Able to hear and something that we wanted to kind of get you guys geared up for so I've I've kind of taken on the month of October because I felt like it was really important for us to lay some internal groundwork that we could build upon as we start to architect, you know, these visions that we have and the deeper layers. We want to go with our who as we go into November, I'm passing the baton a little bit. I mean, I'll still be here, but Bruce is going to really help come and strategize. Like, how do we build this thing?
So any questions that you guys might even be having right now of like, the tech or pricing? Or how do we like, what does this look like? Even we'll talk like some marketing things as well, that we're we're heading into that. So if that has come up, and you're like, maybe overwhelmed, or like, I don't, am I allowed to ask these questions? Absolutely. Those are, we're going to get our hands dirty. Like, those are all the things, the next four months that we're going to be talking about. So I just didn't want you to think, you know, for the next four months, we're
going to be sitting here, though, it would be awesome. And just doing internal work, because this is also about continuing to take external territory as well.
So and then, yeah, more on the tech side, obviously, you guys can jump in book calls. I know some of you guys, we've been helping with some tech, tech, helpline. So, yeah, next month, we're going to kind of figure out how to go from some of this, Liz has been helping you kind of establish and refine kind of why you're doing what you're doing, what your vision is for, for
this new ministry that you've created. And so I'm going to try to come up with a couple ways that we can actually start to pull people into a closer level. So we basically had a lot of reach, just getting out on TikTok, and Facebook and Instagram. And now how do we help people take that next step towards us. So we'll probably look at things like setting up, you know, a way for people to give you their email address, there may be a way to do a page, or if you want to host a live event, or a
live prayer call, and have people register for that call, and basically gather, you know, things like that. So it could be free, it could be paid. As far as how you want to, you know, have people take that next step, maybe it's booking a coaching call with you as well, or a paid coaching call. All those are going to be options. So we'll have a few things, I know people at different places for where they're at in their online ministry. So yeah, we can we'll look at that. But we'll definitely go into kind of big picture strategy stuff on the Tuesdays. And then we'll use those tech
support calls, we can hop on specific calls with any one of you guys to get that set up. And it'll be kind of ongoing, we'll continue the internal stuff.
And that'll happen definitely in parallel. But we want you guys to start thinking, I mean, you guys have been thinking, but we don't want you to think that this is just like dreaming, like this is going to be like boots on the ground stuff as well. And you know, sky's the limit. So I know some of you have even mentioned like, hey, I want to do product, like I want to do merchandise, like how do you set up a store?
Like, how do you source things? Like, how do you publish a book? Like, if we can't, if we don't know that if we haven't done that ourselves, I guarantee we know people who have and we want to bring resources in because it was all about advancement, right. And so this is not about advancing into doing something that looks exactly like what we've done, though it could. But this is about what you and the Lord have been talking and dreaming about and how we can resource you or connect you with the right resources. Like that's our hearts and our vision for these next four months. So
it's good. Yeah, I think. And then just a reminder that next, is it Monday? I think you have your prayer call.
But not next Monday, because there's it's there's like an extra Monday in October, but the 7th of November. Yeah. So you'll see that that'll be for our next prophetic prayer call. First Monday of every month. That's an easy way to remember it. So
awesome. Okay, so since I didn't get to watch all your videos that came in, I want to get some feedback. I want to hear how was it like this exercise of writing the vision down? Like, highs and lows, both are just one of those things. Like, what was it like? Who's willing to just like jump in and be like, this is, were there barriers? Were there stretching? Like, go ahead and unmute yourselves. Hey, Marianne, I see your hand.
I did it at the last minute, because honestly, I was busy with other things. And yesterday, I was totally overwhelmed. And I said, God, I want to know what I can do in this video. And the first this morning, a memory came to me from I had
Oh, probably a couple of months after I started in Kingdom Messenger. And it was very specific.
And so I what that's what I've put on my life. Basically, he showed me what I was not to do.
Okay, it's not not teaching in a healing, not teaching deliverance, but leading them into
God's presence, and turning them over to him. So this is
huge. For me. That was huge. Yeah. And so now I know, okay,
that that definitely puts boundaries around what I'm
doing. And I know it's right. And for me, that's discipleship.
It's not, it's not trying to solve somebody's problems, but
leading them to the one who can.
Yeah, absolutely. Because this is what this is, this gets me so
excited. Marrying is like, this is exactly what I wanted for us
was when we were talking about the restraints or the
boundaries. It's not just for what we're going to be doing.
But it also gives us clarity on what what we're not going to be
doing. And there's freedom in that because we're not supposed
to just like we're not called to reach the whole world. We're not
called to be everything to everyone. Right? Like, this is
this is about being focused on what it is that the Lord's
wanting to partner with us in and serving people well. And
even though there's lots of needs that are who has, what is
the need that we feel like the Lord's wanting to partner with
us and because there's, there's he's partnering with other
people too, for all the other things, but we don't have to
fill every single need that our who carries. That's awesome.
Hey, Amy.
Mary, that's so huge for me. Because I feel like that just
puts this piece to part of my puzzle that I need, which
Lindsay, you said, you know, last week, like, we're gonna see
each other in our stories in our whatever's, you know, and I
wasn't expecting to get such a whammy just now from the Lord.
But I feel like, for me, what was a big highlight, because
there are a lot of things I would like to do. And each and
every one of them is a dream in itself. But one thing that I
know, I feel like, particularly just like a strong leading and a
strong desire over the next couple of months, is to somehow
gather my daughters, like, and I have a lot of daughters that
I've collected through the years that I've adopted into my heart.
And, and I said this before, I've missed them. And I know
they miss me. And they've been sweet to just, you know, let me
push pause. And I feel like what God has put into my heart is
like a commissioning of them, because they're all gifted in
the prophetic. I see them all just on the precipice of being
launched into into purpose. And some know it and some don't. But
for them to, you know, be commissioned, and I don't know
what that looks like. But Lindsay, you and I can talk
about it on Thursday.
Yeah, I'm looking forward to that conversation.
But that I mean, I know, it's a releasing them to God's
presence. Like, you know, a mom is always a mom. But, but then
your daughters become moms, you know. And I think that's what
I'm releasing them to do, you know, is to go and be excited
about that. And I don't know, you know, that gives me clarity
on that. And then I'll just say one more thing. So this morning,
like life happened, like a freight train this week for me,
like I just had to hop on and ride, you know, it was just, you
know, full, full, full, in a good way, but full. And so this
is more, I feel like God has been fathering me during this
time that we've been in this, like in a way that I maybe
didn't believe I got to be fathered, you know, well, and
probably didn't, I was, you know, anyway, he's coming along
and showing me where I was fathered. And this morning, he,
I just was praising him. And he just like, downloaded into me,
I was writing as fast as I could, until just a little while
ago, a prophetic allegory, my husband walked in for lunch, I
said, I have got to read you this. And he's like, that needs
to be a book. And so I don't know. I mean, and I was like
laughing, I was having so much fun. Like the words that were
coming from heaven in this, which is, it's just a prophetic
allegory of what God is doing on earth right now in the body of
Christ. And so anyway,
that was a highlight and it wasn't even part of my assignment.
Well, I think it is connected because, you know, and we'll talk a little bit
more about this today as we talk about restraints and boundaries and all those
things, but, you know, we have to remember that we
have, we serve a God who takes free will very seriously. It's a gift that he's
given us, didn't have to give us that gift and he did, and so when we
powerfully choose something,
resource opens up, creativity opens up, innovation opens up because we have
chosen to open ourselves up to it, if that makes
sense, and so the universe gets a lot of
credit unfortunately for this, you know, people are like, oh the universe is just
following me with the, you know, probably heard your friends or, you know, it's
like, oh yeah, the universe, but we know we serve a God
who is all, is our all in all, and that includes in our choices, but he
has given us the gift of making the choice, right, and so
you guys have, you've taken a step out and you've chosen some things, right,
you've chosen to become a kingdom messenger, you've chosen to dream
with the Lord, you've chosen to write the vision down, begin putting that together,
thinking about what could this look like, you've
pushed past, you know, resistance of either feeling disqualified, feeling like
I don't know how to do this, feeling like I don't know
what the answer is to this question, and things are opening up,
things are opening up, and it's fun, right, Amy?
So fun, and let me just tell you, each one of you,
I mean, as I've just continued to dream about where this could go, you know, I
mean, because like, I could make it into a very short thing, but
like, no, I could keep going with this, and each one of you all
could be a character in my book. As long as I'm not the villain, Amy, in
your book. I don't want to be the villain in your
story. No, no, no, you're gonna be like, you're gonna be like a general.
I love it, I love it. That's really cool. Hey, Susie, I see your hand.
I just wanted to say thank you, thank you, Marion. There's a part of me,
like my mind says, oh yes, I've got that, but then my heart
deeply knows, oh no, I need to hear that over
and over and over. We are freeing people to connect with
Holy Spirit themselves, and I guess that, you know,
just our previous experience and thinking just
needs to keep hearing that. So thank you, and
thank you, Amy. Same thing, and that's what's happening with me.
To answer your question, this was very frustrating and annoying,
and it was, you know, good to finally sit down.
There's this part of me that I'm getting over that is,
if I sit down with paper and pen, Holy Spirit's not going to talk to me.
I'm just going to be sitting there, and so I'm,
you know, gradually getting it, oh no, He has always shown up.
He will show up. I can get, you know, just skip that whole
thinking thing. So in the previous, with my website, I previously
think, okay, all of these Greek words archived in
kind of a library with rooms for chat rooms, and this
morning I kind of have this beautiful sense of this
lovely bookstore that they don't exist anymore. The bookstore that has a coffee
shop with comfortable chairs and, you know,
just this wonderful, it was an old building
atmosphere that didn't feel creaky. It felt warm and
and just see, okay, I want a place like that,
a nice little coffee shop, and instead of having these
Greek words in tomes, to have these little booklets around
that somebody say, okay, yeah, tell me what does this called near mean, and
where is the scriptural background for that,
and to be able to say, yeah, let's just look at that. And I
have no idea who will want to come to this,
but I'm seeing that it could be a place where ministers could send
their people, or ministers could gather information from,
but I also want a place where ministers can come and
say, okay, I'm seeing right brain, left brain, how does that connect with
our gut, and what are we going to do with, and what do we do with
God's presence, and how do we access God's presence, but
not in an academic way, in a fun, light-hearted,
comfortable, open to everybody, non-threatening, non-intimidating Greek
words, you know, to have something that's open.
It's very much what I experience with math, because all of our,
most of our attitudes towards math, and seeing math is not that way at all.
It's wonderful, it's beautiful, and if we approach it that way, it's delightful,
and I kind of want that to be with Jesus.
Holy Spirit and the Bible. The Bible is important. We need to know what the Bible is really saying.
I want you to make math delightful for me.
Oh, I love it.
I am going to somehow, Lord keeps doing this. I am going to write a parallel because I think,
oh, I learned this about math. Oh, and it applies to Jesus. And I learned this about Jesus and
teaching Jesus and sharing, oh, it applies to math. So instead of saying, oh, this is this,
I've decided I'm calling this thing that can be math or Jesus, wonder. And so I've got it
in the back of my mind. Wonder is misunderstood and misrepresented.
You should unpack that.
I love that word. I love wonder. I'm practicing wonder right now. So I will
apply wonder to math. And Susie, you've convicted me.
Just say yes, Lord. Thank you.
Yes, Lord. Thank you. I love it. I love it. So, okay, I see Cindy's joined us and Monica
and Kathy. And I just was explaining to everyone that I have not watched everyone's videos because
they did not populate on my feed until like right as I was about to get on this call. And I was
telling Tamara, like, oh, I don't think anyone's done the homework assignment. She's like, a lot
of people have done it. So all that to say, I haven't heard everyone's like ahas, but if you're
willing to share a little bit of like, what was this exercise like for you of actually writing
the vision down? Was it something that you guys had attempted before? Or was this like the first
time that you had decided I'm going to write what's in my heart, like get it down on paper?
Like, just raise your hand. Who's was it? Who was the first time of ever doing this?
Cindy and Marion. Okay. All right. So I want to talk a little bit today. Did you guys have
anything you wanted to share? Monica or Cindy? You're good.
Can I share something?
Oh, yeah, sure. Go ahead.
I was fine until I had to get on live. You know, I found that I can write it and it's in my mind.
And then when I have to get on live, it's like goes all crazy. So I'm not sure if that's just
practice. But I feel like I don't want to keep doing it because you guys say just do a raw live,
you know. And so I don't know. I guess that's something that comes with practice.
So is the barrier for you like being live on camera?
Like not so much exercise, but actually getting up and sharing your heart live?
I think it's a combination of that. Yes, yes.
I think a lot of people have struggled with that, like on various levels. Like I know that's been
a lot of feedback that we've gotten from people kind of over the two years of us doing this is
like, I don't want to be live. But it seems like there's something deeper because there's an
emotional response. So do you feel like do you feel like it's a like you're feeling like you
have to perform? I guess it is a perfectionist thing where I wanted to be so exact, you know,
that you have like a one chance to say it and then it's, you know, can't go back and erase and,
you know, get a better word there. But I think it is. I mean, like I said, that my audience is
getting the information from screens, whether it's Instagram or reading or something like that.
I don't think that it's going to be something I just have to get there, you know, and we're
working on different products and different ways of setting it up. But I don't know if it gets any
easier the more you do it. I mean, you've been doing it longer and some of the ladies here have
been doing it longer, I guess. Does it get any easier or is it just you've got to make a decision
not to think about it or. Yeah, well, before I answer, does anyone have some wisdom to share?
Because you guys have been through this. I know many of you have. Hey, Mary, and I see your hand.
Yeah, I think for me, Bridget, even with the one minute videos, I found that I have to think about
it in my mind, everything clear in my mind. Yes, I have things in order and then can speak on live
because because I know what I'm going to say. I have an understanding. I just go out and I have
a list and think it through first. Then then I just get muddled. You know, that's what I do.
Write it out and then I kind of the more I do it, the better it seems to come for the flow.
But then when I look back at the videos, it looks very presented and it doesn't look
conversational. And that's what everybody keeps saying. You've got to be talking to a person or
somebody specific. And I feel like the more polished it is, the more perfect it looks, which
is not natural. So there's this kind of balance of I don't know, it's just getting it, making it
like like one of the ladies here said, just pretend you're talking to somebody on FaceTime
and then let it just go. But that isn't like that because you.
you're talking to somebody you can see their facial response and you can see that they're
getting it and that encourages you so I don't think there's I mean I have to do this it's
just something I realized that's why I'm here because I realized this has been my who's going
to be on on social media and in short content so Bridget I can say I mean I'm I struggled with the
whole perfectionism thing you know for a very very long time and um and it's just a journey
and I do think there's a stretching and a growing that has happened with me in releasing the
the imperfect yes yes to the holy spirit can use that and that I mean and that happens in the
journey of just getting in front of the camera and somewhere in there you fall in love with
the people on the other side of the screen and that becomes more natural yes yeah I guess as
you as you picture different people you start seeing their hearts and the need for what you're
saying I think that's that's probably a driving force you know so well thank you I'm going to
keep going and in my in my struggles with this I found okay I don't want to be rigid and then I was
like too grasping for straws and try to remember what it was I was wanting to say my problem with
with live is that I want to delete it and start over and and I can't um well you you know you
notice I posted twice because I didn't know how to stop it um yeah the other well and then there
are then I found out how I could stop it and anybody who is watching me actually live would
see all these false starts and I just so I think what I want to do in the interim is to just on the
video on the camera video do it for myself and just practice it a bit for myself because I did
find after saying it three or four times I was more comfortable and I think this is just a
temporary thing the other thing is is I was posting um because I'm used to on my laptop
kingdom messengers getting on the kingdom messengers and posting there but the the live
posting on the laptop was awkward for me and when I gave up and went ahead and did it on my camera
I saw how much easier it was to post and to like discard it and all of that so just knowing that
it's going to be easier on the camera has helped me a lot but I saw all you like Monica yes it gets
easier I think yeah and Marianne's saying he has to say it three or four times and you get comfortable
with it I think we'll get through that we don't want to be stilted but we do want to be not
grasping for words all the time I guess it's that balance that I'm trying to find there though
well thanks for that encouragement yeah so this is an important conversation guys because um
there's layers and levels to all that we're doing right so for some of us it's going live for others
of us it's taking on a new platform for others it's going to be doing a new business venture
or building a ministry we never thought would come to fruition you know there's there's going to be
those times when like it it's not just hard but it's bringing out negative emotions in us
you know it's bringing out either a sadness or a frustration or a discouragement or a disappointment
and I am learning and I want to give Ashley she's not on this call today but I want to give Ashley
Nicole Perez credit because she's but she has been a friend and a mentor who started to walk me
through this is those negative emotions are attached to an unbelief so it's not wrong to
feel a negative emotion in fact I am realizing that it's actually negative emotions are a gift
from God and that he gives us in order so that we can release pain like so we actually have an
outlet I think some of us have learned me included that we think that if some if I'm feeling bad
about something that means something is bad about me and that's not true that's shame right
not that I'm just doing something wrong but something is inherently wrong with me
and that's an identity issue we should take that very seriously not like beat ourselves up with it
but we should allow ourselves to fully this is what this is what Ashley's been teaching me I
do want to give her full credit and what I'm practicing and finding great breakthrough in
is like allow that allow that emotion to fully be expressed do it with the Lord right and ask
the Holy Spirit to lead you and guide you into the truth of what is this
What unbelief is attached to this emotion?
What am I not believing about myself?
So for some of us, it could be this feeling of unsafety.
I know that was for me, especially when I started off with posture.
I did not feel safe putting my face out on the internet, right?
It felt very exposing.
It felt very at times.
I felt like I was setting myself up for, you know, ridicule and
criticism and you know, feedback that was like not helpful, but the
Lord had walked me, the Lord walked me through that process with
him, but I had to allow myself to feel it, right?
I couldn't just say this, I'm fine.
Everything's fine.
This is fine.
That's avoidance.
That's bypassing the beautiful opportunity to bring something to
the Lord and surrender it to him fully so that we experience
breakthrough freedom and healing and wholeness like that conversation
has to be had.
So if anyone finds themselves in a situation where this is bringing
up some negative emotion in me, whether it's frustration or
disappointment or discouragement or just sadness or anxiety, like
whatever it is, ask the Lord to illuminate.
Like what am I attaching this unbelief?
Is it something I'm believing about myself?
Lord, is it something I'm believing about you?
For me, it was twofold.
I was believing that I was unsafe.
So therefore I was actually believing that it was a belief I was
holding against the Lord.
Like you're not going to protect me in this.
You've called me to this place and you're leaving me uncovered and
shielded though.
I was not consciously thinking that that's what was manifesting,
right?
And I was also believing something about me and that was I felt
disqualified.
I felt like I couldn't keep this up that I was walking on Terry.
I was walking into territory that I could not maintain and that wasn't
true either.
Right?
So there's layers and levels to that.
But and I and I I think it's because there is always more to overcome
and that's a good thing, right?
There's no arrival point.
This is a journey as we overcome.
We will continue to overcome with the Lord.
We become more than conquerors in one area and he moves us to a next
and it's not a it's not something that's supposed to that.
It's not it's not to our demise.
I want to say that right?
It's not like oh my gosh, here's another thing that I'm dealing with
because again, we internalize this we think we take on shame and
condemnation.
We think I'm I'm facing another difficulty because of something's
wrong with me and it's actually a new adventure with the Lord.
And it's okay if we don't feel immediate joy about it.
Like if there's something that rises up in us, it's a revealing for
healing.
So as we were writing down the vision this week, and I know some of
you guys are continuing in that exercise and we're going to have
some space because there's like kind of an extra month.
I'm an extra week in this month, but I want to talk a little bit
about, you know, before we here's what happens typically when we
start writing visions down.
We start dreaming with the Lord starting to put plans together is
we focus solely on this right here on this piece of paper.
It means now I must go do all these things.
We focus immediately on the doing when actually our first response
should be this is about what I now must go be.
What I now now must become right?
So the question we should be asking ourselves as you know, Susie is
you know talking about, you know, perhaps a brick-and-mortar situation
like a place like a physical location people can come or talking
about like an atmosphere that she wants to create and she wants to
steward like it's not about okay now.
Wow.
I got to go think about finding property.
I got to think about ordering furniture.
Yeah, all those things will have to happen.
But first the question we should be asking the Lord and having
conversations with him about is who now must I become to walk in the
fullness of this vision of this dream and spoil alert.
We're becoming like him.
So therefore our primary focus should be Lord.
Who are you?
This should bring us to a greater awareness of him.
This is what abiding is right?
This is not this is not about us now having to strive and struggle
to make something a reality doesn't mean it's going to be easy light.
There's like some hard things we have to tackle and take on there's
some practical things but what will happen if we primarily first
focus on that internal territory, which includes a greater awareness
of who God is and then who we're becoming in him is we will build
an internal foundation that can carry the weight of all the doing
that's required.
So I wanted to read a little bit from Psalm 16.
I know I mentioned it.
Last week a little bit.
I just want to read it.
I just, I love this psalm.
I think it's, you know,
I'm just going to adopt it as another life verse of mine.
But David writes, he writes,
"'Keep me safe, my God, for in you I take refuge.
I say to the Lord, you are my Lord.
Apart from you, I have no good thing.
I say of the holy people who are in the land,
they are the noble ones in whom is all my delight.
Those who run after other gods will suffer more and more.
I will not pour out libations of blood to such gods
or take up their names on my lips.
Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup.
You make my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places.
Surely I have a delightful inheritance.
I will praise the Lord who counsels me.
Even at night, my heart instructs me.
I keep my eyes always on the Lord.
With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
Therefore, my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices.
My body also will rest secure
because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead,
nor will you let your faithful ones see decay.
You make known to me the path of life.
You will fill me with joy in your presence
with eternal pleasures at your right hand.'"
So this is the New King James Version.
I want to point out a few things.
I mean, any translation is, you know,
you can read your favorite translation.
I just, I love this Psalm because it talks about
so much of what we're doing right now.
And it talks about what I, like David is,
David is saying what I'm going to do,
what I'm not going to do.
He talks about who the Lord is and who he is.
Like David addresses himself as the faithful one.
David calls himself the faithful one.
He talks about who the Lord is
and who the Lord is going to be for him.
This is key, okay?
Because I think we don't always think about it
in these terms of, you know, we read in scripture.
Graham Cook says it this way.
We read in scripture the promises
and we think about the one-sided implication.
So we think about what that means for me,
but we don't always think about the implications for God.
Like if God says he's our healer,
then that implies that he carries some responsibility,
right?
It's not, but we always take it of like,
what must I now go do to be healed?
We don't rest in the truth and the trust of God as my healer
so I love how David even just addresses the Lord
and he's like, hey, you're my portion, you're my cup.
I love how the Passion Translation puts it.
He says, Lord, you are my prize, my pleasure and my portion
and he talks about, and that translation talks about,
you know, I love how it says that it says,
my destiny and its timing are in your hands.
Like he totally puts it back over on the Lord
because he knows who the Lord is.
He has such security that he's like, hey,
I'm making a call on your character
because this is who you said you are.
Like he's not dictating to the Lord
or like commanding his hand necessarily,
but he's saying like, I am so secure in who you said you are
that this is what I call you.
This is how I see you, this is my perspective.
I wanna point out verse three.
I just think this is really fun.
I say of the holy people who are in the land,
they are the noble ones in whom is all my delight.
I've carried this verse in my heart for years.
I used to do work with a lot of church leaders,
names you would know, some names you wouldn't know,
but I carried this in my heart
when I first started working with them.
The New Living Translation says it this way.
It says the godly people in the land are my true heroes.
The godly people in the land.
And it was a sweet time for me, a sweet season.
It was not an easy season, but it was a sweet time
because I began to transfer affection,
not affection that was due only the Lord,
but just affection of people in that time.
Like the godly people in the land truly became my heroes
because I got to see them up close.
People say when you get to see those people up close,
you get disillusioned,
but I got to see some really cool things behind closed doors.
These people that have really amazing public ministries
doing amazing things that no one would ever see.
And it really solidified in me.
You know what?
There's worldly celebrities
that if they walk through the door,
I would honor them as another person,
but I would not fall on the floor.
But oh my goodness, if Bill Johnson walked in the room,
I might start bursting out into tears.
And it was just a really sweet time for me
as a young 20 something to realize
that there's a godly in the land.
Again, some names we know, some names I only know
because of what they poured into my personal life.
But it wasn't about the size of their ministry,
it was about the goodness in their heart
and how they carried that.
And so David's saying,
I've decided this is how I'm going,
hey, I am a Godly person.
this is a boundary for me.
I am a Godly person.
And so, I'm not just saying that
Like the godly in the land are gonna be my heroes.
because I'm a Godly person,
but because I am a Godly person.
I'm not going to get bogged down
And I really think that is the beauty of it.
with worldly platforms, positions, titles.
And I'm definitely giving no space to false idols,
false gods, or tradition.
It's like, this is what I'm gonna participate in
and this is what I'm not participating in.
These are some boundaries, right?
As we become, these are some fun conversations to have.
Now, what I don't want us to do is start thinking
about like these rules and regulations
that if we write them down,
it means for the next 20 years we're giving our lives to
and we're gonna become legalistic about them.
Like that's not freedom.
And ultimately the religious spirit will get ahold of that
and pervert things, right?
This is about having a dynamic conversation
with the godhead about what are some lifestyle choices
that I'm going to make as I become
so that my boundary lines fall in pleasant places.
And I'm not getting distracted by the wrong things.
I'm not getting caught up in assignments that aren't mine.
I'm not comparing myself to others.
Like this is a freeing conversation.
So I'll give you an example from my own life.
Cause I think that sometimes that's helpful.
Like Bruce and I are in a season,
like we've written some visions down
and you guys have been a part of those.
You've seen kind of how we've grown
Kingdom Messengers, for instance,
and where's other things that we're wanting to do
in business and with tech and all that stuff, right?
And we realized as we wrote the vision down
and we were thinking, okay,
who must we become in order to like fully take
on this vision in a way that doesn't crush us?
We realized, okay, there's some internal territory
that we need to focus on.
And there's some healing and wholeness
that we need to focus on.
Bruce's smiling at me from across the room.
He's listening in.
And so we realized like we have to actually be intentional.
Like if we're saying, hey,
here's some things that we want to find wholeness in.
We need to be intentional
about not just making a powerful choice,
but opening ourself up to resources
for healing and wholeness, right?
It doesn't mean everything has to be in crisis mode.
It's not, like we don't feel like we're in crisis mode,
which sometimes can be deceiving
because we think, well, it's fine.
We just realized, we just kind of saw
where the Lord was taking us.
And we realized, oh, there's some becoming
that has to take place.
And that's not gonna happen in isolation.
That's not gonna happen.
Like what we're doing is public.
So there needs to be some,
us opening ourselves up to some spiritual fathers
and mothers right now,
so that things aren't just like,
we're not just like rolling with the punches.
And like, we look back 20 years from now,
we're like, wow, like that crushed us.
We had no idea because we had no one,
we didn't have enough outside voices
speaking into our lives, right?
So we're now opening, we're in a season,
we're like, okay, these are the boundaries.
Like we need to be talking to people on a regular basis.
We need to be sharing our lives
with more spiritual fathers and mothers.
We need to be getting some input.
Like, so we need to pursue that.
And isn't it amazing how when you make a powerful choice
to do something, resources seem to open up.
Whether it's provision to pay for the resources
or just people and like partnerships and communities.
Like I would bet that some of you were carrying,
like I love Marian's story.
That's a perfect example
of how she came into Kingdom Messengers.
Marian felt like she had a word from the Lord.
She shared it with her pastor.
She was making a powerful choice of like, hey,
and then there's like resource came available.
So many people have that story, right?
Of like, hey, I was praying about this
or I've been carrying this in my heart.
And then I got an ad on Facebook about Kingdom Messengers.
And as much as I would love to credit our marketing genius,
we know that the Holy Spirit was up to something.
And that was our prayer too.
Lord, bring us people that we can receive.
We want people that you want in this program
for such a time as this, right?
So kind of what I want you to be thinking about
as you're writing the vision is start to,
don't start thinking about all the things you must do.
That will come, but start asking the Lord,
like who must I become?
And a way to maybe identify
like where there might be areas of becoming
is there some negative emotions attached?
Are there things coming up?
Am I feeling frustrated?
Am I feeling triggered by things?
Are there some reoccurring triggers
that continue to come up?
Because there, there might be some places
that the Holy Spirit is like putting his finger on
and saying, hey, I want to reveal something here to heal.
I wanna open up some resource for you in this area
so that there's healing and wholeness
or there's expansion that takes place
because this area has become too small
and it's, we're moving into a new season in this area.
So we need to expand into some things.
So that is like, that's not something that I can.
prescribed to you, right, because it's going to be different for each of you based on where you are
with the Lord and what you're visualizing. But it's time, you know, in a new season,
as we enter into new places, as we advance into new things, like there's upgrades to our
perspective that are going to be taking place. There's greater awareness of our intimacy with
the Lord and like what that entails, what that means, like things are opening up to me like,
wow, Lord, I never saw you in this, I never saw you this way. I probably read a million scriptures
about you being this, but I never, I never took that on for myself. Like the Lord's gentleness
to me in this season, like I knew the Lord was gentle, like knew it, but did I know it?
And guess what? As I receive his gentleness, I am becoming gentle with myself
and with other people and it's starting to overflow out of my life. And
courage, safety, you know, those are things right now that I'm beginning to expand in,
like not just here, not just knowing, but knowing, knowing. So let me get some feedback
from you guys. Is this resonating? I see some head nods.
So no disagreement, you guys are tracking, like this is something that we need to
give some time to, right?
Boundaries aren't always restrictions, sometimes boundaries are opening us up to things as well.
Yeah. I can say something. Yeah. You know, this is so good, Lindsay. Thank you. I think that
sometimes we think we healed in an area until we get tested. And I think that, you know,
I always use it when I was at seminary and we at Bible college and they did the thing of inner
healing. I like to use the example that when you're in an accident, you get, you know, you get
your breathing back and, you know, you get to, you know, obviously you have to get the blood flow
under control and then they take care of that. But then sometimes weeks and months later, you go
back into a surgery to get, you know, another level. Sometimes it's more like the plastic
surgery, the cosmetic surgery. And I think that is what sometimes happens with us. The Lord heals
something because that's what we can handle at the time. And we get our breathing, we get our
routine get going. But then I think sometimes when you get into a platform like this, especially when
you're a leader, there's another layer that you need so that you can be stronger and kind of
looking good. Not that it's a, not about the cosmetic thing, but sometimes the Lord just
requires another layer of healing because of the weight that we're going to be carrying.
And I think that that is such a healthy perspective to take because, you know, we think we're good
until we have a heavy burden that you need to carry or weight of ministry. And I think this
is a great time to go and get our hearts, you know, before the Lord and not, not that we have
to go digging. That is anything that we need to do. I think the Lord in his kindness will
bring things to life that we need to do. We need to carry. Yeah. Yeah. There's definitely,
I love that. I love that perspective of, you know, what can we handle now? So I see the goodness of
God in that because, and I know I quote Graham a lot. You guys know that, but I always try to
give credit if I can remember who taught me what they taught me, but like he talks about, you know,
slow learning is great learning. And often the Holy spirit's working with you on one thing at a
time. And so you can take, you have permission to take that pace. It doesn't have to be 10 things.
It might be just the one thing. It could just be one or two things. And it might be something that
you're learning all year long, right? There's no, what we, what we try to do is we try to speed up
the, like the Lord literally, I think I share this with you guys. Lord literally told me like,
you're I'm doing open heart surgery right now. And I need you not to jump off the table prematurely
because it's uncomfortable to be cut open. Right. And it feels very raw and very vulnerable,
but I trust the surgeon and the surgeon gets to tell me when I can come off the table, right?
Not me, the patient, and it's going to be a little messy and that's okay. I think the
Lord provides us with some safe spaces and people in the messiness. What we don't want to happen to
your point, mom is we don't want that to, we don't want that to overflow into the people that
we're trying to serve. Right. We might have had that happen to us before with previous mentors
or leaders where it's like, they're dumping, they're dumping their stuff on you. And like
the grace is flowing in the wrong way. And it's, it's coming across weird. And I, I don't know who
said this and I wish I could give them credit, but someone once I heard someone say
in leadership, show your scars, not your wish.
Because if you're dealing with a wound, you need to be on the receiving end of some healing.
You need to be submit yourself to some leadership.
But if there's scars, there's a place of victory.
Hey, I have experience in this and I've had and I've experienced some healing.
Let me share with you the testimony of that.
It's different, right?
I think it was actually an unbeliever that shared that.
I think it was like a marketing, maybe Amy Porterfield or something.
I'm sorry, I don't remember.
But I like that wisdom.
I think it's healthy wisdom.
And guys, I know there's resistance sometimes to things that sound negative, but this isn't
negative.
This is just our journey with the Lord.
Sometimes we're going to have wounds and scars at the same time.
A wound doesn't disqualify you from leadership or ministry or doing any kind of output if
you are in a receiving mode with that area of your life, and you're receiving wisdom
and you're receiving healing and you're receiving leadership and mentorship.
There's going to be valleys and mountains sometimes in the same seasons of life.
That's okay.
It doesn't disqualify you.
Now if there are seasons where you're like, hey, I just need to take a break from any
output and I need 100% input, absolutely.
There's nothing wrong with that either.
But often, I just had a conversation with someone a couple of weeks ago and they were
battling because they're like, I feel so called to do this mothering movement, but I feel
like I have some wounds still that I need healing and therefore I don't feel qualified
to even start mentoring mothers.
And I'm like, this is a person that is solid, full of wisdom, full of grace, could be helping
some people right now, but she feels like she has to be all healed up 100% completely.
She's waiting for an arrival point and there's no arrival.
There's glory to glory.
There's continuing layers and levels.
And so, yeah.
So anyone else have anything they want to add or share?
I really like what you're saying, Lindsay, because just in the part of don't feel like
you have to jump into do all of the things, when I was going over my vision for the future,
it ended up being started off kind of with me, but then it moved quickly into legacy
and it moved into what I'm planting now and my children will be doing.
And so I was like, I'm not ready for that quite yet.
So there's a process just like you're talking about it really that kind of unfolding before
my eyes like, wow, there is a lot happening right now in my life that's creating those
scars for me to be ready to share with the kids, this is how we deal when these kinds
of things happen and I'm able to model that for them.
And then eventually they'll start taking on certain roles that are very important.
So for me, that was huge just to understand that it doesn't start and end with me, but
that there is so much more.
In this case, I'm talking about my kids, but then also it's my who, there's a legacy in
my who that I'm depositing those seeds as I'm fulfilling what the Lord has called me
to do.
So that was very exciting, very eye opening to me.
Yeah.
I mean, that's such a great point because they're spiritual kids, right?
Like we should all be thinking about what it looks like to multiply ourselves into spiritual
sons and daughters, because there's been way too many ministries, in my opinion, wonderful,
fabulous ministries that have died with the fathers and mothers, because there was no
sons and daughters raised in the ministries.
And so if we're going to be thinking like, you know, sons and daughters of God, like
there's inheritance, like that's a kingdom principle, that's a kingdom thing.
Like we've inherited and we leave inheritance.
Hey, Marian.
Yeah.
I know that I've been battling for the last two months, but what I know is that if we
are going up to a new level, there's things that we can't take with us because the enemy
will find those little weaknesses and that's where we'll come under attack.
And so I believe that God in his wisdom at these times is targeting those weaknesses,
those areas where we're weak so that we will have to battle and gain strength in those
areas. And so that we're ready to go into that next season and step out.
That's really good.
Healing, but it's not always healing.
In my case, God brought memories back from 22 years ago.
And.
I thought, I've dealt with all of that.
It's all forgiven.
But what he enabled me to see as I went through it again
was that I had placed responsibility
for something on somebody
and realized that wasn't anything to do with them.
They were just following orders.
And so he changed my picture of what happened.
And it's like, this is the picture he gave me for Hohan.
My sink's been really slow for a long time in my kitchen
and it stopped right up.
And all of a sudden I got this thought,
I should go and get the plunger.
Why I haven't done that in the last few years,
I don't know, but I did.
And all of a sudden this whoosh,
everything emptied out.
It was like, that's what he was doing.
It was symbolic.
And the stuff he has to empty out
so that we're not a target.
I love that visual of a spiritual plunger.
Because we're getting, guys,
part of this is we're getting unstuck.
We're getting unstuck.
So healing is physical, it's mental.
There's also healing.
I believe there's like a healing of memories
where I love how Marion, I love that you said,
I saw it differently.
I had a healed perspective.
I saw it clearly.
That's amazing.
Okay, so this is what I want us to focus on.
I feel like we need some,
some of us need more time for writing the vision down.
So we'll be, you know, if you haven't done that already,
or if you're just started doing that, do it.
And then included in that exercise is let's start,
like start talking to the Lord
about this boundary of who must I become.
And it can be fun.
It doesn't just have to be like, that's the one question.
Like there could be multiple questions.
Like this could include like,
what do I need to do to be healed?
What do I need to start participating in?
What do I need to stop participating in?
You know, what should I open myself up to?
What do I need to like shut the door on?
And some of this guys, I was gonna share,
I was gonna share an example,
but I don't want it to get rowdy in here.
I just, it doesn't always, it's not always character.
Okay, sometimes it's like,
I'm not going to buy these things.
I'm not gonna spend my money
on these types of things anymore.
Or I'm not gonna celebrate this type of thing anymore.
Or I'm not going to,
I'm not going to give,
I'm not gonna spend my time here anymore.
Whether that's with certain relationships
that aren't serving you for this season,
or maybe it's just hobbies.
Maybe it's, and this isn't about like becoming,
this isn't time management, okay?
This isn't time management.
This is about, I want this to,
this is about becoming someone.
Would, am the person I'm becoming,
and sometimes we just lose our taste for things.
Like we just, you know, it's not like we're,
it's not like we're taking away things that we're like,
oh, but I enjoy knitting so much.
I'm not saying that.
It's just, it's not, it's just a matter of,
there's things that I have done
because I've done them for,
I've always been known for doing this thing, right?
This is just what I do.
Okay, perfect example.
There was a season in my life
where I had a lot of people in my life that loved tea.
Okay, they loved drinking tea.
And I saw people in my life,
my mother-in-law loves drinking tea,
but I collected all of these tea cups, right?
That I was either given as gifts
because I would host like tea parties and showers.
And like my house was like the house
for hosting things, right?
And I, so I had cabinets in my kitchen
that I, that were filled with tea cups and tea things.
And I hadn't used them for three years
because that season and part of that community,
I was no longer with anymore.
And it wasn't like, oh, this bad thing, like the teacup.
It was just, oh, I just don't,
I don't host as many things anymore.
And I don't foresee myself hosting many things
in the future because I'm kind of moving my energies
and time towards different things,
different types of communities, et cetera.
So I got rid of the teacups guys.
The teacups, I kept some sentimental ones
that were like valuable and gifts, right?
But I was surrounding myself with things
that were telling me stuff I believed about myself
that was no longer true.
It wasn't bad things, but I was holding onto stuff
and I had no room in my kitchen
for the person that I am today
and the way that I needed it to serve my family
and where we are in the season.
So I got rid of some stuff, material things.
So that's an example of, it might not just be like,
oh, I need to be more patient.
It could be that.
It might be like, I need to clean out my bedroom.
I need to redecorate my office.
because the person that I'm becoming needs space to do this.
This is fun. Suzy has over $1,000 in math education books.
I think you could still hold on to them.
I'm not telling you you need to hang on to things,
but things are really important topic
because I'm having this conversation with my home right now.
Because there was a part of me I actually
left behind an old property that we used to live in,
and that was the Lindsay Van Zyl that celebrated seasons.
I would get scented soaps for fall,
and spring, and summer.
I didn't just decorate my house for Christmas,
but we decorated for Thanksgiving.
But that part of me I just had let go of because we had
had nine months of renovations and not
really having a house and living in basements.
Then by the time I got to the house,
I realized I was tired of houses.
I didn't want to decorate.
What's happened over the last,
we spend so much time in our home, guys.
But what's happened is I had this trigger,
this negative emotion that I just stuffed,
and stuffed, and stuffed, and avoided about the house.
I never wanted to spend more money on the house or decorations.
It was actually something that used to bring me life,
but I didn't want to face the negative emotion.
I know this sounds like a weird example,
but there's a spiritual principle here.
Just in the last couple of weeks,
I've opened myself back up to loving the home that I'm in,
as it is, dense and all,
and realizing that, actually,
I'm a powerful enough person to create
a home and a sanctuary for myself and my family.
I can take that on.
I'm learning that first I need to be at home within myself,
and that was the spiritual upheaval,
is I was no longer at home in myself.
So that happened, and guess what then happened?
My physical face began to transform,
and we've decorated for fall now,
and there's a welcome mat out on the door,
and there's just some nice touches
that I've been able to add to my space
because I decided I'm becoming this person,
and I'm no longer going to stifle this negative emotion.
I'm no longer going to avoid.
I'm going to have this conversation with the Lord.
So I just wanted to share those examples
because you might see yourself in some of those examples,
but it might look something like you weren't expecting,
some boundaries that you begin to set,
restrictions and things you open yourself up to,
and it can be a fun conversation.
It may not be easy, but it'll be very rewarding,
and there's no limit to the questions you can ask the Lord
with this exercise.
It just starts with the question of,
Lord, who am I becoming?
And if you get stuck there,
go back one and say, Lord, who are you?
Can you, like, is there a block?
Am I not seeing you fully in this area?
Like, what does that look like?
And then you'll begin to see the trickle-down effect
into your life and your spaces.
So this is important, guys.
Again, I know that this might sound like whimsical,
these types of exercises,
but I just felt very strongly
that we needed to spend this first month together
focusing on building this internal foundation
because as we begin to architect these external things,
we're going to have a solid foundation
for these things to rest upon,
and we won't be crushed by them.
Awesome.
Let me read what Amy, I cut all my grandkids' hair
and mended everyone's thing
that needs mending in my house and get all the stains.
I enjoy those things, but sometimes they really,
I really have to dig and pull it off, yeah.
It might just be, like, restructuring expectations.
Expectations are boundaries as well.
The expectations we hold for ourselves,
the expectations we hold with others.
I was talking to somebody this week
and they are on a church staff,
and they were saying, like,
they were overwhelmed by the tasks that they were having,
and we got in this conversation about expectations,
and they realized that they were holding
these external expectations of themselves in this role
that was actually never a part of their original role.
Like, it wasn't what they were hired to do,
but they just took on some things
that no one asked them to do,
and then they were like, I hate my job,
and we got down to it, and I'm like,
you're doing things that you weren't even asked to do.
And it was like, oh, I carried the wrong expectations.
So that's a boundary as well.
And we clean up those things, and then,
oh, actually, this isn't so bad.
This is really life-giving.
This is why, this is what I've always wanted to do.
This is my dream job, so.
Okay, any questions before we get off today's call?
Nothing, you guys are great.
Okay, so if you, and you can combine these two
if you haven't done your vision homework yet,
just like some highlights of like,
hey, this is what I've kind of discovered.
And then I would love a live for this week
about some boundaries,
if you feel comfortable sharing some.
You don't have to share all the ones,
but like, share some boundaries.
I think it would be helpful for us to hear.
is I think, you know, you might have something that the Lord revealed to you.
People like, I haven't even thought about that, you know?
Um, and so I think it's helpful for us to kind of hear how this is like, how the
Lord is like bringing this up in different areas of our lives, who am I becoming?
And so who does that person like, what is it?
What does that person look like?
How do they live?
What is their lifestyle?
Awesome.
Okay, guys, I will see you next Tuesday.
Don't forget if you need to set up a tech help hotline, call tech help.
No, tech support help.
Bruce is laughing at me.
Um, you can do that in the kingdom messenger site, and that's where you
also can schedule your one-on-ones with me.
So I thank you Tamara for putting that in the link in the chat under getting started.
All right, guys, we'll see you guys next Tuesday.