Okay, man, I'm so excited to be with you for our check-in.
I have A, I'm always here to talk dating advice with you, but I actually pulled up my copy
of the heart work from when I did it back in 2021.
Bethany is going to start to give me notes that she gave to David of like things to kind
of go over because I don't see that guy that was here.
Who was the guy that was here a couple the last time?
Tim.
Yeah, but he's not here tonight.
Okay.
Well, I was thinking of Tim going, well, you know, we're going to always have new people.
And so there's always topics I'd love for us to revisit.
Um, oh my gosh, you guys, you're also good looking.
I mean, y'all, like, are we sure you're I'm okay.
So I'm like talking sideways.
Let's talk dating first.
And then I have a couple topics we can talk about tonight, but I'm really excited to see
all of you tonight.
Okay.
So David, right.
You had three zoom dates.
Did any of them go anywhere?
Yeah.
So I, I kind of need the council of, of the, of the table here.
So, uh, yeah, I, uh, one person.
So I've been talking with somebody for five weeks now and, uh, after my first spotlight,
they found me and, uh, she just said, she said, Hey, I got sent it.
She wasn't there, but she said, I got sent it by six different people.
And even one of the coaches was like, Hey, you need to give this guy a shot.
You're in his age range.
Um, and so we have now gone on, uh, we've gone on two dates and, uh, yeah, it's pretty
awesome.
Do you mean video dates?
Are you guys local?
No.
In real life.
So we've video dates.
Yeah.
So video dates probably about like 20 at this point, but real life dates too.
Shut up.
Okay.
Wait, you're in Canada, right?
Yeah.
Where is, who is it?
Do we get to know?
Yeah.
You can know Evelyn in Ottawa.
I am so excited.
I don't know Evelyn.
And so, uh, we, uh, we, uh, got inspired by your and Brian's talk and because you were
all talking about community dating, right?
So we kind of made a plan and I said, Hey, uh, would it be okay if I went to your church
on Sunday?
So I woke up at six 40 in the morning and I drove for two and a half hours to her church
and I wasn't praying or doing any of that.
And so we were, cause we're trying to like, you know, separate church and state.
But I said, Hey, even if I just get to meet some of your people at the end of church,
that's enough for me.
And so she said, well, my people don't show up until the 9am service, not the 1130.
And I said, well, let's go to the 9am.
And so we met her friends and her friends were smart and good friends.
And they said, you came here just to meet us for five minutes.
And I said, absolutely.
And they said, I looked at her and said, this is a good man.
We approve.
And, uh, yeah, so that went really well.
So what's your question for the men?
Sorry.
So, sorry.
Getting to the point.
So the question is, is that, um, we, I went dancing and before dancing, I wanted to establish
and I said, Hey, I'm okay if we hold hands because I've grew up dancing.
I know in dancing, you hold hands.
Right.
And I said, Hey, I know we're both trying to follow the rules and be really careful
here.
But I said like, at this point, I am okay if we hold hands.
And so she said, she said, I'm okay with it too, but you just review that with the council.
And she said, if this is something that we have to peel back a bit, and if your council
says, Hey, that's, that's too early or too soon, she says, I'm okay with that.
Um, and so, yeah, we went dancing and had a great time and, uh, yeah.
Okay.
But it's been five weeks, right?
You said five weeks, five weeks of, of talking.
I actually, cause I asked the Holy spirit and I said, Lord, is this from you?
And he said, no count from when your first message was.
And so the first message was five weeks ago.
Okay.
Perfect.
Um, so I mean, dancing is kind of different than like, what kind of dancing y'all doing?
Like West coast, uh, tango.
So I guess like, I don't know, maybe I made a mistake, but like, it's free in the park.
So in, in Canada, we like, we like to dance.
So like in our, in our city parks, we often have like free tango classes.
So we did like a, it's like a little lesson for an hour and then a free dance for an hour.
So that was great.
No, I mean, tango is great.
It's just, let's just say there's a little more heat packed into a tank than like a waltz,
right?
There, Jesus was in the middle.
We left room for Jesus with us.
We were dancing like this.
It was like middle school, like Jesus was present.
How often are you guys chatting with each other?
Every day every day. Yeah. Okay. So do you think you guys are talking to other people right now? I
Kind of stopped
Talking to other people just because I thought yeah, I was like I kind of liked the direction this was going
And so I also like due to your encouragement. I went back on online dating and just got swamped and
And and I was like I got 300 inquiries and I was like this is too many
And I took all Jackie's advices like I hired a photographer and we got professional pictures and
Yeah, I was like I said
I'm just gonna talk to people with the zoom and then I was like
Really? Like I just kind of want to talk to her but I don't want to like skip
Where is she at?
Like like yeah, no, she wants to be exclusive I think so here's so um
Jackie calls it like three level three. I call it 3a and 3b
You know cuz I'm the one that has to live it out. So I think it is. Okay, you guys have been talking long enough. I
Think it's okay to say hey Evelyn, you know, I'm really enjoying
Getting to know you I'm not sure where you're at
But I'm really comfortable
Pausing talking to other people and us just figuring out where we
each other is going
That's different than what I call 3b
Which is like she's my girlfriend. We're showing up hand in hand
She's my plus one at all of the dates and just say like look, you know
We're still getting to know each other but like the hand-holding stuff is the stuff that you would do
At phase three, you know, and so when it's just one person so if you want to be right
Did you skip a step no
No, I mean all of the video calls okay, that was level two and
You've had a couple in person days
I mean you obviously may want to I mean Jackie always says like when someone's long-distance she wants you to
You know, she wants you to at least get like four, you know dates or you know for
Within four video dates to get in a live visit. And so you guys how far away do y'all live from each other?
Did I lose him or like she lives in Ottawa so that's like where she lives
I'm
We're
Where she lives it's about like two and a half hours three hours
So, oh, so she's got a little bit of distance for me to get to Ottawa's two hours, but she lives in the other end
Yeah, okay. So you guys are doing yeah, and so that's why I was like we were like like
Yeah, which is why which is why it took kind of so long to meet just because yeah, there's distance there right so
Are you is your intention to get to her every week now?
Yeah, I think we both kind of made that commitment of being like hey like
You know, we'll make the plan to try to like see each other
every weekend and
Yeah, we're gonna take turns. I
Think it's okay for you to tell her you don't want you to you want to put all your focus on her right now
I think that's different than saying will you be my girlfriend? I'm committed to like potentially getting married to you
Do you know what I'm saying?
I think it's especially when it's long-distance bright Brian was ready to say that after the first week and I was just like now
But um, I
Think that five weeks in and with a couple dates under your belt with that kind of distance and you guys committing to seeing each
Other every weekend. I think it's okay to say like hey, I've paused that other stuff
You know, I can't make you pause either but she'll probably it sounds like she'll probably say oh my gosh
I want to pause too. And then that's all you have to define what that means right now
You don't have to define anything else on what that means
But it does give you a little latitude on the hand-holding thing to knowing that you're not out there on other dates with other people
yeah, yeah, and
I mean I prayed about it too and I was like praying but for me
It was important that I established that before we went dancing because dancing you're basically holding hands the entire time anyways
and so for me like yeah, I just wanted to make sure that like
That she knows that that we're not just doing this like oh, it's kind of way to skirt around the levels because we're dance
Yeah, I like that. We had the conversation for
Yeah, and that's that verbal consent and I said like hey, we're about to go dancing and then dancing you're basically
She's never taken a dance lesson and I grew up dancing
My parents said there's nothing more mammal than a man who knows how to dance
so my
Me and my five brothers all knew how to dance and like shoot guns and cut wood.
And that was part of being a man was you knew how to dance.
Um, and so very quickly, I don't want to take all the time, but I, so like two
things kind of happened, which is follow-up is one, is it like, cause I
know last year single is like, okay, like don't pray, don't kind of do ministry
together, just get to know each other.
So was going to church with her too much because we, her and I kind of went
through it and she kind of didn't want the after, like didn't want me to meet
her friends at her lunch, but for me, I kind of saw it as, look, we're in
community anyways, and we are article going on thing, you know, on, on Sundays
and Saturdays.
So to me, it's not really any different than what we've already been doing.
We're just sitting in church together.
And so I, that was kind of my reasoning, but.
I mean, I think it's okay because you've spent so much time
building a foundation with her.
So when we ask folks to not do church together and pray together, it's
especially in those first few weeks when you're just like getting to know somebody.
So it kind of sounds like you're already past that.
So I think you're fine, David.
I mean, I think that you're doing a broad enough amount of stuff with
her that I think you're fine.
Okay.
And then the other question was, is that I, I woke up this
morning and I felt so much guilt.
I felt like the kind of guilt is like, you know, when you do, when
you go too far with a girl, right?
Like I'm still a virgin, but like, you know, that you feel that feeling,
everybody in this call knows it, that feeling of like, Oh, sorry.
Oh, shoot.
I've just gone too far.
And now I, you know, like everybody's felt that feeling.
And so, but I was like, but Lord, like I didn't overshare.
We weren't physical.
There wasn't like, it was really like, we were really like careful with our
distance and really trying to respect each other and, and, and I was like, but
then why am I still feeling that feeling?
And I, and I just rebuked the enemy.
I was like, get behind me, Satan.
That was, that was my response.
I was just like, Hey, this is from the enemy because he doesn't like
that I'm trying to do a new thing.
Yeah.
That I'm trying to walk in victory.
Yeah.
Well, I'll let the other guys weigh in.
How do you know when it's the Holy spirit convicting you versus
you just getting in your own head?
Mike, did you want to give some thoughts on that?
Is that why your hands raised?
Go for it, bub.
I'm sure I'm having a hard time unmuting.
So I just want to give you props, David.
Like it's just, I mean, to me, you're already in a three, you
just haven't made it official.
I mean, like the fact that you're doing these things, I'm like, you've
already crossed that threshold, whether you know, realize it or not.
But like, and tango, like, I'm like, if you're tangoing, holding
hands, this is a secondary thing, bro.
Like, but you know, like the holding hands, they're, they're, they're
holding hand is like way up the list and tango is like down the list.
So, but, but you know what, here's the thing.
Um, so it's the spirit, like your, uh, condemnation, right.
The, the, the Holy spirit would be like, Hey, you know what?
You should probably watch out for that.
Right.
Like, you know, uh, versus like you blew it.
Right.
That's the spirit of condemnation.
And that's completely from the enemy.
That's the, you know, that's him coming at you because the Holy spirit's
constructive, right?
It's like, Hey, if you get, if you continue down this road, be careful
because X will happen or whatever, or like, or, you know, like, um, so I
just, but I just want to give you props.
And it's just, it's a beautiful thing.
And I love your obedience.
Right.
I, you know, and like, I mean, and, and the honor, like, you know, I mean,
you're, you're, you're a mighty man of honor and like, that's such a
beautiful thing to see this nowadays.
And, um, I just, I just want to commend you, you know, I mean, not many, I
don't know, maybe a couple of guys on a hand that would have done what you've
done.
So I just give you, give you props.
That means a lot.
Yeah.
And to Mike's point, I just wouldn't have the Tango be something you do
every single night and every weekend.
Like, Oh no.
Yeah.
It's just, it was one of the things.
Yeah.
And I, I think too, is that it was the last session for the year.
And so, and I think like, and it was my idea, but she had said, like, she
was like, you know, I've always prayed that someone would come and do the
Tango with me.
She's like, you know, I always walk, I've been walking by this for 10
years and always wanted to do it.
And I, I like, she didn't bring it up at all and never mentioned it, but I
was just like, Hey, like there's, I know that there's a Tango in the
dance and Dave.
Yeah, that's probably wise.
There's some wisdom there.
Um, but you know what?
It was the last of the season.
And she just said, she's like, I, I've been prayed that someone will be
willing to go and dance with me in the square, so we'll just give it some
grace and you know, like I'm not looking, I'm looking her up, man.
Cause I'm.
Just nosy.
Let's see.
Can I send a picture in the chat?
Is that doable?
Yeah, man, that's even better.
How do I do that, Mike?
Is there a way to do that?
I'm not sure if you can do pictures.
I know you can do links, but not pictures.
I haven't tried pictures.
Well, if I can find her on the Facebook page,
I can show everybody what she looks like.
How does she spell her name?
Evelyn.
I don't know the way you spell Evelyn.
Like E-V-E and then Lynn?
She's not showing up.
That's why.
She's been in the program since 2021.
She's an OG.
That's why.
I know I know what she looks like.
It's bugging me.
Just share.
I can't share the name.
But I just think this is a great thing for all the rest of us
guys to be like, you know, I'm challenged to actually think
of steps, right?
I don't know about you.
Oh, E-V, and then she spells it E-V and then L-Y-N-E.
Yeah.
Oh, she's beautiful.
Yeah.
Is this her?
That's her, yeah.
Y'all.
OK, wait, let me get, let's see if I've
got any more photos of her.
Because that's just, oh.
Thanks, guys.
This is, this means a lot.
I was so worried.
I was like, oh, no, what if like the Council of the Elders,
like, I'm going to be one of the reasons I wasn't.
Those are the only two photos.
Yeah.
But she's adorable.
Look at you guys together.
You look so cute.
Slight clarification, are we the Council of Elders here?
Yes.
OK, because I was like, who is he talking about?
He's talking about y'all.
OK, so, and we get to do Monday nights however you guys want.
Sometimes I'll have teaching.
Sometimes David will.
Sometimes Jackie will.
You might actually start seeing, someday,
you might start seeing Brian.
And so, OK, so we feel good.
You're going to tell her that you guys have inched
your way to level three without even realizing it.
But it's just 3A.
You don't have to worry about calling each other,
boyfriend or girlfriend.
But now, I mean, but it is fun to like,
when you guys have these longer dates,
you know, because one of you is going to come to town
for a whole day, right?
Is that what you're going to start doing?
Yeah.
So that's how you slip in an afternoon
or a lunch with other people,
is it was so much time together.
It's easy to start booking that.
And I just, there's a girl I'm coaching in the community
because she's dating a guy too.
And it's been a couple months now.
And I said the same thing.
I said, it's time for you to start putting him
in front of people.
And I said, you don't want to put it in front of the people
who are going to be like, oh my gosh, oh my gosh.
No, but you want to put it in front of people
you trust and admire that have made
healthy relationship decisions.
And you want to be able to like, do a fun thing with them.
Go bowling, go putt-putt, you know, not take,
no, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
We went apple picking was the first date.
Apple picking?
Yeah.
So cute, oh my God.
Yeah, so we went and picked apples.
Although there's a lot you can say about the apple,
putting it between your teeth for a tango dance.
Hey, she did go for the kiss on the first date.
And I just said, I just said, hey, you know what?
I said, I got to get out of here before I'm in trouble.
I said, time to run.
And she laughed and laughed.
And I said, and she said, thank you for giving boundaries.
And I was like, what?
No one's ever thanked me for not falling through before.
Yeah, I'm really excited for you
and we'll be praying for you.
And we're your, you know, we are your accountability group.
So David, yeah, like there's,
part of dating in community is this.
It's you guys holding each other accountable
and checking in for sure.
Okay, okay.
So I want to, so I'm going to actually,
I want to check in with all of you tonight
and see where you're at in your dating world
and your heart healing world.
But seriously, if you came online,
next Tuesday night is a combination,
it's a community event.
We're going to do some he said, she said, single spotlight.
I will say, David, I'm going to encourage you
to not let me put you in the spotlight.
Okay.
Because I feel like if I were her,
that would make me really uncomfortable.
Yeah.
She loved the second spotlight.
I had one person who I was talking with
and they said, you know, after your second spotlight,
she was like, I don't think we're a match.
She's like, you know, you're just a little too like funny.
And-
Oh my gosh, but you know what?
Great, right?
Yeah.
And she just said,
You know, like she didn't like my seven foot,
seven foot tall and plays guitar joke.
But, but everyone thought it was hilarious.
She's like, people take themselves way too seriously.
And so she said it was good that you gave that humor.
Well, tell her I apologize.
I didn't realize y'all were, you, you kept it under wraps.
So I didn't know about her,
else I wouldn't have put you in the spotlight so quickly.
It's still pretty early, like I think it's still early, so.
It is still early, so it was good.
All right, so I want you all to show up next Tuesday night.
I want you to all look good.
And I want you to see how the camera is,
like the light is facing me.
We got a nice picture behind me.
I can see my face, but it's not so much
that it's like this, right?
So you want to make sure you got it going on.
John, I could see you really well.
David, I could see you well.
Mike, you're kind of lounging, it's just the dudes.
So I don't know if you're remotely even interested
in being spotlighted anymore,
but there's a bunch of new women that have come in
since you were spotlighted before.
David, I don't know, David, have we spotlighted you yet?
Yeah, I'm the one with the 31 ugly Christmas sweaters
from like a year ago.
Wait, you got spotlighted a year ago?
Yeah, about around that time.
Was I, you know, cause I took a little hiatus.
So was I, I may have missed it.
I think it was, I think you had missed it.
Long story short, I moved cross country.
Where are you now?
You're in Illinois?
Oh, okay.
Where, yeah, where no one else is, so.
You and a bunch of other fields, man.
Yeah, but-
I've been to Iowa, it is beautiful,
but okay, so you're in Iowa.
Yeah, in a doctorate program for chiropractic.
Nice.
My social life went out the window.
This is like the first men's meeting
I've been able to get to in life.
My nephew, my niece's husband
is just finishing up that program.
Bless his heart, he's always studying.
It's as bad as my seminary program.
I'm currently studying 241 questions
for an exam on Wednesday.
And it's like-
Well, I'm honored.
Okay, do you think you'll be able
to come on next Tuesday night?
I'll make time for it.
What about you, John?
Yeah.
You gonna come, John?
Yeah, I remember where I was last week.
I was at a concert, that's where I was.
Well, all right, I'm letting it go.
Okay, Christopher DeLuca, is it DeLuca?
How do you say that, your name?
You gonna be there next week too?
I probably can be.
Well, I mean, this is only if you guys wanna meet girls.
I mean, there's like 200 women that come to these suckers.
All right, I just took a screenshot of all of you.
I better see-
Oh, no, I was looking down and made a weird face.
Oh, no.
It's okay, it's just for me.
Okay, cool.
This is just for me, just so I can, I mean, yeah.
Okay, so Mike went off camera.
So I'm gonna come back to him.
David from Pennsylvania,
catch me up on what's going on in your life.
Hey, I don't know, just general stuff,
hard work stuff, or-
Yeah, hard work, date.
Tell me how you deal with the hard work
and how you deal with dating.
Yeah, I'm not dating right now,
but David Wright from Canada is in the middle
of getting me introduced to someone
that I apparently years ago wasn't worked for.
So, yeah.
I actually have three people now
that I wanna introduce you to,
but I'll email you,
because there's three people who I,
I showed one girl at church her picture
and she said, why haven't you introduced me to that man?
He's so good looking.
So I'll send you her picture today
and you can see if you're interested.
Okay, are they near you in Kingston
or to Ottawa, it's like the first one
you already told me about, or?
They're near me in Kingston,
but they're willing, they all have said,
oh, I love Pennsylvania, I'll go to Pennsylvania.
David, how old are you?
I'm a young 51.
Okay, I'm gonna show you a picture of somebody.
She's my single girlfriend.
She was dating a guy.
Well, let me ask you this, I will warn you.
She's got four girls.
Are you remotely interested in becoming a parent?
Well, was it, not that it matters that much,
but I'm just curious, is she divorced or widowed?
She's divorced.
Okay.
Her husband,
he has a very severe porn addiction.
I'm sorry.
They were doing counseling
and she thought things were going well, but not.
Yeah, that's like a very deep material. That's it's sad. I'm sorry. Well, and it's hard because
The guy that she was dating
she met through
online and mutual friends, but he was like 15 my age like 58 or 59 and
he has two grown kids and I had a feeling the kids was gonna end up being an issue and
They were doing a lot of dating in my opinion
This is the downside when you have kids like I know you don't want to introduce them to a guy right away
But the downside is you can fall in love with each other, but someone's still a parent and if you pretend that that's not true
Then you know you can get hurt
You can yeah, okay
Her name is Jackie and she's in the program too. She actually she actually heads up the single-city Nashville stuff
Okay, so
I could tell her to be online next week and you guys can maybe
Interact in the chat or something. Do it Rizzo. I
Just want her to be a really good man
And you're perfect. I think she's like 14 my age
146 so
It's just something you just need you well between David's people and me sending you to people you just need to start
Dating. Yeah. Well, I mean I have a little issue now because my passports expired
So I can't cost in the Canada like the good old days you need more than just a driver's license now
So I grew up in Buffalo, New York, and I would hop across over in a Toronto, you know growing up
I didn't know you could cross the border without a passport
It's a Canada back in the day. All you needed was your driver's license. You could drive right over the bridge in Niagara Falls
It just depends on the on the guard so it's far easier to get into Canada
In level six man, he's you're awesome Dave
There is there anything you want to bring up or ask the team about or me about David
Um
Do you remember the little prophecy that David and Jackie Dorman God about David's coming into the program? I know it's real short
But oh, yeah, but like I I'm messing it up
From the field the Davids are coming in from the field
Okay. Yeah, that that's yeah
The reason I say cuz he hasn't like once he came in was after the last damn time they mentioned that so
hmm
Are you coming to the five-year reunion in Austin?
Yeah, I got a VIP. I went all out good cuz I will be there Brian and I will be there
But there's gonna be a lot of the girls in the program there
Okay, so that will be another great way for you to meet people
And
Like I'll promote you on my socials
Because there's a lot of there's a lot of singles. I live in Nashville
There's a lot of singles in mine. There's a lot of single women in this community. Oh
No pressure
Okay, let me show you a picture of another person who I absolutely adore she does not have kids she's amazing
Can't be real with you
I find myself being a little bit shy because of recent events that happened in my life
But not nice much that but because I grew up with only two brothers no sisters
So that makes it even more kind of distorted how you see women and just being honest
No, like what does that mean? Like are you picky about what she has to look like? Tell me what does this mean?
it
It's a title. I mean, I but yeah
I've gotten over most of it
But what it means is it's a lot easier to get sucked into lies and objectification on the negative side
Because you didn't have to live with them growing up
You know I'm saying and and instead of seeing them as people and human beings, you know, I'm saying
All right, somebody spit tell me in English. What is he trying to tell me? What's he trying to tell me?
I'm speaking neurodivergent speak
Okay, I love it, okay
Okay, David
Shanna
Shauna she's also amazing. She just okay. So she does not live here in Franklin, but she comes here all the time
she lives I forget where but she's like a major director of a
Retirement home, but she just wrote a play that's actually being shopped around in Nashville
So, yeah really kind of she's really kind of interesting too, okay, so I appreciate it
I did. Okay, wait, hold on. Okay, you guys are so darn cute.
Okay. All right. Well, we're gonna keep working on you. All
right, john. Yeah, let's do one.
I'm doing a
tank just hanging out. Going out.
Are you? Huh? Are you dating?
Ah, yes. Well, I'm, I've been dating a woman, but it's been
like a situation ship. And she's really so this is what she's
really nice. I really like her. I just can't.
Who's making it a situation ship you or her?
It would be me. And this is this is becoming a pattern. This is
like the third one. Oh, yeah. And it's like, but I but the
bad thing is, I kind of know from the get go. And I'm just
going, well, they're really nice. Just, you know, give them
a chance. But I but I kind of pretty much knew from the
beginning. It wasn't like someone that I thought that I
would want to pursue to marry.
So okay, so if she's not somebody you want to pursue,
then why are you still talking to her?
Exactly. Because she's really nice. And and she's easy to
hang out with. She's we have
does she like you? Does she really like you?
So that's so we've been like, on and off breaking it up. But
then
how long have you been on and offing?
Probably like six months.
It's kind of like she's like, Oh, we can be friends. We'll
just hang out. And then we just
yeah, I have a girlfriend who's there's a guy that she's been
dating for a year. That's kind of pulling that crap with her.
Well, we can keep hanging out. No.
It's not just me either. I mean, I like hanging out with her
though.
No, I know. You're both paying bad. No. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
You're you're how old are you john?
63? Well, actually, this month, I'll be in October. I'll be 64.
Okay, so let me ask you, then let me ask you a question. Do you
actually want to be with? Are you? Have you ever been married?
Yeah, my wife passed away. I've been married twice. My wife
passed away in 2019. I have five kids. So that's the other thing
too. So I've been there. You know, as I'm kind of at first, I
wanted to get remarried after she passed away, because I'm so
used to it. And now I've gotten used to
it's actually very common for widowed people. They want to
touch back very quickly. But if they get past that window, then
they don't anymore. And the bigger question is, you may not
want to like and that's okay. Then but then you would not be
the 3m guy, you'd be the guy that's just I'm hang out. I
mean, and there are plenty of women who either a feel the same
way as you do just want to hang out and then that's fine. Or you
guys are just passing the time. The problem is, um, David, yes,
we are recording. And the problem is, it is going to stop
you from meeting somebody that you actually married.
And I know if I do meet someone that, that I would want to get
married, but I just haven't met that person.
Okay, so let me ask you a question. What are you doing?
What effort are you putting into to meet and go out with other
women?
I've been going to like meetup groups and stuff and meeting
women like that. That's how I met this one. And it's kind of,
I kind of liked a little meetup group because we kind of go out
and, and she's part of it. And that's part of it.
Okay, but you're not going to meet a different woman.
I'm going to a different meetup group to where they have events.
I've been doing that. And so I've met a couple other people,
but not and at least I haven't pursued anymore, knowing that I
wasn't interested from the get go.
Where do you live, John?
I'm in Brentwood. I'm in Northern California, San Francisco
Bay Area.
Okay.
At Walnut Creek.
Okay. Well, there's a lot of women your age in the community.
Yeah, I know.
Are you, do you think you might be interested in any of them or
you don't know?
You know, I don't know. And I have a hard time telling who's
my age and who's not my age.
Okay, well, I can fix that next Tuesday night.
Okay. And I'm kind of, I'm, I will be honest, I'm kind of
setting my ways. I don't really, you know, want to be moving
like far. Or I mean, I figure if God's got someone for me, he's
got someone close. I don't need
So are you, so are you willing to date long distance if she's willing to move to you?
Or no?
You might as well be honest.
You'd have to be really special.
I mean, it would have to be like, well, tell, ask me, tell me why you joined the program,
John.
What do you, what do you, what are you trying to get out of this program?
Just to reconnect and not just sit at home because, you know, so to, to have a fellowship
and reconnect and, you know, I figure if, if there's someone out there, God can, you
know, bring him, you know, have somebody close by, or I'm sure there's people in the group
who are semi-close.
So I don't know, friends of friends or something.
All right, well, I say come next Tuesday.
Okay.
Let's give it a shot.
See if we can find some local ladies that are your age and we'll, we'll see.
It's one thing to do.
Okay.
Why didn't you bring that up earlier?
Because I, I forgot.
Okay.
So she, so David Wright is telling us, I'm going to, I'll jump in and answer this question.
She brings up age a lot.
Tell me, what does she say about age?
How old is she?
She's 43 and I'm 33.
Okay.
What is she saying about it?
Well, like today she said that she feels like we're in a different generation and that like,
I don't always get all her references.
And I just said, Hey, like I get them, like you're the same age as my, my brothers.
So it's not, it's not a big deal for me.
Here's what, you know what, you know what though?
I would nip it in the bud.
I would just say Evelyn, cause she's older than you.
So it might be code for, she's feeling uncomfortable that she's the older person.
And you know, traditionally it's okay when the guy's older, but not the girl.
And so I think it's okay for you to say, Evelyn, is age an issue for you?
Is our age difference a yellow flag for you?
I'd be straight up with her.
Like you, you've brought it up a number of times.
I just need to see how much of a concern this is for you.
It's not a concern for me, but my age isn't going to change.
So I'm just trying to get, I'm just curious.
That's how you ask.
I'm curious how concerned you are about this.
That's what I would do.
That's a good answer.
Yeah.
I'm just curious.
Because you'll say I'm good with it, but what I don't want to do is have you keep bringing
it up and then three or six months from now, it's like the thing.
Because I can't change my age.
I get your references.
Even if I were the same age, that doesn't mean I'd always get your jokes.
I mean, Brian is only four years older than me, but he watches movies.
I don't like, I'm going to, I'm going to embarrass myself because the guy who's doing the ceremony
of the wedding, him and Brian went on this whole riff because I've never seen the princess
bride.
And so they were doing the whole thing, the wedding ceremony.
And I had no idea this whole joke.
Inconceivable.
Marriage brings us together today.
To celebrate that blessed arrangement.
See?
So you guys all know.
As you wish.
So all that to say, you could be in the same age, like you guys are 20 years younger than
him and you still know what he's talking about.
So that was an official movie in college.
I mean, it's just, I mean, I've heard it's just an official movie.
I will need to watch it apparently at some point.
Okay.
Um, Tim, I see you and Christopher, you guys aren't on camera yet, so I'm not going to
call on you yet.
David 40 in Iowa.
We started to talk about you.
So you're in Iowa.
Did you move there for your job?
Uh, moved there for school, for chiropractic.
I'm sorry.
You already told me.
So when did you graduate?
Uh, at this point, uh, forever from now.
I understand.
Uh, yeah.
Uh, it's like 20, 29 probably.
Okay.
So you would need somebody who's either local or willing to come to you.
Pretty much.
That's okay.
And also wanted to have kids and within like five years, plus or minus is apparently difficult
to meet someone on that same level.
I've tried dating locally and it's more of a headache and robbing me of peace.
than instilling any sort of friendship or someone that's wanting to do stuff that grieves the Holy Spirit versus just develop a friendship, you know?
Or it's someone that wants to change me away from who I am to what they want, and I'm like, nah, I'm good, you know?
And I hate having that attitude. The last gal I dated, it kind of went in that direction, and I kept saying, hey, we're not doing this.
And she kind of went too far. I didn't really speak it out loud against her.
I started distancing myself from her in the sense of, okay, I'm recognizing very quickly that I am having less and less time to do anything.
I haven't even watched a TV show in the last three months to the point where I was just like, I should probably just cancel all my streaming services,
because at this point, it's just money that's not even going into anything.
Haven't played a video game, haven't gone out hiking. I get in my flow of working out twice a day.
I pledged a professional fraternity so that push comes to shove in three or four years, I can get a job anywhere.
I'm looking at Iowa to see what states are close to Iowa.
Illinois to the east, Wisconsin to the north, all those weirdos with cheese and Packers fans.
Okay, how far away are you from Wisconsin?
That was just a short joke, all you Wisconsin people on the call.
I see Iowa. Okay, Iowa. Oh my gosh, that's where Iowa is.
Yeah, so Green Bay is 244 miles by comparison. I should have done Milwaukee. I guess that's closer.
Yeah, I see it. Well, you guys are all amazing. I'm going to start putting my little feelers out.
But can you come on for a little bit next Tuesday night? You're going to make it work, right? You're going to make it work for a little bit.
I'll make it for Tuesday. It's just been Mondays have been exceptionally difficult.
Yeah, you're good. And here's the thing. I'm actually telling you that I'm going to be the one hosting it.
And I'm already telling you what kind of night it is. I'm going to cheat and make you guys, I'm going to let you guys look good.
Because that's what I do. I'm going to cheat.
She has powers, trust me.
You're under the impression I can look good?
No, no, yeah. But here's the things I'm going to go ask you to go find in your house because I'm going to ask the girls to do this.
But I'm not going to warn them.
Let's see, I'm going to make a list of random things and you guys can help change this list.
Like an ugly Christmas sweater?
No, no. Well, OK, but I was going to.
That's a Halloween one.
OK, no, I was going to do something as simple as first thing I was going to do is go to your cupboard.
Except for salt and pepper, find me a seasoning that you like to cook with.
That'll get me in trouble.
Why?
Because I like spicy things.
Perfect. I love it.
OK, another thing, that's something in the kitchen.
I might ask you to go find me a book.
And it's OK, David, for you to pull out your chiropractic book.
That's your I was going to say it's literally sitting next to me.
So that's the one you'll pull up.
OK, let's see.
Do you guys like our guys into because Brian has one here?
Well, we're starting to merge his stuff into my home.
See, there you go.
And he's got like a Pittsburgh Steeler blanket.
Do you guys all have like blankets of your team or something that you like?
There's also a Brian thing.
Do you guys have blankets?
Like if I don't, you don't have a blanket.
What do you do in your.
We're like sure.
Oh, yeah, a sport.
I'll say, yeah, go find something sports memorabilia.
OK, OK, I'll keep it simple.
Sports.
Oh, I'm going to go ask you to grab your toothpaste,
because that's how we'll see whether you squeeze from the bottom or the top.
Or you might have one of those fancy ones.
Oh, rollers.
Mm hmm.
You're going to grab your toothpaste.
And.
I'm going to go ask you to grab your old.
This one of your oldest items of clothing, it could be a hat pair of shoes in the closet.
And it could be that you don't have to necessarily wear it, but y'all like when I was cleaning out because I had to make room for Brian and my tiny little she shed. So I just pulled. See, there you go.
I pulled out y'all and it still fit. How is that? I still, I found my high school cheerleading letterman jacket in my closet. Sucker still fit too. So that would be fun for people to show up in something fun. Okay. Those are the five items. A seasoning you cook with, a book you're reading, something sports memorabilia, your toothpaste, just cause, um, oldest item in your closet.
All right, but you're going to have to like, pretend to leave the room and come back with it, you know, that will make it some fun. Okay. So David, you're in school. Life sucks a little bit right now. Totally feeling you glad you're here tonight. Um, but some girl is going to be okay with that. Brian was okay with me being in school.
I mean, he would argue that now he goes, now that he proofreads all my papers, he'll go, so what did we get on that paper? What did we get? He proofreads. So he thinks he gets the wee. He's about to read a 12 page paper on the doctrine of purgatory from medieval church. So he's going to be excited about, Hey, he, I said, Hey, I have to write a paper either about the early church or the medieval church. Do you care? And he goes, I would like the medieval church. I'm like, fair enough.
You're doing the proofreading. I'll let you pick. So it's actually, it's been fascinating. Okay. Christopher, thank you for putting a shirt on. I appreciate you. All right. Tell us how you are doing and let me know if you're going to be around. Do you have a problem with Packers fans? Wait, does somebody say that they had a problem with Packer fans?
Oh, okay. Okay. But go bears go. Oh, I see. I'm just slow. Oh my gosh. Y'all are so funny. All right. Christopher, how are you doing?
Oh, that's a loaded question. Hang on. Is this on? Can you hear me? Yep. I should turn up the game. Hold on. This microphone's old. I I'm trying to get used to this microphone. Uh, I'm that kind of a loaded question. Not great. In the grand scheme of things.
Sorry. Do you want to tell us or no?
Uh, I, I don't know.
Uh, give us the genre of what your concern is right now.
Uh, well, there's, there's a really long story with something that I was, I was kind of doing for a few months that I, I honestly not rather not get into, but, um, the, the dating life's not great and hasn't ever really been stellar, but it's just not great. I had, um, I had a date with somebody recently that just ended with the both of us agreeing not to see each other. So, okay.
Okay. Well, you know what? That's okay. Chris, will you be around? You've heard me chatter for the last 20 minutes. So will you be around next Tuesday night? And are you open to being spotlighted?
Uh, yeah, I can, I can make time the seventh, right?
Yeah. Now how old are you and where do you live?
34 Syracuse, New York.
Oh, perfect. Okay. So just so you guys know, when I do like exactly how David writes, looks your name, your age and your area, um, is really helpful because we only want women to kind of drop hankies to you that, that fit in your do hickey.
And so, um, because I'm going to kind of round robin it, it's really going to allow you to pay attention to what's going on in the chat this time, instead of like me concentrating a 30 minute conversation on you and you're like, oh my gosh, how do I read what women are saying?
And so it'll give you a chance to poke around and see what other women are answering and I'll make sure they do the same thing, that they have their name, their age and that their camera ready.
And so you might read somebody's answer in the chat going, oh my gosh, that's Sally and she's my age.
Let me go find her in the picture.
And then you go to the participation, then you can kind of find her and you can kind of scan the things.
Um, and then if you guys are interested, you can kind of like, you know, make a play, just say, and make a play.
Um,
I think I can be, I think I can be there next week.
I'll just be out of town.
Uh, I'll be, I'll be away on, on business, but I'll have a laptop with me.
Great.
Well, you know, just know that we're praying for you, dude.
And I'm sorry that you.
you're going through stuff, but this team of amazing men, they got your backs.
And so I love that you guys are all, here's what I love.
You guys, I don't ever remember this kind of season and Mike, you've been around long
enough.
You know what I'm talking about?
Like y'all are just here for each other, whether you're dating or not, you're like, I'm going
to support each other.
And I appreciate that because so many men don't have good guy friends, which is why
I want, you know, I just had this conversation with Brian.
I'm like, Brian, do you feel like you're meeting enough friends here?
Cause you know, he moved here for me and he's working and he's hanging out with all my friends,
but I'm like, I want you to feel like you can go find your own friends too.
So I really appreciate that you all, that you're all are doing that.
Um, Tim, hello Tim.
Okay.
So Tim, you're the person I was talking about tonight at the beginning, cause I have my
heart work book handy and tell, tell me, cause you're one of the newer folks on the
scene.
Um, how far are you into the book?
Um, I got stuck at the questions for chapter four.
I can't relate to any of them.
Okay.
Well I'm going to go to chapter four.
And I've been busy with work and I haven't done anything in like two weeks.
Okay.
Not a problem.
I'm glad you said that.
We're going to go to chapter four and we might find one of those questions to chat about.
Tell me how you're doing otherwise though.
Um, I'm busy and broke simultaneously.
Awesome.
Busy and broke.
Are you working right now?
Yeah.
I just got home from work.
I commissioned sales and I started a couple months ago, so it's not cash flowing that
well yet.
Yeah.
I get it.
Okay.
I get it.
And we're heading into the slow season, so I'm kind of concerned.
I'm sorry.
Is there anything else that you can do on the side to help you?
I'm not sure.
It's tough to do things on the side with my current job.
Over the winter I might just be able to say, Hey, don't give me leads.
Basically just lay me off for the winter or come back next spring.
But I can't do that yet.
What kind of sales are you in?
Residential exteriors.
So roofing, siding, doors, windows.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Sometimes I'm the annoying person that knocks on your door after a hailstorm.
Okay.
That's all right.
But you're a good looking guy, Tim.
So, you know, that's how you might meet your spirit mate right there knocking on her door.
Okay.
Where do you live?
Tell me where you live.
Minnesota.
Okay.
You look at you guys all up in the Midwest, man.
Up where it gets cold.
Okay.
All right, so this chapter is a lot about like the difference between your heart and
your soul and your mind.
So that's a good chapter though.
I mean, to kind of talk about that, the unhealthy heart is a great pretender.
It's a puzzle.
Oh my goodness, I love it.
When your heart is hurting, it wants the right things for all the wrong reasons.
It wants success only because it feels worthless.
It wants to help others, but only to prove it's good.
It wants expensive things because it can show off.
That broken heart will have you chasing shadows and living in a completely counterfeit life
that is unworthy of you and your true destiny.
So that chapter is a lot about making sure you are taking care of your heart and that
you feel loved and valued and that you remember that you belong to God first and foremost.
So Tim, I'm sorry you're going through that, Chris, I'm sorry that you are going through
you guys, that's real stuff.
And I know for men too, even more so than with women, it is really hard to date when
you feel like your career is a little out of whack because you're kind of like, I feel
like I need to bring something to the table.
So if that's not where you are right now, then continuing to be with these guys and
be friends is a great thing for your spirit in there.
So I'm glad you're here, Chris.
I'm glad you're here, Tim.
It'd be really easy for you guys to blow off tonight.
Mike, we started with you, but I didn't really get to check in and how you are doing.
Tell me how you're doing.
I'm doing amazing, but I just want to just speak to like Chris and Tim.
So we just break our hopelessness and things are coming.
Don't keep running, just stay healthy is all. He's got you, right?
We're kind of losing you, Mike.
So, prophetic word. But you know, you guys, the Lord's got you right where you are.
And he sees you, he knows your helplessness, he knows your pain.
He, you know, like Tim, he'll bring the rain, he'll bring what you need.
You just need to trust in him. And like, you know, this last week I had
hopelessness broken off of me. So, Lord, whatever you've done in me, I just pray
that you give to these men on this call. And that, Lord, the web that was enveloping
me, that was just sucking the life out of me that broke, I just pray any web
that's over these guys, we just plead the blood of Jesus over every single one of
them and that you would deliver them and bring them into the freedom because he
who descends that's free is free indeed. And we just, we just proclaim freedom
in Jesus name. Amen. Sorry, I was in my little warfare mode.
So, Mike's doing really good. I don't know, like, even though my circumstances
haven't changed, you know, like last week, I jiggerized my church.
It was kind of funny because the Lord's like, because we're doing prophetic words
and the Lord's like, I want you to hoo-hoo-hoo over people. So I was like,
hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo over, you know, like, because I'm a jigger, right? And I just,
I just released the jigger anointing over all you all in joy. I just more joy over
every one of you guys. Right. You know, and I just appreciate y'all. But, um,
I have a funny dating history and, um, and, you know, part of it, Rene, but like,
I have visions, the Lord's like this, and it seems like prophetesses are really
hard to connect with. I don't know, whatever. But like, I have a call on my
life and there's has to be a call on my wife as well. Right. You know, and they're
and like, not just anybody. I mean, well, Rene, I mean, like, you know, like what
you're going through with your ministry. Right. Like it's not everybody that can
walk along. I need a peer to walk alongside. I go to the gates of hell quite
often, and it's not really something for people who, you know, my ex got
obliterated by the enemy. Right. And like, and I, I'm not going to watch that again.
Yeah. You know, and so, um, you know, so I just, the Lord's like, you know, I had a
vision, the scale at this church anyways, you know, and I'm like, Lord, okay, we'll
make it. So, uh, he has, he has stopped me from doing long distance dating and it's
annoying as all get out. Right. Like, you know, I feel like there's a kibosh. I have
money for a ring. I have money for a wedding. I am like, Lord, let's go. And he's
like, yeah, no, take your time. So, so I won't be there. You know, like it's kind
of a pointless journey to me there Tuesday. Cause it's just a matter of, I don't
want to, um, you don't think there's any girls in your area that are in the
community that weren't there a year ago? I know I'm in a single city spotlight.
See, here's the thing is I'm looking for somebody who's going to be able to run
alongside me. And most of the people are way out of shape and not even close to
being attractive. And my ex became a couch potato. And, um, then we could, we
couldn't do things. Wait, there are some really beautiful women in the community
or do you mean the ones that are local to you?
The ones that are local to me. Right. And so therefore the ones that are in my,
and so like, you know, and there's this gal and, um, you know, it's so funny.
She's orbiting me, but she's giving me the time of day, which is kind of funny.
But, um, I'm like, Lord, the Lord's I'm just letting the Lord move. And I'm like,
Lord, if I'm free, I really like this to be somewhere, somewhere, something or
somewhere on a faith journey in that. But I see how she really matches me well.
Right. Like in that, so I'm looking for a kingdom partner, um, who can be on
stage with me and do the things that I'm going to be doing. And I, there's a lot
of people I could marry that want to be, I have people orbiting me constantly.
And I'm like, and they're like, pick me, pick me. And I'm like, you're beautiful.
And they're like, well, what's wrong. It's like, cause we just don't match.
You can't walk with me. You'll get burned up. Right. And like, um, I'm not
allowed to go to evangelical churches for that reason, because we need to be
unequally yoked. So I have a distinct, I'm sorry, what kind of church do you go
to charismatic? Yes, I am.
You think a charismatic church is not an evangelical church.
Okay. So excuse me, I stand corrected, ma'am, but, um, I was just curious.
I'm just curious.
So, I mean, I was evangelical for most of my life, which we did. We had the
father, son and the Holy spirit.
Gotcha. You, you, you want to be, cause like the church I go to the new church
I'm going to with Brian, it is definitely deep in the word, but it also deep in
the Holy spirit. So.
See that, that would be fine, you know? And like, and so it's, it's my faith.
It's I'm like, Lord, I'm really annoyed, but like, I just trust that you're good.
Right.
I mean, you are.
I mean and David Wright said it like you're looking for something really specific and so
You know, you're just gonna have to trust God on it
And I you know people would argue I was looking for something really specific and you guys I'm getting married for the first time at
57 years old so I
Would argue I was really picky. I was really damn picky and I was like, but like you Mike
I was like, I need somebody who can do ministry with me who can handle that
I'm in seminary at 57 years old and who's gonna run alongside that
and
so
So I had a lot of things that were important to me, too
So I would just say keep running your race and keep trusting God and just making sure that you're giving people a chance
I mean, I went to school the prophets. Well, yeah. Well, okay, so
All right, so just so my school the prophets right there's this gal I'm annoyed I'm annoyed like she's just driving me freaking crazy
She's actually hasn't even been kind
She's doing out of her way to be a pain in the butt
But I'm sitting there and there's some gals from the community at school the prophets and so I'm like, let's go
And as I'm walking up to them, I'm having an open vision of her and I'm like lord
this is not freaking fair right like you know, and you know, and so I was like and
And so I couldn't wholeheartedly I took them all out to dinner
like as a group right but um, but I couldn't wholeheartedly
I'm not gonna jump in halfway. Yeah, right. And so so that's why I'm saying it's like it's been this crazy faith journey
And I I actually you guys I prayed for a crazy God story that would go that would glorify him
When this turns out it's gonna be the most insane thing ever
But you know, I look back and I'm like, maybe I shouldn't have made that prayer
But you know like so I just encourage you all like I hope you can take some joy for me today
You know, my circumstance hasn't changed but like Jesus is good, right?
Like he's amazing and even if it all doesn't work out. I'm good. I'm perfectly fine and he's
Right, and I'm really blessed. And like I say, I've had a marriage fund for three years now
Right, you know a ring and marriage fund like it's like, you know
If she says yes, it's we could be married in a month or three, you know, like but whatever so anyways
It's just that's kind of my thing. And that's why I've been reticent to jump on any calls
I know I
Hate saying no to people. Are you saying you mean that the community calls like your co-ed calls? Yeah
That's why you don't that's why you don't see me
You know what you could do you could always come on to get ministered to and just keep your camera off and change your name
On the I will be a me government. Oh, yeah. My name is Antigua, but oh
You know like maybe I can do that, you know
But I mean if you're trying to if you still want to get blessed by the you know, whatever the teaching is
Yeah, and I just in those gals that were at the school of prophets were amazing. We're absolutely phenomenal
Right, but the Lord's like he's kibosh me working like long distance
So, you know should he school of the prophet not local to you Bethel?
Yeah, I think that's four hours. So I
Was like so you're talking like David is two and a half hours. I'm like, that's a lot closer than ready
I wouldn't consider that long distance but because I can do that in a after work, but I mean, you know
Brian was three and a half hours away
It's I would call that long distance because it's not like he can just hop in his car when we before he moved here
It wasn't like he could just say hey, let's go do dinner. Oh
We could be out. That would be cool. So and I'm hoping that this works out and that happens that happens and I
Know the Lord's telling her I just need to let you know, but you know, there's free will and everything
I would not want to be in her shoes though, because
You are an eclectic group of men, I love it. I love you all I shall be the six-fingered man
Killed my father prepared to die
You special guy don't like
Thank you. So like honestly Mike like I wouldn't be surprised if someone in this community was like, you know what for you?
I will go there to be with you because when I said you're a unicorn
it is so rare to see a man like you Mike and
Yeah, so just be encouraged
Don't be discouraged and I would say just don't be afraid because somebody might just jump on a plane and say like I'm ready to
Meet you. I wouldn't be surprised
You can either be praying that the Lord wishes
Releases my kibosh for doing long-distance so that can actually happen or the gal that is actually
Fife was five feet for me Sunday would actually open her heart and jump in and see that. I'm sorry
So there's a woman that caught your eye on Sunday. I asked her out in January
She ghosted me then the Lord called me to her church
like literally and I'm like
And I told him no I said absolutely freaking up and after about three months. He's like, are you gonna still how long?
I'm going to get to be disobedient.
And I was like,
okay, but you tried and she's basically not reciprocated.
Yeah. And you know, but now we're in community and actually, and she,
you know, she's broken a lot of my anxious attachment, which has been amazing.
Um, I had deliverance of that and like, and so, but she's,
she's never experienced me. And like this last week I became me again.
And I was like, Oh, she's in trouble. Cause cause I am back, baby.
Let's go. I'd be like, dude, I can't tell you how exciting it is.
So my ex had cancer 15 years ago. And in that journey,
um,
I broke
things inside me broke that I could, that I couldn't, I mean,
I've done counseling and it hasn't, I couldn't unbreak them.
And then she filed for divorce, which was like, just broke that further.
You know, after, after carrying her for three years, you know,
you know, every, I never missed a chemo appointment.
I never missed a radiation appointment. I was, you know,
and then she just jettisoned me from her life. And so, um,
last week I realized I'm smiling again. And I'm like,
I'm like, I can't remember the last time I smile.
And then all of a sudden my joy came back and I was like, Oh, I'm,
I'm bouncing again. I'm a tigger. Right. You know?
And then one of my good friends who's known me for a long time, she's like,
it's really good to have you back. That's the Mike I remember.
And so it's just, and I just released that you guys,
you may have been going through a really hard time.
And that's been my last 15 years has been hell. I mean,
there's no other way to describe it, but I can tell you he's,
he is faithful and he will restore the things that are broken.
And there's great things coming. And I, and I, and I'm a testimony to that.
And, um, like I said, I feel like I've been veiled for so long.
And now all of a sudden I'm alive again and I'm seeing things clearly and I'm
bouncing.
And I literally picked up people and watch the lady get healed on Sunday from a
brain injury. And like,
all these crazy things are happening just because I'm in the fullness of me.
Right. And like, and because he's flowing through me fully. And so like,
you know, Chris, dude, he's got you. I've been there, bro. I,
I was playing wow. 19 hours a day for a while. You know, like I just,
you know, I just, so like, I can't say that. I don't know, but I don't know,
but I can't say that.
I'll tell you what. So next time I'm with you guys,
which will be in a couple of weeks, you know,
I wrote a book on hope and I know what it's like to feel
hopeless for sure.
But my tidbit that I'll give you on this, when it comes to hopelessness,
um, we,
the earthly version of hope is like a wish or
grit.
It matters how much I feel about and how much energy I put in it.
But the hope that we have in Christ,
we actually don't have to do any mustering up.
We just have to reach for it.
And so we have to like kind of just say that mantra,
like I'm going to hope in God. And how do I get to hope in God?
I get to do it through Christ and I do it by the power of the Holy spirit.
And so try not to find your hope on your own strength,
ask the Holy spirit to deposit fresh manna,
fresh hope every single day. Um,
and I think that's like the most beautiful thing I can tell you about hope is,
um, I actually put, talking about the dark night of the soul,
I put this tattoo on my wrist.
Why can't I turn my wrist correctly whenever I'm on camera? It's ridiculous.
It's the Celtic Trinity sign.
And I put it on my wrist after one of my high school friends committed suicide.
And I said, you know,
what is the difference between me and somebody that chooses to end their life?
And for me, the only difference,
cause I know what the dark night of the soul feels like that Mike was talking
about is I know that there is a God who created me a son who died for me and a
Holy spirit who lives in me. And that is all I need.
That's enough hope for tomorrow. And so Chris,
like and Tim, I don't know everything that's going on in your circumstances,
but I know that the Holy spirit can give you hope that's not in your own
strength.
And so all of us are going to commit to praying that over you guys so that you
feel supernaturally covered and it's not in your strength.
So don't try to look for this grit. Grit is good,
but that's not the kind of hope that the Holy spirit has for you.
And I just really appreciate y'all being so transparent about it because now we
know how to lift you up and pray for you and intercede on behalf.
And remember like the other image.
that's coming to me is, you know, when Moses was too tired to lift his hands anymore, and
Aaron and her lifted those arms for Moses so that he can continue to praise the Lord.
And so that's what we get to do for you guys.
We get to supernaturally or figuratively lift your arms in prayer for you if you are too
tired to do it yourself.
And I love the fact that David Wright offered to go visit.
And so you guys, like, definitely reach out to each other, stay connected.
And I'm super, super grateful for you all.
Does anybody else have a question or want to share?
Because then I definitely do want to do some praying before we go out.
I just want to share for that last gal that I was dating, it kind of just burned me out.
And that was, like, two or three months ago when I hopped on the call in, like, July when
I first started school.
I just kind of felt like not really wanting to spend time with anyone.
And she sent me a text saying it was just like a call to power for herself.
She's like, well, you robbed me of being who I'm called to be by God and blah, blah.
And it was all this, pardon the phrase, I know the call is being recorded, but I have
no other way to call it out bullshit of you put your hands on me in an inappropriate way.
If I had done the same thing, you would have been completely justified to just cut ties.
So it just felt-
Wait, I'm sorry, did she put her hands on you?
Yeah.
Okay.
So, and, you know, me from 10 years ago, wouldn't have cared.
But me nowadays, like, it was just like a righteous indignation.
Yeah.
I just left me pissed off.
Well, I'm sorry.
And so Jackie will, and so I will say this, if that happened a while ago, and Jackie would
say to, you know, from the heart work that whenever we feel offended, there is an opportunity
for an upgrade.
And so I'd ask you to kind of lean into what Holy Spirit is trying to teach you in that,
like if you're still fed up and frustrated, and you're not going to like talk to other
women like, like-
I've tried, but it's half of them are playing those games of, they'll say something, but
then they go dark for, I don't know if I've just attracted all of the, it's been so long,
I can't remember the other term, avoidant attachment disorders or avoidant detachment
starts.
Yeah.
I mean, and if you're coming off anxious, then if you haven't been-
I'm not.
It's just, I noticed that it's kind of like, like they trail off in communication and I
don't hear from them for like a week or so.
Yeah.
If I was the last one to talk.
Are these people you're meeting online?
So very well could be AI.
Oh yeah.
That's it.
It's just a bunch of other just miscommunication where it just feels like, this feels kind
of weird.
I'm not going to keep entertaining this, you know?
And David, I would say kind of do what John's doing.
And I go back, I went back and forth doing different things too.
Like sometimes I put the time and energy into online dating and sometimes I needed to go
completely off and I would only do things in real life.
Like I would do meetup groups, I would do local volunteer groups.
I would go to outdoor sporting events, outdoor fall festivals, you know, kind of thing.
And so I would say, David, the thing I would encourage you, especially cause you are in
school and you have such little disposable time, just make sure that you filter in at
least once a week, something that you like to do that feeds your soul, that's going to
put you in public.
I do.
It's karaoke.
So keep doing that and that will help you.
And my suspicion is you might find somebody right in that kind of a setting.
So it doesn't have to feel like work for you for sure, but thank you for sharing that.
And I'm sorry, you're still struggling with that.
So now we know how to be praying for you too.
So I appreciate you guys saying that.
David, did you want to step in?
Very, very quickly.
Should I change my name now to just David Wright and not have my name, my number?
Yeah, take all that other stuff off.
Okay.
Yep.
Because I'm going to specifically say that on Tuesday night.
I, that if I, if I, somebody saw just my name, it means I'm kind of not on the market.
Um, and so that's why if Mike just keeps Mike, then that's going to be the code for
he's, he's really not, but John, I'm not letting you do that.
Cause I want you to branch out of your situation ship.
I want you to be at least open.
I am.
You're going to be open.
All right.
Um, David, right.
Will you close this out in prayer and kind of cover some of the
stuff that you've heard tonight?
Yeah, I'd love to father.
God, I thank you for, uh, the two new men that came tonight, God, or that
they've come back and, uh, thank you Lord.
Or father, I thank you for every man in this chat and Renee and her Brian and
God, we just pray a special blessing over them, father.
We pray for our spirit mates, Lord.
We pray for whoever she is and her family, where she is right now.
We thank you for her.
We thank you that you have someone for us.
I thank you for all these men.
I just thank you for the love that you poured out on us, father.
And so Lord, I just pray be with Renee and her studies.
We thank you that she's taken time out of her busy schedule to spend time with the
man and we thank you that she is a great advocate for us, God.
And I just pray you bless her and pray you bless everybody.
I pray specifically for Chris, that he would feel encouragement today, God.
That he would just be encouraged in Lord when he's playing games, that he would
just feel the love of the spirit when he's playing the video games, Lord.
And when he just feel your love and your joy.
And I pray for David and his studies and I just pray for everybody on this call, Lord
Mike, Tim, John, and we pray all these things in your name, amen.
Amen.
You guys, I'm so glad I got to see you tonight and in two weeks, I'm
going to talk about hope.
Oh, so is it Tuesday next Tuesday or Tuesday?
Tuesday is the single spotlight thing.
And then the next time I'm on deck, I don't know when I'm on deck.
So we'll find out.
It's when John's getting hooked up, bro.
He's just going to be like,
Oh, and fishing and he's cut and he's coming home and he's going to land it, baby.
And there's no situation.
I'm just going to, yeah.
Is that, is that like, like tomorrow?
No, Tuesday, like next week.
Oh my God.
The next week.
Okay.
The seventh.
Okay.
That's that's good.
All right.
I was thinking it's tomorrow.
So yeah.
Okay.
All right.
See you guys.
All right.