Hey everyone, all right, so today we are going to be talking about, I had it turned to that
page, I lost it, is know me that I may know God.
And this is the second, basically the second step in the process.
And remember that the first step is what we talked about last time, learning to be me
with God is how I've titled it.
And remember that that was all about how to first accept ourselves and God as we both
are both God and ourselves and for ourselves, spirit, soul, and body as we are unconditionally,
meaning that, and, and as I talked about, excuse me, last time, meaning that you're,
you're accepting yourself and God without fully knowing everything that you're going
to discover that you and he are.
And by yourself, I'm talking about your spirit, your soul, and your body, all three aspects
of yourself.
You don't fully know who that is.
You don't fully understand yourself.
You haven't fully been exposed to all of yourself.
And we definitely haven't been fully exposed to everything about God either.
Right.
And it's important that on this journey, in order to get to know, in order to get to this
part where we know ourselves and know the Lord, the very first thing that we have to
choose to do is to accept ourselves and God, whatever it is that we discover about it along
the way that we're choosing to fully accept ourselves and him, excuse me, unconditionally.
And remember what that is.
That's faith.
So we are removing conditions and limitations on what, on how, uh, and on how we're going
to respond to God for ourselves.
And that's very important.
The reason that it's important to do first before we do the second thing that we're talking
about today.
So the reason I talked about that other thing first is that in order to know ourselves or
to know God, we have to prove by choosing in faith to fully accept and receive without
judgment.
Whoever it is that we just will discover that God in this are, we have to fully choose to
prove.
We have to provide a safe place of unconditional acceptance in order for God or the different
aspects of ourselves, spirit, soul, and body to reveal themselves because even God won't
reveal himself fully to us until we have chosen to receive him by faith first, because
remember what faith is.
Sorry.
It's so windy here.
I hope that's not coming across on the microphone as remember what faith is.
Faith is choosing to receive what God says about himself to be true and to be the reality
in which we live and which our kingdom that we, that we have been given dominion over
is going to operate by, and we're choosing to believe in, we're choosing that that is
reality without us having any proof that the thing is true or that such and such is going
to happen.
Right.
Or that God, that we've actually seen God manifest himself in that way.
We've actually seen that truth manifest in that way.
Remember we haven't seen that happen.
And that's why it's called faith because it's choosing that what God said is true without
actually having any evidence to found our choice in.
It's just simply that we're choosing to found our choice in the fact that God said it, not
that we have any evidence of it.
So it's the same thing with ourselves.
And what I'm going to be focusing on today is all about knowing ourselves that I may
know God.
And so we're going to be talking about how to know who, how to get to know ourselves
at a deeper level than we ever have before, because, and, and the reason that that is
how is how is important in order for us to also know who God is, is because there's,
we are born of this very DNA and there's aspects of ourselves that meaning like to take yourself
and divide it into different aspects.
Those aspects express and reveal different things about God because you're born from
him.
I mean, your very DNA comes from him.
And the fact that, and God reiterates this when he says, Hey, you know, you are new now,
you are now new creatures.
You are the new man.
You are united with Christ.
You are, as it, as it mentions in, um, Jane, oh, is it James one nine, is that right?
As he is, so are we.
So we have his very character as well.
And so what God is maturing us into is teaching us.
how to express in his character.
And he's first gonna do that by revealing to us
what his character is.
So in other words, that character of his is your character.
So we're needing to allow the different aspects of,
we're needing to get to know ourselves.
Now, remember, in order to reveal who it is that we are
out into creation, in order to live like that,
and as such, we're then going to be revealing who God is.
And by revealing who God is,
by actually seeing who it is that we are
and connecting with that,
it's an aspect of God that he,
and like literally an aspect of God himself
that he put in us and that is expressed in us.
And by seeing those things,
we then get to experience and see,
oh, so that's who God is.
We then get to know God better by knowing ourselves.
And y'all may, well, I think that I mentioned this story,
I think, I'm not sure.
I think I mentioned this story several weeks ago
when we had, we're talking in another session,
but I'm just gonna, I'll repeat the story again,
but just in case, that you look in your session notes,
it says Psalm, excuse me, Psalm 139, 14.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Well, you'll see in here that what I did
is I put into brackets that I praise you
because I am wonderfully and fearfully made.
And the reason I did is that comes from a prophecy,
a prophetic word that was spoken over me
where my pastor had received prophetic words
for two people in the church.
And he said that that's very unusual.
He doesn't receive a lot of prophetic words for people,
but he received one for one man.
And so we started talking to him.
And then he said, and Ashley, way in the back.
And even before he said it, I just felt,
I knew all my word he's coming for me next.
I just know it.
And so the Lord was just preparing me for it.
And so sure enough, he did.
And he said, what the Lord told me to tell you is,
he said, you have not, you have fought against yourself.
You haven't liked who it is that you are.
You haven't chosen to fully receive who it is that you are.
And you're always looking at other people saying,
oh, I wish I could be like that,
or I wish I could be like that,
or I wish I wasn't like this or whatever.
And he said, you've been wanting to know God.
And God tells you, is telling me to tell you
to take the Bible verse,
I am fearfully and wonderfully made,
and to flip the fearfully and wonderfully
and say, I am wonderfully and fearfully made.
And to approach the Lord in that order.
He said, because if you choose,
and you, that you are wonderfully made,
and you get, and you fully accept yourself,
and begin to fully enjoy and get to know
who it is that you are.
He said, that will teach you by that,
by you discovering who it is you are,
you will then learn things about the Lord.
And then you will begin, and then you will fear him.
You know, in a positive aspect of fearing,
not the negative aspect of fearing.
You will appropriately fear the Lord,
because you will learn about him,
by learning about the thing that he created.
Because the creator always puts in
and expresses an aspect of himself in the creation.
So, so this is, so today we're talking
about the second step in the process.
The last step in the process is going to be
what we'll be talking about next time,
which is own yourself,
or, you know, basically, you know, own myself.
And so that'll be the third thing that we'll talk about,
that you, that these things have to be done in order,
or they won't, or you can't, you can't actually do them.
They won't be effective.
You can try to do them out of order.
You can try to know yourself first,
that you might know God,
but without fully accepting yourself before you do it,
and before you choose to fully accept the Lord
for who it is that he is,
unconditionally, not knowing fully yet
what you're going to discover about himself or you,
you won't fully get to not just know yourself and know God,
but you won't, how do I put it?
You won't be able to overcome if you jump in at this stage.
You might get to know some things about yourself,
and you might get to know some things about God,
but you will not be able to actually effectively
use this stage to overcome.
You have to first do the,
have to first be me with God, and you know what this is.
This is the letting go.
This is the letting go part of the process.
And that has to happen first,
before the truth can be revealed.
in order to actually be effective, because that's the whole reason why we're doing this whole thing
is to actually move into the freedom and the benefits that God says that he gave us,
you know, as children. Now, I wanted to touch on this really quick. This, this brick wall,
you know, here, talking about, remember, I'm always talking about the, the struggles that
I've gone through that, that feel that I feel relate to whatever it is that, that we're talking
about in the topic that's, that in that particular session. And here, what I,
the struggle that I wanted to point out is, is, is that I thought that I was,
well, let me just read this verse to you first and then, and then explain it. And hopefully that'll
just make more sense if I do it that way. So Galatians 2, 4, it says, you know, at the bottom
here, because some false believers have infiltrated our ranks to spy on the freedom
we have in Christ Jesus and to make us slaves. So what Galatians is talking about here is that's
when Paul is, is talking, he's talking to the Galatians about the fact that they have just,
that they have struggled trying, trying to accept a different gospel. And Paul is getting onto them
about it. He literally refers to it as, Hey, you were trying to choose a different gospel than the
gospel that we have been preaching to you. And what is that different gospel? He goes on to explain,
explains that that is a gospel of works that in other words, Christ did not finish everything on
the cross. And there's still stuff you have to do, which again, puts you under the law,
which makes you a slave again. And that's what this is referring to saying that our
false believers have infiltrated our ranks to spy on the freedom that we received in the gospel
of Jesus Christ and therefore to make us slaves. So to try to undermine that freedom that we now
received through that gospel of Jesus Christ, and then to preach a different gospel saying
that actually not everything has been finished. You still have stuff to do. God is still holding
you accountable to all of these particular standards in order to be in order for you to
be okay with him. And he said that that's wrong. So anyway, that this is how I defined
who it is that I was. I thought I was resentful. How do I say that appropriately? I was resentful
of the fact that being a Christian felt like I was being enslaved because I had taken on
this thing that Paul is talking about here still happens today. People are infiltrating our ranks,
believers and non-believers and spying on the freedom that we have in Christ and choosing to
try to make people believe that they're actually still enslaved. And unfortunately,
we do not need a lot of convincing that that's true. And it has infiltrated our churches and
our homes to such an extent that it's very common. In fact, it's the most common approach that we
take to the Lord is that it's through works, which is why Paul, even all of those, you know,
couple of thousand years earlier had to speak so strongly against it. We have this propensity
towards it because we've been under the law for literally thousands of years. We as people,
you know, we as humanity, right? And I just felt that that was very, very, I just felt very
oppressed by that, but very oppressed at being a Christian. And that I just felt, and I felt
identified as that, but that is who I am. That is how I have to live. That's what's expected of me
is I have to live according to all of these laws and all of these rules. And then all the
non-Christians have it a lot easier, but a Christian who's supposed to experience this
freedom that they say that I'm supposed to have in Christ, that God says I'm supposed to have in
Christ. I'm actually not experiencing freedom. I don't know why he calls it freedom because it
actually feels harder. It, it feels more depressing. It feels more joyless. So that is, I,
the reason I bring up that one is that was a huge struggle for me because that is how I identified
who I was taught as talking about today, knowing me that I may know God is, is the opposite
of what I was struggling with. I didn't really know me and I was choosing
to stifle who it is that I really was, not allowing.
who it is that I really was the good, the bad, and the ugly to show itself, because
I was just, I felt I was supposed to stifle that and be this other thing that God wanted
me to be.
And that this overcoming self was basically to kill myself.
So it eventually die.
And I'd be this other person, this other person that followed all these standards and
all of these laws and all of these rules, et cetera, it was very, like I keep saying,
it felt very oppressive.
And that was, that was my struggle.
It created a tremendous, tremendous amount of resentment in me against the church, against
authority, like the Christian authority against the Lord, because I thought that they were
imposing all of this on me.
And no matter how hard I worked, I could never please any of them enough.
There was always something more to do.
And so I didn't allow myself to know me.
Why?
Because I thought that I was being identified by God and, and therefore by pastors and other
spiritual authority, you know, who claimed to just be repeating what God was saying.
I thought that they were just all saying, no, who it is that I really am is evil.
I'm bad.
I'm horrible.
So I definitely don't want to get to know me.
I don't want to let me out of the cell, because if I let myself out of the prison and out
of the cell, in other words, if I let myself out of, out of the restraint that I've put
myself under, I'm going to destroy myself and other people because I am a monster that
has a propensity to destruction.
To do all those horrible things, you know, to me and to others that you see on television
that are all in the, in the physical prisons, et cetera.
Right.
Not to mention all kinds of spiritual damage that I felt that I could do, that I felt that
I must have a propensity towards, you know, anyway, and we have to just, and we have to
realize, no, that is not who we are.
When we're discovering who it is that we are, that is the new man revealing himself.
And we have to allow the space for that new man to reveal himself.
And in order to do that, we also, and in order for our whole selves to be taken over by the
new man, you know, including our soul and our body for all of those things to be taken
over by the new man, we have to be honest about what our soul and our body are expressing
right now.
How, what are they, what unbeliefs are they struggling with?
What do they really truly believe?
What decisions are they really truly making in light of those lies, in light of those
fears, in light of that anger, in light of that propensity to self-protection, self-preservation,
you know, we have to allow who it is that we really are to be honest and to come up
and out, but they won't come up and out.
And this is how this connects to the previous, to the previous session.
They will not come up and out including God himself, but we're not really talking about
that right now, but none of these things, God, spirit, soul, or body will reveal themselves
unless we, unless we provide a safe place of unconditional acceptance of who it is that
they are.
And then they will start to come out and then we give proving grounds, I guess what we,
we prove to them that in how we interact with them, that we are not holding judgment against
them, that we're not condemning them.
How do we prove that?
We don't condemn them.
We don't judge them.
We don't talk a good game.
You actually can't do it to them.
You can't judge yourself for thinking that thought.
You can't condemn yourself for doing that thing.
It doesn't mean that we're not saying that those things aren't sins.
What we're saying is we are not in the place to be.
We are not put in a position by God to judge it or to condemn it or just not.
So anyway, in order for it to feel safe enough to come up and out, because it's not unless
it comes up and out that it'll actually go away.
So if you don't want it in you, it has to come up and out.
And the only way for it to come up and out is if it feels safe enough to show its face
and we need to stop actively stifling it.
If we're not allowing it to come up, we're actively, actively stifling.
So anyway, let me pull up my notes here and okay.
So in getting to know ourselves, um, I wanted to remind you that, uh, of some scripture
verses in which God talks about the fact that he knows us.
In other words, we're seen, we're seen, we're acknowledged, we're honored, we're known as
being unique, as being individual.
visualistic, um, Sorry, all of a sudden I was about to go somewhere.
And then, and then where I, what I was about to show you what scripture
verses about show you just all of a sudden left me, um, but anyway,
we're, we're actually known.
There's something in us that wants to be known.
Oh, that's what I was going to say.
That gives us then permission to, sorry, I didn't realize my
things would be dingy.
Uh, my tech be dingy.
Um, we need to, if God knows us then, and he's not afraid of us, then that
gives us permission by example, because God's done it himself, God always
does everything for us first so that we then know by example, that we have
permission to follow in those footsteps and follow in those same footsteps.
If he fully loves and accepts and knows us, it gives us permission to then know
because if he knows us and he's not threatened by what he knows and he can
provide a safe place for us to be that thing, well, then we know that we can
provide that safe place for ourselves as well.
Here's what I mean.
Think about.
Um, the fact that you are currently who it is that you are, that you're
struggling with what it is that you're struggling with, right?
Um, and like, so some people have very obvious sins or I say, obvious
sins, obvious effects of their sins.
So they're into drugs and they're being promiscuous and they're
doing all of these things, right?
But there are other things that other sins, there are other actions that we
take on our sins, on our unbelief that are a lot quieter that we don't even
realize about ourselves and those can evidence themselves as say something
like, uh, jealousy, envy, fear, anger.
Uh, that we're don't even acknowledge to ourselves or realize that we're
feeling or experiencing, right?
So, but we're still experiencing them just because we don't know that we
are, doesn't mean that we're not right.
So we're fully experiencing those things inside of ourselves while God knows it.
Not just now, but for our whole lives, our whole lives that we've lived, not to
mention everything that he knows that we're going to, right?
And if he is fully accepting ourself, accepting us like that, and when we
apologize and we, we repent to him of all of these things that we do know,
but we haven't acknowledged or repented of all of these things that we don't
know that we did and yet God meets with us and talks with us and blesses us and
gives us gifts and gives us direction, et cetera.
If he does that while knowing that we are struggling with the sins that we don't
fully know that we're struggling with, if he can provide us a safe, fully,
unconditionally accepting place to be with him while we're like that, we have
them permission to fully accept ourselves nonjudgmentally being like that too.
That's what God's been doing this whole time.
And he's continuing to do that now.
So we have permission to do that for ourselves.
We have been taught, we've been taught that you can't fully accept yourself
because God doesn't accept who you are either.
And so therefore you need to make sure to, you know, tighten down on, on
different aspects of yourself and reject different aspects of yourself and judge
yourself and condemn yourself, even though these are such negative words that
they wouldn't actually word it like that.
But that's what they're saying.
They're saying, you can't accept those parts of yourself.
You have to get onto yourself and be very hard and very strong.
Why?
Because that's what God's doing.
We've been learning.
That is not what God's doing.
And it is so obvious that that's how we all live, that God still allows bad
things, people to do bad things and still loves and accepts them anyway.
You see that with like drug addicts and homosexuals and, you know, people
living a homosexual lifestyle and people who are acting out these hidden sins,
hidden meaning like these, uh, these unbeliefs that they have about the Lord.
They're acting them out in very obvious ways and God's allowing it to continue
and very often continues to bless them and bless their relationships with other
people and, and, um, helps them find love and pours out, uh, pours out abundance
of opportunities and whatever to them.
Why?
Because God reigns on the just and the unjust.
It says that in Bible, God reigns on the just and the unjust.
He's he's give why?
Because that's who he is.
And if he can do that fully.
Knowing what they're doing, allowing them to do that and be that with him.
Then we can do that as well.
Right.
It's not the same thing as accepting something, accepting
something as if it's not a sin.
You know, and giving it permission to continue.
It's not the same thing, but you're fully accepting something, meaning
that you're not standing in judgment.
Basically you're going to neutral.
So instead of accepting something and embrace it, sorry, instead of
embracing it and actively pursuing it or rejecting it, you're basically,
basically just going to neutral.
And that's what you, that's what we were talking about last
time that you have to do.
When you do that, the, the things that have been hiding themselves
will then reveal themselves.
We'll start to show up.
You'll start acting in ways that you haven't wanted to act.
Why?
Because you're stopping stifling yourself from feeling those feelings.
So you're going to start, you're providing a safe enough environment
for them to start being, for them to start, um, uh, uh, revealing themselves,
revealing how it is that your, your emotions will start revealing themselves.
Oh, it is that you'll start feeling the feelings that you've really been
feeling, which are simply revealing what it is that you believe.
And, um, and that's how we can actually let go of them is when we begin to,
when we allow them to come up and out.
And the reason they're doing that is they feel safe enough to, and then that
gives you the opportunity to, to prove by your, by your interaction with them.
That you really are not judging them, that you really are fully conditioned,
unconditionally accepting yourself and it making it, it meaning your, your soul
or your body making those decisions while it's making up, you're fully accepting
it, you're fully, you're, uh, you're not agreeing with what it's doing.
You're accepting the being the essence of who, uh, of the soul or the body,
the entity itself that is making those decisions.
You're not approving of the decisions.
You're accepting the entity while it's still making those decisions.
See what I'm saying?
Anyway.
Um, so it's important for us to, for us to know that if God already knows us and
is fully loving and accepting ourselves, then we have permission to do the same thing.
And okay.
So I had to make sure that my computer was playing dance that wouldn't die on me.
Um, so first of all, Jeremiah 1, 1, before I formed you in the womb, I knew you.
And then of course we, we know the verse that we just read, you know, I, uh,
let's just read it again.
I am fear.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Your works are wonderful.
I know that full well.
Um, and so God has made us wonderfully.
He purposefully and intentionally made us the way they are, the way that we are.
He knows who it is that we are.
He taught tells Jeremiah before I formed you in the womb, I knew you the essence of
who it is that you are is who knows, even before Jeremiah was created, even before he
came into creation.
It says that before I formed you in the womb, before you were a part of creation, I knew
you.
Um, let's see.
And then I wanted, this is kind of an interesting passage to mention here, but it talks about
the fact that God knows this.
So I wanted to mention it.
It's Galatians four, eight through nine, eight through nine.
Formally, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods.
But now that you know God or rather are known by God, how is it that you are turning back
to those weak and miserable forces?
So scripture is, is, um, is emphasizing there in Galatians four.
Remember we talked about, um, Galatians, um, earlier as well.
Um, talking about the fact that he was, Paul was talking to them about that new gospel
that they were, uh, the gospel of works that they were struggling with and that they had
been receiving.
So again, later on in that passage or later on in that same book, he's talking about the
fact that, Hey, you're struggling with this and how, how could you, and when you were
struggling with all those things, you were, what does it say?
It said, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods.
But now that you know, God, in other words, now that you've chosen this particular gospel,
how is it that you're turning back to those weak and miserable forces and trying to put
yourself under the law again?
And when he talks about all of this, he refers to it as, but now that you know, God, you
know, you become saved, you accept the gospel, et cetera.
But he said, but now that you know, God, or rather, in other words, he corrects himself
himself.
And he says, actually more specifically, more theologically correct.
You are known by God.
So he's just emphasizing the fact that, Hey, God knows you.
He knows who you are.
are, and God's knowing of you, it's kind of a deep theological thing to mention, but God's
knowing of you is what identifies you as you. So if he has, if he is our example, then it proves to
us that we can do the same thing, that we can, that it's not a bad thing to fully love and accept
yourself while you're in sin, if God did that too. Because remember that he died for us, which is the
greatest love and greatest sacrifice that one can do is to die for someone. And he did that while
we were yet sinners. So if he can do that, we can fully love and accept ourselves while we're still
struggling with sin. And, and that's not, it's not a sin to not judge yourself and condemn yourself.
Okay. Let's see. Okay. We're going to be talking about a couple of different things.
We're talking about, about ways that you can get to know yourself. And when we talk about this,
know that what you're, we're talking about knowing the good, the bad, and the ugly about yourself,
allowing those good aspects of yourself to come up as well as not stifling yourself just because
you see you're not, not stifling you experiencing the bad and the ugly in yourself as well.
Because remember, those are just aspects of your flesh that are struggling in unbelief. It's not who
you really are. They're not in your spirit. And remember that your spirit is who it is that you
actually are. That's the seed of your identity. And so these quote unquote, bad things, these lies,
these aspects of unbelief that you're experiencing are all those are just in aspects of unbelief in
your flesh, which are those things that we inherited from the first Adam. And those aren't anything
that you need to feel threatened by. You want to let those things up and out because if they don't
come up, they won't ever go out and you will keep them. So if you don't want to keep them anymore,
and you want to overcome in that specific area and transform those specific areas from flesh
into spirit, then you have to let them come up and out. And I'm sorry. I think I'm, I think that
there is a mosquito or something that has found me and buzzing around me trying to bite. Uh,
so the first thing that, so we're going to be talking about two things that you can look at,
at, um, at, uh, that you can look at in your life that will help you get to know yourself.
And you need to allow these different asks. You need to fully face the truth at these different
aspects of yourself. The first one is emotions. The second one is decisions. So basically your
feelings and your actions. Sure. We could talk about thoughts as well, but I just figured that
these would be, uh, uh, that this would just be a lot cleaner and more simple to talk about,
um, at help to give you a place to start. Um, and okay. So for the emotions, remember that you can't
truly know yourself unless you know, without knowing how you truly feel about a situation
because you are internally responding, whether or not you acknowledge that to yourself.
And it's important that you own yourself and that you be that, um, and in order,
and that you rule your kingdom, cause you were your first, the first domain in your kingdom.
And it is important that you truly know what you think and feel in a situation.
In a situation. Um, and the reason that I talk specifically about feeling is because your,
your emotions reveal to you what you truly believe your emotions are a thermometer.
So they're not a thermostat. You're not supposed to necessarily change your emotions. You're
supposed to change what your emotions are indicating to you. So your emotions are
indicating what it is that you really believe. So if you're, if you're afraid, there's a reason
that you're afraid you're believing something about a situation or a relationship or a person
or whatever. And you're in your emotions are simply reflecting that. And your emotions are always,
always accurate according to what it is you believe they're always telling you what you
believe they are an absolute guaranteed indication of what it is you're believing.
Now, it doesn't mean that what you're believing is true. So if you believe that you are
in a threatening situation, or if you believe someone's those things badly about you,
and you feel that way, it doesn't mean just because you feel that way that it's actually true.
You know, so our feelings are not an.
Indication of the truth of what is happening, what they are an indication
of is the truth of what you believe.
It's not saying that what you believe is true about reality, but they, but
your emotions are always truthfully expressing what you really do believe.
And that lets you know by, by fully allowing yourself to engage with and
interact with your emotions, you can truly get to know yourself.
What is it that I truly am believing?
Instead of thinking, oh, well, you know, experiencing fear.
Oh, I just shouldn't be afraid.
I shouldn't be afraid.
No, or, you know, oh, I'm just so angry.
I just, I shouldn't be angry.
I'm just trying to like get rid of the emotion.
That's not going to help you actually deal with the root issue of why it came up.
So all you're going to do is you're just simply going to stifle it and you're
going to continue to deal with that root issue of, of that your anger is coming
from or your fear is coming from, and it literally will never get resolved.
And it'll always just keep it.
So you'll always just keep having to remind yourself.
Don't get angry.
Don't get angry or, or stifling yourself or slapping yourself or condemning
yourself or getting onto yourself, or just like, you know, buckling down
and, and, uh, and being hard on yourself to just stop being like
that, to stop feeling that.
But what it is you're doing is you're numbing yourself to who it is that you
really are to the point where your emotions won't come up because there'll
be too afraid to reveal who it is that you are because you've taught them.
Hey, no, no, I'm always going to stifle you.
So you're teaching them what you want them to do.
You want them to stay down.
And then you don't get to know who it is that you really are, what it is.
You really do feel what it is that you really do believe.
And it's important that those things that you know, who you are,
there's nothing wrong with you.
It's important for you to know what it is that you feel and what it is that
you think so that you can address and deal with the lies that you're believing
and that you can actually change.
But if you're always stifling it, then you won't ever change.
Um, and I think that my internet might be having issues there.
I hope it doesn't create too big of an issue with the, uh, with the recording.
Um, let's see here.
Oh, and something else that's very, uh, okay.
Well, let me mention this real quick.
Another thing about your emotions is that they reveal the true source and the
reasons for your actions and your decisions.
So the, you know, you brought your decisions and then you have the actions
that are based off of those decisions, which is the second thing that we're
going to be talking about, because right now we're talking about emotions.
Then we're going to be talking about the decisions that you make and your
emotions will reveal the true source.
Of why you made a particular decision, why you did a specific action.
In other words, why is your soul acting out like that?
Why is your body acting out like that?
Not just the things that it does, but like how it's responding health-wise,
you know, do you have a lot of weight on you?
Do you not have a lot of weight on you?
Do you want to eat?
Are you the exact opposite and don't want to eat at all?
And you're, you know, you're anorexic, you know, your body will actually,
your, your, your feelings and your emotions will reveal the source.
In other words, the belief that you have.
That is determining and driving the decisions that you make
and then the actions that you take.
So it's very important to get to know your emotions and here's what it means
in order to, to know your emotions.
You remember what emotions are?
Emotions are feelings.
So in order to know your emotions, you have to feel them.
And I know that there are reasons why we don't want to feel things.
We don't want to feel them because, um, either we're afraid of joy and
happiness because it, we feel like it is, um, you know, it'll be taken away
from us or that we don't want to feel negative emotions because we just,
but we, we don't like the experience.
We don't like the, unless someone's very masochistic or something,
they don't want to feel pain.
They don't, we don't want to feel, um, uh, you know, we
don't want to feel discomfort.
We don't want to feel insecurity.
We don't want to feel loneliness or whatever.
Um, so it's in order to actually, when your emotions come up and I
say that you need to face them, you actually have to allow yourself to feel
them as the only way that you're actually going to know that you feel that way.
And what we'll be talking about later is in order for you to really know
yourself and to let it go, is you have to feel it.
fully. You can't just feel part of it and be like, Oh my goodness. That's scary. You know?
Okay. I feel, okay. I guess I can tell him a little angry. Okay. Oh, okay. I'm angry. I'm
angry. I'll only let myself a little bit. Okay. I just need to deal with it in order for it to
fully be dealt with. You have to allow it to, to, um, to come that you have to fill it to its
fullness. And the reason is that filling its fullness is it coming up and that's why you're
feeling it. You're feeling it build coming up and out to, to release into let go.
Um, okay. This is really, uh, remember also that Jesus was emotionally honest.
Remember in the garden of Gethsemane, he was emotionally honest. He was stressed to such a
degree in the struggle that he was having that he was sweating, you know, drops of blood. So the,
the, those thin little capillaries near his, um, sweat glands were bursting under the stress and
the strain, and he was sweating the drops of blood. He was under that much struggle, um,
between him and between, you know, his spirit and his flesh, you know, spirit is willing,
but the flesh is weak. Um, and so Jesus was emotionally honest with God and neither God
nor Jesus were threatened by Jesus's emotions because the emotions aren't bad. They're
indicative of, of something underneath it. And so remember that Jesus just never gave into it.
He left that aspect of his flesh. That was that he was born with member. He was born with, um,
I see born with, he was born into a world in which flesh, including the stuff in his soul
is subject to, uh, frustration. And that was due to the fact that of course the wages of sin is
death. And so all of creation is experiencing the wages of sin, which is that it's flesh
leading to nothing but death. And so Jesus had to transform all the aspects of his flesh,
including all of those things that his emotions were based off of.
Oh, he had to let them up and out and said, Hey, no, I'm not this thing. This, the flesh,
this is its response. And I'm not holding onto it. I'm not going to allow this thing to stay.
If it was soon as that thing, you know, uh, starts that struggle starts to come that anger is going
to come up and out. So he allowed himself to fully feel those things in order to release it to the
Lord. Um, and, uh, and remember, so also remember your emotions are not bad. There's nothing wrong
with your emotions are indicative of something that you're believing about the Lord, but, or
that you're, that you're believing is true, but your emotions themselves are not bad. So
anger isn't bad. God is the one who created emotions. It doesn't create bad things.
So you can have anger, you can have fear, you can have whatever they're not bad. They're just
telling you something. It's a form of communication, but they themselves aren't bad. So
think of, think of emotions like this. Emotions are God's built in way of communicating something
to you. So don't, don't reject them. They're, they're a beautiful way in which God is trying
to communicate something to you. He's trying to tell you the truth. It's like, this is what's
going on. This is what you're believing. You know, this is what you haven't accepted or whatever.
So think it, so your emotions are a way in which God is communicating something to you that you
have the opportunity to face because it's always an invitation by God to see that an area in which
you're in bondage and to invite you, wouldn't you like to be free? So if you'd like to be free,
you now see this emotion, let that thing up and out instead of stifling it. And then, and yeah,
in order to move into the freedom that the Lord has for you. Okay. Just going to mention some,
and I didn't really know how to, how to kind of categorize this, but think of it as kind of
some signs and some, some, some signs and symptoms that can give you a, I don't know,
just kind of like talk to you about, or give you a bit of a direction of, about, sorry,
I'm having a hard time articulating this, but give you a bit of direction of where you can find
where you're struggling with how you interact with your emotions or how your body, your emotion,
you are, are,
are not accepting your emotions.
And so that is when you feel too much or when you feel too little.
So let's first talk about feeling too much.
If you are easily overwhelmed, it means you are feeling a lot.
It means that you emotionally are holding what this is what I mean by that.
I mean that you're emotionally holding on to too much and it's bottling and it's not
coming up and out, but you're feeling a lot and you're holding it in.
It's not going down and it's not going out.
You're just it's it's a little bit like I think of it like what happens when you detox.
When you detox, remember that your that the toxins get released from like fat cells and
places it's been stored and then it drops it if if and then it puts it into the I remember
I think I remember this correctly.
I mean like the order in which this happens instead of going to that.
I think that in order to get to the digestive tract, it has to go into the bloodstream first
if I remember right.
So it gets dumped into the bloodstream and if it can't get out of the bloodstream through
the colon or through this wet glands fast enough the toxins sit in the bloodstream until
the body can then grab it and then like re-restore it as fat, you know, and the whole point of
like storing it as fat is it neutralizes toxin it'll hike hide it in a fat cell and
then keep it from being accessed and that's that acts like a buffer and keeps it from
being accessed and therefore keeps it from poisoning the body.
So anyway, if the talk while the toxins though don't have anywhere to go and they're just
like stuck they're not going out and then they're not being stored either.
In other words, they're not being stifled.
They're just sitting in the bloodstream and it's the same way our emotions are.
They're just sitting there and you feel sick.
So if y'all have gone through any if any like major detox program or whatever, you'll know
that when you go through detox, it will sometimes feel like you have the flu and it and certain
detox programs will tell you hey, look at this happen start backing off on the amount
of the detox like I don't know not a medicine and not a potion but you know, it be is to
stop it decrease and back off on the amount that that is that you've been given in order
to trigger a detox back off on the dosage.
So I'm trying to say is the dosage because it's saying that your body is trying to it's
it's been triggering your body to detox too fast or you have too much to detox and then
it's bringing too much too fast.
So let's say hey in order to allow your body to detox without you feeling so bad and without
releasing all that poison into your bloodstream to sit and to affect you.
Hey, let's let's just slow down the let's slow down the process a bit same thing with
our emotions if you are feeling emotionally over if you were feeling overwhelmed too easily
by things and you may not even know why especially if women were just like well, I say that you
know, I suppose men to you can just feel overwhelmed and you're not and you look at your situation
you're going.
I don't know.
Why is today any different or you know, sure I have was one extra thing to do or that someone
asked me to do this one extra thing and I just can't take what an extra thing it just
it's just too much.
But if you really think about it, you're you don't know why like why would that be overwhelming?
It's all it's going to take up is one hour.
Do I have an hour?
Yes, but just I just feel emotionally just overwhelmed or mentally overwhelmed.
It means that we are emotionally holding on to too many things all at once and not
properly dealing with them when meaning we're not properly facing them and dealing with
them and releasing them.
We're also not stifling them either.
We're not like just bearing down on them and just overcome and not overcoming them but
like squishing and down and stopping them, but you're not letting them out either.
And so they're just in this stuck position.
So that's an indication that there are some things about what it is that's going that
that you about your emotions that you're not dealing with.
It can indicate to you that you have emotions that you're not dealing with because you're
not letting them up and out or you're just feeding on them.
You're looking at them and maybe you can even articulate what's going on, but you're not
dealing with them.
You're not you're not choosing to let them go so you're keeping them but you're not stifling
them either.
So you're still feel them and then it and then so you add one more drop to the top of
the glass or you add one straw to the camel's back and boom, you just can't handle anymore.
Right?
And but but when you can't handle them anymore, you then act out because you're still not
choosing to release it.
You're just exploding, but you still keep all of those emotions because you're not properly
dealing with it.
So feeling
So sometimes when you're feeling a lot, that can be an indication or like, I don't know
how do I put that?
If you're feeling overwhelmed, let me just word it that way.
If you're feeling overwhelmed, it can be indicative that you have a lot of emotions that are,
that you're not properly dealing with.
You're holding onto too much at the same time.
And, or if you're not, if you're feeling too little, if you're, if you, and signs of this
can be things like you're having, you have a hard time celebrating.
We've been talking about that actually.
And if you have a hard time celebrating, if you have a hard time feeling joy, allowing
yourself to feel joy, or even if you know that you, some people are in certain times,
maybe something doesn't, you have such a hard time celebrating things that even when something
good happens, you don't get that excited about it.
You don't feel very hopeful about life and something and you, and you don't, sorry, trying
to figure out how to articulate this and it felt like I'm struggling a bit, things, good
things happening.
Don't trigger enough of an excitement and anticipation celebration, a joy or a happiness
in you.
You just simply don't feel it.
You don't mean to, to be stifling anything.
You don't mean to not be celebrating, but you just don't feel it.
It's like, I don't know, this doesn't feel that exciting to me, you know, or whatever.
Stuff like that can be an indication that you're stifling things that, and that you've
done it for so long that now your joy doesn't come up.
Even when it's being provided with a trigger, like a good trigger, it has a good prompt
and it just doesn't show up.
Sorry that all of these huge nets, you know, it's fall.
So all these huge nets are, Oh, falling off the tree.
And I think, I think it's because the squirrel up there is very busy.
He's harvesting for the winter, I guess.
So it can show that you're stifling and either denial, like not like you don't think that
good things are going to happen or that it really is a good thing or stifling and self-protection.
So you can either be actively doing that and not allowing yourself to celebrate and have
joy because you're concerned that, Oh my goodness, I'm just, what if I'm just waiting for the
other shoe to drop or the, or the gauntlet to it, but there's another phrase for that.
But, but this can also mean that sometimes you can experience the fact that you're not,
that when you have all of the right promptings and circumstances, your natural response is not
joy. It's like, it's not like you're, you're just not wanting to get too excited. It's that
you can't even try to get excited. You can't get excited. Even when you try kind of a thing,
that's an indication that there's that you have a long-term habit of stifling
and, and hiding aspects of yourself. Also, if you have a difficult time receiving,
you have a difficult time receiving love from people, gifts, compliments, good things,
or going to the negative. If you have a difficult time acknowledging just how bad something is,
how bad a past trauma was, how bad something affected you when your mom or your dad or your,
or your coworker or your sibling or your, your, your husband or your boyfriend or your whatever,
or even God, not acknowledging how much it hurt, how much, how it affected you,
and just trying to brush it off the, Oh, I should forgive. I should forget without fully
acknowledging it first, how it affected you. That is an, is another indication that you are
stifling things that, and you're not allowing yourself to know who it is. You are not allowing
yourself to face who it is. You are when you don't know or face who it is that you are,
then you stay enslaved. So remember that you can only experience that you can only experience.
I know that this might sound surprising, but because some people just feel like they experience
so much pain all the time, and they're just filled so overwhelmed by the pain and they don't feel
that they have enough joy and happiness. I know that what I'm about to say might sound surprising,
but what's actually true is that you can only, that when you're trying, when you stifle emotions,
when you're trying to stifle any emotion, like say for instance,
Anger, fear, purity, whatever, when you try to stifle it, you're stifling emotion.
You're not stifling that emotion.
You're stifling feeling altogether.
We think that we can, that we can just stifle feeling the negative things and we can allow
ourselves to feel all the positive.
You can't, it's not how it works.
When you stifle something and when you don't allow the fullness, if you don't allow yourself
to fully reveal who it is that you are, then all of you get stifled.
You're stifling emotion, not an emotion.
We think we're stifling an emotion, a particular one, and really you're stifling emotion, period.
You're stifling your ability to feel and you're not allowing your body or your soul, not allowing
it to fully express itself and to just show up as it is and what it's dealing with, and
which again, proves that we're not in a safe place for it.
Because if we don't deal with it, if our spirit doesn't deal with it, it has to, meaning like
the soul and the body has to, and the body doesn't know how to deal with those types
of things.
So it usually, especially for anything negative, goes into sickness.
Let's see.
Okay.
So basically you can only experience, you experience all emotions to the same degree.
So if you don't allow yourself to experience and to face pain, you won't be able to allow
yourself to fully experience joy, et cetera, because you're stifling emotion, period.
Kind of like, and I don't mean we're going to be like this when we allow our emotions
to finally come up and out and to actually face them.
But what it reminds me of is it reminds me of creatives that feel a lot, that have a
lot of emotions, and they're way up and then they're way down and whatever.
So think of what I'm talking about as, as like manifesting or picturing yourself.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I'm, I was, sorry, I was, a new text came in.
I don't usually have all of these texts, but a new text come in and it had the name of
someone that is in one of my programs, but it just happened to it, but they weren't talking
about that person, but I thought they were.
Oh my word.
So many of my programs is going through a major problem.
It wasn't, it was somebody else who shares the same name that makes me feel better.
Okay.
Sorry.
That's why it caught me off guard for a second.
I was like, wait a minute.
I'm here talking to people in this program.
And there was a, there was a text, but totally different person.
So now I completely forgot I was talking about, oh, but yeah, creative.
So anyway, maybe that'll give you a picture of, of how, of how we can actually see that
this is that this is true that you're, when you stifle and emotion, you actually stifling
all emotions because you have to be able to allow yourself to fully feel.
And whenever you fully feel, you'll fully feel pain, you'll fully feel joy, fully, fully
feel whatever, but understand that the, and this is what we're going to talk about next
is what to do when you fully feel all those things.
And in other words, how to change when you fully, we can be very afraid of fully feeling
and facing how angry that we are, because we don't want what we think that that's going
to mean our about ourselves to be true.
You know?
Oh my goodness.
You know, I'm in that much sin or I'm in that much, whatever that I, that my emotions are
showing that my unbelief is to that degree.
And I don't want to believe that about myself and that can, we can not want that.
And we can also not want our, we can also not want to actually feel the discomfort and
the pain of that, of anger or of, you know, of fear or, or disappointment or betrayal
or whatever.
I think there was one other thing I thought of just now while I was saying that one, oh,
we don't want to have to deal with it.
We feel that the more that we feel something, the more intensely that we feel it, it's going
to require more effort from us to deal with while F we nip it in the bed quick.
Well, then we don't have to deal.
It's, it's easier to deal with.
Don't take as much exertion and effort on our part.
If we nip it in the bed quick, then if we let it, let ourselves fully feel it.
Remember that when I'm saying that, that we need to allow
ourselves to fully feel something.
I'm not saying that, um, that you feed on it.
What I'm saying is, and this is about what we're about to talk about is you're
letting the fullness of what it is build to the point where it actually goes away,
where you actually let it go.
So it's no longer inside of you.
And it begins to actually, and the important thing about that is it will
begin to help you deal with the root cause of that emotion.
That's really what you're doing.
When you're allowing the fullness of that emotion to come up,
there is a way in which you're indirectly addressing.
Sorry.
I wish, let me see if I can.
Oh, sorry.
I was going to see if maybe I could, I can't, sorry.
I don't know how to turn.
Um, I don't know how to turn off my, uh, text so that they stopped dinging, um,
on the, on the call.
So I apologize.
But anyway, um, when you're indirectly, when you're allowing those emotions to,
to fully come up and to express themselves, there's an aspect of your, um, of your
unbelief that you are indirectly addressing.
You don't know that always what it is that you're doing, but you're setting your by
fully facing who it is that you are in fully accepting yourself unconditionally,
while you're making those, while you're making those particular choices of
unbelief and feeling, and your feelings are indicating that and all of that.
If you fully accept yourself while you're doing it, your body will then realize,
oh, okay.
So you re I really am a safe place with you.
You really are a safe place for me.
Therefore I can revert back to in default back to the original state in which God made me
in which I'm perfect.
And I don't need to fear.
I don't need to be afraid.
I don't need to be angry.
I'm naturally not threatened.
And you're proving that to me by being, by me being safe with you while I'm struggling
with that, actually being a truth or whatever, you know?
Um, so anyway, and if y'all have questions about that, let me know when we're on our
next, um, what do you call it?
We're on our next step.
Oh, this is what I can do.
I guess.
Um, when we're on our next call, uh, okay.
Yeah.
I remember.
Okay.
I think, I think I got it to stop to eat.
Okay.
But let me pull my notes back up.
So I apologize about that.
Okay.
So now how to actually stop and it still didn't do it.
That's such a bummer.
Um, how to stop, how to, how to change, how to basically overcome and how to get to know
yourself and process through all of these emotions, you know, um, because we've, there's
reason why we haven't allowed ourselves to fully feel them is because we're too afraid
of what's going to happen when we do.
So the very first thing that we need to stop that we need to do is what we talked about
last time is we need to stop denying or wishing away how we really feel.
So you chosen that you're fully going to accept yourself unconditionally.
Regardless.
Now the rubber meets the road.
You've got a feeling that either that needs to come up or has already come up and you
have to not judge yourself or judge your, your body or judge your soul.
Meaning like, think that they're bad, you know, and that they're evil and they just
need to cut it out.
And that they're this, you're this disrespectful and disobedient child or, or whatever you
need to actually love and accept it in those moments, even while you're afraid.
And it meaning like love and accept yourself, even while you're in those moments.
So stop denying or wishing away how you really feel.
Remember what we've talked about, you know, including, you know, even in faith, you can't
actually address something if you're denying that is even existing.
Right.
So don't deny it.
That's going to stifle it.
And it's not allow you're going to face, it's not going to allow you to face it.
And then you're not going to be able to let it go.
Um, for an example, and I'm, and I'm using an extreme one on purpose so that we understand,
you know, how far this goes.
If you're repulsed by, or don't trust someone that you meet or are friends with, accept
yourself and, and accept the fact that that's how you feel.
Remember when I say, except I'm talking about be a safe place of not judging yourself.
self while you feel that way.
You're not saying that it's good to feel that way.
You're not saying that it's based in reality about that person being bad.
We're not saying that we quote unquote should or shouldn't feel that way.
You're not, you're, you're releasing any should or shouldn'ts.
You're not saying it should be like this or it shouldn't be like that.
It just, you're accepting the fact that this is how I feel and this is what I'm experiencing.
This is how I'm responding.
In other words, this is coming up and out of me.
Fully accept that.
And here's the weird thing, fully connect with it.
I don't mean identify with it that on my word, this is who I am, this is how bad I know,
but I do mean fully connect with it and understand you made that choice.
You are believing something that is resulting in you feeling this way, feeling repulsed
by someone.
Maybe they smell bad.
Maybe they feel like they're very unlovable person.
I don't know.
You know, or you don't trust someone.
Don't get onto yourself.
Nick, I shouldn't be like that.
See, this is just wrong.
Acknowledge that.
No, that is coming up and out of me.
You don't know yet if it's based off of God's truth or not and you know that you should
or shouldn't be like that.
That's not what we're talking about yet.
That's not what we're addressing.
We can only address that later and you can't address it properly later unless you go through
this stage where you fully accept it about yourself.
You connect with and be a safe place for you to be that ugliness because what if it's based
on a lie or whatever, to be that ugliness while you're with yourself.
Don't reject that part of you while you're being that ugliness, while you're feeling
that way, while you're whatever, fully accept.
This is me feeling repulsed or feeling, you know, or, or, you know, not trusting so-and-so
or whatever.
You're not saying that you're going to stay like that.
You're acknowledging that that's, that's how you feel.
So it's the, again, our important, the important thing is getting to know who it is that we
are so that we can let the bad things out and then know who it is, what the good things
are that are also are going to be what express themselves.
It's not just the negative.
I'm talking about the negative because it's the negative that scares us.
And so often, but the positive itself, the positive as well, will start coming out.
Those are things like dreams, desires.
We'll be talking about that a lot more next time, but allow all of the things about yourself
to come up and acknowledge them and connect with them, realize, okay, I thought that I
feel that way.
I'm believing that don't reject it.
You can't deal with it.
If you've rejected it, if you've stifled it, if you denied it, then it can't, you can't
be dealt with it because you're just owning it and you don't have any power over something
you've disowned.
So if you want to deal with that, you're going to have to own it, realize, okay, this is,
this is a part of my domain.
My reality is something I need to face and it's truth.
We've got to accept that.
So, and then accept the truth, which is something I've already mentioned, accept the truth without
judgment.
This is what, this is how I feel.
That's the truth of it.
So I'm going to accept it without judging it.
Again, you're neutralizing.
You're not, you're not embracing it and building and, and you know, feeding it and giving into
it and all of that, but you're not rejecting either.
You're just going to neutral.
You're stopping thinking it shouldn't be this way and it should be different.
It just is what it is.
It is this way.
This is, this is reality.
It might be this reality instead of this reality, because remember your flesh is operating according
to this reality until it's overcome and transverse to spirit, right?
So while it's operating in unbelief in certain areas, well then this is the reality of it.
It's the only, it's only by facing it and not denying it, you can transit that you can
let it go.
That's what we're trying to do with those emotions and those beliefs is to let it go
so that we're choosing spirit instead, but you can't choose spirit while you're denying
this.
So accept it without judgment.
So don't try to deal with or change it before you accept yourself feeling that way because
you're not going to be able to deal with or change it until you accept yourself that you
are feeling that way.
Just the fact that this is how I'm feeling, this is just the truth.
And yes, this is me.
This is not someone else.
This is me.
I don't mean me, your identity, you know who it is that God says you are, but your body
and your soul are you as well.
And that is that body and that soul.
It made that decision and it is acting like that, right?
You have to.
And so you have to connect with it, not dissociate from it so that you can, um, is cause it's
only by owning it and it's, and realizing.
And owning your association with it, I was going to say claiming it, but owning your
association with it, that you can actually, that you have the authority to now deal with
it.
Don't have the authority to deal with it.
If you disowned it and denied it said, that's not mine.
That's not mine.
You know, then you've given up your authority over it.
And as it all just stick around, right.
And you will be out of control in that area of your life, even like you, you don't have
the authority to speak into it because you disowned it.
So what you're doing is you're accepting the truth and you're accepting the truth about
you.
This is how you feel.
This is how you've responded.
Now the other thing about, about change is that you have to go in order to change.
You have to go through it.
You can't avoid it.
Even Jesus think about the fact that how did he overcome death?
So it's the same thing with our emotions and that's what we're addressing.
So Jesus, when he did this with death, when he overcame death, he had to die.
Why is that a big deal?
And why did Paul talk about the resurrection being such a big deal?
Because he had to go through death and resurrect from it, which are supposed to not be able
to do with death, right?
And it resurrect from it, which proved that it didn't have control over him.
It not dying doesn't prove that it has no control over you.
It's only going through it and it not affecting you.
That proves that it has no control over you is the same thing.
And so that is the process of overcoming.
You have to go through the emotion.
So you have to go through the process of the emotion.
You have to ride the feelings, ride through it, go through it in order to let it pass.
This is just expressed and exemplified in so many different ways, including what I talk
about with, oh man, sorry, I don't know why all of a sudden I, I'll several times I've
been starting on it on to say something and then, and then it'll leave me and it's so
weird.
I'm like, Oh, it's like this, this is very unusual for me.
You know, that I had COVID a few weeks ago and I've been very tired.
I've been shocked at how tired I still am on earth is where I've been sleeping like
10, at least 10 hours a night, just going, Oh my word.
And I, I don't know if maybe it has something to do with that, if, if there, if I'm a brain
is lacking energy as well.
So I apologize.
Well, I guess it really doesn't, it doesn't matter.
I was just going to shoot it.
I was just getting connect the point that I just made to a point that I, that y'all
have heard me make in the rest intensive before.
And, and then just as I was about to say it, it, it left me.
So anyway, but yeah, so, so you have to, in order to go through in, in order to overcome
something, you have to go through it just like Jesus did.
So we have to go through our emotions.
That's what it was.
I was going to say, that's what it was.
Okay.
I was going to say that the fact that when you, that in order for something to be birthed
into manifest into creation, you have to go through chaos in rest.
You still go through the chaos, but you go through it in rest.
We keep thinking, and people get so excited about the rest intensive when they first started
thinking, Oh my goodness, I was just going to explain how I can avoid pain and suffering.
No, no, no, no.
It's how to overcome pain and suffering.
How do you overcome it?
By going through it in rest instead of turmoil and chaos, because what is pain and suffering
pain and suffering is the evidence of chaos, right?
It's very, it's very chaotic.
It's an aspect of the wages of sin being dead.
And it's a, it's a manifestation of what creation, different aspects of creation in our soul
and our body and, and, you know, creation outside of us is going through.
It's chaotic.
It is not in order.
It is not in alignment with God, right?
You go in order to change that chaos.
You move through it in rest and it brings it into order.
And then you birth something new on the other side.
It's not avoiding.
You can't create something by avoiding the chaos.
You have to face the chaos, go through it being unthreatened and unaffected because,
and not only that, but you bringing to it something.
It's not just going through it neutral.
You know, I'm not doing nothing.
No, no, no.
You actually have to bring something into it, which is rest.
So you're bringing life, your life giving spirit.
You're bringing rest into the situation and you're moving through the chaos,
not being affected by it, but in, and not being neutral to it, but rather being a,
and this is what we'll be talking about next time and owning yourself.
You're actually bringing your life, giving spirit into it.
And that is what birds something on the other side of it.
It's the same thing.
That's what we're doing here.
We're doing the same thing.
We are moving through chaos in rest.
All of your emotions are evidencing the fact that you're
in unbelief in a specific way.
So all of that is coming up and you move through it in rest, fully
acknowledging, accepting what, what, how it is that you're feeling and the
fact that you and associating with it and understanding, no, that's me.
That's making that decision, those decisions.
And I, I'm having some kind of a belief that is manifesting itself as fear or
as anger or as, you know, self-protection or whatever that is me, but who also am
I, and who's the higher me in other words, who's his spirit, the new creation,
the new man, who was perfect and who was going to bring order to the situation.
And, and the, and that is what you bring to it.
And that will allow you to go through the chaos of all of these
emotions coming up and out, and we'll allow you to release them because
you, you approach it as the son of God.
You know, as a son of God, who is the new creation, who is one with Christ,
who has all power and authority over this thing, and you are going to
triumph and it is not, and then it allows it to release.
Um, so you have to go through it.
So how do you go, uh, how do you, how do you go through it?
What does that mean?
Um, so I, I mentioned, you know, basically I think another phrase to
use is think of like, you're writing it.
You're, uh, you're riding a wave.
Um, you're riding the wave of the emotion.
You're allowing yourself, you're staying present while you feel all this stuff.
So it's allowing yourself to be present while, um, and in
experiencing those feelings.
You have to be present.
You can't just allow yourself to feel that way.
And then try to start thinking of other things or, Oh my goodness.
I can't wait till this is over or all.
No, you have to be present in it in order to actually be facing it.
You have to be a king over yourself while your emotion, while your
soul is experiencing the emotions.
Be present as that higher being of spirit while your soul
is going through all of this.
So allow yourself to be present while experiencing it.
That's the only way to actually face it.
Otherwise you're going to try to deny it or, or escape it by trying to emotionally
or mentally being somewhere else.
And you can't, and that won't actually deal with it.
You'll just, you'll just go through that whole feeling of like being stuck
and overwhelmed because there's all of this stuff that's in you.
That's making you feel sick because it's, you're not letting it go anywhere.
You're keeping it.
That's what's going to happen if you try to think about other things or
try to deny your feelings or whatever.
So the only way that you can do it is to move through it and rest.
It's the only way that you can let it come up and out without making you sick.
Um, and this is the only way to truly change, um, to, to truly let those
aspects of your emotions come out.
Um, and, and, uh, and the, and certain strongholds of your beliefs, what it is
that you're believing that's prompting all of those emotions, um, and so, and
yeah, you can't change it until you allow it all to come up and be, uh, to release.
Okay.
Last thing I wanted to say about the emotions for move on to decisions
is you need to own how you feel.
And I talked, I referenced this earlier, but the reason I wanted to mention it
here is your, is to give you an example of how this can, of how you can tell
whether or not you're owning your own decision and you're owning your own
emotions and remember, this is not accepting or agree, this is not agreeing
with your feelings or your beliefs, accepting yourself that is making those
decisions, accepting you're the soul.
And the body that is making those decisions is not the same thing as
agreeing with their, their decisions and agreeing with the beliefs that
those feelings are based in.
You're, you're not agreeing with it.
You're accepting the soul and the body that's making those decisions out of
fear, right?
So that it'll fit so that your soul and your body will feel safe enough to change.
Now, so this is an example I wanted to give, if you feel subject to other
people's decisions.
If you feel too affected by other people in your life and how they react to you,
how they respond to you, you know, and your feelings are too caught up in and
dictated by other people's decisions instead of owning it, um, and, and allow
it and, and you try to stifle how you feel in order to keep peace or, or
whatever, or maybe you're the opposite and you just lose control or whatever.
If you don't own your feelings, then even when you tell someone something like,
I want this, you try to be more honest.
You think about your emotions of I I'm wanting this in our relationship
or, um, I'm hurt when you do this, or I'm hurt when, uh, when you've said
this or I'm hurt when this happens, you know, healthy ways that we've been
taught are, are good, um, are a good way to be honest about our feelings
and to express them to someone else so that it can help resolve
relationship conflict, et cetera.
If you do not feel, if you have not taken ownership of how you feel and
know really who it is that you are, and you still feel subject to, if your
feelings are too easily swayed by how other people choose to live their life
and how other people choose to talk around you, then even when you're on it,
and when you try to be more open, transparent and honest about, Hey, you
know, and, and confronting things, Hey, this is what I'm really wanting.
I'm being honest with you.
This is what I want, or this is I'm hurt when this happens, even in
situation, even in, um, uh, in statements like that, you're not owning your own
feelings, so it can feel like you're owning your feelings because you're
being honest about it and you're acknowledging that they're, that they
exist, but acknowledging that they exist and owning them.
In other words, not disassociating from them and actually
claiming responsibility for them.
In other words, feeling, uh, if you don't do that, well, then even when
you're honest about your feelings, then you're not, you're still not, you're
still not owning them and other people still own you.
So I just wanted to point out that just because you're honest about your
feelings, even to yourself, like whether you're like, in other words, you're
acknowledging them, that is not this acknowledgement of your feelings.
This is, this is, sorry, this has taken me a while to explain because I
apologize because it's the first time I've ever actually taught on all of this.
Acknowledging your feelings is not the same thing as owning your feelings.
And, um, which, like I said, is the opposite of disassociating from them.
It's not the same thing.
And this only works.
Here's my whole point.
This only, this does, this cannot work.
You cannot change and really, and over and overcome and release your, your
emotions if you only acknowledge them, but you don't own them, you don't claim
responsibility for them, you know, as, as a spirit that is the King over the soul
and the body and is coming in to protect it and to heal it and to all of that.
If you do not take that position over yourself, well, then you can't release
or change the, your emotions and the beliefs that your emotions are founded in.
So, um, you'll notice that these statements will have, I want, and I get
hurt when you'll notice that they'll still, that those statements will still
blame others actions for your feelings and insist they take responsibility
for what you experienced.
Um, now I do believe that it's important if like, uh, you know, in relationships
that, that you can tell other people that, Hey, you struggle with in a specific way
when they say X, Y, and Z, and that hurts your feelings, but, and, and I do believe
that it's important, you know, as, as, uh, in relationships that we recognize
how, what we do affects other people.
Um, and that I think that it's important as much as, as possible and as much as
it's healthy, that the relationship needs to can, that people can kind of change
how they talk or how they interact with this or whatever, um, and, and to help us.
But it's not their responsibility.
They don't own the responsibility of how they're, what they said affected you.
Um, we own that responsibility.
This is how I felt.
I didn't like how, what I, what it brought up in me, but it's not so-and-so's
fault that that was.
my response, that I had that in me, you know, um, now I'm not saying that it means that you need to
stay in situations or in relationships where you're continually feeling, you know, triggered
by things. And it may mean that that person isn't doing anything wrong. And you're just very
sensitive because of wound genes, you still need to deal with. And then it can also, um, uh, but
I do think that in general, it's important for other people to, you know, to, for us to be honest
in relations to pay when you do this kind of thing, it hurts me or whatever. And then, so that
other person can know, but that other person can then choose how they want to respond. And then
you choose how you want to change how you, you, you can then decide how you want to then interact
with that person. Do you want to continue to be friends because we're going to continue to treat
you like that? Um, and for whatever reason, or, you know, and you'll just work on you or do you
not want to be, because you're like, no, this, this, this, um, dynamic no longer works for me.
So I'm not really addressing that to that. Um, but I just wanted to comment on it. Okay. Um,
and to show like how all of these emotions, um, uh, when we're getting to know ourselves,
when we're getting to know ourselves can, um, what questions that can come up in our relationships
with other people, um, as a result of us going through this process. Okay. Um, so the next thing
I want to talk about, and this one's going to be a lot shorter, uh, cause I just take the principles
that I talked about emotions and apply it to, um, the decisions. Now there's,
now I've written down decisions in various aspects of our life. So
how we can know ourselves by looking at the decisions that we've made,
that we're currently living the result or the consequences of, and by consequences,
I don't mean negative. I just mean, you know, results that we're currently living in or, uh,
and they can also, uh, we can also look at decisions that we are prone to make.
Now, like as there's the decision comes up and we haven't acted on it, we're like, Oh,
I'm thinking about doing this. So we can look at decisions that we've actually made and actions
that we've actually taken and getting to get to know ourselves. Oh, these are the types of
things that I normally decide. This is, this is the life that I'm in currently living.
You know, what does that then say about me? So how, how do you get to know yourself? Like based
off of how you're currently living and therefore, you know, Oh, you know, get to know yourself
based off of, well, this is what I've decided. And then you can do it going forward. When you,
as you make decisions like, Oh, these are the, this is the decision that I'm thinking about
making. What is that saying about me? You know, why am I making that decision? Because you're
always, you always make decisions, remember based on what you view as reality. So are you choosing
this reality or are you choosing this one? Your decision will show you, are you, which reality
are you giving the greatest authority to? Is it based off of fear and self-protection or is your
decision based off of faith, you know, and then your action therefore, right? So you look at
decisions that you make in, um, in your work or in your job. Think of how you're think of where
you currently are in your work or your job right now, and your attitudes towards it.
I say your attitudes towards it. I mean, think of. You're the current environment in which you're in
and whether or not that is how you want to live your life, not just going forward, but just now,
like, is it, is it healthy? Is it good? Does it show that you make what type of decisions?
Does it show that you make? And therefore from that, you can discern with the Lord.
What, why do I make those types of decisions? What's my reason for making that decision or
for having made that decision or whatever. So your work and your job, um, and, um, also your home,
like literally the home that you live in an apartment, a house or whatever you live with
someone, you know, you still live with your mom, you know, um, what is your current housing
situation and what is your home environment? Like that will tell you things about yourself.
I'll tell you about again, because it's all based off of decisions that you've made based
off of what you believe about who you are and what you deserve and how God sees you,
how you see you, et cetera. Right? So your job, your work, your job, your business,
your home and your home environment.
your physical possessions, what your, what possessions you own tell you about what you
believe about yourself, um, how, what you believe about your past and what you believe
about your future.
Um, this is, I'm going to just cover all of these really quick.
So this isn't just going to be real quick as well, but your, um, the, the thing, okay.
Think of it this way.
Things that you choose to surround yourself with tell you what you believe about yourself.
And I'll think of it this way.
When you look at certain things that you own, think about, and this, this is something that
I'd recommend that you do.
Look at a variety of types of things, like things you like, things you don't like or
whatever.
And think, um, and, oh, sorry, trying to think really quickly because I, you can do like
a whole really, I've always planned to do like a really big teaching on at some point,
like multiple session teaching on this.
So I'm trying to think of how to, how to compact it just really, um, for something just to
just summarize it really quick, but do you have that because why do you have that?
Do you have it because you, it makes you feel good about who it is that you are or a hope
of what you may do, what you want to do in the future?
Or are you holding on to something simply because you don't want it to go away?
Like does it, is it reflective?
Is this thing that you're holding on to, let's use that as an example, is this thing that
you're holding onto, you can't let go of?
Is it because it's reflective of who you are right now and what you want to be in your
life now and in the future?
Or is it that you just don't want to let it go?
You just don't want to, um, you don't want to be without it.
Um, that shows areas in which we're enslaved, enslaved to something because it's actually
not reflective of something positive that describes who it is that we are right now.
It's something about our past that we can't let go of and move, move on from.
Um, and, um, or you look at things like maybe that used to be hopes and dreams that you
had and you'll see that a lot of this in, uh, with, uh, that people hold onto with,
uh, books or sometimes like hobby paraphernalia that, I don't know what that would be, but
all kinds of things.
Um, and, and you're holding onto them because, and you, and they just, because you wish that
you could do that thing, but have, but have you noticed that you've had it for 10 years
and never done anything with it?
So is that really and truly who you are now?
And do you want to spend time on that thing?
Um, because it's, it brings you so much joy or, you know, do you have a hard time letting
it go?
Because you feel that it means that you've failed at doing something that you wanted
to do, but you're really not, uh, that you never give yourself the leeway and the permission
and the time to spend on it.
Like, so in other words, what are, what are all of the different things that you own saying
about you?
Do they say that you believe that you're worth, um, that you're worth quality things, or do
they say that you feel like you're only worth leftovers, you know, I don't know, just things
like that.
Uh, the last thing, um, of, of, uh, where we make decisions is our physical body.
So it's important that just like all of these other aspects of ourselves, that we love our
body unconditionally.
And even if it's evidencing some sickness, um, or if it has more weight on it, that we
want it, or we're not toned the way that we want it, or we don't have the strength, the
way that we want it or whatever, it's important that we love it unconditionally.
The way that, uh, the way that it is because it's simply expressing and putting into a
manifestation, what it is that we really feel about ourselves or what our soul believes
about ourselves, um, and accept it.
Even if it never changes how it's manifest, even if it never changes its fears, it struggles,
how it's manifesting, um, those fears and those struggles, et cetera, only then will
it feel safe enough to change.
And I've experienced this, other people have experienced this, um, and I I've literally
been able, I know this might sound surprising, but I've literally been able to shape my body
based off of what it is that I wanted it to look like, like just emotionally what I wanted
it to look like and how I saw it.
It began to shape itself like that.
Because, but I had to love myself as I was in order for my body to begin doing that.
I couldn't just like whip it into shape or something, you know, or be hard on it or like
hard on it emotionally or whatever.
And then, but because I loved it for what it was, and I wanted the best for it.
And I got excited about what it could look like or be, it began to form into shape in
that way.
And yes, I'm talking about more than simply losing weight.
I'm literally talking about it, shaping itself in particular ways, found fascinating.
Um, and, uh, let's see here.
Oh, I just wanted to mention this really quick, this, um, when your body is tired, that is
a way that is a, um, I'm going to put it, let's see.
Okay.
When you're, when your body is tired, your defenses are down.
Even when you're emotionally tired, your defenses are down and it's more easy for you to see
what it is that you truly are feeling and thinking about situations.
That's partly why at night, women have a tendency to want to talk about the heavy things.
There's the whole thing of like, well, kids are all in bed and we're just all by ourselves
and whatever.
But there's also an aspect of the fact that the, the distractions are gone and we feel
tired.
And so our, our, all of those, all of the busy-ness emotionally, mentally, physically,
that has been filling up all of this space is gone and, and all, and it's been like stifling
all of our emotions.
They're all gone.
And now how we really feel about things starts to come up.
And that's why we want to address them because they're now at the forefront.
Why?
Because we're tired.
Our defenses are down.
We're emotionally tired, physically tired, mentally tired, whatever.
So I just wanted to point that out.
Okay.
So last thing is the practices.
So I recommend two things.
No, no, no, I don't.
I want to do, no, no, no.
I do want to do this.
And I know we didn't talk about the dreams much, but I do want to put, give you two practices
and I'll mention the dream second dreams, meaning like desires, things that you want.
Cause remember when you get to know yourself, I know that I've talked a lot about, about
the negative.
We'll be talking even more about the positive next time, but I want to address the negative
because the negative is what we're afraid of.
That's why we don't want to know ourselves is either we're afraid of what we're going
to discover about ourselves or what, you know, all the negative stuff, or we're afraid
in what that, that could say or mean about us, you know, and then also we can be afraid
of what it is that we really want and desire because it's a good thing.
And we're afraid of being disappointed, right?
I'm afraid that, well, God's not going to let me have it.
He's going to say no and whatever.
So it's important that we choose that.
No, he is a good God.
And, and we, we need to allow ourselves to fully experience, not just the pain to come
up and out, but also experience all of the joy and all of the, and, and happiness.
And we need to fully, we need to allow, we need to actually experience this in our life
if we're actually going to, if, if we believe that it's true, if we have the faith that
these things that God says about himself and about us are true, then we have to live it.
We have to experience it.
And so we have to feel these feelings and allow them to come up and out.
And then we have to feel all the good feelings, you know, trusting that God is good.
So the very first practice is allow yourself to, to feel and to name your emotions as they
come up face that it is coming out of you and then go sit with God in the fullness of
the emotion.
Like even if you're angry, when I've been angry, I just, I fully allow myself to feel
all of the anger that I, that I feel about the situation and I'll be by my L and anyway,
what I did, what I did is I just got by myself with the Lord.
I was just angry and I allowed myself to fully feel the intensity of the anger.
And then I went to him and just sat in his presence.
In other words, I allowed God to be with me while I was feeling that angry.
And I just was literally, I felt like I was sitting in his presence as if his presence
is that he was sitting here and his presence was like this cloud or whatever that completely
filled me.
And I'm inside of him.
I'm inside of it, feeling all of these, what felt like to me, very sinful, negative, heavy
anger-filled emotions and
So I recommend that you do that that you do that with the good things that you do that with the negative things in
other words positive emotions you do that with the negative ones and
allow yourself to fully feel your to to fully accept yourself feeling that way and
See how God fully accepts you
While you're feeling that way and you'll notice some things you'll notice that saw that he won't correct you
He won't correct you until you change and say you need to stop that and whatever
He will allow you to feel that way while you're with him. Just like yeah, I understand you felt that way and
Then you'll find that just being with God while you feel that way and him not correcting you
The presence of God will change you the presence of God will heal you. It's
wild how that happens
But and so anyway, I would recommend that
Very very powerful
Personally, it felt like a very life-changing experience. So I've learned that it's not his correction through knowledge that changes me
but his presence
That changes me that will change those emotions that will loosen that stronghold and that that anchor, you know
To ourselves, I mean of that emotion in ourselves or that belief really that that that and
Emotion is founded in and it'll release that
So that's the first exercise the second exercise that I recommend is to dream things
think about think about things that you want to do or that you want to
That you want to be like or that you want your life to be like or whatever
And they could be big dreams they can be small dreams whatever sounds fun, you know dream those good things and then ask yourself
the seven layers of why
Be honest with yourself. Remember what we talked about and before about like dreaming in a sandbox with God. You're not making a decision
You're just playing you're like, oh, I wonder what it'd be like when we did this
I wonder if it would be like what it would be like if we do that and
And then ask yourself the seven layers of why ask. Okay. Why do I want that?
Well, I want it because this okay. Well, why is that important?
Why do I want that and then do that and ask yourself?
Why seven times and then you'll get to know you'll get to know yourself
You get to know what it is. You really want and why you want that how you're building your desires
What are they all based on and related to and determined by you know, etc
so I hope that and today has been helpful and it's given y'all and food for thought and
And so please go through these those practices because I've actually even baked some practices into
The actual teaching itself when I was telling you, you know, hey, these are the things that you do whenever you encounter your emotions
Positive or negative ones, you know allow yourself to fully fill them
Because I think you'll have questions
As you have questions come up you let know and I will get back to y'all get to talk to y'all