Okay, so this is HeartWork. It is December 29th, the last session of 2025. Annette, kick us off.
Okay, thank you, Renee. It's good to be with you again. Hello, ladies. I hope you all had
a wonderful Christmas and a good time with your families and friends and just also maybe had a
chance to take a deep breath between now and then. It's been a big week, and sometimes family time
can be stressful. Sometimes people can feel lonely, but we are glad you're here tonight.
We want to welcome everybody. Whether you're new and this is your first time on, please let us know,
and if it's not and you're in the group regularly and have been with us, welcome back.
Just a reminder that if you haven't taken the opportunity to do your welcome post yet,
we really look forward to those. It's an opportunity to share a little more about yourself
and help us to get to know you a little bit better, so if you haven't done that and you've been here
for a little bit, pop in there and put something in, and if you're brand new, we'd love to hear
from you as well. I know it takes courage to turn on your camera or to make a post and put a picture
of yourself, but we always enjoy the opportunity to get to know you better, and I see many lovely
faces and names on tonight. We always like it if you can turn your camera on, whether your hair's
done like Renee or not. We still want to see you. We enjoy the interaction, and also Supernatural
Saturday. Was anybody on this Saturday? If you were able to listen, I was able to listen before
I went to work. Always so good. Such a blessing. If you weren't able to listen, catch it in the
replay. It's definitely worth your time, and then the other thing that is really the foundation
of the last year single are the prayer calls in the morning. Those really bring a sense of
community, camaraderie. You're able to pray with your sisters to get your day started,
so if you can come to that, remember to show up and start your day off with a bang
with the prayer calls. Okay, speaking of prayer, I'm going to pray, and we're going to get started.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for the opportunity to gather this evening
and to gather as your daughters and to be encouraged by your spirit and by your word.
I pray that you would speak to us tonight, that you would prepare hearts, that
seeds that are planted would be grown by you, that transformation would happen,
and you would guide by your Holy Spirit into truth and the things that you want to heal us
from, from our past, from lies, from trauma, that we can step out in freedom and forgiveness
and light, life, and encouragement into the communities around us and into our future
relationships with spirit mates, or even just those that were in community with friends and
family. Thank you for the work that you're doing in and through each one of us. Be with Renee
tonight as she speaks, and God, we pray that your Holy Spirit would just guide every word
and conversation. In your name I pray, amen. Oh, and you open your eyes and there's like people,
double the people. So good, thank you for that. The other reason why it's good to put your
camera on, you guys, is it's to let the world know that you deserve to be seen, and so many times,
you know, we see folks who feel like they're not getting picked, they're not getting the job,
they're not getting the promotion, they're not getting chosen by a man, and we look at their
Facebook profile, and it's like a picture of a cat, and they're always off camera, even on the
co-ed stuff, and so there is something about coming out of hiding, and you know, if you can't do it
with some girls here, it's sure going to be hard if you go to the next level of our program where
you're in a co-ed environment, and I always say show up camera ready for those, but right now,
while you still have the chicks, you get to come looking scrappy, and we're going to love on you
and see your glow anyway, and give you feedback and all that good stuff, so there's something
about that. About the prayer calls, too, you guys, if you are ever feeling discouraged or,
I don't know, just like weary, weary, that's the word I'm going to use. If you're feeling weary,
prayer times really help. I know plenty of people, they're like, they work full-time,
and so they listen by their earbuds, and maybe they can comment in the chat, but just like being
filled with that. There is a woman that I barely remember from the program, but she just tagged me
in a post that she was in our program two years ago.
And just got married and she said one of the things out of all of the teaching which helped change her and grow her so much
She said one of the things that you led in prayer
Was you had us pray instead of praying for our our spirit mate like he was out there in the future
You had us picture that we were in the bedroom or the bathroom getting ready and he was in the kitchen cooking a meal
So we were already praying as if he existed and she goes like that gave me just a mind shift
That he's already out there and I need to pray for him as if he already exists
and so you just never know and what can happen and if you don't make supernatural Saturdays because
So this is like me underscoring everything that Annette just said because it's like I want you to hear it. It's that powerful
What I love doing I'm a weenie. I'm always doing something Saturday morning
So I always forget to listen to supernatural Saturday
But I always listen to in replay and now that I do everything in seminary
I do everything at 1.5 speed like if you talk less than a 1.5 speed, you're too slow for me. God bless you
And
So I do that
But then when she says something I'm like, I gotta write that down and then I hit pause and I write it down
So it's like the best of both worlds
You get it at a pace that you can listen to and it kind of revs you up
But then you can always pause it and take notes
So I will hop off the bandwagon and I will say when we go into breakouts later
It is a must must must you need to come on camera for the breakouts
there is no way people are gonna want to open up and share their guts with you if they just see it says
so-and-so's iPhone
Like yeah, Chantella like I like seeing your name
But you're probably super cute and I'm much more likely to tell you something if I can see it
And I'm just her name is just appearing right on my thing. And so joy
I want to see the joy on your face. So all that I think so if you're gonna keep it off camera for now
I can take it. I'm a big girl
I'm gonna pretend that y'all are listening to me passionately and scribbling notes and it's amazing
But I really am gonna say that once you get into that breakout room
You're gonna be with only two other people
You really need to come on camera because not only that
Like people want to look you in the eye and there's something about sharing your story looking people in the eye
Again, it's it's all about being seen and being real. So there's that soapbox
I will hop off on it because tonight's topic is really good because we're talking about
what happens when our heart gets really broken at a very young age and
What happens to that persona the kind of person that we become?
Because of a broken heart as a child and I'm really gonna be pulling
I want to pull some highlights right from the book because if you've not been
Reading the book yet, and you've just been watching the videos
That I really want to highlight a few things because Jackie says it's so good that I don't want to try to paraphrase it
I've just I highlighted a few lines
And so the first thing that we kind of remember is that trauma doesn't just hurt us in the moment when it happens
So somewhere our most of us had our heart broken
We could have gotten our heart broken before we were five and we don't even know exactly the story behind it
It could have happened in our teens or it could have happened somewhere in our marriage
I don't know where your heart when your heart got broken
But chances are if you're in this program your heart got broken somewhere and something pretty awful happened that really hurt you and from that
That changed you it changes your chemistry when your heart gets broken. It just changes the chemistry
And so what happens is your identity changes a little bit in that and so there's the original
Identity or sometimes in therapy world we call it your original child
This is who God kind of created you to be crap happens
And then a survivor version of you has to emerge if you don't get the healing that you need
the problem is that survivor version of you while it helped you survive and
We celebrate that version of you that person isn't doing well today
Because that version that that version of you still believes the lies from that trauma and you found what I call
Medicators or ways to survive that so again
We don't shame that person because that person helped you survive the trauma
But now that person is not serving you anymore and we need to release that person
And so now I'm going to read some excerpts from the book
And so I'm gonna tell you it's right from chapter 6 of her book where she kind of talks about lies
and how it impacts your broken heart and
So it says this
We have to understand and believe that there is an entity that has that has some influence and some
Power not as much as we think it does to help feed the lies that go into our heart
This entity has no real power besides that we might allow it so we play a role
In the power. So if you feel like the enemy has a strong power and hook on your life
It's because you're letting him have that hook on your life
you actually have the power to declare him to be gone from your life and
Remember that the enemy is here to come steal and destroy you like those are some pretty like the scriptures pretty clear
The enemy is here to kill steal and destroy
Y'all like that's not just like he's not here to just weaken you make you a little bit less
He is here to kill us destroy us and disarm us. So he's a he's he's got a pretty strong attack
The good news is he is created and he is not the creator. And so we are bigger than him through Christ. All right
So he is after your true identity
So then she uses some words to describe the enemy Satan
But the one she pulls up that we don't hear so much is Beelzebub
so Beelzebub is another term for it and the name of that term is the
Lord of the flies which is kind of funny because anybody ever read Lord of the flies so Lord of the flies
I don't know about y'all, but we all think flies are gross. And did you ever notice flies like
Going after like mushy stuff soiled stuff dead things
Open flesh like flies will go after the flesh and so that is exactly what the enemy is trying to do
He will find your open wound and he will go in and attack and here's what flies do when they go in and attack
they actually
create they
Create whether you should call it. Ooh, they lay their eggs
So flies will lay their eggs in that wound so gross and then that's where these little eggs hatch
and
Larvae now have an unlimited food supply. And so this is kind of like what the enemy is trying to do to our heart
He fills it with a bunch of lies while there's a wound
So that we can start to operate from believe and we start to absorb
Those lies and you guys it's really no different than when somebody
Has a heart attack you have a heart attack a lot of times because of how you treat your heart
What is the food that you're putting in your body that impacts your physical heart?
Well, the same is true for our emotion and our spiritual
Beliefs like if we allow unhealthy thoughts and beliefs and lies to come into our heart
It's going to affect our heart in the same way bad food affects our heart. It just it just happens
we can't get around it and
So here's the thing they start out as little lies
So here's the little me Renee my trauma happened to me and here's the thing you guys sometimes trauma that happened to you
Wasn't anybody's fault. Sometimes it's not that you were beaten or abused
It could have been like I grew up in the hospital. Like I was born with a birth defect in my eyes
I had eight surgeries before I was 18 years old
And then I also had a tumor on my tongue another surgery. So my poor mother
I just didn't get the mumps or the measles or the flu
I got crap that put me in the hospital and really impacted. Am I gonna see am I gonna die? And so from that
trauma
Lie started to form I because I started to hear the phrase
Renee we have to go to another doctor to figure out what's wrong with you
Now, of course what they meant at the time was we can't figure out what this eye problem is
We can't figure out why your eyes aren't working together. Why you're falling down the stairs why your eyes turned in
So what they meant was we can't diagnose it. We can't figure it out, but I was two
I heard we have to find out what's wrong with you. And then the other thing I heard was
Don't cry be a good patient because my mom
Wanted to make sure that I got the best care that I could and she didn't she was just worried that if I was a
disruptive patient
That I wouldn't get the care that I needed that the doctors wouldn't be all in for me
So I also heard don't cry ever and you guys I'm
57 years old and I still have a hard time crying like my poor husband sobs at everything
He's like I'm gonna be the one crying at the wedding and you're not aren't is that and y'all it's kind of what happened
Okay, serious
Like I'm a really good public speaker and I could get a tear like I could start to cry and there's like something in me
That just stops and I don't even try to do it anymore
Like I'm still at 57 with all the heart healing really still working
So I'm trying to give you an example that these lies that start to go in there aren't always these really bad
Obvious lies like a lot of times people think oh, I'm sure I'm fat
I'm too tall like those the ones you think of but these are like these subtle lies that get planted
That start to redefine your identity as you go along
Hope that that's giving you kind of a good example of that
And so from that this heart is all getting messed up with these lies and so we kind
and start to get fragmented or different versions of ourselves.
Like, I don't know about y'all, but how many of them
you can relate to?
There's the Renee that shows up at work
that's different than the Renee that shows up with her family
that's different than the Renee that shows up with y'all.
Like, when I was running Hope Clinic, a nonprofit,
or when I was a coach, I was kind of like badass, bossy,
maybe a little bitchy, maybe.
But like, then fun Renee would go on vacation.
And people would be like, oh my gosh, who's this person?
I'm like, oh, that's fun Renee.
So I got really good at compartmentalizing
and being who people needed me to be
in different environments.
So that is a very fragmented.
So maybe you can kind of resonate with that.
You've been the mom.
You've been the wife.
You've been the daughter.
You've been the friend.
You've been all of these roles because you've
lost your true identity that can show up everywhere,
no matter what people think about you.
And so she pulls in this on this next page.
She's pulling up Proverbs 23.7.
For as a person thinks in his heart, so is he.
So it's clear.
What we think in our heart, what we believe,
what we have been pondering in our heart
is actually the person that we've become.
It just flows from that.
In fact, in Luke 6.45, Jesus says this.
A good person produces good things
from a treasure of a good heart.
And an evil person produces evil things
from the treasure of an evil heart.
What you say flows from what's in your heart.
But you guys, we can replace evil with broken, sad, hurt.
So a sad heart is going to have sad results.
A hurt heart is going to hurt other people.
You know how we always say hurt people hurt people?
So that's usually kind of where that's coming from,
right from that verse here.
And it says here, she also says this in this chapter.
We can never be more than what we believe in our hearts,
no matter how much we pretend to be something
else on the other side.
As our hearts become full, whatever is in there
spills out.
So we can't help it.
This is just the way that it goes.
It's the way our hearts were built.
These wrong thoughts are no longer just
staying in our hearts.
They are multiplying.
They spill out our mouth, and they spill out in our behavior.
So then she kind of talks about the process.
And I'm going to add one step in front of the process
because she starts with, first, we believe the lie.
But here's what we do before we believe the lie.
We listen to the lie.
We ponder the lie.
We munch on the lie.
So remember, the first thing that Eve
did wrong with the serpent is she listened to the lie.
And then she didn't just listen and reject it.
Because sometimes we can hear a lie and go, get behind me,
say, and that's just a lie from the pit of hell.
And I refuse to hear it.
So we all might listen for a moment.
But then we start to ponder.
And then once we ponder it, when we
let it come into our heart and give it space and time,
that's when we believe the lie.
So we don't usually just believe the lie
because somebody says it once.
We take it in.
We eat it.
We consume it.
So then we believe that lie.
And then once we believe the lie about ourselves,
we start to speak the lie.
And then once we speak it, we become the lie,
meaning that our behavior towards that
is going to kind of bring us in that direction.
I kind of like to say this.
When you are getting a driving test,
I grew up in the north, so I had to deal with icy roads.
So my dad taught me how to learn how to drive in ice.
When you start to lose control of the car,
how do you get the car back in control?
And what my dad suggested is the same thing
I've seen an all-state commercial say.
Like, when your car's spinning and you
start to swerve this way, they tell you
what you're supposed to do rather than overcorrect
the ceiling where you're supposed
to look back at the road, where you're supposed to be.
If you look back, your arms will follow,
and you will course correct.
And so that's what's supposed to happen here.
Wherever we're looking, wherever we believe,
whatever lie we believe, that's where
we're gonna send the car.
That's where you're gonna send your life.
It's like if you see a pothole in the road
and you keep staring at the pothole,
you're going to drive over the pothole.
It's just the way things kind of happen.
And so if you want to stay clear of the pothole,
you find the spot that's not the spot, the pothole,
and your car will take you there.
That's the same thing that we need to do
with our heart interaction.
So first, we listen to the lie, we ponder the lie,
we believe the lie, we speak the lie, we become the lie.
So now you might be asking, well, then I just not,
I just need to stop doing that.
But usually what you'll hear a lot,
Bethany will say this.
phrase to you more than you'll hear any other phrase is, what is the lie you believe? When
did you first believe it? Because if you don't figure out and go all the way back to when
the first lie happened, then you can start to unpack it. So I might believe this line
that I can't ever be sad, and I'm not allowed to cry. If I don't go all the way, now if
I go, I might think, well, girls aren't supposed to cry. It's a sign of weakness, right? I
might think crying is a sign of weakness. But because I went all the way back to when
I was two, four years old, I was able to go, well, I was told not to cry because of this
particular incident in the hospital. So here's the thing. Was my mom telling me that crying
was not feminine or crying was weakness? No, that is not at all what my mother was trying
to say. The lie that I heard was crying meant I wasn't going to get good care. But the truth
is a doctor can handle that. The truth is my mom was worried about something that really
wasn't true. So if you go all the way back to the beginning of a lie, you might find
out what the real lie is so you can combat it with the truth. I'm hoping that's kind
of making sense to y'all, but you guys will be able to ask us questions about that. But
I'm kind of hoping. So that's like the first thing that you want to do. All right. I think
that's all I want to read on this. So I'm not going to go back to her notes. So I really
wanted to unpack that section just because that was so important for us to kind of understand
as we go through. So here are some other verses where we have to remember. So usually what
happens with the lie is that we not just want to unpack the lie, but we have to figure out
what has become. So not only do I believe the lie, but who has Renee become? Like because
I believe this, this and this, you know, I believe that something was wrong with me.
I believed that I was broken. So then I started to put on a mask. I started to become an overachiever,
like you know, scholastically smart. I was the good kid. I was the nice kid. I never
argued with the teacher. I tried to be the, you know, the one to bring all my siblings
together. Like I was the peacemaker. So I started creating masks and versions of myself
because I believe the lie. So the one thing that we're going to want you to be thinking
about tonight is what are the lies that you're believing about yourself? Then the next thing
you want to think about is what are the masks that you've had to put on because you've believed
the lie? Does that make sense? Like who have you had to become because you've listened
to that lie? So who have you been pretending to be? Maybe you've only had one mask or you
might be a little OCD, ADD like me and you've got about 17 masks. Like it could be one mask.
It could be a lot of masks. We're all different. We all have had different trauma and different
childhood. And so sometimes that mask might be like you grew up super poor and you didn't
know if you're going to have food on the table. And so one of the masks that you've put on
is that you need to overachieve and you need to be able to make a lot of money and you
have to buy a lot of stuff because you have to prove to yourself and everybody else that
you can buy whatever you need and that you're never going to have a scarcity in your home
again and that money and stuff really matter and it's going to really help your identity.
I'm going to do just a little bit more unpacking of that. And so one of the things that we
want you to do is not only do we want you to start to unpack the lies that you're believing,
but to figure out what the masks are, we now need you to protect this little raw heart
that you've got, right? So here's your little heart, right? And we've realized we've got
all these lies and all these wounds. Here's what usually happens. What do we all do when
we say guard your heart? So scripture says you need to guard your heart. What do you
think it looks like sometimes when we do it ourselves? Right? This is what we think guard
your heart looks like. We think we built up like a steel trap wall. And that almost is
what happened to Pharaoh, right? Like God allowed his heart to be hardened, which is
really a way to mask his heart. It's like to hold it all off. The problem is if we,
if we wall off our heart, yes, it's going to protect us from the bad stuff and the lies,
but guess what? Then it stops us from receiving the good stuff too. Like we can't pick and
choose if you've put walls around your hearts, it can protect you from the bad stuff, but
the good stuff cannot get in. So I try to think of it like this. I try to think about
my heart. Instead of doing this, I kind of put out there. So everybody do this with me
unless you're driving. Here's your little heart. I want you to give it to God. That's
how you guard your heart. You keep giving your heart over to him. He will not mess it
up. He'll guard it. He will protect it. If you bring
unhealthy people into your life, the wrong job, the wrong food, he will take care of
it for you.
He will get rid of the bad stuff and he'll help draw in the good stuff.
So that's how I try to think about what guarding my heart looks like.
I try to not do this anymore.
I just try to say, it's yours.
My heart is yours.
I want to give it to you.
I want to trust it to you.
Okie dokie, because the thing is, you guys, our heart is like this muscle.
You've seen a beating heart, right?
It's like this soft muscly thing and it just does so much powerful stuff and it is like
a sponge.
So we have to be careful with what we do to it and we want to make sure that when we get
back out into the dating world, instead of giving, here's what we all do, right?
The minute cute hot guy shows up, we're like, oh, he said a few good things and he quoted
scripture and he goes to church and maybe he even like sits next to the pastor.
We're like, oh my gosh, you're amazing.
Here's my heart.
And he has to earn holding your heart.
Really you need to, in that courting stage, God still gets your heart.
He gets to earn and share in that.
He gets to earn that and he will slowly walk your way.
So we're going to teach you how in the next levels, how to slowly let a guy enter your
heart instead of us just going, boom, here.
Not that I was ever guilty of that, but I was.
It's all good.
Okay.
Let's see.
So here's some of the lies that you may have believed.
You are insignificant.
Insignificant mean you don't feel like you have any meaning, lack of worth, unimportant.
You don't matter.
You should be seen and not heard, right?
That's what women, women should be seen and not heard.
You're not enough.
You're too much.
Your opinions don't matter.
You're going to always have to ask for stuff.
If people really knew me, they wouldn't accept me, love me, or choose me.
I've added some other ones in here.
This is really a bummer.
Like you guys, I've reconciled this with my father in the Lord and he's now happy, healed,
and whole in heaven.
But he used to say things like, Kathy's the pretty one.
She does.
She's gorgeous.
She still looks like Jennifer Aniston.
I'm waiting for menopause to give her some weight and it's yet to happen.
And I'm the smart one.
So I was always told, Renee, you're the smart one.
She's the pretty one.
So I always grew up thinking, well, if Kathy's the smart one and I'm the, you know, or she's
the pretty one, I'm the smart one.
Then it must mean I'm ugly.
Now, my dad never said that, but that was the implied, but years later she goes, well,
you realize what that meant was I was the stupid one.
And I was like, oh, see, I always thought it was cooler to be the pretty one.
But she's like, no, it was not cooler to be the pretty one.
Like men just assumed I was stupid or they only like, whatever.
I try to have empathy for her, you know, but y'all, she's been divorced twice.
She's finally in love again.
And I actually think she's got a good man.
But it goes to show you being the pretty one doesn't always get you the guy or a healthy
guy.
So those are some that you've, or maybe the lie you've believed is you're so accomplished
and you're amazing because of all the stuff you do.
So you guys, that was the lie I started to believe because I believe the lie that there
was something wrong with me.
I started to become this overachiever, over performer.
And for up until four years ago, I was the president of a nonprofit.
I was big man on campus making good money, active in my church on the leadership team.
I mean, I thought I was all that in a bag of chips.
Like I really thought I was somebody for the kingdom.
And then I left that position to take some time off to go to seminary.
I make no money now, pretty much no money.
I'm a chaplain part time and it pays bub kiss.
I mean, I made more money being a babysitter.
Don't have the big title anymore.
Don't have the big paycheck.
My phone's not ringing as much and I'm not as well known in my town anymore.
And I don't get as many speaking engagements.
And I have really struggled with who am I?
Am I still valuable?
And God's been like, Renee, you were valuable because I sent my son for you and died for
you.
That's where your identity comes from, not all this stuff.
So when you think about the lies, one of the lies that you might be believing is you're
only amazing because of the things that you do.
And if you stop doing amazing things, you're going to stop being amazing.
So that might resonate with some of you.
Once we figure out what those lies, we then have to replace it with the truth.
And the truth is you are a daughter of the king.
The truth is because of the price that Christ paid for you, you get full inheritance rights,
not half, full inheritance rights.
Ephesians 1.1 says, in love, he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ
and according with his pleasure.
And then in Isaiah 43, since you
who are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you, I give people in exchange for you,
nations in exchange for your life.
And Luke 12, indeed, the very hairs on your head
are numbered, don't be afraid,
you are worth more than the sparrows.
And so, I hope that that is just starting
to chuggle your brain, and while you're thinking
about this topic, I'm gonna pass the baton back to Annette,
because she has been bravely willing to share something,
so this is what she's gonna share,
is anything where she's had an orphan mentality,
not really believing in that inheritance,
or a limiting belief in any area of her life,
where she might have been begging
versus knowing that she belongs.
So, I'm gonna pass it, you were prepared for this,
right, Annette?
Sure, I'm prepared.
Hey, and you know what?
If you don't wanna use that prompt,
feel free to tag onto the trauma, lies, or masquerade,
anything that resonated with you just now.
No, and actually, I go in, thank you, Renee,
but I actually go in to each session,
asking God what he wants me to share,
so that it's his words, not my words,
because something that I might say,
might have said five weeks ago,
would be different for the group that's hearing it tonight,
because we can't ever go back and recreate tonight,
and so everybody's here, we're listening,
for a reason, and God's gonna use it.
So, I try and do something fresh.
I try and find new, fresh problems,
and insights, and struggles to share.
So, there's always plenty.
Anyway, one of the things that I noticed,
that came to the surface tonight,
when I was asking Holy Spirit what to talk about,
was the word begging really hit me,
and for years, in my prayer life,
I felt like I was begging God to do what I wanted him to do.
Oh, please, oh, please, oh, please, I wanna get married,
or oh, please, oh, please, can I have this?
Really a begging mentality,
that I was going to have to perform,
or be good enough, or say the right things,
or serve long enough,
and if I didn't get what I had begged for,
then my assumption was, well, I didn't do something right,
I didn't earn it, I didn't say the right thing,
I didn't serve, I didn't give enough,
and when I was delivered of that mindset,
and learned and grew in my prayer life,
which I will say, the prayer calls from this program,
and being on those, and listening to women pray,
and pray from really a place of power and of victory,
because victory is already ours,
no matter what circumstances look like,
because of whose we are, and who we serve,
we come before him, we're righteous, we're holy,
we are dearly loved,
he even knows the number of hairs on our head,
and there's nothing that we can do,
that's going to make him love us more or less,
and that gives you a lot of confidence,
when you can come into agreement with those realizations,
and then when you're praying, realize,
you're praying and you're talking to somebody,
whose love for you, you cannot even fathom,
you can't put words to it,
we can't, he loves us more than we can imagine,
and so for me, a big shift happened,
when I came into just praying,
from a heart of gratitude and gratefulness,
for all that God has done, and has given me,
and even things that he hasn't given me yet,
and if he doesn't, I know that everything he does for me,
comes from a heart of love,
not of performance or have tos,
and so that has been really freeing to me,
to be able to just rest in that,
and pray from that space of victory,
and knowing that God wants to give me good gifts,
and he wants to provide for me,
he just needs the posture of my heart,
to be the heart that he's designed for me,
not a heart that trauma, or pain,
or resentment, or unforgiveness has shaped,
but that he has shaped,
and he continues to shape daily in my life,
it's a daily thing, abiding in Christ,
and so,
Those were the words that I had for you tonight that were my my experience with prayer and what God has really shown me of
Who I am in him and because of him and his sacrifice for me
So Renee now you can take it away again. Awesome
Okay. So before we go off to our breakout, so I'm gonna put three in a group
I'm gonna give you the prompt question in a second and please say in that group
What I do is I can tell if people join the group or not
So sometimes people are driving and they feel like I can't get in a breakout group. So if I see somebody alone and
Nobody else shows up. I am gonna move you to another group
So I'm not gonna but if people jump out and come back in here that I can't do that
So give it at least two minutes
I usually don't count the first couple of minutes towards your speaking time
Because I realize I'm trying to shuffle people in and some people get bumped out and they come back in and if you do get
Bumped out try to pay attention to who's in your room or the room number you have
So if you get bumped out and you come back in you can be like hey
I was in room two or I was with so-and-so and so-and-so. Can I get back in and I'll send you back in
But I do want to make sure that I hold space for any clarifying questions
Because sometimes I don't want you to go to a breakout room going what the heck did she mean by that and everyone's like
Oh
So was there anything I said that you're all like, okay
Can you explain that because I wasn't jive it so and I want to offer that
Okay. Well, it sounds like you guys already know what to do. So, let's see we have
Third is a c36
All my visions
I don't told you I had a really bad eye problem and late at night or at 31st about 32
37 3 what is it? What does it say? Oh, it's no. Sorry. I thought you said the time there's 34
There's 34 minus you and I that's 32
So it's about three
Per groups about 10 groups. Okay, then some are gonna have
Okay
For those of you that are watching it online
We have just started the recording back waiting for everybody to come on back
So as everyone is coming on back if you are watching this in replay my challenge to you to stay connected
So that question that we asked everybody which is what really resonated with you tonight?
What are some of the lies that you've been believing?
What are some of the masks that you've been wearing?
Feel free to put your answer to that into the chat and let the coaches respond
Let your other ladies in the community respond
And so if you're watching in replay and you're not responding in your app then and if you're not feeling connected
That's why that's the best way for you to get connected
We're gonna continue to let everybody come on in I
Hope and believe I forgot to give you guys the one minute warning
I just realized I'm like, oh my gosh, it's time to bring him back. I hope that your conversation was fruitful and
Now it's time for you guys to share
Whatever you want to share and just just be powerful. You don't need to give us the nitty-gritty
The details of what you shared stays with the group, right?
So what was shared in the group stays in the group unless you want to share it
So it's your story to share and I know it takes somebody super brave to go first and then all sudden more people want him
So who is my brave?
girl
That's gonna go first. Is it Glenna? I love that Glenna. You're up
Glenna you're muted
Oops, okay. There you go. I'm sorry
I started in this program in January and you know, it's taken me a while
but I'm almost finished with phase one, but I can honestly say that
It's been life-changing
and I had been in therapy after my divorce for about 10 years and I feel this last year that I
have
received more healing in one year than ten and
And because it's dealing with the heart issues and the revealing and I
Literally
God revealed things to me that happened to me when I was a child and I just kind of stuffed him down like oh
you know got through that just move on, you know, and I'm a
Real strong type a personality. I own
My own business I'm in construction so, you know, you got to be a tough woman to be in construction, right?
I'm laughing at that. But um, but
it's just I
Think I was on that
performance ladder for so long, and I always believed the lies that I wasn't good enough.
Through doing this heart work, and I've gone back and repeated chapters and parts of it,
and I printed the whole book out and highlighted it and wrote everything, and I have two journals
full of notes from all the sessions, and I go back and read them. But I just want to say thank
you. Thank you to Jackie and the whole community, but also anybody in this group. Just keep on
working through it. Don't give up. You are, God has made you uniquely special for who you are,
and I just want to just encourage everybody, and I haven't arrived. I'm still journeying,
going through the program, but thank you. Awesome. Hey, Glenna, okay, so you said,
that wasn't a typo. You said you've been here since January, so you've been with us for 12
months doing the heart work. I just wanted to make sure. Yes, yes, yes, yeah, yeah. I'll tell you what,
that's good to hear, because sometimes when we have somebody who's been in the program that long
that hasn't journeyed on, sometimes we're like, should we let them stay in the program? Like,
what's going on there? And I just love that you just validated that just some people are going
to go at the pace that they're going to go at, and we've never, you guys, we've never kicked
anybody out, but there have been times we're like, are they still getting something out of it? And so
I love that you've just continued to go at your pace, and you guys, the heart work, I said this
last week, the heart work never ends. That's why Annette said to you she was waiting for what the
Holy Spirit was going to reveal to her, because her answer today would have been different than
it was four weeks ago, and that's true for me too, and I would say both of us have now come
on the other side, and we're both married, but we can both tell you that life's not perfect,
our marriage isn't perfect, and all the lies that we used to believe doesn't just suddenly go poof,
and sometimes they might show up in a new way married. Right. And so thank you for being honest
about that, Glenna, and I'm just so happy to hear that, and as Tiffany said, your countenance looks
different. Y'all, when hearts get healed, the lies get lifted, and your true personality comes
through. So many people have been saying like, oh my gosh, Renee, you just glow now, and like,
I'd like to, you know, say it's water and good skin care, but, and it might be it, but it's also
that, you know, heart healing does that too. You just, you look different. Okay, Chrissy, you are up.
Unmute. Oh yeah, go ahead, girl. You got it. Okay. So first, when we were talking before, and I
mentioned this in the group, I thought I had hit enter, but I didn't when I typed into the chat.
I was just getting deja vu as you were talking, and then even when Annette was talking, and I was
like, have I, is this a replay? Have I already been here? But I think the thing that stuck out
with me was the compartmentalizing, but as we were talking in the group, and then reading some of
these comments here, there's the lies that I was believing, they have to do with rejection.
So that's why I compartmentalize, because I need to put on whatever mask is going to keep those
people around, like a dancing monkey. That's how I felt. I think, looking back on my life,
I think that's how I felt, like I'm just always, always performing and not the way I would like to.
So. Thank you for sharing that. Or do you feel like you can start to come into
agreement that these are lies and start to replace it with the truth? Like,
are you feeling some of that breakthrough beginning to happen?
Yes, for sure, because I had started this program in September, but really didn't do anything, like,
except for the prayer calls, I didn't do anything with most of it, just because my heart was so hard.
But now, yeah, I can feel it. I can feel the difference, and I can
catch it quicker. That's so good. You guys, we now have the luxury of chat GBT and Google,
even though I'm worried that Skynet is coming and Terminator is coming faster than I want it to.
It is really a good way for us to find out how to replace lies with the truth. So if you put in,
you can, like, what is the truth that the Bible says about not being valuable,
not being worthy, and scripture will actually come up and give you.
And so, now that the new year is going to be upon us, Brian and I are going to be taking
foods off the plate that we've been indulging in in the last few months.
And so, usually, if I'm taking out chocolate cake, I've got to replace it with something
else.
Like, I don't know, I've got to enjoy strawberries or something.
And so, we don't want to just, a lot of you are sharing what some of the lies are and
some of the things.
I want you to start to also do what the truth is.
Like, so, those are the lies, literally Google, what does God's truth say about those lies?
And start putting post-its of those truths, like, literally all over and start declaring
them out loud.
The enemy, remember, cannot read your mind.
So, you have been saying out loud and living those lies a long time, he has to know you
mean business.
So, you have to say out loud what the truth is.
Okay.
Eloise, you're next.
Okay.
So, Ms. Renee, or Mrs. Renee, so, you said over a week ago, when you were doing one of
the prayer calls, somebody said something, and I think I've already mentioned this before,
but you said, so, do you know, when's the first time that you experienced that scarcity?
And that word was like a word I'd never quite connected me to.
And so, I said to myself, from the womb, my mother didn't want me, I knew it from the
womb.
I got, you know, all kinds of freedom sessions and stuff like that.
And so, I started, my medication was numbing out.
And I'm still battling with that.
But I didn't realize for the longest that I was cutting out the crummy stuff, but I
was also cutting out the possibility of the good stuff, because I was just staying stuck.
And so, this is so exciting to me.
I've been in it May, a year ago, and so have struggled.
And I'm like, you know, numbed out and then would get back into it.
And you know, 2026, my word for the year is abundance, not scarcity.
And so, abundance in every way is coming.
And the lives that I've believed, like my mother told me when I was a teenager, she
said, I hope you never get married, so you don't have to go through the pain I've gone
through.
And I was like, what pain are you going through?
I mean, she never shared, she never, you know, but she didn't want me to date.
And that just hung over.
And even though I've had, you know, freedom sessions and all that stuff, I mean, this
heart work is just killer.
I'll tell you what, it's, I have cried out for this kind of help and breakthrough and
all that my whole life.
And when I connected on YouTube, and found Jackie, I was like, man, Lord, this is no
accident.
So I'm going ahead, I'm moving forward.
The enemy is such a liar.
And he's been found out and I am moving forward and those lies, I'm looking up chat GBT for
the truth.
And I'm going to put it on anything that standing up a door, a wall or whatever, you know, my
forehead, you know, it's time.
It's time.
I love it, girl.
It is.
You know, guys, I know the post, I think sounds so silly, but like, I did it for a long time.
And it's so funny because Mel Robbins has you do something else, which I think is really
funny.
She said, do this for like a week and see if you feel better about yourself.
In the mirror, give yourself a high five every morning and say something nice about yourself.
Like, oh my gosh, Renee, you look amazing.
Like give yourself a high five.
And you know, when you're single without kids, no one's like, you guys, I can go all morning
when I was single and nobody would talk to me.
Like, literally the first person I would talk to was in class or on my job.
And so like someone's got to pep yourself up in the morning.
And so I love the idea of post-its.
Remember, it's this idea of you guys looking at the thing.
It's like archery with a bullseye.
You're never going to hit the bullseye if you don't put your eye on the bullseye.
If you keep staring at where the arrow goes when you miss, you're never going to hit the
bullseye.
So you always have to.
to be looking towards the truth,
looking towards the right thing.
Because what we don't want you to do is unpack these lies
and then wallow in the lies.
We wanna unpack them to get past it.
So awesome.
Sarah, you are up.
Thank you.
We had an amazing group.
A couple of things that stood out to me was two of us,
we definitely identified with the pretender.
We talked about putting masks up for self-protection,
especially in past religious settings that we've been in.
So when I say religious, not, yeah, spirit-filled.
And then a couple of us also identified
with the puzzle side of things
and romantically having interactions with someone,
which was definitely more of either,
what would you call it, a trial,
obviously not a God set up,
it was like to get you up and above it.
And I think for me,
the biggest thing that really stood out was,
it's like, at least for me,
but the romantic setup and then one of the other ladies
is like, wow, God is protecting us
and we think we know what we want, but we actually don't.
And like this last guy I went through a trial with,
it was like, my body and heart knew
I didn't want anything to do with him,
but my mind was somewhere else.
And I was like, so humbled.
I just can't even, yeah.
I don't even know how to put words to it,
but yeah, that was kind of what came out
from our group discussion.
So good, so good.
So many good nuggets there.
I love, I didn't discuss the puzzle thing enough
and I apologize for that.
So I'm glad that you guys still were able
to go with that in the conversation.
And the other thing that you were talking about too,
like you guys, just to give you a heads up,
like as you go through,
like Jackie always says, hurt in relationship,
healed in relationship.
So some of the healing that you're gonna do
in the heart work, you can only do so much of it single.
And then it's not gonna be until you get
into your healthier relationships
or as you move your way through relationships,
you're gonna get more healing with each relationship.
So you don't end the heart work and meet your first guy
and bam, it all works.
Like it might, and amen, if that's what happens to you,
but you might find that God's gonna allow you
to go through a couple of different relationships
to kind of practice this new healing
and you're gonna go further each time.
And so, I mean, golly, the person I dated
about a year before Brian, my husband,
y'all, he was like probably the worst relationship
I ever had, really.
I mean, it was almost embarrassing how I as a leader
allowed myself to date such a bozo.
I mean, he looked like perfect man on campus,
checked all the boxes.
But because I was God defended and not Renee defended
and because I was able to not believe,
cause he started to nip at my lies,
cause he read my book,
learned about some of my early childhood trauma.
So he, it was like the enemy just gave him all the blanket,
like access to all the lies
and just start to get them triggered.
So this is all just practice.
And so some of you are gonna be like,
oh my gosh, I have to do heart work again
in this relationship.
Yeah, you will.
Like, it's all good.
Like new things might come up,
new revealing is gonna happen
and it's like peeling an onion.
So whenever like old triggers and old lies come back,
don't sit there and say,
why am I dealing with this lie again?
Go like, okay, God, what's the new thing you're showing me
that I can now receive the next layer of
and the next layer of.
Sarah, another Sarah.
Awesome, you are up.
You're still muted.
Okay, got it.
Oh, pressure, anxiety.
All right.
Thank you.
Nice to meet you, Renee.
Nice to have you taking Bethany's spot tonight
and getting a lot of good insight from you.
That's really interesting what you were mentioning
and like he was using that to manipulate you.
Is that what you were saying?
Because that's actually something
that I was talking about in my group.
And so I would love to hear how you dealt with that
because I am in currently something.
It's very regretful,
but I'm being manipulated left and right
and it's really hard and scary and I don't like it.
So when we were talking about the book,
I was like, oh my gosh,
I don't like it.
Well, I don't know.
I don't know the details of your story,
but if somebody is being unsafe and unhealthy,
you need to exit.
You need to safely exit.
I don't quite know how because we go to the same church
and I...
And I don't know if I'm manipulating him too.
I mean, I'm not trying to, but I'm,
I don't know if we're just like, if it's our, like,
I really don't know what, but I'm just like, I, yeah.
The biggest excuse you can give right now, Sarah,
is technically you're not supposed to be dating
while in the heart work.
That's our recommendation.
Right, and we're not.
We're not dating, that's true.
But I, like I said, I kind of like,
like about a year and a half ago,
I kind of was like inquiring about his,
like not his age directly,
but just kind of trying to see a little bit more about,
get to know a little bit more about him.
And, and then that door opened
and I haven't been able to close it.
And I think he feels rejected.
So he's just pulling out all the stops,
but I'm trying to like gracefully kind of like,
you know, step back,
but he keeps doing things to manipulate me.
And I keep feeding into that.
And so I was wondering like, how, how did you?
So sometimes when you have,
when you are not strong enough yourself,
you have to put up barriers to protect you,
whether that's block their email, block their phone number,
don't be alone with them in church settings,
have people that are going to be on your buddy's system.
And so that's what you,
you have to do what's going to help you feel safe.
And, and so don't give them that power over you.
Like block his phone number, block his email.
Those are the two easiest things to do right now.
And I, yeah, and I don't have those.
Go to a different church service,
sit with people that you trust,
visit another church for the next month if you have to.
Like, I hate to say it, you guys,
I've had to leave companies.
Like if I felt like I was not safe with somebody,
I had to leave.
And like with that person, like when we eventually,
like when I eventually ended it with him,
I literally changed my locks.
I've never changed my locks on anybody my entire life,
changed my locks.
So like changed with a passcode to get my building.
I told certain people.
And so I made sure,
I just made sure I was safe and never alone with that person.
And like when he wanted all his stuff back and all,
whatever, like my sister literally intervened
and like finished the last few conversations with him.
So saying you have somebody who it can protect you,
you need to let them speak to her, him.
And if it's within the church,
if he's doing this behavior in the church,
then you need to tell somebody on leadership in the church
so that he maintains his boundaries.
So you need somebody in authority to talk over to him
to put that boundary in place.
So those are just some of my very short term suggestions.
I really appreciate you sharing that though,
because that was really vulnerable.
I appreciate your feedback.
And I know it's a short feedback and a very big story.
So I'll be praying for you to feel empowered
to get the help you need
to get an army around you to protect you.
Thank you very much.
You bet, sweetie.
All right, who else would like to share?
Anybody else want to share?
Joy.
Yes, yeah.
So I'm sorry, my computer, this old computer,
the video could not turn on.
I'm so sorry.
So if you don't mind.
You're good, keep going, girl.
All right, thank you so much.
All right, so I was talking to my partner
in the back room about,
I think something related to me is about the puzzle.
Is that puzzle, you know what I mean, right?
So if my heart is in different state,
but I have to say something else, pretend.
It's all pretend.
So I'm kind of mixed up with the pretend and the puzzle.
And so the situation is that I'm in your church.
And this church is, they changed the location.
They moved to another location.
So I kind of left that church.
I went to another church, it's G church.
So in that church, I really, God used me a lot.
Now it seems that the old church want me back.
So I was kind of in between.
And so I don't, how to, I don't want to hurt people.
So I pretend, sometimes I feel so tired.
I go to two churches.
So, and the G church, I really, some area I flourish.
And, but also the old church is more matched
with my calling and destiny.
Even the pastor before hurt me and wounded me.
But now they more growing and more mature.
So, so I kind of,
kind of um do not know how to to handle this situation of course thank you for the sister
pray for me uh have a clarity and have god's grace if god want me temporary to be two churches
and then god's grace will cover me otherwise when so i have to choose one church and then i will
ask god to prepare people's heart if i'm leave if i stay with g church my old church also they
will have heart prepare that i will not coming back so basically i'm peacemaker person i love
i do not want to hurt anybody so i more like to have peace with people i don't want to hurt people
sometimes i may pretend sometimes i may even speak of wildlife so joy i'm gonna give you a
phrase to learn because this was my problem i don't like to hurt people's feelings right
so here's what a therapist taught me when we avoid hurting people we will cause more harm later
sometimes the harm is to them and sometimes the harm is to ourselves it's kind of like when you
have a toothache if you go to the dentist to fix the toothache is it going usually the dentist
will say this is going to hurt a little bit but i need to do it to fix the infection or fix the
problem and so the dentist knows he's going to hurt you for a little bit so he tries to warn you
give you a little novocaine and let you let you bear it because he wants to fix it if he doesn't
if you don't go to the dentist and you don't deal with that little bit of pain up front then it's
going to cause more harm later and that's what happens in this situation so what you might have
is sometimes when you're trying to juggle not hurting people's feelings chances are you're
going to hurt one of them or both of them more or you're going to get hurt in the process so
try to think about that you guys we can't stop hurt sometimes sometimes the hurt gives healing
sometimes there's healing in the hurt so sometimes when we try to and you guys know this as a parent
and i'm sure you have four kids i'm sure sometimes you had to let your kids hurt for them to get
healing and so the minute somebody said that to me renee every time you try to avoid her you're
going to cause more harm later that was a really so it was such a freeing thing for me um so i hope
that helps you joy i'm going to pray for you that you decide and don't decide any faster than you
have to like i've as a single person i've toggled to i i used to say this thing and it did not always
land well with everybody but i used to call myself the church whore because i used to go to a lot of
different churches i'm like i'm like a church whore i go to this women's ministry over here
this pastoral care thing over here i like this sermon over here and funny people found it really
funny and other people are like you're what and so like especially when you're single and you don't
have kids like you get to go to more than one church because like one might be one part of your
personal in the other part another part i mean even now as you know brian and i are trying to
figure out where our new church is i still like going back to the old church sometimes and so
it's okay so don't rush your decision don't make a decision or don't make a decision because you're
trying to hurt somebody you're trying to avoid hurting someone's feelings but not make a decision
so make the decision when the lord tells you what to do and just be gracious to yourself in the
meantime all right tiffany see y'all are learning so much about me in just a short amount of weeks
i'm telling you i'm jackie 2.0 all right tiffany you're next okay so what you said earlier about
the different personalities for the different situations are places that we've lost our true
identity and i feel like that was like a two by four like that's yes 110 so my question to you
is as you went through the heartwork because i look at it and go the lord's exposing all the
lies and all the different places and i shared even this morning like there's part of me that
doesn't even know who i am and i'm okay with that in the moment because i know he's revealing and
helping me find that with him right but since you've gone through the heartwork do you find
now that you are one person like with one identity instead of all the different
so in truth as you know what i kind of said to you guys is i feel like the lord in the last
four years has has stripped away every
So like, I kind of felt like I was getting, you know, at the end of my heart work, probably
three years ago, I felt like I was, I would say this, I was the same person on Sunday
that I was on Wednesday.
So I was getting more congruent.
The same Renee was showing up at church and at home and with my family.
So that part felt congruent.
I didn't feel like I had to be all things for all people anymore, but being congruent
and being the same person, you will lose people, right?
Because you have to now be true to yourself.
And so some people who liked the fake version of you are going to want you to go back to
the old person.
And so I lost some friends along the way.
I lost some business connections along the way, people at church, some family members.
So there is some fallout to becoming congruent.
But I feel like, you know how I just said to you guys earlier, there's always new layers
of revealing for healing.
So what I realized was even though I was becoming more congruent, what I did not realize was
how dependent I still was on what other people thought of me versus what God thought of me.
And I didn't know that until I left my job, stopped making the money, stopped getting
speaking gigs every week.
And a year later, I'm like, I'm nobody.
And isn't it ironic that I met Brian in a year that I thought I was nobody?
Do you know what I'm saying?
And because so for him, he feels like he got to meet Renee.
Not Hope Clinic Renee, not CEO, not speaker, not performer, like he got to meet me.
And so here I am four years after doing heartwork for the first time.
And it's like, God's going, like, I've dismantled every caricature.
And some of those things I think he's bringing back, Tiffany.
So I still am a good speaker and I still am a good teacher.
So those gifts aren't bad.
I was just, I needed them for all the wrong reasons.
So God's like, I'm going to slowly give the right ones back to you to shape your new identity,
which is going to be congruent, but it's going to be because you already trust who I say
you are.
So did that answer your question?
I hope that answered your question.
So just trust that it might happen in layers.
And I have one more question.
And I feel like probably there's many women that will probably resonate with this question.
There's a part of me that is scared to death to think of going to the second phase.
And I know I'm not even like, I'm not close.
I've got several weeks to go.
So I know the Lord's got a whole lot of work.
I'm giving him a lot of homework to do in me and that.
If we're continually being healed, how do, and it's now co-ed in those phases.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, let me help you out.
Phase two is not co-ed yet.
Phase two is not co-ed.
And here's the thing, y'all.
I used to leave phase two for the longest time and I couldn't get people to leave phase
two.
So here's what happens.
You get so comfortable in phase one and Annette could agree with this, right?
I don't want to leave.
But then you get to phase two and you're like, I don't want to leave.
I don't want to leave.
And so no one's going to, no one's going to make you do anything you don't want to do.
But I will tell you in phase two, there's new stuff for you to talk about.
We talk about the divine masculine and feminine.
We talk about how to date healthy.
I teach the online dating and the boundaries class, which it's like boundaries for life.
And so there's some really good new teachings in that.
And you start to practice it and you know, Jackie gives a dating challenge and people
freak out.
They're like, oh my gosh, like whatever.
She just wants you to get back out there and practice.
And so at each phase you get to like, there's a suggested length of time that you stay in
there.
But like, look, we didn't kick out, what's her name that's been here for like 11 months.
So no one's going to kick you out of phase one and no one's going to kick you out of
phase two.
You don't get co-ed until phase three.
And even then, you know, don't show up live or come with your camera off.
Like no one's going to make you turn on your camera.
So no one's going to make you do anything.
But all of us would say that in phase two and in phase three and me, I'm not, and technically
I'm a teacher now and I'm telling you, I'm still getting heart healing.
So it's not like it goes away.
You're just going to add another layer to it.
And as you practice it, some of it's just going to become second nature.
But then when you date, all of a sudden you might go, wow, there's a new revealing for
healing or wow, I need to go back to the forgiveness sheet.
And so it's not like you get rid of it.
You just start to add more layers to it.
It's a good thing.
I promise you, Tiffany, I will be.
Excited to see you over in phase two.
Can I add something to that, Renee?
Yes, please jump in.
I was gonna say, I understand what you're saying, Tiffany,
because I felt those same things with each,
you know, when you would progress through each of the phases
but in one of my quiet times,
it was like, Holy Spirit whispered,
but look what I've done here
and imagine what I'm going to do here.
It was like phase one gave me the hope and the assurance
that the same things he did in me in phase one,
he had good things for me in phase two as well.
But I needed, I needed to be willing to be brave
and show courage and step out of my comfort zone
that I've created into the next phase
because God had more for me there.
I had to be willing to take the step of faith
and trust him that he was gonna do the same thing
that he did for me in phase one,
he'll do for you in phase two.
It just looks different because he's growing you even more.
If that helps.
Both of y'all have helped tremendously.
Because we've been there, done that, bought the shirt.
Oh yeah, I mean, you know,
and we want that for you too.
I think that's the reason why we keep pouring back into you
because when you get on this side of it,
you want everybody to get the healing that we've had.
You want everybody to learn
how to have healthy relationships.
And that's what's cool in phase two,
you learn how to have healthy relationships.
And I found that having healthy relationships
wasn't just dating because if I was being codependent
or I was picking the narcissist,
y'all I did that with girlfriends too.
I did that with bosses too.
Like I had my third narcissist in a row as a female boss.
I'm like, okay, Renee, what's the pattern here?
What's going on?
And so you'll find that it'll impact
all of your relationships if you really lean into it.
Because we don't just have these unhealthy patterns
with the opposite sex.
It's been showing up in our other areas of life too.
And so it's gonna just change your life
for all of the better.
And so we want that freedom for y'all too.
So I'm excited.
Y'all, next week you're gonna have Carla and Annette
because I will be on my honeymoon.
See y'all, we got married in October,
but I was still in school.
So I was like, dude, if we go on our honeymoon now,
I'm taking my school books with me.
And he's like, yeah, let's not do that.
So I'm on semester break.
And I was just saying to Annette,
Brian and I have not been alone for seven days
without either schoolwork, homework,
his job or a family vacation.
Like, I don't know,
we're gonna be just staring at each other for seven days.
And then my poor, my mother, God bless her heart.
Cause you know, we've gotten a little fluffier
since we first met.
Y'all are not gonna be staring at each other
for seven days.
This is what she said.
She goes, do you have any clothes that are gonna fit?
What mother said?
Like, did you?
And so my girlfriend's in my seminary cohort,
she said, well, but you're gonna be both be naked
the whole time.
There should be no clothes.
And I was like, oh gosh.
So anyway, see, that's what happens in phase two.
We have sex talks.
I'm just saying, it's really fun.
Oh my gosh.
Y'all, this has been so much fun.
Annette, is there anything else?
I meant to call on you sooner.
Is there anything else that you wanted to share
that just stuck out from what the ladies were saying?
No, I jumped in with what I wanted,
what I felt important to add.
Thanks for checking though.
You bet.
So we do, you guys, it's after the mark
where Jackie will be kicking my butt for going this long.
So Joy, put your question in the chat
and one of the coaches, and it could be Annette,
will be happy to answer that question in the chat.
I'm gonna let Annette close us out though.
Oh, okay.
I did want to, even though I can't ask quickly
because of time, I take a lot of time.
Renee, was that you talking or was it?
No, that was Joy talking.
Are you saying, Joy,
that you can't put the question in the chat?
I'm just, we're just-
No, I'm just saying, instead of I just say it quickly,
it's a very short question.
At the time, I take a longer time.
Just how to discern what's the best and what's the good.
The best and the good.
Ooh.
That's way too big of a question to answer at the end.
How to determine between, that's going to be the thing that the Lord's going to work
on with you guys.
It is going to be really easy to walk away from everything that's bad and unhealthy.
What's going to be, what you're really going to have to exercise your muscle on is what's
the good versus the good good.
And we don't want you guys to just picking the good, we want you to go after the good
good.
And so Joy, I would just say, hang on, stay in the program, God will start to reveal that
to you.
That's my short answer because it's not a short answer, if that makes sense.
You bet, sweetie.
All right, Annette, I'm going to let you close out.
Okay.
Heavenly Father, thank you for your wisdom, your guidance and your direction tonight.
Thank you for transforming hearts.
And I pray that you would help each one of us to have a heart posture that is completely
and wholly surrendered to you, trusting in your divine protection and provision over
us.
Thank you for Renee's willingness to step in and cover why Bethany's gone.
I see you would bless each one of these ladies in the week ahead, bless Renee and Brian on
their honeymoon and bring them back safely and bring each of these ladies back next week.
And so we can continue to learn and grow in you, in your name I pray, amen.
Amen.
Bye y'all.
Have a good night.
Amen.
Thank you.
You too.
It was amazing.
Thank you so much.