WEBVTT

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All right.

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There we go.

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Good morning.

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This is Men's Heart Check-In, August 3rd, 2026.

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I got some amazing men on this call and got a new guy, Justin, joining the club and glad

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to have him here.

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So, Justin, I'm going to put you out the gate just so everybody gets to know you and where

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are you from?

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What do you like?

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What do you do for a living?

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Like, what do you like to do for fun?

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Well, good evening, everybody.

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Obviously, my name is Justin.

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I am an Arizona native, so I've lived here my whole life.

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I just recently purchased my first new home in Gold Canyon, which is out on the east side

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of town.

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Nice place.

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Grew up in a Christian family.

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I didn't live a Christian lifestyle for a long time, decided it was time to come back

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to the Lord about four years ago, and it's been a wild ride ever since then, pretty much

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hit rock bottom.

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And then he's put me in a place now that is, only God could have done, we'll just put it

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that way.

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I am working for the local utility company, the electrical company, their name is Salt

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River Project, SRP, notoriously hard place to get a job at.

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And I'm training to be a substation electrician right now with them.

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So, things are just looking up in every sense of the word.

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I found Jackie on a podcast from Christian Bevere.

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That's where I saw her.

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I was watching a lot of Christian videos on YouTube at the time, and she was there.

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Is that like Lisa and John's son, I'm assuming?

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Yes, exactly.

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Okay, yeah.

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That's amazing.

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Christian's their daughter-in-law.

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Oh, my bad.

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No, I mean, if you saw a picture of her, you wouldn't be able to mistake her for a man.

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That's for sure.

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Yeah, I'm sure.

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I'm sure.

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I hope not.

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It's so cool.

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Welcome, Justin.

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Thanks, man.

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And we have Blake, too.

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Hey, Blake, are you new?

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I don't recognize...

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Bob?

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Is this your first time?

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Yeah, I'm apparently new.

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And I think I found Jackie through the same podcast.

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Oh, did you?

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Sweet.

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Yeah, Jackie's amazing.

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Jackie and David, I mean, they're friends of mine, as well as like, that's why I'm here.

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Right?

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Like, you know, because I believe in what they're doing.

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And I believe the call in their lives, and they're the most, I mean, legit people you

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can find.

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Right?

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You know, it's so funny, because I met them before I ever came on this.

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I was like, so what do you do?

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She's like, I'm a matchmaker.

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I'm like, what?

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Like, is that even a thing?

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You know, and a year later, I joined the group, because some friends of mine were like, hey,

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you should jump in.

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And so, you know, gosh, I don't even want to share this, guys.

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It's been crazy.

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Because I shared it to you guys, I got to update you.

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But I really, really don't want to.

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So I went to Bethel, got literally stopped on the way out of Bethel by two ladies.

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One of them was like, hey, you looking to get married?

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Are you interested in her?

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We met at the bookstore.

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So we started like a two-week romance that lasted less than two weeks, or a little under

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two weeks.

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But it was good in the way where, because it started, hindsight, actually, I don't know

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hindsight, because literally we were, her friend is like, are you looking to get married?

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It was starting on the like, hey, and so I was like, so you're looking to get married,

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I'm looking to get married.

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Let's just check it out.

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See how we gel.

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We already gelled.

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So it was like, let's just see if we could work it through the details.

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I did not know what, oh, what is it?

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Disorganized attachment was.

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As you guys all hear me talking about how there's like 3% of the women are avoidant.

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Well, so I thought disorganized in my memory was you're sometimes anxious and you're sometimes

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avoidant.

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No, it's just two different strains of avoidant.

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One's fearful and one's another.

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Anyway, as long story short, she, when I was supposed to go see her Saturday, no, Friday

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night, we were going to, we're going to drive, I was going to meet her in Colorado and we're

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going to hang out.

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And she freaked out and she bolted.

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So like, well, and I, you know, like sometimes the trauma, I reminded her of her ex.

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So when, so I said, hey, I'm an ENFP, yeah, I think I'm an ENFP.

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And I'm an Enneagram seven.

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And she's like, what Enneagram seven?

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That's a red flag for me.

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And I'm like, how is a personality type, a red flag, right?

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Like, just so you know, guys, a personality type can't, I mean, you can have issues with

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somebody who is a seven because a lot of them are very irresponsible and they have FOMO

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so they don't commit.

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So, I mean, that is the bad part, but they're also the life of the party and they make everybody

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like having fun and make sure everybody's engaged. So, that's kind of me. I'm more

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the not FOMO guy. And everybody's a gradient, so I hate labels. So, that started it.

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But she did introduce, we started going through a marriage book that she had because I'd never

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heard of it and she just bought it. And it actually is going to revolutionize how I teach.

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Like literally, it blew up all of my paradigms and I'm still trying to,

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I mean, it's based on a lot of fact and I'm still, I do a lot of relationship counseling,

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or coaching, sorry. So, anyways, and like, that's why I say, if you guys ever have any

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questions, I may or may not have the answer, but I can probably help you guys quite a bit.

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That's why when you get the floor. So, the other thing, so let's say you guys,

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if you find somebody, okay, like, let's just say you find somebody you think is

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going to be like worth pursuing down. You've heard of Jackie talk about the Simbis,

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the save your marriage before it starts test. There's this Simbis thing, right? Basically,

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they answer questions, you answer questions, and they show how you guys come together.

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And they'll go like, and I'm really oversimplifying it, but like, just basically,

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here's your strengths, here's your weaknesses, here's where you're going to be strong in your

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relationship, here's where you're going to need some, need to be aware of and make sure that

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you're doing something about. And Simbis is a really good tool to see the things that could

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hurt you in your relationship. Because if you know what's coming, you know where your areas of

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problem are, you can actually just get it out, do something about it before something happens,

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right? So anyways, and there's a bunch of books that I'm not going to get into. But like,

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the books that get you guys talking about one of the biggest problems in marriage and relationships

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is unspoken expectations. Like you grew up in a household, she grew up in a household,

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you both have expectations of how said household is going to be. Then you get into a household,

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and your thought is different than her thought. And that's when like, things fly. So any of the

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tools that get you talking about what our life's going to look like, what is raising kids, I mean,

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like, it depends on which stage of life, if you already have kids, like, but what really important

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one is, what do we do with the kids? Like, well, we're going to send them to a freaking

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boarding school in Boston. And no, I'm going to homeschool, you know, can you see how that might

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be a problem? So So anyways, anybody have some wins? I mean, I guess I won. I've had four

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stunning women come into my life crashed into my life, four weeks in a row. I mean, like, like,

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absurd. Like, I spent so I was supposed to be on a plane on Friday. I wasn't I was super bummed.

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My friends asked me to help out their event. I ended up dancing with this absurdly beautiful

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41 year old for six hours, and we hung out the whole night long. And I didn't think about

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Colorado one bit. You know, there was there was actually 400 women here and like 50 guys,

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it was kind of crazy. But it was but you know, so you never know when the season hits, dude,

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I'm at the gym, and I got like three that are trying to chase me down. So you guys,

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they're out there, we just have to get ourselves ready for it. I just say that to help you to

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encourage you guys, like a lot. One didn't work out. But I could have spent a year or two.

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And then figured out we didn't work. Two weeks. I mean, it sucked, dude, because we were really

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compatible. She is my list. Like she fit everything on my list, other than she couldn't get through

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the trauma of her ex, which you guys, you're gonna be if the whoever you meet has traumatic

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issues with their ex, and they haven't handled them, you're going to trigger those. And unless

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they can work through them. And they can, like, we totally could have worked through it. But she

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needed to be willing to work through it. Sorry, I'm talking a lot. But does that make sense to

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you guys? So that's the update. It's not super sexy. I was wishing it was. Sorry, brother.

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That is rough. I guess my to dovetail off that I guess my win this week is gonna be

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I've got a date on Sunday. Went out to dinner with someone I met through coffee meets bagel,

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which I like that. I like that one. Yeah. I've had mixed. I think it depends on where you're at.

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Yeah, I I seem to get one type of woman but this this one is a little bit different. So she's

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you know, just to be completely transparent, she she's weird.

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And I'm trying to be I was trying to say that over this

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weekend and to tell some people about it. And like, what do you

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mean? What do you mean? I'm like, it's not bad. I'm just

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saying she's weird. Like, if I you got to look at these profile

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pictures, like she's she's weird. And but the weird ones I

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tend to like so I'm just giving

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it to people who are themselves, even if it is weird. So yeah. So

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did you say you're going out like in a week? Like a week from

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yesterday? Or you went Sunday?

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We're going out Sunday night. This Sunday. Just just want to

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clarify. And so we're I was it's been it's been an interesting

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drink is like a like you're saying I had a that lady that

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I've been telling you guys about that blew up and I'm sad about

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it. But I jumped like right after that I jumped back on the

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apps and tried to lock down some dates not wanting to do my

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usual thing where I take a year off of dating. So I turned 40

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this weekend too. So I'm I'm going through a lot of life

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changes. It's a lot.

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Yeah. I'll be 51 in three weeks. So yeah, I'm not really super

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stoked about that either. But yeah, you know, like, but it's

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funny because I have like a 30 year old hitting on me and like

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it just like it's it's insane. So whatever, like, I stopped

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dying my goatee because I had 20 year olds like, Oh, you know,

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like, go. Can I can introduce you to my son who's 23. So but

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that's cool. Christopher waiting to get back on the horse. And

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you know, Friday night, I was Friday. I was I was I was

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thrashed all week, man. Well, because I looked at her post and

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she she's like, I'm so done with dating. I can't do this

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anymore. And I'm like, you were triggered. And you had the she

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had the opportunity to actually have somebody help her heal.

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Her ex did some really terrible things. So like, there's a

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reason she has trauma, right? Like, you know, but so here's

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your guy here.

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Boy, I get to I really feel like sharing all my fun stuff today.

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So. So. All right. Because I'm here. I'm here to help you guys

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win, right? Like, so when I started dating again, after my

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19 year or 20 year relationship with my ex, I noticed a pattern

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I took me a little while to notice, but I noticed the

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pattern. I was projecting her on them. It was it was really I was

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expecting them to be hurt, which was so like, they're like,

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they're a different person. Right? Like, you know, like, but

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so okay, how your subconscious works, it does pattern

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recognition. It doesn't know this is David, this is Justin,

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this is Chris, and Christopher, and Tim, your brain knows these

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are the dudes, right? I think actually, because we're dudes,

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it does disseminate but like, but when it comes to Merrill,

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like romantic relationships, it has one filter. So literally, I

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was having to say, this person is not my ex. And I'd have to

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say that over and over again. And you have to say it verbally,

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because your subconscious is rewired by hearing your own

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voice. So if you ever find yourself looking at people, and

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like, I keep dating the same woman, it may not be that you're

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dating the same woman, it may be that your subconscious is

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patterning, like is, is patterning them to be, because

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there may be some similarities, but they're not the same woman,

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right? And so I had to actually differentiate that the person I

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was dating was not my ex. And then I actually was able to see

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them for who they were. Yeah, so like, it's, it's, it's pattern

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recognition. That's why you get triggered because your brain's

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like, Oh, crap, like pattern, I see a pattern, there's danger

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here. And you're gone, right? It's like, fight or flight go.

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Well, I was actually disassociating, it was so bad,

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right? And I'm like, and I, which actually helped me realize

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like, why am I disassociating with this guy? Oh, because when

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she did this, it was never safe for me with my, my, I had, I

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have domestic violence in my marriage, right? Like, you

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wouldn't think a five, three gal, it never hurt me physically,

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like, I mean, she could hit me with everything she had. But

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emotionally, it was crushing. Right? Like, you know, because I

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would never hit a woman. And like to have her throwing,

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throwing, throwing haymakers, and having to pin her down. So

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she doesn't beat me up. Wasn't super fun. So like, my body is

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like, hey, she's mad at me, she's gonna come at me. And this

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is a whole different person. So anyways, I just share that

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because I want you guys to win. And if you ever noticed like a

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pattern that you keep seeing the same pattern in women, it just,

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it may be that you're just attracting the same woman,

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but it could very well be that your brain is like, this is the same person.

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So, um, little trauma, trauma advice. Um,

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everything's healable. Uh, you know, like neuroplasticity,

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there's nothing that you go through that God can't heal.

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You just need to put in the time. And, um, and so like with this gal,

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I was hoping she would realize she was triggered because I

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triggered her ex wound. Oh, and by the way, most people you meet,

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God brings into your life.

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So you deal with the stuff that you're not dealing with. He's like, Hey,

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let's touch that little point. But, but then you get to hear what it was revealed

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is to be healed. Right. So thank you, Chris. And is that helpful? You guys?

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Um, I just try to, I don't like sharing my crap,

246
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but I think that's pretty good. It might be helpful for some of you guys. Um,

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so yeah, your, your subconscious is pretty predictive. Um,

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and so like if you walk into a place and it's really, yeah, it's really good.

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Like if you're walking down the street and there's people coming around and

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you're seeing stuff, sometimes predictive is great because you're ready because,

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Oh yeah. You know, I was walking through San Francisco and I'm like,

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those dudes are no good. Right. And I'm like,

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and I have my son with me and I was like, dang it. I was like,

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I was like,

255
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I hope they don't stir something up because I can only take two before they're

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going to get it. They're going to get me. And, you know, um, and thankful.

257
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And I was praying under my breath and thankfully they didn't want none,

258
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but like it was, it was pretty, pretty crazy. Um, anyways,

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so any other, any wins guys? Uh, I have something I want to talk about,

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but I just want to make sure that you guys are taken care of and anything in

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the heart work, anything that you are like looking at that you want to talk

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about.

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All right. So, okay. Oh, let me get my phone open. Um,

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so one of the things, um, wanted to talk about tonight, sorry,

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I got all these little screenshots. Um,

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so here you guys in the middle of my divorce,

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I hit two 52, which was dang,

268
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that's heavy. Like I'm at two 28 right now. Right. And, um,

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two 52, I stepped on the scale and I'm like,

270
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I've never been this heavy in my whole life and all the stress eating,

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all the stress, all the stress eating for all the court things and all the kid

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things and all the, I ballooned. And I was just like, dude, this is crazy.

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So then I decided like,

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I'm going to get back to being me and like and love on myself and get my health

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back. And now dude, I feel great. You know, I, you know,

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the power of 90 days. Um, but I, Oh,

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I got rear ended. So I wasn't working out because I was in pain, but I'm like,

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you know what? I'm just going to push through it. I'm going to work through.

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And now I can actually like rotate my shoulders. My traps are working mostly.

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Well, but I share that like in 90 days, you guys, I've,

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I mean, that was like six, eight months ago.

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And now I'm actually back in my body that I'm used to. Oh,

283
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I could see naughty. I could see either way. Right. You either like,

284
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you either aren't hungry or you're like, uh,

285
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I was trying to just calm my stomach. Right. Um,

286
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that was why I was eating a lot is like,

287
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and I didn't realize nuts had like stupid amounts of calories. And you know,

288
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I was like getting the mixed nuts thinking they were healthy.

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And I was going through like two buckets of those. All right. Yeah.

290
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I was doing like two buckets of those a week.

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I don't know how many calories are in one of those things,

292
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but like the Costco thing, let me tell you,

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I stepped on the scale and I was like,

294
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let me tell you, I stepped on the scale. It was like,

295
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I literally levitated because it was going, no, it was digital. But, um,

296
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anyways, so, but, um, so what,

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I share that because qualities that I have is, well, I mean, I, I, I,

298
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I work out and I like, I like having a healthy body, right. I, you know, um,

299
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it also looks great. You're like, shoot the guns and the chicks dig it too,

300
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by the way, you know, like, I mean like, like, and so, but like to you guys,

301
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90 days, right. What can you do? What are, what are some things that you can do?

302
00:19:16.560 --> 00:19:21.080
Um, like I was looking at qualities, like qualities,

303
00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:25.520
you know, I hate to say it, do it for women, dude, because it's such crap.

304
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Like do it for you. But like, women will actually appreciate this. Right.

305
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Does that make sense? I don't ever want to tell you guys, Hey, do this.

306
00:19:33.120 --> 00:19:36.200
So you can get a woman like that's because you're so much more,

307
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but it's live your life. Don't live his life for you.

308
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And when the right woman, but like what, what women like honesty. I mean,

309
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I know there's going to be a shocker, right? Like truth.

310
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Every relationship has to be based on truth. Um,

311
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so if you have issues with honesty, how do you,

312
00:19:52.480 --> 00:19:54.840
can you be more honest in the next 90 days and work on that?

313
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I actually have tried to stop cussing. I am so done.

314
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I'm so done.

315
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:06.160
doing better-ish but like I get so frustrated sometimes like when when people share stories

316
00:20:06.160 --> 00:20:12.000
about how some like the terrible things that happen to them I just I'm like oh and so I've

317
00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:17.200
really worked on it so my next 90 days I'm going to not I will not be cussing in 90 days you guys

318
00:20:17.200 --> 00:20:21.360
because I'm gonna because it's not it's not honoring the lord and I got in a bad habit

319
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during the divorce that I got back into a habit so respect like how do you respect people do you

320
00:20:30.240 --> 00:20:33.840
respect yourself see like dude if you don't respect yourself no woman's nobody else is

321
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going to respect you so how are you doing with loving yourself and respecting yourself

322
00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:42.960
and I struggle with that honestly right I think I'm better at respecting other people than I am me

323
00:20:43.680 --> 00:20:48.480
I tolerate a lot more just I'm getting better at it but I tolerate a lot more disrespect than I

324
00:20:48.480 --> 00:20:54.160
should compassion like maybe you're not compassionate that's a really important

325
00:20:54.160 --> 00:21:02.960
characteristic in a spouse reliability like if you know you have a chance now uh yes that's so

326
00:21:02.960 --> 00:21:09.040
true Justin yeah we're we're the ones that just are destroy us man I'm my own worst enemy like

327
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it's it's it's consistent you know um relied on confidence and so I went and the confidence one

328
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came so you guys so I mean all those are kind of standard procedure things but like confidence

329
00:21:22.560 --> 00:21:29.920
so like David you're a brilliant dude right like and uh Mr. Henshaw um and like I just love how

330
00:21:29.920 --> 00:21:36.960
you think and like stuff like that so like being able to rest in your best like if I were I would

331
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like to give you guys homework right pick out your top three attributes or four attributes like the

332
00:21:44.240 --> 00:21:50.800
things that you're actually good at right and like and then and and you're low you know and um

333
00:21:50.800 --> 00:21:57.040
and really embrace and just be grateful for those and like um when I talk to you about hey find your

334
00:21:57.040 --> 00:22:02.000
type like go on like the one of the points that Jackie does why do we go out on dates it's because

335
00:22:02.000 --> 00:22:06.000
you're figuring out you're getting reps you're figuring out what you like you're getting more

336
00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:10.640
confident yourself and like in in the whole process I mean dude it's still I still have

337
00:22:10.720 --> 00:22:16.320
some really awkward times this weekend Friday night this girl came up and she's like you want

338
00:22:16.320 --> 00:22:22.880
to ride up on me and I'm like what I was like what I don't know I I think I know what that is

339
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:31.360
it is absolutely not and she's like 28 and six two and fully just gorgeous and I'm like run Forrest

340
00:22:31.360 --> 00:22:39.280
run but like like look it was it was crazy and there was probably 20 more and this is a crazy

341
00:22:39.280 --> 00:22:46.640
event but but anyways but like my point is is get some reps even the awkward reps um like um with

342
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Jess the gal who I was um in a relationship for a short time you know I got some reps and I learned

343
00:22:54.400 --> 00:22:58.400
that even when it starts out like on fire I need to decelerate it

344
00:23:00.160 --> 00:23:06.720
you know um there was a lot of things that were um I should have decelerated and I didn't

345
00:23:06.720 --> 00:23:13.200
but then again it wasn't really it was mainly triggers so I think that no matter what we did

346
00:23:13.200 --> 00:23:18.320
there was no getting around the trigger like in the in the point of her ex so but like when you

347
00:23:18.320 --> 00:23:23.120
get into the relationship you see you'll start seeing people's triggers right you'll you'll

348
00:23:23.120 --> 00:23:30.800
start getting more um familiar with asking people out you know one of the things that I try to do

349
00:23:30.800 --> 00:23:36.400
and this may sound stupid or you guys can judge me all you want is I go and ask I go and ask out

350
00:23:36.400 --> 00:23:41.280
the prettiest girl in the room and you know it's ironic you know what's crazy is most of the time

351
00:23:41.280 --> 00:23:50.400
we hang out right is um and you know what you guys I just say like you've heard me say this

352
00:23:50.400 --> 00:23:57.200
a million times you miss 100% of the shots you don't take right and like even if you went dude

353
00:23:57.200 --> 00:24:03.840
even if you go down flaming right you ask the prettiest girl in the room out right now she's

354
00:24:03.840 --> 00:24:09.280
18 and you're 50 like me that's not I'm like prettiest one that like I'm not asking 18 year

355
00:24:09.280 --> 00:24:14.400
old I just want to just clarify you guys Jackie's gonna be like Mike Mike what do you say no but

356
00:24:14.400 --> 00:24:20.000
like you know um Friday night gorgeous girl I didn't know she was 41.

357
00:24:24.800 --> 00:24:29.120
They do leave their home well but okay so here here's here's another thing right

358
00:24:29.120 --> 00:24:34.720
good Friday night my friend invited me to a help without be spiritual covering for an event

359
00:24:34.720 --> 00:24:42.000
that was kind of wild kind of wild that's an understatement but anyways it was really wild

360
00:24:42.000 --> 00:24:48.560
but I met a really cool gal we danced the whole night away it was a blast I was still chatting

361
00:24:48.560 --> 00:24:53.200
with her she's not a believer I got invited I invited her to church like hey why don't you

362
00:24:53.200 --> 00:24:58.320
come to church with me she's like what I was like I told her early on this is so like she's like

363
00:24:58.320 --> 00:25:00.480
I was like hey I'm a basic

364
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:01.760
the pastor, a minister, she's like,

365
00:25:01.760 --> 00:25:02.840
so are you sitting right now?

366
00:25:02.840 --> 00:25:06.080
I was like, no, no, no, I'm not.

367
00:25:06.080 --> 00:25:10.320
But like, so go do something, go to events, like get,

368
00:25:12.920 --> 00:25:16.120
okay, Henry Cloud, and I think you need to go

369
00:25:16.120 --> 00:25:17.800
with the Holy Spirit on this one, okay?

370
00:25:17.800 --> 00:25:21.120
Like Henry Cloud talks about date,

371
00:25:21.120 --> 00:25:23.520
I forget, it's some absurd amount of dates

372
00:25:23.520 --> 00:25:24.840
a week or a month, right?

373
00:25:24.840 --> 00:25:27.400
Is like go out, ask like 15 people out a week,

374
00:25:27.400 --> 00:25:29.600
or I don't remember the exact numbers

375
00:25:29.600 --> 00:25:31.240
because I'm like, I never did it.

376
00:25:31.240 --> 00:25:34.680
Well, the problem with me is like when I ask non-women,

377
00:25:34.680 --> 00:25:39.240
I have a lot of experiences where I ask a non-believer out

378
00:25:39.240 --> 00:25:41.200
and they really want to be intimate.

379
00:25:41.200 --> 00:25:46.160
And so I try to stray away from that

380
00:25:46.160 --> 00:25:48.560
because I don't need temptation,

381
00:25:48.560 --> 00:25:53.120
but like it is good reps just to get experience

382
00:25:53.120 --> 00:25:55.280
walking into places and asking people out,

383
00:25:55.280 --> 00:25:58.160
ask for a coffee, just say hello.

384
00:25:58.200 --> 00:26:01.240
Like, if you're not good at asking for people's numbers,

385
00:26:01.240 --> 00:26:04.560
just work on saying hello, right?

386
00:26:04.560 --> 00:26:07.120
I just say, hey, can I get your Instagram?

387
00:26:07.120 --> 00:26:09.240
I don't ask for numbers, maybe I should.

388
00:26:09.240 --> 00:26:13.760
Like, but my whole point is you guys get the reps built.

389
00:26:13.760 --> 00:26:16.280
The more reps you have, next time when you actually meet

390
00:26:16.280 --> 00:26:17.960
somebody, you're like, hey, I really dig that chick.

391
00:26:17.960 --> 00:26:19.480
I think she looks pretty cool.

392
00:26:19.480 --> 00:26:21.920
Let's have a go, I want to go get to know her.

393
00:26:21.920 --> 00:26:22.840
And you just say hi.

394
00:26:22.840 --> 00:26:26.840
And like, dude, Eva, Eva,

395
00:26:27.800 --> 00:26:30.040
Friday night, she walks in smoking, dude.

396
00:26:30.040 --> 00:26:32.000
Like just absolutely smoking.

397
00:26:32.000 --> 00:26:35.360
She's in a black dress, dress to kill.

398
00:26:35.360 --> 00:26:37.200
And I'm like, hey, how you doing?

399
00:26:37.200 --> 00:26:38.200
She's like, good.

400
00:26:38.200 --> 00:26:41.680
We spent the whole night talking and dancing, right?

401
00:26:41.680 --> 00:26:44.320
I just said, hey, what's going on?

402
00:26:44.320 --> 00:26:46.800
You know, you're here, you're early to the event.

403
00:26:46.800 --> 00:26:49.920
And so like, we just had fun.

404
00:26:49.920 --> 00:26:52.640
There was no, it wasn't weird.

405
00:26:52.640 --> 00:26:55.640
And so like, get some reps, ask,

406
00:26:55.640 --> 00:26:56.600
if you're at a coffee shop,

407
00:26:57.360 --> 00:26:59.280
say, hey, can I buy your coffee and have a combo?

408
00:26:59.280 --> 00:27:03.560
Like use things that are in your realm.

409
00:27:03.560 --> 00:27:05.680
And I don't, and I'm like, Justin,

410
00:27:05.680 --> 00:27:07.840
I don't know where you're at.

411
00:27:07.840 --> 00:27:09.760
I know you're in Arizona.

412
00:27:09.760 --> 00:27:12.480
I mean, my grandparents, great grandparents

413
00:27:12.480 --> 00:27:14.240
were in the Verde Valley, which is Cottonwood,

414
00:27:14.240 --> 00:27:17.080
like an hour from Flagstaff.

415
00:27:17.080 --> 00:27:21.040
But if you know there's a conference,

416
00:27:22.120 --> 00:27:23.960
oh, okay, so yeah, yeah.

417
00:27:23.960 --> 00:27:25.040
So you got a lot of stuff.

418
00:27:25.040 --> 00:27:25.880
You got Mesa.

419
00:27:26.360 --> 00:27:30.120
You got, anyways, I forget.

420
00:27:30.120 --> 00:27:32.520
But like, if there's a conference there,

421
00:27:32.520 --> 00:27:33.920
so I go to Bethel.

422
00:27:33.920 --> 00:27:36.960
Every time I go to Bethel, I am looking

423
00:27:37.840 --> 00:27:39.200
because I know there's people there

424
00:27:39.200 --> 00:27:42.640
that are gonna be running in a similar direction as I am.

425
00:27:42.640 --> 00:27:46.480
And I found one in the bookstore, right?

426
00:27:46.480 --> 00:27:49.480
And we got into a relationship and then it didn't work out.

427
00:27:49.480 --> 00:27:52.960
But like, but I got the reps, I got some practice.

428
00:27:52.960 --> 00:27:53.800
I learned some things.

429
00:27:53.800 --> 00:27:55.480
She gave me some feedback and she's like,

430
00:27:56.400 --> 00:28:01.400
and so it was a positive experience.

431
00:28:03.320 --> 00:28:04.800
Is that helpful for you guys?

432
00:28:04.800 --> 00:28:07.360
Like, because I want, like confidence comes

433
00:28:07.360 --> 00:28:10.000
from doing things and just walking in a room.

434
00:28:10.000 --> 00:28:11.080
What kind of events?

435
00:28:12.040 --> 00:28:15.080
Look up Christian conferences, right?

436
00:28:15.080 --> 00:28:19.240
Like, or church, anything, any church

437
00:28:19.240 --> 00:28:22.920
that's throwing a frickin' whatever, right?

438
00:28:23.080 --> 00:28:25.640
It only takes, dude, it only takes one thing.

439
00:28:25.640 --> 00:28:28.960
Like Jess, I was going into Bethel bookstore

440
00:28:28.960 --> 00:28:29.840
to buy an anointing oil.

441
00:28:29.840 --> 00:28:31.160
That's where I buy my anointing oil.

442
00:28:31.160 --> 00:28:33.480
Don't ask me, I just do.

443
00:28:33.480 --> 00:28:35.480
And I ran out, so I went in there

444
00:28:35.480 --> 00:28:40.400
and I'm this frickin', she looked like she's 26.

445
00:28:40.400 --> 00:28:42.640
I never would have asked her out, right?

446
00:28:42.640 --> 00:28:44.840
I mean, and she's so beautiful.

447
00:28:44.840 --> 00:28:47.040
Like, she's unbelievably beautiful.

448
00:28:47.040 --> 00:28:49.280
And then her friend like literally shanghaies me

449
00:28:49.280 --> 00:28:51.440
in the parking lot and says, do you wanna get married?

450
00:28:51.440 --> 00:28:52.840
Are you looking to get married?

451
00:28:53.640 --> 00:28:56.920
And so like, all I did was walk into a bookstore

452
00:28:56.920 --> 00:29:00.840
and I interviewed, like, so if you're out there,

453
00:29:00.840 --> 00:29:01.680
it can happen.

454
00:29:01.680 --> 00:29:04.360
If you're sitting at home, unless there's some hot

455
00:29:04.360 --> 00:29:08.200
like Amazon delivery chick, but what are the odds

456
00:29:08.200 --> 00:29:10.360
of them being a Christian and like,

457
00:29:10.360 --> 00:29:12.400
and then like, it'd be kind of awkward.

458
00:29:12.400 --> 00:29:15.280
Like, hey, like, how do you start?

459
00:29:15.280 --> 00:29:17.360
I don't know how to start that conversation.

460
00:29:17.360 --> 00:29:18.440
You're quite the delivery.

461
00:29:18.440 --> 00:29:19.280
I don't know.

462
00:29:19.320 --> 00:29:20.400
I don't know.

463
00:29:22.040 --> 00:29:23.240
Don't drink that, guys.

464
00:29:23.240 --> 00:29:24.160
I'm sorry.

465
00:29:24.160 --> 00:29:26.480
But like, but you guys had fun.

466
00:29:26.480 --> 00:29:28.520
Just have, like, I don't know about you,

467
00:29:28.520 --> 00:29:33.520
but I used, I stopped caring and just started being me

468
00:29:33.800 --> 00:29:35.520
and I'm having fun.

469
00:29:35.520 --> 00:29:38.040
Dude, this gal in the gym was flirting with me

470
00:29:38.040 --> 00:29:40.080
and I'm like, so, like, you know?

471
00:29:40.080 --> 00:29:42.320
I was like, you know, and we're probably gonna go out

472
00:29:42.320 --> 00:29:43.160
on a date.

473
00:29:43.160 --> 00:29:44.200
I mean, I don't know.

474
00:29:44.200 --> 00:29:48.520
Like, she's 31 and I'm like, that's crazy.

475
00:29:48.560 --> 00:29:51.640
I don't know about the age gap, but she's a cool gal.

476
00:29:51.640 --> 00:29:52.800
We had some fun.

477
00:29:52.800 --> 00:29:56.320
Like, you know, her form and working out sucks.

478
00:29:56.320 --> 00:29:57.280
So I'm like, don't hurt yourself.

479
00:29:57.280 --> 00:29:58.120
Do this.

480
00:29:58.120 --> 00:29:59.960
Like, I just was being a dad.

481
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.040
Like, you know, being a coach, it's like, hey,

482
00:30:02.040 --> 00:30:02.920
the way you're doing that, you're

483
00:30:02.920 --> 00:30:03.960
going to trash your back.

484
00:30:03.960 --> 00:30:06.800
Like, you're going to lock out and just do the extensions.

485
00:30:06.800 --> 00:30:10.600
And if you're trying to work this, it's not working.

486
00:30:10.600 --> 00:30:12.440
But like, just be you.

487
00:30:12.440 --> 00:30:13.160
That's me.

488
00:30:13.160 --> 00:30:13.960
Don't be me.

489
00:30:13.960 --> 00:30:15.120
Be you.

490
00:30:15.120 --> 00:30:19.120
David, you are a great guy.

491
00:30:19.120 --> 00:30:21.360
I would love to just sit there and have a conversation

492
00:30:21.360 --> 00:30:22.360
with you, right?

493
00:30:22.360 --> 00:30:24.360
Like, so get in a conversation with ladies, dude.

494
00:30:24.360 --> 00:30:27.560
You're great at conversation, right?

495
00:30:27.560 --> 00:30:28.520
That's something.

496
00:30:28.520 --> 00:30:30.120
And Justin, I just met you.

497
00:30:30.120 --> 00:30:36.520
Chris, you're really good at, like, you're engaging, right?

498
00:30:36.520 --> 00:30:38.600
And you're wise.

499
00:30:38.600 --> 00:30:42.120
I like the weird, like, I don't like cookie cutter people.

500
00:30:42.120 --> 00:30:44.680
I like the ones that are actually uniquely themselves,

501
00:30:44.680 --> 00:30:45.200
right?

502
00:30:45.200 --> 00:30:46.720
And Chris, you're uniquely yourself.

503
00:30:46.720 --> 00:30:48.680
And be uniquely yourself.

504
00:30:48.680 --> 00:30:52.720
David, be, like, all of you guys, be yourself.

505
00:30:52.720 --> 00:30:53.720
Have fun.

506
00:30:53.720 --> 00:30:54.720
Make it fun.

507
00:30:54.720 --> 00:30:56.520
Like, you know, if you're like, oh my gosh,

508
00:30:56.520 --> 00:30:58.560
I got to ask her out, and she's like a 22.

509
00:30:58.560 --> 00:31:02.440
And like, oh my god, you're already lost.

510
00:31:02.440 --> 00:31:04.680
But it's like, hey, you know what?

511
00:31:04.680 --> 00:31:07.720
The most beautiful woman in the room rarely gets asked out.

512
00:31:07.720 --> 00:31:12.640
I think the big thing the enemy has done in modern culture,

513
00:31:12.640 --> 00:31:16.320
and especially if you're living out in California like I am,

514
00:31:16.320 --> 00:31:21.880
is it's like, oh, women, don't talk to me.

515
00:31:21.880 --> 00:31:24.680
You know, I'd rather have a bear approach me than a man.

516
00:31:24.720 --> 00:31:28.000
You know, those kinds of things that kind of get in your head.

517
00:31:28.000 --> 00:31:30.120
And I know that I'm guilty of believing

518
00:31:30.120 --> 00:31:31.200
those kinds of things.

519
00:31:31.200 --> 00:31:32.440
And it can be true, hon.

520
00:31:32.440 --> 00:31:33.080
I know it is.

521
00:31:33.080 --> 00:31:34.040
It's too often.

522
00:31:34.040 --> 00:31:36.240
No, I don't want to discredit that.

523
00:31:36.240 --> 00:31:40.160
I can go, oh, like, dude, like, I get smoked.

524
00:31:40.160 --> 00:31:41.800
Like, I get on flames sometimes, you guys.

525
00:31:41.800 --> 00:31:44.000
I'm not saying that every time I talk with somebody.

526
00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:46.400
They're like, but quite often it is, right?

527
00:31:46.400 --> 00:31:46.920
So yeah.

528
00:31:46.920 --> 00:31:51.960
And I think that you get better at reading those situations.

529
00:31:51.960 --> 00:31:54.640
But if you never put yourself in those situations

530
00:31:54.640 --> 00:31:57.120
where you go up to someone like, um, no, please, no,

531
00:31:57.120 --> 00:31:59.840
then it's getting over that discomfort.

532
00:31:59.840 --> 00:32:03.400
It's not internalizing the, well, she rejected me.

533
00:32:03.400 --> 00:32:05.640
But she would have rejected pretty much everybody

534
00:32:05.640 --> 00:32:08.080
except her Prince Charming that would have walked up

535
00:32:08.080 --> 00:32:09.240
that she had in her head.

536
00:32:09.240 --> 00:32:10.680
She's got her own things going on.

537
00:32:10.680 --> 00:32:13.080
And it's not me, necessarily.

538
00:32:13.080 --> 00:32:14.040
Maybe I'm not her type.

539
00:32:14.040 --> 00:32:15.080
Maybe it wouldn't have worked out.

540
00:32:15.080 --> 00:32:16.840
But she didn't give me the time of day.

541
00:32:16.840 --> 00:32:19.880
That's not necessarily reflection.

542
00:32:19.880 --> 00:32:21.320
I'm like, I'm not creepy.

543
00:32:21.320 --> 00:32:22.480
I'm not ugly.

544
00:32:22.520 --> 00:32:24.560
I'm not horrifying.

545
00:32:24.560 --> 00:32:25.920
It's OK.

546
00:32:25.920 --> 00:32:27.840
I'm better at not internalizing that now.

547
00:32:27.840 --> 00:32:30.200
But I was really bad at it years ago.

548
00:32:30.200 --> 00:32:30.960
Yeah.

549
00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:36.200
Well, and you guys, you know what's amazing?

550
00:32:36.200 --> 00:32:38.720
I always say this about women.

551
00:32:38.720 --> 00:32:41.320
I'm like, dude, none of them are in shape.

552
00:32:41.320 --> 00:32:43.320
In my age range, it seems like everybody falls off

553
00:32:43.320 --> 00:32:44.720
the freaking planet, right?

554
00:32:44.720 --> 00:32:47.320
I asked a guy, I asked Ava, I was like,

555
00:32:47.320 --> 00:32:48.520
so how old do you think I am?

556
00:32:48.520 --> 00:32:49.400
She's like, what, 35?

557
00:32:49.400 --> 00:32:51.080
I'm like, sweet, dude.

558
00:32:51.080 --> 00:32:54.920
I was like, man, I'll be 51, right?

559
00:32:54.920 --> 00:33:00.000
So guys, if you need help getting in shape, let me know.

560
00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:01.280
I can help you guys, right?

561
00:33:01.280 --> 00:33:02.640
Get higher protein.

562
00:33:02.640 --> 00:33:04.720
But you'll feel better.

563
00:33:04.720 --> 00:33:06.920
First of all, you'll feel better.

564
00:33:06.920 --> 00:33:10.280
And you'll have more energy to actually go do things.

565
00:33:10.280 --> 00:33:12.960
And you're not going to be self-conscious of, oh, damn,

566
00:33:12.960 --> 00:33:15.160
I got a beer gut.

567
00:33:15.160 --> 00:33:20.240
And even if you do own it, be comfortable on your skin.

568
00:33:20.240 --> 00:33:24.200
But what can you do in your life

569
00:33:24.200 --> 00:33:26.640
to maximize what you're good at?

570
00:33:26.640 --> 00:33:29.920
David, I would work on, I mean, you

571
00:33:29.920 --> 00:33:31.520
have the conversational skills.

572
00:33:31.520 --> 00:33:33.200
Just get somebody in a conversation.

573
00:33:33.200 --> 00:33:35.800
And things are real crazy.

574
00:33:35.800 --> 00:33:37.640
And you're a brilliant guy.

575
00:33:37.640 --> 00:33:40.640
Just get in a conversation.

576
00:33:40.640 --> 00:33:42.360
And if they can't get in a conversation,

577
00:33:42.360 --> 00:33:43.600
you're never going to want to be with them

578
00:33:43.600 --> 00:33:46.840
because you actually need somebody who is intellectually

579
00:33:46.840 --> 00:33:48.120
compatible, right?

580
00:33:48.160 --> 00:33:50.960
But you won't know that unless you get in a conversation.

581
00:33:50.960 --> 00:33:54.080
And Justin, you look like you're pretty studly.

582
00:33:54.080 --> 00:33:56.080
Just own your stuff.

583
00:33:56.080 --> 00:33:56.760
Dress.

584
00:33:56.760 --> 00:33:58.160
Smell good.

585
00:33:58.160 --> 00:34:01.040
You guys, cut your nails.

586
00:34:01.040 --> 00:34:03.280
Dude, I sound stupid.

587
00:34:03.280 --> 00:34:05.160
Dude, get your nose waxed.

588
00:34:05.160 --> 00:34:05.640
Whatever.

589
00:34:05.640 --> 00:34:07.880
Women, pay attention to the little details.

590
00:34:07.880 --> 00:34:09.880
Show up as your best self.

591
00:34:09.880 --> 00:34:11.280
Take care of you.

592
00:34:11.280 --> 00:34:12.320
They notice that.

593
00:34:12.320 --> 00:34:13.360
They notice if you don't.

594
00:34:13.360 --> 00:34:14.960
They notice if you do, right?

595
00:34:14.960 --> 00:34:17.159
Little things that show that you actually

596
00:34:17.159 --> 00:34:18.920
have care in yourself.

597
00:34:18.920 --> 00:34:20.520
Like the way you carry yourself.

598
00:34:20.520 --> 00:34:22.760
The way you, like, find a cologne you like.

599
00:34:22.760 --> 00:34:24.520
Find a thing you're sure sent.

600
00:34:24.520 --> 00:34:25.400
And own it.

601
00:34:25.400 --> 00:34:26.520
Find one you like.

602
00:34:26.520 --> 00:34:29.960
Just don't make, like, OK, I'm sharing all the bad.

603
00:34:29.960 --> 00:34:31.880
Like, I'm telling you what not to do, right?

604
00:34:31.880 --> 00:34:35.639
So I'm sitting, and I had my favorite cologne.

605
00:34:35.639 --> 00:34:39.040
And I'm at the, I think it was a Walgreens or a Rite Aid

606
00:34:39.040 --> 00:34:40.080
or whatever.

607
00:34:40.080 --> 00:34:42.760
And there's this, like, 18-year-old behind me.

608
00:34:42.800 --> 00:34:44.960
Man, that guy smells like my dad.

609
00:34:44.960 --> 00:34:47.800
Last time I ever wore that cologne.

610
00:34:47.800 --> 00:34:55.760
I was like, don't do that, right?

611
00:34:55.760 --> 00:34:57.160
But, like, find something.

612
00:34:57.160 --> 00:34:59.040
Look up, like, you know.

613
00:34:59.040 --> 00:35:01.280
But, like, smell good.

614
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:03.320
Look good feel good. Like if you are walking

615
00:35:04.080 --> 00:35:10.080
Like you're you're confident in yourself that shows and when you walk up to somebody say hey

616
00:35:10.600 --> 00:35:18.360
like cool most dude, I I could have like I could have struck up 50 conversations Friday night and

617
00:35:18.360 --> 00:35:22.100
what and how to come and hang hung out with all these women because

618
00:35:23.040 --> 00:35:25.040
It was really really

619
00:35:25.400 --> 00:35:27.440
Disproportionate in how many women were there to man?

620
00:35:27.440 --> 00:35:34.120
It was so bad like and they were all dressed up with nowhere to go. But like and there but like

621
00:35:35.120 --> 00:35:40.000
Go places get out grocery stores guys. Like I can't tell you

622
00:35:40.600 --> 00:35:43.160
Like how many conversations I get it at a grocery store

623
00:35:43.160 --> 00:35:46.400
I don't know if women are looking for men in grocery stores or whatever

624
00:35:46.400 --> 00:35:51.400
Maybe like it's like but like I've had great conversations at Costco

625
00:35:51.920 --> 00:35:58.600
You know, I mean now I'm navigating the flirting conferting thing right now

626
00:35:59.360 --> 00:36:00.400
I'm

627
00:36:00.400 --> 00:36:02.400
Really not sure quite how to do that

628
00:36:03.520 --> 00:36:06.960
Because I have two gals who like one of them are trying to get to church

629
00:36:07.600 --> 00:36:12.180
And I was like, and you know, I'm gonna say hey, you know, I really want you in heaven with me

630
00:36:12.820 --> 00:36:18.520
Because it's true, right, you know, but like be yourself be true. But what can you do 90 days?

631
00:36:18.520 --> 00:36:24.080
I got I in 90 days got in shape and I've kept it up for a year now like a year now and

632
00:36:24.560 --> 00:36:29.480
Now my biceps are coming back which were basic but like and my shoulders are so as

633
00:36:30.280 --> 00:36:37.600
After 40 you lose what 3% of your muscle a year unless you do something to combat it

634
00:36:37.600 --> 00:36:43.960
And then your butt like you're always we're always slouched forward. So then everything's out of position and it just hurts and you're miserable

635
00:36:43.960 --> 00:36:46.840
I don't know about you but like that was my life

636
00:36:46.840 --> 00:36:49.200
And so now that I'm actually in shape, I don't hurt as much

637
00:36:50.040 --> 00:36:56.600
Other than when I do leg day, but like that's a whole nother that's that's that's but that's something like get on a diet like

638
00:36:57.120 --> 00:36:58.320
like

639
00:36:58.320 --> 00:37:02.040
diets when I say diet make one choice in your

640
00:37:02.720 --> 00:37:09.320
In your habits that are healthy for you. And in 90 days, you may be a completely different person, right?

641
00:37:09.880 --> 00:37:15.800
Communication like if you're if you if you struggle talking with people talk to everybody

642
00:37:16.840 --> 00:37:18.480
you know, like

643
00:37:18.480 --> 00:37:22.680
Is this making sense? I I I would love to say hey you

644
00:37:23.320 --> 00:37:28.680
David here's your five. Here's your five fold thing do these five things and in 90 days

645
00:37:28.680 --> 00:37:32.120
You're gonna be a the David you're gonna look back and go who is that dude?

646
00:37:32.120 --> 00:37:35.600
I look back at pictures from a couple years ago. I'm like, who is that scrub?

647
00:37:36.120 --> 00:37:38.120
Right. So is it I

648
00:37:38.280 --> 00:37:44.080
Like the whole 90 day thing because that's exactly what I'm focusing on now that it's like already the third of this month

649
00:37:44.480 --> 00:37:51.360
Yeah, so I got 90 days to really improve on some things but the biggest thing is I just want to be consistent in

650
00:37:51.920 --> 00:37:54.160
Getting out there and at least doing

651
00:37:54.680 --> 00:38:02.580
Bare minimum of some calisthenics and some cardio which would be like at one point. I was walking five miles every day

652
00:38:03.000 --> 00:38:04.480
yeah, and

653
00:38:04.480 --> 00:38:08.320
and but the thing is the thing that's gonna block me now is just

654
00:38:08.760 --> 00:38:12.720
Some financial chaos because the car accident and because of not feeling the best

655
00:38:13.320 --> 00:38:19.340
Yeah, all this weird stuff getting stirred up by going the chiropractor now three times a week because of the car accident

656
00:38:22.680 --> 00:38:27.080
So, yeah, the so the 90-day thing that yeah, that's

657
00:38:27.860 --> 00:38:29.860
Where I'm tracking a lot right now. So yeah

658
00:38:31.680 --> 00:38:36.680
Pick one thing and here you guys if you go five days and you

659
00:38:37.680 --> 00:38:42.680
Fall flat just get get back hit the reset button get back on

660
00:38:43.360 --> 00:38:48.400
Right, like and David you're in your circumstances. I mean you didn't want to get hit, dude

661
00:38:48.400 --> 00:38:52.440
I didn't want to get rear-ended and totally jack up my neck and spend the next while

662
00:38:53.280 --> 00:38:57.280
Rehabbing right? It sucks. And I I want to validate that but like

663
00:38:58.520 --> 00:39:04.920
You guys I don't do I I've dropped four inches on my waist. Okay, I've done no cardio

664
00:39:05.920 --> 00:39:12.720
Weight training weight training weight training high-protein diet weight training weight burns more fat more fat

665
00:39:12.720 --> 00:39:15.820
I mean more calories than fat and like

666
00:39:17.080 --> 00:39:22.540
Abs don't even do abs because if you do and if you do a full body workout you work your core. I mean

667
00:39:24.280 --> 00:39:29.480
So I just I hate being a gerbil so if you hate being a gerbil weight lift

668
00:39:30.560 --> 00:39:32.560
right, I

669
00:39:33.080 --> 00:39:39.320
Was I just hike I I don't I don't do that I cannot if Stairmaster maybe because I

670
00:39:40.280 --> 00:39:46.280
Master is legit. Like that'll kick your butt dude. Like that'll build like I hate the Stairmaster, but that thing destroys me

671
00:39:46.280 --> 00:39:48.680
but but like my point is

672
00:39:49.640 --> 00:39:54.400
Okay, so I was going to the gym and I was on the bike for an hour and I was doing all this stuff and I

673
00:39:54.400 --> 00:40:00.000
Was just miserable. I'm like dude, why would I ever want it? And so now I just go and I do a

674
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:05.880
45-minute workout before work and depending on my body's feeling I do it like what was today today was

675
00:40:07.400 --> 00:40:13.820
Farmers carry which is like where you like carry two big things like buckets and cruise around look super awkward and their gym

676
00:40:13.820 --> 00:40:19.480
It's awesome. Actually the chicks were like, hey, what's that? But I'm like, no anyways, but I think I do gym

677
00:40:19.480 --> 00:40:24.960
Like there's there's trouble there though, bro. Like I don't know who's believers or not, but like join a gym

678
00:40:25.800 --> 00:40:32.800
That well like or a group that like a hike like Christopher for you a hiking group like whatever

679
00:40:33.520 --> 00:40:35.520
Whatever will be fun for you

680
00:40:35.640 --> 00:40:42.960
Like but I just say weight training heavy build muscle like eat the protein to so you actually gain

681
00:40:42.960 --> 00:40:44.960
Get the gains that you're looking for

682
00:40:45.200 --> 00:40:49.320
To reverse muscle loss. That's really important and you'll drop fat

683
00:40:49.960 --> 00:40:51.920
Significantly like I said, I dropped four inches on my waist

684
00:40:51.920 --> 00:40:56.040
I had to buy new clothes because my freaking shorts around my ankles because there's

685
00:40:56.760 --> 00:40:59.500
There's nothing left to hold them up, right? And so

686
00:41:01.360 --> 00:41:04.880
Tim yeah, and so like and so Dan like you but I

687
00:41:05.440 --> 00:41:09.000
The only reason why I'm gonna you will hear me hammer

688
00:41:09.760 --> 00:41:15.760
Muscle right is because the number one key to longevity in life is muscle mass

689
00:41:16.440 --> 00:41:21.040
Skeletal muscle mass. So if you're not building muscle by doing actually

690
00:41:22.120 --> 00:41:26.400
Into some weight training of some sort. You're you're not

691
00:41:29.600 --> 00:41:31.200
It's just not the best

692
00:41:31.200 --> 00:41:34.000
But you know and like you don't have to get yoke

693
00:41:34.200 --> 00:41:40.120
I'm actually I'm looking at putting another 30 pounds of muscle on because I know I'm 50 and right now

694
00:41:40.120 --> 00:41:42.120
I'm building for when I'm 80

695
00:41:42.640 --> 00:41:45.520
Does that make sense I'm looking with the future in mind

696
00:41:45.520 --> 00:41:50.200
I'm building for when I'm 80 because right now I don't need all the muscle mass that I have but I'm gonna need it when

697
00:41:50.200 --> 00:41:52.280
I'm 80 or when I'm 95 100 and

698
00:41:52.840 --> 00:41:56.960
So I just the reason why I share that is it and I tell ladies the same thing

699
00:41:56.960 --> 00:41:59.200
I mean, I watch them on the frickin I was like, dude

700
00:41:59.200 --> 00:42:02.040
You just worked out with weights and now you're okay

701
00:42:02.200 --> 00:42:06.660
If you're gonna work out heavy and build muscle do not do cardio on the same day

702
00:42:07.320 --> 00:42:09.120
because you

703
00:42:09.240 --> 00:42:12.720
Don't like I explained I'll just you need your body to

704
00:42:13.440 --> 00:42:18.000
the cardio burns the gains that you have right and so

705
00:42:18.760 --> 00:42:25.100
And I don't want to make this all about workout, but I I'm just the whole point is you guys do something get healthy

706
00:42:25.640 --> 00:42:31.360
If you have a problem communicate like getting out there just say hi to all ladies like on the street

707
00:42:31.360 --> 00:42:36.920
I guess you know they graduate to younger younger younger or get used to just talking to people

708
00:42:37.200 --> 00:42:42.080
So where it's just a reflex not like oh my gosh, she's beautiful

709
00:42:42.320 --> 00:42:42.920
Yeah

710
00:42:42.920 --> 00:42:47.440
there's a lot of beautiful and there a lot of there's a lot of beautiful on the outside but not beautiful on the inside and

711
00:42:47.440 --> 00:42:50.800
You'll find that in a conversation immediately and like Chris you're talking about

712
00:42:50.880 --> 00:42:55.280
Yeah, some of them are like, you know, like some of them are terrible like they're man-eaters

713
00:42:55.280 --> 00:42:58.480
I mean, I've been eaten I've been bit by several of them like I'm like, wow

714
00:42:59.840 --> 00:43:05.400
Like and so you're like, oh, well, that's not gonna work. But you guys there's so many that are like, hey, how are you?

715
00:43:06.080 --> 00:43:11.720
Cool and I'm like, wow, I mean she's like a 20 on a scale of 10 and we're having a conversation

716
00:43:12.280 --> 00:43:14.280
And we're having fun. I'm like, oh

717
00:43:14.920 --> 00:43:18.880
I will say I was a little bit spoiled by getting my new job that

718
00:43:19.800 --> 00:43:24.520
You know because I dispatch and I talked to people on the phone for all day. It's

719
00:43:25.040 --> 00:43:30.320
He's giving me a more confidence with communicating with people that has made the dating world a lot different

720
00:43:30.320 --> 00:43:33.000
I don't think I fully realized how

721
00:43:33.680 --> 00:43:35.680
Great that was

722
00:43:36.640 --> 00:43:43.320
Even with Jess you guys I I got rusty and I I I'm lamenting that I

723
00:43:44.640 --> 00:43:48.280
You know, I got excited and I was rusty had been a while since I'd actually

724
00:43:48.960 --> 00:43:52.120
well, I was kind of shocked that it was going forward because usually

725
00:43:53.080 --> 00:43:56.600
But like I talked to somebody and it goes like great great. And then I'm like, okay

726
00:43:57.000 --> 00:44:02.040
There's like these pitfalls kids or being able to move relocate like, you know

727
00:44:02.280 --> 00:44:04.280
like there's different little things that always

728
00:44:05.360 --> 00:44:09.840
Have a tendency to spoil it Trump Donald Trump blew up one that I thought was amazing

729
00:44:10.440 --> 00:44:15.280
She's like F. She's like F Trump and I'm like, oh, this is not I don't think this is gonna go super

730
00:44:15.280 --> 00:44:21.600
well, because like, you know, and so and she ended up walking like like as soon as I said

731
00:44:21.600 --> 00:44:24.320
I voted for Trump not super fan of him and I

732
00:44:25.160 --> 00:44:29.480
Think he's the best biblical vote, but like some of the stuff he does drives me crazy

733
00:44:29.800 --> 00:44:35.000
It's not but you know, I'm like it but like she's like check, please and I'm like, wow

734
00:44:35.920 --> 00:44:40.720
We had this great connection and like I voted for Trump and you're done

735
00:44:41.240 --> 00:44:48.120
Completely done. So so like, you know, like I can't I kept running it. So now like like like so, you know

736
00:44:48.120 --> 00:44:51.640
I voted for Trump. I hope that's not an issue with you, but like, you know, like

737
00:44:52.280 --> 00:44:55.400
Get it out. But you guys I at least learned

738
00:44:55.400 --> 00:45:00.040
Like and I've got the reps and you know, so I found somebody who went through all the

739
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:05.760
things the gauntlet and didn't get triggered until then i reminded of her ex and that's

740
00:45:05.760 --> 00:45:11.040
not a whole lot i can do with that because i'm not her ex but if she can't see me as her not her ex

741
00:45:12.080 --> 00:45:20.320
but like yeah like i know that like i don't want to keep poking at things that aren't the the

742
00:45:21.600 --> 00:45:28.640
funnest but um that person that fell through after like two weeks i mean are they even willing

743
00:45:28.640 --> 00:45:32.800
to like be involved in a program like last year singles because if they're not even willing to be

744
00:45:32.800 --> 00:45:38.000
doing that then that's why you probably have to walk away so she she'd done a ton of hard work

745
00:45:38.000 --> 00:45:46.560
ton ton ton ton but here okay here again okay you guys um i just share all the i don't i hate being

746
00:45:46.560 --> 00:45:53.840
the poster boy for like here here's how it blows up right like but so when you're in a relationship

747
00:45:53.840 --> 00:45:58.240
with somebody and it's like let's say mid-level like you're just getting to know them right

748
00:45:58.320 --> 00:46:05.680
there's not a lot of um stuff that'll boil up well if it does at that point then there may be

749
00:46:05.680 --> 00:46:09.440
some heartwork issues that need to happen if you're just having normal conversations and

750
00:46:09.440 --> 00:46:15.120
they're flipping out or like you know but this was one where we actually were in relationship

751
00:46:15.760 --> 00:46:19.680
like like we agreed that we were going to go see how it was going forward so we were in

752
00:46:19.680 --> 00:46:25.280
she was my girlfriend right like we agreed that that's what we were going to do and so um you

753
00:46:25.280 --> 00:46:31.520
know jackie says that um what's what's broken in relationship needs to be healed in relationship i

754
00:46:31.520 --> 00:46:38.240
think or something to that effect right so what happened was she was fine as long as we were

755
00:46:39.440 --> 00:46:44.720
three-quarter level like like 90 of the way we had 90 conversations where we were like completely

756
00:46:44.720 --> 00:46:51.280
compatible but that last where it really got real touched a point of her heart that couldn't be

757
00:46:51.280 --> 00:47:02.000
accessed until how do i explain that like vulnerability right it was a level of vulnerability

758
00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:08.960
that she doesn't experience all the time and when that came up it triggered her so as you get deeper

759
00:47:08.960 --> 00:47:14.800
in relationships like as towards like looking at things things can come up well actually they will

760
00:47:14.800 --> 00:47:20.080
come up but you have to have a like where you can the the whole point is like when they come up

761
00:47:20.080 --> 00:47:24.400
you work through it and we have out the gate i was like hey anything that comes up i'd like to

762
00:47:24.400 --> 00:47:32.480
work through it we had that out the gate literally and she didn't honor that but so to say that yes

763
00:47:32.480 --> 00:47:38.960
she needed heartwork she'd done a ton of heartwork but she didn't i don't think she recognized that

764
00:47:39.840 --> 00:47:47.360
what i was touching on was a wound see triggers are like if you trigger somebody it's not your

765
00:47:47.360 --> 00:47:53.840
fault right like it's their job to handle their triggers you can be you can be helpful in that

766
00:47:53.840 --> 00:48:00.640
you can help them with it you can help them show that but she bounced because she you know and

767
00:48:00.640 --> 00:48:07.280
and i didn't want to dance and i um so it gave her the opportunity and i'm saying you guys are

768
00:48:07.280 --> 00:48:12.000
going to have stuff come up where you're going to be like whoa time out triggered right it's not it's

769
00:48:12.000 --> 00:48:18.720
the wrong person it's just that they've gotten so close that something in you is going uh-oh

770
00:48:19.600 --> 00:48:25.360
and now you have a chance to work through it and process and do the hard work on why am i triggered

771
00:48:25.360 --> 00:48:31.360
why am i wanting to bolt is this is this legitimate i mean could be completely legitimate

772
00:48:31.360 --> 00:48:36.880
right like if there's something that's fully legitimate it's a red flag then run but if it's

773
00:48:36.880 --> 00:48:44.560
a phantom in your head because of problems with your mom or a female some female in your life or

774
00:48:44.560 --> 00:48:50.720
a spouse like it doesn't have to be a romantic relationship to screw up the focus of a woman

775
00:48:50.720 --> 00:48:57.040
like a female focus in your life um it's usually what it is but like but my am i making sense

776
00:48:57.040 --> 00:49:01.120
like as they get closer you're going to be more likely to have areas that you're not

777
00:49:02.080 --> 00:49:08.960
that aren't really you normally accessible come up and be accessible so then you can get deeper

778
00:49:08.960 --> 00:49:15.840
healing in that if you see him as that um if you see him as a dead red flag and i have to run

779
00:49:15.840 --> 00:49:23.200
then you actually she actually lost in this she had a great opportunity to be like hey you know

780
00:49:23.280 --> 00:49:31.280
mike i am so sorry i got when you said you were a seven and i just i i was projecting you to be

781
00:49:31.280 --> 00:49:37.600
just like my ex i got some inner healing that i need to do i'm sorry i would have been hey you

782
00:49:37.600 --> 00:49:44.320
know what i support that and i i i i'll help you in any way possible but i'm not that dude

783
00:49:45.200 --> 00:49:49.920
and actually i am probably the solution that the lord's bring in your life because faithful

784
00:49:50.240 --> 00:49:57.760
well that so you might need it like sevens are so fun guys but like man you just if you're like

785
00:49:57.760 --> 00:49:58.720
if you're the kind of

786
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:02.000
I need somebody who's like a planner.

787
00:50:02.000 --> 00:50:07.000
Like somebody who's really good with details and stuff.

788
00:50:07.000 --> 00:50:10.000
Because that is not my strength.

789
00:50:10.000 --> 00:50:14.000
But if you want to have a company or a coach,

790
00:50:14.000 --> 00:50:17.000
that stuff, I can crush that stuff.

791
00:50:17.000 --> 00:50:20.000
Complimentary opposites.

792
00:50:20.000 --> 00:50:22.000
If you have two sevens, it would be a blast,

793
00:50:22.000 --> 00:50:24.000
but nothing would ever get handled.

794
00:50:24.000 --> 00:50:27.000
So having somebody who's your same type

795
00:50:27.000 --> 00:50:30.000
really isn't, I mean, it's kind of probably

796
00:50:30.000 --> 00:50:32.000
going to be boring for you.

797
00:50:32.000 --> 00:50:34.000
Having somebody who's a complimentary opposite is better.

798
00:50:34.000 --> 00:50:36.000
But my whole point was, you guys,

799
00:50:36.000 --> 00:50:38.000
the whole point I wanted to bring up in this is

800
00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:41.000
look at your strengths and own them.

801
00:50:41.000 --> 00:50:44.000
If you have a place where you're not confident,

802
00:50:44.000 --> 00:50:46.000
shore it up.

803
00:50:46.000 --> 00:50:48.000
And like Christopher, I love, like you're talking,

804
00:50:48.000 --> 00:50:50.000
hey, you know what, my job has actually really

805
00:50:50.000 --> 00:50:52.000
helped me be able to talk to people.

806
00:50:52.000 --> 00:50:54.000
Just go start talking to people.

807
00:50:54.000 --> 00:50:57.000
If you're afraid to introduce yourself to women,

808
00:50:57.000 --> 00:51:00.000
just go talk to people at the store.

809
00:51:00.000 --> 00:51:02.000
Get used to interacting with that,

810
00:51:02.000 --> 00:51:05.000
having that awkward thing, and then graduate.

811
00:51:05.000 --> 00:51:07.000
Am I making sense to you all?

812
00:51:07.000 --> 00:51:09.000
Like, I really want you to win.

813
00:51:09.000 --> 00:51:11.000
I really want you to feel confident when you're

814
00:51:11.000 --> 00:51:14.000
walking into things.

815
00:51:14.000 --> 00:51:15.000
Hey, Mr. Hunter.

816
00:51:15.000 --> 00:51:16.000
Sorry I'm late.

817
00:51:16.000 --> 00:51:18.000
That's all right.

818
00:51:18.000 --> 00:51:19.000
So we're just talking about, Hunter,

819
00:51:19.000 --> 00:51:22.000
we're just talking about, hey, look at what things

820
00:51:22.000 --> 00:51:24.000
you can do in your life already, like your strengths,

821
00:51:24.000 --> 00:51:26.000
but also like what you can bring in.

822
00:51:26.000 --> 00:51:28.000
Like, if you have the potential to where you can

823
00:51:28.000 --> 00:51:31.000
get healthy and get jacked, do it.

824
00:51:31.000 --> 00:51:32.000
Have fun.

825
00:51:32.000 --> 00:51:33.000
Jiu-jitsu.

826
00:51:33.000 --> 00:51:34.000
Jiu-jitsu.

827
00:51:34.000 --> 00:51:35.000
See, there you go.

828
00:51:35.000 --> 00:51:37.000
I'm already going to compete in three weeks.

829
00:51:37.000 --> 00:51:40.000
And of course, I already told some women at shirts

830
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:41.000
that they like it.

831
00:51:41.000 --> 00:51:42.000
They even like the cauliflower.

832
00:51:42.000 --> 00:51:45.000
I don't know if they even like the cauliflower.

833
00:51:45.000 --> 00:51:47.000
That's why I haven't done jiu-jitsu, bro.

834
00:51:47.000 --> 00:51:48.000
That's why.

835
00:51:48.000 --> 00:51:51.000
The cauliflower here is the one reason why I haven't

836
00:51:51.000 --> 00:51:54.000
done it, even though I wanted to so bad.

837
00:51:54.000 --> 00:51:58.000
But even then, you guys, look, Hunter is like, hey,

838
00:51:58.000 --> 00:51:59.000
I do jiu-jitsu.

839
00:51:59.000 --> 00:52:02.000
And every lady is going to be like, what?

840
00:52:02.000 --> 00:52:04.000
Interest point, talk point.

841
00:52:04.000 --> 00:52:07.000
Like, find something to talk about.

842
00:52:07.000 --> 00:52:10.000
Like, become interesting.

843
00:52:10.000 --> 00:52:11.000
All right.

844
00:52:11.000 --> 00:52:12.000
Another thing.

845
00:52:12.000 --> 00:52:15.000
About my self-gratification, did I tell you?

846
00:52:15.000 --> 00:52:20.000
I went 15 straight days in a row without any self-gratification.

847
00:52:21.000 --> 00:52:22.000
It's the biggest struggle.

848
00:52:22.000 --> 00:52:25.000
I was never able to do this in 15 hours.

849
00:52:25.000 --> 00:52:26.000
Make it the rest of your life, dude.

850
00:52:26.000 --> 00:52:27.000
Keep it up.

851
00:52:27.000 --> 00:52:28.000
Way to go.

852
00:52:28.000 --> 00:52:29.000
Hey, Hunter, five's up.

853
00:52:29.000 --> 00:52:30.000
All right.

854
00:52:30.000 --> 00:52:36.000
But so, you guys, you know, what are the qualities of things

855
00:52:36.000 --> 00:52:40.000
that you can attach in your lives that are going to bring

856
00:52:40.000 --> 00:52:41.000
your best self around?

857
00:52:41.000 --> 00:52:43.000
Like, 90 days.

858
00:52:43.000 --> 00:52:44.000
30 days.

859
00:52:44.000 --> 00:52:45.000
One week.

860
00:52:45.000 --> 00:52:49.000
I mean, if 90 days seems too long, do it for a week, right?

861
00:52:49.000 --> 00:52:50.000
And then do it for two weeks.

862
00:52:50.000 --> 00:52:52.000
Like, Hunter, you're stretching it out, right?

863
00:52:52.000 --> 00:52:56.000
But just, hey, I'm going to, you know what?

864
00:52:56.000 --> 00:52:57.000
I'm going to eat better.

865
00:52:57.000 --> 00:52:58.000
You know what?

866
00:52:58.000 --> 00:53:03.000
But you guys, do something that actually, I'm not ever going to tell you,

867
00:53:03.000 --> 00:53:05.000
don't ever do a diet.

868
00:53:05.000 --> 00:53:08.000
Do a lifestyle change that you eat better.

869
00:53:08.000 --> 00:53:11.000
Diets are fads, and then you, like, you drop weight,

870
00:53:11.000 --> 00:53:15.000
and then you gain it all back right after because you've done something

871
00:53:15.000 --> 00:53:17.000
that you didn't want to do.

872
00:53:17.000 --> 00:53:22.000
If you want to, if you want to, you don't like cardio,

873
00:53:22.000 --> 00:53:24.000
do weight training.

874
00:53:24.000 --> 00:53:25.000
Or do a walk.

875
00:53:25.000 --> 00:53:26.000
Go to the Redwoods.

876
00:53:26.000 --> 00:53:28.000
Do push-ups every morning.

877
00:53:28.000 --> 00:53:31.000
But do something, right?

878
00:53:31.000 --> 00:53:34.000
Do something different and maximize who you are.

879
00:53:34.000 --> 00:53:36.000
Be yourself.

880
00:53:36.000 --> 00:53:39.000
Like, David, I can't, like, dude, you're such a great dude,

881
00:53:39.000 --> 00:53:41.000
and you're so brilliant.

882
00:53:41.000 --> 00:53:46.000
Like, just start having conversations with people and work on just

883
00:53:46.000 --> 00:53:48.000
having a fun conversation.

884
00:53:48.000 --> 00:53:50.000
I love having conversations with people.

885
00:53:50.000 --> 00:53:53.000
Like, you know, like I say, if you're afraid to ask women out,

886
00:53:53.000 --> 00:53:57.000
just start talking to random people at your grocery store,

887
00:53:57.000 --> 00:54:00.000
at the gas station, in the gym, at work.

888
00:54:00.000 --> 00:54:02.000
Just start having convos.

889
00:54:02.000 --> 00:54:04.000
And then when you get comfortable with that,

890
00:54:04.000 --> 00:54:08.000
it's going to be less intimidating to walk up to a gal, right?

891
00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:12.000
Realize, you know, like the gals on that group on Friday night,

892
00:54:12.000 --> 00:54:15.000
they all were looking to be asked out.

893
00:54:15.000 --> 00:54:18.000
There wasn't one of them that, like, and so, like, yeah,

894
00:54:18.000 --> 00:54:23.000
you have some that are pompous and, like, that's what you, I mean,

895
00:54:23.000 --> 00:54:25.000
dude, that's the great, you'll find that out right away.

896
00:54:25.000 --> 00:54:28.000
You're like, okay, nope, didn't lose nothing there.

897
00:54:28.000 --> 00:54:30.000
Like, I don't care how smoking she is.

898
00:54:30.000 --> 00:54:33.000
Like, if she's putting smoking holes in you and, like, she doesn't,

899
00:54:33.000 --> 00:54:36.000
she's not kind and beautiful on the inside.

900
00:54:36.000 --> 00:54:40.000
I have met a lot of really ugly, beautiful women, if that makes sense.

901
00:54:40.000 --> 00:54:43.000
Like, you know, their outsides were phenomenal,

902
00:54:43.000 --> 00:54:46.000
and they were all dolled up, but their insides were ugly as sin.

903
00:54:46.000 --> 00:54:51.000
And I've met some, like Eva, the gal I hung out with Friday night,

904
00:54:51.000 --> 00:54:54.000
one of the most beautiful women I've ever met, like, outside and in.

905
00:54:54.000 --> 00:54:56.000
She was just so cool.

906
00:54:56.000 --> 00:54:58.000
And we jelled. We had fun. We had a good vibe.

907
00:54:58.000 --> 00:54:59.000
Like, we danced.

908
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:05.280
I haven't danced in 20 years, and I dance for 6 hours.

909
00:55:05.280 --> 00:55:09.520
I was sitting there, I told her I don't dance, and she's like,

910
00:55:09.520 --> 00:55:11.040
yeah, yeah, right, you don't dance.

911
00:55:11.040 --> 00:55:14.960
I'm like, I don't even know what I'm doing.

912
00:55:14.960 --> 00:55:17.360
I didn't even know what I was doing, and I had a blast.

913
00:55:17.360 --> 00:55:18.760
I had so much fun.

914
00:55:18.760 --> 00:55:22.760
Go have fun and joy, because when you're having fun,

915
00:55:22.760 --> 00:55:23.960
you have joy.

916
00:55:23.960 --> 00:55:27.200
Be funny, and if they don't laugh at your jokes, who cares?

917
00:55:27.200 --> 00:55:30.120
You laughed at yourself.

918
00:55:30.120 --> 00:55:34.080
You don't need somebody else, but just go and have some fun.

919
00:55:34.080 --> 00:55:36.880
Take some reps, take some swings, take some shots.

920
00:55:36.880 --> 00:55:38.720
Man, you guys are all amazing.

921
00:55:38.720 --> 00:55:44.640
And with Jess and I, there's some hard work things

922
00:55:44.640 --> 00:55:45.320
that came up.

923
00:55:45.320 --> 00:55:47.560
And as you go deeper in relationships,

924
00:55:47.560 --> 00:55:51.240
deeper hard work things will come up, or can.

925
00:55:51.240 --> 00:55:52.720
It's great, actually.

926
00:55:52.720 --> 00:55:56.200
You want that stuff to come up, because you definitely

927
00:55:56.200 --> 00:56:00.120
don't want to come up after you get married.

928
00:56:00.120 --> 00:56:01.480
But it's much easier.

929
00:56:01.480 --> 00:56:02.440
Modern dating sucks.

930
00:56:02.440 --> 00:56:04.080
They go, Hunter, bring it on.

931
00:56:04.080 --> 00:56:06.840
I joined a book club, figuring I could get a little help

932
00:56:06.840 --> 00:56:08.240
before going on those apps.

933
00:56:08.240 --> 00:56:09.360
Cool.

934
00:56:09.360 --> 00:56:11.480
And like, yeah, and apps.

935
00:56:11.480 --> 00:56:13.480
If you hate apps, just try one.

936
00:56:13.480 --> 00:56:15.320
Just do something, right?

937
00:56:15.320 --> 00:56:18.280
I mean, in 90 days, are you going to be?

938
00:56:18.280 --> 00:56:20.480
I don't want any of you guys to be in the same place

939
00:56:20.480 --> 00:56:21.040
you are now.

940
00:56:21.040 --> 00:56:23.240
In a week, I don't want you to be in the same place.

941
00:56:23.240 --> 00:56:26.040
And if you need help, you guys, we

942
00:56:26.040 --> 00:56:28.240
have these calls, and I will do anything

943
00:56:28.240 --> 00:56:29.280
I can to help you guys.

944
00:56:29.280 --> 00:56:31.040
I even share all my crap that I don't even

945
00:56:31.040 --> 00:56:32.840
want to talk about, because I think

946
00:56:32.840 --> 00:56:34.360
it'll be helpful to you.

947
00:56:34.360 --> 00:56:36.760
And so as you get deeper in relationships,

948
00:56:36.760 --> 00:56:38.800
you're like, oh my gosh, this thing's coming up.

949
00:56:38.800 --> 00:56:40.360
Man, this is not a good relationship.

950
00:56:40.360 --> 00:56:42.120
No, it's actually a great relationship,

951
00:56:42.120 --> 00:56:44.320
because it's bringing up stuff that you need to work on.

952
00:56:44.320 --> 00:56:45.440
And you work through that.

953
00:56:45.440 --> 00:56:47.720
If you guys can work through that, dude, you're great.

954
00:56:47.720 --> 00:56:51.040
You're doing great.

955
00:56:51.040 --> 00:56:53.280
You know, conflict or issues coming up

956
00:56:53.280 --> 00:56:54.840
isn't a bad relationship.

957
00:56:55.680 --> 00:56:58.400
Relationships where things don't come up

958
00:56:58.400 --> 00:57:00.040
aren't usually great relationships,

959
00:57:00.040 --> 00:57:01.200
because you're not.

960
00:57:01.200 --> 00:57:03.700
Like a good relationship, you're going to trigger each other.

961
00:57:03.700 --> 00:57:04.800
I mean, it just is.

962
00:57:04.800 --> 00:57:06.240
It's just one of those things.

963
00:57:06.240 --> 00:57:07.960
And can you work through the conflict?

964
00:57:07.960 --> 00:57:11.040
Can you be testy and repair?

965
00:57:11.040 --> 00:57:13.320
And that's a whole other side.

966
00:57:13.320 --> 00:57:16.760
But communication, learn how to get confident.

967
00:57:16.760 --> 00:57:19.000
If you're not confident asking a woman out,

968
00:57:19.000 --> 00:57:20.240
just start talking to people.

969
00:57:20.240 --> 00:57:24.360
And then ask a neighbor out on a date, on a, hey,

970
00:57:24.360 --> 00:57:31.160
can we go get whatever you think would help you.

971
00:57:31.160 --> 00:57:36.880
And don't, if you're in a season where your bandwidth is low,

972
00:57:36.880 --> 00:57:39.880
just pick one thing to love yourself better.

973
00:57:39.880 --> 00:57:41.520
Neighbor, yeah, right?

974
00:57:41.520 --> 00:57:43.000
Like, dude, take a neighbor out.

975
00:57:43.000 --> 00:57:47.800
Like, you guys, I've taken 70-year-old women out.

976
00:57:47.800 --> 00:57:50.680
I've taken 20-year-old women out, 18, 15.

977
00:57:50.680 --> 00:57:52.400
Like, oh, they're friends.

978
00:57:52.400 --> 00:57:56.760
And so be the bar, right?

979
00:57:56.760 --> 00:57:58.080
Dude, they would love it.

980
00:57:58.080 --> 00:58:00.640
Like, go out and just have some fun.

981
00:58:00.640 --> 00:58:02.160
Yes.

982
00:58:02.160 --> 00:58:02.660
Right?

983
00:58:02.660 --> 00:58:03.640
I had to say at work.

984
00:58:03.640 --> 00:58:05.920
But like, Blake, like, your neighbors are all retired.

985
00:58:05.920 --> 00:58:09.080
Like, I took, I have a lot of retired people in my life,

986
00:58:09.080 --> 00:58:14.440
lady, like, and widowers, like widows, or widows.

987
00:58:14.440 --> 00:58:15.440
Yeah, widowers are guys.

988
00:58:15.440 --> 00:58:17.280
Sorry, I didn't get the right.

989
00:58:17.280 --> 00:58:19.240
But like, I took her out for a break.

990
00:58:19.240 --> 00:58:21.680
And don't take me out, thanks.

991
00:58:21.720 --> 00:58:24.960
But like, you know, one of the things, I'm a dad, right?

992
00:58:24.960 --> 00:58:27.520
You know, like, and so, and that Friday night,

993
00:58:27.520 --> 00:58:31.640
I so wanted to put clothes on 300 women.

994
00:58:31.640 --> 00:58:33.440
I was just like, come on, you guys.

995
00:58:33.440 --> 00:58:36.320
You cannot come, you came out of the house in that?

996
00:58:36.320 --> 00:58:39.480
I was like, there's more, anyways,

997
00:58:39.480 --> 00:58:42.720
there's more material on a teabag

998
00:58:42.720 --> 00:58:43.840
than there is in your dress.

999
00:58:43.840 --> 00:58:47.520
So like, but like, it's like,

1000
00:58:47.520 --> 00:58:48.840
so I was in full dad mode,

1001
00:58:48.840 --> 00:58:50.640
and I was trying not to be dad mode.

1002
00:58:52.040 --> 00:58:55.840
Yeah, but, and I'm sorry, Christopher,

1003
00:58:55.840 --> 00:58:58.200
if I've, if I touched anything on that.

1004
00:58:58.200 --> 00:58:59.360
But I was like, my, like,

1005
00:58:59.360 --> 00:59:01.800
I talk about 70-year-old senior citizen

1006
00:59:01.800 --> 00:59:03.320
whose husband's passed away.

1007
00:59:04.640 --> 00:59:08.120
Like, okay, I was like, but took her out.

1008
00:59:08.120 --> 00:59:12.720
Like, one of the gals at church, she's like 22.

1009
00:59:12.720 --> 00:59:15.240
I knew she'd had some rough relationships.

1010
00:59:15.240 --> 00:59:17.440
And I'm like, hey, can we just go out and have fun?

1011
00:59:17.440 --> 00:59:20.760
And I told her, taught her what chivalry looked like.

1012
00:59:20.760 --> 00:59:24.840
This is what you should experience from a good dude.

1013
00:59:24.840 --> 00:59:27.560
And I reset her bar because she was chasing,

1014
00:59:27.560 --> 00:59:29.520
she was accepting far too low.

1015
00:59:29.520 --> 00:59:31.440
And you guys, gentlemen here,

1016
00:59:31.440 --> 00:59:33.640
my, I mean, I will help you guys,

1017
00:59:33.640 --> 00:59:37.400
but my ask for you is that everybody you date

1018
00:59:37.400 --> 00:59:40.160
is somebody else's future spouse.

1019
00:59:40.160 --> 00:59:42.440
And that it could be yours, it could be somebody else's,

1020
00:59:42.440 --> 00:59:44.400
but that you would lead with honor,

1021
00:59:44.400 --> 00:59:46.560
and you would lead them better off than they are.

1022
00:59:46.560 --> 00:59:48.840
And you, and like, so I do a lot of things

1023
00:59:48.840 --> 00:59:52.760
just to go have some fun, but also to show,

1024
00:59:52.760 --> 00:59:54.000
you know, it's amazing how many ladies

1025
00:59:54.000 --> 00:59:57.520
do not know how to wait for a door to be opened.

1026
00:59:58.560 --> 00:59:59.800
And so I'd be like.

1027
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:04.480
She'd be like, what? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm like, it's okay. You've never been trained.

1028
01:00:04.480 --> 01:00:08.760
I'm like, I'm like, if you do it right there, I have to literally go through you to get

1029
01:00:08.760 --> 01:00:12.120
to the door. Can you just scooch to the side a little bit? And she's like, okay. I was

1030
01:00:12.120 --> 01:00:18.520
like, come up to the chair and pause. And she's like, really? Why? I was like, okay.

1031
01:00:18.520 --> 01:00:25.920
But like, but you guys, most women don't know what chivalry is. Teach them. Right. And so,

1032
01:00:25.920 --> 01:00:31.640
but like, whatever, if, if, if taking out a neighbor, taking out somebody, I took out

1033
01:00:31.640 --> 01:00:40.560
my niece, you know, I've taken out my niece. Um, and like, if that helps you, I, now I'm

1034
01:00:40.560 --> 01:00:45.520
not doing that because I'm just going, Hey, let's go get coffee. Right. You know, let's

1035
01:00:45.520 --> 01:00:52.760
go have some fun. So any questions, blasphemy, you know, any critiques, you can, you can,

1036
01:00:52.760 --> 01:00:56.520
you can laugh at my pain. That's fine too. But like, but I love y'all and I want y'all

1037
01:00:56.520 --> 01:01:04.000
to win, you know, I hope you understand that. Can I do the same practice this on coworkers?

1038
01:01:04.000 --> 01:01:09.080
You know, Hunter coworkers, because you're like, that's kind of complicated because you

1039
01:01:09.080 --> 01:01:14.340
guys are like always in proximity, like a neighbor. And, and, you know, um, you really

1040
01:01:14.340 --> 01:01:22.060
have to, I would prefer somebody not that you're working with because then there's also

1041
01:01:22.060 --> 01:01:26.420
the sexual harassment stuff that you don't ever, I know you would never intend that,

1042
01:01:26.420 --> 01:01:32.620
but some of that stuff gets, but it's, I mean, I've, I've seen some pretty insane things

1043
01:01:32.620 --> 01:01:38.380
in that, that were never, there was never any intent, but people don't always receive

1044
01:01:38.380 --> 01:01:43.620
you the way that you intend or, um, I mean, there's downright awful things, but then there's

1045
01:01:43.620 --> 01:01:48.380
ones where I've seen it both ways. Um, so I would, I would say coworkers are probably

1046
01:01:49.380 --> 01:01:53.980
I would even want to date coworkers because of that. Right. Because it can get you in

1047
01:01:53.980 --> 01:01:59.540
a lot of trouble with HR. Um, but you know, you guys are, you guys are amazing. I'm proud

1048
01:01:59.540 --> 01:02:03.100
of you doing the hard work. Hard work's a lifetime thing. Like, you know, I mean, and

1049
01:02:03.100 --> 01:02:08.140
Justin, you just got here, but like I do, I have done like all last week, I, what was

1050
01:02:08.140 --> 01:02:14.380
I doing? Hard work. Why? Because my heart was shattered guys. Right. I was like, dude,

1051
01:02:14.380 --> 01:02:19.340
what the heck? I thought this is good. The one that was going to go, I'm like, man, she,

1052
01:02:19.340 --> 01:02:24.780
I can't get out of her ex's shadow. And that's so disappointing. And so I cried a lot. I

1053
01:02:24.780 --> 01:02:29.300
mean, I was sitting at my, at work sobbing, dude, I'll just be real. I was like, I don't

1054
01:02:29.300 --> 01:02:36.580
care. Like judge me, you know? Uh, I guess it's okay if you, yeah, but lawsuits are not

1055
01:02:36.580 --> 01:02:43.620
super good and you really don't want to be, um, you don't want to be like, I blackballed

1056
01:02:43.660 --> 01:02:50.260
this. Uh, it's not, maybe that is the right term. Like, like if you have a HR thing or

1057
01:02:50.260 --> 01:02:55.340
sexual harassment, even if it wasn't intentional or it wasn't even real. Um, we don't have

1058
01:02:55.340 --> 01:02:59.940
those. We never have those happen at all. I mean, I, I did so much corporate training.

1059
01:02:59.940 --> 01:03:05.300
Maybe I'm a little overly like I did. I did. I went through so many seminars on don't,

1060
01:03:05.300 --> 01:03:09.500
don't even mention something as a, as leadership, you don't do this, this or this or that or

1061
01:03:09.820 --> 01:03:16.380
But, um, but like somebody, um, like I said, I took my niece out. That was a blast, dude.

1062
01:03:16.380 --> 01:03:22.940
And I taught her what a, what it looks like to, um, for a godly band to take out a girl,

1063
01:03:22.940 --> 01:03:28.580
uh, a daughter. Right. Um, and so, but be men of honor, be blessed here. Can I pray

1064
01:03:28.580 --> 01:03:32.380
for you? Can I pray us out? Cause I think we're over time and I'm, I'm sorry guys, I

1065
01:03:32.380 --> 01:03:36.620
overshot, but, um, if there's ever anything that you want to bring up, bring it up, but

1066
01:03:36.620 --> 01:03:40.620
Lord Jesus, I just pray every man on this call and everybody listens to this, that you

1067
01:03:40.620 --> 01:03:45.660
would show them, um, what they can add to their life to be their best selves. Lord,

1068
01:03:45.660 --> 01:03:50.900
would the next 90 days be revolutionary to everybody on this call? Lord, it's been revolutionary

1069
01:03:50.900 --> 01:03:56.060
in my life. And may I not be the same guy in 90 days, or may we all be growing in you

1070
01:03:56.060 --> 01:04:01.940
and to our, to who you've made us to be. Lord, I just pray that, um, each, each, the spirit

1071
01:04:01.940 --> 01:04:05.740
mates you have for each of these guys, that you would also be doing the work in them.

1072
01:04:06.060 --> 01:04:11.500
Lord, I just pray, um, any trigger points, Lord, that you'd be bringing those up before

1073
01:04:11.500 --> 01:04:15.900
they get into the relationship so they can be healed and the heart work get done. But

1074
01:04:15.900 --> 01:04:19.220
Lord, I just pray you would love what's around each one of these guys as a shield, that you

1075
01:04:19.220 --> 01:04:23.140
would encourage their heart. You do break off all hopelessness because hopelessness

1076
01:04:23.140 --> 01:04:28.820
is not from you. It's from the enemy and that, um, discouragement be gone in Jesus name.

1077
01:04:28.820 --> 01:04:32.740
We just speak joy, love, and strength to every one of them. I just bless you all with joy,

1078
01:04:32.740 --> 01:04:36.580
love, and strength. Walk in the fullness. Be the mighty men of valor that you are in

1079
01:04:36.580 --> 01:04:40.020
Jesus name. I pray. Amen. Go guys. Go get it.

1080
01:04:40.020 --> 01:04:42.020
I appreciate you.

1081
01:04:42.020 --> 01:04:44.020
Talk next week.

1082
01:04:44.020 --> 01:04:46.020
Bye.