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Okay.

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Hello.

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Good morning.

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So the, the, I don't know, I was having issues with the internet and then apparently I had two meetings for you. And so I was trying to figure out which one was the most recent one.

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Yeah.

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So how did you send me a new link.

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Yeah, yeah. These ones. Yes. Yeah.

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See you too. How are you.

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I'm doing all right. Yeah, so it's been two weeks. Yes, yes it has. So, is it going so far have you watched the teachings that were up were you able to like watch them it's like, I guess the, the rest, the last that gets that rest group that

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half that and we did last Sunday. I didn't know if you got a chance to watch that replay.

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I watched the first one but there came one afterwards to right.

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Yeah, that was.

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That was Sunday night and I'm trying to remember if I had that one up. I think I do. I think I posted it, but it was just this past Sunday so you may not have had a chance to watch it no I haven't had the chance to watch that but I watched the teaching of the soul

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episode eight and it took me actually quite a while I think it's been a pretty busy week.

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And so I've, and I've had, I've had taken chunks in at a time because there was just so many things and also questions came up but I watched that one.

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And I think

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I don't know I've just been kind of a bit overwhelmed with a lot of things and haven't felt like I've been able to take in.

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Like, compared to like I've been busy and also haven't been able to take in everything so like I'm watching, listening to it. And then after 10 minutes I'm like I need a break like what is she saying.

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Like I'm in a state of overwhelmedness so I can't really take in all of it. Yeah. And then, and since I kind of don't like to just listen to listen, then I rather want to spend more time on little.

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Yeah, it's good.

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So that's I think, well, there has been things that's been really good.

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I had a situation in the classroom in ninth grade on Monday like yesterday, where I felt like I was about to lose control and I was stressing out about the pupils and I felt that some of them were being impolite and just saying things that you kind

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of like it hits me in that, like, you feel like you're being disrespectful and they're kind of disguising it as jokes or whatever.

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But what they're really doing is disrespecting you. And I didn't know how to handle it and it kind of hit me. And then I realized, oh my gosh, I can choose to walk and rest in this I can actually have rest right now, even if they're saying these things, and it feels hurtful.

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And, and usually what I've done in the situation is that I put strict boundaries and rules, and for them and for me this is okay this is not okay. But then I kind of felt going into being in rest that, well, that was kind of your old way of handling things and, of course, it's good to set boundaries sometimes and sometimes you have to.

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Yeah, but I felt more like, well, maybe I just need to see them more as Christ do and find another way to love them.

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And since I've been watching, I've been spending like a whole week on watching this one. Yeah. Yeah, like I spent several days on it by just watching 10 minutes, 20 minutes at a time of your teaching, because I think it was one hour 45 minutes.

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And I've been thinking a lot about it. So and also your story there when you're with your workers, and you're being verbally abused.

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They are like, really coming directly a little bit directly a little bit indirectly at me.

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And I could set boundaries and say, that's enough.

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I'm going to talk to your teacher

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or I'm going to discipline you

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or I'm going to do this and this.

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Because I have the authority as a teacher to do that.

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But I just thought that maybe I can do something else,

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something new and kind of just see who Christ sees them

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to be because of course, a lot of it's from them

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is coming from wounds and reacting out of,

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and if I set boundaries and lay down the law,

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I might get it better in the classroom

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but they're not going to change necessarily.

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And we might not connect if they have like a deeper need

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or if they're reacting out of wounds.

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So what I did was that I felt like

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I was able to walk in rest.

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It was, you could feel, I felt stressed

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but I also felt partly in rest, partly in stress.

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And I just handled the situation differently.

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I just heard them out and tried to see them

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and affirm them without putting down the law.

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And afterwards I felt that that was the right decision.

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And it's kind of, I think I'm,

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and I don't know where this is going to lead to

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because it will see, it will,

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I will see how it plays out in the future.

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But I just thought it was an eye opener to me

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that I can deal with things in a different way maybe.

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And that even if I am to the point

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of being verbally abused, this wasn't verbal abuse

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but it was more like subtle attacks.

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I don't have to be afraid.

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And I don't have to protect my soul

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because I am protected already.

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I don't have to, yeah.

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Yeah.

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I don't know if that makes sense.

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Oh yeah, that's perfect.

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That's exactly right.

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I'm so excited for you.

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So I would just even, yeah,

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just like I can do this in a different way

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and maybe I will see more fruit

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in the relationship with the pupils and in them

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than if I'm saying, that's enough, I've had it.

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I'm going to call your parents.

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I'm going to do this.

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I'm going to do that.

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And I thought about it like that I often,

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that what I've done that a lot in the past

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and I think it is to put boundaries and to protect my soul

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because I feel unprotected.

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That's it.

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Yeah, I feel threatened and unprotected

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and actually in a way also by God

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because why isn't he protecting me in the situation?

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So then I myself have to protect my own soul.

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But what I realized on Monday is like, I am protected.

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I can be in rest and I can just love them and be gentle.

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And I was really inspired by your story.

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That's wonderful, I'm so excited for you.

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You can go through that for months.

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Then I can try something new.

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Then I can try to handle the situation differently

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from a place of rest.

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What were you saying about months?

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Now you said that you were going through

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verbal abuse for months.

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Oh that, yes.

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In your story?

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Correct, yeah.

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Like you were being harassed by your boss

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or like your peer?

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Yeah.

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Yeah, and that really inspired me to think that

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and what you said about children,

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they might not have a choice.

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They can't choose a different set of parents,

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but that doesn't mean that God can't protect them.

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They can be in rest, even if the parents are abusive.

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So God must have some way of protecting us

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in extreme situations and not necessarily taking us out

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or us like calling in HR or the principal or parents.

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So then I just thought, oh, I'm gonna try this out.

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Yeah.

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Well, great.

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Well, I don't know if I've mentioned this to you or not,

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but even before God began to teach me about rest in business,

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he taught me how to see people as he sees them

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and interact with them in a different way

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when I had students.

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So it was actually in the classroom first, so to speak.

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Now I didn't have lots of kids,

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but I would teach kids one at a time

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because I was a private tutor for rich kids

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who were kicked out of their schools

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and then their parents were trying to find an alternative.

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And so they would hire the company that I worked for.

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And I had one main student,

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and then I had another one that I kind of like helped

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with certain sessions.

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And then the rest of the time in the evenings, I would have these other students that would

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come in after school, and I would just tutor them in like specific areas, but anyway, I

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had to learn to interact with, God just began to show me how to help a student change by

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actually seeing them for who it is that they were, not seeing them in like all their brokenness

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and all their fear and all their wounds that was causing them to act the way that they

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were, and how to get them to basically rise to my expectations.

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In other words, what it is that I knew that they could do and who it is that I knew it

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is that they were, and the fact that I was investing in that, not something that I wanted

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them to be, but who are they, in other words, what can they do, what, I don't know, and

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how can I encourage them to, I don't know, I don't want to say work harder, but we'll

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use that, work harder to actually operate in, I'm sorry, I'm having a hard time getting

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my words this morning, I guess, but how to get them to put in effort and do what they're

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actually capable of doing, performing at the level that they're capable of performing at,

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that's what I'm trying to say, so anyway, I know what you mean about working with students,

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in other words, working with children who are much younger than you, and how do you

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work with them if they're not adults, and so I love the fact that you decided to try

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a different approach, also, I did that with the other people in that project, you remember

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the project I was telling, I used as an example of where I was being verbally abused by that

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peer, well, there were about 45 people in that project, and they didn't respect me,

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so I had to, especially because of the things that he was saying, and the way he was treating

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me was just kind of like ruining their view of me, even though they liked me as a person,

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they just didn't respect me, and they didn't feel that their jobs were safe with me, in

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other words, that I was going to do a good enough job in leading the project that they

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were going to have, that they were going to keep having the job that would allow them

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to stay in America, they didn't feel like I was a good leader, and that they could entrust

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the success of the project to me, and so the Lord walked me through how to get more,

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how to gain their respect, and it was through something similar to what it is you're doing

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with the students, and that's how I actually gained their respect, and it's the opposite

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of what the world says to do in order to gain respect, the world says, no, you need boundaries,

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you need this, you need that, and while it is true that there is something about boundaries,

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I believe that boundaries are very different than what we are taught that boundaries are,

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boundaries were taught our means of protecting ourselves from other people, like, hey, you're

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not allowed to do this, or I'm going to keep myself safe from all of these other people's

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actions or their interactions with me, and I see boundaries as very different, and my husband was

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actually, but I've struggled to phrase it, and I was like, how would you actually phrase what it is

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that, how I approach boundaries, because I just didn't feel that that was the way that Jesus would

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do it, that Jesus was just, that Jesus had boundaries, and he was trying to protect himself

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from everybody else, and it's like, that doesn't sound like Jesus, that's not what I saw in the

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gospel either, that God, you know, God wasn't afraid of other people, so, and he didn't have

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to, like, protect himself, and the way that I used to describe it to people, as I would say,

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and I was telling my friend this, I said, I said, you know, about, probably about two years ago,

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I was saying, well, you know, I believe very differently about boundaries, I don't believe

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that Jesus had boundaries, and he corrected me, and he's like, oh, no, he said, I completely

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disagree, I think Jesus did have boundaries, and I'm going, I don't see that in scripture,

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but then, finally, what I realized is that, is that, yes, Jesus did have boundaries, but the

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boundaries were not created in order to protect him from other people, the boundaries were what

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my husband's friend.

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described as, as this is what I am willing to do. And this is

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what I'm not willing to do. In other words, it comes from this

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perspective from this inside out perspective, instead of like

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protecting yourself, like coming in. It's more of like, no me

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living on the offensive in life. In other words, me creating my

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life. What do I what am I willing to do? And how am I

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willing to interact with so and so? And what am I not willing to

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do? So it's it's a it's a from it's so the boundary is a very

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healthy is from the is drawn from a very healthy perspective.

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Sorry, let me check and make sure my Yeah, okay, I wanted to

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make sure my my battery was good on my computer. And it wasn't

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gonna like, suddenly, and tell me that it need me to plug it

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in. And so so I do believe that boundaries are good. But I

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believe that the boundaries are from a place where you already

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know, you're not threatened. She know, you're not threatened. How

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do you want to live life? You create the life that you want to

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live, as opposed to what is everyone else doing? And how do

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I need to react? Yeah, it's a very reactive, responsive way to

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life. And it's very exhausting. Because then you feel like you

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always have to be you always have to be vigilant. And, and

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be ready for anything that can be ready to respond to anything

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that that that comes up. And you have to and you're basically it

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makes you feel very out of control of your life. It makes

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you feel like a victim. So instead, I believe that

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boundaries are a bit are are created very naturally, from how

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we desire to from the life that we desire to create for

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ourselves, like, this is what I am willing to do in my life. And

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this is what I'm not willing to do, as opposed to, oh, I don't,

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I want to keep them from doing that to me. And I'm going to

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protect myself from being in that situation. Instead, it's

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like, no, what do I want to do? And then in the mat naturally

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creates boundaries. And so I thought that my the way that my

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husband's friend worded that was, was really was really good.

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Because he told Ed, he said, you know, I used to think of

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boundaries as my way of protecting myself against other

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people. And he said, and I switched my the way that I

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approach things more from no, I know, he didn't use this word,

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but like, I'm not threatened. So how do I as a very strong

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individual, in other words, I own my own life. And owning my

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own life, how do I want to interact? What do I want in my

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life? And what do I not want in my life? And then if you're in

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rest, you are protected. Yeah, you are protected in Jesus.

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Correct. So you don't have to protect yourself. And you don't

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have to feel threatened. Correct, as he provides and

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protects you. Correct. So it's just like, the whole start is

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different. If you're already protected, then why would you

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need boundaries, then? Yeah, but you would still need to find out

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what you want to do and what you don't want to do. Exactly. You

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don't have to. Yeah, because they're like the protection also

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can becomes paralyzing. And like you say, very defensive. Yeah.

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So I mean, I've even I've thought that too. It's

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interesting. I've thought about that. I've, I've been wondering,

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is boundaries really what I've been taught it to be? I've been

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thinking, so that's interesting that it's coming up now. Yeah,

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well, I started to ask questions about it. And thinking, when I

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don't, because when I was in the classroom yesterday, I, when

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they said those things, I felt unprotected. Because I felt

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threatened. But then what I realized is like, but I can have

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rest. And then I'm actually protected. And what am I going

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to do if I'm actually protected, then I don't have to protect

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myself and say, that's enough. You've crossed the boundary. I

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don't have to do that at all. Yeah, it was like, Oh, my gosh,

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I will react differently if I realize I'm already protected.

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Correct. And then the discipline or, you know, of, you know,

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because it's different being a teacher than it is being in

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other situations, like say, for instance, interacting with your

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mom, or whatever, they're in adults, you don't have authority

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over them, you know, but for a kid, it's a bit different in a

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not not just children. But when you are the authority figure,

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there are particular discipline things that you're, that you are

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in the place to and in the position to, to create, but

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discipline.

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plan then doesn't come from feeling threatened, which creates, which if we feel that way,

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if the discipline comes from feeling threatened, then we're very angry. Then we have a tendency

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to blame it on the child and make the child feel really bad for like, and that's how we

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have created our own inferiority complexes in life, because we felt that we were always

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blamed for somebody else feeling threatened by us as children or, you know, whatever.

255
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So we don't want to do that to them. So discipline then comes from the perspective of, okay,

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me not feeling threatened. What is my relationship with this child? What's my responsibility

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to this child? It's to help this child. So what does this child need? And how can I bring

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the kingdom into this classroom? In other words, how do I bring order instead of allowing

259
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chaos to reign or whatever? It doesn't mean that chaos can't reign sometimes, you know,

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sometimes it is, it's messy to walk with people through life, let alone children. It's

261
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just messy. Things aren't clean. They're not always orderly. And you just kind of let it

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be sometimes, but I'm talking about like when you do implement discipline, once you're threatened,

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it comes from a different place. It comes from the place of you as spirit governing

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your aspect of creation, which is that classroom and those children's and those children's souls

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in order to give them a, an environment that's conducive to learning an environment that helps

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them or that kind of calms their soul down, or it helps guide their soul and teach them

267
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in the fact that they don't know that they're having a hard time growing up and learning how

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to live life and, and all this stuff. And so it's messy. And then they're, they feel afraid

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So anyway, there is a place for discipline, but it has to come from a place in order to be

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healthy for the child. It actually, and to actually create something good in that child's

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life, it needs to come from where we're in a place of rest. So we can give them spirit as opposed to

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our flesh because we're afraid or whatever. So that is whenever we do implement discipline,

273
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it's from that it's from that healthy place, because it's not from the place where the teacher

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feels threatened, but from the place where the teacher doesn't feel threatened. And they're just

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implementing things based on what is in bringing in the kingdom, the order of the kingdom and

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whatever, and and helping that child, like what is good for that child. So anyway, it's so when

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you do things from a place of rest and you no longer feel threatened, the boundaries and the

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whole discipline thing still, still is something that is needed, but it's from a totally different

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place. It's not from fear. And so therefore there's therefore there's not that damage

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that can be created in other people's lives or in your relationship with other people

281
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that is when we have, when we operate out of fear and anger and whatever. So anyway,

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I'm really excited for you because it's really, really hard to be where it is that you are.

283
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It is really, really hard when you are transitioning from one mode of operation to another, and you're

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used to trying to control a particular outcome. And so now that you're trying, and so you know

285
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how to do things this way in order to try to get an outcome. Okay, well, you come down harder

286
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and you implement all of these boundaries and you do that. So now trying to do a different

287
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mode of operation is challenging because you're leaving the outcome up to God. And then you feel

288
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out of control. Like, oh my word, are the kids going to just get worse? Are they, you know,

289
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is this as the situation for me going to get worse is, you know, and so, but this is, this is faith.

290
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This is, this is leaving the results up to God. Anyway, sorry, my, my washer stopped and it keeps

291
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beeping. Let me stop the beep. I'll just turn it off real quick.

292
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Sorry that I don't want that. No, no, no, no. Go ahead. What you're saying, because it's not

293
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like you can stop disciplining the child and just like, now we're going to have chaos in the

294
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classroom. So that's not what God means. So it's not like you can go to the other extreme.

295
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But you have to, what is the spirit saying? And it's probably different at different times. So

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what I did say to one of the kids was like, when you say that, maybe it affects me. Maybe if you

297
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word it in a different way, that's kind of also setting, it's not a boundary, but it's kind of

298
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disciplining saying what you're not saying is okay. It's not a boundary.

299
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not okay, or it would be more helpful

300
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if you worded this in that way.

301
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So maybe even, so I don't know if that is what it is,

302
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but it is kind of disciplining them

303
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and saying that I expect more of them

304
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or I think that they can change,

305
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or I think they can react in a different way.

306
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And like coming with suggestion,

307
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maybe if you worded in this way, it will be more helpful

308
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or, and I will understand it more

309
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or it will be a better communication for us.

310
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Yeah.

311
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So I think, I'm just thinking that it will be

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like a learning process because it's not

313
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like you're totally letting go of,

314
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well, you are letting go of control

315
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because you're giving it to God,

316
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but they do need discipline

317
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and they do need to know what's okay and what's not okay.

318
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Yeah.

319
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So it's, it will be interesting to see.

320
00:26:05.460 --> 00:26:06.300
Yeah.

321
00:26:06.300 --> 00:26:07.120
Yeah.

322
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I'm excited for you.

323
00:26:08.500 --> 00:26:09.620
Yeah.

324
00:26:09.620 --> 00:26:10.900
Really excited.

325
00:26:10.900 --> 00:26:14.500
And children respond, well, everyone does,

326
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but just talking about children,

327
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cause it's remarkable to watch how,

328
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I don't know just how they can change so quickly,

329
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but just because they're, they're just in states of,

330
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they're just so flexible as, cause they're learning.

331
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And they, it's interesting to,

332
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to watch how quickly that children change and respond

333
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when they realize that they and your love for them

334
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are the object of why it is you're doing what you're doing.

335
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And it's not you.

336
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Cause if you feel like you've chosen you over them,

337
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then they feel threatened.

338
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But if they feel that they are being chosen over you

339
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in this situation.

340
00:26:57.380 --> 00:26:58.220
Yeah.

341
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And feel loved, seen, significant, you know,

342
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and there's nothing.

343
00:27:03.500 --> 00:27:06.140
That's what I've started to pray these weeks

344
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that I will have,

345
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because I can tell that for some of them, I don't have love.

346
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I get, and then I've been thinking,

347
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I want to have God's love for them

348
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and understand how he sees them.

349
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And I'm just not there in my heart right now

350
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because I don't have a lot of motivation.

351
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So then I thought, okay,

352
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so the profession itself is not motivating me right now

353
00:27:29.780 --> 00:27:32.740
because of many things that I thought I would be

354
00:27:32.740 --> 00:27:34.540
in a different place in my life.

355
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And then I ended up here and it's okay,

356
00:27:37.300 --> 00:27:39.540
but I'm just not motivated.

357
00:27:39.540 --> 00:27:41.780
But then I thought, God, I just,

358
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so I started to pray that God would change my heart

359
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and love them and see them how he sees them.

360
00:27:49.300 --> 00:27:51.580
So I can be motivated by them,

361
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maybe not of the things that I do right now, but by them.

362
00:27:56.900 --> 00:27:57.740
So that will also,

363
00:27:57.740 --> 00:28:01.620
and also that I see that it's a teaching situation for me,

364
00:28:01.620 --> 00:28:04.420
that it's in a situation where I can learn to live and rest

365
00:28:04.420 --> 00:28:07.140
in areas that I've been stressed in before.

366
00:28:07.140 --> 00:28:07.980
Yeah.

367
00:28:07.980 --> 00:28:09.060
And that it's actually,

368
00:28:10.780 --> 00:28:11.980
so in that way,

369
00:28:14.540 --> 00:28:18.220
it's just like a good teaching arena for me.

370
00:28:18.980 --> 00:28:19.900
I can use anything,

371
00:28:19.900 --> 00:28:22.720
even a job that right now is not very motivating.

372
00:28:24.900 --> 00:28:27.460
He can use that to do something in my heart

373
00:28:27.460 --> 00:28:31.740
and even also potentially change some of the pupils.

374
00:28:33.780 --> 00:28:35.020
A couple of things.

375
00:28:35.020 --> 00:28:39.880
One, God is, it's more important to the Lord.

376
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In other words, he,

377
00:28:41.900 --> 00:28:43.440
that's the word that I had come up with

378
00:28:43.440 --> 00:28:44.440
while you were talking,

379
00:28:44.440 --> 00:28:47.460
but it's more important to the Lord

380
00:28:47.500 --> 00:28:52.500
that you live in freedom and have a quality of life

381
00:28:53.300 --> 00:28:55.620
and have a particular quality of life

382
00:28:55.620 --> 00:29:00.140
than to be in a particular place in life,

383
00:29:00.140 --> 00:29:04.060
that maybe the world would view as, I don't know,

384
00:29:04.060 --> 00:29:08.540
as where it is like some milestone or threshold

385
00:29:08.540 --> 00:29:13.080
or standard that you should be at by X age.

386
00:29:14.220 --> 00:29:17.340
We're all feel kind of like threatened by that,

387
00:29:18.180 --> 00:29:19.620
because the world has all of these standards of like,

388
00:29:19.620 --> 00:29:21.300
well, by such and such an age,

389
00:29:21.300 --> 00:29:24.500
you should be so, you'd be such and such a place.

390
00:29:24.500 --> 00:29:27.300
And, you know, when we compare ourselves to that standard,

391
00:29:27.300 --> 00:29:29.860
well, then we can feel really bad about ourselves, right?

392
00:29:29.860 --> 00:29:34.760
And so anyway, the thing is though,

393
00:29:34.760 --> 00:29:39.140
that God is more interested in giving you a quality of life

394
00:29:39.140 --> 00:29:42.020
than having you hit a specific milestone

395
00:29:42.020 --> 00:29:44.220
because that'll make you happier.

396
00:29:44.220 --> 00:29:46.380
So that's what he would desire to do

397
00:29:46.420 --> 00:29:48.980
in where it is that you are right now.

398
00:29:48.980 --> 00:29:50.940
It is giving you that quality,

399
00:29:50.940 --> 00:29:54.740
is helping to, is freeing you from all of the ways

400
00:29:54.740 --> 00:29:57.100
in which you've just felt in bondage.

401
00:29:57.100 --> 00:29:59.900
In other words, he wants to give you.

402
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:08.760
or self back because you've been owned by, by feelings or fear or your

403
00:30:08.760 --> 00:30:13.560
situations or other people or other people's expectations, and he wants

404
00:30:13.560 --> 00:30:15.560
to give you back to you.

405
00:30:16.280 --> 00:30:17.440
And so there's that.

406
00:30:17.720 --> 00:30:22.280
Um, and, and, and so it's not that he doesn't have other stuff for you later.

407
00:30:22.280 --> 00:30:25.320
It's just that, okay, well, where are you right now?

408
00:30:25.360 --> 00:30:28.880
And then why hasn't God moved you onto something else?

409
00:30:29.160 --> 00:30:32.840
Cause he's like, yeah, but I want to focus on giving, I want to give you

410
00:30:33.000 --> 00:30:38.960
something more precious than a specific type of job or specific type of lifestyle.

411
00:30:38.960 --> 00:30:41.880
I want to give you yourself where you get to own you again.

412
00:30:42.440 --> 00:30:47.960
And then once you own you, then you and he can then move on into something else.

413
00:30:48.000 --> 00:30:49.440
Sorry, I've got some allergies.

414
00:30:49.440 --> 00:30:51.720
And so my eyes are kind of really itchy.

415
00:30:52.120 --> 00:30:55.840
Um, but then y'all can then decide, okay, well, what kind of

416
00:30:55.840 --> 00:30:56.960
a life do you want to create?

417
00:30:57.160 --> 00:30:58.800
But you have to like own yourself first.

418
00:30:58.800 --> 00:31:01.680
And so the Lord wants to get, I believe that the Lord wants to give you that.

419
00:31:02.080 --> 00:31:10.760
The other thing is that you're, you aren't behind, you are where the Lord.

420
00:31:11.360 --> 00:31:17.240
Um, you're where the Lord you're doing what it is that the Lord has pitched,

421
00:31:17.280 --> 00:31:22.360
has created you for, which is developing relationship with him, not arriving

422
00:31:22.360 --> 00:31:26.600
somewhere in your relationship with him, just developing the relationship.

423
00:31:26.720 --> 00:31:31.920
And governing creation and the aspect of creation that you've been given to

424
00:31:31.920 --> 00:31:36.520
govern has been multiple areas of life, but, uh, you know, it's your relationships

425
00:31:36.520 --> 00:31:40.840
with other people and, um, they can be, they're greatly affected by you, you

426
00:31:40.840 --> 00:31:42.360
know, your family and all of that.

427
00:31:42.600 --> 00:31:46.120
And so you can bring by all of the pioneering work that you're doing in the

428
00:31:46.120 --> 00:31:49.160
spirit, it can help and benefit all of them.

429
00:31:49.440 --> 00:31:55.400
So not only that, but specifically talking about your classroom and your kids, you

430
00:31:55.440 --> 00:32:00.840
are God's teaching you how to govern creation and bring spirit into the earth.

431
00:32:00.840 --> 00:32:02.040
So it changes the earth.

432
00:32:02.320 --> 00:32:04.200
So it changes these kids lives.

433
00:32:04.480 --> 00:32:08.000
So that maybe puts them on a different direct trajectory.

434
00:32:08.040 --> 00:32:11.600
It, it, it heals them, um, a lot of their wounds.

435
00:32:11.640 --> 00:32:14.400
It helps them feel significant.

436
00:32:14.720 --> 00:32:17.480
And that was what it is that I poured a lot into my students.

437
00:32:17.480 --> 00:32:24.240
So what I chose, what I chose to focus on is making them feel not making them feel.

438
00:32:24.400 --> 00:32:29.440
It's like, as if it was about the feelings, but helping them realize that

439
00:32:29.440 --> 00:32:35.680
they are, that they are actually significant as human beings and that

440
00:32:35.680 --> 00:32:40.080
they deserve my respect, that they deserve to be treated with dignity.

441
00:32:40.520 --> 00:32:44.920
And I couldn't just tell them that I had to believe it and I

442
00:32:44.920 --> 00:32:47.680
had to give it them of myself.

443
00:32:48.040 --> 00:32:51.480
I couldn't just tell them, oh, you need to believe in yourself and you need to,

444
00:32:51.800 --> 00:32:55.560
you need to, um, you know, oh, you're this and you're wonderful on whatever.

445
00:32:55.760 --> 00:33:00.680
But if I didn't really think that they were wonderful and treat them like that,

446
00:33:00.880 --> 00:33:01.960
then they don't believe me.

447
00:33:02.120 --> 00:33:03.120
It's just all words.

448
00:33:03.520 --> 00:33:05.360
I had to really, truly.

449
00:33:05.920 --> 00:33:09.960
In order for, if we want something for someone else, we have

450
00:33:09.960 --> 00:33:11.600
to change and give it to them.

451
00:33:12.160 --> 00:33:17.080
And that's very, very, very hard, very hard, especially when they're

452
00:33:17.080 --> 00:33:18.760
presenting the opposite to you.

453
00:33:19.640 --> 00:33:24.880
They're presenting themselves as this broken person who isn't accomplishing

454
00:33:24.880 --> 00:33:27.120
much and isn't doing their homework.

455
00:33:27.160 --> 00:33:28.200
It isn't obeying.

456
00:33:28.240 --> 00:33:31.920
All we can see is if we're, if we view it through the eyes of the flesh,

457
00:33:31.920 --> 00:33:34.480
we're just like, oh my word, they're just rebellious on my word.

458
00:33:34.480 --> 00:33:35.880
They're on their way to jail.

459
00:33:36.200 --> 00:33:38.280
They are there on this trajectory.

460
00:33:38.280 --> 00:33:43.840
And eventually they're going to prison or, you know, that if we don't, if we

461
00:33:43.840 --> 00:33:46.800
don't see them through the eyes of the flesh and we see them through the eyes

462
00:33:46.840 --> 00:33:51.440
of the spirit, and therefore we interact with them like that, that

463
00:33:51.440 --> 00:33:53.600
literally will change them.

464
00:33:53.640 --> 00:33:55.480
It will literally change their trajectory.

465
00:33:55.520 --> 00:33:55.840
Yes.

466
00:33:55.840 --> 00:33:59.200
They have a free will and they can choose whether how they want to respond to it.

467
00:33:59.600 --> 00:34:06.320
But most of the time, most of the time, by my experience, because of how God

468
00:34:06.320 --> 00:34:12.679
created, uh, you know, creation to respond to himself, they will change.

469
00:34:12.960 --> 00:34:15.920
Now they'll all change in different measures and at different times.

470
00:34:15.920 --> 00:34:19.120
Sometimes all it does is it plants a seed that you don't get to see the

471
00:34:19.120 --> 00:34:20.880
harvest of for a while or whatever.

472
00:34:21.199 --> 00:34:26.199
But I noticed a shocking change in my students, shocking.

473
00:34:26.400 --> 00:34:31.239
In fact, people, people were, I don't know, people were just blown away at how,

474
00:34:31.280 --> 00:34:34.400
at how the kids, you know, were changing and were being affected.

475
00:34:35.000 --> 00:34:40.639
Um, and it was just because I let them because of how I interacted with them.

476
00:34:41.280 --> 00:34:45.639
Well, then they began to see themselves the way that I saw them.

477
00:34:46.400 --> 00:34:51.719
So the way that I talk to you, talk about it is like, if I want, if someone is

478
00:34:51.719 --> 00:34:56.560
presenting themselves in their soul or in their body, then I, and if I want

479
00:34:56.560 --> 00:34:59.720
something different for them, I want them to see who it is that they are in.

480
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:04.880
spirit, even if they're not believers, they still have a spirit, you know, God says that,

481
00:35:04.880 --> 00:35:09.760
that, uh, you know, our spirit is dead until we've been, you know, reunited with Christ

482
00:35:09.760 --> 00:35:16.460
and all of that, but they still have a spirit and that's still who God created them ultimately

483
00:35:16.460 --> 00:35:20.160
to be and where their identity actually sits.

484
00:35:20.160 --> 00:35:21.160
They're just don't know it.

485
00:35:21.160 --> 00:35:23.600
And so they're not acting from that.

486
00:35:23.600 --> 00:35:29.840
So anyway, they, if I want them to start acting like this and to see themselves like

487
00:35:29.840 --> 00:35:36.840
that, but all they are seeing and acting like is this, I have to shift where I see myself

488
00:35:36.840 --> 00:35:38.600
first.

489
00:35:38.600 --> 00:35:40.880
I have to see myself as spirit.

490
00:35:40.880 --> 00:35:47.280
And then once I'm in spirit, then I naturally very effortlessly see them as spirit.

491
00:35:47.280 --> 00:35:51.880
That's how we can see who somebody else is, is we have to see ourselves there first.

492
00:35:51.880 --> 00:35:53.440
We have to give it to ourselves first.

493
00:35:53.480 --> 00:35:56.000
It's like putting on your own oxygen mask first.

494
00:35:56.000 --> 00:36:02.840
So you put that on first, then you very effortlessly see the other person like that, because that's

495
00:36:02.840 --> 00:36:04.760
where you've shifted up into that.

496
00:36:04.760 --> 00:36:06.800
So that's not how you see the world.

497
00:36:06.800 --> 00:36:10.320
You see the world through spirit because you now choose that that's who it is that you

498
00:36:10.320 --> 00:36:13.320
are and you naturally see everybody else like that.

499
00:36:13.320 --> 00:36:18.520
You see, and remember that the way that you shift up there is to believe that God is who

500
00:36:18.520 --> 00:36:21.320
he says that he is to the degree he says he is that.

501
00:36:21.320 --> 00:36:22.360
So who does he say?

502
00:36:22.360 --> 00:36:24.240
He says, he's good.

503
00:36:24.240 --> 00:36:25.440
He says, he's love.

504
00:36:25.440 --> 00:36:26.440
He says, he's protector.

505
00:36:26.440 --> 00:36:27.440
He's provider.

506
00:36:27.440 --> 00:36:28.800
You don't have to do all those things for yourself.

507
00:36:28.800 --> 00:36:29.800
You're not abandoned.

508
00:36:29.800 --> 00:36:31.440
You're not alone and whatever.

509
00:36:31.440 --> 00:36:36.000
And then you start seeing the rest of the world through the eyes of the fact God is

510
00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:37.240
good.

511
00:36:37.240 --> 00:36:38.240
God is love.

512
00:36:38.240 --> 00:36:39.240
He's protector.

513
00:36:39.240 --> 00:36:40.240
He's provider.

514
00:36:40.240 --> 00:36:44.000
So it helps you see everybody else differently because you're seeing it through.

515
00:36:44.000 --> 00:36:48.840
You're seeing the world through the lens of God's character, your creation and other people's

516
00:36:48.840 --> 00:36:52.080
souls to the lens of God's character anyway.

517
00:36:52.800 --> 00:36:57.080
So you view other people and you see them in their soul, then that's how you interact

518
00:36:57.080 --> 00:36:58.760
with them.

519
00:36:58.760 --> 00:37:02.760
Interact with them as if this is who they are, because that is who they are instead

520
00:37:02.760 --> 00:37:08.200
of there's instead of the broken person that they're presenting themselves as they're being

521
00:37:08.200 --> 00:37:09.200
rebellious.

522
00:37:09.200 --> 00:37:10.200
They're being disrespectful.

523
00:37:10.200 --> 00:37:12.480
They, they aren't doing their homework.

524
00:37:12.480 --> 00:37:17.520
They're not applying themselves, you know, but if you always, that might, that's still

525
00:37:17.520 --> 00:37:18.520
true.

526
00:37:18.520 --> 00:37:21.240
You know, so we never want to deny reality.

527
00:37:21.400 --> 00:37:22.960
So yeah, my kids did all that too.

528
00:37:22.960 --> 00:37:27.760
They didn't do their own work sometimes and they, they didn't apply themselves or they

529
00:37:27.760 --> 00:37:32.360
gave me attitude or they whatever, you know, they would do that.

530
00:37:32.360 --> 00:37:36.760
But I consistently saw them like this.

531
00:37:36.760 --> 00:37:42.960
And then because I saw them like that, it's, and that's who I, how I interacted with them

532
00:37:42.960 --> 00:37:48.400
as I didn't interact with them like this because if I interact with them like this, it affirms

533
00:37:48.400 --> 00:37:50.120
to them that this is who they are.

534
00:37:50.440 --> 00:37:52.120
They're like, see, yeah, see that.

535
00:37:52.120 --> 00:37:53.120
That is who I am.

536
00:37:53.120 --> 00:37:59.120
That's how that, because they're, yeah, because children are always looking at the world.

537
00:37:59.120 --> 00:38:04.280
Well, all people are, but just talking specifically about children, they look at other people,

538
00:38:04.280 --> 00:38:09.600
specifically adults to kind of figure out based on how other people interact with them.

539
00:38:09.600 --> 00:38:10.600
Who am I?

540
00:38:10.600 --> 00:38:16.840
We have a bad tendency to identify ourselves according to how other people interact with

541
00:38:16.840 --> 00:38:17.840
us.

542
00:38:17.840 --> 00:38:18.840
And so kids are no different.

543
00:38:18.840 --> 00:38:19.840
They're doing the same thing.

544
00:38:20.560 --> 00:38:23.400
They're wondering, who does my teacher say that I am now?

545
00:38:23.400 --> 00:38:24.400
It's all subconscious.

546
00:38:24.400 --> 00:38:27.760
They don't know they're doing it, but that's, that's how they react.

547
00:38:27.760 --> 00:38:33.680
So anyway, if you, if you interact with them like this, then, then eventually it's almost

548
00:38:33.680 --> 00:38:40.720
like you call their, you know, how God gives us all like our, our own secret name between

549
00:38:40.720 --> 00:38:41.720
he and us.

550
00:38:41.720 --> 00:38:46.720
Remember, it says that in the Bible, it says, you know, I've given you a special name.

551
00:38:46.720 --> 00:38:51.400
I think he said that he's written it on a stone, you know, and it's his own name for

552
00:38:51.400 --> 00:38:52.400
us.

553
00:38:52.400 --> 00:38:57.480
Uh, and nobody knows it, but he and us, um, and, and I don't remember where that is.

554
00:38:57.480 --> 00:39:00.720
I don't remember if it's in revelation or what, but anyway, it says that God has given

555
00:39:00.720 --> 00:39:04.200
us all our own special name.

556
00:39:04.200 --> 00:39:11.280
So it's as if you're calling out this name and they, because you're, you're shining,

557
00:39:11.280 --> 00:39:16.440
you're shining a flashlight on this part of themselves that was in the dark, that they

558
00:39:16.440 --> 00:39:23.120
didn't know that they were, but when you shine your light on it, because it is them, it's

559
00:39:23.120 --> 00:39:26.500
like they, they, they recognize it.

560
00:39:26.500 --> 00:39:29.540
They recognize that that's them, but no one's ever shined.

561
00:39:29.540 --> 00:39:34.240
They didn't know it was there, but once you show them it's there, they feel connected

562
00:39:34.240 --> 00:39:35.240
to it.

563
00:39:35.240 --> 00:39:37.800
They're like, well, she called my name.

564
00:39:37.800 --> 00:39:39.640
No one's ever called my name before.

565
00:39:39.640 --> 00:39:46.040
You know, it's, they feel they, it feels right, but no one's ever treated them like that.

566
00:39:46.040 --> 00:39:49.960
No one's ever shown them that that's who they were, you know, or whatever anyway.

567
00:39:49.960 --> 00:39:54.000
So when you shine your light on it and then they realize that that is a part of who it

568
00:39:54.000 --> 00:39:59.840
is that they are over time, they start rising very naturally to that position.

569
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:01.680
And they start acting like that.

570
00:40:01.680 --> 00:40:05.640
They start acting more out of who it is that they really are,

571
00:40:05.640 --> 00:40:08.920
because that is who it is that you consistently

572
00:40:08.920 --> 00:40:13.240
choose to interact with, is the spirit, not this.

573
00:40:13.240 --> 00:40:15.440
Now, it doesn't mean that you're ignoring this.

574
00:40:15.440 --> 00:40:17.640
I mean, you're fully aware that all this is going on.

575
00:40:17.640 --> 00:40:21.040
But you interact with them from the perspective

576
00:40:21.040 --> 00:40:24.400
that they really are good, because they're

577
00:40:24.400 --> 00:40:26.160
made in the image of God.

578
00:40:26.160 --> 00:40:30.760
So deep down, their identity reflects the goodness of God.

579
00:40:30.760 --> 00:40:32.080
It reflects God's love.

580
00:40:32.080 --> 00:40:34.760
It reflects God's provision, God's protection.

581
00:40:34.760 --> 00:40:36.520
They're just not acting like it.

582
00:40:36.520 --> 00:40:39.200
They just aren't getting to live the benefits

583
00:40:39.200 --> 00:40:42.400
of God's inheritance, because they're not believing it.

584
00:40:42.400 --> 00:40:45.160
So this is still going on.

585
00:40:45.160 --> 00:40:46.840
But this is still true.

586
00:40:46.840 --> 00:40:50.720
So anyway, and it will cause people to change.

587
00:40:50.720 --> 00:40:53.680
And so that's how our interaction with them

588
00:40:53.680 --> 00:40:58.520
can cause children or other people

589
00:40:58.520 --> 00:41:00.800
to start changing their behavior.

590
00:41:00.800 --> 00:41:05.640
We start seeing them as who it is that they really are.

591
00:41:05.640 --> 00:41:09.160
But as is like what you put into practice,

592
00:41:09.160 --> 00:41:11.040
the only way that you can do that

593
00:41:11.040 --> 00:41:13.240
is if you do it to yourself first.

594
00:41:13.240 --> 00:41:14.880
I'm not threatened.

595
00:41:14.880 --> 00:41:17.280
I am who God says that I am.

596
00:41:17.280 --> 00:41:19.520
We have to do it for ourselves first.

597
00:41:19.520 --> 00:41:21.680
We have to put on our own oxygen mask first,

598
00:41:21.680 --> 00:41:23.440
see us how God sees us.

599
00:41:23.480 --> 00:41:25.640
Then we can see the kids like that.

600
00:41:25.640 --> 00:41:29.480
We can't see the kids and interact with them like that

601
00:41:29.480 --> 00:41:31.640
unless we do it first to ourselves,

602
00:41:31.640 --> 00:41:35.600
because otherwise we can't see in the spirit.

603
00:41:35.600 --> 00:41:38.720
We can't see who it is that they are in spirit.

604
00:41:38.720 --> 00:41:41.480
We have to see and interact with that.

605
00:41:41.480 --> 00:41:44.200
We have to see ourselves like that first.

606
00:41:44.200 --> 00:41:46.440
And then it calls to them.

607
00:41:46.440 --> 00:41:48.680
It gives that soul an opportunity

608
00:41:48.680 --> 00:41:51.480
to hear another son of God talking to it

609
00:41:51.480 --> 00:41:53.200
and choose to respond.

610
00:41:53.960 --> 00:41:55.600
Anyway, it's very powerful.

611
00:41:55.600 --> 00:41:57.000
Does that all make sense?

612
00:41:58.240 --> 00:41:59.080
It does.

613
00:41:59.080 --> 00:42:00.640
I don't know where I'm at myself

614
00:42:00.640 --> 00:42:04.640
because I think I struggle to see them,

615
00:42:04.640 --> 00:42:06.080
not see myself.

616
00:42:06.080 --> 00:42:06.920
The way God sees me,

617
00:42:06.920 --> 00:42:09.200
that's like a big part of the problem.

618
00:42:09.200 --> 00:42:12.360
But I think I noticed when they were coming at me,

619
00:42:12.360 --> 00:42:14.480
the former story a few weeks ago.

620
00:42:15.560 --> 00:42:17.880
And I just said, I'm sorry.

621
00:42:17.880 --> 00:42:20.640
And I asked for forgiveness and it totally threw them off

622
00:42:20.680 --> 00:42:22.920
because I thought I was gonna protect myself.

623
00:42:22.920 --> 00:42:25.560
And then I told them and I asked them,

624
00:42:33.560 --> 00:42:35.040
why didn't you trust me in this?

625
00:42:35.040 --> 00:42:37.960
Why did you get so upset and mad at me

626
00:42:37.960 --> 00:42:39.160
for making this mistake?

627
00:42:39.160 --> 00:42:42.120
And I said, don't you know that I want the best for you

628
00:42:42.120 --> 00:42:44.400
and that I believe in you?

629
00:42:44.400 --> 00:42:47.400
And that I felt changed something

630
00:42:47.920 --> 00:42:52.080
that they, because they weren't sure about me,

631
00:42:52.080 --> 00:42:53.520
they wanted to attack me

632
00:42:53.520 --> 00:42:56.360
because they felt hurt and threatened or something.

633
00:42:56.360 --> 00:42:58.920
And then when I asked for forgiveness,

634
00:42:58.920 --> 00:43:00.800
that totally threw them off.

635
00:43:00.800 --> 00:43:02.680
And then I said, I believe in you.

636
00:43:02.680 --> 00:43:06.520
Why would you be so uncertain about me?

637
00:43:06.520 --> 00:43:08.640
Why wouldn't you trust me?

638
00:43:08.640 --> 00:43:10.800
That I want the best for you.

639
00:43:10.800 --> 00:43:14.280
And I actually think that that really,

640
00:43:14.280 --> 00:43:16.320
that that did something.

641
00:43:16.320 --> 00:43:18.640
Just saying, and I could tell when I said

642
00:43:18.640 --> 00:43:23.640
that it was impactful that I said that I believe in you.

643
00:43:24.120 --> 00:43:25.400
And I think that's a little bit

644
00:43:25.400 --> 00:43:26.760
what you're saying right now,

645
00:43:26.760 --> 00:43:29.560
because when I'm saying that I believe in you,

646
00:43:29.560 --> 00:43:32.040
I'm saying that I see something in them

647
00:43:32.040 --> 00:43:33.720
that maybe they haven't seen themselves

648
00:43:33.720 --> 00:43:36.760
because a lot of them don't believe in themselves.

649
00:43:36.760 --> 00:43:40.040
And then they hear me saying, I believe in you.

650
00:43:40.040 --> 00:43:43.160
And then maybe that could call forth something

651
00:43:43.160 --> 00:43:45.120
that they're actually seeing that someone believes in them,

652
00:43:45.120 --> 00:43:47.920
even though they might not be performing to the standard

653
00:43:47.920 --> 00:43:49.000
they know they should.

654
00:43:49.960 --> 00:43:51.880
But I still said that I believed in them

655
00:43:51.880 --> 00:43:54.640
after they just had attacked me.

656
00:43:54.640 --> 00:43:59.640
Yeah, so you showed that you treated them

657
00:44:00.240 --> 00:44:03.880
with significance and dignity as individuals

658
00:44:03.880 --> 00:44:07.760
and that they could affect you.

659
00:44:07.760 --> 00:44:09.240
And you showed that they,

660
00:44:09.240 --> 00:44:11.040
in other words, that they were powerful.

661
00:44:11.040 --> 00:44:13.840
They were powerful enough to affect a teacher

662
00:44:14.480 --> 00:44:18.280
and an adult and that you made yourself vulnerable to them.

663
00:44:19.320 --> 00:44:22.960
And again, it shows them respect.

664
00:44:22.960 --> 00:44:26.680
And so it shows that you treated them with value

665
00:44:26.680 --> 00:44:29.960
as individuals, as opposed to second-class citizens

666
00:44:29.960 --> 00:44:31.960
because they're kids.

667
00:44:31.960 --> 00:44:36.120
So that they were on equal footing with you in value.

668
00:44:36.120 --> 00:44:38.000
And that spoke a lot to them.

669
00:44:38.000 --> 00:44:39.960
Not equal footing as in authority.

670
00:44:39.960 --> 00:44:41.800
You had authority, but they don't.

671
00:44:41.800 --> 00:44:43.640
But in the value as a human being,

672
00:44:44.440 --> 00:44:45.280
just because people are younger

673
00:44:45.280 --> 00:44:46.760
doesn't make them less valuable.

674
00:44:46.760 --> 00:44:48.640
They're exactly the same value.

675
00:44:48.640 --> 00:44:49.960
So, yeah.

676
00:44:49.960 --> 00:44:54.280
But I think my struggle is to believe about myself.

677
00:44:54.280 --> 00:44:57.760
And like you say, that that is actually

678
00:44:57.760 --> 00:44:59.200
the first thing that comes.

679
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:02.520
That was everyone's hardest, is themselves.

680
00:45:03.480 --> 00:45:04.320
Yeah.

681
00:45:04.320 --> 00:45:06.560
To believe that, because now I'm often saying,

682
00:45:06.560 --> 00:45:11.000
I believe, or I choose you,

683
00:45:11.000 --> 00:45:15.100
and I choose that you are who you say you are.

684
00:45:15.100 --> 00:45:17.400
And that is easier for me to believe

685
00:45:17.400 --> 00:45:21.620
than I choose that I am who you say I am.

686
00:45:22.640 --> 00:45:25.800
Yeah, that's very, I find that hard.

687
00:45:25.800 --> 00:45:28.920
And I think that's like a root problem in my life,

688
00:45:28.960 --> 00:45:31.760
like a deep sense of condemnation

689
00:45:31.760 --> 00:45:34.400
and like almost like a hatred against yourself

690
00:45:34.400 --> 00:45:36.280
or a kind of like attacking yourself.

691
00:45:37.920 --> 00:45:41.600
And that makes me end up in a lot of condemnation

692
00:45:41.600 --> 00:45:43.360
and guilt and shame.

693
00:45:43.360 --> 00:45:46.280
And I kind of don't know how to break free from that

694
00:45:46.280 --> 00:45:49.400
because that's like the second part of believing God

695
00:45:49.400 --> 00:45:52.080
that he says he is who he says he is.

696
00:45:52.080 --> 00:45:54.800
But the other part is to believe what he says about me.

697
00:45:54.800 --> 00:45:55.720
Yeah.

698
00:45:55.720 --> 00:46:00.520
And I think I find that challenging.

699
00:46:01.720 --> 00:46:02.800
Yeah.

700
00:46:02.800 --> 00:46:04.640
Yeah, it is.

701
00:46:04.640 --> 00:46:06.400
It is very challenging.

702
00:46:06.400 --> 00:46:10.000
Again, God's just like, okay, faith.

703
00:46:11.800 --> 00:46:15.120
You choose that what I say about you is true,

704
00:46:15.120 --> 00:46:19.360
even if there's no, even if you can't see evidence,

705
00:46:19.360 --> 00:46:21.400
even if it doesn't make any sense

706
00:46:21.400 --> 00:46:23.440
because you can't see how it's possibly true.

707
00:46:23.440 --> 00:46:25.000
You don't feel that way.

708
00:46:25.000 --> 00:46:27.400
You know certain things about yourself that you think,

709
00:46:27.400 --> 00:46:29.160
well, surely if these things are in me,

710
00:46:29.160 --> 00:46:32.480
or if these things, if I act in these ways,

711
00:46:32.480 --> 00:46:34.440
or if I have acted in these ways,

712
00:46:34.440 --> 00:46:38.440
surely it means that I'm not as good as God says

713
00:46:38.440 --> 00:46:39.680
that I actually am.

714
00:46:39.680 --> 00:46:42.120
And God's like, yeah, but what did I say?

715
00:46:42.120 --> 00:46:43.520
And so that is really faith.

716
00:46:43.520 --> 00:46:46.360
It's like, it doesn't make any sense to us.

717
00:46:46.360 --> 00:46:47.960
And yet God says it's true.

718
00:46:47.960 --> 00:46:49.800
And we have to choose that it's true

719
00:46:49.800 --> 00:46:53.560
in the face of what feels like

720
00:46:55.080 --> 00:46:57.800
a opposite evidence.

721
00:46:58.800 --> 00:47:02.480
So I just choose it until I believe it.

722
00:47:02.480 --> 00:47:03.480
You what?

723
00:47:03.480 --> 00:47:06.000
I can just choose it until I believe it?

724
00:47:06.000 --> 00:47:06.840
Yes.

725
00:47:06.840 --> 00:47:10.520
So the way that faith works is you choose it first

726
00:47:10.520 --> 00:47:12.920
as in you have to, it's an act of your will.

727
00:47:12.920 --> 00:47:15.720
Now I've talked a bit about it.

728
00:47:17.760 --> 00:47:18.960
Yeah, yeah, you have.

729
00:47:20.040 --> 00:47:20.880
Yeah.

730
00:47:21.720 --> 00:47:24.920
Where did I, where did I talk about it?

731
00:47:26.480 --> 00:47:27.480
Oh my goodness.

732
00:47:28.400 --> 00:47:30.200
Maybe in one of those, okay.

733
00:47:30.200 --> 00:47:31.480
I don't know if you've seen this,

734
00:47:31.480 --> 00:47:35.440
but if you go back to the rest intensive,

735
00:47:35.440 --> 00:47:36.680
you know, not the rest lifestyle,

736
00:47:36.680 --> 00:47:38.840
the rest intensive, the one we just finished,

737
00:47:38.840 --> 00:47:42.040
I added more supportive teachings.

738
00:47:42.040 --> 00:47:43.360
So you can go.

739
00:47:43.360 --> 00:47:44.920
Yeah, did you see any of those?

740
00:47:45.840 --> 00:47:48.200
No, I just saw that you put something out.

741
00:47:48.200 --> 00:47:49.040
Okay.

742
00:47:49.040 --> 00:47:50.320
So yeah, so I added more.

743
00:47:50.720 --> 00:47:54.080
So if you go to the old, not the Facebook group,

744
00:47:54.080 --> 00:47:56.920
the rest intensive webpage, you know,

745
00:47:56.920 --> 00:47:59.080
members webpage, go there.

746
00:47:59.080 --> 00:48:01.360
I finally, it took me a long time,

747
00:48:01.360 --> 00:48:04.760
but I finally added all of the supportive teachings

748
00:48:04.760 --> 00:48:07.080
that I had put in the Facebook group.

749
00:48:07.080 --> 00:48:09.520
I added those to that page.

750
00:48:09.520 --> 00:48:11.760
So it might be easier for you to find.

751
00:48:11.760 --> 00:48:14.520
They were all, well, I didn't add all of them

752
00:48:14.520 --> 00:48:15.360
from the Facebook group.

753
00:48:15.360 --> 00:48:18.880
I just added the ones that were a part

754
00:48:18.920 --> 00:48:21.040
of this past six weeks.

755
00:48:21.040 --> 00:48:23.080
Anything that any questions that were asked

756
00:48:23.080 --> 00:48:24.800
that I answered in a video,

757
00:48:24.800 --> 00:48:28.880
I put under supportive teachings in that webpage.

758
00:48:28.880 --> 00:48:32.920
So I think that maybe those might be helpful

759
00:48:32.920 --> 00:48:35.920
because they were, and they were teachings

760
00:48:35.920 --> 00:48:40.840
in answer to either where people were at that time

761
00:48:40.840 --> 00:48:42.920
or questions that people had asked.

762
00:48:42.920 --> 00:48:45.560
So anyway, my point is that there might be something

763
00:48:45.560 --> 00:48:47.120
about like choosing in there and whatever,

764
00:48:47.120 --> 00:48:48.160
and what the difference is.

765
00:48:48.160 --> 00:48:52.680
So the way that faith works is that eventually,

766
00:48:52.680 --> 00:48:54.280
now I may have told you all of this,

767
00:48:54.280 --> 00:48:56.640
but I'll walk back through it again

768
00:48:56.640 --> 00:48:59.760
because there's a part of it that I want to explain

769
00:48:59.760 --> 00:49:00.800
that maybe I haven't before,

770
00:49:00.800 --> 00:49:03.520
because you're asking about choosing versus believing.

771
00:49:04.480 --> 00:49:06.760
And I wish I had a piece of paper, but anyway.

772
00:49:06.760 --> 00:49:11.760
Okay, so you've got proof, belief, and choosing.

773
00:49:14.960 --> 00:49:16.240
Now I've already explained this.

774
00:49:17.120 --> 00:49:19.040
You've probably already heard me talk about it.

775
00:49:19.040 --> 00:49:23.320
Because I talked about it when I did the interview

776
00:49:23.320 --> 00:49:26.040
with Lindsay, because I walked through this.

777
00:49:26.040 --> 00:49:29.040
And so there's proof, belief, and choosing.

778
00:49:29.040 --> 00:49:30.680
And the choosing again is faith,

779
00:49:30.680 --> 00:49:33.560
but I use choosing because I'm trying to teach

780
00:49:33.560 --> 00:49:36.000
what faith is and I need to use new words

781
00:49:36.000 --> 00:49:39.720
so that we understand that faith has a different meaning

782
00:49:39.720 --> 00:49:41.040
than we thought that it meant.

783
00:49:41.040 --> 00:49:43.440
So anyway, the way that God teaches

784
00:49:43.600 --> 00:49:46.320
how to have faith in him is first,

785
00:49:46.320 --> 00:49:48.240
he gives us lots and lots of proof.

786
00:49:48.240 --> 00:49:49.280
So it's like a kid.

787
00:49:49.280 --> 00:49:51.160
He does everything for us.

788
00:49:51.160 --> 00:49:52.840
He makes all of these things happen

789
00:49:52.840 --> 00:49:56.720
without our interaction, without our participation.

790
00:49:56.720 --> 00:49:58.520
And we see all these miracles

791
00:49:58.520 --> 00:50:00.720
and we see all this whatever, and we're like.

792
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:04.320
Oh, my warrior. This is great. And then God said, okay, do you see all of this proof?

793
00:50:05.040 --> 00:50:09.200
Maybe we see lots of stuff in scripture. Maybe, maybe we see things happen in our lives. Maybe

794
00:50:09.200 --> 00:50:14.160
we see things happen in other people's lives. Lots of evidence, lots of proof. Then from that,

795
00:50:14.160 --> 00:50:22.240
God's like, God says, okay, I, now I want you to see all this evidence. Now believe that I am

796
00:50:23.200 --> 00:50:28.800
who this says that who all this evidence has proven to you that I am. I didn't know that I'm

797
00:50:28.800 --> 00:50:33.840
faithful, that I'm good, that I'm loved, that I protect you, that I provide for you, whatever,

798
00:50:33.840 --> 00:50:37.840
believe it. And we're like, okay, I've seen enough evidence. I'm going to believe it.

799
00:50:38.640 --> 00:50:43.600
But that's still not faith yet because we can believe something and know something and think

800
00:50:43.600 --> 00:50:49.920
that thing is true and yet not believe it enough to want to risk ourselves on it, to step out on

801
00:50:49.920 --> 00:50:55.840
it. You know, where it has, where it's the truth of it has to support us in life. Right. And, and

802
00:50:55.840 --> 00:51:01.760
anyway, we put our own skin in the game. So anyway, after we believe it, we, and then we

803
00:51:01.760 --> 00:51:05.840
got to build up our belief, more proof, more belief, more proof, more belief. And then finally,

804
00:51:05.840 --> 00:51:11.920
he'll ask us, okay, now I want you to act on it, but your money, where your mouth is proved by

805
00:51:11.920 --> 00:51:17.680
works, you know, faith without works is dead. So that's why this isn't faith yet, because there's

806
00:51:17.680 --> 00:51:22.720
no works in it. We're just like telling ourselves that it's true when we're believing it, but we're

807
00:51:22.720 --> 00:51:27.120
not actually acting on it yet. So anyway, God says, okay, but now move this into the faith

808
00:51:27.120 --> 00:51:33.760
category, actually act on it. Like, Oh, that's really hard, but okay. And then, so he teaches

809
00:51:33.760 --> 00:51:38.800
us how to do it. We're like, oh, okay, I'll try. And then, and then we do it. And then, and then

810
00:51:38.800 --> 00:51:44.800
God begins up showing, showing up. Like he said that, that he always did back here where he gave

811
00:51:44.800 --> 00:51:50.160
us all this evidence. We, after we choose that it's true and we act on it, he starts creating

812
00:51:50.240 --> 00:51:54.880
more evidence. You know, we're like, oh my word, it really is true. And this is great. And it builds

813
00:51:54.880 --> 00:51:59.840
our faith. And so we learn how to have faith because we chose and we acted on it, et cetera,

814
00:51:59.840 --> 00:52:06.880
but that's still not full faith because faith is believing some is, is believing or choosing

815
00:52:06.880 --> 00:52:15.120
something without evidence. So eventually after God builds all of this, um, uh, those, this, uh,

816
00:52:15.600 --> 00:52:21.840
I whispered like this history with us, this, um, this, I don't know. Oh, I can't think of the word.

817
00:52:21.840 --> 00:52:26.960
But anyway, all of this evidence, all this history with this, where he's consistently

818
00:52:26.960 --> 00:52:32.320
proven himself to be who he says that he was after he's done all that. Then he'll say, okay, now

819
00:52:32.320 --> 00:52:37.040
I want you to, I want to teach you how to have, how to really have faith. And we're going to skip

820
00:52:37.040 --> 00:52:42.080
the proof. I'm not going to give you any proof. You, you aren't going to believe it.

821
00:52:42.640 --> 00:52:45.280
And I'm asking you to choose it and to act on it anyway.

822
00:52:46.880 --> 00:52:52.400
And so there's no evidence. In fact, all of the evidence seems to support the opposite,

823
00:52:52.400 --> 00:52:58.480
you know, and then you don't believe it. So in other words, you don't, it's not logical

824
00:52:58.480 --> 00:53:05.520
and you don't feel like it. And yet God tells you to choose it. So it's blind. It's just blind

825
00:53:06.320 --> 00:53:11.680
faith. There's it's, um, it's, uh, based on nothing, but the fact that God said,

826
00:53:12.480 --> 00:53:20.000
and then he says, choose that. That's true. Well, once you do that, then what you've done is you've

827
00:53:20.000 --> 00:53:26.240
basically chosen your, that you are the new man. You chose to shift yourself into the spirit and

828
00:53:26.240 --> 00:53:31.840
act like that, you know, act like, okay. God says he's good. God says he's loved. God says

829
00:53:31.840 --> 00:53:36.480
he's protector. He says his provider, he's my safety, et cetera. So all of these things,

830
00:53:37.200 --> 00:53:42.640
once you choose it and you act on it without believing it and without any evidence,

831
00:53:43.440 --> 00:53:48.800
then God, um, what will happen is because you've chosen yourself as the new man

832
00:53:48.800 --> 00:53:52.720
and you start acting like that, the new man always believes his father.

833
00:53:53.280 --> 00:53:58.320
So once you've shifted up into that place of the new man, you naturally come to believe it.

834
00:53:58.800 --> 00:54:06.480
Hmm. And then because you're connected, because you, because you acted on it and you believe it,

835
00:54:07.440 --> 00:54:14.720
it's something that God has said that works together with God to create the evidence.

836
00:54:15.760 --> 00:54:21.280
So now you are partnering with God to actually create the evidence instead of God, always

837
00:54:21.280 --> 00:54:27.200
creating the evidence. Now in a manner of speaking, it's always God in spirit that

838
00:54:27.200 --> 00:54:37.520
creates the evidence manner of speaking, but your faith in it allows it to manifest

839
00:54:37.520 --> 00:54:44.080
and show up on the earth. So think of it kind of like this. Um, and we would talk more about this

840
00:54:44.080 --> 00:54:50.560
on, in the power of intention, which is like session 12. And I know that you've seen them

841
00:54:50.560 --> 00:54:55.760
all already. So I don't, you may remember this, but you remember where I have the stick figures,

842
00:54:55.760 --> 00:54:59.840
the man and the woman. And then I talk about, I talk about conceit.

843
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:09.120
I use the, I use conception of a baby between a man and a woman as similar to faith between

844
00:55:09.120 --> 00:55:15.360
us and the Lord, you know, where God is, is, um, you know, we'll, you know, we'll associate

845
00:55:15.360 --> 00:55:20.920
God with the masculine and then the church or us as the feminine, what in order to create

846
00:55:20.920 --> 00:55:27.200
a baby, God, uh, the, the man's seed can't create the baby by himself.

847
00:55:27.200 --> 00:55:29.320
He just can't.

848
00:55:29.320 --> 00:55:35.400
He can because, because he only contributes one strand of the DNA for a baby.

849
00:55:35.400 --> 00:55:42.040
So he can give the woman his seed and the woman can receive it, but unless if she doesn't

850
00:55:42.040 --> 00:55:49.720
provide her own contribution, which is, you know, the egg, if she doesn't provide that,

851
00:55:49.720 --> 00:55:51.560
well then there's no baby.

852
00:55:51.560 --> 00:55:53.560
So he can initiate.

853
00:55:53.560 --> 00:56:01.320
So like God can give us word, but if the woman, if the woman, if the church, if we

854
00:56:01.320 --> 00:56:07.640
don't actually come into agreement with it of our own free will, because we get to choose

855
00:56:07.640 --> 00:56:11.920
whether or not we're going to receive that as true in our lives, you know, because again,

856
00:56:11.920 --> 00:56:13.800
we can't live vicariously through God's will.

857
00:56:13.800 --> 00:56:14.800
Okay.

858
00:56:14.800 --> 00:56:17.000
God, if you say that it's going to happen, then I guess we'll just make it happen.

859
00:56:17.000 --> 00:56:19.800
God's like, no, no, no, we're doing this together.

860
00:56:19.800 --> 00:56:21.120
Participate with me.

861
00:56:21.120 --> 00:56:23.800
You have to contribute it as well.

862
00:56:23.800 --> 00:56:31.040
And then when you contribute your choice, that what God's word says really is true,

863
00:56:31.040 --> 00:56:34.880
then something can actually manifest into the earth.

864
00:56:34.880 --> 00:56:39.520
Then something can be conceived and the baby can be, and a baby can be created.

865
00:56:39.520 --> 00:56:45.600
So that is how we start getting evidence into the earth that what God says about himself

866
00:56:45.600 --> 00:56:51.600
really is true is because he says that it's so, but we, because we're the gatekeepers

867
00:56:51.600 --> 00:56:58.280
of the kingdom of the earth, so to speak, the kingdom of creation, we have to give authority

868
00:56:58.280 --> 00:56:59.280
to it.

869
00:56:59.280 --> 00:57:08.120
We have to, we, to, to come into the earth and to be allowed to show up.

870
00:57:08.120 --> 00:57:14.800
So until we give authority to it, the king, what God said about himself, can't show up

871
00:57:15.000 --> 00:57:16.560
into the earth.

872
00:57:16.560 --> 00:57:22.520
So if we just sit around waiting for God to prove himself, it's not going to happen.

873
00:57:22.520 --> 00:57:26.800
It did when we were younger in our faith, we, you know, we're young and we don't know

874
00:57:26.800 --> 00:57:27.800
what's going on.

875
00:57:27.800 --> 00:57:32.000
We're a little baby, you know, so to speak, you know, in the spirit and we, you know,

876
00:57:32.000 --> 00:57:33.200
we're new at all of this.

877
00:57:33.200 --> 00:57:37.640
Well, God does everything for us, but what he's teaching us is after we get to be a certain

878
00:57:37.640 --> 00:57:39.560
age, he's like, no, no, no.

879
00:57:39.560 --> 00:57:46.120
In order for those things to happen on earth, you, I'm teaching you how to be a king.

880
00:57:46.120 --> 00:57:48.520
You're not a baby Prince anymore.

881
00:57:48.520 --> 00:57:50.900
I'm teaching you how to rule.

882
00:57:50.900 --> 00:57:59.140
So you have to choose to give me permission for my word to actually create, cause something

883
00:57:59.140 --> 00:58:01.420
to happen in the earth.

884
00:58:01.420 --> 00:58:07.440
In other words, for proof and evidence to occur in order for it to occur, you have,

885
00:58:07.440 --> 00:58:11.280
and you give permission by your faith.

886
00:58:11.280 --> 00:58:16.360
So if we're sitting, so as more mature people in the Lord, if we're sitting around waiting

887
00:58:16.360 --> 00:58:22.560
for evidence before we have faith, then we're acting as if we're still baby princes and

888
00:58:22.560 --> 00:58:25.100
God's like, no, you're not that anymore.

889
00:58:25.100 --> 00:58:30.040
You're going to be waiting for eternity for that evidence, because that evidence you're

890
00:58:30.040 --> 00:58:36.520
so old now in me that that evidence needs your faith in order to be created.

891
00:58:36.600 --> 00:58:39.560
That's how we co-create with God.

892
00:58:39.560 --> 00:58:47.800
So God, just like a man initiates God, everything that originates on earth, that's healthy,

893
00:58:47.800 --> 00:58:50.480
you know, and that's the spirit has to come from God.

894
00:58:50.480 --> 00:58:53.880
God has to have said at first, we don't get to make stuff up.

895
00:58:53.880 --> 00:58:58.640
God has to say it first, but we have to come into agreement with it in order for it to

896
00:58:58.640 --> 00:59:00.260
happen anyway.

897
00:59:00.260 --> 00:59:01.260
So does that make sense?

898
00:59:01.260 --> 00:59:03.540
That's the difference between choice and belief.

899
00:59:03.540 --> 00:59:12.300
And so, yes, you can, you, you can, if you have faith first, you can, then belief will

900
00:59:12.300 --> 00:59:18.080
naturally come because when you choose, you're choosing that you are the new man.

901
00:59:18.080 --> 00:59:19.080
You're choosing that.

902
00:59:19.080 --> 00:59:22.940
God says that what God says about himself really is true, that whatever he's saying

903
00:59:22.940 --> 00:59:27.140
really is true, that whatever he's saying about you really is true.

904
00:59:27.140 --> 00:59:30.540
And then you operate from the place of the new man and the new man always believes his

905
00:59:30.820 --> 00:59:31.820
father.

906
00:59:31.820 --> 00:59:35.500
So the belief comes after the faith.

907
00:59:35.500 --> 00:59:41.420
The belief comes because you chose that it was true first, you didn't choose it because

908
00:59:41.420 --> 00:59:44.340
you believed you chose it.

909
00:59:44.340 --> 00:59:50.340
And then you believed because you chose it'll come afterwards.

910
00:59:50.340 --> 00:59:57.500
Because again, when I'm talking about belief, belief and faith are kind of the same thing,

911
00:59:57.500 --> 01:00:00.060
which is why in the Bible, it talks about sometimes.

912
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:05.120
it says the word faith. Sometimes it says the word belief. The reason that I separate it is,

913
01:00:05.680 --> 01:00:13.600
is we think that belief is this feeling. If I feel this way, then I know that I'm believing it.

914
01:00:13.600 --> 01:00:18.400
And we're always looking for that feeling. And what I'm saying is, no, you can choose of your

915
01:00:18.400 --> 01:00:27.920
own free, independent, self-willed intentionality that this is true, even though you don't feel it.

916
01:00:28.480 --> 01:00:32.080
Hmm. And even though you don't, even though you don't think it's logical,

917
01:00:33.280 --> 01:00:39.920
you can still choose it simply of your own will that, okay, if God says that that's true,

918
01:00:39.920 --> 01:00:46.800
that's what I'm going to decide is true. And when, after you decide it and you start acting like it,

919
01:00:46.800 --> 01:00:51.360
meaning like you choose that it's, you choose that, that, that what God said really is reality.

920
01:00:52.240 --> 01:00:56.800
It's not a wishful thinking. It's not a, oh, wouldn't that be nice if the world worked like

921
01:00:56.800 --> 01:01:01.520
that? You choose that the world does work like that world, the world, meaning like your life and

922
01:01:01.520 --> 01:01:06.640
your experience, that it does work like that. And once you choose that, it works like that.

923
01:01:07.680 --> 01:01:11.520
Then you should choose yourself into the new man. And the new man always believes his father.

924
01:01:11.520 --> 01:01:17.040
And so the feelings will eventually come. They won't come immediately. Usually sometimes they do,

925
01:01:17.040 --> 01:01:24.480
but they don't always, but, but your feelings aren't depend, uh, that your faith can't be

926
01:01:24.480 --> 01:01:32.240
dependent on your feelings. So I am associating belief with what we've always associated belief

927
01:01:32.240 --> 01:01:37.680
with, which is I feel a particular way. And that's how I know that I believe something

928
01:01:37.680 --> 01:01:45.360
that feeling is not necessary in order to have faith that comes after. And as a result of our

929
01:01:45.360 --> 01:01:53.440
faith, we have to have our faith first because our faith can literally not be dependent on anything

930
01:01:54.080 --> 01:01:59.120
except the fact that God said it can't be dependent on our logic and it can't be dependent

931
01:01:59.120 --> 01:02:04.480
on our feelings. In other words, God says, I don't, I'm a very jealous God. And I don't want,

932
01:02:05.120 --> 01:02:11.680
I want you to choose that. What I said is true simply because I said it instead of waiting for

933
01:02:11.680 --> 01:02:19.600
logic and value logic more than the fact that I said, or valuing your feelings more than what I

934
01:02:19.600 --> 01:02:26.320
said, choose me without the logic and without the feelings. Otherwise we're elevating the feelings

935
01:02:26.320 --> 01:02:35.200
or, or, um, logic over God and we're idolizing them. And God's like, no, choose me without them.

936
01:02:36.800 --> 01:02:41.280
And that's how we choose God over, you know, these idols in our lives.

937
01:02:43.360 --> 01:02:45.520
Anyway, I know I've talked a lot. Does that all make sense?

938
01:02:46.400 --> 01:02:51.440
Yes, it does. And you have, I have, you have said some of it for before and it does make sense.

939
01:02:52.240 --> 01:03:00.560
Yeah. So yeah, I, I remember some of this hearing some of this. Yeah. And I think that what is what

940
01:03:00.560 --> 01:03:09.520
I'm doing, uh, I am choosing, I'm just not seeing or feeling it yet. I'm trying to walk. I'm starting

941
01:03:09.520 --> 01:03:18.880
to walk in and in some areas I've seen, I've been feeling, I feel it or I believe it. And then

942
01:03:20.080 --> 01:03:27.520
with myself, I don't yet feel it and see it, or maybe I'm starting to, but I'm not

943
01:03:28.400 --> 01:03:35.440
fully seeing it yet, but I can still choose it. Yeah. Um, the most I would recommend that,

944
01:03:36.320 --> 01:03:47.680
that you focus most on the fact that God is good and that he loves you. So that I believe will help

945
01:03:48.640 --> 01:03:55.840
you begin to change how begin to change the feelings. In other words, that your feelings

946
01:03:55.840 --> 01:04:01.280
will start coming more in line because we can believe that God protects us and provides for

947
01:04:01.360 --> 01:04:08.560
us and whatever, but if we don't associate them from love that God's doing it out of love,

948
01:04:09.200 --> 01:04:14.800
then we can just feel like, well, yeah, but that's just his relationship to us. You know,

949
01:04:14.800 --> 01:04:22.880
he just feels obligated or it's, it's just that that's his role in our life is just to protect.

950
01:04:22.880 --> 01:04:29.280
We can kind of, and so it, what God wants us to know is that what it is that he does,

951
01:04:29.280 --> 01:04:35.520
he does, he does out of his relationship with us. And the fact that he is love,

952
01:04:36.320 --> 01:04:46.880
remember God can't help loving. So it's not like you, he loves. So as weird as this sounds,

953
01:04:46.880 --> 01:04:52.640
because we all want to be so special that God loves us because we're special, but he doesn't,

954
01:04:52.640 --> 01:04:58.400
he loves us because that's what he does, but he could have chosen to love anybody.

955
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:01.840
And it meaning like not a person.

956
01:05:01.840 --> 01:05:05.160
I mean, like he could have chosen to love other beings or he could have chosen to

957
01:05:05.160 --> 01:05:07.120
just love himself and not love anything else.

958
01:05:07.680 --> 01:05:13.360
But what he chose is he chose an object for that love and wear that object.

959
01:05:13.760 --> 01:05:15.280
So you can't.

960
01:05:15.960 --> 01:05:26.480
So, because it's not in a manner of speaking, excuse me, because it's not about us, then

961
01:05:26.480 --> 01:05:34.200
we can't mess it up because we're not the reason that God is loving.

962
01:05:35.280 --> 01:05:36.800
We're just the object of it.

963
01:05:37.280 --> 01:05:41.000
Now, it doesn't make us not valuable because obviously we're very valuable.

964
01:05:41.000 --> 01:05:48.000
My point in making this in and explaining it like this is for us to understand that

965
01:05:48.760 --> 01:05:57.760
that if that God are that love from the Lord is just God being himself and is dependent

966
01:05:58.040 --> 01:06:05.040
on on us in our actions, we have to be a particular way.

967
01:06:05.040 --> 01:06:07.920
And it's only because we're a particular way that he loves us.

968
01:06:08.360 --> 01:06:10.840
God actually just wanted to love.

969
01:06:10.840 --> 01:06:12.920
So he created the thing that he would love.

970
01:06:13.760 --> 01:06:20.680
He created so and remember that you actually came out of him, so your spirit is born of

971
01:06:20.680 --> 01:06:26.640
his spirit, so that is something that his love naturally gravitates towards.

972
01:06:26.640 --> 01:06:31.800
It's himself, which is in you, you know, and I don't mean you like he only loves

973
01:06:32.080 --> 01:06:35.840
himself and you and doesn't let the rest of you know what I'm saying is it's like

974
01:06:35.840 --> 01:06:39.680
you are a an extension of him.

975
01:06:40.280 --> 01:06:44.360
You're not God, but you're an extension of him and the fact that your DNA is of him

976
01:06:44.360 --> 01:06:48.320
and all of that and you express his character.

977
01:06:48.640 --> 01:06:52.480
In other words, his character is your character and you're expressing that.

978
01:06:52.640 --> 01:06:56.480
And he just and so that love for you is very natural for him.

979
01:06:56.960 --> 01:07:02.480
He's going to do it regardless of regardless of what you, you know, regardless of

980
01:07:02.480 --> 01:07:05.600
whether or not you're obeying him or or not.

981
01:07:06.040 --> 01:07:15.320
And so anyway, so just realize that that that him loving is just him being who he

982
01:07:15.320 --> 01:07:19.680
is, is just him being his natural character, just just natural self.

983
01:07:20.080 --> 01:07:24.200
And it's not dependent on how you're interacting with him at the time.

984
01:07:26.360 --> 01:07:30.760
And then the fact that and then believing that he really is good and he desires good

985
01:07:30.760 --> 01:07:34.600
for you. So expect good in your life.

986
01:07:36.000 --> 01:07:38.400
Now, does it always show up the way that we want?

987
01:07:38.440 --> 01:07:44.680
No, but there is a manner, especially for me, there was a I mean, this is my point is

988
01:07:44.680 --> 01:07:51.960
like this is how it worked for me is there's a manner in which in which when I'm

989
01:07:51.960 --> 01:08:00.560
trying to learn that he's good, he keeps he keeps doing things that in my mind, in my

990
01:08:00.560 --> 01:08:08.160
life translate to him being good, like meaning like I keep thinking, OK, if God's

991
01:08:08.160 --> 01:08:10.200
good, he'll do these types of things.

992
01:08:10.600 --> 01:08:12.080
And often he'll he will.

993
01:08:12.560 --> 01:08:14.400
Now, is God good without those things?

994
01:08:14.400 --> 01:08:20.800
Absolutely. But he's trying to communicate to me in a way that I that that he is good.

995
01:08:20.800 --> 01:08:23.160
And so he's talking to me in my language.

996
01:08:24.160 --> 01:08:29.080
What he wants to do is to elevate my language so that I see him as good outside of

997
01:08:29.080 --> 01:08:30.520
doing these things for me.

998
01:08:30.920 --> 01:08:38.040
But a lot of times he'll do things for me that I that help me.

999
01:08:38.040 --> 01:08:41.279
I mean, like things that I want in life, things that I like in life.

1000
01:08:41.680 --> 01:08:45.000
And so it's easier for me to see, oh, wow, he really is good.

1001
01:08:45.000 --> 01:08:46.200
He really does notice me.

1002
01:08:46.439 --> 01:08:51.399
He's doing all of these things that mean a lot to me that are speaking my language.

1003
01:08:51.399 --> 01:08:52.840
This is how I see good.

1004
01:08:53.080 --> 01:08:54.479
And so he's doing them for me.

1005
01:08:54.479 --> 01:08:56.000
So, oh, my word, he must be good.

1006
01:08:56.479 --> 01:08:59.479
And what God and so he's just kind of like building that faith.

1007
01:08:59.479 --> 01:09:04.600
It's that whole giving me lots of evidence to eventually teach me to have faith.

1008
01:09:04.840 --> 01:09:10.720
You know, he so when we're young in a new area in life, case point that his goodness

1009
01:09:10.720 --> 01:09:17.760
or his love typically do all kinds of things for us that so that we see all of this

1010
01:09:17.760 --> 01:09:21.200
evidence and he gives us evidence.

1011
01:09:22.479 --> 01:09:24.920
And that teaches us how to have faith.

1012
01:09:25.439 --> 01:09:29.479
And then he teaches us how to have faith without the evidence.

1013
01:09:29.800 --> 01:09:35.040
But when we're young in it, a lot of times he'll he'll give us like lots of really

1014
01:09:35.040 --> 01:09:38.399
good things. He'll he'll have like amazing, miraculous things happen.

1015
01:09:38.439 --> 01:09:41.960
He'll let us do all kinds of really cool things that we've always wanted.

1016
01:09:41.960 --> 01:09:44.880
And but we didn't know that God would be that good.

1017
01:09:44.880 --> 01:09:49.640
And and here he makes those things happen for us and whatever, because we're young

1018
01:09:49.640 --> 01:09:50.960
and we're just needing to learn.

1019
01:09:51.000 --> 01:09:53.640
We're just needing to learn to have faith that he really is good.

1020
01:09:53.640 --> 01:09:55.120
So he'll give us lots of proof.

1021
01:09:55.920 --> 01:09:57.600
And then he asks us to have faith.

1022
01:09:58.800 --> 01:10:00.040
But eventually.

1023
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:01.000
He'll grow us.

1024
01:10:01.000 --> 01:10:05.880
And what I try to teach is that, Hey, even though he's showing us this, he doesn't want

1025
01:10:05.880 --> 01:10:09.800
us to rely on the evidence.

1026
01:10:09.800 --> 01:10:18.680
Before believing him, but as a, but he'll, um, but anyway, um, so my point is in talking

1027
01:10:18.680 --> 01:10:24.560
about, and you talking about the fact that, uh, you, uh, are, um, you know, you're, you're

1028
01:10:24.560 --> 01:10:26.640
just not feeling things yet.

1029
01:10:26.640 --> 01:10:30.800
One of the things that I would recommend is focus on his love for you and on the fact

1030
01:10:30.800 --> 01:10:31.880
that he's good.

1031
01:10:31.880 --> 01:10:40.000
In other words, expect good things in your life, expect things to work out and wake up

1032
01:10:40.000 --> 01:10:44.900
every morning, expecting that all kinds of things are going to, are going to be easy

1033
01:10:44.900 --> 01:10:46.040
for you.

1034
01:10:46.040 --> 01:10:52.080
They're going to go your way, um, that God's going to gift you, you know, things without

1035
01:10:52.080 --> 01:10:53.360
you working for him.

1036
01:10:53.360 --> 01:10:56.360
In other words, that in things are going to come into abundance, you're going to get

1037
01:10:56.360 --> 01:11:03.880
phone calls or, uh, you know, from people offering to do things for you or to help you

1038
01:11:03.880 --> 01:11:08.800
feel loved, like, Hey, do you want to go on a walk or I don't know, or whatever, and it's

1039
01:11:08.800 --> 01:11:15.840
wake up every day and throughout every day, just expect good things to happen.

1040
01:11:15.840 --> 01:11:19.160
And then you'll start seeing it everywhere.

1041
01:11:19.160 --> 01:11:27.120
And then you'll begin to feel, and in other words, believe that it really is true, but

1042
01:11:27.120 --> 01:11:34.600
it's an act of faith to choose and to expect to see God's goodness and to see evidence

1043
01:11:34.600 --> 01:11:38.080
of his goodness, evidence of his love.

1044
01:11:38.080 --> 01:11:44.240
So in a way you are exercising faith because you're choosing it without the evidence, but

1045
01:11:44.240 --> 01:11:50.520
in a manner of speaking, there's, um, you're still, you're still, you trying to wait on

1046
01:11:50.520 --> 01:11:52.800
the evidence for it to have more faith.

1047
01:11:52.800 --> 01:11:57.080
So it's like you plan a little seed and then God will work with that.

1048
01:11:57.080 --> 01:12:04.880
And then go back to the exercise that I talked about, uh, love, um, about receiving God's

1049
01:12:04.880 --> 01:12:05.880
love.

1050
01:12:05.880 --> 01:12:11.720
And I recommend doing that every day for like just five minutes, not long, just five minutes.

1051
01:12:11.720 --> 01:12:19.640
And, um, and because, and that will be shockingly powerful to sit with Jesus that he comes next

1052
01:12:19.640 --> 01:12:26.520
to you and allowing him to love you without you trying to love him back.

1053
01:12:26.520 --> 01:12:33.040
Because remember the whole point of the exercise really is to receive something that you don't

1054
01:12:33.040 --> 01:12:43.840
feel you deserve and to realize and to sit with it until his love convinces you that

1055
01:12:43.840 --> 01:12:50.840
it's that he will give you his love, even though, even without you like deserving it

1056
01:12:50.840 --> 01:12:51.840
or earning it.

1057
01:12:51.840 --> 01:12:55.680
I don't mean deserving it isn't like you're a sinner and you don't deserve it.

1058
01:12:55.680 --> 01:13:00.980
But my point is like that it's that his love for you is completely unrelated to whether

1059
01:13:00.980 --> 01:13:03.820
or not you're deserving any kind of deserving.

1060
01:13:03.820 --> 01:13:05.220
It's like, that's not the point.

1061
01:13:05.220 --> 01:13:10.660
Just let him come to you and allow and love him by allowing him to be with you, who he

1062
01:13:10.660 --> 01:13:13.340
wants to be, which is loving you.

1063
01:13:13.340 --> 01:13:19.660
So it's the way to love on him is allow him to come to you and do whatever he wants to

1064
01:13:19.660 --> 01:13:21.180
love on you.

1065
01:13:21.180 --> 01:13:25.820
Just because that's what he wants to do, because that's who is allowing him to be who he is

1066
01:13:25.820 --> 01:13:30.340
because he's just love to allow him to be loved with you, allow him to love on you,

1067
01:13:30.340 --> 01:13:34.580
allow him to love on you without you loving him back.

1068
01:13:34.580 --> 01:13:36.540
I'm not saying you can't love him back.

1069
01:13:36.540 --> 01:13:47.820
I'm saying try to not try to try to kind of like, not, not try to love him back because

1070
01:13:47.820 --> 01:13:54.540
what we typically do is we love him for payment and we need to start and we're loving him

1071
01:13:54.540 --> 01:14:00.740
out of flesh and we need to just allow ourselves to just love very naturally spirit.

1072
01:14:00.740 --> 01:14:07.160
That's what I'm saying is to stop loving him from the way that we've been loving him.

1073
01:14:07.160 --> 01:14:09.660
And we have to figure out how to like cut that off.

1074
01:14:09.660 --> 01:14:11.560
So we're not talking about not loving God.

1075
01:14:11.560 --> 01:14:14.500
We're talking about stop loving him in the way that we've been doing it, which is out

1076
01:14:14.500 --> 01:14:15.500
of the flesh.

1077
01:14:15.500 --> 01:14:17.700
Like, Oh my word, you know, I don't deserve this.

1078
01:14:17.700 --> 01:14:18.700
Oh my goodness.

1079
01:14:18.700 --> 01:14:20.140
Or I'm so overwhelmed with love.

1080
01:14:20.140 --> 01:14:21.900
I need to love him back and whatever.

1081
01:14:21.900 --> 01:14:24.140
Well then that's, we're trying to earn it again.

1082
01:14:24.740 --> 01:14:25.740
We're trying to keep the thing going.

1083
01:14:25.740 --> 01:14:29.540
We're trying to, you know, and we're trying to relieve ourselves of the fact that we don't

1084
01:14:29.540 --> 01:14:31.900
feel deserving that he's loving on us.

1085
01:14:31.900 --> 01:14:35.660
So like, okay, how can I kind of like relieve myself with this guilt or this pressure?

1086
01:14:35.660 --> 01:14:39.580
Oh, I'll love him back or using it as payment.

1087
01:14:39.580 --> 01:14:45.780
So anyway, that's what I'm saying is though those things will really, I I'm telling you,

1088
01:14:45.780 --> 01:14:50.500
they will start changing your, your feelings.

1089
01:14:50.500 --> 01:14:55.180
So believing that he's good and expecting those things throughout every day.

1090
01:14:55.180 --> 01:14:58.220
And then that good things will happen.

1091
01:14:58.220 --> 01:15:00.060
Good things that you want to happen.

1092
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:06.240
happen. Now you don't get to pick what those good things are, but just expect that you're going to

1093
01:15:06.240 --> 01:15:13.280
see good things and then just wait and then just expectantly go through the day to discover what

1094
01:15:13.280 --> 01:15:18.800
they are as opposed to God. I want you to do this. God, I want you to do that. Just like

1095
01:15:19.520 --> 01:15:24.240
expect good things to happen. When you go into a meeting, expect that it's going to be good.

1096
01:15:24.240 --> 01:15:28.560
When you go into the classroom every day, expect that it's going to be good. Don't hope that it's

1097
01:15:28.560 --> 01:15:34.480
good. That won't work. Expect it. I know it feels weird because you will feel unprotected. You'll

1098
01:15:34.480 --> 01:15:39.120
feel like you're not going to be prepared, that you're going to be naive and that you're not going

1099
01:15:39.120 --> 01:15:44.960
to be prepared for anything potentially bad that could happen. But remember that's our self-protection

1100
01:15:44.960 --> 01:15:51.200
mode of always trying to be aware, you know, so instead of choosing self-protection every day,

1101
01:15:51.760 --> 01:15:59.440
choose to see the manifestation of God's character of goodness and by you relying on that,

1102
01:15:59.440 --> 01:16:05.840
it leaves yourself open and vulnerable for God to step in and protect you. Amen.

1103
01:16:09.920 --> 01:16:13.520
So I know we talked about a lot. Does that make sense? You could go back and re-watch

1104
01:16:13.520 --> 01:16:18.480
this recording if it's a lot. Yeah, it's good. I think

1105
01:16:21.760 --> 01:16:28.000
I can tell when you're talking that not everything is going in and I think it is

1106
01:16:28.000 --> 01:16:33.760
one of the things that I wanted to ask you about. I have asked before, so it is that

1107
01:16:36.640 --> 01:16:49.680
it is that and I just feel so overwhelmed. I don't know how to handle being overwhelmed in this

1108
01:16:49.680 --> 01:16:52.880
and even like when I hear things and I know that they're right,

1109
01:16:53.840 --> 01:17:00.240
sometimes it doesn't, I can't take it in because I'm so overwhelmed or I can't start.

1110
01:17:02.960 --> 01:17:08.640
Okay, now you tell me, but I think that this might be what's going on. Do you feel overwhelmed

1111
01:17:08.640 --> 01:17:13.120
because you feel like, oh my word, there's more stuff I need to get, more stuff in which I need

1112
01:17:13.120 --> 01:17:18.720
to change, more things I need to remember? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Okay. And also that's why

1113
01:17:20.160 --> 01:17:27.040
I can't really take in all of your teaching or I just feel like lifestyle, there's so many things

1114
01:17:28.000 --> 01:17:34.640
that I have to do and I don't know how to get time to do it and I'm so busy and I can tell

1115
01:17:34.640 --> 01:17:41.120
that other things in my life with work and other things is that I've been stressing out. And then

1116
01:17:41.120 --> 01:17:47.520
I don't know, like my old way would be, okay, I need to set boundaries. I have too many things.

1117
01:17:47.520 --> 01:17:53.760
December, November has been too busy. I need to make sure that December is less busy and you kind

1118
01:17:53.760 --> 01:18:00.800
of manage things out from your soul. Yeah. So, and then you stop being so overwhelmed because you

1119
01:18:00.800 --> 01:18:06.560
kind of manage it, but it's, but now I'm thinking I don't want to do that anymore and I don't think

1120
01:18:06.560 --> 01:18:11.440
that's what the spirit's saying. Maybe I can be just as busy, but not be in a state of

1121
01:18:11.440 --> 01:18:21.120
overwhelmness. I just don't know because November has been really busy. I don't know how, and I've

1122
01:18:21.120 --> 01:18:27.440
been feeling so overwhelmed some days that I have to have time out. Like I can't respond to texts.

1123
01:18:27.440 --> 01:18:32.400
I don't, when people ask me to do something for them, I can't even comprehend what they're saying.

1124
01:18:32.400 --> 01:18:38.320
Like they're teaching, I can't seem to follow up things and I just don't know how to, and I know

1125
01:18:38.320 --> 01:18:44.480
that I've been having a lot of stress in my life and that's one of the reasons why I'm here. I just

1126
01:18:44.480 --> 01:18:50.960
don't know how to get out of it and live in the spirit without micromanaging it or setting

1127
01:18:50.960 --> 01:18:56.960
boundaries or doing all the things that has helped me survive these years because it has been helpful

1128
01:18:57.760 --> 01:19:03.360
to put boundaries because before that it was worse. But now, so maybe moving from

1129
01:19:04.640 --> 01:19:11.120
the body to the soul, but now I want to live in the spirit. Yeah. And, but I don't, but I'm still

1130
01:19:11.120 --> 01:19:18.800
so overwhelmed so, so often. So, okay. So sometimes like you're saying, the things that you're saying

1131
01:19:18.800 --> 01:19:23.920
will overwhelm me more because it's just more things I have to do, you know, and I know that's

1132
01:19:23.920 --> 01:19:35.280
not what it's supposed to be. Yes. So yes. So the simple thing, everything hinges or comes back to,

1133
01:19:35.280 --> 01:19:43.600
or whatever, uh, this one thing, it's just one sentence, you know, choose that God is who he

1134
01:19:43.600 --> 01:19:49.840
says that he is to the degree he says he is that, and that you are who he says that you are period.

1135
01:19:50.160 --> 01:19:55.840
That's the end of the story. That's all you need to know. So just kind of like apply that to every,

1136
01:19:56.480 --> 01:19:59.760
to whenever you feel that you need to be, uh, to

1137
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:06.240
shift into rest or, or that you, that you, um, you, you feel overwhelmed, but oh my word,

1138
01:20:06.240 --> 01:20:10.240
there's more, there's more information or there's more things that I need to do or whatever.

1139
01:20:10.960 --> 01:20:17.040
If you go back to that, that will, in a manner of speaking, it will then tell you what you need to

1140
01:20:17.040 --> 01:20:23.120
do, how you need to handle the situation or how you need to shift into rest so that you don't

1141
01:20:23.120 --> 01:20:28.880
feel overwhelmed or whatever in this situation. So that is it. And that is the whole point really.

1142
01:20:30.000 --> 01:20:36.160
Uh, the rest intensive and the rest lifestyle is that sentence is everything. If people just

1143
01:20:36.160 --> 01:20:42.320
get that and live like that, they don't need the rest of it. So they could like, literally,

1144
01:20:42.320 --> 01:20:46.560
if I just tell them that sentence, I'm like, that's the secret go live like that. What does

1145
01:20:46.560 --> 01:20:52.000
God say? And then believe it. And what does he say about himself? And then choose that that's

1146
01:20:52.000 --> 01:20:56.480
your reality. And what does he say about you and choose that's your reality. And then meaning like,

1147
01:20:56.480 --> 01:21:01.280
if you choose that it's your reality, then start acting like, okay, if I, if this is true,

1148
01:21:01.280 --> 01:21:05.840
then how do I act? If this is true, then what decision story I make, et cetera.

1149
01:21:05.840 --> 01:21:12.320
So it's all very, very simple. The reason I keep talking about all of this other stuff. And the

1150
01:21:12.320 --> 01:21:17.280
reason that it takes, like, I have like 17 hours of teaching, you know, if you go all the way from

1151
01:21:17.280 --> 01:21:21.680
and, and I have more than that, but like, if I'm just looking at the inner is rest, you know,

1152
01:21:21.680 --> 01:21:28.720
series, you know, it's only to answer people's questions because God is simple,

1153
01:21:29.920 --> 01:21:35.200
but people are used to things being complicated. So they keep throwing all of these like

1154
01:21:35.840 --> 01:21:41.920
special scenarios out, not understanding that, that I always give the same answer every time.

1155
01:21:41.920 --> 01:21:46.960
It's always from what is God said, and then just how do you apply what God said to that unique

1156
01:21:46.960 --> 01:21:54.880
situation? You know, it's not that you uniquely apply. It's not like God has a different answer

1157
01:21:54.880 --> 01:22:01.920
for each situation. It's just, it's that other people have a hard time connecting,

1158
01:22:03.520 --> 01:22:10.240
connecting how simple that one sentence is to how to handle all these situations. Cause we're

1159
01:22:10.240 --> 01:22:16.320
used to there being a different answer for a different situation. So what I do is I help

1160
01:22:16.320 --> 01:22:22.960
people bridge that gap by showing them how you take this one sentence and apply it to everything.

1161
01:22:23.520 --> 01:22:29.680
So basically I just help people translate and help translate that for people, help interpret

1162
01:22:29.680 --> 01:22:35.600
it for people so that in equip them to be able to do it themselves, to be able to take that one

1163
01:22:35.600 --> 01:22:42.160
sentence and understand how it's applying so that they can begin to see, oh, it really is very simple

1164
01:22:42.800 --> 01:22:47.120
because so basically I'm just teaching people a different way to kind of view it.

1165
01:22:47.120 --> 01:22:55.840
So I'm not teaching all of these different things. I'm just teaching how to, by using different words

1166
01:22:55.840 --> 01:23:01.280
and different language, how to apply this one simple thing in all of these different areas.

1167
01:23:02.160 --> 01:23:09.040
And, and I'm only doing that because we approach it from a complicated perspective. So my point is

1168
01:23:09.040 --> 01:23:14.240
it's not complicated. So don't view it as complicated. Just like, okay, she's just talking

1169
01:23:14.240 --> 01:23:20.560
about something new. So let me just sit there and just, just hear her talk. It's kind of like the

1170
01:23:20.560 --> 01:23:25.280
Bible. It's like, if you're having a hard time reading the Bible right now, you know, and you

1171
01:23:25.280 --> 01:23:30.240
may not be, but a lot of people are, um, you know, some, so many people who come to me in a rest

1172
01:23:30.240 --> 01:23:34.160
intensive, you know, are always like, you know, well, I don't enjoy reading the Bible anymore.

1173
01:23:34.160 --> 01:23:39.040
And I'm like, well, yeah, because you expect that it's all work. I've got to get something out of

1174
01:23:39.040 --> 01:23:44.000
it. I have to, I have to receive a new revelation. Then I have to apply it. I've got to figure out

1175
01:23:44.000 --> 01:23:47.680
how the Bible is telling me I've been doing something wrong all this time and what I need

1176
01:23:47.680 --> 01:23:52.960
to be doing different. And then we typically apply everything new that we're learning.

1177
01:23:52.960 --> 01:23:57.440
We apply that same thought to it. Like when you're listening to my teachings, okay, I've got to learn

1178
01:23:57.440 --> 01:24:01.520
something and then I got to figure it out. And then I got to figure out how it applies to my life.

1179
01:24:01.520 --> 01:24:08.800
And I'm, you know, and how to apply it and just let your, if you're interested in watching it and

1180
01:24:08.800 --> 01:24:12.800
you don't have to, you don't have to watch all of these teachings right now. You've got lifetime

1181
01:24:12.800 --> 01:24:19.600
access. If it's overwhelming to you, just let it go. The whole point is to go through the rest

1182
01:24:19.600 --> 01:24:26.720
intensive and the rest lifestyle, just choosing for yourself at a deeper degree to connect with

1183
01:24:26.720 --> 01:24:33.200
God, to the point that you believe them, meaning like you have faith in him. You just are going to

1184
01:24:33.200 --> 01:24:37.680
believe him. And then what does he say? And you don't have to believe all of the things that he

1185
01:24:37.680 --> 01:24:43.200
says about what he is just okay. Some simple things he's good. And so therefore I can expect

1186
01:24:43.200 --> 01:24:49.840
good things from him and he's love. So he loves me no matter what, et cetera, those things as simple

1187
01:24:49.840 --> 01:24:54.960
as they sound, they will change everything because it's the fact that we're not believing that. And

1188
01:24:54.960 --> 01:24:59.920
we're actually believing the opposite that's created the life that we have. So if we just go.

1189
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:06.320
back to these simple things, then it really

1190
01:25:06.320 --> 01:25:08.440
will change everything.

1191
01:25:08.440 --> 01:25:12.720
So my point is, just choose that.

1192
01:25:12.720 --> 01:25:15.680
Don't choose to learn all of these things

1193
01:25:15.680 --> 01:25:18.320
and all of these intricacies of how to apply this,

1194
01:25:18.320 --> 01:25:19.780
and what do I do about boundaries,

1195
01:25:19.780 --> 01:25:21.640
and what do I do about this.

1196
01:25:21.640 --> 01:25:24.520
If it's helpful, just receive what

1197
01:25:24.520 --> 01:25:27.240
it is that you hear and apply the little bit

1198
01:25:27.240 --> 01:25:29.880
that you were able to receive.

1199
01:25:29.880 --> 01:25:31.920
And then the rest of it that you didn't get,

1200
01:25:31.920 --> 01:25:33.680
and you just felt overwhelmed by,

1201
01:25:33.680 --> 01:25:35.720
and it just went right over your head

1202
01:25:35.720 --> 01:25:37.400
because you're like, I'm so full.

1203
01:25:37.400 --> 01:25:38.680
I can't hear anymore.

1204
01:25:38.680 --> 01:25:39.840
That's fine.

1205
01:25:39.840 --> 01:25:41.560
Your soul got it.

1206
01:25:41.560 --> 01:25:45.160
Your spirit got it without you having to be conscious of it.

1207
01:25:45.160 --> 01:25:48.720
So just take this parts that you got,

1208
01:25:48.720 --> 01:25:51.800
and just allow the Lord to change you

1209
01:25:51.800 --> 01:25:54.400
without you working for it.

1210
01:25:54.400 --> 01:25:55.680
So don't be conscious about it.

1211
01:25:55.680 --> 01:25:56.600
Don't be overwhelmed.

1212
01:25:56.600 --> 01:25:58.320
Don't try to learn something new.

1213
01:25:58.320 --> 01:26:01.520
Just try to choose to believe God.

1214
01:26:01.520 --> 01:26:03.200
What does God say about you?

1215
01:26:03.200 --> 01:26:04.280
He says He's good.

1216
01:26:04.280 --> 01:26:06.040
He says He's love.

1217
01:26:06.040 --> 01:26:07.720
Just very simple things.

1218
01:26:07.720 --> 01:26:11.760
And choose that that's what you get out of the rest lifestyle,

1219
01:26:11.760 --> 01:26:15.000
not learning all of the intricacies of how to apply it

1220
01:26:15.000 --> 01:26:16.640
in different scenarios.

1221
01:26:16.640 --> 01:26:21.840
Change your relationship and interaction with God

1222
01:26:21.840 --> 01:26:25.240
that you're going to believe Him, that He's good,

1223
01:26:25.240 --> 01:26:26.560
that He's love.

1224
01:26:26.560 --> 01:26:29.360
And then let Him show you the rest over time.

1225
01:26:29.360 --> 01:26:30.600
You're not going to know everything

1226
01:26:30.600 --> 01:26:33.360
that God says about Himself and apply it all right now

1227
01:26:33.360 --> 01:26:35.600
or apply it in the next six weeks.

1228
01:26:35.600 --> 01:26:39.280
That's over eternity.

1229
01:26:39.280 --> 01:26:39.760
Why?

1230
01:26:39.760 --> 01:26:42.480
Because He's infinite, and He's constantly expanding.

1231
01:26:42.480 --> 01:26:44.440
So we're never going to learn all of Him anyway.

1232
01:26:44.440 --> 01:26:48.160
So you're just on this constant journey of discovery of like,

1233
01:26:48.160 --> 01:26:51.160
OK, what else does He say about Himself?

1234
01:26:51.160 --> 01:26:52.560
And you expand into that.

1235
01:26:52.560 --> 01:26:54.400
And then once you become familiar with that,

1236
01:26:54.400 --> 01:26:57.600
then God teaches you something else to expand into that.

1237
01:26:57.600 --> 01:26:59.680
Allow things to happen.

1238
01:26:59.680 --> 01:27:04.360
Don't push yourself to change.

1239
01:27:04.360 --> 01:27:06.160
I think that's what I've been doing.

1240
01:27:06.160 --> 01:27:10.320
I've been starting to push a little bit and also feeling

1241
01:27:10.320 --> 01:27:13.080
like, oh, no, I've been in this for six weeks,

1242
01:27:13.080 --> 01:27:15.200
and then I heard you're teaching in the summer,

1243
01:27:15.200 --> 01:27:18.160
and now I should have moved on or I

1244
01:27:18.160 --> 01:27:20.120
should be in a different place.

1245
01:27:20.120 --> 01:27:23.560
But what I mostly got out of what you've been saying now

1246
01:27:23.560 --> 01:27:27.960
is just something that you said you want to own yourself first

1247
01:27:27.960 --> 01:27:32.800
and also realizing, thinking, oh, I'm at step one.

1248
01:27:32.800 --> 01:27:34.680
And in a way, you'll be at step one,

1249
01:27:34.680 --> 01:27:36.240
being loved by God all the time.

1250
01:27:36.240 --> 01:27:40.640
But actually, I thought that I should be grasping it now

1251
01:27:40.640 --> 01:27:42.640
and I should be in a different place.

1252
01:27:42.640 --> 01:27:46.360
And now I should start moving into co-creating more with God

1253
01:27:46.360 --> 01:27:48.480
or doing a lot of more things or changing

1254
01:27:48.480 --> 01:27:51.360
or changing other people's lives and my students and my pupils

1255
01:27:52.120 --> 01:27:55.360
and also I should start doing more.

1256
01:27:55.360 --> 01:27:58.640
And then I feel overwhelmed with all the things

1257
01:27:58.640 --> 01:28:00.560
where I should be at.

1258
01:28:00.560 --> 01:28:05.400
While I haven't actually owned myself, really.

1259
01:28:05.400 --> 01:28:08.880
I haven't taken on the mask, my own mask, fully.

1260
01:28:08.880 --> 01:28:11.920
And I don't actually, I'm just starting

1261
01:28:11.920 --> 01:28:14.760
to believe that what he says about me is true.

1262
01:28:14.760 --> 01:28:17.720
And I'm just starting to believe that he is who he says he is

1263
01:28:17.720 --> 01:28:20.800
and that I can choose it even if I don't believe it.

1264
01:28:21.320 --> 01:28:25.800
So I'm kind of not as far along as I would want to, I think.

1265
01:28:25.800 --> 01:28:28.120
Well, I don't think anybody is.

1266
01:28:28.120 --> 01:28:29.160
Not even me.

1267
01:28:29.160 --> 01:28:31.560
No one's as far along as we want to be.

1268
01:28:31.560 --> 01:28:34.040
But yeah, that's actually something

1269
01:28:34.040 --> 01:28:36.480
that I had actually thought about you with is I thought,

1270
01:28:36.480 --> 01:28:41.560
well, I don't know if Renata is ready for the rest lifestyle

1271
01:28:41.560 --> 01:28:44.840
simply because I don't know if it would be,

1272
01:28:44.840 --> 01:28:47.000
I don't want to say overwhelming for you,

1273
01:28:47.000 --> 01:28:49.640
but just like what you said.

1274
01:28:50.040 --> 01:28:53.280
If you're still focusing on these other parts,

1275
01:28:53.280 --> 01:28:58.040
are you going to feel like you don't have a place

1276
01:28:58.040 --> 01:29:00.120
that you feel that you can step into,

1277
01:29:00.120 --> 01:29:03.840
like you're not ready to step into like what we talk about

1278
01:29:03.840 --> 01:29:04.960
like in the rest of lifestyle?

1279
01:29:04.960 --> 01:29:06.920
I thought about that for everyone.

1280
01:29:06.920 --> 01:29:10.120
Maybe everybody's just not kind of ready, but here's the,

1281
01:29:10.120 --> 01:29:12.960
but so I was like, well, you know,

1282
01:29:12.960 --> 01:29:15.280
but everybody kept wanting to continue.

1283
01:29:15.280 --> 01:29:17.760
And I was like, well, what can I give him next?

1284
01:29:17.760 --> 01:29:19.280
And so I just thought about this.

1285
01:29:19.920 --> 01:29:22.760
So what I would recommend is that you and others take this

1286
01:29:23.960 --> 01:29:28.960
just simply as take the pieces of it that makes sense

1287
01:29:29.200 --> 01:29:33.760
and that you feel equipped and ready and stretched enough.

1288
01:29:33.760 --> 01:29:35.960
In other words, there's enough room

1289
01:29:35.960 --> 01:29:38.320
that you feel like you can apply it, great.

1290
01:29:38.320 --> 01:29:43.000
The rest of it, just hear it and just get hope.

1291
01:29:43.000 --> 01:29:44.040
Like, oh my word.

1292
01:29:44.040 --> 01:29:46.280
So that's what life looks like in rest.

1293
01:29:46.280 --> 01:29:49.440
So that's what, how things can look different

1294
01:29:49.440 --> 01:29:52.080
or be different, or in other words,

1295
01:29:52.080 --> 01:29:55.160
just allow it to shift your paradigm

1296
01:29:55.160 --> 01:29:58.600
of what to expect life to be like in the kingdom.

1297
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:03.480
trying to figure out, okay, but how do I do it now?

1298
01:30:03.480 --> 01:30:06.600
Forget that, just let it be kind of interesting.

1299
01:30:06.600 --> 01:30:08.780
Like, oh my word, well, that's an interesting way.

1300
01:30:08.780 --> 01:30:11.120
I didn't ever think of like applying,

1301
01:30:11.120 --> 01:30:14.420
of approaching life from that perspective or whatever,

1302
01:30:14.420 --> 01:30:17.440
but don't feel the pressure to apply it.

1303
01:30:18.840 --> 01:30:21.380
It's not there now, you're not there now.

1304
01:30:22.580 --> 01:30:26.080
And I'm glad that we're having this conversation.

1305
01:30:26.680 --> 01:30:30.400
I need to mention that to the other people

1306
01:30:30.400 --> 01:30:32.240
in the group as well,

1307
01:30:32.240 --> 01:30:34.800
maybe like on a fireside chat or something like that.

1308
01:30:34.800 --> 01:30:39.800
And to make sure that people just take this as simply,

1309
01:30:41.440 --> 01:30:44.680
it's like being exposed to,

1310
01:30:44.680 --> 01:30:46.800
just allowing this to be something

1311
01:30:46.800 --> 01:30:49.240
not that they have to apply and step into

1312
01:30:49.240 --> 01:30:51.960
other than like anything that they just kind of feel

1313
01:30:51.960 --> 01:30:53.280
excited about applying.

1314
01:30:53.280 --> 01:30:55.920
No, hey, if there's something specific, go for it.

1315
01:30:56.440 --> 01:30:59.000
That excites you and motivates you, go for it.

1316
01:30:59.000 --> 01:31:02.560
But otherwise just receive it more, not in this,

1317
01:31:02.560 --> 01:31:04.260
okay, how do I apply this?

1318
01:31:04.260 --> 01:31:08.720
But more like just allowing yourself to just be exposed

1319
01:31:08.720 --> 01:31:12.120
to a different perspective

1320
01:31:12.120 --> 01:31:15.440
or a different approach to life in the kingdom

1321
01:31:15.440 --> 01:31:17.140
that you never thought of before.

1322
01:31:17.140 --> 01:31:19.020
You didn't know that you could view life

1323
01:31:19.020 --> 01:31:21.800
and approach life from this other way.

1324
01:31:21.800 --> 01:31:23.920
And then just take all the pressure off

1325
01:31:23.920 --> 01:31:27.480
and then focus still on the other stuff

1326
01:31:27.480 --> 01:31:31.460
because the governing creation can't work

1327
01:31:31.460 --> 01:31:34.920
without the other, without the choosing to believe

1328
01:31:34.920 --> 01:31:37.040
because everything always comes back to

1329
01:31:37.040 --> 01:31:38.320
who does God say that he is,

1330
01:31:38.320 --> 01:31:39.960
to the degree he says he is that

1331
01:31:39.960 --> 01:31:41.480
and who does he say that I am?

1332
01:31:41.480 --> 01:31:44.320
Everything always comes back to that.

1333
01:31:44.320 --> 01:31:46.880
That's why I start with love first.

1334
01:31:46.880 --> 01:31:50.120
I know everyone probably was shocked that,

1335
01:31:50.120 --> 01:31:52.680
hey, I've joined something about rest

1336
01:31:52.680 --> 01:31:54.120
because I wanna learn how to rest

1337
01:31:54.120 --> 01:31:56.840
and why are the first two sessions about love

1338
01:31:56.840 --> 01:31:58.380
and about the fact that I'm one spirit.

1339
01:31:58.380 --> 01:32:00.000
And I'm like, because everything

1340
01:32:00.000 --> 01:32:01.600
will always come back to that.

1341
01:32:01.600 --> 01:32:04.360
If you're struggling, you always have to come back to love.

1342
01:32:04.360 --> 01:32:06.880
Like if the fact that we're what, eight weeks in

1343
01:32:06.880 --> 01:32:08.560
or seven weeks in, however long,

1344
01:32:08.560 --> 01:32:10.840
it's probably about seven now, seven and a half,

1345
01:32:10.840 --> 01:32:14.120
half weeks in, I'm still going back to love.

1346
01:32:14.120 --> 01:32:17.500
I'm telling you, go back to session one about that exercise.

1347
01:32:17.500 --> 01:32:19.520
Those are the foundations.

1348
01:32:20.520 --> 01:32:25.520
And so that, because that's what I have to go back to.

1349
01:32:25.560 --> 01:32:28.080
It's the thing that makes everything else work.

1350
01:32:29.240 --> 01:32:30.880
The fact that God is love

1351
01:32:30.880 --> 01:32:33.160
and the fact that we're one spirit with him,

1352
01:32:33.160 --> 01:32:36.040
that is, that's needed for rest.

1353
01:32:36.040 --> 01:32:38.140
Cause remember the fact that we're one spirit with him,

1354
01:32:38.140 --> 01:32:40.200
that's the place of rest,

1355
01:32:40.200 --> 01:32:42.120
but we're not gonna feel safe,

1356
01:32:43.080 --> 01:32:45.520
having that type of unity with the Lord

1357
01:32:45.520 --> 01:32:47.920
when we don't feel loved by him.

1358
01:32:47.920 --> 01:32:50.000
So that's why I talk about love first.

1359
01:32:50.000 --> 01:32:51.960
I like set everything up for love,

1360
01:32:51.960 --> 01:32:54.240
the fact, hey, he loves you, so trust him,

1361
01:32:54.240 --> 01:32:56.800
feel safe with him, choose that he loves you.

1362
01:32:56.800 --> 01:32:58.600
And now that you're getting a little bit more

1363
01:32:58.600 --> 01:33:03.400
of that foundation, okay, now shift into the play

1364
01:33:03.400 --> 01:33:05.360
and now know that the place of rest

1365
01:33:05.360 --> 01:33:07.520
is you being unified with him.

1366
01:33:07.520 --> 01:33:11.280
And you can feel safe operating out of union with him

1367
01:33:11.280 --> 01:33:12.860
now that you know he loves you

1368
01:33:12.860 --> 01:33:14.880
and he's not anything to be afraid of.

1369
01:33:14.880 --> 01:33:17.440
So that's why I focus on those two things first,

1370
01:33:17.960 --> 01:33:20.160
because it's what we always go back to.

1371
01:33:20.160 --> 01:33:23.920
But so there are two videos that I recommend

1372
01:33:23.920 --> 01:33:26.720
that you watch that I think will be helpful for you.

1373
01:33:26.720 --> 01:33:30.600
They're in the rest intensive members page.

1374
01:33:30.600 --> 01:33:33.760
It's called like you are enough

1375
01:33:33.760 --> 01:33:36.280
or how to believe you're enough or something like that,

1376
01:33:36.280 --> 01:33:37.900
or how to be enough for yourself.

1377
01:33:37.900 --> 01:33:39.560
I think that's what it's called.

1378
01:33:39.560 --> 01:33:43.680
I think it's the last one of the supportive teachings.

1379
01:33:43.680 --> 01:33:46.360
So look at that one, how to be,

1380
01:33:46.960 --> 01:33:49.240
watch that one first.

1381
01:33:49.240 --> 01:33:52.560
And then the second one that you watch

1382
01:33:52.560 --> 01:33:56.120
would be how to empower yourself to choose,

1383
01:33:56.120 --> 01:33:57.560
I think is what it's called.

1384
01:33:58.600 --> 01:34:01.960
So watch those two.

1385
01:34:01.960 --> 01:34:06.480
I think that those will help because people last

1386
01:34:06.480 --> 01:34:09.800
in the other community and not in the other community,

1387
01:34:09.800 --> 01:34:14.360
meaning like the rest intensive Facebook community,

1388
01:34:14.360 --> 01:34:16.200
they were running into the same problem,

1389
01:34:17.040 --> 01:34:19.080
and they were just like, we're just really struggling.

1390
01:34:19.080 --> 01:34:23.640
And I finally realized, okay, they need to,

1391
01:34:23.640 --> 01:34:26.680
they need to, I thought, okay, well, how can I approach it?

1392
01:34:26.680 --> 01:34:28.400
Because every group is a bit different.

1393
01:34:28.400 --> 01:34:29.560
Every person's a bit different.

1394
01:34:29.560 --> 01:34:31.080
I thought, okay, so what is it that they need?

1395
01:34:31.080 --> 01:34:34.720
And I thought they need to know that they are,

1396
01:34:34.720 --> 01:34:36.280
that they are who God says that they are.

1397
01:34:36.280 --> 01:34:37.960
In other words, that they're good,

1398
01:34:37.960 --> 01:34:41.480
that they're loved, that they're who God is.

1399
01:34:43.120 --> 01:34:45.440
Yeah, I don't think I'm not there.

1400
01:34:45.480 --> 01:34:48.360
Yeah, and so other people weren't too.

1401
01:34:48.360 --> 01:34:51.280
And they were having a difficult time choosing God

1402
01:34:51.280 --> 01:34:53.440
because they couldn't choose themselves.

1403
01:34:53.440 --> 01:34:56.080
So I thought, okay, they're having a hard time doing that

1404
01:34:56.080 --> 01:34:57.640
because some people find that easier

1405
01:34:57.640 --> 01:35:00.080
and then find it easier to believe that God is.

1406
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:07.000
That they are who God says that they are, but some people can't do that because they themselves are too big of a hurdle.

1407
01:35:07.000 --> 01:35:12.000
So I'm like, okay, so let's go about this a bit different. I'm like, choose yourself first.

1408
01:35:12.000 --> 01:35:17.000
And I didn't word it like this, but it's almost like, okay, just forget God for a second.

1409
01:35:17.000 --> 01:35:19.000
I don't mean like forget God.

1410
01:35:20.000 --> 01:35:25.000
It's like, okay, just don't, don't worry about like trying to believe him about like who he is and all of that.

1411
01:35:25.000 --> 01:35:31.000
Believe that you really are who he says that you are, that you are and treat yourself like that.

1412
01:35:31.000 --> 01:35:48.000
And so I give people recommendations of how to treat themselves in a new way, how to interact with themselves in a new way, how to value themselves, how to respect themselves, how to give themselves dignity, how to value their desires, how to start acting on those desires.

1413
01:35:48.000 --> 01:35:52.000
Because that's what I learned as well. That's how I first started.

1414
01:35:52.000 --> 01:36:02.000
I did that for about 10 months before I made that what I refer to as the ultimate choice, which I think is that little write-up that I did.

1415
01:36:02.000 --> 01:36:05.000
Did you read something that I wrote called the ultimate choice?

1416
01:36:05.000 --> 01:36:09.000
Maybe not, but it's where, yeah, I must've posted that later.

1417
01:36:09.000 --> 01:36:11.000
It's in the supportive teachings.

1418
01:36:11.000 --> 01:36:14.000
So the first ones at the top, there's like six of them.

1419
01:36:14.000 --> 01:36:15.000
Those are writings.

1420
01:36:15.000 --> 01:36:17.000
The ones underneath them are videos.

1421
01:36:17.000 --> 01:36:20.000
But anyway, the thing is that one of those is the ultimate choice.

1422
01:36:20.000 --> 01:36:22.000
So you don't, you'll eventually get to it.

1423
01:36:22.000 --> 01:36:27.000
Point is just focus on, on yourself right now.

1424
01:36:27.000 --> 01:36:29.000
Meaning like that.

1425
01:36:29.000 --> 01:36:37.000
Believe that if God says that you are that thing that you really are, and then act and then treat yourself like that.

1426
01:36:37.000 --> 01:36:39.000
So I'll explain it.

1427
01:36:40.000 --> 01:36:43.000
Why does it take so long?

1428
01:36:43.000 --> 01:36:47.000
Or like you're saying that you're like, why are we not ready?

1429
01:36:47.000 --> 01:36:53.000
Is there anything we are doing that are hindering it or kind of delaying it?

1430
01:36:53.000 --> 01:36:55.000
Or like, why are we not further?

1431
01:36:55.000 --> 01:36:58.000
Or is there anything?

1432
01:36:59.000 --> 01:37:00.000
That's just how long it takes.

1433
01:37:00.000 --> 01:37:03.000
And everyone's individually at different places.

1434
01:37:03.000 --> 01:37:10.000
And you're going through other things added to what's going on in the rest intensive or the rest lifestyle.

1435
01:37:10.000 --> 01:37:11.000
Yeah.

1436
01:37:11.000 --> 01:37:16.000
So I don't mean in any way to like, like hurt anybody's feelings or offend anybody.

1437
01:37:16.000 --> 01:37:17.000
No, no, no, no.

1438
01:37:17.000 --> 01:37:19.000
I'm just, I think I'm just frustrated on myself.

1439
01:37:19.000 --> 01:37:22.000
I'm like, why am I not, why am I not getting this?

1440
01:37:22.000 --> 01:37:23.000
Why am I not further?

1441
01:37:23.000 --> 01:37:25.000
And then I want to be.

1442
01:37:25.000 --> 01:37:27.000
But I'm not.

1443
01:37:27.000 --> 01:37:28.000
Yeah.

1444
01:37:28.000 --> 01:37:39.000
Well, what I was trying to say when, and what I meant when I was saying, you know, that I had thought that maybe people, some people weren't ready is not.

1445
01:37:39.000 --> 01:37:41.000
It is not as if that's a bad thing.

1446
01:37:41.000 --> 01:37:48.000
I was trying to relieve you of as if you were feeling frustrated of like, why can't I get this and why isn't it working?

1447
01:37:48.000 --> 01:37:52.000
I'm like, well, because you don't have to be there.

1448
01:37:52.000 --> 01:37:53.000
That's fine.

1449
01:37:54.000 --> 01:37:58.000
You know, I didn't want you to feel like, oh my word, you're not getting something that you're quote unquote.

1450
01:37:58.000 --> 01:38:03.000
I was like, I didn't know that everybody was ready for this anyway to like start stepping into it.

1451
01:38:03.000 --> 01:38:08.000
But because everyone wanted to continue to have the support and learn how to like walk in it.

1452
01:38:08.000 --> 01:38:13.000
In other words, while they had momentum, they wanted to keep going while they had momentum.

1453
01:38:13.000 --> 01:38:14.000
So what do I do?

1454
01:38:14.000 --> 01:38:17.000
And I thought, well, I'll expose them to this.

1455
01:38:17.000 --> 01:38:22.000
But I thought that very few people were ready to step into actually applying it.

1456
01:38:22.000 --> 01:38:28.000
But I thought it'll, it'll expose them to the information and then we'll continue to all be in the community together.

1457
01:38:28.000 --> 01:38:34.000
And then so they'll still feel supported in learning more and more about how to live this lifestyle of rest.

1458
01:38:34.000 --> 01:38:39.000
So, but understand, I, I did this.

1459
01:38:39.000 --> 01:38:42.000
It took me so long to do this.

1460
01:38:42.000 --> 01:38:46.000
God has taught this to me over, over.

1461
01:38:46.000 --> 01:38:47.000
Oh, how long?

1462
01:38:47.000 --> 01:38:48.000
I don't know.

1463
01:38:48.000 --> 01:38:49.000
I don't know.

1464
01:38:49.000 --> 01:38:58.000
Generally speaking, it's probably longer than this because you know how the Lord just plant seeds, but he's been teaching me this for like.

1465
01:38:58.000 --> 01:39:00.000
16 years.

1466
01:39:00.000 --> 01:39:01.000
Hmm.

1467
01:39:01.000 --> 01:39:04.000
I mean, y'all are six weeks in.

1468
01:39:04.000 --> 01:39:07.000
Or you if you want to see it that way.

1469
01:39:07.000 --> 01:39:11.000
You've just been doing this since the summer. I had 16 years.

1470
01:39:11.000 --> 01:39:16.000
So y'all are fast. Y'all are really fast.

1471
01:39:16.000 --> 01:39:22.000
It's just, but the reason sorry I'm having to plug my.

1472
01:39:22.000 --> 01:39:29.000
And so y'all are really, really fast. In fact, that's why.

1473
01:39:29.000 --> 01:39:31.000
I'm sorry, my.

1474
01:39:31.000 --> 01:39:32.000
No, that's fine.

1475
01:39:32.000 --> 01:39:34.000
I just need to.

1476
01:39:34.000 --> 01:39:42.000
Yeah.

1477
01:39:43.000 --> 01:39:46.000
By the way, I'm fine on time, but are you.

1478
01:39:46.000 --> 01:39:48.000
Oh, I'm okay. Yeah.

1479
01:39:48.000 --> 01:39:52.000
Okay, because, you know, I am.

1480
01:39:52.000 --> 01:39:56.000
Just want to make sure.

1481
01:39:56.000 --> 01:40:00.000
Yeah, I'm fine.

1482
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:04.240
15 years. And then the, and I didn't know what it was I was

1483
01:40:04.240 --> 01:40:09.320
doing. I didn't know what was going on and whatever. And then

1484
01:40:09.320 --> 01:40:12.220
there's some way in which what it is that I learned,

1485
01:40:12.220 --> 01:40:16.080
especially a few years ago, when God really started like honing

1486
01:40:16.080 --> 01:40:20.320
in the message of like what I was of what it all meant. And I

1487
01:40:20.320 --> 01:40:24.400
didn't, there's some aspects in which I did have someone to help

1488
01:40:24.400 --> 01:40:28.680
me on certain things. But, and like kind of exposed me to

1489
01:40:28.680 --> 01:40:34.640
certain words or certain, certain ways of operating, how

1490
01:40:34.640 --> 01:40:37.880
to how to put that. I don't know. Anyway, I did have someone

1491
01:40:37.880 --> 01:40:43.160
teach me some things. But the majority of what I've learned is

1492
01:40:43.160 --> 01:40:47.720
just between, you know, it's between me and the Lord. And,

1493
01:40:48.240 --> 01:40:51.880
and so it was very, and so there were certain aspects that took

1494
01:40:51.880 --> 01:40:57.320
16 years or other things that happened in a very condensed

1495
01:40:57.320 --> 01:41:00.800
amount of time, like say, for instance, I know, year and a

1496
01:41:00.800 --> 01:41:06.200
half, two years, maybe it's been two years. And, and yeah, it was

1497
01:41:06.200 --> 01:41:12.520
something like that. And, and, but, but remember that y'all are

1498
01:41:12.520 --> 01:41:16.120
doing it in a very condensed amount of time, partly because

1499
01:41:16.120 --> 01:41:19.440
I've learned to and it's because I was the pioneer, I was a

1500
01:41:19.440 --> 01:41:25.320
pioneer. So I learned I, it was harder for me. And it took more

1501
01:41:25.320 --> 01:41:30.480
time than and it makes it easier for the people that come

1502
01:41:30.480 --> 01:41:36.320
after, because I can, you know, as a pioneer, you learn kind of

1503
01:41:36.320 --> 01:41:39.160
like all the tricks, and all because you've met you're the

1504
01:41:39.160 --> 01:41:42.080
one who's made all the mistakes, and you learn how to articulate

1505
01:41:42.080 --> 01:41:46.640
it in specific ways, etc. So, so y'all are have actually learned

1506
01:41:46.640 --> 01:41:52.640
stuff really fast. For me, it took it was a lot of pain, and a

1507
01:41:52.640 --> 01:41:57.000
lot of years, and I didn't know what was going on. I didn't, I

1508
01:41:57.000 --> 01:42:00.880
just knew that life was meant to be lived differently than how I

1509
01:42:00.880 --> 01:42:05.000
was seeing everybody else live it. And, and so whenever I asked

1510
01:42:05.000 --> 01:42:08.880
people about certain questions, they would give me the the

1511
01:42:08.920 --> 01:42:13.120
godly, or worldly answers. And I'm like, there's something

1512
01:42:13.120 --> 01:42:16.840
wrong, even the godly ones. I'm like, No, I don't. I know that

1513
01:42:16.840 --> 01:42:20.080
that's how everybody else does it. And I was always told,

1514
01:42:20.080 --> 01:42:24.000
well, actually, you know, you need to respect other people's

1515
01:42:24.480 --> 01:42:28.800
not experiences, but the fact that, you know, we've, that

1516
01:42:28.800 --> 01:42:31.440
other people have lived longer than you have. And therefore,

1517
01:42:31.440 --> 01:42:35.320
there are things that they know, and everybody that comes along

1518
01:42:35.320 --> 01:42:37.560
thinks that they're going to learn something different and

1519
01:42:37.560 --> 01:42:41.080
whatever. And I'm like, Yeah, but I know that there is, is

1520
01:42:41.080 --> 01:42:43.680
there something in me anyway? So it was just very, very

1521
01:42:43.680 --> 01:42:48.400
challenging. And so it was a lot longer and harder for me than

1522
01:42:48.400 --> 01:42:53.960
for y'all. So y'all really are going through it very fast. So

1523
01:42:53.960 --> 01:42:57.760
don't get frustrated just because I'm putting these these

1524
01:42:57.920 --> 01:43:01.040
just because I'm making the program a certain amount of time

1525
01:43:01.040 --> 01:43:05.360
like of six weeks, you know, don't think that you're there,

1526
01:43:05.360 --> 01:43:09.680
you're supposed to reach a certain that you're supposed to

1527
01:43:09.680 --> 01:43:12.640
be operating in all of these areas of your life by the time

1528
01:43:12.640 --> 01:43:16.440
of six weeks, what I try to do, and the reason actually why it's

1529
01:43:16.440 --> 01:43:19.320
even that long, because I want to actually reduce the rest

1530
01:43:19.320 --> 01:43:24.600
intensive to two weeks. The reason why I have six weeks is

1531
01:43:24.600 --> 01:43:28.920
to allow life to come up. I don't need this long to teach

1532
01:43:28.920 --> 01:43:32.560
it. I can teach it. Well, for one thing, all you need is that

1533
01:43:32.560 --> 01:43:34.960
one sentence, but then people wonder, well, how do I apply

1534
01:43:34.960 --> 01:43:39.920
that sentence? So I taught that 17 plus hours, I taught that in

1535
01:43:39.920 --> 01:43:43.720
three and a half days. And that was only and again, it's only

1536
01:43:43.720 --> 01:43:49.240
17 hours. So there's like huge number of hours each day that we

1537
01:43:49.240 --> 01:43:51.880
didn't meet. And then I let everybody like kind of rest or

1538
01:43:51.880 --> 01:43:55.440
take a nap or go visit or whatever. So it wasn't solid. It

1539
01:43:55.440 --> 01:43:59.760
was only three and a half days. I did six weeks for y'all. Why?

1540
01:43:59.880 --> 01:44:06.120
Because I want to allow life situations to come up, where

1541
01:44:06.120 --> 01:44:09.080
y'all start questioning things like wait a minute, what do I do

1542
01:44:09.080 --> 01:44:11.840
now? I thought that I got it. But then this thing came up and

1543
01:44:11.840 --> 01:44:15.520
I didn't know what to do. And I want to be available for people

1544
01:44:15.520 --> 01:44:18.600
to be able to ask questions as life comes up. So that's why I

1545
01:44:18.600 --> 01:44:23.080
put like six weeks on it. But, but we just have to live this

1546
01:44:23.080 --> 01:44:27.720
out. We just life just comes up. There's all of this stuff that's

1547
01:44:27.720 --> 01:44:31.240
deep down in us, that just needs to still come up. There's still

1548
01:44:31.280 --> 01:44:34.920
stuff in me that's still coming up so much stuff. In fact, I

1549
01:44:34.920 --> 01:44:38.600
feel like the more that I the more that the more time that I

1550
01:44:38.600 --> 01:44:42.640
live, the more I realize I'm not in rest. Like, oh my word, I

1551
01:44:42.640 --> 01:44:45.320
feel like the majority of my life is actually not in rest.

1552
01:44:45.320 --> 01:44:49.440
And like, how can this be? But it's because there is so much

1553
01:44:49.840 --> 01:44:55.000
creation and flesh to overcome. But that's what I'm doing here.

1554
01:44:55.360 --> 01:44:59.720
That's what I'm here for. I'm not it will it's not what I'm

1555
01:44:59.720 --> 01:45:00.080
here for.

1556
01:45:00.000 --> 01:45:02.840
or I'm actually here to express God,

1557
01:45:02.840 --> 01:45:05.760
but the fact that because of the fall,

1558
01:45:05.760 --> 01:45:07.900
creation isn't believing God,

1559
01:45:07.900 --> 01:45:11.480
the first thing I have to do so that they can see God

1560
01:45:11.480 --> 01:45:13.280
is to overcome.

1561
01:45:13.280 --> 01:45:16.320
So anyway, it's what we're all doing.

1562
01:45:16.320 --> 01:45:20.440
And in a manner of speaking,

1563
01:45:20.440 --> 01:45:24.360
it's this lifetime process until,

1564
01:45:24.360 --> 01:45:26.160
I mean, think about it, Abraham,

1565
01:45:26.160 --> 01:45:29.760
it says this in like the hall of faith,

1566
01:45:29.760 --> 01:45:32.920
it says that Abraham and Jacob and all of these people,

1567
01:45:32.920 --> 01:45:36.600
they had faith for a promise

1568
01:45:36.600 --> 01:45:38.560
that they never saw the fulfillment of.

1569
01:45:39.720 --> 01:45:41.360
And they live longer than we did.

1570
01:45:43.360 --> 01:45:47.960
So the thing is that they were overcoming creation

1571
01:45:47.960 --> 01:45:52.040
thousands of years ago, and we're all doing that.

1572
01:45:52.040 --> 01:45:57.040
So this is just, so rest is not as a lifestyle,

1573
01:45:57.120 --> 01:45:59.100
it's a way of approaching,

1574
01:46:01.480 --> 01:46:06.400
I mean, it's a way of approaching life and creation now

1575
01:46:06.400 --> 01:46:11.040
from the perspective that we're free and we're God.

1576
01:46:11.040 --> 01:46:14.600
And we don't have to create our life for ourselves,

1577
01:46:14.600 --> 01:46:16.880
so to speak, God does that.

1578
01:46:16.880 --> 01:46:18.520
He's responsible for the outcome.

1579
01:46:18.520 --> 01:46:22.120
So in other words, y'all are doing great.

1580
01:46:22.120 --> 01:46:26.880
Everybody has their own background perspective

1581
01:46:27.840 --> 01:46:32.600
and ancestor DNA that they've inherited,

1582
01:46:32.600 --> 01:46:34.320
experiences that they've had,

1583
01:46:34.320 --> 01:46:37.040
beliefs that they've come into agreement with or whatever.

1584
01:46:37.040 --> 01:46:40.920
Everyone has their own unique aspect of creation

1585
01:46:40.920 --> 01:46:42.540
that they need to overcome.

1586
01:46:44.360 --> 01:46:47.160
And people that take,

1587
01:46:49.960 --> 01:46:51.700
this just gives you a general idea.

1588
01:46:52.280 --> 01:46:55.360
Generally speaking, people that take longer,

1589
01:46:56.460 --> 01:46:59.380
it generally means that they have more to overcome,

1590
01:46:59.380 --> 01:47:01.580
meaning like, I don't mean more to overcome,

1591
01:47:01.580 --> 01:47:03.940
like, I don't know how to explain it,

1592
01:47:03.940 --> 01:47:07.620
but they're given a very strong,

1593
01:47:07.620 --> 01:47:12.620
they're given a responsibility to overcome something

1594
01:47:12.700 --> 01:47:15.460
that is extremely challenging,

1595
01:47:15.460 --> 01:47:17.940
that they have been equipped to overcome

1596
01:47:17.940 --> 01:47:20.180
and other people haven't.

1597
01:47:20.220 --> 01:47:25.220
So I greatly commend people that really struggle,

1598
01:47:25.620 --> 01:47:29.620
but continue to choose to do it and continue to,

1599
01:47:29.620 --> 01:47:33.460
because they've been given something that is,

1600
01:47:34.300 --> 01:47:35.660
and they've been held,

1601
01:47:39.020 --> 01:47:41.380
they've been given a great responsibility.

1602
01:47:41.380 --> 01:47:42.540
They have been entrusted,

1603
01:47:42.540 --> 01:47:44.460
that's the word that I'm trying to look for.

1604
01:47:44.460 --> 01:47:46.500
They've been entrusted with something

1605
01:47:46.500 --> 01:47:49.220
very precious to the Lord.

1606
01:47:49.220 --> 01:47:51.780
A very precious aspect of creation,

1607
01:47:51.780 --> 01:47:55.240
because God says, hey, with me, you can do this.

1608
01:47:56.460 --> 01:47:57.300
So we need-

1609
01:47:57.300 --> 01:47:59.340
It feels like you're a very, very big ship

1610
01:47:59.340 --> 01:48:01.640
that needs to change, to turn.

1611
01:48:01.640 --> 01:48:04.100
Yeah, exactly, yeah.

1612
01:48:04.100 --> 01:48:07.700
You know that you don't turn that ship like this,

1613
01:48:08.740 --> 01:48:10.300
you want the whole ship to turn

1614
01:48:10.300 --> 01:48:12.100
and go in a different direction.

1615
01:48:12.100 --> 01:48:15.320
I think I'm frustrated.

1616
01:48:16.320 --> 01:48:21.320
Also that some of the things I feel I've been learning,

1617
01:48:21.760 --> 01:48:25.000
like God has taught me in different ways over the years,

1618
01:48:25.000 --> 01:48:27.600
a little bit, like for instance, living in faith,

1619
01:48:27.600 --> 01:48:30.480
but other things I'm just like baffled that I haven't,

1620
01:48:30.480 --> 01:48:34.600
and probably kind of sad that I haven't learned it before,

1621
01:48:34.600 --> 01:48:36.680
or I have to learn it this late in life,

1622
01:48:36.680 --> 01:48:39.440
or all the things that I could have avoided,

1623
01:48:39.440 --> 01:48:43.160
or all the hurt and pain and struggles

1624
01:48:43.160 --> 01:48:45.000
that could have been different

1625
01:48:45.000 --> 01:48:47.120
and living in so much pain for so long,

1626
01:48:47.120 --> 01:48:49.600
and maybe I didn't have to.

1627
01:48:52.360 --> 01:48:54.520
So I think that's also like maybe a little bit grief

1628
01:48:54.520 --> 01:48:59.520
alongside with it, because I am 40, I'm not 20 years old,

1629
01:48:59.520 --> 01:49:02.160
and kind of just like, life just started.

1630
01:49:02.160 --> 01:49:04.320
It's just like I've lived so many years

1631
01:49:04.320 --> 01:49:07.320
of so much hardship, and I'm like,

1632
01:49:07.320 --> 01:49:10.540
some of these things, why haven't I seen it before?

1633
01:49:10.540 --> 01:49:12.540
I've read the Bible and sought God,

1634
01:49:13.940 --> 01:49:18.940
and then I'm like kind of sad that it's like happening.

1635
01:49:19.900 --> 01:49:20.740
Yeah.

1636
01:49:20.740 --> 01:49:22.340
And that's why I think I wanted,

1637
01:49:22.340 --> 01:49:26.740
then I'm like, I need to kind of roll faster,

1638
01:49:26.740 --> 01:49:28.940
but then it takes as long as it takes.

1639
01:49:28.940 --> 01:49:31.020
I can't just push myself to believe

1640
01:49:31.020 --> 01:49:33.980
and have faith in something when I haven't chosen it

1641
01:49:33.980 --> 01:49:37.260
or understood, or kind of just like taking it in.

1642
01:49:37.260 --> 01:49:42.260
I need to, I don't know, just accept I'm at where I'm at,

1643
01:49:42.940 --> 01:49:45.940
I'm the age that I am, and I've learned what I've learned,

1644
01:49:45.940 --> 01:49:48.700
and there's a lot of things I didn't learn,

1645
01:49:48.700 --> 01:49:52.440
and I don't know, but I think it's a little bit grief in it.

1646
01:49:53.580 --> 01:49:55.220
Yeah, a lot of people experience that.

1647
01:49:55.220 --> 01:49:59.180
In fact, Casey mentioned that the other day in a,

1648
01:50:00.000 --> 01:50:07.480
And in one of her journey sharings, she mentioned that she said, you know, one of the things

1649
01:50:07.480 --> 01:50:17.320
that I'm struggling with now is grief over the fact that I didn't learn this sooner and,

1650
01:50:17.320 --> 01:50:20.360
and, but remember that.

1651
01:50:20.360 --> 01:50:25.880
And so that's another area in which we can just shift into rest, because remember that

1652
01:50:25.880 --> 01:50:29.480
the, we're not trying to arrive somewhere.

1653
01:50:29.480 --> 01:50:34.280
God isn't holding us accountable to arrive at a particular destination.

1654
01:50:34.280 --> 01:50:37.680
He's just like, develop your relationship with me.

1655
01:50:37.680 --> 01:50:42.160
Are you developing your relationship with me, a relationship with me right now?

1656
01:50:42.160 --> 01:50:43.560
Of course you are.

1657
01:50:43.560 --> 01:50:44.560
Therefore you're doing it.

1658
01:50:44.560 --> 01:50:46.000
This is, this is it.

1659
01:50:46.000 --> 01:50:47.000
We're doing it.

1660
01:50:47.000 --> 01:50:54.640
You know, is it, and so you're, you're fulfilling your, the purpose for which you were, you

1661
01:50:54.640 --> 01:50:58.840
were created as, as a, as a spirit.

1662
01:50:58.840 --> 01:51:03.520
I'm not talking about like, you know, soul and body and, and the fact that you're here

1663
01:51:03.520 --> 01:51:04.520
in creation.

1664
01:51:04.520 --> 01:51:09.800
I'm just talking about fact of why God created you as a spirit, you know, before the foundations

1665
01:51:09.800 --> 01:51:15.640
of the earth or, you know, Ephesians one, four, you know it's just for the development

1666
01:51:15.640 --> 01:51:16.920
of relationship.

1667
01:51:16.920 --> 01:51:23.320
It's not to get somewhere because God's God won't from, from what I can tell anyway, it

1668
01:51:23.320 --> 01:51:30.200
doesn't look like God's gonna ever has created things to, for us to get anywhere anyway,

1669
01:51:30.200 --> 01:51:34.240
because it looks like he's always expanding and therefore that there was always more about

1670
01:51:34.240 --> 01:51:35.240
him to learn.

1671
01:51:35.240 --> 01:51:39.320
So there's, there's no place to be.

1672
01:51:39.320 --> 01:51:43.960
So after we bed or die, we live forever with Christ.

1673
01:51:43.960 --> 01:51:50.440
So it's kind of always co-create with God throughout eternity, we will always grow with

1674
01:51:50.440 --> 01:51:51.440
him.

1675
01:51:51.560 --> 01:51:54.600
We will always have new knowledge and new revelation of him.

1676
01:51:54.600 --> 01:52:00.480
So in that way, being past 40 doesn't mean like, oh, my life is almost over.

1677
01:52:00.480 --> 01:52:02.560
Why haven't I learned this yet?

1678
01:52:02.560 --> 01:52:03.560
No.

1679
01:52:03.560 --> 01:52:04.560
Yeah.

1680
01:52:04.560 --> 01:52:13.020
Because in fact, there's ways in which God can, can use what it is that you have gone

1681
01:52:13.020 --> 01:52:15.200
through up until now.

1682
01:52:15.200 --> 01:52:20.040
And the fact that you are learning about, you know, rest and freedom in him at your

1683
01:52:20.040 --> 01:52:26.480
age, because of what it is that you've lived through and, and the other choices that you've

1684
01:52:26.480 --> 01:52:30.960
made and things that have happened or whatever, it can enable what it is that you learn in

1685
01:52:30.960 --> 01:52:36.720
rest and how you then live right now to be richer, because there are certain aspects

1686
01:52:36.720 --> 01:52:45.880
of, of, um, because up to this point, your life has been extremely valuable, extremely,

1687
01:52:45.880 --> 01:52:48.040
it's not wasted.

1688
01:52:48.040 --> 01:52:50.400
And now you're learning how to really do it.

1689
01:52:50.400 --> 01:52:56.760
It's not because in fact, what God will do is he takes all of this and then he, and then

1690
01:52:56.760 --> 01:52:58.200
he redeems it.

1691
01:52:58.200 --> 01:53:03.240
He, it's, it's like he, and so it feels like we're learning something all over again and

1692
01:53:03.240 --> 01:53:05.160
all my work, we're starting all over again.

1693
01:53:05.160 --> 01:53:07.640
And that's really actually not what happens.

1694
01:53:07.640 --> 01:53:12.360
God actually takes all of these things that we've lived through, and then he redeems it

1695
01:53:12.360 --> 01:53:18.200
so that it's actually very beneficial for the kingdom and for overcoming creation, et

1696
01:53:18.200 --> 01:53:19.200
cetera.

1697
01:53:19.200 --> 01:53:23.240
So everything in our life is actually ends up being all of those things end up being

1698
01:53:23.240 --> 01:53:28.800
extremely valuable, but it doesn't feel like it because we're used to viewing things, not

1699
01:53:28.800 --> 01:53:34.240
from a kingdom perspective and the perspective of God, but the perspective of, of, uh, of

1700
01:53:34.240 --> 01:53:40.680
the world, which says that no time is linear and you need to learn something earlier in

1701
01:53:40.680 --> 01:53:46.880
order to have, to have more time under this new understanding from which to approach things

1702
01:53:46.880 --> 01:53:50.840
because you need time in order for things to happen.

1703
01:53:50.840 --> 01:53:51.840
And that's bogus.

1704
01:53:52.840 --> 01:53:54.840
It's like, you don't need time.

1705
01:53:54.840 --> 01:53:59.920
I I'm outside of time and I'm very valuable.

1706
01:53:59.920 --> 01:54:02.440
It's like, and your spirit is outside of time.

1707
01:54:02.440 --> 01:54:04.160
Time is not needed.

1708
01:54:04.160 --> 01:54:05.440
Time is a tool.

1709
01:54:05.440 --> 01:54:08.160
Time is just, it's just an aspect of creation.

1710
01:54:08.160 --> 01:54:11.120
That's allowed to partner with us, you know, as we do stuff.

1711
01:54:11.120 --> 01:54:12.840
So it's not a limitation.

1712
01:54:12.840 --> 01:54:20.280
I mean, God, even God, even, you know, stopped the stocks time to allow, uh, to allow, uh,

1713
01:54:20.280 --> 01:54:23.160
you know, Joshua to win the battle and all of that.

1714
01:54:23.160 --> 01:54:26.680
Remember we stopped the sun in the sky for a certain amount of time and he did that twice.

1715
01:54:26.680 --> 01:54:31.200
I don't remember what the other time in the Bible was, but anyway, he's done that twice

1716
01:54:31.200 --> 01:54:33.640
and it's just anyway.

1717
01:54:33.640 --> 01:54:40.440
So the thing is, if you, we kind of can, cause I had the same thing.

1718
01:54:40.440 --> 01:54:45.040
I had not only grief, I had a flat out midlife identity crisis.

1719
01:54:45.040 --> 01:54:54.880
I mean, I, I, I never felt so, um, I don't know, despondent in my life.

1720
01:54:54.880 --> 01:55:00.000
I didn't, I didn't know how to survive because I just felt.

1721
01:55:00.000 --> 01:55:02.760
Like the bottom had just come out from everything.

1722
01:55:02.760 --> 01:55:05.760
That was four years ago, December, 2018.

1723
01:55:07.000 --> 01:55:10.000
I had the biggest midlife identity crisis.

1724
01:55:10.440 --> 01:55:15.840
And I thought, I cannot believe I'm 34 years old and how it is that I, what

1725
01:55:15.840 --> 01:55:21.080
it is that I've dedicated my life to doesn't work, just didn't work.

1726
01:55:21.200 --> 01:55:23.840
I don't know what works because at that time I didn't know about rest.

1727
01:55:24.000 --> 01:55:25.040
I don't know what does work.

1728
01:55:25.240 --> 01:55:26.760
All I know is that this doesn't.

1729
01:55:27.480 --> 01:55:30.600
So I felt really hopeless because I didn't even have anything to go to.

1730
01:55:30.600 --> 01:55:32.720
I'm just like, this is all just so bad.

1731
01:55:32.880 --> 01:55:35.840
All of my, my brothers and sisters, they now have all of these positive

1732
01:55:35.840 --> 01:55:37.160
things that are happening in their life.

1733
01:55:37.160 --> 01:55:40.880
And I've got nothing, you know, because again, I was looking at things

1734
01:55:40.880 --> 01:55:45.000
from a worldly perspective that I don't, I'm not married and, and I don't

1735
01:55:45.000 --> 01:55:49.080
have kids and, and I don't have a house and all of the things back, you know,

1736
01:55:49.120 --> 01:55:54.880
back then, and, um, and I was like, and because again, I was measuring my value

1737
01:55:54.880 --> 01:55:58.480
based on life milestones that I'd passed by a certain amount of time, because

1738
01:55:58.480 --> 01:56:02.200
I just felt limited by time, you know, just like people talk about, like with

1739
01:56:02.200 --> 01:56:05.080
children, like, oh, we only have a certain amount of time, you know, while your

1740
01:56:05.080 --> 01:56:10.240
body can handle it and whatever we limit ourselves, you know, but by the world's

1741
01:56:10.240 --> 01:56:12.360
standards and God's like, I'm not limited by that.

1742
01:56:13.000 --> 01:56:17.480
Um, so anyway, I had to begin to view things very differently and God had to

1743
01:56:17.480 --> 01:56:22.360
show me and part of it, he just showed me by experience and that's how I learned

1744
01:56:22.360 --> 01:56:25.520
these things is I began to watch it really happen and like on my word, it's

1745
01:56:25.520 --> 01:56:30.920
true that God's just like, you know, actually just you developing your

1746
01:56:30.920 --> 01:56:35.800
relationship with me, you being in a moment and us enjoying the moment

1747
01:56:35.800 --> 01:56:37.880
together, he's like, that's the point.

1748
01:56:38.880 --> 01:56:41.160
You said, just develop the relationship with me.

1749
01:56:41.160 --> 01:56:45.480
And then how are you, how do you, and I went to express our relationship into

1750
01:56:45.480 --> 01:56:51.200
the earth in such a way that when we express how our relationship is developed

1751
01:56:51.440 --> 01:56:57.160
in, in the spirit, when we express that into the earth, it shows the earth God.

1752
01:56:57.600 --> 01:57:00.320
Because we're expressing us and God together into the spirit.

1753
01:57:00.320 --> 01:57:02.080
We're expressing that into the physical.

1754
01:57:02.720 --> 01:57:07.400
And when the physical sees what you and God look like together, it changes.

1755
01:57:08.520 --> 01:57:12.720
It has an opportunity it, and it's over it's that's how we overcome

1756
01:57:13.520 --> 01:57:16.240
flesh is then transformed into spirit.

1757
01:57:16.760 --> 01:57:22.400
It has an opportunity when it encounters God and a son of God and

1758
01:57:22.400 --> 01:57:26.680
they're really, and what they look like together, it has an opportunity to make

1759
01:57:26.680 --> 01:57:30.440
a choice, is it going to come into alignment or is it not?

1760
01:57:31.120 --> 01:57:33.160
And so that's all that you're doing.

1761
01:57:33.160 --> 01:57:35.720
You're not accomplishing something here on earth.

1762
01:57:35.720 --> 01:57:40.560
You're developing your relationship with God and you're expressing

1763
01:57:40.560 --> 01:57:43.200
who you and God are into the earth.

1764
01:57:43.280 --> 01:57:46.400
So number one, you're developing your relationship with the Lord and the spirit.

1765
01:57:46.440 --> 01:57:47.680
That's the first thing that you're doing.

1766
01:57:48.240 --> 01:57:49.880
That's most important focus on.

1767
01:57:49.880 --> 01:57:53.480
Remember, seek you first, the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all

1768
01:57:53.480 --> 01:57:55.000
these things will be added unto you.

1769
01:57:55.000 --> 01:57:57.760
So if you seek that first, all these other things will happen.

1770
01:57:58.600 --> 01:57:59.920
So you do that.

1771
01:58:00.240 --> 01:58:03.360
And then the second thing is you express yourself.

1772
01:58:03.920 --> 01:58:07.080
Cause remember Ephesians one, four, God chose us in him before

1773
01:58:07.080 --> 01:58:08.040
the creation of the world.

1774
01:58:08.280 --> 01:58:12.840
So you were created as spirit in order to simply have relationship

1775
01:58:12.840 --> 01:58:15.360
with God in union, and that's your point.

1776
01:58:15.960 --> 01:58:17.800
It's not to have a particular life.

1777
01:58:17.840 --> 01:58:20.680
It's not for God to be pleased with how you live your life on earth.

1778
01:58:20.680 --> 01:58:22.200
That's not why you were created.

1779
01:58:22.720 --> 01:58:24.720
Meaning like, it's not why you exist.

1780
01:58:25.160 --> 01:58:27.680
You exist long before the creation ever happened.

1781
01:58:27.960 --> 01:58:33.400
So anyway, um, and for a purpose outside of creation, then before the fall,

1782
01:58:33.440 --> 01:58:35.560
you know, God's like, Hey, I'm going to make creation.

1783
01:58:35.600 --> 01:58:40.200
And in creation, it was like, okay, let's take who it is that we are in spirit.

1784
01:58:40.640 --> 01:58:43.200
And let's express that into a physical form.

1785
01:58:43.920 --> 01:58:47.600
So all you're doing is you're translating, you're translating

1786
01:58:47.600 --> 01:58:50.080
from English to Chinese.

1787
01:58:50.480 --> 01:58:53.800
That's all you're doing, but you have, but you're using the same

1788
01:58:53.800 --> 01:58:57.520
sentence in English, you're just translating it into Chinese.

1789
01:58:57.560 --> 01:58:59.080
It's the same thing in the spirit.

1790
01:58:59.480 --> 01:59:03.200
You're just translating from spirit, something that already exists, and

1791
01:59:03.200 --> 01:59:05.240
you're just putting it into a different form.

1792
01:59:05.640 --> 01:59:08.320
You're taking water vapor and cooling it down.

1793
01:59:08.320 --> 01:59:11.800
So it becomes an ice cube, but you're not taking water and

1794
01:59:11.800 --> 01:59:13.200
changing it to orange juice.

1795
01:59:14.200 --> 01:59:15.760
So it already exists here.

1796
01:59:15.800 --> 01:59:18.240
Remember your relationship with God is number one.

1797
01:59:18.440 --> 01:59:19.520
That's your whole point.

1798
01:59:19.840 --> 01:59:22.680
Then you simply express that into a different form.

1799
01:59:22.880 --> 01:59:26.280
Once you express that into it, that's your point before the fall.

1800
01:59:26.800 --> 01:59:32.240
So what you're doing here is you are number two, your second purpose.

1801
01:59:32.280 --> 01:59:33.640
Your first purpose is just.

1802
01:59:34.160 --> 01:59:35.240
Your relationship with God.

1803
01:59:35.680 --> 01:59:40.240
The second thing that you're doing is you're just expressing who you and

1804
01:59:40.240 --> 01:59:42.880
God are into, into a physical form.

1805
01:59:42.880 --> 01:59:44.960
What does your relationship look like?

1806
01:59:45.160 --> 01:59:48.400
If it can be seen, she can't see it.

1807
01:59:48.400 --> 01:59:51.200
And so to speak, we have a hard time seeing it in spirit.

1808
01:59:51.880 --> 01:59:52.680
What does it look like?

1809
01:59:52.680 --> 01:59:55.320
If you can see it, what would it look like?

1810
01:59:55.320 --> 01:59:56.800
What business would it look like?

1811
01:59:57.240 --> 01:59:58.920
What is your relationships look like?

1812
01:59:58.920 --> 01:59:59.760
Who do you meet?

1813
02:00:00.000 --> 02:00:01.760
That's what it looks like.

1814
02:00:01.760 --> 02:00:05.040
So if it looks like, and then because of the fall,

1815
02:00:05.040 --> 02:00:09.200
creation, in order for God to be fully seen,

1816
02:00:10.320 --> 02:00:14.880
creation has to be, and flesh has to be overcome.

1817
02:00:14.880 --> 02:00:16.320
We have to overcome the flesh.

1818
02:00:16.320 --> 02:00:20.000
We have to change flesh from it being corrupted

1819
02:00:20.000 --> 02:00:22.600
to it being spirit and it being eternal.

1820
02:00:22.600 --> 02:00:24.680
And that happened after the fall.

1821
02:00:24.680 --> 02:00:26.720
That wasn't the reason that God created the earth.

1822
02:00:26.720 --> 02:00:28.960
God did not create the earth for us to overcome it

1823
02:00:28.960 --> 02:00:30.840
and for Jesus to have to die.

1824
02:00:30.840 --> 02:00:34.480
That came because Adam made a different choice

1825
02:00:34.480 --> 02:00:36.280
and that all of a sudden creation

1826
02:00:36.280 --> 02:00:37.880
went in this other direction.

1827
02:00:37.880 --> 02:00:40.720
God didn't choose that that's what he wanted

1828
02:00:40.720 --> 02:00:42.040
when he created creation.

1829
02:00:42.040 --> 02:00:45.720
He was like, no, creation is to express

1830
02:00:45.720 --> 02:00:47.120
who you and I are together.

1831
02:00:47.120 --> 02:00:48.960
And that's what he and Adam and Eve all did.

1832
02:00:48.960 --> 02:00:50.880
Who knows how many thousands of years

1833
02:00:50.880 --> 02:00:52.480
that the Garden of Eden was there

1834
02:00:52.480 --> 02:00:54.400
before Adam made his choice?

1835
02:00:54.400 --> 02:00:55.680
You know, who knows?

1836
02:00:55.680 --> 02:00:57.200
So anyway, it could have been billions of years.

1837
02:00:57.200 --> 02:00:58.040
I have no idea.

1838
02:00:58.080 --> 02:00:59.400
But the point is, God's like,

1839
02:00:59.400 --> 02:01:03.680
the point is not sin and overcoming sin.

1840
02:01:03.680 --> 02:01:05.920
That happened later.

1841
02:01:05.920 --> 02:01:08.760
That happened because Adam made the choice.

1842
02:01:08.760 --> 02:01:12.120
God's original purpose for creation hasn't changed.

1843
02:01:12.120 --> 02:01:15.640
It's still simply to express who we and God are together.

1844
02:01:15.640 --> 02:01:18.720
But in expressing who we and our God are together,

1845
02:01:18.720 --> 02:01:21.720
we now have this problem because Adam sinned.

1846
02:01:21.720 --> 02:01:25.120
We now have to overcome the flesh with spirit.

1847
02:01:25.120 --> 02:01:26.840
So that's number three.

1848
02:01:27.640 --> 02:01:31.000
So we've got like this, this like layering.

1849
02:01:31.000 --> 02:01:34.120
But our very first point is just to develop

1850
02:01:34.120 --> 02:01:35.400
our relationship with the Lord.

1851
02:01:35.400 --> 02:01:36.920
It's not to get anywhere.

1852
02:01:37.840 --> 02:01:42.240
It's not to be somewhere so that you need to feel bad

1853
02:01:42.240 --> 02:01:44.080
about the fact that you're not there yet.

1854
02:01:44.080 --> 02:01:45.600
You're not supposed to get anywhere.

1855
02:01:45.600 --> 02:01:47.000
You just do it.

1856
02:01:47.000 --> 02:01:48.360
You just develop the relationship.

1857
02:01:48.360 --> 02:01:49.640
You just learn more.

1858
02:01:49.640 --> 02:01:50.800
You just enjoy God.

1859
02:01:50.800 --> 02:01:52.880
You do life together.

1860
02:01:52.880 --> 02:01:54.720
And then you're doing it in this form.

1861
02:01:54.720 --> 02:01:58.680
You're expressing that into creation in the physical sense.

1862
02:01:58.680 --> 02:02:01.120
But because of the fall,

1863
02:02:01.120 --> 02:02:04.360
creation is basically an opposition to us

1864
02:02:04.360 --> 02:02:06.360
because it's afraid, you know?

1865
02:02:06.360 --> 02:02:09.440
So you try to prove to it that you really are

1866
02:02:09.440 --> 02:02:13.080
the goodness of God in physical form

1867
02:02:13.080 --> 02:02:14.960
so that it'll feel safe with you

1868
02:02:14.960 --> 02:02:18.120
so that you can express who you and God are together,

1869
02:02:18.120 --> 02:02:20.680
you know, into creation.

1870
02:02:20.680 --> 02:02:23.480
So anyway, so the thing, the whole,

1871
02:02:23.480 --> 02:02:26.600
my whole point in saying all of that is to relieve yourself,

1872
02:02:26.600 --> 02:02:28.880
you know, of all feeling all of this grief of like,

1873
02:02:28.880 --> 02:02:30.520
why haven't I learned this yet?

1874
02:02:31.400 --> 02:02:36.400
You, you, there's, there's, you're not behind.

1875
02:02:36.560 --> 02:02:39.520
You're just, the whole point is developing a relationship

1876
02:02:39.520 --> 02:02:41.760
and what it is that you've done so far

1877
02:02:41.760 --> 02:02:44.440
and all of this, these fleshly ways

1878
02:02:44.440 --> 02:02:47.120
that we've lived in our lives up to this point,

1879
02:02:47.960 --> 02:02:52.440
that we actually, God will redeem it.

1880
02:02:52.440 --> 02:02:55.280
And because of the choices that we're making now,

1881
02:02:55.280 --> 02:02:58.960
the choices that we're making now will redeem all of this.

1882
02:02:58.960 --> 02:03:01.360
There'll be ways in which all of these things

1883
02:03:01.360 --> 02:03:06.360
that have contributed to our life here on earth,

1884
02:03:07.520 --> 02:03:11.760
there are ways in which they will, they'll change.

1885
02:03:11.760 --> 02:03:15.760
They will be transformed into spirit.

1886
02:03:15.760 --> 02:03:19.360
It's aspects of flesh that because of our choices now,

1887
02:03:19.360 --> 02:03:23.000
those aspects of creation that are flesh, you know,

1888
02:03:23.000 --> 02:03:25.200
that we're like, oh my word, I've lived 40 plus years

1889
02:03:25.200 --> 02:03:26.920
and oh my word, I have all this flesh.

1890
02:03:26.920 --> 02:03:28.120
God's like, yeah.

1891
02:03:28.120 --> 02:03:31.800
Now that that flesh won't die.

1892
02:03:31.800 --> 02:03:34.080
Well, I mean, it'll die, but what I mean is like,

1893
02:03:34.080 --> 02:03:36.960
it won't like simply like not exist anymore.

1894
02:03:36.960 --> 02:03:40.360
He's like, no, now you've got all of this stuff

1895
02:03:40.360 --> 02:03:42.040
that can be transformed to spirit.

1896
02:03:44.200 --> 02:03:45.360
So it's not wasted.

1897
02:03:45.360 --> 02:03:46.240
It's not bad.

1898
02:03:46.240 --> 02:03:50.480
You're not behind, but if we look at it

1899
02:03:50.480 --> 02:03:54.600
from the world's perspective, then we think we're behind

1900
02:03:54.600 --> 02:03:57.720
because we think there's some place we were supposed to be.

1901
02:03:57.720 --> 02:03:59.800
And God's like, no, there's not any place

1902
02:03:59.800 --> 02:04:00.920
you're supposed to be.

1903
02:04:00.920 --> 02:04:03.480
You're supposed to develop your relationship with me.

1904
02:04:03.480 --> 02:04:04.880
And if you do that,

1905
02:04:04.880 --> 02:04:06.920
then all these things will be added into you.

1906
02:04:06.920 --> 02:04:10.120
And then remember, and let me just read you this last thing

1907
02:04:10.120 --> 02:04:13.080
and then we will go.

1908
02:04:17.200 --> 02:04:18.440
Let me see here.

1909
02:04:19.560 --> 02:04:20.680
Where is it?

1910
02:04:20.680 --> 02:04:24.080
Because I thought, and I was mentioning this

1911
02:04:24.080 --> 02:04:25.720
to someone the other day and they were like,

1912
02:04:25.720 --> 02:04:28.920
oh my word, I'd never seen that before.

1913
02:04:28.920 --> 02:04:30.680
I'd never seen it in this verse before.

1914
02:04:30.680 --> 02:04:32.520
And so I was reading it the other day

1915
02:04:32.520 --> 02:04:35.040
and I was just so struck by it.

1916
02:04:35.040 --> 02:04:37.600
And so let me see here.

1917
02:04:37.600 --> 02:04:42.600
It is Hebrews 11, six, or was it?

1918
02:04:43.240 --> 02:04:44.360
Oh, darn.

1919
02:04:44.360 --> 02:04:47.160
No, yeah, yeah, it is Hebrews 11, six.

1920
02:04:47.160 --> 02:04:51.240
And without faith, it is impossible to please God

1921
02:04:51.240 --> 02:04:56.240
because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists

1922
02:04:56.640 --> 02:05:01.320
and that he rewards the people who come to him.

1923
02:05:00.000 --> 02:05:07.580
those who earnestly seek him. So that's how we know that what it is that the

1924
02:05:01.320 --> 02:05:03.480
And that's what we're going to do today.

1925
02:05:03.480 --> 02:05:05.520
We're going to look at the word of God

1926
02:05:05.520 --> 02:05:07.480
and we're going to look at the word of God

1927
02:05:07.480 --> 02:05:09.560
and we're going to look at the word of God

1928
02:05:07.580 --> 02:05:14.180
object of our faith has to be God. Not what God will accomplish, what God will

1929
02:05:14.180 --> 02:05:19.020
do, where we're supposed to be by a specific time, you know, whatever. It's

1930
02:05:19.020 --> 02:05:23.180
just God's just like if he says, you know, seek ye first the kingdom of God and his

1931
02:05:23.180 --> 02:05:25.940
righteousness, what is he saying that we need to have faith in where he says

1932
02:05:25.940 --> 02:05:30.840
everything will be added to us afterwards. He said him, he said, if you

1933
02:05:30.840 --> 02:05:36.500
just focus on me and develop in your relationship with me, all of these other

1934
02:05:36.500 --> 02:05:40.460
things will happen. You know, you'll manifest who it is that you and the Lord

1935
02:05:40.460 --> 02:05:45.340
are into creation and you'll overcome creation so that the flesh changes to

1936
02:05:45.340 --> 02:05:49.960
spirit. But all you have to do is focus on the relationship and remember that the

1937
02:05:49.960 --> 02:05:54.280
relationship, so in other words, you're, again, you're not behind, there's

1938
02:05:54.300 --> 02:05:59.800
all these milestones that you need to hit. God says, no, just choose me, just

1939
02:05:59.800 --> 02:06:03.520
develop relationship with me. And remember, I don't have a specific place

1940
02:06:03.520 --> 02:06:07.940
you need to be. I'm just like, I just want you to just do it. When you wake up

1941
02:06:07.940 --> 02:06:14.220
in the morning, wake up with me, walk to the bathroom with me, do the dishes with

1942
02:06:14.220 --> 02:06:18.720
me, get on the bus with me, or if you have a, if you have a car, you know, in

1943
02:06:18.720 --> 02:06:24.920
the car with me, you're driving with me. We are living life. I'm not helping you

1944
02:06:24.920 --> 02:06:32.120
live life or watching your life, you know, holding you to an holding you to be

1945
02:06:32.120 --> 02:06:37.600
accountable for specific results and to hit certain thresholds. It's like, no,

1946
02:06:37.600 --> 02:06:42.840
you and I are living together. We're just doing stuff together. You're enjoying

1947
02:06:43.000 --> 02:06:47.600
it. We're because we're expressing to all of the things that we encounter in

1948
02:06:47.600 --> 02:06:54.720
life, in our car, on the road, the classroom, whatever, reading a book,

1949
02:06:54.720 --> 02:06:59.640
whatever, we are, we are doing it together. And we are expressing who we

1950
02:06:59.640 --> 02:07:04.520
are together into the world. That's all you're doing. You don't have to be

1951
02:07:04.520 --> 02:07:10.040
specific places by specific times or whatever. But we can look at things like,

1952
02:07:10.520 --> 02:07:14.200
Oh, my word, wherever it is, or rather I am is where I'm always going to be and

1953
02:07:14.200 --> 02:07:18.560
this is depressing and it's not going to change and whatever. And it's just not

1954
02:07:18.560 --> 02:07:23.600
true. God says, if you choose me and you choose to focus on it, all these other

1955
02:07:23.600 --> 02:07:28.080
things will happen effortlessly. So seek you first, the kingdom of God and his

1956
02:07:28.080 --> 02:07:33.080
righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you will be added unto

1957
02:07:33.080 --> 02:07:38.720
you. Not you have to add them. They will be added to you. He creates the outcome.

1958
02:07:39.480 --> 02:07:44.120
Anyway, so, I mean, I understand, you know, that we have a grieving process.

1959
02:07:44.120 --> 02:07:47.000
And I'm not trying to say, you know, Oh, we shouldn't be grieving or anything.

1960
02:07:47.000 --> 02:07:52.600
Jesus grieved. Grieving is part of like a human experience. I'm just trying to

1961
02:07:52.600 --> 02:08:03.280
address the source of the grief and try to say that isn't that that you're not.

1962
02:08:03.320 --> 02:08:08.920
And what do you call it? You're not behind. There's nothing wrong with you.

1963
02:08:10.000 --> 02:08:15.480
And you're and you don't have to agree that Oh, I should be somewhere that I'm

1964
02:08:15.480 --> 02:08:21.640
not. That you're being held accountable to a particular standard and a particular

1965
02:08:21.640 --> 02:08:27.680
milestone that you're not at yet. Does all of that make sense? So I mean, you

1966
02:08:27.680 --> 02:08:31.200
just have to walk this out with the Lord. So it's not like I can tell you all this

1967
02:08:31.200 --> 02:08:34.520
stuff and Oh, my word, you're just convinced. I'm just trying to encourage

1968
02:08:34.520 --> 02:08:38.840
you and you just take it before before the Lord. And then y'all just walk it out

1969
02:08:38.840 --> 02:08:53.080
together. But yeah, anyway. So yeah, are you okay? I'm okay. Yeah. So so don't,

1970
02:08:53.520 --> 02:09:00.920
again, don't get overwhelmed by anything. Don't try to learn how to do all of this

1971
02:09:00.920 --> 02:09:04.880
stuff that we'll be talking about in the rest intensive, the rest lifestyle.

1972
02:09:05.840 --> 02:09:10.640
No, yeah, don't feel responsible. Just focus on the love and the goodness. And

1973
02:09:10.640 --> 02:09:15.680
that will change everything. Just focus on that. And then just enjoy the rest of

1974
02:09:15.680 --> 02:09:20.800
it. Just like in just in just find it kind of like fascinating or interesting.

1975
02:09:20.800 --> 02:09:28.080
And if you just can't handle the exposure to it, and don't watch it. Because

1976
02:09:28.080 --> 02:09:38.880
you have lifetime access. So so anyway, so just do that. And yeah, yeah, just do

1977
02:09:38.880 --> 02:09:44.160
that. And so like what I said, instead, focus on on the fact that God is good.

1978
02:09:44.360 --> 02:09:50.080
In fact, he loves you. But if if that if you're struggling, so kind of keep that

1979
02:09:50.080 --> 02:09:54.680
in the back of your mind, like, okay, that's, that's kind of like the the, the,

1980
02:09:54.680 --> 02:10:00.080
I don't know, just the general idea of the cloud, you know, that I exist.

1981
02:10:00.000 --> 02:10:06.240
in, but what you focus on is those two videos that I recommended to you to watch.

1982
02:10:06.240 --> 02:10:11.880
The first one, again, I think that this one would be best to watch first, because it'll

1983
02:10:11.880 --> 02:10:19.160
give you context for the other one, and that is how to choose that, or not how to choose,

1984
02:10:19.160 --> 02:10:26.720
how to be enough for yourself, and then the second one I recommend watching is how to

1985
02:10:26.720 --> 02:10:28.920
empower yourself to choose.

1986
02:10:28.920 --> 02:10:31.320
I think that's what I said.

1987
02:10:31.320 --> 02:10:35.200
So I recommend watching this, because I think you'll be encouraged, because basically what

1988
02:10:35.200 --> 02:10:41.420
I'm telling everybody is, hey, everybody, y'all are great, enjoy yourself.

1989
02:10:41.420 --> 02:10:45.740
So I'm kind of like helping, like being an outsider, giving people permission from the

1990
02:10:45.740 --> 02:10:52.860
perspective of God of like, hey, enjoy yourself, and this is how you can enjoy yourself.

1991
02:10:52.860 --> 02:10:54.800
What desires do you have?

1992
02:10:54.800 --> 02:10:55.880
And then try to do those.

1993
02:10:55.880 --> 02:10:58.920
Sue and I have talked a bit about it, like say, for instance, with writing and other

1994
02:10:58.920 --> 02:11:04.920
things, but maybe these videos will help as well, because they came after me having to

1995
02:11:04.920 --> 02:11:08.200
talk to other people about it as well, because they were just struggling so much.

1996
02:11:08.200 --> 02:11:11.480
I was like, hey, you need to enjoy you.

1997
02:11:11.480 --> 02:11:17.880
Anyway, that's what I did for 10 months first, and God really used that.

1998
02:11:17.880 --> 02:11:27.480
From December 2018 until around like September or October of 2019, I just focused on choosing

1999
02:11:27.480 --> 02:11:34.840
that I was so, that God enjoyed me so much that I could do what it is I wanted to do.

2000
02:11:34.840 --> 02:11:44.920
I felt like I was risking my relationship with God, but I was choosing to have faith

2001
02:11:44.920 --> 02:11:46.800
that I was who God says that I was.

2002
02:11:46.800 --> 02:11:50.400
And I chose to figure out, okay, then I need to act like it.

2003
02:11:50.400 --> 02:11:53.640
So I chose me first, and that's how I chose to believe God.

2004
02:11:53.640 --> 02:11:56.760
I chose to believe that aspect of what God said.

2005
02:11:56.760 --> 02:12:00.960
I could have chosen to act on anything that God said, and so what I did, because I was

2006
02:12:00.960 --> 02:12:04.920
having too much trouble believing any of the other things, I thought, well, I'll choose

2007
02:12:04.920 --> 02:12:06.600
what he says about me.

2008
02:12:06.600 --> 02:12:11.080
He says that I'm good, and so therefore I think that means I can start doing some things

2009
02:12:11.080 --> 02:12:13.980
that I want to do, so I'm going to act like it.

2010
02:12:13.980 --> 02:12:16.240
And I don't know if God's going to like it or not.

2011
02:12:16.680 --> 02:12:20.320
All I know is that everything else hasn't worked, so I'm going to try this.

2012
02:12:20.320 --> 02:12:21.720
And I discovered things about God.

2013
02:12:21.720 --> 02:12:23.800
I discovered that he liked me.

2014
02:12:23.800 --> 02:12:29.880
I discovered that he really, really enjoyed me, but I only, but I, but I discovered that

2015
02:12:29.880 --> 02:12:36.320
by experiencing it, by choosing that he, that that's how he saw me.

2016
02:12:36.320 --> 02:12:41.840
And then when I began to act like it, I began to feel his pleasure in me doing those things.

2017
02:12:41.840 --> 02:12:48.640
And I'm like, oh, I guess it's true, so, but I didn't, he didn't, I had to believe what

2018
02:12:48.640 --> 02:12:50.960
he was saying and then act like it.

2019
02:12:50.960 --> 02:12:57.280
And then when I acted like it, I got the proof that, that it really was true.

2020
02:12:57.280 --> 02:13:03.840
So I helped create the proof because God said it, I acted like it, and then that's what

2021
02:13:03.840 --> 02:13:05.880
created the proof.

2022
02:13:05.880 --> 02:13:07.120
That's what changed my feelings.

2023
02:13:07.280 --> 02:13:12.160
Anyway, we have been talking a long time and I'm fine, but I wanted to, I'll let you go.

2024
02:13:12.160 --> 02:13:15.600
So, but I hope all this is helpful and encouraging.

2025
02:13:15.600 --> 02:13:17.280
So don't get overwhelmed.

2026
02:13:17.280 --> 02:13:19.200
Just enjoy the fact that God's good.

2027
02:13:19.200 --> 02:13:19.760
God's love.

2028
02:13:19.760 --> 02:13:21.440
Watch those two videos.

2029
02:13:21.440 --> 02:13:23.200
Choose, choose yourself.

2030
02:13:23.200 --> 02:13:24.880
Just be focusing on those things.

2031
02:13:24.880 --> 02:13:29.840
Don't be focusing so much unless you want to on boundaries and all that other stuff,

2032
02:13:29.840 --> 02:13:32.080
because that's just overwhelming right now.

2033
02:13:32.080 --> 02:13:35.360
It makes you, it's, it's triggering your performance.

2034
02:13:36.320 --> 02:13:41.600
We want, and we want to break that performance being triggered out of performance.

2035
02:13:41.600 --> 02:13:41.920
Yes.

2036
02:13:41.920 --> 02:13:47.600
So go back to that because you can only learn these things if you're not approaching them

2037
02:13:47.600 --> 02:13:48.400
from performance.

2038
02:13:48.400 --> 02:13:54.960
So if your performance is being triggered, we need to go back to what, what helps remind

2039
02:13:54.960 --> 02:14:01.040
what, um, uh, that the root of approaching things, not from performance, but love and,

2040
02:14:01.040 --> 02:14:02.880
and the fact that you're enough for the Lord.

2041
02:14:02.960 --> 02:14:06.800
Performance has been such a big part of my life since I was a little child.

2042
02:14:06.800 --> 02:14:09.760
I used to perform on stage since I was five.

2043
02:14:09.760 --> 02:14:10.260
Wow.

2044
02:14:10.880 --> 02:14:11.380
Yeah.

2045
02:14:12.320 --> 02:14:17.920
You know, I was like, uh, this perfect little church girl that the whole church loved.

2046
02:14:19.280 --> 02:14:22.800
So, and, uh, I was a singer and my sister.

2047
02:14:22.800 --> 02:14:27.920
So me, my, my sister started performing on stage in the church when I was five.

2048
02:14:27.920 --> 02:14:29.520
Oh, that'd be hard.

2049
02:14:29.520 --> 02:14:29.920
Yeah.

2050
02:14:29.920 --> 02:14:35.360
And it was great and amazing, but it kind of, it's, it kind of just was like, you're

2051
02:14:35.360 --> 02:14:36.480
always on a stage.

2052
02:14:36.480 --> 02:14:37.840
You're always performing.

2053
02:14:37.840 --> 02:14:40.320
Everyone loves you as long as you're performing.

2054
02:14:40.320 --> 02:14:40.880
Correct.

2055
02:14:40.880 --> 02:14:41.520
Yeah.

2056
02:14:41.520 --> 02:14:45.920
So it just created, some of it was very good and some of it was a bit unhealthy.

2057
02:14:46.880 --> 02:14:52.720
So, um, I think that what you're saying right now, just like to get out of performance

2058
02:14:54.240 --> 02:14:55.760
is a big thing.

2059
02:14:55.760 --> 02:14:59.360
And this, the word that God gave me for 2022.

2060
02:15:00.000 --> 02:15:05.200
at 2022. And I didn't understand it at the time was the word the light.

2061
02:15:06.640 --> 02:15:12.800
Oh, I love it. That is like the like yourself in the Lord. And I didn't understand it. But I just

2062
02:15:13.520 --> 02:15:20.240
believe that that was the word for this year. And now it's December almost and I'm starting to

2063
02:15:20.240 --> 02:15:26.480
understand it. Oh, that's wonderful. Oh, it's because he wants to enjoy me. It's because he

2064
02:15:26.480 --> 02:15:31.360
wants me to have fun. He wants me to figure out what I want, and that I don't have to perform

2065
02:15:31.360 --> 02:15:36.720
and I can just be and he loves me even if I don't perform or if I don't do anything,

2066
02:15:36.720 --> 02:15:44.880
or even if I don't change or, or agree with the Lord. Yeah, I agree with the Lord by delighting

2067
02:15:44.880 --> 02:15:50.640
in yourself. Yeah, yeah. So that he delights in you and you enjoy that and you delight in you.

2068
02:15:50.640 --> 02:15:54.400
And I think I think it's perfect. See, and I know I know you probably were like going

2069
02:15:54.400 --> 02:15:58.080
throughout the whole year going, well, Lord gave me this word. And then at the end of the year,

2070
02:15:58.080 --> 02:16:04.000
he's like, now we're driving at home. That's wonderful. Oh, that's special. See, God's very

2071
02:16:04.000 --> 02:16:12.000
good. Yeah. Okay. Well, I'll let you know. You're welcome. Good to visit with you Renata.

2072
02:16:12.000 --> 02:16:16.880
Yes, I'll see you next week. Okay. Bye. Bye.