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Sorry for how I look.

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We are driving, and where are we we're right outside of Atlanta. And so the guys are stopped at some kind of place to put my phone where I don't have to hold it for an hour.

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I don't know, I'm in the moving van I'm in the U-Haul.

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I don't think I can do that so I might have to just.

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Oh, there we go. Y'all can see me just fine this way I wanted to make sure y'all had some light on me so you could see who was talking.

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But anyway, so the guys are in Chick-fil-a. I'm eating their food and enjoying getting to sit somewhere other than the car for, for a while.

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Yeah, I grabbed Chick-fil-a, and I ordered it so it's gonna hold it for me and I'll have it afterwards so we, I think we got on the road it.

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I think 230 something like that and so we have not made a single stop.

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So anyway, drove straight through.

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So good gas mileage.

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So, how is it going.

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Good.

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Are you going to drive all night.

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No, no, but the guys did say that they wanted to drive a bit further.

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Because it's about 17 hours. You know, 16 and a half. No, no 17 Yes, but it depends on the time is whether or not it's 16 and a half or 17 and a half anyway it's around 17 average, and they wanted to get a bit further down the road so tomorrow wouldn't be as long.

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So they said that they wanted to just stop for the hour that the rest group and then they wanted to push on a bit before we found a hotel to stop at so.

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So, looks like Karen is not joining us tonight for a very good reason very excited to hear that she's getting to spend time with her husband.

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And so in Diana may jump on in just a little bit but we didn't get to do rest group last week, or because it was in the middle of the Valentine's Night for so many and so it's been a couple of weeks I guess.

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So I'll just hop off and y'all can just catch up and everything. And well I say that you know what I've done before is I do this, and with the, with the Norway group you know the international group is since it's just the two of them they didn't want

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it's just the two of them they're like, well, you know, what did you purchase it was not that they didn't want to it's just that they're like well actually my goodness you know let's let's make this more fun let's have, let's have you on.

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And so I think what I'll do is I'll pop off for a bit, and then I might pop on a bit earlier than maybe usual so if it's just a TV hopefully Diana they'll join us soon.

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So, anyway, I'm here if you need anything.

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Hey, I can't hear you.

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Okay, I had to go with the old school headphones.

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I can hear you.

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To go first.

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Yeah, I didn't, I didn't get to my videos.

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Isaiah had the computer most of the weekend.

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Hmm.

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Um,

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yeah.

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I feel like Ashley.

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I feel like Ashley just told me the same thing over and over but I have the same issue

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about

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I'll, I'll press into God and then I'll get uncomfortable and then I'll just stay back for a while and then I'll go back into go back to it but I really, you know, want it to be, you know, lifestyle change and not just, I'm having a crisis.

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I did have this dream and it was interesting, you know, I wasn't sleeping this weekend.

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And, and by the morning time, I was just exhausted. And so I decided to go back to bed.

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And then I felt like I was leaning into him.

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And

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And then I was watching, then I was, I felt like I left my body and I was watching myself

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this time.

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Because before I was like keeping my eyes closed and not looking, um, but I wasn't home.

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Like last time I was home anyways, but toward the end of it, it was, toward the end of it,

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I got scared.

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I was looking in the mirror and I didn't, they look like Thai women.

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And I'm like, who are these women?

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And I just automatically thought they were my, my aunts like that I've never met, but

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then I started getting afraid.

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So then I, then I woke up, but I feel like it's a part of me that I'm like the Lord's

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revealing about, um, me avoiding parts of myself or just automatically thinking negatively

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about things.

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And, um, every time I come out of like a, uh, like a unhappy experience in my dream

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or, you know, thoughts, well, mostly dreams, I'm like, I had an opportunity to trust the

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Lord here when it's, you know, so I don't know, it was, it was good.

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And then it didn't, then it didn't end up good.

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So what was the, the good part was that you had the dream?

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Is that what you're saying?

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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I felt like I was experiencing.

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Oh yeah.

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So, okay.

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Now I should write it down.

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But now that I remember, I was like, why was it good?

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Um, so when I fell into him, I started flying, but I was only flying in my room.

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So I was like, oh, I'm staying safe, you know?

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And then, um, and then there was this little child and somebody else was caring for her

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and I wasn't, and I was just like, oh, how adorable.

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And I was like, Lord, I don't want a child, but this thing's adorable.

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So if you're going to give this thing to me, sure.

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So, um, yeah, it was just kind of spotty after that, but, and then I, you know, I don't know

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why I ended up looking in the mirror and it was my bathroom mirror and I just saw, um,

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other people in it.

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The other people were your aunts?

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Yes.

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Um, I'm guessing that's who they were, cause that's what I felt like.

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That's who they were.

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Yeah.

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So, yeah, other than that, just trying to enjoy life, even though it's boring right

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now.

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Yeah.

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So how about you, how's your week been?

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Well, I had a question first, friend, um, you said something about how you, you said

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you'll feel like you get close to God and then you say, you, you, did you say you get,

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you said, you said afraid or confused or something?

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What did you say?

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Um, I don't know if I get comfortable or get, um,

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Oh yeah.

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You said uncomfortable.

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Yeah.

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No.

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And then I get uncomfortable, like about returning, if that makes sense.

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So, um, I'm like, oh, it didn't work.

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And then I'll just kind of get discouraged and stop for a while.

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So the uncomfortable is from your feeling like you try to meet him there, but it doesn't

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meet your expectations or what you think.

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Yes.

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Yeah.

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And then I guess I'm not experiencing anything or, um, I have feelings that I don't process

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and I start going into my old habits.

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Like when I know I'm like watching TV a lot or when I know I'm like, um, you know, going

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through my phone or, you know, doing other things, just busy, staying busy instead of

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just going and processing, um, my feelings when things come up, I'm like, oh, I kind

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of like, okay.

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So somebody at work did something, I mean, this is just one example, uh, and I'm like,

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and I felt threatened and I was upset.

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I'm like, you could have just addressed me and not my boss, like if it's something I

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can learn from.

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But then the, just the way they came at me in the meeting was just like, well, kind of

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like, why did you do this?

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instead of, I don't know, I just felt like, okay, I made a mistake, but the way they explained

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to me wasn't, wasn't like a teachable moment. It was more like condemning, like, yeah. And

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I try to just brush it off and it just keeps popping back in my mind or wakes me up. So

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I definitely haven't processed it, or I did try to process it. Finally, I think when I

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started to have that experience, that dream. Oh, hey, Dana. Yeah. So I think, yeah, actually,

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maybe that's what did happen when I was like, finally, like trying to go through the and

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process it with him. Because I was like, well, this thing's keep keeping me up. So I finally

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did that. And I did have an experience. So that was good. Now that I think about it,

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like, yeah, I need a journal more. What's happening? Keep track of it. You know, I think

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my old way of saying things are like, oh, it's either not their attention, or I shouldn't

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care that much that they try to throw me in the bus, or it felt like they're trying to

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throw me in the bus. Instead of teaching me like, what other steps I could have done to

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like, process. I know, completing the next step in the work. It really wasn't mine to

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do. But yeah, just to learn something. But it doesn't feel good still.

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Yeah.

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I understand.

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I think that's a good question. We can ask Ashley, though, about the whole work stuff,

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you know? Yeah, that's a good idea.

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That's a question I have to because I'm like, okay, well, I don't really deal with the,

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like, I, I've cordoned myself off from drama, except for myself. I don't have people drama

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because I'm like, so, but you know, when I step back into that, then yeah, I feel you.

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That's good. Well, thank you for sharing, Rita.

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Being vulnerable. Hi, Diana.

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How's it going?

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Good. How are you?

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Good. How are y'all doing? Can y'all hear me?

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Mm hmm. Yes.

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I have my work headphones. I use these for work.

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Your hair is dark, so it kind of blends. You can't even really tell.

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Voluminous hair right here.

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Would you like to go next, Diana? We're just sharing our journey, our journey shares.

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Oh gosh, it's been this hard. It's been hard for me. I don't know about you guys, but maybe Rita's

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a pro, but I, I'm, I'm, I struggle with the, just with the doing like I'm a natural born hustler,

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you know, like I just like to do, you know, and I just need to learn how to be still.

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Yeah. So I've just been struggling in that part just to be still and to know what is the soul

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and what is of the spirit? Like, when is it me? When is it God? Like, am I, you know, learning that part?

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Yeah, that's a good question. We can get more questions for Ashley when she gets back.

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Yeah. Yeah. Cause she said, she said, when you go into rest that you wanted to be, to get to the

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place where you're doing things out of the spirit versus the soul. And I'm thinking, you know, what

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makes you get to that place where you're now just, it's coming out of the spirit and not the soul.

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Like, I like I've done the tools and all of that. I just don't know if, I'm not sure. I'm sure it's

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like a daily, I'm thinking it's a daily thing that you have to walk out with God.

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And yeah. Maybe, you know, Rita, you're the pro. You're the, you're the, you're the

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the senior person here.

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I think what Ashley said was that you kind of choose that it

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is God. And then he'll teach you as you know, or he may correct

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you and guide you but he loves that you sought him and we're

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choosing him.

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That's good.

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That's a thumbs up.

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I knew she would know.

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That's a good question. Diana. I, I needed to hear that. That

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question and answer.

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How about you tell me?

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Oh, well, I had a follow up question. So like, specifically,

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like, what could you speak to if you feel comfortable? Like,

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what are the things that you're referring to is kind of like, I

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guess, making decisions or feeling like, Oh, am I operating

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out of my soul? Like in what area? Or what? What's the thing,

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you know,

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just like the daily thing of just, you know, well, you know,

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good example is, I'll just put something out there, you know,

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my son just turned 18. And so I've just been, you know, just

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asking God to give me peace. And, you know, to help me lay it

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down to where, now that he's 18. And he's telling me, Mom, you

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know, like, I want to do this, I want to do that, I want to do

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that. And now all of a sudden, I'm having to step back a little

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bit. And, you know, not be so, you know, nobody tells you that

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part when your kids turn 18, that all of a sudden, I remember

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being there, when you just you now you want to do your own

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thing, right. But just just just as an example, you know,

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saying God, when do I have to step back? And when do I have to

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step in? When is it me trying to be controlling mom? And when is

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it like, just in that it just in that kind of thing, I'm just

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saying, you know, I want to make sure that what I do is just, you

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know, and coming out of, you know, it's just not me that, you

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know, but I I've been praying and, and I know, God has given

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me strength to kind of let go and step back a little bit. And

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I know it's him, because I only have one son, only one child. So

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it's like, he's, he's given me the strength, and he's helped me

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and he's kind of said, you know, you've, you've got to, you know,

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you're gonna have to let go, you know. So, but just as an

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example, I'm just saying in that way, you know, I know,

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prayer helps, right? Because prayer, you know, we go to God

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with whatever we have. And of course, that helps.

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Yeah. Well, I just want to say, I'm sorry, I know that can be

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really emotional. It's your baby.

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Oh, my gosh, it is. And it's given me flashbacks of when I

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was that age. And I was like, Oh, my God. But yeah, so do you

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have any kids? No, you want to? You want to know that now? I'm

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not capable anymore. I had a surgery in April, but I'm fine

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with it. Because I'm like, my story's different. And I was an

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educator for like 20 years. So I feel like I've raised quite a

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few. So I had my skin did what kind of surgery did you have?

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fibroids removed. And so as a result, I had to get a

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hysterectomy. Yeah, a partial or whole?

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They left ovary.

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Okay, exactly like me. Oh, yeah, I had a hysterectomy. I have one

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ovary as well. So that's why I only have one because I had also

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fibro tumors, fibro tumors, I had endometriosis. And I even

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had, I even had the tumors in like on my liver. They had to

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while they had to remove like, I mean, just so I've had them, I

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had them everywhere. And I had to fibroid surgeries. I didn't I

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didn't know if I was even going to have Samuel because they had

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told me that. I don't know, you know, because you have all of

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this going on. And my doctor said, you know, I don't know if

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you're going to be able to and well, he's a miracle of God. But

218
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but no, I totally get you. And that is so painful, though. Don't

219
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you feel much better now having had had the surgery? Girl? I

220
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literally my stomach it was like I had I was having a child went

221
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in the hay ain't got nobody's name to show for it got a scar

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for it. But it was I was so glad to have that out.

223
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It was just like, oh, I can't even.

224
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Yeah, I just feel like sometimes it's kind of like,

225
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you feel like, I don't know, this is right,

226
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but it was just like stress

227
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and all of this stuff carrying it.

228
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You know what I mean?

229
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Like, I just feel like sometimes

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it manifests in your body, you know?

231
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Yes.

232
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But even to my sister and my mother,

233
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it had run in the family.

234
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And so it's all good.

235
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I'm just happy that I wasn't like heartbroken.

236
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Like, I can't have kids.

237
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I'm happy that I just had come to a place a long time ago.

238
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Like, I got married in my 40s.

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So I just kind of already was kind of like, you know.

240
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Made peace with it.

241
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I made peace with it.

242
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Like, well, I'm not having a baby.

243
00:20:40.920 --> 00:20:41.920
And you know what?

244
00:20:41.920 --> 00:20:44.880
I'm not, I am not, you know, I am not,

245
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I'm just talking about my journey.

246
00:20:46.360 --> 00:20:48.160
You know, I love my son, but you know what?

247
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It is hard.

248
00:20:49.360 --> 00:20:51.880
I mean, it is hard having to, I only have one,

249
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but I don't have people to do with all the children.

250
00:20:54.160 --> 00:20:55.000
Me either.

251
00:20:55.000 --> 00:20:56.120
Oh Lord.

252
00:20:56.120 --> 00:20:58.240
Mamas are the best people in the world.

253
00:20:58.240 --> 00:21:00.760
I'll just be like, girl, that's your full-time job.

254
00:21:00.760 --> 00:21:01.960
Then you got another job.

255
00:21:01.960 --> 00:21:03.600
Like, mamas are everything.

256
00:21:03.600 --> 00:21:05.080
You sacrificed your body.

257
00:21:05.080 --> 00:21:05.920
Sorry.

258
00:21:05.920 --> 00:21:07.000
Anyway, but girl, yeah, I feel you.

259
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So, you know, I don't have any babies.

260
00:21:08.640 --> 00:21:13.640
I get to spoil my niece and nephew though.

261
00:21:14.120 --> 00:21:15.320
Yeah, that's good.

262
00:21:15.320 --> 00:21:16.160
That's good.

263
00:21:16.160 --> 00:21:17.360
You know, but, oh yeah.

264
00:21:17.360 --> 00:21:18.240
I remember I had the surgery.

265
00:21:18.240 --> 00:21:20.000
I was like, woo, thank you, Jesus.

266
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Thank you, Jesus.

267
00:21:20.840 --> 00:21:22.000
When did I do this before?

268
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I was like, woo.

269
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Yeah.

270
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Yeah.

271
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So, okay.

272
00:21:30.200 --> 00:21:32.400
For me, I guess I can share,

273
00:21:32.400 --> 00:21:33.840
cause I was supposed to do, like, I was like,

274
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oh, I'm going to do a journey share,

275
00:21:35.600 --> 00:21:36.840
like post it or whatever,

276
00:21:36.840 --> 00:21:39.280
but I haven't gotten around to that.

277
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So I guess I'll share a praise report here

278
00:21:42.040 --> 00:21:44.040
and maybe something I'm struggling with.

279
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Let's see.

280
00:21:47.440 --> 00:21:48.280
Oh yeah.

281
00:21:48.280 --> 00:21:51.360
So I know, I listened to one of,

282
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I think it was Annette's journey share

283
00:21:54.720 --> 00:21:58.960
about how she wasn't necessarily in the job

284
00:21:58.960 --> 00:21:59.880
that she wanted to be.

285
00:21:59.880 --> 00:22:01.520
She's just like, I love how she phrased it.

286
00:22:01.520 --> 00:22:03.600
She had this inner deep knowing

287
00:22:03.600 --> 00:22:05.200
that there was more for her.

288
00:22:05.200 --> 00:22:09.320
And, but you know, like,

289
00:22:09.320 --> 00:22:13.240
and that really, really resonated with me.

290
00:22:13.240 --> 00:22:15.320
And I thought back about, like,

291
00:22:15.320 --> 00:22:18.160
the accusations that I had against God.

292
00:22:18.160 --> 00:22:20.000
And it was really like, I was,

293
00:22:21.520 --> 00:22:22.880
and I thought I didn't have any.

294
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:27.240
I remember I told, it was Karen.

295
00:22:27.240 --> 00:22:28.080
I was like, well,

296
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I don't think I have any accusations against God,

297
00:22:29.560 --> 00:22:31.160
but it turns out I did.

298
00:22:31.160 --> 00:22:32.760
So it was just like a word of knowledge

299
00:22:32.760 --> 00:22:35.440
that I had before that I just really was,

300
00:22:35.440 --> 00:22:37.880
you know, holding fast to.

301
00:22:37.880 --> 00:22:39.440
I have a friend,

302
00:22:39.440 --> 00:22:41.680
she gets to live an amazing lifestyle

303
00:22:41.680 --> 00:22:43.120
with her and her husband.

304
00:22:43.120 --> 00:22:44.640
And I'm like, I've always been like,

305
00:22:44.640 --> 00:22:46.600
if God can do it for them, they can do it for me.

306
00:22:46.600 --> 00:22:48.120
He's not a respecter of persons.

307
00:22:48.120 --> 00:22:49.440
You know what I mean?

308
00:22:49.440 --> 00:22:52.440
But I just really had stepped out on faith

309
00:22:52.920 --> 00:22:55.840
thinking like, okay, well, this is the, you know, like,

310
00:22:55.840 --> 00:22:57.920
okay, I paid all my debt off.

311
00:22:57.920 --> 00:23:01.040
You know, I come from surgery in April

312
00:23:01.040 --> 00:23:03.120
and I had enough time.

313
00:23:03.120 --> 00:23:07.200
I took off to the end of my, you know,

314
00:23:07.200 --> 00:23:09.320
for the rest of the school year, essentially.

315
00:23:09.320 --> 00:23:12.000
And then I just was like, God, well, how do I,

316
00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:13.360
how do I not go back?

317
00:23:13.360 --> 00:23:16.160
Like, how do I have this like peaceful life

318
00:23:16.160 --> 00:23:17.480
where I'm not stressed out?

319
00:23:17.480 --> 00:23:18.320
You know what I mean?

320
00:23:18.320 --> 00:23:19.360
Like constantly.

321
00:23:20.040 --> 00:23:25.160
And I felt like he said, well, you can sell your house to him.

322
00:23:25.160 --> 00:23:28.440
And so I was like, okay, nothing but a word.

323
00:23:28.440 --> 00:23:30.280
Like, I mean, I just got to the point

324
00:23:30.280 --> 00:23:33.320
where I just was like, I mean, it's just things, it's stuff.

325
00:23:33.320 --> 00:23:35.160
And then it gets to a point where it owns you,

326
00:23:35.160 --> 00:23:36.160
you don't even own it.

327
00:23:36.160 --> 00:23:37.280
You know what I'm saying?

328
00:23:37.280 --> 00:23:39.560
So I'm just like, I just had been like,

329
00:23:39.560 --> 00:23:40.840
release, hey, that's fine.

330
00:23:40.840 --> 00:23:42.880
Like, I have all, I have this stuff,

331
00:23:42.880 --> 00:23:44.960
but like, I don't have the life I want to live.

332
00:23:44.960 --> 00:23:46.280
I'm working 24 seven.

333
00:23:46.280 --> 00:23:49.400
And so anyway, back to my accusation against God,

334
00:23:49.400 --> 00:23:50.440
I just was like, well, God,

335
00:23:50.440 --> 00:23:52.560
I just stepped out on faith and did this.

336
00:23:52.560 --> 00:23:55.120
And like a lot of the things that were going

337
00:23:55.120 --> 00:23:57.560
through my mind was, it was a lot of self-doubt.

338
00:23:57.560 --> 00:24:01.520
Like afterwards, like eight, 10 months in, you know,

339
00:24:02.360 --> 00:24:04.600
I thought that like, well, I had a word of knowledge

340
00:24:04.600 --> 00:24:06.800
just about like, I was going to be able to have

341
00:24:06.800 --> 00:24:10.000
multiple businesses, that money would never be a concern.

342
00:24:10.960 --> 00:24:13.240
And so I was like, okay, well, I stepped out on faith

343
00:24:13.240 --> 00:24:15.400
and money isn't a concern and okay.

344
00:24:15.440 --> 00:24:18.320
But I just was like, so just used to like doing,

345
00:24:18.320 --> 00:24:19.320
well, I got to bring an income.

346
00:24:19.320 --> 00:24:20.480
I got to bring an income.

347
00:24:20.480 --> 00:24:23.960
But I was like, I just was like, you know what?

348
00:24:23.960 --> 00:24:26.080
I expected it to work a certain way.

349
00:24:26.080 --> 00:24:28.120
And I was trying to force fit things

350
00:24:28.120 --> 00:24:29.920
that I didn't even ask God about.

351
00:24:29.920 --> 00:24:31.720
And I just realized that, you know what?

352
00:24:31.720 --> 00:24:34.720
Like I do, I still believe his word is going to come true.

353
00:24:34.720 --> 00:24:37.040
Like I know his word doesn't come back void.

354
00:24:37.040 --> 00:24:38.640
So I stand with that.

355
00:24:38.640 --> 00:24:41.320
But I realized that I was trying to put God in a box

356
00:24:41.320 --> 00:24:44.880
and trying to say, well, it needed to come this way.

357
00:24:45.400 --> 00:24:46.840
And then I was stressing myself out

358
00:24:46.840 --> 00:24:50.960
and had like major anxiety and just like, you know,

359
00:24:50.960 --> 00:24:53.000
it's just the whole cycles of doing too much

360
00:24:53.000 --> 00:24:55.160
and then not doing anything because you're depressed

361
00:24:55.160 --> 00:24:56.960
because doing too much like wore you out.

362
00:24:56.960 --> 00:24:58.360
And it was just all of this.

363
00:24:58.360 --> 00:25:00.120
And then just the self-doubt.

364
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:02.280
Oh, did I make the right decision?

365
00:25:02.280 --> 00:25:04.480
And then when I, I guess a week,

366
00:25:04.480 --> 00:25:06.660
oh, it's been about a week or two ago,

367
00:25:06.660 --> 00:25:08.800
when I went to my friend's house and had the dream

368
00:25:08.800 --> 00:25:11.640
and all that stuff, like, it just, I just really,

369
00:25:11.640 --> 00:25:13.840
and I just started journaling, like journaling,

370
00:25:13.840 --> 00:25:18.560
like dying, like you and, wait, Karen.

371
00:25:18.560 --> 00:25:22.160
Karen said, just like my raw emotions,

372
00:25:22.160 --> 00:25:24.580
just like, why'd you even put me here?

373
00:25:24.580 --> 00:25:26.000
Like, this life is stupid.

374
00:25:26.000 --> 00:25:27.520
Like, did I make mistakes?

375
00:25:27.520 --> 00:25:28.800
Like, it was just like raw,

376
00:25:28.800 --> 00:25:30.560
cause like, I was in a deep depression.

377
00:25:30.560 --> 00:25:31.600
I really was.

378
00:25:31.600 --> 00:25:33.120
And like, my friend had prayed me out,

379
00:25:33.120 --> 00:25:36.220
but I knew that I couldn't keep going back there.

380
00:25:36.220 --> 00:25:38.320
I needed to do something different

381
00:25:38.320 --> 00:25:40.660
and just putting it all out there.

382
00:25:40.660 --> 00:25:42.860
Like, did I make the wrong decision?

383
00:25:44.380 --> 00:25:47.960
Like you said, X, Y, Z, but like, it didn't happen that way.

384
00:25:47.960 --> 00:25:50.100
And I just, God has just been so faithful.

385
00:25:50.100 --> 00:25:51.360
Like, I'll just pray that.

386
00:25:51.360 --> 00:25:54.360
And I'll just see him, he'll just take it away.

387
00:25:54.360 --> 00:25:58.600
Like, like all of those emotions that I felt,

388
00:25:59.360 --> 00:26:01.040
I just feel like they just start, like they evaporate.

389
00:26:01.040 --> 00:26:03.040
Like, I literally gave it to him

390
00:26:03.040 --> 00:26:04.800
and left it at the cross, so to speak.

391
00:26:04.800 --> 00:26:05.800
I gave it to him.

392
00:26:05.800 --> 00:26:08.560
And it's like, now they don't weigh me down.

393
00:26:08.560 --> 00:26:11.560
Like, I'm just like, I'm like, I'm free flowing.

394
00:26:11.560 --> 00:26:13.720
I'm yours, Lord, you've already provided.

395
00:26:13.720 --> 00:26:16.280
Now, why am I worrying about tomorrow?

396
00:26:16.280 --> 00:26:17.120
You know what I mean?

397
00:26:17.120 --> 00:26:20.160
Like, you dress the flowers in the field.

398
00:26:20.160 --> 00:26:22.120
You know, like, why do I need to worry?

399
00:26:22.120 --> 00:26:25.800
You know, you are El Shaddai, the God of more than enough.

400
00:26:25.800 --> 00:26:28.860
And so I know he's going to,

401
00:26:29.760 --> 00:26:32.020
I know there are steps that, yeah, I need to take,

402
00:26:32.020 --> 00:26:32.860
but I'm just like,

403
00:26:32.860 --> 00:26:35.820
I'm not gonna stress myself out about tomorrow.

404
00:26:35.820 --> 00:26:40.440
And I feel like I'm wise in what the resources that I have.

405
00:26:41.520 --> 00:26:43.240
And I'm not gonna stress myself out.

406
00:26:43.240 --> 00:26:45.720
Like, I know he'll show me the next step.

407
00:26:45.720 --> 00:26:49.400
And it's really been great because all of the curiosities

408
00:26:49.400 --> 00:26:53.600
and like, just talents or things that I wanted to explore,

409
00:26:53.600 --> 00:26:54.880
that I felt like, well,

410
00:26:54.880 --> 00:26:56.120
I didn't even know I wanted to explore

411
00:26:56.120 --> 00:26:58.600
because I was just so consumed with work all the time

412
00:26:58.600 --> 00:27:01.680
that that's all I thought about was work, you know,

413
00:27:01.680 --> 00:27:02.840
and the next thing.

414
00:27:03.920 --> 00:27:06.240
So like, he's just kind of opening up paths

415
00:27:06.240 --> 00:27:09.520
and just reminding me of things that I have interest in

416
00:27:09.520 --> 00:27:13.560
and love and giving me ideas and things like that.

417
00:27:13.560 --> 00:27:18.280
So that has been a major blessing.

418
00:27:18.280 --> 00:27:20.680
I guess I want to just share just kind of like

419
00:27:20.680 --> 00:27:23.640
the specifics about an accusation against God

420
00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:25.520
and how he kind of just really like

421
00:27:26.720 --> 00:27:30.360
has been stepping in with me and on my behalf,

422
00:27:30.360 --> 00:27:32.760
just to kind of give me peace and just be at rest.

423
00:27:32.760 --> 00:27:37.760
And so it's just been a really wonderful walk

424
00:27:38.960 --> 00:27:42.880
since I decided to start giving every little tidbit to him

425
00:27:43.760 --> 00:27:48.440
from when am I going to Mardi Gras with my husband?

426
00:27:48.440 --> 00:27:49.560
What am I gonna wear?

427
00:27:49.560 --> 00:27:51.320
Oh my God, I need some outfits

428
00:27:51.320 --> 00:27:53.680
to like drama and stress about that.

429
00:27:53.680 --> 00:27:57.160
And like obsessing in my sleep to like,

430
00:27:57.160 --> 00:27:59.800
Lord, Lord, help me pack this bag, like get it together.

431
00:27:59.800 --> 00:28:02.080
Now I'm like, oh, my outfits are fire.

432
00:28:02.080 --> 00:28:03.800
Okay, so it's like from big things

433
00:28:03.800 --> 00:28:05.920
to little, little things, you know what I mean?

434
00:28:05.920 --> 00:28:08.720
So they really don't matter in the long run.

435
00:28:10.000 --> 00:28:14.320
But he's faithful, he knows the hairs I have,

436
00:28:14.320 --> 00:28:15.760
how many hairs I have on my head.

437
00:28:15.760 --> 00:28:19.000
So he's just as concerned about me thinking that I'm cute

438
00:28:19.000 --> 00:28:20.400
when I walk out the door.

439
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:23.160
So that's just one thing.

440
00:28:23.160 --> 00:28:27.560
I'll share my other stuff in my video journey share, so.

441
00:28:29.520 --> 00:28:31.960
Oh, it has been a real breakthrough for me.

442
00:28:32.960 --> 00:28:37.240
Where, by the way, I love your, just your testimony

443
00:28:37.240 --> 00:28:39.600
and what God is doing in you.

444
00:28:40.480 --> 00:28:43.880
I saw your journey share where you spoke about the,

445
00:28:45.280 --> 00:28:48.600
about your dream and how you felt.

446
00:28:48.600 --> 00:28:53.600
And I mean, it's just amazing just how the dreams can just,

447
00:28:54.240 --> 00:28:55.320
I mean, how God speaks to you.

448
00:28:55.320 --> 00:28:57.360
I don't know about you, but I dream too.

449
00:28:57.360 --> 00:29:02.080
And it's just amazing how he can literally show you

450
00:29:02.080 --> 00:29:03.800
what you're going through

451
00:29:03.800 --> 00:29:06.320
or what you're going to go through either way.

452
00:29:06.320 --> 00:29:09.360
But it's just like, it's just awesome.

453
00:29:09.360 --> 00:29:13.000
And I could, I mean, I could just see that in you.

454
00:29:13.000 --> 00:29:15.400
And even when you were doing your journey share

455
00:29:15.400 --> 00:29:18.400
and speaking about the dream, I mean, I was just like, wow.

456
00:29:19.200 --> 00:29:21.480
And she's, you could see the, you know,

457
00:29:21.480 --> 00:29:24.680
that breakthrough in you and that, and what God is doing.

458
00:29:24.680 --> 00:29:25.920
So that's awesome.

459
00:29:25.920 --> 00:29:26.760
That's awesome.

460
00:29:26.760 --> 00:29:27.600
Thank you.

461
00:29:27.600 --> 00:29:31.720
And you know, the, I was going to say that

462
00:29:31.720 --> 00:29:33.680
what Ashley had said, when I saw her,

463
00:29:33.680 --> 00:29:35.160
one of the videos she put on there,

464
00:29:35.160 --> 00:29:39.760
it was so freeing that she said just like,

465
00:29:39.760 --> 00:29:41.960
it's okay to be where you're at.

466
00:29:41.960 --> 00:29:44.240
Cause you know that, especially social media

467
00:29:44.240 --> 00:29:46.960
and everybody tells you, no, you gotta be here

468
00:29:46.960 --> 00:29:48.080
or you gotta be there.

469
00:29:48.080 --> 00:29:50.000
Or you just feel like you're behind

470
00:29:50.000 --> 00:29:51.480
or you're not where you need to be

471
00:29:51.480 --> 00:29:54.400
or you're not as successful as you're supposed to be

472
00:29:54.400 --> 00:29:57.200
or your goals or you have, you know,

473
00:29:57.200 --> 00:29:59.080
that's okay to be where you're at.

474
00:29:59.080 --> 00:30:00.280
Like I, that was just.

475
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.000
Oh, thank you, Lord.

476
00:30:02.000 --> 00:30:07.280
And that is just so it was just like, OK, I don't if I'm five,

477
00:30:07.280 --> 00:30:08.040
I'm going to be five.

478
00:30:08.040 --> 00:30:10.320
I think she said that if you're five, you're going to be five.

479
00:30:10.320 --> 00:30:13.120
If you're 10, be 10, whatever it is, just be that.

480
00:30:13.400 --> 00:30:15.560
And because you might miss something

481
00:30:16.160 --> 00:30:19.240
that God's trying to show you because you want to get ahead.

482
00:30:20.360 --> 00:30:23.600
And that has been me all my life, I feel like I've always

483
00:30:23.600 --> 00:30:26.880
just wanted to get ahead and not be where I'm at.

484
00:30:27.240 --> 00:30:29.480
I remember being young and wanting to be older.

485
00:30:29.960 --> 00:30:33.840
And no matter what, I was always wanting to be older, you know.

486
00:30:34.160 --> 00:30:38.360
And it's just like, no, no, I need to be where I'm at, you know.

487
00:30:38.360 --> 00:30:43.480
And I ask God, show me how to be, how to be OK where I'm at,

488
00:30:44.240 --> 00:30:48.640
you know, help me to be where I'm at and learn what I need to learn

489
00:30:48.800 --> 00:30:51.960
because I don't want to go around the mountain, go around,

490
00:30:51.960 --> 00:30:53.400
you know, and keep going.

491
00:30:53.400 --> 00:30:58.520
So it's it's just that I love that when she said that in the video,

492
00:30:58.520 --> 00:30:59.920
I was just like, wow.

493
00:30:59.920 --> 00:31:03.800
And I remind myself every day, it's OK to be where I'm at.

494
00:31:04.240 --> 00:31:06.400
You know, of course, I'm going to stay here, but.

495
00:31:07.560 --> 00:31:09.440
And there's a reason why.

496
00:31:10.480 --> 00:31:13.720
So, yeah, yeah, I so agree, because we don't get to

497
00:31:13.920 --> 00:31:17.120
look, we don't enjoy life so much because we're so worried

498
00:31:17.120 --> 00:31:19.640
about the next thing, you know, like it's just like,

499
00:31:20.200 --> 00:31:23.960
but like take a moment and just be, you know, it's not even like,

500
00:31:24.120 --> 00:31:26.840
oh, be grateful, it's just like

501
00:31:26.840 --> 00:31:29.240
just be here because that's where they I feel that's where

502
00:31:29.240 --> 00:31:30.320
the anxiety comes from.

503
00:31:30.320 --> 00:31:32.040
OK, where's the next move? What is it?

504
00:31:32.040 --> 00:31:36.040
You know, and it's just like, oh, my God, is nonstop, you know.

505
00:31:36.040 --> 00:31:40.920
So just learning how to be in the moment and just like it's OK.

506
00:31:41.240 --> 00:31:42.000
Just going to enjoy.

507
00:31:42.000 --> 00:31:45.800
And there's always something there's always going to be something that that,

508
00:31:46.280 --> 00:31:50.520
you know, wherever, whether it be in your midst, in your job,

509
00:31:50.720 --> 00:31:54.200
whether it be in your personal life, there will always be somebody

510
00:31:54.200 --> 00:31:57.000
or something telling you you need to be somewhere else.

511
00:31:57.640 --> 00:32:02.040
And so it's just a good, you know, to me, that's rest.

512
00:32:02.760 --> 00:32:05.520
Rest is being free from other people's opinion.

513
00:32:05.960 --> 00:32:08.760
I've I've needed that rest for a long time.

514
00:32:09.000 --> 00:32:11.680
So I've just been telling myself, you know.

515
00:32:13.160 --> 00:32:15.400
Yeah. And expectations.

516
00:32:15.400 --> 00:32:17.160
I was like a Mardi Gras today.

517
00:32:17.160 --> 00:32:20.600
And it was this gentleman, I think he was an attorney,

518
00:32:20.600 --> 00:32:23.960
does commercial real estate or whatever or something like that, whatever.

519
00:32:24.200 --> 00:32:26.040
And then he was talking to my husband, who's an attorney.

520
00:32:26.040 --> 00:32:27.760
And he was like, oh, and he talked to me.

521
00:32:27.760 --> 00:32:29.360
He was just like, oh, are you an attorney?

522
00:32:29.360 --> 00:32:30.680
So I was like, no.

523
00:32:30.680 --> 00:32:35.240
You know, before I would I would have been like, oh, no, I'm an educator.

524
00:32:35.760 --> 00:32:37.240
I went to school.

525
00:32:37.240 --> 00:32:39.200
No, I don't care, girl.

526
00:32:39.200 --> 00:32:40.920
I've got you, child. That's my identity.

527
00:32:40.920 --> 00:32:42.480
And nothing else matters.

528
00:32:42.480 --> 00:32:44.800
It don't matter. It don't matter if I own a home.

529
00:32:44.800 --> 00:32:46.960
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I don't care.

530
00:32:46.960 --> 00:32:48.480
I'm Tammy and I'm loved by God.

531
00:32:48.480 --> 00:32:51.160
That's all you need to know, because that's really all it comes down to.

532
00:32:54.600 --> 00:32:57.720
But anyway, I feel you.

533
00:33:07.000 --> 00:33:09.520
I'm like, it's 832.

534
00:33:09.520 --> 00:33:12.720
Yeah. Well.

535
00:33:15.080 --> 00:33:18.840
Oh, my word, it's 832.

536
00:33:18.840 --> 00:33:22.440
I feel like I could keep talking, but that's not what we're here for.

537
00:33:24.320 --> 00:33:26.120
No, you it is.

538
00:33:26.120 --> 00:33:27.160
That is great.

539
00:33:27.160 --> 00:33:30.600
If you have something else before I jump in, go for it.

540
00:33:31.560 --> 00:33:33.240
Did you have anything?

541
00:33:33.240 --> 00:33:35.360
Does anyone have anything?

542
00:33:37.360 --> 00:33:39.120
No, everyone good.

543
00:33:39.120 --> 00:33:40.640
I love hearing everybody's

544
00:33:40.800 --> 00:33:45.880
everybody's discussion and just where everybody is.

545
00:33:45.920 --> 00:33:47.040
I love it.

546
00:33:47.040 --> 00:33:52.200
So I also heard some questions, but I didn't really try to remember them.

547
00:33:53.200 --> 00:33:57.120
It's like, OK, I need to be paying attention to the rest of the conversation

548
00:33:57.120 --> 00:34:00.960
and I can't having my mind and being trying to remember other things

549
00:34:00.960 --> 00:34:02.040
and that I'm not paying attention.

550
00:34:02.040 --> 00:34:06.680
So did anyone have any questions or anything they wanted to bring up?

551
00:34:06.680 --> 00:34:09.560
Or I don't know.

552
00:34:09.560 --> 00:34:10.360
Or is everyone good?

553
00:34:10.360 --> 00:34:13.159
Did y'all solve it in the meantime?

554
00:34:14.520 --> 00:34:16.840
Shin, I was just wondering,

555
00:34:18.639 --> 00:34:22.239
and I don't even know how to how to phrase it, but but

556
00:34:23.840 --> 00:34:27.080
how do you get to where you're

557
00:34:27.760 --> 00:34:32.280
operating out of your spirit, not your soul, without striving?

558
00:34:32.880 --> 00:34:36.880
Because in my religious minds, X mindset,

559
00:34:36.920 --> 00:34:42.120
I, you know, it was fasting and doing this and doing that and doing that.

560
00:34:42.120 --> 00:34:46.600
And then to because if I wasn't doing those things, I wasn't,

561
00:34:47.040 --> 00:34:49.880
you know, of course, nothing could come out of my spirit

562
00:34:49.880 --> 00:34:52.920
because I had to be had to do all those things.

563
00:34:53.080 --> 00:34:55.480
You're working, which are not bad things, you know, but

564
00:34:56.239 --> 00:35:00.040
but how on my daily I'm trying.

565
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:05.440
operate out of my spirit. Like what, I don't know how to stop

566
00:35:05.440 --> 00:35:09.600
doing everything, but still do that. Like I, I feel like in my

567
00:35:09.720 --> 00:35:12.920
mind, it's something saying, you know, no, you, you've got to do

568
00:35:12.920 --> 00:35:16.800
all things, you know, you've got to. I don't know if I make

569
00:35:16.800 --> 00:35:17.560
sense.

570
00:35:18.280 --> 00:35:26.320
Oh, yeah, no, absolutely. So it's actually, um, it's why I

571
00:35:26.320 --> 00:35:31.360
talk about the importance of, because you want to operate more

572
00:35:31.360 --> 00:35:34.120
out of your, not to sound cliche-ish, but you're wanting

573
00:35:34.120 --> 00:35:38.320
to operate more out of being, because of who it is that you

574
00:35:38.400 --> 00:35:43.920
are, not because, oh, I'm doing this, or I haven't been doing

575
00:35:43.920 --> 00:35:48.280
this. But rather, no, this is who I am, this feels natural.

576
00:35:49.120 --> 00:35:52.600
It's, it's a, I don't know, just a natural expression of who I am

577
00:35:52.600 --> 00:35:55.800
and what I'm kind of like feeling right now, etc. And but

578
00:35:55.800 --> 00:35:58.960
the thing is, we all kind of wonder, yeah, but how do I get

579
00:35:58.960 --> 00:36:01.920
to that place and stop the doing? And then how do I know

580
00:36:01.920 --> 00:36:07.080
it's me and not it's God and not me? And part of the thing is to

581
00:36:07.080 --> 00:36:11.120
know that there's nothing wrong with it being you, what it is

582
00:36:11.120 --> 00:36:16.440
that we want to, but the only way that it is okay, for it to

583
00:36:16.480 --> 00:36:22.240
be you, so to speak, is if it's not out of your flesh that

584
00:36:22.240 --> 00:36:26.960
believes that acting out of fear in separation from God, as

585
00:36:26.960 --> 00:36:32.800
opposed to, it is okay for it to be out of your soul, as long as

586
00:36:32.800 --> 00:36:36.120
you know, it's, you know, which, of course, you call it flesh,

587
00:36:36.120 --> 00:36:39.920
but it's not really your flesh aspect of your soul, it's an

588
00:36:39.920 --> 00:36:42.440
aspect of your soul that's in alignment with your spirit,

589
00:36:42.440 --> 00:36:46.040
that's an agreement with your spirit that's in faith in what

590
00:36:46.040 --> 00:36:49.080
God has said. And then that aspect of you, now that your

591
00:36:49.080 --> 00:36:51.440
soul is aligned in that particular area in that

592
00:36:51.440 --> 00:36:57.480
particular moment, okay, who is, who is you? Who are you?

593
00:36:57.480 --> 00:37:00.840
And I was I was purposefully incorrect in my grammar there.

594
00:37:01.080 --> 00:37:05.520
Who are you? You know, what is your soul? What is your unique,

595
00:37:05.560 --> 00:37:12.320
unique expression, but it can, but it needs to be out of a

596
00:37:12.320 --> 00:37:16.760
place where, like I said, you're, you're in faith with

597
00:37:16.760 --> 00:37:21.680
God, you are, you're operating out of your understanding of

598
00:37:21.680 --> 00:37:24.800
your true identity, that it's from your union with the Lord,

599
00:37:24.800 --> 00:37:26.800
that you're unconditionally love, you're unconditionally

600
00:37:26.800 --> 00:37:30.000
accepted, that you're not, that you're not separated, that

601
00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:33.400
there's nothing to fear, that he's provider, he's protector,

602
00:37:33.720 --> 00:37:39.840
and that, that that is not being threatened and can't be, then

603
00:37:39.840 --> 00:37:47.680
that being that person, that is complete is completely taken

604
00:37:47.680 --> 00:37:55.120
care of and has no worries or cares. What would that person

605
00:37:55.160 --> 00:38:02.040
do? Meaning not what is in theory? No, when you can, what

606
00:38:02.040 --> 00:38:05.640
does that person do? So who are you really? And the only way to

607
00:38:05.640 --> 00:38:09.480
do that, for it to not be theory, is for you to truly

608
00:38:09.480 --> 00:38:12.080
choose that God does love you to the extent that he does, that

609
00:38:12.080 --> 00:38:14.720
you are who he says that you are, and that you're unified

610
00:38:14.720 --> 00:38:16.520
with him, and you're not threatened to be able to be

611
00:38:16.520 --> 00:38:20.560
separated, even by your own sin. Because neither death nor life,

612
00:38:20.560 --> 00:38:22.920
your angels nor principalities, you know, nor heaven or earth,

613
00:38:22.920 --> 00:38:25.600
you know, and all that stuff can separate us from the love of

614
00:38:25.600 --> 00:38:30.840
the Lord. So that's why I talk so much about God's love, about

615
00:38:30.840 --> 00:38:33.960
the fact that we're unified with him, why I've been encouraging

616
00:38:33.960 --> 00:38:37.720
all to focus on delighting in yourself, and choosing yourself,

617
00:38:37.960 --> 00:38:42.080
and whatever is to kind of get back to that place of, of being

618
00:38:42.080 --> 00:38:46.680
without me having to, without me saying it, because we're so used

619
00:38:46.680 --> 00:38:49.680
to hearing, which is why I really don't talk about the

620
00:38:49.680 --> 00:38:53.480
whole doing, being versus doing because it's so cliche-ish,

621
00:38:54.040 --> 00:38:57.320
people just kind of like gloss over it. If I say it, I'm like,

622
00:38:57.480 --> 00:39:00.760
because we even the non, even the non believers talk about

623
00:39:00.800 --> 00:39:04.640
that don't don't do, you know, be. And so we've heard it so

624
00:39:04.640 --> 00:39:08.280
much that it has lost a lot of its impact and meaning. And we

625
00:39:08.280 --> 00:39:12.040
all have a lot of other meanings associated with it. And so but

626
00:39:12.040 --> 00:39:17.040
it is that it is that same idea. It's just focusing on being but

627
00:39:17.360 --> 00:39:21.360
what is that? How do you get to that? How do you get to that

628
00:39:21.360 --> 00:39:25.920
place, where you're, you're connected truly with who it is

629
00:39:25.920 --> 00:39:29.440
that you really are, we become very disconnected, we have a

630
00:39:29.440 --> 00:39:32.480
tendency to believe that we're inherently evil. And we're

631
00:39:32.480 --> 00:39:35.840
constantly trying to either view ourselves as the enemy or to

632
00:39:35.840 --> 00:39:38.320
distance ourselves from ourselves. We don't trust

633
00:39:38.320 --> 00:39:43.560
ourselves. And so we're not really connected with and in

634
00:39:43.560 --> 00:39:47.920
tune with who we really are, what we really feel, and what we

635
00:39:47.920 --> 00:39:52.680
would really do or say, if we felt completely safe, if we felt

636
00:39:52.680 --> 00:39:55.880
that God truly was providing for us truly was taking care of us

637
00:39:55.880 --> 00:40:00.040
and all of that. And so anyway, that's why I recommend

638
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:15.280
And doing the things that I've been talking about, you know, choose to do those exercises where you are receiving the Lord's love where you're at, because that helps connect you experientially with just receiving God's love.

639
00:40:16.120 --> 00:40:22.680
Without you working for it, because God is actually you're actually experiencing that with him.

640
00:40:23.360 --> 00:40:30.320
you're actually experiencing not doing anything and be being overwhelmed undeservedly is how we feel.

641
00:40:30.680 --> 00:40:42.160
You know undeservedly by his love, and so you realize oh my word it's it's that big into that extent, so when we experience it with God when we experience it from the Spirit of God.

642
00:40:42.760 --> 00:40:56.000
It impacts us in a way that nothing and can take away from us, so if you just hear me talking about it, it sounds great in concept, but you're always going to have to remind yourself that it's true.

643
00:40:56.760 --> 00:41:00.960
And you're always going to be trying to just convince yourself, because all it is is knowledge.

644
00:41:01.280 --> 00:41:08.360
it's not an actual experience that you've had with the Lord so that's why I recommend doing that that exercise that love exercise with the Lord.

645
00:41:08.720 --> 00:41:20.880
You know, where you ask Jesus you close your eyes and ask Jesus to come ask him to appear in the room and then just and just sit there and and just experience being loved by him and then it's also why I talk about.

646
00:41:21.600 --> 00:41:36.160
The importance of choosing that we are unified with him to such a degree that your very identity is your union with him it's not just your spirit it's the that's it's the point at which your spirits unified with God spirit.

647
00:41:36.800 --> 00:41:48.480
it's that that that point is is is your action is actually who you are so when you're expressing yourself into life.

648
00:41:48.880 --> 00:41:56.240
which really is going to go into the rest of eternity as well, but we'll just be very simple right now and just talk about you know this this earthly experience.

649
00:41:56.840 --> 00:42:10.600
it's expressing into the physical what you and the Lord's relationship, in other words, your union looks like in the spiritual because it's going to be very unique and it is from for me or for Tammy or reader Karen or.

650
00:42:11.040 --> 00:42:18.840
or Renata or Annette it's going to look very different for all of us, because each of us has just a unique.

651
00:42:19.280 --> 00:42:27.120
is uniquely united with the Lord and therefore has a unique expression so God with each one of us shows that very individually.

652
00:42:28.080 --> 00:42:35.680
So anyway, so who is that what is, who are you, you are that place of it, which you are unified with God.

653
00:42:36.280 --> 00:42:44.960
And you have to release all of the doing and completely just in just be absorbed into shifted into to into.

654
00:42:45.760 --> 00:42:53.640
Choosing that place of union and how do you do that you have to choose that God is safe enough to be unified with.

655
00:42:54.400 --> 00:43:11.400
In order to be safe enough to like in for for you to for in order for it to be safe enough for you to choose that that really is true, because otherwise we keep trying to distance ourselves from it because it's just too hard we don't want to connect with ourselves that much, let alone connect with God.

656
00:43:12.480 --> 00:43:20.520
We definitely don't trust ourselves, let alone the Lord, and so he wants us to overcome that by having faith in the fact that simply he said.

657
00:43:21.000 --> 00:43:29.280
Even though we've got no proof and we don't believe it we don't feel it, but he said, so we have to choose that so that really helps it helps.

658
00:43:29.640 --> 00:43:39.680
That helps you begin to operate more out of your spirit than out of the flesh by doing those things because you're connecting with who you are.

659
00:43:40.360 --> 00:43:45.680
And then you operate from that place so who and I, who are God and I together in the spirit.

660
00:43:46.080 --> 00:43:56.320
That is how we're going to express ourself into the physical world that's how we're going to interact with our son that's how we're going to you know, build a business that's how we're going to.

661
00:43:56.640 --> 00:44:01.040
make decisions in how we handle particular relationship issues.

662
00:44:01.480 --> 00:44:11.760
it's who are God and I together, who is my father because i'm very intimately united with them, so who is my father and therefore who does he show me that I am.

663
00:44:12.080 --> 00:44:21.000
And how does he mature me in expressing that in expressing the love the peace, the joy that you know the everything else that he says that he is.

664
00:44:21.280 --> 00:44:32.960
The protector and the provider, we are that for our kingdom as well, we are that for our for the creation that we're given dominion over just like our father is over his kingdom, which is us.

665
00:44:33.320 --> 00:44:43.200
Right so anyway, so we learn more about who he is and then we think and then and then he reveals to us who it is that who it is that he is and then who it is that we are.

666
00:44:43.880 --> 00:44:53.320
And then what does that person who is that loving that he's been revealing to us that we are that that at peace that has that much joy that is that much patience.

667
00:44:53.720 --> 00:45:00.080
What did what kind of decisions does that person make not in theory i'm saying you have to connect.

668
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:06.880
with who you really are, and then just, and then it'll naturally flow out. You'll, that's why in

669
00:45:06.880 --> 00:45:11.920
rest, you can hear the Lord more clearly, you know, because there's just nothing getting in

670
00:45:11.920 --> 00:45:18.320
the way of you trying to figure anything out. You're so, you're, you're operating more out of

671
00:45:18.320 --> 00:45:23.120
just your existence, your naturalness, the being, because remember you're the balloon.

672
00:45:24.000 --> 00:45:28.720
So it's very natural to be the balloon. It's very natural to just be who you are. So you have to

673
00:45:28.720 --> 00:45:35.440
connect to that, which is choosing that you're unconditionally loved, accepted, and that,

674
00:45:35.440 --> 00:45:40.480
you know, you're unified with him and can't be threatened to be separated. And then, and the way

675
00:45:40.480 --> 00:45:44.800
that you do that, which is why I've been talking about the whole, you know, be enough for yourself.

676
00:45:44.800 --> 00:45:50.080
One of the ways that you can, can start to get over the hurdles that we find of connecting with

677
00:45:50.080 --> 00:45:56.800
that love and that union is choose that you're enjoyable. Start delighting in yourself. And then

678
00:45:56.800 --> 00:46:01.600
sometimes any gaps that there are between us being able to believe God that he loves us

679
00:46:01.600 --> 00:46:05.840
unconditionally, accepts us unconditionally that we're unified with him, that he's safe.

680
00:46:05.840 --> 00:46:14.720
All of that is to actually start is it's kind of like a lower rung on the ladder that it's easier

681
00:46:14.720 --> 00:46:20.800
to grab ahold of is I tell people, okay, enjoy yourself, delight in yourself. Think of the things

682
00:46:20.800 --> 00:46:28.480
that you really enjoy, start doing those and enjoy yourself while you're doing it, really connect,

683
00:46:28.480 --> 00:46:35.760
be in the present moment with it and delight, not just in what you're doing, but in the, in yourself

684
00:46:36.560 --> 00:46:42.880
enjoying it. And you'll find that that'll be the greatest delight is how you feel is how you feel

685
00:46:42.880 --> 00:46:50.640
that you in your natural state without trying are just, are just loving what it is that you're doing.

686
00:46:50.640 --> 00:46:56.880
And so therefore that is connecting with your actual being with who you really are very naturally

687
00:46:56.880 --> 00:47:01.360
and how you and the Lord are naturally expressing yourself. Like I've told y'all before for me,

688
00:47:01.360 --> 00:47:07.520
it's with it. One of my things is with sewing. I love it. I even think it's surprising. I think

689
00:47:07.520 --> 00:47:13.360
it's a little, I don't know. I don't want to say odd, but I think it's very surprising, but I do.

690
00:47:13.360 --> 00:47:16.800
I absolutely love it. I do not understand why.

691
00:47:16.800 --> 00:47:17.440
What do you sew?

692
00:47:21.120 --> 00:47:27.040
Well, I do that. And I do, I do, I do quilting and stuff like that. And I quilt by hand.

693
00:47:27.040 --> 00:47:32.080
And then so, and then I do, I do a really serious knitter,

694
00:47:34.080 --> 00:47:40.720
very serious. I make sweaters and stuff like that. And, and so, but, and, and I love knitting

695
00:47:40.720 --> 00:47:45.120
and that's one of my absolute hands-on favorite things to do. I do that more than sewing. However,

696
00:47:45.680 --> 00:47:50.320
sewing makes me feel like, I don't know. I heard one time on a, on a show that it's

697
00:47:50.320 --> 00:47:57.120
like a box of firecrackers has exploded inside me, you know, so excited. And so

698
00:47:57.120 --> 00:48:06.240
there's an aspect in which I feel very close to myself when I, when I, when I do some,

699
00:48:06.240 --> 00:48:13.120
when I do certain things that I just naturally really enjoy. And so, so stuff like that are,

700
00:48:13.120 --> 00:48:19.040
are like tools and practical things that we can do that can help us start to make those

701
00:48:19.040 --> 00:48:25.120
connections. If we're finding it too difficult to, to bridge the gap and choose that he loves

702
00:48:25.120 --> 00:48:29.360
us as unconditionally as he says that he does, you know, et cetera. Those are some things that

703
00:48:29.360 --> 00:48:36.000
we can do. Does that help answer your question? Yes, yes, it does. And I just, I need to be

704
00:48:36.560 --> 00:48:45.600
just to be patient and be in my process. I need to be in my process and, and just, you know,

705
00:48:45.600 --> 00:48:52.160
you say it's funny with the sewing. Back in a few months ago, I went to Amish country in Ohio.

706
00:48:53.840 --> 00:49:02.480
And I couldn't, so many Amish people and I couldn't stop staring at their stitching,

707
00:49:02.800 --> 00:49:10.800
at their clothes. I mean, it's just so amazing at the stitching. I don't know if you've ever seen

708
00:49:11.360 --> 00:49:16.000
them actually, cause they sew all their, they make all their clothes and, and you're just,

709
00:49:16.000 --> 00:49:23.200
it's really, really amazing at how, but yeah, I love to sew too. I'm going to, I'm just getting

710
00:49:23.200 --> 00:49:30.560
back into it. So fun. Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. So I don't know what it would be. I don't know

711
00:49:30.560 --> 00:49:34.640
if it would be the sewing, if it'd be something else, you know, you can just do those things.

712
00:49:34.640 --> 00:49:39.120
And, and then also choose that when you're doing the, the normal boring things, because that's

713
00:49:39.120 --> 00:49:44.960
the majority of the things that I, that I was doing, that I was teaching myself to delight in

714
00:49:44.960 --> 00:49:49.280
myself was I was doing the boring things. I was washing the dishes. I was making breakfast. I

715
00:49:49.280 --> 00:49:56.880
was taking a shower. It was in the normal everyday life that, that I just had to choose. Okay,

716
00:49:56.880 --> 00:50:00.320
Ashley, what does God say? I had to choose him.

717
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:07.360
over my circumstances and my natural response to my circumstances, so it helps me, but I was able

718
00:50:07.360 --> 00:50:11.840
to do that, but then there are other, but some people, if they can't, or if you're just having

719
00:50:11.840 --> 00:50:16.080
a particularly challenging day, you choose something that's a bit easier, you choose

720
00:50:16.080 --> 00:50:22.160
something you really enjoy, you know, as opposed to a natural, you know, chore that we do, you know,

721
00:50:22.160 --> 00:50:30.400
or whatever, and in order to connect with who actually am I, anyway, and then you can begin

722
00:50:30.400 --> 00:50:35.520
to operate a bit more out of your being, but remember, and you had talked about this, so this

723
00:50:35.520 --> 00:50:40.720
is great, so you already have it on your mind, just remember that it's okay to be wherever it

724
00:50:40.720 --> 00:50:45.120
is that you are, the reason that I say that is, you know, you had mentioned, oh, well, sometimes

725
00:50:45.120 --> 00:50:49.280
it just takes time, that's that, and so I just wanted to affirm, yeah, that's absolutely true,

726
00:50:49.280 --> 00:50:54.240
the more that you just allow yourself to be where you are and you don't judge yourself,

727
00:50:54.240 --> 00:51:00.640
the more that you quickly, that you connect with your actual being, so, because you're actually

728
00:51:00.640 --> 00:51:08.880
allowing who it is that you are to show up and to express itself without fear of being condemned

729
00:51:08.880 --> 00:51:14.240
and shut down, so, and I think it was, I think it was Tammy I was talking to about this, you know,

730
00:51:14.320 --> 00:51:19.600
in like one of the fireside chats or one of the other rest groups, it's probably a fireside chat,

731
00:51:19.600 --> 00:51:24.960
I was encouraging her because she was talking about, oh, what was it, was it, oh, it was the

732
00:51:24.960 --> 00:51:29.440
positive stuff, I was, you know, because she was practicing like, okay, what are the things that,

733
00:51:29.440 --> 00:51:33.440
you know, are really enjoying, that really I delight in, and then I just, it just came to

734
00:51:33.440 --> 00:51:37.360
my mind because she wasn't talking about like the negative things, but I was like,

735
00:51:37.360 --> 00:51:42.960
I just popped it in my mind, so I just said, okay, and just FYI, you know, delight,

736
00:51:42.960 --> 00:51:49.040
remember to delight in yourself and not get discouraged when you don't have the good emotions,

737
00:51:49.040 --> 00:51:53.600
so not just that, oh, this feels wonderful, oh my goodness, I just feel like I just,

738
00:51:53.600 --> 00:51:58.560
lighting, lighting up inside and I just love doing this or doing something neutral like doing the

739
00:51:58.560 --> 00:52:05.120
dishes or whatever, like, like even the negative things, like, okay, I really don't, I'm mad right

740
00:52:05.120 --> 00:52:14.080
now or I am scared or I am whatever, you know, in, take the opportunity to choose yourself in

741
00:52:14.080 --> 00:52:21.040
those moments so that yourself knows that no matter what it can throw at you, that you really

742
00:52:21.040 --> 00:52:26.960
are a safe place for it, that you really can be the parent that loves it unconditionally,

743
00:52:28.560 --> 00:52:34.080
so, and I could be totally wrong, Rita, but when you talked about your dream earlier,

744
00:52:34.080 --> 00:52:39.280
that's something I was thinking of, you said you had a dream about a kid, it could be, I mean,

745
00:52:39.280 --> 00:52:45.120
who knows what that thing is, but as soon as it, and so you can ask the Lord, but as soon, and I

746
00:52:45.120 --> 00:52:50.000
have a lot of dreams about, about children and babies and the fact that other people are taking

747
00:52:50.000 --> 00:52:55.760
care of them and in the dream, I keep going back and forth about should I, you know, should I take

748
00:52:56.480 --> 00:53:01.680
the child, you know, should I take responsibility of this child, even though it's not mine, you know,

749
00:53:01.680 --> 00:53:06.240
should I take responsibility, and then there are other times where I've taken responsibility of a

750
00:53:06.240 --> 00:53:11.200
child and for whatever reason, I give that responsibility away, I mean, none of these

751
00:53:11.200 --> 00:53:17.040
children are children that I've birthed in these dreams, these are all children that I don't know,

752
00:53:17.040 --> 00:53:20.880
they're like orphans or they're like, I don't know, they're whatever, I suddenly find myself

753
00:53:20.880 --> 00:53:26.400
with this baby and feel responsible, but I find that in the dreams, someone else ends up always

754
00:53:26.400 --> 00:53:31.680
kind of being responsible, either it starts out that way, and I'm kind of wondering if I should

755
00:53:31.680 --> 00:53:38.640
take the responsibility because it's being offered to me, or I give it away, and then I wonder if I

756
00:53:38.640 --> 00:53:45.360
should take it back, and so I don't know fully what yours is, but it's possible that it's you,

757
00:53:46.640 --> 00:53:54.160
do you want to take, do you like, you're a precious thing, do you want to parent yourself,

758
00:53:54.880 --> 00:54:00.800
you're like, say for instance, if you were a child, like not if you were, but what I mean is like way

759
00:54:00.800 --> 00:54:08.080
back when you were a child, would you want you now, like you being an adult, would you take that

760
00:54:08.080 --> 00:54:16.000
little girl on, of course you would, we all would, you know, because we, at the root of it, we all

761
00:54:16.000 --> 00:54:22.720
love our little girl selves that was hurt, and that was scared, and we being the parent, and we

762
00:54:22.720 --> 00:54:27.280
being older now, we look back and we're like, oh my word, I know so much more than now, I know that

763
00:54:27.280 --> 00:54:32.400
they got onto themselves about things that weren't their fault, they took on responsibility that

764
00:54:32.400 --> 00:54:38.080
wasn't theirs, we're like, I'm sorry you didn't feel loved in x, y, and z situation, or maybe

765
00:54:38.080 --> 00:54:43.600
you like for your whole childhood, or whatever everyone's situations might be, you'd want to

766
00:54:43.600 --> 00:54:49.440
fix that, you're like, I will take you on, I will fix that, I will make sure you feel loved, I will

767
00:54:49.440 --> 00:54:55.280
make sure I give you what it is that you need, so it's possible, maybe not, you can just ask the

768
00:54:55.280 --> 00:54:59.840
Lord, but it's possible that the Lord was telling you, you know, giving you an opportunity, hey this is

769
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:07.600
precious little girl, do you want you? Do you want to take on the responsibility of fully loving

770
00:55:08.160 --> 00:55:13.440
yourself? You know, fully, you know, taking care of you. So anyway, but I was, I just threw that

771
00:55:13.440 --> 00:55:19.360
in there because I remember that dream that you had. But, but yeah, so I would just encourage

772
00:55:19.360 --> 00:55:29.360
you all again to just really, to be intentional about enjoying yourself and delighting in you.

773
00:55:30.000 --> 00:55:34.000
You may not like the fact that you feel the way that you do, like, oh, I'm feeling mad or I'm

774
00:55:34.000 --> 00:55:38.880
feeling whatever you may feel. I mean, none of us like that feeling. That's what we're talking

775
00:55:38.880 --> 00:55:44.480
about. We're talking about unconditional love and acceptance that choose to delight in the

776
00:55:44.480 --> 00:55:51.840
essence of who you are instead of rejecting you because you feel a particular way. I noticed

777
00:55:51.840 --> 00:55:58.720
that my feelings, I even did this yesterday. In fact, it was almost exactly 24 hours from this

778
00:55:58.720 --> 00:56:05.280
moment that I was having a very, very, very difficult time about something that I ran into.

779
00:56:05.280 --> 00:56:11.680
And I am telling you what I was just sitting there and I was like, oh my goodness, this feeling

780
00:56:11.680 --> 00:56:18.480
is absolutely horrible. And I thought, okay, actually just, just accept yourself feeling this

781
00:56:18.480 --> 00:56:23.920
way. I wasn't accepting the feeling. I wasn't glorifying it. I wasn't saying it was godly.

782
00:56:23.920 --> 00:56:29.840
I just, just, I was accepting me and I felt like that. I'm like, okay, this is how I feel.

783
00:56:30.720 --> 00:56:36.000
And immediately the intensity went away immediately. And this was no little deal,

784
00:56:36.000 --> 00:56:42.080
by the way. And immediately, I mean, my little girl woundings were majorly,

785
00:56:42.080 --> 00:56:48.320
majorly triggered, majorly. And I just like, okay, this is how I feel right now. And I am

786
00:56:48.320 --> 00:56:54.320
telling you what that weight dropped like that. It was so fast. It's like, okay, I'm over it.

787
00:56:56.000 --> 00:57:02.560
I'm serious. It's really weird because you're, you're dropping the resistance. The resistance

788
00:57:02.560 --> 00:57:08.240
is what makes everything that much harder. So everything just becomes so much easier if we

789
00:57:08.240 --> 00:57:12.000
stop resisting. So that was something I was thinking of, you know, again, coming full

790
00:57:12.000 --> 00:57:17.040
circle again, Diana, about what we were talking about, that the less that you, the more that you

791
00:57:17.440 --> 00:57:21.680
accept yourself for where it is that you are, the faster you'll move through the process.

792
00:57:22.320 --> 00:57:27.120
And, and you'll shift from the doing into the being, you'll shift from the, from the flesh

793
00:57:27.120 --> 00:57:33.600
into the spirit. And you just kind of let it all happen and not resist the negative things when

794
00:57:33.600 --> 00:57:40.320
they come up, looking at it and going, see, this proves to me I'm not as far as long as I hoped I

795
00:57:40.320 --> 00:57:45.040
was, because, you know, I haven't had an instance for the past 10 days. And all of a sudden I had

796
00:57:45.040 --> 00:57:50.480
one, you know, and, and to start seeing it as like this land, this indicator of, oh, I'm not

797
00:57:52.000 --> 00:58:00.560
don't in any way, take, take things that happen as being any indication of you whatsoever, because

798
00:58:00.560 --> 00:58:07.760
you're not, you're feeling, you're not what you're feeling. You are not what you are not believing

799
00:58:07.760 --> 00:58:12.880
about God. Cause remember you were, you're in you, the identity is seated in your spirit and it's,

800
00:58:12.880 --> 00:58:19.920
and it's fine. It has, it's, it's already achieved everything. It's, it's already perfect.

801
00:58:19.920 --> 00:58:25.760
It's got nowhere higher to be. It's 100% one with the Lord. You know, it's just your soul and your

802
00:58:25.760 --> 00:58:33.440
body that we can all, we can all find compassion for that part of ourselves because it's afraid.

803
00:58:34.160 --> 00:58:40.000
It thinks that God really isn't that good, that he really isn't as good as he really is.

804
00:58:40.000 --> 00:58:49.360
So in other words, it has nothing but good things to learn. There's no bad things to learn.

805
00:58:50.640 --> 00:58:57.520
There's no, there's no shoe in the truth of what God created that we're waiting to drop.

806
00:58:58.880 --> 00:59:04.960
In other words, there's no real shoe that will drop. There's no real negative. That's worse

807
00:59:04.960 --> 00:59:10.400
than what we thought or worse than what we got. It's all better. So we can just have compassion

808
00:59:10.400 --> 00:59:15.120
that our soul and our body thinks that this is as good as it gets. And that it really is this

809
00:59:15.120 --> 00:59:19.440
hard. And then if we're don't work very vigilantly, it's just going to be harder.

810
00:59:20.560 --> 00:59:29.360
None of that is true. None. So anyway, is that helpful? I give a lot there gave a lot of context.

811
00:59:29.440 --> 00:59:37.120
We went on a few muddy trails. Thank you. You're welcome. So does anything,

812
00:59:37.120 --> 00:59:41.200
does anyone have anything else before we, before we jump off?

813
00:59:43.680 --> 00:59:51.520
Real quick. You friends are hilarious. I was going to ask him for her if she did. Okay.

814
00:59:51.520 --> 00:59:59.840
Oh, I was going to bring up the little baby again. So I'm

815
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:03.680
understand. Yeah, I don't. Yeah, usually it's not my child.

816
01:00:03.680 --> 01:00:08.120
It's Yeah, so I understand the child thing. So I am supposed to

817
01:00:08.120 --> 01:00:11.320
parent myself. Is that what you're saying? And accept

818
01:00:11.320 --> 01:00:11.920
myself?

819
01:00:12.760 --> 01:00:15.760
Yeah, so I don't know if that's what the dream means. But when I

820
01:00:15.760 --> 01:00:19.040
heard you telling Tammy about it, I was like, that was the

821
01:00:19.040 --> 01:00:22.480
first thing that popped into my head was that kind of like we

822
01:00:22.480 --> 01:00:26.200
all we all talk about having an inner child. There's an ad and

823
01:00:26.200 --> 01:00:29.720
then so sometimes it's part of like an inner healing process.

824
01:00:30.560 --> 01:00:36.000
And it is helpful to imagine going back to that little child

825
01:00:36.000 --> 01:00:39.920
like inside of us not like way back then. But like they'll like

826
01:00:39.920 --> 01:00:42.720
a psychologist or whatever counselor will say, hey, you

827
01:00:42.720 --> 01:00:46.520
know, imagine the scene again, and then go and talk to your

828
01:00:46.520 --> 01:00:49.120
little self or whatever, you know, and it sounds really

829
01:00:49.120 --> 01:00:52.520
hokey, but I'm telling you what it really works. And so because

830
01:00:52.520 --> 01:00:55.760
it's just it's a it's an anchor. It's an anchor for our souls.

831
01:00:55.760 --> 01:00:58.760
It kind of like, okay, that I can understand. Otherwise,

832
01:00:58.760 --> 01:01:01.960
theoretical, conceptual, oh, inner healing, believe this,

833
01:01:01.960 --> 01:01:04.680
believe that it's really hard for us to grasp. But if we

834
01:01:04.680 --> 01:01:08.880
imagine that little child of us again, and we go back and talk

835
01:01:08.880 --> 01:01:12.480
to it, that helps heal us because we're our soul can walk

836
01:01:12.480 --> 01:01:15.440
through that our soul can understand that. So my point is

837
01:01:15.440 --> 01:01:22.520
that we have these aspects of ourselves that get stunted when

838
01:01:22.560 --> 01:01:27.280
we have been traumatized at a particular age, in a particular

839
01:01:27.280 --> 01:01:30.480
area, like say, for instance, if you were five, when you

840
01:01:30.760 --> 01:01:33.760
started believing something about yourself, or in it

841
01:01:33.760 --> 01:01:36.880
started being affirmed and entrenched in you in a very

842
01:01:37.080 --> 01:01:41.800
significant way, sometimes it will emotionally stunt us to

843
01:01:41.800 --> 01:01:44.440
five years old in that particular area of our life,

844
01:01:44.440 --> 01:01:48.400
which is why we are very embarrassed at how we act when

845
01:01:48.400 --> 01:01:52.400
we're triggered. We act like children in those areas. Why?

846
01:01:52.400 --> 01:01:56.280
Because we were stunted. It's as if we were stunted emotionally

847
01:01:56.280 --> 01:02:00.640
at that age to that age. So you go back and allow that aspect of

848
01:02:00.640 --> 01:02:04.440
you, you heal it and you talk to it, and you allow it to grow up

849
01:02:04.840 --> 01:02:10.240
is I know it's very strange, but that's what that's what it when

850
01:02:10.240 --> 01:02:13.880
you actually walk through the inner healing yourself or with

851
01:02:13.880 --> 01:02:16.120
someone else, that's actually what ends up happening. It's

852
01:02:16.120 --> 01:02:20.400
like this, that that part of you grows up. So it was all of those

853
01:02:20.400 --> 01:02:22.400
things that I was kind of thinking when you were talking

854
01:02:22.400 --> 01:02:25.000
about the dream is like, I wonder if God is just telling

855
01:02:25.000 --> 01:02:29.800
her, hey, there's this aspect of her that is that is of ever

856
01:02:29.800 --> 01:02:35.080
being that we can so easily relate to and connect with, if

857
01:02:35.080 --> 01:02:38.600
we think of it as a child, because we don't expect anything

858
01:02:38.600 --> 01:02:41.920
of it. So yet you you at whatever age you are, you've got

859
01:02:41.920 --> 01:02:44.680
all kinds of expectations of yourself and what you should be

860
01:02:44.680 --> 01:02:47.480
or what anyone should be when they're your age. Well, I'm an

861
01:02:47.480 --> 01:02:52.080
adult and I should be should be should be. But if you imagine

862
01:02:52.080 --> 01:02:55.360
that yourself as this child, it's a lot easier to connect

863
01:02:55.600 --> 01:02:59.680
with the person that God sees you as now, which is perfect,

864
01:02:59.800 --> 01:03:03.440
which is innocent, which is treasured, which is, you know,

865
01:03:04.240 --> 01:03:09.360
delightable, and everything. So if you imagine yourself as that

866
01:03:09.360 --> 01:03:12.920
child, like not even like, I don't know if he's telling you,

867
01:03:12.920 --> 01:03:17.520
you know, you could you could that hate to take yourself on

868
01:03:17.520 --> 01:03:21.920
isn't like, I know the fact that you need some emotional healing

869
01:03:21.920 --> 01:03:27.440
and so love, love that little girl that needed or wanted x, y

870
01:03:27.440 --> 01:03:32.080
and z. But I think that it may may even mean, you know, just

871
01:03:32.080 --> 01:03:37.360
you now, but it's easier for you to see as a child, because you

872
01:03:37.360 --> 01:03:40.080
don't even have any expectations of it. And God's like, okay,

873
01:03:40.080 --> 01:03:43.880
that is how I see you now. You're that treasured, you're

874
01:03:43.880 --> 01:03:49.000
that special. You're that, you know, innocent, enjoy that

875
01:03:49.000 --> 01:03:53.880
person understand that that is who you are. Do you want to

876
01:03:53.880 --> 01:03:58.680
reject you? Or do you want to actually fully allow yourself to

877
01:03:58.680 --> 01:04:02.760
be yourself so that you can you that who it is that you really

878
01:04:02.760 --> 01:04:07.400
are, can feel safe enough to come out to be like what we were

879
01:04:07.400 --> 01:04:11.440
talking about with Diana to actually be out of who you are,

880
01:04:11.440 --> 01:04:15.760
instead of always trying to think what should I do by this,

881
01:04:15.880 --> 01:04:19.880
the by this age, or by this maturity in the Lord, or by

882
01:04:19.880 --> 01:04:23.920
this career, you know, point my life, you know, instead of

883
01:04:23.920 --> 01:04:26.560
trying to think, well, what what standards should I be hitting?

884
01:04:26.560 --> 01:04:30.880
And what what mark should I be checking off? Instead of that,

885
01:04:31.200 --> 01:04:38.000
you know, who actually am I into just into just be but you're not

886
01:04:38.000 --> 01:04:42.560
going to know that unless you see yourself the way that you

887
01:04:42.560 --> 01:04:46.560
know, like that baby, and then you have to fully accept you,

888
01:04:46.560 --> 01:04:48.720
you can't read and I'm not telling you that you're

889
01:04:48.720 --> 01:04:51.840
rejecting, I'm talking in theoretically, whoever would do

890
01:04:51.840 --> 01:04:55.120
this can't, they can't, they've got to stop rejecting

891
01:04:55.120 --> 01:04:58.800
themselves. I have a very strong tendency to reject myself. This

892
01:04:58.800 --> 01:04:59.920
is this is why I teach them.

893
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:04.880
because I know this. I can feel it within me and God started to give me the words,

894
01:05:04.880 --> 01:05:11.040
Ashley, this is what you're doing. You're rejecting you. And I've entrusted you

895
01:05:11.760 --> 01:05:17.920
with you before I've entrusted you with anything else and with anyone else. And so you need to take

896
01:05:17.920 --> 01:05:24.720
that very seriously. And if I've entrusted you with it, something I cannot have you reject it

897
01:05:25.280 --> 01:05:32.160
because, you know, I mean, the Lord talks about what, how he, what he will do to fight for and

898
01:05:32.160 --> 01:05:37.440
to protect things that are not being protected, like the widows and the orphans that are being

899
01:05:37.440 --> 01:05:43.920
abandoned and whatever. So God does the same thing for us. He's like, you need to accept

900
01:05:43.920 --> 01:05:49.680
yourself fully. He said, I'm trying to protect you and your body is trying to protect itself

901
01:05:49.680 --> 01:05:55.840
from you. Your soul is trying to protect itself from you. You need to fully receive you. So

902
01:05:55.840 --> 01:06:04.560
anyway, um, could be wrong, but I do pay attention to the things that just pop up without me trying

903
01:06:04.560 --> 01:06:09.600
to think of anything in the moment, you know, when they, when someone said it and that's what

904
01:06:09.600 --> 01:06:14.240
popped into my head. So you can ask the Lord about it, but, and I, I could be wrong. I don't

905
01:06:14.960 --> 01:06:20.560
think that it's about, you know, your past and your, your, you know, and, and their part of

906
01:06:20.560 --> 01:06:24.720
yourself that needs to be healed. I mean, I'm sure that you have them because we all do,

907
01:06:25.600 --> 01:06:32.000
but I think that maybe because of the timing that it's probably about, you know, just, um, uh, that

908
01:06:32.000 --> 01:06:36.160
it's probably about that is how he sees you. And he wants you to fully accept who it is that you

909
01:06:36.160 --> 01:06:43.840
are, because he sees you as innocently and as, as need of love and attention and being cared for as

910
01:06:43.840 --> 01:06:52.160
that baby does. It can't survive on its own. It really does need to be nurtured and loved on and

911
01:06:52.160 --> 01:06:59.280
treated very tenderly without any responsibilities or expectations other than just being loved for

912
01:06:59.280 --> 01:07:06.240
being it. Anyway, those are my thoughts. You can ask the Lord. No, it sounds right.

913
01:07:08.960 --> 01:07:11.280
Sometimes we just know we're like, no, I think that's right.

914
01:07:12.080 --> 01:07:18.560
Okay. I'm glad that's occurred. All right. Well, was there anything else before we jump off? I

915
01:07:18.560 --> 01:07:24.640
didn't want to cut any, anyone off the side, open the floor. Well, I know Rita, when you were

916
01:07:24.640 --> 01:07:31.440
talking to, you were talking about the, a coworker or whatever, I guess they kind of made an accusation

917
01:07:31.440 --> 01:07:38.480
against you and like, not in a loving way or kind way and kind of like a shaming way. So I guess I

918
01:07:38.480 --> 01:07:42.080
don't, do you remember that? Didn't we say there was a question around that? Do you remember what

919
01:07:42.080 --> 01:07:49.760
it was? Yeah. It's kind of like in the moment, you know, I, I felt threatened and then I guess,

920
01:07:51.600 --> 01:07:57.840
how to let that go and just receive it as instruction or not receive it so negatively.

921
01:07:57.840 --> 01:08:03.280
Cause you know, I start self condemning like, ah, I made a mistake, you know, and then I have all

922
01:08:03.280 --> 01:08:10.320
these negative feelings toward them and toward myself. Yeah. What I, what I used to do is I used

923
01:08:10.320 --> 01:08:16.880
to disassociate myself from what I did. Cause I was, I would be in those situations too at work

924
01:08:16.880 --> 01:08:24.720
and and I would just have to disassociate myself and be like, okay. And who, who am I to the Lord?

925
01:08:24.720 --> 01:08:30.240
Not, not what am I good at? What's my personality? Who am I to the Lord? And am I enough?

926
01:08:31.200 --> 01:08:36.240
And, and, and so again, I had to choose, okay, am I unconditionally loved and accepted? I'm

927
01:08:36.240 --> 01:08:42.080
unified with him. And they couldn't be concepts. I had to choose that union. I had to choose

928
01:08:42.080 --> 01:08:47.680
that. I really am that loved and accepted. And then I had to just kind of like, I don't know,

929
01:08:47.680 --> 01:08:52.640
I had to choose it. That was the reality of my existence, the reality of the world that I lived

930
01:08:52.640 --> 01:08:59.600
in. I had to, I had to just take God strictly at his word. Cause I didn't feel like it, especially

931
01:08:59.600 --> 01:09:04.720
in situations like that. I had to disconnect my identity from what it is that I did.

932
01:09:05.600 --> 01:09:10.720
And like, yeah, but who am I? Okay. Well, I'm, I'm actually enough. I'm actually okay.

933
01:09:11.439 --> 01:09:18.960
This I'm, I'm not bad. I'm not evil. I did this, but I'm learning about how to do certain things

934
01:09:18.960 --> 01:09:24.080
in life and I'm learning certain principles and I'm learning what's, what's really what'll help

935
01:09:24.080 --> 01:09:29.439
things progress and what'll help and what'll cause things to regress, you know, and projects

936
01:09:29.439 --> 01:09:34.000
and whatever. So it's a learning experience, but it has nothing to do with who I am. The,

937
01:09:34.000 --> 01:09:38.880
who I am is simply living out a nerve Lee experience, but it's not defining me.

938
01:09:39.600 --> 01:09:45.600
It's not whatever. And so that's, that's what helps me because you're still dealing with the

939
01:09:45.600 --> 01:09:50.560
reality of, look, you did something that in our world is called a mistake. Now, I don't know if

940
01:09:50.560 --> 01:09:56.160
you did, but I'm telling you, like, if it's like worst case scenario, you know, that I would live

941
01:09:56.160 --> 01:09:59.840
through, like, no, I really did do that. And I shouldn't do that again. You know, kind of a thing.

942
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:02.240
I would think, well, it is reality.

943
01:10:02.240 --> 01:10:03.280
So you're not telling yourself,

944
01:10:03.280 --> 01:10:04.120
oh, it didn't matter.

945
01:10:04.120 --> 01:10:04.940
It did.

946
01:10:06.080 --> 01:10:07.640
So it's in the face of that,

947
01:10:07.640 --> 01:10:12.440
that I have to choose to separate my identity.

948
01:10:12.440 --> 01:10:14.760
And it's not real,

949
01:10:14.760 --> 01:10:17.240
if I don't acknowledge the reality

950
01:10:17.240 --> 01:10:19.480
of what it is that I did.

951
01:10:19.480 --> 01:10:20.840
I acknowledge that, okay,

952
01:10:20.840 --> 01:10:22.640
so I shouldn't have done this.

953
01:10:22.640 --> 01:10:23.640
Or maybe you should have,

954
01:10:23.640 --> 01:10:27.700
and they just thought that you shouldn't have been,

955
01:10:27.700 --> 01:10:30.100
it was just a matter of opinion, whatever.

956
01:10:30.100 --> 01:10:33.340
Point is, that whatever it is,

957
01:10:33.340 --> 01:10:36.300
that you are not what you've done,

958
01:10:36.300 --> 01:10:38.220
or not done, or whatever.

959
01:10:38.220 --> 01:10:42.220
And then because we really do have to choose

960
01:10:42.220 --> 01:10:44.060
that that is our,

961
01:10:44.060 --> 01:10:47.300
that that's the, what's the word?

962
01:10:47.300 --> 01:10:49.340
That that's the most important thing,

963
01:10:49.340 --> 01:10:50.500
that that's our value,

964
01:10:50.500 --> 01:10:52.860
is our identity, not what we do.

965
01:10:52.860 --> 01:10:54.560
And then it can,

966
01:10:54.560 --> 01:10:56.920
and the strongest place

967
01:10:56.920 --> 01:10:59.080
to make a record of that in yourself,

968
01:10:59.080 --> 01:11:03.880
is when something happens that is bad.

969
01:11:03.880 --> 01:11:05.760
In other words, that you have done something

970
01:11:05.760 --> 01:11:07.120
that you even disagree with.

971
01:11:07.120 --> 01:11:09.000
You're like, yeah, I shouldn't have done that.

972
01:11:09.000 --> 01:11:11.040
Or you sin.

973
01:11:11.040 --> 01:11:12.920
Yeah, I know I shouldn't have done that.

974
01:11:12.920 --> 01:11:14.080
Or no, I don't wanna do that.

975
01:11:14.080 --> 01:11:16.720
Or I know exactly what God says about that.

976
01:11:16.720 --> 01:11:19.240
Those are literally the strongest,

977
01:11:19.240 --> 01:11:22.320
most impactful times for you to make a particular choice

978
01:11:22.320 --> 01:11:25.720
to disassociate yourself from what you've done.

979
01:11:25.720 --> 01:11:28.240
Disassociate, meaning like disassociate your identity.

980
01:11:28.240 --> 01:11:29.720
It's not that you wanna disassociate

981
01:11:29.720 --> 01:11:31.880
because you have to acknowledge that it's real,

982
01:11:31.880 --> 01:11:33.320
and that it's important,

983
01:11:33.320 --> 01:11:36.840
in order for your choice to actually mean something.

984
01:11:36.840 --> 01:11:38.760
Because if you're ignoring that this exists,

985
01:11:38.760 --> 01:11:40.560
or you're ignoring the impact of it,

986
01:11:40.560 --> 01:11:42.480
you're not really making the choice.

987
01:11:42.480 --> 01:11:43.880
The only way you can really make a choice

988
01:11:43.880 --> 01:11:46.840
is if there's two things to choose from.

989
01:11:46.840 --> 01:11:48.560
This has to be a legitimate choice

990
01:11:48.560 --> 01:11:52.360
in order for this one to actually count

991
01:11:52.360 --> 01:11:53.920
as a choice that you make.

992
01:11:56.080 --> 01:11:58.720
But anyway, so as hard as those things are,

993
01:11:58.720 --> 01:12:00.480
that's when everything changes,

994
01:12:00.480 --> 01:12:03.520
is when you do it in the hard times.

995
01:12:03.520 --> 01:12:06.000
So anyway, that's what I used to do.

996
01:12:06.000 --> 01:12:08.480
But that's how I would handle situations like that,

997
01:12:08.480 --> 01:12:11.920
is I just disassociated my identity from it.

998
01:12:11.920 --> 01:12:16.920
And no, please understand, it's not easy.

999
01:12:17.000 --> 01:12:19.320
I'm just talking about it.

1000
01:12:19.320 --> 01:12:22.200
And so when we talk about it, it all sounds easy.

1001
01:12:22.200 --> 01:12:26.480
I'm telling you this, remembering, it's very hard.

1002
01:12:26.480 --> 01:12:28.760
It is very hard because you feel,

1003
01:12:28.760 --> 01:12:31.720
well, at least I do, I feel ugly inside.

1004
01:12:31.720 --> 01:12:35.200
I just feel yuck and everything.

1005
01:12:35.200 --> 01:12:38.280
And I had to choose, what does God say?

1006
01:12:38.280 --> 01:12:41.960
And does what God say, is that more important to me

1007
01:12:41.960 --> 01:12:43.360
or is it not?

1008
01:12:43.360 --> 01:12:47.000
Or is me and how I feel more important to me?

1009
01:12:47.000 --> 01:12:48.720
And I had to make a choice.

1010
01:12:48.720 --> 01:12:51.160
And so, and yeah, it's hard.

1011
01:12:51.160 --> 01:12:53.840
So, but anyway, is it helpful?

1012
01:12:53.840 --> 01:12:55.560
Yes, definitely, yeah.

1013
01:12:55.560 --> 01:12:56.440
All right.

1014
01:12:56.440 --> 01:12:57.400
Thank you.

1015
01:12:57.400 --> 01:12:58.840
You're welcome.

1016
01:12:58.840 --> 01:13:01.320
I have one more follow-up question about that,

1017
01:13:01.320 --> 01:13:04.440
because I've dealt with this at work too.

1018
01:13:04.440 --> 01:13:05.600
And I think I deal with it

1019
01:13:05.600 --> 01:13:07.640
with just my personal relationship too.

1020
01:13:09.880 --> 01:13:12.560
Is there a way of like,

1021
01:13:12.560 --> 01:13:16.240
if you feel that someone has treated you in an unkind

1022
01:13:16.240 --> 01:13:21.240
or unloving way to address them in rest, you know?

1023
01:13:22.800 --> 01:13:24.280
Is there a way to do it?

1024
01:13:24.280 --> 01:13:28.800
Yeah, like, what's, can you walk us through that?

1025
01:13:28.800 --> 01:13:31.120
Like, it's like, oh no, like that wasn't okay.

1026
01:13:31.120 --> 01:13:33.160
That wasn't kind, that wasn't cool.

1027
01:13:33.160 --> 01:13:34.240
You know what I mean?

1028
01:13:36.080 --> 01:13:36.920
I don't know.

1029
01:13:36.920 --> 01:13:38.160
I just feel like sometimes as Christians,

1030
01:13:38.160 --> 01:13:39.680
like this is me even speaking,

1031
01:13:39.680 --> 01:13:41.800
like I identify with what Rita said,

1032
01:13:41.800 --> 01:13:43.680
but I've experienced this myself,

1033
01:13:43.680 --> 01:13:47.480
where it's kind of like, okay, like, you know,

1034
01:13:47.480 --> 01:13:49.480
we're taught like, oh, well, you know,

1035
01:13:49.480 --> 01:13:51.600
turn the other cheek, yada, yada, yada.

1036
01:13:51.600 --> 01:13:55.920
But you're like, okay, at what point do I say,

1037
01:13:55.920 --> 01:13:57.800
do I stand up for myself?

1038
01:13:57.800 --> 01:14:00.840
But I do, how do I do that in a way of rest,

1039
01:14:00.840 --> 01:14:04.920
where I speak like the truth or my truth about a situation?

1040
01:14:04.920 --> 01:14:06.400
You know what I'm saying?

1041
01:14:06.400 --> 01:14:08.240
Yeah, yeah.

1042
01:14:08.280 --> 01:14:12.960
Well, the easiest way to do it,

1043
01:14:12.960 --> 01:14:15.000
I say, well, sorry, the simplest way to do it.

1044
01:14:15.000 --> 01:14:18.440
Simplest way to do it is, not easy, I know,

1045
01:14:18.440 --> 01:14:22.760
but the simplest way to do it is to actually, you know,

1046
01:14:22.760 --> 01:14:24.360
shift into your identity, you know,

1047
01:14:24.360 --> 01:14:26.160
choose, remember what God said,

1048
01:14:26.160 --> 01:14:28.000
who God says that you actually are.

1049
01:14:28.000 --> 01:14:31.480
One of the ways to do that is to do what I do sometimes,

1050
01:14:31.480 --> 01:14:33.120
which is, okay, Christ, you know,

1051
01:14:33.120 --> 01:14:34.400
I believe that I came out of you.

1052
01:14:34.400 --> 01:14:36.880
I believe that I've been reinserted back into you,

1053
01:14:36.880 --> 01:14:38.840
that I abide in you and you abide in me.

1054
01:14:38.840 --> 01:14:40.960
We abide in the father and the father abides in us,

1055
01:14:40.960 --> 01:14:42.880
and therefore I'm always about my father's business,

1056
01:14:42.880 --> 01:14:44.920
to kind of like walk myself through that.

1057
01:14:46.360 --> 01:14:50.240
But, and if you do it, when you have time,

1058
01:14:50.240 --> 01:14:52.240
it'll become much more familiar

1059
01:14:52.240 --> 01:14:54.800
so that it's easier for you to do it without,

1060
01:14:54.800 --> 01:14:57.320
if you don't have time to walk yourself through that.

1061
01:14:57.320 --> 01:14:59.240
Like say, for instance, somebody is right in your face

1062
01:14:59.240 --> 01:15:00.080
and they're,

1063
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:03.780
got a moment and you don't have time to like, okay, sorry, Hank,

1064
01:15:03.800 --> 01:15:08.380
can you hold the phone just a second? Okay. You know, so the

1065
01:15:08.380 --> 01:15:11.200
thing is that if you practice this, and if you strengthen this

1066
01:15:11.200 --> 01:15:14.420
muscle, you'll be able to very quickly shift into your

1067
01:15:14.420 --> 01:15:18.060
identity because you're familiar with telling yourself how to do

1068
01:15:18.060 --> 01:15:22.560
that. Your soul is very familiar with shifting into that place

1069
01:15:22.560 --> 01:15:25.800
without you having to walk through the whole process or the

1070
01:15:25.800 --> 01:15:29.760
whole whatever. You did that in order to familiarize yourself

1071
01:15:29.760 --> 01:15:32.880
with making a choice that you are who God says that you are to

1072
01:15:32.880 --> 01:15:36.560
have faith. So anyway, just FYI, it's better practiced, you know,

1073
01:15:36.560 --> 01:15:42.440
in order to strengthen it, then in that moment, then like, so

1074
01:15:42.440 --> 01:15:45.240
from that sense of identity, you won't feel threatened by what

1075
01:15:45.240 --> 01:15:49.000
the other person says anymore, then, because you're not

1076
01:15:49.000 --> 01:15:53.760
threatened, that will that from that place, again, you know, we

1077
01:15:53.760 --> 01:15:56.360
kind of have a theme going tonight, you know, from like,

1078
01:15:56.360 --> 01:15:59.760
what we were talking about with Diana, is you'll just very

1079
01:15:59.760 --> 01:16:05.400
naturally know what how to handle the situation. And it'll

1080
01:16:05.400 --> 01:16:07.800
kind of come a little bit more out of your being, it's a little

1081
01:16:07.800 --> 01:16:11.440
clearer to hear God a little meaning I was I was trying to,

1082
01:16:11.480 --> 01:16:16.040
like, you know, soften that, but it's a lot easier to hear the

1083
01:16:16.040 --> 01:16:20.440
Lord. And then it's a lot easier to kind of feel through in the

1084
01:16:20.440 --> 01:16:23.400
spirit, through the situation, right? Okay, how should I

1085
01:16:23.400 --> 01:16:26.440
respond? Because you're not threatened, when you feel

1086
01:16:26.440 --> 01:16:29.200
threatened, you're always going through your soul to try in your

1087
01:16:29.200 --> 01:16:33.320
mind to try to figure out, okay, wait, what what what, like tips

1088
01:16:33.320 --> 01:16:35.920
and tricks that I read about in that really cool book called no

1089
01:16:35.920 --> 01:16:38.960
boundaries by Dr. Henry McLeod, you know, what do you say to do,

1090
01:16:38.960 --> 01:16:41.440
you know, I'm not gonna put up with that, you know, and you're

1091
01:16:41.440 --> 01:16:45.400
trying to remember stuff. But if you just operate a bit more from

1092
01:16:45.440 --> 01:16:47.800
you know, but if you're operating more from your being,

1093
01:16:47.800 --> 01:16:50.440
then you're operating from the love of God and the love of God

1094
01:16:50.440 --> 01:16:54.080
knows a lot of things. The love of God knows that person's

1095
01:16:54.080 --> 01:16:56.520
background and how they're going to take certain phrasing, you

1096
01:16:56.520 --> 01:17:00.280
don't know that. But he does. So like, he'll guide you through

1097
01:17:00.280 --> 01:17:03.160
that. And you'll and because what they need to encounter is

1098
01:17:03.160 --> 01:17:05.360
they need to encounter God's love through you, that will

1099
01:17:05.360 --> 01:17:09.040
change the conversation, they literally will not be convinced

1100
01:17:09.040 --> 01:17:12.640
by you explaining your side of things, they just won't. Because

1101
01:17:12.640 --> 01:17:15.560
the reason why they're reacting is not based on logic, it's

1102
01:17:15.560 --> 01:17:18.640
based on how it emotionally impacted them. And that has

1103
01:17:18.640 --> 01:17:23.280
stuff to do with their background, and that moment, and

1104
01:17:23.600 --> 01:17:27.560
all kinds of stuff. So psychology can only get us so

1105
01:17:27.560 --> 01:17:31.920
far. So anyway, and that's what I would recommend, you know, and

1106
01:17:31.920 --> 01:17:35.120
then also seeing them once you see yourself as spirit, you're

1107
01:17:35.120 --> 01:17:38.040
like, Oh, I'm not threatened. It's easier to see them like

1108
01:17:38.040 --> 01:17:40.840
that, too. It's easier for them to see them with compassion,

1109
01:17:40.840 --> 01:17:43.880
etc, which will change how you talk to them. Because I always

1110
01:17:43.880 --> 01:17:46.880
recommend that you talk to someone in who it is, how it is

1111
01:17:46.880 --> 01:17:49.600
that you see them through God's eyes, and not through the

1112
01:17:49.600 --> 01:17:52.200
brokenness that they're expressing themselves at and

1113
01:17:52.200 --> 01:17:55.800
they're in the fearful soul and body that that they think that

1114
01:17:55.800 --> 01:17:59.720
they are identified as. And then so you're going to talk to them

1115
01:17:59.800 --> 01:18:03.160
kinder, you're going to be pouring, you know, heaps of coal

1116
01:18:03.160 --> 01:18:07.280
on their head, and on your enemy's head, you know, because

1117
01:18:07.560 --> 01:18:10.400
you don't have any reason to be threatened. So you're blessing

1118
01:18:10.400 --> 01:18:13.560
them. You know, in your words, you're loving on him, that'll

1119
01:18:13.560 --> 01:18:17.720
completely change everything. So like I was telling Rita, when

1120
01:18:17.720 --> 01:18:21.160
you talk about all this, it all sounds easy. I'm very aware that

1121
01:18:21.160 --> 01:18:24.840
it's very hard, I actually had to live it in order to learn it.

1122
01:18:25.120 --> 01:18:27.920
And then it took years in order for me to be able to have the

1123
01:18:27.960 --> 01:18:30.680
for the Lord to give me the words to be able to articulate

1124
01:18:30.680 --> 01:18:35.840
it. So I lived this before I understood it. So my point is

1125
01:18:35.840 --> 01:18:39.640
that it worked. And I began to live like that, because that's

1126
01:18:39.640 --> 01:18:43.520
how God was orchestrating me in the moment to be with the person

1127
01:18:43.520 --> 01:18:47.400
to love them through Christ. And then and then I was trying to

1128
01:18:47.400 --> 01:18:50.440
figure out, so what am I doing? And how am I doing this? And

1129
01:18:50.440 --> 01:18:52.320
then, you know, a few years later, the Lord began to

1130
01:18:52.320 --> 01:18:55.360
rebuild, this is this is what you were doing. And this is why

1131
01:18:55.360 --> 01:18:58.640
this is the theological background of how all of this

1132
01:18:58.640 --> 01:19:01.480
works. So I could explain it to other people. So this isn't a

1133
01:19:01.480 --> 01:19:05.680
theory. This is what I actually live and have lived, God finally

1134
01:19:05.680 --> 01:19:09.320
gave me words to explain how I'm doing it. So anyway, just to

1135
01:19:09.320 --> 01:19:11.760
give you encouragement, because it all sounds pie in the sky.

1136
01:19:11.760 --> 01:19:15.920
And it sounds Oh, isn't that wonderful? I mean, it's not a

1137
01:19:15.920 --> 01:19:18.640
concept. And it's not a theory. Of course, it's what I believe

1138
01:19:18.640 --> 01:19:20.520
is what I live. And you can choose what you want to do.

1139
01:19:23.160 --> 01:19:24.200
So is that helpful?

1140
01:19:25.560 --> 01:19:26.280
Yes.

1141
01:19:26.440 --> 01:19:29.320
Okay, there's always more we could talk about all that. But

1142
01:19:29.800 --> 01:19:34.920
that good for tonight? Yes. helpful enough. Good. All right,

1143
01:19:34.920 --> 01:19:38.320
let's get to see all of y'all. We'll get back on the road.

1144
01:19:38.760 --> 01:19:39.680
Yes.

1145
01:19:40.680 --> 01:19:41.080
Bye.

1146
01:19:42.440 --> 01:19:46.080
Thank you. Enjoy. Be careful. Bye bye. Thank you.

1147
01:19:46.880 --> 01:19:48.840
Talking to all my Texas peeps tonight.

1148
01:19:50.840 --> 01:19:51.360
Bye.