looks like when they really have moved into
what it is that you're saying, like painting a picture and describing, this
is what this place looks like so that they can determine for themselves.
They can look at themselves and know whether or not they're here.
It's not us identifying for them, whether or not they're here.
We just paint this picture and they can do, they can determine and figure out
in their lives, whether or not they really are there, whether or not
their life looks a particular way when they interact with, as it should up
there, when they interact in their relationships, in their marriage, in
their parenting, um, when someone, um, when they don't get the promotion that
they wanted, when they felt overlooked, when, um, they struggle with their
health, how it is that they're viewing themselves.
or I don't know, whatever.
What does life look like
when you really truly have shifted into this,
when you really truly love yourself?
And this is what it looks, you know,
this is what it's like, and isn't this wonderful?
And this is the feeling, and this is the experience,
and this is the interaction that you have with other people
and dah, dah, dah, dah, and isn't this great
and isn't this wonderful?
They will be able to identify
whether or not they're doing that.
And that lets them know whether or not
they really did get out of your program,
everything it is that you want them to have stepped into.
And they might leave your program thinking,
yes, yes, I've gotten there, I feel so much better,
which is how we do when we leave sessions
and we leave conferences.
Oh my goodness, my world has changed.
And then we hit real life,
you know, or the same thing after a sermon.
You know, we leave church and we all think,
oh, my life has changed.
And then, you know, as soon as we get home,
you know, we go back to, we go back to normal.
We might just feel better about it,
but we go back to normal.
And so if that,
so they might do the same thing with your challenge,
but they, it will give them an opportunity
to have time to, and for life to happen,
where they recognize that they are not
in the place that you described.
So we don't have to identify how they,
how there's a gap.
We just have to identify the truth.
They can discover their own gap
and they can identify their own gap.
We only ever talk to the positive.
I'm just making a note here.
So maybe to support them at this point,
might be good to do some posts on,
you know, you've done the self-love challenge,
which name is going to be changed for the next one,
but you've done the self-love challenge
and now you're experiencing more of God's love.
Like if you've really experienced that amazing shift
that you wanted at the beginning of the challenge,
this is what you might feel right now.
And then, you know, talk a little bit about that.
And like, is this how you're feeling?
And, you know, and then like something
along those lines, maybe just to help.
Without talking about you,
this is what you might feel like you,
let them find themselves.
Just talking about, this is what life is like.
And this is how, you know, a relationship, you know,
so now that you, or, you know,
I'm trying to speak theoretically to something
without having something very practical and concrete,
but just this idea where instead of telling them,
oh, you know, do you feel like this?
Do you connect with this?
Instead of doing that,
you just talk about something over here
and let them make the journey to compare themselves to it
as opposed to bringing it to their level,
asking like spoon-feeding them and hand-holding them too.
Okay, do you feel like this?
Yes, yes I do.
Okay, so now here's the next step.
Do you wanna come up here?
Okay, well, I'm having somebody walk with me
step-by-step in the process.
Don't try to like handhold and babysit
and process them through all of these steps
because they'll always rely on you that way.
To walk them emotionally or mentally through,
let them find themselves.
You want people who are healthier.
I have people in my life
that I would love to take the rest intensive.
And these are people that love and support me.
And they, but they are not in a place
where they can,
that they can own it for themselves.
And they've heard me talk about it.
They've heard, they're connected with me on Facebook.
They support me with loves and likes
and actually it's just wonderful.
And I see how you're changing.
You know, the way that they word it is,
oh, Ashley, I see how people's lives are changing.
Oh, I'm just so supportive and this is so wonderful.
And I'm thinking, you need this so much
that they have to find it.
I can't tell them, hey, look, you need this.
And hey, by the way, I wanted to offer this to you.
I do not want to offer it to people.
Even people I love, I don't want to offer it.
So yeah, so I, a way to think about it
is even like not even telling them,
you know, you might be experiencing this right now.
You might, whatever.
In a way, they've been thinking about themselves too much.
So be someone that isn't always talking about themselves.
them. But that's always there. Because they're always focusing
on how do I feel? They're telling me that I need to feel
about how I need to think about what it is I feel and how is it
that I feel and how I shifted into this water. Let them find
it, let them ask themselves their own questions and come up
with their own questions and what to ask themselves. And you'd
be that someone that just paints this picture of what life looks
like. And the fact that you're there and you're not abandoning
them, and they're so excited that someone's not abandoning
them. And someone thinks that, oh, life can look like this. Do
I want to choose for myself that I want my life to look like
that? Let them allow themselves to compare to the picture that
you're painting, as opposed to asking, do you think what do you
think about how you compare to this picture? You know, or you
might be feeling this right now, you might let them feel what
they want, think what they want, whatever. And please don't hear
what I'm not saying. I'm not trying to tear down your ideas
at all. I'm saying if you're trying to attract certain
people, these are tips and tricks that I've learned of how
they receive how I'm talking, they receive it as too much is
so much help that there's nothing for them to do. And I
was just attracting the wrong people. And I did not know
that's how they were getting it. I thought they were feeling
loved, because I was trying to love them. And that's what
you're doing. You're trying to love everybody. But they don't
receive it in the way that we thought.
So, yeah. So did you say don't help them so much that they feel
like there's nothing for them to do?
Oh, no, I'm sorry. No, that that's a that's a that's a great
thing. And it's what I was talking about is it's the same
thing that I said, I keep trying to think is there a different
way I could wear this because I know it's hard is if you were
saying oh, you know, okay, now it's time kind of like in with
your I would recommend is one of the ways you could do it to not
prompt set up a time where you're prompting people to
compare themselves to where they it with your words, where it is
that they could be or what it is they should be experienced or
what it is they could be experiencing. Don't prompt them
for that. Let them do it. Let them decide to do it for
themselves. And one way that you can trigger them to choose to,
to, to, to find that for themselves is, oh, wow, no wonder
I'm having a hard time thinking I have not eaten today. I had
not thought about this. Okay. Why can I not think today? I
have not eaten. Okay. But in just just instead be like, you
know, just just painting this picture, people naturally
subconsciously compare themselves to a picture that
they paint that that they see, and they subconsciously ask
themselves, Am I there? And do I have that? And then all that
you're doing is you're providing them an opportunity to step into
it as they if they want to, as opposed to saying, Hey, look,
this is what life can look like, isn't this wonderful? I hope
that you have a good life, but you're offering them an
opportunity that they can take to step into that. In other
words, you're giving them hope that you're not. But at the same
time, you're not prompting them to compare themselves with your
words like, okay, now, now is the time of the of the session
where we're gonna where I'm inviting you to compare
yourself to this place where you might want to be to
discover whether or not you're there yet. So let's all think
about are you there yet? I recommend don't adding that
aspect in strictly because of how it takes away the ownership
of someone else to walk themselves through that process.
And, and then there's one more thing that I wanted to say that
I thought about, but but it might, it might kind of change
the subject just a little bit. So I want to make sure that I
don't take you on if you had something else you wanted to ask
or say about that. No, it's okay. Go ahead. Okay. And that
is about you were talking, painting a picture. One of the
ways that I that I use, and that I found very helpful to help
paint a picture for other people that they can compare themselves
to is testimonies, asking people in the rest intensive, you've
gone through it to post their testimonies. Why? Because they
themselves are painting a picture of what their life now
looks like. So that's in there. But it's all from a positive
perspective. It's all like, oh my gosh, you know, yeah, they do
talk about the fact that, oh, you know, this is what I used to
think. And this is what I used to think. But have you noticed
that once people shift into rest, and once people have
have the, um, have the freedom, they don't want to talk about the pain anymore.
So the pain and the struggle, if you go back and you look through all of those
testimonies from Amy and Carrie and Susan and everybody else, they talk very, very
little about the pain that they went to, because by the time that they give their
testimony, they've shifted so much.
They don't need to talk about it.
Yuck.
He wants to do that.
They do it to just kind of give people an idea of the gap that they have crossed,
but they talk so much more about the positive.
So what they're doing is they're all painting a picture for anybody who views
it, uh, Hey, look, this is now what life looks like.
And other people subconsciously they're viewing it or like, what
if my life looks like that?
And they realized it doesn't.
Like, I don't know if you saw Carrie's, um, uh, Carrie's post, uh, this morning
in the rest in the five-day rest intensive about the migraines.
Did you see that one?
Okay.
So that's really good.
She had been, um, she'd had a, my, she hasn't had migraines for 10 months since
she started the rest intensive in April.
And she says that she has had migraines every two weeks, every two to four
weeks, um, since, uh, she was 15 years old.
And when she started the rest intensive for 10 months, she has not had a migraine.
And she says she noticed a migraine coming on, um, uh, like three days ago,
and it really came to a head, no pun intended, came to a head.
This morning.
And she asked, she's like, okay, I just can't see it anymore.
I've been talking to my soul and my body and declare it.
And, you know, as a good cane, telling it that it's healed and it's just not working.
So she asked her, her husband, um, can you go, she knew there was some area in
her life in which she was shifting into rest and she wasn't shifting into rest.
So she made a good decision.
She's like, okay, where is my faith that I'm, I'm trying this.
I'm trying that.
And apparently it's, it's not pushing through.
So where is my faith that where's my peace at?
And I will, there is no, therefore now no condemnation from the Lord.
He gives me good gifts, including in Tylenol and Advil.
So I'm going to declare the Lord to be that good.
So even though I wanted to believe this, and even though I wanted to believe this,
you know, uh, this is where apparently my piece of that, this is apparently the
level of faith that I have today.
So I will declare God good, that he gave me good things and I will
take it and thank him for it.
So she asked him to, she sent him for Advil and he said, honey, I'm
sorry, I can't find any Advil.
And they had two little boys at home, you know, four month old and a three year old.
And so, you know, he, he like can't leave the house with all of these kids, you
know, to go get her Tylenol and Advil.
And she was like, okay, what am I going to do?
So she's like, okay, all right, Lord, there is no Advil.
And so what else do, what else do I need to do?
So she said that the Lord told her, if you believe that you are healed, then
you will stand, then you will then stand up and act like you're healed.
And this is a big thing in healing that we do, that we have to act like we're healed.
I had to do it with my foot several months ago.
I think I posted a personal testimony about it in the Rest Intensive a few
months ago, back in August, maybe.
Oh no, I did it in the, I talked about it in the Q and A.
I remember the situation though with your foot.
Yeah.
Do you remember that one?
Okay.
Yeah.
How I talked to it and I just said, no, if you're healed, this is what we're going
to do, and this is, this is how we would normally access is what we're going to do.
And again, I'm having to grow and how I'm having to learn.
So it was a test.
I was, I was, I was trying, I was, I was making progress.
I wasn't leaping from zero to a hundred, but I was, I was making an effort and it
worked then, so she was doing the same thing.
She's like, okay, God, God is telling me if I, if I really am healed,
that I'm going to act like it.
So I have the faith to believe that that's what God told me.
So that's what I'm going to act on.
And so she stood up and she's like, oh, it's immediately going to be healed.
It wasn't so she, it just started pounding and she's like, oh my word, if I'm not
careful, I'm going to throw up.
So she's like, nope, what would I do?
I'm telling my butt, my soul, my body.
No, you are healed.
I'm declaring that that's true.
So she went and took a shower and she said her, her migraine started to dissipate.
It had been coming on for three days.
It was pounding and her migraine was going away.
So when people post stuff like that, people subconsciously, she doesn't have
to ask them any questions in this testimony.
They hear that and they think, have I ever experienced that?
No, I haven't.
She has something.
I don't, I want it.
So it, so I use testimonies like that as well.
It's the same thing, whether I'm talking in, in, in, in, in a teaching or I I'm
asking people to have if you know, they have it on their hearts to give a
testimony, but they do that.
And it's the point of it is to paint a picture for people that they can see.
This is what life looks like for somebody else.
They subconsciously, they identify their own gap.
I don't want to identify for someone else how far away it is that they are.
They make that determination. I don't care how far away it is they are. All I want to know is
how serious they are in traversing whatever gap they have. That's all that I care about.
Yeah. No, honestly, that's powerful stuff. And you've given me a ton to think about,
which is amazing. My next challenge will probably look very different. It'll be about
experiencing God's love. I'm excited for you. And yeah, this has been an interesting shift.
And I don't have a lot of people who've gone through my program yet to give like proper
testimonies. So I just get to keep working on that. So yeah. So yeah. And you don't you don't
need that. I was just giving you that example of that's another way in which so that you could
kind of get my idea of what I was saying about what it looks like to present. This is what life
can look like. One of the ways that is through a testimony, but it didn't have to look like
for a testimony. That's just an idea that I was like, OK, she sees that and she's like, oh, that's
what it's like to like painting a picture where you're not asking someone a question, but they
automatically try to compare their own situation to that and wonder what's the gap? Am I there or
not? People will do it for themselves. So you can tell your share your own testimony. You can,
again, focus more on the positive than on the pain, but at least getting an idea of the pain
where they can see the gap that you traverse and they can see, oh, wow, someone can do it.
Then apparently it's possible as opposed to, oh, well, they really didn't have a reason to go.
And then it's also just talking about this is what this is. This is reality that someone can expect.
And there's different ways that you can do it. You just talk about what it talks about
in scripture and use it. And this is a huge deal. And so we can say that. And then
we can go really big deal here. When you when you talk, talk from what it is that you own
in your life, not what it is that you know in your head is the truth, but what you know
and what you walk out because that will set you apart from the crowd.
For instance, Amy tells me that there's a and she mentioned this the other day
that that there she mentioned this in the in the five day rest intensive to she said, actually,
I don't she and I listen to a lot of the same people. And she said, actually, I don't hear
anybody say it exactly the way that you do. And it's because I have to take this information that
that she and I've heard in other in other conferences. There are things that I talk about
about rest that I've never heard anywhere else. And so I'm going to take this information and
we're out. But there are things that I talk about, about like the foundation of how to shift
that we have to be aware of about our identity or body, soul, and spirit and how it operates
or whatever. It's kind of a platform of, okay, now that we know that, okay, how do we shift
interest from knowing this? Some of a lot of that stuff, some of that stuff was flushed out for me
on my own. But as the base and the foundation where it originally, I originally heard it
was from other people. It was through the Lord to my spirit through other people. And so I teach
the same thing that someone else taught me, or the same thing in the Bible. If you're reading the
Bible and you're like, there's all of this knowledge that I see. And God says, I should
believe this. And God says, this is true. And yes, because God said it, I obviously believe it.
But if your life isn't manifesting it, then it's something that you know, but not something that
you own when you own something. And when you talk and teach out of what it is that you've
owned, you live it, you stay, you literally stake your life on it. You stick your life,
your reputation, your marriage, the aspects in which you, you, you stake, um, your, your life
in those, in this particular trees, if you talk and teach out of those things, that is what will
transform people's lives. It's not the knowledge that you're regurgitating because you think that
you're supposed to believe it because God says it in the Bible, but your life doesn't reflect it yet
because you're, you're, you're still learning to move into those rare measures, or you heard a
teaching on it this past Sunday or whatever. Um, it, uh, that has made a huge difference for me.
That is what, um, created my, my sound and frequency in my message. That is what creates
the rest intensive, the rest intensive in a way don't do it. I'm not saying the rest intensive
is me. It is the unique way in which God's spirit in my.
Spirit is united, becomes its own special frequency and speaks into the earth.
So when I speak these truths, it's all the same truths that you're going to find that you find in the Bible.
This is not special to me, but because I owned it and it's in those truths are coming through my frequency instead of through your frequency,
they're going to sound in a particular way and they're going to impact people in a particular way.
Then if they heard it from you, it might be just as impactful, but it's going to be different.
So give them that. That is what will make your program transformative.
It's not just that it's you. It's it's not in a way.
The way to think of it is because you are partnering with the Lord in giving this to people.
The fact that God wants to use you instead of speaking directly to their spirits without even being exposed to your program,
the fact that he brought your program in to partner with them means that there's a way in which he desired to impact and talk to those other people through yours
and his spirits uniting and having a unique frequency as opposed to his frequency alone just to them.
So, in other words, your participation and what it is that you've owned and how your frequency speaks that message,
what it is that you believe about it and the two of you operate from, take that truth and manifest it from the spirit into creation is what will make,
is what God intends by having brought them into your path to make the difference in their lives.
So don't discount, discredit or or stifle, ignore your ownership of the information because your ownership of that truth is what will impact other people.
That is the sound that they're going to hear that brings life because you are a life giving spirit.
What does God say about the words? He says his words, he said they're living words.
God wants you to speak his living words because you're the life giving spirit, not dead words that are just words that you read.
OK, think about the things in the New Testament.
Those are words about how wonderful and great all of these things are that we can receive from the Lord.
The law, if we look at the Old Testament, the Old Testament is full of words, too.
But it brought forth the law, even though it's holy, brought forth, caused death in the hearer.
While the words that are that from the from the New Covenant are words, both are words from God, God is the one who spoke the Ten Commandments.
And God speaks the words that come out of the New Covenant.
But the thing is, so in other words, the point is, it's not just repeating words to someone else.
It's not simply repeating truth that's important.
It's the fact that it has to have it that it's it's the fact that the words are are living and breathing from God and you have to keep them living and breathing.
They come from God to you and you spread that life giving spirit.
You're not reading words out of the Old or the New Testament, even the New Testament, and then speaking them.
You, your life giving spirit funnels that funnels the fact that they are living words from God that haven't even been verbalized or written out in English or in any other language.
And you and you and you own it and project that through your life giving spirit and that is what will impact other people in your program.
It's not regurgitating the Bible and phrasing it in a different way.
It's your life giving spirit that is expressing living words that have never even hit a hit a
A written or spoken language.
Words are spirit.
And words existed before there was language because God spoke creation into being before he ever created language.
Wow.
Yeah, where does spirit that is that is what created and that is what still creates that is how how that's the impact that you're having you are part of your manifestation of spirit into the earth is creating by using words and it's not your spoken words.
And just like it's God's it's not God's spoken words to you. It's an expression of himself that he's pouring into you that it what he calls word.
And you are putting that out into other people in your word is hitting other in your words are hitting other people that you don't even talk to
Because word has absolutely nothing to do with language and nothing that comes out of our mouth. It can man.
The best that is one of the ways in which words manifest into the earth is through spoken word. But that's why. So anyway, that's my point when God taught. I just wanted to highlight the point, the importance of the fact that God talks about things being
Write this down because you're very visual and so
You maybe remember this living word living. It's not words living words. It's very, very, very powerful and it's more than just more than just spoken. So anyway,
So that's, that's the background of why I highly recommend that you own you speak and you teach from what you live.
Not what you think would be helpful to someone else.
They can go read the Bible. God sent him to your program because they needed you.
Yeah, now it's about like actually living that out and like putting it into practice, which this is a lot of the stuff that you teach me is like pretty new kind of concept for me. So yeah, it's really interesting to
Just like reflect on all of this and
It's, it gives me so much to think about. I love it. Thank you.
You're welcome. I'm sorry. Yeah, we've been talking for three hours. So kudos to you.
Like overload.
You are such a help and I took lots of notes and yeah, this has been awesome. So thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And
Yeah, have a have a great night and a great weekend and
Things
A couple hours.
I
Yeah, like, I hope we can still continue to do calls. I don't know what it will look like yet on your end, but I, I have the intention that I'd still like to
You know, work with you and all of that. So we'll just kind of see whatever the Lord reveals to you and that you reveal to us and then we'll go from there.
Okay. All right. Well, sounds good.
All right. Well, thank you so much. And yeah, we'll be in touch soon. I'm sure.
Sounds good. Talk to you later. Alana.
Thanks for your time.
You too. Bye.