So, I haven't been able to watch everyone's videos, but I've watched most of your videos,
I believe, and it's been really interesting to hear you guys process.
I appreciate you taking the time to do that.
I know that it requires a level of vulnerability, but I'm even learning in my own process with
the Lord that vulnerability is a gateway to acceleration and transformation.
So, I just appreciate you guys jumping on and doing that.
And I'm going, I'm committing to watching, I want to watch all your videos.
It's not homework for me to watch your videos because I've been enjoying hearing where you
guys are.
And I know Amy specifically said that their who hasn't changed, but their why has changed
or it's developed over time.
We're at a conference right now with a bunch of key entrepreneurs and the theme is for
such a time as this.
And I'm reminded again of how seriously the Lord takes timing and seasons.
It's not, we know nothing's coincidence, but I think sometimes we don't realize the
season that we're in.
And so, things like the prophetic and community and things like that help us create a deeper
awareness of like, oh, this is my season and this is now.
So, we are going to process a little bit the process today.
We're going to talk more about the why and we're going to talk about the what as well.
Okay.
So, we have the why, but what, and not just, you know, because there's a lot of good ideas,
but what does the Lord have for me now in partnering with bringing this breakthrough
to my who?
And that's what we're going to be processing the rest of the week as well.
So, okay.
I don't want to jump into it until we're streaming in case people are joining on Facebook and
they're unable to join us on Zoom, but let me hear some shares a little bit.
If you guys don't mind, because I feel like what I, from the videos that I did watch,
there was like some surprises like, oh, this wasn't, you know, I thought I was clear on
this.
And then the Lord brought deeper clarity.
And I just want to hear about like, what was it like?
Did you have to go layers with the Lord of like, but why, but why, but why?
What was that conversation like?
Can anyone share, willing to share?
Hey, Amy, I see you.
You know, I'm always willing to share.
For me, I mean, I think I asked the question up front, I was like, okay, we're going seven
level, you know, and, but there was already so much going on that, honestly, I saw those
levels in retrospect, really unfold over a week's time.
And so, which was a surprise for me to, like, not have to, like, gear through it, you know,
like, but why, but why?
I feel like he just kind of like, went down and, you know, and this is really the, probably
the coolest thing for me is, I honestly feel like I fully stepped in to my identity, embrace
my identity for the first time.
I mean, like, in like, God had given me a name for myself.
Like, I was like, how, how do you know me in heaven?
Like, what, what is my seat next to you, Jesus say?
And I don't know if I've shared this in this group, but he's, and immediately, it just
came and it was beloved daughter of God, whose heart and mind are at rest, let her rejoice
in who I am.
And I know that's how I'm known in heaven.
And so, this is just really cool, because I've referenced a period of time 26 years
ago where the Lord was giving me prophetic dreams and visions.
There was a lot going on in, in our lives and in our family.
And he was aligning us and, you know, so much has unfolded since then.
But I know that he was prophesying for now.
Yeah.
And he gave me a dream and I've gotten layers of meaning, well, it was a dream and a vision,
both and in the night and my spirit understood it.
That's all I need to say when I try to describe this dream.
But what I saw, I had a nightmare and I, I was panicked in the nightmare at what was
going on.
It was something I was having to stand by and watch and I could do nothing about.
And I woke up.
Until then, as I was going back to sleep.
I saw a vision and I saw this like a stone wheel and it was, it was spinning like counterclockwise
and it was coming into the field of, you know, it was like right there in front of me.
And I panicked in the same way I had when I was powerless to do anything about what
was, you know, what the dream was about.
And then from behind, I saw another wheel and it came and it bypassed the first one.
It was spinning in the opposite direction.
And my, I said this because I understood it, Lord, you were there all along.
And then he spoke to me, maybe the clearest I've ever heard him speak, he said, your rest
has now begun.
And I think I've, I've mentioned this and he said, I'm going to lead you there through
your husband.
Cause I had a lot to learn about God's order and, you know, getting underneath that.
And my husband speaks that over me all the time.
He was like, you know, he, it's, it's important to him that I walk in rest.
And I feel like I stepped into that anointing last week.
I mean, like the Lord just brought me there and he, when he took me back, it was like
these fears that were deep seated.
I didn't even know where they were coming from, but anyway, he marked it with a heart.
Like each little scar coming up from the time I was three up until way into my adult life.
And I think it's, there is a little three-year-old in a lot of people that share the same underlying
fears that I did.
And I love them.
I love my, I love my who, but I understand my why.
I mean, I understand in my spirit.
And I could see my father there all along as he took me back and held my hand.
It was a lot.
That's huge.
Breakthrough.
I'm so glad.
Thank you, Amy, for sharing.
Cause I did, I did video and I can sense this is guys, this is what I want to talk about
today.
And we'll be talking about every single week that we get together.
It's the external territory and the internal territory.
Okay.
So when we seek out what breakthrough do we want to bring to our who we are going to experience
deeper breakthrough within our own identities and relationship with the Lord, like inevitably
there's no, you can't outgive the Lord, right?
So when you take the time and create the space to seek the Lord on behalf of your, who wait
on the Lord on behalf of your, who, I mean, anyone, not just your specific family members,
there is always a deposit for you in that space from the Lord.
There's always a gift revelation, deeper awareness, deeper experience, deeper understanding, deeper
encounter.
What often happens with ministers of the gospel is we're not, we become so focused on the
output that there's a, we press pause on the internal and we no longer, it's all about
the output.
We no longer come with that expectation that there's also going to be an internal deposit.
And we go beyond ourselves or not aware there's a lot of burnout.
There's a lot of frustration.
There's a lot of forgetting why I'm doing what I'm doing.
Right.
And it becomes about the production, the process or the production, the performance.
And it's no longer about who we're becoming in him, the internal territory we're taking
as sons, as daughters of God.
And it just comes all about the other.
And that's off balance.
That's off balance.
So I really appreciate you for sharing that, Amy.
We're experiencing that in our own lives.
Like no surprise, right?
Like even this week, the Lord's been depositing some things in me, some awareness.
Now here's what's interesting.
Sometimes you get, you come to a level of awareness and it just, you're already changed
because of it.
And you're like, oh, that's, I'm aware now that that's what I'm dealing with.
And it's like, you do step into it and then sometimes you become aware and you have to
say yes to a process, process of healing or being set free.
There's no formula for like which one you're in.
It's just kind of, you know, there's, I don't know if you guys have experienced this, maybe
some of you have like, yeah, there's been times where I just kind of dealt this instant
like weight release because I just became aware of like, oh, that's what I'm dealing
with.
And then other times you're like, oh, this is what the Lord's doing.
I have to step into this process.
I have to like walk through this journey of healing.
playing wholeness, deeper discovery and joint that I feel
like I'm in a little bit of both right now. And I'm sharing this
just because in case anyone else's I feel like it's my
commitment to you is I want to share more of my process not
because I'm like, what, this is the Lindsay show. But if you see
some of yourself in the story, because I'm walking with this
route, I'm asking the Lord why my why I don't know if any of
you guys had this when you were talking with the Lord. I wanted
to talk about the why, but there was so much external noise
happening. That it was like I couldn't like it wasn't about
the why I'm doing posture, the why I'm doing kingdom messengers
it was like, Lord, why am I so tired? Right now? Why am I
having a hard time focusing? Why is this not fun? I feel like
this should be more fun than it is. And that's okay. I want I'm
sharing that because I want to give you guys permission to have
those conversations too. Sometimes we, you know, it's
like we get we're given homework. And we're like, well,
this is what Lindsay said we have to do. And we bypass a lot
of like, what we're actually needing to dig through with the
Lord to just get to the Okay, well, I need to find out the
why. So I had to walk through that too with the Lord this
week. And I realized that I am I'm dealing with a fear of man
still, which is painful to admit, because there's been so
much freedom from that. But there's a deeper level. And
again, going back to timing and seasons with the Lord. I think
in his kindness, he paces us and are in his revealing for
healing. And if he had brought some of this stuff up, like,
let's say four years ago, I think it would have crushed me.
Again, his his yoke is easy, and his burden is light, he's not
going to accelerate in or in a way that breaks my neck, because
we're connected, right? So he he exercises patience, and self
control, and gentleness and kindness so that he can bring
all of this is true for all of you at a pace that you can
handle. And it's not a comparison, like, oh, they're
going faster than me, because we do that too. Oh, it only took
you six months to heal and discover breakthrough. It's been
six years for me. Or I've been living like this for 70 years.
And we start to bring shame and condemnation on ourselves. But
it's not about that. It's about what's happening between you and
the Lord. And there's some things that you're going to
accelerate in that others are going to take a longer process
and vice versa. So I was having to deal with that feeling of
shame. Like I can't believe I'm still terrified of people in
many ways. Because like, I'm the I'm the peace girl. I wear that
banner publicly, right? People come to me and talk to me about
the testimonies of my testimony brought to them. Is this even
real? Is this authentic? Of course it is. Because I'm not
even the same person I was four years ago. But I'm there's
deeper levels to this, there's more territory to take. And when
the Holy Spirit reveals it in his timing, the only acceptable
posture for me to take is to receive what he has for me. And
so I was I'm dealing with this. And so I'm at a conference that
I that I I love being at because this is like, it would be like
being in room with you guys. These are my people. But it was
like a terrifying thought. Because I thought this is going
to be a little bit exhausting to like, connect with so many
people and retired physically, because we've traveled all this
stuff. And I had a mentor recently in love. I don't know
if I've shared this year, in love, just point out. Sometimes
you come across as aloof. And I had to literally look up the
word. Like, I'm like, wait, I think I know what that means.
And that's like cold and unfriendly. I'm like, Oh, my
gosh, like it is someone I trust, right? Like they were
they weren't it wasn't an accusation. So I needed to be
teachable and just weigh the word with the Lord. And I went
to the Lord with it. And like I, it resonates not from a place
of shame or condemnation. But I can see where they're coming
from. And they're pointing this out. Why is that? And Laura
said, you're terrified. You show up in the room with people. And
you feel overstimulated. You feel burdened. You feel like
emotionally responsible for everyone in the room. You feel
like you have to put on the show for people to feel
accepted by you. Meanwhile, you're just trying to be
accepted by them. It's exhausting. Because you walk in
the room and you're strategizing. And so I wanted to
process with the Lord because like part of that shifted me
already, right? Like I'm already changed. Like, okay, there's
some things like when I need to be aware, my body language, my
facial expressions, you know, like, I just need to I need to
be aware that sometimes I come across as a loop. And that can I
can change that. But obviously, there's a deeper root there,
right? I hope it is okay. I'm sharing this with you. Okay, so
I said, because several people even so the these people we were
in the room with in March, and I was hosting the event.
So I was on stage and the comment was made at one point like, oh, I'm an introvert,
which is not a bad thing. But people came up to me afterwards.
You're kind of proud of being an introvert.
I love being an introvert. I love being an introvert. But people were like, oh my gosh,
like, I never knew you were an introvert. It was just made a comparison because our mentor,
who's here, is like straight extrovert. We're like complete opposite. So it was like a fun
thing. So people came up and like, I can't believe you're an introvert. I would have never guessed.
You do all these things on social media. You lead things. You're on stage.
And, you know, I kind of carry like, oh, you know, thank you so much. But I,
I've struggled with that a little bit because, you know, the authenticity thing, like,
it's hard. Like, you know, people are like, oh, it seems so easy for you. And I'm honest with
people. I'm like, yeah, well, it's something I've been practicing, which is true. It's a creative
rep. All the things I share with you guys, right? It's a creative rep I built. But I said, Lord,
I need, I need some articulation. I need some understanding because it's starting to feel
draining again. Like, I feel like I'm back to a place where I'm like, I'm struggling. I'm tired.
This is not life-giving anymore. They said, Lindsay, you have a high pain threshold.
So for a long time, because this has been something that I've carried like way back
when, when I was like preaching on Sundays, Bruce can attest, like there would be Sunday,
like I would be, um, you know, asked to preach Sunday, amazing opportunity, but like, I'd be
sick the morning of, cause I'm just like nervous. Right. Like you just have to, but I would still
do it. It's like you high pain threshold, but you were, you were operating out of fear. Yeah.
Your why was fear-based. I'm afraid I'm going to miss out. I'm afraid I'm going to disappoint the
Lord. I'm afraid I'm going to disappoint the leaders I love so much that have given me this
opportunity. You know, I'm afraid, I'm afraid, I'm afraid. So my why was based in fear. There was a
leveling up. There was some breakthrough. My why became, became faith-based. I do this because I
can, I know I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. It might not be easy, but it
is rewarding. And I operated out of faith. I faith so much in, and there was, there was a level of
breakthrough because faith is a kingdom principle, right? So like there is this level of, I can live
by faith. I don't always have to feel it. I don't always have to, you know, think that this is, you
know, but I can give myself to, I can powerfully choose that I can do all things, but it's exhausting.
It's exhausting to faith everything in there's results. You can do it, but is there a better way?
Is there a better way than living by faith? And Lord revealed to me specifically this week,
there is a better way. There's a higher level. And he said, Lindsay, now you're going to learn
how to do this by love. You're going to learn to be fueled, not by your love for me,
not by your love for other people or your who you're going to be fueled by my love for you.
You're going to come to an understanding and a belief that I am so unconditionally delighted in
you. And that is good. That's what's going to fuel you. And what has been hard, what has been
exhausting, what has been draining is going to become life for you because it will be done through
me and by me. So if you're feeling, if you've been feeling the pull either way, like I believe in my
why, this is a beautiful thing. It feels very impactful. It feels very big. It feels like
something the Lord wants me to do, but maybe you felt this resistance of man, I'm, but I'm, I'm,
I'm afraid because there's been, maybe there's been this little pull of, if I can't pull this
off, I'm going to disappoint the Lord, or I'm going to disappoint my mentor, or I'm going to
disappoint myself, or I'm going to miss out. I'm going to miss my destiny. If I don't take action
today, like whatever that is. Right. Or maybe you've gotten to a level where you're like,
I can do this. I can do this, but it, but you're facing it then. Right. Cause there's still this
dynamic of, I know I can do all things, but it's, it's hard and it's exhausting. Right.
I believe there's an even better way. And I think it's the realm of the kingdom. Right.
So I think the fear is kind of that natural realm. And maybe you guys have really high
pain thresholds and you've been able to push through and that's, that's honorable. It really
is because it's because so many people don't even do that. They just quit. They just stay afraid.
They stay in, they stay paralyzed. And then maybe you've gotten to a place, which I think is that
so it's our soul realms, like the medic metaphysical that we kind of, it's the, all
the principles, it's the beautiful principles, right? Like heavenly principles, living by faith
and sowing and reaping and all those things, but it's exhausting because it's.
still sourced by, there's a layer that we can twist if we're not aware of earning, proving,
performing. I don't think Jesus lived by faith. I think he lived by love.
I think faith is part of the process. I'm not saying, I'm not being a heretic,
but when I look back through the life of Jesus and the things he, I mean his intimacy with the
father, that wasn't faith-based. It was love-based. And you look back and you look at Jesus'
commissioning when he was baptized and the father, the dove, the Holy Spirit descends on him and the
father says with a loud voice, this is my son in whom I'm well pleased. That's love.
And it was before Jesus did anything that we would, that we would count as impactful,
you know, results-based in this world.
So that's where we're at. As we discover our why, that's the posture I would love for us to take
and to practice. It is a practice. So like, I'm, I know that I'm stepping into a process.
Like I, I feel changed. Like there's a repentance in me. I don't feel like I'm
changed. Like there's a repentance in me, a change of mind. I'm walking in this direction,
but it's also a process, like a practice of learning to live and operate in life.
There's levels as well.
Yeah.
Like, it just, it, Lord's going to continue to expand, right? Because the kingdom was always
expanding. And so it's like, it's like even the context of, you know, you at a small kind of
local church versus like conference versus like different things, like Lord's like
upgrading your own thinking.
Yeah. So this is, this is why it's important because as we continue to step out and take
more territory externally, like there's a becoming that happens. And the Lord,
I think sometimes we teach like the Lord's never going to give you more than you can handle,
right? I get, I, I get that. And I, again, I, I agree to it for an extent, but what that doesn't
mean is that you're not going to have opportunities at times that are bigger than where you are
today and your understanding and your revelation. So I think we've all stepped into something
bigger that feels bigger than us. But again, remember our starting place is fullness.
So we're already there. We're already seated in heavenly places. There's a fullness, right?
But there's a, a growth that happens in our impact and our influence. And I'm not just
talking about numbers. I'm talking about in the spiritual realm, like a science, I think
like in unlocking creation from frustration that we step into as we become, as we become
more aware, discover more. And so like, for me in many ways, the things that used to
terrify me as far as like, you know, like, okay, so guys, this is really interesting. And I,
I probably shouldn't share this with you because I, it's like, it kind of negates like what we,
well, it doesn't, it doesn't. So you guys know my journey, daily hustle content, daily long form
content for like a year, right? So seeds were sown. So that's like the disclaimer of what I'm
about to share with you. So for the last eight weeks, you obviously have been posting daily,
even more than that, like our shorts and stuff. And then we had a situation where the person
that was posting for me posted something that was not theologically correct.
To be fair, because we love this person.
They still work for us. And it's not to merit. It's the guy that I, it's the guy that you guys
already know he is. And he's awesome. And he loves Jesus and everything. So sound, so mature.
And honestly, like when we pointed it out, he was like, I can't even believe I like posted that.
You want to say what it was? It was public. So he basically posted something with the title that's
Jesus is a good father. I was talking about father God. And he, he was trying to SEO search
and was like, Oh, we need to have the word Jesus as the first word. And he's like, I didn't even
like, think about it. He's like, I posted it too quickly. And anyway, okay, so it happened.
I caught it. I was not impressed. Okay, it was, you were, I wouldn't say not impressed as a little
bit of a doubt. I was Lindsay was not happy. I was not happy. Now part of it is there was,
there was some fear I was, because it guys, it takes a lot, you guys know this, it takes a lot
to show up online. And when you are entrusting your branding and your message to someone,
and I do trust him, obviously like this is one incident out of like the last year of him working,
but I was afraid. Cause I'm like, if somebody, if the wrong,
One person sees this, it wasn't even rational guys.
Like, what are they going to shut me down?
But it was just enough to be like, I can't even believe.
And so it's what we had to do was we realized, okay, we have
outstepped our process a little bit.
We've got to reel it in because we're, we're pushing too hard.
If something like this is happening, right.
So it's fine when there's a mistake made it, you need to reevaluate.
That's all it is.
It's just a, it's a kindness of the Lord in many ways to be like, Hey,
let's come up with some new processes.
Okay.
So, because of that, we have stopped posting daily because we're trying to
figure out what, what can we do to make sure that there are some checks in the
system where I can be a little bit more involved and before things go public.
Right.
Because we had gotten, we were in a temporary process of me, of me, not
really seeing what was going out because yeah, but just, just for the sake of
like, when we will probably talk more about this later, but like, obviously
once you're the channel grows to a certain size, like it's not possible
for Lindsay to be watching every single thing that goes out.
Um, like we have to start trusting team.
Like even when Mara sends out stuff for other things, like if we don't trust
our team, like, and we do, that's why we do check, but we're trying to
figure out like, how do we fix that?
So there's probably a bigger thing there.
There is a bigger thing.
There's bigger conversation.
We're going to be sharing kind of our discussion.
We're still pinpointing some things.
Cause it's like, but I just want to take away the myth that like, Oh my gosh,
you have someone posting for you.
That's amazing.
It's, it's just like a different set of problems.
It's not like all your problems go away.
It's a new process.
So you have to kind of, you have to build around it.
So anyway, so the process, the process for Lindsay had a mini meltdown about it.
Came to terms with a little bit sphere based.
We're learning how to live in love.
There's a lot going on.
Okay.
Here's what's interesting.
Stopped posting consistently, which I'm a big believer in what has
happened to my Instagram channel.
And I forget it's it's grown guys.
Like 50%.
It's 25,000 people, new people, 25,000 new people in the last two weeks.
I'm not posting.
We haven't even posted what is happening.
And so that should be exciting.
And it is, but I realized like the Lord's like lens, I can grow this
thing whenever you want, whenever I want.
But in my kindness, I'm pacing it at your pace.
And that's not something to be ashamed of.
I just want you to be aware that this is a partnership.
This is not all on your shoulders.
This is mine and you're mine.
And what he's revealing to me specifically is like, you have, like
we, you have your safety, your sense of safety, because that's part of it too.
I did not feel safe.
When that mistake happened, I'm like, I am vulnerable to the
elements on the, on the internet.
People are going to call me a heretic, all the things, right.
People are going to call me a heretic anyway, because I don't
always believe what I say, but the Lord said, I am your safe place.
And I know that you know that, but you need to start believing it.
So that's the journey I'm on.
And so I'm sharing that because you might have gone with one
question of why, and you might have come out with answers to questions.
You didn't even know you had in your heart.
Is this resonating with anyone?
Yeah.
Okay.
That's good.
And we found as well, just like as well, like about the difference between the
more, the more we've invested in ourselves, in our own ministry business.
And, um, and the, the kind of the next kind of master's mind or, or anything
that you join, that's like a program or some sort of coaching, the more kind
of the higher up we've gone in those things, the less tactical it is.
Like this mindset stuff is literally all we're talking like that gets talked
about the more, the bigger, the group that you join or the more expensive it
is, it's because this is the stuff that actually holds you back.
It's what you think about yourself.
It's what you think about the Lord.
It's what you think about your identity.
It's that it comes back to those core things.
And, um, that's why we know, like figuring out the execution, figuring
out the technical stuff, figuring out all this stuff that's just like, it's
kind of a known unknown, if that makes sense, like we know there's quick
problems, but what Amy can do or Sydney or Marianne, like these are specific.
Like that what's going to unlock you guys to go to like, to scale beyond
is just how you're thinking about your own ministry, what you, what you think
about how the Lord has called you to do, and you actually believing it
and changing from these mindset shifts.
And so that's what we're excited about in this next couple of months
together is we really want to focus on that mindset stuff more than anything.
Yeah.
Cause there's the width.
And then there's the depth like we've been talking about.
And so this is about the depth.
And so, and it's, again, it's happening in you.
It's also gonna happen with you and your who.
So something I wanna kind of just,
I wanna talk about today
and I wanna hear some feedback on,
and it's okay if you don't,
it's okay if you don't have the perfect answer.
I just wanna hear what you're processing.
Yeah, let's do some discussion.
I wanna do discussion,
because it can't be me just talking at you
the whole time, right?
So as we've talked about our why
and the breakthrough we wanna bring to our who,
there's another question once we kind of land with that
or begin to land with that is,
is what I'm doing on social media
and through my channels bringing that breakthrough?
Is what I'm currently doing
bringing the breakthrough that I wanna bring?
Is it supporting, is my why being supported
with what I'm doing on social media?
Now, for all of us, I don't wanna answer for you,
but I wanna answer for you as like, yes,
what you do on social media
can bring elements of that breakthrough.
If it's not, it could be because maybe what you started out,
it might be a messaging issue, right?
And you're like, I don't feel like it is
because the why that I kind of discovered this week
or the who has changed, that's fine.
What I'm talking about is you showing up in people's screens
is that going to help bring the breakthrough
that you wanna bring?
And if you disagree, like, let me know.
Like, I don't think this is helping at all.
I don't think this will ever help.
I believe there's an element
that yes, this is bringing the breakthrough.
However, is it allowing us to disciple people
in the breakthrough?
Because as we advance wide scale, right?
Growing our tribe, there's now a level of depth.
Not everyone's gonna come with us, right?
So people use this example all the time, right?
Jesus had the crowds, then he had the 70,
then he had the 12, then he had the three.
And I do believe it's like similar.
Why would it be different for us than it was for Jesus
as it comes to his community, who he's pouring into, right?
So there's, it's okay.
It's okay.
Like the 70,000 on Instagram have not come
into the Kingdom Messenger community.
And the 1,500 in the Kingdom Messenger community
have not come into the membership.
And oh, have you guys noticed
that after the 12 month membership,
not everyone came with us to advancement?
Right.
That's okay.
It's not that they were wrong.
They were wrong.
Right?
So it's because we gave everyone the, we hope,
we gave everyone the dignity and the permission
to make a choice for themselves, right?
We don't wanna make that choice for them.
But you can see, even within our own,
we brought it in, we brought it in, we brought it in
so that there can be deeper and deeper levels
of discipleship connection.
The things that I'm sharing with you,
I'm not getting up and sharing with 70,000.
That's wisdom.
Also, they haven't asked for that,
nor invested to have that, right?
So let's not, and I'm gonna say this obviously with grace,
let's not cast our pearls before swine.
This is where a lot of people can get mixed up
because they go out there
and they share the depths of their soul on Facebook.
And then three people like it and no one comments
and it crushes them.
And it was like, hey, that wasn't for the masses.
That treasure within you wasn't for the masses.
So all of you, there is something,
I believe, deeper than just the channels.
Again, the channels are the net, it helps us gather.
I have been caught in people's net,
like Pedro, my mentor, we're here now.
I'm so grateful because Facebook ads, right?
But there's deeper levels, he didn't just stop there.
And so what I wanna kind of talk about today
is are any of you sensing there's deeper levels
to you serving your who,
beyond just getting up and doing short-form content
or even long-form podcast content on social media?
You guys can unmute yourself.
Feedback, questions, anything?
Is this helping?
Answer?
Yeah.
Okay.
So for me, that's a question
I've been talking to the Lord about.
I know right now I'm kind of broad,
just delivering God-mail messages.
So it's kind of broad, kind of hitting lots of people,
but I'm like, okay, Lord, how do I go in deeper?
You know what I mean?
Because we all have testimonies,
as you've mentioned before, Lindsay,
and this freedom.
that that can happen. And I believe the Lord is going to specifically drill me down, you
know, to women and I'm trying, I'm trying to sit with him to know like the age range
and the different things so I can know how to connect. But to share my testimony, and
to not only share my testimony, but show them how I became free, and how you can stay free,
you know, so this is so good that you're talking about this, Lindsay, because it's something
that it's been in my heart. Like I like I said, I know that I'm delivering God now but
I'm like, Okay, Lord, I think you're about to drill this down deeper. And how can I partner
with you? And I'm glad that you talked about, you know, just sharing your heart and sharing
your you know, your soul, you know, like everything that's within you, you know, because y'all
kind of know me a little bit, I could be like an open book, right. And so it's like
just having that wisdom of knowing, you know, how much is too much. And, and this is just
for my those core women that the Lord is going to assign to me to help them, you know, to
receive breakthrough in love and knowing what love truly means, etc, and how to stay free.
So I'm on a process of asking the Lord, that's where I am currently, because right now I'm
like, I know I'm broad with the God male. But God, I think you're about to zone it in
because you have some women on your on your heart that you want to, to make free. So thank
you for this conversation. Okay, I'm going to ask you a follow up question. Yes. What
would you want it to look like?
I would want it to look like a community where women can come look, they literally come in
one way. And they leave, well, I don't necessarily want to say leave a different way. But when
they joined the community, it's like they are, they turn into a butterfly. Like, you
know, they are transformed in their thinking, and they're making better decisions. So it's
not just they have this head knowledge, but the women are making better decisions about
who they allow romantically into their life. You know what I mean? Making better choices
in those areas where they're not staying trapped in negative cycles, because they keep
making wrong choices on what love means or what love looks like. So it would be a want
the woman that joins my community will will be healed, she will be made whole. And it'll
actually play out in her life where she will now make, you know, she'll allow God to help
her to make choices. So like a community of women that are growing together, that are
whole that can, like, I want it to be a ripple effect. So now that woman who's joined my
community is now sharing with other women, you know, and it just keeps going on and on.
So hopefully.
So you said some things. So you want it to be live interaction with you? Yes. Yeah. So
it's, of course, now. Yes. Yeah. Yes. I see that. Not just a social media channel. Right.
So you want some interaction mentoring with you? Yes. Action on a regular basis.
I don't know. I don't know. I guess so. I don't know. No. If you didn't know, what would
the answer be? Um, yeah, I would say on a on a regular well, like we can meet monthly.
I'm thinking is that your question? Like, what is the live interaction? This is so this
is what happens. And you're doing great. There's no wrong answer happens when we start
to process these things. We we don't know. Yeah. And then it's like, Oh, my gosh, I don't
I don't know. I don't know. And then we kind of just stay there sometimes. Yes. You get
stuck there. I'll just I'm gonna wait for the Lord to give me more. But I don't know.
Sometimes there's requiring for there to be a press. Yes. And some, and some trying some
things right. And starting maybe to write things down. That was good. Didn't know.
would the answer be?
That's kind of beyond just the, I don't, you're doing great.
You didn't do anything wrong.
I just, I wanted to, this is how the conversation goes
when we're by ourselves and we're not on anymore
with Lindsay and Bruce.
It's like, we're like really motivated.
Like, yeah, we're going to go deeper,
but then we just don't know.
Yeah.
And that's me and I'll stay stuck there.
You nailed it.
But we, but even in just talking it out loud,
we realized, okay, it's not a book.
A book's a good idea.
It's not what I want.
I want some live interaction.
I want to get hands on, right?
So it's not a stagnant course.
It's not me just coming up with six weeks
or 12 weeks of teaching.
No.
Ongoing.
Okay, and then we start to ask,
like, what would it take for that transformation?
What do we feel like the framework would be?
And guys, we're probably not going to know.
Bruce and I did not know what the finalized framework
would be when we started doing
our Kingdom Messenger Workshop.
We didn't know because we hadn't done it before.
We had to prove it.
And we were open with people.
When they joined our first 90 day intensive,
we said, guys, you are early adopters.
You're a case study group.
We've never done this before.
So we're going to try out some things
to see if we can bring you
from not having any social media presence
or intentional ministry, social media presence
to growing something, launching, growing.
And we had to build kind of a framework as we went.
We had some ideas, but we didn't know.
So what we had to do was we had to say,
well, if we did know, what would the answer be?
I think it's this.
We're going to do this.
We're going to kind of break beyond the I don't know
and just try it because we won't know until we get it.
And then you guys know, I mean, you've been with us.
We did the 12 month membership because we thought,
because we did the 90 day intensives,
we loved it so much.
And we're like, you know what would be even better?
If we just gave people more time and space,
we'll do a 12 month membership.
And then we realized it was too much space
because people begin, they had the excuse of,
oh, well, I can't make it this week,
but I'm with them all year.
So I'll just do next week.
And some habits were formed.
And I know there's some realities in people's lives
where they couldn't make it.
There's no shame, blame or anything.
We just, as mentors, we realized,
okay, I don't think this is bringing action.
You know, we want to bring the action to people.
What can we build?
You guys have been with us on the journey
and we appreciate it.
But now it's your turn.
Because if you remember,
our desire is to leverage the digital landscape
to disciple nations, not just reach nations,
which we're definitely doing and it's exciting,
but there's a deeper level.
And to be quite honest,
I knew that from the beginning,
like a big critical, a big critique
that I would get from people,
which we've gotten from some people is
you can't disciple people with short form content
or a social media channel.
And I feel like I've got some righteous challenge to that.
However, I know, and I knew from the beginning,
there's something deeper, but I couldn't start there.
I couldn't do Facebook ads saying,
do you want to build an online community
and become a discipler, become a mentor,
whatever language is meaningful to you.
I had to start with, you have a message
stirring in your heart,
but you just don't know how to get it out there
into the world.
It's where I had to start, I had to pace it.
And now we're in a place where we spent time,
we've learned together, we're building a culture,
we have an engine room, we've got you guys
pressing in kind of this inner circle
because we want to disciple nations.
We want people to be marinated in the truth, right?
Saturated, connected, not just inspired,
not just motivated, but transformed.
So let me hear from somebody else,
like, what are you guys thinking for you?
It doesn't have to be what Tamara said.
It doesn't even have to look like Kingdom Messenger.
It does not have to be an online community,
but what do you feel like would be a deeper level
for you bringing that breakthrough to your home?
You've given me a lot to think about, Lindsay.
And for me, I have one particular person
who answered and sent me a message
and he has some kind of disease
and he's now a quadriplegic.
And he, I can't remember what he asked me,
but I just sent him a message back
about sharing his concerns with God,
sharing all of his fears,
sharing all of that stuff with him,
and then just waiting on him in his presence.
And he wrote back something,
and it was obvious from his message.
reply, he said, I'm just going to have to change the way I'm thinking and the way I'm doing things.
And it's obvious he's been praying, but not the right way. And you know, there are people like
that, that need help so badly. And there's other ladies who, this is where I'm at, and I don't have
that faith, and I want that faith. You know, and there's so many that say they watch me regularly.
And I don't know what the next step is. The thought of going live, I feel no desire to do that right
now. And I know that God will show me, he'll make it really clear. But like you said, these people
need more than what I can give them right now. And yet, I honestly believe that everybody who
watches something all the way through, and likes it, has received something from it. I don't for
a minute doubt that. I know that God is revealing to people that need to know. And I don't have that
fear of, you know, even one day, and I've stopped doing the weekly thing. Because I found that my
videos didn't have the quality, the quantity, no, I had the quantity, but not the quality.
I wasn't satisfied with what I was producing. And so when I feel like doing videos, I do them.
And like yesterday, I was sitting down to pray and didn't feel any peace, decided I'd go out and post
a card to my sister-in-law. My brother died a few weeks ago. And I noticed this
dress store over the road, and I thought, oh, I think I need to go in there. And I went in,
I picked something out, etc. And I know the lady's a Christian, and I started talking to her.
And it's like God just gave me a prophetic word for her. I talked about her carnal nature,
she had no idea what that meant. I had to explain it to her, and went through this process,
and I felt such a strong anointing. And I came home thinking, you know, it's so important that
I'm doing what God wants me to do, and not what I think I ought to do. Even if it means not doing
a video right at that moment. There's a time when I sit down, and I know I'm meant to do that.
But other times, I'm just doing it. And it made me realize that it's listening to God's voice,
and going with his spirit leading us. That's the answer in whatever we do.
And so, with this thing with the online, I know I'm meant to be there. I did post something today.
It was only this early this afternoon that I finally got something on. But
I'm just absolutely confident God is going to show me what the next step is.
The fact that you're talking about it, I really hadn't thought about that. I'm just doing it.
And tuning in to what God wants, and sometimes it's unexpected.
And sometimes, I'm not even the one that gets all the likes. But I know I'm doing what he wants,
and it really doesn't matter. So, it's like you said, I'm needing to stay in a place of rest,
because that's where I'm going to find out what's next. I'll figure it out with my mind.
So, that's, yeah.
By love, that's what you're doing.
Yeah, yeah.
A place of love. You're operating from a place of, I have to earn, I have to prove.
You have total confidence in the Lord to give you what you need, when you need it.
You're there. That's what you're operating in.
Yeah, yeah. And every time I do a video, I have to wait for him, for that love to be there,
before I say anything. Because otherwise, it doesn't, it's like I'm not tuning into the
spirit otherwise. So, I find that makes a difference to me.
You come with an expectation. So, this is what I used to do, before I understood this,
is I would sit there to write, and I would feel frustrated, or I would feel no peace,
or I feel like I was like, you know, striving, like, get it done. Because there was no
expectation that when I sat down, love was going to meet me there and give me what I needed.
I felt like I was still operating out of self, right? Just self. Not me and the Lord, just me.
And so, that's what has been shifting in everything that I've been doing,
and continues to shift. And kind of to a place, and with posture, where I got really comfortable.
Hey, I need, I need a renewed expectation because this is not,
this isn't just becoming exhausting, but I am not showing up as myself.
If Valencia is having a mini meltdown over one titled wrong.
Now I get it.
It was like, not theologically correct, but like fixable, deletable, right?
Like something is off and being honest enough with ourselves.
Because we are, I believe we're all places of maturity in the Lord, where
there's a commingling of desires.
Cause you even said, Marianne, like I'm not sitting down doing
what I feel like I ought to do.
Right.
There's not this like obligate oppression of obligation.
What I would love for us to be as we're discovering with the Lord, like, what is
it like, what is the deeper level?
Like, what is it that I want to do?
What do I want to do now?
Some of you are going to struggle with that because it's
not going to feel humble.
By admitting what you really want.
Like, I want to write a book.
I want to be a bestselling author.
I want to like be on stages.
I want to be speaking.
Others of you are going to struggle because you don't think what you
want is what the Lord wants.
Cause there's been a conditioning or a teaching that you've been under where
you are, I thought if I want it, it must be something else as mature sons of God.
One with Christ filled with his spirit sourced by the father.
He's involved in our desires.
The old is dead, old, sinful, deadly, dead end desires are gone.
So we're exercising at a different level.
The level is seated in heavenly places with Christ.
We want what he wants by default, but we're so afraid of getting it wrong.
That we don't even enter into that conversation with him.
We just shut it down.
So there's a safety guys.
There's a safety in Christ for us to try some things, to have the conversation.
What do I really want?
How do I want to be serving my who?
What do I want that to look like?
It doesn't have to look like what we did.
It doesn't like have to look like.
It might be something that hasn't been done yet before.
Who else wants to share?
And see, I feel like what we're talking about probably will be, I'm going to
schedule one-on-one with you, you know, um, cause I have like so many ideas.
And so to hone it in and, and a lot of them have been like prepped through
things, the Lord's spoken to me, you know, prophetic visions that he's given me.
And, um, like a year ago when I was like, it was like, literally I had just launched.
I was like a day or two in and he was really unveiling some performance and
the need to, you know, need for healing.
But as I was going to sleep, I, I had a vision and I mean, and I was awake, but
the vision was when I closed my eyes, I opened my eyes, I'm like, what's going on.
But what I saw were the faces of people.
I always, I mean, I've had a few more of those since, but Jesus is always there.
Sometimes he's looking to, you know, it's a profile that I recognize him and
some people I recognize, and then some of them, I, I know I recognize, but
they don't look the same they're younger or whatever.
And I was like, you'll tell me when, when I need to know, but I feel like what,
what he has shown me is that there, he, he wants me to help people like
identify the prophetic in people and like speak what's in there and like
help them learn to, to hear God.
And I mean, that's just one area because I don't know how that connects to, um,
like putting a.
robe and a crown. God gave me a vision of that when I was when I was 40 years old and
him doing that with myself and I received it, but really I think I just really got it last week,
you know, but it was like he reminded me because I did this. I'm not an artist, but I like drawing
and I had drawn this picture from my husband and had had my picture. He asked this for his
40th birthday for portraits and I had to take my best friend with me to even look at the proofs
because I couldn't stand to look at myself and she'd go, hey, that's a good one, you know,
and then it was like the Lord led me to do these, which I didn't understand the prophetic,
but these prophetic drawings, watercolors every so often in this little album that I did for my
husband and last week when all that was going on, he said, go find that and, you know, at the very
end, I couldn't stand because it was a self-portrait that I did on top of that. I mean, I was just
being obedient. I was just laying it down and I've had just a dream of doing like young women and
put, you know, like putting their crown on them and showing them who they are and putting that
robe on them. I mean, like walking them through that and getting them there, you know. That's super
cool. So anyway, but we do need a one-on-one, don't you, wouldn't you agree? Angela, we're going to go deep.
I've got some ideas for you. That's exciting. So Cindy or Susie, I know Kathy's driving, so I'm
going to let her pay attention. I don't even know if she's still on, but I know she was driving.
Let's hear from you. What are you thinking?
Cindy, you want to go for it? I haven't done anything. I don't feel like I'm at that point yet to have,
I mean, you know that I want to do like an online course eventually sometime. That's my heart. I want
to teach and do like all this stuff with TikTok and I want to get on YouTube and Instagram. That's
my next goal I'm shooting for, so that I have all three. And then eventually do the online course,
but I haven't really done enough like with my who to know yet. So that's why. That's where you're at.
Yeah, that's where I'm at. Yeah, so because I think one of the things and what we're hoping to do in
this four months is kind of what was that next thing for you guys, like starting a group or
something or having something even where people would pay to be a part of it. And we didn't have
a social media channel for Kingdom Messengers and we didn't have a course for Kingdom Messengers
when we launched Kingdom Messengers. We just said we're doing this thing and a bunch of people
showed up on a live Zoom call and then that was it. It didn't require a lot of extra preparation,
if that makes sense. So I think hopefully we can help you guys launch this idea in the next
four, you know, something like this. But I think obviously we're kind of laying the groundwork as
far as the why and kind of a deeper thing, but what do you want to say? I'm just smiling because
Bruce is like such a, he's like a man of action. Yeah, but yeah, that's all I'm saying is those
things may not be so far out. That's all things like your expectations. Yeah, I'm like, oh,
Samara wants to do a monthly group. Like I'm like thinking about, I'm pretty sure she could
do that tonight if she wanted to. Like we could launch that tonight, right? But we want to help
you guys with that because we've seen a lot of things like that launch. And we're really excited
about having you guys launch your own groups where you're sitting on calls like this, helping your
crew with these things that this. However, it might not be a group. Yeah, it may be one-on-one.
It could be one-on-one coaching and mentoring. It could be a book. I mean, like we don't want to
create a box for you. That's not the point. The point is what's the deeper level.
Well, and you know, I did everything backwards. I built the website. I have the website all built
for the online courses. It's right there, ready to go. I just don't have a course on it yet.
But then now I'm learning to get your who first. Then you really know more. I like what you said
when you were going to write a book and you were glad you didn't because now you know more what
your who wants. And I think that's brilliant. And that just never occurred to me before.
So like what Bruce is saying is like, you know, you don't know what God's going to do if I start,
you know, bringing stuff out. I might get my ideas, you know, that the Lord will start revealing,
but it could be six months from now or a year. I'm really good with either one because I've
given everything to God.
him. But it's cool to just hear the vision and what you guys are saying is that that could be a
potential thing you guys are going to help us with. It could happen in four months.
Yeah, we launched Kingdom Messengers in like three weeks, like from like, you know, we've
been thinking about it. And this will happen. This is about you. There's already there's already
things that have been built within you, you and your walk with the Lord. What happened for us,
which I believe, it's not that you're starting, you think you're starting from scratch.
But you're bringing things from past experiences and past seasons into the present. And in many
ways, like we I think for us pulled some of the future into the present prophetically,
for Kingdom Messengers, because we didn't have a map for it. So yeah, yeah, just never know.
Hey, Kathy, I see your hand.
I just wanted to say hi, I have to go into a doctor's appointment. But I just wanted to share
that the questions of going seven layers deep and asking those questions is just transformative.
Like I have struggled with really putting in a nutshell my my why and my who it's it's like,
so I just want to thank you for leading us down that path because it's been huge. And also,
it just expands your why so much more because you just keep adding to it as you go through all of
those layers. And so I'm super excited about that. And I have all of these ideas because I didn't,
I never ever thought I would be doing short form content.
But I have ideas for an online community. And I feel like that's what God's been leading me
into. Did I disconnect you? No, we can still hear you. We just turned the video.
You're just freezing. Okay, I I thought maybe I had done something accidentally. So I just
I do want to talk with you about that one on one because that was the direction I was headed
before I met you. But I didn't know how to make it happen. And so I'm excited that it looks like
you're going to be leading us down that, that pathway. So I just wanted to thank you and say
I'm super excited. And I just bless your time at the conference. And I'm gonna say bye for now.
Thank you, Kathy. Okay. Bye. Bye, everyone.
Okay, Susie, before we close out, I just want to hear from you what's going on in your head
and your heart. I feel like there's this threshold that I'm about to cross. And that I've decided,
yes, I am. You know, obviously, I am crossing it, even though I have no idea what it is.
I just spent some time with a prophetic life coach that was very enlightening.
And I have always wanted to be some sort of a life coach, but then thought now I can't do that.
And now I'm starting to think that maybe that is what I would like to do. And I appreciate the fact
that I've got the website that I can archive. I think that those Greek words are important for
people who want the safety of if they're going to dive off this cliff, they need to know that
it's scriptural. And so I'm thinking, yes, archiving that and having some sort of a
community where people can talk. So I think that that is so what I was getting from this, this guy
was that I'm seeking truth. I love excellence. I'm seeking connection with people. And but then
there's that part that I know that that the bottom line is, is the joy for the joy of it,
because I've spent so much of my life struggling to do it right, you know, to be excellent to do
those things to avoid disconnection. That was a big part of the of the conversation
was fear of wrong because of avoiding disconnection. So I am very much like being
bombarded with thoughts. I didn't take notes during that session. I think I've forgotten it
all. And then I'm realizing, no, it's inside of me. It's part of it. It will help. You know,
it'll come open. I don't know about being online. I'm enjoying doing the tech talks. I'm thinking
that probably I'm just going to keep throwing out dots. And people can. Well, you've talked
about that before. God connects those dots. So, yeah, I
And I am thinking of something much more one-on-one,
listening to people, knowing instead of trying to help
people, you know, seeing their problems and fixing them
to just listening to what the Lord is doing in them
and then whatever he has to say.
That's awesome.
That's exciting.
Okay, well, here's the homework for this week.
And you'll have a little bit less time
because we're meeting on Tuesday.
So I'd like for you to get it done before our next call
is I first would like for you just to report,
like, where do you feel like you are on that scale?
Like doing things out of fear, doing things out of faith,
doing things out of love.
Just share, just share where you feel like you're at,
like honestly, as you can.
And also the last, so that's the first thing.
And then I want you to share the answer to this question.
What do you want?
No parameters, just what do you want?
So take some time to sit with that question.
Do you want to go live or what do you want?
Yeah, just like we did, post it in Facebook, go live,
just like you did this last piece of homework.
Those are, so just first, just kind of a self-evaluation.
Here's what I think I'm operating from,
fear, faith, or love, or something in between.
And then what do you want?
What do you want?
When you think about going deeper with your who,
what do you want that to look like?
And if you don't know, if you didn't know,
what would the answer be?
Press in a little bit, share the process.
It's awesome, all right.
Thank you everyone for sharing.
Thanks for being flexible.
I'm gonna be watching the rest of the videos
of you guys who have shared your why,
who haven't been able to go through.
I know I'll comment, so you'll know that I've watched it.
And it's been good, it's been really cool
to hear you guys share.
So thank you for taking the time to do that.
And don't forget, you can jump in
and book a tech call anytime this week,
where we got some slots open.
If you guys are, if there's other things
you're wanting to run into,
that's why we're not doing that on this call,
but those are available.
And of course you can book, start working your one-on-one.
So thanks for being flexible with the day.
Yeah, we really appreciate it.
We hate to switch the time on you guys.
Especially on our second meeting,
but you guys have been around for,
like you're part of the family, so.
So we appreciate that guys.
All right, we will see you on Tuesday.
Bye guys.