I wanted to just jump in here at the beginning of our activation tonight because after I
got off Supernatural Saturday, how many of you were there live on Supernatural Saturday
yesterday morning?
Let me see your hands.
Okay.
We ran a little over because Holy Spirit was moving and we just continued in the activations,
in the declarations.
But when I got off of the call, that same spirit of deliverance was just upon me.
And I got massive breakthrough yesterday morning from the grief that I had been carrying ever
since my mom passed away.
My mom's birthday is coming up.
It's this coming Wednesday.
It'll be six years since she passed away.
It just actually just was six years, February 3rd.
And I've just been carrying this low-level, kind of like a low-grade fever.
I've just been carrying this low-level heaviness, grief.
And every time I think that it's gone, it's just really not gone.
And I was completely delivered of that when I got off the call.
I felt it lift.
I felt it break.
And I haven't felt it since.
So I mean, today's Mother's Day.
Normally, I would be feeling some kind of way on this day, even though I am a mother
and my kids celebrate me well.
My husband celebrates me well.
Just not having a mother on earth, as a lot of you know, because you're in that same situation.
But I do not feel anything but joy.
And even though I had a really hard childhood, I just really feel like a freedom to kind
of remember the high points and the good times and the good things.
And remember my mom for the things she did right instead of wrong.
And that's just huge.
I can't tell you how many times I've just only remembered the bad because the majority
was bad.
But you guys, nothing is all bad.
There's no such thing as all bad.
And I know that when you've been traumatized, especially a post-traumatic stress disorder,
which I've been diagnosed with, it's easy to be triggered and only remember bad things
or negative things and to live in a constant state of fight, flight, fawn, freeze, a constant
state of fear.
But I'm telling you, yesterday when I got off the call, all of that broke off of me.
It was really incredible.
And hopefully some of you got some level of deliverance and freedom as well.
But I want to go after more of that tonight.
So Candy, that's why I popped in because I want to go after more of that.
For the guys that are on, I think that there's a lot of reasons why men are not married is
because they have lost their mothers or their mothers were emotionally or physically distant
or unavailable to them.
And they somehow along the lines just started believing that women are unsafe, that women's
emotions are unsafe, that women are unsafe, or that they just feel rejected by women.
They have been criticized by the feminine in their life, and it's difficult for them
to open up, to let their guard down.
And one of the things that's necessary in order for you to get into a romantic relationship,
guys, for the guys that are on this call, is for you to be able to be vulnerable, is
for you to be able to be emotionally present, emotionally available, as they say, with a
woman.
If you're closed off, women need to feel like they're attaching and that they're connecting.
And so you have to be able to connect at that level.
And so you wouldn't be able to connect if you're guarding yourself.
You wouldn't be able to connect if you're constantly scanning the situation for control,
for criticism, for manipulation.
And then ladies, same thing.
If you have been wounded by or hurt by the feminine in your life, it's going to be difficult
for you to model the feminine.
It's going to be difficult for you to also really know who you are and your own identity
as a woman or as the feminine, if that wasn't modeled in a healthy way for you.
And so there's just so much, there's so much stuff that God really wants to just release
us from.
And some of you, you know, you've lost your parent, you know, maybe they were really great
and they're gone and they've been gone.
For some of you, they were gone pretty early in life.
They weren't there for any of the high moments of your life.
They weren't there when you got married before, when you had children before, when you graduated
or, you know, just the things that you would have wanted mom to be there for.
And that grief maybe never got fully processed.
Maybe you had to grow up fast because of the loss of mom.
Maybe she was alive, but she was mentally ill.
There can be all different types of situations that happen.
happen that keep us from being able to really heal at the time when we were wounded, right?
And we've just been in this holding pattern for a really long time.
So we want to just bring more freedom to that tonight.
Did anyone take on that activation with sending a card to a mother figure that is still alive
that maybe you wouldn't normally do that?
Can I see a hand of anyone who activated that?
Looks like Damaris activated that.
Ah, several people activated that.
That's awesome.
Let me look here at the comments here for a second.
Alice sent flowers.
Michael whose mother has passed away quite some time ago was reflecting on his mom's
history.
Many people's moms are in heaven.
And you know, I think that it's really amazing that today is Mother's Day when we're having
this activation.
And yes, happy Mother's Day to all of you that are mothers.
And I think women are all mothers at some level.
So you know, if you want to claim the title of mother, I think women mother, if you don't
feel like you're maternal at all and that just offends you to be included, then don't
be offended.
If it's not for you, then you can just release it.
But for those of you that, you know, you have mothered people, you have helped people, you
have nurtured people, you have mentored people, you have been a feminine force in the earth,
then you know, we celebrate you.
We do.
We celebrate women.
Women are important.
The feminine is important.
Mothers are very vitally important.
Okay.
So we can start off with that candy.
If you want to just go after that Ephesians, you know, putting off bitterness, we definitely
want to do that.
We want to release it.
You guys, once again, I feel like I have been released from some sort of prison that I was
still living in.
And I think some of that's connected to victim.
I did have a really rough childhood.
A lot of bad things have happened, you know, even losing my mom and not being able to fully
process with her and being able to fully get that mother daughter relationship that I always
wanted.
And then when she got sick, she also became very vulnerable and let her guard down and
became a lot more approachable and a lot more, I was able to get closer to her than I ever
have in my entire life.
And then she left and went to heaven.
And so, you know, feeling, you know, kind of gypped, if I'm just going to be honest
about it, feeling a little robbed in that situation of always praying for that all my
life and then finally getting it under not great circumstances.
And then, you know, and then it being cut off or not fully lived out.
So some of you may be dealing with that as well.
But I feel like I was released from that.
So let me start with that.
So Father, I just pray over this time together, that spirit of deliverance would be here.
I'm just sensing right now that it's actually an angel.
It's actually an angel of deliverance, sets us free from that victim mentality.
If you guys, I'm just really just speaking from Holy Spirit right now, that that angel
that was at the pool of Bethesda, you know, that was stirring the water, a lot of those
people, you know, it's not just physical illness that we are healed from, you know, a lot of
physical illness, especially if you're trapped in a situation for a long period of time,
whether it's emotionally or it's emotional or it's physical, it can come with it.
What can come with it is that victim type of mentality, like why me, poor me, this has
happened to me and nothing's ever going to get better, all the things.
And you see that when Jesus comes on the scene, the man that he talks to that's been at the
pool of Bethesda for a long, long, long, long time, you know, he asked him if he wants to
be healed.
And he basically just makes all kinds of excuses of why he can't be healed, of why he hasn't
been healed, he's not fast enough, he can't get in the water, someone always gets there
before him, you know, there's no one to help him, you know, all the different things.
And of course, he's talking to Jesus, which makes the entire story ironic, because, you
know, your healer is standing right in front of you.
And so it's a situation where I feel like that angel.
Angel is the angel that is present and stirring us, stirring our hearts, stirring the water
within us, stirring up the Holy Spirit within us.
So I feel like that angel is present with me and I feel like the ministry of Holy Spirit
is present with you.
I have sensed that angel before at different meetings that I've been at and definitely
that angel has shown up in my life, in where I am, in the space that I'm in.
Because, you know, angels are not omnipotent.
The angel that's with me right now can't be with you.
You know, it's not in all places, it's just right here, but I'm sensing that it is here.
And so, Father, I'm asking that you speak to me and you speak through me, that I am
just angelically undergirded and of course girded up with Holy Spirit and Holy Spirit
is ministering to all of those that are listening on this call tonight, that there's going to
be healing in bodies as we come into a place of forgiveness towards our mothers, towards
the women in our lives that have hurt us.
There's going to be healing in minds as we come into a place of forgiveness and we align
ourselves, as we release victim mentalities, as we release poor me, why me mentalities,
as we release those mentalities, as we forgive ourselves, as we forgive God and others, we
will be released from prisons that we don't even know that we're sitting in, the door
has been open all the time, but we have not had the sight to get up and walk out.
We have not been able to see, we have not been aware.
So there's a awareness that is going to come over people, that they do not have to live
however they've been living anymore, that they don't have to put up with what they've
been putting up with anymore, that they can have what it is that you have promised them,
God, that they can receive what it is that you have had waiting for them all along.
And we just believe this and we're receiving it right now.
We're going to stay in the vein of prayer, we're going to stay in the vein of the supernatural
because this is a very supernatural moment, Lord.
So we just thank you for that.
We thank you for that right now.
I'm just feeling that there are people on here that you've internalized this.
It might be an unconscious thought, now listen up, it might be unconscious, but you've internalized
the idea that if my own mother couldn't love me, if my own mother couldn't admire me, if
my own mother didn't think I was wonderful and great, if my own mother wasn't fully devoted
or even obsessed with me like I see so many other people's mothers, then there must be
something wrong with me.
I must be damaged and there must be something wrong.
There must be something lacking.
There must be something failing in me.
I must be unlovable or unworthy since the one person whose unconditional love should
be guaranteed wasn't.
And God wants you to know that the only love that's unconditional is his.
The only love that's guaranteed is his.
People fail, their love fails, even mother's love fails.
It doesn't mean that you are unworthy, it doesn't mean that you're unchosen, it doesn't
mean that you are unlovely, it doesn't mean that you're unlovable.
It just means that your mother was broken and that she wasn't able to love you the way
that God loves you.
She wasn't able to be a conduit of God's agape love towards you.
She wasn't able to do that.
It has nothing to do with you.
It's not an indictment against you.
It isn't.
It says nothing about your worth or value.
And so right now, we just speak freedom over you from that lie that you are unworthy, that
you're unlovely, that you're unlovable, that if your own mother didn't love you or rejected
you, then no one else is going to love you or accept you.
Either we break that off of you in Jesus' name, we break that off of you in Jesus' name
right now.
All lies about your worth and your value, all the things that have been said to you
with a sharp tongue, all the things that have been said to you, all the criticism that's
been heaped on you, you're not thin enough, you're not tall enough, you're not pretty
enough, you don't do your hair right, you don't dress right, are you going to wear that?
Are you going to eat that?
All the fat shaming, all the body shaming that came through the feminine in your life.
All the, are you stupid?
All the, can you learn?
Can't you learn?
What's wrong with you?
Why do you keep doing this?
Are you stupid?
All the, are you lazy?
Why are you so lazy?
Why are you so ugly?
All the comparing you to someone that they don't like.
You're just like your grandma.
You're just like your aunt.
You're just like your dad.
Comparing you to someone that they have no respect,
no admiration for.
You don't look like me.
You look like your dad.
You get that nose from your dad.
You get that weight from your dad.
I'm feeling a lot of comments via Holy Spirit
about body shaming coming from mom.
Shaming you about how you look,
how you dress, how you carry yourself.
A lot of religious ideas of being good,
of being quiet, of doing what you're told,
being submissive.
A lot of people's voices have been shut down by mom.
Her telling you that what you're saying doesn't matter,
that you should sit down and shut up,
that you should stop being so rebellious,
giving it spiritual reasons.
You're rebellious.
You're talking back.
You're disrespectful.
When none of that was true,
you were just trying to speak up.
You were trying to be heard.
You were trying to let people know that you had needs.
Come on, y'all.
Mom, we're just gonna sit in this for a second.
Never being hugged or touched or kissed or said I love you.
Never having any of that.
Always being criticized,
always being told that you're not doing enough.
You're not doing enough.
Some of you have loved on your moms today,
even though they don't deserve it,
which is fine, that's great.
Love is what we give to people,
not because they deserve it,
but because God is love and we're conduits of God's love.
People have sent voicemails, people sent flowers,
people sent cards.
People sent cards that said things that are not true
in the natural, calling your mom up to a higher level.
Sarah did, Emma did.
Jennifer, Damaris, Kevin.
Kevin said, but she is the best mom.
That's great.
Flowers, voicemails, good things, friends.
Come on, you guys.
Just lean in a little bit here.
Some of you just releasing the emotional wounds
of a feminine voice in your life.
The emotional wounds, name calling,
the emotional wounds of a feminine voice in your life.
The emotional wounds, name calling,
the criticism, painful words, painful actions,
neglect, abandonment, not feeling important.
That's all emotional wounds.
The verbal wounds.
Some of you releasing physical wounds,
being hit, smacked, pushed.
Slapped is a big one, women tend to be slappers.
Slapping, being slapped across the face.
So humiliating, so painful, so hurtful.
Releasing, releasing, releasing that.
Spiritual wounds, being told that
you're not pleasing to God.
Because you're not pleasing to them.
Being taught things about God that are not true through their lens because that's their
lens.
Whoever God is to you, he will be through you.
So being taught things that are not true through their lens.
Being dismissed or neglected or even abandoned because of not holding their religious views
as you got older.
A young woman told her story just recently to my daughter that her parents have ostracized
her because they don't think she is living her life the way that she should.
As far as, you know, she's charismatic.
She believes in the Holy Spirit.
They think that she's in a cult.
They think that she's not living the way that they raised her or taught her to live.
And they're not going to have anything to do with her until she does what they want.
Some of you have to recover and be delivered of the pain that comes from being manipulated,
the pain that comes from being controlled.
Only being loved when you're doing exactly what they want you to do.
Thinking exactly what they want you to think.
We're just letting all this stuff go so we can begin to, like Michael already is, start
thinking of some sweet thoughts.
Remember we can't erase, but we can replace.
And we're going to release and be at peace.
You always know it's Holy Spirit when we're rhyming stuff.
Going to release and be at peace.
It's going to be great.
All right, does anyone have those Ephesians scriptures up?
Kandi, do you have that?
Yes, I do.
All right, go ahead.
You want me to read it?
Yeah.
Okay.
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger.
You're talking about that one, right, Jackie?
Yes.
And clamor.
This is amplified.
Perpetual animosity.
Perpetual anger.
Perpetual animosity, resentment, strife, fault finding, and slander be put away from you.
Along with every kind of malice, all spitefulness, verbal abuse, malvolence, be kind and helpful
to one another.
Tenderhearted, compassionate, understanding, forgiving one another readily and freely as
God and Christ also forgave you.
And gentlemen, this includes women that you've been in relationship with, not just your mother's,
women that you were married to formerly, maybe a sister.
I had one client who was traumatized by his older sister.
She just, you know, she acted as a second mother in his life and just was very hard
on him, very critical of him.
Always thinking that he was up to no good, always, you know, just thinking the worst
of him.
And it really, it really took its toll on him.
So guys, that could also be your former wives.
Ladies, it can be another figure in your life that's feminine.
It doesn't have to be your mother.
It could be a sister.
There's a lot of sibling rivalry.
Can be an older or younger sister.
It's always in competition, always trying to one-up you, always being very manipulative
or very dismissive, negative towards you.
Could be a grandparent.
My grandmother was horribly verbally abusive to her daughters.
And she tried to be that way to me, but I ain't the one.
I'm not the one.
All of those things, putting those things away.
God wants to give you back a tender heart tonight.
Scripture talks about having a soft heart.
There's another scripture that talks about he will take our hearts that are made of stone
and he will make them flesh again.
Having a soft heart is really important, friends.
And that goes back to the idea that we are God-defended so we don't have to be self-defended.
I know having a soft heart sounds a little scary.
It's like, oh, you know, if I allow God to soften my heart, then my heart can easily
be broken.
Actually, hard things, brittle things are the things that break easily.
Soft things are, you know, they're much more resilient, aren't they?
Those things kind of bounce, don't they?
Brittle things are the things that break.
Hard things are the things that break.
So when we're more tender-hearted, I believe we're more resilient, less breakable, more
moldable and shapeable, and we're God-defended.
We're God-defended.
Friends, we have to let go of these ideas of ourself that we have received because of
the way someone else treated us.
Do you guys know about my homeless friend, James?
You guys have heard me talk about him, right?
For those of you that haven't, he's just an unhomed person that lives near the business
that we have, Wheelhouse, in central to downtown Austin, and we've been helping him.
God told me what his name was.
It was a very supernatural moment when we met him, and we've been trying to help him.
He's in his early 40s, and we've been trying to help him the best that we can, just trying
to give him food and clothing and different things, all while trying to find resources
so that he can be housed, so that he doesn't have to be homeless anymore.
Well, my friend James was ran over by a car two days ago, and he was taken to the hospital,
and I went and saw him yesterday in the hospital.
He had to go to surgery, and they had to reconstruct his ankle, which was completely obliterated
by being run over.
And when I got to the hospital room, the nurse was just about to be off duty.
There was about to be a shift change, and the nurse that was taking care of him, her
name is Felicia, she was a godsend.
She understood.
She was an ally for the homeless.
She understood his mental health situation.
She understood that his fight or flight response was really strong because of living on the
streets for so long and not trusting people, and that he was on medication, that he was
in pain.
You know, there was just all kinds of extenuating circumstances.
So she was being very patient with him.
But when I went in, she informed me that he had refused for them to help him with added
resources and that the hospital was going to release him to the street later that day.
Guys, he just came out of surgery.
They were going to put him out on the street.
This is what hospitals do when you don't have insurance and, you know, you're just you're
taking up a bed that a bed can make money, right?
It's a big money game, and we all know it's true.
But this nurse was specifically assigned to him by God because she conveniently didn't
get his medication from the pharmacy in the hospital before it closed.
And so he she bought him a whole nother day.
And when I got there, I talked to him about I wanted to get him into this this program,
this community program called First Community Village, 300 acres of 3D printed tiny homes.
And they'll let you have one for you, a tiny home for you for as long as you're alive,
as long as you follow the rules.
This place has a year or more long waiting list.
But because he's hospitalized and because he's now disabled, he goes right to the top
of the list.
And they were able to get him into First Community Village if he wanted to go.
And so I'm like, James, why don't you wanna go?
This is what we've been working towards.
This is what we've been trying to do.
And he's like, yeah, yeah, you're right.
I wanna go, I wanna go.
So Felicia puts in the order before she gets off her shift.
The caseworker Sarah's coming in in the morning
and she's gonna make sure all the paperwork goes through
and she's gonna make it happen.
She comes on shift at 8 a.m.
So we're gonna be down there at 8 a.m.
And guess what?
We get down there at 7.45 a.m.
And his room is empty.
He left an hour beforehand because he got mad at someone.
And he left AMA, which is against medical advice,
signed himself out of the hospital in a wheelchair,
unable to walk, unhomed on the streets.
Started driving around.
He couldn't have gotten far, right?
Start driving around, looking for him.
Friends, he was all the way on the other side of town
where our business is, where he's unhomed
and where he stays and panhandles next to the freeway
and underpass where he got hit by a car.
He's back there in a wheelchair panhandling
within four hours of leaving the hospital
against medical advice and turning down
the best blessing and offer of his life.
You're like, well, there must be something
wrong with him, Jackie.
I'll tell you what's wrong with him, shame.
I'll tell you what's wrong with him.
He does not see himself through the eyes
of anything except a victim and shame.
You know what he's out there doing?
He's out there complaining about his situation.
Oh, nobody cares about me.
I'm handicapped now.
Yeah, this is what the system does to you.
This is what society does to you.
He just had an opportunity.
So I found him and I said, what are you doing?
Why are you here?
Well, you know, they weren't gonna,
yeah, they were gonna help you.
What you're saying to yourself is not true, it's a lie.
And some of you, you can shake your heads,
but I'm telling you, you're living under
the same imprisoned mind as him.
It just looks different on you.
You're putting up with the same crappy paycheck
that doesn't pay your bills and you're telling yourself,
well, I just don't have the education or I'm too old
or I can't get a livable wage or, you know,
I've just been here for too long.
There's no other course of action.
No, you're just like him.
I'm not trying to beat you up.
I'm just trying to tell you, you're just like him.
You're believing the same type of lies he's believing.
And it takes someone to come alongside you.
I was there when they offered him First Community Village.
I was there when she put in the order.
I talked to the caseworker, Sarah, on the phone,
but he's seeing things through a filter that doesn't exist.
He's seeing things through a lie that's not real.
And we are too.
And you guys, it all starts with our very first cheerleader.
It all starts with mom.
It all starts with dad.
It all starts with whatever we learned there.
And some of you are like, mom was the best.
She might've been the best in the fact that she loved you
and she baked you cookies and she kissed you goodnight
and she was at all your games,
but she also handed you a poverty mindset.
And so, no, we're not gonna be mad at mom,
but we are going to need to forgive her
and we're also going to need to throw out what she taught us
so that you don't have to be mad at mom.
It's time to be free you guys.
It's time to be free.
Some of you are dealing with problems in your body
that are being caused by lack of care.
You're just not taking care of yourself.
You know why?
Because you hate yourself.
How can someone else, you're here to meet a mate,
how can someone love you when you hate you?
And you know why you hate you?
Because mom hated either you or herself.
Some of you had moms that told you
that you could do anything,
but you watch them tell themselves
that they could do nothing.
You watch them look in the mirror
and call themselves ugly and call themselves fat.
You watch them kill themselves slowly
with their fork, diabetes, heart disease.
You saw them sit around all day
and watch soap operas and zone out,
eat bad food, not move their body, smoke, drink.
Am I wrong?
You saw them prematurely age, prematurely die.
And some of you saw them be the sweetest and nicest person on earth that put every single
person above themself and you're like, oh, they were a saint.
My mom was a saint.
My grandma was a saint.
No, they weren't.
They were helping everyone while killing themselves.
You don't get an award for that.
You know why they were helping other people and this is going to hit differently and I'm
sorry to have to say it because they were trying to earn self-worth from helping others.
They were trying to finally feel like they were a good person inside.
They were trying to feel like they were worthy or worth something because other people were
praising them or being thankful for them.
But they were just a giver that was being used and attracting a bunch of takers, being
taken advantage of all in the name of being thought of as a good person and being loyal
because they didn't think of themselves as a good person because of whoever hurt them
or told them that they were unworthy of love.
Do you see what I'm trying to say?
Some of them were even full-time ministers, but they died early.
They died prematurely.
They died of sickness and disease because their bodies were broke down.
Some of them are still caught up in the same toxic cycles.
Some of you love your mom.
She's the greatest person.
You love your grandma.
You love your auntie.
You love whoever, but they're still married to an abuser and user.
They're still married to someone who's bad and treats them badly.
And you know, the whole family thinks they're a saint for putting up with it, or they think
that they're stupid for putting up with it.
But the truth is, is that they just don't love themselves.
And that was modeled for you.
So we're going to do a little forgiveness work.
Okay.
That's all of those people.
And then there are some of you that, you know, you've struggled with infertility in your
marriages.
You miscarried.
Let's get the hands up of all the people that have miscarried.
My hand is up.
I have a daughter in heaven.
Her name is Abigail.
I miscarried in my second trimester.
I was 18 years old.
Just a couple.
Okay.
Let's see the hands of all the people that wanted children, but never got to have them.
Let's see all the people who want children and still hope to have them, but they're not
sure if it's going to work out or happen.
It's a dream.
It's a hope.
Everyone get your hands up.
You wanted them.
You never got them.
And now let's add to all these hands, people who have children, but your relationship with
your children is just really not that great.
They're not doing the right things.
You're blaming yourself.
Your relationship with them is strained.
You were in a bad marriage during their life and now they're just dealing with a lot of
stuff.
Come on.
You feel super sad that they had to go through the abuse that you went through in whatever
relationship you were in.
They're having behavioral problems.
Maybe they're adults and they're having relationship problems.
You see them making all the same bad mistakes you did, picking all the wrong people.
Okay.
There's quite a lot of hands up for all different types of things right now, so let's deal with
all this.
Okay.
Let's deal with all of you that didn't get married or you did and you just didn't have
any children.
Maybe you struggle with infertility.
Maybe you miscarried.
A lot of you that prayed prayers that you feel are still unanswered in this situation.
You felt that they were unanswered, but they're still unanswered.
You watched everybody else kind of get those things in life and you didn't get them.
You thought you definitely would be married and have children by now.
Mother's Day is incredibly isolating for you because you're grieving something that you
always thought would happen and didn't happen.
God wants us to acknowledge that, you guys.
We have to acknowledge that grief tonight.
We're not going to pretend we're fine about it.
We're going to acknowledge it.
it so that we can get freed from it.
Because a lot of times it doesn't just show up as grief, it shows up as shame.
You feel shamed that you didn't have any children.
You feel bitter.
You feel like you're stuck in a comparison, especially for those of you that have siblings
that have children.
You're the only sibling maybe in the family, doesn't have any children, isn't married.
You feel disappointed with yourself, like, what's wrong with me?
What happened with me?
You're probably disappointed at some level with God, even if you don't want to admit
it.
I just want to let you know tonight, you need to know that your value was never defined
by one role called mother or one role called married.
I'm not saying that you're not going to be married.
I believe you will be.
I believe that's why you're here.
And I believe for everyone who wants to parent, mother or father, I believe that there are
lots of children that need that.
And if you will let go of what you feel like it needs to look like in order to be that
promise to be fulfilled, God will fulfill it.
I had one student, you guys, she wanted that more than anything.
I think she wanted the baby more than she wanted the marriage even.
She just always wanted to be a mom.
Her name's Angela and she was one of my first students in this program.
So back in 2020, and she had a dream one night.
During the early stages of this program, we did a lot of supernatural work just like we're
doing right now.
And she had a dream.
And in the dream, this cousin of hers that she hadn't seen in years, and she really didn't
have any contact with.
In the dream, this cousin was pregnant.
And this cousin was pregnant under bad circumstances and couldn't keep the baby.
And she was asked to take this baby in this dream.
So she woke up from that dream and it felt really real, really real.
And she asked me, hey, you know, what do you think about this dream?
And I said, I think it actually could be prophetic.
So she contacted her mom and said, hey, mom, this cousin was her mom's sister's daughter.
So she contacted her mom and said, hey, mom, have you talked to aunt so-and-so anytime
lately?
You know, what's, what's going on with, with my cousin so-and-so?
And she said, no, I haven't.
She said, I have no updates at all.
You know, she's not really close to that sister.
She hasn't really talked to her.
And so Angela tells her mom about the dream.
So her mom contacts the sister and just says, hey, you know, just reaching out, just catching
up.
How are you doing?
How's the family?
And then the sister proceeds to tell her that this cousin is pregnant.
She's pregnant by like a one night stand, like she's pregnant by like a bad situation.
I forget all the details.
They're not important.
And so the mom relays it back to Angela, yeah, you know, she really is pregnant in real life.
And Angela's like, wow, that's crazy.
So after this cousin has the baby, exactly what happened in the dream happens in real
life.
They ask Angela because she's always wanted children.
She doesn't have any.
If she wants to adopt this child, like just adopt this child right from the birth.
And so guess what?
She became a mom that fast through a family member.
And her story is that she had a hysterectomy pretty young, even though she was in her forties.
You know, she could have probably still had a biological child, but she had a lot of health
issues that were not going to allow that to happen.
Crazy, right?
And I just say that to say this to you, that if you will allow God, if you'll surrender
the pen in this area of motherhood, and you really just allow God to write the rest of
the story, I don't mean kind of allow it, really allow it.
God will do things that will just blow your mind.
He will.
He will do things that blow your mind.
And I know that people think that you can only really truly attached to something that
has come from your own body.
And I'm here to tell you that's not true.
As someone who has bonus children that came from another woman's womb that I have raised
since they were nine and 11 years old, and now they are 31 and 29, I am telling you that
is absolutely a hundred percent a lie.
They are just as much my flesh and blood as any baby that came from me, which was just
For those of you that know Reagan, Thursday prayer leader, come on guys.
You are still so deeply valuable regardless of your womb.
Your value was never in your womb.
You are so deeply valuable, ladies, as a mother.
There are people for you to mother.
There are children for you to mother if that is what you seek and desire.
You are valuable and I can't convince you of that.
Only you can decide to believe it, but your story is still unfolding.
It's not over.
It's only over if you want it to be.
It's only if you want to go sit in traffic like our friend James and tell yourself that
that's the only place that you have to be.
No one can stop you.
If you choose to believe a lie, no one can stop you, but just because you believe it
does not make it true.
That broke my heart today and I had to release my friend James.
There's nothing more I can do.
He said he would meet me back down at the hospital at five o'clock because the social
worker said that if he came back, they would check him back in and they would finish the
process because he left against medical advice, AMA.
He told me he'd meet me at five.
I went, I waited, I waited.
He didn't show up.
I went home.
Friends, who's waiting for you to release these wounds and to come into your right mind
and into your rightful identity?
Who's waiting for you?
There's somebody waiting for you.
It could be your spirit mate.
It could be your children.
It could be your future children and grandchildren.
And I'm not talking about the ones that just come from your body.
There are two four-year-olds that live in Columbus, Ohio, that call me Nona.
They share no DNA with me, but you know what they do share with me?
Heart.
They called me today on FaceTime.
Happy Mother's Day, Nona.
We can't wait to come to your house.
We're going to have so much fun.
We love you.
We miss you.
Uh-huh.
I share no DNA with them.
Zero DNA.
But I'm their grandma.
And trust me, they know who loves them, and it's Nona.
Nona.
And trust me, they know who loves them, and it's Nona.
Come on, you guys.
Who's waiting for you?
Is there some child waiting to call you Nona or Mimi or Gigi or whatever the heck you want to be?
Granny?
Grandma?
Mom?
Who's waiting for you?
Are you going to sit in traffic?
What are you going to do?
Are you going to keep living like this?
I know the people that came before you lived this way, but it's not disloyal for you to have a better life than them.
It's not unfaithful for you to have a better life than them.
It's not about condemnation, you guys.
It's just about a wake-up call.
Sometimes we need something to wake us up.
For some of you, tonight's going to be a turning point.
You're going to forgive the people that didn't know how to do any better than what they did.
They were all the mother that they could be.
They couldn't have been any better of a mother than they were.
That is the best that they could do.
You guys, I know we say all the time, if they wanted to, they would.
I know that we say that.
And sometimes in dating, it's kind of true.
And I'm not saying I don't believe that, but I am saying this.
It's not always true.
Some people really do want to be something different and they just can't.
They don't have the tools.
They don't have the healing.
It's not sustainable for them.
But guess what you have?
You have the tools.
You have the access.
Gentlemen, some of you are horribly avoidantly attached.
I've watched you go through this over and over again, and it's because you do not trust
women.
You do not feel like you can be vulnerable.
You're so afraid of disappointing a woman.
You're so afraid of disappointing a woman, and what women become when they're disappointed.
They become harsh.
They become judgmental.
They become critical when they're disappointed.
And because of this, you will not choose a woman.
You are single because you will not choose a woman because you are afraid that you are
not going to be enough for her.
Now, that's not what you think you're afraid of.
You think that she's just not the right one, that the circumstances just aren't right.
She doesn't live close enough, or she's not tall enough, or she's not thin enough, or
she's not young enough, or she's, you know, I don't feel attracted to her when I'm around
her.
Well, yeah, it's hard to feel attracted when you're scared.
And you're dealing with this, and you're dealing with it because you're trying to avoid rejection.
You're trying to avoid disappointing people and letting people down.
And then those same people being bitter or wounded.
And so it's easy just to, you know, never be attracted or to never think it's the right
circumstances or to never actually choose.
God wants to deliver of you of that.
So right now, let's just say that we forgive the mothers, the grandmothers, the stepmothers,
the ex-wives, the female leaders, the teachers, the friends, the authority figures that were
female who hurt us knowingly or unknowingly.
Go ahead and write their name down.
Go ahead and speak their name out.
We forgive these women who wounded us.
We repent for having resentment towards women just in general.
We release them from the debts that they owe us.
And God, we are asking for a deep release from fear, from bitterness, from people-pleasing,
from hyper-independence, from self-protection, from striving.
I'm going to look at the comments, Candy, so if you want to take it for a little while,
I'm going to pray into what I feel needs to happen.
Wow, this has been so great.
I have what's highlighted to me right now is what Jackie said about God loves us.
And I've heard the word shame.
He loves us so much.
His thoughts, as Jackie said on Saturday, are as many as the sand and the stars.
He wants to be a mother and a father to us, maybe that we didn't have.
Yeah.
And our identity is not secure.
We're not secure in our identity by a perfect parent or a parent that did a great job or
us being a perfect parent or having a child.
I love that.
And I love what Jackie said about release and be at peace.
Can we release that person, those people, the mom, the dad, even ourselves, if we need
to do some self-forgiveness as well.
We're trying to get our needs met or our identity in the wrong thing or a person.
That's what was highlighted to me.
Our value is not based on performing.
And can we leave, can we leave this call by releasing, release and be at peace?
Yes, we can.
Just like Jackie said that she was encountered after Saturday, on Saturday, she was encountered
and God healed her.
Who wants to be healed?
What was just recalled in my mind was when Jesus said at the pool, he said, do you want
to be healed?
He just kept asking, do you want to be healed?
It was a question for him to answer and make a decision.
And it's sad to me that the homeless young man didn't say yes at that moment.
I pray that he comes back.
But who wants to say yes?
If you want to put it in the chat, say yes.
I want to be healed.
I want to be healed right now.
Holy spirit is here.
Like Jackie said, angel, holy spirit is right here.
He's a person.
He's right there in your living room.
He's right there inside of you.
He knows the journey.
We could share our journeys and we have, thank God for Jackie and this community had a lot
of heart healing.
Thank you, God.
Let's break off.
You guys, anything that has been spoken to you and sometimes, you know, parents are trying
to keep us, you know, they think that they're trying to keep us, mothers are trying to especially
keep us from pain.
So they may say stuff like, hey, you know, stop being so sloppy or, you know, stand up
straight or act like a lady.
They might say to their sons, you know, stop being a little baby or, you know, be a man
or whatever.
I want you to put in the chat something that, you know, some label, maybe something, some
phrase that you're leaving behind tonight that you're being delivered of some kind of
thing that was spoken over you, whether it's a label, a word, a criticism, a description
of you that's not accurate, that was given to you by some female in your life.
You know, possibly your ex-wife, gentlemen, called you a narcissist.
Guess what?
You're not a narcissist.
That's a very, very specific personality disorder and less than 1% of the population has it.
But people call people narcissists because they're emotionally unavailable or they work
too much or they didn't, you know, say I love you or, you know, just it gets thrown around
so much.
It's ridiculous.
Okay.
So come on, let's put it in there.
Maybe you got that called that by your mom.
Maybe you were called like that you were spoiled or it was said that, you know, you're vain.
My mom used to say that to me.
I loved fashion and things and she'd be like, you just think that you're just so great.
You just, you're so vain.
You're so conceited, which of course I'm not at all, but that made me feel really self-conscious.
Now I was just walking around like, oh, nobody look at me.
Nobody think about me or, and I don't want to look nice because, you know, I'm just don't
want to be a vain person.
So dramatic.
There you go.
Come on.
And I really want to challenge those of you that have spoken things over your children
because you're used to verbal abuse.
You were very verbally abused by your mother.
And so you became a verbally abusive mother.
You called your children names.
I want you to repent of that tonight and I want you to be healed of it.
Some of you even did it in the chat.
You described your children using words that are unkind and I'm not judging you and I'm
not condemning you, but I hope that you can see what's happening.
It doesn't matter even if you think it's true about your child, you're their mother.
You're the last person who should use your words to tear them down.
You've got to use your words to build them up.
You got to ask God to help you see the best in them.
You're their mother.
Come on.
Stop calling your kids selfish.
Stop saying things about your kids that are bad.
Call them up into their identity.
Call the gold out in them.
Yeah, so many, so many things.
Look at all this stuff.
So many, so many things, you guys.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry that your mother said things like this to you.
It's so painful and also so not true.
But once again, you're the only person who can decide that this stuff isn't true.
You're the only person who can decide that you're not going to sit in a victimhood, that
you're not going to sit in, you know, in shame.
Let's make some declarations.
I will not build my identity around what wounded me.
I forgive these words that were spoken over me.
It's time for me to release and be at peace.
It's time for me to move forward.
I release bitterness.
I release resentment.
I release shame.
And I will not pass down what was passed down to me.
I will be the healed person in my bloodline.
I will.
I will be the healed person in my bloodline.
Guys, one of the things that happened when I got that deliverance yesterday is my mom
was a phenomenal woman.
She really was.
She was physically beautiful.
She was so funny and fun.
I started actually just remembering the good things about my mom and actually seeing the
things that I'm carrying inside of myself that are like her, being fun, being funny,
being fun.
I mean, I am much funnier than her if we're being honest, but she's super fun.
She was like a grownup child.
That's why she worked at Disney for 27 years.
Everybody loved her.
She could win anyone over.
Winning others over was her gift.
She just was so good at making everyone feel like they were her best friend and just incredible
in so many ways.
So giving.
The reason why I care about people that are less fortunate than I am is because of her
and because of her modeling.
And actually, I can't just really remember anything bad about her.
I just feel like I've just been totally healed.
It's just crazy.
Yes, Beth.
My funness is her gift because once again, she's actually not that funny.
She is fun though.
Yes, Lord.
I want everyone to put in the chat something wonderful about your biological mother, if
you knew her at all.
Just put something.
Just put an adjective about something special about her.
All right.
Thank you.
Bye.
So beautiful.
Yes, let us not forget that our mothers or the mother figures in our life, they're just
humans.
There is people with their own problems.
There are just people with their own brokenness, there just people trying to figure out this
life just like us.
I love that memory, Rhonda, that's so fun.
So fun.
For those of you that are missing a wonderful mother that's gone on to heaven, I pray shalom,
shalom over your heart today on this day.
For those of you that are estranged from your children and you're feeling sad, you're feeling
left out and left behind because your children don't honor you and they don't respect you,
I just pray healing and restoration, rejuvenation over your family, reconciliation over your
family, that your children would have breakthrough, that they would receive healing, and that
they would be able to reconcile with you in the days to come.
For those of you that have a hole in your heart where children should be, where family
should be, Father, I pray that you would fill that space.
You said that you take the solitary and you set them in family, and so Lord, I declare
that all of the children that are solitary will be set in family.
I really want to encourage for those of you to go watch that movie, I think it's called
The Sound of Hope.
Sound of Freedom is about human trafficking.
I think it's called The Sounds of Hope or something like that.
It is made by Angel Studios as well, if I'm not mistaken, and it's about a family that
they were actually pastors of a church, they're real people, but they sparked an adoption
movement in their region, in their church, and then in their community that just changed
the whole fostering system in the small community and county that they were from.
Go watch that.
Be inspired.
Father, fill those holes in people's life with children.
I saw several of you say that you're waiting for your husbands to foster and adopt.
You don't have to do that.
Who knows?
Maybe that's how you meet your husband.
The bottom line is, is that if you have a desire to do that, there shouldn't be anything
holding you back.
Where there's God's will, there's always a way.
And last but not least, for those of you that are still sitting in prisons, like the man
at the pool of Bethesda, like my friend James, you're still sitting there waiting for someone
to come and rescue you when the rescuer is standing right in front of you.
My friend James is still, he's back on the street now, worse off than he was before because
he's in a wheelchair, at least before he had both legs working.
Now he's unhomed in a wheelchair, but he's still saying the same thing.
He's saying, I'm waiting for someone to help me.
I'm waiting.
Who's going to help me?
Why won't anyone help me?
Well, God sent you a boat, friend.
Are you going to drown?
God sent you two boats, three boats.
He sent you a helicopter.
He sent you strangers named the Dormans.
He sent you a nurse named Felicia.
He Romans 828-ed you.
He used the car that ran you over to put you in proximity to the front of the waiting list
for something that could never happen any other way.
We can judge James or we can ask God to show us how we're like him because all of us have
something that we're waiting to be rescued from when the rescuer is right in front of
us.
All of us have something that we're waiting to be healed from and delivered from.
All of us have something that we're waiting for that has already arrived.
And we can't see it because we are looking through the eyes of victim.
Come on.
There's Holy Spirit right there, right there.
Deliver us.
Deliver us from victimhood.
Clear our lens so that we can see clearly.
Let us see that we've already been rescued.
Let us see that we're already in proximity to the promise.
Let us see that we've already been given the keys to the kingdom.
Let us see that it's right here, right now, available to us.
We're not waiting anymore.
We've never been waiting, but we're certainly not waiting now.
We have access.
It's right there.
Well, Kandi's your fearless leader for Sunday nights, but I know a different version of
Kandi.
I know a version of Kandi that came in here six years ago, and she was not in a good place.
And she had some pretty messed up relationships with her mother, with her kids, and she's
not the same woman that she was.
And it's not because anything really huge shifted except for her view of what was happening.
And when her view shifted, guess what?
Everybody else shifted.
I hope you don't mind me sharing that, Kandi, because it's just amazing the miraculous change
that has happened in the relationships around you.
Hey, Jackie, can I say something really quick?
Yeah, say it.
I was just thinking that when I was coming to lead this call tonight.
I was like, I'm not the same person.
Number one, I reconciled with my brother and my sister in the last month.
Yes.
Oh, wow.
I mean, that was a wreck.
And my sister was a bully, but she apologized.
And my dad said, it's because you have changed.
It's because you have gotten so healthy and you had your boundaries.
And I just, yeah, I just, I'm so excited about what God's done and what he's going
to do.
Yes.
Amen.
Man, that's a long list of relationships that have been restored for Kandi.
She's had like five relationships restored now.
So praise God for that.
But it might not even be relationships.
It might be other things, you guys, where you have that mindset.
You have that victim mindset.
It's like that old joke that's not very funny where the guy's in the flood and he's on the
roof of the house and the boats come by to pick him up.
And he's like, oh, no, no.
You know, I prayed.
God's going to save me.
And then, you know, the other thing that comes by the helicopter, you know, and then he eventually
drowns and he goes to heaven and he's like, hey, God, why didn't you save me?
He's like, well, I sent you a boat.
I mean, it's kind of morbidly funny.
I sent you a helicopter, you know.
Come on, you guys.
Please let's not believe that we are above being blind to what's right in front of us
because we are not above it.
We're not above it.
Some of you have circumstances that you have tried to overcome and you just can't.
And I'm not referring to that right now.
I'm referring to the lie that you believe that you can't have good things because those
circumstances still exist.
You're thinking that when those circumstances go away, if they go away, that that is when
you can have nice things.
That's when you can get married.
That's when you can, you know, pay, be able to pay your bills, whatever those circumstances
may be.
It could be a health issue.
It could be a relational issue.
It can be whatever it is.
But I promise you, it doesn't, that's not holding you back.
The prison door is open.
Just walk out.
That's not holding you back.
It's not.
The anxiety is not holding you back.
The mental health diagnosis is not holding you back.
You think it is.
But it's not.
And so I want you tonight to just go ahead and claim your freedom.
Claim your freedom.
And before you go to bed tonight, I want you to pray to God, teach me, show me, heal me,
grow me.
God, I do not want to be like our brother James sitting by the pool of Bethesda when
the rescuer is standing in front of me.
I don't want my blessings to show up and for me to think that it's a trap, that it's a
prank, that it's something that I can't trust.
I don't want my spirit mate to show up and for me to have such a hard heart that I can't
let them in.
I want to receive right now in real time the blessings that you have for me.
No more self-sabotage.
No more self-limitation.
No more glass ceilings that don't exist.
In Jesus' name, amen.
Claim freedom, friends.
Claim freedom.
Some of you are going to have huge breakthroughs.
You're going to have huge breakthroughs, and they're going to manifest as promotions at
work where you think that you just were capped out because of your age.
For some of you, this is even an age thing, just like you've believed a lie that, you
know, this is as far as it goes.
Some of you are going to have relationship breakthroughs, like what Candy was talking
about, where hatchets will be buried.
Long-time feuds will just end.
No one will even remember what they were arguing about in the first place.
Some of you are no longer going to let some physical diagnosis that you've received hold
you back from going after your dreams, regardless of what it is, whatever handicap, disability,
limitation, you're just not going to do it.
I have a student who had chronic Lyme disease, almost killed her several times.
She almost died.
She got married, and she had a baby.
They told her she would never have a baby.
That baby just turned a year old.
Why?
Just because she just did.
She just decided she just was going to.
She's a professional dancer, used to be a professional cheerleader for an NBA team.
She went back to dancing.
She went back to acting.
She used to do all kinds of arts and entertainment stuff, and she just did it.
One day at a time, one step at a time, she just did it.
You can do it too.
Let go of the lie.
You're not stuck.
You don't need anyone to put you in the pool.
Yes, I have an angel right here with me.
I don't say that lightly because I'm not a woo-woo weirdo.
I just know it's true.
I've sensed this angel before, about 15 years ago.
But guess what?
You have angelic undergirding as well.
I'm not asking you to worship angels, but you can ask Holy Spirit to tell you what kind
of undergirding you have in your life right now that's helping you be successful.
What's that look like?
What are those angels here to do?
What are they there to do for you?
What kind of favor have they brought, and what kind of obstacles are they removing?
That's real stuff.
That's Bible stuff.
Go read your Bible.
I promise you it's there all over the place.
You think that that was just for those people?
We need that.
Part of the reason why we don't try to do things, part of the reason why we feel so
inadequate is because we forgot who we are and whose we are, who lives inside of us,
the Spirit that we're walking after that lives in us and is with us and dwells in us.
Like Jesus said, it's good for me to go because I'm going to send another, and he's going
to be with you and in you.
Who is that?
Holy Spirit.
Ephesians 3.20.
To him who, God, who is able to do what?
Exceedingly, abundantly, above all you can ask, think, or imagine.
By what?
The power that works in you.
Who do you think that is?
That's the Spirit.
So you have that, but then you also have these angelic messengers.
You have these angelic warriors.
If some of you could just see in the Spirit realm and see what's with you and what walks
with you, you'd stop being so scared all the time.
If you just knew.
And I want to say this right now because it's Mother's Day and we're healing mother wounds,
but some of you don't have a great relationship with the Holy Spirit because of those mother
wounds.
You're not good at being nurtured.
You're not good at being comforted.
You don't trust the ministry of Holy Spirit and you don't realize it, but it's because
you've had resentment built up against the feminine, because remember, God is both masculine
and feminine.
And for whatever reason, in my experience and in ministry for the last 29 years, the
people that had the biggest block to the Spirit were people that had the biggest mom wounds.
So pray into that.
You don't have to stay that way.
Holy Spirit is amazing, wonderful.
He is God.
You know that, right?
You will be comforted.
You will be held.
You will be nurtured.
You will be loved.
You will be counseled.
You will receive.
Steve downloads, you will receive wisdom, you will receive strategy.
I would love to let you guys go, and if you have to go, go ahead and go, but I just don't
feel a release yet.
I'm just going to just wait a couple more seconds here.
The angelic undergirding that you guys specifically have, and it is a changing of the guard.
I do believe that there are some angels that are assigned to you during your life.
That's wonderful, but there's a changing of the guard.
There's a certain angelic undergirding that comes into your life for particular seasons
and reasons, and so asking God to show you what is with you in this season of your life
and for what reason it's with you, that would be a really good prayer.
Not so that you can be weird about it and sit around and try to talk to the angels that
you can't see, no, no one's doing that, okay?
It's just helpful to know what's going on in the spirit realm.
The Bible says that we can understand.
We can seek understanding and we can gain understanding, and I think some of you just
need to understand Psalm 91.
There's angels with you, protecting you.
Some of you are afraid of this new virus that just came out, this, I don't know, Pandora
virus.
I forget what it's called.
Hantamama, antamama, I don't know, but here's the thing.
Psalm 91 says, if 1,000 fall at your side and 10,000 at your other side, the plague
will not come to you, didn't that what it says?
I read some stuff about it today, just randomly, and I was like, that sounds bad.
That sounds real bad, but again, if we only knew what's with us, isn't that what the prophet
said to God?
He said, can you open my servant's eyes so that he can see that there's more with us
than there are against us?
Isn't that a scripture?
Pray that scripture.
Say God, open your servant's eyes, meaning yourself, open your servant's eyes and let
me see that there are more with me than there are against me.
Help me to understand that I roll deep.
It's not just me out here by myself, and those of you, because you're single and you
probably do feel very solitary, but remember, God's not only placing you in community and
family like this one, where you're surrounded and defended.
This is part of your God defense system, but you also have, you know, angelic undergirding
with you.
And I don't know, I, you know, I, you guys know me for those of you that have been around
for a while.
I never talk about angels.
I just really feel like God wants me to talk about angels tonight.
And as you can see, my knowledge of this is very limited.
I just know what the Bible says.
I know what it shows.
I know that we don't need to overthink this.
We don't need to get books on it and dig into it and try to, you know, communicate with
angels or worship angels.
This is what I know.
I know that angels are part of the God defense system, and they're also part of the God delivery
system.
God uses angels to deliver things to us, okay?
To defend us, to deliver us, to walk with us, to fight for us, to clear the way, to
give us favor.
Angels bring revelation.
They bring strategy.
They bring all kinds of stuff, and it's okay for you to pray and ask, God, what are you
strategizing in my life?
What kind of protection plan is in my life right now?
Help me to feel surrounded by you, by heaven.
I know my friend James, and you guys pray for him.
Please pray for him.
I'm not mad at him.
I don't want you to think I'm mad at him.
I'm just mad at the devil, and I'm also really, really mad that this horrible victim-mindedness
is keeping him from the very thing that God is trying to bless him with, and I don't want
that for myself, and I don't want that for you.
God's trying to bless you with something right now, and your fists are closed, and I don't
want that for you, and I don't want that for me, but you know what?
The only reason James is alive is because there's angels with him.
He should not be alive.
He should have died many, many, many times.
But he didn't because he's being angelically protected, and that's true of some of you
too.
You've been in some weird situations.
You've been in some precarious situations.
Some of you have been in situations where you should have not lived, and you don't even
know.
You don't even know what you were spared or saved from.
You won't even know on this side of heaven.
You're not going to ever know.
Some evil spirit determining evil against you through a person or through a situation.
Some of you know this story because you've been around for a really long time.
But when I was a teenager, I moved to a new town to live with my biological dad.
After failed girl's home and failed foster situations, I tried to live with my biological
dad for three months.
It didn't work out.
He kicked me out.
But during that time frame, I was new to this town.
It was kind of a rough scene.
I went over a friend's house from school, my only friend that I met at school.
I went over their house, and there were some other people there.
And long story short, I got kidnapped by a gang.
Now, they didn't like, you know, put a blindfold on me and stick me in a trunk or something.
They just very persuasively, like, hey, you don't have a choice, had me get in the car
and go with them.
And while I was in the car, I was 16 years old, while I was in the car with five huge
dudes.
One of the guys in the backseat started to take his pants off because he was going to
force me to, you know, you know.
And I don't even know what language I would be able to use right now, but you understand
what was going to happen here.
And you guys, when I tell you, and I didn't know Jesus, and I tell you that the craziest
calm came over me.
What was that?
That was an angel.
The craziest calmness came over me.
Instead of freaking out, screaming, and yelling, and trying to jump out of the car, I got really
calm and I began to say things that made no sense to my human mind.
I started saying things like, hey, you know, why don't we just wait till we get back to
the house?
You know, come on, baby, not here, not like.
I started talking crazy, y'all.
And he's like, oh, yeah, yeah, girl, yeah, you know, that's good, that's good.
So they were taking me to like their gang house.
And right before we got there, this is a true story, we were in the outskirts.
And as soon as we came into the town and we went down the street, we turned the corner
and the whole street, this is 10 o'clock at night, the whole street was filled with people.
All kinds of people were out in the street.
And the driver of the car rolled down his window, he's like, what's going on?
Their house had been shot up by a drive-by shooting.
And so all of them, they barely even put the car in park, they jumped out of that car so
fast and they ran into this mob of people.
They ran, they jumped out of the car, they ran into the mob of people.
And when they did that, I started running like crazy.
I jumped out of that car and I just started running in the direction of my dad's house.
I was far away.
I was a couple of miles from it.
But I was also almost six feet tall and an athlete at 16 years old.
I was running and running.
And one of them, the guy who had been in the back seat next to me who had started to take
his pants off, he saw me take off and start running and he started chasing me.
But guess what?
He was too fat and he could not catch me.
He could not catch me.
I was a gingerbread man.
There was no catching me if you can.
But you guys, I didn't know Jesus and I was just like, whoa, you know, that's amazing.
I escaped.
God knows what.
Okay?
Gang rape, probably.
But I will tell you this, when I became a believer at 22, so like six years later when
I became a believer, I remembered that and I was like, oh my God, you saved me.
That was you.
But it was angelic.
You guys, it was angelic.
So I don't know why God wants you to be just aware in this season of angelic help and assistance,
but he does want you to be aware of it.
I feel it so strongly.
Candy, do you feel it too?
Do I lose her?
Absolutely.
I do.
Okay.
Do you have anything to add to the angel conversation?
Oh, absolutely.
Yeah.
Okay.
Go ahead.
You know, I'm in the Dan McCollum trainer school again, so there's a, yeah.
Thank you, Lord.
I could have my good friend, Dan, come and teach on angels, but you add what you got.
Well, thank you, Lord.
First, I just want to sit here for a second.
Thank you.
We acknowledge your presence.
We acknowledge your angelic, the angels.
Thank you, Lord.
Let's just sit here for a sec.
Wow.
It's so thick.
Wow.
Okay, so here's what I feel led to say.
I have angels on my property, and God has shown me what they look like.
They look like soldiers that are at the castle in England with the black and the red, you
know, soldiers, and they've never moved.
They're just there, right?
I know they're there.
They're protecting me.
So what I feel also led to say is let's make sure we're aware.
Let's make sure that we're cognizant.
Let's make sure that we are acknowledging the angel protection.
And Psalm 91 is what's highlighted mostly to me.
Yes, I agree.
A prayer that I have prayed every day for I don't know how long now is in Revelation,
and it says, by the word of my testimony and the blood of the lamb, I and my family and
my property and their property and this community are protected.
The enemy cannot touch us.
And it says that we have everything that Psalm 91 says.
We are hidden under the shadow of the Almighty.
No foe can withstand because of the word of our mouth, the blood of the lamb and the word
of our testimony and believing it.
We believe it and we receive it.
That's it.
We believe it.
We receive it.
We acknowledge it.
Jackie, did you want to say something else?
No, I was just saying, I agree.
I agree with all that.
I agree with everything that you're saying right now.
I agree with it.
I'm coming to agreement with it.
You asked what revelation.
So it is and I would love to read it actually.
I have it memorized at this point.
Go ahead and read it.
You can.
I'm at my mom's so I'm slow to get my verse, but I'm getting it.
Okay.
We overcame him by the blood of the lamb, it's revelation 12, 11.
And by the word of their testimony, y'all come on Jackie's testimony, my testimony,
our test.
We all have a testimony and they loved not their lives.
It goes on to, you know, to some other things.
But the main key is we overcame, we've he's already, the enemy's already defeated.
I'm just saying it out loud.
And when I say it out loud and I mean it, it's true.
It's true.
And also, you know what else with that is I'm not only protected and we're not only
protected, but we're healed.
We're delivered and we're set free.
I love what you said.
And I'm feeling that we're protected and directed.
This is how we get direction.
This is how, you know, you think that, Oh, you know, I think I'm just going to go to
Chick-fil-A today and you know, I haven't been there in a while and I'm just having
a hankering for some Chick-fil-A, you know, that could be angelic assistance.
That could be what that is.
Okay.
Holy spirit leading you, angels directing you, you know, divine appointments happening.
I can't tell you how many times I've been in the right place at the right time.
Weird stuff.
And it's always that.
I've had so many encounters.
Just in the last, like, I don't know, six months, like almost every day.
So thank you, God, for the presence.
Your presence is so, it's 100% tangible right now.
It's open heaven, y'all.
Ask.
The thing that separates us from the dimensions, you guys, I'm just, I have nothing.
I have no proof of this.
I have never heard this before, but I'm telling you, I feel Holy Spirit saying that it's
very thin right now.
It's very thin.
What separates us from the dimension, we're all our loved ones, some of your mothers that
have gone on, like my mothers, all the people that we love, the whole angelic realm, all
the things, what separates the dimensions, you know, from us, like just being in that
dimension, the separate dimensions, is very, very thin right now.
There's lots of angelic activity right now.
And I don't just mean right now tonight.
I mean, right now in this season, lots of angelic activity, lots of intercessions happening.
There's lots of supernatural stuff happening.
For those of you, I know Michael was a missionary.
He still feels called to missions.
A lot of you missionary-minded people, you go overseas, you see all kinds of crazy miracle
signs and wonders, and these places where it's thin, there's thinness for whatever reason
between the supernatural dimensions.
For whatever reason, America, there's just been a huge block to the supernatural.
There's just been a huge block.
I feel like there's been a lot of opposition.
There's also just been a lot of obstacles for whatever reason, but it's thin.
I can feel it.
It's thin.
And so we're going to see all kinds of miracle signs and wonders in America.
We're going to see the kind that we only see when we go overseas, where people's legs grow
and people's eyeballs come back into their sockets.
My good friend that I know personally, that used to be my pastor, literally prayed for
someone and saw them grow an eyeball right in front of his eyes.
He's not lying, friends.
He's not making it up.
I know him personally.
He's seen so many things.
He's raised several people from the dead in other countries, but I'm telling you, I just
feel it.
I feel that there's a shift that's happening and there's just a thinness.
I can't explain it any other way.
I don't even have language for it.
I couldn't even give you language for it.
If you get in the spirit with me right now and you don't think that I'm kooky and crazy,
you will also feel, you won't need me to give you language because you'll feel what I'm
feeling right now.
It's not just for tonight.
It's a thinness.
Sorry.
I feel like it's in the mind.
Like my, my head is on fire.
Yeah.
I feel like something going on.
you said about declaring, like break the lie off and then declare and decree the truth.
My, my whole head is just literally on fire.
So if you want a renewed mind, take it, take it.
He's doing something.
Yes, yes, yes.
We declare that right now.
Kandi's mom was supposed to pass away years ago, but she didn't.
She had all kinds of stuff going on with her head.
Kandi had stuff going on with her lungs.
I've had all kinds of stuff going on.
There's been all kinds of different things.
Different people have been healed right on these calls.
One of our guys got healed.
One of our ladies got healed.
Clean bill of health kind of healings, like, you know, whatever was going on is gone.
Like, you know, you know, catastrophic diseases, all the different things, whatever, but not
just that.
You guys, not just physical healing, but also being able to tangibly encounter God.
I really want to encourage you when you get off this call, just take some time to pray.
If you have your prayer language, pray in it.
If you don't, just walk around.
Don't just stay, don't just stay still.
Walk around.
I have this carpet, the toucan carpet in my, in my dining room.
I'm on it right now.
I'm walking around in circles.
Just walk and just, and just pray.
If you don't have your prayer language, just pray, say, God, I'm listening.
I'm your servant.
Open my eyes.
Show me that there are more with me than there are against me.
God doesn't care if you're repetitive.
You don't have to figure out some great stuff to say to God.
Ask him about what we're talking about right now.
Jackie said there's a thinness.
She doesn't know what that means.
I don't know what that means.
God, show me what that means.
Show me how that impacts me.
Show me what angels are assigned to me in this season.
What are they doing in my life?
Tell me, show me, teach me, grow me.
Come on, you guys.
thinness. I get so frustrated. I drive the streets and I see all these elderly people
that are homeless and there's nothing I can do. I feel so powerless and I feel so helpless.
I give them 20 bucks here and there and I'll take them some food or whatever, but I can't
solve this problem. I feel like we're in a thin place where supernatural stuff's going
to start happening. For all these things that we've been so concerned about that are way
out of our control. Supernatural stuff. Supernatural vision and provision. Supernatural miracles.
And I don't mean just little miracles. It was a miracle that my brother is finally not
homeless and he has a home and that's great and wonderful, but I don't want just that.
I want him to be fully in his right mind. I want him to be restored to family and to
his children. I want him to be someone his children admire and look up to. I want all
the gifts and talents of his youth because he was so talented when we were kids. I remember
being so envious of him because he could do anything and he was good at everything. I
want it to be restored to him. I want him to be able to have a livelihood that he is
respected for and to be a person that he is not ashamed of. Why not? Why can't that happen?
It would be a miracle. It would be a miracle of miracles. It's then, you guys. Father,
we just lean into you right now as we end our time together. Everyone is going to go
off into their separate places and I pray, God, that there be a stirring. You're stirring
just like the angel stirring the water. That same angel that stirred the water at Bethesda
is here walking this carpet with me right now. I just want to say right now that their
water is being stirred right now. The sound of my voice, Lord, is stirring the water,
Lord, inside of them. It's stirring them up. It's stirring up things that are inside of
them. The dormant things are becoming alive inside of them. Desires and ideas are coming
alive. Passion is coming alive. Hunger is coming alive right now inside of them. Inside
of them, they're being stirred up. They're being stirred up. They're being stirred up.
They don't want status quo. They're not going to sit anymore in victimhood. They're not
going to sit and just look at everybody else having what it is that they want and never
reaching out for it, never believing that they can have it. They're not going to do
that anymore. They're not going to. They're going to break through. They're going to break
free. Freedom. We just declare freedom right now, but not just freedom for the moment,
but freedom for momentum. There is going to be an understanding of the thinness that
we're all experiencing right now in this season. There's a thinness, and we can understand
what the thinness means in our lives. We can move in the Spirit like we never have before.
We can have supernatural movement of heaven flowing through our lives and our circumstances.
We can have it. We can have it. It belongs to us. We can have it, and it's here right
now. It's available to us. We declare it, Laura. We declare it. We thank you for it.
Stir them up, Lord. Stir them up, Lord. Break all the lies off of them that are keeping
them sitting in the traffic, God. Break all the lies off of them that are keeping them
from being able to activate whatever it is right now that you're activating in them,
all of them being activated right now. You guys, this is a very unusual call. There's
only 81 of us on here. I know that there's going to be people available, this available
for people in replay because I did hit record at the beginning, but we've all almost been
on here for two hours. We don't usually do this, but I'm telling you, there is something
that's changed. There is something that is shifted. There is a great amount. I've walked
with Jesus for almost 30 years. I'll celebrate 30 years in the summertime, and I'm telling
you right now, I have never, ever felt this amount of angelic movement. The angels are
on the move. I don't think that you understand how many of them there are. I don't think
that you understand how many of them there are. The sheer numbers of heaven, the host
of heaven is much greater than you think it is. For some reason, there's a great amount
of movement that we can actually sense and feel. A lot of it, it goes under the radar
of the humans. Some of us have gifts where we can see and sense into the spirit realm
like my friend Deanno that Candy was talking about, and that's great. But for most of us,
those movements go undetected. Yes, God's still working through angel assistance. We
just aren't aware of it at all. But I'm telling you, the awareness right now
is, like, level 10.
And I'm not someone who feels this kind of stuff.
I'm not a feeler.
That's not what I do.
That's not my gift.
I feel it.
I know that it's true, and I know that it's very, very thin, so I'm asking you to press
through into it for your own sake and for whatever it is that God's doing.
But the angels, they're moving.
Things are moving right now.
And we've got to be part of that, okay, in our individual lives and as a company of people
together.
All right?
So, Father God, help us to move with it, Lord.
Help us to move with it.
Sorry about that.
Can I say something really, really quick?
Yes.
And I am going to have that angel teaching, you guys, because this isn't just for tonight.
It's not like it's going to end tonight.
Don't worry.
It's not going to just end after tonight.
We're just sensing it.
God's just bringing us into the revelation of it, but it's not ending.
Yeah, go ahead, Candy, and then we're going to go ahead and close.
Yeah.
When you were praying, Jackie, I saw the blood of Jesus on everybody.
So I just thank you for that, Lord, that blood that covers us from head to toe and covers
this.
Wow.
I just feel it and I see it.
But I also wanted to say that I had an encounter once when I was on a Zoom call, long story
short, and there was an angel on my shoulder.
And one of the global students said, I didn't tell them, and they said, I see an angel on
your shoulder.
And I said, I know, because I could feel it.
And the angel literally pulled me up in the spirit.
I could feel myself being pulled up in the spirit.
So there's more to that story, but things like that have happened to me a lot in the
last five or six years.
And so I just want to say it's real, y'all, and it's wonderful.
And I just thank you, Lord, for you dispatching your angels into every single person's lives
and our families as well.
Thank you, God.
Amen.
All right, you guys, go with God.
We'll pick this up on prayer all week long.
I'll tell the prayer leaders.
I'll talk to Dano about possibly coming and talking to us more about, you know, pressing
into whatever this is.
I'm going to tell him what it is that I've been feeling.
And I just, like I said, thinness is the only word that I have to describe it.
But you guys, it's just so available for everyone, even the non-feelers to feel and to just get
into alignment and agreement with.
Remember, the way that you agree with the angels is just by speaking the word of God.
Speaking the word of God, you guys, you don't have to speak to the angels.
You don't have to try to command the angels.
You just speak the word of God over your life.
So start speaking the promises God has given you.
Start speaking what you learned tonight.
Start declaring things.
That is how you come into agreement with all angelic activity from heaven.
I love you guys.
We'll see you soon.