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All right. So two different things that we can do here. So Jim and Phyllis, I'm sure

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do not want to be the only students in this heart work for couples because then they're

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going to get my full attention and maybe my full attention is too much. I think it could

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be. Yeah. And so if you could turn up a little bit, you're a little bit low. Really? Yeah.

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To me to ask you, I have you up. Let's see how you are. Okay. Am I, am I, am I too low

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to you, Carla and Jeremy? No, you're okay. Yeah. You guys just had to turn mine up too.

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Yeah. Perfect. All right. Okay. So I think what we're going to do that makes the most

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sense is we're just going to do a little overview of what this heart work for couples thing

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is all about, what we're doing with it. Give Jeremy and Carla and Brian and Megan and

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whoever the couple is that you're bringing in a chance to catch up. Okay. And then we'll

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do week one's coaching next week. All right. So if Phyllis, if you and Jim want to go on

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to week two, week two has been posted today, so it is available in your app or you guys

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can just, you know, hang out week one, process it a little bit more. And, um, okay. All right.

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So let's go over a couple of things, shall we? Okay. So Phyllis and Carla had done the

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heart work, Jim, Jeremy, have you guys done the heart work? Like the part work for reg

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just for people, not for couples. Okay. Okay. I mean, I read the book we read. No, I was

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talking to Jeremy. If there is a way for him to, can he somehow access the men's heart

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work or because he's married, would that not work? No, he could access the men's heart

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work and he can even go to the men's coaching stuff on Monday. It's not specifically for

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singles. It's more of a men's group than it is a single men's group. Same with you. Is

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that included in the monthly fee that I pay the 37 for him to go to? Like, if you wanted

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to do that, she doesn't have access like on his, on the app, he only has that. Well, what

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you're going to do Phyllis, because you're married, what you're going to do Phyllis,

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because you're married is January 1st. Um, spirit, the spirit mates community is opening.

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So you're going to transfer your $37 over to spirit mates and it's not 37, a person is 37,

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a couple. And so that'll be a subscription. And so he can have access to anything that

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is accessible in the program via the spirit mates community, including the men's group.

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So once again, the men's group meets on Mondays, it meets tonight. Um, and it's at the same time

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as this, but you guys will be graduated from this. So it doesn't matter. And it's powerful.

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The guys meet they're really transparent with each other. David has, you know, other leaders

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come on met male leaders that, you know, men just deal with different things than women deal with.

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And it's a very safe space for guys to process. And it's a good thing. So I encourage both of

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you guys to get involved with that. Once you're in the spirit mates community in January. Okay.

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All right. Let's talk about heartwork for couples just briefly. So Carla and Phyllis,

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you guys have taken heartwork before. This is not like that. Okay. It does have some of the

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basic tenants of it. Meaning like the very first week of heartwork for couples is shared surrender.

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You guys know that heartwork for individuals is supernatural surrender. So, but when you get

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married, it's not just about one person surrendering. It's about both people surrendering,

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right? Because if you have a marriage where there's one person that surrender, and I don't

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mean to each other, I mean, to God, you have one person who surrendered and another person,

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who's really not quite sure that they want to surrender for whatever reason.

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That's where a lot of conflict comes in. David used to do something called yell at me in the

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spirit, meaning that when he felt like he couldn't talk to me because I had too much trauma to hear

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him, I was super triggered by something he was doing. And it isn't because what he was doing

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was wrong. It was because it was poking something in me that was unhealed. And most of marriage

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where there's conflict, you're just poking each other's orphan is what I call it. You're just

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poking each other's orphan, the place where the person's unhealed, where they still have all

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kinds of mindsets of scarcity and lack and rejection and abandonment, anger. Every time

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you show up in anger, I want you to document that when you show up in frustration and irritation

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and just straight up anger, make sure you document that because that means that you feel very unsafe.

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You feel very unsafe when you show up in anger.

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Because remember anger is fear and hurts body guard.

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I learned this in psychology.

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I didn't learn this in church.

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I went to school to be a psychologist.

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You're gonna see a lot of that throughout this course.

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A lot of my psychology training,

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because it's not all bad.

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You know, we are spirits that live in a body

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that possess a soul.

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And that soul is that psychological space.

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It's that heart space, that mind space,

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that will and emotion space.

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And it's the space that has all the junk in it.

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And our body listens to our soul space.

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And that's why we act out.

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That's why we feel anxious and depressed.

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That's why we have all kinds of issues.

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And then our spirit, once we know Jesus,

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it's the redeemed part of us.

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But we don't often follow after our spirit,

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the spirit following spirit.

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We're usually following after our soul, right?

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Making soulless decisions based on broken information.

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So anger, this is what I learned in my psychology training.

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And it makes sense.

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And it's been proven to be true over and over again.

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Anger is a secondary emotion,

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meaning it cannot exist without a primary emotion.

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And guess what the primary emotion is?

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Fear or hurt.

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Those are the primary emotions.

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And so when we show up in anger,

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it's because we're either afraid or we're hurting.

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So I want you to pay attention to what hurts you

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and what makes you afraid,

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because that's why you're showing up in anger, okay?

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So please individually keep track of your emotions

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during this four weeks.

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Please do not keep track of each other's emotions.

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Do not say, oh, oh, you're showing up in anger.

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Make sure you write that down.

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What are you afraid of right now?

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What are you hurting about?

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And I'm specifically talking to Carla.

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Because she's a coach

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and she's got to take her little coaching hat off

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in her marriage,

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because that doesn't belong on in her marriage.

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And Phyllis, you also know enough to know better.

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And so we got to let these gentlemen,

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we got to let them learn at their own pace.

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Grace, truth, and time is what causes breakthrough.

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Grace, which Jesus gave us all at the cross.

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Truth, which has to continue to be applied

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in order for us to finally realize it.

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It doesn't, it's not a one and done.

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And time, that's where the time comes in.

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Got to hear it probably over and over again

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before it sticks.

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And that's just the way it works.

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And that's the way it works for all of us.

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None of us got to where we are

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in any breakthrough overnight.

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Okay.

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What else do I want to tell you guys about this?

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So when I read through my course afterwards,

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and when I like started making the videos for the course,

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I realized that this is not for couples.

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It's just for married people.

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I wanted it to be for pre-married people

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and maybe even people that were dating seriously.

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But I realized that I,

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in order to make this really impactful for married people,

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I have to put some stuff in it that really reminds people

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of why they got together in the first place.

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You don't have to have it.

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This is not about having a terrible marriage.

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This is not a crisis intervention.

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Our work for couples is not a crisis intervention.

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There will be some people that are crashing out

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in their marriage, for sure, that get in this class.

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But it is, the whole purpose of it is to connect

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at a deeper supernatural level,

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to let each other into a deeper level of intimacy,

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specifically emotionally and mentally, not just physically.

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We're probably all having sex.

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That's not the point.

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The point is, is that there's an emotional

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and a spiritual and a mental place

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where we can let each other in and trust each other deeper.

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And then it's just unpacking or diffusing these bombs

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before they go off and blow up our marriage and destroy it.

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Because all of us have ticking time bombs inside of us.

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And that's what I teach in heart work, the regular,

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is that we all have stuff inside of us

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that's just waiting for a spark.

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And so David used to yell at me in the spirit

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because I couldn't hear him in the natural

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because I already thought I knew what was going on

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because I was running an old play.

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I was hearing a rerun from my mom, my ex-husband,

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whoever had hurt me before.

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And so he had to go out in the backyard.

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I didn't know he was doing this.

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And he would just say,

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God, you better get your daughter.

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She needs help.

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She's not listening.

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She can't hear me.

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I love her, but she thinks I'm doing something wrong

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to her and I'm not.

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And I need you to help her.

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I need you to get through to her.

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I need you to talk to her because she won't listen to me.

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She won't talk to me, you know?

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And he used to do that.

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And guess what?

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By the time he reconnected with me,

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maybe it was an hour later,

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maybe it was half a day later,

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I had humbled myself to hear

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because I do hear from God.

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And while he was talking to God about me,

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God was talking to me.

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And God was about the only.

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man that I trusted at the time, even though I know he's not a man y'all, but he has male pronouns.

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All right. Jeremy's having flashbacks of Simbas right now. Okay.

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You know, I'm funny. You're going to have fun, bro. Okay. So, um,

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So this whole course is about us really feeling safe to hear each other,

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to remember why we came together in the first place and to learn some tools that will help us

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have a deeper, more intimate connection, not just for ourselves, but for legacy. The fourth week of

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this program is all about legacy. Like why are we together? And what do we want to build together?

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What do we want to do together? And how can we start doing it now? Like, do we want to build a

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we want to go after some societal ill and go after it and be champions and change the world?

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Like, what does that look like for not just us, but our children? And I am going to do one more

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product. Um, probably very soon I'm going to release it. And that is heartwork for blended

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families. So that will be coming out as well. And I'm actually going to have my grown children be

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part of that and talk about, you know, so for kids that want to show up, they'll, they'll be coached

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by my 20 something years olds, um, from a place of what that was like when they were in blended

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family as kids. Right. And so it's going to be good. All right. So since we're going to go ahead

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and call it sort of a hiatus on coaching for the first week, I'm just going to really answer any

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questions about the format, any questions, Jim and Phyllis that you might have that I can just do

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hanging fruit on over, you know, anything that happened in week one that you didn't understand

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that you need more clarity on, but as far as coaching coaching, um, for week one, I'm going

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to go ahead and bump that to next Monday. And then David, David will be with us too then probably.

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So that'd be good. Okay. Okay. So who's got questions about, um, it's laid out in four

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you do one week at a time. You don't move ahead. In fact, for this very first go around, we're not

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going to even post the next week's material until after the coaching session. So you have the whole

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week to do it. It does have a lot of, uh, homework together because remember this is not hard work

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for individuals, hard work for couples. And so you do the reading together. There'll be some

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things that you think about on your own, but you'll come together and you'll do some activations

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and it's going to, it might make, you know, something might come out.

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I bet because I know what the material is. That's going to annoy one of you to each other.

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But all I can say is what I say for the regular hard work, don't shut down

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and you'll make it through. And if you do shut down and fall off, get back on.

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Okay. We do have one question cause we kind of kept questioning it.

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Um, while we were doing it was the, the week one homework is the step one. So circle,

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what, um, circle one that describes how you most often see your partner. So that was like how

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I'm viewing him or how I think he's viewing me. Well, you need to print out two of those and you

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both need two of them. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So yeah, he's your partner and you're his partner. Yeah.

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Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, okay. Well, the next question says through your eyes,

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how do, how do you see him through? Right. When I feel stressed, I tend to see you through a

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blank lens. So that one, you still use, I mean, whatever word we think the lens is. And that

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first, that circle one is how I'm seeing him kind of most of seeing my partner most of the time,

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or is it just like, because I feel like that could be, you know, uh, different depending on

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how I'm feeling. Are we, you know, getting along or are we not getting along? You know,

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then that's why it says the majority of the time. Okay. Yeah. It's just the majority of the time.

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How do I see them? Not, not, not, you know, I mean, it's not all the time. We can never say

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all you guys. And that's one thing you need to learn that we don't ever want to, we don't ever

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want to use the words always like you always, right. You never, you know, because that's those,

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those things are not true. And so that's why that is about the majority of the time. Cause what

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we're trying to get down to is what is your filter? Cause remember when you're seeing

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00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:03.260
your partner, you're not seeing them as they are. You're seeing

225
00:15:03.260 --> 00:15:09.680
them as you believe they are in your heart, right? Yeah. Heart

226
00:15:09.680 --> 00:15:13.240
filters. Remember heartwork? Yes. Yeah. And so that is what

227
00:15:13.240 --> 00:15:15.460
this is about. It's about clearing off the heart lens so

228
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we can see the person clearly. And so that's why it's important

229
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for you to take inventory of how do I see them most of the time?

230
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Do I see them? Do they do I see them as someone who's just

231
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withdrawn most of the time? Do I just see them as someone who's

232
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withdrawn from the relationship? Do I see them as someone who is,

233
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you know, present and attentive? You know, doesn't matter if

234
00:15:41.880 --> 00:15:44.620
every once in a while they fall off, they act out, they wild

235
00:15:44.620 --> 00:15:47.420
out, of course, we're all going to wild out sometimes we're all

236
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going to crash out sometimes. But the majority of the time,

237
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how do I see them? Do I see them as dependable, reliable? You

238
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know, that's what's important. And you might have something

239
00:15:58.900 --> 00:16:02.140
right down there that's not that fun for your partner to

240
00:16:02.140 --> 00:16:05.300
hear. But you guys, this isn't about criticizing each other.

241
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It's not about playing the blame game. It's about really hearing

242
00:16:09.300 --> 00:16:13.680
each other. Really hearing each other and we're going to do a

243
00:16:13.700 --> 00:16:17.820
communication exercise later in the heart work that has to do

244
00:16:18.360 --> 00:16:24.820
with us listening and understanding listening to

245
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understand. And then after we've listened to understand,

246
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then being able to give feedback because gentlemen, men have been

247
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created to kind of fix stuff. And so when your woman is

248
00:16:35.940 --> 00:16:38.760
talking, a lot of times you're immediately thinking about how

249
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you can fix this problem and make it go away. So we can all

250
00:16:41.520 --> 00:16:49.120
be happy again and move on. But most of the time, the feminine

251
00:16:49.300 --> 00:16:54.660
just wants to be understood and just wants to be if necessary,

252
00:16:54.660 --> 00:16:59.900
commiserated with for a moment. And so we have to listen to

253
00:17:00.020 --> 00:17:02.820
understand what is it that she wants from me? Why is she

254
00:17:02.820 --> 00:17:07.119
telling me this? And you may even ask her and I love I love

255
00:17:07.119 --> 00:17:10.400
direct communication. I'm a direct communicator. So I will

256
00:17:10.400 --> 00:17:13.400
tell David, I'm about to tell you something and I don't want

257
00:17:13.400 --> 00:17:17.480
you to fix it. I just want you to hear what I'm saying because

258
00:17:17.480 --> 00:17:21.579
I'm really pissed off right now. About it's usually about someone

259
00:17:21.579 --> 00:17:23.980
else, not even about him. It's usually about was something else

260
00:17:23.980 --> 00:17:27.680
that's going on. This is making me really mad. And I just need

261
00:17:27.680 --> 00:17:31.540
to vent. I want to rant. I want to tell you about this. And then

262
00:17:31.560 --> 00:17:34.020
after he's listened to understand what I'm going through

263
00:17:34.020 --> 00:17:37.700
and he's offered me some comfort, then I'm open to him

264
00:17:37.700 --> 00:17:41.940
fixing it. Because now he's listening to reveal, Hey, you

265
00:17:41.940 --> 00:17:44.700
know what, Jackie, I think you're the villain of the story.

266
00:17:44.740 --> 00:17:47.760
You have a bad attitude. And you know, you need to look at this

267
00:17:47.760 --> 00:17:51.060
differently, blah, blah, blah. Or Hey, you know, I think that we

268
00:17:51.180 --> 00:17:54.480
have boundaries with that, you know, with that organization,

269
00:17:54.480 --> 00:17:57.120
and we're not going to use them anymore, like whatever the

270
00:17:57.120 --> 00:18:04.220
business problem is. So we are definitely more able to respect

271
00:18:04.220 --> 00:18:09.300
each other's input. If the person has listened to

272
00:18:09.300 --> 00:18:14.000
understand first, because we all have wisdom to share. And how

273
00:18:14.000 --> 00:18:16.540
can you really even give anyone any wise counsel if you haven't

274
00:18:16.540 --> 00:18:24.320
fully heard out the problem? Right? Okay. And men seem to do

275
00:18:24.320 --> 00:18:27.920
this a little bit more than women do. Unless, of course,

276
00:18:27.920 --> 00:18:33.900
you're a coach, and then maybe not. And so it's going to be

277
00:18:33.900 --> 00:18:37.480
really important that we just start really listening to each

278
00:18:37.160 --> 00:18:43.340
other. And you know what, all of you have had people in your

279
00:18:43.340 --> 00:18:46.000
past that didn't bother to listen to you. And that makes

280
00:18:46.000 --> 00:18:49.280
you feel uncared for, whether it was a parent or a former

281
00:18:49.400 --> 00:18:52.420
spouse, all of you have experienced what it's like to

282
00:18:52.420 --> 00:18:58.160
just not be heard. Okay, we're gonna talk about self defense

283
00:18:58.660 --> 00:19:05.020
mechanisms this month. And we're going to really try to not go

284
00:19:05.100 --> 00:19:09.880
into our favorite ones. So if you'd like to crash out,

285
00:19:09.880 --> 00:19:16.760
withdraw, hide, flight, freeze, fawn, fight. No, we're gonna try

286
00:19:16.760 --> 00:19:23.040
our best to stay present. Okay. And if you start having trouble

287
00:19:23.040 --> 00:19:26.720
in the shared exercise, because you just start getting angry,

288
00:19:27.700 --> 00:19:33.140
then take a timeout. Remember, you're gonna go ask yourself,

289
00:19:33.280 --> 00:19:36.460
why am I mad? What am I afraid of? What am I hurting about? Why

290
00:19:36.460 --> 00:19:39.720
is this ticking me off so much? And then when you feel like you

291
00:19:39.720 --> 00:19:42.540
can come back to it, maybe it's the next day, maybe it's the day

292
00:19:42.540 --> 00:19:45.500
after the next day when you feel like you can come back and

293
00:19:45.500 --> 00:19:50.520
really just do the exercise together without taking it

294
00:19:50.400 --> 00:19:59.320
personally. That's when you do it. Okay. Because in week three,

295
00:19:59.320 --> 00:19:59.980
you're going to give

296
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:04.140
your person, your partner permission to really tell you

297
00:20:04.140 --> 00:20:05.940
things that they've never said before.

298
00:20:07.660 --> 00:20:09.700
Not just about you, but about themselves,

299
00:20:09.960 --> 00:20:12.960
things that they've just never felt a liberty just to share,

300
00:20:13.280 --> 00:20:15.160
things that they need to really just get off their chest.

301
00:20:15.540 --> 00:20:19.460
And so some of that stuff may be a little scary to you,

302
00:20:19.580 --> 00:20:23.220
especially if you've, you know, just been

303
00:20:27.020 --> 00:20:30.220
not really in a place where you can receive

304
00:20:30.220 --> 00:20:32.340
that type of feedback, cool?

305
00:20:33.040 --> 00:20:35.100
Okay, so just like the regular hard work,

306
00:20:35.100 --> 00:20:37.240
it's not gonna be easy, but it is gonna be worth it.

307
00:20:37.240 --> 00:20:40.180
And I know that by the end, when we get to week four,

308
00:20:40.240 --> 00:20:42.240
which is all about legacy, it's all about building.

309
00:20:42.700 --> 00:20:44.860
So this is about like kind of tearing out

310
00:20:44.920 --> 00:20:46.580
some rotten pieces of the foundation

311
00:20:46.800 --> 00:20:48.280
so that we can rebuild on it.

312
00:20:48.280 --> 00:20:50.340
When you get to week four, you get to talk about dreaming.

313
00:20:50.660 --> 00:20:51.820
In fact, week three and week four,

314
00:20:51.820 --> 00:20:53.000
we get to talk about dreaming.

315
00:20:53.420 --> 00:20:54.800
The first two weeks are a little rough,

316
00:20:54.900 --> 00:20:57.020
but then we start talking about some really fun

317
00:20:57.020 --> 00:20:58.860
and good stuff and what we wanna do together.

318
00:21:00.460 --> 00:21:02.000
And it's going to,

319
00:21:02.400 --> 00:21:04.940
I feel like this is gonna be transformational, cool?

320
00:21:07.420 --> 00:21:10.060
Okay, all right, does anybody have any questions?

321
00:21:11.440 --> 00:21:11.600
Go ahead, Ben.

322
00:21:13.980 --> 00:21:14.420
Okay.

323
00:21:17.200 --> 00:21:17.980
Ben, can you hear me?

324
00:21:18.660 --> 00:21:18.940
Yeah.

325
00:21:19.460 --> 00:21:22.540
I've kept one of the notes outside before,

326
00:21:22.600 --> 00:21:23.820
but I don't think you were able to hear me

327
00:21:23.820 --> 00:21:25.540
because the gopro mic was left.

328
00:21:25.840 --> 00:21:28.260
Oh yeah, you actually are breaking up really bad,

329
00:21:28.300 --> 00:21:29.380
but I can't hear you, go ahead.

330
00:21:30.460 --> 00:21:33.800
No, I was just wondering, do you use a lot of words?

331
00:21:36.680 --> 00:21:37.900
Like when you're communicating?

332
00:21:39.040 --> 00:21:39.680
Do I what?

333
00:21:41.960 --> 00:21:43.040
Can you hear me?

334
00:21:43.560 --> 00:21:45.880
You are breaking up, do I get a lot of what?

335
00:21:48.940 --> 00:21:51.340
Do you use a lot of words

336
00:21:52.540 --> 00:21:54.940
when you're explaining yourself?

337
00:21:58.660 --> 00:21:59.860
Like to...

338
00:21:59.860 --> 00:21:59.860


339
00:22:00.420 --> 00:22:03.460
No, Jackie, you know I talk, I can't stop talking.

340
00:22:03.600 --> 00:22:04.720
I use so many words.

341
00:22:04.960 --> 00:22:06.500
He's asking, do you do the same?

342
00:22:09.940 --> 00:22:12.400
I think women do use more words than men.

343
00:22:14.600 --> 00:22:18.140
But Carla, if you can work on simplifying

344
00:22:18.140 --> 00:22:19.220
your communication.

345
00:22:23.140 --> 00:22:25.320
Yes, that's what I've been trying to do.

346
00:22:27.120 --> 00:22:29.440
Yeah, because you have a lot of hats.

347
00:22:30.080 --> 00:22:33.600
You have a teacher hat, you have a coach hat.

348
00:22:34.100 --> 00:22:36.300
You went to enough therapy of your song

349
00:22:36.300 --> 00:22:38.540
that you have kind of your own, like you're a therapist.

350
00:22:38.840 --> 00:22:42.020
Like you're not one, but you play one on TV kind of thing.

351
00:22:42.020 --> 00:22:43.420
Like you have that hat.

352
00:22:43.720 --> 00:22:47.420
And so there's a lot of big concepts and big words

353
00:22:47.420 --> 00:22:51.060
and Phyllis and Carla both,

354
00:22:51.480 --> 00:22:53.160
you need to understand that your guys,

355
00:22:53.400 --> 00:22:55.560
neither one of them have been through the heart work,

356
00:22:55.640 --> 00:22:56.300
the regular one.

357
00:22:57.340 --> 00:22:59.960
And I guarantee you, Carla,

358
00:23:00.180 --> 00:23:04.500
Jeremy has not had the type of input

359
00:23:04.500 --> 00:23:06.700
that you have had for years and years and years.

360
00:23:06.860 --> 00:23:10.920
And so let's just not expect people to have a PhD

361
00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:14.320
in inner healing or whatever.

362
00:23:14.420 --> 00:23:15.960
And men are simple creatures.

363
00:23:16.520 --> 00:23:18.300
God created them that way.

364
00:23:18.320 --> 00:23:19.680
It doesn't mean that they're not smart.

365
00:23:19.760 --> 00:23:21.680
They're very smart, but they're also very simple.

366
00:23:22.880 --> 00:23:25.360
Keep it simple, sweetheart, okay?

367
00:23:25.740 --> 00:23:27.980
So if we want them to hear us,

368
00:23:28.120 --> 00:23:31.240
we all have to keep it simple

369
00:23:31.880 --> 00:23:33.400
and then take a breath

370
00:23:33.400 --> 00:23:35.600
and let them answer one question at a time

371
00:23:36.280 --> 00:23:43.060
instead of giving them a history of Confucius.

372
00:23:43.740 --> 00:23:46.040
Yeah, I just didn't know if that was.

373
00:23:46.560 --> 00:23:48.420
It's probably a female thing.

374
00:23:48.480 --> 00:23:48.880
Okay.

375
00:23:50.440 --> 00:23:51.400
Yeah, yeah.

376
00:23:51.700 --> 00:23:54.200
We kind of have the opposite going on.

377
00:23:54.880 --> 00:23:56.840
We kind of have the opposite thing going on.

378
00:23:57.600 --> 00:23:57.720
Oh yeah.

379
00:23:57.740 --> 00:23:58.800
Jim's the talker.

380
00:23:59.040 --> 00:24:00.260
Yeah, but he's a talker,

381
00:24:00.280 --> 00:24:01.660
but he's still his,

382
00:24:02.320 --> 00:24:04.060
like when he gets down to,

383
00:24:04.180 --> 00:24:05.980
you know, when he's telling me the whole thing

384
00:24:05.980 --> 00:24:07.100
and he gets it down to,

385
00:24:07.340 --> 00:24:08.860
if you would just do this,

386
00:24:10.100 --> 00:24:11.960
he fixes the problem,

387
00:24:12.500 --> 00:24:14.180
tells me what he wants, right?

388
00:24:14.200 --> 00:24:16.340
If you would just do this, it would be fine.

389
00:24:18.500 --> 00:24:20.220
So, you know, that's where,

390
00:24:20.380 --> 00:24:21.700
so the simple thing is there,

391
00:24:21.720 --> 00:24:23.780
but he is very, very smart

392
00:24:23.940 --> 00:24:26.220
and very kind of in tune,

393
00:24:26.620 --> 00:24:30.460
I think with his emotions,

394
00:24:30.460 --> 00:24:32.060
I think more so than I am.

395
00:24:33.320 --> 00:24:35.160
Okay, well, that's gonna be fun for you guys.

396
00:24:36.920 --> 00:24:37.880
That's gonna be fun.

397
00:24:38.400 --> 00:24:40.560
I've been married for a really long time.

398
00:24:42.120 --> 00:24:42.120


399
00:24:42.120 --> 00:24:45.840
Oh, see, so some other woman created what you have now.

400
00:24:49.860 --> 00:24:52.440
But that's gonna be a great little switcheroo for you.

401
00:24:53.660 --> 00:24:55.620
Yeah, it is a switcheroo.

402
00:24:56.120 --> 00:24:58.540
Phyllis, you're gonna learn to open up and share more.

403
00:24:58.620 --> 00:24:59.240
How about that?

404
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:02.240
Yeah, that's what I'm, that's what he wants.

405
00:25:03.560 --> 00:25:06.520
That's exactly what he wants.

406
00:25:06.520 --> 00:25:06.960
Yeah.

407
00:25:09.380 --> 00:25:12.500
So been working on it.

408
00:25:14.980 --> 00:25:16.380
Well, so this is good.

409
00:25:16.380 --> 00:25:18.340
Even though this is, even though it's hard work for couples,

410
00:25:18.340 --> 00:25:21.360
you are gonna probably get some hard work for yourself

411
00:25:21.360 --> 00:25:23.820
as far as like, why do I do this this way?

412
00:25:24.440 --> 00:25:24.720
Yeah.

413
00:25:24.720 --> 00:25:25.860
So that's gonna be good.

414
00:25:26.500 --> 00:25:26.880
Yeah.

415
00:25:32.520 --> 00:25:33.000
Yeah.

416
00:25:33.100 --> 00:25:33.580
Yeah.

417
00:25:33.580 --> 00:25:33.580


418
00:25:34.280 --> 00:25:35.840
So Carla for sure.

419
00:25:36.040 --> 00:25:38.320
And Megan will be in the same boat as you

420
00:25:38.320 --> 00:25:40.520
cause she's been to lots and lots of therapy as well.

421
00:25:40.540 --> 00:25:43.860
We just have to make sure that we just keep those hats off.

422
00:25:45.120 --> 00:25:45.600
Okay.

423
00:25:45.600 --> 00:25:47.260
We're just husbands and wives here.

424
00:25:47.760 --> 00:25:48.720
That's what we are.

425
00:25:49.140 --> 00:25:52.820
We're not trying to, you know, show the other person

426
00:25:52.820 --> 00:25:54.400
everything that we know about this.

427
00:25:54.420 --> 00:25:59.180
We're just trying to just show up, do the, do the content.

428
00:25:59.180 --> 00:26:03.600
And, and experience the closeness that it,

429
00:26:03.960 --> 00:26:07.440
that it should bring and the unity that it should bring.

430
00:26:07.960 --> 00:26:10.360
So you'll see a fun story in the,

431
00:26:10.720 --> 00:26:12.100
in the little ebook that I wrote,

432
00:26:12.220 --> 00:26:14.740
you'll see a fun story about David and I

433
00:26:15.440 --> 00:26:20.660
and a shag carpet and a lost, a lost Ruby.

434
00:26:22.640 --> 00:26:25.440
And yeah, it's, it's, it's a good story.

435
00:26:25.580 --> 00:26:27.100
So Carla and Jeremy will see it too.

436
00:26:27.100 --> 00:26:28.600
And you'll see the power of agreement

437
00:26:28.600 --> 00:26:31.200
and you'll see what God can do when we get on the same page.

438
00:26:32.940 --> 00:26:33.200
All right.

439
00:26:34.260 --> 00:26:34.660
Cool.

440
00:26:34.720 --> 00:26:35.080
All right.

441
00:26:35.280 --> 00:26:36.600
Does anyone have other questions?

442
00:26:39.940 --> 00:26:40.740
All right.

443
00:26:40.820 --> 00:26:42.720
So guys don't race too far ahead

444
00:26:42.720 --> 00:26:44.400
since we're going to do the coaching next week,

445
00:26:46.240 --> 00:26:47.520
but two is up.

446
00:26:47.720 --> 00:26:50.020
And if you want to take a sneak peek at you, you can,

447
00:26:50.680 --> 00:26:52.880
but you know, it sounds like you guys didn't do that.

448
00:26:52.880 --> 00:26:54.500
Didn't do that worksheet yet anyway.

449
00:26:54.500 --> 00:26:56.740
So you guys can get that stuff done and that'd be good.

450
00:26:56.740 --> 00:26:58.800
It's, we did it,

451
00:26:58.800 --> 00:27:02.160
but we weren't exactly sure if we had like the right,

452
00:27:02.440 --> 00:27:04.580
like the, got it here.

453
00:27:04.900 --> 00:27:07.980
You know, I think the sentence on when you're stressed,

454
00:27:07.980 --> 00:27:09.400
I think we got that one.

455
00:27:09.460 --> 00:27:11.740
It was that first part.

456
00:27:11.960 --> 00:27:15.000
Like, like, how do I see you the majority of the time?

457
00:27:15.120 --> 00:27:18.500
My answer will change because of that clarification.

458
00:27:19.420 --> 00:27:20.000
Okay.

459
00:27:20.000 --> 00:27:21.300
And so that's better.

460
00:27:21.460 --> 00:27:22.040
Yeah.

461
00:27:22.040 --> 00:27:23.100
But the rest of it we did.

462
00:27:23.220 --> 00:27:25.240
Did you guys do the activation too?

463
00:27:25.240 --> 00:27:25.740
Yeah.

464
00:27:25.940 --> 00:27:26.280
The huddle.

465
00:27:26.700 --> 00:27:27.160
Okay.

466
00:27:27.600 --> 00:27:28.060
Yeah.

467
00:27:28.880 --> 00:27:29.340
Awesome.

468
00:27:29.680 --> 00:27:31.760
Well, I can't wait to hear more about that

469
00:27:31.760 --> 00:27:32.980
and hear how that went.

470
00:27:32.980 --> 00:27:35.780
We'll have shared time since there's so few couples.

471
00:27:35.940 --> 00:27:37.420
You guys, if you're wondering how long

472
00:27:37.420 --> 00:27:38.940
the coaching sessions will be on Monday,

473
00:27:39.020 --> 00:27:40.780
they won't be longer than 75 minutes.

474
00:27:41.360 --> 00:27:41.820
Okay.

475
00:27:41.820 --> 00:27:43.800
And a lot of that will be shared time

476
00:27:44.020 --> 00:27:47.020
with you guys kind of sharing how the activation went.

477
00:27:47.240 --> 00:27:48.760
It's not going to be a,

478
00:27:48.960 --> 00:27:51.460
it's not going to be redundant reteaching of the,

479
00:27:51.520 --> 00:27:54.620
of the, of the material you guys have to read.

480
00:27:54.620 --> 00:27:56.660
You guys have to activate, you guys have to do.

481
00:27:57.020 --> 00:27:59.860
And then that's going to really just be more of a time

482
00:27:59.860 --> 00:28:02.540
where you can ask me questions, I can give you feedback

483
00:28:02.540 --> 00:28:05.060
and you guys can share your experience

484
00:28:05.060 --> 00:28:06.680
with that week's material.

485
00:28:07.300 --> 00:28:07.300


486
00:28:07.700 --> 00:28:08.060
Okay.

487
00:28:09.240 --> 00:28:09.560
Okay.

488
00:28:09.680 --> 00:28:10.020
All right.

489
00:28:10.140 --> 00:28:11.600
Look forward to seeing you guys next week.

490
00:28:11.640 --> 00:28:12.780
Everything will be on the calendar.

491
00:28:13.200 --> 00:28:13.700
See you soon.

492
00:28:13.740 --> 00:28:14.080
Bye.

493
00:28:14.300 --> 00:28:14.740
Okay.