Hey, everybody. I had to laugh because I actually already made a journey share video, but I
had not finished the sixth video. I was about 20 minutes left. And then I went on a short
walk and listened to about 10 more minutes. And I'll just sharing with you is that before
that 10 minutes, I was just kind of in anxiety and worry and I'm not really sure how to get
out of it. And then Ashley talked about stopping trying to just stop trying to stop trying.
And it was so simple. It just made me laugh that it was something so simple that just
made me my whole body, spirit and soul was just like went to went into peace. And so
just the power of stop trying. And for some reason that is more powerful for me than letting
than saying letting go. Stop trying. I'm always trying. I love knowledge. I love to know and
right now with this journey with cancer living in my physical body on this earth, trying
to figure out how to come to alignment with the spirit. And I think we'll learn more about
that in Ashley's last teaching. But I've just like today I was like, how am I ever going
to get there? You know, I, you know, before I had cancer, I thought, you know, I could
just think and it would be gone. Or, you know, there's so many documentaries and, and,
and such about people healing themselves with their thoughts. And like Ashley talked about,
that's just, that's one of the lots, you know, you choose that and God gives it to you. And
I'm like, gosh, I'm never going to get there. Because I'm not I can't, I'm having such a
hard time believing. Apparently, I'm having such a hard time believing these things. Because
I go into doubt. And then I go into what else do I need to be doing? Do I need to change
into this diet? Do I need to go to this kind of doctor? But just stop trying was just simple
enough to just allow me just go into peace in this moment. And for the time being, that's good
enough. And I guess my my question that I have is like seeking out I'm trying to remember what
Ashley talked about, about the whole the with along with stop trying. She was talking about
gosh, like, searching out I have to go back and listen to it searching out knowledge like, okay,
what, like right now, I'm having surgery on Monday for to get the cancer removed. And the
hope is that all the cancer will be removed with that surgery. The hope is that there will be no
cancer in the lymph nodes. And if that's the case, the doctors will consider me. Well, as the
radiologist said, he would consider me cured. And I was like, Whoa, no doctors ever told me that. So
that brought me hope. But the sad part was that why did I need that doctor to tell me that to feel
hopeful, when I know what God's Word says. So I'm still like battling that. And I think that will, I
trust now that that's going to work itself out, I'm assuming as I listen to the next teaching. But
then my question would be, like after this surgery, my naturopathic doctor talked about going, going
through another, an alternative oncologist, who does a lot of different follow up stuff, and blood
work and tracking to see where my metabolic functioning is and diet and just doing all just
making sure that everything is in alignment. And obviously, I'm going to need to keep taking care of
myself with reduced stress, sleep, eating well. So I'm, I'm like battling like, well, do I need that
doctor? Because if I'm trusting in God, and I'm resting in Him, He's going to take care of all of
it. Right. And I don't need
need that doctor. Right? Only the sick need a physician. And if I'm not sick, I don't
need one. And so I'm like, how do we live this out? Like, how does this work? Because
I would like to just like forget about it. Like, I don't need to go to any more doctors.
I'm good. But then my body's like my flesh is like, that's not very smart. Um, so that
is kind of my question, I guess, and part of my journey share. So all right, well, I'm
not going to bore you with my other video because just didn't need any of that. So I
will see you guys tonight. Bye bye.