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hi alana hey how are you good how are

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you

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good i hear kids or do you have children

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I have four, you're actually hearing the two puppies in the background, brand new puppies.

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It's like having newborns.

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Wow.

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And you have four kids as well?

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Yeah.

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Oh my gosh.

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How old are they?

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15, 12, nine and four and a half.

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Oh, wow.

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Are they homeschooling right now or are they at school?

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We homeschool anyway, so it's been just business as usual here.

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Interesting.

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Well, that's good.

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Yeah.

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It was kind of weird for all of our friends and I said, well, nothing really changed for

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us, except I can't threaten to put them on the school bus now.

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I used to do that, but I can't.

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Where do you live?

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West Virginia.

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Okay, cool.

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Because it's so different.

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I find everywhere you go, they have different rules.

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Like some places you're only doing remote learning, other places they have the option.

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And here it depends on your county.

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We have this little rainbow map.

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And if your county is in the orange or red, you have to be at home.

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And if it's green or yellow, you go to school.

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And it's county by county.

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Because you're in Canada, right?

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So how is it affecting everybody up there?

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Well, it's been really good.

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Like the past few months, we really flattened the curve.

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But then they've had a lot of the university students coming into different cities.

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And now there's been a surge.

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So it is not as good as it was.

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So we actually, it was kind of sad.

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It was very sad, actually.

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On Saturday morning, our premier announced that there was going to be.

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So it used, on Friday night, it was gatherings of 100 outside and gatherings of 25 inside.

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Saturday morning, he announced, starting Saturday morning,

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that it was going to be gatherings of 25 outside and 10 inside.

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Saturday morning, on a fall day.

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Do you know how many people had weddings on Saturday with 100 people outside?

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And they had to bring their guest list down 75 people at the last, the morning of their wedding.

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Oh, my goodness.

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So sad.

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So usually they give a little bit of warning.

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They'll say, you know, okay, starting tomorrow.

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Or give like at least a day or two warning, but no warning.

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And it was, it was like very sad for a lot of people.

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There was a lot going on here that people had to cancel.

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And I just felt, I felt sad for them because people travel in from out of town.

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And they're expecting to go to a wedding.

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And they pay for all this stuff to come.

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And then all of a sudden, oh, sorry.

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I don't know.

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I just, that was, that was hard.

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Yeah.

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Not for me because I.

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I didn't, I wasn't getting married or anything.

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I had a birthday party for my daughter, but we were around 10 anyway.

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So it wasn't a huge deal, but.

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A lot.

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My friend's an event planner and she does a lot of weddings and she's,

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she was just like, wow.

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A lot of.

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Brides.

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But I know it's real. A friend of mine.

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Last.

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It was a week for last.

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And she just lost her mom and her grandma three days apart to COVID.

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They fought it for three and a half weeks and most of the month they

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fought it.

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And her mom was picking up doing well,

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and then just did a nose dive and her grandma died three days later.

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So everybody's sharing these posts.

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They're talking about it being fake. And I know Kelly sitting over here,

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going, no, it's not fake.

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Cause she just lost her mom and her grandma.

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So it's, it's bad.

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Yeah. I mean, that's, and it's, it's, it does affect older people more,

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for sure. Like we've had some friends who've, at least when,

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when it comes to like.

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Taking their life. It's older.

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We've had a lot of friends who've had it.

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And some friends whose parents and grandparents have passed away from

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it.

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Or, you know, seventies, eighties one, my friend's grandpa was 102.

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And he passed away from it.

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Yeah.

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I mean, it's, it's awful, but so sad because.

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It's just so.

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You know, I guess unexpected, right?

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Like for something like that to happen, I know eventually we all go,

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but.

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It's just hard for the people left behind.

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Way to go.

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It's an awful.

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And because they're isolated and they can't be with family.

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I don't know if it's the same there,

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but it's just so sad.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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I mean,

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I had a procedure done yesterday and they finally.

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This is in the last month.

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They finally allowed people to come into the hospital.

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So Dan went in.

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He went to the waiting area with me,

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the waiting room that you're in and then he stayed there.

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He didn't go back out to the main waiting area.

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He stayed in that little room,

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which was nice because then he wasn't having to sit with anybody else.

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Yeah.

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her in the parking lot, just dropped her off at the door and waited.

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What, what did you have surgery on?

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Um, I had an ablation and while I was in there, they tied my

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tibia and fixed an umbilical hernia.

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Oh, the list was so long.

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I didn't expect it.

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I didn't see.

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And then they did laparoscopy and went through and they investigated.

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I'm like, oh my goodness.

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Which I didn't expect them to fix my belly button.

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I'm like, Hey, that's a nice surprise, I guess.

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Like, are you in pain right now?

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A little bit.

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I'm about due for some medicine in about half an hour and I can tell it.

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Yeah.

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I didn't know if I'd be able to log on or not, but Dan's taking care of the girls.

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And I just kind of saved my little chair today, but all I feel like doing.

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Yeah, I bet.

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Oh, I'm glad you can make it Steph.

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I wasn't, I thought, oh, I bet Steph's not going to be able to.

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I was, I didn't think I would.

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I wasn't sure if I'd be able to yesterday was they didn't give me any

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time before I'd had ear surgeries.

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So they just automatically give you a patch behind your ears for nausea.

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So I didn't think anything of it.

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And when I lifted my head up off the table, the whole room just spun.

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I went, oh, and just kind of laid there.

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And the nurse was giggling about me being a lightweight.

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Cause all the medicine knocked me out.

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I slept all day.

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And then I went upstairs and I slept all night.

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Wow.

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Yeah.

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Now I needed a nap.

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I needed a nap.

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I was looking forward to that.

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You're way overdue for a nap.

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Way overdue for lots of sleep.

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I'm so glad when you look like you're doing good.

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So I feel okay.

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Isn't that nice that those surgeries aren't as invasive as they used to be?

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Like this, you know, major scarring and whatever.

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So was it, is it a pretty small incision?

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Did they do it with robotics or?

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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So I've got my belly button, which I had an umbilical

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hernia for when I had Emma.

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I guess baby number four and my belly button just popped.

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And so I didn't even know they were going to fix it.

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And he called another surgeon over and said, Hey, go ahead,

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fix that when we're done.

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Okay.

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But then I have one off the side and one a little lower.

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So I have three incisions.

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Oh, but I didn't expect that.

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So all those muscles are just knotted up and pretty tender.

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And Emma goes, your belly.

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But I know, but your belly hole.

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I know, I know.

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I should have worried about my belly button.

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Aw, poor thing.

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It'll be okay.

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I promise.

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I'm glad that you're doing good.

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That it's okay.

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Did the IV and all of the, and all of that go okay.

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It went well.

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She was very slick.

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It was an answer prayer there.

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Cause I don't handle needles well at all.

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And then they did the blood work first and then they did the IV.

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I'm going, Oh, yay.

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So, but it went well.

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Good.

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Well, so far it is just us on.

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I, um, apparently did not get the, um, I actually

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have those, those posts set up to automatically go out two

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hours before every call.

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I mean, before every Thursday call, but, um, it apparently that

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Facebook will only let you do them.

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So many, so many, um, times out, I think either that, or maybe

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I just did it so many weeks out.

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I don't remember how it works, whatever it was.

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Um, apparently I ran out of scheduled posts.

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And, um, so last week and this week, I guess I forgot that I

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didn't have them scheduled.

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And so I just assumed y'all are getting the posts without me.

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And, uh, needing to touch them, but apparently not.

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So I will, hopefully people will see it in a minute and then, and

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then pop on if they have time and they want to, but so, um, I

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know it's just the two of us.

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I mean, three of us, I'm at the two of y'all three of us, um,

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that are on here right now, but, um, did anyone have anything that

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they wanted to, to, um, start us off with?

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Um, I'll try to think if there's anything that I can think of,

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if y'all can't think of something.

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I've got, um, like I texted you earlier and I watched your video.

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So I watched the video on like God's sovereignty.

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I think that's how you say it.

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Sovereignty that's thank you.

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Um, and, uh, our free will.

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And so it was really good.

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And I took, I took some notes on it and I wanted to like unpack it a little

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bit more with you, if that's okay.

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Yeah.

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So with my client, so right now my, my focus is in this realm of like

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discovering your purpose is the best way to overcome pain and

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hurt and live God's vision.

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And I I'm kind of like, okay.

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I know that some people are going to come to me and say, but

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God's will prevails regardless.

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Like he'll, you know, even like, here's the point you're getting to, and it

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might look like this instead of this, but either way.

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no matter what you do or what you choose,

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God has a purpose for you and you will fulfill it

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regardless if you overcome your pain,

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regardless if you make choices this way or that,

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you go on the wide path versus the narrow,

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you'll end up in the same place.

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And so I know I'm gonna get that kind of pushback

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from people, which is a great question.

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And I guess I was wondering how to address that exactly.

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And I liked your examples that you gave.

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And I was wondering if you had any more wisdom

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you could share on that.

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So you said that what you're sharing,

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what you share with people is about the,

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is the fact that regardless of whether they overcome

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their trauma, they will accomplish their destiny.

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Or were you saying, or were you asking me to clarify

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if that's what I was saying?

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No, neither actually.

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I was, so what I'm, what I'm teaching people

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is like discovering their purpose

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is the best way to overcome the pain and the hurt

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and live God's vision.

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Because when you're in your purpose, God's purpose for you,

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like overcoming the pain and the hurt

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kind of goes hand in hand with like agreement to him

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in the spirit of who he is, who he says you are,

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his protection and provision.

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All of that comes, I believe from like a healing of the soul

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and you can tell me if I'm on the wrong track,

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I'm totally open to that.

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So I'm just kind of curious about people who come to me

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and say, no, that's not actually true.

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And they say that it's not true

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because they're saying what else is true?

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Well, that no, no matter what God has a purpose for you

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and it doesn't matter like how you get there.

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Like I was saying about here's the point

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and you get there this way or however,

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that you don't necessarily need to work

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through all that stuff.

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God will heal you when he's ready.

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He will work it out in his timing in his way

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and you don't need to do anything.

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You just need to sit there and be and everything will work.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Okay, I think I understand now.

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And yeah, now I'm making the connection

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with what you were writing in the message.

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So yeah, that is actually a very,

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from a very victim mentality and that I,

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the belief that, and we can have compassion on those people

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because they are, all of us have either lived

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through a victim mentality or are still struggling

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with it in certain areas of our lives.

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So we can all have compassion

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and people aren't born like that.

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They develop it by experiences, by experiences

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and it could have been like,

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by experiences, by experiences and it could have been

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when they were less than a year old,

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could develop when they were older.

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But the point is that things happen

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in which they felt that they were,

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that they were completely out of control

307
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and that the things that happened to them

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were out of control.

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And so therefore, it happened

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because it was out of their control.

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And so therefore it must mean that healing

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must come out of their control.

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And so it's very, very understandable perspective.

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But the thing is that in reality,

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our destiny isn't something that we do like,

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like, oh, writing a book or I don't know,

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impacting all of these people or whatever.

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It's not this thing that we actually do.

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It's actually, our destiny,

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what we were put on this earth to do was to overcome.

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It was to manifest who it is that we are in spirit

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down into our soul so that it starts manifesting

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in the body.

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And then once we have that,

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then we can give it to the rest of creation.

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It will come out in our businesses.

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It'll come out in the way that we interact with animals.

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It will come out in people's ministries, whatever.

329
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And so the way that we do that is

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there's all of these traumas

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that have been developed in the soul

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and that manifest as sicknesses, stress and anxiety

333
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in the body.

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And we have to, and so overcoming, us overcoming,

335
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our purpose and our destiny on earth

336
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is to overcome those traumas,

337
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is to overcome all of that.

338
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And so, yes, sometimes God does heal us miraculously.

339
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He'll heal us from traumas miraculously.

340
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He will just come in from left field.

341
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We're blindsided.

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We didn't even ask for it.

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Somebody else did it for us, et cetera.

344
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But there's, that is not the same thing

345
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as overcoming exactly.

346
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Overcoming is where we make an intentional choice to.

347
00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:05.360
partner with the Lord, even if we don't know that, that even if we don't have all the words for it,

348
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there's an intentionality there to, to come into agreement with like what you were saying,

349
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come into agreement with who it is that God says that we are and choose to manifest that because

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we're the ones that God says that he's given me power and the authority to, to say who it is that

351
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we are in the spirit and to manifest that down into our own soul, which is unified with our

352
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spirit and then down into our body, which is unified with our soul and our spirit. So I,

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in my own spirit, soul, and body, and each of y'all are your own spirit, soul, and body,

354
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we're get, we're given the kingship over ourselves. And so therefore it's up to us

355
00:20:44.240 --> 00:20:51.040
to, and why we were put on this earth to go through the process of overcoming our own land.

356
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It's ours. It's mine. It's not Stephanie's. It's not yours. It's mine. And therefore I'm

357
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responsible for overcoming it. Yes, God does do miraculous works, et cetera, but our whole

358
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destiny, our purpose is to overcome. And because it's to come into agreement with the fact that

359
00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:16.400
our identity, our identity is what God says that he is, which is what you say that you teach them.

360
00:21:16.400 --> 00:21:22.880
Their identity is what he says that he is. And there is, and a lot in manifesting that identity

361
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is, is our purpose, you know, who it is that we are. Well, we're sons and we're Kings, and we're

362
00:21:28.720 --> 00:21:32.080
going to show that to our soul and our body. So it comes into agreement. And then we're going to,

363
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therefore show the rest of the world. And then by seeing a son of God, everything is transformed

364
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when our soul and our body recognizes and sees a son of God, which is what our spirit is.

365
00:21:43.280 --> 00:21:49.520
It totally transforms. There's nothing as miraculous on earth. The same thing with

366
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creation. Same thing with other people's souls. When they come in contact with seeing a son of

367
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God, everything changes. There are people that, that notice how creation will flock to them,

368
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like literally deer or nocturnal animals that come out during the daylight. And then they'll

369
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come up to them when normally those types of creatures are scared of people. Think of kind

370
00:22:12.320 --> 00:22:16.720
of like a snow white, you know, cause snow white's on steroids, but just think of like,

371
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kind of like a snow white idea of like, there are, you know, creatures are, are, are meant,

372
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whether it's animals or trees or whatever, to respond to sons of God, our soul and our body

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does the same thing. It's meant to respond to our spirits when it sees them and recognizes that it's

374
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a King. So that is our mandate. That is our purpose. That is our destiny, et cetera, which

375
00:22:42.400 --> 00:22:47.520
sounds like what it is that you, that you teach. So that's, that's an explanation.

376
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Was there another way that you wanted me to flesh it out?

377
00:22:53.440 --> 00:23:01.920
Yeah, no, that's beautiful. And I also, so you had given some examples in your video of

378
00:23:03.040 --> 00:23:09.280
Isaiah, I think it was, who God called him. God said, who will go? And he said, I will.

379
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And the Israelites, right. And, and like the 40 years in the wilderness and that,

380
00:23:15.520 --> 00:23:21.760
can you unpack, like the first one is pretty self-explanatory and the Israelites, I believe

381
00:23:21.760 --> 00:23:28.800
if I know the story, right. Yeah, they were in the wilderness and they, they, can you actually

382
00:23:28.800 --> 00:23:34.400
just unpack that story a little bit more? And if you have any other examples of that happening in

383
00:23:34.400 --> 00:23:42.080
the Bible where somebody like, cause part of the argument for what we're talking about is that

384
00:23:43.040 --> 00:23:47.040
what you said in the video about coming into agreement with God. And if we don't come into

385
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agreement with God, then he will find someone else to do the will. Right. So yeah, I just wanted,

386
00:23:53.840 --> 00:24:00.800
I would love for you to unpack that a little bit more. Okay. Yeah. So remember that the,

387
00:24:00.800 --> 00:24:06.640
it says in the Bible, I don't remember the exact scripture reference. So you might want to Google

388
00:24:06.640 --> 00:24:12.160
it, find the exact scripture reference, but it says that the earth, that the heaven is the Lord's

389
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and that the earth was given to man. So that allows us, so what God is doing is he's trying

390
00:24:18.640 --> 00:24:25.200
to mature us and father us as sons to look like him and act like him and to govern creation in

391
00:24:25.200 --> 00:24:31.520
the same way that he governs what he created so that we can look and act like our father and give

392
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to the earth what we have been given. We've been given salvation by the Lord. We've been given

393
00:24:36.320 --> 00:24:42.480
freedom, et cetera, and freedom from frustration. And so we now want to get that into creation.

394
00:24:43.040 --> 00:24:48.320
So it mentions that. And our, so the scripture verses that we'll, that we'll talk about,

395
00:24:48.320 --> 00:24:54.080
you know, about the Israelites, et cetera. The reason that all of that is important is because

396
00:24:54.080 --> 00:24:59.040
God gave us a mandate when he put us on this earth, he's, he, and he told Adam this, you know,

397
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be fruitful.

398
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:05.920
and multiply and have dominion over the earth, et cetera, he was saying, look, I'm going

399
00:25:05.920 --> 00:25:12.640
to father you into how to govern, how to have dominion.

400
00:25:12.640 --> 00:25:18.560
And so it's not going to be me running the show, it's like, I want you to partner with

401
00:25:18.560 --> 00:25:27.280
me to bring who I am in spirit and who both of us are in spirit, you as my son and me,

402
00:25:27.280 --> 00:25:30.360
I want you to manifest that into the earth.

403
00:25:30.360 --> 00:25:35.600
So in order for things to manifest into the earth, we partner with them.

404
00:25:35.600 --> 00:25:39.480
That's the way that God created it, as opposed to him just going through and whatever he

405
00:25:39.480 --> 00:25:43.160
wants done, boom, he blasts it and boom, it's done on the earth.

406
00:25:43.160 --> 00:25:47.360
So therefore we constantly, if we believe that theology, then we're constantly wondering,

407
00:25:47.360 --> 00:25:50.280
Lord, why aren't you saving me?

408
00:25:50.280 --> 00:25:52.320
Why aren't you doing this, that, and the other for me?

409
00:25:52.320 --> 00:26:00.760
And God's like, no, I'm maturing you and fathering you into partnering with me.

410
00:26:00.760 --> 00:26:02.800
And that's what manifests things on the earth.

411
00:26:02.800 --> 00:26:08.600
So that's why we have to agree with the Lord and receive what it is that he says that he's

412
00:26:08.600 --> 00:26:12.780
given, say for instance, Canaan, in order for it to manifest.

413
00:26:12.780 --> 00:26:20.120
We have to agree with the promise in order to be able to be given the promise.

414
00:26:20.120 --> 00:26:23.480
He's already given the promise, but we have to be able to agree with it in order to receive

415
00:26:23.480 --> 00:26:24.600
it, is my point.

416
00:26:24.600 --> 00:26:27.440
So that was the case that the Israelites found themselves in.

417
00:26:27.440 --> 00:26:29.680
They had left Egypt and they were all very excited.

418
00:26:29.680 --> 00:26:34.040
Oh my goodness, we're being saved from being slaves.

419
00:26:34.040 --> 00:26:38.440
Well, there was all the problem in going through the wilderness, constantly complaining.

420
00:26:38.440 --> 00:26:40.040
They were new.

421
00:26:40.040 --> 00:26:43.160
They were learning how to be fathered.

422
00:26:43.160 --> 00:26:48.020
They knew nothing but slavery for 400, 450 years, however long that was.

423
00:26:48.020 --> 00:26:55.260
So they had a very victim, victimized mentality, which we can understand.

424
00:26:55.260 --> 00:26:57.340
They're just used to being oppressed.

425
00:26:57.340 --> 00:27:00.060
So they complain, complain, complain.

426
00:27:00.060 --> 00:27:05.060
But God constantly proves through all of these situations that he is faithful and that he

427
00:27:05.060 --> 00:27:07.300
will always provide for and protect them.

428
00:27:07.300 --> 00:27:10.580
And that if he says something, he always does it.

429
00:27:10.580 --> 00:27:15.660
So that by the time they would get to Canaan, if he said, hey, look, it doesn't matter what

430
00:27:15.660 --> 00:27:20.860
the outside looks like, and it doesn't matter what the environment looks like, it doesn't

431
00:27:20.860 --> 00:27:22.460
matter how big the giants are.

432
00:27:22.460 --> 00:27:28.500
If I say that I've given you this land and I say that you can conquer, then therefore

433
00:27:28.500 --> 00:27:29.500
you can do it.

434
00:27:29.500 --> 00:27:34.700
And you need to agree with me in order to be able to receive the promise and step into

435
00:27:34.700 --> 00:27:36.460
the promised land.

436
00:27:36.460 --> 00:27:41.820
So when they say, oh no, have you seen those giants?

437
00:27:41.820 --> 00:27:43.100
We can't take them.

438
00:27:43.100 --> 00:27:45.780
That's not going to be with us, et cetera, et cetera.

439
00:27:45.780 --> 00:27:49.340
Then God said, fine, according to what you've said, so be it.

440
00:27:49.340 --> 00:27:55.460
Because he gives us that power and the authority that what we declare to be so will be so.

441
00:27:55.460 --> 00:28:00.140
They had said all of this whole time, I don't remember how long they were in the wilderness.

442
00:28:00.140 --> 00:28:03.020
I thought it was, I don't remember how many months.

443
00:28:03.020 --> 00:28:07.340
I could be wrong about this to take it with a grain of salt, but I thought it was approximately

444
00:28:07.340 --> 00:28:10.640
a year that they were traveling from Egypt to Canaan.

445
00:28:10.640 --> 00:28:11.820
It could have been shorter than that.

446
00:28:11.820 --> 00:28:12.820
I don't remember.

447
00:28:12.820 --> 00:28:19.220
Point is they were traveling for however long and through that time they kept saying, well,

448
00:28:19.220 --> 00:28:23.300
you know, God, have you left us, have you, have you called us out into the wilderness

449
00:28:23.300 --> 00:28:24.300
to die?

450
00:28:24.300 --> 00:28:26.340
And I was like, no.

451
00:28:26.340 --> 00:28:29.300
And so he would provide for them and he would protect them and he would do whatever it is

452
00:28:29.300 --> 00:28:31.300
that they were complaining that he wouldn't do.

453
00:28:31.300 --> 00:28:36.700
So by the time they get to Canaan and then they're rejecting what God said is true and

454
00:28:36.700 --> 00:28:40.620
they're like, no, no, we can't, we can't conquer all of these people.

455
00:28:40.620 --> 00:28:44.180
God said, okay, according to, according to your words, so be it.

456
00:28:44.180 --> 00:28:50.740
I asked you to partner with me and when I give you a word, I ask you to agree with it,

457
00:28:50.740 --> 00:28:54.700
which will then allow the thing to manifest on earth, meaning that it will manifest in

458
00:28:54.700 --> 00:28:59.660
our lives, meaning that we will be able to receive that, that promise.

459
00:28:59.660 --> 00:29:05.020
We will be able to actually live that promise out, out into the earth and because they didn't

460
00:29:05.020 --> 00:29:09.220
agree with him, they didn't, and therefore they didn't receive it.

461
00:29:09.220 --> 00:29:10.580
They didn't get the promise.

462
00:29:10.580 --> 00:29:16.180
They didn't get the fulfillment because it required their, um, uh, required their agreement

463
00:29:16.180 --> 00:29:17.180
with him.

464
00:29:17.180 --> 00:29:20.620
That was a way in which they partner with the Lord, um, cause the Lord doesn't want

465
00:29:20.620 --> 00:29:22.020
to do things alone.

466
00:29:22.020 --> 00:29:24.140
Just like we don't want to do things alone.

467
00:29:24.140 --> 00:29:26.580
He desires relationship, which is why he created us.

468
00:29:26.580 --> 00:29:31.940
So he said, you've been saying all of this time that you, I brought you into the wilderness

469
00:29:31.940 --> 00:29:33.060
to die.

470
00:29:33.060 --> 00:29:38.220
So therefore you're going to go into the wilderness and you're going to die and you will not get

471
00:29:38.220 --> 00:29:40.840
the chance to enter the promise land.

472
00:29:40.840 --> 00:29:41.840
So what did they do?

473
00:29:41.840 --> 00:29:44.020
It was like, Oh Lord, we're so sorry.

474
00:29:44.020 --> 00:29:46.100
We will take you up on your promise.

475
00:29:46.100 --> 00:29:48.740
We will choose to receive it.

476
00:29:48.740 --> 00:29:53.420
And so hurry, let's rally the troops literally and let's go for it.

477
00:29:53.420 --> 00:29:57.980
So they went in, but remember they'd already told God that they weren't in agreement with

478
00:29:57.980 --> 00:29:58.980
him.

479
00:29:58.980 --> 00:29:59.980
So when they, and they'd already,

480
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:01.680
they'd already declared that.

481
00:30:01.680 --> 00:30:03.920
Hey, Carrie, how you doing?

482
00:30:06.760 --> 00:30:08.480
They'd already declared that,

483
00:30:08.480 --> 00:30:11.680
and so that's why they failed.

484
00:30:11.680 --> 00:30:15.080
God had told them that he would make sure

485
00:30:15.080 --> 00:30:16.300
that they could conquer the land.

486
00:30:16.300 --> 00:30:19.000
So why did, when they actually went,

487
00:30:19.000 --> 00:30:20.400
could they not conquer the land?

488
00:30:20.400 --> 00:30:23.400
Because they'd already not agreed with him.

489
00:30:23.400 --> 00:30:26.680
So God's like, okay, according to your words, so be it.

490
00:30:26.680 --> 00:30:29.760
You're now living out what you have spoken.

491
00:30:29.840 --> 00:30:33.280
So it's not like, well, God was trying to be fickle.

492
00:30:33.280 --> 00:30:36.360
They're the ones who chose whether or not

493
00:30:36.360 --> 00:30:37.880
they wanted to be in partnership with the Lord.

494
00:30:37.880 --> 00:30:41.560
So 40 years later, the next generation,

495
00:30:41.560 --> 00:30:44.160
Moses is standing there at the beginning of Deuteronomy

496
00:30:44.160 --> 00:30:47.680
when he's about to die, about to go up to the mountain.

497
00:30:47.680 --> 00:30:50.600
I think it was Mount, I don't remember if it was Mount,

498
00:30:50.600 --> 00:30:53.720
Horeb or Mount Moriah, I don't, anyway.

499
00:30:53.720 --> 00:30:56.240
And he was about to go up to the mountain and die,

500
00:30:56.240 --> 00:30:59.240
and before he did, he urged that younger generation,

501
00:30:59.720 --> 00:31:02.000
he's like, okay, look, your people have been here before,

502
00:31:02.000 --> 00:31:03.640
your fathers were here before,

503
00:31:03.640 --> 00:31:05.520
and they didn't partner with the Lord.

504
00:31:05.520 --> 00:31:08.680
They did not agree that if they could conquer the land,

505
00:31:08.680 --> 00:31:11.080
that if God said that he'd given them the land,

506
00:31:11.080 --> 00:31:12.840
that they actually could do it.

507
00:31:12.840 --> 00:31:15.800
And he urged them, not only should they learn

508
00:31:15.800 --> 00:31:18.120
from their father's mistake,

509
00:31:18.120 --> 00:31:19.780
but also they should look at the fact

510
00:31:19.780 --> 00:31:22.520
that there were three other groups of people

511
00:31:22.520 --> 00:31:26.280
that believed that they could take the land

512
00:31:26.280 --> 00:31:29.280
from the Anakites, the Moabites, the Amorites,

513
00:31:29.280 --> 00:31:32.200
and the, yeah, Moabites, the Amorites,

514
00:31:32.200 --> 00:31:35.080
and the, or Ammonites, I think it was the Amorites,

515
00:31:35.080 --> 00:31:38.440
anyway, and then the Edomites.

516
00:31:38.440 --> 00:31:40.960
And they were not God's chosen people,

517
00:31:40.960 --> 00:31:43.440
and Moses used the Israelites' fathers

518
00:31:43.440 --> 00:31:46.840
along with these three groups of people

519
00:31:46.840 --> 00:31:49.280
who all conquered the Anakites,

520
00:31:49.280 --> 00:31:53.160
or just deviants of the Anakites.

521
00:31:54.160 --> 00:31:55.320
And he said, hey, look,

522
00:31:55.320 --> 00:31:57.680
they're not even God's chosen people.

523
00:31:57.680 --> 00:32:00.600
We're not given an indication that God even promised them

524
00:32:00.600 --> 00:32:01.760
that they could take land,

525
00:32:01.760 --> 00:32:05.120
and yet they believed that they could.

526
00:32:05.120 --> 00:32:07.440
They believed that they could receive a benefit like that

527
00:32:07.440 --> 00:32:09.280
from God, whether or not God promised him,

528
00:32:09.280 --> 00:32:10.480
because it doesn't indicate in the Bible

529
00:32:10.480 --> 00:32:11.920
that God promised him.

530
00:32:11.920 --> 00:32:14.580
But it does say that God honored the fact

531
00:32:14.580 --> 00:32:16.200
that they felt that they could do it,

532
00:32:16.200 --> 00:32:18.680
and God gave them the land.

533
00:32:18.680 --> 00:32:19.920
So he's like, hey, look,

534
00:32:19.920 --> 00:32:23.000
don't make the same mistake that your fathers did.

535
00:32:23.840 --> 00:32:25.560
These, quote-unquote, unbelievers,

536
00:32:25.560 --> 00:32:29.240
they agreed with the Lord, and they got the promise.

537
00:32:29.240 --> 00:32:31.000
And they're not even, quote-unquote, believers.

538
00:32:31.000 --> 00:32:32.600
They're not the chosen.

539
00:32:32.600 --> 00:32:36.640
So he said, so he urged them to be the ones

540
00:32:36.640 --> 00:32:37.760
that finally agreed with the Lord,

541
00:32:37.760 --> 00:32:38.840
and they chose to be so.

542
00:32:38.840 --> 00:32:40.560
And so when they went into Canaan,

543
00:32:40.560 --> 00:32:45.400
then they were able to actually conquer and take it on.

544
00:32:45.400 --> 00:32:50.400
So that's the story of both generations

545
00:32:50.800 --> 00:32:54.040
and why certain ones went in,

546
00:32:54.040 --> 00:32:58.680
and why the first ones tried to the next day

547
00:32:58.680 --> 00:33:02.920
and still couldn't, because they were living out

548
00:33:02.920 --> 00:33:04.500
what they had already declared.

549
00:33:04.500 --> 00:33:06.000
They were already living out the fact

550
00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:07.960
that they had not agreed with the Lord.

551
00:33:08.960 --> 00:33:11.200
So that's the Israelite one.

552
00:33:11.200 --> 00:33:13.760
And then I think you said that Isaiah

553
00:33:13.760 --> 00:33:17.480
was self-explanatory, but did I answer your question?

554
00:33:17.480 --> 00:33:21.400
Yeah, I just wondered if you had any other examples of that.

555
00:33:21.400 --> 00:33:24.600
But yeah, you definitely answered with those ones, for sure.

556
00:33:24.600 --> 00:33:29.600
Those, I'm trying to think if there were anything else.

557
00:33:29.880 --> 00:33:31.640
What specifically?

558
00:33:31.640 --> 00:33:33.360
Well, you know what?

559
00:33:33.360 --> 00:33:35.520
Let's look at the counter-arguments.

560
00:33:35.520 --> 00:33:39.200
So like if somebody said, well, there's the story

561
00:33:39.200 --> 00:33:42.000
in the Bible of God's purpose being realized

562
00:33:42.000 --> 00:33:45.080
even when someone didn't agree with him.

563
00:33:45.840 --> 00:33:48.240
Let's say Paul on the road to Damascus or something.

564
00:33:48.240 --> 00:33:49.720
Paul wasn't in agreement with him

565
00:33:49.720 --> 00:33:53.040
when he came down and transformed him.

566
00:33:53.040 --> 00:33:54.560
So I know that's possible.

567
00:33:54.560 --> 00:33:58.040
Most of the time in the Bible, it's about surrendering,

568
00:33:58.040 --> 00:34:00.080
but there is for sure that time.

569
00:34:00.080 --> 00:34:01.240
I don't know if there are others

570
00:34:01.240 --> 00:34:04.600
where he just kind of just changed somebody

571
00:34:04.600 --> 00:34:07.320
who wasn't ready, necessarily in agreement with him.

572
00:34:07.320 --> 00:34:11.159
So are there arguments on that,

573
00:34:11.960 --> 00:34:15.360
in that example with Paul or in others?

574
00:34:15.360 --> 00:34:20.199
So Paul, for instance, his free will was not violated.

575
00:34:20.199 --> 00:34:24.199
Jesus came to him in a very amazing way

576
00:34:24.199 --> 00:34:26.920
where he offered Paul the opportunity

577
00:34:26.920 --> 00:34:29.880
to receive him and to change.

578
00:34:29.880 --> 00:34:32.760
And Paul chose to do so.

579
00:34:32.760 --> 00:34:34.960
But Paul didn't have to.

580
00:34:34.960 --> 00:34:39.960
Jesus didn't say, hey, look, I'm gonna change you

581
00:34:40.080 --> 00:34:42.639
and you're gonna be forced to agree with me,

582
00:34:42.639 --> 00:34:44.880
forced to like me, whatever he's like.

583
00:34:44.880 --> 00:34:48.159
He's like, hey, Paul, I'm presenting myself to you.

584
00:34:48.159 --> 00:34:50.040
You don't know, but I am your bridegroom

585
00:34:50.040 --> 00:34:51.960
and you are my bride and I'm presenting myself to you

586
00:34:51.960 --> 00:34:54.960
and I'm asking, why are you persecuting me?

587
00:34:54.960 --> 00:34:58.680
And so then it ended up that Saul became blind

588
00:34:58.680 --> 00:35:00.480
and then he was there for three days.

589
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:07.360
waiting for, was it Anais? Anais, I don't remember his name. And he came and, you know,

590
00:35:07.360 --> 00:35:14.160
the scales fell from Paul's eyes. But then what did Saul say? Saul said, hey, look,

591
00:35:14.880 --> 00:35:21.680
will you baptize me? So Saul had to come into agreement in order for the Lord to change him.

592
00:35:21.680 --> 00:35:30.480
Jesus didn't like change, you know, Paul and, you know, against Paul's free will.

593
00:35:31.600 --> 00:35:36.640
He had to, Paul had to make a choice about whether or not he wanted to, he wanted to

594
00:35:36.640 --> 00:35:42.400
partner with the Lord in that. As far, okay, here's a very interesting example. Like say,

595
00:35:42.400 --> 00:35:48.400
let's use physical healing. It could be, it could go for the same as inner trauma as well.

596
00:35:48.800 --> 00:35:56.880
But physical healing, there are people that I know that have, multiple people that have been

597
00:35:56.880 --> 00:36:05.680
healed and lost their healing because someone else believed for them. And they were so excited

598
00:36:05.680 --> 00:36:10.000
that they received this miraculous healing, but they couldn't keep it. And the reason they

599
00:36:10.000 --> 00:36:15.360
couldn't keep it is because it's their land. They're the ones who have, there are certain

600
00:36:15.360 --> 00:36:21.760
agreements that if they continue to make agreements with the world, so to speak, you know,

601
00:36:21.760 --> 00:36:27.840
against the Lord, well, then the whole, then the reason why that illness came on in the first place

602
00:36:28.880 --> 00:36:33.360
is still is that reason is still there. And so the illness comes on again,

603
00:36:34.000 --> 00:36:40.080
that healing comes on again, that healing, that illness comes on again. And therefore

604
00:36:40.080 --> 00:36:44.400
they can't keep the healing. And I've heard of that happening multiple times. I personally know

605
00:36:44.400 --> 00:36:50.160
people that that's happened to, and these aren't small healing. And these are big, major,

606
00:36:50.880 --> 00:36:56.240
like life altering healings. These two of the people that I'm thinking of were on bedrest.

607
00:36:56.880 --> 00:37:04.240
I mean, they were not bedrest. They were bedridden, not bedrest for pregnancy. They were

608
00:37:04.240 --> 00:37:11.600
bedridden and they were healed and they lost their healing. They kept it for a little bit.

609
00:37:11.600 --> 00:37:16.720
And then because they themselves had made agreements that they hadn't changed,

610
00:37:16.720 --> 00:37:22.480
then, you know, in their inner healing, then those same traumas, then their body manifested those

611
00:37:22.480 --> 00:37:28.800
same traumas again, as far as inner healing, the same thing would go with inner healing that,

612
00:37:29.760 --> 00:37:34.400
you know, say for instance, you know, someone could, the Lord could come in and do a mighty

613
00:37:34.400 --> 00:37:39.600
work, you know, as he does in some churches, you know, people will go into, go into a church,

614
00:37:39.600 --> 00:37:44.160
someone will pray for him. And all of a sudden they just, the blinders come off,

615
00:37:44.160 --> 00:37:48.240
the scales come off their eyes, and they just feel rejuvenated and joyful or whatever,

616
00:37:48.240 --> 00:37:55.600
but they can continue to choose out of habit to make, to come at it from their old mindset

617
00:37:55.600 --> 00:38:02.720
and their old perspective. And because even if they're not triggered, they can choose,

618
00:38:02.720 --> 00:38:06.720
like say, for instance, they go into a situation that normally they would have been triggered in,

619
00:38:06.720 --> 00:38:13.040
say, for instance, they're not triggered. However, they're in so much of a habit of mindset

620
00:38:13.040 --> 00:38:18.320
of how to view and handle those types of situations that they come into agreement

621
00:38:18.320 --> 00:38:24.400
with something again, and then continue to do it because their mind hasn't been renewed.

622
00:38:24.400 --> 00:38:33.040
They themselves didn't come into agreement with something new. They, they were just miraculously,

623
00:38:33.040 --> 00:38:36.880
they were just miraculously healed of a particular trauma.

624
00:38:36.880 --> 00:38:42.240
There are traumas that I've been healed from that to a particular measure that if I'm not,

625
00:38:42.240 --> 00:38:47.920
if I do not, if I do not continue to stay in agreement with what God, where God has brought

626
00:38:47.920 --> 00:38:57.120
me so far, I can revert because I'm choosing to, again, pick up old agreements again. So anyway.

627
00:38:57.760 --> 00:39:00.960
Yeah. Those were awesome examples. Thank you.

628
00:39:05.760 --> 00:39:11.600
Carrie, how you doing? I meant, I meant to get back to you both yesterday and today,

629
00:39:11.600 --> 00:39:14.560
and I'm so sorry. I promise I haven't forgotten you.

630
00:39:16.560 --> 00:39:21.200
No, that's totally fine. I am doing better today.

631
00:39:21.280 --> 00:39:26.800
I am. If we don't get taken care of, but anything that you need for me on this call,

632
00:39:26.800 --> 00:39:30.240
I will Marco Polo you. I promise. I promise. I did not forget.

633
00:39:30.880 --> 00:39:35.600
It's totally fine. I think I have multiple people to get back to, including Alana.

634
00:39:36.560 --> 00:39:40.160
So unless I actually just answered your question, Alana, you're going to have to remind me if I

635
00:39:40.160 --> 00:39:46.480
answered your Marco Polo question. No, the Marco Polo was like different. It was a whole different

636
00:39:46.640 --> 00:39:54.640
topic. I think. Okay. Okay. Well, I'll get back to your Marco Polo too.

637
00:39:55.840 --> 00:39:59.840
Because the group is getting bigger now and it's not just private sessions.

638
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:08.120
And it's it's also Marco Polo's and the Marco Polo's are not something that I offer as part of the part of the program.

639
00:40:08.640 --> 00:40:23.760
So that's why it's just kind of like I asked for y'all's grace that it's just something that and that I offer to y'all of whenever I can get to it. I'll get to it, but it's not part of the program. And so just so and anyway, so that's why just

640
00:40:24.520 --> 00:40:32.120
It was sometimes it might take me a bit longer with the group so big. Now I'm only able to get to so many people so quickly. So I'm very sorry.

641
00:40:33.400 --> 00:40:34.040
All good.

642
00:40:37.640 --> 00:40:38.320
Does

643
00:40:39.720 --> 00:40:49.240
Anyone have anything else I there was something that I was thinking of, but I think I talked about it last time and

644
00:40:49.240 --> 00:40:49.920
And

645
00:40:51.920 --> 00:40:58.440
And you know what, there might be one other thing y'all let me know. I don't know if you if you're still going to be able to see me if I switch screens.

646
00:41:00.360 --> 00:41:01.240
You can tell me

647
00:41:02.240 --> 00:41:03.200
Can y'all still see me.

648
00:41:08.280 --> 00:41:09.320
Can y'all still see me.

649
00:41:09.520 --> 00:41:12.000
We don't picture. We see your picture just

650
00:41:12.520 --> 00:41:16.920
Picture. Okay, sorry. So I'm just looking back at something really

651
00:41:17.680 --> 00:41:23.600
And really quickly to just in case no one has anything. Oh, there it is. Okay.

652
00:41:24.720 --> 00:41:30.840
Okay, I had to remind myself of the other thing that I wanted to and that I could bring up if

653
00:41:32.440 --> 00:41:35.080
If someone else didn't have anything.

654
00:41:36.280 --> 00:41:36.680
So,

655
00:41:37.440 --> 00:41:48.680
Well, it looks like no one has anything. So I'll just jump right in. Y'all, y'all feel free to like a new yourselves if you and if you think of something you want to ask, um, the

656
00:41:50.200 --> 00:41:53.080
One of the things that I'm learning how to do and I feel

657
00:41:54.480 --> 00:41:56.640
I'm an answer. I don't

658
00:41:57.760 --> 00:41:59.200
I don't and

659
00:41:59.400 --> 00:42:00.760
I don't and

660
00:42:01.800 --> 00:42:10.360
I'm very careful about telling y'all things that making sure that the things I tell you are things that I am living

661
00:42:11.000 --> 00:42:18.280
And that I've internalized that I've owned in my own relationship and I walk out as opposed to all of these things that I'm hearing other people say

662
00:42:18.640 --> 00:42:23.240
And then I think it's a really good teaching and therefore I'm just like parroting and back to you.

663
00:42:23.760 --> 00:42:36.240
And so, so understand that this is something new that I'm actually walking in, but I the Lord's teaching me how to do it, but I feel sure enough that it's right.

664
00:42:36.800 --> 00:42:47.800
That I'm putting my bet that I'm living like this now and but I'm very new at it. So I don't really have much to say about it. It's just something that I kind of want to put out there.

665
00:42:48.360 --> 00:43:00.840
As as something for y'all to kind of like to on just like I'm chewing on it and I'm already I'm already stepping out on it and actively and that is the fact that and

666
00:43:02.320 --> 00:43:04.200
I am coming to

667
00:43:05.200 --> 00:43:19.360
I'm beginning. Okay, so I have lived my life trying extremely hard to avoid at all costs and making sub optimal decisions so

668
00:43:20.960 --> 00:43:24.560
Decisions that are good, but they're not best

669
00:43:24.560 --> 00:43:39.240
And I have realized just I think the Lord's just kind of hit me over the head with it. The past like few maybe week, I guess. This was something that I'm that a friend of mine shared with me.

670
00:43:40.640 --> 00:43:43.360
About is exactly a week ago last Thursday.

671
00:43:43.360 --> 00:43:56.560
About, about the fact that because I have made I've lived my life. I've lived my life so stifled because I didn't want to do anything below God's best

672
00:43:57.560 --> 00:44:12.960
I didn't want to do anything below God's best. But the problem is that that means, though, often that I'm not partnering with the Lord and bringing my own heart to the table to be considered

673
00:44:14.040 --> 00:44:25.960
And you know something that in other words, my own heart, meaning my own contribution like in and of myself. Hey, Lord, you know, you've come up with ideas that will. Here's my idea. What do we think about this.

674
00:44:26.600 --> 00:44:39.720
Um, and so that that's one of the problems with me living life like that and being so afraid of making sub optimal decisions that I end up just being quiet and just trying to wait for

675
00:44:40.040 --> 00:44:51.920
Whatever it is, he said, and then I and I and I freeze in there and I don't move forward and I don't move backward. Well, God can more easily steer a ship that is moving

676
00:44:51.920 --> 00:44:59.880
Than one that's not. Same thing with it, you know, we always talk about like a parked car. It's easier for God to to move

677
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:04.040
to steer a parked car when the car is moving.

678
00:45:04.040 --> 00:45:07.560
Otherwise, the car just doesn't add change.

679
00:45:07.560 --> 00:45:10.560
If it's just parked and he can turn the wheel however way he wants it.

680
00:45:10.560 --> 00:45:11.640
But if we're not moving, well,

681
00:45:11.640 --> 00:45:13.240
we're not going to head in a different direction.

682
00:45:13.240 --> 00:45:15.640
We're just going to stay right where we are.

683
00:45:15.960 --> 00:45:24.280
Then the other thing is that the other problem with the suboptimal decisions is,

684
00:45:24.280 --> 00:45:26.680
yeah, I'm not moving.

685
00:45:26.680 --> 00:45:28.520
Oh, well, no. Sorry, I did mention them both.

686
00:45:28.520 --> 00:45:29.520
I'm not moving.

687
00:45:29.520 --> 00:45:32.640
And then the other thing was that I'm not bringing myself to the table.

688
00:45:32.640 --> 00:45:39.320
So what I'm now learning to do is I'm now learning how to just make a decision

689
00:45:39.320 --> 00:45:41.560
and then calling God good.

690
00:45:41.560 --> 00:45:44.120
Okay, God, I believe that you're good.

691
00:45:44.120 --> 00:45:50.440
I believe that your character is good and loving,

692
00:45:50.440 --> 00:45:53.520
that you are good and you are loved.

693
00:45:53.520 --> 00:45:58.960
And I'm discovering, Lord, and I'm having you reveal to me

694
00:45:58.960 --> 00:46:01.280
to what degree you are love and good.

695
00:46:01.280 --> 00:46:05.200
What does love and good from you look like?

696
00:46:05.200 --> 00:46:11.280
What does it look like, period, before it even manifests into the earth?

697
00:46:11.280 --> 00:46:13.360
What does it look like?

698
00:46:13.360 --> 00:46:15.000
And how good are you?

699
00:46:15.000 --> 00:46:16.280
How much love are you?

700
00:46:16.280 --> 00:46:22.960
And then as we extend that, Lord, what does that look like manifested into my life?

701
00:46:22.960 --> 00:46:25.440
What is it that I can,

702
00:46:25.440 --> 00:46:31.200
what is it that I should have enough bravery to believe will happen?

703
00:46:31.200 --> 00:46:37.600
And enough bravery to step into to what decision should I start making?

704
00:46:37.600 --> 00:46:40.080
Because you'll back me up on them.

705
00:46:40.080 --> 00:46:44.080
And I don't mean that I'm making that, I'm saying,

706
00:46:44.080 --> 00:46:46.000
oh, we should just be making all these decisions

707
00:46:46.000 --> 00:46:49.360
to do whatever we want out of our soul, you know,

708
00:46:49.360 --> 00:46:51.840
which is trying so hard to protect and provide for us,

709
00:46:52.640 --> 00:46:54.320
believing that God's not doing that,

710
00:46:54.320 --> 00:46:59.200
and God will just back us up on the fact that we're trying to live life on our own.

711
00:46:59.200 --> 00:47:02.560
I'm not talking about making decisions from that perspective,

712
00:47:04.480 --> 00:47:11.200
but understanding that at the same time that God is fathering me into how to be a king,

713
00:47:11.760 --> 00:47:14.400
how to make kingly decisions,

714
00:47:14.400 --> 00:47:21.040
not to be a robot or a parrot that parrots what everything he says and has no voice.

715
00:47:21.840 --> 00:47:24.160
He's teaching me to look like him,

716
00:47:24.800 --> 00:47:30.560
but making my own decisions and executing those decisions.

717
00:47:30.560 --> 00:47:32.400
And when I execute those decisions,

718
00:47:32.400 --> 00:47:35.200
they're the same type of thing that my father would do.

719
00:47:35.200 --> 00:47:36.960
That is what he's fathering me into.

720
00:47:37.840 --> 00:47:40.480
So therefore, in order to learn how to do that,

721
00:47:40.480 --> 00:47:43.120
it's the same thing that a child has to learn how to do.

722
00:47:43.120 --> 00:47:44.960
They have to start making their own decisions.

723
00:47:46.640 --> 00:47:51.200
A friend of mine uses the example of shoes.

724
00:47:51.200 --> 00:47:54.160
He says that, okay, well, when you're really, really little,

725
00:47:54.160 --> 00:47:55.520
you don't get to pick your shoes,

726
00:47:55.520 --> 00:47:57.200
and your parents just say, these are your shoes,

727
00:47:57.200 --> 00:47:58.240
and these are the ones you're going to wear.

728
00:47:58.800 --> 00:48:02.480
Then as you get a little bit older, then they give you two choices.

729
00:48:02.480 --> 00:48:05.120
You can wear these shoes or you can wear these shoes.

730
00:48:05.120 --> 00:48:06.400
Mommy, I want to wear those shoes.

731
00:48:06.400 --> 00:48:08.080
No, we can't wear those shoes today.

732
00:48:08.080 --> 00:48:09.840
These shoes or these shoes.

733
00:48:10.960 --> 00:48:16.800
And so it expands a child's ability to choose for themselves,

734
00:48:16.800 --> 00:48:19.200
okay, what is it that I want?

735
00:48:19.200 --> 00:48:21.440
Do I want the red today or the blue?

736
00:48:22.400 --> 00:48:24.240
I can't get the yellow today.

737
00:48:24.240 --> 00:48:27.680
I don't know why mom won't let me wear galoshes,

738
00:48:27.680 --> 00:48:31.200
but she says I can't, and I have to pick one of these others.

739
00:48:31.200 --> 00:48:34.320
So it restricts our decision-making ability

740
00:48:34.320 --> 00:48:36.160
so that we don't hurt ourselves,

741
00:48:37.760 --> 00:48:41.520
but we still have the ability to learn how to make decisions.

742
00:48:41.520 --> 00:48:44.400
Then as we get older, then we can go to a store,

743
00:48:44.400 --> 00:48:46.960
and our parents ask, which shoes do you want to buy?

744
00:48:47.920 --> 00:48:49.200
And then we learn how to do that.

745
00:48:49.200 --> 00:48:51.600
And eventually, we've learned how to make decisions

746
00:48:51.600 --> 00:48:52.880
to the point, you know, failing.

747
00:48:54.000 --> 00:48:55.280
I don't want to say failing,

748
00:48:55.280 --> 00:48:59.520
but like where we've hurt ourselves in making wrong shoe choices,

749
00:49:00.640 --> 00:49:03.360
and our parents just kind of let us live with the consequences.

750
00:49:03.360 --> 00:49:07.040
Like, are you sure that you want to go out there like that?

751
00:49:07.040 --> 00:49:08.800
Like a kid going out without a coat,

752
00:49:09.920 --> 00:49:12.560
and you're like, hey, look, you really need a coat on.

753
00:49:12.560 --> 00:49:14.560
Well, once they get to be a teenager,

754
00:49:14.560 --> 00:49:16.400
you don't force them to wear the coat.

755
00:49:16.960 --> 00:49:18.400
You might harass them,

756
00:49:18.400 --> 00:49:21.760
and certain mothers might harass them to wear the coat.

757
00:49:21.760 --> 00:49:24.000
But a teenager gets to the point where it's just like,

758
00:49:24.000 --> 00:49:26.240
okay, we're going to let them suffer the consequences.

759
00:49:26.240 --> 00:49:27.440
They say they don't need a coat.

760
00:49:27.440 --> 00:49:29.120
I know they're going out on a hayride tonight,

761
00:49:29.120 --> 00:49:31.840
and I know it's expected to get down in the 40s.

762
00:49:31.840 --> 00:49:34.560
They're going to learn next time to watch the weather.

763
00:49:34.560 --> 00:49:35.680
They're going to learn to do all this.

764
00:49:35.680 --> 00:49:37.520
I've taught them how to make good decisions,

765
00:49:37.520 --> 00:49:40.000
and they're choosing voluntarily

766
00:49:40.000 --> 00:49:41.440
to make this particular decision.

767
00:49:42.160 --> 00:49:44.960
So they're going to learn in a protected environment

768
00:49:44.960 --> 00:49:46.800
where they're not going to get frostbite.

769
00:49:46.800 --> 00:49:49.840
That next time they need to be making better decisions.

770
00:49:49.840 --> 00:49:51.440
So it's just this process.

771
00:49:51.440 --> 00:49:53.040
Well, God does the same thing with us.

772
00:49:54.800 --> 00:49:58.080
So that means that he gets to the point

773
00:49:58.080 --> 00:49:59.840
where I make my own decisions.

774
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:06.000
so to speak, and I don't always have to sit there waiting for what is he going to say next and

775
00:50:06.720 --> 00:50:12.800
And and and not move until he says something he's teaching me how to make decisions

776
00:50:12.920 --> 00:50:16.080
So therefore I have to make decisions

777
00:50:16.840 --> 00:50:23.200
So what I do is so I'm not so much afraid of making so optimal decisions

778
00:50:23.840 --> 00:50:28.520
I'm still very concerned about it, but to be perfectly transparent and honest

779
00:50:28.520 --> 00:50:31.280
But my point is I'm actually making them. That's my point

780
00:50:31.280 --> 00:50:38.800
I'm actually making decisions that I'm not sure if they're suboptimal or not. My point is I'm risking it and

781
00:50:39.480 --> 00:50:41.160
I'm that's not normal for me

782
00:50:41.160 --> 00:50:49.360
I'm not used to risking the fact that I might not make the best decision and this may not be God's quote-unquote best

783
00:50:49.880 --> 00:50:53.680
Because I've now decided that it is more important to me

784
00:50:54.320 --> 00:51:00.920
To have a living, breathing, life-giving relationship with a being and

785
00:51:02.400 --> 00:51:08.120
allow him to father me into who it is that he says that he wants me to be as

786
00:51:08.640 --> 00:51:10.040
opposed to

787
00:51:10.040 --> 00:51:11.960
living life

788
00:51:11.960 --> 00:51:15.320
Checking all of these boxes and hitting all these milestones

789
00:51:15.920 --> 00:51:20.040
Because he's showing me that is my life

790
00:51:20.040 --> 00:51:26.080
My life isn't this set thing of all of these checkboxes and all these milestones. I'm supposed to pass

791
00:51:27.600 --> 00:51:35.040
But that you know have been dictated in heaven prior to this it's like no I want you to have a living, breathing,

792
00:51:36.800 --> 00:51:42.480
life-giving relationship with me and the way that you do that is you flow

793
00:51:43.360 --> 00:51:50.440
It's not static. You don't have this list that you're checking off, etc. But he's doing this in

794
00:51:51.320 --> 00:51:57.320
phases for me. He's currently what the Lord's doing right now is I don't know if we're on the like

795
00:51:57.760 --> 00:52:05.440
the two-shoes step or if we're like a whole, you know, like a small section of the store and he's like, okay, well

796
00:52:06.080 --> 00:52:10.480
You know as long as it's in your size, you know

797
00:52:10.480 --> 00:52:13.320
And as long as it's a sneaker you can pick from these ten

798
00:52:13.320 --> 00:52:15.720
I don't know which phase that I'm in whatever it is

799
00:52:15.720 --> 00:52:22.480
I'm in a particular phase where he's not just giving you the shoes and he's saying these are the only shoes you can wear

800
00:52:22.840 --> 00:52:28.520
He does sometimes sometimes he'll tell me point like Ashley. I'd like you to do this. I'd like us to do this together

801
00:52:28.520 --> 00:52:31.160
I'd like us to go to this particular place together

802
00:52:31.480 --> 00:52:36.960
So now I I just made a decision that I'm gonna go back to Colorado

803
00:52:37.040 --> 00:52:40.640
I left Colorado a few days ago, and I'm going back to Colorado because

804
00:52:41.640 --> 00:52:42.800
I

805
00:52:42.800 --> 00:52:44.800
was given an invitation

806
00:52:45.720 --> 00:52:47.960
somebody I've never met has a

807
00:52:48.600 --> 00:52:55.800
Has a really her grandparents have a really nice chalet in in mountains, and I do not know this person

808
00:52:56.020 --> 00:52:58.320
She's friends of a friend of a friend

809
00:52:59.200 --> 00:53:04.600
That's how far back this goes and she heard some things about me. Apparently she's going through a phase

810
00:53:05.120 --> 00:53:07.560
A phase a season and transition with the Lord

811
00:53:08.120 --> 00:53:12.840
That I'm not sure if it's a season. I've been through or that I'm going through my friend

812
00:53:12.840 --> 00:53:14.040
Just explained all of this to me

813
00:53:14.040 --> 00:53:18.800
And so I was actually planning to head across the southern United States towards the East Coast

814
00:53:18.880 --> 00:53:23.840
That was the new trip that I was planning suddenly this random person

815
00:53:24.400 --> 00:53:28.360
You know that hears about me from through from a friend from friend from friend

816
00:53:28.800 --> 00:53:34.600
She invites this woman that she doesn't know to come up and stay with her and her girlfriends for a week

817
00:53:34.600 --> 00:53:40.920
And so that we can we can talk about stuff and just meet and whatever. So I told the Lord it's like, okay God, I

818
00:53:41.560 --> 00:53:43.560
Don't know what you want me to do

819
00:53:43.800 --> 00:53:50.080
But it in truth with this whole thing that kind of came up out of nowhere is very intriguing to me

820
00:53:50.360 --> 00:53:52.360
Because it's a very interesting situation

821
00:53:52.800 --> 00:53:54.800
So I want to see how you

822
00:53:56.280 --> 00:53:58.280
So I'm gonna follow it

823
00:53:58.360 --> 00:54:00.840
And I'm interested to see how you show up in it

824
00:54:01.760 --> 00:54:07.920
That's what I told him. I'm just interested in seeing Lord who you are when I do that. I

825
00:54:08.520 --> 00:54:10.080
Don't know what's gonna happen

826
00:54:10.080 --> 00:54:14.400
I don't know if I didn't get there and the Lord's just gonna be like Ashley

827
00:54:14.400 --> 00:54:19.360
Yeah, you shouldn't have done that or if he's gonna be like, yes Ashley see I'm gonna prove to you

828
00:54:19.360 --> 00:54:23.080
I'm gonna prove to you while you're here that these are the types of decisions

829
00:54:23.080 --> 00:54:27.640
I want you to make but see even when I go I'm still gonna be kind of wondering

830
00:54:27.920 --> 00:54:30.040
okay, so what element of

831
00:54:31.120 --> 00:54:34.760
The decision and the situation and how I made the decision

832
00:54:35.240 --> 00:54:39.840
Worked out this way because understand it's a relationship. It's not a formula

833
00:54:40.360 --> 00:54:44.680
So it's not like there's this particular formula. I need to be working out

834
00:54:44.680 --> 00:54:48.560
I'm getting to know the the being that I'm married to

835
00:54:49.680 --> 00:54:51.680
that's what I'm getting to know and

836
00:54:51.680 --> 00:54:58.480
And so I that's just something new that I am learning and in stepping out big-time because

837
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:03.160
I am going out to a place I've never been before.

838
00:55:03.160 --> 00:55:07.400
And with a person that I've never, in people, she's spotted some girlfriends that I have

839
00:55:07.400 --> 00:55:10.520
never met.

840
00:55:10.520 --> 00:55:18.040
And there are all kinds of other factors that I'm aware of that in my life going on right

841
00:55:18.040 --> 00:55:22.280
now that could be affected by me being there.

842
00:55:22.280 --> 00:55:24.040
I'm like, I don't know.

843
00:55:24.040 --> 00:55:25.240
I don't know what's going to happen.

844
00:55:25.240 --> 00:55:28.200
I don't know how the Lord is going to show up.

845
00:55:28.200 --> 00:55:30.160
But I'm like, Lord, I want to know you.

846
00:55:30.160 --> 00:55:31.520
So I'm going to go there.

847
00:55:31.520 --> 00:55:36.760
And I'm going to see who you are in me traveling there, me traveling 14 hours to get there

848
00:55:36.760 --> 00:55:42.240
one shot, and then being there for a week, meeting people I don't know, and being alone

849
00:55:42.240 --> 00:55:43.240
with them.

850
00:55:43.240 --> 00:55:44.240
I don't know.

851
00:55:44.240 --> 00:55:48.400
It's gonna be like that, Lord, I want to see who you are and how you talk to me and and

852
00:55:48.400 --> 00:55:49.400
all of that.

853
00:55:49.400 --> 00:55:54.440
So this for this, for y'all may not be a big deal, these types of decisions.

854
00:55:54.440 --> 00:55:57.120
For me, I don't make decisions like that.

855
00:55:57.120 --> 00:56:02.360
I only move if God says so and if he said and if he doesn't say so, I assume the answer

856
00:56:02.360 --> 00:56:03.360
is no.

857
00:56:03.360 --> 00:56:06.400
So it's been a very stifled, stifled life.

858
00:56:06.400 --> 00:56:11.280
So I don't have much to tell y'all about all of that as far as like how to do this in your

859
00:56:11.280 --> 00:56:12.880
own lives.

860
00:56:12.880 --> 00:56:18.480
I'm just wanting to give you, for one thing, some insight into something that I'm walking

861
00:56:18.480 --> 00:56:23.000
through while I'm in the middle of it, so that you know, when I'm telling you things

862
00:56:23.000 --> 00:56:27.800
that that feel like, oh my word, Ashley, do you know how much of a risk that is for

863
00:56:27.800 --> 00:56:28.800
me?

864
00:56:28.800 --> 00:56:30.040
Do you know how much of a sacrifice that is for me?

865
00:56:30.040 --> 00:56:31.040
Do you know whatever?

866
00:56:31.040 --> 00:56:36.480
Like, I wanted y'all to know some things while I'm going through them of like, yeah, I'm

867
00:56:36.480 --> 00:56:41.040
living certain, I'm living things out right now.

868
00:56:41.040 --> 00:56:46.440
And for each of us, the decisions that I or each of you make, is the risk is going to

869
00:56:46.440 --> 00:56:47.760
feel different.

870
00:56:47.760 --> 00:56:51.400
Certain things are going to feel like a bigger risk to me than they are going to be to any

871
00:56:51.400 --> 00:56:53.440
of y'all and vice versa.

872
00:56:53.440 --> 00:56:58.640
But the point is, so there that I wanted to mention it for that reason.

873
00:56:58.640 --> 00:57:04.720
And then I also, it was just something new that God is, that God is just has on my heart

874
00:57:04.720 --> 00:57:09.160
that I am learning to own and I've owned it in belief.

875
00:57:09.160 --> 00:57:15.600
I am choosing that this is true, but now I'm walking it out to actually see how the word

876
00:57:15.600 --> 00:57:20.840
shows up like that, to have him flesh this idea out for me.

877
00:57:21.280 --> 00:57:27.040
And, and that is what I've just explained about suboptimal decisions, plus the whole

878
00:57:27.040 --> 00:57:36.480
idea of calling God good and stepping out on believing that he's good is actually more

879
00:57:36.480 --> 00:57:44.080
valuable to him in my relationship with him than hearing and obeying.

880
00:57:44.080 --> 00:57:48.600
I don't know about for y'all, that is not the theology that I grew up with.

881
00:57:48.600 --> 00:57:56.480
And that's very, it feels very extreme to me, feels very, very different, but my God

882
00:57:56.480 --> 00:57:59.400
operates so very differently.

883
00:57:59.400 --> 00:58:06.480
I'm discovering than I ever believed that he up to this point, you know, that he did.

884
00:58:06.480 --> 00:58:14.240
And so anyway, I just, I'm, like I said, I'm just stepping out and learning to own the

885
00:58:14.240 --> 00:58:21.840
fact that he's more pleased by me calling him good in my life and calling him to show

886
00:58:21.840 --> 00:58:27.360
up in whatever good and love looks like, which I don't get to dictate to him.

887
00:58:27.360 --> 00:58:30.120
I don't get to dictate, Lord, I'm going to do all these things and I want you to make

888
00:58:30.120 --> 00:58:32.000
them work for me just smoothly.

889
00:58:32.000 --> 00:58:33.720
I don't get to do that.

890
00:58:33.720 --> 00:58:36.840
I just tell him, Lord, I'm going to, I'm calling you good.

891
00:58:36.840 --> 00:58:41.040
I'm saying you are good and you are loved and you are more so than to any degree that

892
00:58:41.040 --> 00:58:43.680
I have believed thus far.

893
00:58:43.680 --> 00:58:47.640
And I'm asking that you just, that you show up in my life like that.

894
00:58:47.640 --> 00:58:50.560
And I don't know what good and love looks like.

895
00:58:50.560 --> 00:58:53.780
I don't, it might be that this thing works out.

896
00:58:53.780 --> 00:59:00.640
It might be that this thing doesn't work out so smoothly, but whatever it is, I'm asking

897
00:59:00.640 --> 00:59:05.420
that you just reveal whatever good and love of your character actually looks like.

898
00:59:05.420 --> 00:59:11.440
And I'm choosing that you desire more of a relationship with me than for me to strictly

899
00:59:11.440 --> 00:59:16.600
hear and obey you, that you're more pleased with me standing on your character and declaring

900
00:59:16.600 --> 00:59:21.680
you to be good in love and to step out in all of my decisions because I believe that

901
00:59:21.680 --> 00:59:28.600
you're good and you're loved than you wanting me to strictly hear and obey.

902
00:59:28.600 --> 00:59:33.880
So anyway, I know that that's really not anything that I can tell y'all like, oh, well, this

903
00:59:33.880 --> 00:59:34.880
is how you do it.

904
00:59:34.880 --> 00:59:39.440
I'm doing it right now, so I'm figuring it out.

905
00:59:39.440 --> 00:59:44.600
But I just thought that maybe it was, it was something new that I'm learning and was just

906
00:59:44.600 --> 00:59:46.960
kind of introduced that idea.

907
00:59:46.960 --> 00:59:52.000
I was just basically introduced to that idea in these words about a week ago, in fact,

908
00:59:52.000 --> 00:59:53.760
exactly a week ago last Thursday.

909
00:59:53.760 --> 00:59:59.640
So like I mentioned, so there's that.

910
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:08.120
So oh and it is already almost almost an hour, but I'm did anybody and have anything and for before we be

911
01:00:12.720 --> 01:00:16.840
Don't everybody talk at once. I can't hear you all on top of each other. I

912
01:00:18.080 --> 01:00:20.920
Already had my turn for half an hour, so I'm good

913
01:00:20.920 --> 01:00:22.920
All right

914
01:00:25.600 --> 01:00:32.640
Okay, well it's good to see all of y'all and I'm Steph I'm so glad that you're doing good and after your

915
01:00:33.200 --> 01:00:37.480
After your eyes surgery yesterday. It was yesterday, right Wednesday

916
01:00:37.920 --> 01:00:40.000
Yeah yesterday. Yeah good

917
01:00:40.000 --> 01:00:41.640
I'm glad that you're doing good

918
01:00:41.640 --> 01:00:48.120
And I know you probably need to go get a pain meds unless you grabbed them because she said you needed them within 30 minutes

919
01:00:49.120 --> 01:00:51.120
Yeah, okay

920
01:00:55.920 --> 01:01:02.280
No, I'm not too far from bed. Anyway, so I should be okay. Oh good. You probably hear puppies fighting in the background

921
01:01:02.280 --> 01:01:04.840
So as soon as the big girls come down to take them. I'm out

922
01:01:06.840 --> 01:01:08.040
Oh

923
01:01:08.040 --> 01:01:09.200
Yeah

924
01:01:09.200 --> 01:01:17.420
And Carrie and it's good to see you too. I will jump on Marco Polo and answer you. I apologize. You wouldn't think that

925
01:01:18.120 --> 01:01:20.120
I'd be busy, but I am

926
01:01:20.760 --> 01:01:22.760
So every time I like hit home base

927
01:01:23.200 --> 01:01:26.840
Okay, rally the troops before and he and I had I've had like

928
01:01:27.720 --> 01:01:34.120
Contacts with that clients and whatever since I've been back. And so anyway, sorry, I'm trying to squeeze everything in

929
01:01:36.240 --> 01:01:38.960
That's totally fine take your time I totally understand

930
01:01:40.320 --> 01:01:42.320
And good just oops

931
01:01:42.440 --> 01:01:42.940
Sorry.

932
01:01:43.960 --> 01:01:52.440
There we go. And I get to see you, Ilana. I'm so glad that everything went well and for this weekend and and by the way, those if y'all

933
01:01:53.400 --> 01:02:02.000
If y'all aren't Facebook friends with Ilana, you should be. You should go see all of her cute birthday party pictures from her little five year old of a is

934
01:02:02.440 --> 01:02:10.040
Birthday where she had to they were both very colorful the unicorn birthday party and then a and then a

935
01:02:10.440 --> 01:02:12.800
princess, you know, Disney princesses and

936
01:02:13.600 --> 01:02:16.960
Birthday party. So so Elsa showed up

937
01:02:19.320 --> 01:02:25.640
Yeah, we we had a limit all of a sudden imposed on Saturday morning of 10 people so

938
01:02:26.520 --> 01:02:35.000
We we change the switch things around and it worked out really well. And we had two parties and then on her actual birthday on Tuesday, we had another little party three of us and then

939
01:02:35.560 --> 01:02:42.280
The three neighbors. They couldn't come over on the weekend because the numbers would be too high came over tonight for a fourth party.

940
01:02:43.960 --> 01:02:44.680
So she is

941
01:02:45.840 --> 01:02:51.040
She is partied out now I think she's probably good until her next birthday, so

942
01:02:52.160 --> 01:02:53.720
We think that's

943
01:02:53.840 --> 01:02:54.520
Exciting.

944
01:02:55.000 --> 01:03:06.360
Yeah, it's new stuff special stuff after all of this pandemic. I mean, nobody should be staying staying at home, you know, when they're on on their fifth year, you know,

945
01:03:06.880 --> 01:03:07.240
Well,

946
01:03:08.320 --> 01:03:13.200
She talked about her birthday almost every day this year since she turned four.

947
01:03:13.640 --> 01:03:18.440
It was her birthday. It was someone's birthday every day. When's my birthday. How long till my birthday so

948
01:03:19.360 --> 01:03:27.640
It finally came and you know she's been isolated quite a bit. And she's an only child. So it's just nice to give her that opportunity and

949
01:03:28.640 --> 01:03:29.640
Yeah, so thanks.

950
01:03:30.680 --> 01:03:31.080
Yeah.

951
01:03:32.800 --> 01:03:33.960
Well, y'all did a good job.

952
01:03:35.640 --> 01:03:37.280
I wanted a birthday like that man.

953
01:03:37.640 --> 01:03:38.000
Somebody

954
01:03:38.760 --> 01:03:39.280
Like that.

955
01:03:39.480 --> 01:03:41.600
One day when you're allowed to come to Canada.

956
01:03:42.560 --> 01:04:00.400
It's that's right. Actually, you know, the last time that I had a Amanda, my, my best friend. She threw me a really what felt like to me. It was a really big birthday party. She threw me a full blown tea party. Tell you what, nicest tea party. I've ever been to. It was my birthday. I drank out of

957
01:04:01.400 --> 01:04:13.400
A drink out of that Carrie sent me a beautiful Royal Albert teacup and saucer and several months ago. And so I had it in time for my birthday and we use my teacup collection for the

958
01:04:13.880 --> 01:04:29.680
To all drink tea out of and I drank out of Amanda asked me which which teacups you want to drink out of. I was like, obviously the Royal Albert when they carry just gave me. So anyway, it's very, very special and special time so

959
01:04:30.920 --> 01:04:31.600
Very special day

960
01:04:32.040 --> 01:04:33.600
That's awesome. Love it.

961
01:04:34.400 --> 01:04:50.040
Well, good to see all of y'all and and I guess I will see y'all next week I will should be in Colorado and next week for for our meeting. So anyway, let's get to see y'all. I'll see y'all later.

962
01:04:50.320 --> 01:04:51.120
Hey, bye.

963
01:04:51.520 --> 01:04:52.040
Bye.