Okay, friends, we have figured it out.
All right.
All right, we have figured it out.
It was a little pop-up window, but it was hidden behind the screen.
So that is why some things haven't been happening.
We've been hitting record on some sessions,
but that little pop-up has been hidden from us,
so we didn't go all the way to recording.
So welcome to Ladies Night.
It's Ladies Night.
We've got about 50 ladies.
We've doubled our ladies since just a couple of minutes ago.
And I was just talking about how I see a lot of OGs here tonight,
ladies that I have come to know and love over the course of this movement.
And I really want to encourage your hearts.
Everyone's hearts need to be encouraged,
but I specifically want to talk to some of these OGs right now.
We are seeing a lot of movement as far as success in our OG department.
And I had someone drop in my DMs the other day, and they were kind of upset.
They were upset because they felt like there was a false prophetic word
that was released as far as them meeting and marrying their person in less than a year.
And I understand that that is our branding.
And I will tell you, just to be fully transparent,
part of the reason why I'm not sad that we don't call our movement
Married in 12 Months or Less anymore is because while a lot of people were married,
and I don't mean from the time they met the person,
but I do mean from the time that they got exclusive with the person they were married within a 12-month period,
which, you know, that seems reasonable.
You know, exclusivity, you know, being with that person exclusively for a year before you say I do,
I think that's a pretty good timeline, especially if you're over 40.
But I do think that a lot of people really thought that it was like a situation where it has to happen.
It has to happen in 12 months.
I have to meet the person and be married before the calendar year is over.
And I feel like that name kind of ran its course.
And the reason why I say that is because God gave me that name.
I didn't come up with that.
That wasn't like a great branding idea that I had.
I was in a place of prayer after my mom passed away.
In fact, friends, the anniversary of this entire thing is in a couple weeks.
February, I think, 12th is when I got home from my mom's funeral.
My mom passed away on February 3rd.
And so February 3rd this year will be six years that my mom passed away.
2020 is when she passed.
And I got home from, we had the funeral right away.
She passed away.
We stayed in town in Florida.
We put together her memorial.
We had the memorial because she was cremated.
And then I came home to Austin.
I hadn't been home in Austin in quite some time because my mom was in the
ICU for about a month.
So I hadn't been home in Texas. And when I got back to my house,
you know, when you've been gone for a really long time.
And I got back to my house and I went up to my loft where my office was.
And you guys all over the walls in my office were all kinds of lists of
people's names from the heartwork.
I was doing a heart workshop when my mom,
When my mom passed away.
And I got the phone call that my mom had taken a turn for the worst and
that it was looking really bad. And then I need to come to Florida right
away.
So.
When I got back into my space and I was looking around at what I had been
building and what I had been doing to help people do, you know,
to help people to have their best life.
I just felt a little disillusioned.
I felt like, Hmm, have you ever felt like, Hey,
I don't want to do this.
And it wasn't that I don't want to do this,
but I also feel like something's missing.
Has anyone ever felt like that about whatever it is? It's not,
it's not like.
It's a, it's a both and it's not an either, or it's a both and situation.
So I sat down in my loft that morning.
And.
I was praying and I was just saying, you know, first of all,
I just want to tell you that I don't want to do this anymore.
I feel like I'm hopeless. I feel like there's something I'm missing.
I feel like there's something more.
I don't really want to do this in this context anymore.
And that's when God spoke to me.
It may have,
it might have well have been an audible voice friends because it was
that strong.
I don't know if you took this beautiful heart work,
inner healing protocol that I've given you.
it to me, gave it to me for myself first and foremost. And then I had been using it to help
transform so many people's lives, not single people, just people. Cause the heartwork is
for everyone. He said, what if you took this heartwork that you've been doing and you put
it together with your matchmaking gift? Cause remember friends, I had always been the matchmaker
and helped 15 or more of my friends get married, be in relationship, be successful in relationship.
And he said, what if you put those two things together and you called it married in 12 months
or less? He literally said that. And then he showed me what would happen if I said yes to
that, like in the spirit realm, I could see this huge tsunami wave of kingdom marriages.
And then he went on to say, I want my single sons and daughters married. I want them partnered.
It's going to be important for them to be partnered for what's coming.
He was forecasting what's what was coming. And what was coming was a need for partnership,
a need for one can put to flight a thousand, but two can put to flight 10,000 and then exponential
amounts of kingdom families and communities together because of what was coming down the road.
And so the forethought of God was, I want my, I want my people to get into process. I want them
to do their heartwork. I want them to unpack their emotional baggage. I want them to partner
with each other. And I want them to begin to build lineage and legacy because of, you know,
where this whole timeline of things are headed. And so I did say yes to God that day. And he told
me that it was going to explode from the very beginning and friends. I've been an entrepreneur
all my life. I've done a lot of different things to help and serve the people of God for the last
28 years and never has anything ever been. I don't want to call it easy because it's definitely been
emotionally toiling, mentally, physically toiling for the last, you know, almost six years now.
But it exploded as far as the popularity of it. And by January of 21, okay, this is March of 20.
By January of 21, we had our first wedding, our very first wedding nine months later. And so
incredible results. And of course, you know, that it's never stopped, but all of you that are OGs,
all of you that came in that were early adopters. I do believe that there have been some things,
some of you weren't fully divorced. Some of you still aren't fully divorced. You OGs,
you're being held hostage by, you know, men and women that will not allow you to have that
divorce decree. So you're not single technically, and you're not able to get remarried. And I believe
26 is going to be a year of breakthrough for you. I believe that those of you that have been being
held back by caring for elderly parents or special needs children, or there's just all
different types of things, addictions that you fully haven't gotten over health issues that you
fully haven't been able to get past. Those are the things that have been keeping you single,
even though you've been here and you've been really just allowing God to work in your heart
and to prepare you for this love story that I believe not only does he still have it for you,
but I believe that it's eminent. And so I wasn't sad to let go of that very first name that God
gave us, by the way, we lost that in our first business partnership. It was stolen from us
in a way. But at the same time, immediately, God was like, I want you to rebrand this to last year
single. And the reason why it was branded last year single is because so many people had come
to me. And after being infused with the supernatural hope that we carry that I carry in
this movement, they would say things like, this is my last year single. I just know this is my last
year single. I'm going to do what I need to do because I'm going to make it my last year single.
And so that's where that name came from in case you never heard that story and how that shifted.
And that was in 2023. And so for the last three years, it's been called that, but here's the
thing, friends. It's not a personal prophetic word. It's an invitation. So when that person
showed up in my DMS mad because they hadn't been successful in under 12 months, all I could say was
thanks for showing up. Thanks for letting me know. I'm sorry that you feel offended or you feel
like, you know, false promises were given to you. But at the same time, I'm not the matchmaker,
not, I not, not, you know fully, right. I'm just, I'm just a vessel of the Lord.
And so there are people that they want success in whatever area of their lives,
but they're not willing to do what they need to do to have it.
I don't really know this person. Well, that showed up in my DMS, but I know I could just
see from their profile, a few things that immediately would need to change. I can see
how they're sabotaging themselves. Does that make sense? I can already see how they're sabotaging
themselves. First of all, they live in a place where singles go to die. Literally.
I have been dealing with
city for a long time. And very, very few success stories have happened there because it's a very,
very, uh, saturated place with Christian singles. And at the same time, there's just a lot of bad
theology around the Christian singles in this city that would keep them from being able to
really fully, you know, partner with each other. It's ridiculous. There should be like popcorn
popping marriages happening in that place, but the very opposite is happening.
I think I've only had maybe four success stories, even though I've had at least a hundred students
from that area. And so it's really important that we remember that there are some things that we
have to do in faith. There are some things that we have to step out on, um, in order to have
success. The onus is not on me. The onus is on God. So don't put it on me because the onus is
on God and you together. But I do believe that there's corporate times of breakthrough. I do
believe the siege is over. And I do believe that we have stepped into a time when some of the people
that have been here, the longest are starting to have the most phenomenal love stories. And so I
hope you feel like it was worth the wait, because I certainly feel like it was, uh, in my, in my
estimation, looking at it from the outside, looking in, um, some really crazy and amazing things are
happening for some of our first students that are still left behind here. And there's not that many
of them. There's just a few dozen of them, but still, of course I want to see them have success.
And I really want to, um, I really want to hold space with you guys for that. All right. So I
didn't want to get off on all that, but I definitely want you to know that it's not a personal prophetic
word, but it is an invitation, right? It is an invitation to make it your last year single.
And I do believe that everyone who wants a love story can have one. And otherwise I wouldn't be
here and I wouldn't do what I'm doing. I would not be doing what I'm doing. All right. You guys
ready to have some fun, have some girls night. Let's have some girls night. Now it's a hybrid of,
we can talk about anything you want, but we can also talk about dating because there's no men
here. And that's the whole purpose. The purpose is that you would be able to open up. You would
be able to talk about what's on your heart, what you want to talk about. And we could also just
talk about girl things. We can talk about vaginas. If we need to, we can talk about hormones. We can
talk about sex. We can talk about dating over 40. Anybody need to talk about that? I was just making,
I'm making some new content for my Instagram. So if you don't follow me there, please follow
me there because I'm all the gloves are off ladies. I will tell you one thing that the Lord
said to me, he said, while we do have a co-ed community he really wants me to make sure that
I'm not holding back to protect precious male egos.
It makes it kind of, it makes it kind of hard for me too, because I want to be a straight shooter.
I am a straight shooter, but I feel like I'm tiptoeing on the eggshells of men's egos,
but I'm not going to be doing that over on Instagram. So if you want me to shoot straight,
then make sure that you see it over there. But I I'm about to release a video about how dating
over 40, the rules are different. The rules are different. And I'll just tell you over 40 includes
over 60, Jane includes over 60. If you do the math, if you're 60, that means you're over 40.
And so it's about at 40 years old, where I believe the rules really change.
And that has to do with potential. Everybody has potential you guys, but at 40 plus, we're no longer
looking for a man's potential of who he could be. Now we're paying attention of who he has chosen to
be. Do you hear me? And same goes for you, who you've chosen to be as well. But we're talking
about men right now. It's not about who he could become. It's who, who has he chosen to become?
And I'm just going to tell you one group of men that you really need to watch out for
are is the group of men that has made it to their late forties fifties and beyond. And they have
never made a commitment. They have never made a commitment. They have never been married. They
have never pulled the trigger. I know that you have this fantasy that you're going to be the
one that causes them to commit, but they're not a late bloomer y'all. They are intentionally avoidant
of commitment. And there are men that are ready. Now, oftentimes these men that haven't committed,
they're kind of, because they're Peter pans, they're sometimes handsome and they have some
other things going for them. And they're what women are sort of drawn to, especially women that
have fixer issues that want to fix. Um, and the, and their counterparts, the ones that have done
the work and the ones that are ready to commit, they may not be as shiny as these guys, right?
They may have a few tire tracks on their
back. They may be a little shorter than you prefer. They may be a little uglier than you prefer,
um, but they're solid. They've done the work. They know what it means to commit. I'd rather
see you marry a guy that has been divorced maybe even twice, but has learned his lesson
and his fruit shows that he's learned his lesson. And maybe he has a couple of kids
that marry some bachelor, some lifelong bachelor in his fifties who just has never found the one.
No, no. Okay. Unless he's been in a coma and he's just now waking up. The answer is no.
And what women will do is they'll over-romanticize it. They'll over-spiritualize it. And you guys,
we cannot do that. You got, you've got to look at what you're dealing with here.
Stop spiritualizing and stop romanticizing it. If dating is always an audition for a job,
and it is, this man has been avoiding that job for 20 plus years of his life
because he doesn't want the job. Right? So stop putting all of your hope and all of your dreams
and all of your fantasy on that. You've got to deal with what's real. He's not a late bloomer.
He doesn't want to get married. Get out of here. David came and brought me,
he came and brought me. Oh, you guys, did you pick this cup on purpose?
Why? D for you, David. Oh, Dorman. Okay. But this, this cup is a Disney cup and it's D for Disney,
but my mom worked at Disney for 27 years. And so with this being the anniversary week of her going
to heaven, I just feel like this is a little God wink. Well, God wink Diana Disney. Okay.
All right, you guys, I just wanted to get that off my chest. Let's talk. I know that someone
asked something about estrogen. Let me go back here and look. And you guys, I am not a doctor.
Okay. I know I play one on TV, but I'm not a doctor. Okay. And so everything that I say is
just stuff that I have figured out over the course of time. That works for me. It may not work for
you. So please do your own research, get your own voices in your life that are working with you in
proximity and in person. What works for me may not work for you. Okay. All right, Jackie, what
is the type of estrogen cream you suggested for older ladies? Okay. The only cream that I use
it's estrogen. The only cream I do have an estrogen patch, which is hormone replacement,
and it's a bio-identical patch made out of like yams or something. Um, but the cream that I use
is specifically for inside of your vagina. Okay. There's a little applicator and you just push it
up in there. Mine is every day. I know other people have some that you only use once a week,
just depends on what your functional or your hormone replacement person is going to subscribe,
prescribe for you. But it is to, it is to the tissues. Okay. The tissues in your, in your
vagina, they begin to thin as you lose hormones, they begin to thin. And so as they thin, they get
really weak. It can cause bladder issues, which is what I was having. It can cause, um, some people
get like chronic UTIs. I wasn't getting that, but I was getting like, um, it's called interstitial
cystitis where it's like irritable bladder syndrome, where I was just having pain all the
time, feeling like I had to go to the bathroom, but I didn't. And I also didn't have an infection
because you know, sometimes bladder infections feel like that as well. So when I use that,
it gets better. And also ladies, for most people who use that, it also is going to improve sexual
function. It's going to improve feeling. It's going to improve moisture. It's going to improve,
um, just everything a little bit goes a long way and it's really inexpensive. And so I suggest
all of you that are planning on all of you that are, uh, in the end of perimenopause
or menopause. So let's say 45 and up, y'all need to be on this. Okay. It's not systemic.
It doesn't get in your blood system. It doesn't affect your overall estrogen blood level.
It only is topical and it's only in that area that it's activated. But if you plan on having
intercourse in the future, you need it. Okay. Cause when I tell you that if you don't use it,
you start to lose it. And even if you do use it, cause I'm married, I've been married for 20 years,
you start to lose it. So you got to use this so you don't lose it. Okay. Um, and I think that
there are other things you can do as well. Um, but none of it's going to replace the estrogen
and repair the tissue. Like you can put coconut oil up.
There, you can do all kinds of stuff.
There's all kinds of like crunchy friends of mine that do all kinds of
different things for moisture issues.
But if you really want to repair, you know, your sexual function, your
feeling, your ability to have an orgasm, you're going to need the estrogen.
All right.
Okay.
And trust me, you're going to want to have an orgasm.
I really just feel like you will.
So, uh, you will, I promise you're going to want that.
You're going to want the rewards of intimacy.
And that's one of the rewards of intimacy.
You're going to want that.
Okay.
So, okay.
Gynecologist next week.
It's estradiol is the type of estrogen that is topical for your Vajayjay estradiol.
All right.
Thank you, Melissa.
I appreciate that.
Yes.
Popcorn.
Colonel Cheryl.
You remember, I love it.
We can, we guys, we can address perimenopause.
Let's address perimenopause and dating.
That's what Jess, Jess, Jessenia.
I feel like I said that, right?
Jessenia wants to talk about, first of all, you guys, you don't have a lot of
patients when you get into perimenopause.
It affects everyone differently, but most, most times it does affect your mood.
And so you may have less tolerance.
Can we talk about that?
You may have less tolerance for shenanigans.
You may have less tolerance for anything.
And I'm just going to listen.
I'm going to go on record as saying, and you heard it here.
I don't care what I may have said in the past.
I'm going to tell you right now, if men over 40 do not know what they want and
they're not doing the work, you cannot partner with them now for all of you
ladies that are still in your twenties and thirties.
Okay.
We can be generous there.
They're still trying to work it out and figure it out.
And you know, this generation is, is a little bit failure to launch.
They've, they've increased adolescence to 36 years old.
So I'm like, Oh my God, what are we doing?
Okay.
So, but I do know that if he's over 40 years old, if he's been alive on this
earth for 40 years and he's not doing the work, then it doesn't mean that he'll
never do the work and it doesn't mean that someone in the future may not
benefit by partnering with him.
But right now in present time, he's not ready.
He's not ready.
And so your number one non-negotiable going into 2026 should be, are they ready?
Are they marriage minded?
It shouldn't be how tall they are.
It shouldn't be there.
It shouldn't be any of that.
It should not be whether or not they are your type or whether or not you like
the way they look historically.
Now, keep in mind if he's ready, it means he also has good hygiene.
It also means he has his finances in order.
And of course you guys, there are one offs.
There are exceptions where someone has gone through something bad.
I have really good friends that are really good people that just went through a
horrible time in their business because 25 was really hard on businesses.
And so if you meet him at the end of that, you need to actually look at
the long-term fruit in his life.
Not the short term.
If he's going through a financial weird spot right now, like my
husband was when I met him, but he has a history of being stable.
Then let's go with the history.
We're not going to go with the one off.
Okay.
But if his entire life is just with him all over the place, never committing to
jobs, never being responsible, never stepping up, you got your answer.
You got your answer.
And we are not going to partner with men just to have someone to partner
with that are not partners.
Cause I'm going to say this very, very clearly.
I made a different video today.
The one I was talking about, about dating over 40, I'll
probably release that tomorrow.
But I made a different video today about passivity and men.
And I want to say this, you guys, I don't want this to turn into a somber night.
I really want it to be a fun night where we can talk about anything and
everything we want to talk about.
But I believe with all of my heart, I could be wrong.
I could be wrong.
I don't have a big ego.
I could be wrong.
And God, you can correct me and you can write, you can write my thinking, but I
believe with all my heart that if my mom had not been married to the man she was
married to for 30 something years, she would still be alive.
I believe she would still be alive.
I believe the dynamics of that relationship killed her.
And so friends, violent men, they murder women.
They beat women.
They stab them.
They shoot them.
They do all kinds of things.
They.
make them violent men do violent things,
but passive men also kill women.
I need you to hear me when I say this.
When you partner with a passive man and he may seem nice
and he may seem kind
and he may not seem threatening in any way.
And this is a lot of times
why women partner with passive men.
This is why my mom partnered with a passive man
because the two husbands she had
before this husband were violent.
They were scary.
They were violent.
They were addicts.
They were cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.
And so he seemed safe because he was just like easygoing
and laid back and low key and the things.
The problem is, is that when she partnered with him,
he actually never did another thing.
He didn't.
He was a rich guy and he retired at like 40 something years
old, 42 years old.
He retired.
He sold his company and he retired.
Problem is, is that he really wasn't good with investing
and he invested all the money he made
from the sale of his company into the stock market.
And remember when the stock market crashed in the eighties?
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
He lost everything.
And guess who really never ever worked another day
in his life?
That guy.
Now I love him and I forgive him.
My mom didn't have to stay partnered with him.
And I can see all throughout her life
because you know, her and I weren't close
and I pretty much have lived apart from her
since the time I was 14 years old
with just a few stints back in her house
and then out again.
I can see how many times she was actually
considering leaving.
I can see it.
But she never did.
She didn't.
So she just instead just allowed her nervous system
in her body to be under high, high, high, high, high levels
of stress for 30 something years.
Do you hear me?
Because there's nothing more stressful
than having to show up and do the work of two grown people,
the emotional work, the mental work, the spiritual work,
possibly the financial work.
There's nothing worse than that.
So please friends, I want you to consider passivity
the same as violence.
Hopefully none of you in this room tonight
would marry a wife beater,
but a toxically passive man can kill you just the same.
So please, friends, I want you to consider
the same as violence and it's even easier
for it to break down your body, cause auto-immune.
Did you guys know that women who are imbalanced
in marriage, women that are not partnered well,
married women, they actually live the least amount of time
with anybody else.
Did you know that that's scientific?
Men, married men live the longest of the men group.
Married men live longer than single men
and single women live longer than married women
that are not married well.
And I feel like I just want to sound the alarm for women
because I feel like people think that there's a scarcity
in the way that you're going to stay away
from partnering with the, you know, the,
he seems nice enough,
but from the very first moment that you met him,
he has never done anything.
He's let you do everything.
He's fully comfortable letting you do
all the heavy lifting.
That's your first sign that this is going to be bad news.
Just cause he's not yelling at you or cussing you,
just because he's nice, just because, you know,
he does show up to the dates that you plan,
just because he gives you a compliment or two,
you know, just because whatever you fill in the blank
does not mean that he's partner material.
And if we have a scarcity mentality,
and we believe that the only men out there
that are safe men are passive men,
then we are going to marry them.
And I believe that's part of the reason
why mom didn't leave him.
She didn't want to be three times divorced.
I'm sure that was part of it.
She was ashamed.
And she also, I mean, at some level,
probably felt responsible for him.
When I tell you that you start feeling like
you are these men's mother,
and what kind of mother abandons her child, right?
They're not our children.
Anyway, there's not a scarcity, friends.
There are men, there are men who can be leaders.
They may not have had a lot of opportunity to be leaders,
but you're going to see it right from the beginning
that they're willing to.
partner with you, not just willing to allow you to curate their life.
All right. All right. That's all the seriousness for tonight. Hopefully you're taking that in
you're writing it down. You're asking yourself how it, how it, uh, applies to you in your life.
Low effort, same category, low effort might as well be no effort. Seriously, friends,
the time that the man should be the most infatuated with you and should be putting in the
most effort of your entire relationship is during the, is during the dating phase.
This is when they should be the most excited about you. Yeah. Things can get a little ho-hum
in marriage and that's when you just kind of work together to, you know, make it happen.
But in the dating phase, a man who is not excited about you, a man who is not showing initiative,
a man who is not, you know, I hate to use the word pursuing, but there we have it. You is,
it's not necessarily even that he doesn't like you. It's that he is a passive man
and you can blame it on whatever you want. His mom and dad, his upbringing,
he has low testosterone. I've heard it all. We're done making excuses for this
fricking go get a shot of tea, bro, man up. We're done. We're not doing it anymore.
And if you have been dating toxically passive men, I really want to encourage you not to,
all right. Your health could be at stake. Literally. All right.
All right.
Sarah wants to know how does that work when you're a more organized scheduler than he is,
but still initiates and is a leader. It's not about scheduling. It's not about gifts.
Okay. It's about initiation. It's about him initiating. It's about him showing you that he
can lead. Who cares if you're an organizer? Who cares if you're a scheduler? That's not what this
is about. And a lot of women have become control freaks because they have been put in the driver's
seat way too many times by this type of dynamic. Cause I'm just going to tell you right now,
I was forced to face this and people were like, Hey, you know, just let it fall apart.
Don't do his work for him. Just let it fall apart.
The problem is, is that I can't let the boat fall apart. Cause I'm on the boat,
I'm on the boat. And so even if someone's drilling holes in the bottom of the boat,
I'm going to keep bailing water because we all have a survival instinct. So
when you get in relationships like this, specifically marriages like this,
there's a survival instinct in you to just like fix everything so that you don't go down to,
right? You see that things are going down and you have an instinct to try to take over
driving the bus because no one's driving it. Do you understand?
That doesn't make you a control freak. That makes you someone who wants to survive.
That's your trauma response.
Some women shut down and they just let everything go to hell in a handbasket.
Their survival responses, freeze, flee, other women fight. I'm a fighter.
So if you've ever been in a relationship where you've been left holding all the bag,
even if it was a friendship, even if it wasn't romantic and you rose to the occasion, when the
going gets tough, the tough get going, then you just have a you in the fight or flight freezer
fawn trauma response. You're just a fight. The problem is, is people who are a fight,
they burn out their adrenals really quickly. They get things like Epstein-Barr
chronic fatigue syndrome. They get auto-immune disorders, gut issues, right?
At a certain point in our lives, ladies, our body is going to start to manifest
everything that we've allowed.
Chronic pain, fibromyalgia.
And that's enough. God does not want that for his daughters. He does not want that for us.
And I feel in my heart, like the Lord is saying tonight, there are men out there that he has
prepared his Davids from the field that know how to lead, that know how to protect, that know how
to provide emotional and physical security.
that know how to partner, they might not listen.
You need to listen to me.
I feel like I'm speaking from the Lord right now.
They may not be the cutest guys in the world.
Get over it.
They may not be the best dressed guys in the world.
They may not be the tallest men in the world,
but they will be good husbands and good partners.
So you have to start asking yourself,
what have I been looking for?
What is my type?
What have I been attracted to?
Don't hear what I'm not saying.
I'm not saying that they're sloppy and gross
and morbidly obese.
I didn't say that, did I?
I just said next to their more avoidantly attached
player Peter Pan counterparts,
they may not be as well kept.
And think about it.
The men that are out here, Peter Pan's,
never married, forties, fifties, running around,
hair looking good, smelling good, nice clothes.
It's because that is their weapon.
They know that they can get the attention
and the companionship of women.
They know that they can basically have the attention
of any women, especially in that age group that they want.
A man who dresses really nice and smells really good
and has really good hair
that has never been in a relationship,
you gotta watch out for that guy.
Cause you know, lots of women,
lots of women were interested, right?
So why didn't he pick one?
Am I lying?
Same thing goes with women.
If you're conventionally good looking,
I use that lightly because you know,
there's like this societal idea of what good looking is.
If you're conventionally good looking
and you've never been married, what's up?
I'm sure there were lots of men that were interested.
We had to start dealing with attachment style stuff.
We got to start dealing with all kinds of things
when we start talking about that,
but more so for men.
And that's who we're talking about tonight.
We're not meddling with the ladies tonight.
We're not going to meddle with y'all.
All right.
Can we talk about something fun, Jackie?
Where is the place that you were referring to
that it's really hard for men and women
that it's really hard for men and women?
If I wanted to say it, I would have said it, obviously.
So I didn't say it on purpose.
You guys, I'm not a vague person.
I'm pretty direct.
So if I'm being vague, I'm being vague on purpose.
Okay.
Let's see.
Stuck in the hospital for 12 years.
Yes.
Yes, kept dating.
And ladies, you can tell whether a man is just nice
and kind or he's passive pretty quick.
It's one thing if he's, if you're like, you know,
he's like, you're like, where do you want to go?
He's like, where do you want to go?
He doesn't make plans.
He's like, what do you want to do?
Okay.
Maybe he's just nice.
Maybe he just wants you to have a good time.
Maybe he just wants you to have a date that you enjoy.
Okay.
But if he can never make decisions, seriously,
if he can never take initiative,
no, because that doesn't get better after marriage.
You guys, it gets worse.
It gets worse because you know what's going to happen.
You're going to take up slack.
You're going to start taking up the slack.
You're going to make it so that he never really has to do
that anymore because you're going to start doing it.
And that may seem fine at first.
You may just be happy because he's really kind
and you like him and he's got pretty eyes,
but trust me after five years, 10 years of that,
you're not going to be good.
You're not going to be okay with it.
Can I ask you permission on how to navigate
a passive relationship that I'm in that is not romantic?
Sure.
Go for it, girl.
Unmute yourself.
So without getting into too much context, but some,
I had to rescue my parents in November of 2024.
They were in New York and my dad was taking care
of my mom with dementia.
And then I went out there to like clean for them
for the weekend and help.
And he like broke down into complete psychosis,
ended up in the hospital for six weeks.
I cleaned out their hoarder's house, sold their house,
moved my mom into a facility down in Florida.
I brought my dad down here, he's a miracle
and has snapped out of it and is doing great,
but my dad is so disgustingly passive
and I literally, your message, your Facebook today,
I literally was like, I left the house this morning
and my dad, like when I'm around him,
my nervous system is just not okay.
Like it's just not okay and I have like worked
with a therapist for like six months.
I did some EMDR and then I rejoined your program
and did the heart work again and I still,
it's like my nervous system.
So I was like, what the heck is wrong with me?
Like, and then everything you're saying tonight,
like the control, like I'm so controlling
because he's, my mom has abused him his whole marriage
and he still doesn't even like really see it.
And I like, I get so like frustrated and angry with him
and I'm like, and I'm like you, I like,
I say things and I'm blunt and I'm direct
and then I, like you said on Supernatural Saturday,
then I carry the shame for it.
So I'm like kind of like in this cycle of like feeling shame
for feeling this negative nervous system energy
or whatever with my dad and I'm living with him.
So that's the thing, like I'm overseeing him,
I'm doing all the POA stuff, I'm still dating,
like it hasn't stopped me from any of that.
I mean, I'm still in, like I have to initiate the dates
cause none of the men are asking me out,
but I just, I guess as far as,
cause now what I'm hearing you say is like,
you're not a control cause I'm like this whole time
I'm with him, I just feel like I'm horrible,
I'm a control freak, I'm domineering.
I'm like, I'm very, I could be very harsh
and then I start talking down on him
cause I'm like, you need to do this,
you need to get on this, blah, blah, blah.
Well, what you're dealing with,
and I said it in my video today
is you're dealing with resentment.
You resent him and that's playing out in the harshness,
but also at the same time as resenting,
you also love and want to protect.
Right.
And so, but the thing is, is that you can't,
you're not going to change him.
Is mom living with you?
No, she's in a facility.
Okay, so at least she's gone, that's good.
And so you just have him there and maybe,
is this their first time apart?
Okay, so he may start to rally a little bit
now that he doesn't have that over him, which is good.
But at the same time, and I have to do this
with my mom's husband, he's still alive.
And like I said, I don't hate him, she could have left.
It was a toxic situation for her.
It's not a toxic situation for me, it's a toxic situation.
I'm not his wife, I'm not his partner.
And so I have forgiven, but also,
I have to just accept him for who he is.
I just, I can't make him someone that he's not.
And if I'm going to be around him,
if I'm going to love him,
I'm just going to have to love him where he's at.
With good boundaries, of course.
Yes, okay, all right.
But you're not a control freak.
You're a conscientious observer.
You want to change things.
You want people to have their best life.
The problem is, is that they don't want to.
Yeah.
Ladies, we can't, we, listen, potential in men,
like this is her dad we're talking about,
but potential in men, everybody has potential
and everybody can change.
Do people change when they get older?
Not a lot.
Okay, can they?
Absolutely.
Can they have counters?
Are there people that change?
Yes, there are.
But when we're dealing with men,
let's go back to the romantic thing.
When we're dealing with men,
we have to just keep our eyes
because we have this beautiful gift in the feminine
of seeing potential, right?
That's what nurturer means.
The feminine is a nurturer.
It means seeing and helping something reach its potential
is what nurturer means.
You can't do that with full grown adults.
You do that with children.
That's who you do that with.
You don't do that with full grown adults.
They have free will, they have their choices.
Now you can partner with them.
You can help them if they want help
and if they ask for help,
but we can't get into a mindset where we can fix people.
We cannot do that.
If we can't change people, we can't fix people,
but we can love them right where they are
and then ask God for grace for the rest of it.
Can we talk for a sec about this newer thing
with ladies ending up with younger men?
I'm seeing it all over the socials.
Well, it's not a newer thing.
It's not a new thing,
but I will tell you that,
and this is where we need to be careful.
There are a lot of women who are very young at heart.
First of all, men are.
not good guesses of age. I just want you to know that right now.
So there's two different camps here, maybe three different camps.
So we have men they're just attracted to you. Okay.
It's not about age. They don't really know how old you are.
They're attracted to you and it's legitimate and it's good.
And it's not about number. It's about matching seasons, right? So there's that,
there's the camp where, so don't be afraid to date a younger man.
If it's healthy, if he's a leader, just cause he's young, doesn't mean me.
He's not a leader. And someone was saying about the passive men,
maybe he's not a leader. Then don't marry him.
You don't want to marry a man who's not a leader.
I know some of you are attracted to passive men because you've been with
abusive men and now you want a man you can control and you're your own problem.
Because trust me, you're not going to respect that passive man.
After a while, there's a difference between toxic, aggressive alpha, you know,
toxically alpha male and a beta passive.
They're both just as toxic. They're both just as dangerous,
just in different ways. So your pendulum is going to swing over here. You're like,
Oh, this man is safe. You know, I'm going to get with him because you know,
I can dominate him. He's going to do whatever I say. Well, no,
that's going to be bad news bears. Okay. So there could be younger men.
They're leaders. They're masculine in a good way. And yeah,
they're younger than you, whatever,
but you're young at heart and it's still a match you're in the same seasons.
That's cool. So that's the healthy version of that.
And then there's another version of it where dude has some mommy wounds,
just like men that go after young women. He, you know,
he has some reasons why he's attracted to you that are not healthy.
He knows that you're older and it could be possible that, you know,
he likes where you've gotten to in life, the success that you have,
sugar mamas and sugar daddies both exist.
So be careful with that, especially if you're a successful woman.
And then there's a third one and there's probably four or five,
six other versions of this.
So I told you about the healthy one and do not be afraid to date somebody who's
younger than you, if it's a healthy situation,
but then there's another situation.
And this is mostly with men that are not value-based or not Christians,
faith-based kind of men that we would meet Christian men.
But because of porn,
there's a lot of men who are really excited by experienced women.
They're really excited about older women and being with older women that are
sexually experienced kind of like
cuckoo, cuckoo, Mrs. Robinson. All right. So
I found that out the hard way when my daughters were in high school,
I worked at JC Penny for the Christmas season and I was, I don't know,
38, maybe, I don't know, somewhere in there.
And one of my daughter's classmates,
I think she was in 10th grade worked at JC Penny as well.
And he kept coming over to my register all the time and like talking to me and
stuff. And I had met him and seen him before.
And he was a popular kid at their school. And I was just like, Hey,
hi Tyler. You know, I'd always be like, Hey, hi. And you know,
I'm a cute woman,
but that never crossed my mind that he was coming over to talk to me because of
that reason. And then he started bringing his little friends over,
like his friends would visit him at work and they'd all come and see Kaylee's
mom. And then my daughter, Kaylee, this is not my daughter, Reagan.
This is my older daughter. She came home from school. And she's like, mom,
she's like all the guys at school are like, I heard your mom's hot.
Like, where's your mom at Kaylee? You know, Kaylee's mom has got it going on.
Like it was in the thing is that the thing that I found out about it was it's
part of the porn culture. Like these little, these little assholes,
if you allow me to say they have been watching a lot of porn where the women,
because they're teenagers are mature, they're older women, right. You know,
even if they're in their thirties and forties are older than them,
even if they're in their twenties, they're older.
And so there's that mentality as well. And yeah, it was,
it was really gross. So that exists out there, ladies. Yes.
Men who want Cougars. Exactly. Susan. So,
you know, I mean, I was, I mean, they're teenagers.
So I was more of a Panther, not a Cougar,
whatever the next level is from Cougarville. That's where I was,
but I wasn't there. Cause obviously I wasn't interested in that at all. Yeah.
It was really, really creepy. Yes. Kim,
I could see you being Noah's mom for sure. That that's,
I'm telling you these little perverts need to get themselves together.
Some men need to be raising up a gender.
I really was feeling like 26 was a really important year of prayer.
And so if you haven't been coming to prayer, please come to prayer.
The reason why we've had such supernatural success in this movement is because
of the prayer covering and you guys are the ones that make that up.
And so please come. We're going to start praying again over, listen,
God just told us tonight.
And he's told us in the past that he has his Davids in the field.
They are the ones that are going to make that up.
And so please come we're going to start praying again over, listen,
God just told us tonight.
And he's told us in the past that he has his Davids in the field. They exist.
there. And I don't mean the adulterer, murderer, David. Okay.
I mean, just men that are after his heart.
Got to be careful with all these Bible stories. It's a problem.
It's a problem. Okay. So, um, we have to be willing to receive them.
Are you willing to receive them or are you so hung up on your toxic type?
And I know some of you don't even believe you have a type, but you do.
But you do. Um,
I did a carousel on my Instagram about,
about why women pass on good men and they don't realize it till later.
I want you to be honest and raise your hand.
If you have known a good guy in the past that you weren't, you just,
you just weren't feeling it. You just didn't find the, you know,
romantic spark that you wanted. So you passed on him,
but you have wondered at least one time,
if you had made a mistake now that you're still single,
you've wondered if you actually made a mistake. You're like,
did I make a mistake? Could I have partnered with him?
Would it have gotten better? Okay. That's a lot of hands, right?
At least 17, 20 of y'all put your hands down.
All right.
You guys, my husband is really cute,
but he wasn't cute when he was my neighbor.
When I tell you that I could have done much better, I could have,
I mean, I'm fricking five 10.
And back then I was like supermodel. I weighed like 127 pounds.
I could have married a fricking athlete if I had wanted to,
but I married the short fat Bible teacher
next door, but he had a glow up, didn't he?
And you know what that glow up was me, me.
I was the glow up. Why? Because I'm his wife.
And now he's super confident, right? Cause he's like, Oh, he bagged a hottie.
And so now he's like, carry more about his clothes.
And, you know, and he got new glasses and, you know, I mean, women,
this is what we do. This is what we do.
We bring all of the beauty because we are
beauty. The feminine of God is the beauty of God.
So we bring the beauty to things, you know, suddenly, you know,
we're picking out jeans for him that actually fit instead of these short tight,
you know, loose ones or whatever he was wearing. I told him,
I told my husband, you are not a fat woman.
I told my husband, you are not a 44 short.
You are a 42 regular.
Why are you fricking wearing these big? Cause you know, he's saying like,
he's saying worship. He was a worship leader for a mega church.
And his suits just looked so terrible on him. I'm like,
why you are not a 44 short.
You are a 42 regular take this suit jacket off,
put this one on. Oh, you were six,
but now you're an eight. Interesting.
Now I will tell you that he's always had the rhythm boy can dance.
He's got a big old, nice, juicy booty. Um, there were, there were signs,
there were signs, there was, there was, there was potential.
All right. Amazing kisser. Oh, come on.
So we can deal, we can, we can deal with some cosmetic changes.
Now has he lost any weight since I met him? Not a pound,
but we just dress it differently and it looks better.
And I've gained, you know,
40 pounds to just kind of catch up with him and we're all good menopause.
There we have it. Yes, he can dance. He can sing.
So friends,
when you meet a man instead of thinking about all the things that you don't like
about him or that are not your type, why don't you find some stuff?
Why don't you, you know, talk and interact.
And I always tell men this, I'm like,
take women on dates that paint you in the best light.
If you're a good singer, go to karaoke. If you're a good bowler, go to bowling.
If you're great athletic, go to pickleball,
do whatever it is so that she can see you in an element that makes her be
like, Hey,
we want winners. Do we not?
We want winners, but a lot of men are winners.
They're just not showcasing their talent.
talent their correct way because no one's teaching them and
coaching them. All these men's group do is they go out in the
woods and shoot crap together. That's not helpful. Someone
should be taking them to the mall and letting them know that
there are 33 ways, not a 36 ways. Take those fricking jeans
off and put these on. Take them to the dentist. You guys I am a
tooth freak for sure. You know, and some people have naturally
more yellow teeth. Ladies, if we're going to do some beauty
stuff tonight, white teeth go a long way. And if you have like
antibiotic stains or tetracycline stains and
different things like that, and there's only so much you can do
that's true. Um, but you know, for everybody else, especially
if you're a coffee drinker, a red wine drinker, all you gotta
do is get some crest white strips. They work to skip them.
They're like 40 bucks at the grocery. Just get them. Yes. I
mean, teeth are important to most people, but here's the
thing. Don't let teeth be the deal breaker. Do not let teeth
be the deal breaker. They can get Invisalign. They can. If
they got like, they can get Invisalign. My husband got
Invisalign. His bottom teeth. Whoo. His bottom teeth look like
they were having a mosh pit. They were like fighting for
space in there, but they're straight ish. Straight ish now.
He doesn't wear his retainers. So that's that. No, the package,
he doesn't have to be the deal breaker. You need to find out
what makes this guy sexy. If you like him, if you like him, you
guys, if you enjoy being around him at all, but he's not really
your type. And then you, you leave the date. You're like, I
don't know if I'm attracted. Sometimes you feel attracted.
Sometimes you don't because the package is not really what
you're used to. Find out what makes him attractive. Find it.
Okay, wait a second. I saw something good there. I've lost
18 pounds, GLP one micro dosing, highly recommend. All right,
girl, unmute yourself and tell us about it. Because I know a
lot of people are interested.
Okay, well, I am the poster child for it. I'm so excited to
be able to share it with anybody. I do homeopathic
natural health care. I haven't had health insurance since
early 2000s. Everything I do is natural, first of all. My, I
went to my chiropractor, homeopath, naturopath and said,
look, I just cannot get this done. I'm not going to do it.
I just cannot get this weight off of me, which kind of I'm 62.
I went into menopause. I stopped my period. I had my final period
at 60. So I was really late. And yeah, I know. Probably because I
never took birth control is my sneaky suspicion. But I don't
know. My mother was late too. But I just gained all this
belly fat in like months. Like I'm talking like, I had a shelf
with like a little line under my belly, belly fat. And I had been
the same weight, all of my adult life, pretty much 20s, 30s, 40s,
50s. I was just a solid size six, just easy. And then all of
a sudden, I jumped 20 pounds, and nothing I could do to get it
to get it off. So in September, I started on micro dosing under
my chiropractor's care. And what you what we see on TV, which you
know, the ozempic and the Mondoro, whatever. Those are not
what I'm talking about. Those people that follow that route
are the ones that get ozempic face, they lose it too fast. And
then they get into this terrible cycle of quick weight loss. And
they have to stay on it. But when you micro dose, you're
introducing something that is natural in your body. So these
peptides are naturally occurring anyway. And as we get older,
they slow down, of course, as many things do. But these
peptides that they start you on, and you could do it for anything
if you have a knee injury or a hip injury, you could do, you
know, copper peptides, you could do all kinds of peptides for
skincare, skin, renewal, rejuvenation, libido.
And what and what peptide are you taking?
So I'm on it's called terzapatide. T I R.
I-R-Z, terzep, Z-E-P, zepetide.
And I, yeah, terzepetide.
And I started at a very, very micro dose.
It's, I started at 1.2 milligrams.
So when you go to a doctor
and they prescribe something to you, like ozempic,
they're starting you at like 15 to 25 milligrams.
So 15 times that.
I started at 15 times less.
And guys, I just wanted to let you know
that Susan's an OG, she's been around for a long time.
She's a professional chef, you know, so she knows food.
And so I just want to let you guys know, you know,
you don't have to have any kind of knee-jerk reaction.
This is her experience and this is her journey.
And that's what Girls' Night is all about.
So a lot of people may have been curious about GLPs
and specifically terzepetide.
My daughter-in-law-to-be, my son's fiance,
is actually on it right now
because she has really bad PCOS
and she's on a little microdose
and she's been feeling so much better.
So everyone's experiences are different.
It may not be right for everyone.
And there are people out there that are abusing it,
okay, for sure.
So go ahead, Susan.
Yeah, thank you for saying that.
And hi, everybody.
I know I haven't been around a lot,
but I am a moderator for a single city,
Los Angeles group for a long time.
And I love you, Jackie.
And I am always your fan.
Girl, I always have your back because-
I love you, I'm your fan.
You are the real deal.
You are no joke.
You are the real deal.
You and David, blessings.
So anyway, so I started on terzepetide
and I noticed a difference probably in two days.
No joke.
So I am a professional chef.
I don't know if that makes really a difference.
What my real experience,
and this is, I think the biggest shift for me
is that I never realized how loud
the food noise was in my brain.
I was always thinking about my next meal.
I was always, I had no stop button for like a bag of chips,
a thing of cookies, like my, whatever your weakness is,
mine were like carbs and sugar.
And I've never been on medication.
I was never diabetic, never had any medical difficulties,
but this food noise was a real deal.
And I was a late night snacker.
And I also knew that I really enjoyed,
what do you call it?
Intermittent fasting.
I do well, I feel good when my stomach is empty.
And so I just started on those, these terzepetide.
I started on September 8th and I take a shot a week
that I, my chiropractor is just a lovely man
and believes in not overcharging
because these things are expensive
and he sells them through his online community
at wholesale prices.
So it's really like affordable.
If I would say you have a job.
Okay, well.
Yeah, okay.
And so.
I'm so glad that you're having such success.
18 pounds is a lot, especially as we get older
and you look great.
You don't look like the Crypt Keeper, which is good.
I've noticed that some people that are on those,
they start looking, like you said, real,
you can tell they're losing muscle.
It's not good.
Friends, you have to prioritize a healthy lifestyle.
You have to eat a certain amount of protein.
You have to prioritize protein
because you're not gonna be that hungry.
My daughter-in-law-to-be has told me a lot
about what she has to do in order to stay healthy
on a microdose like Susan's talking about.
So Debra wants to know how much.
And once again, her chiropractor,
if he's selling it wholesale, it's different.
I know that my future daughter-in-law is paying like,
I think it's, I wanna say 400 bucks a month.
So anybody could join his group.
You don't have to see him in real life.
He has an online community called The Inner Circle
and I'm happy to share his website
and you guys can go and check it out.
I pay $20 a month just to be part of his membership
and then I have access to the peptides.
For just liability reasons,
we can't really talk about medical stuff
because we're not that kind of group,
but you see Susan and if you want to friend her on Facebook
and you wanna ask her more questions,
then this is a free world and you can do that.
Yeah, absolutely.
But you're right about protein.
I have to really.
be conscientious about protein. Um, but the food noise is gone in my brain. Um, the bloating,
the bloating went away, uh, within a week. Like I have been bloated unknowingly for like
a dozen years.
I love it. That's so amazing. I also want to say that I also have, I've drive dropped
20 pounds, um, and, um, and, and from fasting. So GLP ones, they, they, they, what they do
is it's, it's basically about fasting. Um, it's causing you to not have an appetite.
So it's, it's, it's forcing the fast. Um, but you guys know that I had some gallbladder
issues over the summer, which kind of forced me into a forced fast. And then I saw why
I was, while I wasn't really able to eat much that I was dropping weight really quickly.
I've never been really a big faster, like spiritual fasting. I've done some of it,
but not a lot of it. But then when I was starting to feel better and I was starting to be able
to eat more and more food again, um, I just deliberately and intentionally started to
do a 16, eight window. So I fast for 16 hours. I stopped eating by seven, um, most nights
and I do not start eating until noon. I am not hungry in the morning as far as like ravenously
hungry. Um, and it has made all the difference. I have not gained any of that lost weight
back. Um, and it's been over what, six months. I mean, normally if you fast just fast, like
starve yourself and you lose weight, as soon as you start eating normally again, you will
gain it back. But intermittent fasting has helped me not only lose 20 pounds, but keep
it off. And so I just really want to say that as well. I went down to dress sizes and, um,
Yeah. And once again, same thing, hormonal weight game, same as Susan. So you can also
try intermittent fasting. If you haven't ever done that, you should, you should try it.
They do rec, they really recommend it for menopausal women, um, perimenopausal and menopausal
women, younger women be careful with it because your hormones need food. They need calories.
They need fat. They need protein. Um, so intermittent fasting has been a huge game changer for me.
Okay. You guys were running out of time. Thank you for Susan for sharing. Um, I see a lot
of people, um, just kind of saying that they really want to get their health on track.
I believe this could be the year for you to get that on track. Whatever has been keeping
you from getting it on track. Remember the siege is over friends. All of us have had
distractions and disruptions and things that have been demonically trying to keep us from
our best lives. And don't under, don't, don't underestimate the enemy and the way that he
works in our lives. If there's been an area in your life where you've just always wanted
change, but you've never been able to really sustain it, it probably is some sort of stronghold
is probably under the banner of what I was talking about, which is the siege is over.
So try again. If you've just given up because you've tried in the past and it's never worked,
try again. Just go ahead and try again. There'll be new information. There'll be new information.
Thank you for talking about my hair color because in person, it looks a little crazy.
Someone's like, I like your hair color. Well in person, I don't know if you will, but I
appreciate that. It looks okay on camera. Let's see. I need to eat something. I've realized, okay.
I thought the marsh is like, I need to eat something. This whole conversation about food is
making me hungry. I got to go eat something. I thought that's what you meant. Okay. All right.
You guys how do we know? How do we know that we're choosing God's highest and his best?
You're not going to know that and you don't need to know that. Listen, we've got to get out of the
waiting room of, is this God's best for me? This is his highest for me. You, this is why you take
it one date at a time, one step at a time. This is why it's a yes until it's a no. Too many people
try to make quick judgments about whether or not this is God's person for them when you haven't
even gotten a chance to know this person. And usually it's based on something that you think
is not in alignment with God's got a word that you got or, you know, what you thought it was
going to feel like or look like. And this is why I always say, especially for, you know, you older
ladies that have basically been thinking about this for a really long time. You've been single
for a really long time. You may have had bad experiences, divorces, whatever, but you've
been single for a long time. You've had a lot of time to think about this and to start kind of
dreaming up what it's going to feel like, or be like, or what.
You think it has to be like,
and I really want you to be careful about that.
This is why I always say,
when you first come into the program,
just meet a bunch of people and give them a chance.
Give them more than one date.
Go on at least three dates with somebody
if they're not a serial killer.
That's what we used to say back in the day.
And ladies, if they're initiating,
don't even go on a second date with them.
If you had to plan the date,
if they didn't even ask for another date,
if you said you had a good time
and they didn't even text you when you got home.
One of the girls that's about to join this program,
she's on my Instagram.
She's like, yeah, I was seeing this guy
and I texted him and said,
oh, my car overheated and it's broke down.
And he didn't even answer.
He went to, I think maybe he said,
oh, that's too bad or whatever.
Cause he was on his way to a Bible study
and he went to his Bible study.
And at 10 o'clock at night,
he texted her and was just like,
hey, I hope everything worked out.
Boy, bye.
Bye.
He's not long distance.
He's local.
He's in proximity.
If the girl that you've taken on a couple of dates
tells you that her car's broke down and she's broke down
and you don't offer to help her
skip your little Bible study, that's a no.
It's a yes until it's a no.
And now it has become a big old N-O.
There's no second chance for that friends.
Cause that's a pattern.
That's gonna keep repeating itself.
That is not a masculine leader man.
David was just my next door neighbor and I lost my phone.
I lost my cell phone back in the flip phone days.
I had a razor phone.
Anyone else have a razor phone?
Anyone have a razor phone?
Those Motorola little razor, real thin little phone.
Anyway, my phone either quit working, I lost it.
I can't remember.
It was 20 years ago.
I don't remember.
But I do know that he wasn't dating me.
He wasn't my boyfriend.
We hadn't even acknowledged that we had any feelings
towards each other.
I don't even know if we had any feelings
towards each other yet.
But Craigslist was a thing, do you remember that?
Where you just went and met up with total strangers
off the internet to buy things from them.
Sounds like a scary situation.
And I was scared.
But there was person on Craigslist
who wanted to sell me their phone,
but I had to drive to their house
to get it or meet them somewhere.
And so I asked him, because he was my neighbor,
and we already carpooled our kids,
did favors for each other.
And I said, hey, I need to go pick up a phone.
I'm buying a phone from someone on Craigslist.
I said, I'm really scared to go by myself.
Would you go with me?
And he said, absolutely, I will take you.
And he took me.
And he was there to meet this guy and buy the phone.
And then on the way home, he's like, are you hungry?
Yes, and he stopped at a Mexican restaurant
and he bought me dinner.
He wasn't my boyfriend.
We weren't in a romance.
That's a leader man, right?
That's a leader man.
That's a real man.
Now, there were some other areas that he needed some work.
That's fine, but he continued to show
that type of initiative and that type of concern.
And that's what you're looking for.
That's your number one non-negotiable from now on.
He doesn't even get a second date
if he's not showing any kind of initiative,
any kind of leadership potential, okay?
Sound good?
All right, yay, David.
Ladies, God said he has Davids in the field.
Maybe he's talking about my David.
I can't tell you how many people after I gave that word
started marrying guys named David.
I'm like, okay, whatever, we'll do whatever it is
that we gotta do here, we'll do it.
Last question for tonight.
Can we talk about flirting and dropping the hanky
with guys in public in 2026?
Yes, but remember, we're allowed to flirt.
We're allowed to drop the hanky.
We're allowed to show interest,
but what happens after that is gonna show us
whether or not this guy has any potential
to be a leader in a partnership.
Because if he can't lead in the dating phase, you guys,
then he won't be able to lead a household later.
He's not gonna be able to, okay?
This is where he should be showing up the strongest,
and that's when he's intrigued with a woman,
when he's interested in a woman, okay?
So how can we drop the hankies with men in public?
The quickest and easiest ways that you can show interest
in a man is holding eye contact
for a couple seconds longer than normal and smiling.
That is the easiest way that you can show contact.
The easiest way you can make contact and show interest.
So normally if you catch someone's eye,
most people look away immediately,
but if you catch his eye,
hold his eye for a couple seconds longer,
smile, give him a big smile, you know,
and then you can look away, all right?
So that's the number one thing that you can do.
You also can just say hi to him.
You can also just say hi.
You know, if you're in an environment
where people are mingling
and people are getting to know each other,
it's okay for you to walk up to him first
because maybe he hasn't even seen you yet.
And you can say, hey, hi, I'm Nora.
That's it.
Hi, I'm Nora.
When a woman walks up to a man and introduces herself,
the ball is now in his court.
You have shown all of the interest that you need to show,
especially if it's a singles event, a mixer of some kind,
anything that has the context of single people,
introducing yourself is dropping the hanky, right?
Men like women that are a little bit cheeky.
Let me put it this way.
Good men like women that are a little bit fun and feisty.
Okay?
So when you are talking to a stranger, you know,
and maybe you're talking a little bit,
another way you can show interest
is just by a little push on the shoulder,
a little jab, a little kind of funny situation
in the conversation.
You know, if you're quick-witted,
which Nora definitely is a quick-witted woman.
If you're quick-witted, you know,
you can say something a little sarcastic.
That's called flirting.
Not mean, not underhanded,
not something that's gonna cause him to have low,
you know, low self-esteem reaction,
but something that's just a little bit cute.
Right?
And some of you are just bold women.
And if you wanna be bold, you can be bold.
I think that the initial meeting has nothing to do
with whether or not this man will initiate.
I don't feel like that has anything to do with it.
In your initial meeting, okay?
Whatever that looks like.
And so if you want to, you know,
make it beyond a shadow of a doubt
that you're interested in him,
and you wanna say something really bold,
like, hey, if you asked me out, I'd say yes,
go ahead for it.
I did that with David.
When I finally knew that I was interested, I was bold.
But then he showed up from there.
And sometimes if you're guys with us, with neighbors,
and with our kids and everything,
sometimes people don't want to,
men don't wanna shoot their shot
unless they really know you're interested,
because then they still have to live next to you.
They still have to carpool kids with you.
You know, if it's someone at work,
they still have to work with you.
If it's someone at church,
they still have to go to church with you.
So they wanna be really, really sure
that you actually like, you know,
want to say yes to them, right?
And so you may need to be a little bit more bold
with someone that is like a friend or an acquaintance
in a context where you guys see each other a lot.
You may have to be a little bit bolder
because like Megan said, it does feel riskier.
Feels a little riskier for them.
They just wanna be sure.
They wanna make sure
that they're not reading the signs wrong, okay?
All right, all right, all right.
Okay, you guys, I had fun tonight.
I hope you guys had fun tonight.
We're gonna do this at least once a month.
For phase three, which is all of you guys are in phase three,
which is VIP community, that's what the name of it is now.
We're gonna do a lot more coaching.
Whatever has you stuck, we want you to get unstuck.
So the calendar is gonna look a little different.
It's gonna be less social activities.
We're still gonna do single spotlights.
In fact, I'm gonna start spotlighting a lot of single men
that are not in our community.
I'm gonna actually launch my podcast,
which is gonna be more of like
just a glorified single spotlight.
And the men that I spotlight,
no matter where I spotlight them,
whether it's in here on a Zoom
or whether it's on my Instagram or on my podcast,
the women in this community
will have first dibs at introductions.
Now we're not gonna hold them back from their spirit mate
if it's not one of y'all, okay?
If it becomes apparent that someone else from the outside
really should be introduced to them,
then of course we'll do it.
But we are going to exhaust our resources
within the community first, okay?
So just so you know.
But we will still have single spotlight.
We still will still have an occasional love story
to keep your faith high.
We'll do other things.
We'll have some guest speakers
and some different people come in,
but we're gonna do a lot of coaching.
We're gonna do a lot of specific coaching.
We're gonna do a lot of helping you get ready
for specific situations that are coming in the future
in these relationships.
You know, things that you're gonna have to overcome
because.
you know, your love story is going to require you to overcome those things,
whether it be your age, whether it be being divorced,
marrying someone who's divorced by this blended family,
whether it's some physical situation that you're dealing with,
whether it's overcoming, um, you know,
past abuse and really trusting people. It doesn't matter what it is.
We're going to be coaching because it is time.
We do lots of coaching in phase one and phase two.
And then phase three is just turn into social hour. No,
we want you guys to continue the burn,
continue to get free and continue to have success.
And so we were going to do some small group coaching,
some larger group coaching, some very specific coaching.
So I hope you're excited about that. Starting with February's calendar,
we're going to see all those changes start to pop on there. All right.
2026 y'all this is your year.
There's no reason why it can't be your year and not just for love,
but for all kinds of breakthrough that you've been waiting on for so long,
go ahead and claim it, go ahead and say it,
go ahead and say that it's going to happen for you and then be willing to show
up and do the work to get it, whatever that thing is. All right. All right.
Okay. Oh, one more thing. We are announcing Austin retreat.
We're going to be announcing the dates. Um, probably the end of next week,
you guys, we're not going to cap it this time.
We're going to actually be using a hotel.
That's a really cool Texas hotel kind of very Austinite kind of situation.
And we're going to be using the spaces in there because it's going to coincide
with a singles conference. So Austin retreat,
and then singles conference after it, like this year we did Austin's richer,
Austin retreat. And then we did a party this year.
We're going to do like a singles thing. We're going to do a conference.
We're going to do it a whole shish boom, bam thing.
And we're going to have a really cool retreat where as many people,
probably as many people as want to come to it can.
So if you miss that on the Austin retreat and you really wanted to come this
year is going to be better than ever. Okay.
And then we're going to, we're going to release our other retreats for the year
as well. I don't think we're going back to Columbia again this year.
This would be our third year in Columbia,
but there's a good chance we're going to Costa Rica. Okay.
So if you ever wanted to go to Costa Rica,
then keep your ears and eyes open for that. And yeah,
we'll be releasing the whole list of retreat dates here. Um, really soon.
All right. See you soon guys. Love you. Bye-bye.