I'm going to turn it over to Ashley.
Hey, Ashley.
I was so excited about our meeting.
What are you doing?
I'm good. How are you?
I'm good.
I was telling Chris the same thing when I met with her.
I've been so excited for our meeting.
The quieter ones I feel like I don't get to interact with as much.
I know each person individually and I have a relationship with each
individual person.
So basically I miss my friends.
I feel like I'm more vocal in the group than others.
And so anyway, you're one of the observers.
You sit back and listen.
Process. That's what I do.
Whenever I'm in groups, I, I I'm very quiet.
You wouldn't think so.
But I'm actually very quiet when I'm in groups of more than one person.
I just sit and I just listened to everybody.
How are you doing?
I'm good. I'm trying not to freak out, but yeah.
Yeah.
About what what's coming up these days.
My boss just told me yesterday that she,
well,
I just confirmed it today that she's taken another position somewhere
else.
15th. And I was like, you're supposed to mentor me.
You're supposed to like.
Yeah. So.
Yeah.
That's true.
The other thing is, I mean, you never know. I don't know what her.
What y'all's relationship is like, what her situation is like,
but one of the silver linings is.
It can help to like be.
If like, she's up for.
You know, helping you, you know, and mentoring you and stuff like that.
Then it can help for her to not be in that position.
Yeah.
No, she's going to be out of the company. Yeah.
So some of the,
sometimes like something like that might even be beneficial because,
because she's outside of the company,
she might be a bit more.
Free and feel a little more free to be able to mentor you in certain
things or talk about certain things, not confidential things, obviously,
but just, you know,
she's going to be able to talk to you and talk to you and talk to you
and talk to you and talk to you and talk to you and all that.
And you were already, you know, you just got this new position.
Was it two months ago?
Yeah.
Okay.
Now, is it a whole new company?
No, it's same company.
This whole time. Okay.
Well, I'm sorry.
Well, eight months now. So, yeah.
Okay.
Wow.
I just appreciate it because you're just like, well,
who is it going to be replaced by?
What is what's my experience going to be like?
And how's that going to change my day to day?
Yes.
An opportunity.
To trust in the Lord and meaning like, just be like, okay.
You know, right. Lord, well,
I don't know what the, what life is going to look like.
I don't know what the future is going to look like.
And so I just appreciate that.
And it's an opportunity to get to see.
You and how it is that you choose to reveal yourself in,
to my circumstance and into my situation. And so, but it,
it can be.
That it can be a bit challenging to make that decision.
You may be challenging in that, in that situation.
So I'm sorry that you're in a.
You're in a bit of a.
Of a transition.
Yeah.
Good.
So just overall, just how are you doing?
How's the process going of, of, of this journey?
I remember the last thing that I heard you say was that you were
talking about that.
You know, you were wanting to.
Be close to Lord, feel that intimacy, feel that presence,
you know, et cetera.
And so I was wondering if you could share a little bit of that with
us.
I mean,
I think it's a lot harder to be close to God than choose yourself.
And so I just know those little snippets.
And so.
Can you kind of like fill in for me and what can I help you with?
Okay.
Yeah. So I, the other night I couldn't sleep. So I was like, okay,
You know, I got out of the bed and it doesn't feel like you're not breathing anymore when you kind of transition sometimes, or is that just me just trying to hold my breath and let's transition.
well, I'm just going to go.
What do you mean, when you, well, I guess, I guess just either feels presence or feel like I was like, am I falling in, and then I start moving like I'm going to fall.
Isn't that amazing? Because it reveals to us our connection with between body, soul, and spirit, where if you're making a, if you're, if you're focused on something, your body's going to follow, you know, because your body starts believing and starts acting like whatever it is that you actually believe.
So whatever it is that you, that you think you're doing, and then, because we're trying to get our soul, we're trying to get an anchor for our soul first for, to kind of like to, to start like sending our intention somewhere of like, okay, fall into the Lord, et cetera.
But anyway, yeah, it's fascinating how our bodies will start responding.
That's what mine did. In fact, I haven't made that post yet. I've been waiting for the right time for everyone to kind of like be in the right phase of the journey for me to post it.
But there was, because otherwise it could just seem discouraging. And I mean it to come across as encouraging. And so I'm like, okay, I think that it's just because there's not enough safety that they feel that's built up.
So they can't hear this other until they feel safe. And then this will come across as encouraging instead of like discouraging like, oh my word more work.
But one of the things that is in that post is actually an old post from last year sometime where people were struggling with a part of their journey and, and I was just, and I was letting them know I was like, yeah, that feeling of death.
That's normal. You know, and I, and I explained a story of, I told them a story of when that had happened to me and my body had started to react like it was going to die because my soul thought it was meaning my soul thought it felt like it was going to die.
And so my body started responding to it, kind of like your whole idea that what you were talking about your body started falling when you were thinking about it.
And so my body started acting like it was going to die, meaning like it wasn't really dying but my mind went there and my body started to panic and because it thought it was in danger, even though it really was it, you know, and it started responding
like that and and all I did was I just I made the choice anyway.
And God was asking me to let something go. This is even before he taught me about letting go.
And all I knew is that he was telling me the thing I was holding on and holding on to and holding against him I had to stop that. That's all that I knew.
And this is this is literally years before he taught me about letting go and shifting address. So I was just asking Lord I'm holding this before you what do I do with it and he said let it go stop holding it against me stop holding it is like a valuable
part of your life that you are that you keep remembering, and then you keep holding against me that I've made your life so hard etc he said just let that thing go and I thought if I do I feel like I'm going to die.
I feel like this is part of my survival, but as soon as in that. So anyway, my body started reacting like I was going to die and that it wasn't going to survive etc.
And, but I fell anyway I was like okay God I choose you anyway regardless of the consequences, even if I physically die because that's what it felt like I'm doing it anyway and I'm just like, Lord, I, I, I let it go.
I stopped holding this in my life.
And as soon as I did everything in me went still, and everything shifted into rest it was I think the very first time I experienced that ever and I didn't even know what was going on.
And later I had the, I gave me the words of like, you know, it's shifting into rest is shifting into that rest that I told you about in Hebrews four etc. At the time I didn't know all I knew was how my body was responding, etc.
But, but anyway so you.
So, your experience you're saying has been like trying to connect with the Lord and feeling like you can't connect with him right. Yeah.
Yeah. So, so you said that you could the first time.
Yes.
So what happened the first time.
Um, I imagine the Lord like coming into my apartment and then watched him, or, you know, him come sit down next to me and then just, yeah, it was just kind of immediate.
Yeah, so they're there. For one thing that that was one of the things that I was going to suggest to people to do is, and that I listened to someone one time he used that as an exercise they said okay everyone closure.
eyes and just ask Jesus to show you where he is in the room. So in other words, just imagine
somewhere, you know, Jesus in the room somewhere, and then, and then just kind of see what he does
or watch that he's actually inviting you to go with him somewhere. So take his hand and let him
take you there or whatever. And that's how they kind of walked through their particular exercises,
connecting with Jesus. So I would recommend that not even thinking about, okay, well,
for Ashley, he came and he sat on the bed and whatever, for you, I would recommend just doing
what I'm doing, just imagining him, just okay, just like, in other words, memorize your room,
and then close your eyes, still picturing your room, and then just see Jesus somewhere. And who
knows how, how he'll appear. I mean, he could appear in white shirt and blue jeans. He could
appear in with, you know, his, his biblical robe and sash and, you know, or, or he could pick,
you could picture him like, I don't know, like the guy on the chosen. I mean, who knows how
he's going to show up to you. And then you just let him be himself and how he's revealed himself
to you. And then just have an experience with them. Just allow yourself to, to, to,
to not deny that and what you're imagining, not to deny it as reality and to just choose that
that's reality. And so, and to choose that you have asked God, God says that he's with you all
the time anyway. So you've asked him to give you a visual of it, and this is what you've got.
So engage with what you've got. Okay. Lord, that's how you appeared me. That's how you
reveal yourself to me. This is how you choose to come to me and show up like, okay, I'll engage
with that. Now, now what, you know, and then you'll, you'll, you'll sometimes just look at him
and there'll be something in you that'll change. It'll, you know, something I'll stir in your heart
or he'll invite, or maybe he'll gesture to you and I'll hold out your, hold out his hand.
And then you walk over to him, you know, and take his hand and then he takes you somewhere.
He shows you something else. In other words, all of a sudden in your imagination, you start seeing,
you start seeing a different scene, you know, we'll, we'll follow that. And just, just choose
that you were in the presence of the Lord because you already are. So you're just trying to,
in choosing that it's real and stopping denying it, then there's, it'll allow you to kind of,
to engage with it and interact with it. And there'll be a way in which you'll sense
the Lord more, but as opposed to trying to get a particular sense from him of like,
oh, I want to feel loved or, okay, you know, this is, I thought this was a love exercise,
you know, so here I am. And I'm just not, if we sometimes, if we decide what it is that we want
to happen, it can, it can keep it from happening. So if that doesn't work, stop everything,
stop the expectation, stop the requiring, even emotionally requiring an outcome. And then just,
just go, just go to whatever agreement that you can make with something that God had said.
Like in other words, okay, well, what is God said? You know, God says he loves me. Okay. Well,
I'm having a difficult time with that. Okay. So what else has he said? Well, he says that he's
always with me. Okay. Well, I'll close my eyes. Okay. Lord, just show me where you are. And then
immediate, you know, give it a second, you know, and who knows, he might show himself sitting on
your coffee table, or he might show himself like sitting right beside you. You might sense him
that he's appeared behind you. And then, so in your imagination, you turn around and look at him,
you know, I mean, you never know where he's going to show up, but then you don't have an expectation
of like, what kind of an experience that you'll have with them? Will you feel his love coming
towards you? You know, will you act, um, which is what I had talked about. I'm like, oh, you know,
just feel his love. Well, you know, if that doesn't work for people, I recommend that,
that release that, and no, not even expect that kind of an outcome. And then just like, okay,
we're just, what is the Lord going to do? I had someone one time in, um, in the rest intensive
series, you know, that we're watching the enter his rest one. I had a lady that was sitting in
there who told me the experience she had when I told them about, you know, hey, this is the,
you know, just to engage with the Lord and whatever she said, actually, it was so neat.
She's fascinating. And you could tell by the way she was talking, she'd never had this type of an
experience with the Lord. She was so excited. She's like, he came across like a field towards
me. I closed my eyes and there he was coming across the field towards me. And he reached his
hand out and I took his hand and he took me somewhere or he's like, come with me. I want
to show you something. And well, I hadn't walked her through anything.
of that, you know, I highly doubt that she'd ever had an experience where any with a, with a teacher,
whatever that told her that she could expect something like that from Jesus, who knows,
maybe she did, but knowing her to the degree that I did, I highly doubt it. Highly doubt that she'd
had that. And that was what that was because she simply presented herself to God and be like, okay,
God, how do, how do you want to show up? I'm just here and I'm believing that you're here.
So now how, because I am agreeing with you that you're here. How, how do you want to show up?
I'll receive you however you want to show up. So you just show me how it is. And you just watch it
play out in your imagination and you receive whatever it is that he gives. And then your
relationship with him will grow as opposed to, okay, God, I want to receive this from you or
whatever. Also, this is really fascinating. One time I, um, and I'm not saying that you're doing
this. I'm just kind of like expounding on this, on this subject. Um, and you never know when
sometimes so often I just try to like, take something that someone says, and then I dress,
try to expound on it. And what feels like to me is like this, like side note or like this bunny
trail and come to find out it was actually the spirit prompting me to, to tell a particular
story. That's helpful that you might need to know that I had no idea you needed to know.
Um, one thing that happened to me and I had not thought about this in so long is when I was, um,
is that I would go through times, especially right in the beginning. I really wanted to be
feel loved. I really wanted to feel loved by God, really wanted to feel loved by Jesus because that
was at the foundational core, something I was struggling with. And by the way, this was months
before I made that choice that I talked to y'all about, you know, what I refer to in that, that
writeup that I did called the ultimate choice, whatever this is months before then I'm like,
just trying to barely step out in. I was feeling a lot of rejection from the Lord.
And I was like at ground zero, I had no idea of who he was. And I was stepping out in bold faith
that, okay, he says he loves me. So let's, let's put it to the test. And so I, I was, I would go to
Jesus and I would want to feel loved, but what would happen is I was learning to see him in my
imagination. So I was practicing that and practicing, accepting it as reality instead
of rejecting it and denying that that was real. So anyway, I would close my eyes. And I remember
one time I went to him, it was one of the first times that I began to practice seeing him in my
imagination and, and choosing that that was actually real choosing to agree with God that
he was present and that he, he, he was coming to me and all that. And I saw Jesus and he came
towards me. And in me, I thought, I didn't think this in English, but in me, I desired, I strongly
desired. And it was like, I was reaching out and trying to pull something from him. I wanted to
experience being loved by him. And immediately when I did that, Jesus, who was a full grown,
you know, size man in my imagination shrunk and he got really, really small.
What have I done to Jesus? I knew I hadn't done something literally to Jesus, but I thought,
oh shoot, I wanted to engage with Jesus. And when I try to engage with Jesus and he's coming
closer towards me, he got really, really tiny. That's not how I wanted to engage with him. I
knew that it was a response to me. I thought, what have I done? And so what God, what Jesus
revealed to me is he, he, he showed me, he said, Ashley, he said, you were projecting onto me,
what you wanted from me. He said, stop projecting onto me, what you're trying to pull from me.
He said, just let me be who I am and let me show up as I am. And I asked that you receive that.
I'm like, okay. So as soon as I did, he shot up big again, but it terrified me for a second. In
fact, it happened twice. There was another time where, um, I, I saw Jesus sitting next to God,
the father, I closed my eyes, you know, in order to, to imagine it. Um, and, uh, in order to make
it easier for myself, cause again, I was learning, I was practicing and there was a, uh, there was
Jesus standing there and I walked over to Jesus and, and he, and he held me like a husband would
hold a wife. He held me like that, held me really close, really tight. In other words, it was really
like, like intimate. It wasn't like a friend. It was like, no, you belong to me. And so he was
holding me like that. And I think I, I thought again, I want to be, I want to feel loved by God.
I want to experience it. So there was a way in which I was trying to.
all from the experience and make the experience something in particular.
And as soon as I did, he shrunk and then, and I shrunk too,
because he's holding me. So both of us shrunk. It was like, honey,
I shrunk the kids or something. Both of us got really tiny, but God,
the father's still his full height, but both of us are really tiny beside him.
And I did the same thing. I backed off. I stopped hugging him in this, in the,
it's kind of, kind of weird. It was like there,
it was me outside of myself. So I was still hugging God.
He was still holding me.
But then there was this part of me that popped out as the observer and like,
what have I done? And, and I thought, man,
I had this beautiful experience. God was, God was giving me, you know,
himself in here. I have, I've messed it up. And again,
that was back when I was, it was so easy for me to fall into condemnation.
I still struggle with it every day. You know, I live this thing, you know?
So that's why I teach it is I still live it. But the thing is back then it was so
easy, so much easier for me to fall back into.
It was more of a default than it is now. And so boom,
immediately I went there. I'm bad. I've done something. God, I'm sorry.
What have I done? And it just feeling like a worm. And of course,
I was also a little terrified as well. Cause I thought, see,
this is God's response to me. I've messed up. And this is how he responds.
I'm really bad, you know? So anyway, I thought, what have I done?
And then, and then God showed me, Ashley, you have tried to make,
you've tried to create an experience of your own,
your own made up experience. Um, so in other words, it's made up.
Instead of just receiving me,
you're trying to make me be something that I'm not.
I want you to, I want to just show you who I am.
It's not that he wasn't loved, but he, I was like,
I was trying to make him make myself feel loved instead of
allowing him to love me, which was very different.
And so, um,
it was like I was trying to create the experience instead of just receiving
what he wanted. So anyway, I was like, okay, Lord, I'll stop doing that.
And so I stopped doing that. I thought, okay,
I just received God Jesus for who he is. And boom, he shot right back up.
And then I was still small. I'm like, man,
well, at least I fixed Jesus.
And I was so upset. I'm like, I've just messed up this huge experience.
But what Jesus did is he reached down and he picked me up and he held me
again. But this time I'm like the size of a child on him.
But the way he held me was if I was full grown.
And like he was in the beginning where I was like,
like a husband holding a wife or whatever,
and then he's holding me really tightly. So he's holding me in the same way.
Only I look like a child with my eyes, you know,
feet dangling off the ground and whatever.
So we held me back in the same hug and by and,
and jet. And, um,
anyway what happened is because I was allowing him to just be who he wanted to
be with me. I grew to full height again.
And so the rest of me filled out and I'm like, okay,
because I am, I am just simply experiencing what,
how God decided to show up and I'm just choosing to receive him as he chose to
present himself.
And so that's me loving God is receiving who he wants to give me of himself in
that moment instead of what it is that I wanted.
So I'm not saying that you're doing that is just something that popped into my
head as we were talking. I was like, Oh, that's right.
I had that experience and I'm just in case that's helpful. Um,
because the thing is that what it is that you're experiencing in,
in, in like not in where you're probably hearing me and other people talk about,
Oh yeah, I've had that experience here and going, well, why not me? You know,
well what's wrong. There's nothing wrong with you.
It's there's a way in which you have been approaching life that you thought was
required, but it's, but it's actually making it,
um, uh, your, your adding steps. It's not that hard.
It's not as much as you think is expected of you to bring to the situation.
You don't have to work hard and bring all that stuff to the situation. You,
that's not expected of you. You no longer have to carry that burden. Oh my word.
Now what I need to do now, what do I need to be now?
How do I have to position myself spiritually or emotionally or whatever to make
myself just right in order for something to happen? You know,
that's how we've been taught by the world.
And so often what is actually rewarded in the professional world that we've,
that we, there's always something that's expected of us.
And in order to get an outcome, we have to bring effort, exertion,
knowledge,
experience to the table in order to get an outcome. And God saying, no, you need to be
yourself. You need to choose that you're enough. And you coming into simply agreement with
me that you're already there. We'll let you experience the there. So anyway, so I just
wanted to encourage you with that. It's whenever we find some that something isn't working,
it means that it's easier than what we're making this making it out to be. So we have
to learn how we're making it. I don't want to say how we're making it harder. But what
I mean is like, what it is that we are doing that actually we're free to not have to even
do like that thing. But we don't even have to do that. We don't even have to feel that
way. We don't even have to, I don't know, just whatever. And so anyway, what are your
thoughts? Is any of that making sense at all? Or?
Yeah, yeah, it makes sense. Like I was trying to either recreate the experience or tell
him where he's at. So yeah, I guess it frees it hit, you know, Jesus up more to allow me
to seek him instead of here you are, you know, so inviting. Yeah, that's more, more
less expectations on me if I just start a conversation with them first.
Yeah, it's a, you know, and just like you said, just start in conversation choosing
that he's actually just really there. I mean, like, making how to put that. But anyway,
just making the decision, okay, you know what, I'm not going to resist or deny or feel
that it's fake or question the fact that he's there. It's it's, I just choose that that's
what it is that I that I believe, you know, and that he says that he's here. Okay, Jesus,
you know, I'm going to be talking to this chair. I mean, if you need to do that, you
know, as opposed to like, if like, for instance, you're struggling to see him, give
yourself an anchor point. He's just because he says he's everywhere anyway. Yeah, it's
like, okay, God, I'm going to give myself an anchor point because I know that that
because when I'm trying to allow you to show up wherever you are, I can't even like say,
for instance, that you do this, and it doesn't happen, which I highly doubt. But if
you struggle, like, I can't see him, I can't see him in the room. Why is me like
showing himself in the room or whatever, you you give yourself an anchor point to start
with and just say, God, this is the degree to which I can go in, in choosing that you
are who you say that you are, you say that you're here. Okay, then I'm choosing that
you're here. And I'm giving myself an anchor point of I'm imagining Jesus sitting in that
chair right now. And that is who I'm talking to. So God isn't worried about us limiting
him to being in the chair, because he's like, well, actually, I was by the door. The
thing what he's excited about is he's like, you're choosing to believe him, you're
choosing to find him, you're choosing to have faith in him to the degree that you can.
Like, okay, God, I don't I, for whatever reason, I'm not actually seeing you show up
just kind of like anywhere. So I'm going to have to figure out what can I do? Okay, I'm
going to I believe that you exist, I believe that you are present with me. And I'm going
to give my soul an anchor of putting you there. And so I'm going to engage with it, you're
really just kind of like helping yourself, helping your soul, which is trying to find
an anchor, you're just giving it an anchor. And then you are using that to help to help
give direction to your faith. But you're having fit but what it is that you're doing by
doing that is you're agreeing with God, God, you say that you're present. So what would I
do if I believed that? I would talk to you about these things, I would engage with you,
you know, just whatever. Because what it is that you're doing in that situation is you're
choosing him, you're choosing that he said that you're choosing that he meaning you're
choosing himself, like God, you are important to me. And and what are some of the things
that you've said use about yourself, you say that you're present, you say that you've
never that you're always with me, you say that you're one with me, whatever. So grab
a hold of whatever it is you can, and begin to engage with that, act on that faith. And
the faith will build, because you'll be experiencing with God, his truth that he really is there,
you'll start to actually your feelings will start to change. And it will seem more logical
to you, when you had to start out without the logic without the feelings, because they
weren't, you know, getting on board. When you actually begin to choose it of your own
free will to come into agreement with
God said, then it's putting the new it's, it's putting the new man in charge and your new man
will change your, um, your logic and your, and your beliefs. In other words, your feelings,
because your soul will begin to come more into alignment with what the, uh, with what the, uh,
new man is saying is true. And your new in the, in your soul is what is that, uh, is what is
telling you all of that doesn't sound logical, you know, or, you know, I don't think we believe
that. And we don't feel like that. We feel like we're making it up and whatever. If you choose
your spirit over what your soul is terrified of or what it doesn't believe, if you continually
choose that over your spirit will eventually win and your soul will start to believe it.
It, it, all of it's, it's, um, warring against the spirit will stop and it'll begin over time
to over, over time. It could be within five minutes. It could be, it could be within 60
seconds. It could be within a few days, you know, whatever, eventually though your soul,
because you're continually choosing your spirit over your soul, your soul will change and it'll
realize, huh, no, this seems more real than it did yesterday. So I'm coming to believe it. I'm
coming to more logically think it's true. Um, you know, I did read a scripture the other day that
seems to, to indicate that, you know, I'm not really sure, but you know, it'll start coming
around. So, um, anyway, is that helpful at all? Yeah. Yeah. I do feel like the more engaged,
the more I'm believing it. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So is there anything, um, about that or anything
about something else that you have like questions on or that you're running into like hurdles or
or anything? No, it's just, I guess, creating that margin. Like I love the community this time
and like, just, isn't it a lot more fun? It is. I know I tell everybody, everyone loves it. It's
so much fun. Yeah. And I like your, your posts in between too. So just go ahead. I'm glad those
are helpful. Yeah. Yeah. That's important for me to know because then I'll continue. I know that
that's whatever people are finding helpful and encouraging is what I want to continue to
implement. So that's good to hear. Yeah. But yeah, I don't know why I don't have questions.
I just, um, well, that's fine. Well, like, um, how are you, um, uh, how are you feeling about
the process and in going through the process? Like, are you, are you, um, uh, do you feel that
you are, I don't know. Um, well, the word, the word just escaped me, but do you feel,
do you feel frustrated? Do you feel like, Oh no, you know, I'm, I'm okay with,
with how this is developing between me and the Lord. I can see how things are developing.
Um, I mean, so how's all of that going? Cause everyone's at different phases. Some people in
here are very, they're, they're good. They're like, okay, yeah, I'm seeing the progress,
me and the Lord, we're just working through these things. And other people are just,
as you can tell from their posts, they're very frustrated. They're at the part of their journey
where they're just based on their background and their things with the Lord. They're just,
I'm running there at the part of the journey where they're just think like, Oh, what if I'm the one
person who doesn't get, I'm like, everybody gets it. Don't worry. Yeah. Yeah. I do have that kind
of in the back of my head, you know, the, am I gonna, you know, fail again. And, and when you
did that post about you releasing, and then you just have hopelessness. I was like, Oh, is that,
I think that's where I was headed. Um, because you know, I did the rest and I felt changed and I felt,
you know, a lot lighter. I didn't feel burdened at all. And, um, but then,
And when was that in the mini one that you did or in this one?
No, no, no. The mini one from before. Yeah. And then I got to the point where I was like,
I'm crashing and burning. And I was like, what happened, Lord? I thought, you know,
you gave me this job and I, I don't understand, but I do understand because I wasn't engaging
him. Like I stopped engaging after, you know, I just got busy and not, you know, choosing him,
even though I was busy. Yeah. I don't think that'll, I mean, I don't want to say that it'll
never stop because I can't keep this up. I can't keep working these hours. And
how many hours are you working out of curiosity? Um,
It's, it's easily 40 by the time I'm done with Thursday so Friday.
I was like I'm leaving early have my appointment so, but I feel like I need to get back on.
You know, and then the weekend comes and, you know, I guess last weekend.
Yeah, last weekend I was like, starting to feel that anxiety like I got to do some, at least an hour or two but then it just, it just ruins my night I feel like getting on.
And then I was like no Lord I'm choosing that I don't have to and then, you know, it. I was so glad that it went away. Yeah.
Good. Yeah, so.
Yeah, easily 11 hours a day I guess so that's okay. Yeah, in there, then that don't want to do it again.
I don't want to do it again and.
Well, I hope you probably haven't gotten a chance to watch it. Have you gotten a chance to watch the video that I did today the lives that I did.
Okay, I was gonna say I only did it like a couple of hours ago or something. And but hopefully that will be helpful because what I tried to do was I was just sensing where everyone kind of was in the, in the process right now.
I wanted to encourage everyone to just.
And this is, you know, partly based on your, your post that you did the journey sharing where you were mentioning that you know when choosing yourself that just kind of like really affected you know kind of like, I think you said you know just really rendered
you know, like, well, she's got the main one. And, and so hopefully this hopefully this will the one that I did will help, because I talked about the fact that when a year before I made that choice to fall to just like, okay, God, I finally let everything
go. And I choose you over my lifestyle, you know, and all that. Everything started when I finally abandoned trying to be good.
That I was good.
In other words that I wasn't as bad as I thought that I was that I chose that the desires within me were from a good place. They were from a good heart that was excited about life that had dreams and things that I wanted to do.
So the very first dream that I ever had before the Lord that I that I presented to the Lord after I made that decision. The first dream that I had was I told the Lord and I remember exactly where I was sitting when I told him this.
I said, and I said God.
I'm just letting you know that my that the dream that I am now working towards right now is to move to London and live in London for a while. And, and I just didn't feel like I could dream, or even dream, something like that, present it to the Lord, and
most of all, I didn't feel like I could begin working towards it. In other words, preparing but taking steps towards it.
I mean, my life wasn't a mess but I felt like I was in torment.
And so I decided to, I decided to, to change. And as soon as I did as soon as I told the Lord that.
And this was since I told the Lord that Lord, that's a dream and I'm actually working towards it. I plan I'm telling you I'm just informing you Lord, I plan to do it.
And, and I wasn't mean about it I was just telling him yes but what I'm going to do.
I'm telling you what he got so excited.
My, the spirit in me just rose up and just like came to life. And I remember sitting there in my rocking chair thinking, that's where you were.
You were in my dreams. You were in the things that I wanted. You're in, you were in me just being me without being spiritual, where I'm just like.
got some, got excited about some aspect of how I could live life, or I get excited watching how
other people live life and how they have a particular type of experience. And I pick
which types of experiences sound really exciting. You mean that you're in that, you mean that, that,
that I can find you by going inside of me and seeing all of the good and beautiful, exciting
things that bring me joy. That's where you were. You were in all the things that brought me joy.
I was shocked. I was like, you mean that I have been in pursuit of you. I've been avoiding you.
I've been stifling you trying to find you thinking that surely you weren't that good.
So if I was feeling that amount of like goodness and excitement and, you know, and joy and
exhilaration, that, that apparently wasn't you because you're in all the hard things.
So anyway, that was dramatic for me. And, and then all of a sudden I began to explore all kinds
of things. Now I, and God gave me a safe place in which to do it, in which to explore, because I'm
a baby. I'm just learning how to make decisions. So he gave me a safe, he provided a spiritual
environment for me to safely be exposed to things and to try things, just trying to discover who am
I and who is God and what does God approve of? So I got curious and I, and I decided, and I,
and because not being curious my whole life hadn't served me well, hadn't got me anywhere
with the Lord. So I'm like, okay, let's try the other, let's try being curious then.
Let's try, in other words, you have to, the only way that a child, they say, or how do I explain
this? They did a test on children that were like really, really young and they took different,
they took them, children from different environments, children that were from a very
safe, healthy home environments with parents, people, and then children that were like orphans.
And we're talking like little ones. We're talking like, I don't, like maybe toddlers, maybe younger
than toddlers. I mean, they were really little and they would put a toy that they'd never seen
in front of them and it, and they would, and they would observe him and they would notice that with
the, that there would be other people in the room when, when they would, like other adults who were
doing the testing or whatever, and they would watch the child and to see how the child responded. And
they, the, the children that felt safe, in other words, the children that had grown up in a healthy
environment, like we would with the Lord is what God would desire and want, how we would feel in
being raised by the Lord. We should be curious. And the children that grew up in a feeling safe
in their home environment, ignored the parents and all of the people around them. And they were
fascinated by this new toy because they could expand because their energy wasn't being expended
in, am I safe? And, and how are, and, and how are all of these people interacting and interacting
with me and what's going to happen? And I need to be ready. They, they felt completely safe that
never crossed their mind. And so the, so they had all of the energy to expend on exploring a new
toy. Oh my word, that's so much fun. And all this curiosity and all this discovery, and let's see
if it does this and let's see what happens when we do this. And, you know, and then eventually,
you know, all kinds of things can happen with those toys. I mean, it falls on the ground, you know,
you know, it's your, in your, in other words, there's some consequences to your action, but
what does the parent do when the, when the toy falls on the ground, the parent picks it up for
the 77th time, you know, picks it back up because the child it, so the parent is bearing the weight
of the consequences of the kid's actions, because the kid is just trying to figure out the world.
Well, what happens when I do that, you know, et cetera, you know, um, and we'll, what happens if
I do it like this? Oh, well, it doesn't roll anymore. Okay. Well, so if I do it like this,
Oh, finally it rolls, you know, and you're just messing with it. And it's only the children that
feel safe. That can be curious. Then they watch the kid, the kids who were orphans, the little
kids. Oh, it was just heartbreaking. They, they wouldn't play with the toy. They wouldn't touch
it. They wouldn't look at it because they're too busy watching. And they didn't look terrified.
They did look anxious though. You know, just kind of like little stressed, like,
well, what are you all doing? What's going to happen? And I mean, these are little kids,
little, but they had been taught by experience.
and by abuse and by separation.
Even sometimes it wasn't abuse, it was just separation
and feeling alone and isolated
to be very aware of their surroundings
because they weren't sitting so that
that didn't leave them safe enough
to be able to explore their world.
So they weren't as healthy like socially
and like being able to learn, et cetera
because too much of their energy
was spent on self-protection.
So it's the same way between us and the Lord
is when we aren't exploring and being curious
and discovering and just dadgum trying something new
or even like trying to allow ourselves
to feel something new or to dream,
it means we don't feel safe.
It means we're constantly looking at God,
at our circumstances because God's not protecting us
from our circumstances, it's what we think.
And God himself isn't safe.
We never know what the next thing is he's going to do to us
or how he's going to respond
or what he's going to require of us
or when he's going to be mad
or how he's going to stop talking to us.
And our fear of that separation
of that lack of communication,
that lack of interaction takes all of our energy.
And so we're always working towards
either trying to get a connection
or trying to maintain it when we find it.
So there's no energy left
and there's no focus to be able to explore
and to be excited,
but growth happens when people are curious.
Growth happens not just in the brain,
but actually in our life experience
when we are curious about something
and we actually step out and try the new thing to see,
well, what happens when I do this?
And so anyway, I have discovered that my life,
when I chose to believe that God was so good,
that I was safe with him being curious.
In other words, that God was so good
that he would provide a protective and safe environment
in order for me to be curious to discover
what did God create in the world?
What experiences are out there to have?
What could I choose to do?
Me and God together, what could I choose to do?
And if I couldn't hear God's voice
because I was struggling back then to hear his voice,
particularly about anything good,
I felt that I could hear his voice about all the bad things,
but come to find out a lot of that was just,
I don't know, Satan or me or something.
But anyway, I couldn't hear his voice about good things.
So I had to choose that his voice
was actually the good things that I wanted to do
that brought me excitement,
that brought me joy, that felt good.
Not the things that,
not the evil things that I wanted to do to protect myself.
And that made me feel good.
I'm not talking about that kind of feel good.
I'm talking about that stuff that brings you life,
that makes you feel like the world's just open
and that the world's big
and that God actually does love you and all of that.
When I stepped into those things,
I actually put myself and risked myself
by putting myself out there and saying,
okay, God, I believe you're this good,
so I'm gonna do this.
And God would prove, yeah,
I actually delight in you being that way.
I delight in you doing that.
I delight in whatever.
So he proved to me by my experience
that he really was as good as he said that he was.
But he can tell me he's good all he wants,
but unless I step out and experience it,
I'm not actually believing it.
I have to actually act on it.
Like, okay, I'm here, God, you say it.
So I'm gonna put my money where my mouth is.
I'm gonna put my own skin in the game.
I'm gonna risk it.
And here I am.
You know, I choose to believe,
I believe God truly, not because I want to.
I truly believe God.
I'm choosing that you were this good.
I'm a little scared
because it doesn't seem like that that's true by experience
because I felt like I've been slapped before, et cetera.
But this gets me excited.
And I think that you're telling me
that you were in all of those things
that bring me excitement.
So here I am,
and I'm actually making the exciting thing
happen in my life.
So, and then you see how God responds to you
because the whole point isn't you living life different.
The whole point is what you are experiencing
about God himself.
How will you stepping out and doing these things
and choosing these dreams
and choosing to believe that life is big
and that the things within you that you want to do are good
and that he delights in you when you're doing them.
Then that is, if you're choosing them
because your higher value is not to live life how you want,
but rather you're choosing that,
no God, I'm choosing this because I believe you are so good
that you like when I feel this way.
You like this thing that makes me feel.
really good. That makes me feel light up inside and I'm going to step out in it.
And I choose that you, that, that, that you're, um,
that that's an expression of what it is that you delight in. Um, and,
and that is what made me feel safe with God. And I did that.
And I'm not saying that this is going to take you that long, because remember,
I didn't have anybody to teach me these things.
And so therefore I just kind of had to, I had to figure it out. I was like,
you know, what's going on. So for me, it took,
uh, I don't know. I did this for about 10 months before I made that quote,
unquote, like ultimate choice and whatever.
But remember that the point at which I made that ultimate choice,
I was so many challenging things had happened.
I'd had so much victory. Oh my word. I was on cloud nine. I thought, Oh my word,
I'm having so much fun in life. This is so great.
But then some things started happening and, um, like, uh, and, uh,
uh, and then I began to challenge beliefs that I had
about how much God wanted to take care of me. I was like, well, you know,
I don't think he wants to take care of me that much.
I also don't think he's safe that much. And so God's like, okay,
then now we're going to deal with that.
But the thing that got me to that place was the 10 months of,
of stepping out and what it is that I wanted and choosing that if I couldn't
hear God's good God's direction to do something exciting and good,
I couldn't hear like good, nice, fun,
beautiful life giving instructions from him.
I was just kind of like shut off. I couldn't hear it. And I'm like, okay, well,
if I'm trying to hear God, where else might he show up?
And then he says that I am good. And that, um, uh,
and so that he created me as a beautiful thing with beautiful desires.
And so I'm going to act on those and choose that those are his words,
that those are his direction, that that's his like, I don't know,
instruction or invitation or whatever. And, um,
so I chose all of those exciting things like, Oh my word, God,
you created something like that as a possibility.
I think that that's really cool. And I think you made a really good,
that you, uh, created a really good thing there.
And so I fully appreciate it. And so I'm going to experience it.
I mean, experience the cool thing that X that you designed,
because you thought it was a good idea.
So I'm going to show my appreciation for it and get involved in that thing.
Like I wanted to move to London, which I ended up not because God, um,
actually,
I feel like the life that I've lived since then has been better than if I had
moved to London. I began to travel all over the United States,
including multiple countries, um, in, um, uh,
last year around the world. And I look back on it. Oh my word.
So much more fun than living in London at the time.
That was the height of my dream. I want to be able to live in London,
but that's, that was the limit of what it is that I felt I could experience.
That was the most, which I could dream.
And it felt like a huge dream that I was like throwing at God and saying, Hey,
by the way, this is what I'm going to do. And I'm not asking for permission.
I'm just telling you, you know, that, Hey, this is, this is what I think,
you know, you, you put in me, that's good. Um,
so I really recommend doing that.
And I don't think it's going to take you 10 minutes or anything. I'm just,
it took me 10 minutes. Cause I didn't know where I was going.
All I knew was what wasn't working. So I was just trying something new.
And so it took,
and God took me on this long journey of figuring out where on earth I was going.
And finally, you know, a year later, he said, by the way, it's rest, by the way,
that's what this all means. And this is,
this is what you've been doing and this is how you've been shifting into rest.
But you didn't know it. So this is how you've been doing it.
Now that I'm giving you the words for what you've lived and what you've been
doing now, go show other people how they can live like that.
So a lot of what I'm teaching people of like how to, how to, um,
shift into rest is what I, um,
that learned and experienced during that time where I was just so open and
before I even made that ultimate choice,
it was just like,
I'm choosing to believe that God is so good that he
made me good, you know, and that the things I want are good. And, uh, I w I,
even did it to such an extent that I thought, okay, you know, if before,
maybe I wouldn't allow myself to watch Netflix,
but I just felt like watching a movie right now.
And before maybe I would have thought it was lazy to do it at such and such a
time or whatever. And I just,
and what I would do in order to, to prove to my,
in order to step out in faith, that God is who he says that he is,
that it has got good, that he is that good. I'm like, okay,
this is what I want to do.
And so I am going to do it and experientially put myself
in the place to prove to myself how God responds to me.
when I act on what I want.
And that's a bit of an extreme example,
but it's not an extreme example,
but what I mean is like,
it's like something daily that we could think of
as like lazy or whatever.
But I thought I had to be very radical with myself
and the choices that I made,
because my unbelief was so entrenched in me
that I had to do some very drastic things
in order to break my belief of God from that mindset.
And so anyway.
So was it, I mean, when you say the Netflix things,
is it basically like,
so in your mind that would be a negative thing,
but you're like, well, God's that good.
I should be able to experience him in that too.
Is that what you're trying to say?
It means that I can do it.
And while I'm doing it, God, isn't thinking badly about me.
He's delighting in the fact that I am delighting
in something in an experience that he created.
Because God is the one who created the possibility
of something like Netflix or the experience of the fact
that I could sit in my living room
and watch entertainment that's on a flat screen.
And I find that fun.
I find that enjoyable.
And so I desire to give myself that experience tonight
and make myself popcorn and da, da, da,
as opposed to reading, spending time with God,
do all of these things.
This is what I want to do.
So I am doing this not to let myself
do something I want to do.
I am doing this to prove to myself,
to choose something I want to do
and choosing that me doing this is that God is delighting
in me basically to prove to myself
that I'm doing something that God had said.
God said, Ashley, I'm that good.
Ashley, I love you.
And I enjoy the fact that you find this thing
that I could, this experience that I created
as a possibility.
I enjoy the fact that you appreciate it.
And I'm appreciating the fact that you're enjoying it.
Basically I use those experiences to prove to myself
that by putting my, by thinking, okay,
if God, if I really do believe that God is,
if God is as good as he says that he is, how would I act?
And so I began to put myself in those situations.
And so anyway, in order to, like I said,
put myself in a situation where I experienced the fact
that he was delighting in me while I was doing it
as opposed to thinking badly about me.
So I couldn't think badly about me.
I had to love and accept me while I was there
and then just enjoy the fact that he was enjoying me
doing the thing,
that he was enjoying the fact that I was enjoying it.
That's why I would do those things.
It wasn't like, oh, I'm gonna, if God's good,
if God's this good, he'll let me get away with this.
That's not the exercise.
It was, no, I am choosing to do something I want
because I am putting myself in a situation, Lord,
where I will experience the fact that you are,
that you delight in me no matter what I'm doing.
So I'll put myself in a situation where normally
I'd feel bad about what I was doing.
Yeah, I get it.
Yeah, it's that kind of a thing.
So, but yeah, hopefully that live that I did
will be a couple of hours ago will be helpful.
But anyway, but it's along those lines.
So before we go, did you have any other questions or?
No, no, I love that I need to start exploring
and be curious and not just sit on the couch
waiting for an experience.
So yeah, no, I needed all of this.
I appreciate it, yeah.
Good.
I have, I've been feeling that whenever I see you,
this is always what I think.
I feel, and it's took me a while to figure out what it was.
What I picture is that you are,
as if you're in a straight jacket.
That's how I always see you when I see you.
But here's why.
It's because you're restraining you.
It's not because, so in other words,
you have permission by God to do the things
that you want to do,
to love what it is that you want to love,
to love what's coming out of you, to be.
And so I don't say that to discourage you.
I say that to encourage that the restrictions
that you're putting on yourself,
you no longer have to put on yourself.
now can live unrestrained and, but that can feel very unsafe because restrain.
If you grew up like me, restrain is your safety and restrain is where you were
called what I thought in my mind that I was called by God and other people.
Good.
If I restrained, I got, I felt safe, but so it can feel very unsafe to be
exposed, come very unsafe to no longer be this small.
So anyway, I just say that as an encouragement of it.
So when you said, when you wrote that post of, um, you know, I finding it
harder to choose myself than to choose God, I'm like, exactly, I was like,
that's exactly what I've been picturing is like this, this self restraining.
And, um, anyway, so I, so that's why I've just been feeling so
very strongly.
Okay.
She doesn't need to, it's not God.
She's needing to choose right now.
She's needing to choose that, that, um, that she is good.
She's needing to see and love and fully accept herself, allow
herself to experience herself.
Stop avoiding herself, stop avoiding, you know, what it is that she's feeling
or that she shouldn't feel that way.
Or I don't care if it's anger, I don't care if it's fear.
I don't care like fully, fully accept your.
Whatever feelings come up, whatever beliefs come up, because
you're not your feelings.
You're not your beliefs.
So your feelings are telling you what it is.
You believe you aren't even your beliefs.
So you cannot believe God, or you could believe God.
That is not who you are.
That's just what you're believing because who you are is your spirit and your
spirit always believes your father and all of that stuff.
So in other words, you're already there.
There's no, there's no potential destruction that you need to
be restraining yourself from.
Like you can't, you're, you are, um, you are a vessel and a spirit that is meant
to bring powerfully, bring love and healing and joy.
You're not something that you need to be protected from and that you
need to protect other people from.
So you just, so I just encourage and invite you to open and it can feel scary.
I feel very, very scary, but choose yourself, choose yourself first.
And by that, I mean, accept yourself fully and completely, regardless of
anything negative that comes up, anything ugly, anything you don't like.
You know, anything that you're afraid.
God's not going to like God is big enough to handle the tantrums.
He's big enough to handle the, whatever he needs you to accept you fully with
the tantrums, with the fear, with the negative emotions and all of that.
He's not afraid of it.
He, regardless of whether you're expressing it, it's in there anyway.
And he's just like, he's just like, you're fine.
You're fine with me.
So let it all out, face who it is that you are, and then, and then love
yourself completely, because it's only when you love yourself
completely, that it'll go away.
The fear will go away.
The anger, all those things that you quote, that you quote, unquote, you
know, don't like about yourself, even though remember, we just talked, said
the fact that it's not you, but that's how we talk is, oh, I don't like this
about myself, about your soul or about your body, they will, they're staying
there because they think that they're needed in order to protect you.
So if you fully, because they feel like your spirit is, and this is what I
explained in the video, you're, they feel that, that your spirit is something
that it's afraid of that, um, uh, that it needs to be afraid of because it
feels it doesn't feel safe with your spirit.
So what your spirit, what I invited people to do in the, in the, um, in the
live is that to present your spirit to your soul and your body and allow your
soul and your body to just be who it is that they are, because the spirit is
telling the soul and body, Hey, look, just like God is for me, I'm going to
provide for I'm your provider.
I'm your protector.
I keep you safe.
I keep you secure all this work that you're doing to protect yourself.
You don't, you weren't meant to have to do all of that.
You were meant to do other things.
You were meant to be free to explore and to simply enjoy who it is that you are.
You weren't meant to have to provide for and protect yourself.
So I will do that for you.
if you'll be safe with me. Well, what the soul and the body are going to do is it's going to push
those. It's going to test those boundaries. It's like, Oh, you say that. How? Yeah. Well,
what about this? And what about this in me? And what about this in me? And all those things are
going to start coming out because like a kid, it's going to start testing the boundaries.
It's like, Oh, I know that that's not true. And I'm going to prove it. I'm going to show
you this about me and I can show you this about me and all that's going to come up.
And it wants to prove to it and your soul, your spirit needs to prove to your soul and your body
that it is undeterred and unthreatened by what comes out of your soul and your body.
I was like, that's fine. It's like, I still love you. I still protect you. I fully accept you.
Never changing. I fully accept you the way that you are. And I do not require you to change.
That's extremely bodily important for your spirit, which is perfect. And who you are
to fully accept all of yourself, but the negative emotions and the unbelief against God and the,
anything else that's in there, all of the trauma, all the wins, whatever, to fully accept who you
are not record and to fully love and to receive yourself without ever requiring yourself to
change. And it's really wild because that is what your soul and your body will need in order to have
in order to prove to themselves. Okay. So you mean it. So I've thrown everything,
including the kitchen sink at you and you're undeterred. You weren't your identity. Your
sense of identity wasn't threatened by all of these negative things that you saw.
You didn't shift into thinking, Oh my word, I really am bad. I I'm, I'm my soul. I am all
these feelings. I am all these unbeliefs. You didn't. And the soul's like, Oh, so I guess that
if I'm throwing everything at you and I couldn't scare you, you must be more powerful than me.
Therefore you really can provide for and protect me. And you provided me a safe place to be an
absolute mess and didn't require me to be any different. You didn't slap me. You didn't judge
me. You didn't tell me I shouldn't be like this and I should be different. And that's very important
to not require of ourselves that we be any different than what we are for that way. That
is the only way that it will finally feel safe enough. That's providing it a safe environment
to accept it fully and never require it to change that it will finally feel safe enough to let it
go, to let go of the fear, to let go of, you know, the, the anger, to let go of the wounds, to let
go of whatever it has to be accepted with them and all of their ugliness in order for it to know
that it's safe enough to let them go. But if it's not safe with our spirit, with all of its
negativeness, you know, with all of the soul and the body and all of its negativeness that our
soul and our body depth feel rejected. And they're like, well, that I'm really not going to leave
them because I'm keeping all of these for myself protection. And if I'm not safe from you or safe
with you, with all these things, I definitely don't trust you without them because there are,
there are shield. So we have to prove that it really is safe enough for them to come out of
hiding for them to finally let all of those things go. So that's what I would recommend for you
is that the life that you are giving yourself to yourself, you know, the experience that you're
giving yourself on my word, I've got to be small. I've got to, I can't do this and I need to make
sure to do this. And, you know, and why can't I have this and I'm in lack and whatever is actually
not what God has given you. And it's not who it is that you are. And you are, you're everything
that you've wanted to be. And you're more than, you know, that you are. So anyway, is that helpful
at all? Yeah, definitely. I'm learning how to accept myself because I was like, how do I do
that? Do I just say affirmations? But I, yeah, no, I understand better now. Yeah. Okay. And then
hopefully, hopefully the live will help, but, and then I would just ask the Lord, Lord, you know,
help, help me to shift into that. I'm also going to be posting, and I mentioned this in the live
and, but it was on my computer, so I need to find it, that I'm going to be posting something that
you can, of how to talk to your spirit, soul, and body. So it can begin to transition
while you're subconscious. I mean, it's subconsciously while you're, while you're
asleep or whatever. And because it can begin to shift without you, just by giving it instruction
without you having to micromanage it and know what it is you're believing and it'll begin to shift.
So it kind of gives you.
bit of an anchor point of how to begin to, to interact with the different, your, the different
dimensions of who you are, you know, spirit, soul, and body. So hopefully that'll be helpful as well.
So, which I need to do right after this class, I need to go find that and post it.
That sounds exciting. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, well, um, it was good to get to visit with you
and you be sure to let me know if you have any, if you have any questions, I'm absolutely insistent
that nobody gets left behind. You know, I want to always check in with everyone, make sure that
they have what it is that they need. So, um, you know, if you're, if you're struggling with
something, if you're wondering, okay, how do I, how do I make progress? Or you're just feeling
discouraged or whatever. Um, I, you know, a lot of that just needs to be processed between you
and the Lord, because being convinced by me, isn't going to fix anything, but at the same time,
you're not alone. So I want people to, um, to feel. Um, that they can, and, uh, to feel that
they can reach out when they're struggling, because that's what the rest intensive is about.
It's about me helping people live it, not helping them learn about it and not helping them learn
about how to shift and arrest, but actually help them live the thing. So, um, so anyway,
so you just let me know. Okay. Good to visit with you, Rita. You too, Ashley.
By the way, this recording will be on your page. So if you scroll all the way to the bottom of
rest intensive members, um, I have to wait for this to download and all of that. I have to wait
for this to download. My computer is telling me it's about to shut down. Uh, but, uh, when I do,
I'll get it uploaded in just FYI, when you click on your, so probably by this, by this evening,
if you go down to the bottom of the rest intensive members page on enter as rest.com,
enter his dot rest, then click on your name and it'll take you to a page that where I'll be
housing all of your, um, transformation session recordings. So this is, this is, it'll be
accessible. So, all right. Well, good to visit with you. Thank you. Bye night.