Hello, welcome.
So glad to have you all joining us.
Happy Monday evening.
Hello, hello, hello.
Welcome.
Hi, beautiful ladies.
If y'all can turn your cameras on for those that are able, would love to see you as always.
There we go.
I see some more beautiful faces.
Hi, hi, hi.
Welcome.
If you're new and you're joining us for the first time, if you've never been here for
a live session before, let us know in the chat that you're joining us so we can welcome
you.
We want to make sure that we can kind of give you a little bit of a shout out.
Anyone new?
Anyone new tonight?
You've never been here before?
Welcome back to all my ladies that have been here before.
Okay, Janie, welcome.
She's new tonight.
Sarah's new.
Awesome.
Yeah, that's totally fine, Sarah.
When you get home and get settled.
Welcome back, Rebecca.
Tamika's new tonight.
So welcome, ladies.
As people continue to join us, I'm going to go ahead and get started.
It's so great to be here with you this evening.
If you've never met me before, I'm Bethany Cooper.
I'm one of the Master Heartwork Coaches here in our community, and I'm on staff with Last
Year Single and just love being a part of what God is doing in this movement of kingdom
families and marriages.
People's lives are getting just radically changed and it's been an exciting few years
and I believe we've just scratched the surface.
And so you all are here for such a time as this.
And I believe God has something incredible for you in this season.
No matter what week you're on, when you joined us, that you would continue to pray and lean
in to what is the Holy Spirit saying to you personally today that we would every day.
I was praying this afternoon and just standing out to my spirit again tonight, you know,
for fresh manna.
For fresh manna.
When they were in the wilderness and they were going through the wilderness, God actually
caused the manna to spoil if they tried to keep it.
Well, why do you think that is?
Because we need fresh.
We need fresh revelation, fresh insight from the Lord every single time.
And so tonight, that's one of the things we're going to do here in a minute.
We'll pray, but just want you to be kind of leaning into that concept even as you go through
the heartwork.
Like, Father, what is something new you want to speak to me today that God wants to encounter
you in a fresh way through this heartwork process and beyond.
It doesn't stop when you finish heartwork, y'all.
Heartwork is a lifetime journey.
I've been coaching with the community for four years.
I'm almost three year anniversary mark coming up and all the time, there's just things that
God continues to highlight and reveal for healing.
And I'm so grateful for the tools that I gained through this program.
So I want to encourage you all to think of it in those terms that what you're learning
here are tools to serve you the rest of your life.
Haley, welcome for your first time joining us as well.
So as a reminder, ladies, definitely check out Supernatural Saturday Replay, even if
you've already heard it.
This is one that I'm telling you all, if you listen to it even more than once, you're going
to gain insight and revelation.
That is actually, I text Jackie after she did that live and I said, this is one we need
to turn into a product.
It was so good.
There's a lot of people that don't know the difference between discernment, intuition
and suspicion.
Some people don't even know what the gift of discernment is and there's no shame on
that or anything, but man, it was so good.
So please check that out.
That's under your replay tab.
Also, if you didn't know, every Sunday we put up what we call our weekly roll call post.
This is a time for you to check in with us.
Let us know how you're doing.
What week of the heart work are you on?
Also we're tying that into the Supernatural Saturday just to kind of help you unpack that
a little bit more.
Like how is God speaking to you directly through the Supernatural Saturday messages?
The last one I have for you on housekeeping tonight is stay in the game, ladies, okay?
And not that anybody isn't, but this is what the Lord put on my heart to share is the last
housekeeping today.
Stay in the game.
Don't quit.
Keep going.
Resist distractions.
The enemy is going to try to oppose you any way he can, and he often goes for those areas
that we tend to get tripped up the most.
So if you're, you know, things going wrong with your kids is your weak spot, guess what?
He's going to go after that.
He is.
So just be prepared.
We don't need to be afraid of the enemy or those opposing forces.
We just need to understand what's going on, that that resistance actually is a good sign,
ladies.
It means you're moving forward.
It means the enemy doesn't want you to move forward, so he's trying to create that resistance
to keep you back.
But praise God, if you keep moving, guess what?
You're going to overcome that thing through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Remember it's not by might nor by power, but it's by the Spirit of the Lord that we can
do anything, even heart work.
And so please pray daily to partner with the Holy Spirit to walk and step with you,
to counsel you, to comfort you as you're walking.
through the heart work.
And I want you to remember this,
Jesus is sitting at the right hand of the Father,
right now, interceding for you.
Every day, that's where he's sitting.
He's sitting at the right hand of the Father,
interceding for us.
And so many times we read that in scripture
and we kind of brush over it.
But let's take some time this week to think on,
like, what does it mean for you personally,
to know that Jesus is interceding for you,
Jovita, Mandy, Haley, Amy, by name.
He's like, man, this is my girl.
She's doing so great.
I wish she knew how much I loved her
and how much I believe in her.
He's already won the victory for us, ladies.
He's praying and interceding for us to step into it.
Every day, he wants us to get the freedom
and the breakthrough that he died to give us.
Amen.
I'm gonna pray for us.
Father, thank you so much.
Just for who you are, thank you for your presence.
I can feel you here in the room.
I'm so grateful that we get to be a part of your family,
God, that you sent your son
so that we could be grafted into the family of God.
And I'm so, so grateful.
No matter what we experienced in this world,
maybe some have experienced abandonment,
feeling like they're alone,
feeling like they're an orphan or just disregarded,
discarded, whatever those thoughts and feelings are, God,
I thank you that you administer to them tonight,
that you would help them to hear
the truth of heaven over them.
God, we thank you that you would bring things
out of darkness into the light
so there can be revelation, insight,
healing, transformation, God.
We're asking for supernatural encounters and understanding,
God, that you'll connect dots like supernaturally,
things that we've been seeking you for for years, God,
that it would all of a sudden just start to come together.
We thank you, God, that your promises are yes
and amen for us.
You're not a man that you would lie.
God, we thank you that you fulfill your promises to us,
that we can partner with you daily
to walk into the fullness of everything you have planned
for us, including our love stories.
I know that's what you've done for me, Lord.
I pray that you would increase their faith tonight,
help them to receive the truth of what you have for them.
I also pray for just, yeah, Lord,
the balm of Gilead being placed upon minds, bodies,
hearts, spirits, souls,
that you would heal them in the depths of their being.
In Jesus' name, amen.
Praise the Lord, he's so good, you all.
Today is June 16th.
You all, as many years as I've been coaching,
I've never been able to coach on a 6-16 date.
And so yesterday when I realized, I'm like, oh my gosh,
I get to coach on 6-16.
Why does that matter?
Well, if you recall,
when you went through the live challenge,
if you all saw, maybe some of you
didn't see the live challenge,
when Jackie talked about the ancient of days
has ancient ways, Jeremiah 6, 16, ladies,
which is one of our banner scriptures in this community.
This is what it says, stand at the crossroads and look.
So imagine if you're standing at a crossroads
in your life right now, I believe that you are,
you're here by divine appointment,
and you're looking at the different ways that you can walk.
And this is what it says, ask for the ancient paths,
ask where the good way is and walk in it.
And you will find rest for your souls.
And then it goes on, but you said, we will not walk in it.
So let's not be that, let's not be like that.
Let's walk in what God is showing us.
And everyday ladies, sometimes we might feel like,
well, I don't know for sure, what does that even mean?
How do I know which one is the right one?
Especially if we've really had
a lot of these counterfeit identities
that we've been listening to things through in the past.
But I promise as you continue to heal,
as you continue to read the word of God,
you're gonna start to know the voice
and the heart of the father more and more and more.
And as you heal those counterfeit identities,
they're gonna start to fall away,
literally off your mind, off your body, off your spirit.
And you're gonna hear more clearly,
and you're gonna know the good path
and the way to walk in it.
Also, just on that side of things,
the word says that he would be a lamp unto our feet
and a light unto our path.
So he's gonna light your path, just keep seeking him, okay?
So I wanted to encourage you all with that.
Like we're at this place, we're at this pivotal point
in our lives where we get to look
at what's going on in these directions.
And hey, Lord, which one is the good way?
And we're gonna talk in a little bit about the good,
like what is God's version of good
versus our version of good?
You know, what we think is good
is just very small understanding of what's really good.
You all, I cannot tell you enough how glad I am
that I listened to the Lord in choosing Brian,
that I let go of all my old ways.
days of choosing. I allowed my heart to get healed. And God
led me into a relationship with someone I actually may not have
chosen in the past, but God knew exactly what I needed. And then
some and it's been an amazing blessing. So just want to
deposit that and encourage you all just continue to seek God
every day and take the next best step. And he will lead you
further into those blessings and promises. Alright, so I'm going
to activate you in the chat. Just curious, have any of you in
the last week experienced a negative emotion at all? If you
have, if you've experienced a negative emotion at all, I would
love for you to put in the chat what that negative emotion was.
You don't have to tell me what happened. You don't have to tell
me why. I just want to know what your negative emotion was. Okay,
we got rejection, insecurity, anxiety, anger, overwhelmed,
shame, got another anxiety, anger, I might have a hard time
keeping up. It's good. Y'all are coming in. Let's see.
Rejection, insecurity, frustration, I just slow down
grief, doubt, I'm trying to look for ones that haven't been said
yet. Shame, discouragement, disappointment, feeling
inadequate. So that can even tie into insecurity. Those are
identity, you know, core things there. Sadness, frustration,
anger, mistrust, unforgiveness. All right, let's see fear. I
just wanna make sure we're hitting some of these ones that
haven't been said yet. Blame. Okay, so blame would be more of
a lie that you're believing most likely there's probably an
emotion or feeling underneath of that. Let's see here. Annoyed,
frustration, hopeless. Okay, I haven't seen that one yet. And
then unknown confusion. Okay, awesome. Thanks for sharing in
the chat, ladies. Here's why we did that. I want you to be
thinking about these emotions that you put in the chat and you
can continue to put them in there for us. Disrespected,
default, disrespected. Emotion, feeling stuck. Okay. Loneliness.
There's another overwhelmed. Okay, is we're going to do the
revealing for healing cycle tonight. I'm going to unpack
this for you a little bit more. Jackie hit on this in the videos
for week three, even if you're not in week three, guess what,
it's totally okay. So you can be in week one, week five, and I'm
in here coaching on something that might be touched on in
week three. But the core of all of this is that I haven't I
haven't taught this for about a month and a half. And it's going
to help all of you. Okay, it's going to help every single one
of you know how to implement that healing for revealing for
healing cycle worksheet that is included in your week three. So
basically, I'm going to coach you through what you know what
each topic means, what each circle means. And then I'm going
to break it down from my own life and give you an example.
I'm going to talk through a little bit more content, I'm
going to put you in breakout rooms. And then I'm literally
going to coach the remainder of the time, because I'm going to
help you all those of you that we have time to get into the
kind of the seat, if you will, to share live, we'll help you
unpack what you share kind of in alignment with the revealing for
healing cycle to kind of start connecting more dots. All right.
So we want you to remember, you can't replace events, ladies, we
can't go back and change what we've done or what's been done
to us. All we can do is replace the lies that we've believed as
a result of those things. So every day, we want to be asking
the Lord, you know, not only what is the root, what is the
first time that this happened to me, but we want to be asking the
Lord, what are the lies I believe as a result of them?
Because if we know the lies, then we can also seek the Lord
for the truth. And the truth is what sets us free, right? Okay,
but we also need to know how to apply the truth, right? Because
truly, if you think about it, a lot of us know the truth, we
hear the truth when we go to church, but leave and don't get
breakthrough sometimes, isn't that true? I know that's
happened for me before. And so the key is that we have to learn
how to apply the truth. So just like the blood of Jesus Christ,
yes, when you give your life to him, it covers you, you are
you're healed, you're set free, all that. But, but so often, we
don't know actually how to apply the blood to the areas that we
need the greatest breakthrough. So part of the journey in heart
healing is you're learning how to apply the blood of Jesus
Christ, the truth to these areas so that you can actually have
breakthrough. Alright, so I'm going to share my screen with
you. All right, can y'all see that? Yeah. All right. So this
is what we call in last year single the revealing for healing
cycle. The the kind of key here is that you keep an
in mind. Some of you things that are going to come up while I'm talking this evening
aren't going to be like in order. Okay, so what do I mean by that? We typically start with the
negative emotion. What's a negative emotion that you are experiencing that you have felt? Again,
it could, like I did tonight, it could be in the last week, it could have been today,
it could have been years ago, right? But not everybody can even identify their emotions.
Some people actually have a hard time identifying their emotion, but they might have a lie that
they're believing that that's what comes to mind for you or a painful memory. No matter where you
start, the key then is to kind of go back and ask the Lord to help you unpack the other circles,
if you will. Tonight, I'm going to start with the negative emotion. Okay, so we start with the pink
circle, negative emotions. And my example for you all, this is another key, I'm so sorry.
This is another key, you're going to want to be really specific, okay? So typically,
a lot of us will say, I feel fear. And that's true, we feel fear. But what kind of fear? What
is it connected to? Who is it associated with? So for example, mine is, and I am not struggling
with any of these things. Now, I want to preface this tonight, I want you all to know, I've gotten
a massive breakthrough from all this. But I'm just sharing these things to help you all kind
of get some more revelation and insight. So that you can, even if you have completely different
life experiences, for me, you can start to see how different things connected in your own life,
so that you can, again, get more revelation and understanding, which then hopefully will lead you
to freedom. All right, my negative emotion was fear, but specifically fear around men. Okay,
especially if I didn't know them, or men that would try to have any kind of controlling,
domineering kind of behavior over me. All right, some negative emotion for me was fear around men.
And I've had other things too. But again, this is the example I'm giving tonight. Painful memory,
the way I like to describe painful memories is it's like an overarching, kind of like an umbrella
memory, kind of general. And then the trauma stories fall up under that, like the handle
of the umbrella, if you will, okay, or the little spokes that are underneath all holding that
umbrella up. Okay, painful memory for me, abused by men. So that's the overarching
painful memory. Now, here are some of the trauma stories. These are, again, more specific and
important that they're specific when we're processing them. I experienced sexual abuse by
my brothers and sister when I was little. Then, as I got older, there were a couple actually
other stories in here, I'm not going to share them tonight, but all had like abuse or some
kind of sexual thing that happened to me at the hands of other people. I experienced emotional,
mental, spiritual abuse, etc. with my husband. So that was another trauma story. And then I have
these other two that I shared for a very, very long time, I did not even remember these, like
happened or occurred or anything. But when I was going through the heart work, this is where it's
really important, ladies for you to not dismiss things that happened to you, or minimize them,
because somebody told you it wasn't that big of a deal. Or maybe you told yourself that,
or whatever. The first one is when I was younger, I was in elementary school, I don't remember what
age my mom took us to someone's house, I think for some kind of home interiors party that was
like real big back in that day. I did not know the person's house, I didn't know who they were.
But all the kids were sent upstairs to play. Well, there was this one boy in particular,
that just the whole time all the kids were playing, he was very just he didn't feel safe.
Well, his whole attempt was to get all the kids, all the other kids out of the room. He because
there was two rooms upstairs, the kids were kind of running back and forth and playing in. But he
tried to lock me in this bedroom by myself with him. He like even moved a dresser in front of the
door. Y'all, this was so down in my subconscious that when it came up, it was like, it felt like a
movie. Like, is this real? Did this actually happen? Like, am I making this up? Same kind of
thing when my the sexual abuse came up very similar. It was in my mind, I thought I was like
imagining and creating it, which, of course, I felt kind of like, Whoa, I'm like, really messed
up if I'm making that up. Well, I wasn't making any of these things up, y'all. But when that stuff
comes up out of our subconscious, because we really we have kind of in a sense been protected,
and we've forgotten that stuff. But when it comes up, that's how we can then in that moment start
to process. So
That was another situation.
Thankfully, nothing happened in that.
I want you to know.
My sister actually plowed that door down
and we left out of there, praise the Lord.
But I want you all to know that's another one.
And then in high school,
I had a friend that was supposed to be my best friend.
And this is how it's really important, ladies,
for us to really look at who our friends are
and how they treat us.
Now, obviously, we're not all back in high school,
but let's even look at our friends today.
Are they doing things that are setting you up for success
or trying to use you for their own enjoyment or fun,
if you will?
My best friend, we were hanging out.
There was a kind of a party and we were all at this house
and she put this ball in my shirt
and pushed me in the bathroom.
And then it was like this game to her.
She had this guy that we went to high school with.
She basically assigned him to come and get the ball.
We all, I panicked, I freaked out.
Nobody knew what I had been through.
I didn't even remember, but I remember like,
I mean, I fought him.
Like he thought it was funny the whole time.
I did not think it was funny.
And so it was a big thing, a rift between my friend and I,
but I want you all to see each one of these things
was all linking to abused by men.
This is what men do, okay?
So lies believed are revealed.
The lie, number one,
I'm just gonna give you two examples tonight.
All men are abusive.
That's what I believed for a really long time.
Even though my grandfather was amazing,
never abused me ever in my life,
I still believe the lie that all men are abusive
because I believed at that time that at some point
they were gonna really let me know who they were.
That's what I believed.
Lie number two, I need to be afraid of men.
So now I'm gonna show you the truth that God revealed to me
and he revealed it to me first,
and this is how I like to do it.
Ladies, you can do it any way you want.
I look at the lies I believe,
and then I literally ask God for the opposite of it, okay?
So I'm now at the lies believed are revealed,
and now we're walking all the way through the circle
to God reveals the truth.
That's where I'm taking you right now.
So truth number one, you, Bethany,
don't have to fear or be afraid.
And then after I get the opposite declaration,
I look for scripture to support that.
Isaiah 41.10, so do not fear for I am with you.
Do not be dismayed for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41.13, for I am the Lord your God
who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,
do not fear, I will help you.
Here's another truth.
I can trust God to protect me.
Psalm 121 verses seven through eight that says,
the Lord will keep you from all harm.
He will watch over your life.
The Lord will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.
And I always feel like I should address
the elephant in the room.
I think it's super important.
I'm gonna stop screen share so I can see you all.
You know, what I get a lot of times people will say,
well, okay, if God will protect me,
and if I don't have to fear or be afraid,
then why did he allow me to get abused in the first place?
So I just want you all to know
that is something I wrestled with myself.
If that is where you're at,
wanna encourage you to continue
to just be honest with the Lord about it.
When I started being honest with him,
he helped me process it and see truth,
but I am gonna give you some truth.
The truth is, is God gives everyone free will.
Out of his love for us,
he gives every single one of us free will.
We have a choice of what we're gonna do with that free will.
Unfortunately, sometimes people choose to do unhealthy
and harmful things with their free will.
But in all of those situations,
I really want you all to know,
and when I was younger, I couldn't always see it,
but when I look back now,
there are so many times where I can recognize
God was providing a way out.
Someone came home early, you know,
my sister came through the door and got me out of there,
you know, and I'm not saying it was like that every time.
I definitely went through things that were very hard,
but I recognize God with me, protecting me through it all.
Does that make sense?
And so I wanna encourage you all,
whatever your situations are,
that you would ask the Lord to reveal to you,
where was he when you were encountering the trauma,
to reveal himself to you in that situation
and help you hear what his spirit
wants to tell you about it.
What is his heart towards you when that was happening?
He wants you to know these things,
but sometimes we have to have the courage to ask him
and he'll start to reveal those things to you.
I wanna also talk about the heart being a womb.
We touched on this last week.
I wanna build on it a little bit more.
be thinking about what do you allow to go into your heart?
And that everything that goes into your heart is going to be
reproduced. So if we are thinking on a bunch of lies, if
we're thinking on a bunch of painful emotions, guess what,
ladies, a lot of that's going to get reproduced in your life.
Okay. If we're taking in harmful content on, you know, we talked
this afternoon a little bit about if you tend to struggle
with a lot of anxiety and fear, highly recommend you don't watch
scary movies, or very high violence kind of chaotic,
intense shows, because that's just feeding that fear and
anxiety in you. Okay. And I know it's like, man, I just want to
be able to watch it. Well guard your we want to guard our hearts
and our minds through Christ Jesus, we want to put a gate at
the front of our hearts and say, Okay, yeah, okay, maybe other
people can watch this, but this is not helpful for me. And so
I'm going to not do that. If you struggle with lust, I would
really encourage you to not be watching a bunch of movies and
shows that have tons of lust in them. Okay, because that's how
the enemy gets his way in. And so many in the world today,
including Christian circles, we just have excused because well,
everyone else is doing it. You know, so just be really careful.
There's a lot of soft porn out there now for real. It's just
coming infiltrating more and more and more. So you just want
to protect yourself, protect your heart, everything we allow
in is going to get reproduced. Okay. What are you currently
planting in your heart? Like, are you, you know, spending time
in the Word? Are you seeking God for the truth of who he says you
are? Are you meditating on scriptures that if you struggle
with insecurity or identity, you know, kind of issues and
struggles, you know, are you studying the truth and not just
studying it to get it up here, but to get it down in here. And
that's when the healing kind of when the healing happens, you
all, that's what helps us that that space between our head and
our heart, that's what closes that space, the healing. So we
have to get to the root of the matter. So that that place can
get healed. And then the other places along the way the Lord
shows us, and that's going to what's going to help us shift
into that whole person, if you will, little by little by
little. But what are you putting into your heart? What
are you planting in there? And then what type of fruit are you
producing? What's coming out? So remember, for those of you that
have struggled with anger or feel a lot of anger, often,
anger is hurts bodyguard. So really, what's going on, the
emotion that needs dealt with isn't just anger. It's not about
being good. It's not about behavior modification. This is
about heart transformation. So underneath the anger, what pain
are you feeling? Where are you sad? Where are you frustrated
and hurt? And then you want to ask God to tend to those areas
and really be honest with yourself so that you can heal
and move forward. This is from the hard workbook. It says God's
standard of good when God uses the word good. He isn't talking
about our human standard of good. He is referring to his
standard of good. So maybe you do have a little something
working out in your life, but is it God's version of good yet?
There's an upgrade available to every area of our lives if we
are willing to be shown what we can't see yet. Think about that.
Every day I encourage you all Lord show me what I can't see so
that I can heal. You know, Jackie in the in the book, it
also has a description. I'll see if I can find it later. But it's
about taking our feet off of the pathways of pain and asking God
to put our feet on the pathways that lead back to him. So ladies
that we would you know, because again, if we can't see something
like those memories that I told you about that boy trying to
lock me in that room. That was literally not on my radar for so
many years. But when I went through the heart work and that
stuff bubble to the surface, and I didn't just push it back down
like it didn't happen, but I addressed it and allowed God to
heal even that area. I started to gain momentum, and I got
upgrades and breakthrough supernatural things. And so I
want to encourage you, if memories come up, if emotions
come up, if feelings come up that you allow yourself to feel
the fields so that God can heal the fields. But I am going to
encourage you to ask God to help you be in balance as well,
because we don't want our feelings to drive the car. Okay,
we want to be aware of what we're feeling so that we can
heal and look at what are those feelings and emotions connected
to what lies are we still believing so we can be set free.
All right, our problem areas are the places we have the most
unhealed wounds. So I want you to be thinking about like what
areas
Are you really struggling the most in your life right now?
And those areas are a signal to you that that is places you have unhealed wounds.
So if you struggle with your finances over and over and over again, you never have enough.
And even if you get a raise, like it still just ends up not satisfying.
And you like, I don't know if you all have ever felt like this, but I can
remember at one point in my life feeling like, man, I feel like I have holes in my
pockets because even when I would get increased, it felt like something would
happen and just take the money away, you know, well, there's something connected to
that.
It wasn't just that the enemy was always attacking me.
I needed to learn how to not only had knowledge, be a better steward, but I needed
healing in my heart to look at like, not only finances differently, but God, the
father differently.
And when I started viewing him differently, viewing myself as his daughter, as his
beloved, a couple of weeks ago, I talked to you all about being a princess, you know,
thinking about like, okay, that's our inheritance.
Like, what does it mean to be a princess of the King of Kings?
Well, everything that's his is ours.
That's our inheritance.
Everything that's in the kingdom of heaven is our inheritance.
Everything, everything good you could ever think of or imagine, and this isn't slot
machine.
That's not what I'm talking about.
I'm literally talking about, man, just even sitting in the goodness of God, you all
when something's going really amazing and you just bask in the goodness.
Yeah, financial blessings and all those things are amazing, but having the love,
like true understanding of God's absolute love and adoration for you.
And you, you, you sit in that revelation, allow that to transform you from the inside
out.
Like you really start to believe it.
It's not just something you read on the Bible page and people tell you, but you
actually are like, oh my gosh, like he really loves me.
Like he's not forsaken me.
He's not just blessing everybody else and passing me over.
He's not just trying to transform me.
He wants to lead me beside still waters.
He wants to refresh my soul.
I feel the Holy Spirit on this.
That's why I'm doing this.
He wants good things for you, but it's up to us to shift and heal in our hearts so
that we can receive that truth.
So where do you need to shift tonight so that you can receive that truth?
So where do you need to shift tonight so that you can receive the truth that the
father is good?
He didn't want any of us to go through the painful, harmful things that we did.
And even some of you now, you know, you're going through health struggles or, you
know, somebody's betrayed you or a friend left your life.
And, and God is saying, I care, I care about it all.
And I want to come in and I want to comfort you and I want to help you.
Will you take me by the hand?
So we're going to do that tonight.
We're going to take him by the hand.
Counterfeit lives that we live into ladies.
Those are the things again, that we want all that stuff.
It's not something we're trying to figure out or, you know, get our shovels out and
dig, dig, dig.
Nope.
Holy spirit, Lord, we're turning to him and we're asking him really good questions
all the time.
Your questions on a regular basis should be Lord.
This is what I'm going through today.
You get offended, man.
I feel offended.
I feel angry.
Lord, why am I feeling this way today?
Can you help me to see what I can't see?
What's the greater truth?
What's the revelation?
What's the revealing for healing that you have for me?
Proverbs 23, seven says this, and this isn't in the amplified version for as a
person thinks in his heart, so is he.
As a person thinks in his heart, so is he.
So how's your heart doing?
Is your heart believing that God has good things for you, that you are a bride
already?
Not just like, Oh yeah, I want to get married.
No ladies.
There's a difference.
Do you believe in your core that you are a bride and that God has a good spirit
mate for you and that you can move every day a little bit closer to him and that
you all can be brought together.
It's not a one find a needle in the haystack.
That's not what we're talking about, but that God has someone really awesome that
he wants to encounter you in your life.
All right. We're going to go
into the breakout rooms here in a minute.
I want you-all to be thinking about one other thing
as we start to prepare to do that.
Have you ever heard of squatters?
They're the people that come and they take up
residence in someone else's house or a building,
whether it's abandoned or not,
and they live there like it's their home.
They take it over sometimes.
Even to the point that in
some cities where it gets really cold in the winter,
if those people return to their home
and find someone squatting in their home,
that there's actual laws to protect those people
that are squatting in the home.
They can't kick them out
because it's cold and it's winter.
Think about that for a minute.
The reason I'm bringing this up is we consider
in this community lies that we believe
as a result of trauma, squatters.
They're taking up residence in your heart
and they don't belong there.
So it's time to evict them.
It's time to kick them out.
And tonight we're going to start doing that, okay?
But it begins with identifying emotions.
I just realized I forgot,
if any of you were on this afternoon,
I forgot to issue the activation.
So I'll definitely be putting that up in the group,
but I will let you all know here tonight
before we hop off what that is.
As you go into breakout,
this is what your question is tonight.
What is a negative emotion or memory
that God is bringing up in your spirit tonight
for revealing for healing?
I'll repeat that.
What is a negative emotion or memory
that God is bringing up in your spirit tonight
for revealing for healing?
Again, you don't have to remember
or know how to piece it all together right now.
You just want to identify the emotion
or the memory that's coming up for you, okay?
Karishma, that's totally fine.
If you all can't go,
if anyone's working
or you're just not able to go and break out,
you can stay in the main room.
I'll be praying while the ladies are in breakout.
So sometimes you never know what's gonna come out of me
when I'm praying.
So sometimes there's prophetic things I hear.
I just lean into the Lord and I pray.
So we'll be covering you all while you're in breakouts.
If you've never been in a breakout room before,
there's gonna be something
that's gonna pop up on your screen.
And you're just gonna click to join that.
For anyone that gets into a room,
if you're there by yourself,
just hang out there for a minute.
I'll move you around, okay?
I don't want you to worry
because I have a couple of people saying they can't go in
and I'm just automatically assigning.
So I'll move you around.
I'll get you situated, okay?
Go ahead and click to join those.
Here they are for you.
Okay, once I get them situated, I'll start praying here.
Yeah, I see you, Joanne.
I'm gonna get you here in just one second.
I was having a hard time clicking on your name
because everybody's things were moving around.
All right, there you go.
Okay, I see you, Joanne.
I'm gonna get you here in just one second.
I was having a hard time clicking on your name
because everybody's things were moving around.
All right, there you go.
Okay.
Trying to find, okay, nobody's there.
So all you ladies can't go into breakout
that are here in the main room?
That's a lot of people.
All right, Father, we just thank you so much for this night.
We thank you, God, for everything
that you're doing in our hearts.
God, we thank you for the ladies that are in breakouts,
those that are here in the room,
those that are gonna watch the replay.
We thank you for the revealings
for healing that are happening.
God, we thank you for revelation and insight
that you're showing us things that we can't see
so that we can step further into revelation
and healing, enlightenment.
Have another joy, she's already in a room.
Sorry, y'all.
Sorry.
That's okay, I was just trying to figure out
where you were at.
I see you, I see you there,
but you were in a room with someone.
Did you all get kicked out of your room?
Yeah, she moved out and then only me left.
Okay, all right, let me just put you in another room, okay?
Okay.
There you go.
So Father, we just thank you for just continuing
to build sisterhood, friendships, and connections
through these breakout sessions,
Laura, that you would give the.
ladies, just peace that passes understanding as they are sharing God, that they would recognize
your presence. God, we thank you for just illuminating areas that they need to talk
about. We thank you for healing, for redemption, for reconciliation. We thank you for release of
forgiveness, a release of, yeah, Lord, even times where they have received shame or guilt or
condemnation because of things they've been through or choices they've made that haven't
led to good areas. We thank you for coming in and just setting them free from the yoke of shame and
the bondage of sin. We thank you, Lord, for, yeah, Lord, the balm of Galia just being placed on these
areas. We thank you, God, for revelation truth. We thank you that you're always,
you're always working everything together for good to save many people alive. We thank you,
Lord, for Romans 8, 17, it says, and since we are his true children, we qualify to share
all his treasures for indeed we are heirs of God himself. And since we are joined to Christ,
we also inherit all that he is and all that he has. We will experience being co-glorified with
him, provided that we accept his sufferings as our own. And so, Lord, we just thank you for
the reminder that we are co-heirs with Christ. I pray that you would help us to receive an
upgrade in the revelation and understanding of who we are as a princess, as beloved daughters
of the king. Hi, Brenda. We're talking in the rooms right now about what is a negative emotion
or memory that God is bringing up in your spirit tonight for revealing, for healing.
I'm going to go ahead and put you into a room with some of the other ladies.
Let me just make sure here, do room three. Thanks. Oh, you're welcome. There you go.
And Lord, we just thank you for, just even this morning I was reading, or yesterday,
I can't remember, in Psalms, and it was talking about how even God would create there to be peace
with our enemies when we live for him, when we choose to live according to his purposes
and lean into his goodness, his life. So, Lord, we just declare that you will
cause our enemies to make good with us. God, that they won't be able to do anything but help bless
us. And we just thank you, God, that you prepare a table for us in the presence of our enemies.
And ladies, I want you to understand that it's not just people. We're talking about the opposing
forces are going to be made to turn around and bless us. God's going to be like, hey, I'm going
to bless my girls. I'm going to love on them. And I'm going to prepare a table for them in the
presence of their enemies. And that we can stand in that goodness and experience the goodness of
God in the land of the living. John 1, 12 says that those who embraced him and took hold of his
name were given authority to become the children of God. Lord, we thank you that you would help
each one of us to really stand in that authority that you've given us. Not only just that reminder
as the scripture says that we are the children of God, but that the word there to become the
children of God. We already are the children of God, but so many times people don't receive the
revelation of what it means to be a child of the King, the Father, which I've already been talking
about tonight. And y'all, I'm just flipping through the heartwork book here right now. And that was
kind of timely that I landed on that one. So I want to encourage you all to keep leaning into
that this week. What does it mean to be a child of the King? Ephesians 4, 26 through 27 says this,
but don't let the passion of your emotions lead you to sin. Don't let anger control you or be
fuel for revenge. Not even for a day. Don't give the slanderous accuser, the devil, an opportunity
to manipulate you. Lord, I thank you that we, yes, Lord, even as Jackie taught on Saturday,
that we can grow in the gift of discernment, that we can discern between, you know,
what is of God, what is of a spirit that's opposing us, that we would know, yeah, that we would know
your truth more and more and more, that you would stir up a hunger and thirst for us or for your
righteousness, for your word in us, God, that you would fan the flames of the hunger to read your
word, to grow in relationship with you, that we would never be satisfied apart from you, away from
you, God, that you are the vine. We are the branches apart from you. We can't do anything.
So, Lord, I thank you that you'll help us daily to connect to you, the vine,
to grow in relationship with you and to ask you for revelation and insight, even before we read
the word of God, before we read the heart workbook, before we watch the videos, that God, we would ask
you to illuminate, you know, and quicken these things in our spirit and even that we would arise,
arise, oh sleeper, and awake, awake, oh sleeper, and rise up from the dead.
So, Lord, we just say awaken to all of our spirits that we
would be women of God that are marked by living fully alive,
unhindered, unafraid, completely whole,
lacking no good thing.
God, that you're making us whole physically,
mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and financially,
and we lack no good thing.
God, that everywhere we go,
that we would have favor for everything
that we would put our hand to.
And we just thank you, God, for,
yeah, the truth of Genesis 50, 20.
You intended, this is Joseph.
This is after the whole Joseph story, ladies.
It says, you intended to harm me.
He's talking to his brothers,
but God intended it all for good.
He brought me to this position
so I could save the lives of many people.
So Lord, we thank you that you,
when we surrender our pain to you,
when we surrender the abuse and the mistreatment,
all these things that happen to us,
when we surrender those things to you, God,
that you turn our pain into purpose,
God, that you can turn it all around for good,
not only for our benefit,
but for the benefit of many other people.
So Lord, we thank you for healing minds, healing hearts,
God, that you are transforming us
by the renewing of our minds
that all old things have passed away.
Behold, everything has become new in you.
God, we thank you that, yes, Lord,
that we can perceive that you're doing a new thing,
that you are bringing rivers in the desert
and streams in the wastelands, God,
and you're literally coming.
It makes me think of the Lion King movie
after Simba got back on the throne, if you will,
and then all the water starts,
this is the old Lion King, I don't know about the new one,
all the water kind of starts to flow
through the dead, scar-led land,
and everything starts to come back to life.
And so I just believe and speak that over all of you,
that that's kind of like some of you,
it's just felt really dry, it's felt dead, it's felt barren,
but God is the God of life, he's the God of fulfillment,
he's the God of hope, and he's coming,
and he's bringing in the living waters,
and he's washing over all these areas,
and he's bringing things back to life in Jesus' name, amen.
Welcome back, so glad that you're here.
I'm gonna have to have y'all, yeah, thank you,
have y'all mute.
All right, so who is willing to share with the whole group
what you shared in your breakout?
And then we're gonna do group coaching.
If you shared this afternoon,
I'm gonna encourage you to wait
because I want some new ladies to share.
All right, Ruth, go ahead.
Hi.
Hi, sorry, I actually missed the,
I missed the breakout just because of I was getting,
but this is, I'm gonna make this very quick
because I want other ladies to get to share,
but it's just a request for a prayer again.
I shared previously about when my dad
was in the emergency room because he had the brain bleed.
Yeah, he's actually back in the emergency room again.
He was supposed to see the neurosurgeon tomorrow morning
for a routine, like a follow-up.
And so they had a brain CT scan today
just as a requirements for that.
And it showed that everything was worse,
like the bleeding was worse and the shift,
meaning that the bleeding of the right side
that's shifted is shifting his brain
to the left side is worse.
It was a four and then it was a six a couple of days ago.
Now it's a 10.
Okay, we'll pause and just pray for him.
What's your dad's name again, Ruth?
His name is Vincent.
Vincent.
Father, you see everything that's going on with Vincent.
God, we just ask you to come to his aid.
We ask you to dispatch healing angels
to minister to him in every area.
God, we're asking for you to reduce that brain bleed number
that God, you would just go to the source
of the brain bleed and that you would stop it up.
God, that you would just literally just cause those extra,
the blood things, the cells, all the things,
whatever's going on there.
God, I'm just hearing the word dissipate.
So we just ask you to cause that to dissipate,
that the doctors would be able to get it back into order.
And we thank you for healing.
We thank you for, yes, Lord.
We thank you for Vincent, your son, he's your son.
We thank you for ministering to him right now
for him and his family.
God, we speak peace over his body.
We speak peace over his brain.
We speak wholeness and healing
that it would no longer be shifted out of balance.
God, we just thank you that you bring balance to all things
and we speak to his brain and we declare
that it will be made completely whole,
lacking no good thing.
And we thank you for it in advance.
God, we thank you for Ruth.
God, we thank you that your love would just surround her
in a supernatural way.
In Jesus name, amen.
We're gonna keep praying for you and believing.
You're welcome for healing.
Please keep me posted on that, Ruth, okay?
All right, ladies, who is willing to share
with the whole group what you shared on breakout?
Oh, I see, hands are up, yay.
Preeti, go ahead.
Hello again.
Hi.
Okay, so.
I want to give so firstly praying for Ruth, it's really hard to go after that. So just
want to acknowledge that. I want to just shout out to my sister with whom I was in breakout
room because something she shared triggered a whole bunch of emotions that I did not know
I had. But we were talking about friendships, like just platonic friendships, mostly, mostly
with girlfriends, but with everyone else. And so we were talking about how we both have
been disappointed with our friends. My dad was in the military. And so like, I moved
every two, three years. And so I was the one, you know, like, and I'm normally wired to
take that first step to keep in touch. And so, you know, like, I really do try so like,
because, you know, out of sight is not out of mind for me, like, you know, I do try.
And so like, I think in the last two years, there have been really long stretches of periods
where it felt like suddenly, like people have forgotten me and not respond, like normally
people are very responsive, and I need prayer. Like I have prayers coming from all over the
world that sisters praying for me when I need it, or like, you know, just sharing life and
learning from each other. But like, I think I've gone through frequent periods of times
where it felt like I was walking alone, like without people. I mean, of course, there's
the Holy Spirit. And of course, like, you know, God never leaves you. But ultimately,
like as an extrovert, like, it has been hard. And so like, I was just kind of debriefing
with my sister in the group that, like how sometimes some friends are givers, and some
friends are takers. And I believe that I've been a giver in most of my friendships. But
like, it's been hard. And so like, yeah, I think like that feeling of rejection, like
even in friendships, like, have come up. And so like, I know people get busy, you know,
like life happens.
So I'm gonna I'm gonna have you pause for a minute. I'm gonna do something. So you're
doing a great job identifying, you know, how you feel the situations that happened. But
ladies, so often what happens is we, and I'm not saying it's not true, people are busy,
okay. But the reality is this, oh, we don't have to do I lost sound.
Do you hear me? Oh, say that again.
Can you hear me?
I can hear you now. But I lost you for 10 seconds.
Um, so one of the things that we often do is we feel guilt for saying something that we
actually feel. And so then we'll try to say something like, Oh, I know, it's just because
they're busy. And because we have empathy, we do have compassion. And that's not a bad
thing. But what can happen is when we do that, we're saying what we feel. But then we kind
of flip side kind of dismiss it. Does that make sense? Even though we're not trying to
dismiss what we're feeling? Like, a lot of times I'll see this show up even when people
are sharing about something that they went through. But they don't want anyone to think
their family are bad people. And so they automatically are like, but you know, my they
love me, I know that. And those things are very true. But we don't have to do that. Okay,
so we can just stand in our truth. Like, hey, this is how I felt when this situation
happened. And then okay, what are the lies I'm believing as a result of it doesn't mean
those people are bad people. It just means that's where you know, we're at in that
situation. And so we need to really continue to ask the Lord for revealings for healing,
you said a couple things there, people have forgotten me, and rejection, those are two
different, you know, kind of lie categories. And so my question for you would be pretty.
When is the first time that you felt forgotten? And that you would identify that with the
Lord with his help, and then lean into that for more revealings for healing and see, you
know, what other trauma stories or memories or lies are linked to that. And then the rejection
as well. So when is the first time you felt rejected by a friend specifically, because
that's what's coming up. And you might find other things, people that you felt that rejection
through that will come up. But let's start with the friend. And let's process that and
see what else might come up, especially since you said that, as you all were talking in
the breakout, there's emotions, there's things coming up, as you're processing that. And
so look forward to hearing where the Lord will lead you in that. Also, just, you know,
most people that have had to move around with military parents, automatically, like, it
just is a trend that I see in heart healing. They have a tough time really,
establishing roots and things like that.
And then when they do, they have to move again.
And so there's just, it's a lot of struggle,
or even if maybe your parents weren't in the military,
but your parents just moved around a lot.
Some people go through that, very similar things.
So then we put up walls
and even when we try to pursue people,
we still have in the back of our minds,
typically that first rejection
or that first time that we felt like someone forgot us.
And so we don't even still fully show up
in those relationships or flip side of that,
we attract friendships that aren't fully committed to us.
Same kind of thing with spirit mate.
I don't know about you all,
but I was good at attracting men
that were not able to commit.
And then when they did commit,
they were super controlling and manipulative and abusive.
And so none of that was good, okay?
So we wanna attract friends and the romantic spirit mate,
people that are committed, they're mature,
they're healthy, that they reciprocate.
So it's not just one person giving and giving
and giving and pursuing.
No, it should be a mutual pursuit.
And yes, life gets busy you all, but you know what?
We make time for things that we wanna make time for,
don't we?
Yep, we do.
And that's the hard thing is that we actually,
it's hard for us to look at like friendships change,
seasons change.
They might've been a great friend in the last season,
but in this new season,
they may not be able to be that friend to you.
And so maybe God wants to bring a new friend into your life
that can be that friend that's reciprocal
where you're both giving and taking, okay?
All right, Candy, go ahead.
Yeah, actually my situation is very similar,
little similar.
Let me see, can you?
Yep, I see you.
Okay, yeah, it's very similar.
Like basically my issue is,
I was divorced in year 2020,
and then most of my friends,
they're not as active as I was.
So I tried to make new friends
after the divorce trying to make new friends.
But most of the friends that I made for some reason
can only make it at the acquaintance level,
not able to move it to the friends level.
And I always have that feeling that they,
sometimes they talk behind my back,
or they make things up,
or they would, if I make a joke,
they would just think that joke is,
they make that joke like a serious matter,
and then talk about behind my back and stuff like that.
So I feel like, I don't know,
I feel like I always have that feeling
that I'm not able to make friends to the next level,
to become friend, just like acquaintance.
Yeah.
Tell me about the relationship with your mom.
What was that like?
Were you all really close,
or did you feel like you could never get
to a deeper level with your mom emotionally?
No, we are not close at all.
Yeah, my mom, she's more,
yeah, my mom, she's not educated,
so she's not, yeah, her life is just to,
I think the reason she have kids,
I have two brothers and one sister,
and the reason she have kid is to make sure
that the kid can make enough money to support the family.
That's the reason she have kids, that kind of thing.
Yeah, we don't have such a good relationship.
We don't really talk to each other that much.
Yeah, except only when it's necessary.
Okay, so a couple things,
and I felt like the Lord,
like immediately as you were talking,
I thought of your mom,
because ladies, here's the thing.
If we learn that relationships are only surface level
with our parents, most likely we're gonna believe that
in every other relationship that we show up in.
Even if those people are trying to grow deeper
in relationship, we don't see them that way.
We may struggle to even interact,
and even when we want to go deeper,
we might even send body language subconsciously
to them that we're not there.
Now, the flip side of that is that you can also, again,
attract people that can't go there
because healing needs to happen
with your relationship with your mom.
Forgiveness needs to happen.
Sometimes what we can do,
I don't know if you all ever have done this,
but there were times that when I was younger,
I didn't know what I know now,
and I judged my mom a lot.
I criticized her for the ways that she did things,
and some of it was warranted, okay?
My mom had a lot of manipulations.
little tendencies. She actually operated in a lot of narcissistic tendencies and things,
had a lot of depression, was really kind of MIA for a huge part of when I was growing
up in the sense that she was working all the time. And when she was home, she just was
not available. And so I had to look at the fact that not only that happened with my mom,
but my dad literally left when I was born, like he just left and he came back on and
off, but he was never really there. And so I had both bio parents that I really could
never have a deep relationship with. Okay. They were uncommitted in a sense. And so that
then caused me to attract friends. Y'all literally I've had to shed friends. I have tracked,
I've attracted so many friends that operated in a narcissistic tendencies, same things
that I grew up with people that were not committed. I've had a lot of great friends too, but I've
had to really ask for wisdom and discernment to, um, know whether or not to interact with
someone in a deeper level. Can I trust them Lord with my heart? Okay. Um, and so when
I encourage you to really take some time this week and pray, uh, even if you already have
done a lot of healing with your mom, cause I know you've been, you know, doing the work
for a few weeks, Candy, you've been doing great. Um, I want to encourage you specifically
to ask the Lord if you have been criticizing your mom for the way that she was and if there's
things that you need to actually like forgive her for regarding her inability to connect
on a deeper level. Okay. She also has a tenant. I mean, she's, um, she's a very traditional
person. My mom, she's favored the sons more than the daughters. So yeah, that is that,
that, and then she said a lot of things that, that kind of hurts me because of, because
of her favoring to son to son. So she kind of like, she even said that, you know, my,
my, my daughter is not her, it's not her grandkid. It's only, she only recognized the son side
of the grandkid, you know? I mean, that's huge. And, and ladies, let me say this too.
It doesn't mean that when you forgive someone that you're saying what they're doing is okay.
I want you to remember that forgiveness is obedience. We're forgiving because Christ
forgave us. Okay. We're choosing to forgive so that we're not bound to those people literally
in those situations. And so, um, it doesn't mean you have to go back into close relationship
and try to make something happen that may not be able to happen. Now you can love on
those people and sow seeds as you go. But, uh, I'm really sorry to hear that that happened.
I'm sorry to hear that that's how your, your child's been treated. Um, but you forgiving
is going to be a game changer for you. I really believe that that can shift, um, the way that
you experience relationships in every area in the future. Um, but also be open to any
areas where the Lord might reveal to you where people have tried to connect with you on a
deeper level, but maybe, you know, intellectual people sometimes don't recognize social cues.
Hey, not saying that's true about you, but I'm just kind of putting that out there for
everybody that's on here. So, um, sometimes like the reason I, one of the reasons God
put me with my husband, he's very, very smart, man. I remember that was one of the things
when I was dating him, I was like, you know, I even said it to him, like, like he has,
you know, doctorate degree and like, he's just really smart biblically and in a lot
of other ways too. Um, and I'm smart too, but I'm just smart in different ways. And
so, um, there are times that God will show me sides of things that he hasn't even seen
or thought of. And then the vice versa, he sees things in ways that I might not have
thought of it or seen it, whether it's in scripture with people or situations. And so,
but that came and I'm able to receive that from him and vice versa, because we both healed
and then we are in a position to receive it from each other. Does that make sense? Everyone?
All right. All right. I'm going to keep going so we can get more people. Candy, thank you
so much for coming. Yeah. Jovita, go ahead.
Hi. I guess what, um, yeah, some of the negative emotions that came up for me were, um, just
feeling hopeless, uh, been feeling abandoned. I feel like some of the lies are that, you
know, God, um, isn't going to come through in this area or he doesn't care enough. Um,
and um, yeah, growing up, I guess like a lot of, um, physical sexual abuse was directed
at me. A lot of anger was directed at me. So I, I think I've realized now that I'm scared
of men too.
and I've kept myself away from them.
I've been single for a long time,
mainly because I was choosing wrong.
And so I kind of pulled away from dating at all.
I'm trying my best to get out there, but I feel like
I mean, this has been great.
A lot of intense emotions have been coming up, too.
So I I'm wondering also that, you know,
I guess the lie also is that with these emotions,
are you just going to keep feeding them or is it going to keep
getting better? Are you going to heal at some point?
Yeah, that's where I'm at.
Yeah. And I will say you are.
You are. I literally if you ever wonder, just not in a weird way,
but like just look at me, OK, just look at me and say, OK,
she's gone through a lot and she's healed and she's, you know,
like look at people that are further doesn't have to just be me
like that are further along than where you are.
And let that be something to give you hope and encourage you.
Because if God did it for me, he can do it for you.
He can do it for any of you.
And so I want to encourage you in that.
The other thing, tell me about the abandonment.
So when when is the first time you remember feeling abandoned, Jovita?
I think it goes back to my my dad, because he was not very
he was a very angry person.
So a lot of anger came from him.
And just he was not around for a long time of, you know,
when I was in my teenage years and stuff.
And so I think it's.
Yeah. And so there's been some memories where
some things have happened and I felt very alone and lonely.
And I just and then I became this very, very independent person
that felt like I had to do everything on my own.
I'm also the oldest. So I just yeah, I feel like maybe that's
where the abandonment comes from.
OK, so this week, this is what I want you to do.
I want you to actually kind of sit in the memory of being a teenager
and him not being there. OK.
And it's going to hurt probably as you do.
OK, I just want to warn you, don't be afraid of it, though.
This is ladies. This is why it's so important.
What we don't face can't heal. OK.
You're not going to be here forever, I promise.
You're going to you're going to move through this.
But I feel like that teenage time is important.
And what I mean by sit in that, I want you to remember,
kind of ask the Lord to, you know, reveal an actual situation
when you were a teen, OK, like specific things that happened
during that time when he wasn't around.
What were you battling with?
And ask the Lord, what are the lies I received as a result of this?
OK, and write those down.
And then remember lies we want to have replaced with truth.
So, Lord, what's the truth to replace this lie?
And as you're sitting in that,
we don't want to just feel all the pain, we actually also want to feel
the peace and the presence of the Lord in those places.
And so I want to encourage you to literally ask Jesus, OK,
specifically ask Jesus where he was at when you were in that time.
Where was he?
Ask him to show you where he was and what does he want you to know about it?
OK, and let's just see what he shows you,
and I would love for you to come into the group and there's no rush.
Just whenever you, you know, process that and you're ready,
come into the group and share that with us.
And then if there's anything else that, you know,
maybe needs to be helped unpacked, we can do that.
It sounds like abuse and stuff came up tonight for you,
that those things resonated for you being afraid of men.
So give yourself a lot of grace, OK, during this time.
Give yourself permission to process however long it takes you.
You know, ladies, this is where it's really important.
The the hard work process is five weeks, OK?
We don't want people flying through it, OK?
So if anybody comes and you try to finish in a few days, we're going to say,
hey, you really need to finish this.
You need to take time.
But one of the things I want to say, and not that you'll be here
more than five weeks, but I just want you to know and hear
or anyone else that is in this kind of situation,
when you have things that are pretty big that come up during hard work.
I just want to encourage you to give yourself the space and grace to process it.
So if it takes you longer than five weeks, it's OK. OK.
All right. I just want to make sure everyone knows that.
Super important.
Thank you for sharing with us tonight and trusting us with your story.
Appreciate you. Thank you so much.
Lenina, did I say it right?
I was. I think that's right. Right.
Yeah. Awesome. Right.
So I didn't get a breakout room, so I didn't get to share.
So I felt like I needed to, I think.
Like, yeah, I wonder, were you in the main room with me?
Yeah, I wasn't. I went to a four and.
It popped up. It popped up in nobody. Did nobody come in the room? Is that what you're saying?
Yeah. So sorry about that.
It's okay. I knew that that was a lie of the enemy, trying to single me out and say that
it wasn't important what I had to say. So I'm saying it now.
Right. Let's hear it.
Um, so I've been, quite frankly,
feeling fear. And I realized, I think I'm, I'm digging a little deeper.
Because I am afraid of being fooled. I was in a 20 year marriage where I was fooled.
And I was fooled and betrayed in the worst way and my sister was involved.
Um, and she reached out to me just just today of all days and asked if I was going to her
daughter's graduation party. And I feel stuck. Because I'm have this place of fear because I
don't want to be hurt by her. I just I'm scared of being hurt by her. I feel like I have let go
anger and bitterness and, and I have to let that go to move on. But I don't want to open myself up
to the possibility of being hurt. Because although she hurt me and admits it, for a long time,
she blamed me. She said it was my fault that she slept with my husband, basically.
So if I go to this event in two weeks, I'll see her. And I don't know that she will respect my
boundaries and just be cordial and not drag our family and my son's in a scene like I don't know
if I can trust that. And so I'm fearful. Let me ask you a couple questions. And we are going to
process the fear out too. But um, are your sister and your ex together? No. Okay, not that that
makes it any better. But I just want to know what's kind of the dynamic that you're going into
looks like? Have you and your sister ever gone through counseling together? No. Okay. All right.
Is this the first time you would see her since this happened? Yes. Okay, probably not the best
idea for you. Yeah. Here's why ladies. I'm all for reconciliation. I'm all for you know, of course,
your niece not feeling like you don't love her any of those kind of things. But here's the reality.
You matter. Okay, you matter. And you and your sister haven't even seen each other in person.
And then you're going to come to an event that's supposed to be about the daughter.
What's going to happen potentially is all kinds of triggers. So if you all were going to see each
other beforehand, and have time to process that a little bit more, I'd say maybe Yeah. But because
that's not at least as of right now happening, you coming and being there the first time ever,
after all of that, that's a whole lot of stuff. That's a whole lot of stuff. And that's just to me,
breeding ground for the enemy to come right in and steal that that young lady's day,
as well as create more hurt for you potentially. And so I would I would let your sister know like,
Hey, you know, we haven't even we haven't even connected since this all happened. And I think
that that would be a first step before I just show up at family functions. Yeah. And that's a
healthy boundary. There's nothing wrong with that. So I'm on the afraid of being fooled.
I think here, let me let me say this to your sister was blaming you. And even though I'm hoping
you don't believe her. And the fact that you're afraid of being fooled tells me that somewhere
deep down you have blamed yourself. And that you don't trust yourself now. And so we need to ask
the Lord to come into those places and heal those areas. So that you can start to trust yourself
because you know, I've been there not the same. It wasn't my sister. But I mean, sometimes you just
you can't see what you can't see. Okay. And so we don't want to punish ourselves and partner with
the lies that God, you know, won't protect us or that he won't reveal things. Again,
sometimes we see the signs, ladies, we do, but we don't want to believe them.
I saw signs when my, my ex husband was cheating on me. He wasn't coming home at night. Sometimes
where was he? You know, no clue, no clue where it was, you know, with the girl,
my spiritual daughter's dad and the things he was doing, everything had to be on lockdown.
never no truck like everything was his stuff his private you can't come into total red flag okay
so we have to really ask ourselves at what point and this is lenina for you or anyone else that's
gone through these things when is the first time lord you were trying to help me see something
that i i just didn't i couldn't see i didn't want to see but you were trying to help me
so that you can start to see those times where you denied your own your own truth if you will
okay um that's what i had to do it helped me a lot to um really recognize man i i did i did see
i did notice things and you know sometimes he would even say things and he would try to confuse
me and try to make me think i wasn't really seeing what i was seeing there's that side
of it too ladies how often that happens but man when we can recognize you know what i did see
and not in a mean way like oh you know towards them but just in ourselves like i can trust
myself god i can trust you to show me things just again this gift of discernment jackie just
talked about we can grow in the gift of discernment and trust that what god is showing us is to
protect us okay so lenina i encourage you to kind of start there and let's see what the lord wants
to show you regarding like when you started losing that trust in your own self um and um
be asking the lord if there is any even though it wasn't your fault like when your sister said
those things deep down in your core did any of that did you partner with any of that that it's
your fault and and and how can you come out of agreement with those things this week okay
thank you for sharing ladies man we all man people have been through hard stuff right
so proud of you all for sharing sarah go ahead
hey bethany hi so yesterday this memory came up randomly i was thinking about how there's been
several times in our community group where you or one of the other leaders would say like you're a
finisher to different people and i was thinking like why do i resonate with that so deeply
and this memory popped up where i was in the middle of a piano recital
and i by that time i hated piano lessons and i had not practiced as much as i knew i should have
so in this middle of this recital in this church service you know people are all looking at you
i forget the piece and i freeze and i run out of the church auditorium and i've always said it as
like a really cute story of me being you know i was probably third grade so i was in the middle
so nine um but yesterday when that memory came up i felt no humor about it whatsoever
and i think it might be one of the first times where i saw myself not finish something
and then i can see different things throughout my life since then where i haven't finished something
and so some of the lies i have started to stick with that okay this is huge sarah yes huge
revelation i think the lord is highlighting that to you and so in that memory i want you
to actually ask the lord to reveal to you how you really felt that day yeah and uh
what lies came up as a kid that you i mean again ladies remember as kids we can't process this kind
of stuff we just our brains aren't even developed enough to process emotional trauma and those kind
of things um also i'm just hearing the lord ask him if there's any other times where maybe even
even if it wasn't similar where the feelings that you had that day when you got embarrassed most
likely i'm not saying that's for sure but probably i i have a feeling there was another time of
embarrassment before that and i don't i mean i don't know your story but i feel like there's
something else there okay i feel the holy spirit on that so the lord will reveal any other connectors
there where you felt embarrassed like you had to hide or flee the room okay so ladies we're not
always man i feel the holy spirit on this a lot sarah it's not always you it's not always that
we run out of the room sometimes ladies we literally run away on the inside yes lord
Yeah. Yeah. I'm seeing this hit a couple people on the screen even here. So I feel like this is
going to help a lot of people. So asking the Lord to reveal the emotions you felt that day,
are there any other times that you felt those same kinds of things where you either ran away
physically or internally kind of ran away or shut down? And let's just see what else he connects.
And as you said, there were other things after that, where you realized that you didn't finish
something. And so coming out of agreement with like, that you're not a finisher, that you,
let me ask you, like even right now, what comes to mind about that day? Like you couldn't,
you forgot, you froze, you couldn't finish the piece. What are the lies that you were hearing?
I think definitely embarrassment, but also like, this is the consequence of you not trying hard
or like, you're not giving it your all. Like this is what happens
when you're not serious about something. Hey, did parents say that to you? That sounds very
grown up as a little kid. I think I would just, I think that was internalized.
But I also think some of it is, my sister is very musically talented and I struggle with that.
And so I think it also, there's something there too, of me like being like, this is the end of me
trying to match my sister and this gifting that she has.
Yeah. And even as you were starting to speak there, Sarah, about your sister,
there's definitely a connector there. Like you had some emotion kind of,
I felt like as you breathed, it kind of came out, which is good. And so let's not hide in sister's
shadow that you have to be like her. Let's just accept who you are. And that you, you know,
this is the consequence just keeps ringing in my spirit too. Like you're not being punished.
Yeah. You know, and God doesn't want you to keep punishing yourself.
Yeah. Ladies, do y'all know it's okay if we make mistakes?
Yeah. God's not up there like, ah, gotcha. No, here's your consequence. No, I mean, He does.
There are, there are consequences to our decisions, ladies, for sure. But God isn't like,
He does not want us to put ourselves in prison because of these mistakes. That's what I'm saying.
And not that it's always these big, big, massive prisons. But again, sometimes there are these
internal prisons where we just feel like a failure or yeah, I, I'm not a finisher or I'm not as good
as that person or, or whatever the lie is that we're believing, well, maybe you're great at other
things that she's not great at. And so maybe there might be that, that might be the thing before the
thing that I was, there might be something there that I was not good at, but I'm not good at.
There might be something there. It could be something different, but I definitely
heard the Lord say there's something before the recital. So let's just see what He unfolds for
you. Okay. That's okay. Thanks, Bethany. Yeah, you're welcome. Thanks for sharing. Joanne, go
ahead. Okay. So this is like a very recent thing, pattern. I feel like this lie that I can't have
what I want, especially in relationships with men. It's like, I meet lots of men, but I don't
end up finding the man that has the same alignment like is around my age. I'm almost 46, never married
and I still want kids. So it's like, there was always like one or two or three things. They're
not Christian or, you know, and then I start feeling very frustrated and very disappointed
and almost like, God, are you tricking me? This is so mean. Like, why do you bring these men? But
they're like not anybody I can choose. And so I know it's rooted in my childhood because my mom
has been bipolar since I've been seven. And it's like, we never really got our needs met. Or if it
was our needs, it was like in and out, in and out, right? So there's this overcoming of anxious
attachment for me. So I think there's, and there's a lot of like word lies and terrible things that
my mom have said over my, me as a woman and like in dating. So I think there's this sense of like
settling, you know, like settling and tolerating too much beyond what is like good for me. Because
I was very abused like emotionally and psychologically as a kid. So I have a
Tendency to like stay longer than I need to in friendships or relationships or even the beginning
So I think the the truth that I'm trying to
You know declare and start having faith for is like there are men in my around my age
We've never been married and what still want kids before I really see the evidence of it because you know
I see the fleshly evidence of my lie, but I'm like, I think this is working
I think the more I believe the more I'm gonna see that like this is possible and they do exist, you know
Sorry, I have a question for you
So give me an example of something your mom said over you
About being a woman or dating that was harmful. Can you give me an example?
Yeah, like for example she would like
Try to
Manipulate and set me up with men that I'm like, I don't want to be with that guy
Like he's not even Christian dude. Like why do you want me to like?
Consider a guy and like that. It's almost feels demeaning to me or like
Someone who's her uber driver and he's not really even a Christian too, you know, and I'm not attracted to you
I'm like, are you so desperate that you need me to be married so you can feel good about yourself
You know like you're okay mom, which you weren't so things like that
that's just one example, but there are like so many more where it's like
She would blame me if things in the relationship weren't working out with some guy
like just
Insert all these toxic thoughts like oh, maybe he's cheating on you. I'm like what?
Like just just things like that. Like it's very cultural to
like finding my value in my marriage ability like if I
If I have a man, you know, mm-hmm. It's like so it's something I've had a break for years
So, let me let me just kind of
So how has the forgiveness towards your mom gone? I
Think like I
Don't know. I mean, I do feel like I've intentionally forgiven her
But I can tell like when I talk about things what triggers me I'll be like, oh it's because my mom
It's because I'm very self-aware. So I could say oh, it's and I'm like wait, but I don't need to have this control me
I shouldn't have this affect me anymore, you know
Yeah, and and here's why I asked you that question before I said anything else
So
While you have probably forgiven her transactionally
Okay, which is still a good thing. You still have forgiven. You've still made that choice
um, I'm
Not sure that you've received compassion for her yet. Oh
Yeah, I think that's accurate I have some
Yeah
when you were described something that you said I could just hear and like
I'm just gonna call it what I heard bitterness
Okay, yeah
And and I'm not saying that because I think you're intentionally trying to be bitter or any of those kind of things
Anybody that would have gone through some of the things you've described to us. It would be hard. It would be really hard
But ladies, here's the thing
We we need to ask God to give us compassion for people doesn't mean we have to be okay with what they did or we
Have to be close to them
But are if we have bitterness in our heart and then we're walking around with that
It's showing up in every relationship. We're trying to be in we carry that baggage with us
and so you may be trying to connect with men and other friends and all this but
Internally if that bitter root is in there it stops the flow of the real you
from showing up
And so we really have to ask the Lord to help us
Heal from you know, even spirits in
Unforgiveness and bitterness and resentment towards people that have hurt us
Again, it doesn't and it doesn't excuse what they did ladies. We're not saying oh, it's just okay like no big deal
But what we are saying is hey my healing
Matters and I'm gonna forgive this person and I'm gonna choose to learn how to ask God to give me his heart for them
My mom did a lot of things not great
Growing up. My dad was literally like he just wasn't in my life
And even when he had an opportunity and he wasn't an alcoholic and drug addict anymore. He still never
Like never pursued relationship ever with me
And so I think it's really important for us to think about what we can do to help each other
It still blows my mind.
He's no longer with us today, but just, I still even, I can't even comprehend
the way that my parents were because I'm very, I'm just very different than them.
Like I love my kids and I, I like show up even when they don't want me to show up.
I show up and, and they want me to, but you know what I mean?
When they're teens or young adults, this life is different, but I can remember
the time the Lord showed me how my heart was full of pride because I
thought I was better than them.
You know?
And when you really like are willing to look at like, okay, what's really in my
heart, like, it's great that I'm a different parent than they were, but
like, when I feel like it makes me over them and I allow that pride and that
bitterness to get in there, it, it shifts the way I show up in all different areas.
And so I want to encourage you to really process that this week.
Uh, they're, uh, not now while you're in the heartwork, okay.
Heartwork should be your main focus ladies while you're in the heartwork.
I really, we don't want you all doing a ton of different
devotionals and reading the Bible.
Doing the heartwork to watch the heartwork videos.
But when you are finished with heartwork, there is a book called the
bait of Satan that I highly recommend.
For anyone that you struggle with a lot of offense or bitterness, it
will be a great book for you to read.
Okay.
Again, after you're done with the heartwork.
Okay.
Can y'all agree to that?
Um, but anyways, Joanne, I know it can be tough and I just want
you to know that we love you.
We're going to be praying for you.
Um, and just believing for God to continue to heal the broken areas and
harmful words that were spoken over you neglect that was experienced all of it.
Okay.
And we're cheering you on.
And so as you process this more, I want to encourage you to come into
the group this week and share.
If you have questions, if you feel anger, like just tell me any of it.
Like I'm here for all of it.
So you can tell me however you feel, um, you know, and just let us help
you unpack that more as you go.
Okay.
Yeah, I think, I think what I yeah, I'll go more deeper, but I was actually
wondering, do I have bitterness with dating?
Like I actually was like thinking about that this week.
So yeah, I know there's deeper stuff, not the anger, but there's hurt.
So there might even be bitterness towards God.
You know, a lot of people are like, you know, we don't realize that
we actually hold unforgiveness in our hearts towards God.
And he didn't do anything wrong, but we can still have unforgiveness towards him.
And so really looking at those things and continue to have those good
conversations, like you're talking about with the Lord and let's just see what
else he reveals for healing.
Okay.
Awesome.
I have one more lady.
I'm going to let Janie go.
Janie would love to hear what you have to say.
Oh, good evening.
Hi.
So, um, as you were processing with Jovita, um, you guys were talking about
abandonment and, you know, I wrote down, I said, does God really care that I'm
struggling in relationships after two failed marriages?
And then I started thinking about, cause I'm still, I'm just finishing part one.
And so I started thinking about prayer and forgiveness in
my relationship with my father.
And I think for a long time, I didn't blame him for a lot of stuff in my life
because I knew now that I'm older as a parent, I knew he did the best that he
could do at the time with the resources and things that he had.
And so backstory, he was building businesses.
When I started, when I was 13, I started working at his grocery
store and he had like eight grocery stores.
And so he was my first boss.
So I never really had the father daughter relationship.
And so when I got married, I never saw him.
He raised me because him and my mom divorced when I was like in kindergarten,
first grade, something like that.
I mean, he married, you married him a woman because he felt as though I need,
you know, me and my siblings needed a lady in our life.
Um, and so mom, just so I know my mom was bipolar.
She was mentally ill.
Okay.
And so at that time, back in the seventies, you know, we didn't know
anything about mental illness and we didn't know how to deal with it.
He didn't know how to deal with this.
So he divorced her and she's since passed in 2008.
So she's not no longer with us.
And so, um, for the long time I kept, you know, it'll pop up every now and then
that I blame my father for not being emotionally available, not showing me
how to choose a man or choose a husband.
And so I, I blamed that because, um, you know, I've had two failed marriages
and he met both of my husbands before I met married them, but not that he gave
me an okay, or not that he, you know, we talked.
about anything about it, like, okay, you gonna marry him?
Okay.
And so, and I said, I need to forgive him
for not being emotionally available because he was my boss.
We never had a father-daughter relationship.
He was my first boss.
And it was not until I was, my second marriage,
my first marriage ended and I moved away from the city
and I was no longer his employee.
I moved away from the city and moved to Florida
from Baltimore.
So then I said, okay, now finally we can have
the father-daughter relationship.
But, you know, that's been 30 years now.
And so I just sat here as you were talking,
I'm like, do I need to ask him?
Do I need to talk to him about that?
Because, I mean, I don't want him to feel bad
that he had a failed marriage with my mom.
And I think that's a generational thing.
I also want to ask for forgiveness
because I don't think that he showed me
how to choose a man.
And his, you know, he didn't show me,
is his relationship with my step-mom.
And he certainly didn't, you know, take me on dates
and that sort of thing.
Like I thought that I should be.
Yeah, like daddy-daughter dates.
He didn't take me on those.
Okay.
So I would encourage you to first pray and ask the Lord,
do you need to say those things to your dad?
Because ladies, sometimes we just need
to forgive them on paper.
We can write them a letter
and we don't need to give it to them.
Sometimes God does lead us to actually like
give somebody the written out,
like, or face-to-face, I forgive you for this.
Hey dad, can we have a conversation?
I'm going through heart healing
and there's some things that God's showing me
that have been really hard for me.
You know, just be praying and ask the Holy Spirit,
ask the Lord to show you
if that is something you need to have
an in-person conversation with your dad about.
Okay.
The other thing is that
the generational like experience is something
that I feel like God is going to enable you
to be a kinsman redeemer,
that the things don't have to continue after this.
And so I want to encourage you to come out of agreement
with any lies that you can't have
a healthy relationship that lasts.
Okay.
So any lies kind of circling around that,
dad and mom didn't have a healthy relationship that lasted
and now I'm not having healthy relationships.
God, you don't even care that I'm struggling.
Like anything that's kind of sounds and looks like that,
that you're coming out of agreement with those lies
and those belief systems and those thought patterns
and asking the Lord to reveal the truth to you
to replace the lie that's been kind of permeating
in your spirit.
And then,
yeah, I just, the emotional desire that like,
do you have an emotional connection with your dad now?
I do.
Okay, that's good.
That's good.
So that's progress, you know,
from what you wished you had experienced
when you were younger.
And there, I'm going to venture to say
your dad probably has regrets.
Having a spouse that has mental health struggles
is very hard.
A lot of times parents will shut down
if they don't know what to do.
Unfortunately, the children are caught up
in the middle of that, you know?
And so having-
He does.
He has regrets.
He apologized all the time for divorcing my mom.
He's 80 years old, they divorced when I was, I'm 60.
Okay, well, maybe that forgiveness conversation
will be very timely, Janie, then.
So yeah, just pray about that.
And let us know if you decide to do that.
Let us know like that you're going to
and then how it goes, okay?
Okay.
Awesome, ladies.
This has been a great night.
I'm so glad that you were here.
Let me pray for us and close this out.
Father, thank you.
Thank you for everything that's been accomplished tonight.
We thank you, God, for more revealings for healing
that will happen even as they sleep tonight,
as they go about their day tomorrow.
God, we thank you that we don't have
to have a spirit of fear,
but we can have a spirit of love
and of power and of a sound mind
that we are your daughters.
We are the co-heirs of the kingdom of heaven.
And so we thank you that even when the enemy
comes in like a flood, God,
that you raise up a standard against him
and you cause him to flee seven ways.
We thank you for your hedge of protection
around all of these women and their families, God.
We thank you that you would just help them
to hear what your spirit is saying louder
than any voice of the enemy.
God, we thank you that you would give them
a fresh revelation of who you are as God of love,
that you are the lover of their soul.
God, that you rejoice.
over them with singing and dancing, God, and that you would turn your face towards them
and that they would just experience the beauty of your glory resonating and just transforming
them from the inside out. And we just believe all these things in Jesus name. Amen. We love you.
I'll be seeing you all in the group and look forward to hearing what God is going to do this
week in all of your life. Oh, activation. Stephanie, thank you. Oh my gosh, I almost forgot.
Okay. I'll do this really quick this week. I want you to create a post in the group
about the squatters. You know, I was talking about the squatters. So what are the lies?
So different from the emotions. Okay. We've been talking about emotions and memories a lot tonight,
but what are the lies that you're realizing are in your heart that you're going to evict this week?
You're actually going to serve them an eviction notice and say, you can't stay in my heart
anymore. So come into the group, create that post. And we look forward to hearing about those
eviction notices this week in the group. All right. Thanks for that reminder, Stephanie.
Appreciate you. All right, everybody have a good night.