Now we're recording, the prayer did not get recorded, but we are recording now.
And so yes, we're just going to continue to pray that more ladies come on.
I'm hoping that maybe there was just this overabundance of maybe there was a lot of
my phase two girls celebrating the five-year anniversary in Austin.
I got to meet so many of the ladies, and if I got to meet you, it was awesome to meet
you.
I know there was a couple ladies, I think, from phase two that I got to see.
It was awesome.
I probably do not look recognizable.
I am embarrassed to admit this, I still have not showered since Saturday, y'all.
Like my goal was like to shower as soon as I dropped my kids off today, and I didn't.
I got so sidetracked, like my dad had a crisis, and I'm like, okay, well, these poor ladies
are going to have to see me like not shower today, so apologies.
But I drove home to Dallas-Fort Worth after the party, Sunday night, I didn't leave Austin
till like after midnight, and so I literally got home at like 3.30 in the morning, and
I had to drink coffee like before driving.
And so like I literally could not go to bed until like five in the morning, and then like
I had to go drive to my son's elementary school because I didn't have lunch packed for him
because he stayed with one of his baseball coaches, and so I was like, okay, he's not
with family, I'm not going to make them make a lunch.
So I'm like, I'll just take him Chick-fil-A, and so I had to like get up and do that, and
then I got sucked into, you know, making like 1000 copies for the teacher.
So yeah, I never got to shower in yesterday, and then I crashed when I got home from baseball
practice and youth group.
So my apologies, anyway, so it was a really awesome, awesome celebration.
So ladies, like, if you weren't able to be there, don't worry, because we were praying
for all of you.
I got to spend some time with the ladies that were there for the retreat, got to pray over
a lot, a lot of the ladies at the retreat, and as well as at the party.
You know, big things are happening in this community, girls, like, I want you to take
hold of that, like, get ready.
Like how many of you got to listen to Jackie's Supernatural Saturday?
Okay, Saoirse, Leah, Mika, okay, Ashley, you did as well, perfect, Ashley, okay, Stephanie,
I don't know if you're able to raise your hand or Myra, okay, definitely, okay, Ashley,
okay, gotcha.
I love it.
Yes.
Thank you, Saoirse.
Like, I love that.
I love that.
I actually said the same thing to one of the baseball moms last night, because she had
to have her kid wear, like, the smelly uniform for pictures.
We had, like, our kids' pictures, baseball pictures last night, and they, like, they
made them practice and then took pictures afterwards.
I'm like, like, that's weird.
Anyway, but I said, well, at least we can't smell them from their pictures, so I love
that you said that.
Yes, so, yes, you can't smell me, y'all, I just don't look as pretty, but it's fine.
So, yes, so just listen to Supernatural Saturday.
If you haven't, the siege is over, ladies.
I'm telling you, like, it, like, things are about to move, so start taking hold of that.
Y'all, I've been in this program for those ladies that, you know, maybe you're brand
new to Phase 2.
I'm Carla Johnson.
I am one of your coaches here in Phase 2, so maybe you're watching the replay.
I am a success story from this group, from this community.
I came to Jackie literally five years ago, so this weekend was so special to me because
that is, changed my life, literally.
Five years ago changed my life, and ladies, this community will change your life, too.
I believe that.
So, open your hands up, be ready to receive that this community will change your life,
okay?
And not just right now in this moment, but when your spirit mate comes, ladies, it will
continue to keep changing your life.
Y'all, I've been married now a little over two years.
This community is still changing my life.
Things that I was prophetically, like, spoken over five years ago in this community, things
that God was doing and showing me in this community five years ago.
is coming full circle in my marriage and it's happening in my marriage now.
Like Jackie says, it doesn't have to be easy,
it just has to be worth it.
Ladies, I'm telling you,
my single season in this community,
I mean, I started in 2020.
I didn't meet my husband until I was over two years in,
and then we were dating and engaged.
I really was about three years into this community
before I was officially married.
I didn't get married until 2023.
Yeah, I had some hard.
Guess what? I'm having some hard in marriage too and blending a family.
It's not easy, but it's worth it.
This community, God will use,
and I shared this with the ladies on the retreat.
It really will impact your life and God is so intricately involved and woven into
your love story so much so that he spares no detail in that love story.
Right when you think, okay,
my love story is written and you're married,
he uses bits and pieces of that love story to weave into your marriage,
in your kids' lives, and all that stuff.
I mean, it is incredible.
Like I said, it's not easy.
Heartwork still happens.
Any of you that are watching that are brand new,
brand new to phase two,
you just got out of heartwork,
don't worry, heartwork doesn't stop.
I'm one of your coaches.
Me and Ebony, I'm definitely the coach that will definitely heartwork you still.
If you're like, I miss heartwork, don't worry.
Just know that Carla will heartwork you.
Ebony does too. But I always tell Ebony,
don't worry girl, sometimes they can get mad at me,
because sometimes people don't like to be heartworked.
I get it. Some people do, some people don't.
Some people don't like to be heartworked through their dating scenarios.
Don't worry. But just remember what Jackie says.
Offense is usually a hard thing.
If I offend you, it's just a hard thing.
I'll take no offense if you're offended to me.
Because just know it always comes from love,
and it always is coming from a place of,
I probably have been there too,
and it's probably because I have probably done it.
So I am right there with you.
So just know that there's never any judgment ever.
So yeah, if you're coming in from phase one,
you're like, I miss heartwork, don't worry.
Heartwork still happens here.
Heartwork will happen in your relationships,
and heartwork will happen in your marriages,
and heartwork happens with your kids, and your parents,
and every which ways, and your in-laws.
Heartwork will happen with your in-laws too, ladies.
Some of you ladies who've been married before will know that.
Yeah, Saoirse, she's like, yes.
Heartwork happens with your in-laws.
Yes, it does.
Okay, so yes, definitely.
That's just, again, just take hold of it, ladies,
and just really embrace it.
Like I said, big things are happening.
Even Jackie was sharing with us this weekend.
Soon, soon, soon, soon.
Also, just know we're not, like Jackie's in the works of,
you know, when you find your spirit mate,
we're not trying to leave you, okay?
So we're working at doing like a spirit mate-like group too,
so that when you're married for like newly married people,
I mean, I'm definitely pushing that with her.
Like she's usually sometimes having to take phone calls
from me like, okay, Jackie, we have a situation, help me.
So that is in the works too.
So we're not like, we're with you.
Like we're a community, we are a family, all right?
So show up, know that we're here for you, okay?
Come into the app, let us know what you're going through.
What's God highlighting to you?
What's your dating experience like?
What are you struggling with?
What are you having success with?
What is working?
What's not working?
Where are you stuck?
Where did you get unstuck?
What content are you watching?
What was an aha for you?
What is like, no, I don't like that, that offended me.
Y'all come and share with me and Ebony, what offended you?
Well,
Work through it, and don't think,
and don't be afraid if something offends you.
I will be the first to tell you there's a lot of things
that Jackie said in the beginning that offended me.
A lot.
And I know that there's oftentimes things
that I'm gonna tell you ladies,
and some of y'all are gonna be offended with me,
and that's fine, okay?
I take no offense to it, okay?
And it's okay for you to be like,
I don't like that you said that to me.
You will not hurt my feelings, okay?
And I will not judge you for it.
I will love you through it, and we will work it through.
And I will be the first one to say, you know what?
Wow, maybe I didn't get it right.
And if I was wrong, I'll let you know that.
Y'all, I'm human.
I'm not Jesus, okay?
So if I get something wrong,
I wanna be able to make it right with y'all as well, okay?
So don't ever hesitate to tell me,
Carla, that didn't sit well with me.
And we'll work it through, 100%, okay?
So all that being said, do I have any,
I don't think I have any newbies with me right now, do I?
I think I recognize everybody.
I got three hands up for questions.
That's good.
So, Jackie's word that she released,
Siege is over, super powerful.
So definitely check that out.
Okay, Myra, you are one of those that miss the heart work.
I got you, girl.
I got you, all right?
So any of your heart work stuff, come to me, all right?
I'm gonna be there.
If you're not dating right now,
but you've got stuff surfacing that's heart work,
come and ask the heart work questions.
And for you ladies that are dating,
that are like, oh, I like dating now.
Don't worry, I'll pull some heart work
out of that dating stuff for you.
Don't worry.
Some of you are like, oh, yay, I get to date the boys now.
And then I'll be like, no, no, no, wait.
I got a heart work thing for you.
All right, so, okay.
Yes, I got more questions, good, good, good.
I don't really have a whole lot of housekeeping.
I'm curious.
Did Jackie go live on any of her social media
while we were at the party?
Did anybody see?
I don't know.
I thought she did.
I just don't know.
I don't know if anybody got to check it out or not.
Okay, so some, okay.
There was something Jackie said on the podcast
that was really about how people on the apps
are the dismissive and avoidance.
Wow, yes.
And that's where you are and where I'm looking.
So what I do, oh, that's a really good question, Stephanie.
That is such a good question.
I'm needing heart work while I date.
Yes.
Girl, that's why we got you here, all right?
100%, absolutely.
So yeah, I didn't hear that podcast,
but I've heard a little bit about it.
And so I'm just gonna start that with you.
Was that part of your question
or do you still have another question, Stephanie?
That wasn't part of my question,
but when you mentioned that Jackie has said some stuff
that you found offensive or like,
I just chimed in with that comment
because I had to rewatch it a couple of times
to like, what is she really trying to say here?
Like, let me see the silver lining in there.
But I was like, then why push us to get on apps
and to put ourselves out there if what you're saying
is that there's nothing but dismissive
and avoidance on there?
Like that was, you know.
I love it.
Okay, so when I came in five years ago,
you wanna know what she used to say?
And I don't know if she said this on the podcast.
I need to go back.
Which podcast was it?
It was like a, it was, I can't remember,
but I think it's a man and a woman.
And it was actually for like 50 plus like singles.
Yes.
But she came up, I follow her on social media.
So it came up on her page and it was on her blog.
So I went, cause I just caught that like little snippet.
And I was like, no, I need to listen to the whole thing.
I'm not over 50, but I need to listen to the whole thing
because I wanna.
know what she means? Okay, yes, you definitely need to hear what
she probably because I know Jackie, yeah, you definitely
want to hear the whole thing. And I'll, I'm gonna ask you in a
minute, like, what did you pull from that? But before I ask you
that, I have to tell you what she used to call it. The apps.
When I first joined, she used to call it swimming with the sharks.
I'm like, Jackie, I don't want to go swimming with sharks. Like
absolutely not for me. Like, why? Why would I want to do
that? So I get you like, when you say that, it's like, yeah,
well, why you're like, why? Why do Ebony and Carla constantly
push us to go on these dating apps? Because I get it. Like,
you know, we don't enjoy these dating apps. I didn't. So I
know when I'm sitting here, like, okay, ladies, let's get on
the dating apps. And I'm like, trying to be as like, happy and
cheerleading as I possibly can. And you're all like, you're, I
know, I'm offending you.
You're feeding me to the shark. So you're, you're, you're
throwing me in there.
Yeah, you're like, Carla, like, can I just put my foot up where
the sun don't shine? Because? Yeah, Carla, it's so easy for
you to say because you're married. I know y'all are
thinking that I get it. Because I was thinking that, too. Like,
yeah, Jack, you're married to David and David is wonderful.
And you know, you met your husband next door. You didn't
have to meet him on an app. So I get it. Like, I totally get it.
So yeah, like, like, why are we doing this if the dismissive and
avoidance are out there? So I'm curious after listening to her.
What message did you really? Why do you think she was sharing
that? Like, what was her overall message? Did you feel?
Um, I really was just like, almost an offhand comment in the
general thing that she was that she was talking about. And even
though I went back and like, tried to listen to it again, like
to try to I didn't really come to a real conclusion. Okay, the
only thing that I settled with was, I know she doesn't mean
that there are just dismissive and avoidance on there, but that
they're, they are more likely on there, because it's easier to be
dismissive and avoidant on an application. Right. But in the
moment, my initial was like, then why are you telling me to
go there? Because, you know, I felt a little bit also, because
it's just, I am I am out there. I'm going out with, you know,
I'm going out with friends, and I'm doing new things. And I'm
finding hobbies, and I'm doing all the things. But the reality
is that just socially where we are, and especially at least for
my age group, it's like people don't talk to each other
anymore. Like people are not, you know, I could go and be out
somewhere nice. And a guy might think that, you know, I, he
might be interested or attracted, but that doesn't mean
he's gonna, it's just not the way it really works. We're all
on these. Exactly. We're all on these now. I mean, like, I mean,
I'm telling you, I mean, because you're in New York. Yeah. I
mean, I'm sure everyone's like this. Walking everywhere on the
subway. You're, you're surrounded by hundreds of
people every day, but nobody's like really interacting. You're
sitting in a coffee shop and everybody's this. Exactly. I
mean, when I'm 42. So in my 20s, like, yeah, we, we had cell
phones and stuff, but we didn't have, we didn't have these
iPhones. Even early, early in my dating life, it wasn't like
that. But now it is. So you go to a coffee shop and you were
watching people, you were talking to people, you know, and
so it is, it's this stepping out of your comfort zone. And so I
do encourage you ladies, like when you are out, like you
don't just have to communicate with people when you're on apps.
When you go out, interrupt people when they're on their
phones. Do it. I mean, I got to the point, like I used to be
very, very shy, which this is interesting. While we were on
retreat, Jackie was talking about like, who, who identifies
and says they're shy? Is there anybody here that would say I'm
shy? Anybody? Yeah. I know some people are not on camera. If you
can get on camera, that'd be awesome. I know some people have
their hand raised. So I don't know. I know you have a
question. Okay, Meyer, you're saying you're shy. Okay, I'm
gonna tell you all what Jackie said. Okay. You want to know
what she said? Shy is a lie. Shy is a lie. God did not create us
to be shy. He created us for community. He created us for
relationship. Okay. Now will it take you some time to maybe warm up to people? Yeah. I mean,
some of us are sitting there telling our whole life story to these strangers. We don't want that.
Okay. But you do need to know, like, what do you, what do you hold and not share with people? Like
you have to have boundaries. Okay. You don't want to share everything, but
you don't have to be like, okay, I can't even just say hello to a person,
say hello to people. And if they don't respond to you, that's them. So get into this mode. Like
if you identify that I'm shy, once you just start repeating, I'm just, I'm just literally
repeating what Jackie said, which I believe Holy spirit spoke through her.
Shy is a lie. So if you are someone, if you're watching on replay that believes that they're
shy, you're going to start saying, no, shy is a lie. I am not shy. You're going to start coming
out of that. Okay. All right. I'm starting to go off on like tangents here. So I'm gonna try to
get back into center here and kind of go back to, well, since I'm already on here, can I,
can I share what I want to go back to this, like dismissive and avoidance that are on the apps.
Okay. Cause again, yes, there are people on these apps that are like that. Okay. Ladies,
it doesn't matter if it's a Christian dating site or a non-Christian dating site. Okay. Cause I see
this often in lust or accelerator and phase two, everybody wants to know, I want to know
which Christian app should I join ladies? It doesn't matter if it's a Christian app or
non-Christian app. I'm going to tell you that right now. There's unhealthy on all of them.
There's Christians and non-Christians on all of them. There are non-Christians on Christian apps
and there's Christians on non-Christian apps. Okay. The biggest key and the biggest takeaway
and the foundation of doing this successfully is heartwork.
That's why Jackie talks about that on these podcasts, because what is needed the most
in this dating world is heartwork. God wants us married, but he wants us healed in him truly.
That's why we're already, I mean, we already are healed. He wants us to, he wants us to accept
that. Like it's already done. Finished work of the cross is there, but how many of us ever
actually truly live in that and accept that and take that on? We're all still sitting here
in our counterfeit and these false identities and sitting here in our lives and our past
traumas and living in these wounds. Okay. We're human. I still do that. I still have
that. I have to do my healing comes in layers y'all. And so that's, that's why she brings that
up because here's the thing. Yes, you're going to deal with some dismissive and avoidance,
but the more you lean into this heartwork and you work on yourself and your healing,
and you allow God to come highlight those areas that you need to work on, that he is trying to
to you, you're going to be able to distinguish those dismissive and avoidance
or those anxious attachers. You're going to recognize it and you're going to be able to
work through that. Y'all, I was, when I took the attachment style quiz, the small one,
the one that we get with in the resource thing, I, when I take it, it says I'm anxious attacher.
Now, when I go to my therapist, she has like the clinical one. That one, when I took several,
if you're going to talk at the beginning of the year, I was like fearful avoidant,
which is like the combination of anxious and avoidant. Okay. So my husband is probably more
on the secure side. So guess what? It doesn't mean you have to be
secure to be in a marriage because then that would have meant that I needed to be secure
before my husband would have met and married me. Y'all, I'm a work in progress.
And yes, my husband can show up very secure, but guess what I'm learning?
He also has certain areas in his life where he won't admit it.
Oh, if you knew I was telling y'all this, you'd probably like, what?
But he knows what my job entails. So he's just, I'm like, sorry, babe, you're, you're along for
the ride. Our marriage, our love story is part of, it's part of my job. It's part of our testimony.
It's part of kingdom. So buckle up buttercup. Um, he's got avoidant tendencies, y'all.
Okay. So I say that is because you are going to find some of those people on these apps,
but it doesn't mean that your spirit mate's not going to have some of those flags.
It's going to be how you respond to them and how they respond to you. And this is
all a work in progress. Okay. Cause marriage is a work in progress. Y'all iron sharpens iron.
I'm telling you marriage is God's maturity plan for mankind. You'll hear Jackie say that a lot.
And I mean, I'm again, I'm no expert on marriage cause I'm only like two years in
I will tell you just in my two years, I will tell you, she ain't lying.
Marriage will mature you. So this is why this, this certain part of your life right now, this
single like stage of your life and being in this community, it really is a preparation period.
We are helping you all get ready for that marriage because it is coming. You're not here
by circumstance. You're here by divine appointment and by purpose because God wants you married.
And there is an anointing and a super natural breakthrough on this community. We have over
1600 marriages and engagements and like matches. And then some, I think like we probably have way
more than that. Okay. Because there's something super natural, there's a supernatural grace on
this and we're entering five years, which is the number of grace. Okay. So it like, there is it,
we're carrying that. Okay. So this is that preparation period. So yes, we're going to
put you on those apps because some of you are going to find your husbands on apps.
You're going to find them in the weirdest ways. And let me tell you in every one of these love
stories. Okay. Obviously I have my own love story. I've seen many of my friends, they've
stepped into their love story and their marriages. I got to, okay. Y'all I've worked with Renee. I
don't know. Y'all I've seen many of the lives, right. Or not the lives, the coaching
trainings, right. For phase two, Renee does a couple of them towards the end. She and I used
to coach in the very beginning when I was starting to coach. Okay. So this is like two years ago when
I started coaching, she was the other coach. Ebony didn't come in until later. I never met
her in person. I finally got to meet her this weekend and she just got married like 12 days ago.
No, 11 days ago, 10 days ago. I don't even remember literally like over like last, not this past week
and the weekend before that. Okay. I've watched her go through a series of guys and she's,
there was a couple that, you know, made it to send this with her,
but they weren't her spirit mate. You know, she had the preparation period and
like it didn't show up the way that she thought it was going to show up, but it showed up way better.
So I say that because it's not going to come in the package or the way that you think it's
going to come. So yeah, I know we're like resistant to this. Like, I don't want to online date.
I get it. Some of you, you're right. You're not going to meet your husband on online dating,
but there's a reason that maybe you need to go online and maybe practice, or there's something
that God wants to reveal to you. That's going to prepare you for when he does have your husband
for you. I didn't meet my husband on a dating app, but I did meet him online.
It was actually through this community. And that's another thing, ladies. I want you all to start,
if you're going online,
Look out for your sisters.
Look at it as like, okay,
this guy, I'll go out with him,
maybe he's not for me, but maybe I can scope him
out for one of the other girls that I'm friends with in this community.
You're like, okay, I don't think I'm interested in him,
but maybe you'd be like,
I'm not interested in him,
but he looks like a cool guy,
I'll go get to know him,
and maybe he'll be highlighted for one of my friends.
Jackie released that over this weekend,
community-based matchmaking.
That was something that she really wanted to have
take off in this community when we first started.
That happened in my story.
I'm one of the very few I feel like that's happened to.
It's happened to a handful of us, but not everybody.
But one of my sisters in this community was looking out on
a Facebook group,
like a single's Facebook group,
and she saw my husband's profile.
She was already dating a guy.
But she saw it, she screenshot all his stuff,
and I was like, here, what do you think?
Many of you have heard this, I feel like I've shared this the last several weeks.
For whatever reason, I think God's just highlighting it for whatever reason,
because I was even sharing it this week with a lot of the ladies.
It was different, but it was still in a supernatural way.
And so it's all about being open to what God wants to do in your love story.
So yes, there are going to be those dismissive avoidance,
100%, but once you've worked through some heart work,
you're going to respond to those dismissive avoidance,
anxious attachers way differently than you did before,
because you're no longer operating in your counterfeit identity.
You're going to be operating in your authentic God-given identity.
And that's what we do here.
That's why I want you ladies coming,
share with me your dates and share with me what God is revealing to you.
What are you offended by?
Let's go there.
You know, what's triggering that from the past?
Let's heal some of those areas so that as you continue to date,
you're going to start approaching things differently.
Y'all, I had to go through this program for two years.
I'm stubborn, y'all.
I'm stubborn and I'm a control freak.
I had to admit that to Jackie this weekend and she looked at me and she's like,
Carla, anybody that knows you, knows you're a control freak.
Like Jackie, I'm like, thanks Jackie.
Thanks for ripping the bandaid off.
You know, I love you, Jackie.
And she knows I love her and I know she loves me.
And, you know, obviously we've had five years together and she's had to like
bend me several times and I'm sure I've probably like rubbed her the wrong way
at times because I've been a brat or something.
Let me tell you, like that happens.
But yes.
So, yeah, I know I've talked a lot here, but I think that was a really good
question and for whatever reason, I really do think y'all need to probably
hear that and whoever in replay probably needs to hear that.
I hope that releases something over all of you that are
listening in replay as well.
Um, so yeah, heartwork is key.
And just again, release the pen and allow God to write it.
I'm having to release the pen right now in what I thought my blended
family needed to look like, because I need to control that too.
I got to help my, I got to help my, my children heal.
You know, my, my, my bonus children, their mother passed away.
There's a lot of hurt and trauma there.
There's a lot of behaviors there that I'm thinking I got to come in here and fix.
These are not healthy behaviors.
I got to come in here and I got to fix it.
And y'all, I can't, I'm not Jesus.
I'm not God.
Now, can God use me to play a role in their healing?
Absolutely.
That's why I believe God brought my husband and I together, not just for
me and my husband and our healing, but for our kids and their kids.
And then even our families.
So let that be released over all of you.
Okay.
Being open and let that also encourage you that it is okay to be in the tough
space, that you are here in this community to share it with us.
And we are right here with you to walk.
I'll get through with you.
Sound good.
All right, Stephanie.
Shoot me your question, and then I'm going to go backwards.
I'm going to go Mika, Leah, Ashley, and Lori.
Lori, I just love always saving you for last
because yours is always just like,
you always just were my spirit.
But if you have to go and you can't wait till last,
just let me know, and then I won't put you there, OK?
I don't ever want you to say, OK, you can't stay on.
OK, so Stephanie, Lori, Mika, Leah, Ashley, how about that?
Oh wait, yeah, you have a date this afternoon.
Yeah, we definitely need to get you going so you can start
like glamming yourself up, girl.
OK, Stephanie, your question.
I just wanted to share that I got my seventh date.
So yeah, I know if you've been keeping up with myself,
I was feeling super discouraged.
I was matching with a bunch of people
who were kind of far away.
And so I had a couple of three of those seven dates
were video dates.
But one of those led to in-person dates with a guy,
which I went on three in-person dates with.
And the last one was terrible.
And that's where I, thank you, that's
where I had the question about how many dates when you're not
feeling very attracted, because I just kind of had a feeling.
I will say that what I feel that the Lord taught me
in that was to trust my gut.
I feel that part of my heart work was in, I had a,
I believe the lie that it was my fault that I've
been single for so long.
Like it's something that, you know,
that is the lies that I've heard.
Well, you're too picky, or you're too this,
or you haven't done that, or you haven't done.
Like I was taking some of that accountability,
but also like just feeling guilt about those things.
And so it drove me to not really to question my instincts.
Yeah.
And so I think that even though the date went really well,
and I felt really relaxed because I could be myself,
there was something that I was like, I'm not sure.
And then I went on two other dates.
And by the third one, it was like, oh, no,
it just fell apart, which the Lord did,
which is great because it just, it needed to go.
And then I was really just feeling like, man,
I need a break.
I'm emotionally spent.
This requires a lot of energy, you know,
to just get to know people and start conversation.
And I had some prayer time.
And I was just like, you know what?
I'm going to give it one more round.
Let's swipe a little longer, and let's see how that goes.
And I did.
So I matched with someone, and he was very quick
to ask for a date right away.
And so we did.
We went on our first date on Sunday,
which was my seventh date, which I didn't think
I was going to make by the end of October.
I'm like, forget it.
I'm not going to make this challenge.
It's not going to happen because this is not going well.
So that's a win.
I have the seventh date.
I also have a second date with this guy on Saturday.
And funnily enough, we were talking,
and when I asked him, like, where he went to church,
turns out that we were both attending and serving
at a church when I came to Jesus.
I don't know.
It must have been maybe 12 or 13 years ago.
We were in, like, the same, and we never crossed paths.
Like, never.
No.
So we have, like, people in common that we know.
And yeah, so I guess it's the first time
that I feel that it's really tangible
because even though I met him online,
it's like, you're a real person.
Yeah, like, you're a real person.
This feels like, you know, like, flesh and bone.
Like, you're not just a random stranger.
He's still a stranger, and I'm still getting to know him.
But he feels more tangible than I felt in the past.
What platform did you find him on?
Facebook dating, actually.
So girls, I'm telling you right now.
It's been my favorite one, to be honest.
I'm telling you.
Facebook dating.
I mean, you got to weed through a lot of stuff.
You got to weed through a lot, but I'm telling you,
there was, like, there's just, I just always, like,
I did Facebook dating.
Not that I found my husband on Facebook dating.
Now, he was on Facebook.
He was in a Facebook singles Christian group.
Now, I wasn't in the group.
All, like, a handful of the girls from, you know,
last year's single were.
And, you know, but Facebook is, like, where it's at.
I don't know.
Bethany and Matt were just nice.
Three out of the four guys that I've had dates with
have been from Facebook dating.
Renee liked Facebook.
I think in the online video,
I think that's the one she was saying,
like, that's the one she had the most success with.
I'm telling you.
Facebook is.
So I would say.
We're still gonna deal with these scammers.
I mean, everywhere.
Like.
Totally.
Oh, Lori too.
She met the guy on Facebook.
Yeah.
I'm telling you.
So any of you ladies that are listening and replay are on right now that are always asking
like what, what apps, what apps, what apps, and it's so easy.
Cause it's like, if you already have a Facebook, all you do is kind of start that one and exactly,
I'm telling you.
I mean, and it's free.
And if you're already scrolling on Facebook, I mean, I know, again, maybe that's, maybe
that's just our age bracket.
Like, I don't feel like the younger 20 somethings maybe are always on Facebook.
Maybe they're more Instagram.
Y'all, I have an Instagram, but I'm never on it because I'm like the Facebook generation.
Facebook came when I was like starting college.
Okay.
So like Facebook is my jam.
Like I actually, my space was probably more my jam and then Facebook happened.
Right.
But like Facebook, I'm like, Hey, I'm all for it.
I'm on Facebook more than I am on Instagram.
So, um, but yeah, and I, it's, I also like, I mean, you have to weed through a lot, but
because it's Facebook, I feel like there's so many people on there.
So I have like lots of likes, you know, right now they have, like, wow, look how many people
like profile ladies.
It's free.
So you're not really having to spend a lot of money if you're already on Facebook again,
like you can literally just like say, okay, I'm only gonna spend 20 minutes on the Facebook
dating part.
You, and again, it's about creating your own boundaries with it.
I mean, I was, you know, I was a single mom.
I wasn't trying to pay for any of those apps.
I was over it because I did them before, before I had my son and then I was a single mom and
I'm like, I'm not trying to pay for this.
I don't get child support.
I'm not, I don't have money.
Like I got to raise a kid.
So I'm not trying to pay for this.
Especially if like some of these guys aren't paying for these dates, like you always come
prepared to pay.
I mean, you do, you come to prepare for pay, but Jackie had to teach me to not offer to
pay, let the guy offer, but not to always assume that he was and to not be offended
if he didn't.
That's another one.
Like ladies get offended if they don't offer to pay and I'm like, well, I had to learn
to not be offended by it, but I appreciated when they did offer like that was attractive
to me.
And my husband most certainly is that kind of man.
Like he'll hear, you know, stories like that guy made that girl pay.
She needs to drop them.
I'm like, honey, stop.
But just know sometimes you'll hear how these men are on these dates.
And let me tell you, like he gets angry for y'all.
So when these men show up like that, he's like, no, men do not need to be treating women
that way.
So I will sometimes get the ear and I get the men's perspective too, because sometimes
I will be like, is this really how men, and he'll be like, absolutely not.
And so that should tell you that there are men out there that are not like that.
Okay.
Not all men are like that.
Um, so yes, men not offering to pay will be a trigger.
Absolutely.
But I will tell you, like, part of that is as well is because there are a lot of women
out there that refuse to have a man take care of them because they have their stuff.
And so men have been like beaten down for trying to be these providers.
And naturally that's what God's created them to be.
Not always necessarily like a financial provider, but a spiritual provider, like an emotional
provider.
I mean, why do you think women are more emotional than men?
Men are just stronger because, and not as emotional because women need men to lean on
more for emotional support because y'all, us women, especially with all of our hormones,
you know, never know when we're going to explode.
Sometimes we need to lean on a man because he's not going to have the meltdown.
I mean, that's how I am.
Like sometimes I just have the meltdowns.
I just need my husband to be like, honey, let me just go take care of this for you.
So I mean, but when you have these strong women that are like constantly like up against
these men that they can't be masculine, they are just afraid of offending a woman and being
attacked.
So they're afraid to offer.
And then sometimes they're just broke and they're like little mama's boys and they just
want a mama.
Like then, yeah, we won't get those boys to the curb, like for sure.
Okay.
But I'm just saying like, we have to dig a little deeper.
We got to get to know them and really ask the Lord to reveal things.
things to us, that will help us give a better understanding.
Again, that all comes from heartwork and doing our stuff.
And again, being centered on the Lord.
And like, that's what I like what Stephanie said,
like she sat with that one guy, like, okay,
what do you want me to learn from this guy?
I went on three dates with this guy and then,
and then God just kind of let it fall apart for her.
And then she learned that, okay,
I was struggling with this because I had to learn that
it's not my fault.
It's not my fault.
I can trust my instincts.
She didn't cut and run after the first, like,
I'm not attracted to this guy, but she gave it three dates.
And then when those three dates, God revealed to her,
like, it's a lie that it's your fault.
And I'm going to show you, this isn't your guy.
And you can trust me with that.
Same thing happened to me.
I went on three dates with this guy,
I had a fourth date with him,
and there's something just wasn't right.
He was super intentional, super, like,
just a really nice guy,
but there was something that just didn't fit.
He was, he was attractive,
but I was not attracted to him physically,
but he was a physically attractive guy.
And then just, there was something about him
that I wasn't attracted to.
And then my husband, I wasn't physically attracted to,
but there was this like spiritual, emotional,
like just this part about him, his heart,
I just was like, oh my goodness,
that just grew me to this physical attraction to my husband.
But that intimacy grew over time.
It wasn't like this, like, ooh,
like can't keep my hands off of him kind of thing.
Like, y'all, we don't want to have,
I mean, yeah, we want that.
Like, trust me, you want that in your husband
and you'll get that, I promise.
But we don't want that in those like first,
like couple of dates, okay?
You don't want that.
Like, I want my hands all over you.
Like, that's a red flag, ladies.
If you're like getting all of that,
like that's a warning sign for you, okay?
And for them, if they're like, hey babe,
like I need to be physical.
I need this, that's how I show love.
Like, I'm a physical touch person.
No, no.
Like, no, there's boundaries, okay?
All right, I know I keep talking and talking,
but I feel like these are all,
hopefully these, I hope y'all are learning something.
I hope this is speaking to you.
And I will wait for all of you
because I know y'all are waiting patiently.
So Lori, I'm going to go to you
because I know you got the date.
And then I'm going to go Mika, Leah, and Ashley.
And then if we have more, we'll see what we can fit in, okay?
Lori, what's your update?
You got a date this afternoon?
We got some breakthrough.
I love it.
Okay, so before I, I'm going to preface this with,
I'm not saying that he's the one.
I'm just noticing things.
And then also we'll say that like,
as much as I want to like,
as much as like when I hear like prophetic words,
sometimes like the playful stuff,
there's something in my heart that's like,
oh brother, yeah, right.
And that's like, so unbelief.
Well, I just went to the bathroom at church
and I found a dime.
And I just like immediately thought of
the turn on the dime prophecy.
Yes.
And so again, I'm, you know,
it was like it awakened something in my heart
that was like, it wasn't,
I mean, I don't know if I see money often or not,
like on the ground, but anyway.
So then I went on Facebook dating.
I have an account on there,
but I honestly, I put it on taking a break most of the time
because it's unedited.
I don't, it's very unedited.
I feel like the page sites are,
my experience has been more edited.
Anyway, met this guy, Jesse, met him last,
like so we connected on Monday evening,
like just matched.
Yeah.
And then we started, I think he sent me something
and then I don't remember the exact thing,
but we like messaged for a long time yesterday
for like a couple hours.
Okay.
And he said, you know, just back and forth,
I was cleaning and then,
and I wouldn't normally like get back to somebody right away,
but it just felt lighthearted and easy.
And so it was fun.
And then he's like, would you like my number
so we can chat sometime?
So, he gave me his number and then he's like, I said, yeah, that sounds good, would love
to chat or a video call sometime.
And he said, what are you doing tonight?
So, we had a video chat last night.
So, this is like the day after I got the dime, then match the next day, a video chat last
night and he's like, I'm going to be up in your area tomorrow.
He's like, would you like to meet for an early dinner?
So, this is like, I need to drive an hour south of here because he's, yeah, actually
suddenly the suddenly so, I mean, like to be fair, ladies, like all of a sudden, like
after I've been waiting for like 15 years.
Laurie, do you know that like that word was like over this movement when Jackie first
started the movement?
That's sudden.
Suddenly, the accelerated.
Yeah.
So, yeah, I mean, we've talked just about like high level things, his faith is really
important to him.
He shared what church he's going to, but he's super humble.
I feel like just fun, lighthearted, laughs a lot.
He's an architect, so he's, he's actually down in Indiana because he's, has a mom that's
aging and.
I'm from Indiana.
So, he's a good, he's a good guy.
I mean, all people.
Yeah.
But he's also lived in California for a little bit, so we have that in common.
Sarah Sheldon, don't you?
Indiana does have, does seem to have really grounded.
Christian.
Sarah Sheldon, did you get, did you, did someone hurt you from Indiana?
No.
Okay.
Cause I'm going to say, then they're not from Indiana.
We're going to just dispose of them right now.
I see her shaking her head like, yeah, no.
Yeah.
So, and I mean, it's just like, I mean, we talked to, you know, brushed on faith a little
bit.
I just wanted to know if it was a value for him and he says, oh, it's super important
to me.
And but we just both love like design.
He's an architect and he's done some incredible projects like, and so just have the interest
of talking, you know, just common interests of talking about design and liking the same
type of design.
And then he's, he's also loves to cook and he makes sourdoughed homemade and just like
all these things that are like literally like, yeah, just so many, cause I love to talk about
creative ideas.
Have so much fun on this date and just enjoy it.
Like enjoy the process and just like discover and like what you like about him.
Like, you know, don't, you don't have to rush it again.
It can be suddenly and accelerated, but it doesn't have to be rushed.
Yeah.
He said he's not in a rush.
He's actually been married twice, once for 14 years and then another time for two years.
And that was over three years ago, but she said that was a dumpster fire.
Okay.
So I'm going to ask that.
I'm going to challenge you.
Don't talk about that on the date.
Yeah, it was, I didn't, I don't remember how that came up, but that's all he said about
it.
I never went into any conversation on it, which I would have stopped him if we would
have say like, if you see him kind of doing that, come up with some ideas before you go
on the day on how you're going to redirect.
I always just say, Hey, I'd love to hear your story, but I'd really like to get to know
who you are.
Like, I'd get like to get to know who you are today.
Yeah, that's good ladies.
Take that advice.
All right.
Right.
And I'd love to hear your story in time.
The guys don't know.
They don't know what they don't know.
They don't have a Jackie.
Yeah.
They don't have a program like, well, there is a program for men.
Okay.
We have a men's program ladies.
So all these guys that y'all go on dates with that are good guys that maybe not your guy,
y'all Matt, bring them to our community, match them with your sisters, community-based matchmaking,
bring them here.
So yeah, just redirect.
So jot that down ladies.
And I felt the Holy Spirit saying, get the dime out and look at the date.
So I looked at the date on it and it was 2010, which is the year I went through my divorce.
And you know what?
When you told me about the dime, you want to know what I thought?
Yeah.
He's a 10, meaning your spirit mate, but then God is saying, well, no, but she's a 10 as
well. Thank you for your 10. So I love that it was 2010. Oh,
and you know, five plus five is 10. Grace. So you and your
husband five, five, 10. Grace. I got goosebumps on that one.
Holy. Thank you, Jesus. And he doesn't have any he doesn't have
any kids, which honestly, I like that. Yeah, it's always I've
never. I mean, I think merging two families is definitely an
art. I, I was under leadership with a couple like a date for
dating, a dating thing when I was in Reading, and they merged
and they did it. It was beautiful. Oh, yeah, y'all
which is
like older children, younger children, all that. So I mean,
yeah, even blending in laws is not the easiest thing. I mean,
it just really isn't like, blending up two people together.
Like y'all were female and male, like, masculine feminine is hard
to blend. Yeah. Like, blending is hard. Yeah. Oh, I don't feel
like I've got like, I don't have a lot of winter clothes or a lot
of like, I'm like, Oh, my gosh, like a 24 hour date. I'm so
thankful that I felt the Holy Spirit. I'm going to get my
nails done. It was a couple of weeks ago, but they still look
quite good. And I mean, other than one that came off a little
bit because of the band aid, but, but I was just like, it
just made me like it's still it still looks like 99%. There you
go. Perfect. But yeah, just like, I'm like, man, I'm not
like a, a dating clothes person. Like, I'm pretty simple. So
like, wearing like, just go have fun. Yeah. And then update us in
the app how it went. Yeah. Let us know how it went. Yeah. I
bought summer dresses and I have one fall dress, but it's not
very, it's not very fitted. Okay. So yeah, we'll go get
ready. Yeah. Ready? Does it matter if it's fitted? No, no.
Okay. How do you like, obviously you bought it because you liked
it. You thought you look cute in it. Right? Yeah. So where do you
think? Yeah, yeah. I have a couple couple things. But yeah,
go try a few things on go like look in the mirror. See what's
highlighted to you. All right. Take a take a picture and post
it in the app. So we see what I'm so not the person that's
like wearing high heels and Oh, you don't have to. You don't
have to wear tennis shoes. Yes. You can wear what you want girl
whatever you look and feel good in Okay, but I want I'm giving
you homework as I want to see what you look like. Okay. So
that's, that's, um, that's your homework because I need to do
some more shopping too. And then I want an update on your day in
the app. Okay. Okay. All these ladies are gonna be trying to
figure it out too. Like they're gonna want to know as well.
Yeah. And you're gonna give them encouragement. And that's just
gonna start it's gonna start something in our in our face.
Ladies. That's what we used to do in my face all the time we
used to I mean, y'all I would like post like three or four
times a day. Yeah. I mean, we were a much smaller community
then. But honestly, like our phase, like our phase two is
like, the size of what the whole community was at the time that I
was when I joined five years. Oh, wow. So yeah. And then that
other guy rematch that I was talking to, like, I haven't
messaged for a couple days. He was traveling and has his
interview today and tomorrow. Yeah. Never felt this sort of
connection, but just kept on. Yeah, you just keep it there.
Remember, you're level two. We're just feeling things out.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, and this guy's name is Jesse and
he's, he's handsome. He's definitely not drop dead
gorgeous, but his spirit makes him that way. Girl, that was my
husband. Yeah. I mean, I think my husband is like, very
attractive. But yeah, at first, it was his spirit. It was his
heart. It was like, yeah, character. And his personality.
Exactly. He's like, so comfortable with himself. So
just like, yeah, listen to that, ladies. Okay, not be physically
attracted to them at first. Okay. But that is not all a
really
relationship and a marriage and intimacy is built on.
It is not all physical attraction.
It's his expressions and his laugh
and just the way he sees life and yeah.
All right, girl, I'm forcing you off
so that you can go get ready.
I do need to go get ready.
Yes, and I've got to take three more ladies here
and it's already 10 after and I-
Thank you.
I'm gonna go over, so y'all know I always go over
because I'm never short, brief and powerful
even though I asked you all to be.
I had to tell Jackie that this week
and I'm like, I'm never short, brief and powerful.
Like, I hope you don't mind that.
She knows me though.
So-
Lots of wisdom.
I try.
Yeah, thank you.
All right, Lori, have fun.
Post a pic.
Thank you, I will.
All right, Mika, you're up next, girl.
Okay, just to know why I have my video off
because I'm doing a little self-care
getting the eyebrows done, of course.
Yeah, girl, you got to keep it dainty.
Dainty, I'm all about feeling dainty in this season.
So good news is, good report is,
I went to an event through Singles Hub.
They have like, apparently,
some of you may have known about,
they have like all of these different little
Christian single get togethers, like all over.
And so, yeah, and I found them through Salt,
which is an online dating app that I was on
before I went through the heart healing, heart work stuff.
So I felt like, I really love how you guys
are challenging us to just not go in,
like to just go in with the experience.
So I did that.
It was like, I'm just getting to know my brothers in Christ
and other sisters in Christ.
And I had a wonderful time.
We had breakfast in the morning at this diner.
And then the girl that was facilitating,
leaving the group, she actually, because she loves animals,
she actually had us go to a rescue animal shelter
that was basically a little farm that,
you know, we fed the cows and goats
and had a chance to just interact with each other.
And what I found for myself,
I was just kind of just interacting,
is that I can sometimes lean more toward being serious.
And I think a goal that I have for myself is to laugh more
and just be light, you know, not with the intention,
just with this idea of allowing my life to be full.
You know, I feel like I do have,
I bring a lot to the table
and I feel like it doesn't always come out.
Even with my regular friends,
I feel like I'm kind of like, I've been like a burden bearer.
I am a burden bearer.
And I do also have the gift of counsel,
but sometimes a trade-off with that is,
is that you can kind of lean toward being heavy
and always looking to kind of rescue people.
Like sometimes our gifts can get overextended.
Yeah, and I'm definitely,
I didn't realize even what that was.
I'm the same way, like sometimes I feel like
I'm just sometimes too much for people.
Yeah, I've even had one of my good friends
of a long time to actually tell me,
she's like, Mika, sometimes it's just too much.
And initially it stung, but I'm glad she told me,
it was like, oh, okay.
And so I just want to, so I guess my question is,
I liked, I was listening to one of the replays about like,
just doing random things that are like,
maybe smiling at a child in a backseat
or things like that, like those types of activations,
just making eye contact with people.
But what are some ways that,
I think another part of the heart work,
I'm also one of those people I like,
I enjoy the heart work, so I want you to keep doing it.
So I miss the hard work.
I was raised to not trust people,
not really, only trust your immediate family
and don't really share, keep your stuff in your family,
Southern background, even though I was raised in New York,
my mom and my dad are both from the South.
So this idea of not trusting was constantly,
and I can even see it in,
I still didn't see it in my brother,
but I can especially see it in myself
after doing the hard work that like,
it's hard for me to trust.
And especially because I'm like a burner mirror
and you hear so much stuff and you're like,
even though I purposely, I've done a lot of work,
but in terms of not necessarily believing the negative,
but I guess I think like, what are some tips
or ways that you work through it
as someone who is constantly hearing people's stuff
and being present and caring for others
and being in that place of empathy to keep yourself light?
I know this idea of giving it to Jesus,
laying at his feet, you know, like all that stuff.
I mean, yeah, we can say that to our blur in our face
and it's, but it's so much, it's not as easy as we,
as it's easier said than done.
said than done. Like, right? Yeah. This is a really good question. Um, a lot of things
are coming up, um, while you're talking. So if I go off topic, just bear with me here.
Okay. Um, cause again, I'm just with ladies. And for those of you that are maybe in, in
ladies, probably we're going to be watching this and replay when y'all are coming on these
lines, I take notes because I'm listening to y'all. And sometimes I want to make sure
like when I'm hearing from Holy spirit, I'm keeping notes so that I'm still listening
to y'all. Um, so don't ever think that I'm not like paying attention, that I'm distracted.
I'm, I'm literally just writing things down that you all are saying that. And then also
what Holy spirit is speaking to me. So with that being said, um, so that is a good question.
Like what are some ways that I basically like, how do I balance that part of that gift of
when you are, when you do have those giftings and you do hear, and you kind of bear some
of people's burdens and you, you hear all of these stories and, and how, like, are you
asking like, how do you not allow that to kind of get you to a point where you're not
draining yourself, but you can actually go out and enjoy life where you don't have to
be as serious? Yes, that's exactly what I'm asking because people are experiencing a wall
because I think I'm kind of, I think sometimes they're experienced, I'm not giving them enough
line, I guess. And one of the replays, one of you guys were talking about, you know,
even if it's not a good experience, give them, let people be who they are, you know? Yeah.
Ebony, I think always talks about that, just allowing people to be who they are. She's
so good. Like, she's so good. I love listening to her replays cause she's so good. Um,
yeah, like, but that's the correct, yes. You summed it up perfectly. Yeah. So, and then
would you, would you say that you, do you like, do you, would you say you're a feeler?
I am. Wow. How'd you know? Yes. Because I'm the same way. Yes. I can relate to.
And again, like I think I, and I operate, I think sometimes in that same way where
I'm serious because I'm, I'm feeling a lot from other people. So I'm always showing up as this
person with empathy and like wanting to help people that yes, like not being fun or like my,
my husband always jokes with me. Like he, I always call him a weirdo because he is a weirdo
and he's always joking and laughing. And I'm like, can you just be serious?
But he's like the fun outgoing, like not as serious. And I am, and he's always like,
you need to loosen up. Like God knew you needed someone in your life to loosen you up,
but it's because I am like, I feel things. And so I am always doing that. So it's like,
we kind of counterbalance each other. So I do understand what you're saying. And so,
yeah. I think the fact that you recognize that is one, the first step
when God gives you the ability to, to have the awareness that will help you tremendously.
And so just again, seeking the Lord is just like, Lord, when I am operating too much in my gift,
asking him to reveal that in ways that you will, where he will get your attention.
And so, and then like you said, you are making an intention to laugh more.
So hold yourself accountable to that.
What are some ways that you are going to be intentional with laughing more?
What are some activities? And again, in your prayer time, what are some things
lighthearted that you've always wanted to do that God has just placed in your heart to do?
I like to roll down a hill of snow.
I couldn't hear that. I think I heard something about snow. It kind of cut out a little bit.
I would like to roll down a hill of snow. It was so fun when I was a kid.
Where do you live?
Yeah. But
Where do you live?
I live in New Jersey.
New Jersey. Okay.
Princeton Junction, New Jersey.
Okay. Are you part of the Jersey single city group?
I am not yet. I don't think I am yet.
Okay. I want you to go on the resource page because there was a lot of girls from Jersey
that I met at the five-year party and they are a lot of fun.
Okay.
I want you connecting with those girls.
Jersey and New York.
I think Stephanie,
are you in the New York single city?
I know she took her camera off,
but Stephanie NYC and then Stephanie Davis.
Ladies, I want you to get in those single cities.
They're on Facebook, but in
the resource tab of our app, you will have access.
You just got to click on it.
I think I did join.
Okay. Yeah, definitely check that out.
I only know because there was a lot of Jersey girls,
handful of them at the retreat and at the party.
I do want to get in the-
Yeah.
So get with some of those girls
because I will tell you are going to have a good time with them.
I had a good time with them at the party.
So I like that you're being intentional with that.
Laugh more, doing more things like that.
Again, just the fact that God is making you aware of like,
hey, I'm overextending this gift of mine.
That's going to be huge.
Again, just seeking him saying,
Lord, I need you to literally almost slap me in
the face so that I recognize when I'm doing it.
Give you that awareness when you're doing it.
Then that will help because that's what I have to do.
I really have to do that.
But so hopefully that answers your question.
But some things that were coming up to me,
the Holy Spirit, and I'm just asking you,
these are, again, you don't have to have the answers to these.
These are just things I feel like God is wanting me to share with you.
Okay.
Your Southern background is like all of this stuff
that you're talking about this burden barrier and all that kind of stuff.
Have you taken a look at your generational background?
Yes, I have.
Okay. Is there any unhealed trauma from maybe not you,
but maybe in your generational background that
maybe God is going to highlight to you or has
highlighted to you that he wants you to heal from or to break off?
I'm going to pray. I can pray into that.
Thank you. That's a huge question.
Yeah. I don't know that literally the word generational came up,
and so that's the only thing that's speaking to me about that.
So pray into that.
What does your name mean?
It means gentleness, kindness,
and I respond to who God says I am.
Yes. Okay. I had a feeling because obviously,
I see the word meek, and you were like,
I'm serious, and you're not as fun, right?
But I'm sitting here thinking that's not who she is.
You're sitting here and identifying with this part of you that's not you.
That's a good point too,
because I have other friends that say the opposite of that one friend,
but I guess it just echoes in my head with regards to not being in a relationship.
I feel like I'm good at making friends,
and I'm definitely a people person,
but I think just recently.
Because you've maybe overextended this gift,
that you're operating now in this counterfeit part.
I relate to this because I've been this way as well.
I've had such a strong gift of discernment,
and empathy, and feeling since I was really young,
and I wasn't a believer.
I mean, I didn't come up in a background like my family was not big believers,
but I always had this strong gift of discernment,
and just empathy, and feeling for people.
The enemy knew that, and saw that,
and even though I didn't have a family that I grew up with that was close to the Lord,
he knew my path.
He knew what God was going to do in my life.
He created these lies about me,
that I believed that being too much,
or not enough, not being worth enough,
and that this gift got overextended,
and then made me to start believe this lie that then I stopped using that gift.
And so, I can't help but wonder if this belief that you're so serious,
and that maybe it's causing you to believe that you're not worthy of this gift,
causing you to feel like you're not something because of this is really actually a lie that
the enemy is wanting you to believe because you do have this gift.
He's just trying to get you so distracted from it to help, like not wanting you to operate
in it and to take you away from actually what your true identity is, which he, you do have
that gifting, but now he's wanting you to focus on that and that's who you are, but
it's actually not who you are, it's a gift, but you are kind, you are gentle, you aren't
serious.
Like, do you have a serious side to you?
Well, yeah, we all can have a serious side to us, but who, who are you?
Who did God create you to be?
That's really good.
So that's what God is kind of wanting me to share with you.
So y'all see, like, ladies, this is hard work stuff.
Like this is not even dating stuff.
So don't be afraid to come with any of these kinds of questions.
So any of you that are even watching the replay, put these kinds of questions in our app, like
that's how Holy Spirit will come in and work in this community.
And these are all bits and pieces that brought us into this preparation period for our husbands.
So Mika, I hope that speaks to you.
I hope that blesses you.
Chew on it a little bit.
All right.
I will.
It was very helpful.
Okay.
Thanks Carla.
You are so welcome.
All right.
Keep us updated.
All right.
If you got more to share after, you know, you spend some time with that, please, by
all means, let us know.
All right.
Okay.
Ashley, I'm going to, you've got 30.
I just have a few minutes left.
Okay.
Leah, can you stick around after Ashley?
Okay.
Perfect.
Awesome.
Thanks Leah.
I appreciate it.
I appreciate you ladies for like working with me and my not being short, brief and powerful.
I mean, maybe I'm powerful.
I hope, but maybe not short and brief.
All right.
What's your question, Ashley?
So first I did reply when you asked something on my post from like five days ago.
It was really long though.
Okay.
Yeah.
I might have.
Did I reply over the weekend?
You didn't reply over the weekend.
I don't think.
I know like there was some and I was trying to get to him, but I, yeah, being in Austin,
I was like jumping back and forth.
So yeah.
Okay.
But in, so the, I love that you named him Mr. Swing Dancer.
I was like, that was great.
Okay.
That helps me.
That helps me remember y'all.
Mr. Swing Dancer.
Okay.
But in that, in that long, I, sorry, I was, I would write something and then I'd be like,
oh, there's more.
So there's a lot.
And it was really long.
Good.
No, I like detail.
That's totally fine.
I love it.
Were you on Ebony's call and did she get updates on that?
No, I talked, I did mention Ebony's call and that's why you'd asked about Mr. Swing
Dancer.
Cause I didn't really say anything about him.
I sent a letter to my sister and I cried or from my sister and I was crying on the call.
That's great.
Okay.
Gotcha.
See, that's what I'm saying.
Like sometimes I'm like, if I can't get to the replay and I'm like, wait, I didn't hear
the details.
So that's why sometimes like, and Ebony will do that when y'all come on and share details
with me.
But if she's the one replying, she might not know the full story.
So we, we do.
She and I do try to keep in touch and like fill each other in, but we sometimes miss
each other.
So that's.
Totally fine.
Okay.
So I did update, like kind of like give background stuff with Mr. Swing Dancer, but he's, I think
even when I gave, when I told you that information, like I was already like, yeah, no, that's
not, that can't go anywhere.
So I knew that.
And then I think I inadvertently managed to get him to just walk himself out.
I'd asked him some questions the other night and his, his lack of maturity just came out
where he just felt like I was.
He didn't say it this way.
I just, I'm feeling like I know him more than he realizes in some ways.
And he just felt like I was pushing his, his leadership or challenging his leadership and
authority.
I'm like, dude, we're not even dating.
Like I already told you, we're not dating.
This isn't going anywhere.
We just dance.
So, and he didn't want to talk about it that night.
And he hasn't texted.
What question did you ask him and what did he say?
And then what was your interpretation?
So he had posted something on Facebook about he just
wants a woman that's his piece.
He wants his, wait, what?
A woman that's like his piece and doesn't bring war,
like the nagging and the.
OK.
He wants his woman to basically be peace, P-E-A-C-E.
Yes, yes, not war.
And so I was just asking him like, yeah,
tell me more about what that looks like.
OK, I love that question.
Ladies, did you hear that?
He said something that's, y'all saw my response on that.
I don't know.
I didn't type it that way, but that is what,
but we've had this conversation before.
Yeah, I mean, saying something like that on your Facebook,
I mean, that's a little odd to me.
But I love how you're like, tell me more about that.
So see, like even when she said that and what he said,
I had a little judgment.
So we all do it, ladies.
We all do it.
And so.
So I just was like, what does that look like when
there's a disagreement?
Or like, what does it look like, like your part?
Like what does leading well look like to you?
What are you doing to prepare?
And, you know, just questions like that.
I love that.
So like, what's that?
He did not.
Gave him anxiety.
It gave him an anxiety.
It gave him anxiety.
Yeah, he told me that.
Yeah, he actually did use that.
It gave him anxiety.
Oh, my God.
It gave him anxiety.
So and he didn't want to.
I so I I made a point to try and get away so I could call.
And he didn't he didn't want to call.
He was like, I'm tired.
I just want to relax.
I was like, whatever.
And I didn't really expect to call or a text.
So I'm guessing I won't get any calls or texts.
And I'll see him on the 14th and we'll see what happens then.
Because that's there you go.
But see, I love that.
You're like, hey, what does this look like before you like
passed any sort of judgment?
You gave him an opportunity to explain it and be more clear
with what he meant.
And then you gave him like you gave him a question.
So what does it look like for a man to lead?
Yeah, well, what's like what is your version of that look like?
What's that look like to you?
Because you're going to leave.
What how do you think you would show up?
Yeah, I love that question.
Ladies like that is a good question.
I wouldn't necessarily ask that on a first date, OK?
But if you are on like a third date and you're kind of like,
you know, second, third date, you're kind of feeling it out.
And it kind of gets to that question.
You guys are kind of talking about,
you know, relationships and what you're looking for.
Don't be afraid to ask a guy like, you know, I'm looking for a masculine man
that leads well, like what does a man leading in a relationship look like to you?
Because then he's going to literally tell you how he's going to show up
as a man in a like in a role in that way.
And the lack of, you know, not responding also tells me how he shows up.
Exactly. And that's what I'm saying.
These are good questions.
Their responses will give you so much information.
What are they?
Are they mature, masculine and marriage minded ladies?
And again, you're not going to like you're not going to always be able
to discover that in a first date.
Like it might take a series of dates of getting to know these guys,
especially guys that are really interested or really wanting
a girl to like them.
They're going to show up as their best self.
I mean, I would hope most guys are trying to show up as their best self.
Not that they all do.
I mean, we all we've all been I mean, I would like I'm imagining
we've all been on dates like that, that you're like, man,
this is your best self on a first date.
I don't think I want to go on another date with you.
This is as good as it gets.
I don't know what I want to see on what to look like on the 10th date.
Like, no, thank you.
But like we want to believe that that's like they're probably showing up
as their best self.
So again, like that's why it's important to have like two or three dates
with somebody.
To allow that to come out.
So, yeah, super important.
I like that you did that.
Thank y'all.
Y'all just learn something from Ashley.
Take that.
So in in the my long response there, I do have actually a question.
With that, if you can, you know, when you get a chance to read all
that, look at that.
What can you tell me what day it was from?
It just says five days ago.
OK, five days ago.
And.
And then one more question.
I'm sorry.
That's OK.
When you replied to me, did you reply under my comment
or did you reply to your post?
I replied under your comment.
Does it not show up that way?
That's why I haven't seen it.
So OK.
Reply as my own post again?
Yes.
I won't see.
If you reply under my comment on your post,
it will not notify me.
OK.
Good to know.
I didn't.
And that goes for all of you ladies.
OK.
Just always, if myself or Ebony is ever replying to your post,
don't click reply to our comment.
Just reply to your own post.
Got it.
Because we have like.
So helpful.
Because we have like admin.
I'm like, did you guys see it?
Yeah, I know sometimes.
And that's what I'm saying.
That's why I'm like, if we ever miss it
and you're like waiting on a reply for us,
just shoot us another post because then we should see that
and then we can go search or get more details about that.
Because I do think now that I think about it,
I think you did say something about it
and I just didn't get to go search it.
Yes.
Because I was in Austin this weekend.
Yes.
And I was like, so I'm glad you brought that back up
because that's what happened then.
You would have replied to my comment
and that's why it never showed up.
OK.
So now I know.
And I knew you were in Austin, so I
knew it was possible that it was going to take longer.
So not a big deal.
Thank you for that.
Thank you for that grace and patience.
I really appreciate it.
So nothing that I posted about yet.
So I will say, first off, I did have a win
that I almost posted last night and then I just didn't.
So I want you to go and post it.
You can share it now, but I still
want you to go post it because there's
some women that are not going to watch the replay that are
going to go and see your post.
So ladies, I do want you posting.
My very first boyfriend, like literally
my very first boyfriend.
He had texted me earlier this year
and then I found out that he was like, hey, is this your number?
I'm like, dude, do you know how much work you had
to do to get my phone number?
That's crazy.
That was already a little weird.
Then I found out that his marriage is not good
and I was like, no, not texting anymore.
And so then last night, he texted
and he was like, as I was moving into my new place,
I was looking through old photos and he sent a picture of me
that he still had.
I was like, we were 14.
Weird.
You're like, dude, maybe that's why your marriage is not
doing well.
You got pictures of your old girlfriend.
Yes.
I was like, that was a long time ago.
Sounds like things aren't going well with your wife.
Sorry to hear that.
I pray you'll find the healing you need in this season.
And he just didn't text back.
So I was like, thank goodness.
So it's a win that you're kind of like, OK,
I'm recognizing these are unhealthy behaviors
and you can bless and move along.
And I just the response was so easy for me,
which is a new thing for me for it to just be easy.
Yeah, because you've gotten some healing.
Yeah.
That's what's that's what heart work will do.
And you'll start responding that way.
So yes, this is a huge win.
Go share that in the wins.
OK, for your sisters like that will give everybody
so much encouragement.
Like, ladies, do not be afraid to post.
OK, I don't care how long it is.
If you've got to type a novel, y'all,
I'm used to reading y'all's novels.
I typed a bunch.
You know, it might take me a minute to reply to you again.
That's you know, we'll we'll get to you.
I promise you will.
We will.
But again, I'm the girl that's not short,
brief and powerful.
I'm just really long winded and powerful.
So you won't I will understand you.
You can you can post the long things if you need to.
Perfect.
Thank you.
So then my one my one question that I've had,
I was kind of I've kind of been twirling around in my mind.
So I have told quite a number of people, not not everyone.
I'm definitely not posting it about our challenge.
And nobody's gotten back to me, which is fine.
I really am totally fine with that right now.
But before I started this, there was I went I my very first date
was like and like literally the first date I've ever gone
since I since, you know, being married and divorced.
Let's see.
What was I thinking to name him for you?
I love it.
He's he's a he's a professional ballroom teacher.
So I don't know who's asking the answer.
He he's a professional ballroom teacher.
Can we call him Fred Astaire?
Yeah.
Yes, that's.
That's great.
OK.
Fred or just Fred, whatever you want to go.
All right.
So he had already told me, like, I know he's divorced.
I know he's a little nervous and shy.
So we had a good day.
I was an absolute wreck as far as, like, emotions.
Like, so nervous.
But we just went to a play.
So it was really easy.
So we didn't have to do too much talking.
Yeah.
See, you know, as we, you know, we walked to the cars
together and said, you know, he'd like to do it again.
And, you know, I kind of, like, texted back a little bit,
like, hey, had a great time or whatever.
And this was, like, months ago.
And I didn't really hear back from him.
But then I go to where we dance, right, where we met.
We met dancing.
I see him again.
So the last time I saw him and we danced.
Hold on.
I can't hear you all of a sudden.
You went out.
Oh.
Oh, no.
I can't hear you.
Can you hear me now?
Yes, I can.
OK, perfect.
Sorry.
I was playing with my headphone box.
OK.
So the last time that I saw him, I just kind of asked
some questions and he didn't ask me out again, which was fine.
But I kind of wondered, like, well, maybe I should wonder,
because I wasn't, since I wasn't in this yet, you know,
he was like, I'm not, like, super attracted to him,
like, but we didn't really talk a whole lot.
Like, I'm not opposed to talking to him more, but not attracted.
Like, I don't know.
So I was like, should I, like, say something to him?
Well, if he again, what we will coach you, ladies, in phase
in this phase is after the first date, we really like
we we tell you, ladies, drop the hanky to get the first date,
because sometimes guys just mean like they need to have a clue.
Right. I don't mean that in a mean way.
But sometimes guys just want to feel secure that they have a shot like
that, they're going to actually get a yes if they ask you.
OK, so that's why oftentimes, ladies, you have to, like,
encourage them to ask you on a date
because they want to know that you're actually going to say yes.
So on a first like before the first date, we are going to say,
hey, let's drop the hanky. OK.
For a second date,
we're going to oftentimes express
that you ladies wait for them to offer a second date.
But we want you to make sure that after the first date,
if you enjoyed the date and you would want to go on a second date,
you're going to make sure that they are aware that you enjoyed yourself
and you'd be open to it.
They're not my names.
I think I did.
I'm not a mind reader, babe.
And I'm like, but you should be.
We're married. We're one.
Which means you should read my mind.
We had more texts afterwards. OK.
But then he never asked again. Let's do that again.
So, again, did you say, hey, that was like, thank you so much.
I had a really good time. Let's do that again.
I don't know. It was I was looking back.
I'm like, no, this was in July. I knew it was a while ago.
Kevin. Well, here's the thing.
What the when you were sharing that with me, my thought was this.
I don't think it is.
I'm getting the vibe that you're kind of like you don't really.
Yeah, that's kind of us.
Yeah, my my gut was telling me.
Reach out to him and introduce him to this community,
because maybe he isn't for you, but maybe that like instinct to me.
Yeah, I should reach out to him.
Maybe it's because he's for one of your sisters here in the community.
OK. Yeah, I was definitely thinking about telling him last.
Next time I see him.
Yeah. And just tell him about Jackie's community.
The men's program is called 1822.
Proverbs 1822.
And because you said he was he was a nice guy, right?
Yeah. Yeah. Like a nice guy, probably.
So just say, hey, like, you know, I really appreciate us going out.
Like we had I had a nice time with you.
I don't I don't think we're probably romantically like
obviously like connected.
But I'm part of this community, the single community.
And there are a lot of really great single women.
And we have a men's program.
And I thought maybe, you know, we need a lot of really good men.
And I thought of you and thought you were you like you're.
enjoyable person and I thought maybe if you're interested there maybe is a girl in our community
that you'd be interested in. Here's some information look it up JackieDorman.com
and then if you if he's or if you go into the resources resource tab and you sign up for the
affiliate link I think that's still in the resource tab you can set up an affiliate link for yourself
and then you can share your link and if they sign up then you get um you'll get money deposited to
you. Oh I like that idea. Like it's a referral thing. I think it's like 75 dollars or something
like if they sign up for the program then you get like 75. Oh yeah I didn't know what it was
the link's still in there. Yeah so definitely definitely do that and then be like here like
use this link it's you know and then they'll click on that I mean and he can still look up
JackieDorman.com but if he signs up going just straight to JackieDorman.com and signs up from
hers and not from your link you won't get that referral. Gotcha. Does that make sense? Yep.
Okay. All right thank you I have to run I have to pack up all the things and get to the next
next other building to the new building. Hey all right keep keep us posted okay.
All right thanks so much Karla. Bye guys thanks again Leah. Hey Leah how's everything going?
Well um. Any new new info from the dates? Um the one that I met on the ark um that we've been
chatting for I guess maybe two weeks now. Okay. Um he just we haven't done a video I haven't asked
um I don't know I and I should I mean he's kind of in a weird transition place because he just
moved. That's right. He's renting a cabin and he's not um he's he's waiting to buy this house
once the government shutdown's over so. Yeah we gotta ladies let's be praying into that
this government shutdown like we gotta be praying into that. Sorry keep going. So I bet things are
flowing really well I know he we've talked about our faith and he didn't really seem to know much
about mine I didn't I never even heard of his and so his is Seventh-day Baptist. Okay. Which I've
they observe the Sabbath but it's kind of like the Baptist faith. Okay. And so he said he liked
what he saw of mine except that we didn't observe the Sabbath the Ten Commandments is what he said
which which I think he was referring to the Sabbath. Okay. So um but and he you know he's
been asking me a lot of questions like what what are your favorite flowers and you know things
like that you know he and he he does come up with these interesting questions of the blue
oh will you pass that that that one or um you know just kind of makes funny comments and he's
yeah he's pretty funny and he's the one that's been a widow for 10 years and I've been widowed
for 10. Yep. So but he lives like he this house is like in the middle of nowhere. Yeah.
So I don't know um and I do live in a remote location where you can only fly or boat in and
out so I'm kind of used to remote but you know every place I go is like you know just a few
Yeah. Okay. That's what I thought. So like I can go to the grocery store and it's like
five miles away where his grocery store is 70 miles so and and I think as you get older
you know although he says it's growing because they're opening some mines there
but um so that's going um there's this man that's at church his name is Greg and
I don't know his marital background but he worked in the same building that I did I retired three
years ago but the last two years I was working from home due to COVID and I came back on my
last day to retire and I remember seeing him and I saw him before but I didn't really know him and
he'd only worked there for I think three years. Yeah. And he moved away and he just moved back
and he I met him at church um um and
And so I don't, I don't know a whole lot about him. I did kind
of look up his Facebook. Yeah, saw a few things. But so so he
usually sits in front of me, but the Sunday, somebody was sitting
where he was normally sitting. So we ended up next to each
other on the same pew. And he's kind of quiet. And I am. But
once you get to talking to him, he talks, you know, okay, good.
And so it was funny, because Monday morning, I woke, I got on
Facebook Monday morning, and up popped, you know, that they had
the Facebook friends. Yeah, it was like a friend you might
know. Well, it was a huge picture of him. And, and I'm
like, Oh, funny. So I clicked on it. And he was so he was looking
for friends. And he wrote that he had just moved back to
Alaska. And so you're on the Facebook dating, and it popped
up with him. Well, it's, it's dating. And well, they have two
separate categories, one's for friends, and one's for dating.
But the ones that a lot of people that are in the friends,
some of it looks like they're looking for a date. So it's kind
of confusing. But there are women, you know, that you can
match it, you know, friends, you know, like, if you just move
somewhere, and you're looking for some friends. So basically,
and I can think of a lot of people want to make friends. And
if it leads to something more, you know,
yeah, they're like, open, just Yeah, I mean, they're open for
any, like, just friendship. And then if it happens to be a male,
and that grows into something else, and right, right. Okay, so
it wasn't, it wasn't the dating one, it was the friend one. And
so I clicked the smiley face. And so, so then I didn't, I
didn't get on Facebook till last night. And I didn't. And he
didn't, because usually, I think they have to match with
you, before you can have a, like an interaction. Okay. So he
didn't. I didn't see the activity, but I haven't looked
this morning yet. And he posted it yesterday morning. Okay, I
just be a morning person.
Or he just might not even be on his Facebook often. Like
sometimes people just not. Here's the thing. When you see
him on Sunday, if he hasn't responded by then be like, Hey,
I saw you on that Facebook friend thing. I sent you a
smile. Did you happen to see me? I'm gonna ask you to be bold,
Leah. Leah, I'm actually be bold girl. We're good. Yeah. What
what's the hesitation? Because I think there's something like,
do you think like, what, what's the, what's the hold up? What's
what's the belief?
I guess I I'm used to men making the first move. Okay. Now, I
might would say to him, would you like to have coffee
sometime? That feels more comfortable. And I am three
years older than him. And who knows, he might be looking for
someone. I mean, this was just friends. So I'm not expecting
anything other than friends. Okay. Um, and so I don't know,
I used to be making the first move, right? So is that what
you're also do you think that's why you're also waiting for not
doing the video calls with the guys as well?
I don't really mind. I mean, I don't really mind asking this
one guy for a video call. And he seems, you know, like a
really solid person. And, and, and I know, there's another guy
that I was chatting with on meet my age, guys, and I, I kind of
just got bored with it. Because, I mean, there's one guy that he
seems really nice. And he's very encouraging and very upbeat
personality. And he did say in the beginning, I'd like to get
to, to know you better, you know, through our conversations.
And, um, and I and he does live locally. Okay. It does say he's
a Christian. I don't know. But
so this is more recent.
Yeah, it's been it's been kind of ongoing for a couple months.
But I kind of just been dropping off that site, maybe
maybe once a week I'll get on or we were chatting like okay because he's local I
want you to drop that hanky too yeah I know I need to okay okay how long do you
need to drop it I'll try to do it today you know I mean and you don't have to do
today I mean can this week next Tuesday when we come on the call you're gonna
have let's see we've got Greg at church you're gonna ask him to coffee okay is
that you said that when you feel more comfortable asking him to coffee right
right okay so Greg you're gonna ask the coffee this other guy on meet my age
you're gonna drop the hanky to do you feel like you'd rather me well yeah I
think I would like to see let's meet him in person because he's local yeah so
you're gonna have you're gonna set up two dates so two in-person days they
don't have to be in the week okay like if they can't meet this week that's fine
but you're gonna drop that hanky say hey let's go do something Greg you're gonna
ask for coffee this guy from meet my age you're gonna ask him like hey we've
been on here for several months you're local why don't we go hang out and do
this or this yeah that's a good way either of those things yeah I like that
the way that okay so you're giving him two options and he gets to decide okay
that's a hanky drop because here's the thing he's got to pick it up they don't
pick it up then you don't have to fuss with it okay but you've at least put
you've initiated okay same thing with Greg hey I really enjoyed your company
when you sat next to me why don't we get to know each other like why don't why
don't we go grab coffee and have a conversation do you have time this week
do you have any availability this week I'm available this day in this day
either of those days work for you if not which day works okay so you're gonna do
that and we got to get you a video call with this Nevada guy I I need to know
that this guy is is actually not a scammer okay because I'm getting
concerned that this guy possibly could be a scammer not trying to freak you
out why search up thank you oh I want to make sure she said something about nap
suggestions so I definitely did write that down um but yeah Leah I'm just I'm
not trying to freak you out but I just don't want you to get to the point where
you're investing this time with this person because you're talking good
things about him like you know now I mean I don't think I necessarily love
the fact that he's like oh you guys don't observe this and that and all that
kind of stuff like oh he said he was okay with yeah I get that but we want to
equally yoke y'all we're all like on the same page you know again like at the
end of the day do y'all believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross and he's
our Savior like like that's got like that's got to be like for sure um but um
I just don't want me again if he's I don't want him tiptoeing around oh well
I just moved I don't have internet I don't do this and that I just don't want
this to lead into like excuses and then he like is developing like you're oh
what's your favorite flower and all this and all of a sudden it's like he's like
gonna try to hook you and the next thing you know like they're trying to scam you
okay that is the only reason why I'm like let's get this video call because
he is not who he says he is he's gonna he's gonna dodge that video call every
single time and if you ask for a video call and he keeps dodging it and you're
like okay like I mean like I need this before we continue to move forward with
talking like I mean like we need to have this and if we can't have like I mean if
he keeps dodging it like then you're gonna have to set a firm boundary and if
he's dodging it then it's you gotta you gotta block them I just don't want you
carrying this on to to the point where you're gonna get invested in it and it's
gonna like wreak havoc so make sense yeah so I want that like to per Greg and
meet my age guy we're gonna get some we're gonna drop those hankies and then
You're going to drop the hanky for this video date.
And if this guy by Tuesday, if he has not agreed to a video date and at least given
you a day for a video date, then are we good saying goodbye to him?
Okay.
So that's my homework for you.
So next Tuesday, I want to see you.
And I have, I did get asked out by the 77 year old man at church again last week.
And then, well, and then he came up after he, and he was sitting behind me and he knew
that I was sitting by the, the younger guy close to my age.
And as soon as he walked out, he snagged me again.
Okay.
You're okay.
You're in Alaska.
Oh man.
I, okay.
One of the women that I met this weekend in Austin, and she's from Fort Worth, which is
close to me.
She is like 79 I think, and I know that Alaska and Texas are very far, but if he asked you
on a date or asked to go out, I mean, maybe he's not like asking him, he's just wanting
like friendships, right?
Like this guy's lonely.
Well, he did, he's, he asked me on a dinner date last year and it was last minute.
He won tickets.
And then he asked me, or last weekend he pulled me aside and said, he saw me on some dating
site and I don't know what it was and he sent me a heart and he wanted to make sure that
I didn't feel like he was stalking me is what he said.
He said, but if you're interested, he's probably being so sweet.
And then at the end, at the end he kind of said, but if, you know, if you want to go
to coffee, even as friends, you know, and so then I was busy and I, cause I kept trying
to decide whether I was going to or not.
And he's a very super social guy and he's always surrounded by lots of people doing
things.
He posts stuff on Facebook all the time.
And then he also asked me yesterday or Sunday, he, he asked me if I wanted to go to his care
group that evening with him.
He was bringing shrimp and so they must've been having a dinner.
And I'm, and I, I wasn't interested.
I said, not tonight.
He might be thinking another time, but.
Okay.
Leah, I don't, I don't think he's for you, but I think he's being highlighted to you
because I think you're supposed to introduce him to this community.
Okay.
Cause I think he might be a great guy.
Yeah.
I think, I think that's the only reason, like, again, y'all are in Alaska, like, yeah.
And there's no women at our church.
That's what I'm saying.
I think, I think he's being highlighted to you because it's possible that his person
is in here.
Y'all like, we have a lot of women that are in, I mean, I'm telling you this woman that
I met, he was just like, I'm older, it's not here for me, whatever.
I'm surrounded by all the younger girls here.
And I'm like, oh man, I'm like, no, we have like a lot of our success stories are not
from like the little 20 and 30 year old girls.
I'm like, it, we are the older ones.
I'm like, I didn't get engaged until I was 40 and I'd never been married before.
I mean, look at Renee.
She's, I don't even know how old Renee is actually, but she's never been married and
she just got married.
Like it's, it's not all the 20 and 30 somethings y'all.
It's not.
And so I think you're supposed to introduce him to this community.
Because I, I'm like, I kid you not that what, like, I, I thought to myself, oh, 77, okay.
Okay.
I'm like, okay.
You see it.
He definitely is older than you.
I'm like, but then I remembered, I met a woman this weekend in our community that is in her
late seventies.
I'm like, so they're out there.
And Jackie made such a point this week and at the party to really talk to everyone in
our community about be on the lookout for your single brothers and sisters.
That was something that God wanted her to do five years ago.
And she, like one thing that she's always said in this community, and you might've heard
her say this ladies, what you make happen.
What you help make happen for others, God will make happen for you."
And she challenged the people at the party this weekend,
pray for other people's spirit mates.
Be looking out for each other's spirit mates.
So I think maybe, just maybe, his spirit mate is in here.
And you're gonna help make that happen, and then God's gonna make it happen for you.
So you got a lot of homework, Leah.
Are you ready?
All right.
Well, I'm gonna be checking up with you next Tuesday, okay?
And then post, ladies post, okay?
Thanks for sticking out with me.
I know it was extra long.
Thank you to all those that are watching and replay as well.
I hope that you all are blessed this week.
And I so appreciate each and every one of you.
Yes, so I will see you all next week, and I will see you in the app.
Post, post, post.
Bye, Mika.
Bye, Carol Jean, Liz, and Stephanie.
All right, have a great day, ladies.