WEBVTT

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I can't hear you.

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Okay, there you go. Now I can.

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Yeah.

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How are you.

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Okay, just took a shower so I'm kind of,

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you know, feeling better.

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You're feeling but oh yeah we all feel better after a shower.

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You look good.

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Oh, well sorry I'm just a couple minutes late I just got off of another transformation session so I had to hit it in that one and start this really fast so and there's always like a little bit of a lack.

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Yeah, no problem. I know you're really busy.

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I don't know how well I'm fine.

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Well, you know, I just, you just learn to do it more and more and rest.

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So I enjoy it, it brings me a tremendous amount of life, and I'm very I always tell Lord Lord I'm so grateful I get to do what it is that I that I do, because I've, I've, I've done other things that I did not enjoy what I was doing, and I thought

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you know life was meant for something different than, than not living like you were then feeling like you weren't living to your fullest. And what weren't doing what you're in aren't doing what you were meant to do.

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And so anyway, I just asked Lord Lord that's my heart's desire is to do what I was what I was meant to do you know it brings me life and so eventually it morphed into this, and I've loved it.

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So anyway, yeah, I can imagine.

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So, um, how are you doing, what, what is it that you would like to listen to your heart these days you know what would you like to talk about.

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Well,

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I told you about last week.

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Yes, and Friday happened. I heard after that. Yeah.

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And I was really upset on Friday, you know, and the medical assistant that,

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you know, she took me into the room and then I don't know if I said it or she realized that I didn't have an authorization that was approved.

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So,

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you know, it was.

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Hang on just a second. I've got to close this because I just hang on just a minute.

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Just a second.

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Okay, that's

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the doctor that's kind of head over us wanted a quick huddle but fortunately, it's later in the afternoon.

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So I turned this stuff completely.

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Okay, so the ma.

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She said well, we may not be able to see you. And I said, you know, I raised my voice I said this is a delay in care.

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And, you know, I was just so upset by then.

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And, you know, a little bit later I apologize to her and I said it wasn't about you was just, you know, so frustrated with this whole thing.

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And, and not that I really wanted the radiation therapy anyway, but, you know, yeah. And then when they said, Well, you don't really need an authorization.

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They came back with that.

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That ma said to me.

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Well, we could have just sent you home.

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And, you know, that was just uncalled for. But anyway,

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I saw the doctor, and then they have to do this mapping thing because you have to be lined up and you have to be in the same position.

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Each time you go.

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So, I had four tattoos.

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Like, here, where were they down here and on either side here.

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And they to line everything up.

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But I just started I do not want tattoos, it hurt.

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So, really. Okay.

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Okay.

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What they did.

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I mean, it was tattoos, you know, like they'll stay, but

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they're dots, just dots. And, and just a dot hurt. And I

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thought getting a full tat, because I've always wanted to

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get a tattoo. But then I thought, really? Yes. But then I

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thought after that, no, I don't want to tattoo that was painful.

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But anyway, that's what I heard. The doctor and the radiation

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tech. They were so nice. You know, they read Yeah, after all

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that, they were just so nice. And then there was a nurse that

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talked to me too. And she said, I know you're, you've been

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upset. Do you want to talk to a social worker? And I said, No,

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didn't have time to do that. And I don't I mean, I don't think a

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social worker would help anyway. But it was just and I, you know,

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I was kind of like, where is I don't know. I mean, it wasn't

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that God did all that. But it's just, you know, like you said

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last night, he doesn't cause all that to happen. But I was just

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and I felt bad that I raised my voice. But you know, it was just

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so frustrating. Yeah. And, and so you're rising up and, and

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then creating a particular response. Yeah. And then

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so I start the radiation therapy in two weeks from today. And

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I'm after I had in my little thing that I wrote, I had buyers

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remorse until last night, you know, like, well, I don't really

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want to do this. And I haven't told my sister yet that I'm

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doing it because she's so anti anti vaccination. And I very

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yeah, I can watch it. But it's the action itself. It's the bad

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thing. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, it I don't see anything.

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I mean, I think I mean, and I had checked with a nutritional,

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not nature pathic doctor, and they were recommending radiation

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therapy. So that's what kind of got me to go ahead with it. But

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last night, you know, and I wrote, I took down notes,

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because I thought it was really good what you were saying about

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making a decision, when you're talking to Casey about whether

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this, you know, choose, you know, alternative ways of

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treatment. And, you know, the whole thing of, and I didn't

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really ask the Lord, well, what do you want me to do? I mean,

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it was, it's kind of like, I just figure he's with me. And

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he's giving me wisdom as I go through things. I mean,

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sometimes I specifically ask him. But I mean, I probably

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should have said what tool do you want me to use, but it

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became clear, you know, and after talking with the doctor,

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too, because she said, you could not do it and just do the

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hormone therapy, pills, you know, for five years, which I'll

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do any with it. Or, and they also have this other choice that

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you can do it for five days instead of for three weeks. So

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it gives you a stronger dose. Yeah. But there's more, she said

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there could be more scarring. And she would go with the three

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weeks. So I said, I'll do the three weeks. So

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it's good to have that.

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What's that?

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It's good to have that direction in that kind of like wisdom

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where they'll say or wisdom that I don't know if that's a proper

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way to use that. But basically, back to where they all they'll

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give you the pros and cons, then they tell you what they would

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do. They're like, well, based on all this, you know, if you weigh

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everything in the balance, it's really nice to have a doctor

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they'll say really, you know, would do this, you know, that's

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nice.

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Yeah, it was. So she kind of sold me on it. And first, I

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wanted to do the five days. But she said, there's only data for

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five years that it's held, you know, so they don't have 10 2030

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years like they have with the three week thing. So I figured

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I'd go with that. I think it's a good idea. So I'm not, you know,

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I'm not in turmoil, like I was, I was really Sunday. It's

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really

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Yeah, I mean, it's hard enough, you know, when you go through a

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cancer diagnosis without, you know, all the other the

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healthcare stuff.

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Yeah, that's what I've always thought. Yeah, just hearing

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people talk. I'm like, Oh,

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yeah, and I lost my PCP that I'd had, you know, I've been with

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this one medical group for over 12 years. And so because my

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health plan didn't renew the contract, I had to change

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primary care doctors.

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And so that was, that was a bit of a, yeah,

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you know, that, and I think I, I may go back, you know, our

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insurance, I mean, things changed the beginning of the

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year. And so I may get a different like a, you know, do

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you know, PPO?

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Um, yeah, I used to, I don't remember what it stands for now.

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But I used to know.

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Yeah, I like right now I have HMO health maintenance. Okay.

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And, oh, yeah, then PPO is more restrictive, but it also, and

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it's more expensive, but it's also better or something pays

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more lower deductible or something. Okay.

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Yeah, you have you have to pay more, but you can go anywhere.

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Okay, that's what that is. I was like, I knew that there was

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some benefit to it. But that was more expensive. Okay. Yeah,

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yeah. It's been a while.

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Yeah. So I could go, you know, back to my other doctors. And I

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don't know, I'm going to see how this turns out. Because I'll be

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done probably by the end of November. Yeah, yeah. I'll be

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with the treatment. So I was kind of glad that while doing

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this intensive, I won't, I will have just started the radiation

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therapy. But I didn't want to be doing this, this at the same

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time, because you get tired.

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Yeah, that's what I've heard. Yeah.

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Yeah. So anyway, that's, that's stuff has been weighing on me.

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And I've got to tell my sister, I decided to do it. Like with

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your vaccination people, you know, your Yeah, I mean,

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there's and I mean, my sister is so I mean, she even had a card

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that she took when kids were getting vaccinated. And, you

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know, do not vaccinate your toddler, whatever the sign said,

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and she talked to me, you know, she's rather an activist. I was

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gonna say it's an activist. Yes, yeah. I know. So I I'm not

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looking forward to telling her. Yeah, I'm sorry. Yeah. But

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anyway, that's kind of what's going on. And work is very, very

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busy right now. And I think I might have told you that we were

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about two years ago, we were bought out by a company. And it

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was a merger, but they said things wouldn't change for about

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two years. Well, now they have started changing big time. And

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it's people, some people are leaving and have left. Some

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they let go. And then yeah, we have I work with the nurse care

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care managers, and they are not happy with what Yeah, there's

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just not. So anyway, I don't know what I'm saying. But

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that's just kind of where I'm at what's going on. And as far as I

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mean, I you know, when the when I first had the cancer

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diagnosis, I was I was really at peace, you know, I knew God was

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going to take care of me through it. And, and then when

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things you know, like I missed my first surgery date, and then

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all this, you know, with the medical group change, and the,

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you know, all this stuff just has kind of, you know, taken me

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off. off track. I don't know. And, you know, I'm

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looking at my notes over here, but, you know, it was really it

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was good last night. It just kind of

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calmed me down. You know that.

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And I think I was, I mean, I felt bad that I had raised my

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voice. But in a way, I don't, I don't think it was wrong. You

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know that to get frustrated and

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yeah, I don't I mean,

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it was, I just couldn't believe it, you know, that after all

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this, now they're going to tell me to go home and resettle.

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So yeah.

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Anyway, and I have, I got an email today. I mean, this, this

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part is really exciting. I got an email today from my pastor

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pastor friend in India. And he is having me well, there's two

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Bible schools, one, I've spoken to the students before, like in

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April. And then I think, I think it's I speak to Oh, no, that's

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that's the longer class. So for Christmas, I have a 20 minute

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message to give on. I think it's December 7, or something like

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that. And then there's a Bible school that's to a Bible school

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in India. And then there's a Bible school in Sri Lanka, that

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I'll be speaking to those students for four weeks, an hour

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and a half each time, but it's with translation. So yeah, that

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cuts it down. Well, about 45 minutes, I would think, you

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know,

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yeah, because it's always half. Yeah.

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Yeah, for the translation. So I'm quite excited about those

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opportunities.

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That's very exciting.

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I mean, it's remind me how long you were in Japan. Was it 11

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years? 17? Oh, 17. Yeah. So I think they're especially

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wanting, I mean, when they had me speak before, I talked about

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the heart of missions, which is Jesus. And, and so we're going

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to talk about the topic. And I think they're, some of the

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students are already pastors and missionaries. So and some are,

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are just, you know, in training. So it's such a great opportunity.

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Yeah, to talk to these. I know these leaders. And, you know,

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and I when I did it before, you know, very aware that I need

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that, I'm doing it with God, you know, that it's not, you know,

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that sort of thing. But that's exciting. You know, that's

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very exciting. Yeah, now, the one in Sri Lanka, are they

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connected with the Bible school you're talking to here?

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In India, the one's in Bangalore, India, and the others

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are in Sri Lanka. Okay. So I talked, I spoke at the one I

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thought there was one local as well. Okay, nevermind. They're

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both overseas. Yeah. So they are connected somehow. Okay. Yeah,

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I'm like, or something. Okay. Yeah, they are connected. I

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mean, the leaders like the leader of the one in Bangalore,

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he just went to Sri Lanka. And so when I Oh, we're getting on a

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zoom call on Thursday, like the, the leader of the Bible school

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in both places, the one in Sri Lanka, and the one Bangalore,

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and then my pastor friend. Okay, cool. Great. Yeah. So yeah, I

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mean, it's amazing that I got to know this Indian pastor

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anyway, in a small group. And yeah. So it's just quite

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amazing. But

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that's wonderful. What a neat opportunity.

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I know. And, you know, missions and, you know, intimacy with God

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has always been my thing, not just for like, Americans to

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experience God, but, you know, overseas.

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Yeah, that's great.

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Yeah.

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Especially because so much of, unfortunately, not, not all, but so much of, um, of the

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faith, Christian faith that spread to other parts of the world, I don't think I'm

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sitting up high enough, so my brain's not getting all the blood it needs for me to

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stop yawning, um, but, um, a lot of Christian, a lot of Christianity, even in

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like say Brit, uh, India or Sri Lanka or whatever is very heavily Western influenced.

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So if the Western church needs it, it's very likely that, um, other places needed

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as well, simply because that they've been so heavily influenced by the Western view

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of things of a lack of connection and heartfelt connections sometimes with

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Jesus, et cetera.

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Now that's not obviously everyone.

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It's just, uh, it's, it really has amazed me.

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Like for instance, in Turkey, so much of the church was very heavily

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American Western influenced.

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And, um, and so there were a lot of things that the Americans had to unlearn in order

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to properly teach the church, the difference between Christianity versus

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their own Western culture.

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Anyway, and then like keeping us like separate from Jesus and not, you know,

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connecting this hard and all of the great things you're going to be talking about.

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So, yeah, well, I'm excited for you.

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That is great.

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Yeah, it is.

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So I don't know that I have any specific questions.

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Um, I mean, I, I think it's, you know, just the whole, the whole thing of taking

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the time to sit in his presence and, you know, sense his love and, uh, which we

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don't have to always set aside time to do.

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I do that to kind of like give someone say, for instance, an anchor point of

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like shut all of the other distractions out, focus on it and gain some kind of an

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understanding of connecting with the Lord and experiencing connecting with the Lord.

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But then we're supposed to just live like that all of the time is in, as you're

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doing the dishes, as you're working, as you're trying to problem solve, as you're

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in a meeting, as you're making the bed, as you're walking down the hall, you know,

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the bathroom, whatever it is that you're doing everything with the Lord and that

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he's always looking on you in that moment, delighting in you, you are currently being

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delighted in you're currently being loved and enjoyed God's not just there for you

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to access whenever you need him.

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And he's not looking at you, always expecting something from you.

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Like, Hey, look, I want you to do this.

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I want you to accomplish this.

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I want you to do it, right?

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I want you to whatever it's like you it's shifting ourself to now living with God,

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where we're always developing that relationship with him by choosing the fact

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that he says we're unified with him.

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Not therefore there's nothing left to do.

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And that's shifting into rest.

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Isn't, isn't shifting into union with him.

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We're already there.

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In fact, shifting into rest is just a way to help us under is help us understand

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that kind of like help us understand the, the idea of it, but really we're not

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shifting anywhere we're already there.

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We're just kind of like making ourselves aware that we're there.

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So that's what I, that's what I mean.

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It's choosing and it kind of like, and then sometimes by, by in choosing, we

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have to make ourselves aware of that until we don't have to be aware of it

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because we're subconsciously making the choice anyway, we're, but anyway, the

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thing is that making ourselves aware of that, okay, I am being loved at this

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moment, I'm being delighted in, I don't need to be doing anything.

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I don't need to be about to be doing anything.

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I don't have to be making a choice for God.

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I don't have to be believing something about him.

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I'm just enough.

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I'm enough right now.

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I'm not enough because of what, the way I make decisions about the kind of

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decision that I'm going to make, or, you know, or the way I'm living life or the

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fact that I, you know, you've got this opportunity or the fact that you've had

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the past that you've had, you know, and being a missionary to Japan or whatever

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else, none of those things, um, are giving you brownie points with the Lord

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of making you more loved or.

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more in union with him or have him be more delighted in you, his delight in you is connected

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to the, is based in who he is and you were born.

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In other words, you were created in the spirit out of God, of, um, who God is, what he loves,

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what he delights in, and the fact that he loves you were literally born from the fact

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that God loves and the fact that God is love in his love created you and it's because his

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love is going to be expressed in something that he loves and delights in.

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And so to just always, and that's what I was just talking to somebody else about as well,

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is that, uh, cause they were asking, so what do you do when, what do you do in the good

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times?

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What do you do when everything's nice?

305
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You know, as opposed to, you know, just, Oh, well, I'm going through a bad, a bad time.

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You know, we've been talking a lot about that, you know, all in the group of like, well,

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what do you do in the painful moments?

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What do you do in this struggle?

309
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What did you do?

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Well, they were asking, well, what do you do in the other times?

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You know, I said the same thing, you, you, you shift yourself now to choosing this lifestyle,

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not like getting a tool of like, okay, like now when I'm going through something painful,

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now I can use this thing called shifting into rest and allow me to that, you know,

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that is that it's a lifestyle that we're choosing, that we operate in, whether or not we're going

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through something painful.

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It could be when we're going through, you know, something positive, Oh, excuse me.

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Thank you.

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Um, and, uh, where we're choosing that now we're, we're letting go of this life in this

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lifestyle being such a priority.

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And we're choosing instead to make our priority, our development of our relationship with God,

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not because we have to, but because that's who we are.

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We are a son.

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We're in him.

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We're unified.

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We're born of his love.

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It just, it's, it, if we stop being all of the things that aren't natural to us and we,

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and we let go of all this unbelief, we just naturally become who it is that we already

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are.

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And so, and to focus on the fact that, okay, how do I, how do I position myself in experience?

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Cause you're already there.

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How do I position myself in experience in that place where God says that I am loved

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and unified.

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I make, I make that choice.

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I remind myself for a while until I no longer have to remind myself because I just, it's,

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it's been, I've, I've reminded myself to the point that I've chosen it enough that now

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I just, I've made the decision.

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And now I just live in the fact that I'm loved and I'm unified with them.

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And I'm not even aware of the fact that I'm having to remind myself that God loves me

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and what I'm doing and that I'm unified with them.

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I've made that choice.

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So many times I've just shifted myself into that position where I live from that place

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without being consciously aware of having to remind myself to do it because I just kind

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of like, I stopped, I stopped leaving that place and I just remained there without having

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to remind myself that I'm there.

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And, but one of the things that you can do to, to, to start living like that and to start

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stepping into that lifestyle, to start making it the lifestyle is in the normal everyday

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things to choose that you're existing in what God says that you are and where God says good,

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where God says that you are, that you are being loved right now.

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Like right in this moment, you are being loved by God.

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You are being loved on by God.

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He's watching you, looking at you, delighting in you.

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Is that you're believing to him, to the degree that you are and not condemning you for the

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degree to which you're not having faith right now, he's just like, Oh, that's where it just

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where she is.

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You know, when someone's for instance, if someone's five years old, it's okay for them

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to be fine.

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I don't expect them to be six and the same thing for 15 or 15 years old in the spirit.

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It's okay for us to be 15.

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God doesn't expect us to be 16.

360
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We're not 16 yet.

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You know, every phase, it's okay for you to be where it is that you are.

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And each phase is good.

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It's not bad because you should be somewhere else.

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Well, you know, at 15 year old, we don't get onto a 15 year old and say, well, you should

365
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be 35.

366
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Now you should be out on your own and you should be doing this.

367
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No, they shouldn't.

368
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There's nothing wrong with where it is that they are.

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And that's one of the things that we have to keep doing is releasing ourself from these

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shoulds.

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I shouldn't be this, I should be this, you know, et cetera.

372
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Anyway, does that help?

373
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:13.800
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that does. And I mean, sometimes, you know, like, maybe I, I, I,

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you know, shame comes up for some reason. And then that throws me into turmoil. But

375
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I mean, a lot of that, and, you know, just realize, no, God still loves me, you know,

376
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right now. And, and that I think is, you know, I don't have to take on the shame or the condemnation.

377
00:30:38.260 --> 00:30:48.100
Yeah, yeah, it's because there's nothing in you to be to carry the shame or the condemnation.

378
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There's no, there's no anchor point for it to, for it to claim any kind of, there's nothing,

379
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no anchor point in you that it can, that causes it to be able to claim right to you. You know,

380
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like, oh, we have right to her because, you know, she deserves shame because that she

381
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deserves condemnation because of this. No, there's no, there's no this, there's no, there's

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no thing for it to latch on to. And so that's why we can let it go is because the only way

383
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that it's staying there is we're holding on to it. It doesn't force itself on to us. We're

384
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holding on to it. We just need to let it go. We're like, Nope, God says that that's not

385
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a part of me that it's not something that I need to pay attention to. I can release

386
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that shame and that condemnation. So God doesn't love us despite it. You know, despite the

387
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fact that we're doing all this stuff, God loves our spirit. God loves us and connects

388
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with us and unifies with us in spirit. And that's perfect. It's just simply that an aspect

389
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of us, which is our soul and our body, it's just not come into agreement yet, but our

390
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soul and our body do not condemn us. They used to, but no longer because of what Christ

391
00:32:02.920 --> 00:32:08.280
did, because of what Christ did, your soul, what you do now in your soul and your body

392
00:32:08.280 --> 00:32:13.840
can no longer condemn you to God. So sure. We still do those things. We still are in

393
00:32:13.840 --> 00:32:20.920
unbelief, you know, we're still whatever, but it can no longer condemn you to God. Yeah.

394
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So, and we're still, that's why Paul had to say, why do you still act like the old man?

395
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Like you deserve shame and condemnations. Like you don't, not anymore. That's not part

396
00:32:31.400 --> 00:32:36.840
of it. There's no place in you and who it is that you are for that to, to, for that

397
00:32:36.840 --> 00:32:45.800
to have any like hold or, or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. And we

398
00:32:45.800 --> 00:32:51.080
have to choose that it's true because it feels drastic. It doesn't feel logical. We're so

399
00:32:51.080 --> 00:32:59.960
you, we're in so much of a habit of feeling bad when we do stuff and we need to stop that

400
00:32:59.960 --> 00:33:05.720
shame and that, that condemnation. Yeah. Yeah. We need to stop being in unbelief against

401
00:33:05.720 --> 00:33:09.640
the Lord and we need to stop doing the actions that result from the unbelief, you know, et

402
00:33:09.640 --> 00:33:15.080
cetera, et cetera. But I'm talking about the, I'm not talking about like the holy spirit,

403
00:33:15.080 --> 00:33:19.960
you know, confronting us about something. Yeah. Holy spirit when it confronts us about

404
00:33:19.960 --> 00:33:30.520
something is, is not heavy. It's just prompting. It's like, Oh, I opened and kind of like,

405
00:33:30.520 --> 00:33:34.960
Oh, okay. Apparently that wasn't wise. That wasn't reflective of the character of God.

406
00:33:34.960 --> 00:33:40.520
I shouldn't, I, you know, so therefore that's not at me. So I need to not do that again.

407
00:33:40.520 --> 00:33:47.560
You know, that's, that's not accurately reflecting who God and I are, but that's different. That

408
00:33:47.560 --> 00:33:54.960
prompting is different than feeling bad that when we've done something, feeling bad and

409
00:33:54.960 --> 00:34:00.360
feeling heavy, feeling oppressed, feeling shamed, feeling condemned, feeling, like I

410
00:34:00.360 --> 00:34:07.480
said, just feeling bad because bad is, is us identifying with it. It meaning like, that's

411
00:34:07.480 --> 00:34:12.440
why we say the word bad is they're saying, Oh, that's bad that I did it. In other words,

412
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we're, we're, we're associating ourselves and who it is that we are with the thing that we

413
00:34:19.880 --> 00:34:27.239
did. And just because we did something, doesn't make that us. It's just a choice that we made

414
00:34:27.239 --> 00:34:33.000
based off of a belief, but it's not who we are. And it actually doesn't change or affect who it

415
00:34:33.000 --> 00:34:39.320
is that we are. And God loves who we are. He doesn't love us because of what we do. So therefore

416
00:34:39.320 --> 00:34:44.199
he doesn't stop loving us because of what we do, because it doesn't bear any weight in the

417
00:34:44.199 --> 00:34:49.639
conversation. It's just who it is that we are and what we do can't affect who we are.

418
00:34:49.639 --> 00:34:59.720
Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah. That is very freeing that that is real freedom. Isn't it?

419
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:01.000
Yeah.

420
00:35:01.000 --> 00:35:02.000
Yeah.

421
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:03.000
Yeah.

422
00:35:03.000 --> 00:35:04.000
Yeah.

423
00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:05.000
Yeah.

424
00:35:05.000 --> 00:35:06.000
Yeah.

425
00:35:06.000 --> 00:35:07.000
Yeah.

426
00:35:07.000 --> 00:35:08.000
Yeah.

427
00:35:08.000 --> 00:35:09.000
Yeah.

428
00:35:09.000 --> 00:35:11.000
Yeah.

429
00:35:11.000 --> 00:35:12.000
Yeah.

430
00:35:12.000 --> 00:35:15.000
Well, everyone apparently seems to be doing really good today.

431
00:35:15.000 --> 00:35:16.000
I know that there's no.

432
00:35:16.000 --> 00:35:21.000
A lot of questions.

433
00:35:21.000 --> 00:35:22.000
I mean,

434
00:35:22.000 --> 00:35:25.000
I know that everybody just had all of these questions and all of that,

435
00:35:25.000 --> 00:35:26.000
but.

436
00:35:26.000 --> 00:35:31.000
I just, I just.

437
00:35:31.000 --> 00:35:33.000
I just want to say that that last night was helpful.

438
00:35:33.000 --> 00:35:36.000
And I was like, well, I'm glad.

439
00:35:36.000 --> 00:35:38.000
You know, so I think that hopefully it just kind of like helps.

440
00:35:38.000 --> 00:35:40.000
A lot of people just kind of like.

441
00:35:40.000 --> 00:35:50.000
Kind of address some things that there were some questions on.

442
00:35:50.000 --> 00:35:51.000
That.

443
00:35:51.000 --> 00:35:54.000
So it's so interesting to go from last week and the struggle that we

444
00:35:54.000 --> 00:35:55.000
went through.

445
00:35:55.000 --> 00:35:57.000
To this.

446
00:35:57.000 --> 00:35:59.000
From like hours ago.

447
00:35:59.000 --> 00:36:00.000
Yeah.

448
00:36:00.000 --> 00:36:02.000
Yeah.

449
00:36:02.000 --> 00:36:03.000
Which is good.

450
00:36:03.000 --> 00:36:04.000
Which is great.

451
00:36:04.000 --> 00:36:05.000
That.

452
00:36:05.000 --> 00:36:07.000
Let's see if there is.

453
00:36:07.000 --> 00:36:12.000
Anything else.

454
00:36:12.000 --> 00:36:17.000
See.

455
00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:23.000
One of the things, if it's helpful.

456
00:36:24.000 --> 00:36:30.000
Is that we're not afraid.

457
00:36:30.000 --> 00:36:32.000
Like say for instance, when you got the diagnosis,

458
00:36:32.000 --> 00:36:34.000
but then when all of these things started happening,

459
00:36:34.000 --> 00:36:36.000
All of this fear starts coming up.

460
00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:45.000
You know, it's like, what on earth is that?

461
00:36:45.000 --> 00:36:46.000
Well, it,

462
00:36:46.000 --> 00:36:51.000
it indicates to us ways in which we are relying on

463
00:36:51.000 --> 00:36:52.000
the process.

464
00:36:52.000 --> 00:36:55.000
As opposed to God,

465
00:36:55.000 --> 00:37:00.000
being able to God superseding and having the process and being doing

466
00:37:00.000 --> 00:37:02.000
something in the meantime. So for instance,

467
00:37:02.000 --> 00:37:06.000
what I thought was very fascinating is when you said.

468
00:37:06.000 --> 00:37:09.000
That you were talking to the, to the lady.

469
00:37:09.000 --> 00:37:12.000
And she said that there's no author is that, you know, you.

470
00:37:12.000 --> 00:37:14.000
You know, she notified you that there,

471
00:37:14.000 --> 00:37:17.000
that the form wasn't authorized or you not received any authorization

472
00:37:17.000 --> 00:37:20.000
and that that was an issue.

473
00:37:20.000 --> 00:37:23.000
And then, and then eventually it was found out that no,

474
00:37:23.000 --> 00:37:26.000
actually that's not an issue. And I was like, Oh,

475
00:37:26.000 --> 00:37:29.000
isn't that neat with the Lord did he went in there and you just kind

476
00:37:29.000 --> 00:37:31.000
of like removed it and it's all fine.

477
00:37:31.000 --> 00:37:34.000
And he let them know while you were still there and he had to stay

478
00:37:34.000 --> 00:37:37.000
there in order for them to find it. When that lady said, well,

479
00:37:37.000 --> 00:37:38.000
we could have just sent you home. You know,

480
00:37:38.000 --> 00:37:40.000
He'd like orchestrated everything.

481
00:37:40.000 --> 00:37:42.000
Like it's all, it's all just fine.

482
00:37:42.000 --> 00:37:46.000
That's one of the things that I have learned is when I'm in the

483
00:37:47.000 --> 00:37:50.000
middle of a situation and people start people or a situation start,

484
00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:54.000
it feels like it's thwarting the process.

485
00:37:54.000 --> 00:37:56.000
Like, okay, everything's going smoothly.

486
00:37:56.000 --> 00:37:59.000
And then someone throws in a kink. Okay, people.

487
00:37:59.000 --> 00:38:02.000
I'm trusting God here.

488
00:38:02.000 --> 00:38:04.000
And now there's a kink in the system, you know,

489
00:38:04.000 --> 00:38:07.000
like there's no kinks.

490
00:38:07.000 --> 00:38:11.000
And one of the things that I've learned is.

491
00:38:11.000 --> 00:38:13.000
And I've learned this by having to go through it.

492
00:38:14.000 --> 00:38:19.000
I've learned it. And so whenever there is an issue now.

493
00:38:19.000 --> 00:38:22.000
And never, there's a kink and the problem in this, in the thing,

494
00:38:22.000 --> 00:38:25.000
like I'm trying to get somewhere and like, say for instance,

495
00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:29.000
God has made everything smooth. And then I get to this one point.

496
00:38:29.000 --> 00:38:35.000
And there's like a traffic jam or someone says, you know, no, man.

497
00:38:35.000 --> 00:38:37.000
You know, that's, you know, that's not right.

498
00:38:37.000 --> 00:38:41.000
You haven't followed the process or we need you to do this extra thing

499
00:38:41.000 --> 00:38:44.000
or whatever it was. In other words, something's unexpected.

500
00:38:44.000 --> 00:38:48.000
When it looked like what I've been taking it as is.

501
00:38:48.000 --> 00:38:52.000
See, God is clearing a path for me and everything's good.

502
00:38:52.000 --> 00:38:55.000
And people are messing with it.

503
00:38:55.000 --> 00:38:58.000
More powerful.

504
00:38:58.000 --> 00:39:01.000
God is. So therefore.

505
00:39:01.000 --> 00:39:03.000
I am not in lack,

506
00:39:03.000 --> 00:39:08.000
even if the world presents and makes it look like to me.

507
00:39:08.000 --> 00:39:14.000
As if I'm in lack as if it is denying me something.

508
00:39:14.000 --> 00:39:19.000
Or that it is not letting God fix it for me.

509
00:39:19.000 --> 00:39:22.000
I just have to remember it. Nope.

510
00:39:22.000 --> 00:39:27.000
Even in this situation where the evidence that the world is presenting

511
00:39:27.000 --> 00:39:31.000
to me is telling me that God isn't true.

512
00:39:31.000 --> 00:39:34.000
Or that meaning like, I didn't mean that God doesn't exist. You know,

513
00:39:34.000 --> 00:39:36.000
we're not usually.

514
00:39:36.000 --> 00:39:39.000
You know, challenging that usually it's just that.

515
00:39:39.000 --> 00:39:44.000
Well, God's not taking care of me or God's abandoned me or, you know,

516
00:39:44.000 --> 00:39:48.000
God looked the other way at the wrong second, or, you know,

517
00:39:48.000 --> 00:39:51.000
he doesn't love me to the degree that he says he does,

518
00:39:51.000 --> 00:39:54.000
or he's causing the pain or whatever accusation, you know, comes up.

519
00:39:54.000 --> 00:39:56.000
I have to choose. Nope.

520
00:39:56.000 --> 00:39:59.000
God didn't change who he was.

521
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:07.000
between now and five minutes ago, when everything was going smooth, it's all the same.

522
00:40:07.000 --> 00:40:10.940
He's still the same and I'm still safe.

523
00:40:10.940 --> 00:40:12.600
I'm still in abundance.

524
00:40:12.600 --> 00:40:14.880
I still have everything.

525
00:40:14.880 --> 00:40:21.880
And the thwart of the physical process of, and you know, in the hindrance and the kink

526
00:40:21.880 --> 00:40:27.160
in the system is not threatening.

527
00:40:27.160 --> 00:40:35.920
It's not keeping me from, it's not more powerful and keeping me from being physically well.

528
00:40:35.920 --> 00:40:45.320
It's not, it's not thwarting God's provision for me or, you know, or protection of me or

529
00:40:45.320 --> 00:40:46.320
whatever.

530
00:40:46.320 --> 00:40:54.360
And so I've noticed that if I don't use that, if I don't feel threatened by the situation,

531
00:40:54.360 --> 00:40:56.800
I'm like, no, I'm not threatened.

532
00:40:56.800 --> 00:41:03.960
You know, even if I have to leave this place because they won't let me see, they won't

533
00:41:03.960 --> 00:41:05.960
let me see the person.

534
00:41:05.960 --> 00:41:11.040
And they say that they don't have it on the books or they say that I don't have authorization

535
00:41:11.040 --> 00:41:18.440
and I needed authorization, you know, whatever, even if that is true, you know, God is still,

536
00:41:18.440 --> 00:41:21.520
is still moving and God could do anything.

537
00:41:21.680 --> 00:41:26.240
God could literally heal me in a second without having to go through this whole process, let

538
00:41:26.240 --> 00:41:28.240
alone need a doctor or anything else.

539
00:41:28.240 --> 00:41:32.200
So apparently this is just a process that I'm going through.

540
00:41:32.200 --> 00:41:37.320
So I let God take me through the process and I enjoy the fact that he and I are doing it

541
00:41:37.320 --> 00:41:40.440
together as opposed to choosing.

542
00:41:40.440 --> 00:41:46.300
I don't want to go through this and making that more important, my, my, my resistance

543
00:41:46.300 --> 00:41:52.140
to it and not wanting that as more important than my enjoyment of doing something with

544
00:41:52.140 --> 00:41:53.140
him.

545
00:41:53.140 --> 00:41:59.540
And so then I'm choosing that over him because I don't want this and I don't want it so bad.

546
00:41:59.540 --> 00:42:06.940
You know, it's so badly that I don't want this, that I'm choosing resistance to it over

547
00:42:06.940 --> 00:42:11.580
letting it go and enjoying the fact that he and I are doing something together and allowing

548
00:42:11.580 --> 00:42:16.420
him to work out all the kinks because that is usually when the Lord starts again, when

549
00:42:16.420 --> 00:42:20.140
like what I was talking about yesterday, when you finally let the thing go, the Lord's final,

550
00:42:20.140 --> 00:42:22.340
like, okay, now I can move.

551
00:42:22.340 --> 00:42:28.780
It's when we shut down, in fact, I, Oh, I don't think that I get talk about it in this,

552
00:42:28.780 --> 00:42:29.780
in this series.

553
00:42:29.780 --> 00:42:34.620
I think that I talked about it in session eight or nine, and we're not going to get

554
00:42:34.620 --> 00:42:40.300
to that one in this, in this rest intensive, but, um, in session eight or nine, we're in

555
00:42:40.300 --> 00:42:43.100
operating the spirit, which I think you've watched most of them.

556
00:42:43.100 --> 00:42:46.020
So you probably, okay.

557
00:42:46.020 --> 00:42:49.060
So you know that the spirit is a river.

558
00:42:49.060 --> 00:42:53.780
So in operating in the spirit, in other words, choosing that, you know, uh, and choosing

559
00:42:53.780 --> 00:42:59.080
that to just let everything go and to just operate with the Lord, that we put our hands

560
00:42:59.080 --> 00:43:05.380
in the river and just allow the river, the spirit to flow through our hands, you know,

561
00:43:05.380 --> 00:43:07.540
the water to flow through up and around it.

562
00:43:07.540 --> 00:43:12.380
And we get to experience so much more of the, of the spirit like that, but when we,

563
00:43:12.380 --> 00:43:16.260
when we decide we like a certain aspect of the spirit and how it's manifesting, we're

564
00:43:16.260 --> 00:43:22.140
like, I really would like to keep this and have it look like this all the time.

565
00:43:22.140 --> 00:43:29.100
We try to, we try to close in on it, but when we do, we, we, what we discover is we couldn't

566
00:43:29.100 --> 00:43:30.660
grab it.

567
00:43:30.660 --> 00:43:34.940
And all that it did is because we tightened our fists and took them up out of the water

568
00:43:34.940 --> 00:43:40.820
to try to hold on to that thing and to make sure that we, it, we, it couldn't escape.

569
00:43:40.820 --> 00:43:46.260
What we've done is we've brought death to it because death means that you is a lack

570
00:43:46.260 --> 00:43:48.780
of movement in the spirit.

571
00:43:48.780 --> 00:43:50.780
Everything has to keep moving.

572
00:43:50.780 --> 00:43:57.940
So that's why, as soon as I let the situation go and stop holding it in an accusation against

573
00:43:57.940 --> 00:44:02.340
the Lord and stop resisting it and be like, I don't like this, this isn't fair.

574
00:44:02.340 --> 00:44:03.940
You know, this is inconvenient.

575
00:44:03.940 --> 00:44:05.340
I had to take off work.

576
00:44:05.340 --> 00:44:08.340
I had to do this and now I'm going to have to do it again.

577
00:44:08.340 --> 00:44:09.700
I don't do that.

578
00:44:09.700 --> 00:44:16.620
That is because we're so used to scheduling or controlling our schedule and our time and

579
00:44:16.620 --> 00:44:23.460
our money and our effort in such a way that we could protect for and provide for ourselves.

580
00:44:23.460 --> 00:44:28.740
And so if we no longer have to provide for and protect ourselves and God now does, well,

581
00:44:28.740 --> 00:44:33.380
then what does that mean for our schedule and our time and our, whatever it means that

582
00:44:33.780 --> 00:44:36.780
you can go anywhere.

583
00:44:36.780 --> 00:44:37.780
You can do anything.

584
00:44:37.780 --> 00:44:44.500
You can, you know, you can do, you can go back from the doctor's appointment and go

585
00:44:44.500 --> 00:44:48.700
back to work and, you know, go back to your house and go back to work.

586
00:44:48.700 --> 00:44:54.580
And then a week later, when they say you to come in, you like release everything, you

587
00:44:54.580 --> 00:45:00.020
know, to the Lord of like, okay, Lord, if you, you, I give the consequence.

588
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:06.520
And the potential results of how this could affect my body or my schedule or my relationship

589
00:45:06.520 --> 00:45:11.680
with my boss or whatever feels like it's being threatened, Lord, you're taking care of me.

590
00:45:11.680 --> 00:45:17.680
I don't have to control these, all of these different items in order for me to be safe.

591
00:45:17.680 --> 00:45:23.800
You my safety is in you and you can move this stuff around in whatever way you want to,

592
00:45:23.800 --> 00:45:26.640
or not move it around and still keep me safe.

593
00:45:26.640 --> 00:45:28.320
You can just do whatever it is you want to do.

594
00:45:28.320 --> 00:45:29.320
So true Lord.

595
00:45:29.320 --> 00:45:30.320
Okay.

596
00:45:30.320 --> 00:45:31.320
Fit a week later.

597
00:45:31.320 --> 00:45:32.320
Okay.

598
00:45:32.320 --> 00:45:33.320
Now here it is.

599
00:45:33.320 --> 00:45:34.400
I find myself back in the same situation.

600
00:45:34.400 --> 00:45:35.400
That's fine.

601
00:45:35.400 --> 00:45:38.960
I am living life with the Lord and living life with the Lord means we're going to the

602
00:45:38.960 --> 00:45:43.400
same dadgum appointment twice because the first time they wouldn't let me in the door.

603
00:45:43.400 --> 00:45:45.080
So here I go again.

604
00:45:45.080 --> 00:45:50.320
And it's me and God living life together as opposed to feeling like they have more power

605
00:45:50.320 --> 00:45:51.320
than God in my life.

606
00:45:51.320 --> 00:45:54.880
And they're standing in the way God's trying to do something good.

607
00:45:54.880 --> 00:45:57.320
God's trying to make this new path for me.

608
00:45:57.320 --> 00:46:00.440
And they're standing in the way they're not a threat.

609
00:46:00.440 --> 00:46:02.400
It's that kind of a process.

610
00:46:02.400 --> 00:46:07.520
And so that's how a lot of our unrest starts manifesting itself in those situations.

611
00:46:07.520 --> 00:46:08.520
Yeah.

612
00:46:08.520 --> 00:46:14.280
Well, anyway, so that's helpful to kind of like see it from that perspective, how those

613
00:46:14.280 --> 00:46:15.680
things start coming up.

614
00:46:15.680 --> 00:46:18.080
It's like, Oh, so that's what that is.

615
00:46:18.080 --> 00:46:21.760
My point is God's like, life is more free.

616
00:46:21.760 --> 00:46:23.120
You were more free.

617
00:46:23.120 --> 00:46:29.480
All of the things that feel like a threat, you're really not in the danger that you thought

618
00:46:29.480 --> 00:46:31.040
that you were.

619
00:46:31.040 --> 00:46:34.200
And so God's just like, I want you to know you're not in that danger.

620
00:46:34.200 --> 00:46:37.880
I want you to live, not feeling in danger.

621
00:46:37.880 --> 00:46:40.520
I want you to feel unthreatened.

622
00:46:40.520 --> 00:46:46.000
I want you to feel and experience that freedom because you've always had it, but you haven't

623
00:46:46.000 --> 00:46:48.040
been experiencing it.

624
00:46:48.040 --> 00:46:52.680
So what I wanted to invite you into is you're now going through this pain.

625
00:46:53.240 --> 00:46:57.720
In other words, this frustration, this, wait a minute, no one ever told me that I needed

626
00:46:57.720 --> 00:47:04.200
authorization and that frustration, God allows us to go through that so that we can choose

627
00:47:04.200 --> 00:47:09.560
I'm not threatened because going through it is how we overcome it, how we make a different

628
00:47:09.560 --> 00:47:12.080
choice instead of receiving the unbelief.

629
00:47:12.080 --> 00:47:14.080
We're like, Nope, that is not true.

630
00:47:14.080 --> 00:47:17.160
So anyway, but what were you going to say?

631
00:47:17.560 --> 00:47:24.280
Well, I was going to say, see, I was really supposed to have two appointments that day

632
00:47:24.280 --> 00:47:30.160
and I didn't say anything about the second appointment that was for the mapping and the

633
00:47:30.160 --> 00:47:32.000
all the tattooing thing.

634
00:47:32.000 --> 00:47:36.480
And so at first they said, we're going to have you come back for that.

635
00:47:36.480 --> 00:47:38.240
But I didn't say anything.

636
00:47:38.240 --> 00:47:42.000
And then they said, no, you already have that appointment.

637
00:47:42.080 --> 00:47:46.080
So, you know, yeah.

638
00:47:46.080 --> 00:47:49.480
So, I mean, looking back, you know.

639
00:47:49.480 --> 00:47:55.480
I mean, I guess what kind of one thing that kind of got to me was, well, what if God's

640
00:47:55.480 --> 00:48:01.120
throwing up these barriers because he doesn't really want me to have the radiation therapy?

641
00:48:01.120 --> 00:48:03.320
But I don't think that was it.

642
00:48:03.320 --> 00:48:10.040
I think when hearing you talk now, I think it was these obstacles came up and it threw

643
00:48:10.080 --> 00:48:19.240
me off and and I wasn't looking to him as my safety.

644
00:48:19.240 --> 00:48:26.920
And if I had been doing that, then I could have taken it more in stride and, oh, you're

645
00:48:26.920 --> 00:48:28.360
going to send me home.

646
00:48:28.360 --> 00:48:30.160
Oh, dear.

647
00:48:30.160 --> 00:48:30.920
You know?

648
00:48:30.920 --> 00:48:31.840
Yeah.

649
00:48:31.840 --> 00:48:34.560
The whole point is you getting to live in more freedom.

650
00:48:34.560 --> 00:48:38.280
It's not condemnation for how you handle it or what you did.

651
00:48:38.280 --> 00:48:41.760
It's like life feels hard that way.

652
00:48:41.760 --> 00:48:45.240
God's like, it does if you want.

653
00:48:45.240 --> 00:48:46.400
Yeah.

654
00:48:46.400 --> 00:48:47.960
It's like you don't have to if you want.

655
00:48:47.960 --> 00:48:49.560
That's how you've been experiencing it.

656
00:48:49.560 --> 00:48:53.880
When she would like to experience more love and freedom, you're already in the more love

657
00:48:53.880 --> 00:48:54.720
and freedom.

658
00:48:54.720 --> 00:48:59.480
But if we're not allowing ourselves to experience it because we're trusting in something else

659
00:48:59.480 --> 00:49:05.320
other than God, it means we're not experiencing all of the benefits that we have access to.

660
00:49:05.320 --> 00:49:07.040
So God's just giving you a choice.

661
00:49:07.040 --> 00:49:09.960
Would you like to experience more of it or not?

662
00:49:09.960 --> 00:49:11.760
Yeah, he's still the same.

663
00:49:11.760 --> 00:49:13.520
You're still connected to him in the same.

664
00:49:13.520 --> 00:49:17.120
He's not going to give you more of himself than he's already given you because he's already

665
00:49:17.120 --> 00:49:18.280
given you everything.

666
00:49:18.280 --> 00:49:19.960
So you're not gaining more.

667
00:49:19.960 --> 00:49:28.000
You're just gaining access, not access, but like experience of it.

668
00:49:28.000 --> 00:49:33.720
You're allowing yourself to to be touched by it, to be affected by it, your life, to

669
00:49:33.720 --> 00:49:34.560
be affected by it.

670
00:49:34.560 --> 00:49:36.760
So, yeah, that's what that is.

671
00:49:36.760 --> 00:49:38.360
It's not condemnation.

672
00:49:38.360 --> 00:49:39.800
Yeah.

673
00:49:39.800 --> 00:49:48.640
And I think it's applying to the work situation, too, because of all these changes coming up.

674
00:49:48.640 --> 00:49:50.720
And.

675
00:49:50.720 --> 00:49:52.840
I mean, I think.

676
00:49:52.840 --> 00:49:59.040
You know, and I was kind of getting upset with the nurses because they were getting upset.

677
00:49:59.040 --> 00:50:00.040
So in.

678
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:05.360
Instead, it's, well, let's see what's going to happen, you

679
00:50:05.360 --> 00:50:09.520
know, and not be frustrated with the changes.

680
00:50:10.360 --> 00:50:13.600
Yeah, yeah. And just presenting to the Lord like, okay, Lord,

681
00:50:13.600 --> 00:50:15.960
you and I living together. And this is our situation that we're

682
00:50:15.960 --> 00:50:18.440
living in, where there's this company I work for with all

683
00:50:18.440 --> 00:50:24.280
these changes. You know, what, how, you know, what are the

684
00:50:24.280 --> 00:50:27.560
things, what are the things that we can start doing? What are the

685
00:50:27.560 --> 00:50:32.920
actions that we can take, etc, without being burdened by

686
00:50:32.920 --> 00:50:39.000
feeling threatened, or by doing actions out of fear, that we're

687
00:50:39.000 --> 00:50:43.520
going to be threatened. You know, then that leaves us free

688
00:50:43.520 --> 00:50:49.120
to act and to do and to make decisions with the Lord. Because

689
00:50:49.120 --> 00:50:53.240
they're not because our actions aren't burdened, but with the

690
00:50:53.240 --> 00:50:57.200
responsibility of determining the outcome. We're letting God

691
00:50:57.200 --> 00:51:00.680
take care of the outcome. And now we just could get to start

692
00:51:00.680 --> 00:51:04.520
acting like, okay, well, let's see now that now that God's

693
00:51:04.520 --> 00:51:06.680
gonna take care of everything, and I don't know how it's going

694
00:51:06.680 --> 00:51:08.680
to do it. I don't know if it's going to take me through pain or

695
00:51:08.680 --> 00:51:12.600
comfort. What kind of actions Lord should we do? Should we

696
00:51:12.600 --> 00:51:16.520
talk to the supervisor? Should we sign this petition? Should

697
00:51:16.520 --> 00:51:21.920
we? You know, how do I how do I call this nurse down? Should I

698
00:51:21.920 --> 00:51:26.400
you know, what what do we do? The whole point is to do it

699
00:51:27.280 --> 00:51:31.280
coming into agreement with God that you are in a place of

700
00:51:31.280 --> 00:51:35.080
abundance, and protection and provision and you're not being

701
00:51:35.080 --> 00:51:43.280
threatened. Yeah, you can still I'm taking notes. Sorry. No,

702
00:51:43.280 --> 00:51:48.600
you're fine. You can still lose your job. You could still be

703
00:51:48.600 --> 00:51:51.760
denied the doctor's appointment, you all of those

704
00:51:51.760 --> 00:51:55.320
things. It's not the doctor's appointment that's going to heal

705
00:51:55.320 --> 00:52:02.160
you. It's not the job that provides for you. It's just God

706
00:52:02.160 --> 00:52:08.040
does all of that. And he uses different modalities as a way

707
00:52:08.040 --> 00:52:12.240
through which his provision or his healing will flow. Will it

708
00:52:12.240 --> 00:52:15.720
flow through the doctor's hands? Or will because that's what he

709
00:52:15.720 --> 00:52:19.600
chooses? Or will it flow through? You know, I don't know,

710
00:52:19.600 --> 00:52:22.960
chemo radiation? Will it flow through something else? You

711
00:52:22.960 --> 00:52:27.280
know, will it flow through, you know, getting a new job? Will it

712
00:52:27.280 --> 00:52:31.160
flow through the fact that God will use you to just be an

713
00:52:31.160 --> 00:52:34.440
anchor for everybody's, you know, emotions, and then they

714
00:52:34.440 --> 00:52:38.760
will change as a result. All but whatever it is, you know, and

715
00:52:38.760 --> 00:52:41.600
then God can provide for you as in like, he could give you all

716
00:52:41.600 --> 00:52:45.560
kinds of stuff without giving you money for it. He could, you

717
00:52:45.560 --> 00:52:51.880
know, the way that I worded is that we can, that when we're

718
00:52:51.880 --> 00:52:57.680
hungry, that God can either give that God can either give us

719
00:52:57.720 --> 00:53:02.000
food, he can give us money to get food, or he could just

720
00:53:02.000 --> 00:53:06.800
simply not make us hungry. All those ways it's in providing for

721
00:53:06.800 --> 00:53:11.640
us. Or he can take us through hunger, where we just where we

722
00:53:11.640 --> 00:53:15.840
just simply rely on him. Anyway, either way, what we

723
00:53:15.840 --> 00:53:20.400
experience here on earth does not determine provision or

724
00:53:20.400 --> 00:53:24.400
protection. That is in the spirit. That is where everything

725
00:53:24.400 --> 00:53:28.320
exists. And we're just seeing how do we express it Lord, in

726
00:53:28.320 --> 00:53:35.720
the physical form. This is all the, quote, unquote, after

727
00:53:35.720 --> 00:53:39.680
effect of something that already exists and a decision that's

728
00:53:39.680 --> 00:53:44.560
already made in a position we're already in. So anyway, it

729
00:53:44.560 --> 00:53:48.520
doesn't determine anything down here. I mean, like, what we do

730
00:53:48.520 --> 00:53:52.120
here doesn't determine anything in the spirit. Sometimes we do

731
00:53:52.120 --> 00:53:55.000
things in order to help our soul, like make a choice, etc.

732
00:53:55.240 --> 00:53:59.120
But all that is, is an anchor for the soul. But, you know,

733
00:53:59.120 --> 00:54:02.080
things are done up in the spirit, and we're trying to get

734
00:54:02.080 --> 00:54:07.520
it, you know, to open our soul to be safe with our feel safe

735
00:54:07.520 --> 00:54:12.320
with our spirit, so that we express the spirit down through

736
00:54:12.320 --> 00:54:16.760
the soul down through the body so that God is finally seen. So

737
00:54:16.760 --> 00:54:20.240
anyway, the point is, we're not under threat, no matter what

738
00:54:20.240 --> 00:54:23.600
this world looks like. Yeah, no matter what.

739
00:54:24.840 --> 00:54:30.800
The situation coming at it coming like something is coming

740
00:54:30.800 --> 00:54:36.160
up. I know, because that doctor said we're having a huddle as a

741
00:54:36.200 --> 00:54:40.480
sudden, I get the word that he just when we started talking, so

742
00:54:40.480 --> 00:54:46.080
I know he he doesn't call huddles. So that means

743
00:54:46.080 --> 00:54:51.520
something is coming up. So to take it as okay, God is in

744
00:54:51.520 --> 00:54:55.280
control of all this. And no matter what is said, I don't

745
00:54:55.280 --> 00:54:58.640
need to get upset about it. You know, whatever.

746
00:55:00.880 --> 00:55:03.120
whatever the thing is.

747
00:55:03.120 --> 00:55:03.960
It's kind of-

748
00:55:03.960 --> 00:55:07.520
It can't threaten you and provide for or protect you.

749
00:55:07.520 --> 00:55:08.360
Yeah.

750
00:55:08.360 --> 00:55:10.120
So it's kind of looking at life

751
00:55:10.120 --> 00:55:12.760
in a totally different way, isn't it?

752
00:55:12.760 --> 00:55:15.440
And everything that happens every day

753
00:55:16.760 --> 00:55:19.040
in a totally different perspective.

754
00:55:19.040 --> 00:55:19.880
Correct, yeah.

755
00:55:21.480 --> 00:55:22.960
Yeah.

756
00:55:22.960 --> 00:55:27.120
And so it takes away the burdens of life, doesn't it?

757
00:55:27.120 --> 00:55:29.000
Yes, exactly.

758
00:55:29.000 --> 00:55:34.000
Now the job isn't a burden because you're getting money

759
00:55:34.840 --> 00:55:37.920
and therefore food and housing rent

760
00:55:37.920 --> 00:55:42.920
and all of that stuff is based off of God,

761
00:55:44.040 --> 00:55:47.200
not on your job, which frees you,

762
00:55:47.200 --> 00:55:49.840
which frees your job from the pressure in your mind

763
00:55:49.840 --> 00:55:51.200
so you don't dread Mondays.

764
00:55:52.320 --> 00:55:56.000
Because it's not your job and your performance

765
00:55:56.000 --> 00:56:01.000
is not dependent on your interaction with it.

766
00:56:02.600 --> 00:56:05.720
That's just something you and God are doing together

767
00:56:05.720 --> 00:56:07.720
in which you're expressing who you and he are

768
00:56:07.720 --> 00:56:08.880
into the physical realm.

769
00:56:08.880 --> 00:56:10.200
You're interacting with people,

770
00:56:10.200 --> 00:56:12.400
you're bringing more creation

771
00:56:12.400 --> 00:56:14.320
and releasing more of it from frustration

772
00:56:14.320 --> 00:56:16.680
by bringing more of God's spirit,

773
00:56:16.680 --> 00:56:19.720
more of bringing chaos into order,

774
00:56:21.360 --> 00:56:25.160
designing and customizing software, et cetera.

775
00:56:26.000 --> 00:56:31.000
You know, it's not, it's once your job is

776
00:56:32.400 --> 00:56:35.400
and your actions and your interactions with your job

777
00:56:35.400 --> 00:56:39.200
are free from the burden and the weight

778
00:56:39.200 --> 00:56:42.360
of creating an outcome and determining the outcome,

779
00:56:43.200 --> 00:56:45.800
you will find that you will do your best work.

780
00:56:45.800 --> 00:56:49.080
You will find that now that you're free of pressure,

781
00:56:49.080 --> 00:56:52.360
that it's a lot easier to come up with solutions.

782
00:56:52.360 --> 00:56:54.480
It's a lot easier to problem solve.

783
00:56:56.360 --> 00:57:00.320
You feel more, you feel happier

784
00:57:00.320 --> 00:57:04.480
because you're not emotionally stressed and pressured.

785
00:57:04.480 --> 00:57:07.520
And you find that you will enjoy jobs you used to hate.

786
00:57:09.040 --> 00:57:11.160
There's a lot of times the reason we hate the job

787
00:57:11.160 --> 00:57:13.760
is the pressure that it is creating

788
00:57:13.760 --> 00:57:17.160
based off of the belief that we are,

789
00:57:17.160 --> 00:57:19.440
that the unbelief that we're in with the Lord

790
00:57:19.440 --> 00:57:22.760
that we've now attached to the job we blamed it for.

791
00:57:22.760 --> 00:57:24.520
And really it's not the job's fault.

792
00:57:24.560 --> 00:57:27.560
It's like, you know, God's like, hey, your dog.

793
00:57:27.560 --> 00:57:31.480
Yeah, I help, I create the outcome,

794
00:57:31.480 --> 00:57:34.400
not your action or your inaction.

795
00:57:34.400 --> 00:57:36.520
So once that's the case, you're like, oh my word,

796
00:57:36.520 --> 00:57:38.120
now life's fun.

797
00:57:38.120 --> 00:57:42.080
Now my job's fun because I'm just doing it

798
00:57:42.080 --> 00:57:45.600
and I'm just doing my best, you know?

799
00:57:45.600 --> 00:57:49.320
Yeah, and then that takes away from, you know,

800
00:57:49.320 --> 00:57:54.320
like one of the bosses, the one at the very top,

801
00:57:55.520 --> 00:58:00.440
that, I mean, has things to do with us.

802
00:58:01.520 --> 00:58:06.520
She is, she's not a good leader, you know?

803
00:58:07.200 --> 00:58:12.200
I mean, it's, I mean, Condescending, you know,

804
00:58:15.200 --> 00:58:19.160
told someone that was doing a demonstration

805
00:58:19.160 --> 00:58:24.160
that she should do Control C or Control V to paste.

806
00:58:25.200 --> 00:58:26.800
You know, copy and paste.

807
00:58:26.800 --> 00:58:30.440
Well, I mean, everybody has their own preferences,

808
00:58:30.440 --> 00:58:34.400
but it was that sort of thing that she was doing.

809
00:58:34.400 --> 00:58:39.280
And the one right below her, I like,

810
00:58:39.280 --> 00:58:42.960
and the one right below her is over my,

811
00:58:42.960 --> 00:58:47.040
the manager that I work with in care management.

812
00:58:47.040 --> 00:58:52.040
So it's kind of like, okay, if somebody says something

813
00:58:53.040 --> 00:58:55.040
that's really off the wall,

814
00:58:56.440 --> 00:58:58.960
and I have a meeting with this guy who,

815
00:59:02.840 --> 00:59:07.840
like there's another gal who works on Epic

816
00:59:08.760 --> 00:59:10.160
on our computer system.

817
00:59:10.160 --> 00:59:13.360
She works with the referrals and the authorizations

818
00:59:13.360 --> 00:59:16.240
and the inpatient nurses.

819
00:59:16.240 --> 00:59:19.480
And so this guy and our computer systems

820
00:59:19.480 --> 00:59:20.760
are totally different.

821
00:59:20.760 --> 00:59:21.880
They don't meet.

822
00:59:22.720 --> 00:59:25.680
I mean, it's still the same Epic system,

823
00:59:25.680 --> 00:59:28.120
but what she's doing and what I'm doing,

824
00:59:28.120 --> 00:59:30.440
it just doesn't meet.

825
00:59:30.440 --> 00:59:35.440
And so this guy is from, you know, the top people.

826
00:59:37.680 --> 00:59:42.680
And so he's wanting to do in her program,

827
00:59:44.240 --> 00:59:49.080
what I do in mine, which it can't, you can't do it,

828
00:59:49.080 --> 00:59:50.440
you know, but anyway,

829
00:59:50.480 --> 00:59:54.000
so I'm meeting with him and my first response was, oh no,

830
00:59:54.000 --> 00:59:59.000
I've already told him, you know, and so just to go.

831
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:07.120
at it with, okay, Lord, and not be upset about what he says when

832
01:00:07.120 --> 01:00:08.720
I've already explained that.

833
01:00:12.080 --> 01:00:17.360
Because it's you being a son of God. And basically, basically,

834
01:00:17.560 --> 01:00:21.760
as weird as it might sound, loving on and taking care of

835
01:00:21.760 --> 01:00:26.240
someone else. It's like, they're just not they, they, they're,

836
01:00:26.240 --> 01:00:29.920
they're trying to do their best. And they're just not quite,

837
01:00:30.400 --> 01:00:33.080
quite getting it. And we all want love and compassion for

838
01:00:33.080 --> 01:00:36.240
something that we're trying so hard to do the right thing for.

839
01:00:36.680 --> 01:00:39.760
And it's, you know, we don't know, in our ignorance, we

840
01:00:39.760 --> 01:00:43.320
don't know that we're not doing it. And so I always kind of

841
01:00:43.320 --> 01:00:47.280
approach the situation says, as well, they don't know, this is

842
01:00:47.280 --> 01:00:52.160
a way for me to love on them, by the fact that I've already told

843
01:00:52.160 --> 01:00:56.280
them this, and I don't want to tell them this again. But to

844
01:00:56.280 --> 01:01:00.880
love on them is going to require me repeating myself is the same

845
01:01:00.880 --> 01:01:03.840
thing as like a child, you know, finding themselves in a

846
01:01:03.840 --> 01:01:06.680
difficult situation. Again, you're going, look, I've already

847
01:01:06.680 --> 01:01:09.160
told you. So instead of condemning them, if God doesn't

848
01:01:09.160 --> 01:01:13.760
condemn us, I can love them. And it would be my way of like

849
01:01:13.760 --> 01:01:19.000
supporting them spiritually in the spirit, in such a way that,

850
01:01:19.440 --> 01:01:23.040
that stuff like that, as weird as it might sound, can actually

851
01:01:23.040 --> 01:01:29.480
start to transform someone. And because it allows your spirit to

852
01:01:29.480 --> 01:01:32.920
touch their soul, which, in other words, it gives an

853
01:01:32.920 --> 01:01:36.360
opportunity to interact with God. And yeah, we're not talking

854
01:01:36.360 --> 01:01:38.160
about the fact that you're preaching to him, and you're

855
01:01:38.160 --> 01:01:41.440
saying God or anything, just simply the fact that your

856
01:01:41.440 --> 01:01:45.320
spirit that's loving on, and not holding them under any

857
01:01:45.320 --> 01:01:48.480
obligation or any condemnation for where it is that they are.

858
01:01:49.040 --> 01:01:53.320
But just loving on and giving to them, it can actually transform

859
01:01:53.320 --> 01:01:55.800
them, even though they don't even know what you're doing.

860
01:01:55.920 --> 01:01:58.520
They don't remember that you've already told them probably or

861
01:01:58.520 --> 01:02:01.600
whatever. Yeah. And this, I've done this over and over and

862
01:02:01.600 --> 01:02:06.080
over, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, over with non believers. You

863
01:02:06.080 --> 01:02:10.600
know, because I worked more with unbelievers in more unbelievers

864
01:02:10.600 --> 01:02:15.240
in work than believers, I think, at least real believers, you

865
01:02:15.240 --> 01:02:18.440
know, serious ones. There's lots of people, especially in Texas

866
01:02:18.440 --> 01:02:21.880
that say that they are believers. But um, but anyway,

867
01:02:21.880 --> 01:02:25.400
it and I'm telling you what, it completely changed some of these

868
01:02:25.400 --> 01:02:29.880
people completely changed them. And they had no idea that I was

869
01:02:29.880 --> 01:02:32.560
just, you know, because I wouldn't talk to them about Jesus

870
01:02:32.560 --> 01:02:37.200
or anything. And they all that they knew was that I was that

871
01:02:37.200 --> 01:02:43.800
they that they were emotionally safe with me. Because I didn't

872
01:02:43.800 --> 01:02:47.040
treat them like the enemy. I helped them, I would just come

873
01:02:47.040 --> 01:02:49.720
into support. And it's a way that you can be kind of like an

874
01:02:49.720 --> 01:02:55.280
adult in the in the spirit to help someone else. So yeah,

875
01:02:55.440 --> 01:03:00.880
yeah, that makes sense. It's God takes care of you. Even if even

876
01:03:00.880 --> 01:03:05.440
if you could lose your job, it's still not a threat to you to who

877
01:03:05.440 --> 01:03:10.040
you are. Yeah. Does that? Yeah, like everything, all of the

878
01:03:10.040 --> 01:03:14.000
pressure is completely disconnected from the event.

879
01:03:14.240 --> 01:03:18.080
You guys just like, just go through it. Just give it is

880
01:03:18.120 --> 01:03:20.640
give it what you got is I'll take care of you and take care

881
01:03:20.640 --> 01:03:23.080
of the situation. I'm not telling you how it's going to

882
01:03:23.080 --> 01:03:30.760
turn out. It's that I don't it does that the outcome does not

883
01:03:30.760 --> 01:03:34.800
change who you are, does not affect who you are. And you're

884
01:03:34.800 --> 01:03:40.360
not threatened. Because you're always up here. Yeah, yeah.

885
01:03:41.320 --> 01:03:47.160
Yeah, yeah. That's good. Yeah. Yeah, totally different

886
01:03:47.160 --> 01:03:48.200
perspective.

887
01:03:49.920 --> 01:03:53.280
Isn't it though? I know. So you can muse on that with the Lord.

888
01:03:53.320 --> 01:03:55.400
Think about all that. Yeah.

889
01:03:57.960 --> 01:04:02.480
I'm so glad it was helpful. What happened? No questions.

890
01:04:04.200 --> 01:04:07.120
You still just do it. And we're like, Okay, Lord, you just bring

891
01:04:07.120 --> 01:04:12.440
stuff up. So yeah, yeah, that was that was good. Yeah. I can

892
01:04:12.440 --> 01:04:19.520
see the kind of the posture or how you go into situations.

893
01:04:21.120 --> 01:04:25.680
And yeah, because you never know what people are going to say or

894
01:04:25.680 --> 01:04:31.440
what they're going to ask you for. And getting upset does not

895
01:04:31.440 --> 01:04:32.480
help anything.

896
01:04:33.320 --> 01:04:36.800
Yeah, because getting upset is coming from this perspective

897
01:04:36.800 --> 01:04:43.320
that it has more power over me than I do, or that God does. And

898
01:04:43.320 --> 01:04:47.240
it just doesn't. Yeah, it's gonna ride away.

899
01:04:48.920 --> 01:04:52.680
Yeah. Oh, actually, sorry, we've kind of gone over.

900
01:04:54.760 --> 01:04:59.040
Yeah, no, that's fine. Yeah. Well, I'll let you go though.

901
01:04:59.040 --> 01:04:59.960
But it was good to get to

902
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:03.600
Is it with you. Yeah. Nice visiting with you. Yeah.

903
01:05:05.360 --> 01:05:14.720
And I asked you one question. When this intensive is over. Are you going to other are we still in the intensive in that group or

904
01:05:16.320 --> 01:05:28.400
Not in the community. No, you will have access to the page that the rest intensive members page on the website, you'll have access to all of that stuff. So you have lifetime access to the videos and

905
01:05:28.400 --> 01:05:47.280
Recordings and all of that stuff. So yeah, but the community environment and an interaction and all of that and it is and that is that in November, the last day for that is November 19 yeah okay okay that's good to know. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, thank you.

906
01:05:48.560 --> 01:05:52.480
You're welcome. Good to visit with you. Okay, bye.