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Hey, everybody. I had to laugh because I actually already made a journey share video, but I

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had not finished the sixth video. I was about 20 minutes left. And then I went on a short

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walk and listened to about 10 more minutes. And I'll just sharing with you is that before

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that 10 minutes, I was just kind of in anxiety and worry and I'm not really sure how to get

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out of it. And then Ashley talked about stopping trying to just stop trying to stop trying.

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And it was so simple. It just made me laugh that it was something so simple that just

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made me my whole body, spirit and soul was just like went to went into peace. And so

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just the power of stop trying. And for some reason that is more powerful for me than letting

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than saying letting go. Stop trying. I'm always trying. I love knowledge. I love to know and

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right now with this journey with cancer living in my physical body on this earth, trying

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to figure out how to come to alignment with the spirit. And I think we'll learn more about

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that in Ashley's last teaching. But I've just like today I was like, how am I ever going

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to get there? You know, I, you know, before I had cancer, I thought, you know, I could

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just think and it would be gone. Or, you know, there's so many documentaries and, and,

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and such about people healing themselves with their thoughts. And like Ashley talked about,

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that's just, that's one of the lots, you know, you choose that and God gives it to you. And

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I'm like, gosh, I'm never going to get there. Because I'm not I can't, I'm having such a

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hard time believing. Apparently, I'm having such a hard time believing these things. Because

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I go into doubt. And then I go into what else do I need to be doing? Do I need to change

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into this diet? Do I need to go to this kind of doctor? But just stop trying was just simple

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enough to just allow me just go into peace in this moment. And for the time being, that's good

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enough. And I guess my my question that I have is like seeking out I'm trying to remember what

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Ashley talked about, about the whole the with along with stop trying. She was talking about

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gosh, like, searching out I have to go back and listen to it searching out knowledge like, okay,

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what, like right now, I'm having surgery on Monday for to get the cancer removed. And the

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hope is that all the cancer will be removed with that surgery. The hope is that there will be no

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cancer in the lymph nodes. And if that's the case, the doctors will consider me. Well, as the

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radiologist said, he would consider me cured. And I was like, Whoa, no doctors ever told me that. So

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that brought me hope. But the sad part was that why did I need that doctor to tell me that to feel

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hopeful, when I know what God's Word says. So I'm still like battling that. And I think that will, I

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trust now that that's going to work itself out, I'm assuming as I listen to the next teaching. But

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then my question would be, like after this surgery, my naturopathic doctor talked about going, going

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through another, an alternative oncologist, who does a lot of different follow up stuff, and blood

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work and tracking to see where my metabolic functioning is and diet and just doing all just

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making sure that everything is in alignment. And obviously, I'm going to need to keep taking care of

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myself with reduced stress, sleep, eating well. So I'm, I'm like battling like, well, do I need that

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doctor? Because if I'm trusting in God, and I'm resting in Him, He's going to take care of all of

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it. Right. And I don't need

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need that doctor. Right? Only the sick need a physician. And if I'm not sick, I don't

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need one. And so I'm like, how do we live this out? Like, how does this work? Because

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I would like to just like forget about it. Like, I don't need to go to any more doctors.

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I'm good. But then my body's like my flesh is like, that's not very smart. Um, so that

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is kind of my question, I guess, and part of my journey share. So all right, well, I'm

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not going to bore you with my other video because just didn't need any of that. So I

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will see you guys tonight. Bye bye.