Hi! How are you? I'm good. I just got in the door, so I was like, oh!
Well, I'm glad it worked out. Yeah, I'm so glad it worked out.
Yes! It was so, like, I was gonna book it for yesterday
and then I looked at the link and I was like, oh, I need to just quickly go swim and when
I got back, like, it was all taken. I was like, oh, that was fast.
Oh, I'm sorry. No, it's all good. There was room today, so
that's good. What was today?
No, I said there was still room today, so. Oh, there was room, yeah.
Yeah. Yes.
Sorry, I am pulling up your questions. Sorry, I'm listening. I'm just pulling up
your questions, making sure all of those to be able to reference. So, yeah, so how have you,
have you been just in general since we, since the, the personal ministry session?
Going through. I, yeah, I, I think, like, like, I wrote,
like, the next, the following day, I was just like, oh, my goodness, I probably should have
said that, or, you know, how it, like, comes up, like, different things, when you're like, oh,
yeah, but so I've been, I've been good, but I've been busy, so it's just, like, I haven't really,
I, yesterday, I listened to the, what is it, session four with the two exercises, so I did
that, yeah. I've been hanging out a lot with you. It's, like, driving to the cabin. I was listening
driving home from the cabin. I was listening, so, so we've been hanging out, like, every day.
Okay, well, now I know. In the spirit, we've been together. Well, I'm glad that you're enjoying
continuing to watch them. I try to encourage people to do that. I'm like, I know that you've
already watched them, and you think you've already watched them, but I promise, if you start
implementing them, and you re-watch them, you will discover stuff that you never heard me say the
first time, and you'll be like, oh, my word, I can do that, or now that makes sense, you know,
so, anyway, people, like I said, people go back for months, literally sometimes years, to go back
and watch some of that stuff, and they're like, oh, my word, it's just, not just as a reminder,
but in order to go deeper, because in order to go deeper and rest, and go into rest, and literally
area of your, every area of your life, is the same thing that you do to go into the first step,
to take the first step, to go into the first, with everything, it's very simple, it's very,
it's just as powerful for the big things, as it is for the little things, for the deep things,
as it is for the surface level, so, anyway, some that you're enjoying, and that it's helpful.
Yeah, yeah, so, so, so, in general, I've been, like, feeling good, but I still, I'm still, like,
like I said, I keep going back over it, because I feel like I'm not quite grasping it, and that's
like, so, I still see, that's why I had the question with the weight thing, and, like, the
health coach, and, like, how do I go about it, because now it's, like, so, with my dad, I had
that question, like, oh, because that could just, there will always be things, you know what I mean,
where it's, like, oh, you can keep digging, you can have, like, layers, but generally speaking,
I feel fine, and I'm at peace, I have the interview tomorrow, I had, like, a big leaders
assembly thing today, and, like, all of that is fine, like, I'm at rest when I'm, like,
thinking about that, doing that, all of those things, but.
When you're thinking about what and doing what?
Yeah, so, when I had, like, a big presentation today at work, like, then I'm fine, I'm at rest,
like, I'm not stressing about it, or, like, the interview for tomorrow, like, I'm not really
stressing about it, but. That's right, like, tomorrow.
Yeah, but it's still, like, so, with that, though, I'm still, like, trying to, I mean,
because I remember you said, because I'll still be, like, oh, my goodness, like, is this me just
panicking, you know, trying to get out, because it's, like, too chaotic where I am, so I'm trying
to, like, find the next level of rest where I'm, like, not worrying about taking the wrong
decision, I'm sorry, I don't know how to turn off my messenger, and it keeps, like, somebody's
talking about paddle, and I'm, like, I don't know what you're talking about, so it's just, like.
Um, yeah, um, so with both, I think with.
both like the weight and like the job it's like still two of those core things that I'm wondering
like oh how do I make sure that I'm not making the wrong decision and then I know you've said like oh
but it's not about that like you have to give up like I think even your husband said like oh just
take yourself out of the equation and like leave it to God and I feel like that's kind of what
you've said in that too like when it comes to the job um so correct me if I'm wrong because I or if
I'm like misunderstanding it so that's what I've been thinking that oh I need to like just try to
like not try just be at peace and just whether I get the job or accept it or not that
whatever God has for me is not like it's not going to ruin it with I do something else
or you know what I mean it's okay what so I think to backtrack it's that hole where I felt like in
my last position God told me I was going to leave and then I felt like something new was going to
happen and then a job opening where I am right now opened up but I ended up not getting it
um and then my father passed away and then I was like oh good thing I didn't start a new job because
I wouldn't have been at a capacity to deal with that and especially knowing what this company
is like now I'm like I definitely would not um so then when things settled down
I got a text and then I had a short conversation and then I was pretty much offered the job over
the table and so I kind of just took it without thinking because I was like well I feel like you
know this is God because he offered it to me once and then out of his kindness he let me not have it
because he could see what was coming and then he gave me like another chance um to step into it now
well when in that process I had a sense that I won't be here for long I think I told you that
and then I was like um I I had a sense I won't be here for long because something's going to happen
this fall you know like and automatically I was like I'm going to meet somebody or God's going
to open a door into something else um so I think now that my previous boss contacted me and said oh
I would like an application from you as well and I applied and I now have the interview tomorrow
where I'm not at rest it's like do I stay where I am or do I go to this new job if I get the offer
is that what I have because I don't think that's what I have the sense of being you know what I
mean so I think it's that whole being able to be at rest that God has control over my destiny and
I mean I know he does and that I think I'm just fearful of making wrong decisions still
yeah um so the fear of making a wrong decision clouds our or resists our ability to be able to
hear God be able to very to hear clearly um it's it's not just clouding our judgment it's resisting
our ability to hear him so the more that we actually just release ourselves to the freedom
in God that he literally died to give us the freedom that that we have to make a mistake
the freedom that we have to act to make the wrong decision whether it be intentionally or
unintentionally the the more that we do that then the more the easier it is um to more clearly hear
the Lord's will to be co-deciding with him about what we're going to do by co-deciding again you
know that it's it depends on how mature that we are in the Lord as to how much our opinion weighs
in the conversation but it's still significant we always have a voice no matter how little
and young we are you know in particular measures of faith in the Lord we always have a voice um
so it just depends on how much of his character that we're expressing as to and that we're living
as to how much of weight that our opinion is carrying so in the final position but um so
anyway it just just that is the first thing that I would suggest is is to again remember is choose
that you
you and God really are okay.
Now, that phrasing may not resonate with you.
If not, pick a different phrasing,
something that makes more sense to you,
but that you and God are okay,
or that he unconditionally loves and accepts you,
or that he's looking on you thoroughly,
enjoying you and delighting in you.
You know, in other words,
to choose that you really are existing,
living in and abiding in a complete freedom,
that is not being limited to,
or needs to feel threatened
by the potential of making a mistake.
That's really what it comes down to,
is understand that you're not threatened
by making a mistake.
If you make a mistake, it's in your soul or your body,
which is not where your identity is seated.
It is the aspect of you,
but it's not where your identity is seated.
And so your identity, you,
whatever it is that you are,
your connection with the Lord,
that cannot be threatened.
So you're not threatened even by the potential
or the actuality of your own sin.
So that's what we keep being concerned about.
That's what creates so much stress and so much pressure,
is the feeling that we're under threat
of possibly making a wrong decision.
And making a wrong decision is not threatening to you.
It's not threatening to your relationship with the Lord.
And we can all talk about that conceptually,
but it really is something that we have to choose,
is the reality of the,
and the extent and the degree to which of our freedom.
That our freedom really is that big.
We are free to make mistakes.
God wants to mature us so that we,
so that it's not that we don't make mistakes,
but that we're reflecting of his character.
The whole mistake thing is thinking his character is this,
and it's actually not.
So the whole thing is not,
the whole point is not to avoid mistakes.
It's earlier than that.
The whole point, you know,
before we ever get to a mistake,
the whole point is reflecting the character of the Lord.
And so anyway, that is the first thing,
is to stop, to stop creating that resistance
to by thinking,
by being afraid of making the wrong decision.
Release yourself into the freedom
between you and the Lord of making the wrong decision.
Not that you're wanting to,
but free yourself that you're not threatened
if you make the wrong decision.
If you make the wrong decision,
because like, okay, you moved,
and I can move a car that's in motion.
I can steer a car that's in motion.
Yeah.
So, so anyway,
so that will make it easier to be able to hear.
It'll also help you more emotionally release the outcome.
Like, okay, which one do I really wish
and really hope that he would say for me to do?
If you release yourself from the threat
of being concerned that you're going to make a mistake
or that you're going to make the wrong decision,
then it automatically helps you release a bit more
of your emotional tie to what, to the outcome.
Like, well, I really don't want to do this.
And I really want to do this.
I really hope God will let me do this,
but is that what I'm supposed to do?
You know, or am I doing it out of fear or am I whatever?
Yeah.
So that is another thing.
Again, I'm not trying to make any of this complicated,
not meaning to make any of this sound complicated.
I'm trying to present different things to you
that you'll know in your spirit what resonates,
like, oh, that's the holdup right there,
or that made sense, or, okay,
that finally was the key that unlocked that part of me
that was locked up or tied down
or felt restricted or restrained.
So another thing to think about, you know,
as in like, as in also releasing the threat
of feeling like, you know, you're under threat
if you make a bad mistake.
I mean, if you make a wrong decision and a mistake.
So not, so there's that.
Another thing that you can do is to,
well, let me think about that just a second,
how to phrase that in a way that'll,
go ahead, did you have a question?
Yeah, no, because just, I think ultimately
either of those, these two jobs
are not necessarily what I feel called to.
So I think there's something else he has for me
and kind of like what your husband said too,
I feel there's something,
when he said three to five months,
I'm like, yeah, that makes sense with what I felt earlier,
you know, this year and even last year.
So I think that's kind of where.
or my, Oh, am I just not trusting God, you know, moving
into this? Or, or do I need to move into this to like, I don't
know, but it's Yeah, but I think it's good to just like, try to.
Yeah, well, the other thing to not feel in line with what
you're saying, the other thing to to release, to release that
you're that we create resistance in and we need to let go of is,
is feeling threatened by yourself, feeling threatened by
your reason for why you're wanting to do what you're
wanting to do. I'm not saying that we're not just like, just
like what I was talking about with our bodies or whatever, you
know, we're not agreeing with why we're making the decision
and saying it's okay to make it out of fear, or it's okay that
we're wanting to make it out of fear. We're not doing all of
that. All we're doing is we're stopping fighting that part of
ourselves. Stop fighting the fact that we're making the
decision or the that the desire has been created out of fear. Or
what if it is? I don't know if it is. But what if it is out of
fear? What if it is because they're not trusting God, then
we're feeling threatened by that we're thinking, oh, see, that's
wrong. And I need to stop it. And I would need whatever. And
we just need to let all of that go.
Yeah, because I think that's a core thing in me. Like, even
when I went to Iris, I was like, should I have been an Irish
should have gone to Bethel? Like, I feel like this is a
constant battle where I'm always second guessing. Did I hear God
right? Did I make the right decision? And now here I am
again, with the same kind of thing, you know, so like,
yes. So basically, stop being afraid of yourself. Okay. So
again, that whole aspect of like fully love and accept yourself
where you're stopping resisting your own self. Like, okay, I
think that you're a potentially a rebellious child, you know,
talking to your like, you're not thinking about your own soul and
body. I think you're a rebellious child that I really
have to watch and to keep an app to keep under control. And I
have to be very vigilant to make sure you're doing everything
right. And you don't step out of line because all my word you go
get lost in the grocery store if I'm not like watching you all of
the time kind of thing. Yeah. And so and that is creating our
own resistance that is, and that's making it harder to not
just to hear the Lord, but to also actually emotionally let go
of the outcome. Yeah, if we need to start letting go of all of
that, we have all of this resistance, all of these places
in us that are locked down and God, God spilled his blood, so
that we'd be free. So that wouldn't be so locked down so
that we wouldn't be living under such emotional and mental and
physical limitations. So it'll be easier to make decisions to
be able to hear the word of Lord to be able to emotionally release
and let go of the outcome and give it to the Lord. If you just
stop resisting things, as opposed to think is a and I'm
talking about that is kind of like the first, almost like a
first step. Not that there's like all of these steps, but
like in how to put that, that you're not because understand
that what we're doing here is I'm trying to, is I'm telling
you how to bring yourself back to neutral. I'm not telling you,
and we're not talking about how to actually act in the character
of the Lord or even believe in sort of, technically, at the
root of it, it's actually choosing to believe in that we
won't get into that complication, because that just
makes it feel more complicated than it really is. But we're
just trying to bring yourself to neutral, instead of resisting
yourself to stop resisting. And then from there, it'll be easier
to start letting things go and allowing God to emotionally
emotionally releasing God from the outcome, allowing trusting
him for the outcome, like, okay, God, you know, and be more
clear, it easier to hear God more clearly as to whether you
should do this or that you're just bringing yourself to
neutral. And so that's really what I've talked about in these
pat in these couple of things, it's not feeling threatened by
your, your potential, you know, your potential to make a
mistake in making a decision, or feeling threat, and then also
releasing the threat of feeling of, of yourself and your reason
why you're coming to, to the desire that you have, in other
words, why you're desiring what you're desiring, just, just let
it be. So you're just you're using basically, it's the same
idea as the same conclusion that you come to in using the third
rest shifting tool, which is no judgment, is you're just stop
And judging the situation, you're stopped being afraid of it.
You're stopping, you know, making it out to, to be something that it's
not or fighting what it just is.
Just let it be that you're, you're, you're not agreeing with it.
You're not saying it's okay.
You're not saying it's okay to be afraid.
If you really discover that you are afraid it's, it's, you're not
agreeing with the fact that it's okay to not trust God, you're just not
resisting the fact that you are, that you are afraid of God or that you are.
Is if, if you were to come to that and then, then it's easier to let go, but
it's harder to let go when you're spending all of your energy, fighting
what it is that you don't want to be true, just accept that it's true
or accept that it might be true.
Just no longer felt threatened by it.
And then it'll be easier to move in a positive direction from there.
Yeah.
Is that the same thing with.
Cause I think, I think I had mentioned when, when your husband gave that word
and I was like, oh, like it resonates and parts I've heard before and part of me
is just like, oh, but it hasn't happened.
You know, like why?
Like anything really like, like the words that I have over my life, kind of like,
like, so when he gave me that word too, I was like, yes, I receive it, but then
there's part of me that's like, but I don't know if it's like, why I really
want to believe it's going to happen.
Like even when it was like three to five months and I know that resonates
with my spirit from what before.
And he also said three to five years.
So I'm not holding to like, but especially when he said something will
happen or I believe something will happen in like the next three to five
months and it resonates with my spirit.
So I, I agree with it, but at the same time, I'm also like, I don't know.
I've hoped for, and believe that before, after being given a word and nothing
happened, so I think, I think, um, so that's, I think we're not, we're not
supposed to hold on to the word and have faith in the word that was spoken or the,
in other words, the promise, the thing that God said happened for one thing, we
have no idea what it actually means.
Yeah.
And then another, I mean, like even listening to what, what he said and you
said other things that have spoken on your life, you have no idea what that
actually looks like in real life.
I mean, like, well, what would my life look like?
And who would I be meeting?
What does it mean that I'm meeting them?
What does it mean I'm interacting with them?
I mean, good night.
It can meet a variety of things.
So there's nothing to be able to grab ahold of anyway, but it's
there's nothing to be able to grab ahold of anyway.
Um, and, and even if there were, we're not supposed to hold on to it.
We're supposed to hold on to the one who promised when he's speaking something,
he's all, he's trying to say something about himself that he's wanting to give
you, not giving this thing, giving you him an aspect of himself, but the way
he's trying to communicate it is by using something that you have that, that kind
of, that that's within your value system.
So you're like, Oh my Lord, you'd be that good.
Or Oh my word, Lord, you love me that much.
So what I've had to do with things like promises, words, prophecies is be like,
is, is always focused on, Oh my word, Lord, you, you're that good.
You, you see me, you, whatever, and always focus on that and just allow God.
In his word, the word that was spoken, both accomplish it.
Am I coming into agreement with it is not in understanding it and having an anchor
to be able to like, agree with it as a, as a theme, because I don't
even know what that thing is.
It's coming into agreement with, okay, God, you know, you are who you say that
you are, and therefore you will carry out whatever it is that is expressing
that thing that you are and who you are is what I am holding my faith in.
That is unshakable.
This is shakable.
Not only the fact that we don't know what it looks like, but just the
when and the how and the whatever.
There's, there's too many.
This is the path that we end up taking to whatever God wants us to do.
It's not straight.
So it's pretty shakable.
But if we hold on to him, that's unshakable, no matter what happens.
So that allows us our faith to stay consistent instead of how our faith
wobbles, if we're looking over here.
Yeah, that's, that's really good.
I, yeah, I think I was concerned that.
Um, I think you had mentioned one time that, Oh, that is holding like not
believing it or not, maybe not believing it, but being scared that.
that it won't happen, that that is holding resistance towards God and then he can't be
able to give you something because you're resisting him or something.
I'm sorry, can you repeat that one more time?
I'm just trying to, I think I had mentioned it before, I'm trying to remember, because
I'd mentioned something like this before, after our session, and I had said, oh, I'm
not sure that I believe that it can, like, I want to believe, but I'm not sure that I
believe that it will happen.
And then I think you had said something that, oh, that is resisting God or no holding judgment
towards God or resisting him or something.
I felt like I needed to do something to let it go to be able to open up kind of for him
to do whatever he wanted to do, whatever that is.
Oh, I think I know what you're talking about.
Yes, because not believing God is resisting him.
In fact, not believing God is rejecting him.
And so that's why resisting is so, so serious is because it's an outright rejection of God
in that particular aspect, in that particular way, that particular aspect of himself.
You know, so and I don't mean that to sound just horribly scary where, again, it locks
us down, but it is very serious in the fact that that's why we're not supposed to resist.
So in other words, we're just supposed to be freer.
So because God gives us a safe environment to learn and to make mistakes.
So yeah.
So what it is that you don't have to worry about is, is, is like the, okay, so say for
instance, you're like, okay, well, I'm not sure if it's if I believe that it's actually
going to happen.
That is because we focus on the actual thing itself that we don't understand.
And we don't, and we don't understand how, where it is that we are can bring us to where
it is that God talked about.
We don't understand how we're trying to apply worldly logic that we were taught.
I mean, it's not just that we were taught it.
We got in trouble by our teachers if we did not use this logic.
So it is so ingrained in us that we were, we were, we bore physical, emotional, or circumstantial
consequences of not following this logic.
So it's survival mode for us because it's so ingrained.
And so that is not how the kingdom of God works.
We can't choose to believe something based off of evidence of like, yeah, but I, that's
really hard to see from here to there.
I don't understand the how I tried this before.
That is something that has happened so many times with, with people in the Bible where
they're like, God, I had tried this before.
Yeah.
Where I'm case in point, case in point, the Peter, this is one of my favorite examples
to use at this is when Peter had been fishing all night long.
I mean, he's a professional fisherman.
He knew what to do and he did it all night long.
I mean, talk about discouraged when you're a mastery of your, in your, in your craft
and in your, in your skills.
And Jesus said, Hey, I want you to throw it over the side of the boat.
And so he's thinking, Hey, look, dude, you're, you don't know what you're talking about.
I know what I'm talking about.
And you, you know, you're a carpenter.
I didn't know if you knew that much about Jesus at the time, but he's like, you know,
Look, you're not a fisherman and I have to, and I not only know what to do, I've tried
it and I've tried it all night long.
I'm like beyond discouraged.
And, and, but he said, but because you said, so I will do it.
He literally did it on nothing but word, not on reason, not on experience.
And in fact, he said, because you said it, it will override my, my, the evidence that
I have literally putting my life and my emotions on the line for the, over the past night to
get it to work.
And it didn't.
And I will literally do it on nothing but the fact that you said, and then that made
all of the difference because the word then brought a miracle.
So it's so, but what it is that we have to choose is like, because you said, therefore
you will carry it out.
So my faith is on you, not that it will manifest.
That's basically what you're choosing.
You're choosing God, not the manifestation.
You're choosing that.
What that he is true and that he is faithful and that whatever he sends out in word will
actually land.
Because it says that in Isaiah.
All of his words, you know, maybe it's not Isaiah, but I thought it was that,
and he, uh, that all of the words that he sends forth, you know, always, um,
accomplish that, which they were sent to do.
So when that's what you're trusting, you don't have to do anything.
All you're having to come into agreement with is the fact is, is God and the fact
that, and, you know, and his character and that, which, how would you put that?
Remember when he's sending out word, he's not sending out something.
He's not sending out like some verbal law that he's speaking.
He's actually sending out in a manner of speaking, peace, impartial of himself.
Remember word with a capital W that's what you're believing in.
Yeah.
You're not believing you're not having to worry about believing in a
manifestation of whether or not something is or isn't going to happen.
You're like, no, God, you were faithful.
And therefore, if you send peace and partial of yourself out, it'll always
land, always manifest in something.
And so I, like the rest of the world and waiting and anticipation
of what that's going to look like.
You anticipate that God will land.
That God will manifest that there will be in a, that there will be an actual
result, but you don't leave.
And like, you don't have to focus on the actual thing itself, but you can be.
Excited and anticipate it.
Yeah.
Because I think that's where kind of like my thing has been where it's like,
Oh, cause I always keep hearing and I've experienced it.
So it's not just like hearing, but, Oh, you have so much favor and so many open
doors and it's like, Oh, there's this calling on your life and there's, and,
and I can feel it cause I feel like I can't feel that well, I can feel that
I'm not, um, which we've talked about before necessarily working or doing
whatever I feel like I'm resonates in my spirit and, and, and so, but I think
now that I've learned to just.
And this is making more sense that I just release all of that and then just
trust, uh, Oh my goodness.
Uh, and that I just trust, um, that God's gonna take me to wherever I need to be.
I think my fear has been, you know, sometimes you hear, well, if God said
it, you need to act towards it.
And if not, you know, he'll send somebody else or it's like, you know, that kind of
like, Oh, I missed it or I didn't do what he was supposed to.
And so we have to send somebody else.
Cause I was over here and I didn't really understand or know what I was supposed to
do.
So I just kept like fumbling in the dark, not in the dark, but like going here and
there and there, you know, not necessarily being like in, in human logic, like, Oh,
here I go from a to B to C and this is my plan and my career.
And this is what I want to do.
You know, if that makes sense.
Yeah.
If you are focused on trying to accomplish what God wants you to accomplish, you're
more likely to miss God.
If you focus on God and not what you're trying to accomplish or where you're
trying to go or what's supposed to happen, you will land there.
Yeah.
Because the whole point is that we just focus on the development of our
Lord.
And he's more interested in that than even you are.
He's more interested in hearing him and knowing him than you are.
So if you focus on that and you focus on, okay, God, what are we doing today?
Okay.
And where are you allowing us to go?
You can have dreams.
You can have desires.
You and the Lord can determine certain quote unquote destinations, et cetera.
But again, that's all based off of the, it has to be founded in the fact that you're
pursuing his character and you are focused on the development of the relationship, not
in landing places or, or, uh, accomplishing particular things.
Then you miss it.
Yeah.
We're focused on the accomplishment and what in hearing exactly what God wants us
to do, and then just trying to do the thing that we're more likely to miss it.
We're also going to get burned out.
Yeah.
Because, because we're trying to do something, accomplish something, create an
outcome instead of allowing God to create the outcome.
Don't have to worry, you know, in focusing on the Lord and pursuing where he is and
always looking for him as opposed to quote unquote, doing the right thing.
If you're always looking and then you will always accomplish that, you know,
what he intends for you and you won't miss it and you won't give the assignment to
someone else, he gives the assignment to someone else when we are being rigid, when
we are not being malleable, when we are in so much resistance.
So that's why we have to like continually to let go, continue to let go of all this
resistance, all this restriction, stop living in a straight jacket, you know, and
to just, and to really, truly live, to be.
be moldable to be, um, to be swayed and pushed around and to flow with the Holy
Spirit.
Um, and, uh, then we're more likely to hear him because we haven't locked down
and decided this is what I'm trying to do.
I'm trying really, really hard to be this or to do it.
If we release ourselves to who God says that we naturally are.
And we choose that who we naturally are is the work that he has done and is
continuing to do, not something that we're working really hard and practicing
to become, but that actually by simply letting go of everything, he does this
work in us.
And then the work that he already has done in us, which really all the work
has already been done in us, but I'm, I'm trying to make this simple.
And I said that then if we stop resisting, then who it is, all the work that he's
already done in us finally can come out.
So anyway, we won't do living life like that, living life that free and always
focused on God and ourselves and what we want to do, even what we want to do for
God and making really sure that we don't miss him.
Just living that free in God will, will, uh, will position us to not miss what he
wants us to do and accomplish wants us to accomplish and allow his, his word to
land because we're coming into agreement with who he is.
We're just allowing him to be who he is.
Okay.
Lord, if you say that that's, what's going to happen, I'm going to, I'm, I'm
going to, I am, uh, I'm not going to be resisting you moving in my life because
I, and I never know what aspect of you moving in my life is SIMP is strictly
towards that purpose.
Yeah.
You know what it is that you said that you promised what happened.
So your agreement is with him and his word, not necessarily focus, not, not
necessarily on what he said.
So to speak, I guess there you're not disagreeing with what he said, but that's
not what you were agreeing with either.
You're not disagreeing with it, but that's not what you're agreeing with.
What you're agreeing with it.
What you're agreeing with is the one who said it and the word that was spoken, not
the word that like Ed said, somebody else said not that word, but what came forth
from God, that he's like, Hey, this is the trajectory.
This is the thing that I've said in motion.
I've set something in motion and you really, God kind of gave you some English.
Verbal communication to give you an idea of what this is, but it's deeper than that.
This is the expression of what this is.
Don't look at the expression and the words that were used and extrapolate
what they could mean or what vision and life, but rather what was that an
expression of this thing really have no idea about, about what that is because
define it very well.
God's like, okay, let me give you an expression of it.
Okay.
Let me word it in English.
I know the, the, the language of English is very limited.
I know that you're going to interpret it in a particular way based on your
background, dah, dah, dah.
So it's, it's not going to be perfect, but Hey, it's an expression.
We don't focus on the expression.
We focus on that.
Do not understand that it came from, because this is what this word capital
W is what can carry this thing out.
Does that help?
Yeah.
That makes all the difference in things actually manifesting.
And I lived it.
So it's not just concept.
This is literally what I have done that is fondly enabled things like these
amazing opportunities and things that, you know, God has spoken over my life
and whatever, to finally manifest.
Cause I got out of the way.
I stopped holding him emotionally accountable for the visions that
I'd created out of these words.
And I'm just like, okay, I'm just going to focus on the, who that said it.
And the word that this was an expression of forget the expression.
This is what God said.
And therefore I'm so excited and anticipate and fully
anticipate this thing to land.
And I don't know.
It's like an adventure.
I don't know what it's going to look like when it lands.
Yeah.
No, an actual real final expression.
I was giving kind of a vague, you know, but it was just a trailer, you know?
So is that helpful?
It makes all the difference.
And coming into agreement with something, not being shakable and holding strong in
our faith and being excited and anticipating instead of being discouraged or worried
that we're not having a faith and we're not believing it also leaves us free to
live the daily life in between.
And then it allows the thing to finally land.
Eventually.
Makes so much sense.
Thank you.
Life will be bigger.
and freer and broader and have more opportunity and more life and more movement and more adventure
and more abundance. I promise you more than all of those things, not just like prophecies
God has spoken, but just anything that happened that could happen in your life when you wake
up every morning. Oh, I don't know what I know that I'm going to go to work and I'm
going to whatever, but Hey, I have no idea what God is going to do and what, how he's
going to manifest himself. You're all kinds of opportunities will start coming and she
might get, make more money and you might have better, um, better, uh, like friendship opportunities
or, uh, get, you know, your husband can finally come and you're, um, I don't know, just whatever.
It really is wild. It really will change everything. It resonates in my spirit. So I know, yeah.
Or I can feel it, you know, it's like my spirit. Yeah. So, um, I know I had a couple
more questions, but I, I think the most important thing that I would like to ask before we run
out of time, if we, it, I mean, it's the weight thing that we have talked about before. So
I think it's with that coach thing, like how, because what I've noticed is I'm, I'm, it's
going the wrong way. So I keep like a gaming weight and then, cause I keep eating bad and
I keep like, Oh, I don't want to eat. Like, I don't, it's like, Oh, I don't feel like
cooking. Oh, I don't feel like eating anything. I don't feel like doing anything. Right. And
then I end up eating, like making shortcuts that are like bad. And then I gained weight.
And then I take a look at myself in the mirror and I'm like, Oh my goodness, like you worked
so hard. And then you just like, let it all go. You know what I mean? And, and so I've
had this like health coach and she has been like, which started a year and a half ago.
And then it kind of spiraled out after my dad passed away, but I'd been really quote
good before that. And it was, it was like a, a regiment where it was like, these are
your options for breakfast. And these are your options for lunch and for dinner and
for supper. And this is how you exercise. And this is how you can, this is how many
calories it is. And you weigh yourself and you measure yourself. And so now I've also
been like, I've put the weight aside. I don't want to measure, like, I want to live in
freedom in it, but I also see that it's going the wrong way. And, and she would be like,
as I'm like, Oh, I think I need to stop this. And she is like, no, no, you know, when you're
going through a hard time, this is when it's more important to keep focused on, you know,
like eating right and exercising. And so it's like two very contradictory things. It feels
like in my head. So I'm like, ask me help. Like, what do I do?
No, that definitely makes sense. So it's, there's some things that are coming to mind.
First of all, sorry, I'm trying to remember, think of which one I want to mention first.
Maybe I'll mention this one first and then that'll probably help more easily segue into
the other, um, that you remember me talking about the importance of like owning your own
life and owning your own decisions. And like, uh, like for instance, I had mentioned as an
example and I don't remember who I was talking to, like in which fireside chat. And then you
asked the question, but whoever it was, I was referencing a previous rest intensive member.
Um, someone that was not in ours. Yeah. It was, I think so. Yeah.
About getting up in bed, getting up out of bed every morning and not picking up the backpack
full of rocks. That one. Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry. No, no, that's fine. So she, oh,
I know what you were talking about. You were thinking of the, of the lady who like lost 31
pounds. Yeah. No. So this is, this is someone that has passed rest intensive at well time before last
and she had, um, uh, she was going through a time. She knew that God had set aside this time
for her to be healing from some things. And she, but the thing is she's taken it on like a project
and it was making it very burdensome and very oppressive of like, Oh my word. Okay. What,
what more pain am I going to have to go through or navigate through today? Because God wants me
to face it and I got to heal and, or, or whatever. And so she was just thinking, Oh my word is just
like, and, and, um, so I told her, I said, okay, well, the, an important thing is that you are
taking this whole healing thing. And this, this thing that God wants to offer you is freedom.
You were taking this on as something that you, I didn't word like it's being forced on you,
but basically we're taking this thing and we're flipping it to where we see ourselves as a victim,
where we see ourselves as a victim to our own lives.
Life is full of what it is that we're waking up and having to respond to that our life is being created by decisions that other people are making, or the environment presents to us situations present to us that we have to respond to, and that's going to create
our lives today, you know, and so we're under the pressure of always being in situations with with people or environment or whatever, and we're problems in which we're are in which we are being forced into this is how it feels forced into having to come up
with the quote unquote right response that is God approved. And that will allow me to avoid the most amount of pain.
And that is a very depressing approach to life. And so often so it can be the same thing with like eating can be same thing with food is thinking that is feeling like things are being forced on us, because what we've done is we've decided hey I don't
like my weight, I don't like you know what I'm, I don't like weighing this much I want to weigh different or whatever so we think, oh well I'm choosing to diet, but then it switches where we consider ourselves a victim to the diet.
And so we're forced on me, even though we're the ones who's forcing it on ourselves, still forcing it on ourselves, instead of choosing it for ourselves I'm like no no what do I want for me, do I have to do this.
What do I want what kind of a life do I want, and think of it as pursuing something, because you're choosing to create your life so that's what you're doing when you are dieting or you're exercising is you were literally creating the life that you want, not
life that's coming.
So the life you have right now literally in this moment you were creating this moment yourself. You're not reacting to the moment you're creating it. And so it completely turns the table on the situation where you're not a victim, having to respond.
So you're owning yourself and you're choosing this is what you're going to do this is the life you want you are literally creating, you're not responding.
You know, you're
telling her is I said, I said, I said, what you're doing is you're picking up this backpack of rocks, every day and walking around with it. I said, and just thinking oh my goodness this is just, this is all so heavy, but I am forced to do all of this stuff
and whatever I said don't do that. Don't pick up the bag of rocks in the morning, and every morning wake up and think, what do me and God want to create today, what do we want to do today, how do I want to.
What kind of a life do I want and I'm not talking about any five or 10 year plan I'm not talking about that I'm talking about literally right now, what kind of an experience to what I want to do I want to have in this moment, but experienced.
I want to have in the next moment I'm talking about, create your current life. And that'll obviously create you know your future life and you can, you know,
you can do that. But I'm talking about bringing it more home bringing it more to the present. And so often we're ignoring the present responding to the present, instead of creating the present, because we're, and we're just, and we dream about the future
that we that we think of as a way that I can finally escape my present.
We can't escape our present anymore. We don't want to try to escape our present, there's nothing to escape if you're not under threat. So you have to switch yourself out of out of no longer being threatened, you're not threatened by your diet you're not threatened
by your exercise you are not threatened by your own choices.
You get to decide what do you want to do what do you not want to do if you don't want to die, do not have to dag them do the diet.
You have to choose what do I want for me. Yes, that the diet is fun. I'm not saying that I'm saying you're creating your life. And what tools can you use to help you create the life that you want right now, not that you want to five years from now the life
that you want right now.
You know, and then you and then so I also told her again as an example I said for instance, I said you go with an example of like turning the table where you do the same action, but you've switched the perspective from what you're doing the action.
As I say, say for instance that you've got no food in the pantry, and you've got no food in the refrigerator you've you ate the last thing out of it. And now you have to go to the grocery store, and you're on my word.
I don't want to have to go to the grocery store thing why why do I have to go to the grocery store Why am I in this situation. Why did the environment.
Even though, you know, that there's nobody responsible for it.
It's not like the environment is doing this to you.
We take this on as a, I don't want to, but I'm going to have to,
but we need to switch that.
Technically.
Do we have to go to the grocery store?
No, we could choose no tonight.
You know what I really, I really am just going to not eat.
That's what I would, I would rather do than go to the grocery store.
That's my choice.
You know why?
Because I, I value more.
I value my time tonight more than the 30 minutes to an hour.
That's going to take me to go to the grocery store.
That's just what I choose.
There's nothing wrong with that choice.
You just make that choice.
But, but I said, or had, do you decide that that's not the life
that you want to read for yourself?
And I, you actually want to eat.
So how do you want, so how can you then offensively create
the life that you want?
Oh, well, if I wouldn't eat tonight, then I want to go to the grocery store.
I went to get what it is that I need for tonight and bring it home and, and make
it because this is the life that I want to give me, this is the life that I want
to actually create into creation so that it actually changes creation in a very
surprising, but powerful way.
So that is, that's what I suggest is, is switching from, is switching to
owning more of yourself, your decisions to, to rule your own self instead of
being victim to, Oh, I have to, or even victim to yourself where you're like,
Oh my word, it's forcing me.
It's not forcing you.
Your S your body does not control you in either.
Does your soul, your spirit does.
So choose which part of you is going to run the show.
Yeah.
So there's no contradiction then in trying to like what we've talked about
before, trying to like, not trying to, but living from your spirit and embracing
your soul and your body.
And at the same time, kind of like doing whatever, like an exercise, exercising,
watching, like doing the calories, doing whatever, just to like get
to the goal of where, whatever.
Yeah, no, no, not at all.
Not at all.
It's the, it's the approach to it.
It's the, it's the, it's the direction from which you approach it.
It's the way in which you approach it.
Are you approaching it?
Because you're, because you're approaching it from your spirit of like, no,
this is what we're going to do.
We are going to manifest who it is that we are in spirit.
We're going to manifest that indoor soul and into our body.
And here are some, here are some tools that creation meaning, uh, that God has
created as laws put into creation that I'm going to choose to partner with me.
For instance, my body seems to be responding to it, you know, because it
believes that, you know, it is what it is, then it needs, then, um, I need
lower, fewer calories and more exercise.
Okay.
Then that's, then those are the tools that we're going to use.
Those are the things that I'm going to partner with, um, that I'm going to
allow creation to partner with me in, in, um, in utilizing, I'm going to
utilize diet and I'm going to utilize exercise and I'm going to utilize
whatever, but you'll want, um, it'll be faster and easier to lose weight.
If you, if you fully accept your body.
The way that it is without requiring it to change so that it feels safe
to respond beyond the law of diet and exercise, and you will lose more with
diet and exercise than even scientifically you would normally would.
So not only will it respond to the physical laws, you might have a miracle
of like you losing twice as much through diet and exercise than sign.
And typically you should for the amount that you're eating and this, and the,
and the exercise, why?
Because your body feels safe enough to change.
So that's where you're still using creation principles and allowing it to
partner with you, but you're allowing it to partner with you, with you as the
King, not being subject to it where, Oh, I have to, because I need it.
And it's more powerful than me.
You have to do it from the approach that you're more powerful.
Yeah.
Cause I think that last thing, I just don't fully understand how to X, like I
still haven't cracked that code of what that looks like to fully embrace my body,
regardless to make it feel safe.
Like, I don't know how to make it feel safe.
Well, you do that by, um, by remember it's not, um, you're looking past like all
of the roles and all of that pockets and all of the, whatever that you're looking
at, you're like, I really don't like that.
I don't like that.
You don't have to like it.
Your body decided that it was going to put on weight and it was going to put it there.
You don't have to agree with your body's decision.
You don't have to believe and agree with the fact that it may of, of the
reason why it made that decision.
It made it out of fear.
It made it out or whatever.
You don't have to agree with any of that.
What you're choosing is you're choosing the body, the entity, that
kind of like the will that made that decision, that that is good.
And then that is the, and that you fully love and accept it even while it's
making self-destructive decisions.
And, and you can, and part of how you can help yourself in that is to know that
the reason the body's doing it is because it thinks you're evil and it's trying to
do the right thing in an evil environment with an evil leader doesn't trust you.
I'm not saying you are evil and that it actually is.
I'm saying it's thinking I'm not safe with that spirit.
I'm not safe with it.
So I have to do the right thing on my own.
So thinks it's doing the right thing, but actually it's act, it's acting in what
God would call calls in the Bible rebellion.
Kids do the same thing.
You know, when they're going through rebellion as a teenager, they were
fighting so hard for sense of self.
And so in a way they're thinking my parents are against me.
You know, everybody's trying to like, they are in emotional and sometimes
even spiritual survival mode.
So everything is trying to do the right thing.
But if you try to do the right thing from the wrong, uh, from the, uh, by, by
rejecting truth, it's called rebellion.
You end up doing the wrong thing, even though you tried to do the right thing.
So the body is doing the same thing.
It's thinking I, you know, I can't trust anything else.
Nobody else is doing the right thing.
So I'm going to do the right thing.
I'm going to protect this body.
I'm going to do what I have to do.
In fact, honestly, the reason that, that we have fat is when we get toxins in the
body, either through hairspray or, um, you know, you know, chemicals like stuff
that we just use, you know, makeup, or we actually ingest with like food, like
too much sugar or too much, whatever it literally poisons the body.
So the fat is actually toxins that aren't coming out through the colon
or the, or the, uh, sweat glands fast enough.
So the body, in order to protect your body, neutralizes those toxins in fat
molecules, and then sends the fat to be stored somewhere to neutralize the poison.
Yeah.
It's actually trying to protect you.
And so, um, so no wonder it thinks that we're not, that we're not safe is if
we're putting poison in our body, if it's to poison and so it's afraid.
So anyway, um, that is, uh, uh, so does that, does that help?
You're actually thinking of your, the actual entity of your body, not its
decisions and not why it's making its decisions, you're actually finding the
aspect of the body itself and loving that is like this, I don't know this
partner with you in life and you're like, I, you know, I love and accept you
unconditionally.
In other words, without it having with, with no meaning, you aren't doing
anything for me that I'm loving you for.
I'm just loving you because you are you.
I choose you.
God gave me you and I didn't have a choice, but now, even though I don't
have a choice, I am intentionally choosing you over a different body or
over a different soul or whatever I'm choosing you.
And so you choose yourself like that.
Yeah.
That makes sense.
And then, so I choose my body and then, and then also maybe like, because I
choose you and because I love you, I'm going to feed you like good things and
not poison.
Yeah.
Things like that.
Yes.
And, um, and then don't, um, and so you're going to love on it and you're
going to show that it, you know, you're safe with it where, I mean, that it's
safe with you.
And then again, not it and fully accept, you know, how to talk about fully
accepting yourself and negative emotions that all you're doing is you're
bringing yourself to neutral.
You're not agreeing with the fact that like what we talked way at the beginning
of the conversation about no longer feeling threatened by the fact that you
might be making this decision or this desire or desiring this out of fear.
Same, same thing, you know, with your, with your, um, uh, with your body is not
being.
is don't well, how do I put it? It's, it's not being threatened by your body and the decisions
that it's making, understanding you're not threatened by your body. And the fact that
it's gaining weight, that's not a threat to you at all. It can, it's a, it's a child that doesn't
know what's going on and it's scared. It's like, Hey, you can be scared. That's okay. You can be
scared. I still choose you even though you're scared. And even though you're acting in a very
frustrating, annoying, time-consuming on my part way. And it now affects my life in all of these
ways. I am still, I I'm not threatened by it. I still rule over you and you don't, you're not in
charge. I am now you don't do it in that mean way, but in a mean way, but it's just kind of like,
Hey, it's like, Hey, I'm here to, with all of, not just all of the authority, but with all the
responsibility to take care of you. So you're fine. So I'm, you know, sorry that you're scared.
I'm sorry that you're afraid. That's okay. You're not agreeing with it as if it's, as if it's good
or okay to be afraid, you're allowing it to be afraid with you. You're afraid when it's with
you, it's almost like creating space for something to be the way it is instead of shoving
it out because it's the way it is. So when I pick up a huge chocolate on my way home from work,
and then I eat that, like, how, how would I approach it in that sense? You know, like,
is it like, Oh, okay. Well, how would you speak to your, you know what I mean? Cause it's like,
I mean, it's me doing it. It's not like its own entity. And I know it's a dumb choice,
you know, but it's like for comfort or for whatever. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know why.
Well, that's your soul making that choice. Your soul being afraid because your soul is the one
making the decision, right? So it's not your body making the decision to go and grab the chocolate,
you know, as if it's outside your control. It's your soul. That's making that decision. You've
decided in your mind, you've decided in your emotions or your body can be craving it, whatever
it is, you know? And so what I do, if I had, in fact, I had that last night or yesterday or the
night before, maybe it was the night before. I don't remember. It was last night or the night
before. And I was thinking, and, and, um, I, I went to the, uh, uh, went to the pantry,
opened it up. And of course I'm seeing all of this snacky things.
And I really don't struggle much at all with snacking anymore. I used to horribly like beyond
horribly beyond anything you've ever experienced. I promise you it's, it was bad. I was, it was very,
very bad. So the Lord has saved me from myself, but it would really talk to you how much sugar
I could eat at one time. I don't know how someone can eat all of that and not go
into a sugar coma. I see a sugar coma, no, an actual self poisoning coma. I don't understand
anyway, the body is miraculous and I'm very grateful. I'm safe. But, um, but the thing is
that, um, that I really don't struggle with that. And I'm struggling with it yesterday. I was like,
that's odd. Why am I struggling with it? And I realized that I was feeling out of control.
I realized that I was stressed because of some stuff that I was doing yesterday.
And I just felt like I wasn't accomplishing what I wanted to. And I didn't feel, and I realized,
okay, I'm not owning. And I didn't even word these, this, I didn't use these words with myself
basically, because I've learned to articulate all of this for other people, but I've also learned
to, uh, but that's because I learned to act on particular things without even me articulating
to myself what it was I was doing. So kind of like using a tool. And once you use it enough,
you don't have to use it anymore. You just do it. So I was doing that kind of thing. I was
shifting inside without knowing, without having the words to my, to myself and my English in the
English language as to what I was doing, but really I was realizing, Oh, wait a minute.
You feel out of control. You don't feel like you're owning your own life. You feel like things
aren't like, um, yeah, that you just aren't controlling the outcome or whatever. And I was
like, Oh, and I realized, okay, I said, remember you're just fine. You own yourself. You get to
decide how you want to live life. Meaning like you decide what it, not just what you want to eat,
but the fact that all of these things haven't been working out today,
you know, and the way that you want, is that a threat? I'm like, no, that's okay. You know,
cause I, why? Because I'm fine with God. God's fine with me. There's, there's not like something
that he's wanting me to accomplish that I'm behind on in order for him to be okay with me,
in order for him to still be in communication. So I'm like,
Oh, okay. And so if something doesn't work out today, God can like bend time to make
everything work out fine tomorrow and meet the deadline anyway, through some miraculous
way that I didn't even have to work at because I was completely at rest and he did it all.
So being that you're, you're, you're feeling under threat and you have got to realize and
choose that you really are ruling your life and you are not under threat.
And I don't need food or I didn't need it. So helpful. I think that, yeah, it was, I
was feeling under, under, under threat and whatever. And I realized, no, I choose me
because here's what it is that we're doing. We're trying to choose something that we value
to make ourselves feel good. Choose you choose that. You make yourself feel good more than
something else outside of you can. That's the damage is when we're giving power to something
outside of ourselves. And that is meaning that we're not believing God. If God says
that given us everything that we need, it means that, and we're saying, no, I need this
outside of me. God's like, no, that is subject to you. And so if you're believing that that
has more power than you do, in other words, it has something that you need, you're making
it more powerful. And God's like, then you're not believing me. Yeah. So that is not, that's
the opposite of faith. That is why it's a sin. It's not the action itself. It's a sin.
It's the reason why we're doing it. I'm doing it because I don't believe I am who God says
that I am. So you have to reposition yourself and reach his know who, who does God say that
I am? Then once you settle back into who it is that God says that you are now, what do
you want to do now that you are free will being again, who God has set up to rule your
domain and your kingdom? What do you choose as a good King that is learning to be, to
express and to live and to be the character of God? Now what do you choose? And then you'll
actually make a completely different decision, but now you'll do it because you feel like
this is what I choose because this is, so I'm now making a decision out of who I truly
am in Christ. Totally different. No law. I promise you, you will no longer want it.
You will no longer want it. All making sense now. Cause I think this is what's been going
on lately is because of that court case coming up, like first, like understanding, like all
the, like gathering all the information, blah, blah, blah. And now kind of just like waiting
for a date to come up. And it's like, that feels out of my control. And I've never been
in this position before. And, you know, so many emotions. Yeah. So I think, I think that's
why I'm responding like that or my soul and my body, you know, like especially my soul,
cause trying to control something that I can't control. But I just have to give that to God
as well and just be like, Hey, whatever outcome. Yeah. So that's where I have to figure out
how you forgive or bless or do, you know, to release God, to do whatever it is that he wants
to do and take myself out of the equation there too. And then not harming myself by.
Yeah. Yeah. Eating to gain control or protect myself. Yeah, exactly. And so, like I said,
we're usually choosing something like chocolate or whatever, because it's a, it's weird as it
sounds. There's some kind of a value in it for us. It's like, I want that. I want to have that.
But what I've had to learn to do instead is, is enjoy me. Yeah. So if I give myself me,
in other words, I put my, I remember who it is that I am. I thoroughly enjoy me. I don't know
about you. I really like myself, but I had to, because I love who God made me to be. And I love
the aspects of him that I get to live with 24 seven. And I love experiencing it. I love being
in connection with those parts of me. Cause it makes me really excited. I personally really
like it. Not everybody likes me and likes those parts of me, but I really like them.
And so I get to be with me all the time. So that's what I do usually in those situations,
instead of going for food is I'm looking for something to enjoy. So I choose myself.
I choose what I am and all of a sudden I reaccess that part of me that I like so much. I'm like,
Oh, okay. See, I'm good. I found something I enjoy. And then I, and then I usually will
express that part of myself either by creating or I will, um, or I'll dream or I'll like,
I don't know. Sometimes I'll watch a movie or book or, or, and, um, and usually it's something
productive. It's not something that like, like food or a movie isn't always productive.
It's usually something very productive because.
That is me being like my father, who's always creating, he's always, he's always putting
something he's always contributing instead of always consuming.
And so that, that, that naturally comes and I'm not trying to, it naturally comes when
I choose, if I'm trying to find something to enjoy, if I choose to enjoy myself, then
I find, then I naturally end up choosing things that are usually contributory.
Yeah.
Anyway.
Yeah.
Thank you.
So helpful.
Yeah.
Um, you had mentioned, um, also about, you know, your dad and all of that.
Yeah.
You can go back through and for one thing, yes, the devil can come back or the enemy
can come back and try to use us as staff and like claim that we haven't done it or whatever.
But that's why I'd prayed the prayer that he did to seal it.
He's like, absolutely not in order to tell heaven, no, it's done.
And accusations can't come against during.
You have all of the right heaven, because it's already been established to be able to
dispel stuff.
But if it's something that you feel just isn't quite resolved, because you're like, you know
what?
That's something I would like to give up.
I would like to whatever, um, it says my internet is unstable.
Can you hear me?
Yeah.
Okay.
Then, um, uh, if it's that, well, then I personally just take time to just release those things
and do the same thing, you know, what you, you were doing with Ed and just kind of like,
you know, say, Hey, you know, I took this out, put it in my hand, you know, because
that just kind of gives you an anchor for your soul to help you know what you're doing.
Um, uh, but it's not necessary.
It's just that we feel that if we do something like that, then we really are doing it as
opposed to hoping that we're doing it somewhere in there somewhere.
So now I begin to just, you know, I, I release this and I give it all up and I no longer
want it.
Um, and then, uh, and you're just declaring your, your ruling as a King and you're declaring
your authority to finalize something.
So me personally, if ever I come up with something that I've, what I've already gone through
with someone is, um, and I feel like, I don't know if that's, if that's still actually in
there.
And then I just go through the process.
I'm like, well, it doesn't really matter.
You know, I can just do it, but if I'm thinking, no, I've already done it, then I just, then
I just, um, you know, dismiss it.
And I rebuke, you know, the enemy or whatever, like, uh, I'm just letting you know, this
is what happened and, and by, and I expect it to be done.
I tell him I don't get all upset and act like it's a battle.
It's not a battle.
You're calling on heaven to reopen that scroll and to show it to him so that then he'll obey
that because he's hearing that authority and you don't have to worry about it.
I don't have to convince him of anything.
You're not trying to convince me of the law that's being created in heaven.
Um, and then, so, uh, before we, before we go, did you have any of these other questions
you wanted me to answer or no?
Um, yeah, there was just, um, I mean, one was just how I deal with the court case.
Like do I just like give it up?
Like how do I, um, how can I partner with God so that I don't have to worry about it
and just pretty much, is there anything I need to do so that there's no soul-ish things
that you know, like that can disturb the outcome?
Like you know what I mean?
I just want to be like, Hey, I've released this to God and whatever God wants to do is
what will happen.
Um, yeah, that was that.
And that the last question that was written there was just, uh, one of my friends, she
was like, I have so much authority of my words.
I'm like a prophet and if I declare things and they're bad, then that's going to ruin
other people's lives.
And I just didn't know what to say to that.
So I mean, that's, that was just a curiosity, but yeah.
Um, it, well, that absolutely Kim is, um, uh, can be true.
Absolutely.
And so I'm looking at that because she was so angry at a colleague that she's like, I
have to be dry.
She's like, I'm drinking a bottle of wine.
Cause I need to like sedate myself so that I don't speak curses over my colleagues.
Cause I don't want to harm them.
And I was like, I was like, I'm sure there's a better way to do that.
That's what I was thinking.
I was like, wow.
Um, but, um, so I do think that there's stuff that's a bit more productive, but, um, I,
uh, it, what, what she's saying in a manner of speaking is true because if you.
We say it in if, uh, there's a particular way in which we can talk about things
where we're trying to verbally process with someone because we need help.
Um, about, and bad things about this person.
And in other words, what it is that they did and how I feel about it.
And I'm just feeling like this and I'm whatever with that's not
going to cause harm in spirit.
It's very different though, when you're, when you are really upset and you are,
well, where we get curses or you're having an intention, an intentional.
Uh, how does it, basically where you have particular emotions that, uh, not
emotions, but, um, how, man, what would be the word for that?
Um, let me just say kind of an, uh, you have bad intentions towards someone.
Let's word it like that.
In other words, you have something within you really seriously towards
someone and, and it can, and it can flow towards them and damage them because
you you're basically in, in an emotional attacking mode, even if you don't
verbalize it emotionally, um, out and out flowing against them, you're
emotionally flowing against them.
If you verbalize that, or if you create too much intention in your heart of
like, this is what I want, and this is what I will, and this is that actually
can does have the authority to cause bad things to be, to send bad things to them.
It's based on our intention.
And then obviously verbalize that, that emotional intentional
energetic flow towards them.
Then that speaking that the curse.
So the issue, regardless of whether or not she verbalizes it, if there is an
intentional, emotional, negative flow towards someone, it's harm, it can harm
Yeah, because really do have that much authority.
So, but you can be upset, but I don't want that to be confusing with confused
with the fact that we can just be upset and not be emotionally sending
attacks towards someone.
Yeah.
You know, just it's emotional attacks that we're sending, maybe not even
verbal, maybe not even conscious, but if we are emotionally attacking them,
not emotionally, just dealing with what they said, but sending it.
That's there's, there's intention now that actually does have authority.
Okay.
Cause I was, I was thinking if you're really, really angry, is there a space
where you can be like, I mean, I'm having trouble accessing my anger, but at one
point maybe, but if you're really, really angry, angry, can you like spiel out to
God, like be really angry and then be covered.
So it's not harmful to other, but you still kind of get it out of your system.
Well, yeah, because within the current covering of the Lord, you can talk to
him, Hey Lord, this is how I feel.
This is whatever, but you're not directing it towards someone.
Okay.
So that's the diary intentional harm.
Even if it's subconscious, there's an intentional harm factor in there that
you're, that you're desiring that and that you're sending, that is a problem.
But if you're just, if you're just navigating your emotions and you're mad,
mad about somebody, or if you're mad at somebody that absolutely is not being
sent anywhere, you're, you're just.
Processing it all of that with the Lord.
Or you're like, God, I have this bad intention.
Can you remove it?
Like, I don't want it or like, yeah, yeah.
You can absolutely do that or whatever.
So, and by the way, by intention, you know, I am talking about actually
energetically sending a negative flow towards them, you know, that's what I'm
talking about, that's what can harm someone.
Having fear is poisonous to ourselves.
It's not damaging to someone else.
And that's what I thought I was like, but that needs to come out of us and
like, not to that person, but just like still out of us, those types of emotions
are the ones that I was saying, you know, it's good if you fully sit with
yourself, accepting, okay, this is how I feel again, you're not a group that
you're taking yourself to neutral because you stopped fighting it and thinking I
shouldn't feel like I'm mad because I feel this way or that you are, you know,
or that you're just feeding it, but instead you're just like, okay, I just
accept the fact that I am, I'm not judging it.
And I'm not saying that it shouldn't be like this and it
should be something different.
I'm just saying, well, this is, this is the way it is.
This is, this is reality right now.
Then it'll immediately diffuse the intensity and then you can take.
And then, and then you take up for the Lord and do the same thing with him, allow yourself
to be with him, feeling that way, and then see how he deals with it.
Meaning like not only correction, but the fact that the fact that you just feel safe
enough with him, experiencing the fact that you're safe enough with him, like, Oh my goodness,
he's not even correct to me.
Okay.
You know what, Laura, this really doesn't look like you because you're with him.
So you're sensing more of what he's like, Oh, this really doesn't look like you.
We're not really in alignment right now.
I'm like vibrating on a different frequency wave than you are, but it'll feel like, you
know, it's kind of like, we're not lining up.
I want to be more in line with you.
And then he'll help kind of like dispel the emotions.
You can give him the emotions as well.
He'll take them into himself.
This is what it'll kind of like picture it.
God uses different ways to picture it to different people, but basically he'll take it into himself
and it'll completely neutralize and not only neutralize, but it'll, I don't know, I don't
know if it disappears or if God redeems it and it changes into something else, but whatever
it is, it makes it into himself and it completely neutralizes it.
So you don't have to carry it anymore, but anyway, so yeah, that is true.
And then as far as you were talking about your, about the court case.
So one thing, just like the whole decision making about your job is don't feel threatened
by your, and, and be all worried about how it is that you're feeling and all my word,
I'm bitter and I shouldn't be bitter.
And I'm whatever, the more that you're at the, the more that you're focused on the fact
that you are feeling, you're experiencing certain things that you quote unquote shouldn't.
Yeah.
Like being scared of the outcome, like, Oh, will it be, yeah.
Will you fight for it?
You know what I mean?
Like I'm yeah.
I mean, like, cause we're like suing someone and I'm like, Ooh, that's like yucky.
And then part of me just wants to be like, Oh, I just want to forgive and move on and
let bygones be bygones and just like, but then there are so much values involved that
it's like, kind of like what you were saying with your court case.
I think God is dealing with other things, you know, but I'm like, and I also don't just
want to be like, Huh, it doesn't matter.
No, of course it matters.
It's like an inheritance thing, you know, but I also don't want to, yeah, I just really
want to leave it with God and be like, God, whatever, like it's, it's ultimately every,
like all of it is God's I'm God's, she's God's the money is God's like, I mean, yeah, correct.
So remember that what it is that you're doing is you are learning through this court case
about how to rule, how to rule in spirit.
And it, these are the types of things that are required of a King.
I'm not saying that we should all go out and sue everybody.
That's not what I'm saying.
I'm saying when we're in situations like this, it's actually teaching us to rule.
And so we're not, God wants to help us navigate it as a King, not simply, not simply escaping
it because, because of the responsibility that comes with navigating it.
So you can take advantage of this opportunity as God, as I believe that God wants you to
in in in learning how to responsibly rule in creation through a lawsuit and, and navigate
it spiritually and and, and the things that God will shift in you so that you'll be able
to, you'll be able to bless her, but understand that in suing someone, you're not condemning
them.
You're not condemning them spiritually.
You're not, that's not what you're doing here.
You're just like, Hey, look, justice needs to be brought.
Something needs to be, some evil needs to be brought to the light and it needs to be
dealt with.
And God, if he, I'm not trying to make this complicated, but you know, God has directed
y'all, you know, to do this.
If you feel like, feel like this is what we're supposed to do, then, then that's the premise
that I'm kind of like going at approaching this is it's like, okay, God, there are their
actions and reasons behind those actions that need to be brought to light, that need to
be brought to justice, that need to be dealt with.
And sometimes God uses creation.
In other words, the laws of the land and whatever to partner with him in bringing justice, but
justice is not condemning the person as an evil person or condemning heart, condemning
their spirit.
It's not the person it's justice.
us to the situation. Yeah. And there were terrible spiritual
destructive things that were done by her actions, terrible
things, twisted stuff like that. And so it was done. And so you
in this in the spirit, or, you know, and souls, you know,
through this spirit through this court case, can begin to bring
justice to those terrible destructive things that weren't
just done on earth, but were that then enter the spirit
realm, because of certain things that were certain decisions, you
know, that were, or then had particular consequences on
earth. And so you're, you're bringing, you're bringing
justice to that you're allowing, you know, you're allowing court
case system to be part of that process, God's God's using it,
y'all are using it. But you don't have to feel bad, as if,
oh, well, by suing someone, we're, we're like, villainizing
them, as a person, or removing their value, that we're
devaluing them, or that we're shaming them, or that we're
condemning them, no, but you are bringing their action, their
approach, their posture, to justice, you're trying to bring
order back to creation. As a ruling king, and you do, and you
want to do that, though, as much from the spirit, you want to do
that from the spirit realm, but you're using creation principles
such as like court case to be to partner with you in it. But it's
not the court case that will bring justice. It's God, you're
bringing kingdom of God into this situation, so that his
principles will overrule, maybe even the natural way that the
court goes, because it's the kingdom of God that needs to
undo and bring justice to all of the spiritual destruction that
was done anyway, let alone any destruction that was done in the
physical realm. Yeah. So that's all you're doing is you're just
allow yourself to be a catalyst of, of, of bringing in the
kingdom of God, while and so that God can deal with the
situation into it so that he can give him the authority to
because the because, because the, the thing was done against
you. So you're the one who has the authority to bring in to to
give the authority to the principles that you agree with,
that have the higher power and the final say, that's the
position that you are holding is you are choosing, okay, you're
the gateway between heaven and earth. So you're opening the
gate. Yeah, you bring it in. So you don't have to feel guilty
about any of that. You know, you're not, you're not
villainizing or you're not saying she's evil. You're not
like declaring something about her. You know, you're just
allowing God to come in and to bring his justice. But if she
had done it to someone else, that's not a Christian, they
wouldn't be bringing in the kingdom of God. And so you have
the opportunity to actually make this for to bring restoration to
her soul. Yeah, restoration to her because you're bringing in
the kingdom of God. Yeah.
Yeah, it's so helpful. It's just that because I think it's been
like, and it's still draining me. That's what I feel like.
It's like, oh, it's like, not not not at the top of my mind.
But just like, you know, it's kind of like a leaking faucet,
you know, where it's like, it's dripping. It feels like God's
dripping all the time, you know, and it's like,
yeah, it's, it's not fun as much as you can. Every especially
before you go to bed, but really, you know, every time you
discuss the court case or whatever. And you'll eventually
do this to the point where you won't have to actually go
through this whole process, but kind of like, at least initially
begin to intentionally cut yourself away from the court
case, like in the spirit, like, okay, we discussed it, we
whatever, okay, anything, anything, evil, Lord, anything
gross, anything that is like trying to inspires are trying to
grab ahold of me and hold on to me. And like, that's making you
feel like there's always like this sludge subconscious sludge
that you're going through. You're not thinking about it.
There's this subconscious. Yeah, like that bill is is affecting
your life. It's cut away from that. Like, just like, okay, I'm
you know, Lord, you know, free me from and I'm and I'm choosing
Lord to cut away from cut any like ties or any like fingers or
whatever that I've tried to like leech on to me after having
discussed it. I'm cutting all of those off of me. Nothing
controls me nothing manipulates me nothing corrupts me nothing is
affecting me and Lord you're, you're freeing me and Lord, you know, I'm releasing, you know,
all of this to you. Like, for instance, when we do, um, The way I learned that was, um, uh, in
this, uh, training, you know, that Ed has done for the, for, in, for inner healing or whatever,
when you pray with people, um, you, they, they recommend after the person leaves, like say,
for instance, if you're like in a room with them and, you know, you've talked to them or whatever,
um, that once they leave, one of the things that you do is you cut yourself off. Yeah. Because
what it is that they talked about, because you're their safe place to talk about stuff.
So they talk about all of this stuff. And so you really do have to have to remove the connection.
You're not saying that you're not going to be connected, you know, to the person as a,
as a person, friends pay, pray for each other and all that you're cutting yourself off from
everything. It is that this person was dealing with it. They got freed from, you don't want to
have any kind of connection to it either. So you cut that off. So, um, and it's just a, and it
really, really works, really works. So, uh, so anyway, that kind of thing, I think might be
the sledge, the Laura's thing. And then you just cut things off. And every time that y'all talk
about something or whatever, Hey, Lord, I'm declaring that I'm removing myself. I'm taking
the permission, not just the permission, but I'm taking up the authority that you gave me
to free myself. I am taking advantage that I'm using that tool, so to speak. And I'm now
severing myself. You gave me that ability. I'm not doing it outside of your ability.
You gave me that ability. And now Lord, that's the tool you gave me this, this saw, or you gave me
this knife. You're the one who gave it to me. I'm now taking this, this was bought for me by the
blood of Christ. And that's the thing I'm choosing my own intentional free will. I'm deciding that
that's what I'm doing. Again, this is not wishful thinking. This is not, Oh, I hope this is working.
I hope I'm using the right spiritual warfare tactic. No, you're making a decision. God gave
you the knife. Now he's like, how do you want to use it? Like, okay, I gave you permission to cut
these things off. Is that what you choose to do? Yes. I choose to do that. So cut it off.
Just the fact that you decided that you're going to do it. That's what cuts it off.
It's your authority that did it. You were given it by God, but it's your authority that did it.
So in other words, you don't have to worry that, Oh, this is wishful thinking. I hope this works.
If you decide it and you do it, it's done. So you know that in a manner of speaking,
is a weirder word as it is to use in this situation, you have that control,
you have the control to remove yourself. It was given to you by God only in his power
covered by his blood. And you have the opportunity to choose to receive that,
which he's given you instead of resisting that, which he's given you or not taking advantage of
the gift that he's given you. He gave it, it all originated from him. This isn't you working
autonomously and deciding this is what you want to do. You get to decide if you want to take up
the knife and cut it. So you can know if you decide it, that it's done and you don't have to
worry about, Oh, well, what is it about being accused? Or like, in other words, if you do all
of that and a few minutes later, you know, you're still pulling the sledge. You're like, absolutely
not. I've already done that. It's done. You don't have to worry. Oh my word. What if I didn't do it?
No, you decide. No, I did. And it will go away. Okay. Yeah. Anyway, is that helpful?
Oh my gosh. This is yeah. Transformational.
That was amazing. Yeah. I think we answered all the questions. Oh my goodness. Yes. Above and
beyond. I'll be listening to this over and over. Yeah. And I think I had just like with the whole
body thing, I think I had just forgotten that there was a soul in there as well. So that was
super helpful. Yeah. That's the one that makes, that's basically what I think of as the aspect
of you. That's making a decision about whether it's going to believe God or not. It's do I open
the trap door or do I leave it closed? Yeah. Because spirit already is it's your decision to
come into agreement with it and bring it down. It depends on who you talk to, but some people say
that your spirit, your mind, and your, sorry, your spirit, your soul, and your body all have a
will. I'll have a mind and all have a heart. I don't know if that's true or not, but it makes
sense, at least in certain situations. I'm like, no, that makes sense. So anyway, if you kind of
think of it a bit, that's not too complicated. The point is think of the soul as kind of the
decision-making aspect of wondering of choosing whether or not your flesh is going to come into
alignment with the spirit and allow itself to be transformed.
into spirit. So anyway, yeah. Okay. Thank you so much. Oh my
goodness.
You're welcome. I love your sweater.
You look really cute. I do too. I've had it for a while. And I
keep thinking about, well, maybe I need, I need to get rid of it.
Maybe I've had it a long time.
No, I really like it.
No, it looks so good. Yeah, don't get rid of it.
Keep it.
Right. Okay, official. It's official decision though.
Yeah.
Yeah, thank you. You too. Or it's probably daytime there. But
yeah,
yes, it is 239, which is later than I thought that it was. But
anyway, well, it's not later than I knew it was, but it's,
it's later than it feels like it is. Yeah. All right. Well, I
will talk to you later.
Thank you so much. Will there be like a continuing of the rest
in terms of thing or it's like, no.
And so what I'm planning to do, I'm still in the works, but I
it's, I think you're probably the first person who's heard
this. I am looking to do a three day challenge, April 4, 5, and
six in but it's in the evening. So it's like 90 minute, I think
60 to 90 minutes each night. I haven't announced it or anything
yet. I'm still working on the details. And then going to do
plan to do a three day live virtual event. Friday, Saturday
and Sunday, the weekend after Easter, which I don't know what
those days are. Is that like the 13th, 14th and 15th or something
like that? Anyway, that's what I'm looking to do. And then
potentially doing a another rest intensive. And on the back of
internship after that.
Amazing. I'm so excited for it.
Yes. Yeah. I'm going to Spain.
Friday, next Friday, not tomorrow. Yeah. Oh, cuz y'all
are gonna be there for Easter, right? No, we're Yeah, before
Easter. We were there from Friday to Wednesday. Okay. Okay.
And then Easter kind of starts on the first day here. So yeah,
then I'll come back and go to the cabin. I think Renata was
texting me too. So I think she's been looking at a different
hotel or something. I just saw she sent over a picture and then
like, she recorded something so
good. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Well, y'all have been I hope to
get to a picture too. Yeah. All right. Well, have a good night.
Love you too. Thank you so much. You're welcome. Thank you. Bye.