Sorry for how I look.
We are driving, and where are we we're right outside of Atlanta. And so the guys are stopped at some kind of place to put my phone where I don't have to hold it for an hour.
I don't know, I'm in the moving van I'm in the U-Haul.
I don't think I can do that so I might have to just.
Oh, there we go. Y'all can see me just fine this way I wanted to make sure y'all had some light on me so you could see who was talking.
But anyway, so the guys are in Chick-fil-a. I'm eating their food and enjoying getting to sit somewhere other than the car for, for a while.
Yeah, I grabbed Chick-fil-a, and I ordered it so it's gonna hold it for me and I'll have it afterwards so we, I think we got on the road it.
I think 230 something like that and so we have not made a single stop.
So anyway, drove straight through.
So good gas mileage.
So, how is it going.
Good.
Are you going to drive all night.
No, no, but the guys did say that they wanted to drive a bit further.
Because it's about 17 hours. You know, 16 and a half. No, no 17 Yes, but it depends on the time is whether or not it's 16 and a half or 17 and a half anyway it's around 17 average, and they wanted to get a bit further down the road so tomorrow wouldn't be as long.
So they said that they wanted to just stop for the hour that the rest group and then they wanted to push on a bit before we found a hotel to stop at so.
So, looks like Karen is not joining us tonight for a very good reason very excited to hear that she's getting to spend time with her husband.
And so in Diana may jump on in just a little bit but we didn't get to do rest group last week, or because it was in the middle of the Valentine's Night for so many and so it's been a couple of weeks I guess.
So I'll just hop off and y'all can just catch up and everything. And well I say that you know what I've done before is I do this, and with the, with the Norway group you know the international group is since it's just the two of them they didn't want
it's just the two of them they're like, well, you know, what did you purchase it was not that they didn't want to it's just that they're like well actually my goodness you know let's let's make this more fun let's have, let's have you on.
And so I think what I'll do is I'll pop off for a bit, and then I might pop on a bit earlier than maybe usual so if it's just a TV hopefully Diana they'll join us soon.
So, anyway, I'm here if you need anything.
Hey, I can't hear you.
Okay, I had to go with the old school headphones.
I can hear you.
To go first.
Yeah, I didn't, I didn't get to my videos.
Isaiah had the computer most of the weekend.
Hmm.
Um,
yeah.
I feel like Ashley.
I feel like Ashley just told me the same thing over and over but I have the same issue
about
I'll, I'll press into God and then I'll get uncomfortable and then I'll just stay back for a while and then I'll go back into go back to it but I really, you know, want it to be, you know, lifestyle change and not just, I'm having a crisis.
I did have this dream and it was interesting, you know, I wasn't sleeping this weekend.
And, and by the morning time, I was just exhausted. And so I decided to go back to bed.
And then I felt like I was leaning into him.
And
And then I was watching, then I was, I felt like I left my body and I was watching myself
this time.
Because before I was like keeping my eyes closed and not looking, um, but I wasn't home.
Like last time I was home anyways, but toward the end of it, it was, toward the end of it,
I got scared.
I was looking in the mirror and I didn't, they look like Thai women.
And I'm like, who are these women?
And I just automatically thought they were my, my aunts like that I've never met, but
then I started getting afraid.
So then I, then I woke up, but I feel like it's a part of me that I'm like the Lord's
revealing about, um, me avoiding parts of myself or just automatically thinking negatively
about things.
And, um, every time I come out of like a, uh, like a unhappy experience in my dream
or, you know, thoughts, well, mostly dreams, I'm like, I had an opportunity to trust the
Lord here when it's, you know, so I don't know, it was, it was good.
And then it didn't, then it didn't end up good.
So what was the, the good part was that you had the dream?
Is that what you're saying?
Yeah.
I felt like I was experiencing.
Oh yeah.
So, okay.
Now I should write it down.
But now that I remember, I was like, why was it good?
Um, so when I fell into him, I started flying, but I was only flying in my room.
So I was like, oh, I'm staying safe, you know?
And then, um, and then there was this little child and somebody else was caring for her
and I wasn't, and I was just like, oh, how adorable.
And I was like, Lord, I don't want a child, but this thing's adorable.
So if you're going to give this thing to me, sure.
So, um, yeah, it was just kind of spotty after that, but, and then I, you know, I don't know
why I ended up looking in the mirror and it was my bathroom mirror and I just saw, um,
other people in it.
The other people were your aunts?
Yes.
Um, I'm guessing that's who they were, cause that's what I felt like.
That's who they were.
Yeah.
So, yeah, other than that, just trying to enjoy life, even though it's boring right
now.
Yeah.
So how about you, how's your week been?
Well, I had a question first, friend, um, you said something about how you, you said
you'll feel like you get close to God and then you say, you, you, did you say you get,
you said, you said afraid or confused or something?
What did you say?
Um, I don't know if I get comfortable or get, um,
Oh yeah.
You said uncomfortable.
Yeah.
No.
And then I get uncomfortable, like about returning, if that makes sense.
So, um, I'm like, oh, it didn't work.
And then I'll just kind of get discouraged and stop for a while.
So the uncomfortable is from your feeling like you try to meet him there, but it doesn't
meet your expectations or what you think.
Yes.
Yeah.
And then I guess I'm not experiencing anything or, um, I have feelings that I don't process
and I start going into my old habits.
Like when I know I'm like watching TV a lot or when I know I'm like, um, you know, going
through my phone or, you know, doing other things, just busy, staying busy instead of
just going and processing, um, my feelings when things come up, I'm like, oh, I kind
of like, okay.
So somebody at work did something, I mean, this is just one example, uh, and I'm like,
and I felt threatened and I was upset.
I'm like, you could have just addressed me and not my boss, like if it's something I
can learn from.
But then the, just the way they came at me in the meeting was just like, well, kind of
like, why did you do this?
instead of, I don't know, I just felt like, okay, I made a mistake, but the way they explained
to me wasn't, wasn't like a teachable moment. It was more like condemning, like, yeah. And
I try to just brush it off and it just keeps popping back in my mind or wakes me up. So
I definitely haven't processed it, or I did try to process it. Finally, I think when I
started to have that experience, that dream. Oh, hey, Dana. Yeah. So I think, yeah, actually,
maybe that's what did happen when I was like, finally, like trying to go through the and
process it with him. Because I was like, well, this thing's keep keeping me up. So I finally
did that. And I did have an experience. So that was good. Now that I think about it,
like, yeah, I need a journal more. What's happening? Keep track of it. You know, I think
my old way of saying things are like, oh, it's either not their attention, or I shouldn't
care that much that they try to throw me in the bus, or it felt like they're trying to
throw me in the bus. Instead of teaching me like, what other steps I could have done to
like, process. I know, completing the next step in the work. It really wasn't mine to
do. But yeah, just to learn something. But it doesn't feel good still.
Yeah.
I understand.
I think that's a good question. We can ask Ashley, though, about the whole work stuff,
you know? Yeah, that's a good idea.
That's a question I have to because I'm like, okay, well, I don't really deal with the,
like, I, I've cordoned myself off from drama, except for myself. I don't have people drama
because I'm like, so, but you know, when I step back into that, then yeah, I feel you.
That's good. Well, thank you for sharing, Rita.
Being vulnerable. Hi, Diana.
How's it going?
Good. How are you?
Good. How are y'all doing? Can y'all hear me?
Mm hmm. Yes.
I have my work headphones. I use these for work.
Your hair is dark, so it kind of blends. You can't even really tell.
Voluminous hair right here.
Would you like to go next, Diana? We're just sharing our journey, our journey shares.
Oh gosh, it's been this hard. It's been hard for me. I don't know about you guys, but maybe Rita's
a pro, but I, I'm, I'm, I struggle with the, just with the doing like I'm a natural born hustler,
you know, like I just like to do, you know, and I just need to learn how to be still.
Yeah. So I've just been struggling in that part just to be still and to know what is the soul
and what is of the spirit? Like, when is it me? When is it God? Like, am I, you know, learning that part?
Yeah, that's a good question. We can get more questions for Ashley when she gets back.
Yeah. Yeah. Cause she said, she said, when you go into rest that you wanted to be, to get to the
place where you're doing things out of the spirit versus the soul. And I'm thinking, you know, what
makes you get to that place where you're now just, it's coming out of the spirit and not the soul.
Like, I like I've done the tools and all of that. I just don't know if, I'm not sure. I'm sure it's
like a daily, I'm thinking it's a daily thing that you have to walk out with God.
And yeah. Maybe, you know, Rita, you're the pro. You're the, you're the, you're the
the senior person here.
I think what Ashley said was that you kind of choose that it
is God. And then he'll teach you as you know, or he may correct
you and guide you but he loves that you sought him and we're
choosing him.
That's good.
That's a thumbs up.
I knew she would know.
That's a good question. Diana. I, I needed to hear that. That
question and answer.
How about you tell me?
Oh, well, I had a follow up question. So like, specifically,
like, what could you speak to if you feel comfortable? Like,
what are the things that you're referring to is kind of like, I
guess, making decisions or feeling like, Oh, am I operating
out of my soul? Like in what area? Or what? What's the thing,
you know,
just like the daily thing of just, you know, well, you know,
good example is, I'll just put something out there, you know,
my son just turned 18. And so I've just been, you know, just
asking God to give me peace. And, you know, to help me lay it
down to where, now that he's 18. And he's telling me, Mom, you
know, like, I want to do this, I want to do that, I want to do
that. And now all of a sudden, I'm having to step back a little
bit. And, you know, not be so, you know, nobody tells you that
part when your kids turn 18, that all of a sudden, I remember
being there, when you just you now you want to do your own
thing, right. But just just just as an example, you know,
saying God, when do I have to step back? And when do I have to
step in? When is it me trying to be controlling mom? And when is
it like, just in that it just in that kind of thing, I'm just
saying, you know, I want to make sure that what I do is just, you
know, and coming out of, you know, it's just not me that, you
know, but I I've been praying and, and I know, God has given
me strength to kind of let go and step back a little bit. And
I know it's him, because I only have one son, only one child. So
it's like, he's, he's given me the strength, and he's helped me
and he's kind of said, you know, you've, you've got to, you know,
you're gonna have to let go, you know. So, but just as an
example, I'm just saying in that way, you know, I know,
prayer helps, right? Because prayer, you know, we go to God
with whatever we have. And of course, that helps.
Yeah. Well, I just want to say, I'm sorry, I know that can be
really emotional. It's your baby.
Oh, my gosh, it is. And it's given me flashbacks of when I
was that age. And I was like, Oh, my God. But yeah, so do you
have any kids? No, you want to? You want to know that now? I'm
not capable anymore. I had a surgery in April, but I'm fine
with it. Because I'm like, my story's different. And I was an
educator for like 20 years. So I feel like I've raised quite a
few. So I had my skin did what kind of surgery did you have?
fibroids removed. And so as a result, I had to get a
hysterectomy. Yeah, a partial or whole?
They left ovary.
Okay, exactly like me. Oh, yeah, I had a hysterectomy. I have one
ovary as well. So that's why I only have one because I had also
fibro tumors, fibro tumors, I had endometriosis. And I even
had, I even had the tumors in like on my liver. They had to
while they had to remove like, I mean, just so I've had them, I
had them everywhere. And I had to fibroid surgeries. I didn't I
didn't know if I was even going to have Samuel because they had
told me that. I don't know, you know, because you have all of
this going on. And my doctor said, you know, I don't know if
you're going to be able to and well, he's a miracle of God. But
but no, I totally get you. And that is so painful, though. Don't
you feel much better now having had had the surgery? Girl? I
literally my stomach it was like I had I was having a child went
in the hay ain't got nobody's name to show for it got a scar
for it. But it was I was so glad to have that out.
It was just like, oh, I can't even.
Yeah, I just feel like sometimes it's kind of like,
you feel like, I don't know, this is right,
but it was just like stress
and all of this stuff carrying it.
You know what I mean?
Like, I just feel like sometimes
it manifests in your body, you know?
Yes.
But even to my sister and my mother,
it had run in the family.
And so it's all good.
I'm just happy that I wasn't like heartbroken.
Like, I can't have kids.
I'm happy that I just had come to a place a long time ago.
Like, I got married in my 40s.
So I just kind of already was kind of like, you know.
Made peace with it.
I made peace with it.
Like, well, I'm not having a baby.
And you know what?
I'm not, I am not, you know, I am not,
I'm just talking about my journey.
You know, I love my son, but you know what?
It is hard.
I mean, it is hard having to, I only have one,
but I don't have people to do with all the children.
Me either.
Oh Lord.
Mamas are the best people in the world.
I'll just be like, girl, that's your full-time job.
Then you got another job.
Like, mamas are everything.
You sacrificed your body.
Sorry.
Anyway, but girl, yeah, I feel you.
So, you know, I don't have any babies.
I get to spoil my niece and nephew though.
Yeah, that's good.
That's good.
You know, but, oh yeah.
I remember I had the surgery.
I was like, woo, thank you, Jesus.
Thank you, Jesus.
When did I do this before?
I was like, woo.
Yeah.
So, okay.
For me, I guess I can share,
cause I was supposed to do, like, I was like,
oh, I'm going to do a journey share,
like post it or whatever,
but I haven't gotten around to that.
So I guess I'll share a praise report here
and maybe something I'm struggling with.
Let's see.
Oh yeah.
So I know, I listened to one of,
I think it was Annette's journey share
about how she wasn't necessarily in the job
that she wanted to be.
She's just like, I love how she phrased it.
She had this inner deep knowing
that there was more for her.
And, but you know, like,
and that really, really resonated with me.
And I thought back about, like,
the accusations that I had against God.
And it was really like, I was,
and I thought I didn't have any.
I remember I told, it was Karen.
I was like, well,
I don't think I have any accusations against God,
but it turns out I did.
So it was just like a word of knowledge
that I had before that I just really was,
you know, holding fast to.
I have a friend,
she gets to live an amazing lifestyle
with her and her husband.
And I'm like, I've always been like,
if God can do it for them, they can do it for me.
He's not a respecter of persons.
You know what I mean?
But I just really had stepped out on faith
thinking like, okay, well, this is the, you know, like,
okay, I paid all my debt off.
You know, I come from surgery in April
and I had enough time.
I took off to the end of my, you know,
for the rest of the school year, essentially.
And then I just was like, God, well, how do I,
how do I not go back?
Like, how do I have this like peaceful life
where I'm not stressed out?
You know what I mean?
Like constantly.
And I felt like he said, well, you can sell your house to him.
And so I was like, okay, nothing but a word.
Like, I mean, I just got to the point
where I just was like, I mean, it's just things, it's stuff.
And then it gets to a point where it owns you,
you don't even own it.
You know what I'm saying?
So I'm just like, I just had been like,
release, hey, that's fine.
Like, I have all, I have this stuff,
but like, I don't have the life I want to live.
I'm working 24 seven.
And so anyway, back to my accusation against God,
I just was like, well, God,
I just stepped out on faith and did this.
And like a lot of the things that were going
through my mind was, it was a lot of self-doubt.
Like afterwards, like eight, 10 months in, you know,
I thought that like, well, I had a word of knowledge
just about like, I was going to be able to have
multiple businesses, that money would never be a concern.
And so I was like, okay, well, I stepped out on faith
and money isn't a concern and okay.
But I just was like, so just used to like doing,
well, I got to bring an income.
I got to bring an income.
But I was like, I just was like, you know what?
I expected it to work a certain way.
And I was trying to force fit things
that I didn't even ask God about.
And I just realized that, you know what?
Like I do, I still believe his word is going to come true.
Like I know his word doesn't come back void.
So I stand with that.
But I realized that I was trying to put God in a box
and trying to say, well, it needed to come this way.
And then I was stressing myself out
and had like major anxiety and just like, you know,
it's just the whole cycles of doing too much
and then not doing anything because you're depressed
because doing too much like wore you out.
And it was just all of this.
And then just the self-doubt.
Oh, did I make the right decision?
And then when I, I guess a week,
oh, it's been about a week or two ago,
when I went to my friend's house and had the dream
and all that stuff, like, it just, I just really,
and I just started journaling, like journaling,
like dying, like you and, wait, Karen.
Karen said, just like my raw emotions,
just like, why'd you even put me here?
Like, this life is stupid.
Like, did I make mistakes?
Like, it was just like raw,
cause like, I was in a deep depression.
I really was.
And like, my friend had prayed me out,
but I knew that I couldn't keep going back there.
I needed to do something different
and just putting it all out there.
Like, did I make the wrong decision?
Like you said, X, Y, Z, but like, it didn't happen that way.
And I just, God has just been so faithful.
Like, I'll just pray that.
And I'll just see him, he'll just take it away.
Like, like all of those emotions that I felt,
I just feel like they just start, like they evaporate.
Like, I literally gave it to him
and left it at the cross, so to speak.
I gave it to him.
And it's like, now they don't weigh me down.
Like, I'm just like, I'm like, I'm free flowing.
I'm yours, Lord, you've already provided.
Now, why am I worrying about tomorrow?
You know what I mean?
Like, you dress the flowers in the field.
You know, like, why do I need to worry?
You know, you are El Shaddai, the God of more than enough.
And so I know he's going to,
I know there are steps that, yeah, I need to take,
but I'm just like,
I'm not gonna stress myself out about tomorrow.
And I feel like I'm wise in what the resources that I have.
And I'm not gonna stress myself out.
Like, I know he'll show me the next step.
And it's really been great because all of the curiosities
and like, just talents or things that I wanted to explore,
that I felt like, well,
I didn't even know I wanted to explore
because I was just so consumed with work all the time
that that's all I thought about was work, you know,
and the next thing.
So like, he's just kind of opening up paths
and just reminding me of things that I have interest in
and love and giving me ideas and things like that.
So that has been a major blessing.
I guess I want to just share just kind of like
the specifics about an accusation against God
and how he kind of just really like
has been stepping in with me and on my behalf,
just to kind of give me peace and just be at rest.
And so it's just been a really wonderful walk
since I decided to start giving every little tidbit to him
from when am I going to Mardi Gras with my husband?
What am I gonna wear?
Oh my God, I need some outfits
to like drama and stress about that.
And like obsessing in my sleep to like,
Lord, Lord, help me pack this bag, like get it together.
Now I'm like, oh, my outfits are fire.
Okay, so it's like from big things
to little, little things, you know what I mean?
So they really don't matter in the long run.
But he's faithful, he knows the hairs I have,
how many hairs I have on my head.
So he's just as concerned about me thinking that I'm cute
when I walk out the door.
So that's just one thing.
I'll share my other stuff in my video journey share, so.
Oh, it has been a real breakthrough for me.
Where, by the way, I love your, just your testimony
and what God is doing in you.
I saw your journey share where you spoke about the,
about your dream and how you felt.
And I mean, it's just amazing just how the dreams can just,
I mean, how God speaks to you.
I don't know about you, but I dream too.
And it's just amazing how he can literally show you
what you're going through
or what you're going to go through either way.
But it's just like, it's just awesome.
And I could, I mean, I could just see that in you.
And even when you were doing your journey share
and speaking about the dream, I mean, I was just like, wow.
And she's, you could see the, you know,
that breakthrough in you and that, and what God is doing.
So that's awesome.
That's awesome.
Thank you.
And you know, the, I was going to say that
what Ashley had said, when I saw her,
one of the videos she put on there,
it was so freeing that she said just like,
it's okay to be where you're at.
Cause you know that, especially social media
and everybody tells you, no, you gotta be here
or you gotta be there.
Or you just feel like you're behind
or you're not where you need to be
or you're not as successful as you're supposed to be
or your goals or you have, you know,
that's okay to be where you're at.
Like I, that was just.
Oh, thank you, Lord.
And that is just so it was just like, OK, I don't if I'm five,
I'm going to be five.
I think she said that if you're five, you're going to be five.
If you're 10, be 10, whatever it is, just be that.
And because you might miss something
that God's trying to show you because you want to get ahead.
And that has been me all my life, I feel like I've always
just wanted to get ahead and not be where I'm at.
I remember being young and wanting to be older.
And no matter what, I was always wanting to be older, you know.
And it's just like, no, no, I need to be where I'm at, you know.
And I ask God, show me how to be, how to be OK where I'm at,
you know, help me to be where I'm at and learn what I need to learn
because I don't want to go around the mountain, go around,
you know, and keep going.
So it's it's just that I love that when she said that in the video,
I was just like, wow.
And I remind myself every day, it's OK to be where I'm at.
You know, of course, I'm going to stay here, but.
And there's a reason why.
So, yeah, yeah, I so agree, because we don't get to
look, we don't enjoy life so much because we're so worried
about the next thing, you know, like it's just like,
but like take a moment and just be, you know, it's not even like,
oh, be grateful, it's just like
just be here because that's where they I feel that's where
the anxiety comes from.
OK, where's the next move? What is it?
You know, and it's just like, oh, my God, is nonstop, you know.
So just learning how to be in the moment and just like it's OK.
Just going to enjoy.
And there's always something there's always going to be something that that,
you know, wherever, whether it be in your midst, in your job,
whether it be in your personal life, there will always be somebody
or something telling you you need to be somewhere else.
And so it's just a good, you know, to me, that's rest.
Rest is being free from other people's opinion.
I've I've needed that rest for a long time.
So I've just been telling myself, you know.
Yeah. And expectations.
I was like a Mardi Gras today.
And it was this gentleman, I think he was an attorney,
does commercial real estate or whatever or something like that, whatever.
And then he was talking to my husband, who's an attorney.
And he was like, oh, and he talked to me.
He was just like, oh, are you an attorney?
So I was like, no.
You know, before I would I would have been like, oh, no, I'm an educator.
I went to school.
No, I don't care, girl.
I've got you, child. That's my identity.
And nothing else matters.
It don't matter. It don't matter if I own a home.
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I don't care.
I'm Tammy and I'm loved by God.
That's all you need to know, because that's really all it comes down to.
But anyway, I feel you.
I'm like, it's 832.
Yeah. Well.
Oh, my word, it's 832.
I feel like I could keep talking, but that's not what we're here for.
No, you it is.
That is great.
If you have something else before I jump in, go for it.
Did you have anything?
Does anyone have anything?
No, everyone good.
I love hearing everybody's
everybody's discussion and just where everybody is.
I love it.
So I also heard some questions, but I didn't really try to remember them.
It's like, OK, I need to be paying attention to the rest of the conversation
and I can't having my mind and being trying to remember other things
and that I'm not paying attention.
So did anyone have any questions or anything they wanted to bring up?
Or I don't know.
Or is everyone good?
Did y'all solve it in the meantime?
Shin, I was just wondering,
and I don't even know how to how to phrase it, but but
how do you get to where you're
operating out of your spirit, not your soul, without striving?
Because in my religious minds, X mindset,
I, you know, it was fasting and doing this and doing that and doing that.
And then to because if I wasn't doing those things, I wasn't,
you know, of course, nothing could come out of my spirit
because I had to be had to do all those things.
You're working, which are not bad things, you know, but
but how on my daily I'm trying.
operate out of my spirit. Like what, I don't know how to stop
doing everything, but still do that. Like I, I feel like in my
mind, it's something saying, you know, no, you, you've got to do
all things, you know, you've got to. I don't know if I make
sense.
Oh, yeah, no, absolutely. So it's actually, um, it's why I
talk about the importance of, because you want to operate more
out of your, not to sound cliche-ish, but you're wanting
to operate more out of being, because of who it is that you
are, not because, oh, I'm doing this, or I haven't been doing
this. But rather, no, this is who I am, this feels natural.
It's, it's a, I don't know, just a natural expression of who I am
and what I'm kind of like feeling right now, etc. And but
the thing is, we all kind of wonder, yeah, but how do I get
to that place and stop the doing? And then how do I know
it's me and not it's God and not me? And part of the thing is to
know that there's nothing wrong with it being you, what it is
that we want to, but the only way that it is okay, for it to
be you, so to speak, is if it's not out of your flesh that
believes that acting out of fear in separation from God, as
opposed to, it is okay for it to be out of your soul, as long as
you know, it's, you know, which, of course, you call it flesh,
but it's not really your flesh aspect of your soul, it's an
aspect of your soul that's in alignment with your spirit,
that's an agreement with your spirit that's in faith in what
God has said. And then that aspect of you, now that your
soul is aligned in that particular area in that
particular moment, okay, who is, who is you? Who are you?
And I was I was purposefully incorrect in my grammar there.
Who are you? You know, what is your soul? What is your unique,
unique expression, but it can, but it needs to be out of a
place where, like I said, you're, you're in faith with
God, you are, you're operating out of your understanding of
your true identity, that it's from your union with the Lord,
that you're unconditionally love, you're unconditionally
accepted, that you're not, that you're not separated, that
there's nothing to fear, that he's provider, he's protector,
and that, that that is not being threatened and can't be, then
that being that person, that is complete is completely taken
care of and has no worries or cares. What would that person
do? Meaning not what is in theory? No, when you can, what
does that person do? So who are you really? And the only way to
do that, for it to not be theory, is for you to truly
choose that God does love you to the extent that he does, that
you are who he says that you are, and that you're unified
with him, and you're not threatened to be able to be
separated, even by your own sin. Because neither death nor life,
your angels nor principalities, you know, nor heaven or earth,
you know, and all that stuff can separate us from the love of
the Lord. So that's why I talk so much about God's love, about
the fact that we're unified with him, why I've been encouraging
all to focus on delighting in yourself, and choosing yourself,
and whatever is to kind of get back to that place of, of being
without me having to, without me saying it, because we're so used
to hearing, which is why I really don't talk about the
whole doing, being versus doing because it's so cliche-ish,
people just kind of like gloss over it. If I say it, I'm like,
because we even the non, even the non believers talk about
that don't don't do, you know, be. And so we've heard it so
much that it has lost a lot of its impact and meaning. And we
all have a lot of other meanings associated with it. And so but
it is that it is that same idea. It's just focusing on being but
what is that? How do you get to that? How do you get to that
place, where you're, you're connected truly with who it is
that you really are, we become very disconnected, we have a
tendency to believe that we're inherently evil. And we're
constantly trying to either view ourselves as the enemy or to
distance ourselves from ourselves. We don't trust
ourselves. And so we're not really connected with and in
tune with who we really are, what we really feel, and what we
would really do or say, if we felt completely safe, if we felt
that God truly was providing for us truly was taking care of us
and all of that. And so anyway, that's why I recommend
And doing the things that I've been talking about, you know, choose to do those exercises where you are receiving the Lord's love where you're at, because that helps connect you experientially with just receiving God's love.
Without you working for it, because God is actually you're actually experiencing that with him.
you're actually experiencing not doing anything and be being overwhelmed undeservedly is how we feel.
You know undeservedly by his love, and so you realize oh my word it's it's that big into that extent, so when we experience it with God when we experience it from the Spirit of God.
It impacts us in a way that nothing and can take away from us, so if you just hear me talking about it, it sounds great in concept, but you're always going to have to remind yourself that it's true.
And you're always going to be trying to just convince yourself, because all it is is knowledge.
it's not an actual experience that you've had with the Lord so that's why I recommend doing that that exercise that love exercise with the Lord.
You know, where you ask Jesus you close your eyes and ask Jesus to come ask him to appear in the room and then just and just sit there and and just experience being loved by him and then it's also why I talk about.
The importance of choosing that we are unified with him to such a degree that your very identity is your union with him it's not just your spirit it's the that's it's the point at which your spirits unified with God spirit.
it's that that that point is is is your action is actually who you are so when you're expressing yourself into life.
which really is going to go into the rest of eternity as well, but we'll just be very simple right now and just talk about you know this this earthly experience.
it's expressing into the physical what you and the Lord's relationship, in other words, your union looks like in the spiritual because it's going to be very unique and it is from for me or for Tammy or reader Karen or.
or Renata or Annette it's going to look very different for all of us, because each of us has just a unique.
is uniquely united with the Lord and therefore has a unique expression so God with each one of us shows that very individually.
So anyway, so who is that what is, who are you, you are that place of it, which you are unified with God.
And you have to release all of the doing and completely just in just be absorbed into shifted into to into.
Choosing that place of union and how do you do that you have to choose that God is safe enough to be unified with.
In order to be safe enough to like in for for you to for in order for it to be safe enough for you to choose that that really is true, because otherwise we keep trying to distance ourselves from it because it's just too hard we don't want to connect with ourselves that much, let alone connect with God.
We definitely don't trust ourselves, let alone the Lord, and so he wants us to overcome that by having faith in the fact that simply he said.
Even though we've got no proof and we don't believe it we don't feel it, but he said, so we have to choose that so that really helps it helps.
That helps you begin to operate more out of your spirit than out of the flesh by doing those things because you're connecting with who you are.
And then you operate from that place so who and I, who are God and I together in the spirit.
That is how we're going to express ourself into the physical world that's how we're going to interact with our son that's how we're going to you know, build a business that's how we're going to.
make decisions in how we handle particular relationship issues.
it's who are God and I together, who is my father because i'm very intimately united with them, so who is my father and therefore who does he show me that I am.
And how does he mature me in expressing that in expressing the love the peace, the joy that you know the everything else that he says that he is.
The protector and the provider, we are that for our kingdom as well, we are that for our for the creation that we're given dominion over just like our father is over his kingdom, which is us.
Right so anyway, so we learn more about who he is and then we think and then and then he reveals to us who it is that who it is that he is and then who it is that we are.
And then what does that person who is that loving that he's been revealing to us that we are that that at peace that has that much joy that is that much patience.
What did what kind of decisions does that person make not in theory i'm saying you have to connect.
with who you really are, and then just, and then it'll naturally flow out. You'll, that's why in
rest, you can hear the Lord more clearly, you know, because there's just nothing getting in
the way of you trying to figure anything out. You're so, you're, you're operating more out of
just your existence, your naturalness, the being, because remember you're the balloon.
So it's very natural to be the balloon. It's very natural to just be who you are. So you have to
connect to that, which is choosing that you're unconditionally loved, accepted, and that,
you know, you're unified with him and can't be threatened to be separated. And then, and the way
that you do that, which is why I've been talking about the whole, you know, be enough for yourself.
One of the ways that you can, can start to get over the hurdles that we find of connecting with
that love and that union is choose that you're enjoyable. Start delighting in yourself. And then
sometimes any gaps that there are between us being able to believe God that he loves us
unconditionally, accepts us unconditionally that we're unified with him, that he's safe.
All of that is to actually start is it's kind of like a lower rung on the ladder that it's easier
to grab ahold of is I tell people, okay, enjoy yourself, delight in yourself. Think of the things
that you really enjoy, start doing those and enjoy yourself while you're doing it, really connect,
be in the present moment with it and delight, not just in what you're doing, but in the, in yourself
enjoying it. And you'll find that that'll be the greatest delight is how you feel is how you feel
that you in your natural state without trying are just, are just loving what it is that you're doing.
And so therefore that is connecting with your actual being with who you really are very naturally
and how you and the Lord are naturally expressing yourself. Like I've told y'all before for me,
it's with it. One of my things is with sewing. I love it. I even think it's surprising. I think
it's a little, I don't know. I don't want to say odd, but I think it's very surprising, but I do.
I absolutely love it. I do not understand why.
What do you sew?
Well, I do that. And I do, I do, I do quilting and stuff like that. And I quilt by hand.
And then so, and then I do, I do a really serious knitter,
very serious. I make sweaters and stuff like that. And, and so, but, and, and I love knitting
and that's one of my absolute hands-on favorite things to do. I do that more than sewing. However,
sewing makes me feel like, I don't know. I heard one time on a, on a show that it's
like a box of firecrackers has exploded inside me, you know, so excited. And so
there's an aspect in which I feel very close to myself when I, when I, when I do some,
when I do certain things that I just naturally really enjoy. And so, so stuff like that are,
are like tools and practical things that we can do that can help us start to make those
connections. If we're finding it too difficult to, to bridge the gap and choose that he loves
us as unconditionally as he says that he does, you know, et cetera. Those are some things that
we can do. Does that help answer your question? Yes, yes, it does. And I just, I need to be
just to be patient and be in my process. I need to be in my process and, and just, you know,
you say it's funny with the sewing. Back in a few months ago, I went to Amish country in Ohio.
And I couldn't, so many Amish people and I couldn't stop staring at their stitching,
at their clothes. I mean, it's just so amazing at the stitching. I don't know if you've ever seen
them actually, cause they sew all their, they make all their clothes and, and you're just,
it's really, really amazing at how, but yeah, I love to sew too. I'm going to, I'm just getting
back into it. So fun. Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. So I don't know what it would be. I don't know
if it would be the sewing, if it'd be something else, you know, you can just do those things.
And, and then also choose that when you're doing the, the normal boring things, because that's
the majority of the things that I, that I was doing, that I was teaching myself to delight in
myself was I was doing the boring things. I was washing the dishes. I was making breakfast. I
was taking a shower. It was in the normal everyday life that, that I just had to choose. Okay,
Ashley, what does God say? I had to choose him.
over my circumstances and my natural response to my circumstances, so it helps me, but I was able
to do that, but then there are other, but some people, if they can't, or if you're just having
a particularly challenging day, you choose something that's a bit easier, you choose
something you really enjoy, you know, as opposed to a natural, you know, chore that we do, you know,
or whatever, and in order to connect with who actually am I, anyway, and then you can begin
to operate a bit more out of your being, but remember, and you had talked about this, so this
is great, so you already have it on your mind, just remember that it's okay to be wherever it
is that you are, the reason that I say that is, you know, you had mentioned, oh, well, sometimes
it just takes time, that's that, and so I just wanted to affirm, yeah, that's absolutely true,
the more that you just allow yourself to be where you are and you don't judge yourself,
the more that you quickly, that you connect with your actual being, so, because you're actually
allowing who it is that you are to show up and to express itself without fear of being condemned
and shut down, so, and I think it was, I think it was Tammy I was talking to about this, you know,
in like one of the fireside chats or one of the other rest groups, it's probably a fireside chat,
I was encouraging her because she was talking about, oh, what was it, was it, oh, it was the
positive stuff, I was, you know, because she was practicing like, okay, what are the things that,
you know, are really enjoying, that really I delight in, and then I just, it just came to
my mind because she wasn't talking about like the negative things, but I was like,
I just popped it in my mind, so I just said, okay, and just FYI, you know, delight,
remember to delight in yourself and not get discouraged when you don't have the good emotions,
so not just that, oh, this feels wonderful, oh my goodness, I just feel like I just,
lighting, lighting up inside and I just love doing this or doing something neutral like doing the
dishes or whatever, like, like even the negative things, like, okay, I really don't, I'm mad right
now or I am scared or I am whatever, you know, in, take the opportunity to choose yourself in
those moments so that yourself knows that no matter what it can throw at you, that you really
are a safe place for it, that you really can be the parent that loves it unconditionally,
so, and I could be totally wrong, Rita, but when you talked about your dream earlier,
that's something I was thinking of, you said you had a dream about a kid, it could be, I mean,
who knows what that thing is, but as soon as it, and so you can ask the Lord, but as soon, and I
have a lot of dreams about, about children and babies and the fact that other people are taking
care of them and in the dream, I keep going back and forth about should I, you know, should I take
the child, you know, should I take responsibility of this child, even though it's not mine, you know,
should I take responsibility, and then there are other times where I've taken responsibility of a
child and for whatever reason, I give that responsibility away, I mean, none of these
children are children that I've birthed in these dreams, these are all children that I don't know,
they're like orphans or they're like, I don't know, they're whatever, I suddenly find myself
with this baby and feel responsible, but I find that in the dreams, someone else ends up always
kind of being responsible, either it starts out that way, and I'm kind of wondering if I should
take the responsibility because it's being offered to me, or I give it away, and then I wonder if I
should take it back, and so I don't know fully what yours is, but it's possible that it's you,
do you want to take, do you like, you're a precious thing, do you want to parent yourself,
you're like, say for instance, if you were a child, like not if you were, but what I mean is like way
back when you were a child, would you want you now, like you being an adult, would you take that
little girl on, of course you would, we all would, you know, because we, at the root of it, we all
love our little girl selves that was hurt, and that was scared, and we being the parent, and we
being older now, we look back and we're like, oh my word, I know so much more than now, I know that
they got onto themselves about things that weren't their fault, they took on responsibility that
wasn't theirs, we're like, I'm sorry you didn't feel loved in x, y, and z situation, or maybe
you like for your whole childhood, or whatever everyone's situations might be, you'd want to
fix that, you're like, I will take you on, I will fix that, I will make sure you feel loved, I will
make sure I give you what it is that you need, so it's possible, maybe not, you can just ask the
Lord, but it's possible that the Lord was telling you, you know, giving you an opportunity, hey this is
precious little girl, do you want you? Do you want to take on the responsibility of fully loving
yourself? You know, fully, you know, taking care of you. So anyway, but I was, I just threw that
in there because I remember that dream that you had. But, but yeah, so I would just encourage
you all again to just really, to be intentional about enjoying yourself and delighting in you.
You may not like the fact that you feel the way that you do, like, oh, I'm feeling mad or I'm
feeling whatever you may feel. I mean, none of us like that feeling. That's what we're talking
about. We're talking about unconditional love and acceptance that choose to delight in the
essence of who you are instead of rejecting you because you feel a particular way. I noticed
that my feelings, I even did this yesterday. In fact, it was almost exactly 24 hours from this
moment that I was having a very, very, very difficult time about something that I ran into.
And I am telling you what I was just sitting there and I was like, oh my goodness, this feeling
is absolutely horrible. And I thought, okay, actually just, just accept yourself feeling this
way. I wasn't accepting the feeling. I wasn't glorifying it. I wasn't saying it was godly.
I just, just, I was accepting me and I felt like that. I'm like, okay, this is how I feel.
And immediately the intensity went away immediately. And this was no little deal,
by the way. And immediately, I mean, my little girl woundings were majorly,
majorly triggered, majorly. And I just like, okay, this is how I feel right now. And I am
telling you what that weight dropped like that. It was so fast. It's like, okay, I'm over it.
I'm serious. It's really weird because you're, you're dropping the resistance. The resistance
is what makes everything that much harder. So everything just becomes so much easier if we
stop resisting. So that was something I was thinking of, you know, again, coming full
circle again, Diana, about what we were talking about, that the less that you, the more that you
accept yourself for where it is that you are, the faster you'll move through the process.
And, and you'll shift from the doing into the being, you'll shift from the, from the flesh
into the spirit. And you just kind of let it all happen and not resist the negative things when
they come up, looking at it and going, see, this proves to me I'm not as far as long as I hoped I
was, because, you know, I haven't had an instance for the past 10 days. And all of a sudden I had
one, you know, and, and to start seeing it as like this land, this indicator of, oh, I'm not
don't in any way, take, take things that happen as being any indication of you whatsoever, because
you're not, you're feeling, you're not what you're feeling. You are not what you are not believing
about God. Cause remember you were, you're in you, the identity is seated in your spirit and it's,
and it's fine. It has, it's, it's already achieved everything. It's, it's already perfect.
It's got nowhere higher to be. It's 100% one with the Lord. You know, it's just your soul and your
body that we can all, we can all find compassion for that part of ourselves because it's afraid.
It thinks that God really isn't that good, that he really isn't as good as he really is.
So in other words, it has nothing but good things to learn. There's no bad things to learn.
There's no, there's no shoe in the truth of what God created that we're waiting to drop.
In other words, there's no real shoe that will drop. There's no real negative. That's worse
than what we thought or worse than what we got. It's all better. So we can just have compassion
that our soul and our body thinks that this is as good as it gets. And that it really is this
hard. And then if we're don't work very vigilantly, it's just going to be harder.
None of that is true. None. So anyway, is that helpful? I give a lot there gave a lot of context.
We went on a few muddy trails. Thank you. You're welcome. So does anything,
does anyone have anything else before we, before we jump off?
Real quick. You friends are hilarious. I was going to ask him for her if she did. Okay.
Oh, I was going to bring up the little baby again. So I'm
understand. Yeah, I don't. Yeah, usually it's not my child.
It's Yeah, so I understand the child thing. So I am supposed to
parent myself. Is that what you're saying? And accept
myself?
Yeah, so I don't know if that's what the dream means. But when I
heard you telling Tammy about it, I was like, that was the
first thing that popped into my head was that kind of like we
all we all talk about having an inner child. There's an ad and
then so sometimes it's part of like an inner healing process.
And it is helpful to imagine going back to that little child
like inside of us not like way back then. But like they'll like
a psychologist or whatever counselor will say, hey, you
know, imagine the scene again, and then go and talk to your
little self or whatever, you know, and it sounds really
hokey, but I'm telling you what it really works. And so because
it's just it's a it's an anchor. It's an anchor for our souls.
It kind of like, okay, that I can understand. Otherwise,
theoretical, conceptual, oh, inner healing, believe this,
believe that it's really hard for us to grasp. But if we
imagine that little child of us again, and we go back and talk
to it, that helps heal us because we're our soul can walk
through that our soul can understand that. So my point is
that we have these aspects of ourselves that get stunted when
we have been traumatized at a particular age, in a particular
area, like say, for instance, if you were five, when you
started believing something about yourself, or in it
started being affirmed and entrenched in you in a very
significant way, sometimes it will emotionally stunt us to
five years old in that particular area of our life,
which is why we are very embarrassed at how we act when
we're triggered. We act like children in those areas. Why?
Because we were stunted. It's as if we were stunted emotionally
at that age to that age. So you go back and allow that aspect of
you, you heal it and you talk to it, and you allow it to grow up
is I know it's very strange, but that's what that's what it when
you actually walk through the inner healing yourself or with
someone else, that's actually what ends up happening. It's
like this, that that part of you grows up. So it was all of those
things that I was kind of thinking when you were talking
about the dream is like, I wonder if God is just telling
her, hey, there's this aspect of her that is that is of ever
being that we can so easily relate to and connect with, if
we think of it as a child, because we don't expect anything
of it. So yet you you at whatever age you are, you've got
all kinds of expectations of yourself and what you should be
or what anyone should be when they're your age. Well, I'm an
adult and I should be should be should be. But if you imagine
that yourself as this child, it's a lot easier to connect
with the person that God sees you as now, which is perfect,
which is innocent, which is treasured, which is, you know,
delightable, and everything. So if you imagine yourself as that
child, like not even like, I don't know if he's telling you,
you know, you could you could that hate to take yourself on
isn't like, I know the fact that you need some emotional healing
and so love, love that little girl that needed or wanted x, y
and z. But I think that it may may even mean, you know, just
you now, but it's easier for you to see as a child, because you
don't even have any expectations of it. And God's like, okay,
that is how I see you now. You're that treasured, you're
that special. You're that, you know, innocent, enjoy that
person understand that that is who you are. Do you want to
reject you? Or do you want to actually fully allow yourself to
be yourself so that you can you that who it is that you really
are, can feel safe enough to come out to be like what we were
talking about with Diana to actually be out of who you are,
instead of always trying to think what should I do by this,
the by this age, or by this maturity in the Lord, or by
this career, you know, point my life, you know, instead of
trying to think, well, what what standards should I be hitting?
And what what mark should I be checking off? Instead of that,
you know, who actually am I into just into just be but you're not
going to know that unless you see yourself the way that you
know, like that baby, and then you have to fully accept you,
you can't read and I'm not telling you that you're
rejecting, I'm talking in theoretically, whoever would do
this can't, they can't, they've got to stop rejecting
themselves. I have a very strong tendency to reject myself. This
is this is why I teach them.
because I know this. I can feel it within me and God started to give me the words,
Ashley, this is what you're doing. You're rejecting you. And I've entrusted you
with you before I've entrusted you with anything else and with anyone else. And so you need to take
that very seriously. And if I've entrusted you with it, something I cannot have you reject it
because, you know, I mean, the Lord talks about what, how he, what he will do to fight for and
to protect things that are not being protected, like the widows and the orphans that are being
abandoned and whatever. So God does the same thing for us. He's like, you need to accept
yourself fully. He said, I'm trying to protect you and your body is trying to protect itself
from you. Your soul is trying to protect itself from you. You need to fully receive you. So
anyway, um, could be wrong, but I do pay attention to the things that just pop up without me trying
to think of anything in the moment, you know, when they, when someone said it and that's what
popped into my head. So you can ask the Lord about it, but, and I, I could be wrong. I don't
think that it's about, you know, your past and your, your, you know, and, and their part of
yourself that needs to be healed. I mean, I'm sure that you have them because we all do,
but I think that maybe because of the timing that it's probably about, you know, just, um, uh, that
it's probably about that is how he sees you. And he wants you to fully accept who it is that you
are, because he sees you as innocently and as, as need of love and attention and being cared for as
that baby does. It can't survive on its own. It really does need to be nurtured and loved on and
treated very tenderly without any responsibilities or expectations other than just being loved for
being it. Anyway, those are my thoughts. You can ask the Lord. No, it sounds right.
Sometimes we just know we're like, no, I think that's right.
Okay. I'm glad that's occurred. All right. Well, was there anything else before we jump off? I
didn't want to cut any, anyone off the side, open the floor. Well, I know Rita, when you were
talking to, you were talking about the, a coworker or whatever, I guess they kind of made an accusation
against you and like, not in a loving way or kind way and kind of like a shaming way. So I guess I
don't, do you remember that? Didn't we say there was a question around that? Do you remember what
it was? Yeah. It's kind of like in the moment, you know, I, I felt threatened and then I guess,
how to let that go and just receive it as instruction or not receive it so negatively.
Cause you know, I start self condemning like, ah, I made a mistake, you know, and then I have all
these negative feelings toward them and toward myself. Yeah. What I, what I used to do is I used
to disassociate myself from what I did. Cause I was, I would be in those situations too at work
and and I would just have to disassociate myself and be like, okay. And who, who am I to the Lord?
Not, not what am I good at? What's my personality? Who am I to the Lord? And am I enough?
And, and, and so again, I had to choose, okay, am I unconditionally loved and accepted? I'm
unified with him. And they couldn't be concepts. I had to choose that union. I had to choose
that. I really am that loved and accepted. And then I had to just kind of like, I don't know,
I had to choose it. That was the reality of my existence, the reality of the world that I lived
in. I had to, I had to just take God strictly at his word. Cause I didn't feel like it, especially
in situations like that. I had to disconnect my identity from what it is that I did.
And like, yeah, but who am I? Okay. Well, I'm, I'm actually enough. I'm actually okay.
This I'm, I'm not bad. I'm not evil. I did this, but I'm learning about how to do certain things
in life and I'm learning certain principles and I'm learning what's, what's really what'll help
things progress and what'll help and what'll cause things to regress, you know, and projects
and whatever. So it's a learning experience, but it has nothing to do with who I am. The,
who I am is simply living out a nerve Lee experience, but it's not defining me.
It's not whatever. And so that's, that's what helps me because you're still dealing with the
reality of, look, you did something that in our world is called a mistake. Now, I don't know if
you did, but I'm telling you, like, if it's like worst case scenario, you know, that I would live
through, like, no, I really did do that. And I shouldn't do that again. You know, kind of a thing.
I would think, well, it is reality.
So you're not telling yourself,
oh, it didn't matter.
It did.
So it's in the face of that,
that I have to choose to separate my identity.
And it's not real,
if I don't acknowledge the reality
of what it is that I did.
I acknowledge that, okay,
so I shouldn't have done this.
Or maybe you should have,
and they just thought that you shouldn't have been,
it was just a matter of opinion, whatever.
Point is, that whatever it is,
that you are not what you've done,
or not done, or whatever.
And then because we really do have to choose
that that is our,
that that's the, what's the word?
That that's the most important thing,
that that's our value,
is our identity, not what we do.
And then it can,
and the strongest place
to make a record of that in yourself,
is when something happens that is bad.
In other words, that you have done something
that you even disagree with.
You're like, yeah, I shouldn't have done that.
Or you sin.
Yeah, I know I shouldn't have done that.
Or no, I don't wanna do that.
Or I know exactly what God says about that.
Those are literally the strongest,
most impactful times for you to make a particular choice
to disassociate yourself from what you've done.
Disassociate, meaning like disassociate your identity.
It's not that you wanna disassociate
because you have to acknowledge that it's real,
and that it's important,
in order for your choice to actually mean something.
Because if you're ignoring that this exists,
or you're ignoring the impact of it,
you're not really making the choice.
The only way you can really make a choice
is if there's two things to choose from.
This has to be a legitimate choice
in order for this one to actually count
as a choice that you make.
But anyway, so as hard as those things are,
that's when everything changes,
is when you do it in the hard times.
So anyway, that's what I used to do.
But that's how I would handle situations like that,
is I just disassociated my identity from it.
And no, please understand, it's not easy.
I'm just talking about it.
And so when we talk about it, it all sounds easy.
I'm telling you this, remembering, it's very hard.
It is very hard because you feel,
well, at least I do, I feel ugly inside.
I just feel yuck and everything.
And I had to choose, what does God say?
And does what God say, is that more important to me
or is it not?
Or is me and how I feel more important to me?
And I had to make a choice.
And so, and yeah, it's hard.
So, but anyway, is it helpful?
Yes, definitely, yeah.
All right.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I have one more follow-up question about that,
because I've dealt with this at work too.
And I think I deal with it
with just my personal relationship too.
Is there a way of like,
if you feel that someone has treated you in an unkind
or unloving way to address them in rest, you know?
Is there a way to do it?
Yeah, like, what's, can you walk us through that?
Like, it's like, oh no, like that wasn't okay.
That wasn't kind, that wasn't cool.
You know what I mean?
I don't know.
I just feel like sometimes as Christians,
like this is me even speaking,
like I identify with what Rita said,
but I've experienced this myself,
where it's kind of like, okay, like, you know,
we're taught like, oh, well, you know,
turn the other cheek, yada, yada, yada.
But you're like, okay, at what point do I say,
do I stand up for myself?
But I do, how do I do that in a way of rest,
where I speak like the truth or my truth about a situation?
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, yeah.
Well, the easiest way to do it,
I say, well, sorry, the simplest way to do it.
Simplest way to do it is, not easy, I know,
but the simplest way to do it is to actually, you know,
shift into your identity, you know,
choose, remember what God said,
who God says that you actually are.
One of the ways to do that is to do what I do sometimes,
which is, okay, Christ, you know,
I believe that I came out of you.
I believe that I've been reinserted back into you,
that I abide in you and you abide in me.
We abide in the father and the father abides in us,
and therefore I'm always about my father's business,
to kind of like walk myself through that.
But, and if you do it, when you have time,
it'll become much more familiar
so that it's easier for you to do it without,
if you don't have time to walk yourself through that.
Like say, for instance, somebody is right in your face
and they're,
got a moment and you don't have time to like, okay, sorry, Hank,
can you hold the phone just a second? Okay. You know, so the
thing is that if you practice this, and if you strengthen this
muscle, you'll be able to very quickly shift into your
identity because you're familiar with telling yourself how to do
that. Your soul is very familiar with shifting into that place
without you having to walk through the whole process or the
whole whatever. You did that in order to familiarize yourself
with making a choice that you are who God says that you are to
have faith. So anyway, just FYI, it's better practiced, you know,
in order to strengthen it, then in that moment, then like, so
from that sense of identity, you won't feel threatened by what
the other person says anymore, then, because you're not
threatened, that will that from that place, again, you know, we
kind of have a theme going tonight, you know, from like,
what we were talking about with Diana, is you'll just very
naturally know what how to handle the situation. And it'll
kind of come a little bit more out of your being, it's a little
clearer to hear God a little meaning I was I was trying to,
like, you know, soften that, but it's a lot easier to hear the
Lord. And then it's a lot easier to kind of feel through in the
spirit, through the situation, right? Okay, how should I
respond? Because you're not threatened, when you feel
threatened, you're always going through your soul to try in your
mind to try to figure out, okay, wait, what what what, like tips
and tricks that I read about in that really cool book called no
boundaries by Dr. Henry McLeod, you know, what do you say to do,
you know, I'm not gonna put up with that, you know, and you're
trying to remember stuff. But if you just operate a bit more from
you know, but if you're operating more from your being,
then you're operating from the love of God and the love of God
knows a lot of things. The love of God knows that person's
background and how they're going to take certain phrasing, you
don't know that. But he does. So like, he'll guide you through
that. And you'll and because what they need to encounter is
they need to encounter God's love through you, that will
change the conversation, they literally will not be convinced
by you explaining your side of things, they just won't. Because
the reason why they're reacting is not based on logic, it's
based on how it emotionally impacted them. And that has
stuff to do with their background, and that moment, and
all kinds of stuff. So psychology can only get us so
far. So anyway, and that's what I would recommend, you know, and
then also seeing them once you see yourself as spirit, you're
like, Oh, I'm not threatened. It's easier to see them like
that, too. It's easier for them to see them with compassion,
etc, which will change how you talk to them. Because I always
recommend that you talk to someone in who it is, how it is
that you see them through God's eyes, and not through the
brokenness that they're expressing themselves at and
they're in the fearful soul and body that that they think that
they are identified as. And then so you're going to talk to them
kinder, you're going to be pouring, you know, heaps of coal
on their head, and on your enemy's head, you know, because
you don't have any reason to be threatened. So you're blessing
them. You know, in your words, you're loving on him, that'll
completely change everything. So like I was telling Rita, when
you talk about all this, it all sounds easy. I'm very aware that
it's very hard, I actually had to live it in order to learn it.
And then it took years in order for me to be able to have the
for the Lord to give me the words to be able to articulate
it. So I lived this before I understood it. So my point is
that it worked. And I began to live like that, because that's
how God was orchestrating me in the moment to be with the person
to love them through Christ. And then and then I was trying to
figure out, so what am I doing? And how am I doing this? And
then, you know, a few years later, the Lord began to
rebuild, this is this is what you were doing. And this is why
this is the theological background of how all of this
works. So I could explain it to other people. So this isn't a
theory. This is what I actually live and have lived, God finally
gave me words to explain how I'm doing it. So anyway, just to
give you encouragement, because it all sounds pie in the sky.
And it sounds Oh, isn't that wonderful? I mean, it's not a
concept. And it's not a theory. Of course, it's what I believe
is what I live. And you can choose what you want to do.
So is that helpful?
Yes.
Okay, there's always more we could talk about all that. But
that good for tonight? Yes. helpful enough. Good. All right,
let's get to see all of y'all. We'll get back on the road.
Yes.
Bye.
Thank you. Enjoy. Be careful. Bye bye. Thank you.
Talking to all my Texas peeps tonight.
Bye.