Hi ladies. Welcome. Happy Monday evening. Thank you, Amanda, letting me know. Glad you're
still here with us. Welcome for another heartwork session. This is what we call our heart check-ins.
I normally just call them heartwork live sessions, but heart check-in is the same thing. So if
you're wondering, they are the same. If you did not meet me before, I'm Bethany Cooper.
I'm one of the master heartwork coaches here in our community. So glad to have you joining
us tonight. Do we have anyone that this is your first live session? You've never been
here with us before. I'll probably ask this again later if we have a bunch more ladies
jump on. Anyone brand new? Welcome back to all my ladies rejoining. So good to see all
of y'all again. Oh, I don't know, Debra. I don't hear an echo. Does anyone else hear
an echo? Okay. Debra, it might just be like you might be getting feedback based on how
you have your tech set up potentially. Because sometimes that'll happen for me on occasion
when someone else is unmuted and they're talking, I might have my mic set up like the volume
on my mic a little loud. Yeah. But welcome. So glad to have you guys here with us. Hopefully
you had a wonderful 4th of July weekend. I know that holidays can always be kind of tricky
depending on what your support system looks like. And so if you guys had a hard time navigating
that, please do let us know if there's anything we can do to help you coach through any dynamics
you encountered. Some people have a really hard time going around family and all of those
kind of things. I want to just remind you all, I love to do this reminder in our housekeeping
because this is so relevant in our culture, the whole FOMO, like the fear of missing out
on something, right? And so the reason I try to bring it up in the HeartWork is that
sometimes what can happen is people will join the HeartWork program. They'll sign up to
say they're going to start the program, they're going to do the course, and then they'll hear
about something else, another course, another Bible study. They'll hear about something
going on with their sisters and they just, you know, not knocking that we need to spend
time with our friends or our family and things like that. And maybe at some point do another
course, but a lot of times the enemy will try to distract us with the fear of missing
out on other things and we'll feel this need to act on something else right now. But the
reality is, is God isn't going to ask us to sign up for things that like take us in opposite
directions y'all, okay? So I really want you all to pray into, even in your own life outside
of the HeartWork, how often is the enemy bringing things even that are good, okay?
Because they can both be really good things. But what's the best thing in this season?
I want you to think about what is your best yes in this season as you're here. I believe
it's for you all to do the HeartWork, which is why God led you here. But again, so often
we get distracted and we get off course with things that come our way. I've done it myself
as well at times. And so really want to encourage you to try to avoid the next shiny thing.
You know, that's kind of the same thing as FOMO, like the next shiny thing pops up and
we're afraid we're missing out. Or, you know, even as you're kind of journeying through,
sometimes the guy that's the, what I want to say, the sexiest might not be the best
guy for you, okay? So let's just put it in that terms too. So as you're going through,
I want to encourage you to think of this quote. God spoke this to me through someone else.
Honestly, I had the little quote in the person's name for the longest time set up by my computer
area and I don't know where that is right now. So this is not my quote, so I cannot
take credit for it, but it really ministered to me. And I saw this quote even after I was
already married. But as some of you all, I've kind of been talking about this a little bit
during our heartwork sessions. We have been wanting to get pregnant and sometimes just
struggling with that. And this is what the quote says. I'm the perfect age for everything
God has for me right now. I'm the perfect age for everything that God has for me right
now. The reality is if we partner with, I missed out, I wasted all those years. This
is never going to happen for me. This isn't the way I want it to be. Those things might
somewhat be true as far as this might not be how we thought it would unfold. We might
not have thought we were going to get married and get divorced. We might not have thought
we would never be married. Some of you all in your 40s, 50s, 60s, maybe older, some of
you have gone through betrayal, whatever. Maybe some of you have lost spouses, whatever
the dynamic is that you've gone through. The reality is, is that God is holding all things
in his hands, and he can work everything together for good.
Okay.
So if you partner with, I am the perfect age for everything God has for me right
now, I believe it'll help you shift out of that fear posture of like times running
out, which can lead so many of us to even step into dating with the panic button
mode on the inside, every person we meet, we're, we're like, especially if we want
a baby, like if you're, you know, in that age and you're still wanting that, we can
kind of have this anxiousness, like we're looking for the man that's going to be
our, not only our husband, but our baby daddy.
And we're just, you know, that internal stuff, y'all that translates through when
we're showing up to even just get to know a guy.
So the more that we heal on the inside and trust in God's perfect timing, the
more that we can just show up and be in a place of peace and really not let a lot
of things distract us to find the person that God has for us.
Amy, happy birthday tomorrow.
Turning 50.
That's awesome.
My husband turned 50 this year, big birthday.
That's so awesome.
All right.
Put in the chat and let us know what you're doing to celebrate.
And the last housekeeping I have for you is Supernatural Saturday,
doubly free and locked in.
Are you doubly free and locked in, in this season?
Are you locked in for what God has for you in the next six months?
It was just reminding me too, how fast time can go, right?
I feel like we just blinked and it had just turned 2026.
I literally said to someone, I can't already believe it's, it's today is July
6th already, you all, right?
So we're already four days into the second half of the year.
So let's make it the best that we can make it.
All right.
Let me pray for us.
Father, thank you so much for all that you have for us.
I thank you, God, that you would help us to hear a fresh man, a word from
heaven tonight, that you would meet each lady right where she's at.
God, those that are here live, those that are going to watch the replay, God,
that you would help them to connect with you, to have divine inspiration, to
bring things out of darkness into the light, help them to see themselves
the way that you see them, God.
We thank you that you are renewing and transforming our minds that
all things are passing away.
And behold, everything is becoming new.
God, let us not fear because fear is false evidence appearing real, but help
us to become more and more grounded in your love because your love is what,
what you declare perfect love, cast out all fear because fear has to do with
torment, help us to partner with the truth that you're a good father who
brings good gifts to your children, including us, we thank you for all that
you're going to do in our hearts and our lives.
Um, we thank you for supernatural breakthrough and healing and
release tonight in Jesus name.
Amen.
Tonight, we are talking about the real you.
Um, some of you are just now let's also do this.
Cause a couple more ladies have joined.
I just want to make sure.
Is there anyone here?
That's for your first time tonight.
You've never been on a live session before anyone brand new.
Let me know in the chat, um, tonight we're talking.
So Melissa, welcome for your first time.
That's awesome.
Hello.
So glad to have you here with us.
All right.
Is Audrey, Adriana new?
I think too.
Maybe she's raising her hand.
Welcome.
So excited to have you all here.
All right.
So the real you, for those of you that are brand new, this is content from week
five in the book, um, and the coursework, but I don't want you to worry because
the way that our program is built as we coach on whatever topic we are coaching
on for that week, no matter what week you're on.
So the, what I try to encourage our ladies that are brand new when I coach
on the real you is that you, and even for our ladies that have been here for a
while, sometimes y'all may not feel this way yet, but the, the great thing is
that the seeds are getting planted.
And as I said, just in that quote, you're the perfect age for everything right now.
You're in the right moment at the right time right now.
So God intended for you to be here tonight at this time with this session
and to receive what you need for your particular heart healing journey.
And so, um, I just always try to encourage those of you that are new,
because sometimes people can feel like, well, I don't feel like any of those
things yet, and that's okay because we grow into this more and more,
no matter what week we're on.
Okay.
So encouraging you all to give yourself a lot of grace, the real you.
What does that even mean?
So when we talk about the real you in this community, your true God given
identity, that's what we're talking about.
They mean the same thing.
And so I want you to think about, and most of us don't know what this is yet,
really, but when God created you, by the way, he was so excited the day
He was creating you. He was so happy. He was so joy-filled when he was creating you.
You may or may not believe that, but it is true. He thought about you. He predestined and put
things in you that he wanted to specifically be planted and used so that you could bring
the God colors out into the world, the way that only you can. And this is true.
So as God was creating you and he's super happy and he's full of love and he's putting all these
amazing things in you and in us, that is the moment when everything that was like your true
identity, the fullness of who God originally created you to be, those moments before trauma
and wounds ever entered your life. So this is like, most of us don't even know that person yet,
but we will. And the more that we grow in our healing, the more that we step into understanding
God and his character and all of his truth, you know, greater upgrades and revelation come every
single day if we're posturing for that. But God wants to take you further and further into the
fullness of who he originally created you to be. So when you all hear me say that to you during
lives or even in a response in a text, the reason I'm saying that is because I want you to remember
that you're growing as you're going. This isn't like a, I got to get to some destination and if
I don't get there by a certain time, like I'm not good enough. No, this is about us growing as we're
going, like to continue to keep moving and knowing that God will continue to heal us as we go, as we
keep seeking him for that. So I want you to think about this question. Who told you that you were naked?
And what I mean specifically by that is that, you know, we're going to go into the Genesis
chapter 3 story here for just a moment. Verse 8 through 11, this is what it says.
Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the
cool of the day and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God
called to the man, where are you? Adam answered, I heard you in the garden and I was afraid
because I was naked. So I hid. Verse 11, God saying back to Adam, who told you that you were naked?
Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you to not eat from? And I love to pose this question
because this is something that God actually spoke to me personally. When he was giving me some
healing and revelation, he started talking to me about, you know, who told you that? Who told you
that? You know, this whole, who told you you were naked? Who told me that I had to be afraid, if you
will, of God in the garden? You know, that even the worst parts of myself, that I don't have to hide
those from him, but the enemy tries to cause us to believe that we do. So if you're battling with
shame or guilt or condemnation, like this is an amazing scripture for you to consider.
Adam and Eve hid. Well, why? Think about it. Because they were feeling shame the first time
ever in the Bible, that shame appears. But God goes on, if you all, you know, continue to read
that story, he not only calls them out, but he covers them. Right? So I want you to think about
that as you're in the heart healing process. Like some of you all, God is going to ask you to do a
post and get really vulnerable with some things that you've been struggling with, things that you
want to leave behind, things that you don't want to carry into tomorrow with you. And I want to
encourage you to not be afraid to allow people to see you, like to see even the hard parts and to
allow yourself to experience for maybe the first time for some of you ever to be fully seen and
fully loved and accepted without judgment. That is what happens in this community over and over and
over again. I've had women confess things that they've not confessed to anyone else. And I want
you to know that this is a safe space for you. If that is something that God leads you to do,
I want you to know we're going to care for you. And we're going to encourage you to heal and grow
from that. But this is a place where you can express that if that does apply to you at any time.
I want to encourage you in the coming out of hiding, the showing up fully in the world. Well,
how do we become the real us? Well, we learn how to actually not hide parts of ourselves.
And even right now, I hear the Lord saying, like, there's parts of some of you where,
you know, you were, I just keep seeing someone singing. I don't know if any of you all,
maybe you love to sing as a kid and someone said something to you and you just started
shutting down your voice, um, I feel like you're going to sing again.
I don't know.
Again, I don't know who that's for.
Again, it could be someone on the replay or that we'll watch this later, but God
sees you and he wants you to sing again.
But part of that process will be healing from the things that were said to you.
When you were trying to sing and just be yourself and, and you were just trying to
be full of joy or maybe for you, it's dancing.
I don't know, like whatever that thing is for you.
That got squashed by someone else, whether it was a parent, a former spouse,
maybe it was a teacher, some people that are, you know, really jokesters and
silly are that way, but also some people become that way because that is their
coping mechanism regarding the pain that they've been through.
So they shift into like comedy and things.
Some people are just naturally funny.
Um, and I do think that that is a part of the way God puts that stuff in
people, because I think God is fun.
I do.
I think he has a fun personality and he wants to show that to people in the world.
But if that stuff was squashed, even down in you, again, these are just
ideas, maybe for you, it's something else, but I really want you to pray into how
can you start to show up more and be yourself to allow those things that were
pushed down by other people to come out to play again, coming out of hiding is
this is the actual definition of it.
Being authentic, present, engaged in life, intentionally choosing to be fully
present in the moment, recognizing your true self and actively participating in
life with purpose and intention, not holding anything back.
How many of you shrank back because you're afraid that someone's
not going to like your opinion?
I know that that happens on a re on the regular with people.
When we show up as our authentic selves, we often give other people
permission to do the same.
We're all on a journey every single day to grow into the understanding of who God
originally created us to be before those trauma and wounds.
And so again, remember it's grace after grace, after grace, you're growing as
after grace, after grace, you're growing as you're going.
Is there any part of yourself where you do tend to hold back?
As I was talking about with people, even when they're safe people, this isn't
just toxic people that we hold back.
Some of us hold back parts of ourselves, even around safe people.
Um, and what else is coming up in my spirit is I have this friend.
She actually originally was in the program and over the years, um, have
spent a lot of time with her and, uh, coached her quite a bit.
And one of the things that she said to me when we were coaching is that, um, she
used to love to read books, but got teased for it as a kid.
And, and part of the reason she started reading the books was a coping mechanism
herself.
She didn't know it as a kid, but she like isolated and withdrew and would
start reading, reading, reading, and the other kids would like make fun of her.
And so she kind of coined herself as weird.
She believed the lie from the enemy that she was weird.
And so we were coaching this one time and she's like, I know this is really weird.
And she was like talking about something about reading books.
And I was like, let's, let's, let's go back there for a minute.
Why is that weird?
I don't think it's weird.
And it like stopped her in her tracks because where did that come from?
So that's how we got to the unpacking it that even when she was younger, when she
first experienced some pretty major trauma, that was one of the coping
mechanisms that she started utilizing and then got made fun of for that part.
Like she didn't interact with other kids a lot.
And again, like she kind of was an outsider.
She struggled to kind of fully show up in the world.
And so for some of you, those are the kinds of things that I believe the Lord
wants to reveal that, you know, these, these mechanisms started to happen at a
young age and maybe other people didn't fully understand us, or maybe we struggled
to connect with people.
And so we, the enemy labeled us and we partnered with him.
We believed the lie.
And we started calling ourselves stupid, weird.
I'm just shy.
You guys don't know how many times I hear people say that.
Do I believe that some people have aspects of themselves that maybe they are more
reserved?
Sure.
But I've coached long enough to know now that shy is also a coping mechanism.
It's a learned behavior.
And so what would happen if we just started not questioning everything, but like
questioning.
thing like, okay, when did I start becoming shy? When did I
didn't mean to be? Or did you create me to be something
different or something more? And excuse me, and I'm just not
living into that. Because of pain or trauma or things people
said to me, doubts I've had about myself. Again, this is
about us stepping into the real us. But first, we have to
discover where are we not fully living? Where are we not really
alive? And in our world today, here's the reality as well. We
live in this online world, right? We can show up in these
live sessions and be alive, and fun and smile and be happy. But
then when we have to encounter people in the real world, we're
like, Oh, I don't know about you guys. But the more that I'm
only online working from home, I go out and all of a sudden
something that used to feel normal and common, all of a
sudden feels a little like, Oh, this is kind of I haven't been
out to a store in a long time. I just buy everything from Amazon
y'all just have it shipped to my house. I don't even I just order
my groceries. My husband goes and picks them up and we bring
them home. Like, you know, and I'm not saying those are bad
things. I'm so grateful that I can order my groceries and we
can pick them up because it saves me time. But see how we're
kind of leaning into that and then we start to struggle. So
even as young kids think about it, if we pulled back in any way
and then we try to reengage so many times, most likely we had
some level of awkwardness or I don't know about this. And if
anyone said anything to us, that was remotely negative, it
reinforced our fear internally that we were having. I know, I
know this to be true, because I've lived it. And I feel like
God just has me kind of honing in on this tonight. So if any of
you had boyfriends, this is kind of coming up in my spirit to
boyfriends in high school. Something happened that you got
embarrassed in front of other people. I don't I don't know
what the dynamic is. I remember I don't know if I've ever told
this story. But it's coming up in my spirit. So I'm just going
to share it quickly. I was at I was with a bunch of friends in
high school. And back back in the day, you know, I think I
don't know if kids still play this or not. I don't even know
they just play online games, I think. But um, you know, we were
playing truth or dare. And I didn't really want to play but
everybody else was playing. And so I'm in this group of people
and somebody dared me to do something and I had to stand up
to do it. And this girl that was supposed to be my best
friend pulled my shorts down in front of everyone. Y'all I was
mortified. There were boys in this circle of people. That was
definitely not something that I thought was funny. They were all
laughing. They thought it was hilarious. And I got so mad. I
ended up storming out of the house. It was pouring down rain
literally I was walking down the street crying in the pouring
rain and my friends are driving the car trying to get me back
in. I'm like, No, like I'm not going back there. Like I was so
mad. And I'm sharing this story because it's the same friend I
tell another story about in one of our other sessions that
shoved me into a bathroom at one point, put a ball down my shirt
and then told another boy to go after the ball. So this was a
friend that for some reason, the enemy really used her to
like, put me in these really awkward situations. And it had
sexual nature connected to it, right. And because of the abuse
and the things I had gone through, like when she pulled my
pants down in front of everyone, like it just like went into all
the trauma. And so that's why like I just had to like I now
hindsight, I had a panic attack, I could not, like I
could not even deal with what was happening in that place. And
so I'm, again, I literally don't think in five years I've ever
told that story. So it is clearly for someone I want you
to know that God has helped me process those things. And know
that I was not weird. I wasn't the one that was doing something
that was weird that night. And I won't even label her as weird. I
don't know why she did it. Probably to get a rise out of
everybody. I don't know. Maybe it was to embarrass me. I don't
know if my she was supposed to be my best friend. I don't know
if she just wanted to bring me down a level. I really don't
know the intention of her heart, but it's okay. I don't have to.
I really don't have to know. All I know is that in that moment, I
I remember feeling weird because I was walking in the rain and I just could not like, I couldn't
let any of my friends kind of get close to me in that moment because it didn't feel safe.
And so back then, I didn't know how to even deal with that because then I have to go back
around all those people and try to act normal, right?
But I didn't feel normal.
I felt weird.
I felt strange.
And I felt embarrassed at the core, right?
And not loved.
And so we have to work through these things and I could have very easily went into hiding.
I will tell you that I was not as close to that friend after that because that again,
that was the second incident with her.
And there were a lot of other things that were going on in that relationship and friendship
is not healthy.
And so I learned how to make other healthier friends.
And I pulled back from that friendship.
There's a song and I'll post this one again.
I don't know if you guys got to hear the one from last week that I put up in the group,
but it is there if you didn't get a chance to hear it.
Zach Williams, Fear is a Liar.
But the one for this week is Out of Hiding by Stephanie Gretzinger.
And it's literally all about coming out of hiding.
I'm going to put the link up.
You guys can listen to it.
What it meant like meditate as you're hearing God speak to you again, what ways do you need
to come out of hiding?
What areas and stories do you have like mine that even like that, like I don't think about
that story very often, but here it is tonight, right?
But I can also bless those people and know that that's all a part of my story and that
I have learned to overcome even those difficult moments.
So what you align with matters, ladies, okay?
That's kind of the point I'm getting at.
That night, I didn't know how to not align with that I'm weird.
This is like, you know, all these negative things that I was hearing.
But as I started healing over these, you know, however many years since then, I've learned
that again, that was a coping mechanism.
I actually like had a normal response to something that was traumatic to me because it also linked
to my other trauma.
And so I stopped judging myself.
And I think that's really important for so many of you is like, how much grace are you
extending to yourself?
Are you being really hard on yourself all the time?
Or are you saying, hey, like, man, and like going back to the younger version, like that's
what I had to do go back to that younger version of myself and just love myself when other
people weren't loving me.
And really honor myself in that moment.
And love myself out of hiding and into wholeness into the light.
So what are what are your thoughts right now currently aligning with?
Do you tell yourself that you're stupid?
I don't know if you guys have ever done this.
So y'all can raise your hand.
Let's we'll get everybody.
Let's see how many people do this.
Okay, I have improved so much on this you all.
But how many of you in this zoom room have ever run into a wall and told the wall you're
sorry, anyone, anyone?
I got a couple people that are saying, yep, I've done it.
I used to do it all the time.
I have no clue why I was telling a wall that I was sorry.
But I was running into, you know, things and like, not even realizing I was saying I was
sorry to all.
Well, this seems like such a silly thing.
But here's the reality.
It wasn't just the wall.
I was apologizing for things that I didn't even do.
Apologizing for other people taking their responsibilities on myself.
And I just did it so much that it also came out when I would run into the wall.
Basically, I was sorry for existing.
That's the reality, some of us, that's where we're at.
But we have to be willing to really look at like, I'm just asking you all to take a really
good look at your heart.
And you want to allow the Lord again, we're not digging, but we are really asking the
Lord to reveal every area for healing and it's perfect timing.
Kind of like no holds barred, like go all in and just be open to letting God open the
Pandora's box and don't be afraid, if you will.
Because it's going to set you free.
And these stories, these things that I'm telling you tonight, these are these are all
different little things, but you know what?
They all added up to big things.
And so when we allow God to heal even the little things, the things that we might even
think, well, that's.
That's kind of silly. That's just something I say. My family has always done that or said that.
Well, is that what God wants you to say and continue to claim over yourself and your family?
You know, like we partner with, you know, I've just always been in debt.
But God has more for you.
So come out of hiding. What are, you know, again, what are your thoughts currently aligning with?
Are they aligning with heaven and the sound of heaven, the thoughts of heaven?
And you might say, well, I don't even know for sure what heaven is saying.
Well, the word of God is a great place to start because it is the heart of the Father expressed through the living word.
And it is definitely the voice of heaven.
So here's the reality, ladies. I don't know if you knew this or not, but you are a supernova.
Yes, you.
So Catherine, you are a supernova. Tatiana, Amy, Melissa, Diana, almost said Diana.
So sorry. All of you all, all of you beautiful ladies are supernovas.
And so what that means is you are, you're literally carrying something inside of yourself to change the world.
And some of us, you know, we get overwhelmed with that thought.
And so I want to remind you, changing the world can be one person at a time.
And that one, that first person can be you.
And the more that you heal and grow, what will happen is organically, you're going to impact the people around you.
Matthew 5 verses 14 through 16 in the message translation says this.
Here's another way to put it. You're here to be light, bringing out the God colors in the world.
God is not a secret to be kept. We're going public with this.
As public as a city on a hill.
If I make you light bearers, you don't think I'm going to hide you under a bucket, do you?
I'm putting you on a light stand.
Now that I've put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand, shine, keep open house, be generous with your lives.
By opening up to others, you'll prompt people to open up with God, this generous father in heaven.
Did you catch that?
By opening up to others, you'll prompt people to open up with God.
Keep open house, ladies.
Romans 8, 37 through 39 says this.
Know in all these things, we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, nor the present nor the future, nor any powers, not height nor depth, nor principalities nor powers, not anything in the present, remember?
Nothing in all of creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus, our Lord.
But so often we believe the lie that he has left us.
He's forsaken us.
He's not going to fulfill his promise.
He's a liar.
He dangles carrots.
He's a trickster.
Y'all, tricksters don't love.
God himself is love.
He cannot deny who he is.
His love does not stop for you.
It is unconditional, ever flowing.
It's us learning how to receive his love, to receive his healing, and step into that place where we see things differently because we see them through the lens of love versus rejection and abandonment and whatever other negative thing there is.
So if God is for you, who can be against you?
If God is for your love story, who can be against it, ladies?
But see, again, we partner with all the doubt, the unbelief.
And again, I understand why we do, but at some point we have to get to the place where we choose to stop partnering with that stuff.
It's time.
It's time for you to step into the fullness of everything God has for you.
So it is your time, ladies.
So I want you to just write on your papers if you are able, if you're somewhere where you have paper, or on your phone, if you're driving, obviously don't do this, but just listen and go back and do it later.
I want you to write, it's your time.
And I want you to write your full name.
It's your time, Ariane.
It's your time, Amy Groves.
It's your time, Amanda Morrison.
That's how I want y'all to do it for yourself.
And I really would love for y'all to, even this week, I just feel like this is going to help some of y'all, write it out and put it up.
Remind yourself, it's your time, Melissa.
But put your last name, too, so you're kind of declaring it, the fullness of who you are.
It's time for the princesses on the inside of you to awaken.
And so I'm going to give you your first activation for this week as well.
We're going to do two.
out when we do this session. And I feel led to do it again. So I
want to encourage you all to get some princess gear. So I want
you to really pray and ask God what you're supposed to get. It
might be a tiara, it might be, you know, a veil that makes you
feel like a princess, it might be really sparkly shoes, like
you get to decide. I do feel like there's something about
getting a tiara and putting it on and seeing yourself with it
on. Some of our ladies that are here right now have done this
already. And so even if you are one of those ladies, put in the
chat, like tell the ladies, how did that go for you? How did
that help you? What were some things you felt, you know, and I
know sometimes we can hear these things and just feel kind of
silly, but you all, there's something about like, the
reality of okay, going from I'm a daughter to I'm a princess.
And in our culture today, a lot of people are all like, queen
this, queen that. And I'm not, I'm not mocking that. But so
many people are trying to be queens, and they've not even
learned to be a princess or a daughter. Y'all, we can't be a
queen and stand in authority and command things, you know, like
the Bible declares, if we don't even connect as a daughter. Do
you see how that just doesn't work? It'd be like back in the
day, you know, they have this signet ring to seal something.
It would be like trying to sign a letter with no signet ring.
And God wants you to start with the basics, daughter, princess,
start to feel what like, okay, look at myself as a princess,
start to understand that God declares that you as a spirit
maid as a wife, when a man finds a wife, he found has found
a good thing. Like you crown his life with goodness. But if you
don't believe that, you know, for yourself about yourself,
well, then you're probably going to pick a guy that doesn't treat
you that way. Do you see how that works? All right, Ephesians
514 says this, awake, awake, O sleeper, and rise from the dead
and Christ will shine on you awaken to true love's kiss, the
kiss from heaven awakening you to deeper understanding deeper
revelation of who God is his true plan for you awakening to
your true God given identity that awakening to restoration
that rebuilding of God, what he's doing in your life,
awakening to big bold future like the dreams awakening within
you. But also the dreams that y'all have had a kind of touch
on this earlier, childhood dreams coming back to life, new
dreams being birthed. Some of y'all have contemplated and, and
thought about starting something new. Something you've always
dreamed on, but something always convinces you you're not good
enough. And God may lead you to start to step into that in the
future. We all have to choose what to believe. So the question
is, again, you know, what are you going to choose to believe
like, whose report? Do you believe? Do you believe the
report of the Lord and his love for you? Or do you believe the
report of the enemy declaring things over you? So in our
world, we also have a lot of like things where they get us
off track and three things that I found for women. And this
happens with men to you all. It's not just women, but I coach
women, most of the time. In here, the three things are
comparison, competition, or imitation. And sometimes the
enemy will use one of these, sometimes he'll use all of them
sometimes different seasons, I'll sense him attacking, you
know, a different way than he did in the prior season. And so
tonight, the question for you when you go into breakout
session here in a moment is, which one of these is the enemy
using in your life right now to challenge the real you from
showing up? Comparison, competition, or imitation? It
can be all three. So whatever your answer is, it's totally
fine. But typically, I find that most women have one of these
things showing up. We live in a social media driven worlds.
There's a lot of people that daily are on line comparing
themselves to someone's highlight reel. You have no clue
what's going on behind the scenes there. Okay, remember
that. Remember that. All right, here we go. I'm going to get
breakout sessions ready.
We're just going to do a quick one tonight, ladies, okay?
So like five minutes.
So short, brief, and powerful.
Let's see here.
Who do I got in the rooms?
I'm going to take it down.
Hey, Bethany, someone's wanting you to repeat the assignment again.
Oh, sure.
Yeah, Alina.
Awesome.
So basically, comparison, competition, or imitation.
Out of those three things, what is the enemy using to like war against the real you in
this season?
Like, is he using competition, getting you to compare yourself with other people, trying
to convince you that, you know, you can't be good or whatever that is, but that comparison,
competition, or imitation?
All right, ladies.
I'm going to go ahead and click this so that you can join.
Go ahead.
Five minutes.
So try to click and join those as quick as you can.
Keep those short, brief, and powerful.
Father, thank you so much.
As the ladies are joining these rooms, we thank you for the conversations that we're
already having tonight.
We thank you for leading us into fullness and truth and hope.
Father, we just ask you to help us to hear what your spirit is saying.
God, that we would trust you more and more and more in the days ahead.
We thank you, God, for removing every false thought, every word spoken over us that was
limiting, you know, by other people, as well as us partnering with limiting belief systems
and thoughts about ourselves.
God, we thank you that you're healing us from the inside out.
We thank you, God, that you are redeeming the time and you're restoring every broken
and fallen place in our lives.
We thank you that, you know, you are leading us into wide open spaces and that you're continuing
to help us to know more every day what your spirit is saying about us.
We thank you, God, for, yeah, Lord, changing the lens that we see ourselves through.
We know that, God, you've seen every aspect of our journeys.
I thank you, God, that you'll help us to just continue to surrender the pen to you,
to trust, God, that you're doing a good work in our lives and that you're not gonna quit.
You're gonna keep working on us and building us up to step into the plan and the purpose
that you have for us, Lord.
Help us to not give up.
Help us to not quit before we get to the finish lines, if you will.
God, I thank you that you would just continue to renew the connection with you, first and foremost,
that you would even like in Revelation, ladies, it talks about, you know, returning to our first love.
And we do believe that God has a love story for you, but we believe the love story is the cherry on top.
We genuinely believe that your relationship with the Lord is the most important thing.
And the more that you heal and grow in your relationship with the Lord, we truly believe that God will.
And you partner with him in the process of the things he's leading you to do.
That's kind of key.
The more that you will step into the fullness of God's plan for you, including that love story,
that is possible for you.
So no matter what you experienced in the past, God can rewrite your story.
Genesis 50-20, this is kind of what I was referring to earlier.
You intended harm to harm me.
And in this scripture, it's not talking like God was trying to harm him.
Joseph was talking to, like, his brothers.
This was in the moment where Joseph's brothers had come back, you know, and this is when he, like, was talking to them and revealed who he was.
You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good.
He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.
I just want to encourage you again, just that God didn't intend the pain to happen in your life.
But God can use the pain for purpose as we give it to him and as we surrender the pen completely.
That came up twice, so I feel like that's a word for somebody tonight that you're really still struggling with that surrendering the pen because you're trying to do it in your own strength.
Just remember that that's why this super, God's super meets our natural.
It's leaning into the supernatural presence of God, the power of the Holy Spirit that can guide us and help us every step of the way.
And here's the other thing.
Some of us are so afraid to move forward because we're trying to do something perfect, and the story can unfold as we go.
So even as I was saying we're growing as we're going, you know, I can remember back in the day, I used to be so afraid of getting out of the boat because I was so afraid to make the wrong move.
And I can remember talking to a friend of mine and she said Bethany
don't you think God's big enough to like
Pick you back up out of the water and put you back in the boat if it is the wrong choice
And I was just like oh my gosh, you're so right, but you know, I'm not trying to oversimplify it
But so often, you know, we don't move we don't make a move because we're afraid to make the wrong move
And a lot of times when because you know, like for me
I had made some wrong decisions and so that that fed more into that
But the more I've made healthy decisions the more confidence I've like God has restored
Like in me for myself towards myself. And so I believe the same can happen for you all as well. Isaiah 61 says this
The spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor
He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed
He has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord's favor has come and with it the day of God's
Anger against their enemies. Sorry ladies. That's popping a reminder for me
To all who mourn in Israel
He will give a crown of beauty for ashes a joyous blessing instead of mourning festive praise instead of despair in their righteousness
They will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his glory
They will rebuild the ancient ruins repairing cities destroyed long ago, they will revive them though they have been deserted for many
generations
James 1 2 through 4 says this my fellow believers when it seems as though you are facing nothing but difficulties
See it as an invaluable opportunity opportunity greatest joy that you can
for you know that when your faith is tested it stirs a power within you to endure all things and then as your endurance grows
Even stronger it will release
perfection into every part of your being until there is nothing missing and nothing lacking in
Jesus name y'all nothing missing nothing lacking completely whole
Lacking no good thing is something I pray over myself and my family
Daily, I pray that when I pray the armor of God unto us and I really believe it does make a difference
So I want to encourage you all to really consider that
For yourselves as well. Alright, so welcome back. I'm gonna really quick you quickly
Tell you our second
Activation for this week for those of you that have already done this as always you don't have to redo it
If you want to repost it and show the ladies that are here now
Your silhouette you can do that, but it is called the silhouette activation and I will put the instructions up in the group tonight
It'll explain it more in depth, but basically and I'll show you some examples
But again as I show you the examples you have to promise that you're not going to compare yourself to other people
You're just gonna allow God to show you what to do for yourself and just know that everybody does different stuff and it's all good
It's all okay, but here's what I try to encourage everyone to do and you don't have to be artists to do this ladies
Okay, I've had ladies create an image using a computer and then write the words on it. Okay, so be very open-minded
About how this will go for you. I
Want you to pray and draw a silhouette of yourself
You can even use a photo of yourself that you love if that's what you want to do
For those of you that love to draw get creative and I'll show you some examples
And everybody hey, just so y'all know every version of this is creative
Even if you're not someone that is an artist and loves to draw even those that are just putting their heart out there
That's all creativeness. Alright, so what you're gonna do though with this
The key is to take quick action
Okay, so don't let's not partner with having to have it perfect or worrying about what people will think
Remember, we're gonna come out of comparison
All right, so you're gonna pray and ask the Lord to reveal his heart to you
What is the truth? He wants you to hear about yourself
So this is the thing God
Who do you say that I am
and
What I want you to do. I want you to have a paper ready
Okay, so this is something that really want you to kind of be already like in an intentional space God
Who do you say that I am and I want you to write down everything that comes up in your spirit
If anything is negative, it doesn't go on that paper. I want you to write it on a separate paper and
Then you're gonna cross that out because we know that God doesn't say anything negative about you
You're gonna cross that out and you're gonna ask God to show you what the truth is to replace the lie
Because that's the enemy still getting in there and speaking to you about who you are. Okay, he's informing your thoughts
You're gonna write down those images and words once you have them only the positive ones will go on to
to your silhouette picture.
And again, I'll show you some examples
so you guys, this'll come together here.
The ones that are negative,
some of y'all might have to work through that a little bit
because even as you write the negative
and try to replace it with the truth,
you might not hear something positive for a little bit.
But just keep doing it and see where that leads you, okay?
Because that might even be a revealing
for healing in and of itself.
But go through that process until you get something positive
and then you can write the positive.
But if, you know, some of those might lead you guys
into, you know, a week of processing, who knows?
So it's okay if those don't go on there at this time
and you circle back in a few weeks and add it.
So don't feel like you have to wait to post it
if you're processing some of those.
So again, only positive words are gonna go on your silhouette
and then I want you to,
I wanna encourage you all to post them in the group.
This is where, again, like some weeks
our group is just gonna light up
and it's gonna be really full of life
and it's gonna feel so good to see each other's silhouettes.
Okay, on that note, I'm gonna show you
some of your sisters who've gone before you
who have done this.
I'm gonna try to talk quickly about some of these.
This is a young lady that went through our program.
She did not like to look at herself at all,
not in the mirror, not on the screen.
And when she did this activation,
the flowers represent God changing her view of herself,
you all.
So this is where it's important
just to trust the Lord in your process.
She just, that was something that came up in her spirit
as she was doing the silhouette activation.
And so she did it.
And as she was drawing the flowers,
she actually said,
I felt like God was healing me on the inside.
And so these are the words that she heard.
You guys can kind of see some of those there.
But again, you're hearing God for yourself.
And so what is God saying to you as you do this?
Here's another one.
So cool.
Love all of these.
These are so amazing.
So she wrote on there,
who does God say I am?
So that that would remind her.
And she has this life coming,
this growth and thing flourishing out of her mind.
Hers had to do a lot with her mind being healed and restored.
So that's just how she felt led to share that and express it.
And as you notice here,
some are up on her mind area and some are on her body.
So again, trust the Lord in all of that.
Here's one where she's wearing a crown, princess.
She's got really beautiful lips.
She's got all these amazing words all over herself.
One of hers here,
and this like stood out to me
and standing out again tonight,
but well taken care of.
That was something that she heard and she wrote down.
And she put that on one cheek
and the apple of his eye on the other cheek.
So again, trust where you're writing them
because even in that you all,
if you start to look into this stuff,
don't overthink it as you're doing it.
Allow yourself to just get it on the paper
and then look into some of that stuff.
And we can help you a little bit with that,
but it's really a fun journey as you let the Lord lead you
to understand what these things mean.
Here's another one.
Again, absolutely beautiful.
She did the pencil and then did the words over top,
titled it, The Real Me.
Here's one.
She didn't put any eyes or face in that.
You all, again, this is totally fine.
This is beautiful and perfect.
She put words in different colors
and she felt led to highlight certain ones.
Those were two that she just really felt
like she didn't believe yet.
And so God was like telling her to pray into those more.
So that's why she highlighted those.
Here's another one.
I'm gonna start to go through these a little quicker.
Here's another one for you.
Again, however you all do this, this is your thing.
Now this one, I leave this for the end
because she's actually an artist.
I don't want people to get intimidated,
but I do think it's pretty incredible
like just seeing her creative expression
as an artist in this.
And this was a really healing process for her as well.
So I love all of them.
I think they're all amazing.
I love seeing them and praying over you all.
And when I am in the group coaching and my team,
I've been teaching my team to do the same thing
is that we will look at them and really pray over them.
And if there's certain words that stand out,
we're probably gonna coach you
on those a little bit as well.
So you can expect that, but don't hold back, okay?
If I can encourage you in anything, don't hold back.
Here's the reality.
God is gonna tell you who you are.
You may not believe all of them.
I really wanna encourage you to write the things
that you don't even believe yet, okay?
Again, this is a part of you healing.
Part of healing is acknowledging where you are right now.
Even if you don't feel those things,
God is saying, this is who I say that you are.
In addition, you guys have heard this song,
obviously, probably a lot.
But in addition.
to that coming out of hiding song that I mentioned, you know, that Lauren Daigle song comes to mind as
well. I think it is Who You Say I Am or something like that. But it's, you know, she has a couple
like Child of God, she has a couple that are like very identity, like driven, if you all want to
consider listening to those, you might not like those artists. But maybe if you don't like them,
you'll find another artist that you love that have songs in those themes. Okay. So those are
the activations. Remember the princess and princess gear. And hey, you all, the goal isn't
to just buy the princess gear. It's to take a photo of yourself representing the princess gear
and putting them in the group. And again, you know, these are the these are the moments like
you're going to cherish this stuff. When you look back, if you actually step in and do it,
you're going to be like, man, I did that. And your sisters are going to cheer you on. It's a great
experience. If you choose to step into that. Alright, so let's go ahead to go to Catherine
first. Hi, Catherine. Hey, hello. Well, mine, I was saying is comparison a lot. And lately,
I'm really, really, really struggling. This has been a trial I've been going through over a month.
And I think I really had a moment yesterday of I just broke down and sobbed like no tomorrow.
I had a prayer time in one of the churches I was going to before my dad got our family church.
And they have prayer time once a month, first Sunday at night, it doesn't interfere with
anything my dad and I are doing at our church. So I go and I lost it. I am absolutely 100%
convinced that not having a reliable car that I can't even drive 13 miles away from my home
without saying my engine is overheating. And the fact that I am dirt poor, I'm dealing with so much
debt. It's going to keep me away from my spirit mate. It's bad enough that this is like a real
thing that I have to deal with. And I don't like having to worry about what if the engine overheats
just going the very little distance to work? Or what do I do when they asked me to go to the
Sydney site? That's about 40 some odd minutes away. And I also couldn't even go and see fireworks 13
miles away on the fourth without a problem. But it's literally I'm like afraid it's literally
going to keep me away from my spirit mate. Because I feel like I am never worth it for a guy to go out
of his way for me. I feel like I have to do everything. And it's not only with that. But I
mean, I've even misunderstood a friend up here upstate because I'm so used to having the friends
where I had to do everything and God forbid I need something or I can't do something. It's always a
thing. But it seems like the help is never there for me when I need it. But I'm always giving that
help and wouldn't think twice when it's someone else going through it. And that's a huge thing I'm
going through a lot lately. Thank you for sharing that. So the first thing I'm writing this down.
The first thing I'm going to ask you to do, Catherine, and I know this sounds so simple,
and this is for everyone else, you guys might have some things that sound similar in your dialogue
at times, but on that help is never there for me when I need it. That would be something I
would encourage you to write down as a negative thing that you're hearing, right? As we're talking
about this silhouette, crossing that out. And what literally what's the opposite of that?
Help is there for me when I need it. Yeah, you know, and again, it doesn't mean that we don't
feel things in real life, right? We're going to go through things where yes, there are hardships.
You know, I had a car repaid back in the day when I was married. That was not because of me.
That was because of decisions my ex-husband was making. And I was going through a lot of stuff
because of the bad decisions he was making. Was that really, really hard? 100%. But I had to learn
how to not partner with like God wasn't doing that to me. And not that you're saying that, but like
deep down. Again, we will partner with stuff like this, not just because we don't think people will
show up, but we don't think God's going to show up. And if we think that a car not running can
keep us from our spirit mate, well, literally, if we even just went out on a walk, here's the
reality. I'm not saying it's, it's not, I'm not saying it's just going to happen like this. But
here is the honest reality. You could just go for a walk to a park one day and meet someone that
could be your spirit mate. I mean, but we don't we we kind of don't think like that most of the
time. We think it's going to always be hard or that, you know,
Oh, it always has to be how other people have met people.
Now, a lot of people are meeting their spirit mates online.
A lot of people are driving to dates, but again, it, you said it yourself.
I don't believe I'm worth a guy driving to me or that he would even want to.
So Catherine, you already know where you need to do the heart work, girl.
You need to get in there and get to that core of again, like who am I?
You might even need to revisit this.
Like, even though you've done the silhouette and just sit back with your
silhouette, is there anything new coming to you, but really take some more time
to meditate on the good things that God has already said about you and really
keep getting those down in the core of your being again, ladies, the more that
we believe that God loves us, the more that we understand the character of God
and his attributes, and that we believe those are available to us, the less we
will believe the lies when they come, even when something bad is happening.
I've been prepping for our kids lesson this Sunday.
I'm so excited.
And this is, it's coming up in my spirit because, um, I'm going to talk to the
kids about, um, loving, even when it's hard and the craft that we're going to
make, and this is why I want to talk about this, it's going to, the bottom
half is going to be like a plate, but we're going to color it black, but then
we're going to put a sunshine at the top of it and a cross and birds, and it's
going to represent that hope can still happen even in the darkness and that,
you know, as Jesus is coming back, we always, no matter what we go through,
ladies, we always have hope.
We always have hope, but it's whether or not we partner with, I have no hope.
I have no hope.
Nothing's changing.
Nothing.
Like the more that we partner with that, the more that's going to be the outcome.
So that's why we have to look at what are, where are our current thoughts leading us?
What is our current dialogue?
If I'm believing that I'm never going to find someone who will even drive
anywhere to come and meet me, let alone pay for my date, well, then we're going
to attract a bunch of takers, aren't we typically, yeah, that's what's going to
happen.
So again, you already, you're recognizing it.
So I want you to see the growth in yourself.
Okay.
You're recognizing the lies.
You're recognizing the areas that you need healing.
And so it's just continuing to put the heartwork principles and
tools that you've learned.
Keep putting those to practice.
Keep allowing God to heal you.
Um, you know, afraid that a car is going to keep you from your spirit mate is just
really, you know, believing that nothing's ever going to change for you too.
And so the other part of that too, is I just found out today.
I mean, I knew I owed more than it was worth, but I didn't know it was this bad.
I owe like 5,000, about $5,235 more than it's worth.
And believe me, I thought of voluntarily letting it get repoed.
I don't know what else to do.
I really thought of doing it because I need something that works.
I don't want to pay another dime on something that doesn't work.
I thought of voluntarily surrendering it.
When we, when we chatted about this, uh, the car, like a month or two ago, um,
when I mentioned about working with a financial person that can kind of help
you, um, like really like what I would consider doing is talking to like a
financial coach, okay.
Where they're really helping you get into the nitty gritty of your finances.
What do you have in savings?
What do you make?
All that kind of stuff, because I feel like you need an outside reinforcement
to help you work through this more in depth, where they can really see the
full picture organically of your situation.
And there are church organizations that have that.
You might even want to look into, I don't know that Dave Ramsey has it, but
they might be able to refer you to someone that does do it.
Um, and you know, that might even be able to do that online.
There are people that help people for free.
So not everybody, you know, charges for that kind of stuff.
Um, so Catherine, I would really encourage you to look into doing that
because the only way ladies that we're going to be able to change, like our
circumstances is for us to change something that we're doing.
So for example, back in the day, I don't know if you guys ever have been in this
place, but I used to say that I couldn't put money in my 401k this is many, many
years ago because I just didn't even see how we were going to be able to
not have that money for a bill.
Like I didn't even feel like I could put $25 in there.
And literally my boss and his wife talked to me about it.
multiple times, and I just kept saying I couldn't do it.
Well, you know what's really interesting
is many years later, I was in a worse financial position
and I finally just chose to do it.
And you wanna know what's really interesting
is I figured out how to live on what was left.
And I started saving money in my 401k and it kept growing.
We have to start somewhere, ladies.
So maybe, and Catherine, I'm not saying
this applies to you at all, but like for me,
some of the things I cut out going to get coffee
at Starbucks or whatever, I think there are things
that we can shift sometimes.
Again, not saying that applies to Catherine,
but in saying this for everybody right now.
So what are the areas where we can make
a different financial decision to save
a little bit more money or put more money towards the car?
But again, a financial coach could definitely work
with you more in depth, because I feel like
that is really what you need right now.
You need somebody that can really see the full picture
of your finances and can really sit with you
and help you make a very wise decision regarding this car.
Yeah, and that's definitely what I need big time.
I was saying that is definitely what I need 100% big time.
And when I tried to call someone that,
like my union covered the benefits,
I didn't find it helpful with them.
I don't think they're the right ones,
because their kind of attitude was,
there's nothing I could do about the auto loan.
Even if you sat there and took out a personal loan
and there's nothing we can do with it.
We can help with the credit cards,
but we can't help with that.
Because yes, there's been a lot of the repairs
thrown on a credit card.
But I need something, but yeah,
I need somebody that can cover all of that.
So I need help finding the right one.
I'll look at some options for you, Catherine, tomorrow.
Thank you.
And I will send you an email through our admin team,
because this is something we've directed people
to some resources before.
But yeah, definitely look into that when I send the email
and hopefully you'll be able to step towards that
a little bit more.
But really work on the core things in your heart as well.
Okay?
Thank you, but that's definitely what I need.
And then those are gonna be the right resources
because I need help finding the right one.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
When I was working on my finances,
one time I started turning lights off when I left a room.
Yep.
My electric bill was 20 less a month.
That is 100%, Roseanne.
Yes.
Sometimes it is small shifts.
There's things that we can do,
but we have to get resourceful.
And sometimes it is talking to people
and finding out what's helped them as well.
Lisa, would love to hear what you have to say.
Thank you.
Yeah, I just have to tell you, I'm pretty nervous.
But that's actually a good thing.
So during the breakout session,
I first thought it was comparison,
and then I realized it was competition.
And how that came up was actually
just kind of remembering some childhood stuff
with this best friend, my childhood best friend
who I've talked about before on calls,
excuse me, where I recently reconnected with her
at our high school reunion a few years ago.
And I think it's really interesting
because I do remember in that one conversation with you
where you're like, this is coming up for a reason, Lisa.
And I don't remember what you thought the reason was,
but I'm hoping that God reveals some more.
So basically, first the comparison was,
like if I'm online, I'll compare myself
to how other women look and all that thing.
So it's about beauty.
And then the other thing that happens
is there's a podcast that I'm wanting to start,
but it's just not the timing right now
because I'm needing to get financially secure
and take care of some other things first.
And so if I see somebody kind of doing
what I'm looking to do,
I'll feel like someone beat me to the punch type of thing.
And I feel there's a competition there.
We're like, oh, that was my idea.
But the thing is there's room for everybody in the world.
Do you know what I mean?
I know that here, I know that.
But what's interesting is that that conversation
then led to in the breakout session of,
so when I was younger, like seven, eight, nine,
maybe up to even 12,
my mom worked for a clothing department store
and my mom was very connected with the local photographer
for one of the newspapers.
We had two newspapers in our town.
And so consequently, I got asked to model a lot
for the store and I would be in the newspaper.
Well, my best friend one time
got asked to model for the newspaper
and you would have thought I like died.
I was like, what?
That was my job.
She can't have that.
Like it was my whole identity
was wrapped up in this wreckage.
ignition, you know, and, and also I wasn't saved. We I didn't
grow up with my family being saved. Um, yeah, so I mean,
anyway, so, um, and then I remember one time, journaling
some thoughts out this was years ago about the same friend. And I
remember saying, I was so vivid in my mind where I said, I feel
like I'm a balloon floating on the water, like, that's me, like
just my spirit. But I always felt like she was trying to
push me down underwater, like submerge me like I could never
shine. Like I was like, she just couldn't be okay with that.
And, you know, she's a ballet dancer, she's been teaching for
decades, and her identity is definitely not that not that
just because you're a dancer, it means your identity has to be
wrapped up in your body. By default, it's very common, you
know, because there's so much emphasis placed on everything
about you, your looks, your tone, everything. And so I
noticed, like, every time I'm around her, ever since we
reconnected, I constantly feel like I'm being checked out,
like, you know, like, sized up, or you know what I mean? Like
judged, right? And then she always I don't think there's
been one conversation where she hasn't brought up her body or
somebody else's body. And I just like, I can't handle it. You
know, I haven't said anything, because I realized it's a
trigger within me. And there's healing that I need to handle.
Um, you know what I'm saying? So it's just interesting, though,
because it just comes up a lot, comes up a lot.
Yeah, I will say to, you know, the reason she's saying things
a lot is because she probably is struggling with body image
herself. I think, you know, and it's unfortunate, but a lot of
us do that, you know, or we might even instead of saying
things about other people, we're commenting about something
that's wrong with us, you know, like, whether it's we're too
heavy, we're this or that, you know, comparing ourselves. And
so not that you don't know that, but just as a reminder, that's
probably why she's doing that. But as you're processing, you
know, when these things are coming up in you, I think this
balloon thing is very interesting. And it kind of
catches my attention, Lisa, as you're talking. I mean, how long
have you felt like that came to mind for you about her about the
two of you all? Is this a new thing?
Like a new? No, no, I wrote that years ago. I wrote that years
ago. And it's almost Yeah, it's like, if I shine, she can't
handle it. You know what I mean? And I'm not a competitor. I'm
not trying to like, I'm just not that type of person. I'm not
like, Oh, look at me. And then some, you know, I'm not that's
just not who I am. Right? I and I Yeah. And yeah, I, I
definitely I think I know some of the root of where her stuff
comes from, you know what I mean? So that's good for me to
understand. It doesn't make it easy, though, for me to be
around her. Like, I really want been paying attention lately and
been like, you know, is I mean, yes, just because we were
friends growing up doesn't mean we have to, you know, you know,
have that again. Yeah. And we are very different people. You
know, we are very different people like she's not saved. I
am. And you know, by just by that alone, we, you know, we
think very differently.
It's good for us to be around unbelievers, but we need to go
them with the mindset that we are ministering, like, not that
we're always trying to convert them, but like that we are
going in, like with a ministry mindset. So we're not expecting
them to be like us, or talk like us or act. And I don't mean that
like, they're not good enough or any of those kind of things. But
you know, sometimes we go in with a Christian mindset, with
someone that's non Christian, we expect them to be like us talk
like us think like us. And they don't, right. Number two thing
that comes to mind is you're talking a little bit more about
this. And I keep going back to the word always as well. It just
makes me think about even when we get in arguments with our
spouse, one of the key things they say is to fight fair. And
one of the ways you fight fair is to really be aware of when
you say they always do that, or they never do that. And really
start identifying, okay, if is it really true that they always
do that? Now, she probably does, you know, maybe mentioned
it, maybe mentioned it a lot. But I got some feedback.
All right, let's see if that's better. Let's see if that's
better. I'm gonna mute you just for a second, Lisa, I think I'm
for whatever reason that just started kicking in feedback from
you. So just unmute yourself when you're ready to talk again.
But, um, you know, it tells us to really be aware of when we
make those kind of statements. Because we're, we're basically
kind of putting someone into a like, they can never change kind
of thing. And we need
to look at those statements as well, because it's a signal that something needs to change.
So whether it's, you know, that we just don't jive well with that person, or is God trying to
show us something in ourselves that's getting pulled out when we're around those people.
So you're mentioning, you know, you started with, I tend to compare myself online when I see other
women that I think, you know, regarding their beauty. But then your friend came up, and I
almost wonder if it's a both and tonight. You know, where it is both, like, okay, this is something
I'm still struggling with myself. And when I'm around this person, it's getting activated more.
Do you see what I'm saying? So for example, a spirit of lust has tried to attack me my entire
life, literally. When I get around people that are carrying that spirit, I get attacked by that
spirit more. So for example, I went to a this group, we went to this Bible study with this
group of people like a week ago. And I realized that three times now that we've gone to that
place, the enemy has bombarded me with thoughts, lustful things that I don't even think about.
And the first couple times I kept thinking, what the heck is wrong with me? Like I started
owning them like they were my thoughts. They weren't the enemy was assaulting me.
But it was getting activated by the area that I was in the principalities in that place, but also
the spirit that some of these other people were walking in. Because they had their I'm just I'm
pretty confident one or two people probably are battling with some level of sex addiction or
something that that were attending this group. I'm saying that to you to say this, you're already
struggling with some of this stuff internally, your own body image, your own beauty. And so
you're getting around her and she's struggling with it. And so it's almost like it's like the
opposite of you know, when Elizabeth and Mary came together and the babies left within them,
and it was like a good thing. It's kind of the same concept. But it's like, when when we're having
these internal struggles and that spirit, and we're carrying that and they're carrying that
when gets around each other, it's just kind of like triggering each other triggering each other.
Does that make sense? I feel like that was probably an easier way to I wish I would have said that
first. But you know, so I would encourage you a make sure you have your armor on before you go
spend time with her if you're going to spend time with her. Be keep working on your your internal
things regarding your own body image, your own like worth and value regarding your beauty and
things. So that no matter where she's at, at some point, I believe that you can be around her and be
at peace. I do. Yeah. Yeah, thank you so much. Because I think too. Yeah, it's interesting because
I live alone. You know what I mean? And so, you know, when you're not I mean, I'm around people,
of course, but really, you know, like, I'm not working right now either. So yeah, I have a lot
of time on my hands where I'm solo. And I think just reconnecting with her and then being around
her more, it's just, you know, and I do agree with everything that you've said. And I also see
that because not that there has to be a reason, but I can tell that, like my just, just my being
in general, over the past two years, it's just been really challenging financially. And I can
tell that, like, my light isn't shining as much, you know what I mean? Like, I do. And, and it's
okay. Like, you know, I mean, of course, I don't want to stay there. But you know, I'm not going
to be hard on myself for the fact that it's just been what it's been. And I'm in a journey and I'm
learning and you know, God's it's going to work itself out. I do believe you know, I do. Yeah,
so I don't know what else I want to say about that. But yeah, but and I also wanted to say,
you know, just because somebody is not saved doesn't mean like, there are many great unsaved
people out there that are like, so loving, you know what I mean? So I kind of wanted to say that
just to, because I didn't want people thinking like, you know, I'm not, you know what I mean?
I'm not saying I'm just generally speaking. Yeah, I think just generally speaking, you know, like,
if somebody is not saved, they live a different, you know, lifestyle, in general, for the most
part, right? It's common, right? I don't think that came across wrong at all. And I wasn't saying
it in a negative way, either. It's just the reality of ministry and, you know, walking in the world
today is there's people that are Christian, there's people that are non Christian. And,
you know, yeah. So we look forward to hearing kind of how this goes as you, you know, really pray into
if God is in
Encouraging you to spend time with her in this season. I do think that having that discernment in that answer will be good
But yeah, I think you're gonna continue to get breakthrough. You're asking God really good questions and you're asking good questions tonight
so let us know how that goes and
Okay. Thank you so much for sharing
Yeah, nothing. I did have one last question though. Um, I don't know if you recall how a
While back that you had said, oh there's a reason why she's in your life again
I don't know if you remember ever saying that to me and I'm just curious if you do remember
Do you know why you thought that I?
Mean, I think she's pulling things out of you that need healed as my general answer
But I have no clue why I said it to you that night
Ladies half the time I'd get off these calls and I couldn't tell you unless I went back and watched the replay
But even then I you know, my I'm going with what I feel like God is bringing up in my spirit
But even hearing you talk tonight
I I do think that there are things that God is revealing to you by being around her
That that do need help, you know
Could he reveal it to you another way for sure?
So it's not like you have to keep going around her and if you don't you're not gonna get healed, you know, I'm saying
Yeah, you'll still walk into healing because I promise you if it's not her
Someone else is gonna come across your path and God will use them to help you know where you need to heal, too
So that's just how it works. It's not necessarily it has to always happen through her
But I just believe that through her coming back into your life
Things have been getting revealed that needed to be. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
It's like when things aren't healed God if he can't get you one way
He'll get to you another because he loves us right? He doesn't want us to be feeling like that or carrying that. Yes
Okay
Yeah, thank you so much Bethany I really appreciate it you're welcome Lisa, thank you so much Tatiana go ahead
Hey, I wasn't really planning on sharing bows like if there's time
But okay, so when you were talking I had there's three memories that like came to my mind
And so I wouldn't necessarily say like imitation or like the two other words
Like resonated it with me tonight
but you talked about like when you were a kid and you were kind of just like living life freely and then something happened and
for me, I noticed that like I definitely pulled back like, um
I've always known that I'm like a very expressive person like I'm very social
I love like just to talk to people and like laugh and
Like just be goofy and like not care about what anybody thinks
And I was that way like in elementary
At my elementary school specifically at my church I was not like that
but like I
Felt like in that time of my life, like I got along so well with everybody and I felt like everybody liked me
Just because like I was always myself like, you know, you're gonna laugh with me, you know
I'm gonna do something so goofy and
I had a memory that came to my mind
Which was I want to say was a probably like in around the time
But I was just in my kitchen and like dancing like nobody's watching literally and then
my dad had come up the stairs and like he saw me and he just like started laughing and
From that moment on like I because usually like at home like I'm always singing like even now
I feel like it's easier for me to just sing like
whenever like my family will tell me to be quiet sometimes cuz I'm just always singing but
Dancing no like from that moment on
Like I only dance in my room by myself
but I like, you know, I make music I perform and so
one of the things is like
Recently, I've started performing more like salsa music and it's so it's like I have to get up there and dance and like really worth
The crowd but I feel like I hold back so much and it wants to come out like it feels kind of like, um
All I can think of is when Jeremiah saying like the word was like
Burning in my heart and like I couldn't hold it back and it feels like it's like a leaping inside of me like wants to
Come out, but part of me is just like no like stick in there
So it's like I can dance but maybe like not
Exactly as much as I want to yeah, so let me ask you this when your dad laughed
Was it kind of like a mocking laugh?
Or was it a laugh like he thought it was cute that you know
Like as your dad like some some parents like I can even think of like times
I saw my girls doing something and I would like laugh, but I wasn't laughing at them
I was laughing because I thought they were adorable
So did you feel like your dad was laughing at you like as in he thought it was silly or?
Or did you feel like he was laughing in adoration?
Mm-hmm.
Okay, this is really interesting because, like, up until, because you know, like, what
I've shared with my dad, like, a lot of things have changed.
And before that, like, perspective shift, in my head, I was always like, oh, he was
laughing at me.
And now I feel like, oh, my gosh, I want to cry, like, I think it was a laugh of, like,
like, like, look at how beautiful my daughter is.
And yeah, I think that that was one, like, a big thing that has shifted for me was like,
I always felt like, because my dad is very intimidating.
And so I always felt like he was a very judgy person, just because I saw him judging other
people.
And just because, like, my dad is really good at, like, reading people.
And so he's always kind of like sizing people up.
But most of that is just like, to protect my family, I feel like, you know, he's just
always kind of watching.
But then sometimes it does go like, into like, hey, like, you're just, you're just criticizing
them now.
And so I feel like I kind of internalize that.
But that's never how he's looked at me.
Yeah, I think genuinely, the reason I asked you that question is I really wondered if
he wasn't making fun of you.
I wrote this down as you were talking, I think that genuinely, this is from the Lord to help
you continue to process this.
I think that you help bring childlikeness out of your dad.
I think that when he sees you, or when he saw you in that moment, you interpreted it
like you had to be, it's kind of like, same thing, they were in the garden, you know,
now their situation was different, you weren't doing anything wrong, they ate at the tree.
So that's the difference there.
But they were hiding.
And God's like, why, you know, why are you hiding?
And so in that moment, it's kind of like, the enemy lied to you and try to get you to
believe that there was a reason you had to feel shame for dancing like nobody was watching
because somebody was watching.
And then when your dad laughed, whatever the enemy said to you in that moment, you partnered
with that.
And so I would encourage you to ask, ask the Lord to reveal what what it was that the enemy
said to you in that moment, too.
And just see if anything does come up, don't don't pressure yourself about it.
If it comes up, it comes up at the dozen, it doesn't, because I still think you can
get massive healing because you're already processing it tonight live with us here.
And really lean into this.
My dad adores me, my dad, I, I bring out childlikeness in my dad, and he loves it, like, just keep
partnering with these things that God is showing you already about your dad.
And honestly, I would even ask him if he remembers when that happened.
Okay, and just tell him like, this is something that I, I felt like maybe you thought, you
know, whatever, whatever it is that you thought now pray about that.
Because if you don't need to say something, don't but just, you may want to consider that
because it could be another healing moment for the two of you all.
Okay.
Yeah.
And you can heal without that.
That's why I want to encourage you to pray first before you do it.
But I think that you're just continuing.
It's really exciting to watch you continuing to see the truth about your dad's perspective
of you.
Because this is also helping you realize that's how God feels about you too.
Yeah, it's really awesome.
Thank you for sharing that with us.
You're welcome.
Ariane.
Hi.
Oh, you're still muted.
Can you hear me?
You're still muted.
Yeah, I could have.
You got it.
Okay.
Yeah.
Um, few things I said in the group that I was like competition, but like silent or passive
competition, like analyzing and then I want to do better not to get criticized.
But something happened Saturday as Jackie talked about God saying seek my face.
And I think I talked about it also in the past with you that my mom would say when I
was a child, like, you know, disappear from my sight.
Like I don't want to see you.
I don't want to whatever with angry.
And it's wow, like God says the opposite seek my face.
So it was very revelation.
But it's still I want to hide.
If I go somewhere, even though like for.
people want to pray for me and I'm completely off the charts and I'm crying and then people
come and I'm really like, don't look at me like I have, uh, I call this, this disease
in the Bible that they, uh, Oh, like leprosy or what? Right. That's how I feel. Um, wow.
And then I get awareness more like, you know, the things my mom punished me for or did not
accept me is for normal things. It's not that I did something wrong. Right. So I have a
lot of, um, the shame you talk about, like you were, um, you know, you didn't want to
go in the, in the, you didn't want to help from your friends. That's how I feel. I'm,
I'm completely shut up. And I, I don't know. And then I get aware that the normal things
became abnormal to me. So I, it wasn't, it was a hot heat wave over here and people
dress, you know, in shorts and some of them don't even know what to wear, but I see a
girl and she's happy and she's on the, with the ears and, and I'm thinking like she's
talking to her friends, whatever. I don't know. But, and this is, this happens. It's
like a default. Like, okay, so it's not for you. There is no reason that it was not that
she was very beautiful or very, it's not for you. And this is what I hear so often. And
you say, yeah, it's not from God, but it's so much by default. Yeah. When people are
happy or, um, you know, um, I remember when I got divorced, you know, you see couples
and they put their arm around them. It's like, yeah, it's not for you. You don't have
it. It's like my safety place. I don't know, but I don't know how to get out of it. And
I, I could cry for days, but it's, it's not, yeah. I don't want to reach the normal.
Yeah. Have you ever done where like, and when I say this, it's not because I don't think
you can do it on your own, but sometimes, you know, ladies, we need intensive, like
where we go somewhere for like a retreat place, but for like an extended amount of
time, where it's just all healing, it's all peaceful. There's no toxicity coming into
our space. Um, have you ever considered doing something like that, Ariane? Like where you
just literally have, you know, several months where you're just in a peaceful setting. I
just feel like, you know, your body tries to convince you that you're still in flight
mode. And that's why some of your defaults are, you know, the reality is, is like, we
can't just change our brain, right? We have to like partner with God in the rewiring and
some of that has to be a supernatural work. Some of that just, you know, the more we heal
will happen over time. You know, you have been through so much that it is, it doesn't
surprise me that that's your default. Even still, you've been doing a great job. I, the
reality is that you're just continuing to heal and it just is going to take time. Um, the
other thing is that, um, when you said that, don't look at me, like kind of that, that
comes up for you. Um, you know, the reality is, is that, you know, even when you tell
us that you struggle with these things, we see you and we love you. It's, it's in person
allowing people to see you in the realness of who you are and realize that some, let
me say it this way too. Some people are going to love me and some people aren't right. That
is just life. I want everyone to love me. I also struggle with people pleasing. So that's
something I grew up in my life. Like I wanted everybody to be peaceful and happy and it
wasn't any of that. But the reality is I've had to just learn that it's really, it's not
easy, but I've just learned like, it's okay if everybody doesn't love Bethany. Now I think
I'm pretty lovable and I think they're crazy for not loving me. Um, you know, but I just
have had to choose to be okay. Even if they don't, because there's five other people who
do so to speak, you know, and so I can focus on the people that do love me and accept me
and give me the space to heal and grow and focus on those people.
versus the ones that don't and and that's not an easy thing especially when
you know you were kind of programmed to believe by the people around you that
you don't matter so part of you like you're turning in your healing process
you're kind of turning the big ship if you will you're kind of turning
something that was sailing a big ship this way you're through the Holy Spirit
he's helping you turn that ship to go in a different direction and retraining our
brain takes time 30 days of thinking the same thought over and over and over
again at least so again I'm not saying this is easy but I want to encourage you
to write down the thoughts that you said tonight don't look at me your mom used
to say disappear from my sight and then I forget what the third one was that you
said but those three things I want to encourage you to write those down but
then write just kind of like when I was telling one of the other ladies write
the opposite of it so like seek my face God is saying to you hey come close to
me do you know that God says he'll even like make a bet like bed in hell to come
be with us and find us and bring us back to him he's not I mean he doesn't even
burn up with that stuff cuz he's light right but here's the reality is he will
go after us because he loves us so much so what's the opposite of don't look at
me it's hey everybody see me because I matter or whatever the opposite is that
God gives you but that's you know we have to break it down ladies and really
get to the kind of the nitty-gritty of some of this stuff but then don't just
do it for one night put it up where you can see it tell yourself remind yourself
you know I always say speaking out loud over yourself speaking the word of God
out loud over yourself is a game changer okay so are you on keep doing keep doing
what you're doing I'm so glad that you were here tonight it's been awesome to
see you I actually have to close our session down I'm really trying to start
ending us at an hour and 15 to an hour and a half at the latest and whatnot so
I'm so glad to hear from all of you tonight but I am gonna pray us out
Deborah I see your hand up now as well if you can put your post in the group
and then I can respond to you there I'd be so grateful for that father thank you
so much for this night God we thank you for all the revealings for healing that
are happening we thank you for change and transformation God we pray that you
would just take these truths to the core of who we are God that you would
help us to see the real us who you originally created us to be without any
blemish without any fault God without any shame guilt condemnation like the
pureness the innocence being restored God we thank you for just that you would
just come tonight God the great physician that you would work in our
hearts in our lives supernaturally in ways that we could not even do it
ourselves God that people will literally wake up tomorrow like
something has broken off of them that they'll just they'll feel freedom in
their spirit in Jesus name amen amen amen God bless you all have a good night
everyone I'll see you in the groups good night