Good morning, hello, good to see you, just see you too.
Is it getting cold in Texas?
Yes, it is.
First time I see you with a shirt, I think.
It's like summer over there because you're always in a t-shirt and it looks so warm.
Yeah, well actually I am in South Carolina now, so it's colder up here.
All right.
Earlier, you know.
Yeah.
And so the other day it was below freezing and that just felt weird to me at the beginning of November
because in Texas it doesn't usually get below freezing for, I don't know, a while.
Not until at least December, but usually we don't really get, our coldest month can be like March.
I mean it's just weird.
So anyway, but we almost match today.
Yeah, I think we do almost the same color.
Yeah.
I hear it's getting, well, I don't know what it is in Fahrenheit, but in Celsius it's about 10 degrees.
Okay, all right.
What that is in Fahrenheit.
Yeah, I don't ever remember.
I'm not really good at converting.
It's about 10 above freezing.
Oh, that's right, that's right, because zero is freezing.
That's right.
Okay, well.
In Fahrenheit, freezing is not at zero.
No, freezing is 32.
32, yeah, so then maybe it would be 50.
Yeah, right now it's, oh really, wow, you're warmer than we are, if that's true, because we're 45 today.
And we have a very high chance of rain.
So anyway, it's kind of dreary outside, but I like days like that because as long as there's not too many of them,
I like days like that because they're cozy.
Yeah, it is.
It is nice.
Unless you have to be out in them, and then it's not fun at all.
And you can stay inside.
I think I got all of my errands that I needed to run done, and so I could just, I think I even have, in fact I do, I have, I'm so stocked up from the grocery store that I'm good, so I'm very grateful for that.
How are you? You've really had a week.
Yeah, I'm doing good, and in the same way, I feel like I'm in the middle of a washing machine, that you're being around and there's so many things going on, and I think I'm excited, and then I'm walking in it, and then I get uncertain and insecure and doubt.
Is it really happening anything, or the areas where I'm not feeling victory or walking in peace, and all these things that happened this week with rejection.
So, and I also started to share it with people.
Oh, exciting!
Yes, I started to share, and yesterday, I was in a, I was in a women's group in church, and they asked me to share, and then I shared quite a bit of it and I think it just fills me with a lot of doubt.
And I don't know, so if maybe you're how you felt when you started to share what was going on.
My goodness, I didn't share things for, well, that the rest thing and whatever I did not share for a long time.
Well, I say that it's really hard to explain what happened because what happened is I had been living this way for, or God had been teaching me about rest for years, but I didn't know that's what it was.
And I was getting the benefits of rest. Again, this is years ago, I was getting all the benefits of rest, but I was doing it in strife, because what he was doing is he was, in other words, a lot of hard work, but I was getting the results, as if I was in rest.
And the reason for that was God was trying to show me what happens when you operate according to kingdom principles.
And so like a child, he was just kind of like letting me benefit simply by working hard and obeying him. That's what I mean by working hard, by obeying him.
And yeah, I was having faith in him, but it was all from a lot of effort.
And so I knew that really well.
I just didn't know how to do it from peace and from rest.
And from the fact that he's already taken care of it and I don't have to work for
it, I can get those results just simply by being a son of God.
That was what he had to teach me.
So basically the thing is that I kept working and in getting these amazing
results as if I was in rest, but I wasn't just simply because God was showing me
how, uh, uh, helping me like introduce me to it.
And then all of a sudden, because he wanted me to learn how to do it from a
place of rest and then get those results, he allowed all those things to stop
working so, so that I would learn to approach it from a different rest.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Because like, I think I have, I'm trying, I have been, I think you're saying the
same thing that my wording has been walking in faith, but yeah, but maybe
walking in pay in faith in a, from a place of stress, that's my wording.
Correct.
I have like a lot of amazing results in my own life and other people's lives
and what I call like walking in faith.
But I think in sometimes in a place from stress, now I'm trying to
distinguish the differences and I'm in the middle of it and some things is
working and some is not, and sometimes I feel like, oh, I'm in rest, but then
I'm actually striving to get a result from a place of stress, but I'm doing the
same principles, so I'm just trying to figure out what is what, and maybe it's
too soon to start sharing because I don't really, I haven't come through it.
And I don't feel like I actually a hundred percent know what's going on.
And I feel it's a very, like I told you before, I feel it's very vulnerable.
It's very fragile as if it could break if I just say it in the wrong way and
sharing it in on a women's group, I'm just wondering, then I was filled with a
lot of doubt what is actually going on and it's actually something happening.
And there are definitely things that I don't feel I'm walking in faith and rest.
And I do struggle with a lot of things like this rejection when this
happened and the class rejected me.
And so then I think I've become kind of, and I think it is my fallback is to
understand because I value knowledge, you know, the tree of the knowledge of the
good and evil, that's like, so me, I always need knowledge.
I think it's a way of controlling things.
So I fall back on that.
And now when I can't control it and I don't know what is what, it feels like
being in a washing machine or just tumbling around and that makes me really
insecure and feeling like it's fragile.
And when I'm sharing, I'm like, it's actually, I don't even know.
So maybe it's too soon to start sharing when I'm not confident in it.
And in the same time, I really want to pass on what I feel God is doing in me
because I noticed that there are things going on.
Yeah.
I know.
Well, when things are happening, you know, we get excited and we share some
things and there were things that when I was pretty new, I wasn't, yeah, I was
pretty new, um, like within the first few months, there were certain things that I
was sharing, um, but like only like with my best friend or something like that.
And because it was so new, it, I felt fragile in it and I knew I needed to
strengthen that in my own relationship with the Lord.
Um, and, uh, so anyway, but I found someone that I could, that I could share
it and my brother and sister-in-law that I could share things with that could
just let me verbalize and express things without, without, um, You know, and
just accept me in the middle of my journey without trying to convince me of
like, oh, without like debating me or arguing with me about whether or not it
was right, just rather just let me just be a safe place for me to just kind of
verbalize when I'm in the middle of a journey.
And so that helps me.
So, and, but yeah, a lot of people do that, you know, when they're first
learning about rest, they get so excited and, you know, to share it with other
people and, you know, and, and, you know, and I don't think that there's anything
wrong with that, um, that you, that what is challenging though, what I do
recommend is that they don't go too deep into it just simply because for, for.
what you mentioned, you know, it can feel so fragile that, that,
you know, it can, you're, you're just, you're still in the
middle, you're still in the middle of it. And you're just
trying to allow it the time to solidify. And so Lord, what is
this? And that kind of thing. But, but, and that's just based
on my own experience, the fact that when God begins to reveal
things to us that are so new, we're just trying to, yeah, and
so deep, we're just, we're just so young in it that can, if we,
anyway, so I don't know that I'm really explaining this very
well. But yeah,
you do. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I think, okay, you've gone
through, it's just good to hear that you're also that just this
feeling of fragileness and newness, and kind of a little
bit confused. And what is what, because it's not like I didn't
live in rest at all before. And it's not like I have faith. But
this is just something new still. But what is that? If I've
still if I have lived in peace, I have walked in faith. Yeah.
Why is this different than what is different? Yes. Yeah. And
it's like such a deep process for me. It's, I mentioned it
before several times that it's, it's actually, it's like really,
really deep loss of hope in a way and also going through so
much sickness. Yeah, that I can't that only I don't have, I
don't even have words to the trauma I've been through. And
kind of just thinking that I'm gonna obviously God has given
me freedom, and it's this much. And the rest of it is just life
because I've been through what I've been through. And then that
God goes all the way down to all the pain over 20 years, and just
like starts speaking hope into it. Yeah, areas that I didn't
even know there was hope or I lost hope. Or I thought, this is
just like living in the world. As a Christian, it's there's the
way it has to be that are just you and so ingrained in you. And
you don't even know that the devil stole it from you. Yeah,
until your God is saying maybe there's a different way to live.
So it's like so deep that I can't even, it's hard to even
express what's going on. Yeah. But it's good to hear. Just you
saying that you're also have been in the middle of it. And
again, fragile and confusing. Oh, yeah. I mean, I just I feel
that way, whenever the Lord is pushing deeper in it. So I can,
I've been walking this for a while. And I'm telling you,
when he starts pushing into a deeper level, and by pushing, I
mean, inviting, or I can believe him in faith in a deeper level
than I have been, that place feels fragile, because that
place is new for me, to believe him to that degree is new for
me, you know, to have faith in him, and rely on him as my
protection and provision and not on myself, is is so new to me
that it's very fragile. And those areas, I don't share with
people for a while. I don't share with people until I get
more solid in it, like very solid in it. And if I do share,
it's with someone like, I don't know, like my best friend or
whatever, because my best friend happens to be someone that I can
share things with. And she doesn't challenge me on it. She
just lets me like talk about just like, who she who I am and
just be able to like verbalize things so that she can just kind
of hear my heart. So she's just there to be able to hear my
heart without like, like I said, without like trying to challenge
me on it, she knows I'm in the middle of a process, you know,
and so I'll share it with her, but I don't share it with, with
other people. I don't share it in the rest intensive. I don't,
you know, I just, in fact, one of the things that I'm learning
is how to share those things with my husband now, because I'm
so used to not sharing things with people while I'm in
process. I'm used to waiting until until I'm more solid in
it, and I have a solid footing. But there are certain people
that you can it and but only but anyway, it's so precious.
And like you said, it feels so fragile between you and the Lord
for a while. I wait until it's until I'm solid in it until I
share it simply to protect this little young seedling, you know,
like like a little a little tree.
You're whatever, like this tiny little bitty plant, you know, that's just popped up.
It's just so new that it just means a lot of love and care and protection.
It's not strong enough to withstand any.
Any like challenges, people's opinions and thoughts and challenges.
And like you're saying, correct.
So God shared it too soon.
I, yeah, so God can challenge it.
And you know, if there's anything that we're worried about, about whether or
not something is godly or not godly, well, then we can run things by people,
you know, to make sure that we're not like, um, you know, believing
something that's not of God.
But, uh, but if it's just something that we're like, no, this is of God.
I just am trying to figure out how to do it and try to figure out, you know, well,
then those are things that, you know, just like really protect.
And I just, cause I'm pursuing them specifically with the Lord, you know,
and they're just like real young and like you, like we keep saying real fragile.
So in fact, there was a time last year where I was believing the Lord for, um,
some things meaning like, I was just, I was trying to learn who it is that he was
and that he would take care of me, et cetera.
And he, uh, but then I ran out of money and I wasn't seeing more money come in.
And I told God, I said, I said, God, I don't, um, I don't know what's wrong.
I said, but I feel like I had something very precious and fragile.
And that's what I, that's how I worded it to him.
I said, I felt like I had something very precious and fragile and I
broke it and I don't know how, I don't know what I did, you know?
And so anyway, he walked me through all of that, but, um, anyway, but yeah,
I've used that word before with the Lord, Lord, Lord, you know, this was just so
new and I was, and, and I felt like it was going great and then all of a sudden
it fell apart and I don't know how, you know, so stuff like that, you know, I
just kind of only shared with people that because it wasn't whether or not it was
godly that I was particularly questioning.
It was just kind of like, I mean, it kind of was because it was just like,
You know, I don't know.
Can you believe God to this degree?
Does he say that this is right to trust him for these kinds of things?
You know, that kind of thing I was questioning, but it wasn't like I was
like following Satan or believe some like, like doctrine or something.
So it wasn't like that, but there wasn't an aspect of like, is when God's saying
to believe him or when God's, is this what God's trying to teach me?
That's what I was questioning.
Is this what he's trying to teach me?
And, um, and, and I'm just kind of like wobbling in it.
And, and I felt like, like I fell down, you know, and then I, and I didn't know
how I've, how I messed up and how I fell down.
So anyway, the Lord picked me back up and walked me through things and had to walk
me actually through some personal healing with him because I kind of felt.
Betrayed.
I felt like he'd left me unprotected.
So he had to kind of walk me through all of that.
And anyway, I'm stronger because of it.
And I'm just like, okay, so this is, this is part of just, so during that time, I
just chose to not abandon the Lord.
I just chose, no, I'm going to, I'm, I don't fully understand this, but
I'm not going to abandon God.
I'm not going to meaning like, even emotionally, I'm not going to, I'm
struggling, but I'm not going to hold this against God, you know?
And I'm just going to allow him to like heal me and, and, and help me walk through
this time where I need to have faith that he really is safe because I'm not
feeling right now that he's safe, you know?
So anyway, so I had to walk through that, but anyway, so just as, just as some
encouragement of like, when that I still go through those things where things feel
fragile, but it's, it's in the areas where I'm stretching that are new, new
with faith and they're deeper in faith.
And I haven't gone there before and I haven't believed in that much.
You know, I haven't had faith to him, faith in him that to that degree yet.
And so that's really new for me that feels fragile and those I, I keep to
myself while I'm processing it.
Cause I feel that if I don't, I'll be.
Um, I didn't know that other people won't treat it with care and it just
needs time to like grow and develop.
But then there are other people that I share certain things with, or I'll share
like certain very basic things with, you know, that are controversial or they
wouldn't like challenge me on or something like that, you know, you can
share those things cause that's what we do when we get excited about things.
You just share them with the right people.
So, yeah.
So how has everything worked out with your, with your class?
I know the last message that you wrote, you said the next day, you know, you
talked to them and, um, you know, just kind of like how to come to Jesus
meeting and said, this is unacceptable.
You're not going to do this again and stuff, but that's all that I heard.
I haven't met them again.
I have them tomorrow.
I have class with them tomorrow, but I, I think it was the right
decision just to, because I tried to go into peace and rest and I couldn't.
And then I just said, like, you know, this God, you know, I can't find peace
anywhere and I don't know what to do.
And I'm too overwhelmed to make a decision.
But the only thing I can think of too, is to feel protected because
when I'm so rejected, I feel really unsafe and I can't be in a
classroom feeling this unsafe.
And I think it was good.
And also I talked to another teacher about it and she talked to the
pupils and I set boundaries and I think I felt like they responded well to it.
They understood like, okay, we crossed the boundary.
Yeah.
I could feel that they almost had like some kind of almost remorse.
They regret it.
They felt that's great.
So even though, and afterwards I thought, well, I don't know if that
was in the spirit or not, but this is where I was at and this is the
thing that I had and it worked out fine.
So maybe I don't even have to know.
But I think that it was really interesting for me to see those things
happening in two days in a row that I was rejected so badly.
And with my friend, we've had to sit down several times and talk and pray.
And what's coming up is that it is deeper rejection issues in me.
Like one of the thing is like, she did wrong.
She, she rejected me and she didn't explain what was going on.
So what she did wasn't good, wasn't right.
And it left me really stressed.
But I think that if I didn't have rejection issues, I
might not have been so hurt.
Yeah.
Yes.
I think I would have been more like, oh, that's interesting.
I need to ask her what's going on, or maybe I'll give her a day or two and
then I'll ask her again, and I wouldn't take it so personal, but the more that
we are talking and digging into it, it's, it's becoming clear that it is my
rejection issues that's making it worse.
Even though she says she's really.
Sorry, because she did.
Yeah. Which is sweet.
Yeah.
I bet.
It sounds like, first of all, going back to what you're talking about, the
classroom sounds like you did a great job because you, you know, you just try
because that is a very challenging situation, period, let alone the fact
that it happened right after, you know, you were already, your, your sensitivity
was heightened because of what happened the previous day.
So it's just kind of like, okay, we just hit a threshold, you know, across it.
And then, so what you did is you just did what you could.
You're like, okay, let's see if I can choose and go where my spirit finds
peace and you figured out you couldn't, because you said you couldn't get, you
couldn't get rest, you couldn't get peace.
And so you just declared that what God said was true about himself and that you
really were safe, that he really was protecting you, but you couldn't choose
it enough to actually act on it.
So you went where your soul found peace because that's just where you were.
That's just all you understood and knew this far.
And so that was great.
That's great.
So, and cause it's, and then it's important to have compassion for yourself
during that and, and just allow yourself to be where it is that you are on the
journey, then you will shift faster and these things won't affect you as deeply.
Like, you know, you'll, you'll grow, you'll mature out of this faster.
And what I mean by mature is if mature and faith in God, that you really are
protected, he really is providing for you as opposed to what it feels like when you
go through those situations that you can believe that you're not abandoned, even
though the situations might still happen.
Like as periodically, those things are going to happen.
They just do.
They happen in your life.
They happen in my life.
They just happen.
But are we going to go through it in rest, believing that we're not threatened or are
we going to believe that we're threatened?
And so the more compassion that you have for yourself, the more that you just
really have no shame and no condemnation for you being where you are and for in
the journey and for.
for you making the decision that you did,
which was just the best that you knew how to do.
Because remember, this thing that God's calling us to,
we've never done that before.
So he's teaching us how to go somewhere
that we've never been.
So he knows that.
And so he's very compassionate and kind
of allowing us to take our time
in getting to this other place
and like learning how to do it.
Because all we've ever known was the other.
And all that the world teaches us is the other.
So he knows that we're on this journey
to try of moving in that direction.
So the more that we just relax along the journey
and just have no shame and no condemnation
for being where it is that we are
and just doing our best and choosing that
and declaring that he is who he says that he is,
and then going where our soul finds peace
and believing God and thanking God,
thank you, Lord, for giving me this as a solution
that I could provide for and protect myself.
I know that you want me to believe
and to give to you my provision and protection.
But because I don't know how to do that yet
because I'm not there yet,
thank you for giving me an opportunity
to provide for and protect myself
by utilizing these options.
So I received this as you being who you've said
that you are, good protector, provider, et cetera.
So you, and then again, no shame, no condemnation.
In other words, that that doesn't change
who it is that you are.
And then you will have faith in him faster.
You will believe that he's protector and provider faster
so that when those situations come up,
you can finally choose him
and then go where your spirit finds peace
and maybe your spirit will have you in the future
handle the situation very different.
See, I have no idea what the situation is and whatever.
So I'm just talking in principle.
So anyway, my point is like, I think that you did great.
You did super.
And so anyway, you'll shift faster and have faith more
and more quickly if you just,
if you relax and allow yourself to be where you are.
It's kind of, and that's a horrible comparison,
but it's like the fact that a drunk person
is usually the person that survives car crashes
because they're so relaxed.
While people who aren't drunk that are,
that have you ever noticed that,
that when a drunk person causes the car crash,
it's usually, and people think it's so unfair,
it's usually the drunk person that survives
and they're the instigator.
And it's because their body is so relaxed
that they don't fight the impact.
So it's the same way with this,
that if you don't fight it and fight the process
and fight where it is that you are
and just allow yourself to be there,
but are always looking towards hope
and always trying to increase your faith
and what it is that you're choosing God to be,
then you'll mature faster.
Because I think it's hard for me to accept
that I sometimes, and you've said this in your teaching too,
that some areas I'm five-year-old.
Yeah, correct.
I think with this, it's kind of hard to accept for me
that I'm learning this so late in life.
Yeah, but we all have to say that.
And that I'm so immature in some areas
and that I'm so affected by rejection.
So in a way it's hard to kind of accept where I'm at.
Yeah, so that's what I'm saying,
is you have to relax and receive no shame
and no condemnation for being where you are,
because think about it.
See, we villainize, so to speak, being five,
because we're like, I shouldn't be five.
Well, why not?
It's just where you are.
There's nothing wrong with a five-year-old being five.
It's good for a five-year-old to be five.
He's not expected to be 35 yet.
He doesn't know how to do a budget.
He doesn't know how to go to work.
He doesn't know how to interact in difficult,
challenging, I don't know,
spiritual or professional situations.
We allow him to be five and don't ridicule him for it
or think badly about him for it.
We just allow him to be that.
And so it's the same thing.
for ourselves last winter. We just allow him to be that for
ourselves for, you know, we allow him to be that for
himself. Because God says that him being that he created the
five year old to be he created five years old to be at a
particular stage. So it's important for a five year old to
go through the five year old stage in order to strengthen and
then move to be six, and then to strengthen and move to be
seven. Because and if a five year old doesn't fully develop
as a five year old and learn everything he's supposed to
learn, and go through the development process that he that
a five year old supposed to, well, then he's going to have
development gaps, and he's going to suffer for it as he gets
older. So it's the same thing like so for instance, like say
say that, in say that you're five in that area, and I've got
my areas in which I'm five, and I just make it five. The reason
I make it five years old, as opposed to something else is for
two reasons. One, it's the example that my brother used
with me one time, where he just said, Ashley, if you're five,
just be five. Like, okay. But the and then the other thing is,
it's an easy age for us to kind of like connect with of, of it
being very different than being an adult. And it just it being
able to play and stuff like that. It's harder for us to
kind of like connect with something like, oh, it's okay to
be, you know, to be 15 years old, and to be that particular
age of the process, there's something about when you grab,
if you pick a younger age, people can kind of get this
principle and this concept easier. So it's not like we
really are five. And we're really that young, you know, in
that area of our life. But I just use that as an example to
make a point. But anyway, so so for five years old, it's God
created particular things to happen when we're five. And it's
important for us to allow ourselves to go through, like I
said, the development process that he baked into being five.
And if we don't, then we're gonna then we're gonna suffer
for it later. And we're gonna have to go back and revisit it,
which is what has happened, that when we were five, there were
certain things that were supposed to have developed in us
that we just missed, maybe we were, we weren't allowed to be
five, and we were forced to be 10. When we were five years old
in that particular area, emotionally, maybe we were
forced to be 10. And we were told, No, it's not okay for you
to be for you to go through this type of an emotional
development, you know, you need to be, you can't live life that
way. So don't express yourself like that now. Well, if they're
five, that's, that's part of the process that they have to go
through. But, but anyway, sometimes we just don't have
grace for each other, as we're learning, etc. So if, if we pass
over that development, and we force ourselves to be 10, God in
his mercy, knows that we have a development gap, and he will
take us back to five years old, so we can fill in the
development gap. So there's certain aspects in which you're
like, Oh, my word, I wish that I'd learned this back then.
Well, we all have those areas, we all have those areas, there
are some areas in which we're five, some areas in which we're
10, some areas in which we're 15. And when we're in real life,
we're at a totally different age, we're like 35, or 45, or
whatever. And we can get frustrated with ourselves. But
in like, Oh, well, other people learn this at a younger age?
Well, yeah. But, you know, we learned things at a younger age
than they did. And so they've got development gaps in areas
that we don't. We have a development gaps in areas that
they don't. So this is just kind of like, if we run into them, we
just allow it to be what it is, because we don't, we want to
finally allow ourselves to learn in those particular areas.
So that we're so that we have an opportunity now to fill in the
gap. You know, so anyway, so the thing is, though, the, the more
relaxed you are about being where it is that you are in the
development process, the faster that you'll develop in it, fill
in those gaps and move on. But if we resist it, and we don't
like it, and oh, my word, I shouldn't have, and then we get
all upset. And we get frustrated with ourselves, or we get
embarrassed, or we get it if we if we resist the process,
because we're, we wish that it wasn't like that, then we're
resisting it. And then it takes longer to get out of it. And
then also to get out of it, we're we're striving.
we're working really hard in order to, because we've created all this resistance. We now have
to fight that resistance to be, to be learning the thing that we need to learn. And so you learn it a
lot faster if you just don't resist. So anyway, thing is just have, just have compassion for
yourself and allow yourself to be where it is that you are. And, and, and you'll, and you will,
you will have faith in God faster. But anyway, but yeah. So anyway, so there was that.
I was just touching back on that because I just wanted to encourage you. I thought it was great.
And then you were talking about your friend, but I don't remember what I was going to say about,
about that. Oh, well, excuse me. The, just that, you know, the same thing, you know,
with your friend is to just recognize that, okay. To just again, allow yourself to be where it is
that you are, trust her and trust the Lord to the, especially trust the Lord that you are protected,
that you are not rejected, that you are identified as who he says that you are
meaning like you and your, the intrinsicness of yourself is not rejected. Now, maybe your friend
rejected you. Absolutely. That's real. Just like if you're sick, you really are sick. You know,
we don't ever want to deny reality, but just because we're sick on our body, doesn't mean
that our spirit is and that who we are is sick and that we're victim to it. So just because you're
sick and that's reality of this world, doesn't mean that we're victim to it. And so what we're
asking the Lord for is how do we bring our supremacy, meaning like we're, we're in a place
of power and authority in God. How do we bring that to, into our bodies so that our, our, our
body doesn't feel like it has to, sorry, I need more coffee and I need to sit up because you know,
it's earlier in the morning. That's fine. Go and get coffee if you want to. Oh, that's really sweet.
I think I will need to go grab the pot because I have to go grab the pot. But, um, uh, oh dear.
Now I forgot where I was. What was the last thing I said? You said, uh, to be your, uh,
I know we started talking about coffee and then, and then we'd get off.
Um, it was about your friend and the, oh, okay. Yeah. So we never want to deny reality. Yeah.
Really did reject you. Yeah. Something happened and that's reality.
Yeah. But your spirit, you're not threatened by it. Yes. Your spirit is not threatened by
the rejection. Correct. That's where it hurts. Yes. And your rejection means that
the reason we don't like it is if we feel disconnected, we feel, um, uh, we feel alone
and we feel separated, but God says we're not alone and we're not separated. So, you know,
in our spirit, so we can feel that we are, but it doesn't mean that we actually are. And so that's
what it is that we choose. We choose no more spirit and that, um, that we're not, even though
someone is rejecting us, we ourselves, we're not actually rejected. Uh, we're not alone. We're not
separated. That is the rejection is simply their response to us, but it actually isn't a threat
just like Jesus being in the boat where, you know, he was being tossed around by the wind and the
waves and he had water coming in over it, you know, whatever. And, and so he wasn't denying
the reality of the storm, but he didn't feel a need to change it. So because he's like,
it can happen, but it doesn't mean that I'm threatened by it. It's not, you know, because
the Lord is keeping me safe or the Lord is taking care of me, you know, and whatever. So it's the
same thing with like rejections that just because that is somebody else's response to us, does it
mean that, that, that we actually bear the consequences in our spirit of being rejected
and being separated, being disconnected, et cetera. So anyway, um, uh, but as far as your
interaction with your friend, you were saying that you don't, uh, that you don't trust her.
Well, so that's part of it is when is that obviously when someone interacts with us in
a particular way, we don't, that, that becomes.
like we realize, Oh my word, that's an actual reality of something they've done and that
they could do again. And so you just don't like to be in that situation. And so it doesn't mean
that you have to continue to put yourself in that situation, you know, emotionally or whatever,
they can build that trust back up with you, but, and then you can choose to trust them again,
et cetera, and put yourself in that, in that risky position. That's one of the things that we do as
friends is like, we trust people again and whatever, but as you're learning to do that,
as you're, as you're building up your, your, your choice, that this is who you are,
that you're not this well, then you're just, then you don't have to continue to put yourself
in a situation like emotionally where what happened can continue to happen.
Kind of like, uh, kind of like, uh, like somebody who's being physically abused, for instance,
just because like, say for instance, someone hits someone else and they apologize and whatever. Well,
you don't deny the fact that yeah, they really did hit you, but it doesn't. So just because
they've apologized, doesn't mean that it didn't happen. And just because God says that this is
who you are and that, and you're not this, but that this is who you are. Doesn't mean that you
have to continue to put yourself in a situation to be hit. It just means that the, that the meaning
of the hit isn't actually true. Like, like the way that we take it of like, oh, I'm being threatened.
God, isn't who he says that he is. God isn't protecting. God isn't providing for me or
whatever. It doesn't mean that. And so that's what we don't want to do. We don't want to take
things that happen on earth to be saying something about God, you know, that's against what it is
that he says that he is, but just because it doesn't, we don't want to take that and hold
that against God. Doesn't mean that we're, that we have to continue to put ourselves in this
situation and trust someone else like trust that they're not going to do it. Well, no, they might
do it again. So my point is that that is just part of a relationship issue that you just work
through with your friend that might just take some time or whatever, but what God wants you to do
is he it's not the, the big issue isn't whether or not you trust your friend. The big issue is
what are, what is that you don't allow what happened to change what you believe about yourself.
God wants you to believe what he says about you and for, and for that thing to not affect
you coming out of agreement with what God has said about you. He doesn't want that to have more
meaning to you about who you are than who he says that you are. That's what he wants you to deal
with. But it doesn't mean that just because you feel secure in the Lord that you expose yourself
to all of these things all of the time. Yeah. That's just normal relationship stuff. So the
point is don't feel bad about not trusting your friend. That's just, that's just, that's just part
of it. That's part of what you and your friend are going to walk through of like gaining that
trust back. And then if you offering your trust again and, and them earning it and meaning earning
it, like as in like, and desiring you to opt to, to give them their, your trust back and whatever,
but that is not the same thing as you believing certain things about yourself because they did
these things. God says, no, I want you to always believe what I say about you. That's what he wants
to deal with in the issue, but it, he doesn't require you to trust them. He requires you to,
to believe what he said about you and really to what he said about what he says about who they
are, that he created them in his image, that he loves them. And to not think badly about them as
like, oh, well then God doesn't love them or they're evil or they're whatever. Well, God's like,
I didn't say that. So don't come into agreement with that either, but that's different than the
whole trust thing between you and your friend, the whole trust thing. You can just not trust someone
with, and you can just not trust them while still believing what God said about you is true
and believe in what God said about them is true, but still not trusting how they're going to act
because they're going to act from here. They think that they're this, or they think that
they're that, and then they're, they're going to interact with you like that. Does that make sense?
It does. It does. It does make sense to separate it a little bit. Yeah.
In other words, what it is that God is asking of you, asking you to trust her
again, unless he tells you that that'll grow, you know, he's not upset at you for
that.
He's like, well, he's not upset at you at all.
But point is like, he's not, he's not telling you so to speak that, Hey,
that's, that's the issue.
He's like, no, the issue is don't let what happened tell you who you are and
that that matter in that it tell you that you're something different than I
told you, you are, that's what he wants to address.
So have grace for yourself that you are struggling to trust her, even though
she's apologized.
I'm going to go grab the pot.
I'm thinking this is really good.
And I'm sure I'm going to watch this again several times.
And just, uh, because it just, what happened, um, what I thought was
interesting was that, uh, you know, how I felt that I'm walking in rest in very
hard circumstances, for instance, in, because I felt rejected by this guy and
I still go to church and I received all of him in worship, even though he's
leading the worship.
And if he speaks, I can receive it.
And I felt like that's amazing that that's happening.
And I huge feel I'm in rest, but when I'm being rejected, when it kind of comes
like a light from clear sky, it's as if I don't have the ability to think clearly,
uh, or go into rest or any, I just react from a wound.
It's just like, and it's, uh, and when it kind of, the storm is over or you look
back and what happened and how you acted, I see that it feels like you almost don't
have a choice.
You just like react.
And that kind of scares me that I just, I just react to this wound that you just,
when someone hits it, you don't even think clearly.
You just shoot back or you go into protection or accusation or analyzing,
overthinking you go into, I go, it's just like a one follows the other and you
don't even have a saying.
So it's not like, Oh, now I was rejected.
Let me first go and be in my spirit and then see what happens.
If no, I just go straight into soul and flesh and just like,
because that's what you believe because it's what you believe.
So that's why I always tell people.
So you're going to, your gut reaction is going to be based on what you truly
believe.
Yeah.
You don't sit.
So what you're doing is you're on a journey to changing your belief, to
changing what it is that you have faith in.
And, um, and, and so you, um, that's why I'm always telling people, you know, I
really, well, for multiple reasons, why I don't recommend usually facing every
situation as its own separate thing, like, okay, I'm going to deal with this
issue and what it is that I'm believing is a lie.
So I need to remember what the truth is and I'm going to exchange the, the, the
lie for the truth, you know, and that's a lot of, um, it's, it's harder and it's
more work because you're having to do that with every single situation.
So it's, it's more detailed, it's more labor intensive and, and, and it's, um,
harder to deal with a root belief issue on a, on such a detailed level.
So that's why I tell people a lot of times, just, just pull your, just step,
forget this, uh, forget specific situations and trying to deal with
specific situations so much.
And I mean, dealing with specific situations, you know, it's perfectly fine.
I just recommend to people to not do it so much and to instead kind of like let
go of focusing on specific situations and instead choose something that feels
very irrelevant or very, yeah.
Or feel very disconnected from the situation and choose instead.
Okay.
Who does God say that I am?
And who does he say that he is?
And it can feel like, well, wait just a second.
I know, but God.
But what about this?
This is what they did.
This is what they said.
How should I handle it?
And what I recommend to people is you let it go completely.
And you just focus on who does he say that I am?
And who does he say that he is?
And it can feel disconnected.
It can feel like, yeah, but I want to address this.
But what we need to realize is that is addressing that
because that is really what our faith is being defined in
that's causing us to react this way
is because we're not believing God.
We're not believing what he said about himself
or what he said about us.
So that's why we're reacting this way.
That's why this hurts.
That's why this is a pain problem.
And so it feels irrelevant.
It feels like this situation
doesn't have anything to do with this one.
Okay, well, yeah, yeah.
I do need to believe what God says about me.
That's true.
I do, I do.
But we'll deal with that in a minute, Lord.
Right now, what about this?
And God's like, no, no, no.
That is the problem with this.
That's why you're feeling this way
is because you're not believing this.
So also when you deal with this,
this is such a root issue
that you'll then deal with all of these details
at the same time, instead of each one individually
and addressing each one.
If you deal with this one,
it'll fix all of these at the same time
without you focusing on them.
So it's a lot, again, it's a lot more effortless.
So like, and why was I telling you that?
I was telling you that, oh,
because you were talking about how,
you know, you just have these gut reactions, obviously,
because you're reacting out of what it is
you truly believe.
So what you wanna change is what it is deep down
that you really do believe.
Do you believe that God is who he says that he is?
In other words, that he, who does he say that he is?
Well, he says that he's good.
So therefore, that we can't allow,
that we have to choose that he's good
and not that he's evil,
or not that he is, can't be trusted,
or not that he does bad things to us.
And we can't believe those things.
We have to choose instead.
No, if he says he's good, he's good.
No matter what's going on in my life,
no matter the situations that he allows to happen,
they don't mean that he's not good.
I'm sorry, I hope my, yeah, I'm sure I did.
I was gonna say, I hope that my husband
got the keys to his office.
Yeah, I think he did.
Because I sometimes when I do like late night calls
or teachings or whatever, I use his office.
So I take his keys.
And I remember last night,
I had a transformation session with someone last night.
All of a sudden I thought,
I hope that I put his keys on the counter for him to grab.
And I did.
Anyway, but that's why it's important to choose,
to focus on this and not so much on these things
because obviously we're gonna just gut react
without thinking, without having time
to like shift into rest or anything.
We're just gonna have a gut reaction
to all of these situations.
So if we just focus, if we focus on living life,
in other words, approaching God differently,
and that's our new lifestyle, that is our new approach,
then the whole, all of the detailed areas
of our lives will change.
They'll be affected because we've chosen
a new approach to life.
Not that we've chosen to handle all of these situations
very differently.
Okay, well, okay, this is how I used to handle
this situation.
So instead I'm gonna handle it like this.
And this is what I'm supposed to believe.
And I need to remember that when I get into that situation.
And then, okay, and then this other situation,
I have a difficult time in these other situations.
So this is what I used to do.
So, but this time, if you do something in rest,
well, then I would handle it this way.
So I need to remember that.
And you're not gonna remember it.
Let's just be honest.
You're not gonna remember it
in the heightened emotion of the moment.
So what you do is you deal with all of these issues
when you're not in those issues.
You deal with them by waking up every morning
and choosing a different approach,
choosing that God is who he says that he is,
that he's good, that he's love,
that he's provider, he's protector,
that you don't have to do it for yourself anymore.
That even when bad things happen,
when you've got pain and discomfort,
that doesn't say anything different about God.
It doesn't say that he's not protecting you,
that he's not providing for you,
and that he's a good God.
not good and whatever, it's a totally different approach.
It is a totally different way to live life.
And your approach, you're changing how you live life,
meaning like not all of the specific things that you do.
You're just approaching your existence
and life differently.
And then that is going to affect very naturally
how you find yourself gut reacting in these situations.
You'll find yourself reacting differently.
You'll find yourself not being triggered in these areas
and you're not even focused on them.
You're not even focused on trying to change
how you interact in those areas.
You're changing what it is that you believe about yourself
and that you're coming into agreement with the fact
that you are who God says that you are
and that he interacts with you as provider, protectors,
good, as all of that, like he says that he does.
So once those places in you are healed,
you'll automatically change how you handle
all of these situations.
Because the reason you're handling the way that you are
is based off of the fact that you're not believing God
in certain areas.
So if you start believing God in those areas,
it's gonna change automatically without you even trying,
it's gonna change how you respond.
And then you're gonna look back on the responses
and think, that's wild.
I don't usually respond in this situation
the way that I just did.
And I wasn't even trying.
I just naturally responded differently.
That's what you're trying to do.
You're trying to default back to your natural state
so that you interact in all of these areas of your life
based on your natural state,
not on who it is that you thought that you were,
that you thought was natural, that was habit.
You default back to your natural state
and then that's how you interact with life.
And because this is so different than this,
you'll be responding differently to the situation
without even trying,
because your wounds are being healed.
What it is you believe is different.
So you're not triggered in those situations anymore
because those triggers were based off of old beliefs.
How long does it take?
Well, it's just what you're doing
is you're choosing a different way to approach life.
And so it's a journey.
And you're always going to be learning more
and you're always gonna be,
it's not something like,
because what a lot of times we're trying to do,
if we're like, well, can I shorten this?
Can it happen really fast?
One of the things that we're thinking is so often is,
well, I want to avoid pain.
But one of the things, so how can I like get through,
how can I rip the bandaid off faster?
But really God's just like, no, that's the point,
is trust that you're not threatened
even when you go through pain.
Because our lives, what we're doing
is we are overcoming the pain of this world.
That's what we're overcoming.
But in order to overcome it,
because of course the world is subject to frustration,
it's not believing that God is safe.
And so what we're doing is we are coming in
and the pain is the warring of the flesh against the spirit.
That's what pain is.
It's where you are divided against yourself and it hurts
because you're not supposed to be at war with yourself.
Your soul and your body are at war against your spirit.
Your flesh is at war against your spirit
and it's not supposed to be.
So whenever you are at war with yourself, it hurts
because you're supposed to be in unity.
You're supposed to walk together.
You're supposed to agree with yourself.
And so anyway, so that's what the pain is.
So what we're doing is we are learning to bring our soul
and our body into agreement with our spirit
so that it's no longer at war with our spirit.
That lessens the pain.
But then, so that's overcoming that aspect of creation,
which is our flesh.
Then we're supposed to bring that as the rest of creation,
which is like, you know, animals and trees
and situations and whatever.
And now we have to speak in the truth about who God is
to all of those situations, to all those people.
And that's gonna create that,
they're gonna war against us.
That's what they're doing right now.
They're warring against the spirit.
But we have to go through that war and come out,
come out stronger in our, with our belief in God,
which will overcome the flesh,
that will overcome the lies
that creation is believing about God
and give it the opportunity to come into.
alignment, that's what we're doing.
So this whole thing about like pain or whatever, that's what,
that's what we're doing here is we're overcoming.
We're going to pain is evidence of the fact that there's something
that has to be overcome.
There's something in creation.
That's not believing God.
And so obviously we're going to run up against it, but what do we
do when we run up against it?
God's like, I want you to bring the truth of who I am into this situation.
And that overcomes it.
So there's, I'm afraid that there's no avoiding pain for the rest of our,
you know, for here, it, what we're doing as the body of Christ is what do
we do when we run up against pain?
Do we bring in the truth of God to finally bring it into alignment or is,
you know, or are we going to, um, uh, uh, are we going to come into
agreement with that pain?
You know, that God isn't who he says that he is and that kind of a thing.
So there's that.
The other reason why sometimes we want to get through the process faster is we
believe that we're not, uh, that God is trying to get us to a particular
destination and that that is his whole point and that we're a problem to him
or that we're not in, um, we're not pleasing to him until we get here.
And so we're like, how can I just get through this really fast?
So that, how can I get through the state of condemnation in his eyes, you know,
fast, and then finally get what he wants, where he's pleased with me and wants me
to be, and we have to shift our understanding to understand, to believe
that no, it's not a particular destination that he's holding us to.
So to speak, it's the fact that we, he's that the point is not the destination.
That's what I'm trying to say.
The point is just the journey of the development of their relationship.
It's the it's developing.
Even Adam was developing a relationship with God and he, and that was before he
sinned, so the development of a relationship with God is the point.
That's what we're doing.
It's where the point is being on a journey.
It's not arriving.
We don't have anywhere that we're ever going to arrive because God's always
trying to teach us more and more about himself, but he's infinite.
So therefore we're never going to get to the end.
So if we believe that he's holding us to a particular destination and that he's
not pleased with us until we get there, well, then we're believing then that
we're all that God just birthed us into a state of condemnation and he's always
going to treat us and we're always going to be condemned to him because he
literally set it up so that we can never arrive and that's not what God would do.
So his whole point apparently is, Hey, let's just develop the relationship.
Let's just, let's just take the journey.
So you being on the journey is God is you being where God wants you to be.
You want you to just be developing that with him.
So the whole thing of like, well, uh, you know, well, how do I like
get through this really fast?
No, the thing is just go.
What God is wanting you to do is to just go through it, not go through it
fast and get it over with and whatever.
He's just like, no, no, no.
We're just, we're going through everything.
We're going through life.
We're going through eternity.
We're going through the heavens.
We're going through the earth.
We're just going, that's what we're doing.
It's the point is what we're doing every day.
So we, that's what God, um, uh, how do I put it?
D does that make sense?
Yeah, it does make sense.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
So anyway, the whole thing of like, uh, of, um, you know, how do we like get
through this faster, so to speak is the faster that we meaning like the, the
more that we believe God and, and, um, let go of all of these things.
Let go of accusation against him.
Let go of our lies that we're believing about him and choose
that he is who he says that he is.
It is true that the less, the less painful that life will be because our soul and
our body are coming into agreement with him.
So the faster that we actually choose that what he says is true and not that
what the earth is trying to tell us is true, the, then the, then the, um, then
the, the, the more that will overcome the faster that will overcome the
flesh and we'll have less pain.
Now by that understand, I do not mean that we won't experience pain because
we're just going to do that for the rest of our life, because things.
come against us.
So there are things that are just going to hurt,
but how do we interact with the hurt?
Because you can only overcome something
if you go through it.
So we have to go through the pain in order to overcome it.
We can't avoid it to overcome it.
If we avoid it, we haven't overcome it.
So same thing with Jesus,
the way that he had to overcome death
was not to avoid death
and not to be the only person who'd never died.
He had to actually die.
But on the other end, he resurrected,
which proved that death couldn't conquer him.
But he had to go through it
in order to prove that it couldn't conquer him.
Avoiding it doesn't prove anything.
It doesn't prove that death, it wasn't more powerful.
You have to go through the thing
in order to prove that you're more powerful.
That's the same thing, you know, with like pain, et cetera,
we have to go through it and that's what's overcoming it.
But anyway, so what we're doing with rest
is going through life from a different perspective
and a different approach.
It's like, oh, okay.
So it's about something different than I,
going through life is about something different
than I thought that it was, you know?
But can you explain to me a little bit
about what you had your experience
that God taught you about rest,
but you were living in it from a place of your flesh
and the way that I describe it,
that I have been walking in faith,
but maybe from sometimes from a place of stress.
Yeah.
Because I think that is something that I'm experiencing now
and it's hard to distinguish,
or I'll be like doing all the right things,
but I'm not entering rest, all right?
Or I lose it really fast.
It comes and then it just goes.
And I'm being very focused on the principles or the rules
or the, okay, what do I need to do now?
Kind of the same way I was doing before,
it's just that it's a new belief system.
But it's-
That's right.
Yeah, that's a good question
because what we're not doing
is we're not exchanging old rules for new rules.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And we talked about that in the beginning,
that the things that I'm learning here
could just become a new religion.
Yes.
Yeah, it could just be just replacing
other teaching things that you heard before,
and then that becomes your belief.
And that's not God either.
Yes.
It's not the system.
Yeah, so for one thing,
the way that we change that is to believe
that we're not in condemnation when we're not in rest.
Because one of the things that we do is we're like,
oh my goodness, if I'm not doing it right,
if I'm not in rest and I'm now believing the old way
or I'm still doing things in the old way or whatever,
well, see, I shouldn't be doing that.
God said, I shouldn't be doing that.
I should be doing rest, so therefore that's bad.
I'm bad.
I shouldn't be like this or whatever.
Well, that's this approach from condemnation of like,
I'm bad.
And so therefore we're coming into agreement
with the fact that God's not who he says that he is.
That he said, I'm not condemned, but that's not true.
And so we have to choose, even when we're not in rest,
we have to come into agreement with God about something.
Come into agree,
even if you can't come into agreement with him
that he is who he says that he is in certain areas,
come find some area that you can believe
and come into agreement with him
about that he is, that you're not condemned
for being where it is that you are.
Even when you're sinning, even when you're sinning,
that you're not condemned, come into agreement somewhere.
So that is a really big thing,
is that there's no longer condemnation
because under the law, there's condemnation.
So now, even when you sin,
you're not under any condemnation.
So that's a really big one about how to,
because if you believe you're under condemnation,
then you're gonna, then you've come into agreement
with the fact that God's not who he says that he is.
So you're out of agreement.
So that, so you can, so approach rest
and shifting into rest from a place of rest,
which I know sounds really weird,
but the whole point is,
the whole thing is like no condemnation
and choose that this is who you are.
You're not trying to get somewhere.
You're already there.
The law comes from the approach that we're not there
and we're trying to get there.
Like I'm doing the wrong things.
So I know I'm in, so therefore I'm not there
and I need to work in order to get there.
I need to do something in order to be
who God says that I am.
And so that's a really major thing
about how we switch from the law or striving
or trying to work really hard for our faith
by coming into agreement first
with the fact that we're already there,
that we already have faith,
that God's already given it to us,
that we already do.
believe our father, we already do love our father, we already receive our love from our father,
we already are the thing, but our soul and our body just are having to learn that having to come
into agreement that we're already there. So we have to approach it from this perspective that
instead of the law, which says that you're not there and you're trying to get there,
what we have to do, which is that whole idea of like working really hard for our faith.
So I'm not there. And then I'm having to work really hard, God, I'm so sorry. I haven't been
doing it right. I need I'm in a place of lack. I'm not there. So I'll try to do something.
And I'll try to believe you to get you to be pleased with me. Then we're using even belief
as some kind of currency or faith is some kind of currency to allow us to get something from God.
And what we have to do instead is okay, that was the approach of the loss, the approach of
rest, you know, the approach of actually faith, which is believing God is from this perspective,
that we're all we first come into agreement with the fact that we're already there.
There's nothing we've already become the thing we're not trying to become it.
Law believes that we're not somewhere and we're trying to become it. And we have to do something
to become it. We even have to get we have to transact something to God in order to get
something from God. He hasn't given it to us yet. And we have to and we're in a place of lack.
And we have to do something to get it. That's that old approach of the law. So instead,
what we want to do is if we find ourselves in a way where we're, where we are condemning
ourselves for not being in rest, we're condemning ourselves, we're not having faith. Oh, God,
you know, I'm so sorry, I need to try to do something or be different in order to please
you in order to shift into faith and rest and all of that, then that's coming from the perspective
of strife. And instead, God's like, no, first of all, before you do anything, believe that you're
there. Believe what I said, did I say that you're there? Did I say that I am who I said that he said
who I said that I am, then start from there, and then respond to that. I'm already there.
So now then, how should how should I be? What should I do? What would I, you know, how would
I interact in this situation? So it all starts from either, either approaching the situation
from believing we're already there. And believing that God is true, and that what he said is true,
or coming from this perspective that of the law, which is, I'm not there, I've fallen, and I need
to do something to get there. Even faith, that's the difference that that requires sweat in order
to overcome. This overcomes simply by first approaching it from the fact that that God is
that we believe God. Yeah, that's the difference. Does that does that make sense that you're already
there? Because that's the whole point of it. It's like, you don't have to do anything, you are already
spirit. And the spirit always follows Jesus, and the spirit always is at rest. Yeah, no, it's just,
it's not like, how can I get into rest? It's like, in my spirit, I already am in rest, in a way.
Yes, exactly. In your spirit, you're already in rest. Yeah, already there. Your soul and your body
just start when you've been climbing your whole life, it's kind of started hard to stop climbing.
I know. Yeah. So but it's that, you know, again, rest is the fact that you don't have to climb
anymore, because you've already you're already there. So now you just learn and ask the Lord
to mature you and how to live from where you already are. And that brings me to also the
question, what do you recommend or think or feel that I should do now or like, now the rest
intensive is coming to a closure? What what does people do? What do people do after the rest
intensive? What do you recommend? Or do you think anything for me? Or what do you think? Yeah, well,
you just continue to do you know, what it is that we've been just, you know, you just continue on
this journey of learning all of these things at just deeper levels. So you're becoming freer and
freer. And the Lord will walk you through that, like as in, you'll hear he himself is your is
your mentor showing you and revealing to you different areas in which you're not in freedom.
And he invites you to shift into freedom, he invites you to let that thing go and to choose
freedom instead to choose.
to let go of believing that you're here,
where life is really hard,
and to believe that you're already here.
And then ask the Lord, okay, so what do I already have?
And how do I live from it?
You know, that's what we're asking him.
And so what you do is you just continue
to choose this at a deep level of, again,
always from this first perspective of the fact that,
no, God is true, God is right, I'm already there,
I don't have to try to work harder to be somewhere,
to be anywhere, because I'm already there.
And then you start from that perspective.
Like, okay, if that's true,
then how do I approach the situation?
Or what is one of the things that God says that I am?
So, okay, so I'm already there.
Okay, God, where am I?
Who am I?
You know, how, like, who do you say that I am?
And who are you?
And if I believe that, how does that then change
how I'm viewing this situation?
And I don't mean that you necessarily think
through all of these things.
Sometimes you do.
Sometimes I have to like,
kind of like mentally walk myself through,
okay, if I'm in a, like, say, for instance,
if I'm in a difficult financial situation,
sometimes I will mentally walk myself through,
okay, I'm feeling anxious, I'm feeling stressed.
Okay, but who does God say that he is and that I am
and what the truth is?
Okay, so if he's provider,
and I choose that he's provider in my life,
meaning like that he's provider
regardless of whether or not I see money, he's provider.
So if he is provider,
then how do I now approach this financial situation
that I'm in?
And I think, okay, well then,
there's no need for me to get stressed
because even if I, and this is how I like
walk myself through it.
And I'm like, well, because even if I have to,
because God will either show me, how do I put it?
I'm provided for and I'm protected
even if I'm having to go through certain things in life
that I would consider bad consequences
or painful consequences, I'm not threatened.
Jesus was still in the boat.
He was being knocked around by the storm.
It's not like he wasn't being knocked around.
He was being knocked around by the storm.
So he was having to experience consequences.
He was having to experience the results
or the effects of a particular situation.
So if I'm in a difficult financial situation,
just because I'm experiencing the effects
of being in a difficult financial situation
doesn't mean that God's not provider.
And so, and I just choose that he is.
And then I ask him, okay, Lord,
you say that I'm, that you're provider,
that I'm already provided for,
I'm already in a state of provision.
So that is where, that's the reality of me being,
of where it is that I already am in spirit.
So how do I be that Lord in my,
how do I bring that down and express that
into my soul and into the body realm?
How do I do it so that I believe it in my,
so that my mind and my emotions
come into agreement with it,
and that my body comes into agreement with it,
and my heart stops racing, I stop being afraid, et cetera.
How do I do that, Lord?
But I first have to come to it from the perspective
that he is, that I'm already there,
that he's provider, that I'm provided for.
So Lord, how do we manifest that into the physical?
I choose that this is more true,
and this is more and is of a higher reality
than this reality.
The reality that I'm in a difficult financial situation
does not mean that I'm threatened as a being.
It just means that I might experience
some challenging financial issues
where I have to go to the bank and I have to do this,
and then I have to, and then I may not have money for,
to get all of the food that I would normally like to get,
but God's never let me starve yet.
So, and he always makes some way,
he always either sends me food or he sends me,
now I'm not in a difficult financial situation now,
but this is how God's taught me this,
was going through a lot of various situations,
one of which is very extreme financial situations.
So that's why I'm using it as an example.
But anyway, and he'll just kind of like
walk me through those things.
And so I just have to realize, okay,
even if I go through difficult,
like challenging and painful and uncomfortable effects
of being in the physical reality that I'm in,
it doesn't mean that that is saying that God,
that that is proving that God is anywhere.
different than who he says that he is, and that I am not where he says that I am. He says that
I'm safe. He says I'm provided for, and it doesn't matter what happens on this earth. That doesn't,
that doesn't, that doesn't change what is actually true in the spirit. And I choose that as a higher
reality that I'm living from. And that is more important to me than, than the pain of this
situation. And so through that, God ends up a lot of times changing this situation,
simply because I chose a higher reality. But it's because I chose that reality,
allowing God to keep it this uncomfortable, if you wanted to. God, you don't have to change
the situation. You don't have to save me from this situation. I choose you instead,
instead of being saved from this situation. And that's hard. So anyway, point is that,
that you just keep asking that the Lord will just keep bringing it. He'll, you will continue
to be triggered by things as the flesh is warring against the spirit and things will come up and
then God will give you invitations of like, okay, you know, do you believe me? I want you to live
in freedom. I don't want you to live in, in pain and in turmoil and in all of that. So anyway,
is that, is that helpful? Does that make sense? You're just going to continue doing what it is
that you're doing. You're just going to do it at deeper levels. And the more that you do it,
the more that you'll own it. And therefore the more that you will that, that the more that then
when you go back and you rewatch those teachings, the more you'll understand, you'll understand,
and you'll hear me say things you didn't hear the first time because you've owned it more now.
And so you can understand some things that I say that you don't, that maybe you didn't understand
the first time because there's only so much you can get the first time, but the more that you get
and the more that you live and the more that you, uh, that you, uh, that you own in your
personally between you and the Lord, um, then the more things that when you go back and listen to
the teachings, the more things that you'll hear, and then you'll start moving into,
to like deeper measures of rest, et cetera. So my people who go back and watch my videos
multiple times, and they say that every time they do, they get something new because they get
multiple new things because they watch them after they've owned it to a particular degree.
And then they rewatch them again and like, Oh, wait a minute. She said all of these things.
Well, that now makes more sense. And now I know how to apply that new thing,
you know, to how it is that I was living. And I didn't hear it the first time because
there's only so much you can consume. So anyways, you'll just keep moving into deeper levels.
Um, now one of the things that I was thinking of, and I was thinking of announcing it tonight,
um, is, uh, I'm still, I'm still kind of like thinking about it and thinking about,
is this what I want to do? But I was thinking about doing an advanced rest intensive and going
like through the last sessions of the inner is rest series. And, um, uh, and anyway, so I was
thinking of offering that from now until December the 31st. So basically for another six weeks,
I say now meaning like, you know, it rest intensive ends this, uh, November 19th. So.
So that's this week. Yes. Yes. And so I was thinking, uh, there's six weeks between
starting next week through the end of December, which fascinatingly is exactly six weeks because
December 31st is a Saturday. Wow. But anyway, I just thought, um, maybe offering, um, uh, an,
an advanced one to go through the last part of the series. And, uh, so I was gonna, I was thinking of,
of offering that. And, um, so if you, if that would be of interest to you, well then, um,
you know, you're welcome to join us for that as well. And what I was thinking is that, um,
that this, that for this one, because I've still tried to figure out, well, how would I do this
exactly? But, uh, because I know that the time difference is, but I still wanted you to be
involved in the community. They've all just loved each other and everyone always loves the community.
It's one of their favorite parts. In fact, I was talking to somebody again last night
and they were very disappointed to find out that, that once the six weeks is over,
that they're now out of the Facebook community because it's, they're just in the Facebook
community during the six weeks. And then after that, you know, they're no longer in the community
where they were so disappointed and they're like, well, how do we, sorry, I'm trying to figure out
who that is. Um, you know, we'll, we'll.
I don't, how can we like, can we like say that there's a community?
I was like, well, you know, and she finally realized, oh, so we
have to kind of create our own.
I was like, well, yeah, because that's because, uh, the particular
community that they're part of is, is, um, is one that I just dropped
them into and it's actually an old community and so, so the, this
particular rest intensive was just, Hey, you get to be part of this
community for a while.
So instead of starting a brand new community that they could just be
part of for six weeks, and then I closed the group, I'm putting them
into this old community that they get to experience and then, and
then they're, they're out.
So anyway, but the thing is, they're all just like, but we want to
keep going with the group because they just enjoy each other so much,
which I think is great.
And I always tell everybody that I always tell them, I said, the
community is one of everybody's favorite parts because they
realize they're not alone.
So what I wanted to mention to you is that if you decide to do, if you
would like to do the advanced thing, then, um, and I don't have all
the particulars figured out yet.
I was hoping to do that today that it, and if you would like to do it,
I, I wanted to, um, offer to you as, as part of like, you know, an
international thing for you to go ahead and be part of the community.
Now, I don't know about like the timings of when we would meet live
and I wouldn't require you obviously to make live events that were like in
the middle of the night or something like that, but, um, uh, but you maybe
would be able to have access to those recordings so you could watch them
later, watch like all of us meet, or you could choose, you know, on certain
nights to like, I don't know, wake up and join us.
I don't know.
But, uh, but anyway, so I wanted to mention that to you that I was thinking
about offering that through the end of December, because sometimes this is
sensitive for one thing, people have momentum now they've been doing it for
six weeks and they would like a bit more support, especially through the holidays.
Um, cause some of it, some people like get very challenged during the holidays
because of like interactions with them for one thing, busy schedules and how
to be at rest during that time.
And then also, um, uh, stuff with a family, you know, issues that they run
into with family or sometimes heightened during the holidays.
So anyway, um, I, uh, just wanted to let you know, I have thought about that
because I've had multiple people reach out to me asking, okay, so what's the
next thing we can do?
Um, and I wasn't going to do anything until January, but I've had so many
people say, express interest that they want to do something that they want to
know the next thing that they can do.
Um, so I thought that maybe I'd offer this through December.
So anyway, so anyway, there's no idea.
Would it be, um, would it be the same time or would it be, would it, could
it possibly change because you've had seminars before that I've been able to
join because it's been different times, but would it be, you haven't decided
like the time, when would the times be like, like when were those seminars that
I did that you had one on Sunday?
One time.
Uh-huh.
And I was like in the middle of the afternoon or I think so.
Yeah.
Okay.
I don't know.
I think there were a couple from America, one from England, maybe one
from America and then me.
I didn't want to shame one.
Oh yeah.
The shame one.
Oh yeah.
That was, that was in the middle of the afternoon.
Um, so cause you're okay.
So right now it is 11 o'clock.
What time is it there right now?
It's five, it's five, 11.
Okay.
So you're six hours ahead.
Yeah.
Okay.
Now that we, everybody's, you know, time has changed and whatever.
So I might be able to do that.
The reason that I did it is because most people can meet in the
evenings than during the day.
Um, but maybe I could see, I had thought about maybe seeing if, um, like at least
one, if not, um, if that, if at least one of them can be moved, um, and who knows,
maybe, maybe two, that would be, that would be really nice.
So anyway, let me, let me look into that and see if that could be, that could be
moved.
So anyway, but either way I would let you, you know, you'd be able to have access
at least to the recordings, but I would obviously love you to be able to interact
with the community, you know, as, um, as much as possible.
So, because it really is fun.
You said you were planning something for January also.
Yeah.
So in January though, I was just going to do this one again.
Okay.
More people like, like for maybe people, well, I mean, people who've already done
it could do it again, but I figured that.
And that's what a lot of people do.
A lot of people take the rest intensive multiple times,
but I was just thinking, you know,
I'm having people reach out to me that want to do it
that have never done it before.
And so anyway, point is whoever wanted to join,
I was going to do this one, the foundations one,
I was going to do it again in January.
Yeah, cause I have a, yeah,
I have a couple of friends that I'm telling you about
what's going on.
I don't know if they would be interested.
They're also from Norway,
but they're really interested in what's going on in my life.
I think they're very,
I think they struggle with some of the same things
that I do to really live from rest.
So I think, yeah, I'll tell them about it too.
Yeah, and the biggest, what do you call it?
The biggest, what's the word?
Ah, the biggest convincer for people
is to watch their friends' lives change.
That convinces them that this is real
because just hearing something, you know,
that someone tells them about,
they're like, oh, I'm glad that makes you happy.
That's great.
But when they watch their friend's life change
and it's something that they want for themselves as well,
that is the biggest thing that convinces people.
So I have some people that,
I have at least one person
who has talked to a friend of hers
and that friend has now reached out to me
based off of the change that they've seen
in their friend's lives.
And so, and they're like, oh my word,
if that's real, then I want it too.
And so anyway, so anyway,
the thing is that, yeah,
yeah, if your friends would love to join,
then that would be great.
So you can let them know that I'm planning to do something,
doing the foundations thing in January.
The reason is that,
otherwise I thought about, you know,
starting one again in December,
but the thing is that most people don't want to sign up
for something new during the holidays
because they're so busy.
But the reason I thought of extending this in the holidays
is because everyone, I figured,
it sounded to me like people were wanting
to keep the momentum.
They were already, so in other words,
this is people who've already been doing it
and they were wanting,
even though it was going to be during the holidays,
they were wanting to have friends to go through it with
about like rest and, you know, their rest friends
and have the support group and whatever.
So that's why I thought,
even though it's during the holidays,
I bet you that maybe from the way people are talking,
maybe they're wanting that.
But I didn't figure that anybody knew
would want to do the rest intensive during December
because the new stuff is very intense.
This other stuff is not as intense in a manner of speaking
because the foundations are already there.
And so they at least know what we're talking about.
And now it's just like, okay, how do you do this?
How do you do this in relationships?
How do you do this in business?
How, what is the power of intention?
How do you approach God and believe him for goals
and dreams and promises?
And how do you do all of that from a place of rest?
So it's just continuing something that they already know
that they're already been introduced to.
And it's just, how do you do it in deeper levels
in different areas of life?
It's not, they've already been introduced
to this new perspective in this new lifestyle.
And so anyway, so that's why I-
I am definitely interested and would think,
think about it.
And also I think that I miss the community,
because I'm going through this all alone
over here in Norway and people don't understand
what I'm talking about.
And it's also hard for me to think of a way
than kind of to meet, have someone that can just listen.
Like you said, your brother and sister-in-law
when they don't understand or they haven't seen the videos
and they don't know.
So I have missed the community definitely
or someone to just walk with through it.
And so I would have to think about it,
but I'm definitely in-
Yeah, just whatever you'd want.
I'm just offering it.
Just, I wasn't going to offer it,
but I've had so many people ask, well, what can I do now?
And what can I, how can I keep going?
And so I thought, okay,
if everyone's kind of asking me to keep going,
I thought I'd try to make it happen.
And so, anyway.
Am I the only international?
Okay, I'm-
Because the other two people,
the other two people that had asked
that are international
asked about it as well when I sent them the when I sent them the offer they didn't want it, they only wanted it if they could do the community, but the problem with the community is that is that I, I had never done an international with the community
at the same time. And with that time difference. Yeah, I needed to make sure that. Okay, well, if, because the community aspect and developing it is so important to the process that I didn't know really how to how to, how would I put that,
that I couldn't require all of these people to attend the live events, but not the international people I was like, well then I can't require the in in the American people to attend, if other people don't have to attend and some going, and the whole
reason for me requiring them to attend is because it's that important to their progress. So I'm like, I can't treat people different is what I was thinking and so I'm like, so because this was the first time I tried doing an international while I did the
I was like, Okay, I don't know how to get them how to treat everybody fairly. And so, and to make sure that everybody has what it is that they need and that the internationals have just as much as what they need is like the nationals.
And so I anyway because it was new I thought I think I'm just going to have to do two programs at the same time. Yeah, now that I've done this I'm like, No, no, I could I could do the, I could bring in the internationals and they not have to do like meet all of the meat, do all of the groups
If they don't, if they don't want to.
Because, in a manner of speaking, that would mean that they were the ones missing out because there's so much benefit.
Together, everyone loves getting together on the on the calls. So, you still get an aspect of community in the Facebook group, and people do videos and whatever so there's still ways to interact, but it's just extra special to all get to get to get together.
So anyway, the thing is that that's why it works, the way that it did this time but now after having gone through it and seeing how everything was I'm like no, I'm going to try to integrate it so just like this past time I was trying something new
Let's try to do international and national at the same time. Now I'm like okay now let me see if I can combine them and get it to work. And by work, the whole point is, are people changing are people getting what they need.
And that's what I want. I want to make sure that whatever I do is actually being effective, otherwise there's no point, there's no point in joining the rest intensive if it's not effective.
You know, so what is it that I can do to make sure that it is effective for people and that's what was on my heart to make sure of and so I think that after having gone through this this past time I'm like you know what, let's try to do the.
Let's have everybody be in the same community. And let's see if I can make sure that everyone gets what it is that they need. So, and I think it's worth to have these, this has worked really well for you.
Yes. Yeah, I'm so glad.
Maybe, and maybe that's what I needed maybe I needed more one on one time. And that definitely got more one on one time because I had like specific things and it's been good to meet you every week, one on one.
Yes. Yeah, the private transformation sessions are very powerful because they're one on one, and they're just like people can get specific situations answered and talked about and whatever.
And it's a, it's very very powerful. And, but the name is the community part and so therefore they missed.
Anyway, so you got more transformation sessions than they did more.
You didn't have a community and so how can I give her bowl. So, anyway, so anyway, just if you want to, and you will probably post it on your page, what kind of times and what frame frame and everything.
Yes, yes.
Yeah, and if I decide to do it, it'll probably start next Sunday.
Me, because it ends this Saturday. So anyway, it would be pretty, it would be pretty fast because I want to make sure that people have the six weeks, especially because we will not be doing the full six weeks.
I'll have everybody be in the Facebook group for six weeks, but we won't be meeting as much as we normally would simply because we will have will have holidays.
And I don't want.
People I don't want to take away people's time from their families by forcing them to like do all of this stuff I mean even during school people take.
Christmas holiday, you know, so I don't want and sometimes take off the week between Christmas and new year so.
there's we're not going to have as many like get together sessions, as we had this time simply because it's around the holidays, but I wanted to at least.
and allow people to all be in the Facebook group together for six weeks, but anyway, so all yeah i'll put it up on on on my page or notify you somehow and.
Whatever so that's one of the things that I was working out today with all the details to be able to present to everybody, so you were the first person to hear about it.
Thank you.
Anyway, all right, well, it was good to get to visit with you.
yeah um I don't know, regardless of whether it's it's next week or some other time in a.
bit so has this been good for you, has this as the rest intensive been good for you have what do you have any like feedback or.
it's been really, really good I feel like I said before that something deep inside me is changing, but it's like a huge ship.
So it's not like done like that, but I feel that there's happening things on many levels in me deep in my heart, but also in the practicals of how I live life and how I think.
And I do feel like it's going up and down and a little bit two steps forward and then one step behind and like I said, sometimes the fragility.
But I definitely feel that there's things going on and that i'm.
Understanding things on a deeper level what's going on and i'm having more hope for the future and more hope for my life and just that I actually don't have to live in stress.
I don't have to go in faith from stress yeah and that it's possible it's i'm not there, yet I still have a lot of stress in my life, but I feel.
That more that these weeks and even just since I started listening to your teaching this summer.
You know that's right um so yeah I feel like i've been in it, since the summer and, but of course more intensely the last weeks.
Is that there's going on yeah I think the thing with a guy like things that i'm told you, I think I would have handled it very differently.
And it could have.
put me in a lot like I can handle I feel like i'm getting stronger and I can handle more things and.
Just to see the blessed now, instead of not being in the church i'm in the church and i'm serving the church i'm growing and i'm contributing and.
I don't know if I would have been able to do that, unless I was walking in rest or new yeah yeah.
yeah well i'm excited for you, I know it's so much more freeing way.
approach the Lord that he's that good, you know yeah.
I think that I like this non striving that i'm already in rest.
And it's very because i'm so used to letting go and doing a lot of things in the soul and like I said faith, but maybe from a place of striving, so it feels like a relief to me.
That I don't even have to try or I don't even have to believe.
Because yeah and also that i've been really honest with God about being angry and bitter.
Then okay releasing that i'm so mad at you i'm just honestly so mad at you and I feel like you hate me like we talked about the first session just raw honesty that's where i'm at and then.
I don't even have to try to be good or I don't even have to believe that you, you love me, but I can choose that you say that you are who you say you are yeah yeah yeah and that and that he does love you and that you will just and you choose that and then after you choose that then you'll come to believe it and then you'll come to feel it and then you'll come to you know.
convince yours be convinced that it's true, but you choose it first yeah so all those things exactly because you already have it and faith is a gift faith is not something that we work for it's not something we strive for it's also a gift from the Lord that has to be effortlessly received as well yeah anyway look good so much i'm so you i'm so glad that it was helpful and that you were able to share that with us.
I feel like every time it's been kind of set up by the Lord, I feel like we're coming straight
to something that's where I'm at or where I'm stuck.
Yes.
Yeah.
And also that these things happen with rejection.
I think it was very good timing because then I could bring it in our conversations.
Yes.
Exactly.
We work with something that's actually going on instead of like, well, I know I get rejected
sometimes, but I'm not there now.
I was, I'm actually in the emotion and I think that was just really good.
Good.
Yeah.
Cause that's the most powerful way to do it is to help people like while they're going
through it, which is why I do the six weeks is to allow time to come up.
It's not just for, in other words, for life to come up so that people can start facing
things and go through them and rest as opposed to just teaching someone about something,
you know, in a really short amount of time.
Cause I can teach rest in a shorter amount of time than six weeks, but I allow six weeks
for like life to come up so that I can help walk people through real life situations.
You know, not just theory of like, yeah, well I get rejected sometimes or whatever, but
like, okay, now I'm through in it.
Let's talk about it.
Yeah.
That's the powerful place.
I'm so glad.
I'm glad that you've enjoyed it.
I'm glad that it's been good.
So yeah, I will, I'll let you know about what it is that I decided to do about the other.
And then you can just decide if that sounds good to you or not.
So totally up to you.
Like I said, the only reason I'm offering it is because people kept asking.
So I was like, oh, I wasn't going to do anything because I thought for, I thought, I mean,
I've got time, but I thought I didn't think anybody else was, you know, going to be interested
during the holidays and maybe they won't, maybe they just want something, but then when
they stop and think about it, they're like, well, that's true.
It is during the holidays.
So I'm just going to probably offer it and then see, you know, if it's, if it's meeting
their needs and if it's not, well then that's fine.
So, no.
Sounds good.
All right.
Well, it's good to visit with you Renata.
All right.
I'll see you one time or the other and let me know.
You are welcome.
Bye.