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Welcome, welcome, so glad that y'all are joining here.

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Kristen, thanks.

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I saw that in the chat.

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I appreciate you.

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Welcome, everyone.

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I'm Bethany Cooper.

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I'm one of the Master Heart Work coaches here in the community.

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I'm so excited to be here with you tonight.

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I want to just say on that note, Helen, really the best way is if you all really feel connected

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with someone in a breakout session, you know, yeah, you can exchange numbers.

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But I really want you all to not get distracted during coaching sessions or live, especially

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Supernatural Saturday, because what can happen is people can miss even a tidbit.

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Now obviously God can get that to you another way, for sure.

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I believe that.

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But let's just really lean into what the Holy Spirit is going to say tonight.

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So it's not that we're like, you're going to get in trouble or anything like that.

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It can really cause people to not pay attention.

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But you all can totally engage in the chat regarding what I'm talking about.

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And when you do that, honestly, as God is speaking to you about things or things are

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coming up in you, there are times where God will use that to have me segue into another

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point that's really important.

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So it's not that you all can't, you know, say things at all in there, but I just want

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us to stay on topic.

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But welcome.

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So glad that you're here joining us.

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I appreciate you too, Helen, appreciate all you beautiful ladies, so many joining us again

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tonight.

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You've been here before.

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Welcome back.

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If you're joining us new for the first time, you've never been here before.

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We'd love for you to put that in the chat for us so we can welcome you.

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We're so glad that you're here with us tonight.

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God is doing so much in this community, man, people are getting set free.

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They're getting delivered.

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They're healing.

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They're growing.

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They're stepping into their love stories.

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If you don't know, I am one of the success stories of the last year, single community.

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My husband and I will be celebrating three years of marriage in September.

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Y'all, this is real.

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This is real.

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And if it can happen for me, it can happen for you a promise.

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And so I want to encourage you with that as we're getting started.

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Welcome.

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A lot of first timers here tonight, Meg are Pamela.

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Is it Richland, Richland?

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Tell me how to say your name.

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Yes.

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Richland.

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Richland.

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Thank you for that.

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Camille.

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Hopefully I said that right.

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Jade.

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And then tell me what your first name is on the last one, because I see Chan.

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Tell me how to say it.

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Chanmi.

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Chanmi?

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Chanmi, yeah.

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It's Korean.

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Chanmi.

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Chanmi, yeah.

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Okay.

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Okay.

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Gotcha.

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So I don't need to say the G basically in there.

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Love that.

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Oh, no G.

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Just C-H-A-N-M-I.

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Yep.

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Got it.

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Thank you so much.

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And then Hannah's new.

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Welcome.

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Welcome.

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Welcome.

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We're so glad that you're here joining us, and we are going to go ahead and get started

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on a couple of housekeeping things.

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Want to say that on the weekends, especially more than even during the week, you all, if

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you put a post up in the group and you don't get an immediate response, please don't take

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it down.

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Sometimes on the weekends, because I'm also helping my husband pastor a church here in

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Fort Myers, Florida, sometimes the weekends can get a little crazy, you all, so my team

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and I do our best to get in there and respond to you all in no more than 12 hours, but if

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it does ever go past that, please don't believe any fear or lies of the enemy and take those

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things down.

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It's just that we haven't been able to fully get in there, but we will get in there and

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get to you.

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I have some people that I even need to respond to tonight after this session, so I just want

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you all to know that up front, because the enemy tries to be busy, busy, busy, and convince

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people to take things down.

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Don't want you to fall into that.

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On that note, if you're not sure where to even post in our group, when you go into the

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last year single app, there's a tab called community.

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In that community tab, there are some sub tabs, all, wins, and ask a coach.

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If you have a question specifically for one of the coaches, myself included, you can put

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it under that sub tab.

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If you put it under a different tab, we're still going to see it and we're going to still

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answer it, even if it's a question, just so you know.

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So go ahead and do your best to put it wherever you think it fits.

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If we're doing an activation or you're posting your Jesus Cares board, or you just need to

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ask a question about something that I've started talking to you about during a live session,

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y'all can just put that under all.

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We'll see them.

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We'll see them.

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But just want y'all to know that that's where you can find that.

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And then the last thing, if you haven't created an introduction post yet, you're new here,

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or maybe you've been here for a few weeks and you just tend to be a little bit more

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shy or maybe you don't really know if it matters if you do a post, even though we say, please

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do an introduction post.

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Here's the thing.

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It does matter.

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It does matter.

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For those of you that are on screen, way to go.

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You're already on screen without me asking tonight.

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I love you.

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it for those of you that sometimes I know you can't come on screen so we totally understand,

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but for those of you that have never heard me say this, we do want to encourage you to come

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on screen live so we can see you during sessions. It's a good practice for you to come out of

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hiding, allowing yourself to be seen. Yes, we're on computers and yes, you're on a screen, but man,

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when I can see you, it just changes things. It just changes dynamics. So I want to encourage

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y'all to practice doing that. And then my last two, very quick, Supernatural Saturday, you all,

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man, right out of the gate, Jackie dropped the truth bomb that we can believe a lie at times,

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that as soon as we find a spirit mate, it's going to cure all of our loneliness problems.

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Like right out of the gate, mic drop. She dropped that bomb and it's so true. I can tell you,

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I love my husband. I'm so glad that I have him as a best friend in my life, but I know I still

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need some girls. I still need some girlfriends in my camp. And it's just, it's so true what she said.

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And so if you haven't heard it yet, she also taught about different types of friends that

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we're going to have seasons, reasons, treasons. And then the core one that we want to work towards

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is covenant friendships. Okay. And so really allow that. I'm going to say that's a supernatural

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session that people should listen to more than once, because you got to really let some of this

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stuff soak in so that you can hear who is the Lord revealing to you about the teachings and who are

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maybe some people that you need to move on from to make room for the new covenant friendships that

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God's going to bring your way. And then last night we did prophetic ministry night and we did a combo.

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We activated Supernatural Saturday stuff a little bit, and then we released some prophetic words.

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And so I want you all to check those out. The replay I just looked before I came on live,

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the replay for prophetic ministry night is not under the replay tab yet, but I believe it'll be

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there hopefully by tomorrow afternoon. We have a couple of people on vacation that are on the team.

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So hopefully that'll be there for everyone, but I do want you all to kind of look for that this week.

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All right, let me pray for us. Father, thank you so much for this night. We thank you God for

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just the truth that you give us fresh mercy every morning, that it's new, that you're fresh,

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that you're coming in and bringing truth and life and revitalizing us from the inside out. God,

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we thank you for fixer-up projects. God, you're the best one at fixing up things that are broken

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in us. God, we thank you for revealings for healing that are going to happen tonight.

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God, we're asking for a supernatural acceleration in healing. God, that you are the great physician.

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Nothing's too hard for you. So Lord, where we have doubt, where we have unbelief, and we're

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even wondering at times, is anything going to be different? God, I pray that you would just come

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and make your habitation among us tonight, that you would help us to hear what your spirit is

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saying louder than any voice of the enemy, that every doubt would be dispelled, that healing

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would break out, Lord God. And we know that revival in communities comes through revival in us. So

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revive us, oh Lord. Revive us and heal us and redeem the broken and fallen places. Lord, I thank

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you that you go into even the areas where it feels broken down and you lift those places up, God, by

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your grace and your goodness and your favor and your love. And we just thank you, God, that where

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those that have come in tonight, where they've even felt pressed down and not really even sure,

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God, they feel like you're doing something and you've drawn them here, but God, the enemy still

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comes in so quick to distract, to press down. We thank you, God, that you would just lift them up

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tonight, take their feet out of the muck and the mire, set their feet upon the rock, and help them

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to understand that you are always fighting for them. You're on their side, God, and you're not

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going to fail them. God, we thank you that you'll help us to partner with you in the process. In

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Jesus' name, amen, amen, amen. So we're talking about forgiveness tonight, ladies. I haven't talked

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about it for a while. It's time. It's time for all of us to take a journey back through

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forgiveness and all the things that God wants to release tonight. I'm going to start with a quote

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from the HeartWork book, but it's by Martin Luther King, okay? So it's actually a Martin

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Luther King Jr. quote, and this is what it says. We must develop and maintain the capacity

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to forgive. He who is devout of the power to forgive is devout of the power to love.

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Why don't you hear that again? We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who

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is devout of the power to forgive is devout of the power to love. Light and darkness cannot coexist.

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As soon as light, the light of Jesus Christ comes into any dark area, it is illuminated,

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and darkness has to flee. Y'all, love and hatred.

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hatred cannot coexist. It can't. Some of you even internally struggle with self-hatred,

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self-loathing, self-pity, these self-deprecating types of thoughts, and it's causing you to

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actually not be able to step into the fullness of what God has for you because you're literally

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internally allowing the enemy to defeat you on a regular basis. So tonight, I want you

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to be thinking about where is the Lord inviting you into forgiveness, but you're even telling

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him you can't forgive that person. Because Lord, if you knew what they did, see, he knows

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though. He already knows what they did. He already knows how hard it is for you to forgive.

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But the same power that rose Jesus Christ from the dead, it's living in you. If you've

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accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior and as your Lord, that's operating in you, and

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we can call on the power of the Holy Spirit to help us to forgive, to step into grace,

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to step into new directions and new life and new hope, but it starts with forgiveness ladies.

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It starts with forgiveness. And so tonight, I want you to be thinking about the truth

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and the reality that forgiveness along with repentance and confession is the only thing

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that has the power to put you back in touch with your authentic identity. Who God originally

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created you to be, your authentic identity, forgiveness, repentance, and confession are

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keys to you literally stepping further into that place, that person, that identity. Not

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the counterfeit identities, not the things that are causing confusion and chaos, doubt,

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unbelief, bitterness, resentment, the patterns of unforgiveness. Some of y'all, it's not

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just your battle that you're fighting regarding forgiveness, but for generations, your family

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has not forgiven. Y'all, I didn't even think about this this afternoon, but this just came

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up in my spirit. The girl's dad, my spiritual daughters, their dad and their family, there

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was a lot of brokenness, you know, and I will say that sometimes it's just really hard

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and I get that. But when I look at some of the situations, man, the sons were carrying

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the burdens and the unforgiveness of the father to such a degree that if this man that they

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were all mad at, who had an affair with their mom, if he even came around this one time,

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he was literally sitting in the truck at church. He didn't come in, he was sitting

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in the parking lot. Mind you, we all had just walked out of church and they all went, hey,

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you know what? Because this dude sitting in the parking lot, he brought their mom to church

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so that she could come to church with the grandkids and the family, but they had so

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much bitterness and hatred and unforgiveness and entitlement that they literally walked

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out of church and started this argument in the parking lot with this man. Doesn't that

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seem off? I remember thinking like, what is happening right now? How do we just walk out

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of that amazing service? And y'all are literally like in moments stepping into that. Well,

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the problem is, is that bitter roots been there for a long time. And instead of the

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younger sons working to break that in their hearts and minds and spirits, they're now

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carrying it on for their father. And here's the thing, the mother chose, right? Okay.

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So when you be thinking about that, even in your own families and your own, and that might

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not apply to some of you and that's totally okay. But there are some people here tonight

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that the Lord is saying like, Hey, it's time to do something different. It's time to look

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different than how your family for generations has looked. It's time to not, not continue

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to take up that unforgiveness for your mom or your dad or whoever it is. And it's time

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to lay that down and forgive. I don't know who that's for, but it's for someone. So I

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trust the Lord in that. So as we start to go into this more tonight, forgiveness breaks

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tethers. I want you to think about the person that hurt you and yourself. Tethering is like

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you're tied to them. Okay. I talk about tether ball games a lot because I used to play that

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in elementary school for people that have been on these sessions several times for weeks.

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You may have heard me tell this before, but a tether ball would, there'd be a pole and

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then there was a rope and the rope was connected to a ball.

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and they would connect it to the pole

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and the kids would stand around

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and you'd hit the ball back and forth.

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Some of you might know what I'm talking about.

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Some of you in other countries might be like, no clue.

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I don't know if they play that in Europe

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or other places like Australia, I have no clue.

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But it was like a game.

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But at the same time,

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God always takes me back to the reality of,

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A, that ball and rope always stayed on the pole

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until someone removed it.

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And B, people stood and hit it around,

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they're batting it around.

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And I just kind of thought this afternoon

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even about this a little bit more.

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That's how unforgiveness is, really, if you think about it.

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Sometimes you're kind of just stuck in this cycle

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of batting the ball back around.

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You know, it's almost like

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you're in multiple places on the court

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and you're just, it's batting all of the pain

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and the trauma and the triggers back and forth,

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back and forth.

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And at some point, the Holy Spirit is saying,

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are you willing to take that off of the pole?

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Are you willing to surrender this part of your heart,

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this part of your life?

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Are you willing to give it to me

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and allow me to do with it what I think needs to be done?

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Are you willing to allow me to defend you,

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to fight for you?

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And for some, it's like, well, wait,

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God, you're not defending me

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because something's still happening in the physical realm.

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People are abusing people.

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We had this afternoon, a woman in our community,

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she shared that, you know,

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somebody that was an ex-fiance, when they broke up,

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he went after her, attacked her.

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All kinds of court stuff has had to happen.

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Stalked her.

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That's horrible.

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That's horrible for anybody

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to have to go through that kind of stuff.

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And so the dynamic that we struggle with is,

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wait a minute, if this is happening in the physical realm,

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God, how is that you defending me?

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But remember that the thief is the one

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that comes to kill, steal, and destroy.

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The enemy is still at work

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and he's still causing things to happen

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to contradict who God is.

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One of his number one things

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is he always wants you to doubt God's faithfulness

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and his love for you at the core.

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If he can get you to believe that God doesn't love you,

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he doesn't come through for you,

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and he does not protect you,

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and that he doesn't love you,

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that's the crux.

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That's the crux of everything else, you all.

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And so he's always going after that.

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So tonight I wanna encourage you,

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you know, the reality is this,

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is that when you go through situations,

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some of you need to forgive God,

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not because God did something wrong,

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but because you've held him responsible.

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I want you to let that sink in a little bit.

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You're holding God responsible

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for something God didn't do.

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Just like Jesus, I feel the Holy Spirit on this,

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was sent to the cross,

292
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yet he was innocent.

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But I want you to know that God is big enough,

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he understands, his shoulders are wide enough,

295
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he's not angry with you.

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He knows why you felt the way that you felt,

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and he's compassionate,

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and he's loving and kind towards you.

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He's not looking at you with anger.

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He has love in his heart and his eyes for you,

301
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and he wants to lead you into truth further tonight.

302
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So we're gonna keep going.

303
00:18:38.780 --> 00:18:41.220
So remember I talked about the sin of the cross,

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I talked about the tethers,

305
00:18:43.500 --> 00:18:45.900
and when we don't forgive people, we're bound to them,

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we're bound to the trauma.

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So those people that harmed you when you don't forgive,

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you're literally choosing to stay connected to them

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like this, okay?

310
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But if you forgive them, guess what starts to happen?

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Release starts to happen.

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You no longer are tethered to those people

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and those memories and those places and spaces.

314
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Forgiving people isn't forgetting.

315
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You will remember what happened for the most part.

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Sometimes God will literally remove the memories from us

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because it's just too much.

318
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But y'all, I remember most of what happened in my life,

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at least the things that did bring,

320
00:19:29.780 --> 00:19:31.300
like God did bring to the surface

321
00:19:31.300 --> 00:19:33.100
that I did remember over the years.

322
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But I can forgive people,

323
00:19:36.780 --> 00:19:41.780
and actually God removed the pain of this situation.

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I remember, but I don't feel the depth

325
00:19:44.900 --> 00:19:47.940
of the pain of those things anymore.

326
00:19:47.940 --> 00:19:51.380
Now, fresh stuff, yeah, I might still feel some pain there,

327
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but the more that we heal and the more that we process,

328
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the more that we continue to move towards the things

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that God has for us,

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the more the sting.

331
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:02.360
of death and the sting of pain,

332
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and the sting of trauma gets removed from us.

333
00:20:06.120 --> 00:20:07.440
I want you to be thinking about,

334
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I love to give this analogy,

335
00:20:08.680 --> 00:20:10.600
and I remembered my sunglasses tonight.

336
00:20:10.600 --> 00:20:12.800
I laughed this afternoon because the last couple of times

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I've wanted to do this, I kept forgetting my sunglasses,

338
00:20:15.640 --> 00:20:17.560
but I remembered, I remembered tonight,

339
00:20:17.560 --> 00:20:20.520
y'all these are not fancy ones, they're old.

340
00:20:20.520 --> 00:20:25.520
So, but I use these ones because they're the UV kind.

341
00:20:25.520 --> 00:20:28.360
So when I look at things that are supposed to look white,

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they look kind of peachy orange.

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And the reason I like to use this example is because,

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like this one day we went to the beach

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when we first moved here to Fort Myers,

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and we're looking at the clouds.

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And I said to my husband like,

348
00:20:42.080 --> 00:20:44.440
oh my gosh, look at those peach clouds over there.

349
00:20:44.440 --> 00:20:46.760
This is kind of a silly moment, y'all.

350
00:20:46.760 --> 00:20:48.560
And he's like, what are you talking about?

351
00:20:48.560 --> 00:20:50.300
I was like, over there, don't you see them?

352
00:20:50.300 --> 00:20:52.640
They're like beautiful, it's like peachy pink.

353
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And he's like, Bethany, those are white.

354
00:20:55.120 --> 00:20:57.680
Y'all, I totally forgot I had my sunglasses on.

355
00:20:57.680 --> 00:20:59.520
I totally forgot I had my sunglasses on,

356
00:20:59.520 --> 00:21:01.840
but it was like this aha moment for me.

357
00:21:03.040 --> 00:21:07.560
Because it hit me how much glasses and filters

358
00:21:09.400 --> 00:21:10.960
can change the way we see something.

359
00:21:10.960 --> 00:21:12.920
Now that was still pretty,

360
00:21:12.920 --> 00:21:15.140
but let's talk about if these sunglasses

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00:21:15.140 --> 00:21:17.360
actually represent unforgiveness.

362
00:21:20.400 --> 00:21:22.040
I want you to think about literally

363
00:21:22.040 --> 00:21:24.360
how often unforgiveness is tainting

364
00:21:24.360 --> 00:21:26.860
the way you see yourself, other people,

365
00:21:26.860 --> 00:21:28.260
the way you see God,

366
00:21:28.260 --> 00:21:30.440
the way that you're actually experiencing

367
00:21:30.440 --> 00:21:31.900
the world around you.

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00:21:31.900 --> 00:21:34.820
You all, imagine if these were over my ears.

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00:21:34.820 --> 00:21:37.700
Everything that I'm hearing, even when it's truth,

370
00:21:37.700 --> 00:21:40.260
it's getting filtered through unforgiveness

371
00:21:40.260 --> 00:21:43.180
and brokenness and bitterness.

372
00:21:45.160 --> 00:21:46.940
Bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness

373
00:21:46.940 --> 00:21:49.000
hang out together, they're buddies.

374
00:21:50.020 --> 00:21:52.220
So if you're struggling with like bitterness

375
00:21:52.220 --> 00:21:54.440
and you're angry a lot,

376
00:21:54.440 --> 00:21:57.260
y'all most likely there's unforgiveness in there

377
00:21:57.260 --> 00:21:59.100
that you need to forgive someone.

378
00:22:01.160 --> 00:22:02.640
And so you're interacting with people

379
00:22:02.640 --> 00:22:04.480
because you're seeing everything through these filters,

380
00:22:04.480 --> 00:22:05.720
you're interacting differently,

381
00:22:05.720 --> 00:22:07.240
you're kind of holding back,

382
00:22:07.240 --> 00:22:08.720
you're not really being your full self.

383
00:22:08.720 --> 00:22:12.700
Even when you want to be, subconsciously you can't

384
00:22:12.700 --> 00:22:15.300
because unforgiveness holds us back.

385
00:22:15.300 --> 00:22:18.300
It always stops the flow of the Holy Spirit,

386
00:22:18.300 --> 00:22:20.360
the bitter root even more so.

387
00:22:20.360 --> 00:22:21.200
I'm gonna take these off now

388
00:22:21.200 --> 00:22:22.660
because y'all can get the point.

389
00:22:22.660 --> 00:22:26.500
But I want you to understand that this is a really big deal

390
00:22:28.420 --> 00:22:32.240
when the bitter root, unforgiveness, unresolved

391
00:22:32.240 --> 00:22:34.660
is how it turns into resentment.

392
00:22:34.660 --> 00:22:37.420
And the more that you resent, the more that the person,

393
00:22:37.420 --> 00:22:40.660
especially if somebody is a repeat offender,

394
00:22:40.660 --> 00:22:41.860
they just continue to hurt you

395
00:22:41.860 --> 00:22:44.880
and they continue to hurt you and it's not changing.

396
00:22:44.880 --> 00:22:46.020
And even though you're praying

397
00:22:46.020 --> 00:22:48.540
and you're trying to do everything you can

398
00:22:48.540 --> 00:22:50.680
to shift that situation,

399
00:22:50.680 --> 00:22:52.900
it's hurting you over and over again.

400
00:22:53.960 --> 00:22:56.040
Well, oftentimes that's when the bitter root

401
00:22:56.040 --> 00:22:57.040
comes into play.

402
00:22:58.320 --> 00:23:02.400
Remember, unforgiveness, unresolved, you're not forgiving

403
00:23:02.400 --> 00:23:04.240
is turning into resentments,

404
00:23:04.240 --> 00:23:07.700
deep seated resentments and offense.

405
00:23:08.880 --> 00:23:10.680
And then it's turning into these bitter roots.

406
00:23:10.680 --> 00:23:12.400
I want to read something to you.

407
00:23:12.400 --> 00:23:13.920
Hebrews 12, 15 says this,

408
00:23:13.920 --> 00:23:16.840
see to it that no one falls short of the grace of God

409
00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:20.960
and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble

410
00:23:20.960 --> 00:23:23.720
and defile many.

411
00:23:23.720 --> 00:23:26.520
The tail end of the King James version of that,

412
00:23:26.520 --> 00:23:27.640
yep, this is old school,

413
00:23:27.640 --> 00:23:30.100
but I wanted to read the difference in this.

414
00:23:30.100 --> 00:23:34.800
Lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you

415
00:23:34.800 --> 00:23:38.000
and thereby many be defiled.

416
00:23:38.000 --> 00:23:39.840
I think most people know what bitterness is,

417
00:23:39.840 --> 00:23:43.200
but I'm still gonna read in the Greek understanding

418
00:23:43.200 --> 00:23:46.600
of this scripture, this is what it says.

419
00:23:47.360 --> 00:23:51.120
Bitter gall, extreme wickedness, a bitter root

420
00:23:51.120 --> 00:23:54.040
and so producing bitter fruit.

421
00:23:54.040 --> 00:23:55.600
For those of you that were here last week,

422
00:23:55.600 --> 00:23:58.600
we talked about our roots and fruits activation, didn't we?

423
00:24:00.360 --> 00:24:04.400
Metaphorically, it also represents bitterness, bitter hatred.

424
00:24:07.240 --> 00:24:09.100
All right, so I know it's heavy,

425
00:24:09.100 --> 00:24:10.680
but we need to talk about it.

426
00:24:10.680 --> 00:24:11.640
We need to think about it.

427
00:24:11.640 --> 00:24:13.880
We need to be asking the Lord where,

428
00:24:13.880 --> 00:24:17.920
is there anywhere in me that I'm holding bitterness,

429
00:24:17.920 --> 00:24:20.660
resentment or unforgiveness towards someone?

430
00:24:21.720 --> 00:24:25.280
And Lord, I pray that you would help me to choose to forgive

431
00:24:25.280 --> 00:24:29.500
and allow your healing waters to come into those places,

432
00:24:29.500 --> 00:24:33.000
to literally come into every dead area, every broken area,

433
00:24:33.000 --> 00:24:35.760
every hardened, stony part of my heart

434
00:24:35.760 --> 00:24:39.640
and start to bring life and water into those places.

435
00:24:39.640 --> 00:24:43.320
It's literally like a dam that's been stopped up.

436
00:24:43.760 --> 00:24:45.080
And as soon as we forgive you all,

437
00:24:45.080 --> 00:24:47.920
even if we don't feel it in the physical realm,

438
00:24:47.920 --> 00:24:50.740
I'm telling you, this is what happens in the spiritual realm.

439
00:24:50.740 --> 00:24:52.560
It literally removes all the debris,

440
00:24:52.560 --> 00:24:55.440
everything that's been blocking up the flow of the water

441
00:24:55.440 --> 00:24:57.140
and the water begins to flow

442
00:24:57.140 --> 00:25:00.160
and truth starts to get illuminated to us.

443
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:04.720
More than ever before we start to hear the voice of the father a little bit more clearly

444
00:25:04.960 --> 00:25:10.880
Everything that's been dull and and dark and dim it starts to feel light again

445
00:25:13.440 --> 00:25:16.520
And for some of you I know this comes up every single time

446
00:25:17.200 --> 00:25:21.160
I've tried to forgive somebody I have forgiven somebody but man

447
00:25:21.160 --> 00:25:26.920
It just keeps coming up like God just keeps bringing them up and I don't understand. Did I not forgive correctly?

448
00:25:26.920 --> 00:25:29.960
Yes, you did you forgave but here's the thing

449
00:25:32.160 --> 00:25:35.280
Healing happens in layers and so does forgiveness a

450
00:25:36.160 --> 00:25:40.560
Lot of times that's not taught in the church. They're just like forgive and you should just be done with that thing

451
00:25:42.320 --> 00:25:46.080
They might not say it that way but that's kind of how it's conveyed at times

452
00:25:47.040 --> 00:25:49.040
but the reality is is that

453
00:25:50.320 --> 00:25:52.320
Five years ago

454
00:25:52.320 --> 00:25:58.920
Five years ago the revelation that I had about a situation is entirely different than what I see now

455
00:26:01.160 --> 00:26:06.800
The reason I'm saying that to you is that wherever you were I'm just using five years ago as an example

456
00:26:08.040 --> 00:26:10.640
Let's say you forgave the first time then

457
00:26:11.320 --> 00:26:16.240
You're forgiving based off of the knowledge that you have in that moment of the situation

458
00:26:17.080 --> 00:26:24.200
The the perspective that God has given you the things he's highlighting to you about the situation the person and you're doing your best to

459
00:26:24.200 --> 00:26:31.360
forgive in that moment in that space and all of those things that were shown to you and then you journey further and

460
00:26:31.560 --> 00:26:37.400
Then it's coming back up because hey the Lord the Holy Spirit's kind of like hey

461
00:26:37.400 --> 00:26:41.920
I want you to take another look at this thing not because you didn't do something, right?

462
00:26:42.280 --> 00:26:45.300
But because I have something else to show you about it

463
00:26:46.400 --> 00:26:52.280
There's another layer of healing that needs to happen here because the pain of that thing was deep

464
00:26:53.480 --> 00:26:56.400
Last night on the prophetic ministry night. One of the things

465
00:26:57.400 --> 00:27:03.000
That came up was before I even hopped on and y'all when you hear the recording if you weren't there live

466
00:27:03.000 --> 00:27:06.200
You'll hear it before I hopped on I always do this Lord

467
00:27:06.320 --> 00:27:12.720
What's what's something you want to convey to your people tonight to those that are part of this movement in this community?

468
00:27:12.720 --> 00:27:15.760
What's something you want to convey and you all I kept seeing a band-aid

469
00:27:16.280 --> 00:27:19.800
Literally multiple times. I'm like Lord. What's this about? What's the band-aid about and

470
00:27:20.720 --> 00:27:26.400
When I asked him that I saw him like as if the Lord was coming to someone's arm

471
00:27:26.400 --> 00:27:32.360
I'm just gonna use that as an example and there was a band-aid there and he was lovingly removing the band-aid

472
00:27:32.960 --> 00:27:39.400
But then I saw him take some needle and thread and he was starting to stitch the arm

473
00:27:39.400 --> 00:27:41.560
But it wasn't on this surface you all I

474
00:27:42.400 --> 00:27:48.600
Literally saw him stitching down in like if your arm, you know was really sliced guess what y'all

475
00:27:48.600 --> 00:27:52.320
They got a stitch on the inside first, and then they stitched the top

476
00:27:52.680 --> 00:27:56.840
well, well the what I saw was the Lord was stitching down on the inside and

477
00:27:57.960 --> 00:28:01.280
So I'm using that as an example tonight because that's where some of you are

478
00:28:02.720 --> 00:28:08.680
You did your best to heal where you were at. But for some of you it was a band-aid

479
00:28:08.680 --> 00:28:10.680
It wasn't a long-term

480
00:28:11.160 --> 00:28:14.360
Healing solution, but again, you didn't do anything wrong

481
00:28:14.360 --> 00:28:17.960
But the Holy Spirit's coming because he's got an upgrade and healing for you

482
00:28:18.400 --> 00:28:21.480
He's gonna go deeper into that place because you're ready now

483
00:28:22.720 --> 00:28:29.680
You're ready now and so he'll lead you with with grace and and mercy and he's gonna give you the enablement to do it

484
00:28:30.120 --> 00:28:33.600
All right. I'm gonna keep going when we have those filters of

485
00:28:34.120 --> 00:28:40.760
Unforgiveness bitterness resentment. It gives us a really hard time being able to give and receive love

486
00:28:41.440 --> 00:28:47.400
It also causes us to really struggle to remain in connection with God ourselves and other people

487
00:28:48.160 --> 00:28:50.520
I'm gonna read something from the heart workbook tonight

488
00:28:50.520 --> 00:28:52.520
Not a lot, but I do want to touch on this

489
00:28:52.600 --> 00:28:56.560
This is when Jackie was talking about for those of you that have just started you'll get there

490
00:28:56.560 --> 00:29:01.600
You'll read this eventually you don't have to skip ahead to this. So just kind of receive it tonight

491
00:29:02.000 --> 00:29:09.080
But Jackie's talking about this time that she was dating someone and they ended up going to Captain D's and she was meeting his family

492
00:29:09.080 --> 00:29:11.080
and it was this whole big thing and

493
00:29:11.240 --> 00:29:14.360
She ends up eating the food there at Captain D's and gets sick

494
00:29:15.640 --> 00:29:18.440
really really sick food poisoning sick and

495
00:29:20.360 --> 00:29:25.720
After that incident she says every time I saw the sign to Captain D's or any advertising for the restaurant

496
00:29:25.720 --> 00:29:28.120
I felt sick all over again

497
00:29:28.680 --> 00:29:35.800
It's a good thing there wasn't social media back then because I would have definitely posted some terrible things about old captain after all

498
00:29:36.080 --> 00:29:38.080
He did this to me

499
00:29:38.840 --> 00:29:41.860
We tell ourselves some version of this lie every day

500
00:29:42.560 --> 00:29:46.920
This is their fault. Not mine. They did this to me

501
00:29:47.960 --> 00:29:54.040
But the truth is the restaurant didn't make me sick. I was already carrying the virus

502
00:29:54.040 --> 00:30:00.400
It was it was inside of me before I even ordered my food no matter

503
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.520
Matter what food I ate, my stomach was poised

504
00:30:02.520 --> 00:30:05.480
and ready to be upset and hurl it back at me,

505
00:30:05.480 --> 00:30:09.220
but I couldn't see it because I had a blind spot.

506
00:30:10.140 --> 00:30:12.420
Now, I'm not saying that people haven't done things

507
00:30:12.420 --> 00:30:14.960
to hurt you, okay, that caused you harm,

508
00:30:14.960 --> 00:30:18.220
but what I am saying is that so many of us

509
00:30:18.220 --> 00:30:20.360
already had trauma in our lives

510
00:30:20.360 --> 00:30:22.960
before those incidents ever came.

511
00:30:23.880 --> 00:30:25.380
Unless it's something that happened to you

512
00:30:25.380 --> 00:30:27.500
when you were very little, that's different.

513
00:30:27.500 --> 00:30:29.380
But I'm talking about the additional things

514
00:30:29.440 --> 00:30:33.680
that came along the way, where at times,

515
00:30:36.180 --> 00:30:38.400
it's just sometimes easier for us to blame

516
00:30:38.400 --> 00:30:40.240
the other person for the whole thing.

517
00:30:42.720 --> 00:30:43.680
What do I mean by that?

518
00:30:43.680 --> 00:30:46.440
Well, what I mean by that is my spiritual daughters,

519
00:30:46.440 --> 00:30:50.280
I dated their dad for six years, way too many years.

520
00:30:50.280 --> 00:30:53.040
It was very unhealthy the entire time.

521
00:30:53.040 --> 00:30:55.280
Y'all, I saw red flags in the beginning,

522
00:30:55.280 --> 00:30:58.760
but because I was so caught up in the fantasy,

523
00:30:58.780 --> 00:31:01.620
the fake stuff he showed me in the beginning,

524
00:31:01.620 --> 00:31:03.340
that I just didn't listen to the Lord.

525
00:31:03.340 --> 00:31:06.260
And I've shared that a little bit in the previous weeks,

526
00:31:06.260 --> 00:31:09.520
but I want y'all to understand for a while there,

527
00:31:10.380 --> 00:31:12.900
yes, he did things that were hurtful.

528
00:31:12.900 --> 00:31:15.120
He did a lot of betrayal things.

529
00:31:15.120 --> 00:31:17.420
There was a lot going on there,

530
00:31:17.420 --> 00:31:22.180
but I chose to stay in that relationship.

531
00:31:22.180 --> 00:31:23.060
I chose.

532
00:31:24.560 --> 00:31:27.260
God didn't make me do that.

533
00:31:27.260 --> 00:31:30.000
Now, I will tell you that my counterfeit identities

534
00:31:30.000 --> 00:31:32.200
in the beginning were telling me to do that.

535
00:31:32.200 --> 00:31:34.600
They were telling me how good he was,

536
00:31:34.600 --> 00:31:38.080
but I was seeing through lenses that were not healthy,

537
00:31:38.080 --> 00:31:40.160
that were not correct.

538
00:31:40.160 --> 00:31:43.800
And when God was showing me, God was whispering to me like,

539
00:31:43.800 --> 00:31:45.700
hey, you're not the woman at the well.

540
00:31:45.700 --> 00:31:47.280
This guy's not for you.

541
00:31:49.760 --> 00:31:51.880
He was totally fine with doing things

542
00:31:51.880 --> 00:31:53.780
that Christians aren't supposed to do,

543
00:31:54.700 --> 00:31:56.080
if you know what I'm saying.

544
00:31:57.400 --> 00:32:00.400
And God was saying, hey, that's not you.

545
00:32:00.400 --> 00:32:01.460
That's not your story.

546
00:32:01.460 --> 00:32:03.120
That's not what I have for you.

547
00:32:03.120 --> 00:32:05.840
And y'all, I didn't a lot of the time,

548
00:32:05.840 --> 00:32:07.400
but man, there were a lot of things

549
00:32:07.400 --> 00:32:09.280
where there was a lot of pressure and abuse

550
00:32:09.280 --> 00:32:13.160
and manipulation and people can wear you down sometimes.

551
00:32:14.160 --> 00:32:16.880
But I chose to be in that situation.

552
00:32:16.880 --> 00:32:21.120
That wasn't God's fault, but I was mad at God about it.

553
00:32:22.280 --> 00:32:24.760
God, why did you lead me into this relationship?

554
00:32:25.580 --> 00:32:30.580
Because I believed he did, but y'all, he didn't.

555
00:32:31.580 --> 00:32:34.260
That relationship presented itself

556
00:32:34.260 --> 00:32:37.620
and I chose to go into it, okay?

557
00:32:37.620 --> 00:32:40.820
My unhealthy filters and mindsets and heart postures

558
00:32:40.820 --> 00:32:42.540
and things that still needed healed

559
00:32:42.540 --> 00:32:45.340
caused me to choose someone that was really unhealthy.

560
00:32:45.340 --> 00:32:47.180
All right, I'm gonna keep moving,

561
00:32:47.180 --> 00:32:49.360
but I'm saying all that to say,

562
00:32:50.380 --> 00:32:52.620
not only do we need to forgive other people,

563
00:32:52.620 --> 00:32:55.400
forgive God, but we need to forgive ourselves.

564
00:32:55.400 --> 00:32:58.040
Y'all, I beat myself up for that for a long time.

565
00:32:59.360 --> 00:33:01.880
How could I be so dumb to pick someone like that

566
00:33:01.880 --> 00:33:04.660
and stay in it for this many years?

567
00:33:04.660 --> 00:33:06.300
I wasted all that time.

568
00:33:08.780 --> 00:33:10.520
But I had to choose to forgive myself

569
00:33:10.520 --> 00:33:14.760
because I didn't know what I didn't know until I knew it.

570
00:33:15.800 --> 00:33:17.760
And there were things that needed healing.

571
00:33:17.760 --> 00:33:18.840
Like, and I was faithful.

572
00:33:18.840 --> 00:33:20.680
I was a faithful Christian serving,

573
00:33:20.680 --> 00:33:22.240
but there were just areas where,

574
00:33:22.240 --> 00:33:23.680
because of the pain of the past,

575
00:33:23.680 --> 00:33:26.420
the subconscious things that were causing me

576
00:33:26.420 --> 00:33:30.160
to make decisions in my romantic life

577
00:33:30.160 --> 00:33:32.660
that were causing me to be stuck and held back.

578
00:33:34.180 --> 00:33:35.940
And once I forgave myself, y'all,

579
00:33:35.940 --> 00:33:38.540
it started changing a lot of things.

580
00:33:38.540 --> 00:33:43.160
Matthew 22, 39, love your neighbor as you love yourself.

581
00:33:44.820 --> 00:33:46.700
Here's the tricky part.

582
00:33:46.700 --> 00:33:48.500
The church tells us to love ourselves,

583
00:33:48.500 --> 00:33:49.760
and I think for the most part,

584
00:33:49.760 --> 00:33:52.620
we do that to the best of our ability.

585
00:33:52.620 --> 00:33:56.900
But some of you all, you really don't love yourself.

586
00:33:56.900 --> 00:34:00.100
And so it's making it really hard to love other people.

587
00:34:00.100 --> 00:34:03.000
Even when you say you want a relationship,

588
00:34:03.000 --> 00:34:08.000
friends, romantic people get close and you get all prickly.

589
00:34:08.199 --> 00:34:10.280
I think this afternoon I said porcupine,

590
00:34:10.280 --> 00:34:13.400
that they just, the things come out and you're like,

591
00:34:13.400 --> 00:34:14.940
you know, people can't get close to you

592
00:34:14.940 --> 00:34:18.440
because as soon as you feel threatened or triggered,

593
00:34:19.380 --> 00:34:21.139
you go into that response, you know,

594
00:34:21.139 --> 00:34:23.380
and the people get pushed away.

595
00:34:25.139 --> 00:34:27.560
And so what I want to kind of present to you tonight

596
00:34:27.560 --> 00:34:28.739
as well as this,

597
00:34:31.360 --> 00:34:34.639
not only do some of you struggle to love yourself,

598
00:34:34.639 --> 00:34:37.580
but a lot of you don't even like yourself.

599
00:34:40.719 --> 00:34:44.320
Like, I want you to think about when you are alone,

600
00:34:45.199 --> 00:34:47.800
do you actually enjoy your own company?

601
00:34:49.280 --> 00:34:52.080
And you know, I'm not saying that you just need to be good

602
00:34:52.080 --> 00:34:53.480
with not having a spirit mate.

603
00:34:53.480 --> 00:34:55.239
That's not what I'm saying.

604
00:34:55.239 --> 00:34:57.840
What I'm saying though, is that we need to learn.

605
00:34:57.840 --> 00:34:59.200
I had to learn this.

606
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:07.000
I had to learn and realize that I actually didn't even enjoy my own company.

607
00:35:07.000 --> 00:35:19.000
I liked myself to the best of my ability, but I had so many internal things going on that I literally felt like the room wasn't full if I was there by myself.

608
00:35:19.000 --> 00:35:22.000
Am I making sense to you all?

609
00:35:23.000 --> 00:35:27.000
And so I had to really start looking at, okay, what's going on here?

610
00:35:27.000 --> 00:35:41.000
Why do I feel like less than if there's not a bunch of people here or someone here to make me feel like I'm not alone?

611
00:35:41.000 --> 00:35:46.000
I had to look at the abandonment and the neglect that I went through as a kid.

612
00:35:46.000 --> 00:35:49.000
Helen, that's where it went for me.

613
00:35:49.000 --> 00:35:56.000
The abandonment and the neglect that I experienced as a kid caused me to feel deep loneliness.

614
00:35:56.000 --> 00:36:03.000
And that deep loneliness fed into the lies that I wasn't enough.

615
00:36:03.000 --> 00:36:08.000
And God wanted to set me free from that so that I would actually enjoy my own company.

616
00:36:08.000 --> 00:36:17.000
And then when I would meet somebody else, I wouldn't be coming in like half a broke person walking into a relationship trying to make a relationship whole.

617
00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:20.000
No, I needed to be a whole person.

618
00:36:20.000 --> 00:36:23.000
I didn't have to be perfect. Don't misunderstand me.

619
00:36:23.000 --> 00:36:30.000
I just needed to be healthier and more whole and really learn to embrace how God made me to be.

620
00:36:30.000 --> 00:36:37.000
And so I just started doing like really praying into that, Lord, help me to like myself, help me to have fun.

621
00:36:37.000 --> 00:36:44.000
Like even if nobody else is here, like to laugh and be silly and, you know, just enjoy.

622
00:36:44.000 --> 00:36:53.000
And whatever that looked like, some days it looked like turning on music and dancing around in my kitchen by myself and really liking it.

623
00:36:53.000 --> 00:36:57.000
Like really having fun, genuinely.

624
00:36:57.000 --> 00:37:01.000
Yeah, life is fun with other people around, but you know what?

625
00:37:01.000 --> 00:37:07.000
As soon as we start to live fully ourselves, man, people just get drawn to that.

626
00:37:07.000 --> 00:37:13.000
They get drawn to people that are alive and living and full of life.

627
00:37:14.000 --> 00:37:15.000
All right, I'm going to keep going.

628
00:37:15.000 --> 00:37:19.000
Forgiveness is not a feeling, it's a choice.

629
00:37:19.000 --> 00:37:23.000
Okay, so you might not feel like forgiving, but it's a choice to do so.

630
00:37:23.000 --> 00:37:27.000
And even when you choose to do so, you might not feel a release.

631
00:37:27.000 --> 00:37:30.000
Some of you are going to feel like a weight lift right off you.

632
00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:34.000
And others, you might not feel that right now, but you will at some point.

633
00:37:34.000 --> 00:37:38.000
Okay, so don't get discouraged if you don't feel that right away.

634
00:37:38.000 --> 00:37:41.000
Okay, Ephesians 4.23.

635
00:37:41.000 --> 00:37:45.000
Joey, I love that you laughed at yourself for the first time in a while.

636
00:37:45.000 --> 00:37:46.000
That's awesome.

637
00:37:46.000 --> 00:37:47.000
That's a victory.

638
00:37:47.000 --> 00:37:48.000
That's a win.

639
00:37:48.000 --> 00:37:50.000
I hope that you share about that in the group.

640
00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:53.000
Tell us what happened in the group and what caused you to laugh at yourself.

641
00:37:53.000 --> 00:37:55.000
All right, Ephesians 4.23.

642
00:37:55.000 --> 00:38:00.000
Forgive one another just as God forgave you because of what Christ has done.

643
00:38:00.000 --> 00:38:01.000
Colossians 3.13.

644
00:38:01.000 --> 00:38:08.000
Remember the Lord forgave you, so you must also forgive others.

645
00:38:08.000 --> 00:38:11.000
Forgive all of the characters in the story, including yourself,

646
00:38:11.000 --> 00:38:14.000
which I already touched on a little bit.

647
00:38:14.000 --> 00:38:17.000
Remember that forgiveness happens in layers and healing happens in layers.

648
00:38:17.000 --> 00:38:19.000
I touched on that already.

649
00:38:19.000 --> 00:38:22.000
One of the other things that I want to share, it came up this afternoon.

650
00:38:22.000 --> 00:38:25.000
I felt like it was super significant to mention again tonight,

651
00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:28.000
is that for some of you,

652
00:38:28.000 --> 00:38:32.000
the same guy that I was just sharing about, the girl's dad,

653
00:38:32.000 --> 00:38:36.000
when we would have disagreements, which was like all the time, y'all,

654
00:38:36.000 --> 00:38:39.000
which is not healthy if that's happening,

655
00:38:39.000 --> 00:38:42.000
just tuck that away for later when y'all go back into dating.

656
00:38:42.000 --> 00:38:46.000
If you're fighting all the time, y'all, that's not how it is.

657
00:38:46.000 --> 00:38:48.000
That's not how it's supposed to be.

658
00:38:48.000 --> 00:38:49.000
All right.

659
00:38:49.000 --> 00:38:52.000
But anyways, when there would be these arguments and stuff,

660
00:38:52.000 --> 00:38:56.000
he would say to me a lot, like, you're never willing to forgive.

661
00:38:56.000 --> 00:38:59.000
You're never willing to let it go. Well, here's the reality.

662
00:38:59.000 --> 00:39:02.000
Y'all so much bad stuff happened all the time.

663
00:39:02.000 --> 00:39:05.000
Like it just reopened it every single time.

664
00:39:05.000 --> 00:39:10.000
It wasn't that I wasn't willing to forgive him. That wasn't true.

665
00:39:10.000 --> 00:39:12.000
But it was just perpetual, perpetual,

666
00:39:12.000 --> 00:39:14.000
perpetual over and over and over again.

667
00:39:14.000 --> 00:39:17.000
But he would always try to gaslight me and tell me how I wasn't willing

668
00:39:17.000 --> 00:39:20.000
or able to forgive and all these things.

669
00:39:20.000 --> 00:39:23.000
And the reason I'm bringing that up is because some of you have had

670
00:39:23.000 --> 00:39:26.000
people say stuff like that to you.

671
00:39:26.000 --> 00:39:28.000
That you've not been willing or able to forgive,

672
00:39:28.000 --> 00:39:31.000
but you have been willing.

673
00:39:31.000 --> 00:39:36.000
It's just that, you know, a, again, it happens in layers.

674
00:39:36.000 --> 00:39:38.000
They just don't have a full understanding of how forgiveness actually

675
00:39:38.000 --> 00:39:40.000
works.

676
00:39:40.000 --> 00:39:42.000
And forgiveness. Yeah, we forgive,

677
00:39:42.000 --> 00:39:45.000
but we don't have to keep allowing that toxic person to come in and

678
00:39:45.000 --> 00:39:50.000
keep doing their toxic stuff.

679
00:39:50.000 --> 00:39:59.000
Right.

680
00:39:59.000 --> 00:40:02.000
So some of you need to reject the lie that was spoken over you.

681
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:05.680
are able to forgive. Someone said that over you and then some of you started partnering with that

682
00:40:05.680 --> 00:40:10.400
because you're like, oh my gosh, I haven't been willing to forgive. And then it turned into a

683
00:40:10.400 --> 00:40:16.160
reality for you. And so the more you come out of agreement with those kinds of things, I want you

684
00:40:16.160 --> 00:40:21.040
to also be thinking about in this process, what are some other things that people have spoken

685
00:40:21.040 --> 00:40:28.560
over you that are not truth, but you just received them? You just received them like they were truth

686
00:40:28.560 --> 00:40:33.280
and they cause you to constantly kind of topsy turvy. Like you don't know which way to go and

687
00:40:33.280 --> 00:40:37.280
you don't know who you are because people are saying this one day and you're thinking, oh,

688
00:40:37.280 --> 00:40:40.960
that is true about me. And then the next day, somebody else is saying something else. And

689
00:40:40.960 --> 00:40:45.200
I don't know if you ever feel like that you all, but sometimes even people that love you,

690
00:40:45.920 --> 00:40:52.000
love you, I'm not saying that people mean to hurt us, but man, sometimes people say some stuff and

691
00:40:52.960 --> 00:41:00.320
I'm just like, what? No, that's not true. And sometimes I am like, Lord, okay, will you show

692
00:41:00.320 --> 00:41:04.800
me if there's any truth in what they just said? And if there is truth in what they said, Lord,

693
00:41:04.800 --> 00:41:12.720
help me to heal and come out of that if I need to. And if it's not true, Lord, help me just to

694
00:41:13.440 --> 00:41:20.080
dismiss that and let it go. Which for me, y'all, I struggle. I'm a lot better now,

695
00:41:20.720 --> 00:41:24.800
but I've in my life, I struggled with people pleasing a lot. And so if I think somebody

696
00:41:24.800 --> 00:41:28.480
thinks something negative about me, because if they're saying it, they must think it.

697
00:41:30.960 --> 00:41:36.720
Man, I, I, I process that over and over in my mind and, and I'm like, okay, well, why would

698
00:41:36.720 --> 00:41:41.680
they think this? And what did I do? And what did I say? And y'all, sometimes I'm, it's not that

699
00:41:41.680 --> 00:41:50.160
we've done anything. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes I think we have, but for some of you, literally

700
00:41:50.160 --> 00:41:57.200
people were just saying mean things to you and not using wisdom with their mouth. The tongue is

701
00:41:57.200 --> 00:42:03.920
unruly and full of evil. The Bible says, but why do we then believe everything that someone says

702
00:42:05.200 --> 00:42:07.280
instead of saying, Lord, is this true about me?

703
00:42:07.680 --> 00:42:11.440
So if you're, if you're someone where people have said a lot of hurtful things to you,

704
00:42:12.400 --> 00:42:16.000
I'm going to encourage you, you need to process that. You need to forgive those people

705
00:42:16.960 --> 00:42:22.320
for the things that they said and ask the Lord to show you if in any way, if you've partnered

706
00:42:22.320 --> 00:42:27.280
with those lies that were spoken over you subconsciously, you didn't mean to, but when

707
00:42:27.280 --> 00:42:32.320
they said it, it hurt you, it wounded you. And then you believed the lie and you started living

708
00:42:32.320 --> 00:42:38.560
into that because God wants to invite you out of those, those, uh, declarations over your life

709
00:42:39.120 --> 00:42:42.480
that are not true. All right. A couple other things, and then I'm going to get ready for

710
00:42:42.480 --> 00:42:46.800
breakout. I'm going to talk to you really quickly about the difference between victim,

711
00:42:46.800 --> 00:42:55.840
survivors, and thriving. Victims tend to feel helpless. They blame other people and they focus

712
00:42:56.720 --> 00:43:02.720
on the past. Are you someone that struggles to always focus on the past? Are you someone

713
00:43:02.720 --> 00:43:07.120
that tends to blame other people? And you're not, you never are at fault,

714
00:43:09.440 --> 00:43:14.880
feeling helpless all the time. Like you have no power, you have no ability to change anything.

715
00:43:16.960 --> 00:43:21.680
If so, that means again, now, when I give this information, ladies tonight,

716
00:43:22.480 --> 00:43:28.000
I don't want you allowing the enemy to beat you up with it. Okay. This information is to help you

717
00:43:28.000 --> 00:43:34.560
grow. Okay. So even if you are currently in a victim heart posture with victim mindsets and

718
00:43:34.560 --> 00:43:40.640
mentalities, this is not to shame you. It's to help you so that you have an invitation

719
00:43:40.640 --> 00:43:46.160
to come out of that. Does everyone understand before I keep going? Okay. I want to make sure.

720
00:43:46.640 --> 00:43:53.120
Okay. I want to make sure. All right. Survivors are people that have reclaimed their power.

721
00:43:54.400 --> 00:43:59.040
They take responsibility for choices. They choose to heal, often work on self-care.

722
00:43:59.760 --> 00:44:05.920
They start saying no, they start setting some boundaries, but here's the reality. Survivors,

723
00:44:05.920 --> 00:44:11.760
they continue to live, but a lot of time it's in an, like a mode of existing.

724
00:44:11.840 --> 00:44:16.720
Survivors are great. And back in the day, I can remember like, I'm a survivor, I'm an abuse

725
00:44:16.720 --> 00:44:21.760
survivor. And one time the Holy Spirit convicted me. He's like, no, you're not. I'm like, yeah, I

726
00:44:21.760 --> 00:44:29.920
am. He's like, no, you're an overcomer. There's a difference. There's a difference.

727
00:44:32.080 --> 00:44:37.760
All right. Thriving sounds like this, focused on the future. They have power regarding their

728
00:44:37.920 --> 00:44:43.920
future. They surround themselves with other people who thrive.

729
00:44:46.800 --> 00:44:50.880
Again, thriving, focused on the future. They have power regarding their future,

730
00:44:50.880 --> 00:44:54.480
which means we believe that God has plans to prosper us,

731
00:44:54.480 --> 00:44:59.760
to give us a hope and a future not to harm us. Right? As Jeremiah 29,

732
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:01.560
11, that goes through verse 13.

733
00:45:01.560 --> 00:45:04.800
I kind of skipped down to part of 13 when I just said that.

734
00:45:06.120 --> 00:45:08.240
People that thrive, grow, they develop,

735
00:45:08.240 --> 00:45:10.260
they prosper, they flourish.

736
00:45:14.640 --> 00:45:17.480
So tonight the goal is to help you start coming

737
00:45:17.480 --> 00:45:21.400
more and more out of victim over here

738
00:45:21.400 --> 00:45:25.500
and start moving into thriving little by little by little.

739
00:45:25.500 --> 00:45:27.560
Some of you are like, how do I get there?

740
00:45:27.640 --> 00:45:30.480
Well, I wanna tell you, it's literally daily steps

741
00:45:30.480 --> 00:45:33.360
of healing and process and following

742
00:45:33.360 --> 00:45:34.520
and doing the next best thing

743
00:45:34.520 --> 00:45:37.120
that the Lord leads you to do, sincerely.

744
00:45:37.120 --> 00:45:39.340
And some of you, you might feel like you're thriving

745
00:45:39.340 --> 00:45:41.120
in certain areas of your heart and life

746
00:45:41.120 --> 00:45:44.960
and victim in other areas of your heart and life and mind.

747
00:45:45.880 --> 00:45:50.880
For example, I would say my financial area,

748
00:45:50.900 --> 00:45:52.840
I'm doing a lot better now, praise the Lord,

749
00:45:52.840 --> 00:45:54.960
he's been blessing my life like crazy.

750
00:45:55.400 --> 00:45:58.720
But that was one of the kind of last areas

751
00:45:58.720 --> 00:46:02.740
like I've really had to kind of get that part caught up.

752
00:46:02.740 --> 00:46:04.520
That was kind of lagging behind a little bit

753
00:46:04.520 --> 00:46:07.300
for a while there in victim mode.

754
00:46:07.300 --> 00:46:10.160
But the more healing I received,

755
00:46:10.160 --> 00:46:12.040
the more revelation I started getting,

756
00:46:12.040 --> 00:46:15.400
the less that I believed limiting beliefs and mindsets

757
00:46:15.400 --> 00:46:18.640
and the more that I started receiving heavenly perspectives.

758
00:46:19.560 --> 00:46:21.300
And the more that I received the things

759
00:46:21.300 --> 00:46:24.080
and thoughts of heaven, remember his kingdom come here

760
00:46:24.080 --> 00:46:28.300
on earth as it is in heaven, this day, every day,

761
00:46:29.160 --> 00:46:31.400
that we would be transformed by the renewing of our mind,

762
00:46:31.400 --> 00:46:32.720
that all things would pass away,

763
00:46:32.720 --> 00:46:35.040
behold, everything would become new.

764
00:46:35.040 --> 00:46:36.960
God wants to take you towards the new.

765
00:46:38.880 --> 00:46:42.540
Isaiah 43, 19, I'm doing something new.

766
00:46:42.540 --> 00:46:45.760
I'm gonna paraphrase this, don't you perceive it?

767
00:46:45.760 --> 00:46:48.920
I'm about to bring some springs in the wasteland

768
00:46:48.920 --> 00:46:51.880
and streams in the desert, like all that barren stuff,

769
00:46:51.880 --> 00:46:53.680
I'm about to do something new.

770
00:46:55.080 --> 00:46:58.000
So where you felt dead, where you felt like there's no hope,

771
00:46:58.000 --> 00:46:59.520
where God, where the, excuse me,

772
00:46:59.520 --> 00:47:01.200
the enemy is trying to convince you

773
00:47:01.200 --> 00:47:03.240
that nothing's gonna be different,

774
00:47:03.240 --> 00:47:07.000
not even through the hard work, you've done this before.

775
00:47:07.000 --> 00:47:10.560
He's always trying to convince you that God's a trickster,

776
00:47:10.560 --> 00:47:11.760
that he's not good.

777
00:47:13.400 --> 00:47:15.920
You're here by divine assignment.

778
00:47:18.240 --> 00:47:22.920
Do you believe that, that God divinely drew you here?

779
00:47:23.200 --> 00:47:24.840
Well, if that's the case, guess what?

780
00:47:24.840 --> 00:47:27.420
That means he's setting you up for success.

781
00:47:29.000 --> 00:47:31.360
But it's whether or not you choose to believe that

782
00:47:31.360 --> 00:47:32.520
and partner with that.

783
00:47:33.560 --> 00:47:36.360
Y'all, this is a moment by moment thing sometimes,

784
00:47:36.360 --> 00:47:38.600
the partnering with God in our minds.

785
00:47:39.560 --> 00:47:43.440
Lord, I believe, help my unbelief.

786
00:47:43.440 --> 00:47:44.760
Get comfortable with that.

787
00:47:47.040 --> 00:47:49.960
I believe, help my unbelief.

788
00:47:49.960 --> 00:47:53.360
The man in the Bible who was literally his,

789
00:47:53.360 --> 00:47:55.480
I think his daughter was dying

790
00:47:57.840 --> 00:48:00.000
and he's meeting with Jesus

791
00:48:00.000 --> 00:48:03.000
and he knows that Jesus can't come to where he's at.

792
00:48:04.480 --> 00:48:06.720
And he's saying, I believe, help my unbelief.

793
00:48:06.720 --> 00:48:07.960
About what?

794
00:48:07.960 --> 00:48:10.440
That Jesus can heal his daughter.

795
00:48:13.280 --> 00:48:15.520
Jesus died on the cross for you to have victory

796
00:48:15.520 --> 00:48:17.080
in every area of your life.

797
00:48:18.060 --> 00:48:19.780
Are you ready for the upgrade?

798
00:48:20.800 --> 00:48:23.640
Are you really ready to apply the blood of Jesus Christ,

799
00:48:23.640 --> 00:48:27.200
the power and the blood of Jesus Christ

800
00:48:27.200 --> 00:48:29.840
to every area of your mind and your situation?

801
00:48:33.160 --> 00:48:35.240
Tonight, the upgrade's available.

802
00:48:35.240 --> 00:48:36.880
It's time for us to step into it.

803
00:48:36.880 --> 00:48:38.800
A couple more things about thriving.

804
00:48:40.760 --> 00:48:42.600
Thriving might sound like this.

805
00:48:42.600 --> 00:48:44.920
Here's some choices to make about thriving.

806
00:48:44.920 --> 00:48:46.200
What do you wanna do?

807
00:48:47.160 --> 00:48:50.560
How do you wanna experience the world in the days to come?

808
00:48:52.100 --> 00:48:54.040
Like last night, one of the things the Holy Spirit

809
00:48:54.040 --> 00:48:56.940
had me say is what kind of friend do you wanna be?

810
00:48:56.940 --> 00:48:58.560
Not just what kind of friends do you want,

811
00:48:58.560 --> 00:49:00.660
but what kind of friend do you want to be?

812
00:49:02.200 --> 00:49:05.280
And then start moving towards that as God leads you

813
00:49:05.280 --> 00:49:08.260
and trust that God is going to send you friends.

814
00:49:09.120 --> 00:49:11.680
Even when we don't see them in the physical realm, ladies,

815
00:49:11.680 --> 00:49:14.140
we have to partner with the truth.

816
00:49:14.140 --> 00:49:17.180
God is on our side and he wants us to be surrounded

817
00:49:17.180 --> 00:49:19.260
by good people in community.

818
00:49:19.260 --> 00:49:23.220
He says in Psalm 68, six, that he will take the lonely,

819
00:49:23.220 --> 00:49:25.440
the solitary, and he'll place them in family.

820
00:49:25.440 --> 00:49:27.840
Well, why would it say that if that's not true?

821
00:49:30.220 --> 00:49:33.640
I promise I face some of the same things y'all face.

822
00:49:33.640 --> 00:49:35.880
We moved to Florida last year.

823
00:49:35.880 --> 00:49:37.460
We've been here a year now.

824
00:49:37.460 --> 00:49:39.300
You moved to a brand new space and place.

825
00:49:39.300 --> 00:49:40.140
Guess what?

826
00:49:40.140 --> 00:49:43.180
You don't have automatic friends there with you.

827
00:49:43.180 --> 00:49:44.780
All my friends live far away.

828
00:49:44.780 --> 00:49:47.280
The ones that I would normally have spent time with.

829
00:49:47.280 --> 00:49:48.120
So guess what?

830
00:49:48.120 --> 00:49:50.140
I got to make some new friends.

831
00:49:50.140 --> 00:49:54.120
But we had to get to know a church and the people here.

832
00:49:54.120 --> 00:49:55.340
And that was kind of priority.

833
00:49:55.340 --> 00:49:59.300
So for the first year, that was a huge focus.

834
00:49:59.300 --> 00:50:00.460
We had to get to know.

835
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.200
know the people that we were gonna minister to.

836
00:50:02.200 --> 00:50:04.320
It doesn't mean I wasn't trying to make friends.

837
00:50:04.320 --> 00:50:05.160
I was praying for that.

838
00:50:05.160 --> 00:50:06.760
We're moving towards that.

839
00:50:06.760 --> 00:50:09.680
We got connected to a network of other pastors

840
00:50:09.680 --> 00:50:11.600
and leaders and ministers.

841
00:50:11.600 --> 00:50:13.140
Because sometimes you just got to run

842
00:50:13.140 --> 00:50:15.720
with a pack of people that can get you.

843
00:50:15.720 --> 00:50:17.100
They understand you.

844
00:50:20.200 --> 00:50:23.400
But I haven't been able to invest in that a whole lot.

845
00:50:23.400 --> 00:50:25.080
But in this next year, you better believe

846
00:50:25.080 --> 00:50:27.400
that's gonna be one of my top focuses.

847
00:50:27.400 --> 00:50:29.920
Cultivating friendship.

848
00:50:29.960 --> 00:50:31.600
Because we all need it, you all.

849
00:50:32.880 --> 00:50:33.800
We all need it.

850
00:50:34.960 --> 00:50:37.000
So one of the ways that I want to experience

851
00:50:37.000 --> 00:50:39.880
the world in this next year is I want to feel

852
00:50:39.880 --> 00:50:43.080
divine healing and connection and friendships.

853
00:50:43.080 --> 00:50:46.020
And I'm believing for that and I'm praying for that.

854
00:50:46.020 --> 00:50:47.520
How will you act?

855
00:50:47.520 --> 00:50:49.860
What is your attitude gonna be?

856
00:50:51.520 --> 00:50:54.120
When things present themselves, are you gonna choose

857
00:50:54.120 --> 00:50:56.120
to just keep partnering with anger?

858
00:50:56.120 --> 00:50:57.840
Y'all, I know it can be really hard

859
00:50:57.840 --> 00:51:00.000
to get in control of our emotions.

860
00:51:00.000 --> 00:51:02.640
You know, again, I struggle with stuff too.

861
00:51:02.640 --> 00:51:06.920
But the reality is the fruit of the spirit is self-control.

862
00:51:06.920 --> 00:51:08.760
It's one of the fruits of the spirit.

863
00:51:11.280 --> 00:51:14.300
Let's start coming out of alignment

864
00:51:14.300 --> 00:51:16.640
with all the angry things that we think about.

865
00:51:17.880 --> 00:51:20.080
The enemy's assaulting our minds all the time.

866
00:51:20.080 --> 00:51:22.720
He's just sending stuff one after another after another,

867
00:51:22.720 --> 00:51:27.140
trying to convince us that something's not good.

868
00:51:27.180 --> 00:51:28.500
That this is going bad.

869
00:51:28.500 --> 00:51:29.880
And you all, these are real things.

870
00:51:29.880 --> 00:51:32.780
Like my spiritual daughters aren't doing so great.

871
00:51:32.780 --> 00:51:33.740
They're not.

872
00:51:33.740 --> 00:51:35.140
It's really hard.

873
00:51:35.140 --> 00:51:38.020
Their dad and their mom, they're super broken people.

874
00:51:38.020 --> 00:51:40.040
I'm praying for healing for them.

875
00:51:41.620 --> 00:51:43.820
But it's hard to watch my girls go through things

876
00:51:43.820 --> 00:51:45.180
that they're going through.

877
00:51:46.540 --> 00:51:50.640
So in the physical realm, I see not healthy things

878
00:51:50.640 --> 00:51:54.020
happening there, but I am not going to allow that

879
00:51:54.020 --> 00:51:56.740
to cause me to believe for one second

880
00:51:57.300 --> 00:51:59.380
that as for me and my house, they will serve the Lord.

881
00:51:59.380 --> 00:52:01.700
My girls are going to live a healthy life.

882
00:52:01.700 --> 00:52:03.700
The same way that I could choose healing,

883
00:52:03.700 --> 00:52:05.500
I believe they can choose it too.

884
00:52:06.660 --> 00:52:09.260
And it's just until that day comes.

885
00:52:09.260 --> 00:52:10.100
Yet.

886
00:52:11.100 --> 00:52:12.260
Yet.

887
00:52:12.260 --> 00:52:14.900
Some of y'all haven't met your spirit mates yet,

888
00:52:15.820 --> 00:52:16.860
but it's coming.

889
00:52:16.860 --> 00:52:18.260
It's coming.

890
00:52:18.260 --> 00:52:21.820
Last one, where do you want to focus your resources?

891
00:52:22.760 --> 00:52:24.860
What kind of opportunities do you want to create

892
00:52:24.860 --> 00:52:26.460
for yourself in the future?

893
00:52:27.180 --> 00:52:28.380
Again, some of you, this might feel far off

894
00:52:28.380 --> 00:52:29.660
from where you're at right now,

895
00:52:29.660 --> 00:52:32.380
because that's the land of thriving.

896
00:52:32.380 --> 00:52:35.460
People that thrive are thinking about those things.

897
00:52:37.460 --> 00:52:41.480
Y'all, Brian and I are always talking about the future.

898
00:52:41.480 --> 00:52:43.540
We're always talking about what's something

899
00:52:43.540 --> 00:52:44.420
that we can create?

900
00:52:44.420 --> 00:52:45.720
What's something that we can do?

901
00:52:45.720 --> 00:52:47.980
What's something that we can help people

902
00:52:47.980 --> 00:52:49.120
know more about Jesus?

903
00:52:49.120 --> 00:52:52.100
Like we're talking about this stuff on a regular basis.

904
00:52:52.100 --> 00:52:53.940
And I'm not patting myself on the back.

905
00:52:53.940 --> 00:52:55.600
Y'all, it took a lot to get here.

906
00:52:56.580 --> 00:52:59.680
I'm just letting you know that you can get here too.

907
00:52:59.680 --> 00:53:01.380
And it's not like we've arrived.

908
00:53:01.380 --> 00:53:03.380
Y'all, I'm just saying, we're on our way.

909
00:53:03.380 --> 00:53:06.100
We're on our way and we want to take people with us.

910
00:53:06.100 --> 00:53:08.200
And so that's why I'm taking this extra time

911
00:53:08.200 --> 00:53:11.540
to talk through victim, survivor, and thriving tonight.

912
00:53:13.020 --> 00:53:14.900
It's not too far off for you.

913
00:53:16.820 --> 00:53:18.940
It's not, all right?

914
00:53:18.940 --> 00:53:23.940
Okay, we're gonna talk very quickly tonight about stressors.

915
00:53:24.340 --> 00:53:25.700
I want you to know that stressors

916
00:53:25.740 --> 00:53:27.140
are still gonna come into your life.

917
00:53:27.140 --> 00:53:29.180
You're gonna feel things happen.

918
00:53:29.180 --> 00:53:31.060
And when stressors come,

919
00:53:31.060 --> 00:53:34.280
there's a difference between reacting and responding.

920
00:53:34.280 --> 00:53:35.660
I'm gonna read a scripture to you

921
00:53:35.660 --> 00:53:37.500
and then we're literally gonna go into breakouts

922
00:53:37.500 --> 00:53:38.340
right after that.

923
00:53:39.300 --> 00:53:41.460
This is what it says, life by the spirit.

924
00:53:42.360 --> 00:53:45.940
This is from Galatians chapter five, verses 11 through 22.

925
00:53:45.940 --> 00:53:47.340
And I'm gonna read it really quick.

926
00:53:47.340 --> 00:53:49.940
You, my brothers and sisters were called to be free,

927
00:53:49.940 --> 00:53:52.060
but do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh.

928
00:53:52.060 --> 00:53:54.320
Rather serve one another humbly in love

929
00:53:54.320 --> 00:53:56.960
for the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command

930
00:53:56.960 --> 00:53:59.320
love your neighbor as yourself.

931
00:53:59.320 --> 00:54:00.880
If you bite and devour each other,

932
00:54:00.880 --> 00:54:04.080
watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.

933
00:54:04.080 --> 00:54:05.560
So I say, walk by the spirit

934
00:54:05.560 --> 00:54:07.840
and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh

935
00:54:07.840 --> 00:54:10.240
for the flesh desires what is contrary to the spirit

936
00:54:10.240 --> 00:54:12.160
and the spirit, what is contrary to the flesh,

937
00:54:12.160 --> 00:54:14.220
they are in conflict with each other

938
00:54:14.220 --> 00:54:17.040
so that you are not to do whatever you want.

939
00:54:17.040 --> 00:54:20.060
But if you are led by the spirit, you are not under the law.

940
00:54:20.060 --> 00:54:21.600
The acts of the flesh are obvious,

941
00:54:21.600 --> 00:54:23.840
sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery,

942
00:54:23.840 --> 00:54:27.060
idolatry and witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy,

943
00:54:27.060 --> 00:54:29.680
fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions,

944
00:54:29.680 --> 00:54:33.240
factions and envy, drunkenness, orgies in the like.

945
00:54:33.240 --> 00:54:37.080
I warn you as I did before that those who live like this

946
00:54:37.080 --> 00:54:40.560
will not inherit the kingdom of God.

947
00:54:41.600 --> 00:54:46.200
But verse 22, there's a but and 23,

948
00:54:46.200 --> 00:54:50.360
but the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace,

949
00:54:50.400 --> 00:54:53.880
forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,

950
00:54:53.880 --> 00:54:57.280
gentleness, and self control.

951
00:54:57.280 --> 00:55:00.200
Y'all, you can walk in the fruits of the spirit.

952
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:05.000
The Holy Spirit can enable you. I'm about to set the breakout rooms up right now.

953
00:55:05.000 --> 00:55:09.000
Here's the question that you're going to talk about when you go into the breakout room, okay?

954
00:55:09.000 --> 00:55:15.000
And I'll explain for those that aren't quite sure how to get into the breakout room here in just a minute.

955
00:55:15.000 --> 00:55:19.000
Who do you need to forgive tonight and why?

956
00:55:19.000 --> 00:55:21.000
Who do you need to forgive tonight and why?

957
00:55:21.000 --> 00:55:25.000
So when I set these breakout rooms up, they pop up on your screen.

958
00:55:25.000 --> 00:55:27.000
And I'll tell you when it's going to come your way.

959
00:55:27.000 --> 00:55:31.000
And you're just going to click to join that, okay?

960
00:55:31.000 --> 00:55:34.000
I'm getting this set up really quick.

961
00:55:34.000 --> 00:55:36.000
If you can't join the breakout, that's okay.

962
00:55:36.000 --> 00:55:40.000
Now, y'all, if you get into a room and you're sitting there by yourself, kind of hang out for a minute.

963
00:55:40.000 --> 00:55:42.000
Some people's Internet's delayed.

964
00:55:42.000 --> 00:55:46.000
If I see that you're in there by yourself, I will move you.

965
00:55:46.000 --> 00:55:51.000
Now, if you get into a room and there is a person there but they're not talking,

966
00:55:51.000 --> 00:55:55.000
please come back to the main room and tell me that, and I can put you in a different room.

967
00:55:55.000 --> 00:55:58.000
I don't want anyone getting stuck in a room by themselves, okay?

968
00:55:58.000 --> 00:56:02.000
All right.

969
00:56:02.000 --> 00:56:07.000
All right.

970
00:56:07.000 --> 00:56:12.000
I'm going to do short, brief, and powerful, ladies, so keep that in mind.

971
00:56:12.000 --> 00:56:14.000
Make sure everybody in the room has time to talk.

972
00:56:14.000 --> 00:56:18.000
I'm going to do seven minutes, so you've got to be really quick to get in these rooms, all right?

973
00:56:18.000 --> 00:56:19.000
Here you go.

974
00:56:19.000 --> 00:56:20.000
That's up on your screen for you.

975
00:56:20.000 --> 00:56:26.000
Go ahead and click to join those as quick as you can.

976
00:56:26.000 --> 00:56:34.000
And you'll have a timer in your room, so it's going to count down for you.

977
00:56:34.000 --> 00:56:35.000
All right.

978
00:56:35.000 --> 00:56:39.000
As soon as I get these ladies all situated and make sure people all have someone in their room,

979
00:56:39.000 --> 00:57:05.000
I'm going to go ahead and start to pray.

980
00:57:05.000 --> 00:57:07.000
All right.

981
00:57:08.000 --> 00:57:09.000
All right.

982
00:57:09.000 --> 00:57:10.000
Thank you so much for this night.

983
00:57:10.000 --> 00:57:13.000
We thank you, God, for revealings for healing that are happening.

984
00:57:13.000 --> 00:57:18.000
We thank you for transforming our minds, our hearts, our bodies, our souls.

985
00:57:18.000 --> 00:57:21.000
God, that you're turning.

986
00:57:21.000 --> 00:57:23.000
Yeah.

987
00:57:23.000 --> 00:57:24.000
Thank you, Lord.

988
00:57:24.000 --> 00:57:28.000
I don't know why, but this scripture just came up, you know, how Jesus turned the water into wine.

989
00:57:28.000 --> 00:57:30.000
It was his first miracle.

990
00:57:30.000 --> 00:57:33.000
And I feel like that's significant a little bit tonight.

991
00:57:33.000 --> 00:57:35.000
So Lord, we just thank you that you're the miracle worker.

992
00:57:35.000 --> 00:57:41.000
Even where we don't see a way, God, we thank you that you're always working behind the scenes.

993
00:57:41.000 --> 00:57:45.000
We thank you, God, that you would help increase our faith.

994
00:57:45.000 --> 00:57:51.000
Yeah, Lord, we just ask you to breathe life and truth and healing into us.

995
00:57:51.000 --> 00:57:54.000
Help us to hear what your spirit is saying.

996
00:57:54.000 --> 00:57:58.000
God, we thank you that you would protect us from any onslaught of the enemy.

997
00:57:58.000 --> 00:58:03.000
When the enemy comes in like a flood, God, we thank you that you raise up a standard against him

998
00:58:03.000 --> 00:58:06.000
and that you cause him to flee seven ways.

999
00:58:06.000 --> 00:58:10.000
We thank you, God, that our latter years are going to be greater than our former years.

1000
00:58:10.000 --> 00:58:12.000
And I thank you for the truth of that.

1001
00:58:12.000 --> 00:58:16.000
And we thank you, Lord, that you would help us to be a people that would live for you,

1002
00:58:16.000 --> 00:58:20.000
that we would walk in pathways of righteousness for your name's sake,

1003
00:58:20.000 --> 00:58:25.000
and that we would choose to repent and turn away from things that are not of you, Lord.

1004
00:58:25.000 --> 00:58:28.000
Things that don't look like you, that don't sound like you.

1005
00:58:28.000 --> 00:58:31.000
The things that I read even in that scripture,

1006
00:58:31.000 --> 00:58:37.000
that we would turn away from lifestyles of sin and wrong thinking, unhealthy thoughts and patterns, God,

1007
00:58:37.000 --> 00:58:41.000
and we would turn towards the fullness of your presence and your spirit.

1008
00:58:41.000 --> 00:58:49.000
God, we thank you that, yes, Lord, your word declares that you will hide us under the shadow of your wings

1009
00:58:49.000 --> 00:58:56.000
and in the presence of the Almighty, Lord, where the enemy has been really wreaking havoc against some of us.

1010
00:58:56.000 --> 00:59:02.000
We just thank you that you would help them to feel your presence in a supernatural way tonight.

1011
00:59:02.000 --> 00:59:08.000
We thank you, God, that you would surround them with, yes, Lord.

1012
00:59:08.000 --> 00:59:14.000
I just heard songs of praise that even the Lord would worship and dance over you.

1013
00:59:14.000 --> 00:59:19.000
In Zephaniah 3, 17, it talks about how he'll rejoice over us with singing.

1014
00:59:19.000 --> 00:59:25.000
Have y'all ever thought about that, the power of just the truth that God rejoices over us?

1015
00:59:25.000 --> 00:59:28.000
That he's singing over you right now?

1016
00:59:28.000 --> 00:59:30.000
He wants you to be set free.

1017
00:59:30.000 --> 00:59:35.000
He wants you to walk out of the prison and the cage and the places where you've been bound in the past,

1018
00:59:35.000 --> 00:59:37.000
that he's the bondage breaker.

1019
00:59:37.000 --> 00:59:42.000
And so tonight, we just thank you, Lord, that your truth would come and prevail in our hearts,

1020
00:59:42.000 --> 00:59:48.000
our minds, our bodies, our spirits, and our souls, that your truth is what sets us free.

1021
00:59:48.000 --> 00:59:52.000
Yes, Lord, help us to come out of stinking thinking.

1022
00:59:52.000 --> 00:59:59.000
Any ways where we are just caught in negative cycles and patterns in our minds, suspicion.

1023
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:11.000
Things that aren't of you, Lord. We thank you, God, that you're just coming in and bringing life and truth and hope and joy unspeakable and full of glory can be ours.

1024
01:00:11.000 --> 01:00:16.000
We thank you, Lord. Let's see, what scripture is this? I'm going to read this Colossians.

1025
01:00:16.000 --> 01:00:19.000
Oh, I started reading this earlier. We'll go ahead and read the full version.

1026
01:00:19.000 --> 01:00:24.000
And this is the message version, Colossians 3.13, but it's also going to be verse 14 as well.

1027
01:00:24.000 --> 01:00:31.000
So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you.

1028
01:00:31.000 --> 01:00:40.000
Compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline, be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense.

1029
01:00:40.000 --> 01:00:48.000
Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you, and regardless of what else you put on, wear love.

1030
01:00:48.000 --> 01:00:53.000
It's your basic all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

1031
01:00:53.000 --> 01:00:58.000
Wow, Lord, I thank you that you would cloak us in your love tonight.

1032
01:00:58.000 --> 01:01:02.000
I thank you, God, that you would help us to become more rooted and grounded in your love.

1033
01:01:02.000 --> 01:01:08.000
We know that your love is what casts out all fear because fear has to do with torment.

1034
01:01:08.000 --> 01:01:11.000
But when we're rooted in your love, Lord, that changes everything.

1035
01:01:11.000 --> 01:01:15.000
God, when you come on the scene, everything changes.

1036
01:01:15.000 --> 01:01:21.000
Yeah, Lord, thank you for the reality and the reminder that Jesus, you set us free.

1037
01:01:21.000 --> 01:01:25.000
That when you walk into the room, everything changes.

1038
01:01:25.000 --> 01:01:30.000
And we pause and we stand in awe and wonder of your majesty, of your goodness.

1039
01:01:30.000 --> 01:01:39.000
Yeah, Neo, that was Colossians, excuse me, 3.13 and 14 in the message translation, just so you know.

1040
01:01:39.000 --> 01:01:43.000
Oh, I love this scripture too. I used to pray this a lot.

1041
01:01:43.000 --> 01:01:46.000
Maybe I need to pray it a lot again.

1042
01:01:46.000 --> 01:01:48.000
Psalm 51.10 says this,

1043
01:01:53.000 --> 01:02:02.000
Father, we just ask you to come in and remove all the debris, remove all the darkness, Lord, that you would remove the gunk.

1044
01:02:02.000 --> 01:02:05.000
I'm just seeing kind of like a sludge, a black sludge.

1045
01:02:05.000 --> 01:02:09.000
Lord, we just thank you that you would just come in and rinse all that out.

1046
01:02:09.000 --> 01:02:14.000
Lord, we thank you that where we've been crimson red in the past, Lord, you make us white as snow.

1047
01:02:14.000 --> 01:02:19.000
God, we thank you for healing us from the inside out and that you're liberating us.

1048
01:02:19.000 --> 01:02:25.000
God, we thank you, God, that even while we sleep, that you would give us Salem rest,

1049
01:02:25.000 --> 01:02:33.000
that we would have dreams and visions of you, God, that you would meet us in the night hour to bring healing and resurrection power and life.

1050
01:02:33.000 --> 01:02:37.000
God, we thank you that you administer to us in every way.

1051
01:02:37.000 --> 01:02:41.000
Romans 8.28 in the Passion Translation says this.

1052
01:02:56.000 --> 01:03:02.000
God, we thank you for the designed and divine purpose that you have for us.

1053
01:03:02.000 --> 01:03:07.000
God, we thank you that you would help us to lay aside every weight that so easily ensnares us,

1054
01:03:07.000 --> 01:03:11.000
that we would press on toward the high calling of God for our lives.

1055
01:03:11.000 --> 01:03:18.000
Yes, Lord. Yes, Lord, help us to lay down the baggage, the luggage we've been carrying around,

1056
01:03:18.000 --> 01:03:25.000
the bitterness, the unforgiveness, again, the pain of the past, shame, guilt, condemnation,

1057
01:03:25.000 --> 01:03:28.000
that we would lay all those things down and allow you to fill us,

1058
01:03:28.000 --> 01:03:32.000
fill us to overflowing with your truth, with your life, with your goodness.

1059
01:03:32.000 --> 01:03:37.000
Isaiah 61.3 says to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes.

1060
01:03:37.000 --> 01:03:42.000
God, we thank you that every area that's felt broken, that's felt barren,

1061
01:03:42.000 --> 01:03:46.000
that's felt like there's ash and just burnt up heartache.

1062
01:03:46.000 --> 01:03:50.000
Lord, we thank you that you bring beauty into all of those places, Lord,

1063
01:03:50.000 --> 01:03:54.000
and that you make them as if they never happened.

1064
01:03:54.000 --> 01:03:58.000
We thank you, God, that you're continuing to grow us through the power of your Holy Spirit.

1065
01:03:58.000 --> 01:04:03.000
We thank you that in 1 Peter 5.8, it does tell us to stay alert.

1066
01:04:03.000 --> 01:04:05.000
Watch out for your great enemy, the devil.

1067
01:04:05.000 --> 01:04:11.000
He prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.

1068
01:04:11.000 --> 01:04:14.000
He's not a lion. He's not the lion of the tribe of Judah.

1069
01:04:14.000 --> 01:04:17.000
He prowls around like a lion.

1070
01:04:17.000 --> 01:04:22.000
He's imitation, y'all. He's second class.

1071
01:04:23.000 --> 01:04:26.000
When we hear those kind of things, when the enemy's prowling around,

1072
01:04:26.000 --> 01:04:30.000
let us ask God to give us revelation and enlightenment

1073
01:04:30.000 --> 01:04:33.000
so that we can partner with the truth in Jesus' name.

1074
01:04:33.000 --> 01:04:37.000
Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back.

1075
01:04:37.000 --> 01:04:40.000
That's okay, Mandy. It happens sometimes.

1076
01:04:40.000 --> 01:04:43.000
All right, so this is what we do for all of our new ladies.

1077
01:04:43.000 --> 01:04:46.000
Now that you've come back, we do group coaching right now.

1078
01:04:46.000 --> 01:04:48.000
So anyone that's willing to share with the whole group.

1079
01:04:48.000 --> 01:04:51.000
And ladies, when we share, try to keep it short, brief, and powerful,

1080
01:04:51.000 --> 01:04:53.000
but I try to do my best to do the same in coaching

1081
01:04:53.000 --> 01:04:56.000
so that we can get multiple people in here tonight.

1082
01:04:56.000 --> 01:04:58.000
Mandy, go ahead and kick us off. Thank you for that.

1083
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:09.000
Okay.

1084
01:05:09.000 --> 01:05:11.000
I'm so sorry. I can get unmuted. Okay.

1085
01:05:11.000 --> 01:05:15.000
It's totally fine.

1086
01:05:15.000 --> 01:05:17.000
Okay. So of course, like the one day I don't wear makeup.

1087
01:05:17.000 --> 01:05:18.000
This is when I feel led to share.

1088
01:05:18.000 --> 01:05:22.000
Thank you.

1089
01:05:22.000 --> 01:05:29.000
Okay. So I accidentally exited out and I just like.

1090
01:05:29.000 --> 01:05:30.000
I don't know.

1091
01:05:30.000 --> 01:05:31.000
I don't know.

1092
01:05:31.000 --> 01:05:32.000
I don't know.

1093
01:05:32.000 --> 01:05:33.000
I'm going through.

1094
01:05:33.000 --> 01:05:34.000
This is really hard for me.

1095
01:05:34.000 --> 01:05:40.000
This whole friend thing.

1096
01:05:40.000 --> 01:05:42.000
So I'll try to be really short, long story short.

1097
01:05:42.000 --> 01:05:44.000
I had two best friends that I was in ministry with.

1098
01:05:44.000 --> 01:05:45.000
We did ministry for three years.

1099
01:05:45.000 --> 01:05:46.000
And they were twins.

1100
01:05:46.000 --> 01:05:50.000
So we hung out all the time and I realized with their friendship,

1101
01:05:50.000 --> 01:05:53.000
I became very isolated and lost a lot of other friends.

1102
01:05:53.000 --> 01:05:55.000
I've always had tons of women around me.

1103
01:05:55.000 --> 01:05:56.000
That's always been my personality.

1104
01:05:56.000 --> 01:05:59.000
And so, you know, I, I, you know,

1105
01:05:59.000 --> 01:06:02.000
I didn't feel like I belonged to all the things I just felt like.

1106
01:06:02.000 --> 01:06:04.000
This is my tribe, you know?

1107
01:06:04.000 --> 01:06:06.000
So I almost like left a lot of people.

1108
01:06:06.000 --> 01:06:13.000
Kind of behind.

1109
01:06:13.000 --> 01:06:16.000
Kind of things that they felt towards other people at our church to

1110
01:06:16.000 --> 01:06:18.000
kind of like tainted my view on others as well.

1111
01:06:18.000 --> 01:06:21.000
Anyway, one of my, one of the sisters,

1112
01:06:21.000 --> 01:06:23.000
her husband suddenly died from an overdose.

1113
01:06:23.000 --> 01:06:25.000
And she decided to, well, I don't.

1114
01:06:25.000 --> 01:06:28.000
She was 15 years younger than her.

1115
01:06:28.000 --> 01:06:32.000
So it was a really odd situation.

1116
01:06:32.000 --> 01:06:35.000
She told my brother how much she loved him.

1117
01:06:35.000 --> 01:06:37.000
A day after my grandpa had passed.

1118
01:06:37.000 --> 01:06:40.000
And she felt like it was.

1119
01:06:40.000 --> 01:06:42.000
She was trying to be helpful for him, but really,

1120
01:06:42.000 --> 01:06:44.000
I just felt really betrayed.

1121
01:06:44.000 --> 01:06:53.000
Fast forward a month later.

1122
01:06:53.000 --> 01:06:56.000
And my brother's telling me that he's going to marry my friend.

1123
01:06:56.000 --> 01:06:58.000
And just let me know that.

1124
01:06:58.000 --> 01:07:00.000
So I felt kind of like, I didn't know they were talking.

1125
01:07:00.000 --> 01:07:17.000
I didn't know they had like.

1126
01:07:17.000 --> 01:07:20.000
Did all these, like, you know, just late nights together, all this stuff.

1127
01:07:20.000 --> 01:07:22.000
And so, yeah, anyway, I felt really betrayed.

1128
01:07:22.000 --> 01:07:24.000
And my brother's telling me that he's going to marry my friend.

1129
01:07:24.000 --> 01:07:25.000
And just let me know that.

1130
01:07:25.000 --> 01:07:26.000
He's dating somebody else.

1131
01:07:26.000 --> 01:07:28.000
He's dating somebody else now.

1132
01:07:28.000 --> 01:07:31.000
Never even literally it was like a week after he told everybody.

1133
01:07:31.000 --> 01:07:34.000
He would realize how crazy the situation was and.

1134
01:07:34.000 --> 01:07:36.000
Ditched her.

1135
01:07:36.000 --> 01:07:38.000
And I mean, he's a hot mess, which I told her.

1136
01:07:38.000 --> 01:07:45.000
Like, what are you doing?

1137
01:07:45.000 --> 01:07:46.000
But anyway,

1138
01:07:46.000 --> 01:07:50.000
so I'm having a hard time because I just feel like I keep forgiving.

1139
01:07:51.000 --> 01:07:53.000
And I feel like I've always been.

1140
01:07:53.000 --> 01:07:54.000
Foolish for being.

1141
01:07:54.000 --> 01:07:56.000
As her.

1142
01:07:56.000 --> 01:08:03.000
I hindered my trust in women.

1143
01:08:03.000 --> 01:08:06.000
And I've never had trust issues like this and females.

1144
01:08:06.000 --> 01:08:08.000
I feel like I've always just looked at the positive and people.

1145
01:08:08.000 --> 01:08:11.000
And overlooked red flags. I'm really good at doing that.

1146
01:08:11.000 --> 01:08:14.000
So it's just been really hard.

1147
01:08:14.000 --> 01:08:17.000
Tell me more about why you feel foolish. Tell me more about this.

1148
01:08:18.000 --> 01:08:21.000
Yeah, I mean, I, I, I, I.

1149
01:08:21.000 --> 01:08:24.000
I ignore red flags. And I think after.

1150
01:08:24.000 --> 01:08:26.000
Her husband had passed.

1151
01:08:26.000 --> 01:08:30.000
A year and a half into our friendship.

1152
01:08:30.000 --> 01:08:38.000
I just kind of was like, I don't care.

1153
01:08:38.000 --> 01:08:39.000
About the red flags.

1154
01:08:39.000 --> 01:08:42.000
I'm going to have her back and I'm going to be with her because I was,

1155
01:08:42.000 --> 01:08:44.000
I was there the night that her husband.

1156
01:08:44.000 --> 01:08:46.000
So we were actually like on a.

1157
01:08:47.000 --> 01:08:48.000
Yeah.

1158
01:08:48.000 --> 01:08:49.000
Yeah.

1159
01:08:49.000 --> 01:08:50.000
Yeah.

1160
01:08:50.000 --> 01:08:52.000
Yeah. So I don't know. I think it was like,

1161
01:08:52.000 --> 01:08:57.000
I knew there was red flags.

1162
01:08:57.000 --> 01:08:58.000
And I knew there was like brokenness,

1163
01:08:58.000 --> 01:09:00.000
but then it's just one of those things where you're like, Oh,

1164
01:09:00.000 --> 01:09:01.000
we're all broken.

1165
01:09:01.000 --> 01:09:04.000
You know, like, Oh, we all have flaws. So, yeah.

1166
01:09:04.000 --> 01:09:05.000
When you met them.

1167
01:09:05.000 --> 01:09:06.000
Let me ask you.

1168
01:09:06.000 --> 01:09:08.000
If you don't know the answer, it's okay.

1169
01:09:08.000 --> 01:09:09.000
I don't know.

1170
01:09:09.000 --> 01:09:10.000
I don't know.

1171
01:09:10.000 --> 01:09:16.000
I don't know.

1172
01:09:16.000 --> 01:09:18.000
Even if it wasn't from a healthy place,

1173
01:09:18.000 --> 01:09:22.000
but what need and you got filled with these friends?

1174
01:09:22.000 --> 01:09:23.000
Stay.

1175
01:09:23.000 --> 01:09:26.000
So I met him in a woman's small group at our church originally.

1176
01:09:26.000 --> 01:09:28.000
And they do a like.

1177
01:09:28.000 --> 01:09:35.000
Oh, goodness.

1178
01:09:35.000 --> 01:09:37.000
In my opinion, it is new age. And so I've repented for it,

1179
01:09:37.000 --> 01:09:40.000
but it's like wrapped in Christian stuff.

1180
01:09:40.000 --> 01:09:45.000
And so I felt like they could help me.

1181
01:09:45.000 --> 01:09:49.000
With some things I was going through and they kind of reached out to me

1182
01:09:49.000 --> 01:09:51.000
like they could help with some things that my kids,

1183
01:09:51.000 --> 01:09:55.000
my daughter was dealing with at the time.

1184
01:09:55.000 --> 01:09:59.000
Okay. So what I actually hear is that.

1185
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:04.040
in need. And they maybe took advantage of that, actually.

1186
01:10:05.800 --> 01:10:09.120
Yeah. Have you ever realized? I mean, have you ever really

1187
01:10:09.160 --> 01:10:13.560
allowed yourself to see? Not that they preyed on you? I don't

1188
01:10:13.560 --> 01:10:18.320
want it to be that that side of it. But there is a little bit

1189
01:10:18.320 --> 01:10:22.280
here where when I'm asking you, hey, what need did they like

1190
01:10:22.280 --> 01:10:25.680
what? Because typically, when we gravitate towards people like

1191
01:10:25.680 --> 01:10:28.280
that, and then we let go of other friends, even if they're

1192
01:10:28.280 --> 01:10:31.960
healthy friends, there's something going on there where

1193
01:10:31.960 --> 01:10:35.320
we're connecting, and we're getting a need met. And it's

1194
01:10:35.320 --> 01:10:38.240
causing us to get absorbed by that those people. Does that

1195
01:10:38.240 --> 01:10:43.120
make sense? Yeah. And so that's why I asked you that question.

1196
01:10:43.120 --> 01:10:47.960
And so to me, a just, you know, obviously processing forgiving

1197
01:10:47.960 --> 01:10:51.480
yourself, have you have you forgiven yourself for for these

1198
01:10:51.480 --> 01:10:56.240
things? Before I feel I feel like I have, but I don't know

1199
01:10:56.240 --> 01:10:59.760
why these emotions are still attached. I've done unhealthy

1200
01:10:59.800 --> 01:11:04.440
soul ties, severing, like all the things I know how to do. I

1201
01:11:04.440 --> 01:11:07.400
just don't know why. Yeah.

1202
01:11:08.480 --> 01:11:13.640
Maybe part of it is that, you know, even though you feel

1203
01:11:13.640 --> 01:11:16.360
foolish, remember that your feelings don't get to be in the

1204
01:11:16.360 --> 01:11:22.640
driver's seat. Okay. And so really partnering with grace

1205
01:11:22.640 --> 01:11:26.280
towards yourself that you're not foolish, you actually were,

1206
01:11:26.640 --> 01:11:32.000
you were in a place of wanting more healing. And unfortunately,

1207
01:11:32.000 --> 01:11:36.960
you just got connected to a place and people that were not

1208
01:11:36.960 --> 01:11:42.080
maybe the healthiest way to get that to you. Yeah. And so we all

1209
01:11:42.080 --> 01:11:46.800
at times make mistakes. And I think the thing that even on

1210
01:11:46.800 --> 01:11:50.240
that, as soon as I said that is like, it's like you're you don't

1211
01:11:50.240 --> 01:11:54.960
give yourself grace to make a mistake. Yeah. And because this

1212
01:11:54.960 --> 01:11:57.720
one hurts so deeply, that's where that you know, that

1213
01:11:57.720 --> 01:12:00.680
feeling of like, man, there's just a lot of tenderness there.

1214
01:12:00.880 --> 01:12:03.760
And your brother, this and now you and your brother aren't

1215
01:12:03.760 --> 01:12:07.360
talking, you know, there's just there's a lot there. And so I

1216
01:12:07.360 --> 01:12:11.840
think just from my my life journey, those are the kind of

1217
01:12:11.840 --> 01:12:15.800
situations that sometimes it's going to take a few times of

1218
01:12:15.840 --> 01:12:18.960
again, different layers of forgiving different layers of

1219
01:12:18.960 --> 01:12:23.880
healing, that you can give yourself permission to trust

1220
01:12:23.880 --> 01:12:27.320
again, not everybody's going to treat you the way that you were

1221
01:12:27.320 --> 01:12:30.920
treated in this dynamic. The tough part is like, you know,

1222
01:12:30.920 --> 01:12:33.720
you got to get your heart and your mind to line up, but the

1223
01:12:33.720 --> 01:12:36.600
Holy Spirit will help you do that. Yeah, we can't make that

1224
01:12:36.600 --> 01:12:39.560
happen. But it will happen in time. And so I do want to

1225
01:12:39.560 --> 01:12:43.200
encourage you to do forgiveness prayer sheets for both of those

1226
01:12:43.200 --> 01:12:47.800
sisters, even though there was one primary one. Yeah. And

1227
01:12:47.800 --> 01:12:51.280
specifically, you know, make sure you're writing on there

1228
01:12:51.280 --> 01:12:56.320
forgiving her for, you know, things that were said or, you

1229
01:12:56.320 --> 01:13:01.000
know, going to then date your brother, whatever, forgiving

1230
01:13:01.000 --> 01:13:04.080
your brother for dating her, whatever, anybody that's

1231
01:13:04.080 --> 01:13:08.320
connected there, but also for sure doing a sheet for yourself

1232
01:13:08.920 --> 01:13:13.040
and releasing yourself from, you know, this afternoon, I said

1233
01:13:13.040 --> 01:13:16.800
this example that some people have put themselves in prisons,

1234
01:13:17.080 --> 01:13:20.560
and they, they've kind of locked themselves in there. And that's

1235
01:13:20.560 --> 01:13:23.240
coming up, even as I'm talking to you tonight, tonight, like,

1236
01:13:23.240 --> 01:13:26.560
it's like, you're like, there's this subconscious internal

1237
01:13:26.560 --> 01:13:30.600
punishment happening. Does that make sense? And the word is, is

1238
01:13:30.640 --> 01:13:33.920
wanting you to see tonight that the prison like you were never

1239
01:13:33.920 --> 01:13:37.560
supposed to be in there to begin with, but the doors open and

1240
01:13:37.560 --> 01:13:42.040
literally you can walk out. Amen. And the walking out is the

1241
01:13:42.040 --> 01:13:48.400
first step, the feelings will follow later. Yeah. Okay. I'm

1242
01:13:48.400 --> 01:13:52.520
so glad you're, you're welcome. You're welcome. And you know,

1243
01:13:52.520 --> 01:13:57.040
ladies, it's really important to pray and start thanking God for

1244
01:13:57.040 --> 01:14:01.360
sending you healthy friends that walk in all the fruits of the

1245
01:14:01.360 --> 01:14:03.760
spirit before they come. Same thing with your spirit mate.

1246
01:14:04.040 --> 01:14:07.080
God, thank you for sending my spirit mate. Thank you for

1247
01:14:07.080 --> 01:14:09.840
letting him be a man that walks in all the fruits of the spirit.

1248
01:14:10.080 --> 01:14:13.680
Thank you for letting him be a man that, you know, is, is going

1249
01:14:13.680 --> 01:14:15.720
to be highlighted to me and I'm going to be highlighted to him.

1250
01:14:15.720 --> 01:14:18.360
You can pray about that. Even while you're in heartwork, don't

1251
01:14:18.360 --> 01:14:20.520
get so caught on it that you're missing the heartwork and you're

1252
01:14:20.520 --> 01:14:23.760
chasing men right now. But what I am saying is you can pray and

1253
01:14:23.760 --> 01:14:26.880
believe for those things to come before they get here. All right.

1254
01:14:26.920 --> 01:14:30.520
Awesome. Leslie, we'd love to hear what you have to say.

1255
01:14:31.360 --> 01:14:35.440
Okay. Hi. Hi. First of all, where's that forgiveness

1256
01:14:35.440 --> 01:14:37.200
worksheet? Is it in the book?

1257
01:14:37.520 --> 01:14:41.800
Good question. So when y'all go into the last year single app,

1258
01:14:41.840 --> 01:14:45.440
and you go into the welcome section, all of the worksheets

1259
01:14:45.440 --> 01:14:49.120
are there under the welcome section for you. But it is also

1260
01:14:49.120 --> 01:14:53.360
under week four. And ladies who just started, you don't have to

1261
01:14:53.360 --> 01:14:56.640
jump ahead to week four, because there's a lot of work that's

1262
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:03.040
they're under the welcome section for you. That's why we ended up putting them there.

1263
01:15:04.080 --> 01:15:08.720
So yeah, great question. Okay. So another question I have is, do we know

1264
01:15:10.240 --> 01:15:13.760
that we still need to forgive if we're triggered by that person?

1265
01:15:17.760 --> 01:15:23.200
I mean, yeah, sometimes that's going to be the signal for sure. Sometimes though,

1266
01:15:23.200 --> 01:15:27.040
the reason I hesitated is sometimes somebody's going to trigger you,

1267
01:15:28.320 --> 01:15:33.120
but you're actually, you have unforgiveness or wounds that's connected to someone else.

1268
01:15:33.680 --> 01:15:38.720
But something about that person in that situation reminds you of the other stuff.

1269
01:15:40.160 --> 01:15:43.920
Does that make sense? And so really pray, if there's someone that's coming to mind for you,

1270
01:15:43.920 --> 01:15:49.120
pray and ask the Holy Spirit, like, hey, do I need to forgive this person? Is there another

1271
01:15:49.120 --> 01:15:56.720
area that I need to process and heal and forgive them and release them? Or did I get triggered,

1272
01:15:56.720 --> 01:16:02.800
Lord? Because it reminds me of something else that's happened in my life. Like just ask the

1273
01:16:02.800 --> 01:16:06.480
Lord. And I typically even ask the Lord, if I get offended at people, I'll say, Lord,

1274
01:16:06.480 --> 01:16:15.520
why is this offending me? I just ask him and he shows me normally. Yeah. Good question.

1275
01:16:16.080 --> 01:16:23.600
Very good question. Yeah. I would say my forgiveness that I need probably more layers is

1276
01:16:24.720 --> 01:16:31.600
with my mom because I moved in with her two years ago and to help take care of her. She's 86. And

1277
01:16:34.400 --> 01:16:42.000
normally I'm doing okay and able to set boundaries with her. But recently I kind of lost my cool,

1278
01:16:42.560 --> 01:16:52.400
became spoke more aggressively than assertively. And it's it, you know, came but went back to

1279
01:16:52.400 --> 01:16:58.400
feeling not good enough, feeling inadequate, defective, you know, all of those things that

1280
01:16:58.400 --> 01:17:06.560
I felt growing up. So. Okay, that's very specific things that you felt growing up.

1281
01:17:06.560 --> 01:17:10.640
So that tells me that there's some things from when you grew up that still needs some

1282
01:17:10.640 --> 01:17:18.080
healing and some attention. Okay. And, and I will say it's, it's not shocking to me that,

1283
01:17:18.080 --> 01:17:20.480
you know, you're living with mom and now you're getting triggered

1284
01:17:21.120 --> 01:17:25.280
and has the triggering accelerated since you began the heartwork.

1285
01:17:26.880 --> 01:17:33.840
Yes. Yes. And you know what I thought was really cool. The biggest supernatural thing that I

1286
01:17:33.840 --> 01:17:40.240
noticed since I started the heartwork is I didn't even know that I needed my heart softened.

1287
01:17:40.240 --> 01:17:46.400
And as it softened, then things bother me more because I don't have that shell. Yes.

1288
01:17:47.280 --> 01:17:51.120
Where I normally I can just be like, Oh, and set a boundary this time. I was like,

1289
01:17:53.440 --> 01:17:57.600
Yes. And Leslie, you're touching on something that's really important ladies. I hope that

1290
01:17:57.600 --> 01:18:03.520
you're paying attention to what she's saying. As you're healing your heart, the callousness

1291
01:18:03.520 --> 01:18:08.240
in that hard outer shell, that's going to start to come off. And so there are going to be times

1292
01:18:08.240 --> 01:18:11.280
where you're going to be like, Whoa, you're going to have all these emotions and you're

1293
01:18:11.280 --> 01:18:15.520
going to feel all this stuff. Some of you have been numb for a really long time. So

1294
01:18:16.320 --> 01:18:21.680
yeah, there's going to come a balancing though. There will, you'll rebalance as you continue to

1295
01:18:21.680 --> 01:18:27.440
heal and process, but you are going to have things like be like highlighted to you that you haven't

1296
01:18:27.440 --> 01:18:33.040
seen before. All right. And so that's why I like, as soon as you said that, like things from when

1297
01:18:33.040 --> 01:18:39.120
you were younger are now percolating to the surface here because of what's being triggered.

1298
01:18:39.120 --> 01:18:45.360
Okay. And so that's where you can write. Then that's a signal that the stuff from when you're

1299
01:18:45.360 --> 01:18:51.120
younger, God wants to put some attention there with you. He wants to come in and heal that stuff.

1300
01:18:51.120 --> 01:18:55.920
And so any, whatever's coming up, I encourage you to process that with the Lord. You might need to

1301
01:18:55.920 --> 01:18:59.840
do forgiveness sheets for some of those things. You might need to ask the Lord for further

1302
01:18:59.840 --> 01:19:05.200
revelation on it. Are there any dots he wants to connect for you to help? You know, it like,

1303
01:19:05.840 --> 01:19:11.600
what's going to help you step into healing and releasing that person or those situations or

1304
01:19:12.240 --> 01:19:17.280
hearing what is he saying to you in the midst of that situation versus what that person was saying.

1305
01:19:19.280 --> 01:19:25.680
Does that make sense? Yes. Great question. Lots of great questions. You guys are doing great. Thank

1306
01:19:25.680 --> 01:19:29.280
you so much for sharing Leslie. Karen, go ahead.

1307
01:19:36.320 --> 01:19:41.680
Sorry. Am I the Karen? I guess I'm the only Karen. I'm sorry. I should have said your last name.

1308
01:19:41.680 --> 01:19:49.280
It's okay. It's hard to say. It's okay. No problem. Yeah. I am. I love how the Lord is bringing stuff

1309
01:19:49.280 --> 01:19:55.200
up as I'm doing this. Okay. I'm just, I've had decades of the Lord leading and inner healing,

1310
01:19:55.200 --> 01:20:00.080
and I'm fine. Whatever, God. So the main thing the Lord's been leading me.

1311
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:03.080
to deal with first, before any kind of spirit-made thing,

1312
01:20:03.080 --> 01:20:08.080
is it basically is continuing to...

1313
01:20:10.360 --> 01:20:12.880
Really, it's about speaking the truth in love

1314
01:20:12.880 --> 01:20:15.200
with some senior leaders at my church,

1315
01:20:15.200 --> 01:20:19.200
where there's been dominating,

1316
01:20:20.120 --> 01:20:22.960
and more recently, a controlling behavior,

1317
01:20:22.960 --> 01:20:27.920
which I've said no to in different ways,

1318
01:20:27.920 --> 01:20:29.840
but bringing full resolve there.

1319
01:20:29.840 --> 01:20:31.680
And the Lord has been leading me in it.

1320
01:20:31.680 --> 01:20:33.160
There's been good fruit,

1321
01:20:33.160 --> 01:20:36.040
but what something that came up just Monday,

1322
01:20:36.040 --> 01:20:38.520
a week ago Monday, I had...

1323
01:20:38.520 --> 01:20:39.760
So I'm dealing with a lot.

1324
01:20:39.760 --> 01:20:43.600
I had a dream that helped me see something

1325
01:20:43.600 --> 01:20:45.320
that I didn't see inside me,

1326
01:20:45.320 --> 01:20:49.040
a part of me that felt so much pain about them.

1327
01:20:49.040 --> 01:20:50.660
And it was basically,

1328
01:20:52.360 --> 01:20:54.920
it was like I knew I couldn't take it out on them,

1329
01:20:54.920 --> 01:20:57.560
so I was gonna take it out on me.

1330
01:20:57.560 --> 01:21:01.440
And I woke up with that, and I went, okay, Lord, help.

1331
01:21:01.440 --> 01:21:04.120
And I did something called internal family systems.

1332
01:21:04.120 --> 01:21:05.400
The Lord's taught me.

1333
01:21:05.400 --> 01:21:08.360
It's like being aware of different parts inside me,

1334
01:21:08.360 --> 01:21:11.160
and asking Jesus to come help and heal.

1335
01:21:11.160 --> 01:21:13.280
So the Lord led me in that.

1336
01:21:13.280 --> 01:21:14.520
I've been in a process.

1337
01:21:14.520 --> 01:21:17.560
The next morning, I came to peace.

1338
01:21:17.560 --> 01:21:20.440
Next morning, I was angry,

1339
01:21:20.440 --> 01:21:23.040
and I did anger work and intercession.

1340
01:21:24.040 --> 01:21:26.480
On that same day, I talked with a friend.

1341
01:21:26.480 --> 01:21:28.440
The Lord led me.

1342
01:21:28.440 --> 01:21:30.280
I've just had feelings come up.

1343
01:21:31.120 --> 01:21:32.560
I've been doing my part.

1344
01:21:32.560 --> 01:21:34.280
So the conclusion is,

1345
01:21:35.880 --> 01:21:40.560
like just Saturday, I did something called Emanuel Way.

1346
01:21:40.560 --> 01:21:45.080
It's like Emanuel journaling, listening to the Lord,

1347
01:21:45.080 --> 01:21:49.160
and then sharing with someone else about what I'm hearing.

1348
01:21:49.160 --> 01:21:53.160
And I came to a lot of peace and joy out of that.

1349
01:21:53.160 --> 01:21:55.720
So it's been like, it's a process of the Lord

1350
01:21:55.720 --> 01:21:57.480
unearthing stuff,

1351
01:21:57.480 --> 01:22:01.920
and then I'm getting all the support I need, and I'm here.

1352
01:22:02.960 --> 01:22:05.040
So whatever else I need.

1353
01:22:05.040 --> 01:22:05.880
Yes.

1354
01:22:05.880 --> 01:22:08.760
So would you say that God is showing you,

1355
01:22:08.760 --> 01:22:11.160
because what you said is the dream revealed something

1356
01:22:11.160 --> 01:22:12.360
in you.

1357
01:22:12.360 --> 01:22:13.200
Yes.

1358
01:22:13.200 --> 01:22:16.600
So are you, is your step forgiving yourself?

1359
01:22:16.600 --> 01:22:18.080
Is that what's happening?

1360
01:22:18.080 --> 01:22:20.280
It wasn't about forgiving myself.

1361
01:22:20.280 --> 01:22:23.440
It was actually helping this part of me

1362
01:22:23.440 --> 01:22:26.080
to not take it out on myself.

1363
01:22:27.440 --> 01:22:28.840
I mean, I actually, in the dream,

1364
01:22:28.840 --> 01:22:31.080
this part of me just said, I might as well just,

1365
01:22:31.080 --> 01:22:33.360
I mean, you know, die.

1366
01:22:33.360 --> 01:22:34.760
It was pretty radical.

1367
01:22:34.760 --> 01:22:37.240
And the Lord, when the Lord came in,

1368
01:22:38.280 --> 01:22:39.880
I had compassion in the dream.

1369
01:22:39.880 --> 01:22:43.160
I had compassion on myself, which I know is good.

1370
01:22:43.160 --> 01:22:44.640
And when the Lord came in,

1371
01:22:44.640 --> 01:22:48.360
the Lord actually brought this part of me back to life.

1372
01:22:48.360 --> 01:22:50.640
It's like a resurrection type thing.

1373
01:22:50.640 --> 01:22:53.000
It was pretty radical.

1374
01:22:54.000 --> 01:22:56.440
So who are you forgiving?

1375
01:22:56.440 --> 01:22:57.760
Are you forgiving them?

1376
01:22:57.760 --> 01:22:59.600
Are you forgiving?

1377
01:22:59.600 --> 01:23:01.520
That's what I'm trying to come to.

1378
01:23:01.520 --> 01:23:03.600
Okay, gotcha, gotcha.

1379
01:23:03.600 --> 01:23:06.120
I'm actually aware of ongoingly,

1380
01:23:06.120 --> 01:23:09.160
whenever I have a negative thought or feeling,

1381
01:23:09.160 --> 01:23:12.960
it's like, Lord, I forgive them from my heart.

1382
01:23:12.960 --> 01:23:13.920
Help me do it.

1383
01:23:13.920 --> 01:23:14.880
I bless them.

1384
01:23:14.880 --> 01:23:15.720
I love them.

1385
01:23:15.720 --> 01:23:17.240
Help me say all the good things about them.

1386
01:23:17.240 --> 01:23:21.080
So it's that, that's the main thing, I think.

1387
01:23:21.080 --> 01:23:21.960
Okay.

1388
01:23:21.960 --> 01:23:22.960
That's really great, Karen.

1389
01:23:22.960 --> 01:23:24.400
Thank you so much for sharing that.

1390
01:23:24.400 --> 01:23:25.240
That's awesome.

1391
01:23:25.240 --> 01:23:26.360
Yeah, it helps to share it.

1392
01:23:26.360 --> 01:23:27.200
Thank you.

1393
01:23:27.200 --> 01:23:28.040
You're welcome.

1394
01:23:28.040 --> 01:23:31.040
And y'all, this is really awesome.

1395
01:23:31.040 --> 01:23:33.440
As y'all were in the breakouts,

1396
01:23:33.440 --> 01:23:35.880
one of the things I prayed is that God would minister

1397
01:23:35.880 --> 01:23:37.720
to you all in your dreams

1398
01:23:37.720 --> 01:23:39.440
and that you would have revelation

1399
01:23:39.440 --> 01:23:40.720
even while you're sleeping

1400
01:23:40.720 --> 01:23:45.240
and that God would do supernatural surgery, if you will.

1401
01:23:45.240 --> 01:23:47.840
And so we're believing for that for you.

1402
01:23:47.840 --> 01:23:49.720
And so you may have an increase of dreams.

1403
01:23:49.720 --> 01:23:50.920
If you didn't hear that already,

1404
01:23:50.920 --> 01:23:53.440
that will most likely happen while you're here.

1405
01:23:53.440 --> 01:23:55.160
I do want Teresa to know,

1406
01:23:55.160 --> 01:23:56.640
so when y'all go to raise your hand,

1407
01:23:56.640 --> 01:23:58.880
if you hover over the bottom of your screen,

1408
01:23:58.880 --> 01:24:01.200
like for me on my computer, the raise hands right there,

1409
01:24:01.200 --> 01:24:03.640
but you might have to click more or reactions,

1410
01:24:03.640 --> 01:24:05.120
but that should be there for you.

1411
01:24:05.120 --> 01:24:09.680
I'm gonna do my best to get through several people here

1412
01:24:09.680 --> 01:24:12.320
without cutting people short in like six minutes,

1413
01:24:12.320 --> 01:24:13.800
just to give you all the activation.

1414
01:24:13.800 --> 01:24:17.720
If there's any people that need to leave right at 9.30,

1415
01:24:17.800 --> 01:24:20.440
the activation this week is literally

1416
01:24:20.440 --> 01:24:21.960
to choose to forgive the person

1417
01:24:21.960 --> 01:24:24.840
God is putting on your heart tonight, to forgive,

1418
01:24:24.840 --> 01:24:26.600
to use the forgiveness prayer sheets

1419
01:24:26.600 --> 01:24:28.560
to process that forgiveness,

1420
01:24:28.560 --> 01:24:31.240
and then come into the group and tell us

1421
01:24:31.240 --> 01:24:33.120
who did you forgive and why.

1422
01:24:33.120 --> 01:24:36.720
Now, when you share, you all share about your situation,

1423
01:24:36.720 --> 01:24:38.880
but you don't gotta share gory details, okay?

1424
01:24:38.880 --> 01:24:41.720
So just so everyone understands,

1425
01:24:41.720 --> 01:24:44.520
a lot of people have been through a lot of deep trauma.

1426
01:24:44.520 --> 01:24:46.520
We want you to share about what you've been through,

1427
01:24:46.520 --> 01:24:49.920
but just when I say that, what I mean is like,

1428
01:24:49.920 --> 01:24:50.960
if you've been abused,

1429
01:24:50.960 --> 01:24:53.400
you don't have to tell us the details of the abuse.

1430
01:24:53.400 --> 01:24:56.040
Does that make sense, what I'm saying, everyone?

1431
01:24:56.040 --> 01:24:58.320
Because what we don't want, forgiveness week,

1432
01:24:58.320 --> 01:25:00.920
we don't want a bunch of people in the group getting.

1433
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:06.160
triggered. But we want you to feel free to share your your story. Okay. All right. So that's the

1434
01:25:06.160 --> 01:25:13.120
activation this week. It's pretty easy in the sense of it's one. I'm only giving you one this

1435
01:25:13.120 --> 01:25:17.200
week. But for some of you, there might be several people you need to forgive. And so that might feel

1436
01:25:17.200 --> 01:25:24.000
tough, but you can do it. You've got this. All right. I'm going to go to Meg R. She's new tonight.

1437
01:25:24.000 --> 01:25:28.400
Meg would love to hear what you have to say. Thanks for knowing I'm new.

1438
01:25:30.320 --> 01:25:37.920
So first, I wanted to say 1000% everything that was shared tonight was for me at a very critical

1439
01:25:37.920 --> 01:25:43.680
time in my life. I'm moving cross country. I've been away from my family 20 years, I'm going back.

1440
01:25:44.320 --> 01:25:48.880
And I'm going to be staying with my family while I get my feet on the ground. And no,

1441
01:25:48.880 --> 01:25:55.760
there are no definite plans for anything aside from showing up at this point. And the last 24

1442
01:25:55.760 --> 01:26:05.120
hours have been really questioning my sanity type moments. My sister and my mom historically have.

1443
01:26:06.800 --> 01:26:11.680
First of all, the Lord has brought me from a lot of victim to survivor to overcomer in

1444
01:26:11.680 --> 01:26:17.360
many areas of my life. I love forgiving people because I love freeing myself from that noose.

1445
01:26:18.080 --> 01:26:23.840
Yeah. And I do not want my life to be controlled by anything other than the Spirit of God and what

1446
01:26:23.840 --> 01:26:31.360
he has for my future. But something that I wasn't really, I guess, preparing for is that my sister

1447
01:26:31.360 --> 01:26:38.080
and my mother's gaslighting is continuous. And now I'm going to be in the house with my mother

1448
01:26:38.720 --> 01:26:46.560
and my sister down the road. And in the last 24 hours, the exhaustion, like coming against my body

1449
01:26:46.560 --> 01:26:51.200
combating back and forth, back and forth, you feel like you're just getting hit. And this

1450
01:26:53.440 --> 01:27:02.240
unaccountable level of anger is just surging. And I forgive, I release, I let go. And it's like the

1451
01:27:02.240 --> 01:27:07.840
Lord showed me have to forgive not just for the past, but for the current insults that are keeping

1452
01:27:07.840 --> 01:27:11.760
on happening. And you said something very interesting, Bethany. You were talking about

1453
01:27:11.760 --> 01:27:17.440
generational spirit of unforgiveness. And I knew that I'm the only one in all my generations

1454
01:27:17.440 --> 01:27:23.440
going after God, historically, as far back as I remember. And I know that all that generational

1455
01:27:23.440 --> 01:27:29.600
stuff, in addition to my own unforgiveness, is trying to sit on me and make me react.

1456
01:27:30.880 --> 01:27:37.760
And then when I do react, I was on the phone with my best friend today, just weeping and saying,

1457
01:27:37.760 --> 01:27:44.000
I am no good for anything. I'm no good for anybody. I'm just a wallflower. Why would

1458
01:27:44.000 --> 01:27:55.200
anybody want to see me? Sorry. It's all right. So I wasn't intending to do that. And of course,

1459
01:27:55.200 --> 01:28:01.120
she was being the truth. But I realized that that's the goal. When they do that gaslighting,

1460
01:28:01.120 --> 01:28:05.840
that is the enemy's goal behind it, to get me to that place where I'm a victim,

1461
01:28:05.840 --> 01:28:10.080
where there is no hope for me, where I'm going to be stuck in that house with my mother with

1462
01:28:10.080 --> 01:28:16.880
no future. And my whole life, that's been the goal. And I wanted to share because it's like

1463
01:28:16.880 --> 01:28:21.760
when you were talking about the generational curses, and me just seeing this whole vortex

1464
01:28:21.760 --> 01:28:28.720
of hell just kind of trying to come on me when those things happen, it created alternative

1465
01:28:28.720 --> 01:28:34.560
reality growing up, where I actually believed that about myself and believed that was God's

1466
01:28:34.560 --> 01:28:42.160
best for me to be nobody, to be never noticed, to be never anything. When in reality, it's all

1467
01:28:42.160 --> 01:28:50.160
a lie, even though it feels true. And so you got to make a decision. I got to make a decision against

1468
01:28:50.160 --> 01:28:56.320
my feelings all the time, every day until my new reality becomes the truth everywhere in my warp

1469
01:28:56.320 --> 01:29:05.360
and woof. Yes. So I have no idea how I'm going to do this going home. But I needed these keys tonight

1470
01:29:05.360 --> 01:29:12.160
so badly. And I'm so thankful. I hope this helps somebody else, too. I'm so glad that you shared.

1471
01:29:12.160 --> 01:29:21.440
So just so that I know, Meg, you have to move in with your mom? I'm retired on medical disability.

1472
01:29:22.080 --> 01:29:28.960
I have Lyme disease, almost killed me twice, derailed my career. So it's been a big everything.

1473
01:29:29.760 --> 01:29:36.640
And I don't really have any other friends where I could go to start off with. I do know

1474
01:29:36.640 --> 01:29:42.720
that it's a way station. It's a get my feet back under me, start to make community. I already have

1475
01:29:42.720 --> 01:29:50.480
plans to be doing different things and getting connected in different areas. And the reconnect

1476
01:29:50.480 --> 01:29:54.240
with family, never been around my nieces and nephews before because I've been away.

1477
01:29:55.040 --> 01:29:59.840
So at first, I don't have another place to go. Okay. I'm just asking.

1478
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:03.840
so that I know, so we can be praying for you specifically about some things.

1479
01:30:04.720 --> 01:30:07.600
So here's one of the things, ladies, too, that's super important.

1480
01:30:08.480 --> 01:30:14.640
While yes, 100%, what I was talking about is how things can come down through generations,

1481
01:30:14.640 --> 01:30:18.240
but here's the reality as well. God can redeem our timelines,

1482
01:30:19.440 --> 01:30:27.680
okay, and can use us to create generational blessings. And so I want you to understand that

1483
01:30:27.760 --> 01:30:36.320
when you might feel that way, God is also there warring on your behalf. You're not in that alone.

1484
01:30:36.320 --> 01:30:40.320
And so even in the way we perceive our struggles, I don't know about you all,

1485
01:30:40.320 --> 01:30:45.040
sometimes you just feel something really like heavy physically. I've been through that.

1486
01:30:45.040 --> 01:30:50.720
But the reality is, is that the things that I'm thinking also play a role in that.

1487
01:30:51.680 --> 01:30:58.000
All right. And so really reframing our minds, I'm going to say that it would be really good

1488
01:30:58.000 --> 01:31:04.080
for you to ask the Lord, even though you know, it's not true. When the pressure happened and

1489
01:31:04.080 --> 01:31:09.120
that got applied, what came out is I'm not good for anything. And I am just a wallflower. And

1490
01:31:09.120 --> 01:31:13.600
I forget exactly how else you said that. But the one in particular, I want you to spend some time

1491
01:31:13.600 --> 01:31:19.440
on this week is I am no good for anything. I want you to pray and ask the Lord, when is the first

1492
01:31:19.520 --> 01:31:25.680
time you believed that lie and partnered with it? Okay. When's the first time. And that's not just,

1493
01:31:25.680 --> 01:31:32.480
don't use your mind to identify that. Ask the Holy spirit, ask the Lord to reveal that. And

1494
01:31:32.480 --> 01:31:39.760
he will show you and you want that healing to come in that first place. Because if that wasn't still

1495
01:31:39.760 --> 01:31:44.880
needing to be healed, it wouldn't have come out like that. Thank you. Thank you. That's so helpful.

1496
01:31:44.880 --> 01:31:52.400
Yeah, you're welcome. You're welcome. And you all, you know, I would say to Meg plan a lot of

1497
01:31:52.400 --> 01:31:59.040
time, not in the house as much as possible. Yep. You need to be out as much as you can. And even

1498
01:31:59.040 --> 01:32:02.480
though you have some things physically you're overcoming, I know that can maybe come into play

1499
01:32:02.480 --> 01:32:06.480
there. Um, even if you just go to a park, I don't know what the weather's going to be like where

1500
01:32:06.480 --> 01:32:12.240
you're going, but you know, and just be somewhere where there's sun and there's outside or, you know,

1501
01:32:12.320 --> 01:32:19.440
whatnot, but just try to be around the toxicity as little as possible. All right. That's a

1502
01:32:19.440 --> 01:32:26.480
wonderful confirmation. Thank you. You're welcome. Uh, is it Yesenia? Yesenia? I'm so sorry. Tell me

1503
01:32:26.480 --> 01:32:36.960
how to say your name. Yesenia. Yesenia. Thank you. Would love for you to share. Um, so in the breakout

1504
01:32:36.960 --> 01:32:43.760
room I was sharing, um, so just kind of a little bit of backstory. Um, my parents got divorced when

1505
01:32:43.760 --> 01:32:52.400
I was 12 and my dad left after that. Um, I haven't seen him or heard from him in probably like 25

1506
01:32:52.400 --> 01:32:58.480
plus years. And my brother, I have a younger brother. He had reached out to him about a month

1507
01:32:58.480 --> 01:33:06.160
and a half ago and he came up to see us, um, for the first time in first time I've heard or seen

1508
01:33:06.240 --> 01:33:15.760
him in 25 plus years. Um, so it was this weekend and, um, you know, I've done a lot of, you know,

1509
01:33:15.760 --> 01:33:24.560
I feel like I've forgiven him. Um, I had a lot of years of just, um, anger and I, I took out a lot

1510
01:33:24.560 --> 01:33:29.200
of that on my mom. Um, but you know, when I was a teenager and stuff, but I had a lot of years of

1511
01:33:29.200 --> 01:33:38.720
just anger. So when I saw him, um, I didn't, I didn't have anger, but I did have some emotions

1512
01:33:38.720 --> 01:33:49.280
that came up. Um, just the, almost the residual, like the, the, how I've done life, you know,

1513
01:33:49.280 --> 01:33:55.200
I've recognized now the way I have done life, the way it has affected my relationships with men,

1514
01:33:55.200 --> 01:34:03.200
how I have viewed myself, all of that. Um, that's what came up was, were those feelings of

1515
01:34:03.200 --> 01:34:10.480
how I have felt stuck because of him not being there and how it affected my life. Yeah. Um,

1516
01:34:12.480 --> 01:34:19.120
so I told him that, you know, I, I did forgive him. Um, but it was just, you know, I didn't

1517
01:34:19.120 --> 01:34:25.360
realize all the stuff I had done, honestly, until this year, just how I have, um, I've cut

1518
01:34:25.360 --> 01:34:31.360
off emotions. I've pushed people away. I've built up all these walls, um, specifically with men.

1519
01:34:32.240 --> 01:34:39.440
Um, so that's something that, you know, it just happened to be the timing. Yeah. I honestly never

1520
01:34:39.440 --> 01:34:45.200
thought I'd see him or, or, um, see him again or hear from him again. And it just happened to be

1521
01:34:45.200 --> 01:34:51.600
on this weekend. Okay. Well, I think it's really timely that we talked about forgiveness tonight

1522
01:34:51.600 --> 01:34:59.840
too, to help you continue to process some of those things. And, um, I think what I've

1523
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:03.600
want to say about what you shared, it is true. We go

1524
01:35:03.600 --> 01:35:08.120
through consequences because of other people's decisions, right?

1525
01:35:09.920 --> 01:35:15.640
But not, how do I want to say this, because I want to be

1526
01:35:15.640 --> 01:35:18.560
delicate, because I can like you're in this really fresh,

1527
01:35:18.560 --> 01:35:21.680
raw place regarding your dad. But one of the things that I

1528
01:35:21.680 --> 01:35:23.880
think is going to be really important for you to take your

1529
01:35:23.880 --> 01:35:32.200
power back, is for you to not blame him for all of that. And

1530
01:35:32.200 --> 01:35:35.760
so I really want you to start asking the Lord to help you

1531
01:35:35.760 --> 01:35:40.440
separate, you know, yes, your dad left. Yes, that was hard.

1532
01:35:40.440 --> 01:35:44.560
Yes, that hurt you. And it caused you to choose things that

1533
01:35:44.560 --> 01:35:48.800
weren't probably healthy in a lot of different ways. But, you

1534
01:35:48.800 --> 01:35:52.640
know, Lord, show me the times that you Lord were showing me to

1535
01:35:52.640 --> 01:35:55.760
not go into something or not put my walls up or not block

1536
01:35:55.760 --> 01:36:00.600
people out. But I chose to do it anyways, where you can start to

1537
01:36:00.600 --> 01:36:04.360
separate. And again, this isn't to be down on yourself. But I

1538
01:36:04.360 --> 01:36:08.120
want you to use this so that you can take some of your power

1539
01:36:08.120 --> 01:36:12.920
back. Because right now what's happening is the enemy is having

1540
01:36:12.920 --> 01:36:17.720
you blame your dad for all of that. And you have no power.

1541
01:36:19.120 --> 01:36:22.560
Yeah, that makes sense. What I'm saying, when we own our

1542
01:36:22.560 --> 01:36:25.160
side of the street, you can't own the side of the street

1543
01:36:25.160 --> 01:36:27.480
regarding your dad leaving, there's nothing you can do

1544
01:36:27.480 --> 01:36:30.760
there, you have nothing to own in that. Okay, so I want to be

1545
01:36:30.760 --> 01:36:35.960
very clear on that. But after that, when you became old

1546
01:36:35.960 --> 01:36:38.680
enough, after the age of accountability, you all when we

1547
01:36:38.680 --> 01:36:44.120
get to be 18, and we know better. That's when we have to

1548
01:36:44.120 --> 01:36:47.640
really look at okay, and even if we didn't fully know better,

1549
01:36:47.760 --> 01:36:52.320
like even myself, I had a lot of healing to do even in my mid

1550
01:36:52.320 --> 01:36:56.800
30s and 40s. Y'all, I'm just about to be 47. But just there's

1551
01:36:56.800 --> 01:36:59.840
a lot of healing. But before that, there man, there's some

1552
01:36:59.840 --> 01:37:01.800
mistakes that I made just because of the absolute

1553
01:37:01.800 --> 01:37:06.360
brokenness that I came out of. But I still have to own those.

1554
01:37:07.480 --> 01:37:13.080
Does that make sense? Yeah, yeah. And when I did, I took a

1555
01:37:13.080 --> 01:37:17.960
part of myself back. And I didn't give the people that

1556
01:37:17.960 --> 01:37:21.280
harmed me all of the power, which ultimately, as you know,

1557
01:37:21.280 --> 01:37:26.360
it's the enemy through them. Right. And so I think this week

1558
01:37:26.360 --> 01:37:31.720
is going to be about you taking some of your power back. Taking

1559
01:37:31.720 --> 01:37:36.080
back like parts that, okay, yeah, in this decision, like

1560
01:37:36.080 --> 01:37:41.160
God, you were showing me and I chose. Does that make sense?

1561
01:37:41.520 --> 01:37:45.880
Yeah. Okay. And just, you know, doing the forgiveness prayer

1562
01:37:45.880 --> 01:37:50.040
sheet regarding your dad leaving, and potentially

1563
01:37:50.040 --> 01:37:54.080
forgiving him for, you know, wounds of abandonment,

1564
01:37:54.840 --> 01:37:58.520
rejection, neglect, anything that comes up for you regarding

1565
01:37:58.520 --> 01:38:02.880
your dad leaving that then fed into those other things. Yeah,

1566
01:38:02.920 --> 01:38:08.000
absolutely forgive him for that stuff. Yeah, yeah, you're

1567
01:38:08.000 --> 01:38:10.720
welcome. And I know it can be tough you all because and I

1568
01:38:10.720 --> 01:38:14.760
don't ever want anyone to think like, I don't think it's your

1569
01:38:14.760 --> 01:38:18.160
dad, or your fault that your dad left. So hopefully you hear

1570
01:38:18.160 --> 01:38:22.600
that. But what decisions did we make after these people heard us

1571
01:38:22.600 --> 01:38:25.360
when we were old enough to know different or that God was

1572
01:38:25.360 --> 01:38:27.720
speaking to us, and he was trying to lead us in a

1573
01:38:27.720 --> 01:38:31.440
different direction. And we chose. That's the

1574
01:38:31.440 --> 01:38:34.080
differentiation I'm trying to make there tonight with that.

1575
01:38:34.440 --> 01:38:37.560
Yeah. And this is for other people to not just you. Yeah.

1576
01:38:38.040 --> 01:38:40.600
Thank you. You're welcome. You're welcome. We're gonna be

1577
01:38:40.600 --> 01:38:44.560
praying for you. And let me let me ask you this other question.

1578
01:38:44.600 --> 01:38:47.520
Are you planning on seeing your dad again? How did that end up?

1579
01:38:48.040 --> 01:38:54.120
Um, he wants to establish a relationship. So I kind of left

1580
01:38:54.120 --> 01:38:59.680
it in his court, like, you know, I'm open. I'm there to

1581
01:38:59.800 --> 01:39:03.480
reciprocate the relationship. So.

1582
01:39:03.920 --> 01:39:06.680
All right. All right. Well, we'll be praying for you. You

1583
01:39:06.680 --> 01:39:11.000
know, God loves reconciliation you all when the person is

1584
01:39:11.000 --> 01:39:16.280
healthy. Okay, God loves reconciliation all the time. But

1585
01:39:16.280 --> 01:39:19.080
you know, for us, God also wants us to be in healthy

1586
01:39:19.080 --> 01:39:21.600
connection with people. If anyone needs to jump off, it's

1587
01:39:21.600 --> 01:39:25.000
totally okay. But I am going to do a couple more. I probably I'm

1588
01:39:25.000 --> 01:39:30.920
going to tell you, I've 123456789. Nine people left, I'm

1589
01:39:30.920 --> 01:39:33.360
probably not going to get through nine of you. Please no

1590
01:39:33.360 --> 01:39:37.320
one get your feelings hurt. Okay, I'm really sorry. I just

1591
01:39:37.320 --> 01:39:40.400
know that to hear your story, I'm probably not going to be

1592
01:39:40.400 --> 01:39:42.560
able to get through all of you. But I'll do as many as I can.

1593
01:39:42.560 --> 01:39:46.600
Okay. All right. Um, let's see. Christina Bernard.

1594
01:39:48.880 --> 01:39:54.720
Hi. Hi. So, in my group, I was talking about my parents. And I

1595
01:39:54.760 --> 01:39:57.200
mean, that's been bringing me on this interesting journey for a

1596
01:39:57.200 --> 01:39:59.880
year or so. But I don't like my

1597
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:03.720
parents. And I know I talked to my mom, but I don't actually

1598
01:40:03.720 --> 01:40:06.840
talk to my dad. I haven't talked to my dad in many years. But I

1599
01:40:06.840 --> 01:40:09.720
actually joined the program because God told me very clearly

1600
01:40:09.720 --> 01:40:12.080
I have to talk to him next year. And I can do that with a

1601
01:40:12.080 --> 01:40:14.080
husband or without a husband, but either way, it was going to

1602
01:40:14.080 --> 01:40:17.160
happen, right? And I've been on a journey with him and

1603
01:40:17.160 --> 01:40:21.920
obedience and, and what does that mean in action? And so I

1604
01:40:21.920 --> 01:40:25.680
guess for me, figuring out what forgiveness needs to look like

1605
01:40:25.680 --> 01:40:29.120
in that context, because I don't like my father, like he's very

1606
01:40:29.120 --> 01:40:31.400
manipulative, like compared to my mom, like I have issues with

1607
01:40:31.400 --> 01:40:34.200
my mom, but we've been able to communicate over the years

1608
01:40:34.200 --> 01:40:37.560
talking, like, we're working on healing, but he's more

1609
01:40:37.560 --> 01:40:41.000
manipulative. And I have siblings, and they understand my

1610
01:40:41.000 --> 01:40:43.720
perspective. And they've been trying to figure out their

1611
01:40:43.720 --> 01:40:48.080
perspective on it as well. But how do you how do you do that?

1612
01:40:48.080 --> 01:40:54.520
And, and what does that need to look like? In context, you know,

1613
01:40:54.520 --> 01:40:58.520
parental things, and it's not that I'm blaming him for my

1614
01:40:58.520 --> 01:41:02.040
existing life, because I've made a lot of changes. Really

1615
01:41:02.040 --> 01:41:04.600
hard for like, I rechanged my friend group several years ago.

1616
01:41:04.600 --> 01:41:07.280
So a few years without friends, and then I got more Christian

1617
01:41:07.640 --> 01:41:12.040
friends and stopped doing behaviors. It's just I don't

1618
01:41:12.040 --> 01:41:14.320
like him as a person. So and I know I have to be in

1619
01:41:14.320 --> 01:41:16.560
relationship with him. Like I don't get the option to opt out

1620
01:41:16.560 --> 01:41:20.080
anymore. From next year, about next summer, I think is the

1621
01:41:20.080 --> 01:41:22.760
calling God has for me. And so how do you

1622
01:41:22.800 --> 01:41:25.040
understand there's there's something I want a different

1623
01:41:25.360 --> 01:41:29.920
help you see here. God isn't going to force you to do

1624
01:41:29.920 --> 01:41:35.280
anything. Okay? God might be inviting you into that. But I

1625
01:41:35.280 --> 01:41:40.400
want you to know that it doesn't mean that you have to necessarily

1626
01:41:40.400 --> 01:41:45.640
hang out with your dad. Okay? It might mean that, but I don't

1627
01:41:45.640 --> 01:41:49.160
think it always has to mean that. So I want you to really

1628
01:41:49.160 --> 01:41:51.960
be open to what the Holy Spirit shows you like you're asking me

1629
01:41:51.960 --> 01:41:54.480
what is forgiveness look like in this context? Well, I think the

1630
01:41:54.480 --> 01:41:58.120
first step is choosing to forgive and then letting the

1631
01:41:58.120 --> 01:42:01.360
Lord lead you into what it's going to look like because I

1632
01:42:01.360 --> 01:42:03.560
could say a blanket statement right now and say, Oh, it's

1633
01:42:03.560 --> 01:42:07.160
going to look like this. But every situation is so different.

1634
01:42:07.160 --> 01:42:10.360
And if I say, Oh, this is what it's going to look like, then

1635
01:42:11.200 --> 01:42:14.800
I'm just going to make this up. Maybe Leah has something God's

1636
01:42:14.800 --> 01:42:17.000
saying to her that's totally different than what God is

1637
01:42:17.000 --> 01:42:20.920
saying to you. And so it can't always just be a blanket

1638
01:42:20.920 --> 01:42:25.440
statement. But what I can say is that choosing to forgive

1639
01:42:25.880 --> 01:42:30.640
doesn't mean we have to like, like people. What do I mean by

1640
01:42:30.640 --> 01:42:34.240
that God calls us to love people. But that doesn't mean we

1641
01:42:34.240 --> 01:42:37.760
have to just constantly be around someone that's toxic.

1642
01:42:39.440 --> 01:42:43.760
There is there is healthiness and boundary setting. I think I

1643
01:42:43.760 --> 01:42:49.000
said it last week, even Jesus set boundaries. Now, if the Lord

1644
01:42:49.000 --> 01:42:52.680
is leading you, so for example, I'll use my own life. The Lord

1645
01:42:52.680 --> 01:42:57.360
has asked me to minister to my family, my brothers, my sister,

1646
01:42:57.640 --> 01:43:02.160
my brothers were my main abusers. Yeah, that's hard. I

1647
01:43:02.160 --> 01:43:05.480
don't really like it. I don't feel physically good when I go

1648
01:43:05.480 --> 01:43:09.640
around them. But I go prepared. And with my mindset, right to

1649
01:43:09.640 --> 01:43:15.920
minister, whatever that's going to look like. God didn't force

1650
01:43:15.920 --> 01:43:19.800
me into that, though. It was an invitation. And so it wasn't

1651
01:43:19.800 --> 01:43:23.200
like I felt pushed into it. Does that make sense? Why I'm saying

1652
01:43:23.200 --> 01:43:23.880
that to you?

1653
01:43:25.840 --> 01:43:34.440
Yes. But I guess I get that as invitation, but I know it's the

1654
01:43:34.440 --> 01:43:39.080
invitation I have to accept. And I don't know. Like, I think for

1655
01:43:39.080 --> 01:43:43.120
me, because being in the course, I've learned over the past few

1656
01:43:43.120 --> 01:43:46.080
weeks that I haven't actually decided to change my life. Like

1657
01:43:46.080 --> 01:43:49.760
I've said it, but I haven't. And I've been doing actions of

1658
01:43:49.760 --> 01:43:53.560
survival, if that makes sense to do those changes, versus actions

1659
01:43:53.560 --> 01:43:59.000
of thriving. And I think for me, in order to thrive, I have to

1660
01:43:59.840 --> 01:44:03.200
decide I'm not surviving anymore. And so in order for me

1661
01:44:03.200 --> 01:44:08.800
not to survive, I need to say, okay, this has to happen. And I

1662
01:44:08.800 --> 01:44:11.320
think that's why it's coming up. I didn't know that before I got

1663
01:44:11.320 --> 01:44:13.360
to this course. But and especially after you said what

1664
01:44:13.360 --> 01:44:17.800
you said earlier, I'm realizing I can be perfectly fine without

1665
01:44:17.800 --> 01:44:23.640
doing that. And I can have the boundaries. But if I don't want

1666
01:44:23.640 --> 01:44:25.840
to survive anymore, because I like quit my job last April,

1667
01:44:25.880 --> 01:44:29.800
been on this wild journey with God is strange, moved back home,

1668
01:44:30.520 --> 01:44:35.160
a lot of stuff happened. But I realized that it's over the past

1669
01:44:35.160 --> 01:44:37.920
few sessions that I'm just surviving. And what and I haven't

1670
01:44:37.920 --> 01:44:43.640
decided to do thriving, and I'm being invited into, okay, if I'm

1671
01:44:43.640 --> 01:44:46.480
not going to live previously, like I was, what do the next 30

1672
01:44:46.480 --> 01:44:48.880
years need to look like? Because I built a whole survival

1673
01:44:48.880 --> 01:44:52.120
parameter around how do I get out of this situation in my own

1674
01:44:52.120 --> 01:44:55.920
power, right? And if I'm not in my own power, I have to be in

1675
01:44:55.920 --> 01:44:59.240
God's power. And if God is saying I need to forgive my dad,

1676
01:44:59.240 --> 01:44:59.920
and there's going to be

1677
01:45:00.000 --> 01:45:02.360
something there, I think I just have to do it.

1678
01:45:02.360 --> 01:45:03.480
If that makes sense.

1679
01:45:03.480 --> 01:45:07.560
Yeah, and it helps to have you explain it out

1680
01:45:07.560 --> 01:45:12.560
because I wanna make sure that even in the I have to,

1681
01:45:13.580 --> 01:45:17.000
I understand what you're saying spiritually, okay?

1682
01:45:17.000 --> 01:45:20.120
I know that you're saying God is asking me to do this

1683
01:45:20.120 --> 01:45:23.060
and I need to walk in obedience to that.

1684
01:45:24.140 --> 01:45:25.600
Is that what you're saying?

1685
01:45:25.600 --> 01:45:26.440
Yeah.

1686
01:45:26.640 --> 01:45:29.920
So to me, that's different than I have to.

1687
01:45:31.800 --> 01:45:35.840
God is inviting you and you're choosing to obey.

1688
01:45:37.160 --> 01:45:39.360
Do you see the difference in the language there, ladies?

1689
01:45:39.360 --> 01:45:43.080
I know it's such a small thing, but it's a big deal.

1690
01:45:43.080 --> 01:45:46.440
God is inviting you and ultimately,

1691
01:45:46.440 --> 01:45:47.840
this is what I'm getting at.

1692
01:45:48.760 --> 01:45:53.120
If you chose not to, God would love you the same.

1693
01:45:53.120 --> 01:45:55.600
It doesn't mean you don't choose to forgive,

1694
01:45:55.640 --> 01:45:57.960
but what I hear you saying is that you feel like

1695
01:45:57.960 --> 01:46:01.160
forgiving is connected to being with him,

1696
01:46:01.160 --> 01:46:03.280
if I'm understanding what you're saying correctly.

1697
01:46:03.280 --> 01:46:06.000
And that might be true, and God might completely,

1698
01:46:06.000 --> 01:46:08.620
radically heal your relationship and all of that,

1699
01:46:08.620 --> 01:46:11.420
set your dad free, who knows what's gonna happen?

1700
01:46:11.420 --> 01:46:15.360
So yes, absolutely, obey, forgive, walk in that

1701
01:46:15.360 --> 01:46:18.280
and see what God does, but make sure that your heart

1702
01:46:18.280 --> 01:46:21.440
is shifting out of I have to do this

1703
01:46:21.440 --> 01:46:25.300
to God is asking me and I'm choosing to obey.

1704
01:46:25.860 --> 01:46:26.700
I'm choosing.

1705
01:46:29.620 --> 01:46:32.300
It's really important, it goes back to what I was saying

1706
01:46:32.300 --> 01:46:37.300
to Eusinia, when you're saying I have to do this,

1707
01:46:38.160 --> 01:46:41.580
you have no power and God is forcing you,

1708
01:46:41.580 --> 01:46:43.320
and that's not true.

1709
01:46:43.320 --> 01:46:47.720
We have free will, everybody has free will to choose.

1710
01:46:48.740 --> 01:46:52.340
So you're choosing, you're choosing to follow him

1711
01:46:52.380 --> 01:46:55.500
and walk in obedience to what he's showing you.

1712
01:46:55.500 --> 01:46:57.940
And ladies, when we do that, sometimes it leads

1713
01:46:57.940 --> 01:47:02.540
really into these beautiful redemptive things and whatnot.

1714
01:47:02.540 --> 01:47:06.140
So keep us posted on how that goes as you choose to forgive,

1715
01:47:06.140 --> 01:47:09.060
that's step number one, okay?

1716
01:47:09.060 --> 01:47:11.920
And yeah, let's just see where else God leads,

1717
01:47:11.920 --> 01:47:13.460
this is really good, Christina.

1718
01:47:15.020 --> 01:47:16.300
Thanks for sharing.

1719
01:47:16.300 --> 01:47:18.540
All right, I'm probably gonna take two more,

1720
01:47:18.540 --> 01:47:20.140
and again, I'm so sorry for the ladies

1721
01:47:20.140 --> 01:47:21.800
that I didn't get to tonight.

1722
01:47:22.640 --> 01:47:25.520
If you want to process with me in the group,

1723
01:47:25.520 --> 01:47:27.560
please go in there and share,

1724
01:47:27.560 --> 01:47:29.640
and I will give you feedback there

1725
01:47:29.640 --> 01:47:34.480
on what your situation was and what you wanna process.

1726
01:47:34.480 --> 01:47:35.960
So I'm gonna go with Joey,

1727
01:47:35.960 --> 01:47:39.000
because I don't think I've ever heard from Joey before.

1728
01:47:42.120 --> 01:47:44.440
So am I on?

1729
01:47:46.000 --> 01:47:51.000
Okay, hi, okay, so I was divorced about,

1730
01:47:51.320 --> 01:47:56.320
so in 2021, and a lot of trauma from that marriage,

1731
01:47:56.400 --> 01:48:00.520
betrayal, abandonment, neglect,

1732
01:48:00.520 --> 01:48:03.560
a lot of alcohol use, all of that.

1733
01:48:03.560 --> 01:48:07.120
And so interesting though, last week,

1734
01:48:07.120 --> 01:48:09.480
I don't know what happened, but I,

1735
01:48:09.480 --> 01:48:11.000
and I've done a lot of work,

1736
01:48:11.000 --> 01:48:16.000
I mean, just in the last four years to get through that.

1737
01:48:17.320 --> 01:48:19.840
But it was interesting, and what I was kind of mentioning

1738
01:48:19.840 --> 01:48:23.480
in the group is that a gentleman hit on me,

1739
01:48:23.480 --> 01:48:28.480
and there was just something about him that triggered me.

1740
01:48:28.840 --> 01:48:31.640
And I think there were some similarities,

1741
01:48:31.640 --> 01:48:34.040
I think, from my ex.

1742
01:48:34.040 --> 01:48:36.440
But I think the thing that really bothered me

1743
01:48:36.440 --> 01:48:39.400
was that I think what I need,

1744
01:48:39.400 --> 01:48:41.760
because I've forgiven him, like I, we've even talked,

1745
01:48:41.760 --> 01:48:44.280
I mean, we've done a lot of forgiveness,

1746
01:48:44.280 --> 01:48:45.640
but just because that's just kind of my heart,

1747
01:48:45.640 --> 01:48:47.640
I don't, not gonna hang on to it.

1748
01:48:47.680 --> 01:48:50.440
So, but I think what happened was,

1749
01:48:50.440 --> 01:48:53.120
in that moment, I just felt like,

1750
01:48:54.840 --> 01:48:57.160
oh, I would never be in this situation,

1751
01:48:57.160 --> 01:49:01.600
you know, if he wouldn't have done that.

1752
01:49:04.000 --> 01:49:05.440
Okay.

1753
01:49:05.440 --> 01:49:09.640
So again, had to sit back again and forgive him again.

1754
01:49:09.640 --> 01:49:11.280
You know, so there was just this moment

1755
01:49:11.280 --> 01:49:13.160
where like, if this just keeps kind of,

1756
01:49:13.160 --> 01:49:14.680
this is probably the one thing I think

1757
01:49:14.680 --> 01:49:17.120
that just has circled back a couple times,

1758
01:49:17.640 --> 01:49:19.120
but I've had to kind of really,

1759
01:49:20.040 --> 01:49:21.760
because I can never figure out what it is,

1760
01:49:21.760 --> 01:49:24.080
because it's not, you know, I mean,

1761
01:49:24.080 --> 01:49:26.400
the actual acts and those type of things,

1762
01:49:26.400 --> 01:49:28.720
the things that happen, I mean, those things,

1763
01:49:28.720 --> 01:49:31.720
that's not what it is, it's the underlying.

1764
01:49:32.680 --> 01:49:35.400
Did anyone else in your, did your parents divorce

1765
01:49:35.400 --> 01:49:37.440
or anyone else close to you?

1766
01:49:37.440 --> 01:49:39.880
Okay, so there's not any kind of residual stuff

1767
01:49:39.880 --> 01:49:42.520
left over from that, that's kind of clinging, okay.

1768
01:49:42.520 --> 01:49:43.720
I just wanna make sure.

1769
01:49:43.920 --> 01:49:47.720
Um, yeah, I mean, I think sometimes it's just,

1770
01:49:49.600 --> 01:49:52.360
even underlying, let me ask you this,

1771
01:49:52.360 --> 01:49:54.160
here's something else that's coming up in my spirit

1772
01:49:54.160 --> 01:49:56.760
without saying it, I wanna ask you a question first.

1773
01:49:57.760 --> 01:50:00.000
So when that came up in you.

1774
01:50:00.000 --> 01:50:03.440
and you like, I would never be in this situation if he had never done that.

1775
01:50:04.240 --> 01:50:09.920
So how would you describe the feeling that you had? Are you saying you felt embarrassed? Are you

1776
01:50:09.920 --> 01:50:18.640
saying that you felt angry? Tell me what your feeling was. I think it's more of a disappointment.

1777
01:50:19.760 --> 01:50:26.160
You know, I think there's just a level of, you know, because I mean, he is out and I think

1778
01:50:26.160 --> 01:50:30.880
there's a little bit where he's still out doing his thing and he is who he is and I've just

1779
01:50:30.880 --> 01:50:35.360
accepted that. I'm like, there's nothing I can do, you know, and we have old, you know,

1780
01:50:35.360 --> 01:50:40.240
we have a daughter and she went through a lot of difficulty with it too, just trauma because he

1781
01:50:40.240 --> 01:50:45.360
kind of abandoned her at 16 years old and pretty much said, well, you're 16 and you have a car,

1782
01:50:45.360 --> 01:50:50.000
so I don't need to be here anymore. It's kind of, but he was also drinking a lot. So there was just

1783
01:50:50.000 --> 01:50:58.160
a lot of, you know, I know the drinking played a huge part in a lot of what happened. But I think

1784
01:50:58.800 --> 01:51:02.880
for me, it's just more disappointment. I think just because, and I think I'm also,

1785
01:51:02.880 --> 01:51:07.920
all my kids are grown and I'm an empty nester. And so now I'm like, Oh,

1786
01:51:09.040 --> 01:51:12.960
how, how recent is the empty nester? Is it just like, just recent?

1787
01:51:12.960 --> 01:51:18.000
It was actually the same year that my, no, the following year. So 2022.

1788
01:51:18.640 --> 01:51:22.000
Okay. Yeah. And then my daughter moved back in with me for just a little bit,

1789
01:51:22.000 --> 01:51:26.080
just because she kind of went through some of her own issues kind of from this, but now she's

1790
01:51:26.080 --> 01:51:30.080
doing so much better on her own. So there's been some really good blessings. And I mean,

1791
01:51:30.080 --> 01:51:34.400
the one thing I have noticed, I've become, I've come so much closer to the Lord through this

1792
01:51:34.400 --> 01:51:42.720
whole entire process, which has been a blessing. Um, and, but I, yeah, there was just, I mean,

1793
01:51:42.720 --> 01:51:47.760
it did trigger me, but I think there was also one thing I was really proud of myself is that

1794
01:51:47.760 --> 01:51:53.440
I discerned him so quickly. I was like, he didn't even really have to say much. I,

1795
01:51:53.440 --> 01:51:57.360
and he was claiming, you know, and he is probably a Christian, but he was

1796
01:51:58.000 --> 01:52:03.920
quoting scripture and all kinds of stuff, but just, I had like this inkling about, I just felt

1797
01:52:03.920 --> 01:52:10.800
it. And I was like, and he confirmed it very quickly. So, um, so that was actually, that was

1798
01:52:10.800 --> 01:52:18.800
a win for me. So I was like, Oh, well, I definitely want marriages to succeed. Um,

1799
01:52:19.360 --> 01:52:23.040
to me, when I hear you talking, it sounds like God went on a rescue mission.

1800
01:52:25.760 --> 01:52:31.280
And so I feel like there's a lot of themes tonight about the verbiage and the way we're saying

1801
01:52:31.280 --> 01:52:36.000
things and the way that we're thinking about things. Well, I understand what you're saying.

1802
01:52:36.080 --> 01:52:40.560
If he had never done the things he had done, you would still be with him,

1803
01:52:42.000 --> 01:52:46.560
but based off of what you're telling me, it wasn't a happy, healthy marriage.

1804
01:52:47.360 --> 01:52:52.240
No. So let's kind of unpack that a little bit, ladies. Why would we want to be back with

1805
01:52:52.240 --> 01:53:02.000
something? So what is that getting out at the core? Okay. Who are we without these people that

1806
01:53:02.000 --> 01:53:08.400
are unhealthy? Why would we want, why would we, you know, want to even partner with the lie that,

1807
01:53:08.400 --> 01:53:13.120
Hey, if they hadn't done this, I'd still be with them. Well, yeah, you would be, but would,

1808
01:53:13.120 --> 01:53:19.920
would you be healthy? Would you be thriving? Would you be fulfilled? And again, I'm always,

1809
01:53:19.920 --> 01:53:25.360
you know, of course for covenant, but that there's a lot of things in that did not sound covenant.

1810
01:53:26.080 --> 01:53:32.240
Right. And I think that was part, like I, you know, he, I am very strong believer in marriage

1811
01:53:32.240 --> 01:53:37.520
and like you, you fight for it. He did not. But again, you know, I look at it and I'm like,

1812
01:53:37.520 --> 01:53:42.720
you know, when you have substance abuse and all kinds of things going on, it's not something that,

1813
01:53:43.920 --> 01:53:48.080
that doesn't help, you know? And that's a spirit that, I mean, that's a spirit that's attached.

1814
01:53:48.080 --> 01:53:54.800
And I, you know it's just, you know, it is what it is, but no, and it was not a great marriage.

1815
01:53:54.800 --> 01:54:00.160
And I think part of it was, it's just, you know, you have this, like you kind of mentioned earlier,

1816
01:54:00.160 --> 01:54:04.640
like this fantasy in your head, like, Oh, the kids leave, you just started doing all the vacations

1817
01:54:04.640 --> 01:54:07.520
and you started doing all the things. And then, you know, and now I'm like,

1818
01:54:08.160 --> 01:54:14.320
okay, I'm not quite doing that. And it's been a rough few years. I mean, just in the sense of

1819
01:54:15.280 --> 01:54:21.680
healing my, you know, my daughter going to kind of, I mean, I mean, drinking a bottle of vodka

1820
01:54:21.760 --> 01:54:25.840
a day, like, and she's 21. I mean, I had to bring her into my house and just, because I mean,

1821
01:54:25.840 --> 01:54:31.200
she would not go into treatment. So, but she's, it's amazing by the grace of God. Like, I mean,

1822
01:54:31.200 --> 01:54:37.120
he healed her. I just prayed and prayed and prayed and, you know, and I mean, and so I've seen all

1823
01:54:37.120 --> 01:54:44.880
these miracles happen with him, which has been wildly amazing, you know? And it's like, I see

1824
01:54:44.880 --> 01:54:52.480
this like restoration and redemption happening for my family. Yeah. You know, he's not so much

1825
01:54:52.480 --> 01:54:57.520
included, but like, you know, my kid, like, I just see this beautiful thing happening.

1826
01:54:57.520 --> 01:54:59.760
But then when I, this gentleman, I just noticed it.

1827
01:55:00.000 --> 01:55:02.000
I mean, and so there was like two things that kind of happened.

1828
01:55:02.000 --> 01:55:03.880
That thought came up and then the other thought was like,

1829
01:55:03.880 --> 01:55:05.720
I was so proud of myself that I caught it.

1830
01:55:05.920 --> 01:55:06.400
I was like,

1831
01:55:07.120 --> 01:55:07.600
for sure.

1832
01:55:07.640 --> 01:55:08.920
And I heard that part of it.

1833
01:55:08.960 --> 01:55:09.200
Yeah.

1834
01:55:09.200 --> 01:55:14.000
And I did hear that part, but the Lord wants me to go after some other stuff.

1835
01:55:14.000 --> 01:55:17.920
And so I want you to really look at where you're partnering with the lie that,

1836
01:55:18.320 --> 01:55:22.680
you know, Hey, I'm in this situation just because of him, where God like

1837
01:55:22.720 --> 01:55:28.180
literally set you free and you're saying, okay, which again, I want you to hear it.

1838
01:55:28.180 --> 01:55:29.180
Like I understand.

1839
01:55:29.180 --> 01:55:32.020
Cause I processed a lot of things in the past that you're,

1840
01:55:32.060 --> 01:55:35.340
that you're talking about where we have these dreams and we think something's

1841
01:55:35.340 --> 01:55:36.540
going to happen a certain way.

1842
01:55:36.540 --> 01:55:37.980
And then it's not like that.

1843
01:55:38.340 --> 01:55:41.900
And so we kind of feel like it's all their fault.

1844
01:55:42.380 --> 01:55:45.780
If they had just done this and we'd be together, if they, you know,

1845
01:55:45.780 --> 01:55:47.580
my ex, if he had just gotten help.

1846
01:55:47.860 --> 01:55:54.100
Well, who knows what is cause anxiety and they feed into the lies and

1847
01:55:54.100 --> 01:55:55.140
things that we're believing.

1848
01:55:55.340 --> 01:55:59.860
And so one of the things I wrote down, as you said, I fantasize that we'd be

1849
01:55:59.860 --> 01:56:02.180
going on vacations and trips and all that.

1850
01:56:02.180 --> 01:56:05.220
And I hear you saying, you know, you couldn't because your daughter, but

1851
01:56:05.220 --> 01:56:06.900
guess what, your daughter's healed now.

1852
01:56:07.660 --> 01:56:11.020
And so when are you going to plan a vacation to go on a trip?

1853
01:56:11.740 --> 01:56:16.220
Well, this is funny because, well, I was one that said I laughed at myself today.

1854
01:56:16.220 --> 01:56:21.420
So, um, so I ended up last year, I had brain surgery.

1855
01:56:21.420 --> 01:56:23.700
I had a tumor in my head that should have been paralyzed.

1856
01:56:23.700 --> 01:56:25.620
I should have been paralyzed all on the left side.

1857
01:56:26.140 --> 01:56:27.860
Um, and ended up having cancer on it.

1858
01:56:27.980 --> 01:56:30.180
Um, got it removed.

1859
01:56:30.740 --> 01:56:34.020
They said, Oh, there was cancer in it, wanted to do chemo radiation.

1860
01:56:34.020 --> 01:56:36.060
And I just knew that God, God had healed it.

1861
01:56:36.140 --> 01:56:37.780
Like, I'm like, it's not coming back.

1862
01:56:37.780 --> 01:56:40.460
I already knew, like, it was just so knowing.

1863
01:56:40.900 --> 01:56:44.620
And so I, it is not, it's, there's nothing there.

1864
01:56:45.220 --> 01:56:46.740
And this tumor was so big.

1865
01:56:46.940 --> 01:56:47.260
Yeah.

1866
01:56:47.260 --> 01:56:50.820
So I'm like, God has just done some wild stuff for me.

1867
01:56:50.820 --> 01:56:52.460
He's like, it's so crazy.

1868
01:56:53.180 --> 01:56:54.740
I have spent, and it's weird.

1869
01:56:54.740 --> 01:56:58.020
He gave me like from, and this was just in December last year.

1870
01:56:58.020 --> 01:57:00.740
I had this, this surgery.

1871
01:57:00.740 --> 01:57:07.100
And so, um, I have gone from, um, so all January, all

1872
01:57:07.100 --> 01:57:08.740
December, January, February, March.

1873
01:57:08.860 --> 01:57:10.780
I mean, I lost my job in March.

1874
01:57:11.300 --> 01:57:15.100
Um, and the crazy thing is I went back to work a week later,

1875
01:57:15.100 --> 01:57:16.140
but I lost my job in March.

1876
01:57:16.300 --> 01:57:19.420
God had just, he like provided for me all the way through.

1877
01:57:19.420 --> 01:57:20.980
I just got a new job again.

1878
01:57:21.500 --> 01:57:24.100
Um, but it's been so well, this is the funny part.

1879
01:57:24.100 --> 01:57:28.180
I actually, there was something kind of going on with me in between all this,

1880
01:57:28.180 --> 01:57:32.780
where it's kind of like, what just happened, like all of this stuff, but

1881
01:57:32.780 --> 01:57:34.620
there were so many, so many good things.

1882
01:57:34.620 --> 01:57:35.940
Cause God healed me.

1883
01:57:36.780 --> 01:57:39.020
And so, but it was funny because.

1884
01:57:39.460 --> 01:57:42.900
I'm just sitting here today and I'm like, you know, and I don't know if

1885
01:57:42.900 --> 01:57:46.100
there was something in my, my mind, like, oh gosh, like it's almost like

1886
01:57:46.100 --> 01:57:49.620
my blessings are used up because God like healed me from cancer and like

1887
01:57:49.620 --> 01:57:53.900
brain, like this huge brain surgery that everyone looks at me and goes like a

1888
01:57:53.900 --> 01:57:57.460
month later, my brain was completely healed and they're like, okay, what just

1889
01:57:57.460 --> 01:57:57.940
happened?

1890
01:57:57.980 --> 01:57:59.940
And I had so much peace during it.

1891
01:58:00.460 --> 01:58:02.900
Um, I wasn't fearful at all.

1892
01:58:02.980 --> 01:58:03.820
So weird.

1893
01:58:04.260 --> 01:58:06.700
Um, and this whole entire, the last few months.

1894
01:58:06.700 --> 01:58:09.260
And I just had this thing where I just busted.

1895
01:58:09.260 --> 01:58:13.260
It was almost like I saw God, like, you know, Jesus staring at me and he just

1896
01:58:13.620 --> 01:58:17.900
raised his eyebrow when I thought, well, you kind of, you know, I mean, a marriage

1897
01:58:17.900 --> 01:58:22.660
promise, like, again, like, I don't know, like, I mean, I just, you just healed me.

1898
01:58:22.660 --> 01:58:23.580
You healed my daughter.

1899
01:58:23.580 --> 01:58:24.860
You did all these things, you know?

1900
01:58:24.860 --> 01:58:28.460
So I was like, so grateful, but I, it's like, he gave me the, like the one

1901
01:58:28.460 --> 01:58:31.820
eyebrow up, you know, like I almost saw his face, like, are you serious right now?

1902
01:58:32.140 --> 01:58:33.900
And so I just busted out laughing.

1903
01:58:33.900 --> 01:58:34.780
Cause I'm like, okay.

1904
01:58:35.100 --> 01:58:39.340
Like, it's not like his blessings are dried up now because I did all this, you

1905
01:58:39.340 --> 01:58:43.740
know, so that's kind of where, and it's like, I just had this breakthrough moment

1906
01:58:43.740 --> 01:58:48.620
the last few days where it's just been like, I've released so much where it just

1907
01:58:48.620 --> 01:58:52.260
feels so good and I can now start.

1908
01:58:52.260 --> 01:58:53.860
I'm like, oh, I think I want to do this.

1909
01:58:53.860 --> 01:58:55.060
I think I'm going to go to Nashville.

1910
01:58:55.060 --> 01:58:56.020
Why don't I try that?

1911
01:58:56.020 --> 01:58:58.540
Why don't you know, it's so different.

1912
01:58:58.900 --> 01:59:00.380
And I haven't had that forever.

1913
01:59:01.020 --> 01:59:01.820
That's really good.

1914
01:59:02.100 --> 01:59:08.500
So I wrote down as you were sharing more live again, time for you to choose to live

1915
01:59:09.340 --> 01:59:13.140
And, um, Hey ladies, just FYI, God's blessings.

1916
01:59:13.140 --> 01:59:13.780
Don't run.

1917
01:59:13.820 --> 01:59:14.700
They don't run out.

1918
01:59:15.140 --> 01:59:15.980
They don't dry up.

1919
01:59:16.500 --> 01:59:19.540
We don't get to a place where he's like, oh, I blessed you too much

1920
01:59:19.540 --> 01:59:21.340
daughter, so you're cut off now.

1921
01:59:21.780 --> 01:59:22.220
Okay.

1922
01:59:22.540 --> 01:59:23.500
That's not how it works.

1923
01:59:23.500 --> 01:59:27.260
So let's just make sure we like, it sounds like you're already on your way to like,

1924
01:59:27.260 --> 01:59:30.140
you knew that was kind of Lord's like, okay, yeah, that's not truth.

1925
01:59:30.540 --> 01:59:35.580
Um, so praying that you continue to receive the truth that, you know, he wants

1926
01:59:35.580 --> 01:59:36.860
to continue to work in your life.

1927
01:59:36.900 --> 01:59:40.660
And, and honestly, uh, it sounds like you're just getting started in the

1928
01:59:40.660 --> 01:59:46.860
blessing zone, um, and God is going to continue to bless and minister and heal.

1929
01:59:47.180 --> 01:59:49.260
And, uh, it looks forward.

1930
01:59:49.420 --> 01:59:53.020
I look forward to seeing some photos if you go to Nashville and go on a trip,

1931
01:59:53.300 --> 01:59:57.300
but just that you really choose to, and it doesn't have to cost a lot of money.

1932
01:59:57.300 --> 01:59:57.620
Ladies.

1933
01:59:57.620 --> 01:59:59.940
When I say this kind of stuff, if I feel led.

1934
02:00:00.000 --> 02:00:03.800
say, Hey, when you're going on trip, don't feel like that means

1935
02:00:03.800 --> 02:00:06.080
you have to spend a lot of money, but maybe it's just even

1936
02:00:06.080 --> 02:00:08.880
a day trip, you go somewhere new that you've never been. And you

1937
02:00:08.880 --> 02:00:12.400
allow yourself to really start to adventure out because you

1938
02:00:12.400 --> 02:00:15.720
don't have to wait for your spirit mate to do that. Okay.

1939
02:00:15.880 --> 02:00:18.680
And it's actually important for y'all to do it before your

1940
02:00:18.680 --> 02:00:21.960
spirit mate comes so that you learn more about yourself.

1941
02:00:22.240 --> 02:00:25.280
Because even if you were married before some of y'all like didn't

1942
02:00:25.280 --> 02:00:28.160
even know who you were when you got married. And then a bunch of

1943
02:00:28.160 --> 02:00:31.960
stuff happened. And so this is like a discovery time for you to

1944
02:00:31.960 --> 02:00:35.600
get to know yourself and grow. All right, y'all. We're at 10

1945
02:00:35.600 --> 02:00:38.920
o'clock 10 o'clock Eastern. So I'm gonna have to close this out

1946
02:00:38.920 --> 02:00:42.680
tonight. We went way long again, but I wanted to give some extra

1947
02:00:42.680 --> 02:00:45.720
time because we had a lot of people. Please come into the

1948
02:00:45.720 --> 02:00:49.720
group and share with me. We'll be back again live next week.

1949
02:00:49.760 --> 02:00:53.560
And I'll try to teach a little less next week. So that we have

1950
02:00:53.560 --> 02:00:56.600
more time for the coaching and get more people in. Thanks for

1951
02:00:56.600 --> 02:01:00.400
your grace tonight on those of you that did not get to share.

1952
02:01:00.520 --> 02:01:04.160
Love you. And I look forward to seeing your post the community

1953
02:01:04.160 --> 02:01:08.080
tab. So when you go into the app, the community tab there.

1954
02:01:09.200 --> 02:01:11.960
All right, let me pray for us. Father, thank you so much for

1955
02:01:11.960 --> 02:01:16.880
this night. We thank you God for we thank you God for truth. We

1956
02:01:16.880 --> 02:01:20.480
thank you God for life. We thank you for joy unspeakable and full

1957
02:01:20.480 --> 02:01:25.080
of glory being ours. I thank you God that your word says that

1958
02:01:25.080 --> 02:01:29.080
those who love you that we can experience the goodness of God

1959
02:01:29.080 --> 02:01:32.520
in the land of the living. God, I thank you that we don't have to

1960
02:01:32.520 --> 02:01:35.400
fear what come it was going to come tomorrow. We don't even

1961
02:01:35.400 --> 02:01:38.240
have to worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry

1962
02:01:38.240 --> 02:01:41.440
about its own things. All we have to do is, is take one day

1963
02:01:41.440 --> 02:01:44.240
at a time. So Lord, I pray even as the ladies go to sleep

1964
02:01:44.240 --> 02:01:49.440
tonight, that you administer healing. And yes, Lord, yes,

1965
02:01:49.440 --> 02:01:54.640
Lord, life, joy, that peace would be theirs. God, you are

1966
02:01:54.640 --> 02:01:57.360
the God of peace. And we just thank you that your peace would

1967
02:01:57.360 --> 02:02:01.840
wash over them in a fresh way. Or that you administer to them

1968
02:02:01.880 --> 02:02:05.200
in the in the night hours, God, that they would hear your voice

1969
02:02:05.200 --> 02:02:09.960
God that they would. Yes, Lord, be quick into your word, that

1970
02:02:09.960 --> 02:02:12.320
they would hunger and thirst for your righteousness for your

1971
02:02:12.320 --> 02:02:15.880
word to get to know you more to grow in intimacy with you,

1972
02:02:15.880 --> 02:02:21.200
Father. And we just thank you Lord for bringing life to every

1973
02:02:21.200 --> 02:02:24.320
dead situation. And Lord, we just thank you for resurrection

1974
02:02:24.320 --> 02:02:27.920
power in the midst of every person's situation that we

1975
02:02:27.920 --> 02:02:31.320
talked about or even didn't hear about tonight. But God, you know

1976
02:02:31.320 --> 02:02:34.920
all of it. So Lord come into those places and minister life

1977
02:02:34.920 --> 02:02:38.800
minister healing we place the balm of Gilead upon every wound

1978
02:02:38.960 --> 02:02:43.360
and Jesus name. Amen. God bless you all. I will see you in the

1979
02:02:43.360 --> 02:02:47.960
groups. Have a good night, everyone. Thank you. Good night.