WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:12.760 Hey, oh, my gosh, it looks so beautiful where you're at. 2 00:00:12.760 --> 00:00:17.400 No, thanks. It is. It's very pretty day. 3 00:00:17.400 --> 00:00:22.960 It's really, really pretty. 4 00:00:22.960 --> 00:00:32.840 I don't know what temperature it is. It's probably in the 70s, it's in the 60s, I don't 5 00:00:32.840 --> 00:00:37.360 know, advantage of the really nice weather. We live in a studio apartment and he works 6 00:00:37.360 --> 00:00:43.560 from home and so it's helpful. It's been helpful in the summer whenever he and I both have 7 00:00:43.560 --> 00:00:48.400 phone calls. One could be inside and one could be outside and we're really not sure how it's 8 00:00:48.400 --> 00:00:52.720 in the winter. That's okay. We'll figure it out. 9 00:00:52.720 --> 00:00:58.520 You'll figure it out. No, it looks very beautiful. It's like, it's like summer and fall because 10 00:00:58.520 --> 00:01:01.080 it's like the beautiful flowers. 11 00:01:01.080 --> 00:01:08.200 Yeah. Oh, they're really pretty. I am very grateful that the flowers are still blooming 12 00:01:08.200 --> 00:01:13.560 really well. They're very happy. And, and I already know what I'm going to replace them 13 00:01:13.560 --> 00:01:18.960 with in the winter. I think I'm going to take this one here, this one, I'm going to 14 00:01:18.960 --> 00:01:23.440 uproot it and then I'm going to move it inside because I have a grow lamp that Ed gave me 15 00:01:23.440 --> 00:01:29.720 for, I think it was for my birthday. Was it for my birthday? It was for my birthday or 16 00:01:29.720 --> 00:01:34.880 for our anniversary. Maybe it was for my birthday. Anyway, I have a grow lamp in there so I can 17 00:01:34.880 --> 00:01:39.200 grow stuff even in the winter, which I'm very excited about. So I can have, so far I'm able 18 00:01:39.200 --> 00:01:46.480 to, I have some, some of these that I already have cut off and are growing into new, like 19 00:01:46.480 --> 00:01:50.600 they've grown their own plants, their own roots and they're doing fine in the grow lamp. 20 00:01:50.600 --> 00:01:54.360 So I'm hoping that when I uproot this, when it gets too cold and I uproot this and put 21 00:01:54.360 --> 00:02:00.240 it in there that I'll have flowers all winter. So I'm excited about that. Anyway, and then 22 00:02:00.240 --> 00:02:03.280 I'm going to replace all of these because these are all just annuals. I'm going to replace 23 00:02:03.280 --> 00:02:09.080 them all with, it's a winter flower. I don't remember what it's called. It's not a pansy. 24 00:02:09.080 --> 00:02:18.640 It's, it starts with the C, but they're really big, vibrant colored flowers. And I thought 25 00:02:18.640 --> 00:02:23.640 those would be really cheerful for the winter. So anyway, so I plan to do that. 26 00:02:23.640 --> 00:02:32.120 But in the meantime, I'm into it. It's October and I'll have flowers. Yeah. Oh, it's looks 27 00:02:32.280 --> 00:02:39.800 for you. I'm, I'm good. Yeah. I've been at this investment conference this evening, 28 00:02:39.800 --> 00:02:44.680 so that's why I was late. So that was, yeah, it's very interesting. It's, 29 00:02:48.200 --> 00:02:54.120 I'm, so that's why I was just like, oh, I had to get this so cold here now. And it's like, 30 00:02:54.120 --> 00:02:59.160 so windy. So I'm like, oh, it's just going to be like, probably not nice to listen to if I like 31 00:02:59.160 --> 00:03:04.440 walk in the wind. So I'm like, no, I'm just going to wait until I'm home. But yeah, it was 32 00:03:04.440 --> 00:03:09.720 interesting. I was, I was trying to think what you were saying, like, oh, hey, we actually have 33 00:03:09.720 --> 00:03:17.800 dominion over this and God, like, what are you wanting me to understand from this? And that was 34 00:03:17.800 --> 00:03:27.560 just kind of, yeah. So what's been interesting is that so yesterday, I was with 35 00:03:29.160 --> 00:03:34.360 remember my colleague, that's my friend where there was that misunderstanding. And then I just 36 00:03:34.360 --> 00:03:42.200 felt horrible because they didn't give her like the full pay. Because I don't know, I feel like 37 00:03:42.200 --> 00:03:48.920 I pretty much feel like my boss and her boss kind of threw me under the bus, because they want so 38 00:03:48.920 --> 00:03:55.240 they kind of they didn't they didn't give her a full race. But then they pegged it on the fact that 39 00:03:55.960 --> 00:04:00.840 they said, Oh, you're not sharing information with me. And I was like, 40 00:04:02.280 --> 00:04:06.440 but I'm okay with how we're Yeah, you know what I mean? So I was like, nobody asked me, 41 00:04:07.320 --> 00:04:15.160 you know, and so I'm like, Oh, that's just doesn't seem right. But oh, well, so anyways, 42 00:04:15.160 --> 00:04:21.480 we were at like a work arrangement. And then we were going to go be social at this other event. 43 00:04:22.200 --> 00:04:27.560 And she's like, Oh, I can't go. And I thought she said she was gonna go meet, like her friend's 44 00:04:27.560 --> 00:04:32.200 husband or something. And I was like, Oh, where are you meeting him in town? And she's like, 45 00:04:32.200 --> 00:04:38.600 No, no. And then it turned out she wasn't meeting her friend's husband at all. She had signed up 46 00:04:38.600 --> 00:04:45.640 for this like, course, if you want to be an entrepreneur. Uh huh. And so I was like, Oh, 47 00:04:45.640 --> 00:04:50.680 well, that's interesting. She's like, Oh, do you want to go? And I was like, Sure, why not? So I 48 00:04:50.760 --> 00:04:56.360 literally signed up like the last minute. And so we both went to this like entrepreneur thing. 49 00:04:57.400 --> 00:04:59.960 And then I had signed up to go with my sister to this 50 00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:05.320 seminar today, it's a bank that holds it every year, because so 51 00:05:05.320 --> 00:05:09.640 what they're trying to do, they just want to have a focus on the 52 00:05:09.640 --> 00:05:14.440 fact that I mean, and all over the world, but their focus is on 53 00:05:14.440 --> 00:05:18.640 Norway, obviously, where it's just like, the gap between 54 00:05:18.640 --> 00:05:22.320 female investors and male investors are like too big, and 55 00:05:22.320 --> 00:05:25.520 like female founders and male founders. And so they just want 56 00:05:25.520 --> 00:05:29.480 to create awareness. And they're like, hey, we need good role 57 00:05:29.480 --> 00:05:32.440 models. And we need more people to like, step up and try to do 58 00:05:32.440 --> 00:05:38.800 this. And like, so they're pretty much just, they started 59 00:05:38.800 --> 00:05:43.520 this hashtag, she invests. And it's become this, like a viral 60 00:05:43.520 --> 00:05:46.520 thing. And now, you know, women are starting to invest. And it's 61 00:05:46.520 --> 00:05:51.040 like, yeah, so it's really great. And then she had signed 62 00:05:51.040 --> 00:05:53.720 up as well. And then this year, because I went last year, and 63 00:05:53.720 --> 00:05:56.160 then this year, they're like, Oh, yeah. And so we want to have 64 00:05:56.160 --> 00:06:00.320 a focus on entrepreneurs also this year. So they were like, 65 00:06:00.320 --> 00:06:03.640 giving out books on like, if you want to start your own business, 66 00:06:03.640 --> 00:06:06.640 you know, like, and here's our card, like, here's this book, 67 00:06:06.640 --> 00:06:09.520 like, read this book and connect with us. And so I was like, I 68 00:06:09.520 --> 00:06:14.640 was telling her, I was like, I guess there's a theme. So I just 69 00:06:14.640 --> 00:06:17.800 feel like, it's just interesting. So I'm just trying 70 00:06:17.800 --> 00:06:25.160 to learn, I feel like it feels like a gentle nudge. You know 71 00:06:25.160 --> 00:06:27.480 what I mean? Where it's just like, hey, you can learn about 72 00:06:27.480 --> 00:06:32.360 this and see where you want to go. And so I think it's, yeah, 73 00:06:32.360 --> 00:06:37.200 it's, I'm still where I'm at, like, I'm still in the last week 74 00:06:37.200 --> 00:06:40.160 of, you know, like, next Wednesday is the final date for 75 00:06:40.160 --> 00:06:46.960 like, the possibility to appeal and then hopefully, you know, it 76 00:06:46.960 --> 00:06:51.000 will stand as it stands and be over. And then I went to a 77 00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:57.200 conference today during the day for my job with my former job. 78 00:06:57.680 --> 00:07:01.480 And so I could feel I was like, Oh, this feels like home. And I 79 00:07:01.480 --> 00:07:04.640 kind of want to go back. And then I was like, Oh, it's so 80 00:07:04.640 --> 00:07:08.080 sad, because it's so safe. And I want to go back. But I don't 81 00:07:08.080 --> 00:07:11.720 think I'm supposed to, you know, and you know, that thing where 82 00:07:11.720 --> 00:07:15.680 it's like, you've outgrown the jacket, but you kind of just 83 00:07:15.680 --> 00:07:20.440 want to be there because just so nice. Yeah, you know? Yeah, 84 00:07:20.440 --> 00:07:26.640 yeah. So I feel like I'm in this. I don't know, I feel 85 00:07:26.640 --> 00:07:30.840 today's been a journey of like, where I am presently and like, 86 00:07:30.880 --> 00:07:34.600 looking back at where I was, and then also like having a look 87 00:07:34.600 --> 00:07:38.240 into the future. And it's, I don't know if it's, I don't know 88 00:07:38.240 --> 00:07:40.720 if it's kind of like, hey, what do you want? You know, like, do 89 00:07:40.720 --> 00:07:43.200 you want to stay? Do you want to go back? Do you want to do this 90 00:07:43.200 --> 00:07:48.760 new awesome thing? Like, um, I have no idea. You know what I 91 00:07:48.760 --> 00:07:51.840 mean? I think I obviously want to probably do the new awesome 92 00:07:51.840 --> 00:07:58.000 thing, but it's going to be more scary than going back. So yeah. 93 00:07:58.360 --> 00:08:02.960 Yeah. So I think, I think that's, that's where I'm at. And 94 00:08:02.960 --> 00:08:05.480 I'm super excited to like, listen to the new teaching. I 95 00:08:05.480 --> 00:08:08.200 haven't gotten a chance to to listen to it yet. 96 00:08:08.720 --> 00:08:12.840 I had done it yesterday, and then I forgot to upload it. So I 97 00:08:12.840 --> 00:08:17.200 uploaded it today. And that is really, really exciting. I like 98 00:08:17.200 --> 00:08:24.880 how you noticed that it was you were getting Oh, what's the 99 00:08:24.880 --> 00:08:27.200 word? I don't know why I'm struggling. You'll notice in the 100 00:08:27.200 --> 00:08:30.480 in the teaching yesterday, it's well that my mind that I was 101 00:08:30.480 --> 00:08:33.960 really struggling with finding words that I was looking for 102 00:08:33.960 --> 00:08:41.640 whatever that this much. No, it's the words, not association, 103 00:08:41.679 --> 00:08:45.680 but basically the connection that you're making past. And 104 00:08:45.680 --> 00:08:48.720 then the fact that you are, you know, where it is that you are 105 00:08:48.720 --> 00:08:51.760 right now, you're kind of like, think of it as transition or 106 00:08:51.760 --> 00:08:54.800 crossroads or whatever. And then not to mention the fact that 107 00:08:54.800 --> 00:08:57.880 you're in your current job, and then looking in and being 108 00:08:57.880 --> 00:09:00.760 presented with and getting exposure to the possibilities in 109 00:09:00.760 --> 00:09:04.920 the future, all in the same day, which, which is hard to do. So I 110 00:09:04.920 --> 00:09:08.120 think that that's really, really cool. I think that's great. 111 00:09:08.120 --> 00:09:12.240 Because I just see personally, I just see that as the Lord being 112 00:09:12.240 --> 00:09:19.440 all over it, of you having sought him for, you know, to 113 00:09:19.480 --> 00:09:22.800 have your current certain aspects of your current 114 00:09:22.800 --> 00:09:26.040 situation addressed, and how he sees you where you're going to 115 00:09:26.040 --> 00:09:29.480 go and all that. And then also looking at, okay, well, what does 116 00:09:29.480 --> 00:09:31.960 that mean that we're going to go Lord, you know, could we have 117 00:09:31.960 --> 00:09:35.240 direction and but then him also pointing towards the past of 118 00:09:35.240 --> 00:09:39.080 like, hey, this is where you've been. And you've talked to me 119 00:09:39.080 --> 00:09:42.240 about wanting to go back. But and then there's this 120 00:09:42.240 --> 00:09:46.640 possibility here. And so it'll be it'll be fun to see where the 121 00:09:46.640 --> 00:09:51.240 Lord what the Lord does because of today, you know, but it's a 122 00:09:51.240 --> 00:09:56.200 neat, like, like you said, nudge communication from the Lord from 123 00:09:56.200 --> 00:09:59.440 heaven to you today, almost like an acknowledgement of the things 124 00:09:59.440 --> 00:09:59.840 that you've been 125 00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:05.440 before. And that's what I'm trying to say. Knowledge of the things before him, which I believe are also 126 00:10:05.440 --> 00:10:12.080 some of the stuff that rises up within us are in, are triggered by the Lord, prompting things. 127 00:10:12.080 --> 00:10:16.160 He's putting seeds in us. He's getting us to think about things or whatever. And we think that there 128 00:10:16.160 --> 00:10:20.480 are desires that we're coming up with on our own. And some of those are things that God is like, 129 00:10:20.480 --> 00:10:26.160 prompting us to think about, or to explore, to be interested in or whatever, but it just, 130 00:10:26.240 --> 00:10:29.840 and then you just get to go on this journey with him. Like, okay, Lord. So I'm in the middle of 131 00:10:29.840 --> 00:10:34.160 a journey. Where are we going? What are we doing? And in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy who you 132 00:10:34.160 --> 00:10:41.600 and I are right now in this, in this moment, and just enjoy the, the adventure of the fact that 133 00:10:41.600 --> 00:10:46.880 we're exploring right now. And I don't know what's going to lead to et cetera. So anyway, I think 134 00:10:46.880 --> 00:10:52.720 it's very exciting. I think it's like give it, it's an, it's a measure of breakthrough in the 135 00:10:52.720 --> 00:11:00.240 fact that there is God's communicating that you're not communicating to in a way that you can 136 00:11:00.240 --> 00:11:07.840 take as, okay, I'm really not stuck talking. He's doing stuff. He's presenting things. It's just 137 00:11:07.840 --> 00:11:13.440 that I'm not seeing the manifestation yet. I don't know where it's going to lead, but it's letting 138 00:11:13.440 --> 00:11:19.760 you know, that feels a lot like being stuck really isn't stuck. It's like, no things are moving. 139 00:11:19.760 --> 00:11:24.720 And so I think that's great. You're excited for you. Yeah. It's super exciting. And it's like, 140 00:11:24.720 --> 00:11:30.240 and even the people that were there tonight, you know, it's like, Oh, it's just the fulfillment 141 00:11:30.240 --> 00:11:36.080 of like having your own business. And then you can start hiring people. Like she had hired people or 142 00:11:36.080 --> 00:11:40.960 whatever. And I'm like, Oh, that's kind of scary. But it was like, it was all these like different, 143 00:11:42.080 --> 00:11:48.640 I don't know. Yeah. It made me think big, but I was like, Oh God, like I would, I would love that. 144 00:11:48.640 --> 00:11:52.880 But like, you would have to show me like, that would have to be your idea. Like you need to be 145 00:11:52.880 --> 00:11:57.600 the CEO of this, you need to be like the investor thing. Oh, and then I've been wondering, like, 146 00:11:57.600 --> 00:12:02.960 Oh, should I change my bank? And then all of a sudden, there's this guy that I used to work with 147 00:12:02.960 --> 00:12:06.800 before. And he's like, Oh, hey, I thought it was you. And so he's the assistant manager at the 148 00:12:06.800 --> 00:12:12.080 bank. And so he's like, Oh, hey, I'll call you next week. And I'm like, Oh, cool. Okay, so I'm 149 00:12:12.080 --> 00:12:17.600 going to call him next week. And I have that meeting with that other guy tomorrow with a 150 00:12:18.080 --> 00:12:25.600 record recording thing. And I don't know, just a lot of different things being kind of thrown 151 00:12:25.600 --> 00:12:33.840 up in the air. I feel like for me to explore and just like, I don't I feel super at peace. And I'm 152 00:12:33.840 --> 00:12:40.720 not like, it's this interesting place where I'm like, Oh, I can start to see kind of creative 153 00:12:40.720 --> 00:12:46.160 things that I can do at my work where I am right now. And then when I met all my former colleagues, 154 00:12:46.160 --> 00:12:50.640 I was like, Oh, I really love them. Like, they're great. And then I was like, Oh, I think it's 155 00:12:50.640 --> 00:12:55.600 gonna be something completely different. And I can't see it. And it's fine. I just fully trust 156 00:12:55.600 --> 00:13:02.000 God. And there's no rush in it. You know, I'm just like, it's fine. It's great. I don't need 157 00:13:02.000 --> 00:13:08.320 to have like, a timeline on it or be like, Oh my gosh, I need to like quit my job by this time or 158 00:13:09.120 --> 00:13:14.480 and at the same time, I'm super transparent to have my job where I'm like, I don't know if this 159 00:13:14.480 --> 00:13:18.240 is for me, you know, and that's just I mean, it's not to be negative, because I don't feel like I'm 160 00:13:18.240 --> 00:13:23.760 negative. But it's also I want to be like, just honest and transparent, you know, where it's like, 161 00:13:25.120 --> 00:13:30.000 because I'm not scared of like, losing my job. You know what I mean? Like, I'm like, it's 162 00:13:31.200 --> 00:13:36.240 Yeah, so I'm just and it's being sold anyways, probably by the end of the year. So I'm just like, 163 00:13:36.320 --> 00:13:42.080 it's all these things that I'm just that would stress me out before where I just feel super at 164 00:13:42.080 --> 00:13:47.680 peace. So that feels like breakthrough. And I've been working out every single morning this week, 165 00:13:48.320 --> 00:13:53.520 at six in the morning. And I mean, I've been thinking about this since forever. Well, 166 00:13:53.520 --> 00:13:59.360 615 probably, but it's like, I've been doing it and it's felt effortless. Right? Like, 167 00:13:59.360 --> 00:14:03.440 yeah, it's been like, not hard to get up at all. It's been like, 168 00:14:04.000 --> 00:14:08.000 I mean, obviously, I've been like sweating and like, you know, like, but it hasn't felt 169 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:16.560 like, I don't know, it felt like, when I started at the last time, like way back when, and it was 170 00:14:16.560 --> 00:14:23.040 my, my neighbor, then that kind of dragged me into it the last time too. And we were just literally 171 00:14:23.040 --> 00:14:27.680 talking the other day. And she was like, Oh, hey, I'm doing the Kayla prop program again. 172 00:14:28.400 --> 00:14:32.240 It's like, Oh, I should probably do that again. She's like, I'm on week three. I was like, 173 00:14:32.240 --> 00:14:35.920 I'm on week three. I was like, you know what, I'm just gonna go on with week three with you. 174 00:14:35.920 --> 00:14:39.760 I'm not going to do the whole like beginning week 123. And then start in week one, two, 175 00:14:39.760 --> 00:14:45.680 I'm just going to go straight on week three, and get on the program with you. And it's worked so 176 00:14:45.680 --> 00:14:50.960 great. This is what happened. So all this week, I've been like working out in the morning of 177 00:14:50.960 --> 00:14:55.920 getting all of my steps in and I was like, Oh my gosh, I'm like getting a routine and like this is 178 00:14:55.920 --> 00:14:59.920 you know, yeah, so it's been so that's been really 179 00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:04.020 good. What do you think difference or whatever that it 180 00:15:04.020 --> 00:15:06.180 now feels effortless? And you're just like, Oh, my word, I'm just 181 00:15:06.180 --> 00:15:07.260 doing it. What do you think? 182 00:15:08.700 --> 00:15:12.180 I mean, probably because I like you said, like, I stopped 183 00:15:12.180 --> 00:15:17.760 stressing about it, like, or putting like pressure on. I need 184 00:15:17.760 --> 00:15:21.220 to do this, like, you know, like, because it's, it's no 185 00:15:21.220 --> 00:15:26.460 longer to like, I don't know, I don't know that I can explain it 186 00:15:26.460 --> 00:15:30.360 even, you know, because, but I, obviously, I want to get in 187 00:15:30.360 --> 00:15:33.060 shape and lose weight. But I feel like that hasn't been my 188 00:15:33.060 --> 00:15:36.660 focus. The focus has been more like, it just fell in my lap. 189 00:15:36.660 --> 00:15:38.860 And I'm like, Oh, I'm just gonna do it kind of like how I 190 00:15:38.860 --> 00:15:42.620 started with swimming, like, don't think just do it's like, 191 00:15:42.620 --> 00:15:45.540 Nope, this is what we're doing now. And I think it's the whole 192 00:15:45.540 --> 00:15:49.900 from last week when we talked about when I got nudged by Holy 193 00:15:49.900 --> 00:15:52.300 Spirit to be like, Hey, yeah, it's great that you accept 194 00:15:52.300 --> 00:15:56.140 yourself. But remember, you have dominion over your own kingdom 195 00:15:56.140 --> 00:15:59.380 and you're meaning your own body. Yeah. And so you actually 196 00:15:59.380 --> 00:16:04.420 have to, like, do what's good for it. Yeah, that was like, Oh, 197 00:16:04.420 --> 00:16:07.940 what can I do? It's like, I can stop eating candy. And I can 198 00:16:07.940 --> 00:16:11.100 start working out, you know, like, like, get in that routine. 199 00:16:11.100 --> 00:16:15.900 Like, I can take authority. Yeah. And make good decisions 200 00:16:15.900 --> 00:16:20.900 instead of being a victim. Yeah, I felt like I was like a victim. 201 00:16:20.940 --> 00:16:23.980 And then I had the realization from one of the your teachings 202 00:16:23.980 --> 00:16:27.220 where I was like, Oh, I have dominion. Like, I need to take 203 00:16:27.220 --> 00:16:34.540 ownership over my life. And then I went from that to like, oh, I 204 00:16:34.540 --> 00:16:37.580 need to accept everything. And then when I accepted, I think 205 00:16:37.580 --> 00:16:40.420 part of me kind of went back into victim mode, where it's 206 00:16:40.420 --> 00:16:43.380 like, Oh, well, now I can just eat and do everything because I 207 00:16:43.420 --> 00:16:46.940 you know, you know, I need to accept myself and love myself. 208 00:16:47.300 --> 00:16:49.820 And then I was like, Yeah, that's great. And Holy Spirit 209 00:16:49.820 --> 00:16:53.540 is like, No, remember, like the whole dominion, like you need to 210 00:16:53.540 --> 00:16:58.580 like, also do that. Yeah. And so maybe it's the merging of the 211 00:16:58.580 --> 00:17:03.220 two. It's like the two coming together. And then and then it 212 00:17:03.220 --> 00:17:08.339 just is fine. Yeah. So I still need to like get a good routine 213 00:17:08.339 --> 00:17:10.780 in with the eating and everything. But it hasn't been 214 00:17:10.780 --> 00:17:15.460 bad. There hasn't been like, candy or things like this. So 215 00:17:15.460 --> 00:17:19.140 that's been good. But I still have like the routine, but one 216 00:17:19.140 --> 00:17:21.940 step at a time. Yeah, yeah. 217 00:17:22.140 --> 00:17:24.780 It's a you're making a life change, because you're making a 218 00:17:24.780 --> 00:17:29.660 different lifestyle choice. It's like, no, I'm redesigning what I 219 00:17:29.660 --> 00:17:35.020 want my life to look like, like who I want to be. I think about 220 00:17:35.020 --> 00:17:37.540 that sometimes when I think about especially my 221 00:17:37.540 --> 00:17:40.060 interactions, like say, for instance, with other people, 222 00:17:40.260 --> 00:17:42.860 like, I'm like, this is the kind of person I want to be, I want 223 00:17:42.860 --> 00:17:45.260 to be the kind of person that these types of things for 224 00:17:45.260 --> 00:17:48.540 people, you know, that meets this type of a need or this type 225 00:17:48.540 --> 00:17:51.740 of a loves on them in this type of a way that they get to 226 00:17:51.740 --> 00:17:54.820 receive this kind of thing. I want to be that kind of person. 227 00:17:55.020 --> 00:17:59.300 And anyway, so I think of it as something similar, similar to 228 00:17:59.300 --> 00:18:03.220 that of like, this is this is how I want to design my life, 229 00:18:03.380 --> 00:18:07.020 you know, and how I interact with creation. This is what I 230 00:18:07.140 --> 00:18:10.140 look like, you know, this is what I want my home environment 231 00:18:10.140 --> 00:18:14.140 to look like, this is how I want my health to look like, this is 232 00:18:14.140 --> 00:18:16.700 how I want to feel this is what I in other words, this is what I 233 00:18:16.700 --> 00:18:21.380 want to create for myself, as opposed to, as opposed to 234 00:18:21.380 --> 00:18:25.020 thinking, well, you know, this is what I want to do, I want to 235 00:18:25.020 --> 00:18:29.380 eat all of this stuff. But the way that God made the my body, 236 00:18:29.380 --> 00:18:32.900 my body won't let me do that. And oh, my gosh, victim to our 237 00:18:32.900 --> 00:18:36.460 body, or whatever, like, well, the laws won't let me do that 238 00:18:36.460 --> 00:18:39.540 the laws of physics won't let me do that. And this is such a 239 00:18:39.540 --> 00:18:43.940 drag. And like something's being imposed on us instead of like, 240 00:18:43.940 --> 00:18:47.900 No, this is the way things work. So because the things work like 241 00:18:47.900 --> 00:18:51.100 this, what kind of a life do I want to have? Who do I want to 242 00:18:51.100 --> 00:18:54.700 be? What do I, you know, how do I express and what I believe 243 00:18:54.700 --> 00:19:00.420 comes through that is who it is that we are being expressed? Who 244 00:19:00.420 --> 00:19:05.420 do I want to be like, in other words, who what do I value? And 245 00:19:05.420 --> 00:19:09.980 therefore, whatever we value, that's what we use as our reason 246 00:19:10.020 --> 00:19:13.540 and our motivation to design our life in a particular way. Because 247 00:19:13.540 --> 00:19:19.020 that's what we value this type of experience, or this type of an 248 00:19:19.060 --> 00:19:23.180 interaction or an interchange from us to an aspect of 249 00:19:23.180 --> 00:19:25.620 creation, like this is how we want to give life. This is the 250 00:19:25.620 --> 00:19:29.020 type of law that we want to give like life giving spirit, this 251 00:19:29.020 --> 00:19:31.340 type of life that we want to give, we want to give it in this 252 00:19:31.340 --> 00:19:34.140 way, you know, etc. And then like you said, it's very 253 00:19:34.140 --> 00:19:37.740 empowering position to be able to live life as opposed to, I 254 00:19:37.740 --> 00:19:43.100 have to get up. I mean, you know, at six or 16, I have to 255 00:19:43.100 --> 00:19:46.460 exercise, you know, because I want this other thing. And 256 00:19:46.460 --> 00:19:50.260 therefore, you know, yeah, let me do it and let the laws are 257 00:19:50.260 --> 00:19:54.740 making me do this, you know, and instead of looking at it like 258 00:19:54.740 --> 00:19:56.740 that, or even looking at ourselves from a victim 259 00:19:56.740 --> 00:20:00.060 mentality, with God, God's making. 260 00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:06.400 Yeah. Instead of that saying, no, no, we really are empowered. We get to choose. Do we want to 261 00:20:06.400 --> 00:20:10.400 partner with this? What kind of a life do we want to create between us and the Lord? I think that's 262 00:20:10.400 --> 00:20:15.600 great. I'm so excited for you. I'm so excited. I was like, oh my gosh, I can't believe how 263 00:20:16.160 --> 00:20:21.520 easy it's been like this week, you know? And, and so my friend that I usually go with, she's like, 264 00:20:21.520 --> 00:20:25.920 she texted me, she's like, oh, I won't be able to do it tomorrow. Cause I'm getting home late. 265 00:20:25.920 --> 00:20:33.680 And I was like, that's fine. Like I'll be able to do that. Like by myself, like this is day five, 266 00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:41.520 like I've got this. It's good. It's not like linked to anyone else or like, yeah. And like you said, 267 00:20:41.520 --> 00:20:45.680 it's not like, oh, because I have to, cause I feel like that was the last time it was like, 268 00:20:45.680 --> 00:20:50.800 I need to, I need to do this life change. I'm going to, you know, I'm going to weigh all my 269 00:20:50.800 --> 00:20:54.880 food and I'm going to count all my calories and we're going to do this thing. And now it's just 270 00:20:54.880 --> 00:21:04.240 like, no, it's good for my body to move. Like, it's good for my body to, you know, have like 271 00:21:04.240 --> 00:21:08.800 work on its strength. Like that's how we were created. And it's like, I have an office job 272 00:21:08.800 --> 00:21:15.040 and I don't work out in the wild, you know? So it's like, I kind of need to do it in another, 273 00:21:16.720 --> 00:21:24.720 in another way, you know? Exactly. So yeah, it's just super empowering. And so I signed up 274 00:21:24.720 --> 00:21:31.920 and I'm excited to eat. And next, next week is going to be like the food, but it's, it's, 275 00:21:33.600 --> 00:21:40.720 it's all on, it's this like six weeks program, but it's also not like weighing or anything. 276 00:21:40.720 --> 00:21:46.480 It's just, you're learning about what nutrients are good for your body. What does it do to your 277 00:21:46.480 --> 00:21:53.360 body? Like why do we need proteins? Like how do you like set a plate up? Like what are the good 278 00:21:53.360 --> 00:21:58.960 things of the healthy fats and like, and both end like, yes, enjoy this thing, but like not every 279 00:21:58.960 --> 00:22:06.160 day, you know? So I signed up a year, like not fully a year ago. And then I tried, but I just 280 00:22:06.160 --> 00:22:11.920 couldn't do it. And then I've been following it. And now I felt like, that's great. I wrote her 281 00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:18.640 and I was like, Hey, can I be on the mailing list for like your next group of people? Because then 282 00:22:18.640 --> 00:22:23.360 she'll write me every like, Oh, this is the week we're focusing on this. And like, how's that going? 283 00:22:23.360 --> 00:22:29.360 And, and it just feels right. And I feel like, I just believe like this, it's going to be effortless, 284 00:22:29.360 --> 00:22:33.760 like I'm, I'm gonna get it kind of, you know what I mean? Like, it's just gonna be like, Oh, 285 00:22:34.400 --> 00:22:42.160 I'm actually gonna change my lifestyle now, but not in this like a rigid, but from from freedom 286 00:22:42.160 --> 00:22:48.960 and from rest and not from the knowledge of good and evil. And, you know, like the tree of life, 287 00:22:48.960 --> 00:22:52.320 you know, where it's just like, Oh, I need to count this and I need to do this and I need to 288 00:22:52.320 --> 00:22:59.040 weigh this and I can't, you know, but no, it's just going to be this. This is good for my body. 289 00:22:59.040 --> 00:23:05.200 Like, this is how we were created. Yeah. This is what I want for me. This is what I want for me. 290 00:23:05.200 --> 00:23:11.200 This is the life style or what I, the, what the type of experience I want to give my body. This 291 00:23:11.200 --> 00:23:16.640 is my body to be, this is the experience that I want to have in my body, you know, where it's 292 00:23:16.640 --> 00:23:23.040 strong. I want to treat. Yeah. I want to treat my body how I believe God treats, wants to treat me, 293 00:23:23.040 --> 00:23:28.880 which is good. And I'm like, well, then I want to accept and embrace, but that also means I want to 294 00:23:28.880 --> 00:23:36.480 give it things that are good for it and not things to harm it. Yeah. Yeah. You know? Yeah. So I don't 295 00:23:36.480 --> 00:23:43.600 know. I it'll be interesting to see. I'm hopeful. That's huge. I'm so excited. You really have made 296 00:23:43.600 --> 00:23:53.440 very, very big, big breakthroughs. And because if you remember back to like, say for instance, 297 00:23:53.440 --> 00:23:59.200 January, or I don't know, maybe sometime this summer, if you know, you felt stuck that we just, 298 00:24:00.080 --> 00:24:05.600 there's, there's things that we know we need to change, but we just don't feel that we know 299 00:24:06.400 --> 00:24:14.080 how, like, we feel like we don't know in our head what to do, or we just don't know how to, 300 00:24:15.280 --> 00:24:21.600 um, they, uh, what foundation we need to be motivated by because the motivations that 301 00:24:21.600 --> 00:24:28.000 we're using in order to follow these steps just aren't working, you know, anyway, and then to just, 302 00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:33.600 uh, so anyway, what you're talking about and what it is that you've done and the choices that you've 303 00:24:33.600 --> 00:24:40.720 made have been hard, but they're, they're huge. They're literally life shifting. Yeah. But yeah, 304 00:24:40.720 --> 00:24:47.680 so excited. That's great. Yeah, I am. And I'm just like, yeah, I'm, I'm hopeful to see that, you 305 00:24:47.680 --> 00:24:55.520 know, that I'm hopeful to see that, um, my body will align with like, my spirit and the soul will 306 00:24:55.520 --> 00:24:59.920 like, I don't know, I, what I'm hoping or what I'm feeling is that 307 00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:05.420 I, the spirit is like healing the soul, like what, what, what, 308 00:25:06.540 --> 00:25:10.440 that there were some wounds there that have led me to like, be 309 00:25:10.440 --> 00:25:14.400 harmed, like act harmful towards my body and like overeating or 310 00:25:14.400 --> 00:25:17.300 like doing these things. And I don't know, I'm just like, 311 00:25:17.300 --> 00:25:20.680 really hopeful for all of them to align now. And I can feel it 312 00:25:20.680 --> 00:25:25.080 with the exercise. And so I'm just hoping, or I'm hopeful that 313 00:25:25.080 --> 00:25:27.640 that is what's going to happen with the with the food as well, 314 00:25:27.640 --> 00:25:30.520 and that the weight will drop, but I'm not stressing about it 315 00:25:30.520 --> 00:25:33.960 the same I was. I don't feel like so I feel like that's 316 00:25:33.960 --> 00:25:37.120 breakthrough in itself. Because what I really want that I've 317 00:25:37.120 --> 00:25:41.600 never had since I was a kid is like, just this healthy 318 00:25:42.460 --> 00:25:46.320 relationship with food where you know, like where you eat for 319 00:25:46.320 --> 00:25:49.860 nutrients, but also because it's good, but you want to make good 320 00:25:49.860 --> 00:25:53.640 choices for your body. And you actually want to eat healthy 321 00:25:53.640 --> 00:25:58.720 because it's good. It's good, and it's good for you. Yeah. So 322 00:25:58.740 --> 00:26:02.920 so I'm hopeful that that's going to be like my breakthrough where 323 00:26:03.000 --> 00:26:05.040 I never have to think about like, 324 00:26:06.760 --> 00:26:10.880 dieting or, you know, like counting calories. And I don't 325 00:26:10.880 --> 00:26:14.160 know, it feels massive. Like you're saying it feels like a 326 00:26:14.280 --> 00:26:15.560 Yeah, yeah. 327 00:26:15.600 --> 00:26:19.560 A big shift. Yeah, it's it's exciting. They always say that, 328 00:26:20.240 --> 00:26:24.440 that in order to make those big shifts in eating, you actually 329 00:26:24.440 --> 00:26:29.920 have to love yourself and enjoy yourself. And then you end up 330 00:26:29.920 --> 00:26:34.560 not desiring all of the things that don't make you feel good. 331 00:26:34.800 --> 00:26:40.200 Because you enjoy yourself in your body so much that you don't 332 00:26:40.240 --> 00:26:44.720 give yourself a negative experience. Yeah, because we can 333 00:26:44.720 --> 00:26:50.760 think, oh, I'm trying to, I'm trying to address this wound 334 00:26:50.800 --> 00:26:54.680 that I have in me by being comforted. And so I'm going to 335 00:26:54.680 --> 00:26:58.720 make this food choice as my choice of comforting myself, 336 00:26:58.720 --> 00:27:01.680 because I can choose myself in a variety of ways. But I'm 337 00:27:01.680 --> 00:27:06.240 choosing the food to try to meet my need. But when it gives us 338 00:27:06.240 --> 00:27:10.480 such a negative experience, we end up not wanting it. And so I 339 00:27:10.480 --> 00:27:14.880 have the same thing with I used to be so addicted to sugar, that 340 00:27:14.880 --> 00:27:21.760 even if it was cheap food, I still I still wanted it to the 341 00:27:21.760 --> 00:27:26.000 point where it was like it was like an addiction. And, and I 342 00:27:26.000 --> 00:27:29.200 thought this is really bad. And this is really sad. But at the 343 00:27:29.200 --> 00:27:32.720 same time, it was like, well, yeah, but this is all I know. 344 00:27:33.040 --> 00:27:38.000 And I noticed that when I began to love who it is that I was and 345 00:27:38.000 --> 00:27:42.320 began to own more of my my own life, my own decisions, felt 346 00:27:42.320 --> 00:27:45.120 empowered to design my own life kind of thing with the Lord, 347 00:27:45.120 --> 00:27:48.680 obviously, but didn't feel a victim even to him. I just felt 348 00:27:48.680 --> 00:27:51.640 I have the choice to obey him, but I'm not a victim to him. 349 00:27:52.000 --> 00:28:01.000 Then I found that I don't want and look to sugar, or even or 350 00:28:01.000 --> 00:28:03.160 food in general, but I'm just mentioning sugar to be more 351 00:28:03.160 --> 00:28:07.360 specific about something. I don't look to it as a way to 352 00:28:07.840 --> 00:28:11.760 comfort me. In fact, I've noticed that when I want 353 00:28:11.760 --> 00:28:18.440 comfort. Sorry, I keep looking over here because people that we 354 00:28:18.440 --> 00:28:21.320 live with that we live that we're renting an apartment 355 00:28:21.320 --> 00:28:25.080 from, I watched him walk across the way, which I thought was so 356 00:28:25.080 --> 00:28:27.400 odd, because I never seen him do that across to where other 357 00:28:27.400 --> 00:28:30.760 neighbors and now they're all outside laughing so loudly, I 358 00:28:30.760 --> 00:28:35.520 can hear them. And so I'm very distracted. But anyway, and that 359 00:28:35.560 --> 00:28:42.360 I, I noticed that even when I want comfort now, when the 360 00:28:42.400 --> 00:28:48.560 because I feel so, how do I put it? It's not even just that I 361 00:28:48.560 --> 00:28:58.840 physically feel bad. When I eat when I like drink Coke, or I or, 362 00:28:59.280 --> 00:29:03.040 you know, I eat junk food or whatever. It's not even that I 363 00:29:03.040 --> 00:29:08.120 negatively that I that I feel physically bad. It's that 364 00:29:08.120 --> 00:29:13.680 psychologically it grosses me out. Because psychologically, I 365 00:29:13.680 --> 00:29:20.680 have it no longer can fill a need because it's so cheap. It 366 00:29:20.680 --> 00:29:26.560 makes me feel cheap to use it as comfort. So when I'm wanting 367 00:29:26.560 --> 00:29:30.040 comfort, and I'm kind of looking for it somewhere, I 368 00:29:30.040 --> 00:29:35.200 usually don't get foods like it. What the image that's coming to 369 00:29:35.200 --> 00:29:37.320 mind is like when you go to the movie theater, whatever, and you 370 00:29:37.320 --> 00:29:42.480 get Coke and popcorn or whatever. And, and, and it's 371 00:29:42.480 --> 00:29:45.440 always so much fun to get food when you go to the movie 372 00:29:45.440 --> 00:29:48.360 theater, right? Well, it'll ask me, Ashley, do you want 373 00:29:48.360 --> 00:29:52.880 anything? And so often I'll say, No, no, I don't. Because even 374 00:29:52.880 --> 00:29:55.640 though it's fun, and it adds to the experience to have 375 00:29:55.640 --> 00:30:00.200 something, psychologically, I just, I, I, I'm 376 00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:07.420 value my body so much and I value who it is that I am so much that Coke feels like if 377 00:30:07.420 --> 00:30:12.440 I were to drink Coke or eat popcorn with all of the chemicals on that butter, you know, 378 00:30:12.440 --> 00:30:17.000 if I were to eat it, it just, or, you know, the thought of eating it just kind of repulses 379 00:30:17.000 --> 00:30:20.840 me because I feel that it's how would I put it? 380 00:30:20.840 --> 00:30:25.100 I mean, I know that I keep using the word cheap, but I'm trying to give an eye a better 381 00:30:25.100 --> 00:30:27.820 understanding of what I mean. 382 00:30:27.820 --> 00:30:34.240 It's almost like I am too, too valuable and it is too beneath me. 383 00:30:34.240 --> 00:30:46.520 So why would I, would I lower myself to drink that or to just that? 384 00:30:46.520 --> 00:30:51.160 It's almost like, you know, being okay with having your husband because she just want 385 00:30:51.160 --> 00:30:54.600 to, because she just want to ring so badly. 386 00:30:54.600 --> 00:30:56.960 You're willing to, you know, wedding ring so badly. 387 00:30:56.960 --> 00:31:05.320 You're willing to just go with, you know, go with like a cheap, cheap glass instead 388 00:31:05.320 --> 00:31:06.620 of diamond. 389 00:31:06.620 --> 00:31:07.620 Something like that. 390 00:31:07.620 --> 00:31:13.520 It's like, well, that just cheapens the whole thing is what you think. 391 00:31:13.520 --> 00:31:15.520 And it's not that it cheapens the marriage. 392 00:31:15.520 --> 00:31:20.800 So it's not like a perfect idea of like, it's like, no, this is a very precious thing that 393 00:31:20.800 --> 00:31:22.520 we're trying to symbolize. 394 00:31:22.520 --> 00:31:25.560 And why on earth would we want to cheapen it with glass? 395 00:31:25.560 --> 00:31:29.920 Wouldn't we just want like nothing or, or like simple and early something. 396 00:31:29.920 --> 00:31:33.040 In other words, something that actually matches the value. 397 00:31:33.040 --> 00:31:37.160 And so that's how I've noticed that my mindset towards food has changed. 398 00:31:37.160 --> 00:31:43.340 I have had major problems with my weight historically in my life where I've gained and lost a lot 399 00:31:43.340 --> 00:31:47.680 of weight in a very short periods of time. 400 00:31:47.680 --> 00:31:54.040 So I was addicted to food to that extent that and comforted myself with food to that extent 401 00:31:54.040 --> 00:31:55.960 that I gained 40 pounds. 402 00:31:55.960 --> 00:32:02.560 My freshman year, I'm trying to think if I gained like how, how much I gained, I think 403 00:32:02.560 --> 00:32:11.600 I gained 25 or 30 pounds the first semester of my freshman year. 404 00:32:11.600 --> 00:32:19.320 So by the time I went home for Christmas, I'd gained somewhere between 25 and 30 pounds. 405 00:32:19.320 --> 00:32:24.720 So when it comes to like the freshman 15 of gaining 15 pounds, you know, your first 406 00:32:24.720 --> 00:32:28.120 year at college, I gained between 25 and 30. 407 00:32:28.120 --> 00:32:34.600 My first semester, I can, you know, I'm a driver, so I can go big or go home. 408 00:32:34.600 --> 00:32:41.200 If I was going to do it in style, you're like, I'm going to do this right. 409 00:32:41.200 --> 00:32:43.680 You would be shocked at how much food that I ate. 410 00:32:43.680 --> 00:32:49.960 You would be shocked at how much food I would eat at every meal. 411 00:32:49.960 --> 00:32:50.960 I'm shocked. 412 00:32:50.960 --> 00:32:54.040 But at the time, I didn't realize it. 413 00:32:54.040 --> 00:33:03.960 I was too, I was too blinded by, by my own pain, and that I didn't realize how much food 414 00:33:03.960 --> 00:33:04.960 I was eating. 415 00:33:04.960 --> 00:33:11.120 And now not to mention the fact that everything was had such high caloric and sugar content. 416 00:33:11.120 --> 00:33:13.480 So anyway, my point is to just kind of paint a picture. 417 00:33:13.480 --> 00:33:17.440 I have like really, really, really struggled very majorly in my life for like many years. 418 00:33:17.440 --> 00:33:19.640 We're not talking about, oh, that was just my college phase. 419 00:33:19.640 --> 00:33:20.720 No, no, no. 420 00:33:20.720 --> 00:33:28.200 We're talking high school all the way through, I don't know, 20s, maybe my, maybe my mid 421 00:33:28.200 --> 00:33:29.200 twenties. 422 00:33:29.200 --> 00:33:30.200 I thought it was longer. 423 00:33:30.200 --> 00:33:33.960 That feels longer than that has to be longer than that because it feels like so it's such 424 00:33:33.960 --> 00:33:40.120 a big part of my life, but now I realize I have not struggled with it for a very long 425 00:33:40.120 --> 00:33:41.120 time. 426 00:33:41.120 --> 00:33:42.640 So I haven't thought about when I stopped struggling with it. 427 00:33:42.640 --> 00:33:45.920 And when I like went down to what I want to know, it was my thirties. 428 00:33:45.920 --> 00:33:46.920 It was in my thirties. 429 00:33:46.920 --> 00:33:55.720 So anyway, my point is I, I promise that it's that if you just change your value system 430 00:33:55.720 --> 00:34:01.240 of yourself and your life and experience, you want to have that these things that you 431 00:34:01.240 --> 00:34:08.560 no longer have to psychologically fight the temptations that you might do, you know, your 432 00:34:08.560 --> 00:34:12.679 temptations psychologically might not look like the ones I described, but we all have 433 00:34:12.679 --> 00:34:17.120 reasons why we're eating and we all have things that I want to, but I'm trying not to, I want 434 00:34:17.120 --> 00:34:18.719 to, but I'm trying not to. 435 00:34:18.719 --> 00:34:19.719 And we all have these things. 436 00:34:19.719 --> 00:34:23.440 We keep trying to talk ourselves out of in order to not be destructive in our habits 437 00:34:23.440 --> 00:34:30.639 and whatever those things are, those change when we, when our reasons for those temptations 438 00:34:30.639 --> 00:34:37.199 coming up, go away, we finally love ourselves and whatever we no longer have to fight to 439 00:34:37.199 --> 00:34:38.400 not eat something. 440 00:34:38.400 --> 00:34:39.400 We don't want to. 441 00:34:39.400 --> 00:34:46.760 In fact, I'm to the point now where I had to eat a lot in order to gain some muscle 442 00:34:46.760 --> 00:34:48.360 recently. 443 00:34:48.360 --> 00:34:55.320 And I, I, food was just making me sick because I was like, please don't make me eat anymore. 444 00:34:55.320 --> 00:34:59.360 And I never thought that I could be like that, but it is absolutely possible. 445 00:34:59.360 --> 00:35:00.000 And I thought, Oh, is. 446 00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:04.260 This would like, like anorexic people feel like where you feel like where they're just 447 00:35:04.260 --> 00:35:06.580 like, don't, don't make me eat anymore. 448 00:35:06.580 --> 00:35:07.580 It makes me feel bad. 449 00:35:07.580 --> 00:35:13.340 So I'm like, no, I finally understand how that can, how that, uh, that psychology works. 450 00:35:13.340 --> 00:35:16.180 But anyway, so that's encouraging, hopefully to you. 451 00:35:16.180 --> 00:35:17.180 Yeah. 452 00:35:17.180 --> 00:35:18.180 So encouraging. 453 00:35:18.180 --> 00:35:19.180 Thank you for sharing. 454 00:35:19.180 --> 00:35:20.180 Yeah. 455 00:35:20.180 --> 00:35:23.100 It'll change this other stuff. 456 00:35:23.100 --> 00:35:27.100 Otherwise it's just trying to change the symptoms and hard. 457 00:35:27.100 --> 00:35:33.600 It's a lot more work than changing the other, changing the other, like get rid of the symptoms, 458 00:35:33.600 --> 00:35:36.200 you know, root cause of anyway. 459 00:35:36.200 --> 00:35:40.240 And that's what I feel like it's so interesting is that, cause I feel like what we've been 460 00:35:40.240 --> 00:35:46.200 talking about this entire program, you know, is about the foundational stuff and, you know, 461 00:35:46.200 --> 00:35:52.200 like going deeper into it and being loved by God and trusting him and loving ourselves 462 00:35:52.200 --> 00:35:54.920 and, you know, embracing ourselves and all of that. 463 00:35:54.920 --> 00:35:58.300 And like, you've been saying, Oh, as a by-product, these things will happen. 464 00:35:58.300 --> 00:36:00.580 And I'm starting to see like, Oh, okay. 465 00:36:00.580 --> 00:36:04.780 Maybe it's not like it happens like that, but it's like, Oh, but it's happening step 466 00:36:04.780 --> 00:36:05.780 by step. 467 00:36:05.780 --> 00:36:07.500 And it's like, Oh, and I'm excited about it. 468 00:36:07.500 --> 00:36:08.500 You know? 469 00:36:08.500 --> 00:36:09.500 So I'm excited. 470 00:36:09.500 --> 00:36:10.500 You sharing this. 471 00:36:10.500 --> 00:36:11.900 I'm like, Oh, I'm excited until I'm going to be there. 472 00:36:11.900 --> 00:36:12.900 You know? 473 00:36:12.900 --> 00:36:13.900 Cause I know I will. 474 00:36:13.900 --> 00:36:14.900 You know? 475 00:36:14.900 --> 00:36:18.620 And the, we're doing it this way, even though people can feel like, Oh my word, this just 476 00:36:18.620 --> 00:36:23.140 takes so much longer rather than like addressing the symptom this way, it gets rid of it for 477 00:36:23.140 --> 00:36:24.140 good. 478 00:36:24.360 --> 00:36:25.360 Yeah. 479 00:36:25.360 --> 00:36:29.520 It's just getting rid of the symptom and the amount of that you have to put into addressing 480 00:36:29.520 --> 00:36:30.520 it from that perspective. 481 00:36:30.520 --> 00:36:34.200 Like say for instance, doing these very extreme diets that you can't maintain that aren't 482 00:36:34.200 --> 00:36:36.560 lifestyle diet and you can't maintain it. 483 00:36:36.560 --> 00:36:41.160 Well, the problem with, with, with those is that the amount of effort that you have to 484 00:36:41.160 --> 00:36:47.240 put in, like, like emotionally and psychologically in order to sustain yourself in that diet 485 00:36:47.240 --> 00:36:48.840 is not a season. 486 00:36:48.840 --> 00:36:53.200 That is what you have to do in order to keep whatever it is that you, whatever it is that 487 00:36:53.260 --> 00:36:59.220 whatever goal you reached, you have to continue that internal exerted effort. 488 00:36:59.220 --> 00:37:00.260 Maybe not that diet. 489 00:37:00.260 --> 00:37:04.660 You could try another one, but the internal effort that it takes to me, because whatever 490 00:37:04.660 --> 00:37:08.980 you use in order to get something is what you have to use to maintain it. 491 00:37:08.980 --> 00:37:13.980 So if you do it this other way, you're dealing with the foundation and therefore it's effortless 492 00:37:13.980 --> 00:37:14.980 to maintain. 493 00:37:14.980 --> 00:37:15.980 Yeah. 494 00:37:15.980 --> 00:37:20.980 And so I just personally prefer once I discovered this, meaning like once I discovered how to 495 00:37:20.980 --> 00:37:24.560 deal with like root issues that the Lord created for us to deal with root issues. 496 00:37:24.560 --> 00:37:26.280 It's like, Oh, my word. 497 00:37:26.280 --> 00:37:32.560 It makes the rest of my life easy because I'm, I'm being, I'm willing to put in the 498 00:37:32.560 --> 00:37:34.800 hard work, not the hard work. 499 00:37:34.800 --> 00:37:35.800 How do I put that? 500 00:37:35.800 --> 00:37:42.200 It willing to put in the time on the front end in order to, you know, it'll take a bit 501 00:37:42.200 --> 00:37:50.200 longer to get, you know, X, Y, and Z accomplished or X, Y, and Z manifestation, but I get to 502 00:37:50.200 --> 00:37:55.020 enjoy the manifestation and the effortless of maintaining it for the rest of my life. 503 00:37:55.020 --> 00:38:00.900 And anyway, and it's only people that, that see that value and are willing to see the 504 00:38:00.900 --> 00:38:03.800 value in that, that can do this. 505 00:38:03.800 --> 00:38:05.460 Other people are just like quick fix. 506 00:38:05.460 --> 00:38:11.500 I'm like, okay, you can, you can go to someone else to give you a quick fix anyway, but yeah. 507 00:38:11.500 --> 00:38:12.500 Well, I'm excited. 508 00:38:12.500 --> 00:38:13.500 It's huge. 509 00:38:13.500 --> 00:38:14.500 I'm so excited. 510 00:38:14.500 --> 00:38:15.500 Yeah. 511 00:38:15.500 --> 00:38:16.500 It really is. 512 00:38:16.500 --> 00:38:20.140 Cause it's like I did the, I've been doing all the different diets that didn't work 513 00:38:21.080 --> 00:38:26.440 and then COVID, I started like this program, but like that was also very rigid. 514 00:38:26.440 --> 00:38:30.440 So, and what I could see is that that was able to sustain me for a while until life 515 00:38:30.440 --> 00:38:37.960 crumbled and my dad passed away and, you know, like all of these things happened and I felt 516 00:38:37.960 --> 00:38:41.920 out of control and then I went straight back into it and I gained everything that I've 517 00:38:41.920 --> 00:38:46.920 been working for, for like three years, like that, you know? 518 00:38:46.920 --> 00:38:53.380 And yeah, but, but now I'm like, oh, but obviously cause I, I hadn't dealt with the 519 00:38:53.380 --> 00:38:54.380 root issue. 520 00:38:54.380 --> 00:38:55.380 That's the thing. 521 00:38:55.380 --> 00:38:56.820 It was just dealing with the symptoms. 522 00:38:56.820 --> 00:38:59.460 And so it's like, yeah, of course I could go. 523 00:38:59.460 --> 00:39:04.620 And now it's like, because I'm on this journey, it's almost like, God's been like, no, those 524 00:39:04.620 --> 00:39:07.140 things didn't work, you know? 525 00:39:07.140 --> 00:39:11.500 And it's cause he wants to address the root issue and have me be free forever, you know, 526 00:39:11.500 --> 00:39:12.740 which I'm so excited about. 527 00:39:12.740 --> 00:39:14.740 So this is so encouraging. 528 00:39:14.800 --> 00:39:19.680 This is why I wanted to like go after the weight first is because it's like, or like 529 00:39:19.680 --> 00:39:25.720 this whole like issue one, because it's been a major struggle in my life forever. 530 00:39:25.720 --> 00:39:28.420 But also cause it's something that you physically can see. 531 00:39:28.420 --> 00:39:34.560 And I feel like if I get that, it manifests in like all these other areas of life. 532 00:39:34.560 --> 00:39:38.920 And so that's what I'm seeing now is like, oh, well, it's not like I have to do this 533 00:39:38.920 --> 00:39:40.320 and then these things happen. 534 00:39:40.320 --> 00:39:42.080 It's like, no, this is a way of life. 535 00:39:42.080 --> 00:39:43.840 Like you're saying this is a way of living. 536 00:39:44.140 --> 00:39:44.500 Yeah. 537 00:39:44.500 --> 00:39:46.860 And it just affects all the areas of your life. 538 00:39:46.860 --> 00:39:51.220 You don't just work with one, you know, it's like, it's the general thing. 539 00:39:51.220 --> 00:39:57.020 Like you just like choose to trust God and that he's good and that he has control and 540 00:39:57.020 --> 00:39:59.700 you can actually let it go and like love yourself. 541 00:39:59.700 --> 00:40:00.060 And then. 542 00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:03.560 and things just start falling into place. 543 00:40:03.560 --> 00:40:04.560 Yeah. 544 00:40:04.560 --> 00:40:05.400 Yeah. 545 00:40:05.400 --> 00:40:06.220 Good. 546 00:40:06.220 --> 00:40:07.060 I'm so excited. 547 00:40:07.060 --> 00:40:07.900 Also, I'm so excited too. 548 00:40:07.900 --> 00:40:08.720 So very excited. 549 00:40:08.720 --> 00:40:12.920 The testimony of like in the updates of where you are 550 00:40:12.920 --> 00:40:15.880 and I hope you enjoy the session that I uploaded. 551 00:40:15.880 --> 00:40:17.720 Oh yeah, I'm so excited to hear it. 552 00:40:17.720 --> 00:40:21.480 You know, it's about, I'm talking about, you know, 553 00:40:21.480 --> 00:40:23.320 how to get to know ourselves 554 00:40:24.280 --> 00:40:27.880 when we're actually stopping stifling 555 00:40:27.960 --> 00:40:30.680 or denying who it is that we actually are. 556 00:40:30.680 --> 00:40:32.040 So who comes up? 557 00:40:32.040 --> 00:40:33.400 Cause we've been afraid of that. 558 00:40:33.400 --> 00:40:35.040 Then we just in this past session, you know, 559 00:40:35.040 --> 00:40:36.680 made the choice to fully accept ourselves 560 00:40:36.680 --> 00:40:38.620 unconditionally and the Lord. 561 00:40:38.620 --> 00:40:43.320 However we discover in this discovery process 562 00:40:43.320 --> 00:40:45.080 that we actually are. 563 00:40:45.080 --> 00:40:47.200 And then all of that stuff will now, 564 00:40:47.200 --> 00:40:49.320 now we're inviting all of that stuff to come up 565 00:40:49.320 --> 00:40:51.360 so we can get to know who it is that we are. 566 00:40:51.360 --> 00:40:55.360 And then a big part of what I talk about is in the emotions 567 00:40:55.360 --> 00:40:56.880 and the decisions as well. 568 00:40:56.880 --> 00:40:58.880 But I focus mainly on the emotions. 569 00:40:58.880 --> 00:41:00.600 How do we, when, as they come up, 570 00:41:00.600 --> 00:41:03.420 how do we let things go that we don't, 571 00:41:03.420 --> 00:41:04.960 that are indicative of things in us 572 00:41:04.960 --> 00:41:06.200 that we don't want to keep. 573 00:41:06.200 --> 00:41:08.280 There are things that are, that are going to come up 574 00:41:08.280 --> 00:41:11.520 that are like dreams and that are good, positive things. 575 00:41:11.520 --> 00:41:13.600 But then there are other things that are just, 576 00:41:13.600 --> 00:41:16.280 that cause us to actually stifle all of our emotions, 577 00:41:16.280 --> 00:41:17.600 including joy and happiness, 578 00:41:17.600 --> 00:41:21.580 because we're trying to stifle the negative emotions. 579 00:41:21.580 --> 00:41:23.520 And when we do, we stifle all of them, 580 00:41:23.520 --> 00:41:24.920 but we stifle all emotions. 581 00:41:24.920 --> 00:41:27.200 So in the negative ones, we're trying to stifle fear. 582 00:41:27.200 --> 00:41:29.080 We're trying to stifle our anger 583 00:41:29.080 --> 00:41:31.600 because well, I shouldn't be mad, you know, 584 00:41:31.600 --> 00:41:33.080 and we're trying to stifle all these. 585 00:41:33.080 --> 00:41:37.080 We're not really realizing it and getting to know ourselves 586 00:41:37.080 --> 00:41:40.680 and know honestly, truly, how am I viewing this situation? 587 00:41:40.680 --> 00:41:43.340 Am I honestly repulsed by this person or not? 588 00:41:43.340 --> 00:41:45.320 And if we are, and that's one of the examples 589 00:41:45.320 --> 00:41:46.400 that I mentioned there, 590 00:41:46.400 --> 00:41:48.280 if you're repulsed by someone 591 00:41:48.280 --> 00:41:49.840 to acknowledge that to yourself, 592 00:41:49.840 --> 00:41:53.640 no, that really is me being repulsed by this person. 593 00:41:53.640 --> 00:41:56.560 It doesn't mean that you agree with this fact 594 00:41:56.560 --> 00:41:58.080 that you should stay like that, 595 00:41:58.080 --> 00:42:00.680 or you agree with where on earth that that's coming from, 596 00:42:00.680 --> 00:42:03.560 or that that's coming from any kind of truth. 597 00:42:03.560 --> 00:42:06.760 It's just that you're being honest that that, 598 00:42:06.760 --> 00:42:10.160 and honest that that is coming out of you 599 00:42:10.160 --> 00:42:13.400 and to not disassociate yourself from what you're feeling. 600 00:42:13.400 --> 00:42:15.840 Like, nope, that was a choice that I made. 601 00:42:15.840 --> 00:42:19.240 Not the choice that your identity and spirit made, 602 00:42:19.240 --> 00:42:20.760 but yourself is like, 603 00:42:20.760 --> 00:42:22.920 you are your soul and your body as well. 604 00:42:23.360 --> 00:42:25.600 You have a soul in your body 605 00:42:25.600 --> 00:42:26.920 and your soul is making that choice. 606 00:42:26.920 --> 00:42:29.760 So it's like, okay, well, in order to let it go, 607 00:42:29.760 --> 00:42:31.400 I have to acknowledge that it's true 608 00:42:31.400 --> 00:42:33.800 and I have to associate myself with it. 609 00:42:33.800 --> 00:42:35.960 Not associate your identity with it, 610 00:42:35.960 --> 00:42:38.840 but associate that, hey, your soul, your soul, 611 00:42:38.840 --> 00:42:41.400 nobody else's, your soul made that choice. 612 00:42:41.400 --> 00:42:43.400 And then now you can deal with it and whatever. 613 00:42:43.400 --> 00:42:44.800 So I talk about that. 614 00:42:44.800 --> 00:42:47.240 I talk about, and then I talk about decisions 615 00:42:47.240 --> 00:42:48.160 and how the decision, 616 00:42:48.160 --> 00:42:51.000 we can look at past decisions that we've made 617 00:42:51.080 --> 00:42:53.000 and how we're actually living out 618 00:42:53.000 --> 00:42:55.680 the results of those decisions 619 00:42:55.680 --> 00:42:58.280 can tell us things about ourselves 620 00:42:58.280 --> 00:42:59.760 and where we're putting our value, 621 00:42:59.760 --> 00:43:01.480 what it is that we believe, et cetera. 622 00:43:01.480 --> 00:43:05.680 And then how we can look at how, 623 00:43:05.680 --> 00:43:08.080 at our current decision-making process 624 00:43:08.080 --> 00:43:09.880 as we're making decisions 625 00:43:09.880 --> 00:43:12.560 and use that to get to know ourselves. 626 00:43:12.560 --> 00:43:14.920 Like, oh my goodness, I'm wanting to do this. 627 00:43:14.920 --> 00:43:16.440 Why would I want to do that? 628 00:43:16.440 --> 00:43:17.760 You know, et cetera. 629 00:43:17.760 --> 00:43:19.080 And getting to know ourselves that way. 630 00:43:19.080 --> 00:43:21.200 So anyway, that's what I talked about. 631 00:43:21.200 --> 00:43:23.120 So I hope it's interesting. 632 00:43:23.120 --> 00:43:24.840 Oh yeah, I'm so excited to hear it. 633 00:43:24.840 --> 00:43:26.280 Thanks for including. 634 00:43:26.280 --> 00:43:27.120 Good. 635 00:43:28.400 --> 00:43:30.680 Well, I'll let you go then. 636 00:43:30.680 --> 00:43:32.280 Thank you so much. 637 00:43:32.280 --> 00:43:33.600 I'll try to make it on Monday, 638 00:43:33.600 --> 00:43:36.240 but I get Texas in the house on Saturday 639 00:43:36.240 --> 00:43:37.800 and they're staying until Wednesday. 640 00:43:37.800 --> 00:43:40.080 So I don't know how that's gonna work out, 641 00:43:40.080 --> 00:43:43.040 but if not, I'll join on Thursday, if not. 642 00:43:43.040 --> 00:43:45.040 Okay, that sounds good. 643 00:43:45.040 --> 00:43:45.880 All right, we'll have fun. 644 00:43:45.880 --> 00:43:47.640 Well, I will definitely. 645 00:43:47.640 --> 00:43:48.640 Thanks. 646 00:43:48.640 --> 00:43:49.480 I'm excited. 647 00:43:49.480 --> 00:43:50.800 It's like her and her brother 648 00:43:50.800 --> 00:43:52.240 and her dad and her step-mom. 649 00:43:52.240 --> 00:43:55.200 So the whole crew. 650 00:43:55.200 --> 00:43:56.560 That's so special. 651 00:43:56.560 --> 00:43:59.680 Yeah, it's gonna be really great. 652 00:43:59.680 --> 00:44:00.520 I'm excited. 653 00:44:01.760 --> 00:44:03.440 Well, give me any updates you need to 654 00:44:03.440 --> 00:44:06.080 and via WhatsApp in the meantime. 655 00:44:06.080 --> 00:44:07.680 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will. 656 00:44:07.680 --> 00:44:09.280 Likewise. 657 00:44:09.280 --> 00:44:10.120 Okay, yeah, thanks. 658 00:44:10.120 --> 00:44:10.960 We'll see you. 659 00:44:10.960 --> 00:44:12.160 Yeah, yeah. 660 00:44:12.160 --> 00:44:13.920 Hope you're feeling better. 661 00:44:13.920 --> 00:44:14.760 Thank you. 662 00:44:14.760 --> 00:44:15.600 Thank you. 663 00:44:15.600 --> 00:44:16.960 I appreciate it. 664 00:44:16.960 --> 00:44:17.800 Bye. 665 00:44:17.800 --> 00:44:18.640 Okay, bye.