Hey, Amy.
Who is that?
It's Ashley.
How you doing?
Oh, hey.
Hey.
I'm good.
I was out here walking and I thought it was a neighbor calling at me.
Oh, how fun.
It's me.
How are you?
I'm good.
I'm trying to make sure I position this in such a way y'all can see my face.
It looks like you're in a cabin.
Are you still at Cedar Creek or whatever it's called?
Yes, I am.
So, yeah, so the conference ended Tuesday.
Yeah, so it ended Tuesday.
So Chris and a group of friends and I are all just hanging out until Sunday.
Oh, my gosh.
Are you having so much fun?
Yes, I am.
It's a lot of fun.
Yeah.
That's amazing.
Yes, made some good friends.
I bet.
So, yeah.
So did you listen to any of it online?
No, I wasn't able to sign up.
I couldn't afford to even do the streaming, so I wasn't.
It was like $150 just to do that.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Okay.
Yeah, and once I paid the bills, I was like, well, I guess we'll catch it next time around.
Or maybe it will be posted, you know, but yeah, tell me what you, what did you get out
of it?
I mean, I know there's probably a lot, but you know, well, it was just manifesting who
it is that we are in the spirit down into the body, but various ways from which we can,
various ways that we can like do biohacking, basically where you're using specific tools
in the, in the physical realm to, and, and, and to, and, and to help us understand the
connection between the spirit realm in the body, in the fact of like, the fact that we
are unified, it's body, soul, and spirit.
And so therefore things that we do in the body can affect, can affect our, can affect
our awareness of the spirit and stuff like that.
I think that Alana joined us.
Oh, wow.
We've got all kinds of people on here, Alana, Elizabeth, Steph, hey, everybody.
Cool.
Oh, there they all are.
I was on the wrong screen.
So I couldn't see everybody.
I just thought it was, I just thought it was Amy and I.
I'm looking at, I wasn't looking at the gallery version.
So I hope everybody's doing good.
Sorry that we weren't able to meet last week.
I was trying really hard and it just wasn't meant to be.
So anyway, but I left all of my friends over at the lodge to come to my cabin to, to get
to visit with all of y'all and then I'll go back over there and have dinner with them.
So did anyone have anything they wanted to start out with?
Anything that they've been thinking about or going through and any questions or anything?
Can I ask a really like kind of weird question?
Sure.
Okay.
So I'm a singer and I will, this is not like a self-deprecating thing, but I know that
I am the least talented singer on my worship team.
And that's okay because I've been a new singer and that's okay.
And how can I manifest my, like to be a really good singer, like how can I get to be a better
singer by somehow using a lot of what you've taught about rest to improve my voice?
Is there a way of doing that?
Because I just came from vocal practice and I'm excited because I'm celebrating the wins
that I've been getting my harmony really well, which is awesome.
I've been working on harmonies for a while and I'm in this like worship vocal group on
Facebook and this girl is awesome.
And I just feel like I've been praying about it.
I'm like, God, you put it on my heart to be on this worship team.
By the grace of God, I'm on the worship team and I just want to be the best singer I can
be.
And I feel like if I'm able to, if we're able to like manifest things in the spirit down
to earth, can I manifest a better singing voice?
Well, technically yes, but the perspective from which we always do want to do everything
is from love and from the heart of the father.
Because the new agers will cut that part out and they'll just manifest whatever it is that
their soul desires, trying to provide for, protect, give themselves something.
In other words, to give themselves something that they don't believe that God is.
And so technically we can do what you're talking about, but we want to make sure to do it from
the tree of life versus the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and according to the tree
of life, which everything is built off of relationship.
It's not just that, oh, it's something that it is that I desire is guaranteed to be something
that is something that the Lord with you desires to work through you and I'm sorry, I'm not
explaining that very well.
Just because we want something doesn't mean that we're always wanting it for, from the
father heart of the Lord in our spirit, who it is that we are in your spirit.
It might be our soul wanting something and not our spirit wanting something.
Does that make sense?
I don't mean that in a selfish way.
I'm not just a good singer for yourself.
I'm not even talking about that.
I'm talking about the fact that.
Even if it's a godly thing,
Lord, I really like to minister to other people.
Can you give me a good singing voice?
I don't want to bother other people around me,
so please give me a good singing voice.
Things like that.
I'm even talking about things like that
are, again, from a place that sometimes,
you know, can evidence a place that
it's not who it is that we are in the spirit
that is wanting that.
It's something that our soul thinks
that based on what we know of God,
God would want this for us and for everyone else around us
because it would create a better, more godly environment.
I'm not even talking about, you know,
like, oh, well, everyone will look at me.
I know that that's not what you're thinking.
That even from a godly, from a quote-unquote godly perspective
if it's from the soul that believes
that it doesn't have something that it should have,
that's different than doing it
from a heart desire of the spirit.
Does that make sense?
It does.
And I think, like, just a bit of the backstory,
like, I was sitting in the audience
and I didn't know how to sing at all.
I was, like, a terrible singer, in my opinion.
And, I mean, I wasn't great.
But I had this vision that I was supposed
to be up on the stage at my church
with this amazing worship team singing.
And I'm like, well, how is this going to happen?
So then I started taking singing lessons
and God just opened the door.
And now I'm on the, I've been on the worship team
for a number of years now.
And I take singing lessons, like, I work on it.
And I feel like, why would he want me up there
to sing if he wasn't going to make my voice better
and he wasn't wanting me to grow in that area?
So it's not because I want, like you said,
I mean, you know my heart.
I don't want attention, I don't want,
but I want to be, I want to sing a, like, a pleasing song.
Like, I don't want to be singing a song
where people are like, or I don't want to, you know,
I want to make my harmonies sound perfect.
Like, I want to be right on
so that the music sounds really nice.
And so I'm just, because I know this is something
that's on my heart that's really important to me.
And I know it's not something you and I usually talk about,
but I'm like, well, is it possible to somehow in the spirit
ask God to like, I don't know, I don't know how it works
because I'm kind of new to all this.
Yeah, well, so one thing is that you're viewing,
us viewing things from the perspective of,
well, why the, I want my voice to be a specific way
or someone else's voices, regardless.
Someone, a voice needs to be a particular way
in order for it to sound good.
Is a worldly perspective, in other words,
a perspective that the, and a way by which
the world measures things of what is good
and what is singing and what is joyful
and what is pleasing and what is whatever.
And so we don't have, if God put us there,
it's a joyful noise.
If God put us there, it was a sound that needed to be,
that needed to be sung.
It was a frequency that needed to be emitted
from heaven into earth through you.
It needed your spirit, your frequency,
because it's going to change the atmosphere when you sing
strictly because of your frequency.
So by frequency, I'm not talking about anything
really weird and creepy, like,
but I'm just talking about the fact that things
are made up of wave and particle and energy.
And so when, if the scientists were to measure your waves,
it would be different than if they were to measure
my waves singing.
So, and it's yours that God desired to be up there.
Now, he might desire you to grow in a particular way,
meaning like he might desire you to go through this journey
and this experience with him of your voice evolving.
And you can ask him for that.
You can ask him for a particular way
in which you desire your voice to evolve.
And because the desire that it is that you have,
understand isn't bad and it's not wrong.
I wasn't at all saying that.
I meant that what's important is that we do everything
from a place of knowing that we're already protected
and provided for, that God, that what it is,
that we are never in a place of lack
and that you already have everything that you need.
Now, from that position, Lord, you know,
I'd like to manifest heaven into earth in a particular way.
And one of the ways is which is in my voice
and it's sounding a particular way.
It's just the word on my heart.
And so I'd like to take a journey with you, Lord,
in presenting this to your heart,
hearing what it is you have to say
and take my own journey with, by hiring a voice coach.
And so allow, my point is,
allow it to be a spiritual journey
where the Lord shows you the next.
step to take and you continue to present things to him.
But always from a point, always from a place of, you already have everything that you need.
You already, you're not in a place of lack where you're getting something and you're
going to be getting something you don't have.
It's always from a place of, I already have everything.
Now Lord, I'd like it to express itself differently.
I'd like it to express it and put a different expression into the world.
Can you?
That's on my heart.
I'm going to, would you show me how the next steps that I can take to journey into doing
that?
Could you evolve my voice?
Could you show me how to evolve my voice, et cetera, but it needs to come from the perspective
that, that you don't, not from the perspective of, I don't have something that I'm trying
to get to or that I'm, I'm, I'm gaining something that I don't have.
It's always from the perspective of, I have everything already.
Everything's perfect.
Everything's exactly the way that it should be.
And, but, but, but Lord, could the expression on earth begin to evolve and could you take
me on that journey to do that?
Does that make sense?
Yeah, it does.
And I think, I think I was kind of like looking at it as, you know, I don't remember who shared
it, but somebody shared a couple of weeks ago about rats in their backyard and how they
like prayed that they would just go away and they're like, I have, you know, over this
physical realm, I've got authority, so I'm going to pray that God just takes them away.
And then they went away.
So I didn't know if we could do the same thing in us with like something like a singing voice.
Yeah.
Well, yeah, you can, you can talk to it in their case.
Rats obviously can symbolize bad things.
It was creating destruction in, in, in the yard and obviously things like that or not.
But she could tell by what was going on, that it was not something that should be.
And so there is an element also of like something that she just desired.
That was Amy, by the way.
There's also an element of something that she is the son of God, did not desire to foster
an environment of and wanted to, by her own will, choose that the, that the environment
should be different based in order to reflect what she knew to be the, to reflect a certain
aspect of what she knows to be the character of her God.
And so that's how I would recommend that you would do that is for, you know, this is there's
a particular aspect of your character that I know that you have and, and I know that
you are, and I would like to see that expressed in a particular way, in a particular degree
through my singing voice.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
No, it does for sure.
No, I appreciate that.
Thank you.
Yeah.
You're welcome.
So yeah, it's all about, it's all about the life source from which we're approaching something.
Is it believing that we're in lack and it's something that we need to get and that we
want, or is it no already have everything Lord I'd like to see I as a, as a son with
a free will, would like to see creation respond and be affected by heaven in a particular
way.
And can you show me and father me into how to do that and how to make that particular
expression and sound into the earth.
Yeah.
And the Lord will like that because he likes you taking an interest at kingly interest
in something that you'd like to see and being willing to take the journey with him to do
that.
Do what you need to do to be fathered into doing that.
No, for sure.
And I think I do have it in me already.
And I, and I'm just like wanting it to manifest out of my mouth into the world.
So anyway, I appreciate your wisdom.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
It's a good question.
Yeah.
I mean, I, I can't think of many, if any questions that people have asked that don't, that don't
relate to what all we're talking about, because we're talking about how to do everything from
a place of rest as opposed to striving.
So what does it look like in various areas?
And again, it's, it's from a place of understanding that we're not in lack.
That's rest.
And most of the times we approach things from place of, I don't have something I want to
have.
Something is not happening the way it should, et cetera.
And that's the opposite of rest.
And so how do we shift into rest?
No, that's amazing.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Oh, I have something to add to that.
If I could, sure.
So I have always loved to sing and when I got saved at 34, I wanted to be on the worship
team.
And just to make a very long story short, the Lord never opened that door.
for every church I was at, and I was really frustrated.
Oh, let me back up a minute.
So before I got saved, I thought I would go,
you know, see if I could be a singer.
My dad was a singer, by the way,
but I was never really trained.
And so I went to audition with this agent guy,
and I'm telling you, I know now it was really bad.
It's not that I had a bad voice,
I just had a very weak voice because I wasn't trained.
So anyway, then fast forward, I get saved,
I love to sing, wanna be on the worship team,
God never opens that door.
It was really frustrating for me.
And so I just said, okay, Lord, well,
I just, you know, I would get lost in worship,
and my heart was to share that,
because it would come out of my mouth.
And I just, like you, Alana,
I wanted to share that with other believers.
And so finally just decided,
I'm just gonna sing for you, Lord.
And so I would be in church,
and I would be totally lost in worship.
And the Lord, well, I sing in harmonies naturally,
just all over the scales, and I have a very good ear,
because I was trained classically
for about 15 years as a child.
And so I can just sing harmonies all over the place.
And so I would just do that,
because that was how I expressed to God,
and I wasn't thinking about it, I just did it.
And people started, like after the worship,
they would turn around and go,
oh my gosh, I thought there was an angel behind me.
I mean, you do not know how many people said that to me,
but it wasn't because I was on the worship team,
or I was trying to improve my voice,
because like I said, before I got saved,
and I went to sing for the agent, you know,
they'll all take your money, but I know now,
I wasn't, you know, I wasn't material for that.
But what I was trying to say is like,
so when I would be, what I wanna say is like,
it was about relationships.
So when I would get in tune with the Lord,
and I would just be focusing on him and me,
it's incredible what comes out of my mouth.
But if I just try to sing for you, forget it.
You know, it might be on key, but it's,
so what the point I was trying to make is like,
what God wants you to do is to be available
for his spirit to flow through you.
And like Ashley said, it doesn't matter what it sounds like.
It's that you're allowing him to use your vessel
and your frequency to pour through.
And so focusing on that relationship,
rather than the natural, like, oh, my voice,
which is the natural thing,
focus on the spiritual, your relationship with him,
and that you're worshiping him.
And I'm just, this is my own opinion
and what I've experienced.
And then what comes out of your mouth
will even surprise you.
Thank you.
That's awesome advice.
I appreciate that.
Yeah, that was something else I was gonna mention
is that like what Amy was mentioning,
that when we focus in the spirit on singing,
the spirit starts singing out of our mouth.
And so what it is that we don't know how to do,
we start doing, and we don't,
and because there's a letting go
and a release of the resistance,
instead of trying to sing through a soulish resistance,
it's letting go.
And as soon as we let go, everything becomes effortless.
So anyway, same kind of similar idea
in manifesting the spirit out into the body,
spirit out into the body by just letting go of,
in thinking we have to try.
So anyway, I just thought that that would be,
like Amy said, it might be something interesting to do
is to record yourself in your house
where you let yourself go.
You don't try to sing, you just,
and then my point is to see what it sounds like
when you're singing and the spirit just takes over,
where you're just singing
and you're not even listening to your own voice.
You are just, you're just flowing and it can sound bad.
You can flat, you can sharp, you can do whatever.
And then, and just, and then eventually though,
you will find that you will sing better
than if you were trying,
than you were doing it using all of the tips and tricks
that the vocalist was teaching you.
So, and then you can, my point is if you record it
and then you go back and listen to it,
then you can hear what you sound like.
Like maybe even do it side by side,
like sing a song, sing a worship song,
where you're trying and then a worship song
where you're not trying.
you lose yourself in the Lord.
Not just, oh, I'm not trying and I'm just singing.
But no, you lose yourself, you shift yourself
into your identity, into your new man,
into rest in the Lord, and then see what you sound like.
And give yourself a bit of time in the song.
Don't make it like, you know, 60 seconds.
Like, sing for like 10 minutes or something.
You know, and to give yourself time to get caught up
where you stop being self-conscious.
And then listen to what you sound like.
That would be really fun.
Yeah, that would be a good idea.
I'll have to try that out.
I'll let you know at some point when I do how it works.
Yeah, yeah.
Thanks.
And I loved what you girls said, too,
about specifically like the sound part.
Because both Ashley and Amy touched on this
and it resonated both times.
Like, that unique sound that he, our unique expression
that we have, which is our voice and our sound,
just like emphasizing that.
I know I grew up singing and I love that, too.
And it's great, you know, I think the training
and the things that you're doing, you know,
to grow intentionally.
But like alongside that, again,
growing in the substance like behind that,
which is that expression, that sound, that voice
that is so much beyond,
just so much beyond the physical sound.
It's the essence of you and really like what you bring
and what is your heart behind your worship
and why do you sing and why do you worship?
And all of that coming forth out of, again,
that passion and the, what did you say, Ashley?
Like when you're not thinking about it
and it's just kind of, yeah,
just emanating from your spirit.
And so it's almost like a sound from your spirit
coming through your mouth,
but it's more than your actual physical sound.
So I love the emphasis on that.
And I definitely feel like he's emphasizing that
for all of us in this hour and the season that we're in
is like using our voices
and coming to accept our kind of our unique,
just what we uniquely bring
and not even judging it according to each other.
Like I know somebody prophesied over me the other night
and it was kind of unexpected,
but a friend of a friend and what he said was,
he said, God doesn't compare.
Like, because literally we're mirrors of him.
And so you're like this unique expression of him
and he doesn't have any comparison for you,
like to anyone else.
And so it's a very unique
and that's why we can look around and go,
I don't know, it doesn't look like that or sound like her.
Nobody's ever done this before.
And that's because nobody ever has and ever will be you.
And I think it's like a time when he wants us to more
and more like really embrace that and go, yeah,
it is different and unique.
And it probably doesn't sound like anybody else.
And is that even the measure of what's good or not good?
So yeah, just really cool conversation.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's interesting.
Cause then it makes me think when you're talking about
even what we say and like with what we say
coming from the spirit, right?
Like everything that comes out of us, right?
And I love that idea about just like
when everything comes from the spirit,
it just comes out so much better.
And it comes out in a way that is God means
for it to come out.
I think instead of the way like I might mean
for it to come out, cause I'm going, okay,
I want to sound like her, her, her and her.
So I've got to figure out how to sound like them
instead of just looking at my unique voice.
And maybe I haven't even tapped into my unique voice fully
because I'm trying to be like someone else.
And God's like, just be you.
Like no one else is going to be you.
And maybe that's the same for what we say
and how we present our heart to people and things like that.
So it just kind of got me thinking about that too
when you were talking.
Yeah.
Totally.
Yeah.
Cool.
Thanks.
Can I share, I feel like I don't have
this perfectly packaged question,
but I'm okay with that.
And maybe you can help me land on what the question is
if I describe a little bit kind of where I'm at.
And I know a lot of it can be that
I haven't been with you girls for a couple of weeks
and I'm kind of in need of my one-on-one with Ashley,
which has been a little while.
But in that time, I'm going through a ton of transition.
And it's like on every level,
like I have a new full-time job.
So my whole schedule's different,
my whole every day, my work.
But alongside that, God just like opened up so many doors
and the Lord just moved, moved, moved
in these few weeks so rapidly.
And even opening the door for,
just to be back in touch with my attorney,
and which is not something that is like fun,
that I'm like, yes, I wanna.
do this, but like for the sake of my girls and and really resolution and to ongoing conflict
and just kind of day to day, just ongoing abuse is what it is that, you know, he even
opened that door.
And so I was able to get in touch with her, get a job that met the needs of me and my
girls all within a few days, get the money for mediation that he supplied within 24 hours
of me believing for it through an organization that I didn't even know, like did that like
helps women from domestic abuse and situations get legal help and aid.
And so like all these all these amazing things manifesting and yet in that there's still
so much more.
It's almost like the more that I believe for and the more that I see him do, like the more
that there is and now there's more faith for it and more evidence of him coming through.
But I'm just being called out on the water.
Like I keep seeing the vision for the season as like he has me walking out on the water
like Peter and like he keeps saying, you know, lock eyes on me.
And when the wind and the waves come and I start to feel disoriented or my eyes, you
know, are drifting, you know, he's like, wait, wait, wait, like eyes on me because like even
in the midst of all these storms, I'm really truly doing a thing.
And if you just keep walking, you're going to end up in my arms.
And so it's been neat because even that vision turned from that to like, I was like, but
I want to, I want to actually like embrace you.
Like I want to walk on water and be brave and, you know, eyes on you, but I want to
be held.
Like I need to be held by you, Jesus.
And, and so he showed me like, even, you know, me reaching him, like reaching his embrace
and being held.
And then how, like, as I fell asleep or, you know, whatever, cause I'm, I'm human and,
you know, or whatever, I've maybe got fell asleep or got distracted or whatever.
He moved out on the water again.
And he was over here saying like, come here.
It's like a mother with her, you know, toddler, just newly walking, like, come here, you know,
come on, like, we're going to do this, like just right here, you know, I've got you and,
but it was cool how he would move out on the water.
And then again, we would go through that process and the wind and the waves would be, you know,
and he'd keep me focused, coming back to his eyes.
And then again, he keeps moving out.
And so it's almost like everything is a stretch right now and everything is, but then in the
practical, like in the practical, I don't know, like he he's given me the known of right now
in the season, like a job, you know, and things that are, I know a season only, they're not my,
my long-term, but provision and things like that and something that I can enjoy and be passionate
about. And I, but I have very much this knowing that it's only for a season and it's almost like
for a purpose of getting me and my girls to the other side, but I know what he's really called me
to is coming. And that's, that dream is not dead, if that makes sense. Just because I need to have
a job right now as a single mom, but I feel like I'm exhausted and I'm praying even lately for like
energy. I guess I haven't really prayed for energy. I mean, you know, because when you,
when you live with like auto-immune issues and like, I don't know if you've gone through
post-traumatic stress and, and adrenal fatigue and all these different things that kind of come
along with, but I feel physically fatigued and there's this mental, emotional, just so much going
on. I have attorneys, like two different attorneys right now. One's mediation. One's my other attorney.
I've got my girls in a new school situation and I'm not even able to really keep my finger on the
pulse at all because the, the, the alienation and stuff is so bad that I can't even get in there to
really know how to help them. And they're, you know, going through things emotionally and I'm
trying to just parent them. And so I feel like I have a full-time job working Monday through
Friday. I have a part-time at least job of building, you know, a legal case and dealing
with like attorneys and mediation and all the communications and stuff with their dad to try to
co-parent through what is like not co-parenting while dealing with the abuse coming at me and
trying to, not trying, trying to not try. Choosing to not allow that to define me anymore and have
power over me anymore. And so really coming into my voice for the first time after being
muzzled and literally shut down and, you know, not having basically a voice in my children's
lives, according to him, I do have one, but he doesn't want me to have one and squashes it
constantly. And so I've got that part-time job with that whole thing. And then I've got just
single mothering, my girls taking care of the house and the bills and the things. And it's like
all the while, all I want to do is spend time with Jesus. I don't know if you have any thoughts on
what does it look like to transition when you're in like the big transition, the big shift,
the big, like everything's changing. He's literally breaking open all the floodgates and these doors
and saying, redemption is here. It's not going to be like the past four years. And yet that's
all you've known is this way of interacting, you know, for all this time with being the underdog
or being the.
the one that's muzzled and squashed and constantly feeling like you don't really have a voice
and you're, I'm just not honored as a mother, period, like I'm not even seen and his eyes
are treated like I'm a mother and so I'm constantly fighting to just mother my children.
How do you like stay in rest when you're, you know, the busyness and yet in the physical
depletion and exhaustion of the season of single motherhood, but also it's almost like
breaking out of a cocoon.
Like I feel like I'm so ready to fly and he's not wanting me to succumb to, well, this
is just where I'm at and I have to accept it, but he's also saying rest in me and don't
strive and yet keep going and doing the things.
And it's also up in the air that I'm, I'm just like this.
And yet my anxiety, sometimes I still find myself in the little moments that I have,
I'm feeling somewhat insecure, like rejected, anxious.
And I almost wish I had more time with him to process whatever I'm feeling, but I'd like
no time, just keep going, you know?
And then try to worship when you get an hour in the evening or whatever, which is new for
me and part of the, where I'm trying to accept, accept and be thankful for his provision.
And yet, really, I just want to be held.
Yeah.
Well, my goodness, lots of things, one, you were talking about how the Lord, how you would
be held by him and then you'd go to sleep or whatever, wake up and he'd be out again.
And so there was that preciousness of being called to him, invited to him and then walking
towards him or whatever and he'd be held and then he'd start all over.
So understand that in what we see, is we see in the, we, the way that we see pictures like
that in stories is that you're having one or the other, you're being held or he's away.
But actually it's different than that.
You are in, you are always being held.
And in the state of being held, there is this invitation, but it's not a moving, you don't,
you're not being invited to be held.
You're in a state of always being held and in the state of always being held, there's
the invitation come, but the come isn't moving towards Jesus as if you don't, aren't already
there.
It's this, Hey, I'm, I'm calling you into a deeper level of me in order to, in order
to receive, choose to receive your inheritance of, of receiving me to the degree of love
and goodness that I desire you to finally receive, which is your inheritance and which
I want you to operate in, et cetera.
And I want you to know that you can sit, that you can be sustained in me to that degree,
but you're always in a state of being held.
And what I mean by that is we can all say theoretically, Oh yeah, well, we're in a state
of being held and all of that, but I'm talking about the feeling that you have when you're
being held, you are in that state all the time and it's choosing to go to choosing to,
it's choosing that you're in that state and that you exist in that state and that the
invitation is a journey that the two of you are making together to move into deeper realms
of intimacy with each other.
Because the deeper realms of intimacy with each other, are you believing you stepping
out in faith, believing that he's going to sustain you, that he's going to be there because
what you're doing is you're moving more and more into him.
That is the come.
If the come is deeper levels within himself, where he's trying to prove to you, he sustains
you.
It's not him being out there in a circumstance or situation.
He's inviting you to traverse this journey alone.
You're being held and you're moving into deeper levels of intimacy with him, which leads to
greater and greater, which leads to acknowledgement of the greater depth measure of the, of the
degree of love and goodness and holiness and righteousness and faithfulness and whatever
else it is that he says that he is.
So, so there, there is that, as far as like, you know, the, the rest and like, oh, you
know, I want him to spend more time with him.
You know, why can't I spend more, Lord, I'd like to spend more time with you, but there's
all these things that I have to do.
So that now I don't know exactly what it would have, it would look like in your life, you
know, future schedule and all of that, but I can tell you that, that.
There is a world of difference, a absolute world of difference if I put my time with
the Lord first above any other priority that I have to get done that day.
And I don't mean done as if it's like this thing on the checklist where I just spend
time in intimacy in my spirit with the Lord.
Sometimes I lay flat down on my bed and then I'll spend that time with him.
And it could be for 10 minutes.
And when I talk about this, this is what I was doing in my very extreme, intense
transitions where I had a lot riding on things.
I just felt constantly chased by the pressure of what it is that I was believing that I
had to accomplish, the results that I was moving towards, etc.
So I'm not talking about a state, a season in which, well, you just don't have much
going on. I'm talking about a state of a transition in which you can feel you're
being chased, which means that we're in a state of unrest.
We believe that we're lacking and we've got to keep ahead of the game, which we
don't. So what we're doing when we're choosing to prioritize time with his
spirit, you don't even need your Bible with you, just time with his spirit, lay down
on your bed. Or you can, I always would lay down kind of like diagonally, meaning
like it wasn't normal.
It wasn't like my normal way of like laying down in a bed because my body and my mind
and my psyche kind of knows, oh, we go to sleep in this position.
I would do something different, you know, to kind of let myself know, OK, this is
something different. Or you could just sit or sometimes I would sit cross-legged on the
floor, you know, with my back straight in and which would sometimes, you know, help me
keep from going to sleep. And I would just I would just spend intimate time with the
Lord. Sometimes I would talk to him and sometimes it was just it was just spending
time inviting him to reveal his presence to me.
And anyway, so if you honor that first, you are choosing with your actions.
What it is that we're all saying that we believe, which is the fact that everything
comes from a place of rest.
So if you honor that first, but see, OK, if everything comes from a place of rest and if
God fully sustains us, then we're not being chased by time and all of these other
pressures. So if we really do believe it, then we're going to act like it.
And if we really do believe it, what does that look like in real life?
It looks like, well, the heck with everything else.
Then I'm going to focus on making sure that I spend intimate time with the Lord.
If that's what I'm talking about when I tell when I say to all of us, you know, it's
important that we when we choose things that we're choosing because sometimes people
ask me, well, how do I actually choose something?
Well, what we do is we choose we we're choosing that if God says something is true,
we're going to frame our reality that way, saying that, well, this is how I choose that
the world works.
So if the world works like that, what do you do?
You follow the law, it's like, oh, these are the rules by and the laws by which the
world works. So if the world, if the if life works by those laws, what do you then do to
follow those laws?
You spend time and everything's from a place of rest.
So therefore, you're not being chased.
Therefore, you have time to spend to spend with the Lord and to just just position
yourself in him to prove that you have rest, not with the intention of I'm speaking out
to prove to everybody else.
But I mean, in standing in the acknowledgement that, yes, I God gives me rest as my
inheritance and I can operate from a place of rest, proof in point, that's that's what
I'm doing right now. I know I've got a whole lot of other things, but I know that this
is the most important.
And therefore, I'm going to act like it's the most important by ignoring the others in
favor of this. And then and then just spend, I don't know, 10 minutes, 15 minutes, five
minutes, 30 minutes, whatever, whatever it lays on your heart to do.
And and then from that place, you can get everything else done faster, more efficiently
because you're in rest.
So it's acknowledging that what it is that we're saying, like, Lord, you say that rest
is important. You say that I can do everything from.
place of rest. Okay. Well, if I believe that, then how would I act? I would spend time just,
just sitting in the presence of the Lord, see, or just seeking, seeking him on my spirit,
et cetera. Um, and that creates the, that is telling your soul, or it's really your soul,
you know, coming into a habit of alignment with the spirit and it's telling your body,
this is the laws by which we are now operating. We are operating according to spiritual laws,
which say, you know, spiritual loss, meaning relationship, not spiritual laws that we talked
about in soul realm, but like spiritual laws, according to relationship that, um, everything
stems from place of rest that, um, I do not bear the burden or the responsibility of the results
in my life. God does. All I do is I just rest in him and he bothers me into how to govern the
increase while he's working on actually creating the increase. If we believe that, then we're
going to act like it. If we don't believe that we're not going to have enough time to spend with
the Lord because we're so busy trying to make everything happen. Or we're so, or we're trying
to make sure that we're positioning ourselves in such a way that the Lord sees that we are really,
really, um, earnest and will therefore bless us by giving the results. Either way, we're working
for a wage, but if we really believe what we were saying that we believe about rest, we live,
we would live differently. So start living like that. And then, um, to, to prove it to, um, not
to prove it, but to, to flip a switch for your psyche and what it is that, um, that you're
telling your soul, Hey, look, these are the laws of the land of the new, these are the new laws of
the land now. Yeah. And everything will start. We'll start operating in that, in that same, um,
according to that frequency that you're putting out that, in other words, that intention,
I'm a son of God, my own free will, I'm coming into agreement with the Lord. And this is what
I will. I will that everything is from a place of rest that my father really will take care of the
increase and, um, et cetera. And then you, and then after that, well, then you position yourself
in place, rest, and then you go about your day, but you're going about your day in rest, being
able to make very righteous judgments and, and in discernment of how to interact with your ex-husband
and how to, um, how to, um, listening to your attorneys and what advice that they're giving you
and being able to have discernment of, of like what it is that they're saying and what it is
that you should follow and, um, and, uh, what decisions that you should, you should make in,
in the business that you're, that you're helping out with, um, you know, you're, and then you'll
be able to find that, that, um, information that you need to gather. You'll be able to
absorb quicker. You'll be able to learn faster. Um, you'll be able to be more efficient at your
job, all of that, because you're doing it from a place of rest, as opposed to you're trying to
make it all happen. That makes sense. That actually makes sense. A lot of the word reset,
because he told me rest and reset, right, as I met you and started in the rest intensive. And
I've been saying that, like, that's been, you know, his word to me, um, that this is a rest
and reset season, but like what you just described just reminded me of what a reset is. Um, what,
you know, when you, especially when you talked about jump-starting according to this new
norm, like we're resetting it through this, this place and, um, and then the rhythms all follow
that. So that's so good. That's so good. I think the other piece of that, um, which we don't have
to go into now, especially if somebody has another question, but I think another big piece of that
is, um, and you might talk about this in your teaching. So feel free to say that, but like fear
of man and, um, how that's like when you can't be there for hardly anyone, but yourself and your
girls and what it all takes to, you know, for that, like what I just described. And yet you
want to love on people and you have people in your life that you do love and not living with,
not allowing yourself to, to carry guilt for that, nor feel like that insecurity or rejection of like
not being part of things, if that makes sense, like being called into that rest reset and the
identity shift and everything that goes with this, you know, but having come from a place of
people pleasing and perfectionism and fear of man and like that mentality. And suddenly it's like,
I have a lot of peace about my season and I know that it's, it's from him and it's right. And it's
okay that I can't be involved in all the things and the people's lives that I want to be, but I'm
not fully okay with it. It's like, I'm, I am, but there's some part of me, or maybe it's the soulish
part or whatever, the soul that's, that says I'm still wanting in some way to keep up or to, to.
feeling sad that I can't even fill my friends
in on where I'm at.
And then in some ways,
there's certain times that I don't even feel like
I have the energy to reach out and say,
hey, can we talk?
Or will you pray with me or whatever?
Because I start to get in that like, oh, it's just me.
It's just me.
It's all kind of me and God and no one else,
like sort of orphan mentality.
And that's not good either.
So he's teaching me and bothering me in that.
But I think the bottom line is that there's like
this fear of man in that reset of that has to go,
like they can't come with into this new rest mindset.
Yeah, well, the Lord, the Father will bother you
into how to operate and rest in those areas as well.
And yeah, that whole idea of the fear of man,
it can be the aspect that we believe
that we are in a place of that man can provide us
with something that we need.
It can, that's our provision, that's our protection,
because if we don't have it, then we're in lack
as opposed to understanding,
no, we can be completely without it.
And we have all of the provision
and all of the protection that we need.
And I don't, in other words,
that it's not theoretical protection,
it's not theoretical provision,
that it is actually, that God actually fills up
and provides for those relational needs
that we have without other people.
So that's something that's very important for us to learn
when, I mean, for us to understand when we tell each other,
well, you know, God wants us to have relationships.
And God, I don't know, I'm trying to think of cliches
or sayings that people have, but basically,
where people talk about the importance of relationship.
And that is true, but what we're not acknowledging
is that God is giving up himself to us
through someone else,
and he doesn't have to do it through someone else.
So yes, relationships are very important,
but it's because of what the Lord gives,
gives us through someone,
but he can give it to us directly.
Kind of like he said that it's not good for,
one of the things that I was going to say a while ago
is that, you know, well, it's not good for me to be alone.
That's one that people put all of the time.
Well, so it can be used for a woman as well.
You know, it's not good for a man to be alone,
so he should have a wife.
You know, it's not good for a woman to be alone.
You know, she needs a husband.
Well, so what about me?
Am I alone?
Am I incomplete?
Am I uncovered?
Am I unprotected?
No.
So God's very jealous of his relationship with me,
and he chooses how he gives me himself.
He can give me himself through a husband,
or he can give me himself through other relationships
that I have, other, you know,
male and female relationships.
He can give me of himself through different ways,
or he can just give it to me directly
in my times with him, you know, whatever.
My point is that I wanted to acknowledge
the importance of relationships that,
that, but put it in its proper perspective
so that we understand that when we're people-pleasing,
when we're thinking, we believe that they're providing
something for us that they actually can't do,
because even when God does use them,
he is the one giving us the thing through them.
So when they leave, we're still not missing the source.
We're not missing the life source,
because the life source has never abandoned us
and never left us.
So they can't give us an assurance that,
that we're loved, or that,
that they can't, yeah,
that we can't have if they're not there.
I hope that I said that grammatically correct.
But anyway, we're still not abandoned whenever God,
you know, that feeling of abandonment,
and what we believe that that thing means,
like I'm really truly alone in the world,
that if I need something, there's no way for me to get it
if I don't have someone to help me, et cetera.
No, we have the Lord.
So that, then relationships become,
once we become whole and understanding that,
relationships just become a benefit. That when we realize that we really do have everything in the
Lord, which is that whole identity shift, we really do have everything in the Lord, we stop
being people-pleasing because we don't need the relationships. They're just a blessing and they're
just a benefit. My relationships drastically changed. I mean, I wish that there could be a
greater degree than 180 to be opposite of what it was that I was going through and where I am now.
My relationships just took as far of a turn as they possibly could have from what they used to
be. And it was because I noticed a shift when I realized I no longer needed them.
And I opted and I acted like that. I mean, I truly didn't no longer needed them. So now I
could just enjoy them because there was no longer any burden that I was placing on relationships
to fulfill something in my life. That meant that I wasn't people-pleasing anymore. I wasn't worried
that they were going to leave. So therefore it didn't matter if they approved of me or not.
Come to find out, I got a lot more approval the less I needed it.
Yeah. It's almost opposite too. I mean, it almost works both ways. I was thinking like when
in the same way that you don't need a person to keep fulfilling this because
even when they go away, he fulfills it. It's like when they go away, they go away.
And that still leaves that same need if it's being like... If we're not receiving it from the Lord.
Yeah. And we're rejecting it. We're in a state of resistance. Yeah. Or even if we're
if we have expectations and relationships or some kind of need that we're bringing to them
that we're going to end up feeling empty or feeling left just as soon as they leave
with whatever they imparted or whatever they brought into our life. Even if it's for... I've
noticed like even just some weeks can go by and life can be so busy and suddenly you feel
potentially disconnected. And I do think that there's, like you do too, a place for relationships
and they're beautiful, but then you can so quickly feel like, man, we were so connected
like a week or two ago and I feel like I haven't talked to you forever and we're disconnected.
And so I'm just saying that, yeah, he's like the one constant, whether it's through a person
or through his spirit or through creation or whatever circumstance that he's using.
And so we can, I know I probably idolized people in relationships and he's wanting to
yeah, rewire how I think about people, their need for me and my need for them,
because I also have that helper that there's been a codependency of wanting to help
and save in a sense when I don't, I don't, he doesn't need me to do that. So yeah,
that's really, really good. Thank you. Yeah. You're welcome. The more that we focus on our
identity and understanding who it is that we are, everything else in our lives starts fixing
itself without us working on it. My relationships fix themselves without me working on them.
Because all I did was I put on my own oxygen mask first, which is me and the Lord, me and
my relationship with the Lord, me and acknowledging and receiving and accepting the fact that I am who
he says that I am, and that I'm going to believe everything that he says, and I'm going to actually
act on it. Everything in my life started shifting. Everything. I was, you know, healing from past
traumas. I suddenly had more clarity in my business. I, my, my, the intimacy of my relationship
with the Lord developed. My relationship started taking a 180. I started, I think I mentioned this,
you know, started having more discernment in specific areas of wisdom of knowing what to do
or what was really actually going on in a particular situation without me working on
all of these things. It was shockingly effortless just because I suddenly knew who I was. And we
don't realize how our entire lives we have framed up trying to cope with the fact that we're
struggling with our identity. That is, that's how we have structured our entire life, our job, our
decisions, our discernment, you know, our relationships, everything is framed up according
to the fact that we do not, we don't know that we've lost our identity. And remember that according
to this one pastor that I heard, he told me, I was talking to him about this, and he told me
that, that the, that the word sin, the, that is translated in English from the Greek,
Hermantia, that ha means lost. And my, um,
comes from miros, and he said that miros means image or part or element.
In other words, that it's lost image, lost identity, lost part.
So sin comes from this idea that we've lost our identity and are in our efforts to get
it back.
We're trying to, we're trying to grasp it.
And so our entire world is framed up as just one, one huge duct taped structure of coping
mechanisms.
So good.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Is there anything else before we jump off because it is, well, it's nine on my end.
I think it's 10 on most of y'all's end.
Everybody good?
I was just thinking when Lisbeth was talking, I just like when both of you were talking,
actually, my, so I have neighbors behind and neighbors beside, and they have children that
are my daughter's age, and my daughter's an only child.
So I have been needing them to play, like I wanted them in my life to play with her.
I wanted them there.
So she had friends.
And it was so important for me to have that.
And once there's been a little bit of fear around COVID again, because schools are opening
up and stuff like that.
And so the neighbors have started to pull their kids back a little bit for various reasons
around COVID and other things.
And I know it's nothing personal, but I was sad and upset because I'm like, well, there's
there aren't kids to play with my daughter now, because I was reaching outside of myself
for them and needing them.
So as you were talking, that was kind of coming up for me how much I've needed them, but then
I don't know how to navigate not needing them because I feel like I don't need them because
I'm not lacking anything, but my daughter won't have those friends in her life as much
if I'm not working to like arrange playdates or whatever it is.
And so I'm not sure how to navigate that part with what you were talking about.
Well, it's the same thing.
It's whether we believe that we don't need it, or whether we believe our daughter doesn't
need it.
So we have to entrust our daughter, our children's identity with the Lord as well, that the Lord
is the one who provides for all of them, the Lord is the one who protects them, you know,
etc.
It's easier for us to trust ourselves with the Lord than it is our children.
So that's an additional step, an additional measure in which we're stretched into operating
from place of rest, understanding that there really is no lack, so we can trust ourselves
and our protection and provision, and we can trust ourselves with the Lord easier than
we can trust our children with the Lord.
So but it's the same thing.
If God can provide for me, he can provide for my child.
I don't have to, I don't have to make something happen.
I can help steward things, I can, you know, can help create an environment, but it is
since she's the Lord's, ultimately, instead of yours, it's collaborating with the Lord
and hearing his heart of how he wants her life to be and how he wants to provide for
her, because ultimately, he's the one who wants to provide for her.
And then we get the benefit of being able to collaborate with him to provide for and
to manifest a particular environment in a particular way into the world for someone else.
But it's trusting, it's trusting our children with the Lord in the same way that we trust
ourselves with the Lord.
We say that we're not in a place of lack, it means that our children are not in a place
of lack either, that even if they don't, even if the friendships don't work out in this
particular way, that they're still not in a place of lack because they exist in a reality
in which they're never in lack.
We don't, yeah.
I was just going to say, how do I help her understand that?
Because she feels like she's in lack when she doesn't have them around to play with.
Yeah, well, because she's used to doing the same thing that we all do, which is we're
looking outside of ourselves to tell us something about ourselves.
And we can't look at the wind in the waist and just like children, I mean, just like
we do, children can start to be taught to look at the wind in the waist.
And she's four years old, she's had four years, which honestly, I know that
to us adults, it doesn't seem like a very long time. There's something on me. It really likes me.
That four years is a very long time because children absorb things just like sponges.
Honestly, all humans absorb things like sponges. It's just that we as adults have started to shut
down and create so much resistance. We don't absorb things as quickly, but we have the
capability of absorbing things just as quickly and easily as children. We've just built up
so much resistance to it. I'm trying to think if I answered everything that I was going to,
if I was going to flesh that out a little bit more. You were saying she was four years old,
and so that's a lot of time for her to maybe build up habits.
Yes, to build up particular mindsets that she has to look at the outside in order to tell her
something because that's how we teach children. We tell them, okay, well, did you see this happen?
Well, no, I didn't. Okay, well, then that means this. We tell them to look at their environment,
to tell them something. She's had four years of that. She's had four years to learn that whatever
is going on, it's saying something. It's saying something about her or whatever. Some of that is
just in her genes. She's inherited it from you, and she inherited it from her dad. You all inherited
it from your parents. You inherited it from their parents. Some of that is in the genes,
and each of us is called to overcome believing that whatever is going on in the outside is not
where we should get our objective truth. That's part of being a parent is fathering them in the
way that the Lord fathers us of how to truly believe that we're not in a place of lack.
Your daughter has a particular need, and it's deeper than a friendship. It's what that friendship
is providing in her life. If she can get the provision in another way,
she doesn't miss the friendship. I'm not saying that she shouldn't be without friends. It's not
my point. I'm trying to make a point about the fact that the issue isn't the friendship. It's
what the friendship is providing for her. That's how it is for all of us. If someone has that,
and the Lord can provide it in a variety of ways, if she doesn't have the friends, God can still
provide her with the other. When God provides us with the other, we don't need the friends.
They're a benefit because they can no longer harm us because we don't need them. It's a problem if
we're enslaved to needing something outside of ourselves. It's this process that she'll go
through. During the transition, it hurts. During the transition, it's hard. During the transition,
it's like, why can't I play with them? Why don't they want to play with me? Is it something about
me? We all go through that. She'd go through it as well. It is part of the journey. I highly
recommend that you go to the Lord and tell him, okay, Lord, she's yours. This is something that
allowed me to be part of her life, Lord. This is what I think would be really good for her.
How do you wish to provide for that? I'm asking that you begin to move on her behalf
that provides for her, provides the provision of protection that you say it is that you give her
that manifests as a friendship. I don't know how you want to do it, Lori, but I ask that
you make provision for her in this area. God is a loving father who understands that that is the
only way that your daughter knows how this thing that she needs is able to be gotten. It's able to
be gotten by friendships. The Lord knows that. He knows that that's where she's looking and that in
her young state, if that's where she's looking, that's where he's going to put himself. He'll give
her friendships. I was just letting you know the background of what's really going on, but her and
her young age, meaning not her young ages physically, but her young age of the soul.
He knows that that is where she's trying to find provision and protection and that she can feel
safe with the Lord. And so that's where he's going to put himself. He's going to put himself,
he's going to give her a friend so that she knows she's loved,
because that's where she's going to be looking to know whether or not she...
love. So the Lord will do that. And then as she gets older, the
Lord starts, okay, now you got to look at me, and not the
friend, you got to look at me, but he'll take her through the
process of doing that. So you can, I recommend that you
petition the Lord about making provision for that in the
physical realm.
Sounds like a good idea. Thank you.
You're welcome.
All right, well, I will see all of y'all next week. And I plan
to see all y'all next Thursday. So that'll be fun. I don't know
where I'm going to be next Thursday. We'll see. Yeah, those
plans are in the works. I don't know where I'm going to be yet.
I know where I'm going to be in October, middle of October, but
I don't know where I'm going to be before then. So we'll see.
So I'm not talking to the Lord about the next few days. But
anyway, good to visit with all of y'all.
Yeah, you too.
You too. It was really good tonight. Thanks for sharing all
of you what you shared tonight. It's been really good.
Oh, good. Good. Yeah, thanks for y'all. Good questions. Y'all
always come up with good ones.
Go have dinner with your friends.
I will.
Yes, have dinner with your friends.
Thanks, I will.
Thank you so much. That was so, so many good downloads and
insights. I'll be chewing and applying all this.
Oh, good. I'm glad. Always good to get to visit with all of
y'all community.
Yeah.
Bye.
Love you. Bye.