Oh, don't forget to start. Yeah, there. Thank you.
Me and I have been on for about 15 minutes. I told her, I said, remind me to start the recording at the right time.
So,
So the way that if you if y'all make biscuits from scratch the ways to make them them.
And get to give them the same texture is like Popeye's or or McDonald's is to replace the milk with mayonnaise. If you do that, how they get that that's how they get that texture.
Yeah, I'm
A little terrifying when you consider how much fat, it is, but it's also really good.
Treats. You know, you've got your
Seed oatmeal, but then we feed ourselves brownies to this is in the brownies category feature stop a tree by
By making that the biscuits of mayonnaise instead of with them.
Instead of with milk. That's how that's how they get that Christmas. Also, if you again not healthy, but if you fry things like if you fry eggs or pan toast or I don't know, whatever else in a pan with just a little bit of mayonnaise on top of it.
A little bit of mayonnaise instead of the butter, then it, it, it, it has a very interesting flavor to it as well as it kind of like crisps at the edge in a different way than butter. Now, you know,
I know it's not healthy, just like, just like, you know, certain it's not one of the oils. That's good. Once it has been heated, but we don't always eat stuff that's good for us. Sometimes we eat stuff that just tastes good.
So that's in your taste good category. That's a no. We're pretty extra hard over this one.
Before we eat it anyway.
Well,
Substituting the mayonnaise for the milk. We know fat doesn't make you fat carbs makes you fat. So eat all the man you want.
I like it. Yeah, because I'm trying to remember when I was on the Atkins diet, many, many years ago.
I lost about 30 pounds in three months. So it works, but it doesn't deal with your, it doesn't deal with the emotional reason why you're eating. So I had to
The pounds again. So I had I gained and lost 40 pounds twice in my life and gained it gained 40 pounds my freshman year of Pensacola Christian College lost it all that summer regained it
Regained it back slower, but I still regained it in that I lost it slower. And that time I in this time I've dealt with the emotional reason why I was eating so
But yeah, I can study it. My, my point saying all that is on the Atkins diet, you know, you can eat all of that fat.
And you eat fat, but you don't eat carbs. And so there were all kinds of things that I could eat. And I think one of them was mayonnaise and like cheese and lots of me bacon. It was a really nice.
For a southern girl, though, but I was surprised at how much I miss bread or even vegetables, fruits. That was hard, but that's
Go. Hey, Holly.
Hey, how are you
Are you
Good. Thank you.
I like your shirt.
Is it called
It's an entire velour track suit.
Whoo.
Cannot pass that velvet. If I see it anywhere. I can
Seriously, because I look straight out of the 80s, but I don't care.
You look really
I have a friend who does if she can't pass that glitter anything
You know,
Yeah.
Yeah. So anyway, um, so does anyone have
And does anyone have any questions. We hadn't even started with the question checks. I've just been waiting for people to hop on. Anyone have anything that they had thought of that they wanted to
Talk about actually before we get into that I can start and I was noticing that
Oh, and it's interesting, you know, so far, everybody that's on here is it was in April intensive and so I was noticing that
I was, you know, how we're all learning how to operate in a greater and greater measures of rest. So this is one of my areas in which the Lord had to stretch me a bit.
To me that, okay, actually, we're just not operating in as much rest as you had hoped.
And in all areas. And so with the April intensive what I done, you know, and creating all those lives and this Q AMP. A's is I had wanted so much to make sure that everyone felt safe in the group to just be able to express whatever they wanted in full transparency to allow themselves to shift
And and I didn't even want to ask anyone if they would be willing. If I transferred over the lives and Q AMP. A's.
Because even though they wouldn't be transferring posts or anything like that. I didn't even want to ask
Well, what the Lord showed me. And so I was just redoing all of the teachings, which has put a great amount of them, which I've greatly, greatly struggled with.
Because I'm redoing things that I've already done, meaning that I couldn't spend time answering
The questions that people have come up with, like, for instance, Holly. I remember you asked me a question, either last week or week before last. So it may have been two weeks ago, yikes.
That you would ask a question and I still remember it. I still remember I need to answer all the questions because it was a good question that everyone needs to
That we all can benefit from and and and private questions that people have asked me in their
In their sessions with me. I wanted to answer those in the group as well. Now, not telling anybody, you know, obviously who asked the question, but just the fact that everyone could benefit from the answer.
And I have not been able to get to any of those because I'm trying to make sure that anybody who's coming into the intensive has
Everything they need when they need it. And I'm like down found myself down to the wire in making sure that they have everything that they
That they need from me in order to complete the things that they committed to, which are things like watching certain number, not a certain number, but
Certain teachings by a certain time, you know, when first week, etc. So finally, the Lord. I was just really, really struggling
For the past. I don't know. I guess it's been two weeks at two, three weeks, something like that. And I was just talking to the Lord about it and you just showed me Ashley, you're, you're doing it again.
You're doing what you've done for literally decades, which is you figure out what is the hardest path for you to walk and you determine that that was the righteous one.
Hey there. Sorry about that. Okay, so I'm apparently my zoom kicked me off.
It does that every now and then. So we're back. Anyway, so he would just reminded me, actually, you know, you in the past you to you take the hardest path and you determine what's the right path.
You, you determine that by which one's the hardest. And so instead of just asking everyone
Hey, what would y'all think about if I transferred over some of the lives in the Q AMP. A's because then I would be able to have, I would be able to use the lives that I use for y'all's teaching
I would just already I would be able to hit the ground running and be able to have everything set up and then just be able to continue by adding by being able to spend my time answering
New questions. In other words, going into more advanced teaching instead of just just instead of recovering old material.
And I just didn't want to ask. I didn't want to ask that of y'all. I made an assumption on my part that y'all and that I didn't want to put y'all in a position where you might want to say no, but didn't feel
Didn't feel that you could. And so the problem with that is I'm taking on the burden of a responsibility that should be someone else's
It's someone else's right to make a decision for their own life and I have taken that on and it is seen as a it's seen as a selfless thing.
It is seen as a righteous thing according to the world and it's wrong. It's flat out wrong. It's wrong. And quite honestly, it's disrespectful. It's disrespectful for us to
And for us to assume that someone else cannot make that kind of a decision for themselves and be able to draw a healthy boundary for themselves, etc. And so I
I took on I assumed something and I decided I didn't want to ask. And that's, and that's not, it's not an appropriate way to interact in a relationship, whether it's, you know, whether it's a client relationship or a spouse relationship or even children relationship with children.
So, and then it ends up taking them what we end up doing a lot of times people as you know as moms have a very difficult
Time with that we end up taking on things for our children or our spouses that don't belong to us. And we think that it's selfless and it's actually disrespectful.
Because we're making decisions for other people think about, for instance, if someone is making a decision for like, say, for instance, you've got a couple that aren't married and one of them believes that they are holding someone else back by
By not expressing their feelings and the fact that they really truly love someone because they feel that, oh, if I let them know how much I love them. And if I asked them to marry me or whatever.
That were if I show them how much I care that they're going to feel the pressure
Or and then they're going to end up making a decision that wouldn't serve them in the long run, because in the long run, it would have been better.
If I let him go to college and do this or let him pursue this career, etc. And it's actually being very disrespectful to not allow someone else to make the decision for their lives.
So anyway, I realized that that's what I did. And I mean, nobody's meaning to be disrespectful. No one's meaning to do it that way. You know, you're trying to do it in a way in trying to
I'm trying to carry something for someone else so that you can relieve someone else of the pressure so that you can protect someone
What we end up doing is we end up protecting them from their right to make their own decision and and all of that so
And it wasn't anything that I was trying to do to anybody. I was ending up just making it harder on myself is what I was doing instead of asking y'all. I was like, I don't want to ask
So I thought, I will just, I will just redo all of that redo all the teachings and I realized, oh my word. I've just been under a tremendous amount of pressure.
And I didn't allow myself and I couldn't seem to find a place of rest and the Lord was was used it in my life to reveal to me.
Ashley, you are you're taking you're making things too hard on yourself. I provided an opportunity for you and you didn't take it.
And you try to judge more righteously than God.
And so anyway, I just wanted to say there's nothing wrong with like if y'all at all said, hey, look, you know,
No, thanks for just not and you know we prefer to keep that private. There's nothing wrong with that. The problem is I made the decision.
And anyway, nothing wrong with making a decision. It's not, I wasn't like doing anything mean to y'all.
But I was making it harder myself and I wasn't allowing
Other people to make that decision in their own lives, which increases the health of a relationship.
If, if people can be transparent with one another. And so then I ended up creating a whole bunch of trouble for myself and the Lord used it to say, hey, actually, you know,
This, this is you need to operate more from a place of rest and you can't seem to find rest. You made the wrong, not the wrong decision, but you that you
You started this struggle way back here way back to three weeks ago, whenever that was
And anyway, so I just wanted to let y'all know. And that is something that I learned and I learned it. I think last night I was processing this with a friend of mine. It's like
She asked me, well, actually, what do you think is triggered the fact that you are that you can't seem to get into get get into a place of rest.
I said, you know what, it's, it's not a new thing. It's been going on for a few weeks. And as I was trying to explain to her my situation. All of a sudden, I answered my own question.
I was like, I know what's going on. So, and it's like, I know now what to do. So then I reached out to all of y'all and obey the Lord. And anyway, so we're all still learning
We can take greater and greater measures of rest and discovering where it is that we think that we're standing in our identity. We think that we're standing in rest and then we end up into realizing that we're not so
Um, so I just thought, I hope, I hope that that would be helpful. And another thing that I wanted to mention was and to just remind everybody that
And because it was just something that started coming up in some of my client sessions. I just wanted to remind everyone that that
The reason that we're all on this journey is because wherever we are because all of us are in different levels of this journey.
We're the, the reason why we're attracted to this message that we're hearing from the Lord. The reason that I'm attracted to it. The reason that y'all were attracted to it and you decided to jump into it with the Lord.
Is the fact that whatever you've been doing so far is not allowing you to manifest what
It is that you want to manifest in your life like a certain level of peace or a certain level of rest or moving into greater understanding of X, Y, and Z.
And all of us are at different levels in that. But the reason that we're here is because there's something that we want that whatever we're doing so far and whatever perspective in which we have approached the Lord so far is
has served us by allowing us to get to this point, but it's not allowing us to move past this point. And that means that there's something that we're not
that we're not understanding or we're not meaning that we're not believing about the Lord. And so I just want to encourage us all, because I have to do the same thing,
that
to, I just want to encourage us that to leave whatever it is that we've been doing and how it's worked in the past and leave it, leave it at the door.
And understand that the new things that the Lord moves us into and the new revelations
are going to be just that. They're going to be new and we're not going to sometimes understand how to reconcile them with what it is that we've done so far.
Because we believed certain things. And now it's like, well, wait a minute. These are just, these are new things. And I'm not sure how that reconciles with this. Exactly.
Exactly. That served us to this point. And so it no longer serves us beyond this point. And so we now have to
we now have to leave certain things at the door and understand that there are things that we are going to struggle in trying to reconcile.
And think about like a, like the fact that when you're talking to a two year old, you have to talk in very black and white terms.
To the point where if a 55 year old, I don't know why I'm picking this two ages. I'm always talking about two year olds and 55 year old, but you know 55 year old can
if they hear someone talking to a two year old and they don't know that someone, they hear someone in another room talking to a two year old, but they don't know that they're talking to a two year old, they just hear somebody talking
And they hear them giving instruction. Well, then the 55 year old is going, that's not accurate. That's not right. That's not accounting for all of these situations.
But then when they walk in the room and they realize, oh, well, they're just talking to a two year old.
All of this sudden what the person was saying makes sense because you can only talk to the two year old in certain terms.
And you can't reveal everything to them. So one of the struggles that we have when we're moving from two to five to 10 to 15 or whatever.
Is there are things that we used to believe were true that served us to getting to that age that allowed us to operate and function and successfully at that point.
That we now have to leave in order to move beyond that point in order to move from 10 years old into a teenager.
There are things that we thought were true that we're now understanding that we kind of have to really shift our perspective and how to view that truth in order to progress further and
And so that was just something that I've been thinking about in some of the sessions that have been with various various people because, you know, I'm in sessions with them with y'all and then and then one on one client.
That I was just talking and I was realizing it kept this idea kept coming up where people are frustrated if something doesn't is something new doesn't reconcile
And they keep expecting it to it won't always. Now, nothing will contract should contradict the Bible.
But just know that what we have learned this far is like what a two year old knows or what a five year old knows
Very black can see life is very black and white terms that we have to be willing to mold and expand
What we used to believe about something as as true and now understand what it's going to look very, very different. It means that it's going to take on a lot more color, a lot more depth.
But we are going to struggle with trying to reconcile some of it because we in the past, we understood in part. So now what we're trying to do is according to First Corinthians is we're trying to
Then for now I know in part, but then shall I know even is also I have known. In other words, that we're actually going to come into a greater and greater fullness of what it means to look truth and God in the face.
As opposed to being seen through a glass darkly well well it looks like this and it looks like that.
Well, when we come face to face with the thing which if we come to sharply face to face with thing we reject it because it's too overwhelming.
And we don't know how to consume it. So God has to slowly progress us from viewing something as a shadow, which is 2D distorted image into the actual 3D.
Technicolor version where if we go too fast is
loads our senses and we don't know how to consume it and we don't have a grip for it.
God traverses us through that process and that means that we need to be open to experiencing
new and receiving new revelations of him in that thinking of realizing that we're going
to traverse our understanding and our change of perception of what is truth in a very similar
fashion.
We're like, wait a minute, this doesn't reconcile because if you look at the end, the 3D Technicolor
version and compare it to what we used to always know is the shadow and the 2D version
and the distorted version, we don't even understand how that could possibly, you know, how you
could have even gotten the shadow from the Technicolor version because they're just so,
so very different.
So anyway, I just wanted to encourage us in that we'll be able, I've noticed that those
who shift faster are those who are willing to let go of those old mindsets more readily,
who allow themselves to be more vulnerable.
They're the ones who, when I've worked with, when I've interacted with them, they shift
10 times faster than everyone else, 10 times faster.
I've watched it repeatedly.
I've watched it in my own life.
I watched it in other people's lives.
So anyway, just wanted to encourage everybody in that.
Don't know who needed to hear that.
Maybe it was just me.
So does anyone have anything that they wanted to start out with?
Oh, I've got some chats.
Did somebody, we can call it the Martyrdom Syndrome.
Yes.
I don't need another.
We don't need another Jesus.
Leave me alone.
Love it.
That's really good.
Alright, so did anyone have any questions?
Because those were two things that I thought about today that I thought, well, everyone
thinks of their questions.
We'll start out with those things.
So is this a night I'm just going to hear myself talk?
I can do that.
I could, I can go on for a long time.
Or does anyone have anything that maybe they were, I don't know, thinking about this week
or that the Lord has been revealing to them or a way in which they felt a breakthrough
perhaps.
They began to see how they were operating in rest and in greater measure or in a different
area that they hadn't thought of applying it in and the Lord just revealed that.
Anybody have anything?
I appreciate it.
Yeah, I appreciate your, y'all's posts.
Several of y'all made posts today.
And I think the most recent one was Amy's.
I, as she was telling me about something and I encouraged her, oh my word, you're going
to put that on Facebook.
So appreciate y'all taking the time to do that and encourage one another.
I can share a little bit about what we talked about today, Ashley, and in our one-on-one
consultation about just recognizing old patterns of the way I react to certain situations.
Not with other people, just decisions about my own life.
And I would brush it off saying, oh, that's just a formula.
God's going to fix this for me.
It's kind of like the guy sitting on his roof, you know, praying for, you know, it's
flooding and the floods coming up higher and he's praying for God to send, you know, to
rescue him.
And a boat comes along and he says, no, no, no, God's going to rescue me.
And then, and then another boat, you go, no, no, no, God's going to rescue me.
And then the helicopter.
And he says, no, no, no, God's going to rescue me.
And he gets, you know, he drowns and goes to heaven and he says, why didn't you rescue
me?
And he said, I sent two boats and a helicopter.
So I would typically see those boats as no, no, no, no, no, God's going to rescue me.
And so in talking to it, and then it was just like that, that situation came up again.
And I was like, when I, when I kind of went to brush it aside going, no, no, no, no, God's
going to rescue me.
And there was kind of a check in my spirit.
And it was kind of like the Lord was saying, pay attention.
And I thought exactly what you said, Ashley.
I thought, you know what, this problem has been around for many years.
And I've always had this attitude, and it hasn't served me.
And so I thought maybe I need to reconsider my response.
to the boat and so I talked to Ashley about it today
and you know it's kind of like you said even while you're talking
you figure it out for yourself like I was acting like a spoiled two-year-old
that just wanted you know daddy to make everything
better and I didn't want to grow up and you know
co-labor with him and be part of the solution
and so um that was real eye-opening for me
and just confirmed it wasn't yeah I mean it was really um really
because you know I always say you know God doesn't
uh raise spoiled children you know that he
he wants us to be responsible and grow up
and I was acting like a spoiled child in this area
for a very long time so anyway that was um that was really good
that helped me to I really feel like that kind of opened a window
of understanding in me and shifted me to a new perspective
to see myself in the way that you know that I always think we should be even
though it's hard to see yourself sometimes
but I was able to see and it was it was you know I could feel the Lord just go
wait a minute wait a minute this is your typical
response is that that been serving you
so that was good that was really good yeah good I'm glad I'm glad that you
brought that up um so um what what um Amy and I were
talking about is the fact that when God presents a worldly solution we
tend to we tend to write it off oh well that's
a worldly solution it's that's got to be of the body or of
the soul and that's just can't be it can't be just or right and and no
God works with it what he doesn't want us to do
is to think that that's what's that that is our solution in other words that that
is the thing that will provide for us he wants us to rely on him
to provide for us and just enjoy the journey of going
through the actions like with our business to understand
that he's the source of our clients he's the source of our profits and yet
we still do the activities of business why
not to get the result anymore because that's what the world does the world
thinks that it's everything that they're doing that's actually creating the
result but instead God's like no no I still want you to do the activities of
business but it's because I want to I want you
to co-labor with me and and join with me on um in
in in uh kind of like dancing together let's just enjoy doing this
together let's enjoy doing the activity it's not what's going to create the
result because me me the Lord's saying the Lord's saying
you know me as God I'm the one who's providing the result
but I want to do the activities together and I want us to
enjoy doing something together it's like dancing together
or going on a picnic together or whatever it's
you're just you're just enjoying one another's company
only you're actually doing work you're doing
business related activities or you're washing dishes
or you're cleaning the house it's doing it together with God
because we're we're maturing in our spiritual walk and relationship with
him enough that we're collaborating with him as
opposed to being a two-year-old who's made a mess and isn't big enough
to clean the mess that he's made say for instance he breaks the vase
when he breaks the vase there's glass all over the floor you don't have your
two-year-old help you you know he's not he can't do that yet
so but he's just he's the one who created the mess right
so you're just like okay you know just make sure that he is in a safe spot
and then you clean up the mess but when you're 55
you clean up the mess your mom doesn't send you to your room so that she cleans
up the mess she's like no let's let's do this together
like for instance you know if your husband breaks something or your wife
breaks something you know um well everybody on this calls
a calls a a wife so we'll just go with that so
your your husband breaks something or you break something and y'all clean it
up together right it's just why either one of you
has the ability to do it by yourselves and yet god's like
hey you know i want to do stuff together with you you know just like
just like a spouse let's just do this together why for the purpose of doing it
together we're just doing the activity we're
spending time we're co-laboring it's our spirit you know flowing um flowing
together with his spirit and everything's undulating in a in an
ever-flowing dance so that's what um what amy and i were talking about today
is um understanding when god is as we grow in our spiritual maturity
god is providing us opportunities to co-labor with him
but it's not working for a result we're not working for our own result
was that a prophetic statement about me
No, hey, look, the Lord wants to take that. I will be one day. The Lord did tell me I was going to marry one day. That was like 10 years ago. So I was like, at least I know that you didn't tell me when. So that's really cute.
Anyway, so that's what Amy and I were talking about. And so I'm really glad that you brought that up, Amy, because that I figured that that would be, you know, because it's very helpful. I would imagine to all of us to understand
that to not disregard a solution that we are used to viewing as worldly and thinking that it's unspiritual. Our God created everything, therefore everything's spiritual.
The thing that we're talking about in making sure that we operate out of our identity is making sure that we understand the results always come from God.
And we need to allow all of the results to come from God, instead of trying to create the results ourselves.
And we need to rely on Him as the source by operating out of the tree of life, instead of insisting on doing everything out of our own strength and power and creating our own results by operating according to the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, because we know
the good things that we're supposed to do and the bad things we're supposed to avoid. Again, the problem with that is you have to know both good and evil in order to know what to do in order to know what to avoid.
And in the spirit, you don't have to, you don't have to know those things. So anyway, but thanks for bringing that up. Appreciate it. That's a good thought.
Yeah, you're welcome.
I think I just see. Oh, Priscilla's on now. Hey, Priscilla. How you doing? I always like to say hi to everybody. Hey. Hey, I'm good. How are you? Doing good. Good.
So does anyone have anything else?
You may not want to leave me alone to talk because I could fill the time.
I think that y'all hear enough of it already on the line.
So anybody else have anything that happened this week, or any breakthrough that they felt
and that the Lord gave them.
Anything at all, any?
Well, I posted it on the Facebook just right before, I don't know if y'all saw it, but I have really not been working because I haven't felt, I work for a company, but I'm 100% commission, and I have to find all my own clients.
And so, a lot like y'all do your oil businesses and stuff like that, and all the different things so.
But I hadn't felt compelled to do anything for the last couple of weeks.
So I hadn't been, I mean, my days were full, my daughter's home, and my son's home obviously from school, and we've been busy.
But I've just been taking each day as it comes, and I hadn't been doing anything to drum up any business.
And I had two people today just really believing that God, and knowing that He brings me what I need when I need it.
And I had recognized that before I started this intensive, but you still feel like you should be doing something, right?
So, but God was always faithful.
And so I had a measure of that working before this.
But anyway, so I haven't been doing anything for at least two weeks, if not more.
And today I had two random people reach out to me asking for my services.
And that's a lot, you know, I don't get two people a day.
And so yeah, they were both referrals.
And so yeah, but I didn't, I had never contacted them or anything, done anything to, to connect with them.
They just had gotten my number from people that knew what I did and reached out to me.
So that was really neat.
I was like, okay, well, I guess I'm going to work for a couple days now.
But it's just really cool just to, just to flow with God and not stress over it.
And it's been really, it's been really nice.
Yeah, good.
Yeah, that's exciting to hear.
And then y'all, I know that y'all have talked, y'all have talked, y'all heard Cheryl's introduction live talking about how she had, how she and I talked a few months ago.
I don't know if it was, I don't remember what month it was.
Anyway, a while back, and it was before the April Intensive, and I told her, I said, it
kind of offhandedly, I said, hey, by the way, Cheryl, you know, I was encouraging her in
something.
And I said, you do know that God can provide for a business in all kinds of ways, and he
can do it in network marketing, even without people.
And she's like, really, how does that work?
And I told her, I said, I don't know.
All I know is it works.
In other words, I don't know the how, because I just know that with God, all things are
possible. And so it was one of those things where I said in my spirit, and I didn't know
until I said it, you know, I've told you many times, I go back and I listen to my own
teachings, because then I'm like, I learned things.
Because if I'm just flowing in the spirit, I'm saying things I didn't know, I knew, and
then I go back and listen to and I'm like, oh, my word, I didn't know that.
So I start implementing them in my own life, because I don't I've never articulated
certain ways in which my spirit flows.
And sometimes you just go by the flow of your spirit.
And then someone asks you, well, how do you do that?
And you think, I don't know.
I just I don't know.
I just I just know it and I just do it.
And they'll ask me to explain it.
And I don't know.
I don't know how to explain it.
I don't know how to articulate it.
So when I'm just flowing in the spirit, the spirit articulates it.
And then my conscious begins to be able to consume it in the way that it understands.
So it's really, really fascinating.
So that was just one of the moments I just kind of like drop this this whole thing.
And I said, oh, by the way, did you know that God can create can can build your business
without people? So so she went to and she talks about this, obviously.
In her introduction, she she went to the Lord and said, Lord, I'd really like to see that.
I'd really like to see your character manifest in that way.
And so sure enough, I don't even remember how fast it was.
It was within it was within a week or two.
And it may have been within days that the Lord did it.
All of a sudden, she just had these things just come drop in her lap.
And she's thinking it's so she she messaged me.
She said, oh, my goodness, actually, it's true.
And I thought, well, I want to know, you know, how did that work?
I did. In other words, like how did it manifest?
And so she explained it.
I just thought that is so neat.
It was just something that I knew of God.
And I just and he'll manifest in different ways depending on the situation and the people.
But anyway, it's really exciting.
And so you're in your story, Amy, you know, about how we're just just without us, without
us laboring, we're just supposed to and meaning like working for it.
We're thinking like, well, we're the ones who are actually creating the results, bringing
the clients, doing all the activities that actually, you know, X plus Y equals Z, you
know. And so we think that if we remove the Y, then X plus nothing doesn't equal Z
anymore. And God's like, no, it'll still equal Z because I make it equal Z because that
isn't because he's like, OK, look, we're not going to operate according to the formula
anymore. We're going to operate according to the fact that I'm a good father and I'm
going to give you gifts.
But in order for you to be able to receive gifts, you have to be able to release the
resistance that the state of resistance that we're in to receiving the gift.
And once we release that, well, then it brings it then we're able to receive the gift.
If we insist on staying in a state of resistance because we just can't believe that God's
as good as he says that he is, then not understanding that we're intentionally staying in
a state of resistance, understand, because nobody on this call in, you know,
intentionally is resisting against that, understands that what it is that we're doing is
intentionally resisting God.
We're in a state of self-preservation, self-protection, self-provision and
anyway, and trying to create our own our own sense of an identity.
But anyway, if we're in that state, if we insist on staying in the state of resistance,
even if it's unintentional, it means that we're insisting on that.
We're like, I'll do it myself.
I'm going to follow this formula.
I'm going to sense it. I'm going to insist it.
The X plus Y equals Z.
Anyway, there you go.
So any.
Thing else.
I wanted to cover.
Am I going to have to start coming to the calls with material?
OK, I'll say something, Ashley.
How's that? Yeah, great, Holly.
OK, so I think it was two weeks ago it was.
the Friday before Mother's Day, I had a big job to do for a florist in town and I decorated
like their whole building and stuff like that. And the small businesses, I live in like,
like a triangle of small towns and the local business loyalty is very strong. And I think
most of the local businesses are doing pretty good even in the middle of the shutdown. But
they've all taken, of course, major, major hits just from being closed. And so I did this
florist shop. And we're I'm in North Carolina. So a lot of things are reopening like last weekend.
And I think so from that florist job two weeks ago, and I put this in a post that I made today,
I got 20 jobs within 48 hours. And I was excited, but I do not like to be busy. Like that is not my
natural like thing. But I just I left this part out of my post because I was like, how long am
I going to make this post? But my husband Frank and I had asked the Lord for more provision for
this new little business that we're starting. We're, we're, we're redoing a horse trailer and
we're making it like a shaved ice trailer. So it's just going to be like extra income.
Like it for spring and summer. It's not like a, it's not like a whole big thing. And we're going
to get a manager and somebody else is going to take care of it. And that kind of thing is he has
a full time job and we have two wild Indians for children and stuff like that. So but so we had
asked for more provision for this. So all of these jobs came in and a lot of them were last minute
and a few of them were large. And one of them was for a company downtown that has been on like
shark tank and they have like 30,000 Instagram followers and I'm like nobody from nowhere. So I
was like, I was jumping up and down in the living room, but then it like set in and I was like,
oh shoot. So I was so stressed all week, but I kept telling myself an old thought process of,
well, I asked for this. I asked for this provision and he has provided it for us.
And so like, suck it up buttercup. Cause like you talked about Amy, like I'm not a two-year-old
and I can work hard and I'm not going to have a fit in the middle of a pandemic when nobody has a
job and I have more than enough and I'm going to sit here and whine about it. No, hush and get to
work. But it like did not serve me well. And I was like, so stressed. I told Eric, I was like,
I can feel the cortisol levels in my brain. And I did not even know that was a thing, but I read
an article about it and I'm telling you, it's real. I can like, I can feel it. It's not healthy.
So like this whole thing and I would be like driving in the car, like, God, where is my
peace? Where is my rest? Like, I'm not going to work for it, but like, what do I do right now?
Because I'm, this is, this is just way too much. And, and of course I said yes to every job and
I really have strong boundaries and I don't have a problem saying no, but again, like I
asked for this. And so, um, a couple of nights I was just so frazzled. I went to bed and,
um, just was like, soul, you need to rest. You're safe. And like, spirit,
turn your face towards heaven and receive all that you can like in the next three hours that
you get to sleep or whatever it was. And, um, I don't know what shifted for me, but I had,
so last week I had one or two jobs every day and this week I had two or three jobs every day.
And I have not, I've had tons of peace this week and I've not been stressed and,
and it's different. Um, like the jobs are a little different like here and there. And so
that could be it. I don't have like anybody famous I'm doing anything for.
Um, but I just had so much peace and I'm not even really sure what the shift is. I think it just,
I think the Lord just did it supernaturally in my spirit, but I've had all kinds of hangups with
provision and a poverty mentality and like condemnation over finances. I mean, like that is,
has been a rough spot for me in my life. And, um, I don't know, I don't exactly know, but I'm
so grateful because I can feel that there's been a shift, but I have no words or revel
necessarily like revelation for it, except that this week I've been able to work hard
and my attitude has been.
what do they say, an attitude of gratitude or whatever.
And I felt a lot better about it,
but there has been just as much circumstantially.
And I think even the shift last week
that I don't even know what it was,
has really opened up for the Lord.
I shared this in my post,
like there's been some stuff in our marriage,
like old stuff that has like sort of reared its head.
And that the Lord has said, like, you need to grieve this.
Like you need to, like this idea that you had,
and not about our whole marriage,
but like just about this set, this spot,
like this is dead, it is in the ground.
And you're like out there with a shovel.
Like, I just need to see the corpse.
I just need to see it to make sure it's dead
before I move on.
I'm a very loyal person.
And like, you know, and I feel like the Lord is like,
you about to get scarred if you see this, you know,
like do not go here.
This thing is dead.
Like just grieve it and move on.
Like give yourself some time to grieve and to be sad
and to move on.
And I think whatever shift happened last week
with my mentality of work and provision and whatever.
And I did feel the Lord tell me a little bit like,
I set a buffet in front of you and you ate it all.
And that's not what I was going for.
I just, you asked for more provision.
I was like, take your pick.
And you ate the whole buffet.
And I'm like, well, that sounds like me.
I am always hungry, but.
I don't know if Ashley,
I don't know if we shared any meals in college,
but I could pack, I don't know what it is.
I can pack it away.
But.
In fact, one of my favorite memories of you
is I had to do it for tea one day.
Do you remember?
Yes, I do.
Anyway, sorry, go ahead.
No, you tell, you can tell it.
I'm sure I ate all the cookies that there were.
I probably left none for anyone.
Oh, yeah, for those of y'all who don't know,
Holly is a very beautiful woman inside and out.
And she's been in many beauty pageants and everything.
So no, I.
Yeah, because I was poor
and I needed to put myself through college.
That's why I was doing beauty pageants.
She was very good at it, everyone.
Oh my gosh, oh my gosh.
No, no, she always had very healthy eating habits,
much more than I did.
Oh my word, I had so much weight on in college.
But anyway, so back to your thoughts and how you do it.
So funny, that's so funny.
Anyway, I feel like whatever shift I had,
like in the work mentality
and whatever has somehow manifested this weekend,
just more peace and that kind of a thing.
But I feel like it left room in my soul
to deal with other junk that the Lord was like,
we need to deal with this.
We need to talk about this.
But there's room for it now
because I'm not just like so focused
on working in that condition.
So those are big shifts
because I didn't know how deep they were.
And I'm just trusting the Lord
that like this marriage stuff will be really,
we're not like in a crisis mode,
but you know how like stuff pops up
and you're like, oh, that again?
And so I think that's where, thank you.
See, I know you know, thank you.
And sometimes I wonder, like, I'm like,
this is gonna be the thing that does it in.
This thing, you know, but I feel like the Lord's like,
no, this thing is dead.
You're the only one that doesn't realize it.
Anyway, so it's been a good week,
but it's also, I don't know.
And I like to journal
and I like to understand what the Lord is doing
and I wanna like meditate on it.
Like it's a big, I'm very sentimental
and like that's all a big deal for me.
And I'm wondering in like this season of freedom
and then the new business opening
and what that's gonna take if the Lord is like,
like we need to bypass some of your monuments
and some of your milestones
and just like do the finished work of Christ
and let it manifest so that you can
start really walking in it
and not be growing and operating at the same time.
So I don't know, it's interesting.
Yeah, that's really good.
And I like the point that you bring up,
you know, the fact that old things wear their ugly heads
that we think that we've already dealt with.
And often what it can be is the way that we dealt with them,
dealt with them to a certain extent,
but it didn't finish it
because we weren't in a place of rest yet.
So therefore, okay, now that we're talking about rest,
okay, now everything that you did,
you got to a certain point and he's like,
but I need to push it past to that other point,
which is just healthy where we just receive it as a gift
and allows the thing to finally truly die
because the death that we did in it,
we had to work.
And God's like, okay, but that in itself leads to death and therefore it doesn't provide
a finished work.
So I think that that's absolutely fascinating what you thought it, where you said, you know,
that you felt that God was like bringing back, like taking you past certain monuments and
certain milestones.
And then, you know, I have heard this from people repeatedly.
And I tell the, I tell people the same thing when they, when they ask me about my own experience
is it's true.
We're just like, well, I, I've heard so many times, I don't know how it happened.
I don't know how it happened.
I mean, that's, that's the thing is we think that I grew up in church and I, and I, and
I say that, you know, trying to not, not put it on other people, but I assume that most
other people have, have walked through this as well, where we were taught and we all believed
in the people who taught us, they were taught that and the people who, you know, said that
et cetera, that we have to understand, and we have to know, and we have to consume, and
we have to be able to articulate something in order for it to be real.
And in order for us to actually shift, and we don't, that's the other thing about the
gift is that it's just a gift and we don't have to understand how it happened or, or
whatever.
And we want to create kind of like a formula out of it and like, oh, how can I do this
again in another area?
And it was like, I was like, no, no, no, you don't have to know.
And it can, so it's really strange for things to happen where we're like, I don't know how
that happened.
I didn't know how I shifted.
I don't know what it is I did.
I don't know what it is that I believed.
I know that God supernaturally did it, but I don't really know what it is that I did
to instigate the supernatural work.
And it's, and it's exciting.
And that's part of the rest is it's just like, you know, we just, we just believe the Lord
and we believe his character and he comes in and does stuff and we tell our spirit,
hey spirit, you know, you know, all things.
And so you come in and do the work and then it's when our spirit is doing the work or
after it's done the work that our soul can look in on it and, and go, huh.
So that's how you do it.
So we didn't have to know it beforehand and we don't even have to know it during.
And so anyway, that's always, that's always personally very exciting for me, um, to just
watch myself shift and like, I don't even know how that happened, but yeah, that's really
great.
It's exciting.
And like I mentioned, you know, as a comment on your post, it, um, you know, you're really
taking the journey, you know, everything, you know, that y'all all talk about the things
that you mentioned about, oh, I did this, I did this, and then this happened.
I don't mean did as in work, but yeah, this is the process that I went through.
And then this is how it manifested is it's wonderful to hear because it's, it's encouraging
to me that it's like, oh, they get it.
They're actually doing it because the spirit is grabbing a hold of it and, and taking them
seriously and then walking, walking y'all through it, um, as a, and so it gives me encouragement
to know that, uh, uh, that I don't know, you know, that it's not just all something
that, that the, in other words, that, that y'all are serious and, you know, just like
I'm serious with the Lord and we're just, we're just really, truly doing this together
as opposed to just, I don't know, wanting something to be true, but not willing to,
um, actually, um, take it seriously before the Lord and actually shift.
In other words, that we think in other, in other words, actually seeing that we're applying
it as opposed to simply listening to teachings, kind of like we listened to a pastor and we
all leave church thinking I've got it now.
I got it.
Right.
The same.
Yeah.
We're the same by lunch.
Yeah.
So, but to see, so y'all's testimonies are wonderful to hear because I'm like, okay,
they really are getting it to enough to be able to sink their teeth into where the Lord
sees, okay, they are taking it seriously.
Therefore, I will collaborate with them and we will, we will move them into a place of
rest.
So it's wonderful.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Thank you, Holly.
Appreciate it.
Well, it is, it's been an hour.
It's nine our time, 10 y'all's.
Does anyone have any last thing before we jump off?
Let's see if I'm missing any fun stuff in the chat.
I'm still laughing about, about yours, Holly, that you shout, I don't need another Jesus
sleeve.
Yeah.
Both Frank and I, like, I'll be like, well, I just went ahead and, you know, ordered
you these or, you know, dah, dah.
And he'll be like, I can, I got it.
I can order my own jeans.
It's fine.
All right.
You know, and I'm like, I'm just trying to help.
And he'd be like, I don't need another Jesus.
Stop martyring yourself.
And so we do it back and forth to each other
because my mother-in-law, who is wonderful to,
who said this?
I feel like somebody else said this, maybe not.
But I don't know if you guys see the Enneagram,
but she is like a full-fledged two on the Enneagram.
So all she wants to do is please you and make you happy
and make your decisions for you
so you don't have to think or whatever.
And so then when Frank and I got married,
he'd be like, well, I set my dish
right next to the dishwasher.
And I'd be like, time me, ready?
One, two, there it is.
See, you could do it yourself.
Like, how, why would I do this for you?
Like, anyway, so we, yes, yes, thank you.
And so we joke about stuff like that,
but every once in a while,
because his parents live an hour away,
he'll be like, let's ask my mom to do it.
And I'll be like, no, no,
we cannot take advantage of her martyr syndrome
to do this for everybody.
Like, this is not healthy.
And so, I don't know.
So it really runs deep in his family because my family,
I mean, I remember getting spanked
for not putting dishes in the dishwasher,
like in elementary school.
I remember my dad being like,
why would you ask your mother?
It's so funny.
Why would you ask your mother
to touch something you ate off of?
You put it in the dishwasher yourself.
Which I have never heard anybody else's family
say something like that.
But now, my kids will be like,
you left it in the sink.
My six year old, not my two year old,
because I don't want him touching anything.
But like, my six year old will be like,
you left it in the sink.
And I'm like, you ate off of this.
Listen to me.
We love and respect one another.
Your spit touches something.
You handle it yourself.
Like, I don't, mm-mm.
He's like, this will take everywhere.
Is I think we're, I think everyone thinks
that we're insane, but it's like,
we might be, it's good.
I feel like a fun family to me.
Yeah, yes.
Fun and loud.
Here we are.
Yeah.
Man, I thought that was funny.
It's like, I don't need another Jesus.
That's pretty cute.
Yeah.
All right, you're using it.
Yeah, so you're starting to trend, Tali.
Priscilla says she's gonna use that one with her kids.
Okay, yeah.
Yeah.
By the way, Priscilla, that was a really cute post
that you posted on your personal profile today
about where you left Montgomery to not eat the ice cream.
So I used it for both of you.
And then you had to announce to everybody,
by the way, there's, what is it called?
There's a one-boy humor in it,
or I don't remember what you said.
Yeah, graphic language.
Yeah, it's one-boy graphic language.
And I was like, what does this mean?
And then I listened to it and I'm like,
that graphic language, yeah.
Yes.
It's a great moment to post that.
When you have kids like mine, you just,
you don't pretend like you have it all together
because they make sure that everyone knows
that it's not true.
I'm with you, Priscilla.
I always tell people like, I really love Jesus,
but after I had my second child, I was like,
now I swear, I'm so free, I swear now.
I'm so free, I swear now.
Oh, like, not really.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm not like a sailor, but every once in a while,
like it slips and I'm like, well,
I guess I felt free in Jesus to do that.
Yeah, don't ask me why, but both my kids are still up.
It's like, they know.
They know when we have these lives,
there's something internally.
They have a shift in the wrong direction
and they just don't, so.
They feel the presence of the Lord and they wanna be it.
That's what we do.
No, I think that's the thing.
Like, if I wake up early to read or to do something like
that, it's like my kids' spirits wake up
and they're like, something's happening.
We have to, and I'm like, it's Jesus.
It's Jesus, you feel.
Leave me alone.
Same story, different house.
Yes!
Ah!
Well, good to see all of y'all.
I will, I'll be posting some new teachings and stuff
now that I'm transferring the old lives over.
I'm gonna use those teachings, just chop them up
and then put them into the, into the,
and then I'll be able to focus more of my lives on,
instead of the core teachings,
I'll be able to focus my lives on the,
on like,
good to see all of y'all.
Y'all have a good night.
Bye.