WEBVTT

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All right, ladies, we've got, do I still have, I still have 11 of you on.

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It is Tuesday, August 19th.

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This is your one o'clock check-in.

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It's so good to see you all.

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Okay, awesome.

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Sandra Grace, you're Sandy Palmer.

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Awesome.

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Sandra Palmer.

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Perfect.

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Y'all, do y'all realize we have a lot of Sandys, Sandys and Sandras.

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And I was just going over all of this and I'm like, I hope I don't start merging them

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like trying to figure out like who's who and who's got what situation.

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So I definitely was looking over that and I definitely want to unpack if you're available,

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the situation that you are having surface.

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So that's good.

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Awesome.

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Laura is going to the retreat.

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I'm so excited.

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Yes, all of her events should be on her website.

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Ladies, make sure that you're checking out our resource page because that's going to

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have a lot of information.

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I did just check it out.

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I don't see the anniversary party on there.

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So I'm going to actually, let me make a note right now to reach out to the team and just

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ask about that and see if we are making sure that we're putting it up in our love story

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accelerator where you ladies are at as well.

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Sam, so good to see you.

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Welcome.

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It's your first time.

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You're in the Dallas Fort Worth area as well.

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Me too.

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Where in Dallas?

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I just moved here in January.

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So I have an apartment right by SMU in Lower Greenville.

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In where?

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Lower Greenville, SMU area.

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SMU, SMU.

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It's like in Dallas.

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In Dallas.

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Okay.

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See, I'm in the North, like the North side of Dallas.

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So like Frisco, Little Elm.

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Yeah.

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You're North of me by about 45 minutes.

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Yeah.

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I know.

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Like that was the one thing when I first moved here, I'm like, oh my goodness, Dallas is

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like two hours away from Dallas.

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It takes forever to get anywhere in Dallas.

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The traffic is horrible.

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Yeah.

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And then we've got the World Cup coming in 2026.

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So watch out.

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Traffic's going to get worse.

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What?

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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I heard about that recently.

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That's probably going to be in the Frisco area, isn't it?

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Probably.

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Yeah, because we got the Frisco Star, all of that stuff.

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Oh, Lord.

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They better get this construction fixed.

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My husband's always like, oh, Florida traffic is horrible.

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And I'm like, what are you talking about?

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Dallas traffic is worse.

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But he worked from home for a really long time.

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And now I like push him out to go to the office.

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He gets more done that way.

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So now he's getting a little taste of it and our kids are no longer homeschooled.

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So we have to get out in the traffic every week.

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All right.

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All right.

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Enough about that.

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It's so good to have you ladies here.

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I know we're like 10 minutes, like now coming up on 10 minutes, but I want to introduce

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myself.

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I'm Carla Johnson.

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I am one of your last year single dating heartwork coaches here in Love Story Accelerator along

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with Ebony.

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She does the evening ones.

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I do the afternoon ones.

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We tag team.

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So I do want to let you ladies know if you can't make the evening call, definitely watch

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it in replay.

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And then if you're ever watching the evening call and you can't make this one, watch this

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replay.

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And if you can't make either, watch both replays.

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And the reason I say that is because this is where we are going to take all your questions.

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They can be dating questions.

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They can be artwork questions.

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They can be all sorts of things like what is God revealing to you?

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Questions about the content.

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Anything.

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Okay.

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That's what we're here for.

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We're here to be your like wing woman.

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We're here to be your cheerleader.

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All sorts of stuff.

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And then I always share with you ladies, I will be your number one cheerleader, but I

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will also be your girlfriend that will tell you what you need to hear, not always what

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you want to hear.

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Okay.

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My ladies that have been here for a little while know what I mean.

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And I promise it's not scary.

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We're here about getting breakthrough and helping you unlock what God has for you in

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your love story, but not just your love story.

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Like what is God doing in your life in general?

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One of the biggest blessings of this community was that it grew my intimacy with the Lord

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tremendously.

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And there were so many blessings that came from this community.

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The husband was just the cherry on top.

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And then this community just continues to pour in and bless me significantly just by

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being able to share.

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the wisdom and knowledge that I've gained.

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A lot of times when I'm sharing things with you,

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it actually helps me as well with what's going on in my life.

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That's why I also want to encourage you ladies,

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check out Supernatural Saturday.

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It will change your life every week, I promise you.

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Definitely make sure that you're listening to that as well.

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Do I have anybody else new besides my girl Sam here in the Dallas area?

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Is anybody else brand new?

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I see Helen, Megan, and Kim,

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I'm guessing you have questions and then I know Sandra,

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I'm going to have her jump in the seat too because she's got a lot of

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good stuff and we want to help her get some breakthrough as well.

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Yes, Mary, deeper intimacy, yes.

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Mary, is this your last call with us before you shift over?

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Yeah. I know I didn't want to and I was like,

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oh Lord, I don't want to,

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but I do have a sense that I'm going,

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time, it's time.

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It's time, it is,

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and you're going to love it over there.

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I know as much as Ebony and myself,

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we love it when you-all are here.

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It does get us a little sad when we have to see you go,

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but it actually makes our heart really joyful too because believe it or not,

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I still see what's going on in phase 3.

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When you-all post in phase 3,

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I still have eyes on you.

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I may not always be able to respond because I have a lot of work in here to do,

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but I do try my best to keep up-to-date with you-all.

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Is it Ayla?

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Am I pronouncing that name right from Florida?

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You can unmute. I don't want to mispronounce your name.

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Yes, it's Ayla.

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It's what?

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Ayla.

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Ayla. Okay, perfect.

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I will make note of that so I don't keep making a mistake.

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I think I responded to you in the app and you had questions about dating as a single mama.

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Yes. Thank you.

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Well, I was a single mama,

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so I have feedback on that.

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Make sure you put your hand up so that we can dive into that as well.

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When I get ready and take questions,

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before I do, let's do some activations for this week.

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I know we have gotten a little off course on those activations.

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I definitely want to make sure that you ladies are watching Supernatural Saturday.

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Make sure that you're doing that.

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For this upcoming week,

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I'm actually going to read something that I saw Jackie post today on her social media.

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It really, really spoke to me and something that I see

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frequently in our community here.

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It really was on my heart to utilize this because it's just really good.

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Today, Jackie posted, it says,

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healthy attraction asks, how do they treat me?

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Obsessive attraction only asks,

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how do they make me feel?

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Ladies, we're females.

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We have all the feelings.

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I noticed that often is that we

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typically will go off of our feelings and our emotions,

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which is not a bad thing.

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Feelings and emotions are God-given.

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But we have to remember is that feelings aren't always fact.

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When you ladies are posting in the community and you're on

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these dates and things are starting to surface,

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we have to be mindful of what our thoughts are and what

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our feelings are and really spend time with Holy Spirit in that.

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Now, I'm going to read what she actually posted.

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That was her little photo thing.

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I don't know what I'm saying.

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But she said, here's the truth.

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Your feelings can lie to you.

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They can be rooted in past trauma,

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unmet means, or toxic patterns you've normalized.

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That's why judging a relationship by butterflies alone is dangerous.

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This is not to scare you,

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it literally is just to get you thinking as when things surface.

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Because if you ladies are new here,

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if you go into the app and you see the Ask the Coach questions,

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and you read what our responses are,

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oftentimes myself and Ebony are going to ask you deeper heart things.

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Where do you think this is surfacing?

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That's just to get you thinking,

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are you responding from a trauma or are you responding in?

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how God is showing up and that being God-defended and God-protected okay so

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instead of looking at their behavior okay because that will happen ladies

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these men they don't have they don't have coaches they don't have a Jackie

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they don't have a Carla they don't have an Ebony so sometimes they don't get it

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right y'all my husband didn't get it right you know my husband when with

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questions and told me some of his trauma and I was just like okay I didn't hold

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it against him though I kind of was like okay I need to put up some boundaries

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here I need to make sure that I'm checking my heart and then I'm not

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getting pulled into his trauma I also to make sure I'm not pulling him into my

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trauma as well because we were strangers we're just getting to know each other

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and so I had to pace it accordingly okay and that's why I utilize this group

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even when I met someone that seems wonderful I had to make sure that I was

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you know coming to community and making sure that my heart was in check and I

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was going to the Lord I was spending time with the Lord you know really

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seeking him you know and being open and having my hands open to whatever it is

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that God wanted to do okay so instead this is instead of looking at their

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behavior look at this do they honor your boundaries they may not honor your

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boundaries right out the gate y'all because they don't know your boundaries

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okay now red flags for me is if they're rude and talking about sex they're

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demeaning okay like if they're if that's showing up that's to me that's a red

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flag again come to the community let us know how they're responding and myself

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and Ebony will let you know if that's a red flag or not okay if they're you know

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just yeah they're just not respecting boundaries whatsoever so they might push

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a boundary but are you putting up a like then are you communicating what that

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boundary is and if you after you do that are they respecting it they might say

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that they respect it and then a week later they kind of show up doing the

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same thing again that would be like mmm I don't like that you might have to like

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reaffirm your boundary and see if they're gonna keep trying to push on it

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okay so do they honor boundaries do they show up consistently now when you're in

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level one and level two that is going to look a little different okay they may

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have we don't know where they're at in their life they're still strangers we're

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still learning to get to know them but that's why come here we'll kind of help

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you pace through that so do they show up consistently or they like chat in your

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ear off for a week and then all of a sudden they like go MIA and then two

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weeks later they pop back up again and then they're going full throttle again

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and then all of a sudden they cut and run again like those that's not

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consistency okay now if something comes up for the first time and they kind of

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like disappear like you might subtly reach out but we're not gonna anxiously

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attach and keep like pushing okay let them take that lead as long as you've

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let them know that you're interested okay do their actions match their words

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ladies everyone puts their best foot forward okay their words are gonna say

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oh I'm this I'm this I'm this okay art you need to pace it okay before you

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start getting head-over-heels all right oh he says he loves God and he goes to

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church and he does all these things and you know he wants to have a relationship

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centered on the board just his actions show that okay I'm saying that because

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my son's father showed up in that way he had all of the right words and then

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the actions kind of started crumbling and I didn't see it because by then I

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had already invested myself I crossed physical boundaries I then got pregnant

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y'all so now I'm pregnant with a kid and this guy is showing all sorts of red

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flags I didn't want to see him though because I was in a situation okay so

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that's why we talked to you ladies about pacing it don't put the cart

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before the horse okay really see do their actions match their words and then

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do you feel safe being your full self with them that's important okay and it

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takes typically a couple dates for you to kind of like feel comfortable I mean

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we get those like

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first date, sometimes second date jitters. All right. Allow

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that process to naturally happen. Okay? We don't have to

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have all the butterflies out the gate on that first date. How

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did they show up? Okay. So love isn't about how someone

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activates your nervous system. It's about how they care for

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your heart. All right. So that was Jackie's post today. It

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starts thinking, come to the community. I want to hear what

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qualities and characteristics do you find attractive in men? So

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before just listing them off, I really want you to spend this

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week. Go out and get to know men. Smile at them. Ask them

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for help. How do men show up? Observe them. You might not even

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have to see them and they may not even have to interact with

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you. Watch them. How do they interact with other people? And

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what's attractive about it? All right. Look for the gold. Men

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are gold, just like we're gold. And I know I've shared this

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before with ladies in here several weeks ago, I asked a

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question. I asked some of you ladies, do you like men? Some of

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us struggled with that, because we've been hurt by men. God

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wants to come and redeem that. God didn't want you hurting. God

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created man and woman together. Right? All the way back in the

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day, God wanted us to be men. Right? And so if you haven't

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watched Divine Feminine yet, you'll be in for a treat. It's

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one of my favorite videos. So if you're brand new and you haven't

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seen that, no, don't rush to it. Don't rush through those videos.

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But you'll hear Jackie talk a little bit about the Divine

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Masculine as well. And so I want you ladies searching what makes

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a man a Divine Masculine man. Those are the qualities and

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not, you know, and you're looking for fruit. Does that

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make sense? Yes, Laura, I totally, totally get it. You

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know, I think a lot of women here would relate. You know,

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when we've been hurt by men, when you know, there were empty

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promises, all sorts of things, maybe our fathers weren't there

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for us, you know, all sorts of things. And so God wants to

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deem that and that's why this process of dating for discovery

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is that you're not just discovering what you like about

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men, but you're actually even discovering more about

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yourself. And God's going to start showing you areas where he

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wants to continue to heal your heart. Dating will do that. And

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it's nothing to be scared of. But it's actually like, it's an

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invitation. And when you can work through that, ladies, I

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will tell you, it will bring so much more fruit to your

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marriages to, you know, spend time don't, don't, don't ignore

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God's invitation to work on your heart in this in this season as

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well. And I know a lot of you came out of phase one out of

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heartwork. You're like, okay, the hard work is done. Yes and

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no. Okay, artwork you never graduate from. Okay, you just

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get upgrade. And they're good. They're really good. I promise.

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So something to keep in mind. All right. So be activating that

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this week. I want you ladies showing up in our community and

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letting us know what experiences you're having with men where

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you're seeing the gold. What is your Heavenly Father wants you

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to see about how he designed man, not the curses view of man,

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but God's divine purpose for man. Okay. And that can probably

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start helping break down some of those heart boxes and really

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start allowing you to open yourself up to the idea of

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dating because I know this dating thing. Whoo. I don't know

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about you all. But when I started doing it freaked me out.

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I had to work through some stuff. It took me a little a

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little time. But I'm here to tell you, like, there's the

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other side of it. And I promise you'll you'll get there. Okay.

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So let that be an encouragement to you. All right. For those of

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you that weren't maybe on I didn't click record quite early

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enough. But if you jumped in a little last

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here, I was sharing, you know, I joined this community five years ago, just about five

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years ago.

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So when Jackie's celebrating the five years anniversary, that's when I kind of was onboarded

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and into this community.

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And y'all, it took me about a little, a little over two years until I actually met my husband.

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Okay, it doesn't have to happen that, you know, it can happen super fast, but if it

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push back a little bit, we're going to ask you hard questions, but I don't want you to

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get discouraged if, you know, you've been in here for like, Oh, I've been in here for

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six months.

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Oh, I've been in here, you know, a year.

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Oh, I've been in here two years, y'all.

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I was there.

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I was like, I've been in here two years.

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Where is he?

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I promise God's timing is absolutely perfect because if I would have met my husband, like

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right when I joined this program, or even a year after I was in this program, I probably

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wouldn't have accepted the invitation.

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I wouldn't have been ready for him.

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My heart was not ready then.

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One, he was in Texas and I was in Florida and y'all, I was like, my non-negotiables,

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I'm not moving.

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Ladies, I live in Texas now.

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My heart had to be open and I really was like, okay, whatever God wants, I just need that.

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Like I had to release it.

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I had to supernaturally surrender and y'all, I was stubborn and I know some of you in here

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probably are stubborn too, all right?

347
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So I was stubborn and it took me a little longer to let God like take the wheel, right?

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We have that song, Jesus take the wheel, Carrie Underwood.

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Well, I was like, oh yeah, Jesus take the wheel and I'm like, nope, I want it back.

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Nope, give it back to me.

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So I know some of you are very similar like me, okay?

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If you're not, that's amazing.

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Keep giving that wheel up and don't take it back.

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I have a lesson or two to learn from you for sure because even now, sometimes I'm like,

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no, but I need it, I need the wheel.

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So I hope that gives encouragement to you ladies, but let's go ahead and dive in.

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We got about 45 minutes for questions.

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I am going to take Sandra, are you available to kind of come on, like what's happening

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now that you've spent some, a few days with the Lord?

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What's kind of being revealed to you?

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Can you hear me?

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Yes, I can.

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Okay.

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I can't tell if I'm visible.

365
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Okay, there I am.

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I've just been working it out with the Lord.

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I've talked to some people that I'm close to that I trust, like as far as like people

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that have been praying into it and praying with me.

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And at this point, I'm just letting it go and trying to just trust God.

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I still have a lot of disappointment, but I'm just trying to trust the Lord and His

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direction and take my hands off.

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I've just had a lot of disappointment in this area of feeling, I mean, I've, like I shared

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in my post, I feel like over, you know, I've learned to hear the Lord's voice very well

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over the years, but I just am a little confounded.

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Yeah.

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At 49, I'm still in this position.

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I just don't, I'm like, do I hear you?

378
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I don't know.

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I'm just a little confused.

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And what's kind of speaking to me right now is when we have those questions of, you know,

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contradiction, like, I don't know if I hear you.

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Do you think that that's from the Lord?

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Is God a God of confusion?

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No, He's not.

385
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No.

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So where do you think that's coming from?

387
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Oh, it's probably coming from me.

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So, yeah, we just have to, and that was one thing, I'm, oh, I got Holy Spirit chills right

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now.

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That was one thing that stood out to me, like when I was reading your post, and I've read

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through it a couple of times, I'm reading through it again right now, where what was

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on my heart was some of the things that you are saying that I'm wondering if it's blocking

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it a little bit, because your alignment is a little off.

394
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And what I mean is like, I'm not good at picking.

395
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Oh, I don't feel that way so much now.

396
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That's how I started my journey.

397
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Okay.

398
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That was part of my testimony of coming to the Lord.

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That was like 25 years ago.

400
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Okay.

401
00:24:56.560 --> 00:24:59.860
And I've, that's how I felt, you know.

402
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:03.000
I just released it to the Lord that he would get to pick.

403
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And it's been over the last few years

404
00:25:05.660 --> 00:25:09.640
that I felt like the Lord has told me I get to pick.

405
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But obviously, yeah.

406
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Okay, that was, I'm hoping you get to partner.

407
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Ladies, you get to partner with God.

408
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He's gonna give you the choice too.

409
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That's what free will is all about.

410
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And he's not gonna give you scraps.

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And I think that's why I asked you originally,

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do you believe that your father is a giver of good gifts

413
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and that you deserve good gifts,

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not because of what you do or don't do,

415
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just because he's a good father?

416
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Yeah, I'm working through that.

417
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I feel that, I do believe that,

418
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but just this area of my life has been pretty disappointing.

419
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Are there any things, so this is where

420
00:25:56.280 --> 00:25:58.900
this heartwork piece can come in,

421
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is you believe that in certain areas,

422
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but maybe you don't believe it in another area.

423
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So we gotta get to what past memories

424
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are you holding onto for things that happen

425
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or beliefs or lies that entered

426
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in those hurts and those traumas?

427
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And then you need to go to the Lord,

428
00:26:21.580 --> 00:26:24.040
okay, but what are you speaking to me about this?

429
00:26:25.000 --> 00:26:29.420
And again, ladies, like it doesn't have to be easy,

430
00:26:29.480 --> 00:26:31.800
it just has to be worth it, okay?

431
00:26:31.900 --> 00:26:33.280
Jackie says that a lot,

432
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and I'm telling you that's from the Lord, okay?

433
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Like everything in life isn't just gonna come easy.

434
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We have trials and tribulations.

435
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It just has to be worth it.

436
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And so when we recognize those areas

437
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where we're maybe having responses from our past

438
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or doubts or fears, or we're aligning with this,

439
00:27:01.820 --> 00:27:04.340
I'm not enough, I'm not good enough,

440
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I wasn't chosen, I'm always overlooked.

441
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Those are the thoughts that we have to hold captive.

442
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Those are old patterns

443
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and we're trying to break those patterns.

444
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It doesn't mean that all of a sudden,

445
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like we've done this heartwork

446
00:27:20.360 --> 00:27:21.420
and those things are gonna go away.

447
00:27:21.420 --> 00:27:23.300
Those still come and they'll creep in.

448
00:27:24.780 --> 00:27:27.840
Now we get to utilize these heartwork tools

449
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to recognize them sooner rather than later,

450
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and then take them captive

451
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and remind ourselves what's God's truth here.

452
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And start looking for what God is doing

453
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and not where you were at before.

454
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Does that make sense?

455
00:27:47.080 --> 00:27:48.660
So that's where I want,

456
00:27:48.660 --> 00:27:51.100
so this thought process of,

457
00:27:51.420 --> 00:27:53.460
I think you were sharing about a guy

458
00:27:53.460 --> 00:27:56.380
that you met on missions and you were torn back and forth,

459
00:27:56.640 --> 00:28:01.000
and then you felt like God was pointing you,

460
00:28:01.160 --> 00:28:02.240
no, this isn't him.

461
00:28:02.400 --> 00:28:04.900
And then all of a sudden, like a few years later,

462
00:28:04.920 --> 00:28:08.740
you see that he's married with kids, right?

463
00:28:09.580 --> 00:28:12.020
Well, there was a process to that, yeah.

464
00:28:12.020 --> 00:28:16.300
I knew that was, I prayed for him to find that.

465
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Because I knew the Lord said no to me.

466
00:28:20.000 --> 00:28:23.040
Of course we do, but it's not gonna sting.

467
00:28:24.320 --> 00:28:26.020
Oh no, it did not feel good.

468
00:28:26.540 --> 00:28:27.960
Yeah, it's gonna sting a little bit.

469
00:28:28.160 --> 00:28:30.220
So that's what I just want you to press in

470
00:28:30.220 --> 00:28:36.020
even a little more, just what past memories,

471
00:28:36.220 --> 00:28:39.480
like where did this feel similar?

472
00:28:40.860 --> 00:28:43.020
I mean, maybe we go back to our childhood.

473
00:28:43.620 --> 00:28:45.600
Maybe that first time we felt this way

474
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was back in our childhood.

475
00:28:46.640 --> 00:28:48.480
And maybe it's that invitation

476
00:28:48.480 --> 00:28:50.720
that the Lord wants to highlight to us

477
00:28:50.720 --> 00:28:52.860
because he's gonna come in and he's gonna redeem

478
00:28:53.380 --> 00:28:56.300
some of those past hurts and traumas.

479
00:28:56.660 --> 00:29:00.080
And he's gonna reveal where he was in those moments

480
00:29:00.420 --> 00:29:03.900
and what his truth is,

481
00:29:03.900 --> 00:29:08.360
not what the enemy used to lie to us in those moments.

482
00:29:08.960 --> 00:29:10.940
Does that help, Sandra?

483
00:29:11.140 --> 00:29:13.340
Sorry, I was looking at Laura's name.

484
00:29:14.040 --> 00:29:15.220
Does that help?

485
00:29:15.960 --> 00:29:18.300
I think, I definitely feel like

486
00:29:18.300 --> 00:29:20.020
I've been sitting with the Lord more.

487
00:29:20.180 --> 00:29:24.300
I really felt I got some actual deliverance yesterday.

488
00:29:25.040 --> 00:29:28.620
Well, actually this just within the last couple of days,

489
00:29:28.920 --> 00:29:33.220
but it does, I know where it's happened before

490
00:29:33.680 --> 00:29:37.260
as far as what I've shared a little bit about

491
00:29:37.640 --> 00:29:41.160
like just releasing things when the Lord's asked me to.

492
00:29:41.160 --> 00:29:45.120
Because I obviously want what he has for me.

493
00:29:45.540 --> 00:29:46.280
Have you done-

494
00:29:46.280 --> 00:29:47.260
I don't-

495
00:29:47.260 --> 00:29:47.940
Go ahead, sorry.

496
00:29:48.420 --> 00:29:51.680
Yeah, I've done the forgiveness of like,

497
00:29:51.680 --> 00:29:55.180
I've walked through the forgiveness with even the Lord,

498
00:29:55.280 --> 00:29:56.980
just things that I've had in my heart

499
00:29:56.980 --> 00:29:59.460
where I felt like he let me down and-

500
00:29:59.460 --> 00:29:59.760
Yeah.

501
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:04.620
And I've walked through that, through this process, and also recently.

502
00:30:05.760 --> 00:30:12.060
And, but I just, I like, as far as back before, even then, I don't know, like, I'm like, where,

503
00:30:12.440 --> 00:30:18.120
what could that be? Maybe it is. Maybe it is there. And I just haven't actually looked that far back.

504
00:30:19.000 --> 00:30:23.420
Yeah. Well, I don't want you to get caught up in, in all of the past. Okay. I mean,

505
00:30:23.420 --> 00:30:27.600
it's good to look back there, but I'm also sensing Holy Spirit is also wanting me to

506
00:30:27.800 --> 00:30:36.240
you. Be in the here and now enjoy life now. Right. And that's, that goes for all of you ladies.

507
00:30:39.240 --> 00:30:43.440
Like while you're waiting, like, not like, and I hate to, I hate to use the word weight,

508
00:30:43.440 --> 00:30:47.240
like while you're preparing it there, while you're preparing for your spirit mate,

509
00:30:47.780 --> 00:30:52.400
your life doesn't have to be on hold. You know, Ebony, if you've ever heard,

510
00:30:52.540 --> 00:30:56.480
been on one of Ebony's calls like Ebony will share with you. And then she's,

511
00:30:56.480 --> 00:31:00.360
she's done this activation with the ladies before where she's like, ladies enjoy your

512
00:31:00.360 --> 00:31:04.900
single life. Like start, you know, roll over in your bed because at some point

513
00:31:04.960 --> 00:31:08.240
there's going to be someone there and you're not going to have your bed all to yourself.

514
00:31:09.040 --> 00:31:15.240
And I can, can, you know, share that. I, I got testimony y'all like it's different.

515
00:31:16.520 --> 00:31:22.840
So enjoy your life and you're here and now, and enjoy those moments. And, um,

516
00:31:22.840 --> 00:31:28.220
I, I'm like being drawn to you right now because I, like, I remember and recall

517
00:31:28.600 --> 00:31:34.500
where I was at when I was single and I was a single mom. And it was really important for me

518
00:31:34.500 --> 00:31:41.360
and my here and now to enjoy my son in that moment, because when I got married and gained

519
00:31:41.360 --> 00:31:48.320
some more children, I never like, that was, that was part of the past that I'm like, I enjoyed it

520
00:31:48.320 --> 00:31:54.980
in the moment because now it's different. And it's, it's bittersweet. It's like, I sometimes

521
00:31:54.980 --> 00:31:59.280
look back and you're like, Oh, those were such good moments, but I'm so thankful for what I have

522
00:32:00.100 --> 00:32:06.980
now. Okay. And so be in the present moment as well. Still go out and live life, enjoy life,

523
00:32:07.040 --> 00:32:12.300
go do things with friends, family, all sorts of things. All right. What I really want to encourage

524
00:32:12.300 --> 00:32:18.540
you ladies is don't allow the dating to consume your life. We want you out dating, but we don't

525
00:32:18.540 --> 00:32:24.760
want it to get to the point where it's all that's on your mind. Cause that will get overwhelming,

526
00:32:26.040 --> 00:32:30.140
especially ladies. Like if you're like, Oh, if this online dating thing, I like, and you're

527
00:32:30.140 --> 00:32:34.940
constantly having to swipe and message and all that, it will get overwhelming. You have to

528
00:32:34.940 --> 00:32:41.360
balance it. You have to give yourself boundaries on the dating. All right. We don't want you working

529
00:32:41.360 --> 00:32:48.100
it like a job. It, it, it needs to be enjoyable. And if it's not, then come here, let's figure out

530
00:32:48.100 --> 00:32:53.340
why it's not enjoyable. And let's try to help give you some tools and resources and some boundaries

531
00:32:53.340 --> 00:33:04.860
that will help make it more enjoyable. Okay. Kathy, you had she's, she's got a long distance

532
00:33:05.120 --> 00:33:10.540
relationship. Not really. I mean, it's long distance. She's level one, right? You haven't,

533
00:33:10.540 --> 00:33:16.120
or have you had a video call with this man? No, that'll be like, next we have, we've had

534
00:33:16.280 --> 00:33:20.680
a couple of chats. One was 30 minutes. He just, I feels to me like he's trying to rush

535
00:33:21.000 --> 00:33:25.020
kind of like I was rushed before. So I'm kind of having PTSD from Bob. He's rushing

536
00:33:26.260 --> 00:33:30.300
to, I mean, like, I feel like we have a connection and I'm like, talk to him for

537
00:33:30.300 --> 00:33:34.520
30 minutes. He was wanting to know what my love languages are. And I'm like, yeah, stop. I mean,

538
00:33:34.520 --> 00:33:42.380
I just, I did the, I just told him, I said, you know, I haven't had a serious relationship,

539
00:33:42.560 --> 00:33:45.540
but over 10 years, I'm, you know, the love language thing. I'd love to dig,

540
00:33:45.980 --> 00:33:49.220
dig into that again. I said, I'm not even sure what they are now. I presume they're the same,

541
00:33:49.440 --> 00:33:56.940
but I don't, I don't feel comfortable sharing that yet. So I, you said, Hey, I'm not sharing

542
00:33:57.120 --> 00:34:04.160
that. He just said, I can tell you, cause it was just yesterday. Okay. And then he keeps sending

543
00:34:04.160 --> 00:34:08.580
me pictures of him as a younger man, like with a muscle shirt on and stuff, because I can tell

544
00:34:08.580 --> 00:34:13.159
they're not normal. Cause I'm 65 and he's 61 and he's got gray hair now, but he's a very attractive

545
00:34:13.199 --> 00:34:18.880
man. So that always bothers me. He just said, I mean, is it significantly younger? Like if he's

546
00:34:18.880 --> 00:34:24.400
how old did you say he is? Well, he's 61. So for me, no, it's not, he's fine. He's got younger

547
00:34:24.400 --> 00:34:29.840
children. They're like 18 and 20. So he started pretty late. So my son is 30, you know, and I

548
00:34:29.840 --> 00:34:35.460
started late, but, and that's fine. He's, he is more than happy to move. He's looking for his

549
00:34:35.460 --> 00:34:40.420
wife. He was on arc. I said, how did you find arc? He said, he Googled it and found a Christian

550
00:34:40.420 --> 00:34:44.800
dating site. So he's actively a Christian. I don't know where he stands and any of that.

551
00:34:45.600 --> 00:34:49.739
So he would just said, he goes, I really enjoy talking with you and I'm looking forward to

552
00:34:49.739 --> 00:34:54.100
talking again. I would like to think there's a connection that is forming, but I guess time will

553
00:34:54.100 --> 00:34:58.380
tell. It'd be nice to be able to meet you sometime soon. So I didn't know if that meant in person or

554
00:34:58.380 --> 00:34:59.320
by video.

555
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:11.460
Got a video. I've got to figure out the video because I'm 65 and I've got to figure out if we can do zoom or he doesn't have an iPhone. So should I become a friend on Facebook so that we could message that way.

556
00:35:12.280 --> 00:35:14.040
I'm just trying to figure that out.

557
00:35:15.600 --> 00:35:18.760
Um, I would, I would suggest zoom

558
00:35:18.760 --> 00:35:42.440
Okay, because we have, I mean, everybody has a free version of zoom. And the cool thing about zoom, I think it's still the same is you can set up a zoom link, like a meeting link, right? I I'm correct me if I'm wrong for any of you ladies, but I think you're only allowed to have a 40 minute call, which is perfect because you don't want to be on these calls for more than an hour.

559
00:35:43.520 --> 00:35:48.440
All right. And then, um, and he doesn't have an iPhone. Okay. Um,

560
00:35:48.760 --> 00:35:57.520
So like, I'm on zoom now, but I'm on my iPad, but I don't physically know how to look into the camera. Is this in the camera because there's a little dot here. And that's how

561
00:35:57.520 --> 00:35:58.500
Can you see yourself?

562
00:35:58.900 --> 00:36:04.260
I can see myself. Yeah. But when I see myself now I look like I'm looking to the side.

563
00:36:04.660 --> 00:36:08.540
And I know I do that too. And then I sit here and I'm always looking around at all you ladies.

564
00:36:09.300 --> 00:36:14.740
And I don't really have a good way to do it on a computer because I don't have a camera on a computer that I could use.

565
00:36:14.740 --> 00:36:30.960
Well, and just remember, like when you're on zoom, like right now we have, how many do we have on where there's, there's 16 of us on. So you're probably your attention is probably drawn between a lot of different people. So you are going to look, but if his face is there, it's just going to be his face.

566
00:36:31.440 --> 00:36:31.960
Right.

567
00:36:32.300 --> 00:36:39.320
And so it will, it will look a little easier. Okay. And then, yeah, the little dot is your camera.

568
00:36:39.320 --> 00:36:46.240
Okay, definitely shared. So if you're looking into that, but I'm a person where I'm like looking because I'm looking at you right now.

569
00:36:47.120 --> 00:36:58.300
And so that's where my focus is, but it might not look like I'm looking at you, but I am. Okay, so just keep that in mind. Don't, don't, don't put so much emphasis on that.

570
00:36:58.800 --> 00:37:03.900
But you can just, you know, set up your own zoom link. I don't know, since now that we're on

571
00:37:04.460 --> 00:37:09.580
I'll have to Google that. I can Google that. I've seen videos. I'll just, I can research it. It's just, yeah.

572
00:37:09.580 --> 00:37:21.300
And then you just send it to him and then you send him the password and then he can jump on. You guys just schedule a time. I would definitely suggest that. One thing that I will say that I feel necessary to share.

573
00:37:23.180 --> 00:37:28.180
When men are looking for wives and they're marriage minded, they

574
00:37:29.640 --> 00:37:40.060
It may feel exhilarated. It's just really important to communicate. Hey, I, I'm really flattered that you're really excited.

575
00:37:40.480 --> 00:37:49.760
I need to take this a little slow. If that would be okay. Can we just slow the pace down a little bit. I really have been enjoying getting to know you.

576
00:37:49.760 --> 00:38:02.120
I want to continue to get to know you. I agree. I would love to get to meet you soon. How about we set up a video chat and we do that for a little while. And then if we still feel like, you know,

577
00:38:03.040 --> 00:38:11.620
We'd like to get to know each other more than maybe we can look at our calendars and set something up for the future to meet in person within like the next three to six weeks.

578
00:38:11.700 --> 00:38:18.960
Right. Well, he is in North Carolina and I'm in Kansas. So, and I've got a trip going to Savannah, Georgia in October, so I don't really

579
00:38:19.760 --> 00:38:22.660
Have a bunch of freedom to just jump on a plane and go meet him.

580
00:38:23.800 --> 00:38:28.120
Nor if he comes here. I don't want to turn into the situation like I had with Bob for two days.

581
00:38:28.340 --> 00:38:31.880
When you're when you're in Savannah. How far away is he from Savannah.

582
00:38:32.100 --> 00:38:35.180
I don't have any idea. I didn't haven't looked at that yet.

583
00:38:35.740 --> 00:38:43.700
Um, I mean, he might be able to come down there. I'm just going to be, you know, I just, I hate to give up my vacation time with my girls to meet a guy, but I guess I could, you know, for a day.

584
00:38:43.700 --> 00:38:55.780
Well, and that, but that would actually be perfect. And then you wouldn't not necessarily. I mean, I'm talking about your situation where Bob before like all your time and consumed all your time. Guess what, if you're on vacation with your girls, you get to have a boundary.

585
00:38:56.520 --> 00:39:09.560
Right. I am on vacation with my girls, but I'd be open for us, you know, meeting for an hour or two, if you'd be willing to drive, depending on how far that drive is, maybe you can meet halfway.

586
00:39:09.560 --> 00:39:16.120
If maybe he's four hours away, you drive to, he drives to you guys spend an hour or two together and then you drive back and you're only cut in half of a day.

587
00:39:16.540 --> 00:39:23.580
And then that's that, like your purpose of being there is to be on vacation with your girls.

588
00:39:24.100 --> 00:39:24.540
Right.

589
00:39:24.540 --> 00:39:29.840
And then I have to rent a car and all that. Cause we're not going to have, I don't know. I don't know. I'll think about it.

590
00:39:30.680 --> 00:39:36.920
Again, we don't have to have all the plans right ahead. Again, you can, you can throw ideas out there.

591
00:39:36.920 --> 00:39:42.480
It's just about getting ideas, seeing what works for the two of you. If it doesn't work for you, then you can share that.

592
00:39:43.360 --> 00:39:53.160
Um, how do you pace that? How do you know how to like today I asked, we'll chat today, but should I just, I mean, I just feel like we're so over the board talking about everything.

593
00:39:53.220 --> 00:39:59.640
I almost feel better for me if we would just hone in on a couple subjects and talk about those each time and just be.

594
00:40:00.680 --> 00:40:04.840
Like I said, long distance is going to accelerate things a little quicker.

595
00:40:04.980 --> 00:40:08.360
So it's going to feel, okay, it's going to feel exhilarated.

596
00:40:08.920 --> 00:40:15.260
So now my question to you is what's the anxious thoughts that are coming up?

597
00:40:16.340 --> 00:40:18.600
It's just that I'm projecting what happened before.

598
00:40:18.860 --> 00:40:20.020
I'm just working through that.

599
00:40:20.280 --> 00:40:20.640
It's okay.

600
00:40:20.660 --> 00:40:23.260
So that's what I want you to focus on.

601
00:40:23.500 --> 00:40:24.060
Okay.

602
00:40:24.440 --> 00:40:27.600
Remind yourself that was a past situation.

603
00:40:28.240 --> 00:40:29.500
I learned from it.

604
00:40:29.900 --> 00:40:32.120
This is what I'm going to do better this time.

605
00:40:32.540 --> 00:40:33.440
You're going to work on.

606
00:40:33.460 --> 00:40:34.440
You've said a lot of great things.

607
00:40:34.620 --> 00:40:38.080
I've got a lot of great notes and I've got some questions for him now that instead of

608
00:40:38.240 --> 00:40:42.120
being, why are you sending me pictures of yourself like 10 or 15 years ago?

609
00:40:42.180 --> 00:40:43.820
I was like, gosh, where'd you take that at?

610
00:40:44.040 --> 00:40:44.940
Where was that?

611
00:40:45.000 --> 00:40:45.680
Was that vacation?

612
00:40:46.140 --> 00:40:46.860
When was that?

613
00:40:46.980 --> 00:40:53.300
You know, instead of, so all that you've said already is helping me say, okay, let's find

614
00:40:53.300 --> 00:40:55.600
a better way to rephrase and discover.

615
00:40:56.660 --> 00:40:57.220
Yes.

616
00:40:59.500 --> 00:41:04.460
This is the process too, but yeah, I mean, going back to the long distance again, ladies

617
00:41:04.460 --> 00:41:10.360
don't, don't be alarmed if it feels accelerated, it will probably feel exhilarated, especially

618
00:41:10.700 --> 00:41:13.260
men that are, are looking for wives.

619
00:41:13.280 --> 00:41:13.800
Yes.

620
00:41:13.840 --> 00:41:14.340
He is.

621
00:41:14.340 --> 00:41:16.000
They're excited about it.

622
00:41:16.000 --> 00:41:16.340
Ladies.

623
00:41:16.780 --> 00:41:18.600
My husband was like that.

624
00:41:19.100 --> 00:41:24.100
He knew he wanted to get married again and I'm the type of, I was the type of girl,

625
00:41:24.100 --> 00:41:29.400
like when men kind of started out that way, like let that know, like I was running for

626
00:41:29.400 --> 00:41:35.140
the Hills and trust me, the first three weeks of like getting to know him, I was ready to

627
00:41:35.140 --> 00:41:35.760
cut and run.

628
00:41:36.920 --> 00:41:38.680
I was like, I don't know.

629
00:41:38.740 --> 00:41:40.020
There's some yellow flags here.

630
00:41:40.200 --> 00:41:45.560
There are some yellow flags, but Jackie's like, Carla, get off the ledge, go on a date.

631
00:41:46.180 --> 00:41:47.000
Just have fun.

632
00:41:47.000 --> 00:41:48.100
Get to know him.

633
00:41:48.420 --> 00:41:49.180
That's it.

634
00:41:49.180 --> 00:41:52.260
You're not, you know, marrying the man.

635
00:41:52.260 --> 00:41:56.820
If you don't want to, you don't even have to decide if you want to marry, marry him

636
00:41:56.820 --> 00:41:57.240
right away.

637
00:41:57.380 --> 00:42:01.560
And so I had to practice, you know, you know, holding boundaries.

638
00:42:02.020 --> 00:42:07.360
If he wanted to share something with me, you know, thanks for sharing that and then move

639
00:42:07.360 --> 00:42:08.300
on to another topic.

640
00:42:08.500 --> 00:42:09.960
I had to do all that stuff.

641
00:42:10.040 --> 00:42:10.480
Okay.

642
00:42:10.640 --> 00:42:16.340
But my husband knew he wanted to be married and he does too, and he couldn't move.

643
00:42:16.460 --> 00:42:17.760
So he's not opposed to moving.

644
00:42:17.760 --> 00:42:22.780
He's already said it's more important to find a wife and move to her and yeah.

645
00:42:23.120 --> 00:42:27.220
And so, you know, spend time, let's, let's not put the cart before the horse.

646
00:42:27.380 --> 00:42:27.700
Okay.

647
00:42:28.100 --> 00:42:32.580
Spend time getting to know him, look for the gold, right?

648
00:42:32.580 --> 00:42:34.400
What qualities do you like about him?

649
00:42:34.580 --> 00:42:34.980
Okay.

650
00:42:35.560 --> 00:42:39.960
Cause all of that other stuff, believe it or not, God will sort it out.

651
00:42:40.680 --> 00:42:41.160
Right.

652
00:42:41.160 --> 00:42:43.580
I mean, I can tell you my story.

653
00:42:44.040 --> 00:42:45.060
I didn't want to move.

654
00:42:46.260 --> 00:42:50.240
And then I met this man and we were getting to know each other.

655
00:42:50.260 --> 00:42:56.500
We decided to be exclusive and I'm like, okay, we're exclusive knowing that we're both looking

656
00:42:56.500 --> 00:42:57.280
for marriage.

657
00:42:57.960 --> 00:43:01.720
What's this even look like when we live in two different places, right?

658
00:43:01.720 --> 00:43:06.840
We have kids, you know, in my mind I was like, well, his dad is here.

659
00:43:07.920 --> 00:43:13.360
His children don't have a mother, so he might be more apt to come here because it's not

660
00:43:13.360 --> 00:43:16.160
like there's parents sharing or anything like that.

661
00:43:16.660 --> 00:43:25.000
I, my son saw his dad, but we didn't have parent sharing like by the courts, but he

662
00:43:25.000 --> 00:43:27.260
was still in his life, but not significantly.

663
00:43:28.020 --> 00:43:28.580
Okay.

664
00:43:29.020 --> 00:43:37.560
And so turns out once we started getting to know each other and we talked with, then we

665
00:43:37.560 --> 00:43:39.600
started talking about like, okay, what's this going to look like?

666
00:43:39.600 --> 00:43:43.980
My husband was like, well, I want to stay in Texas.

667
00:43:44.280 --> 00:43:45.640
I would want you to move here.

668
00:43:46.640 --> 00:43:48.600
And I was like, whoa, okay.

669
00:43:49.520 --> 00:43:55.020
You know, myself did not want to do that, but I had a weird piece about it.

670
00:43:55.160 --> 00:43:58.060
And I'm like, okay, I need some time to process this.

671
00:43:58.120 --> 00:44:05.340
Y'all the next day, my son's father called me up to tell me he was moving out of the

672
00:44:05.340 --> 00:44:05.680
state.

673
00:44:07.080 --> 00:44:09.100
I didn't do any of that.

674
00:44:09.780 --> 00:44:12.500
God's like, girl, I already got you.

675
00:44:12.960 --> 00:44:14.180
I've already got this worked out.

676
00:44:14.500 --> 00:44:14.680
Oops, sorry.

677
00:44:14.680 --> 00:44:15.360
That was my alarm.

678
00:44:15.520 --> 00:44:17.720
My smoke detector batteries low.

679
00:44:20.480 --> 00:44:25.260
So yeah, like God was so involved in those details.

680
00:44:25.260 --> 00:44:30.340
Like he showed me confirmation and I didn't have to work it.

681
00:44:30.340 --> 00:44:32.260
I didn't have to stress about it.

682
00:44:32.820 --> 00:44:35.400
God just opened doors and let that happen.

683
00:44:35.580 --> 00:44:35.760
Okay.

684
00:44:35.760 --> 00:44:38.920
I'm not saying that it's going to naturally happen that easy.

685
00:44:39.460 --> 00:44:44.180
There may be some things that you'll have to process through, but I just want you to

686
00:44:44.180 --> 00:44:44.640
keep that in mind.

687
00:44:44.780 --> 00:44:46.600
I hope that does not keep going off.

688
00:44:48.700 --> 00:44:49.920
Because I don't think I can hear it.

689
00:44:49.920 --> 00:44:50.940
I can't hear it on my end.

690
00:44:51.120 --> 00:44:51.500
You can't hear it.

691
00:44:51.620 --> 00:44:52.340
Oh, praise the Lord.

692
00:44:52.460 --> 00:44:52.940
We're good there.

693
00:44:53.480 --> 00:44:54.380
Oh my goodness.

694
00:44:54.400 --> 00:44:55.280
That is so loud.

695
00:44:56.020 --> 00:44:59.800
It's funny because we were talking with a couple earlier this week about...

696
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:04.520
alarm detectors going off because the batteries and like joking about it and

697
00:45:04.520 --> 00:45:09.360
I'm like oh my word the fact that it just literally happened right now so

698
00:45:09.360 --> 00:45:12.540
that's a funny story for me to tell my husband and these people we're talking

699
00:45:12.540 --> 00:45:19.160
to but um so yeah just keep that in mind you don't I know it's really easy to

700
00:45:19.160 --> 00:45:24.700
project and get worried and ahead of ourselves like the what-if spend time

701
00:45:24.700 --> 00:45:30.100
in the present spend time in the moment okay come here let us know what what's

702
00:45:30.100 --> 00:45:33.860
happening and we'll help guide and direct you and seeing you know is if

703
00:45:33.860 --> 00:45:38.000
God's trying to reveal something to you if he's trying to you know get you to

704
00:45:38.000 --> 00:45:43.460
look at a certain area and to heal we'll be here for that okay you're welcome

705
00:45:44.920 --> 00:45:50.020
absolutely is Allah still on here hey girl

706
00:45:51.880 --> 00:46:02.960
so yes single mama it's a lot isn't it feels that way it is okay so tell me

707
00:46:02.960 --> 00:46:09.920
like what what's your biggest concern right now at this point in life probably

708
00:46:11.460 --> 00:46:21.640
finding time and not a lot of people want to date single moms for their more

709
00:46:21.640 --> 00:46:35.480
marry them yeah I can relate to that I want to challenge you a little bit okay

710
00:46:35.480 --> 00:46:41.000
you cool if I challenge you a little bit if I can do it I'm here with you

711
00:46:41.000 --> 00:46:46.680
okay just know I'm like I've been there okay and if you are hesitant about it

712
00:46:46.740 --> 00:46:50.720
like I'm not gonna be offended by it we're gonna we're just gonna help walk

713
00:46:50.720 --> 00:46:54.700
you through this okay and if you need time you need time that's totally okay

714
00:46:54.700 --> 00:47:02.880
as well I fully relate to this this thought that guys don't want to date me

715
00:47:02.880 --> 00:47:11.400
because I'm a mom and I'm a single mom I want you when that thought comes up I

716
00:47:12.200 --> 00:47:17.320
want you to remind yourself your spirit mate is not gonna reject you because

717
00:47:17.320 --> 00:47:24.540
you're a single mom there are men out there that are kinsmen redeemers that

718
00:47:24.540 --> 00:47:32.160
will love your children as their own and I say it because I have one okay

719
00:47:32.160 --> 00:47:36.420
I struggle with that too and let me tell you the enemy would want to come in

720
00:47:36.420 --> 00:47:41.700
and just remind me that no one wanted to date a single mom you know funny story

721
00:47:41.700 --> 00:47:46.080
is that you know I'm in this community and Jackie has men in her community as

722
00:47:46.400 --> 00:47:50.760
well and there was a man that was actually in my area like Sarasota

723
00:47:51.280 --> 00:47:55.880
Florida it's a it's not my demographic not a lot of people in their 30s not a

724
00:47:55.880 --> 00:47:59.900
lot of single men in their 30s and there was this one guy that was in her

725
00:47:59.900 --> 00:48:07.260
community and she's like hey you should she get to know this guy he was he my

726
00:48:07.260 --> 00:48:16.760
best friend actually knew who he was and then we go to our church like actually

727
00:48:16.760 --> 00:48:22.860
my church she was coming with me and she looks over and she sees the guy at my

728
00:48:22.860 --> 00:48:25.260
church I hadn't know he went to my church y'all

729
00:48:28.020 --> 00:48:33.700
do you know that he didn't want to date me because I was a single mom and I was

730
00:48:33.700 --> 00:48:36.020
like that made me angry y'all

731
00:48:38.320 --> 00:48:46.680
but I'll tell you I could have allowed that interaction to keep me stuck but I

732
00:48:46.680 --> 00:48:51.800
reminded myself that you know what God's just showing me that's not my husband

733
00:48:51.800 --> 00:48:59.320
and that's okay he's helping weed out the men for me I don't have to I don't

734
00:48:59.320 --> 00:49:06.080
have to go through the trouble so I know it stings I know it's frustrating but

735
00:49:06.080 --> 00:49:12.480
when those thoughts come in I really want you to challenge yourself to

736
00:49:12.480 --> 00:49:19.420
listen to what God's truth is he's got someone out there that's going

737
00:49:19.420 --> 00:49:25.800
to love your children the way they would love their own children like my

738
00:49:25.800 --> 00:49:32.320
son calls my husband dad like he's more of a dad to my son than his biological

739
00:49:33.800 --> 00:49:36.580
father he spends more time with him I mean

740
00:49:36.580 --> 00:49:41.080
obviously his dad's in Michigan and we're here in Texas but even when he was

741
00:49:41.080 --> 00:49:45.100
living 45 minutes away from his son do you know when I was dating my husband

742
00:49:45.100 --> 00:49:51.420
and he was traveling to come visit me he had been to more baseball games in

743
00:49:52.060 --> 00:49:58.500
one season than his actual biological father had been in two baseball seasons

744
00:49:58.740 --> 00:49:59.980
my husband

745
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.300
had gone to like four baseball games

746
00:50:03.320 --> 00:50:05.660
in his second season of baseball

747
00:50:06.700 --> 00:50:09.160
and his dad had only been to one.

748
00:50:11.160 --> 00:50:14.240
And then finally, before he moved to Michigan,

749
00:50:14.320 --> 00:50:15.880
he came to a second one.

750
00:50:15.980 --> 00:50:18.340
My husband had already been to

751
00:50:18.340 --> 00:50:19.800
double the amount of baseball games

752
00:50:21.140 --> 00:50:23.600
because he showed up and he made time for him.

753
00:50:24.600 --> 00:50:28.740
So I want to help you break off this

754
00:50:28.740 --> 00:50:30.140
nobody wants to date a single mom.

755
00:50:30.840 --> 00:50:32.280
Because that's not true, there is.

756
00:50:32.420 --> 00:50:32.860
And guess what?

757
00:50:32.900 --> 00:50:33.680
It only takes one.

758
00:50:35.620 --> 00:50:37.000
All you need is your spirit mate.

759
00:50:38.020 --> 00:50:38.600
And guess what?

760
00:50:39.040 --> 00:50:40.960
He wants to date you because you have kids.

761
00:50:42.940 --> 00:50:47.620
God's speaking to his heart about being a bonus father.

762
00:50:48.420 --> 00:50:50.380
Maybe he's got kids too, who knows?

763
00:50:52.680 --> 00:50:56.920
You know, God picked me to be my kid's mom too.

764
00:50:57.540 --> 00:51:00.360
So they lost their mom in heaven, to heaven.

765
00:51:01.860 --> 00:51:04.120
And God's like, you're their mom.

766
00:51:05.800 --> 00:51:07.280
You know, I can't sit here and tell you

767
00:51:07.280 --> 00:51:08.660
it's been an easy road, it's not.

768
00:51:10.120 --> 00:51:12.040
But God is coming to redeem

769
00:51:12.520 --> 00:51:14.160
and he's gonna do that for you too.

770
00:51:15.000 --> 00:51:18.440
So I want to encourage you with that, okay?

771
00:51:18.660 --> 00:51:20.900
If God can do it for me, he's gonna do it for you.

772
00:51:22.500 --> 00:51:22.940
All right?

773
00:51:22.940 --> 00:51:26.900
As far as this finding time, I get it.

774
00:51:27.880 --> 00:51:31.100
Does your kids, do they see their dad?

775
00:51:31.600 --> 00:51:32.180
Do you have one?

776
00:51:32.300 --> 00:51:33.420
How many kids do you have, actually?

777
00:51:34.380 --> 00:51:34.680
I mean.

778
00:51:34.680 --> 00:51:36.040
I have three children.

779
00:51:36.640 --> 00:51:37.340
Three kids, okay.

780
00:51:37.960 --> 00:51:40.620
And they haven't seen their dad in three years.

781
00:51:40.680 --> 00:51:41.180
Okay.

782
00:51:42.480 --> 00:51:46.180
Do you have any family, friends, church community

783
00:51:47.620 --> 00:51:49.540
that you can lean on?

784
00:51:49.940 --> 00:51:51.020
I have church.

785
00:51:51.040 --> 00:51:52.320
I don't have any family here,

786
00:51:52.320 --> 00:51:58.080
but the way it is, it's just me handling it all.

787
00:51:58.860 --> 00:51:58.860


788
00:51:59.200 --> 00:52:00.800
Where in Florida are you?

789
00:52:01.620 --> 00:52:01.800
Sarasota.

790
00:52:02.600 --> 00:52:03.240
Are you really?

791
00:52:03.520 --> 00:52:03.900
Yes.

792
00:52:04.720 --> 00:52:05.760
Get out.

793
00:52:06.320 --> 00:52:07.020
I can't.

794
00:52:07.520 --> 00:52:07.860
I can't.

795
00:52:07.900 --> 00:52:11.520
I was so blessed to get a house last year here

796
00:52:11.820 --> 00:52:13.000
from the Habitat.

797
00:52:14.340 --> 00:52:17.280
We gonna get you a community to help you out with those kids

798
00:52:17.280 --> 00:52:19.060
because I couldn't be a single mom

799
00:52:19.360 --> 00:52:21.180
if I didn't have that community there.

800
00:52:23.800 --> 00:52:25.160
What church do you go to?

801
00:52:26.440 --> 00:52:27.260
Suncoast Community Church.

802
00:52:27.720 --> 00:52:28.060
Okay.

803
00:52:28.460 --> 00:52:29.840
Do you know my son?

804
00:52:29.960 --> 00:52:32.520
My youngest son went to the Suncoast Academy there.

805
00:52:33.200 --> 00:52:34.300
He's getting our first grade year.

806
00:52:35.020 --> 00:52:35.260
Yes.

807
00:52:36.860 --> 00:52:36.900
That's awesome.

808
00:52:38.160 --> 00:52:38.680
Wow.

809
00:52:39.180 --> 00:52:39.900
What a small world.

810
00:52:40.420 --> 00:52:42.540
I'm getting goosebumps right now.

811
00:52:43.860 --> 00:52:45.120
Cause we're gonna get,

812
00:52:45.700 --> 00:52:47.520
there's so many people in that area.

813
00:52:47.740 --> 00:52:51.060
And like, I mean, I've lived there for 15 years.

814
00:52:51.900 --> 00:52:55.500
So we're gonna find you community

815
00:52:55.500 --> 00:53:00.180
so that you can feel safe to go on dates

816
00:53:00.180 --> 00:53:02.220
because your kids are gonna be cared for

817
00:53:02.220 --> 00:53:06.260
and you can take a night off and go have a date.

818
00:53:07.720 --> 00:53:09.220
How do you feel about that?

819
00:53:09.440 --> 00:53:10.600
Does that scare you a little bit?

820
00:53:11.540 --> 00:53:12.680
I would love to.

821
00:53:12.940 --> 00:53:13.180
Okay.

822
00:53:13.700 --> 00:53:13.960
All right.

823
00:53:14.100 --> 00:53:14.520
I would love to.

824
00:53:14.900 --> 00:53:17.760
Girl, give me this week to work my magic.

825
00:53:19.200 --> 00:53:21.520
And we're gonna figure something out for you.

826
00:53:22.240 --> 00:53:22.720
Okay?

827
00:53:23.940 --> 00:53:24.900
Sound good?

828
00:53:25.320 --> 00:53:28.060
So this is beyond the words.

829
00:53:28.460 --> 00:53:28.820
Yes.

830
00:53:29.540 --> 00:53:31.720
I did not go to Suncoast Church,

831
00:53:32.020 --> 00:53:34.380
but obviously my son went to school there.

832
00:53:34.460 --> 00:53:36.360
And so I probably have some connections there.

833
00:53:38.660 --> 00:53:40.740
And then, do you know Church of Hope?

834
00:53:42.480 --> 00:53:42.960
Yes.

835
00:53:43.580 --> 00:53:45.480
That was my church for over 10 years.

836
00:53:45.520 --> 00:53:47.680
And I'm telling you, there is a lot of people there.

837
00:53:48.420 --> 00:53:51.200
They will pour into you.

838
00:53:52.460 --> 00:53:54.080
Like, yes, absolutely.

839
00:53:54.920 --> 00:53:57.620
Like some of my, I mean, I have so many good friends

840
00:54:00.080 --> 00:54:02.720
that they loved my kid like their own.

841
00:54:03.940 --> 00:54:06.900
Like it was a joy, honestly.

842
00:54:07.040 --> 00:54:10.160
Like he has so many friends still back home in Sarasota

843
00:54:10.740 --> 00:54:12.660
that when I still go visit,

844
00:54:12.840 --> 00:54:15.880
like they're like, come see me, come see me.

845
00:54:17.040 --> 00:54:19.700
And my son's like, I wanna go visit my friend Ashton.

846
00:54:19.760 --> 00:54:21.120
I wanna go visit my friend Jack.

847
00:54:21.160 --> 00:54:23.240
And I wanna go visit my friend Paxton.

848
00:54:24.480 --> 00:54:27.540
Like, we're gonna, this is an answer prayer for you.

849
00:54:29.360 --> 00:54:30.940
Cause that's what you need.

850
00:54:31.000 --> 00:54:33.000
If there's any other single mamas on there,

851
00:54:33.380 --> 00:54:36.120
start praying for God to start bringing you community

852
00:54:36.340 --> 00:54:39.260
that's gonna come alongside you and help you parent

853
00:54:39.620 --> 00:54:41.200
and be there for you.

854
00:54:41.280 --> 00:54:43.740
Because you can't do this all by yourself.

855
00:54:43.780 --> 00:54:45.140
You're not supposed to.

856
00:54:47.640 --> 00:54:49.280
God, I'm a firm believer

857
00:54:49.280 --> 00:54:52.160
and it takes a village to raise your kids.

858
00:54:52.640 --> 00:54:54.500
I'm married and it still takes a village

859
00:54:54.600 --> 00:54:56.920
for me and my husband to raise our three kids.

860
00:54:57.840 --> 00:54:59.980
Y'all, like I need my.

861
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:02.420
church community, I need my kids' school community.

862
00:55:03.000 --> 00:55:04.380
I can't do it alone.

863
00:55:04.820 --> 00:55:07.020
I can't be my everything for my kids.

864
00:55:07.080 --> 00:55:09.220
If I was my everything for my kids,

865
00:55:09.320 --> 00:55:11.100
they wouldn't need a savior, y'all.

866
00:55:12.100 --> 00:55:14.900
They need to know that there's other people out there

867
00:55:15.920 --> 00:55:17.840
to help bear those burdens.

868
00:55:18.560 --> 00:55:20.820
That's what community is all about.

869
00:55:22.060 --> 00:55:25.740
And so we're gonna, you gotta start praying for community.

870
00:55:26.660 --> 00:55:28.360
All right, and we're gonna,

871
00:55:28.360 --> 00:55:30.320
we're gonna find your community here.

872
00:55:30.520 --> 00:55:31.720
That would be great for you.

873
00:55:32.540 --> 00:55:35.200
Yes, and so that, you know,

874
00:55:35.200 --> 00:55:37.820
when you're meeting men and they wanna, you know,

875
00:55:37.860 --> 00:55:38.940
take you out on a date,

876
00:55:39.380 --> 00:55:41.280
you can call up some people and say,

877
00:55:41.880 --> 00:55:44.260
hey, I got an offer to have a date.

878
00:55:44.500 --> 00:55:46.620
Are there any nights this week that you're available

879
00:55:46.920 --> 00:55:48.340
that you can help me out?

880
00:55:49.120 --> 00:55:50.980
And we're gonna figure this out.

881
00:55:50.980 --> 00:55:53.020
I know Church of Hope for a while,

882
00:55:53.440 --> 00:55:55.020
and I don't know if they still do this,

883
00:55:55.040 --> 00:55:56.320
and I can probably reach out

884
00:55:56.320 --> 00:55:59.280
because I'm friends with the pastors and everything there.

885
00:56:00.720 --> 00:56:02.280
They did Parents Night Out.

886
00:56:03.500 --> 00:56:04.640
And so they would host,

887
00:56:04.920 --> 00:56:08.840
the youth there would host a Parents Night Out.

888
00:56:08.920 --> 00:56:10.540
So you would just drop your kids off.

889
00:56:11.500 --> 00:56:13.560
And it was like $10 per kid.

890
00:56:15.260 --> 00:56:17.620
And they hung out and played games.

891
00:56:17.640 --> 00:56:20.500
And they had this like huge arcade in their church

892
00:56:21.280 --> 00:56:23.220
and like all these fun games.

893
00:56:23.380 --> 00:56:25.900
And they fed them pizza and all that stuff.

894
00:56:25.900 --> 00:56:29.140
And then parents got to go like out for a couple hours.

895
00:56:30.140 --> 00:56:33.940
So I know there's resources available in Sarasota for you.

896
00:56:34.180 --> 00:56:36.500
And so we're just, like I said,

897
00:56:36.840 --> 00:56:40.080
give me a week to figure some things out

898
00:56:40.080 --> 00:56:42.100
and we're gonna get you connected to some people

899
00:56:42.100 --> 00:56:45.740
so you can have some time to start dating.

900
00:56:47.580 --> 00:56:47.580


901
00:56:47.820 --> 00:56:50.000
My oldest kid is in high school,

902
00:56:50.140 --> 00:56:53.140
so I don't really need the babysitter anymore,

903
00:56:53.140 --> 00:56:56.760
but between my two jobs and three kids

904
00:56:56.960 --> 00:56:59.340
and their schools right now,

905
00:57:00.120 --> 00:57:02.620
it's that what makes it a little bit challenging.

906
00:57:03.180 --> 00:57:03.500
Okay.

907
00:57:03.840 --> 00:57:08.220
So you can leave them at home with your high schooler?

908
00:57:08.740 --> 00:57:10.360
Yes, that's what I have to do

909
00:57:10.360 --> 00:57:12.780
since I had no options I guess.

910
00:57:13.560 --> 00:57:13.760
Gotcha.

911
00:57:13.900 --> 00:57:15.660
Well, we still wanna get you community

912
00:57:15.660 --> 00:57:18.180
and we wanna get you surrounded by other families.

913
00:57:18.800 --> 00:57:19.720
That's important.

914
00:57:19.800 --> 00:57:20.140
Yes.

915
00:57:20.140 --> 00:57:22.560
Like ladies, if you have kids

916
00:57:22.560 --> 00:57:25.020
or you marry in to somebody that has kids,

917
00:57:25.760 --> 00:57:26.800
y'all need community.

918
00:57:28.060 --> 00:57:30.000
Like-minded community is so important.

919
00:57:31.080 --> 00:57:33.420
My husband and I, we ended up,

920
00:57:34.500 --> 00:57:37.260
he went to a mega church here and I never,

921
00:57:37.880 --> 00:57:41.040
like I was like, ah, like it was good.

922
00:57:41.060 --> 00:57:42.780
I mean, I always felt Holy Spirit there,

923
00:57:43.260 --> 00:57:46.780
but the community, it was hard to get plugged in.

924
00:57:47.660 --> 00:57:51.280
And then God just spoke to us

925
00:57:51.280 --> 00:57:54.120
that we were gonna like go to a new church.

926
00:57:54.400 --> 00:57:56.100
It has been a complete blessing.

927
00:57:56.360 --> 00:57:57.600
It is a small church plant.

928
00:57:57.800 --> 00:58:00.080
There's like maybe over 200 people at this church,

929
00:58:00.800 --> 00:58:05.080
but I've needed to lean on him so much this year

930
00:58:05.540 --> 00:58:07.500
and especially for my kids.

931
00:58:08.160 --> 00:58:09.860
Like it's so important,

932
00:58:09.960 --> 00:58:13.140
whether you're single, married, whatever,

933
00:58:13.720 --> 00:58:14.780
community is important.

934
00:58:15.540 --> 00:58:18.260
And so I want you ladies to get plugged in there,

935
00:58:18.500 --> 00:58:20.060
get plugged in here.

936
00:58:20.720 --> 00:58:23.240
I mean, look, like I had no idea

937
00:58:23.240 --> 00:58:25.240
that she lived in Sarasota, y'all.

938
00:58:25.240 --> 00:58:30.000
And I saw her post and I was like, hey, I can relate.

939
00:58:30.120 --> 00:58:31.720
I was a single mom too.

940
00:58:32.940 --> 00:58:34.840
And I'm gonna give you some pointers.

941
00:58:34.940 --> 00:58:36.700
I'm gonna help you navigate this dating

942
00:58:36.700 --> 00:58:38.320
because I remember what it's like.

943
00:58:39.100 --> 00:58:40.900
And y'all, she comes on

944
00:58:40.960 --> 00:58:44.600
and she is from the same town that I was in.

945
00:58:45.380 --> 00:58:48.680
Now, if that's not God, I don't know what is.

946
00:58:50.220 --> 00:58:55.240
Ladies, let that be a God wink to every single one of you.

947
00:58:56.560 --> 00:58:59.600
God cares about your love story.

948
00:59:00.760 --> 00:59:04.800
This community, like you're here for a purpose.

949
00:59:05.860 --> 00:59:08.980
This is a divine appointment that you are here.

950
00:59:09.480 --> 00:59:12.780
I cannot tell you how many blessings

951
00:59:12.780 --> 00:59:14.100
has come from this community.

952
00:59:14.100 --> 00:59:17.760
And the husband is not like even the top one all the time.

953
00:59:18.820 --> 00:59:20.820
I love my husband, okay?

954
00:59:21.060 --> 00:59:22.460
Don't get me wrong.

955
00:59:22.580 --> 00:59:24.640
Like he is a top bonus here,

956
00:59:24.640 --> 00:59:27.220
but I'm telling you there's so much more.

957
00:59:27.960 --> 00:59:31.700
Just lean into this community, show up, come in the app,

958
00:59:31.920 --> 00:59:32.920
share your vulnerability.

959
00:59:34.460 --> 00:59:35.800
You know, she was vulnerable.

960
00:59:35.940 --> 00:59:37.220
She's like, hey, I'm single mom.

961
00:59:37.220 --> 00:59:38.440
And like, this is hard.

962
00:59:38.480 --> 00:59:39.800
I don't know how to find time.

963
00:59:39.840 --> 00:59:41.580
And I'm like, girl, I got you.

964
00:59:42.380 --> 00:59:45.440
I didn't know I had her as much as I actually do.

965
00:59:46.900 --> 00:59:50.120
Like, but God knew, God brought her here.

966
00:59:51.360 --> 00:59:51.520
Y'all.

967
00:59:53.320 --> 00:59:53.340
So.

968
00:59:54.880 --> 00:59:54.880


969
00:59:55.140 --> 00:59:58.820
Oh, I'm like, I'm filled to the brim right now.

970
00:59:58.820 --> 00:59:59.980
I've got chills.

971
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:09.680
all up and down like so like I said we'll figure some things out continue to keep me posted in the

972
01:00:09.680 --> 01:00:13.920
app and like I said let me work some magic this week let me reach out to some people let me see

973
01:00:13.920 --> 01:00:19.140
what we I who I can introduce you to connect you with so that you can just even just go out and

974
01:00:19.140 --> 01:00:24.440
just get to know people believe it or not ladies sometimes your spirit mates are going to come from

975
01:00:24.440 --> 01:00:33.920
that you know right Mary the six degrees of separation right God showed that to you right

976
01:00:34.420 --> 01:00:39.560
you never know who you're gonna meet that's connected to your spirit mate

977
01:00:41.420 --> 01:00:49.120
God just wants you to go out and live the life that he gave you enjoy this day right

978
01:00:51.240 --> 01:00:58.860
oh all right we've got like 10-15 minutes um Meg from Chicago I know I didn't get to you last week

979
01:00:58.860 --> 01:01:05.300
so I'm jumping to you and then Kim and Helen if I can get to you I will if not post in the app

980
01:01:05.640 --> 01:01:12.460
Meg are you available sorry I am I'm here I cannot hear this smoke detector

981
01:01:14.100 --> 01:01:16.120
y'all she sure you cannot hear it

982
01:01:18.840 --> 01:01:25.700
oh my goodness okay we only hear it when you talk so yeah like if you're in the middle of

983
01:01:25.700 --> 01:01:32.580
talking I can hear it like go okay ladies I'm sorry and you know like my ceilings are high I'm

984
01:01:32.580 --> 01:01:39.620
like and I'm short there's no way of me reaching and my husband's at work and my six-foot son I

985
01:01:39.620 --> 01:01:43.680
pick him up and we don't get home till five so I've got to listen to this thing for four hours

986
01:01:43.680 --> 01:01:51.060
whoo but I'm not gonna let it distract me all right um so Meg welcome welcome welcome Helen

987
01:01:51.060 --> 01:01:59.480
pickleball okay awesome um all right sorry look I'm not letting the alarm distract me but I'm

988
01:01:59.480 --> 01:02:06.820
letting everything else okay all right Meg what do you got for us okay you guys ready yes okay

989
01:02:06.820 --> 01:02:12.020
well I first wanted to you know I'm brand new as of last week and I wanted to really like make myself

990
01:02:12.020 --> 01:02:17.380
known before I write a post and everything so that you guys know who I am and also for

991
01:02:17.380 --> 01:02:22.000
accountability in my specific situation because it's a little bit different and I don't want to

992
01:02:22.000 --> 01:02:27.960
go this road alone so you're not alone that's the good news we're here for you I could shake like I

993
01:02:27.960 --> 01:02:36.760
get so nervous about my situation okay so I have um a friend from 25 years ago um that I have

994
01:02:36.760 --> 01:02:43.980
reconnected with about six months ago so before I ever started a program and um we weren't super

995
01:02:43.980 --> 01:02:49.580
great friends back then he was engaged to be I met him through uh the woman he ended up marrying

996
01:02:49.580 --> 01:02:56.160
who was a loose friend of mine and our spirits immediately just sucked onto each other and we're

997
01:02:56.160 --> 01:03:01.500
like oh I like you so much and he just he was somebody I was immediately at home with and safe

998
01:03:01.500 --> 01:03:08.080
and same vice versa for him I didn't live in the area but every time I came home to visit

999
01:03:08.500 --> 01:03:12.760
I guess he would scour the church for me trying to find out where I am and just

1000
01:03:12.760 --> 01:03:18.740
it was always wonderful the connections we had or when we kind of hung out never alone of course

1001
01:03:18.740 --> 01:03:25.820
there was never any thought to anything um you know and I had a lot of belief in him from ground

1002
01:03:25.820 --> 01:03:30.760
zero right he was just in some ways I'm like even if he never married me he was my person

1003
01:03:30.760 --> 01:03:36.160
and I just had so much belief in him and what God was going to do in his life so anyway so

1004
01:03:36.160 --> 01:03:42.500
that's background right so then life goes on and I move away and we're on Facebook but really don't

1005
01:03:42.500 --> 01:03:47.220
connect for almost 25 years because and he's married right at this time he's married he's

1006
01:03:47.220 --> 01:03:53.880
got kids and every time um which wasn't often I would go on his site I would just smile and just

1007
01:03:53.880 --> 01:03:59.660
be like Lord thank you I can see how you are doing the things that I knew you're going to do in his

1008
01:03:59.660 --> 01:04:07.080
life you know he's doing it God he's I'm just so happy for him right and so then a few years ago

1009
01:04:07.080 --> 01:04:12.340
he messaged me out of the blue I didn't write back because I thought oh it's just him being

1010
01:04:12.340 --> 01:04:17.380
so sweet we were both unbeknownst to me going through some really difficult life changes at

1011
01:04:17.380 --> 01:04:22.920
the same time which is why I didn't message back okay then about three years later God's like you

1012
01:04:23.560 --> 01:04:30.180
so hold on I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm just trying to this timeline when he reached out to you a few

1013
01:04:30.180 --> 01:04:36.960
years ago was he already divorced he was in the middle of being divorced yes okay but you did not

1014
01:04:36.960 --> 01:04:43.560
you didn't pick it up you were just you didn't respond back oh I hadn't and I had no idea they

1015
01:04:43.560 --> 01:04:50.140
were being divorced okay okay gotcha okay continue I I knew none of it and we were both I was going

1016
01:04:50.140 --> 01:04:58.960
through a medical retirement 20 years early due to a disability okay and I just had no no idea so

1017
01:04:58.960 --> 01:04:59.980
then about

1018
01:05:00.580 --> 01:05:02.120
Two and a half years later, God said,

1019
01:05:02.220 --> 01:05:04.080
you know, you haven't written him back yet.

1020
01:05:04.420 --> 01:05:06.700
I said, Lord, it's been two and a half years.

1021
01:05:06.780 --> 01:05:09.460
I mean, I look like a sucky friend at this point.

1022
01:05:09.820 --> 01:05:11.440
And so he's like, well, why don't you just go like

1023
01:05:11.440 --> 01:05:11.840
at a site?

1024
01:05:11.880 --> 01:05:14.500
And that's when I realized the man is available.

1025
01:05:14.800 --> 01:05:18.960
This man, you know, this, he's the bomb, you know,

1026
01:05:18.960 --> 01:05:20.420
in the spirit, he's the bomb, right?

1027
01:05:20.680 --> 01:05:23.860
And I'm like, oh no, I have totally messed up, God.

1028
01:05:24.080 --> 01:05:25.280
I said, I can't write him now.

1029
01:05:25.320 --> 01:05:26.320
It's been two and a half years.

1030
01:05:26.380 --> 01:05:28.500
And then all of a sudden he messages again.

1031
01:05:28.500 --> 01:05:30.460
God's like, okay, perfect excuse.

1032
01:05:31.200 --> 01:05:33.700
So it's like, okay, God's like, here you message.

1033
01:05:33.860 --> 01:05:34.400
No, no, no.

1034
01:05:34.400 --> 01:05:36.060
Okay, now this guy's gonna message.

1035
01:05:36.420 --> 01:05:38.960
No, and it took me even almost a month

1036
01:05:38.960 --> 01:05:40.860
after that to message him.

1037
01:05:41.020 --> 01:05:41.280
Okay.

1038
01:05:41.280 --> 01:05:44.300
And I wasn't expecting anything, you know,

1039
01:05:44.380 --> 01:05:46.260
just reaching out, say I care about you.

1040
01:05:46.780 --> 01:05:49.060
Thank you so much for your messages to me.

1041
01:05:49.060 --> 01:05:50.100
Really touched my heart.

1042
01:05:50.540 --> 01:05:51.940
And he's like, here's my number.

1043
01:05:54.340 --> 01:05:58.480
So, but we reconnected like as friends.

1044
01:05:58.500 --> 01:06:00.620
So we were never flirty.

1045
01:06:00.980 --> 01:06:03.360
So it's been six months now we've been talking

1046
01:06:04.180 --> 01:06:08.020
and we never, it didn't start off as flirty at all.

1047
01:06:08.100 --> 01:06:10.780
Just talking, we can talk about deep things,

1048
01:06:11.020 --> 01:06:12.320
stuff going on in our lives.

1049
01:06:12.600 --> 01:06:14.700
We can laugh, we can, you know what I mean?

1050
01:06:14.760 --> 01:06:16.440
We're at home with one another.

1051
01:06:17.460 --> 01:06:17.940
Yeah.

1052
01:06:19.540 --> 01:06:21.060
So during that six months,

1053
01:06:21.140 --> 01:06:23.960
God's had me kind of on speed dial in a lot of ways.

1054
01:06:23.960 --> 01:06:27.920
I've relocated back home after being gone for 20 years.

1055
01:06:29.000 --> 01:06:29.800
My career is gone.

1056
01:06:30.080 --> 01:06:30.760
My home has gone.

1057
01:06:31.080 --> 01:06:31.580
Everything's gone.

1058
01:06:31.680 --> 01:06:35.040
I've lost 40 pounds that I couldn't lose in over a decade.

1059
01:06:35.380 --> 01:06:38.360
Like everything is totally, I'm on warp speed.

1060
01:06:38.760 --> 01:06:40.660
And I'm here stuck in Chicago,

1061
01:06:40.780 --> 01:06:42.360
which I know is sacred, not stuck,

1062
01:06:42.820 --> 01:06:44.800
living with my mother right now temporarily.

1063
01:06:45.640 --> 01:06:47.340
And what I need to be doing,

1064
01:06:47.600 --> 01:06:49.180
and I'm starting to move next,

1065
01:06:49.700 --> 01:06:53.400
move on at next month is go down to where he is,

1066
01:06:53.400 --> 01:06:56.180
which is actually where I went to school for 13 years,

1067
01:06:56.380 --> 01:06:59.300
which is where I feel most at home.

1068
01:06:59.360 --> 01:07:01.400
If I'm gonna settle, I got friends down there.

1069
01:07:01.440 --> 01:07:03.000
Don't have really a community

1070
01:07:03.000 --> 01:07:04.660
or friends up here by my mother.

1071
01:07:05.760 --> 01:07:05.760


1072
01:07:06.360 --> 01:07:08.680
So, so I came home,

1073
01:07:08.740 --> 01:07:12.420
but he hasn't said anything like, let's get together.

1074
01:07:12.460 --> 01:07:15.740
He keeps asking me things like, when are you moving?

1075
01:07:16.280 --> 01:07:17.160
Where are you now?

1076
01:07:17.680 --> 01:07:18.940
So how's it going?

1077
01:07:19.200 --> 01:07:20.900
And so I finally said, I'm coming down.

1078
01:07:21.400 --> 01:07:22.580
I would love to see you.

1079
01:07:23.220 --> 01:07:24.220
Is that going to work?

1080
01:07:24.480 --> 01:07:25.840
And he said, I'd love it too.

1081
01:07:25.980 --> 01:07:26.780
Yes, it will work.

1082
01:07:27.800 --> 01:07:28.360
Yes.

1083
01:07:28.780 --> 01:07:29.120
Okay.

1084
01:07:29.360 --> 01:07:30.120
When's that gonna happen?

1085
01:07:31.560 --> 01:07:34.200
September 3rd through 8th is when I'm going, okay?

1086
01:07:34.280 --> 01:07:37.460
But he's also incredibly, incredibly busy for work.

1087
01:07:38.100 --> 01:07:41.580
And so I get very scared if there's red flags,

1088
01:07:41.660 --> 01:07:42.400
I don't notice.

1089
01:07:42.820 --> 01:07:46.460
Like our connection is not predictable and regular.

1090
01:07:46.880 --> 01:07:50.100
We may talk for 10 hours one day

1091
01:07:50.100 --> 01:07:51.880
and then not talk for two weeks.

1092
01:07:52.560 --> 01:07:56.300
Or we may talk just a little snippet.

1093
01:07:56.420 --> 01:07:58.820
And then a few days later, he may send me something funny

1094
01:07:58.820 --> 01:08:00.200
or you know what I mean?

1095
01:08:00.880 --> 01:08:03.700
And as I've kind of put together this pattern,

1096
01:08:03.800 --> 01:08:05.440
cause it is a pattern, a weird one.

1097
01:08:05.560 --> 01:08:09.320
I think a lot of times, like this past month,

1098
01:08:09.320 --> 01:08:12.420
he's been negotiating a $300 million deal.

1099
01:08:12.600 --> 01:08:15.160
And I'm like, what kind of guy does that?

1100
01:08:15.500 --> 01:08:18.960
But it's like totally stressing him out

1101
01:08:18.960 --> 01:08:21.020
and taking away a lot of peace, right?

1102
01:08:21.020 --> 01:08:23.180
He's got a lot on his plate.

1103
01:08:23.819 --> 01:08:24.979
And he's got a lot of responsibility.

1104
01:08:25.660 --> 01:08:27.420
But there's so much we have in common

1105
01:08:27.420 --> 01:08:30.380
about the fields we ended up in, our future vision.

1106
01:08:31.100 --> 01:08:33.779
He established that in our first conversation ever.

1107
01:08:33.859 --> 01:08:36.120
And he's like, wow, sounds like we've got a,

1108
01:08:36.380 --> 01:08:37.300
we're going in the same direction.

1109
01:08:37.420 --> 01:08:38.180
What do you think of that?

1110
01:08:38.279 --> 01:08:40.240
And I'm like, uh.

1111
01:08:41.520 --> 01:08:43.040
You're like, I think it's pretty good.

1112
01:08:43.840 --> 01:08:45.920
But I have no, I have no idea

1113
01:08:47.420 --> 01:08:49.899
because I'm a very literal person

1114
01:08:49.899 --> 01:08:51.380
and I have no idea what to make

1115
01:08:51.380 --> 01:08:52.740
of some things that are said.

1116
01:08:52.859 --> 01:08:54.899
And if there's red flags, if there's not red flags,

1117
01:08:55.100 --> 01:08:57.340
like we're at a point where he can go weeks

1118
01:08:57.479 --> 01:08:58.960
without talking to me.

1119
01:08:59.479 --> 01:08:59.960
Okay.

1120
01:09:00.319 --> 01:09:03.240
And like last week I reached out and I'll just say,

1121
01:09:03.520 --> 01:09:05.120
hey, how are you doing?

1122
01:09:05.120 --> 01:09:07.200
Because the one thing the Lord showed me

1123
01:09:07.200 --> 01:09:09.740
is be his friend, be a friend.

1124
01:09:10.520 --> 01:09:13.100
Are you, will he, like,

1125
01:09:13.300 --> 01:09:16.279
so he'll sometimes reach out to you as it reciprocated.

1126
01:09:16.420 --> 01:09:18.899
So it's not always you reaching out to him.

1127
01:09:18.899 --> 01:09:21.200
There's sometimes it's you, sometimes it's him.

1128
01:09:22.100 --> 01:09:25.840
Yes, but recently, but recently in the last month

1129
01:09:25.840 --> 01:09:27.800
it's been me reaching out first.

1130
01:09:28.100 --> 01:09:28.580
Okay.

1131
01:09:29.399 --> 01:09:31.540
And so that's scary to me.

1132
01:09:31.540 --> 01:09:32.859
Like, is this a red flag?

1133
01:09:33.000 --> 01:09:33.859
The last.

1134
01:09:34.060 --> 01:09:34.939
Those are not red flags.

1135
01:09:35.080 --> 01:09:36.399
No, these are not red flags.

1136
01:09:36.540 --> 01:09:39.200
These are just, maybe they're like greenish yellow.

1137
01:09:40.140 --> 01:09:40.680
All right.

1138
01:09:41.240 --> 01:09:44.740
What we need to get you to is you're going to see him

1139
01:09:44.740 --> 01:09:47.220
on September 3rd and then more is going to be revealed

1140
01:09:47.979 --> 01:09:49.660
once you spend some time with him.

1141
01:09:50.160 --> 01:09:50.220
Yes.

1142
01:09:50.500 --> 01:09:52.300
So that's actually kind of where I'm going with this.

1143
01:09:52.540 --> 01:09:52.899
So a couple of things.

1144
01:09:53.020 --> 01:09:54.700
So the last conversation we really had,

1145
01:09:55.200 --> 01:09:58.380
we ended up like flirting and I didn't.

1146
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:02.720
And it was a joke, right?

1147
01:10:02.720 --> 01:10:03.820
So he said, how's it going?

1148
01:10:04.020 --> 01:10:04.680
Living it up?

1149
01:10:05.040 --> 01:10:06.300
Because it's a very sleepy time.

1150
01:10:06.340 --> 01:10:08.860
I said, oh, yeah, you know, I'm clubbing nightly.

1151
01:10:08.860 --> 01:10:10.180
It was just a joke.

1152
01:10:10.260 --> 01:10:12.120
I know nothing about clubbing, right?

1153
01:10:12.120 --> 01:10:13.540
And he's like, oh, in your mini skirt?

1154
01:10:13.780 --> 01:10:14.640
That's hot.

1155
01:10:15.080 --> 01:10:17.580
And so we just kind of devolved from there.

1156
01:10:17.580 --> 01:10:18.660
There's a little flirt going on.

1157
01:10:18.840 --> 01:10:19.420
Yep, yep.

1158
01:10:19.420 --> 01:10:20.580
It devolved from there.

1159
01:10:20.620 --> 01:10:23.880
And he's like, by the way, I'm a great dancer in this fantasy.

1160
01:10:24.040 --> 01:10:25.180
I'm like, fantasy?

1161
01:10:26.240 --> 01:10:29.120
So there were a couple of things that were said.

1162
01:10:29.120 --> 01:10:30.800
And he's like, so what else?

1163
01:10:30.880 --> 01:10:30.880


1164
01:10:31.020 --> 01:10:32.680
Yep, that's a little yellow.

1165
01:10:32.780 --> 01:10:36.160
But again, you guys have a different connection.

1166
01:10:36.200 --> 01:10:38.080
We have a different connection, right?

1167
01:10:38.080 --> 01:10:41.660
If a guy is saying that to you and you don't really know him,

1168
01:10:41.900 --> 01:10:42.740
that's a red flag.

1169
01:10:42.820 --> 01:10:43.660
Right, different, right?

1170
01:10:44.100 --> 01:10:47.480
Then there's a little bit more comfortability, OK?

1171
01:10:47.540 --> 01:10:48.060
Yes.

1172
01:10:48.080 --> 01:10:50.720
You have to remember, he's been married before.

1173
01:10:50.740 --> 01:10:51.200
Yes.

1174
01:10:51.860 --> 01:10:55.380
And I know that he wants a wife.

1175
01:10:55.420 --> 01:10:56.580
I know that, right?

1176
01:10:56.580 --> 01:11:00.120
And he kind of, he's like, so what else is going on in this club?

1177
01:11:00.160 --> 01:11:00.980
I said, well, I don't know.

1178
01:11:01.040 --> 01:11:02.160
Why don't you tell me?

1179
01:11:02.340 --> 01:11:03.600
I thought he was going to say dinner.

1180
01:11:04.560 --> 01:11:05.240
Oh, no.

1181
01:11:05.240 --> 01:11:08.820
He's like, well, there's a lot of touching happening in this club.

1182
01:11:09.440 --> 01:11:12.360
And so I just said, I thought, OK, God, what am I going to say?

1183
01:11:12.360 --> 01:11:13.400
Because I don't want to act like a prude.

1184
01:11:13.520 --> 01:11:16.060
I said, oh, this club is getting steamy.

1185
01:11:17.120 --> 01:11:19.500
So I said, maybe we better find some dinner.

1186
01:11:20.440 --> 01:11:22.280
Good, so you redirected it.

1187
01:11:22.460 --> 01:11:23.700
I shut it down.

1188
01:11:23.700 --> 01:11:25.640
And then I said, just so you know,

1189
01:11:25.920 --> 01:11:28.820
I have zero experience in clubs and what goes on in clubs.

1190
01:11:29.700 --> 01:11:29.960
Yes.

1191
01:11:30.220 --> 01:11:33.040
And so then he's like, I'm not really a club person either.

1192
01:11:33.140 --> 01:11:34.920
I would only ever go if we were going

1193
01:11:34.920 --> 01:11:38.740
to sit there and talk smack about the people we're watching, right?

1194
01:11:38.900 --> 01:11:40.320
But it makes me worried.

1195
01:11:40.480 --> 01:11:41.700
Like, did I show up?

1196
01:11:41.800 --> 01:11:42.820
Did I look like a skank?

1197
01:11:43.180 --> 01:11:46.020
Did I look like, now he doesn't want to talk to me anymore.

1198
01:11:47.020 --> 01:11:48.620
I mean, if he doesn't, OK.

1199
01:11:48.620 --> 01:11:50.580
I think it's just flirting again.

1200
01:11:50.640 --> 01:11:52.820
And remember, he's been married.

1201
01:11:52.820 --> 01:11:55.100
So his level of flirting is going to be

1202
01:11:55.100 --> 01:11:56.880
that probably of a married man.

1203
01:11:56.880 --> 01:11:58.420
And I don't mind that, right?

1204
01:11:59.020 --> 01:12:00.860
As long as you're putting those boundaries up

1205
01:12:00.860 --> 01:12:02.340
and he's respecting those boundaries.

1206
01:12:02.920 --> 01:12:04.460
So that would be my thing.

1207
01:12:05.380 --> 01:12:09.840
Let's look forward to getting to see him, all right?

1208
01:12:09.840 --> 01:12:12.740
Because you're going to be down where you have other friends.

1209
01:12:12.920 --> 01:12:16.220
So you're not spending all your time with him.

1210
01:12:17.240 --> 01:12:19.500
Playing a date, all right?

1211
01:12:19.500 --> 01:12:22.400
Not alone, in public, OK?

1212
01:12:22.400 --> 01:12:23.640
Oh, yeah, no, don't worry.

1213
01:12:24.940 --> 01:12:28.040
I already know we might have a problem with hands.

1214
01:12:28.440 --> 01:12:31.720
So yeah, let's keep our boundaries healthy.

1215
01:12:32.060 --> 01:12:35.020
Let's keep them, you know, stay in public.

1216
01:12:35.500 --> 01:12:36.860
Like, know your limits.

1217
01:12:37.040 --> 01:12:40.300
Ladies, it's always important to know what, like,

1218
01:12:40.300 --> 01:12:44.160
at what boundary do you have that you are like, OK,

1219
01:12:44.160 --> 01:12:45.860
I can't cross this boundary.

1220
01:12:45.860 --> 01:12:48.500
Because if I cross it, then it's, you know,

1221
01:12:48.760 --> 01:12:50.720
it's all free for all, right?

1222
01:12:50.900 --> 01:12:51.300
OK?

1223
01:12:51.300 --> 01:12:53.220
And thankfully, I know that for me.

1224
01:12:53.620 --> 01:12:55.180
You know, not my pre-Jesus stage,

1225
01:12:55.360 --> 01:12:57.980
but my totally screwed up stage.

1226
01:12:58.060 --> 01:12:59.460
I know what that is.

1227
01:12:59.700 --> 01:13:00.600
So thank God for that.

1228
01:13:01.280 --> 01:13:02.880
Yeah, let's keep that.

1229
01:13:03.400 --> 01:13:04.180
But I get nervous.

1230
01:13:05.240 --> 01:13:05.240


1231
01:13:05.400 --> 01:13:06.700
It's OK to be nervous.

1232
01:13:07.200 --> 01:13:09.020
But I get nervous about, like, OK,

1233
01:13:09.020 --> 01:13:11.060
because I deal a lot with insecurity.

1234
01:13:11.580 --> 01:13:13.360
And so here I am, 48.

1235
01:13:13.480 --> 01:13:15.180
I have no, I mean, I've given it all up.

1236
01:13:15.220 --> 01:13:16.700
I've totally done the Ruth thing,

1237
01:13:16.700 --> 01:13:18.780
where it's like, you have left everything behind

1238
01:13:18.800 --> 01:13:20.180
to follow what God has for you.

1239
01:13:20.180 --> 01:13:21.400
And you have no idea what it is.

1240
01:13:22.340 --> 01:13:25.240
But like, what if I go to this date,

1241
01:13:25.920 --> 01:13:28.780
or just get together because we're friends,

1242
01:13:29.020 --> 01:13:31.880
even though we flirt and talk about everything under the sun

1243
01:13:33.080 --> 01:13:34.220
when we do talk.

1244
01:13:34.280 --> 01:13:37.240
But then when we don't talk, it could be weeks and whatever.

1245
01:13:37.320 --> 01:13:39.440
But he's always very attentive when we do talk.

1246
01:13:40.360 --> 01:13:40.720
But then.

1247
01:13:40.980 --> 01:13:42.860
That's not, let's just, I'm going

1248
01:13:42.860 --> 01:13:44.360
to tell you what Jackie used to tell me.

1249
01:13:44.380 --> 01:13:45.120
What if he says nothing?

1250
01:13:45.200 --> 01:13:46.900
What if he says nothing?

1251
01:13:47.000 --> 01:13:49.220
What if he says nothing about seeing me again?

1252
01:13:49.220 --> 01:13:51.260
Do I just put it out there?

1253
01:13:51.820 --> 01:13:53.880
Hey, I don't want to be your pen pal.

1254
01:13:54.120 --> 01:13:56.560
I've loved you forever as a friend.

1255
01:13:56.560 --> 01:13:57.280
But you know what?

1256
01:13:57.360 --> 01:13:59.380
I think that there could be more here than this.

1257
01:13:59.400 --> 01:14:02.460
So I'm just making sure you know that I'm interested.

1258
01:14:02.960 --> 01:14:06.060
So you're wanting to drop that hanky, right?

1259
01:14:06.680 --> 01:14:09.060
I don't know what I'm supposed to do.

1260
01:14:09.300 --> 01:14:10.360
I don't want to lose.

1261
01:14:10.700 --> 01:14:12.440
This is what I'm going to tell you,

1262
01:14:12.460 --> 01:14:13.520
what Jackie used to tell me.

1263
01:14:13.520 --> 01:14:15.380
Just go out and have fun, OK?

1264
01:14:15.380 --> 01:14:17.180
Let's not think about the what ifs.

1265
01:14:17.180 --> 01:14:19.120
My husband always tells me that.

1266
01:14:19.500 --> 01:14:21.060
Because I'll play the what if game.

1267
01:14:21.080 --> 01:14:22.620
And he's like, we're not playing the what if game.

1268
01:14:23.760 --> 01:14:26.520
So when you want to go down that path, just be like, OK.

1269
01:14:27.020 --> 01:14:28.920
Carla's husband always says, don't play the what if game.

1270
01:14:30.140 --> 01:14:30.860
Don't play the what if game.

1271
01:14:31.320 --> 01:14:32.960
I guess I get so.

1272
01:14:34.020 --> 01:14:36.700
OK, I'm trying to change my what ifs to even ifs.

1273
01:14:37.500 --> 01:14:41.020
So I go down there for five days to try to figure things out.

1274
01:14:41.040 --> 01:14:44.620
And then I come back here, where I'm relatively inaccessible.

1275
01:14:44.620 --> 01:14:48.240
And then I have to make, I don't want to rent an apartment.

1276
01:14:48.580 --> 01:14:49.700
I don't want to buy a home.

1277
01:14:49.780 --> 01:14:51.320
I just, I told God, I want to be safe.

1278
01:14:51.320 --> 01:14:53.560
Let's not put the cart before the horse, OK?

1279
01:14:53.820 --> 01:14:55.260
OK, what's the horse?

1280
01:14:55.380 --> 01:14:56.740
Tell me what the horse is.

1281
01:14:57.040 --> 01:14:59.980
This is, OK, this is looking like a.

1282
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:05.520
just attachment okay you're getting ahead of yourself okay and i think you realize that all

1283
01:15:05.520 --> 01:15:11.920
right yeah let's just let's ground ourselves okay we don't need to ask and we're not going to start

1284
01:15:11.920 --> 01:15:20.640
aligning with the unaccessible well that's not true okay this is 2025 no one's really

1285
01:15:21.660 --> 01:15:28.280
inaccessible okay there's some way to access you okay whether it's phone social media

1286
01:15:28.280 --> 01:15:38.020
zoom call like driving how do i how do i not get myself in slotted into a friendship

1287
01:15:39.140 --> 01:15:44.680
or maybe that's just my fear that's a fear and so that's where i want you to spend time

1288
01:15:44.680 --> 01:15:50.900
with holy spirit like what is that fear rooted in where what does where does the

1289
01:15:50.900 --> 01:15:56.760
where does that feel similar where does that fear where does that where did that fear come

1290
01:15:57.760 --> 01:16:02.460
spend time with holy spirit and reveal okay lord what is it that you're wanting to show me right

1291
01:16:03.460 --> 01:16:11.080
now i'm operating in fear but you've you've yeah i mean clearly he's opened the door for this guy

1292
01:16:11.080 --> 01:16:16.320
to come into your life at some way shape and form we don't know what that looks like whether he's

1293
01:16:16.320 --> 01:16:23.280
your spirit mate or not but we have to trust that god cares enough about you and he's gonna

1294
01:16:23.280 --> 01:16:29.320
take you through this process and i think part that may be making this worse and i have hardly

1295
01:16:29.320 --> 01:16:35.240
ever uttered this out loud so when i first met him 25 years ago god spoke to me in an audible

1296
01:16:35.240 --> 01:16:43.660
voice about him like before a word was out of his mouth and i'm like okay and then a month later a

1297
01:16:43.660 --> 01:16:49.100
prophetic person came up to me and verbatim said what the lord has said to me and i said oh i

1298
01:16:49.100 --> 01:16:53.900
already know all that about him and that he would be a good man for me to marry i know that

1299
01:16:54.320 --> 01:17:01.460
and she said you know i said yeah i know and she said are you sure this isn't the man for you i

1300
01:17:01.460 --> 01:17:09.320
said no i'm not sure but he's marrying somebody else and i'm happy for her yeah so this story if

1301
01:17:09.320 --> 01:17:16.040
god's in it started 25 years ago and i have had no control in any of this but makes me so worried

1302
01:17:16.040 --> 01:17:21.640
that somehow i'll miss it if it's god you're not gonna miss what god has for you

1303
01:17:23.040 --> 01:17:26.660
we gotta let's get to the root of that belief right there

1304
01:17:27.520 --> 01:17:30.040
that you're gonna miss something that god has for you

1305
01:17:32.300 --> 01:17:34.000
because that's just not our god

1306
01:17:35.420 --> 01:17:47.280
all right yeah what he has for us cannot be stolen and what gets stolen must be redeemed

1307
01:17:48.900 --> 01:17:58.000
okay okay yep so you are in the right place we've got you you're gonna have a lot of emotions

1308
01:17:58.000 --> 01:18:04.300
lots of things that are going to surface it's okay it's perfectly normal okay keep

1309
01:18:04.720 --> 01:18:13.800
keep contact with us keep keep us in the loop okay spend time with god process the stuff

1310
01:18:13.800 --> 01:18:19.580
what's he revealing to you in this moment all right this is preparation period too whether

1311
01:18:19.580 --> 01:18:25.760
this man is your spirit mate or not yeah it's a preparation period okay yeah that the lord has

1312
01:18:26.000 --> 01:18:32.120
told me that like when i first got here i'm like okay god i'm stuck here at this house he's like

1313
01:18:32.120 --> 01:18:36.460
okay well you want things to go faster right i said yeah he goes do you have any clothes because

1314
01:18:36.460 --> 01:18:43.520
you just lost 40 pounds i said it's like i don't even have and i will tell you this movement this

1315
01:18:43.520 --> 01:18:49.420
movement when it first started five years ago jackie had the the word acceleration on this

1316
01:18:49.720 --> 01:18:54.100
movement and i will tell you in five years there's been acceleration in this movement

1317
01:18:54.100 --> 01:19:02.160
okay and people's love stories and just this community in general like so just know

1318
01:19:02.640 --> 01:19:09.080
like you're not alone we got you god's got you that's the important thing to remember

1319
01:19:09.200 --> 01:19:14.720
is that god's got you and he's bringing you in a season of preparation because he's he's got

1320
01:19:14.720 --> 01:19:22.960
something for you and he's not going to um let it be taken from you thanks and sorry i'm so intense

1321
01:19:22.960 --> 01:19:29.560
i can get really worked up about like this topic you're not you're not doing anything that i didn't

1322
01:19:31.120 --> 01:19:38.160
do i relate to so many of you women on so many levels you have no idea y'all could see where i

1323
01:19:38.160 --> 01:19:45.320
was at five years ago and two years ago and three years ago and all that stuff like oh my word so

1324
01:19:45.320 --> 01:19:54.120
um but ladies we are out of time i apologize um laura kim helen please put your post in the app

1325
01:19:54.880 --> 01:19:59.980
um mary i know this is your last one did you want to give a quick i think you said you had

1326
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:06.520
quick word. I'm gonna let you release that and then we'll head out and then I will see

1327
01:20:06.520 --> 01:20:08.720
you ladies next week. So Mary what you got for us?

1328
01:20:09.780 --> 01:20:16.040
Sure it was just, God speaks to me in films and it was just something when Meg was talking

1329
01:20:16.040 --> 01:20:21.060
and when you're talking about the cart before the horse. Have you ever seen the film Seabiscuit?

1330
01:20:22.000 --> 01:20:29.720
It's a true story about a horse and I won't go into too much detail because I want to spoil

1331
01:20:29.720 --> 01:20:38.220
the movie but there's a part in it when they're having to train the horse at night and the

1332
01:20:38.220 --> 01:20:45.660
jockey can't see out of one eye, he's quite blind and he said I can't see out there and

1333
01:20:45.660 --> 01:20:54.120
this just makes me Holy Ghost and the trainer said it's okay because he can and that was

1334
01:20:54.680 --> 01:21:01.180
God just like you can't see the way but you're on you've got God's got you and he can see the way

1335
01:21:01.180 --> 01:21:05.080
and it was just and it oh wow I'm just feeling so.

1336
01:21:07.200 --> 01:21:13.040
Meg I hope you receive that I felt that that's so beautiful. Mary thank you so much for sharing.

1337
01:21:13.840 --> 01:21:20.060
It's been such a pleasure to get for me too and Christine misses everybody as well and she says

1338
01:21:20.060 --> 01:21:25.480
hi so and just yeah it's you know it's such an honor and a privilege and a blessing to me

1339
01:21:25.560 --> 01:21:34.340
to walk this path which with each of you ladies and you know I just thank God every day that I

1340
01:21:34.460 --> 01:21:42.380
get to walk on this journey alongside each of you. It blesses me tremendously more than I can even

1341
01:21:44.840 --> 01:21:52.660
express so just know that ladies I just adore each and every one of you. I'm here for you.

1342
01:21:53.380 --> 01:22:00.780
Don't be shy. Let us know what's going on if you you know didn't get to speak on today's

1343
01:22:00.780 --> 01:22:07.460
keep showing up on our calls post in the community all right connect with other women in this

1344
01:22:07.460 --> 01:22:15.740
community this it's there's so many blessings here if you receive them and you take the open

1345
01:22:16.460 --> 01:22:22.580
invitation but like I said before ladies it's just again an honor and a privilege to walk this

1346
01:22:22.580 --> 01:22:30.160
journey with you and I just I just my heart sings with so much joy every time like I see breakthrough

1347
01:22:30.160 --> 01:22:35.340
in each and every one of you and Mary that's definitely happened with you and it's just

1348
01:22:35.900 --> 01:22:40.920
awesome and don't worry I'm going to keep my eyes I keep my eyes on you ladies.

1349
01:22:42.380 --> 01:22:45.540
I always know how my girls are going like how are they doing?

1350
01:22:46.780 --> 01:22:51.560
I just want to say I was so encouraged by um Ebony's post as well that she's looking forward

1351
01:22:51.560 --> 01:22:57.280
to seeing my engagement on next hour. I'm not actively dating but the Lord's taken me full

1352
01:22:57.280 --> 01:23:02.860
circle in two areas so back to my old church back to my old gym I'm actually meeting other people

1353
01:23:02.860 --> 01:23:11.680
um I've a girl's just joined my work and she's a Christian and you know so we're meeting up and

1354
01:23:11.680 --> 01:23:15.620
we're going to socialize together as part of work and stuff and

1355
01:23:15.620 --> 01:23:20.980
I just yeah I'm constantly thinking six and six degrees of Kevin Bacon

1356
01:23:23.680 --> 01:23:25.000
of separation.

1357
01:23:34.540 --> 01:23:42.220
I love you all have a wonderful rest of you too don't forget to look for gold in the men

1358
01:23:42.220 --> 01:23:46.780
and let us know what those qualities and characteristics are that you find attractive

1359
01:23:46.980 --> 01:23:52.780
and what do you see attractive in men this week maybe you're just observing them maybe you're not

1360
01:23:52.780 --> 01:23:57.660
even interacting with them but if you want to like make eye contact smile with them like let

1361
01:23:57.660 --> 01:24:03.900
them help you doesn't matter what age they are all right men like to be helpers all right they

1362
01:24:03.900 --> 01:24:10.640
like to do that so let them do that all right and then um keep us posted okay love you ladies.